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january 2013

In HerOwnWords:

new year, new you

We Took the Advocare 24-Day Challenge

Five Rochester Women Get New Looks for 2013

special feature

Taking Risks for her Passion

Courage, Ingenuity, Family: The Values That Drive Sharon Napier f o r a l l t h e t h i n g s t h at yo u a r e . . . r o c h e s t e r w o m a n


rochesterWomanMag.com :: january 2013


w w w. r o c h e s t e r w o m a n m a g . c o m



“BREATHTAKING” The New York Times

“A TOUR-DE-FORCE” Atlanta Journal Constitution

JAN 8 - FEB 10

“DON’T MISS” Atlanta Town Paper


2012-2013 Wilson Mainstage Season Sponsor:

Music by Tom Kitt | Book and Lyrics by Brian Yorkey | Directed by Scott Schwartz

Tickets from $25 | Discounts for groups of 10+

(585) 232-4382 | www.GevaTheatre.org With Support From

Media Sponsors

Cary Tedder | Photo by Greg Mooney

Featuring an electrifying contemporary score of more than 30 songs, this groundbreaking, Tony Award and Pulitzer Prize-winning musical is an emotional powerhouse. Captivating and ultimately hopeful, Next to Normal aims right for the heart with its story of a suburban family coming to terms with its past and bravely facing its future.

Rolling Stone

Introducing Our New

St. Ann’s Care Center in Webster. The new St. Ann’s Care Center at Cherry Ridge brings a whole new kind of care to Webster. First of all, it adds Transitional Care and Skilled Nursing to our Webster campus. That means we provide a full continuum of care–all in one place. But the St. Ann’s Care Center at Cherry Ridge also brings you a revolutionary new approach, called person centered care. The result? Small, friendly “neighborhoods” where we can get to know you better.

Country kitchens where you can gather for meals– or even do some cooking of your own. And a whole new way of doing things that gives you more choices than ever. It’s something brand new. But it comes from a very old belief: that it’s a wonderful privilege to care for The Most Important People on Earth. For more information, call St. Ann’s Community at 585-697-6311. Or visit www.StAnnsCommunity.com.

at Cherry Ridge


































WOMAN magazine

OUR TEAM... Publishers

Kelly Breuer Barbara McSpadden


Barbara McSpadden

associate editor Ashley Cooper

Creative DIRECTOR Kelly Breuer

Art Director Melissa Meritt

Letter from the PUBLISHERS

Graphic Design

“The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.”-- Eleanor Roosevelt


The beginning of a new year always brings with it the promise of new beginnings and new opportunities and, of course, some resolutions. January first is just really another day on the calendar, but it feels like we’re starting over with a clean slate. In our minds, there are nothing but positive thoughts and great expectations as to what the new year may bring. Our cover woman, Sharon Napier is the perfect person to start off Rochester Woman Magazine’s 2013 season. Recently named one of the top 100 Most Influential Women in Advertising, Sharon successfully built her company in her own style based on her family values. She was told it would never work in business, but she went ahead anyway and happily proved everyone wrong. You can read Sharon’s incredible story on page [36]. A new year often inspires people, especially women, to have a new look or a new style. This new year, we asked five local women of all different age’s and lifestyles, to participate in a make-over that will leave our readers in awe with their drastiuc changes. We only made one stipulation when picking our lucky winners, and that was that they be willing to let our stylists do whatever they wanted to with their color, cuts, etc. The incredible team at Salon Bella Vita in Pittsford created fantastic new looks for all of the women. Chandelier’s Boutique, BeBe Mills Boutique, Christopher & Banks and The Chic Boutique all provided clothing and accessories to create new fashion styles for our five models. Check out the results starting on page [27]. You truly won’t believe your eyes! If you’re like us, you probably over indulged in sweets and goodies during the holidays. We planned ahead this year and decided to participate in the Advocare 24-Day Challenge. We had heard a lot about the program from some of our close friends and were curious as to how it actually worked. We decided to sign up and accept the challenge. After all, it is only 24 days, how bad can it be? Turn to page [42] to see our results and read our stories. This is the start of our fourth year of publishing Rochester Woman Magazine and we’ve got a lot of new and exciting things planned for the coming year. So we hope you enjoy this first issue of 2013 and here’s to a happy and prosperous New Year for everyone.

Kell y & Barb

On Our Cover...

Photography for the cover story with Sharon Napier of Partners + Napier was provided by Brandon Vick Photography and was taken on location. Hair was provided by Tiffanie Niger owner of Salon Bella Vita and make-up by Joan E. Lincoln.

Jane Marseglia

Rome Celli Rob Daniels Jenniffer Merida Brandon Vick

Contributing Writers Lorraine Bohonos Kristine Bruneau Sarah Jane Clifford Becca Even Amy Gallo Amanda Hebing Dr. Sherrif Ibrahim Joan E. Lincoln Amy Long Angella Luyk Maureen “Katie” Male Mark Forrest Patrick Caurie Putnam Nicole Shein Pam Werts

Advertise with us...

Unlike any other publication in the Rochester area, our feature articles address major topics that interest local women. Each issue includes articles on health, fashion, fitness, finance, home matters, dining, lifestyle and personal perspectives, as well as a spotlight on local Rochester women. Ads are due on the 15th of the month prior to publication. The print magazines will be distributed locally in over 350 locations and will be in your inbox electronically by the middle of every month. The publication is available free of charge. Contact our home office 585.287.5362 1115 E. Main St, Box 60 Rochester, NY 14609 info@rochesterwomanmag.com Download our media kit at www.rochesterwomanmag.com The magazine is published 11 times a year by InnovateHER Media Group, llc. 1115 E. Main Street, Box 60, Rochester NY 14609. Copyright © 2013 InnovateHER Media Group, llc. No part of this magazine may be reproduced or republished without the consent of the publishers. Rochester Woman Magazine is not responsible for unsolicited submissions, manuscripts, photos or artwork. All such submissions become the property of InnovateHER Media Group, llc. and will not be returned.

etc... january movies...




Los Angeles, 1949. Ruthless, Brooklyn-born mob king Mickey Cohen runs the show, reaping the ill-gotten gains from the drugs, the guns, the prostitutes and every wire bet placed west of Chicago. It’s enough to intimidate even the bravest, street-hardened cop…for the small, secret crew of LAPD outsiders led by Sgt. John O’Mara and Jerry Wooters, who to try to tear Cohen’s world apart. Billy Taggart (Mark Wahlberg) has a promising career as a New York City cop until the night he is involved in a controversial shooting. Stripped of his badge, but kept out of jail by New York’s popular Mayor (Russell Crowe), he re-makes himself as a private investigator.The mayor offers Billy $50,000 to investigate the First Lady’s (Catherine Zeta Jones) extra-marital activities.

After leaving his LAPD narcotics post following a bungled operation that left him wracked with remorse and regret, Sheriff Ray Owens moved out of Los Angeles and settled into a life fighting what little crime takes place in sleepy border town Sommerton Junction. But that peaceful existence is shattered when Gabriel Cortez, makes a deadly yet spectacular escape from an FBI prisoner convoy. Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters takes place 15 years after the siblings’ incident at the gingerbread house. In this dark spin on the fairy tale, siblings Hansel and Gretel are a formidable team of bounty hunters who track and kill witches all over the world.


