A fate incomplete!

A fate incomplete!

A strange twist of fate has given me the opportunity to spend quality time with my ageing parents and my extended family and friends in Dublin, something i would not have being able to do in the normal scheme of things. But unfortunately its at the expense of being apart from my portuguese husband and daughters (aged 11 & 10). This was not something I choose to do but was direct result of becoming a cancer patient again after eight years clear.

A native of Dublin, I met my husband on a sun holiday in Praia da rocha back in 2000.

We lived in Ireland over the following years during which time our two daughter were born.

Then after my first battle with cancer in 2005 I took a career break and in 2006 made the move to Alvor so I could convalesce while the girls went to school. All the while returning to Dublin to keep up with my trimonthly, biannual then annual checkups. Each exam all clear and as the years ticked by I figured I was out of the woods, so to speak!

Luis and I had had established a successful tourist boat business over the challenging interim years and by 2011 we decided to finally get married. It was the happiest day of our lives, with all our family celebrating with us on the beach in Alvor. Life was good! But unfortunately not for long, within twelve months I presented with a pain in my side only to be told this silent and deadly disease, cancer, was back.

On hearing that I had forth stage secondary cancer in my lungs, liver, brain and bones after a series of scans was devastating. To say I was shocked would be an understatement, my world turned upside down in a moment and now I had to tell my loved ones, that turned out to be the hardest part. Somehow as the victim, it made it hurt even more with each sad face that looked back at me, in sympathy!

It took all my resources to muster up the strength to find positives from such an event.

Initially my body just vibrated with the shock, a feeling that someone had pushed me to the edge of a cliff and told me to jump! I now had to learn to fly to survive! It was not going

to be easy but hey no one ever said life was easy!

So I set about acting on the energy this news stirred up, the certain knowledge that I was unfortunately not alone on this journey. I had been told the prognosis was it was treatable and it was that hope that I clung to. I was a mother of two young daughters and it was my intention, with their agreement, to be a granny some day! I have so much more to do, my time was not up yet!

Having being a breast cancer survivor from 2005 and participating in clinical trails throughout the following years of treatment it was not difficult to decide where I wanted to be treated. My home town of Dublin gave me the independence to look after my own medical care without the language barrier i would have to struggle with (having never mastered Portuguese) if I stayed in the Algarve. The support of my large extended family and friends, not to mention the team of doctors that had helped me through the years since my first diagnosis made the decision easier.

I embraced some unusual scenarios of coping after I was diagnosed! TodayFm an irish radio station who were raising money for cancer research during February were looking for people to shave their heads for a Guinness world record attempt of the most Mohican haircuts. I offered to have my head shaved to raise awareness of my plight and so began my accidental celebrity status. I was the last Mohican shaved live on air and in front of the nation! I set up a facebook page, www.facebook.com/romo2013 and the support that followed was amazing. I appeared on national tv sharing my story in the hope that it would help others struggling with their own battles. Newspaper and magazine articles carried my story and all this helped keep me distracted from my reality and it made a seemingly disastrous situation into a fun and energising experience, not only for me but for all my friends and family coping with the news.

My daughters remain my rocks throughout this whole ordeal! They bravely go to school in Alvor while I get on with my chemo in Dublin! It's not easy being apart, we miss each other so much, but this way I get to focus on getting better without the distractions of everyday

life and they continue in their day to day activities and finish their school. I have visited them regularly and they come to Dublin too. Without knowing how long my treatment is going to be, or how things will be in the future, they plan on coming to school in Dublin for this winter to be with me, but not before they get to enjoy some of the Algarve summer and sun with me in July when I complete my first round of chemo and get rescanned. fingers crossed the results will be positive.

Roisin O'Hagan roisinohagan@mac.com 00353868304259