Rochester Movie Makers’ 72-Hour Mind2Movie 2013 Challenge

You spend every Friday and Saturday night at the movies - have you ever thought about spending a weekend making one? Here’s your chance! Rochester Movie Makers, a non-profit organization dedicated to creating, developing, and promoting local filmmakers and filmmaking, is hosting their fourth annual Mind2Movie 72 Hour Film Competition. Beginning on Thursday, January 17 at 6 p.m. at the Assignment Event, the competition requires registered teams of filmmakers to write, film, edit, and produce a short film using a randomly assigned prop, character, and situation in 72 hours. The final films must be turned in by Sunday, January 20 at 6:30 p.m. to be considered successful entries. All completed films will be shown during a public screening on Monday, February 4 at 7 p.m. at The Cinema Theater (957 South Clinton Avenue, Rochester). Local film and media professionals will judge the films based on the best use of props, characters, situations, and film technique to determine the winners. Past judges have included The Fox 95.1 Morning Show Host Brother WEASE, Executive Director of Rochester/ Finger Lakes Film & Video Office Nora Brown, and CEO of Tipping Point Media and Public Relations Michelle Ashby. The first place winning team will receive a cash prize of $300 and the second place winners will receive $100. Registration is $75 per team and ends January 12, 2013. The competition is open to all those interested in filmmaking whether you’re a pro or a first-timer! For complete rules, information, or to register a team, visit

www.rochestermoviemakers.org/ m2m.

National Wear Red Day is February 1st In 2003, the American Heart Association (AHA), along with the National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute created National Wear Red Day® to raise awareness that Heart Disease is the No. 1 killer of women. Each year, on the first Friday in February, millions of women and men come together to wear red, take action and commit to fighting this deadly disease. Funds raised by Go Red For Women allow the AHA to help women by offering educational programs and support research to increase scientific knowledge about heart health. Since the National Wear Red Day was started 10 years ago, tremendous strides have been made in the fight against heart disease in women, including: • 21% fewer women dying from heart disease • 23% more women aware that it’s their No. 1 health threat • Publishing of gender-specific results, established differences in symptoms and responses to medications and women-specific guidelines for prevention and treatment • Legislation to help end gender disparities In an effort to bring even more attention to this you can also join the America Goes Red Challenge. Show your support for women battling heart disease by painting your town red, then snap a photo and share it on our Facebook page,


GoRedforWomen. The Challenge begins January


This year’s Wear Red for Women Day is Friday, February 1st. Everyone, men and women alike are encouraged to join the movement and wear your favorite shade of red to help raise awareness. For more information visit http://


::platter chatter 8

january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

For a Taste of Old-School

Carpani’s Italian Restaurant

By Nicole Shein | Photos by Brandon Vick You don’t get much more old-

school Italian than Carpani’s. From the pictures on the walls—vineyard scenes, saints, cobblestoned streets—to the relaxed pace, everything about this Irondequoit restaurant makes you feel as though you were in the home of an Italian family. This is the kind of place where you might walk in and discover the chef standing tableside, chatting with customers about their meals, the desserts he has waiting for them, the way restaurants serve meals in Rome. When I visited Carpani’s on a gloomy November night, that’s just where I found Chef (and owner) Mario Tartaglia. A native of Italy, Chef Tartaglia pays the same amount of attention to his food as he does to his customers. He let me try several dishes, each one clearly made with care. First, I was served a steaming plate of Chicken Madeira. A thin, tender chicken cutlet was plated on top of pasta, then smothered with roasted red pepper strips and mushrooms. The sauce, made with Madeira wine, added zing to the simple ingredients. A cup of cream-of-broccoli soup came next. With giant chunks of broccoli and a thick, creamy texture, this soup is extremely comforting, the sort of soup that you crave on cold and snowy afternoons. Artichokes French might not be authentic Italian fare, but it is a Rochester classic, and Chef Tartaglia’s version sticks pretty close to tradition. Four generously sized artichoke hearts, everso-lightly battered and ever-so-lightly fried, made for a dramatic, geometric presentation on a large shallow plate. A pale yellow sauce of de rigeuer lemon and butter added a rich note, while the hearts offered their usual earthiness. It would be a travesty to compose an Italian menu without calamari, and Carpani’s offers several varieties, including the standard deep-fried version. The one I tasted, however, was a little different. These calamari were also fried, but then sauteed with kalamata olives, pepperoncini, garlic, and tomato. The breading on the calamari was light but substantial, and the tangy taste of olives and peppers really helped to enliven this appetizer. It’s one of Carpani’s most popular. Other favorite menu items include the seafood bisque; the prime rib, which is served every night; and a special called Chicken ala Captain Mario, which includes artichoke hearts, mushrooms, red peppers, broccoli, olives and a sherry wine sauce. More old favorites you’ll find at Carpani’s include shrimp cocktail, veal parmesan, beansand-greens, Italian wedding soup--and of course the pasta. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to taste any of the homemade gnocchi, lasagna, ravioli or other classic pasta entrees, but I did get to dunk a piece of Carpani’s homemade Italian bread into some of the red sauce, which served up the traditional flavors of tomato, garlic, basil and oregano. The bread itself, which is made right in the restaurant on a daily basis, offered a golden brown, yielding crust and a soft white interior. Carpani’s is located in the Stutson Bridge Plaza in Irondequoit. Carpani’s I 155 Pattonwood Drive I Rochester NY 14617 I 585-266-2990





WOMAN magazine

Reviving 5,000 years of civilization

“A visually dazzling tour of 5,000 years of Chinese history and culture.” San Francisco Chronicle

“Brilliant choreography, extravagantly beautiful!” Broadway World

“Superb! Every performance was stunning.” WNYC

“Simply astounding to watch and pleasure to the ear.” OperaOnline


ET SHEN YUN take you on a journey through 5,000 years of divinely-inspired culture: A journey where the wisdom of ancient China, the world’s finest classical Chinese dancers, gorgeous hand-crafted costumes, and massive animated backdrops come together in one spectacular performance. Enter a world of heavenly wonder, imperial drama, and heroic legends, a world where beauty and purity have never been lost...




Tickets: $50, $60, $80, $100, $120, $150 Phone: 800-745-3000 Online: www.RBTL.org Information Hotline: 877-519-0905

ShenYun2013.org Presented by Upstate New York Falun Dafa Association

::fashion forward

Unclutter Your Life…And Your Closet!


By Joan E. Lincoln

“Organizing is what you do before you do something, so that when you do it, it is not all mixed up.” - A.A. Milne, creator of Winnie-the-Pooh

size changes can create a collection of garments that hold some positive and perhaps negative memories. The time is now to touch those pieces that will never fit again, purge the negative energy from your wardrobe, make dressing each day an exciting experience not frustrating.  Simplify! Make a strategic move to remove the clutter from your life.    Some of us have work to do from the inside out when we think about On Emotional Clutter: Our baggage of hope, fear, and relationships. how to simplify our lives; others have to address the surroundings You’ve probably heard it a hundred times or more – if you want to in which we live. Inside our homes can be the most stimulating or reduce the stress in your life you need to simplify. This is much easier said than done, of course, and there is no shortage of experts who are draining of environments. happy to tell you exactly how to do it.    On Physical Clutter: Are you hoarding something in your home? Did you know some people are born hoarders? They’re not lazy or stubbornly All of that advice and guidance can quickly become confusing and even attached to their possessions; they may actually be genetically pre- overwhelming – so much for simplifying your life! Emotional clutter disposed to live the life of a pack rat. The impact of possessions on comes in all shapes and sizes. someone’s ability to live comfortably plays a large role in differentiating Your ‘mess’ does not make you a “bad person”. Organizing is about hoarders from collectors. It’s not the number of possessions, or the creating an environment that helps you be your best self. It is all about possessions themselves that differentiates hoarders from collectors’ but freeing up some space. We all collect “stuff” along the way – it is three cognitive and behavioral attributes – perception of value, ability inevitable. Eventually space runs out, though, and our stuff turns into to maintain functionality in living spaces, and expression of pride in clutter that has an impact on our lives – consciously or unconsciously. one’s possessions.  Revamp Your Closet: Get rid of anything you haven’t worn in three Simplify your space by getting rid of one or two things each month that no longer make sense to keep. You’ll be surprised at just how refreshing years. The purging of clothing can be one of the most difficult but one it is to reclaim even a little bit of space. of the most rewarding processes to experience. I make it a rule that       when I invest in new items for my wardrobe that the same number of Ring out the old. Invite in the new. As we say goodbye to one year, we unworn items need to be removed from my closet. Consign, donate can look forward to the hope and possibilities of another one. Every day holds the possibility of a miracle! and re-purpose to make the process more rewarding.  Our collection of clothing and the components of our wardrobe can Joan Lincoln owns Panache Vintage and Finer Consignment in Brighton become staggering if we don’t keep it in control. Our style, lifestyle and Commons. www.joanlincoln.com

january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

Get Your Dance On for Heart Health!

Across the United States and in your community dance, learn simple ways to stay heart healthy, enjoy music and participate in health screenings.

Saturday, February 9, 2013 Noon - 4 p.m. EastView Mall Main Court

FREE Drawings and Giveaways FREE Health Screenings and Heart Health Info FREE Dance Demonstrations and Lessons Ballroom, Jazzercise, Swing, Zumba, R&B Line Dancing and more To schedule a FREE cholesterol/glucose test or to register for a dance demonstration: Call (585) 919-3899 or visit spirit.thompsonhealth.com

Exclusively at your Spirit of Women Hospital Š2012 Spirit Health Group. All rights reserved.

Football Widow Seen in Company of Two Studs...

Smart Woman.


RichardsFineJewelers.com 1855 Monroe Ave. I Brighton Commons at Twelve Corners I 585.242.8777

::leading woman

By Amy Gallo | Photo by Audrey Jacobs

Irondequoit Bay Bridge

It was a hilarious incident involving her young granddaughter that got Mary Ellen Belding, President of Structural Remedial Services (SRS) Construction, to realize how far women have come – and how much further we have to go. “She stepped in dog poop and was freaking out, crying. I told her to calm down and take a paper towel, go outside and wipe it off of her shoe. I go back inside and I hear her singing that new song, ‘What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger,’” Belding recounts, laughing. “It was that interaction that got me thinking about how we need to build children up, support, and encourage them – especially girls. It’s so different today, but those destructive stereotypes are still there.” Belding should know – she struggles with them every day. “It’s two steps forward and one step backwards some days,” she says. “But those two steps forward are always amazing.” Belding and SRS Vice-President Julie Nichols have forged a path for women in an industry that continues to be dominated by men. “This is a non-traditional role for women,” Belding says. “There are so many barriers to women in a male-dominated field,” Nichols adds. But they admit that their gender has also worked to their advantage. “What sets us apart is the fact that we’re women,” says Nichols. “So we automatically stand out.” Belding acknowledges how their experiences as women give them an edge. “We’re multi-taskers – we’ve got husbands, children; we’ve got to go to hockey, music class,” she says. “We do it all!” At the same time, both Nichols and Belding want to make sure that their work speaks for itself. “We want our people to be recognized for our work – the fact that we’re women is just icing on the cake,” Belding says. Nichols adds, “We don’t expect any special treatment. We just get the job done.” And that they have! With a long and varied background in construction, Belding knew that her prior work connections would help her to start her own business – something she had wanted to do for a long time. “About five years ago, we knew that legislation was coming to really enforce the requirements to utilize small minority- and women-owned businesses for projects that were being funded by the federal and state governments,” she says. “It was kind of a now or never feeling.”


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

SRS Construction started in safety and compliance – the majority of Belding’s background and experience – and eventually expanded into field construction. But, according to Belding, it was the support of outside organizations and programs that really helped the company grow. “I know I would not be where I am without them,” she says. “We really believe in surrounding yourself with a support system by becoming involved in community organizations and construction industry organizations.” Belding credits the Rochester chapter of the National Association of Women in Construction (of which Belding is Vice-President and former President, and Nichols is on the board), the Builder’s Exchange of Rochester, and the Urban League of Rochester as their main sources of support. SRS was also chosen as one of only ten companies in the country to be a part of the federal government’s Small Business Association Teaming Pilot Program, which brings small businesses together to bid on larger federal contracts and focus on training. “We just held our first ‘graduation’ from the Pilot Program this past year in the Hungerford building [where the SRS offices are located]. Senator Robach and Congresswoman Louise Slaughter were there – it was a really big deal.” The assistance they’ve received from organizations has also inspired them to give back to the community. “We’re trying to get the word out there to make the community a better place,” says Belding. “When the community thrives, we all thrive.” Originally from the city of Rochester, Belding knew she wanted to make a difference in places that need it most. “It was my goal to get back into the city and to be a part of some of the programs that are available in underdeveloped areas where there are low, low levels of employment,” she says. “You’re either a part of the problem or a part of the fix.” Belding adds, “I want to succeed for everyone in the organization; I want to succeed for every person who walks through the door. It’s not about us and it never has been.” The selfless attitude of these women is reflected in the way SRS conducts business, helps the community – and works for a better future for young girls like Belding’s granddaughter. “We’re sending a message to our kids, to our grandkids,” she says. “You can do anything you put your mind to.”

We strive for excellence in your urgent care experience by providing care in a pleasant, timely manner. Our facilities are staffed with board certified physicians, registered nurses and x-ray technologists, where we can provide patients with a wide range of services tailored to their individual needs. No Appointment Necessary Open 7 Days A Week Most Insurances Accepted Worker’s Comp & No-Fault Welcome Lower Co-Pays Than The Emergency Department Reasonable Self-Pay Rates For Patients Without Insurance We Work With Your Doctor To Ensure Continuity Of Care

Henrietta (Across From The Post Office) 1300 Jefferson Road, Suite 100 Rochester, New York 14623 Phone: 585-413-1800

Pittsford (Pittsford Colony Plaza) 3400 Monroe Avenue Rochester, New York 14618 Phone: 585-203-1055

Buffalo (McKinley Commons Plaza) 4154 McKinley Parkway, Suite 275 Blasdell, New York 14219 Phone: 716-202-1462

Mon-Fri: 10am-8pm Sat-Sun: 10am-7pm

Mon-Fri: 10am-10pm Sat-Sun: 10am-8pm

Mon-Sun: 10am-8pm

::queen of arts

By Amanda Hebing

People want to experience something out of the mundane; we want to laugh at something funny, to cry at something beautiful and be mesmerized by something we don’t see every day. In order to fulfill this void, we have several avenues in which to experience a sense of entertainment. Concert halls, movie theaters, play houses and art galleries are all places in which people congregate to experience something out of the ordinary. A quiet theater sits on East Avenue in our very own Rochester. This local theater has been entertaining since October 17, 1929. With humble beginnings as a quiet cinema to a thriving not-for- profit that showcases local artists and musicians, ‘The Little’ bestows the gift of entertainment through giving back to the community. RWM chatted with Beth Bailey who has been working as management for The Little Theater since 2009. Bailey described The Little as a great place for those who love the arts and are looking to gain more from the movie-going experience. It was also named City Newspaper’s “Number One Best Place to go on a First Date.” There are many programs that the theater offers such as topic discussions on the films presented and programs offered through Writers and Books. The Little is also known for its collaborations with local filmmakers/artists/musicians such as their collaboration with RIT in which they do live performances of the student’s work. George Eastman house also partners with The Little in screening local art films. For younger audiences, The Little presents “Little Buddies” in which G or PG-rated movies and international shorts are shown. The artsy feel of The Little’s nostalgic vibe also draws people to its doors as they are granted experiences in old fashioned movie going. A café can also be found in its halls in which local music can be heard and showcased art can be observed. While offering signature movie popcorn and other such treats, The Little café also gives crowds a taste of home with bakery treats. Bailey explained that many customers come simply to eat at the café for a dinner out. The Little’s tall neon flashing sign and drive-in theater also grant the impression that could make you feel like you have gone back in time. Along with its collaborations with various Rochester organizations, The Little also gives a chance to local artists who are seeking opportunities to showcase their talents at the café’s exhibit hall. Also, for a short run, free screenings are offered for local filmmakers’ work or outside independent films. Bailey advised that any local artist interested in a spot at The Little apply. For any inspiring artists who would like to pitch their work, please contact Derek Reese (for film) and Professor Kathleen Farrell (for art exhibits). Beth Bailey knows this process all too well as she has pitched her own art exhibit and will be displaying her oil paintings in January at The Little. Her exhibit shows illustrations based on pictures that her grandfather took of a cross country trip back in the 1950’s of films being made out West. Located on the East End near the heart of Rochester’s cultural home front, many people think of The Little as a great artistic haven. I asked Bailey about membership numbers, she estimated that The Little serves approximately 1,800-2,000 current members. Those numbers speak volumes, especially in this day and age when movie audience are in significant decline. With advancements in technology, media consumption is something that Bailey feels is a hindrance to sales, but current stats show that as The Little gives back to the community with programs and opportunities for local artists, the community gives back to The Little by keeping it alive for 83 years and counting…


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com


NEW 2013 FIAT 500



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::fab finds

2013 fab

Abundance Cooperative Market It’s true. Abundance Cooperative Market is Rochester’s first and only cooperatively-owned natural products retail grocer. Although they opened to the public in 2001, their history spans more than forty years, beginning with the Genesee Co-op Natural Food store in 1968. They provide shareholders and nonshareholders a friendly meeting place, healthful food, and safe household products at reasonable prices. They give priority to buying local, organic, sustainable, and/or socially responsible products. www.abundance.coop | 62 Marshall St Rochester, NY 14607 | (585) 454-COOP


Natural Oasis

Natural Oasis, aim is to support the health of our local and global community and environment. By providing local and/or organic foods and supplements, as well as wellness services such as Yoga, Massage, and Herbal Medicine. In addition, they create a safe, friendly and comfortable environment that promotes education, meaningful connection, and positive growth of Body-Mind-And Spirit.


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

www.naturaloasisny.com | 288 Monroe Ave | Rochester, NY 14607 | (585) 325-1831

Crossfit Rochester


CrossFit Rochester was the first to bring the training program to the area and is currently the only one to feature a CrossFit Level II Certified coach. So what is CrossFit? It is a strength and conditioning program that works for everyone. The program combines movements that we see in everyday life — squatting, lifting, pressing, running and jumping with variety and intensity to create the most effective means of developing a complete fitness workout. The theory being if you do not stress the body, it has no reason to adapt. Looking to try Crossfit. Call for a free trial workout.


www.crossfitrochester.com 3750 Monroe Ave | Pittsford, NY 14534 | (585) 202-7295

Zumba at RAC for Women

Get your heart racing and your blood pumping as dance your way into shape though Zumba’s energizing combination of dance and aerobics in the New Year. Rochester Athletic Club for Women offers Zumba classes at all of their locations at times to fit every schedule. www.rochesterathletic.com | 3400 Monroe Ave Pittsford, NY 14534 | (585) 899-6666

a healthy new look

You know you want to look better, feel better and be better in 2013 and A Healthy New Look features a complete line of products and services to help you accomplish just that. From Motives beauty products by Loren Ridinger to health and wellness products by nutraMetrix along with weight loss products and a health coach to bring it all together. A Healthy New Look is your one stop to a better you. www.ahealthynewlook.com | (585) 329-9625 | James Jewel,rochesterWomanMag.com Certified Health Coach :: january 2013 19

::for a good cause

By Amy Gallo | Photo by Rocimage.com

To say that Cherise Madigan, 19, has determination would be a great understatement. The Nazareth College Peace and Justice Studies student has been supporting herself financially since she was 16, chats weekly via Skype with an Iraqi feminist, and is the chief executive officer and founder of the non-profit organization The Feminine Alliance (TFA). Yet she makes her ambition and initiative sound so ordinary. “I went online and googled ‘how to start your own non-profit’ and I bought the book Non-Profit Management for Dummies. Then I just filled out the paperwork [to become an official non-profit organization].” But it was her next “ordinary” action that had the greatest impact. “I shot an email to Yanar Mohammed, a feminist activist over in Iraq who runs the Organization of Women’s Freedom in Iraq (OWFI), never thinking she would actually respond,” she says. “She replied within 24 hours and said she would be very interested in working with us.” And this is when the first TFA campaign was born. TFA exists to “support women’s movements worldwide” and already has a presence on three different continents. After chatting with Mohammed, Madigan sends a shipment of aid materials to the network of Baghdad women’s shelters that house Iraqi human trafficking victims each month. TFA has also begun to send lesson plans for empowerment programs to the Tania Center in Kiserian, Kenya, which works with young girls who are victims of child marriage and female genital mutilation. Madigan and a few members of her team are even planning to visit Kenya sometime this winter to implement the lesson plans and meet the girls they’ve worked so hard to empower. “It’s still in the planning stages, as far as money and who’s going,” she says. “But it’s happening!” Madigan also had the opportunity to meet with Jamaican social work professor Dr. Claudette Crawford-Brown in October when she was a featured as a guest lecturer at Nazareth. Crawford-Brown, who spoke on the impact of violence on children and families in Jamaica, wants to work with TFA and the Jamaican government to address the country’s human trafficking problem, as well. “I don’t think anything will happen for a while,” says Madigan. “It’s a really big deal – working with the government – and a lot different from what we’ve done before.” Nevertheless, Madigan is excited to watch the organization grow. “I’ve always wanted to work with women—to empower them,” says Madigan. After attending the 2012 Clinton Global Initiative University in Washington, D.C., a conference that brings together student leaders from college campuses nationwide to discuss solutions to global issues, Madigan realized, “If The Feminine Alliance was going to be as big as I wanted it to be, I couldn’t do it all by myself.” Enter fellow Nazareth students Melanie Beacham as TFA’s media outreach coordinator and Mikella Ackerly as the organization’s awareness campaign coordinator. “I really respect the idea that the organization is not presuming to know what aid and what help the people we support need but instead is engaging in dialogue and providing the assistance and support that they themselves express that they need,” says Ackerly. While Madigan handles the finances and international communication with Mohammed, Beacham and Ackerly are responsible for the Facebook page, as well as awareness in the greater Rochester community. Their recent celebration of the International Day of the Girl-Child utilized the knowledge of the Nazareth’s Women and Gender Studies Program’s Dr. Bailey-Jones and Dr. Shirley Sommers to host girls from thirty different


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

Rochester City School District (RCSD) elementary schools for a day of empowerment and fun. Madigan hopes to continue the local focus and has plans to continue working with the RCSD. “We’re contacting inner-city schools who have the highest teen pregnancy rates and trying to set up mentorship programs with them,” she says. The program would pair RCSD girls with female college students who have similar backgrounds. “We want them to know that they don’t have to start off privileged to get somewhere productive,” she says. Madigan, a former foster care child herself, knows this firsthand. For Madigan, this is her life-long endeavor. “I want to go to Baghdad and work with women hands on.” While her plans to travel to the Iraqi capital this winter have been complicated by the ongoing violent unrest in Syria, the same determination that helped her start The Feminine Alliance remains unwavering as she continues forward. “It might fail; it might not work,” she says. “But I’ll try again with something else. This is definitely what I want to do with the rest of my life.” For more information, visit The Feminine Alliance’s Facebook page or email the TFA team at thefemininealliance@gmail.com.

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::tip for women

By Lorraine Bohonos


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

It is that time of year again - the time to move forward and start making positive changes. The start of a new year is a wonderful time to think about creating a new you. Years ago I reinvented myself without even knowing that I was undertaking a process that would change my life. I cleared out the clutter and began getting myself organized. I prioritized what I wanted out of life and what I needed to do to get there. After that process, I noticed a big change in myself. I was more confident and had a greater understanding of what I wanted. The momentum I gained from getting organized has carried me through to this day. The fact that getting more organized had such a profound, life-changing effect on me is what inspired me to start my own business and help others accomplish the same thing.

used items easily accessible. Your daily tasks will go more smoothly and your living space will be peaceful.

Why not clear out the clutter – both literally and figuratively? First, look at the big picture. What you would like your life to look like? Then take small steps that help you get where you want to be. Begin by introducing the steps into your weekly schedule little by little, and before you know it you will reach your goal. This system will help in many aspects of your life, whether it’s getting more organized or making other positive changes. Here are my top five tips on how to get your life and space organized – and how to keep them that way.

5. Stay In Your Space & Focus. When you are organizing a space, stay in the area in which you are working and stay focused on the task at hand. Do not get sidetracked by running found items to different rooms.  Instead, make piles of things and when you have finished sorting, make one trip to each location to put everything away. 

unwanted and out of date items and any items that you have multiples of. If you are not prepared to let things go, make a “pending bag.” Collect all items in one place and set them aside. Schedule a time to revisit the bag to determine if you really need its contents. After you clear out what you don’t need, you will start enjoying the smaller selection of items that you have handpicked to hold on to.

2. Prioritize. When setting up new systems, be sure to separate

“everyday items” from items you do not use regularly. Keep your most

4. A Place For Everything & Everything In Its Place. Clutter begins when items don’t have a home.  Address the spaces that feel out of control. Assign a permanent “home” for each item in that space. Be as specific as possible when setting this up, and don’t overcrowd your spaces. This will make it easier to follow through on maintenance by always putting things in their easy-to-access place.

::tips forwomen

1. If You Don’t Use It & Don’t Love It You Don’t Need It. Purge all

3. Containerize. Make the most efficient use of your space by keeping like items together in an appropriate container and clearly labeling it.

In 2013 let’s get the mindset from here on out that you will not try, you will do. Use these tips and develop your own custom strategies to make positive changes. You may realize that you need outside help to get you through this process, and you may need to learn new ways of doing things and staying motivated. It can be done. I hope that you experience joy and newfound energy in your day-to-day life after getting organized. I wish everyone the best in 2013. With all my heart I believe that we can all make the changes we want once we set our minds “to do.” Lorraine Bohonos is the owner of Thrive Organizing, www.thriveorganizing.com. Read additional organizing tips from Lorraine on our website www.rochesterwomanmag.com.

Whether your project is personal or professional, big or small, you’ll appreciate our upbeat, positive and non-judgmental approach. (585) 545 1515


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rochesterWomanMag.com :: january 2013


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Dr. Emily Dane-Staples, SJFC 3690 East Avenue, Rochester, NY 14618 or by email to ngwsd@sjfc.edu

Madonna Tomani, MD Sraddha Prativadi, MD Catherine Falcon, NP

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NEWyear NEWyou rochesterWomanMag.com :: january 2013


::RWM makeovers

Pamela Werts, 45 Vice President of Green Living Technologies

What girl doesn’t like dress-up? Pam was a willing volunteer for this Rochester Woman Magazine New Year, New You make-over shoot and said she was ready for just about anything. An active career woman, Pam is married to her best friend Larry who she says makes her laugh every day. They live in Fairport where they enjoy spending time with their beautiful Labrador retriever, Kendall. Kendall just so happens to be the name of her very favorite Chardonnay, too. Hair: Salon Bella Vita owner, Tiffanie Niger, added dark colored extensions to the bottom of Pam’s coppery brown curly hair, while adding highlights to the top to create a striking layered look and adding over six inches of new length. Pam looks stunning in this wrap around black cocktail length form fitting, wraparound dress from Chandeliers that flatters her gorgous full figure and elegant cruves. Accented with a black and silver necklace and bracelet set also from Chandeliers add some high black boots and she’s ready to head out on the town. For a more casual look, Pam donned this flattering grey and black stripped cardigan over her dark colored Miss Me jeans from Chandeliers Boutique. She accented the outfit with a silver and gold necklace and wraparound bracelet from Chic Boutique. Salon Bella Vita is located at 32 South Main Street in the village of Pittsford and offers a relaxing, comfortable place environment to be styled and pampered. Owner, Tiffanie Prota is a certified Redken Hair Color Specialist and instructor and is a true artist when it comes to making you look and feel incredible. Salon Bella Vita features the full line of Redken products as well as Jane Iredale mineral cosmetics. Bring your girlfriends over for her special ladies nights! 28 january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

Holly Roth, 38 Business Banking Regional Mgr. for Citizen’s Bank

The single mom of a 13-year-old daughter, Holly is a career driven woman who enjoys helping small businesses become successful. Her motto: Don’t ever let anyone dull your sparkle. Holly’s resolution for the New Year is to start doing things for herself. She is starting by obtaining a passport and traveling the world! Hair: To create Holly’s look Michelle chose a more textured cut to add layers around her face. The copper undertones, and bright blonde highlights excentuate her beautiful natural coloring. The bold color gives the fresh new cut an exciting look to start off the New Year. Holly looks great in this casual look from Bebe Mills. The grey top features delicate lacework on top, followed with a slimming elastic waste. We paired the dress with a pair of soft jeanlike leggins and finished the look with knee-high black boots. The multi-faceted wrap around bracelet is from Chandeliers. For a dressier look we put Holly in this striking midnight blue taffeta cocktail dress from Chandelier’s Boutique that sets off her beautiful strawberry blonde hair. The dress features a pleated neckline, bow accent at the waste and a fun, flirty poofy hem. BeBe Mills, may have only opened their doors in March in the village of Brockport, but she has already caused quite a stir. Owner Tamara Barrus stocks the shop with hip, funky styles from YA Los Angeles, Funky People, MOGO, Lucky Feather and more. The store also carries a complete selection of lingerie, jewelry, hats and accessories. Be cool. Be contemporary. Be dressed at BeBe Mills. rochesterWomanMag.com :: january 2013


::RWM makeover

Ella Dean, 49 Legislative Aid

“I need a total change!” That was what Ella cried when she arrived at the makeover shoot and Salon Bella Vita came to her rescue! Ella is single mother who enjoys music, art and hiking. She is looking forward to greater peace of mind and more self confidence going into the New Year. With a little help from Rochester Woman Magazine, and her totally hot new look, Ella should be all set in 2013. Hair: Tiffanie began by cutting off the volumes of Ella’s excessively thick, curly coarse hair. Her hair fell to the floor in huge piles, as we watched Ella transform. A splash of copper color was added to the front bang, and then her hair was straightened for a short, sleek new look. It wasn’t long before she was texting photos of the finished look to her friends and family who couldn’t believe it was even her. Ella is warm and cozy in this beautiful layered grey shawl from Chandelier’s over comfortable jeans and tall black boots. Also from Chandelier’s this fun fur purse looks great when paired with this multi-colored tan, off-white and gray shrug especially when it is placed over a form fitting black t-shirt. Add a pair of dark jeans, and a high pair of black boots and you are ready to make a fashion statement any where you go! Chandelier’s Boutique and Accessories is owned and operated by Trish Martin, and offers an array of unique, one of a kind items from local, domestic and international artists and designers. They carry a variety of products from unique clothing, dazzling jewelry and accessories, and even perfumes, and bath and body items. When you shop at Chandeliers, Trish makes it her mission to make sure you receive the best service and the ultimate shopping experience. You will be greeted with a warm, sincere welcome every 30 january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com time you walk in the door.

Valerie Huntley, 27 Full-time Mother of Three

Valerie joined our makeover group with the hopes of getting a new style to start the New Year. Married with three children ages, ten, four and five months, Valerie enjoys spending quality time with her family. Hair: Valerie’s stylist Michelle went for a fun, flirtyhairstyle accented with bright coppery highlights, and a drastically shorter angled cut. Valerie is ready to chase the kids around, or go out with the girls for some fun super cute, belted faux fur vest over a lacey long sleeved form fitting top from Chaneliers. She also has on a sparly bangle and a pair of jeweled MissMe jeans.. For a night on the town with her husband, Valerie looks amazing in this cute little black lace dress paired with a black faux fur wrap with crystal accent. The red hair accent creates the perfect finishing touch. You can fins this ensemble at Chandliers Boutique. The Chic Boutique carries a great selection of fun accessories to compliment any style. They offer quality affordable costume jewelry so anyone can accessorize their wardrobe without breaking the bank. Every product in stock has been thoroughly checked for quality and lives up to their rigid standards. The Chic Boutique is located at 8 West High Street in Shortsville.

rochesterWomanMag.com :: january 2013


::RWM makeovers

Madison Bane, 25 Massage Therapist at Massage Envy Spa

Madison decided she wanted a fresh, new look for her new, wedded lifestyle and new house. Married in April 2012, Madison still enjoys going out for drinks with her girlfriends as well as going to sporting events with her new husband and his friends. She is looking forward to new beginnings in the New Year and advancing her career as a massage therapist. Hair: Madison’s terrific new look starts with the cut—a bob with inverted textures. Then vibrant color was applied to turn her into a striking red head. Her husband didn’t even recognizer her. Madison’s new hairstyle looks great when paired with this red ruffles and lace top from Chandelier’s. It is paired with a black, straight knee length skirt and funky leopard print clutch that matches the red and leopard print sassy hair clip. Heading out for drinks with the girls, this champagne and sparkly cowl neck sweater from Christopher and Banks is perfect paired up with a cute pair of jeans and a big brown leather purse. Chic Boutique accented the outfit with a pearly golden toned pair earings and necklace. Photography for the New Year, New You Makeover were provided by Rob Daniels Photography, www.robdanielsphotos.com


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com


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By Stamatia Destounis MD, FACR

::healthy woman

A mammogram is a well-known screening test for breast cancer detection. Each woman’s breast tissue is visualized with the screening mammogram and viewed either as an x-ray image on film or as a digital image on a computer workstation. Breast density by definition is what type of tissue (fibrous, glandular, or fatty) makes up the content of each woman’s breast. The more fibrous and glandular tissue present, the more dense the breast tissue is and the more challenging the interpretation of the mammogram may be for the radiologist interpreting the study. What does this mean to you? If you have dense breast tissue (confirmed on a mammogram) you must understand that you have the type of tissue that may make it more difficult for some breasts cancers to be detected. This month a mandate goes into effect in New York State that each woman will receive the results of her mammogram along with the results of the type of breast density she has. If she has dense breast tissue a recommendation will be given for her to speak with her primary care physician regarding additional screening tests that may be helpful for early breast cancer detection. Additional tests may include breast ultrasound and or breast MRI. The mandate’s goal is to inform women of their breast density and allow for a discussion between women and their doctors regarding their breast cancer risk, and review factors that may add to their risk of breast cancer. These may include family history of breast cancer, other related cancers, prior breast surgical biopsy history and others. A mammogram that reveals dense breast tissue may limit the ability of the radiologist to interpret the exam and also may make breast self exam and clinical breast exam more challenging. The denser the breast tissue the more difficult it is to identify a breast cancer within it with routine screening tests. By giving this information regarding breast density to each patient the belief is that women will understand some of the limitations of mammography and seek their physician if a lump is found on their breast self exam, or if they have any change from previous self exams, even in the face of a recent normal mammogram. The education and information is meant to empower women and allow them to participate more in their breast care by open discussion with their physicians regarding additional tests and risk factors. Breast ultrasound may be added as an additional test if the mammogram reveals dense breast tissue. Ultrasound may help identify many noncancerous masses such as cysts, fibroid nodules, scar tissue, and these findings if discovered for the first time may be deemed suspicious enough to warrant a needle biopsy or other test to diagnose the nature of the lesion. Breast MRI may be another test ordered in some cases as an additional screening test in specific situations where the woman has a considerable life time risk for breast cancer. Informing women about their breast density may lead to some additional testing such as ultrasound, MRI, needle biopsy and sometimes even surgical biopsy. But it also may identify some breast cancers earlier. The benefit of earlier breast cancer detection may outweigh the risk of additional testing, but only time will tell how big a benefit this may be. An additional benefit may be in allowing women to be informed regarding their breast health. Further information visit www.acr.org or www.areyoudense. org. Stamatia Destounis MD, FACR is principal investigator at Elizabeth Wende Breast Care, www.ewbc.com rochesterWomanMag.com :: january 2013


::cover story

By Caurie Putnam | Photos by Brandon Vick


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

If ever there was a Rochester Woman Magazine cover person who simultaneously shattered traditions and embraced them, it would be Sharon Napier – the dynamo behind the internationally-reaching advertising firm Partners + Napier.

Sharon – who was recently named one of the top 100 Influential Women in Advertising by Advertising Age – has found business success in a non-traditional way: by making the values of Thanksgiving part of the fabric of her company. It was a move some cautioned against, but Sharon, 53, boldly embraced. Where did these values and confidence come from? Pull up a chair at the Napier table to find out… Appetizer: Italian Sausage and Peppers “My father had a very non-traditional past,” said Sharon, of her Dad, the late Alfred DiTullio. “He was born in Italy and came to the United States as an immigrant at age nine.” DiTullio made his journey from Italy to Ellis Island alone – a little boy with huge dreams. He settled in Lockport, New York where he later married Marion Grandchelli DiTullio and had five children in seven years: Alfred, Maria, Sheila, David, and Sharon - the youngest. The DiTullios founded and ran their own beauty supply company, something that taught all of the children much about business at a young age. “My Dad had a really really strong work ethic,” Sharon said. “He taught us to work hard, treat people with respect, that no one is successful on their own and that family is everything.” Growing up, Sharon worked hard at whatever she did, be it helping with the business, school work, or playing basketball – a sport she excelled in. “Sharon is a naturally gifted athlete,” said her sister the Honorable Sheila DiTullio, an Erie County Court Judge and former acting New York State Supreme Court justice. “On the court she was a team player. She was smart and knew the whole court and where everyone was. She played big.” Sharon’s big heart and personality stood out in the large, close-knit Italian family. “Her heart is as big as the ocean,” Judge DiTullio said. “She treats people the way she wants to be treated, but she is intense. Her work ethic is off the charts because his [our fathers] was.” Sharon’s oldest sister Maria DiTullio, an associate professor of psychology at LeMoyne College, likens growing up with her little sister to having both a tornado and a sun in the house. “She had incredible energy,” Dr. DiTullio said. “But the word I always think of when I think of Sharon is ‘shine’ because she has always shone in terms of her personality and her accomplishments.”

“She always took in any wayward creature,” Dr. DiTullio said. “She has a great heart and would always be really bothered if an animal was hurt. She cares deeply.” Dish One: Pasta Sharon took her energy and values imparted to her by her parents to Rochester in 1977 when she matriculated at St. John Fisher College. At Fisher she majored in sociology and management and played basketball and tennis. “Basketball taught me that every single person on a team has a role,” Sharon said. “We can’t all do the same thing. A good team compliments each other.”

::cover story

I met with Sharon at the firm’s headquarters in a historic building in Rochester’s High Falls District the week before Thanksgiving. The timing of our interview was fitting, for Thanksgiving – a holiday so representative of family and tradition - beautifully symbolizes the duality of Partners + Napier’s founder and CEO.

Maria remembers her sister’s fondness for animals growing up.

Judge DiTullio sees much of Sharon’s business success today as similar to how she played college basketball. “Sharon played basketball like she runs her business,” Judge DiTullio said. “She played big and in business she is big. She acts big and she is big, but you would never know that. She’s as humble as they come.” After Sharon graduated from Fisher she worked as a social worker in Seneca County and later for a federally funded project sponsored by the Junior League of Rochester to aid prisoners on work release. That project got her interested in politics and through her work on a campaign for former Monroe County District Attorney Howard Relin, her path crossed with Harold Miltsch, current President and CEO of the marketing firm FireWolf. At the time, Miltsch was the President of a former Rochester marketing firm called The Idea Factory. He encouraged Sharon to pursue a career in marketing/ advertising and she decided to give it a try. “I always tell young people to get involved in things they’re interested in because you never know who you will meet or where it will take you,” Sharon said. Main Course: Turkey, Veggies and Potatoes “In the world of advertising I did everything backwards,” Sharon said. But, backwards has been the way forward for Sharon who never planned a career in advertising or approached it in a typical manner. She started out working at small Rochester agencies, creating a strong name for herself in the industry and earning senior positions. Sharon went back to school in 2002 to earn her master’s degree at RIT at age 45 – not because she “had” to in order to climb the ladder, but because she wanted to. She attributes this desire to always learn new things from her mother, who is still working in the DiTullio’s family business at age 84. “In this industry it’s typically ‘Get your masters and work at a big agency first,’” Sharon said. “I didn’t do that.” In 2004 she and several business partners bought the Wolf Group,

where she was president and CEO at the time and rebranded it Partners + Napier. She lost no clients and saved forty at-risk jobs in the process. rochesterWomanMag.com :: january 2013


“The ‘Partners’ in Partners + Napier comes from partnering with the community, with each other and with our clients,” said Sharon, who nine months ago opened a branch office of Partners + Napier in Manhattan that joins two others in San Francisco and Atlanta. “From day one I wanted to build a nationally recognized agency that was Rochester based, not Rochester bound,” said Sharon, of the recent expansion of the agency to Manhattan. “Having our foot in both Rochester and New York in an incredible balance of being in the epicenter of the industry and in the reality of every day America.” Partnering with her employees is critical to Sharon, who likens the way she runs her business to a family – an approach a former mentor of hers once told her would fail. “Like a family we have values, courage, mutual respect and traditions,” Sharon said. “For all the good and even the challenges we are in this together.” One of the family traditions Sharon brings to her company of 140 employees is an annual breakfast to celebrate the holiday of (of course) Thanksgiving. “Before we eat everyone in the agency goes around and says what they are thankful for,” Sharon said. “It doesn’t matter if it takes 3to 4 hours. We laugh and cry and learn things about each other we didn’t know.” Dessert: Homemade Pies While business has been good to Sharon thanks to lots of hard work, smart decision making, and an unconventional path, the sweetest thing in her life remains her family. “With all of her success she’s never really changed,” Dr. DiTullio said. “Sharon is still her authentic, laughing self. She still makes family the priority.” Sharon is married to Bob Napier, an attorney, and they are the parents to Alexandra (“Ali”), 23 and Carly, 21. They also have a chocolate cocker spaniel puppy named Roxy.


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

“I couldn’t have accomplished what I have if I didn’t have a husband like Bob who was so incredibly supportive,” said Sharon. “And I couldn’t be as good a manager or leader if I wasn’t a parent.” Her girls see their Mom as just as instrumental in their successes. “Even though she was really busy while we were growing up she was really invested in us,” said Carly, who is a senior and basketball player at Trinity College in Connecticut. “She was at every one of my high school basketball games.” Sharon made it a point of always being available at 3 p.m. each school day to take her daughters daily phone calls and often brought them on business trips or to the office. She and Bob, who played basketball at Division I Georgetown, also coached their daughters’ youth and AAU basketball teams for years. “She wore two hats really well,” Carly said. “At home you wouldn’t even know she’s this high powered business woman. She was just there for us.” Ali, who played basketball at Hobart & William Smith and is now pursuing her own career in advertising in New York, thanks her Mom for the path she is on. “I was exposed at a really young age to hard work,” Ali said. “My Mom is successful, but she always had the plan that we need to make it on our own. She has never held my hand and I think that shows what a strong woman she really is because it would have been easier for her to do that.” At the time of the interview, Sharon was excited for the girls to be coming home in a few days for a big Thanksgiving meal at their Pittsford home with the extended DiTullio and Napier families – and so were Ali and Carly. “Thanksgiving at our house is all about family,” Ali said. “And the pasta.”

::cover story


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::in her own words

I lead an extremely busy lifestyle between publishing the magazines, coordinating events, and being a single mom. I usually take the easy way out when it comes to my eating habits, and go with whatever food is the quickest or closest. I told Megan that I was severely lacking energy, and usually wanting to fall asleep at my desk in the afternoon. I had no motivation. She immediately handed me a Spark energy drink. Now, unlike my business partner Barb, I have never had a cup of coffee in my entire life. After drinking the Spark, I immediately noticed a huge rise in my energy level, I wasn’t shaky, and really felt good. At that moment I decided I would give the 24 Day Challenge a try. What can it hurt right? It is only 24 days, so there is an end in sight. I can do this! I ordered all my supplies that day, evendeciding to sign on as a distributor because I was so excited about what Avocare was about, and had to offer. I yelled over the wall to Barb and said, “you are trying this too, what do you want me to order for you?” We drove to the grocery store with our list of what we could have and not have. It took us twice as long to shop, but it felt good having healthy items in my cart when I went to cash out. I was excited to start this new adventure, and if nothing else, start eating a little healthier. When I arrived home and proceeded to tell my 15year old son what I was going to be doing, and started unpacking all the fruits and vegetables, he thought I was crazy. But after he went to his computer and started researching Advocare (as he always does with anything he doesn’t know about), and then tried a packet of Spark, he came back and asked, “when can I start this?” So, I ordered his products and we started the challenge together. Every morning we would get up and weigh ourselves, take our supplements together, and build our routine together. Now, the part I haven’t told you is that my son suffers from severe depression and up until this point was locking himself in his bedroom almost 24 hours a day, not talking to me or anyone else, not going to school, and had such a lack of energy and ambition that he had gained over 50lbs since last year. Fast forward to Day 2 on the Advocare 24 Day Challenge and my son was having hour long conversations with me, cleaning his room, taking his little sister for a walk, eating with the family, acting like a normal 15 year old again. WEll as normal as a fifteen year old can be. This was in just two days on the system. I just couldn’t believe the significant effect that this blend of herbs and vitamins could have on the mind and body. I picked up the phone, called Megan, told her my son’s story, and we both immediately started crying.

By Kelly Breuer I Photo by JulianA GATTO

The Advocare 24 Day Challenge is designed as a jumpstart to your goals. They “challenge” you to become the very best you can be both mentally and physically. So, when I went to meet one of my good friends, Megan Donner, I saw a significant change in her both in appearance, and in her attitude, after just seeing her less than a month before. It was then that I decided it was time for me to start doing something different in my life. Megan introduced me to the Advocare 24 day challenge. She said it is not a diet, but an oil-change for your internal system. Your body needs it with all of the bad things you are putting into it every day. I had tried only one diet in my entire life, at age 40, and it was so drastic and expensive that after two weeks I couldn’t go any further. I couldn’t handle starving all the time, and then not any2013 difference with myself other than the fact that I was miserable all the time. 42noticing january :: rochesterWomanMag.com

I started the challenge to see if it could help me, but what really happened was not in how it affected my life, but my entire family Here I am at the end of the challenge feeling incredible. Probably the best I have felt in years. I have lost 7lbs, dropped 2 pant sizes, and am fitting back into my favorite dress that I couldn’t zip up for two years. And watching my son’s progress, having lost 13lbs, and looking at life a little brighter than before makes me want to cry with sheer joy. All this because of my friend Megan saying, “what can it hurt to just try it…” Now who is up for the challenge for 2013???

::in her own words

By barb mcspadden I Photo by Juliana I’m going to be honest; diets are not my strong suit. Sure, like most of us I could stand to lose a few pounds, make healthier food choices, exercise more, etc., but I’ve never been one to participate in any type of organized diet plan. It’s just not my thing. So when I was approached to try the Advocare 24-Day Challenge, my first response was “No thanks, I’ll pass”. Fiber drinks, herbal supplements, energy drinks and protein shakes just didn’t sound like my cup of tea. After further research and much coaxing by my business partner, I reluctantly agreed to take the 24Day Challenge and relate my experience for this issue. I’m probably the perfect person for this challenge being the world’s biggest diet skeptic, so who better to test this out, right? The Advocare challenge consists of a scientifically formulated combination of vitamins, minerals, micronutrients and proteins that not only help boost your body’s metabolism, but also provide much needed vitamins and minerals that your body can’t get just by eating healthy. These nutrients are combined with healthy food choices that exclude fats, and complex carbs (that’s right no more Big Macs or Snickers bars) to create a plan that is designed to help accelerate your weight loss, increase your energy levels and generally help you feel better. The 24-Day Challenge cost just under $200 and includes everything you need, except food. Unlike other diets, all of your food comes fresh from the grocery store and is not prepackaged or dehydrated. We began by weighing in and taking measurements, so that we could monitor our progress. The hardest thing I’ve had to do in years was step on that scale and look at the number, all I can say is it’s a good thing that scale couldn’t talk! After that traumatic experience, it was time for the before photos. Yikes! I will say the program is very easy to follow, as you are given a complete check list of what to do each day. After the first couple of days you have the routine down and it’s a piece of cake, uh so to speak. The program begins with what they call the cleanse phase. Now I know what you’re thinking, I thought the same thing when I heard the word “cleanse,” but it’s really not bad. The cleanse simply rids the body of all of the impurities that have built up in your system so that when you move on to phase II your body is better prepared to absorb the most nutrients. I will admit, being an avid coffee drinker for more than 30 years, one of the hardest things for me to adjust to during this period was no coffee. Let’s face it, going from a hot cup of black coffee first thing in the morning, to a cold, fruity, sweet tasting energy drink, took some getting used to. Although I don’t get the same kick from Spark that I do from coffee, it did give me some energy to get me through the morning. It will never replace my coffee in the morning, but it’s great for a pick-me-up in the middle of the afternoon. And the fact that it is all natural and sugar free makes it a much better choice than the other energy drinks on the market.

As far as what you eat during the program, it’s mostly common sense, especially if you’ve ever participated in any sort of diet plan before. Your food choices include lean proteins, leafy greens, veggies, fruits and nuts. The program provides you with a complete list of suggested foods and what to stay away from, especially during the cleanse phase. I will say that the 24 days went by very fast and the whole thing was over before I knew it. The Challenge did allow me to accomplish something I had wanted to do for a long time and that’s to lose weight and feel better. I was able to get about halfway to my goal and I am now making better food choices and plan to continue to eat healthy and hopefully to lose a few more pounds. rochesterWomanMag.com :: january 2013



By Becca Even

Happy New Years! Many of us are taking this time to revamp our fitness regimen. We go out and buy new clothing, a new gym membership and many of us start a new diet. There are many things to consider when making these changes that will help to ensure that you aren’t making the same resolution every year. First, I would like to explain that there is no EASY way to get back into shape. It involves scheduling, saying no to the things that we want most, and not allowing ourselves to be influenced by those around us. Changing your entire lifestyle is akin to teaching that old dog new tricks—not impossible, but it does require a certain level of patience and dedication. Here are some game plans for the New Year. The first thing that you need to do is sit down and take a serious look at what your fitness goals are. Are you looking to shape and tone? Are you looking to work on your cardio? Or, maybe you’re trying to fit into your favorite pair of old jeans. Whatever your goal is I strongly suggest standing in front of a mirror and taking a long look at yourself. See what your muscles look like flexed, relaxed. Watch how your body moves when you walk. It is very important that you know what you are starting out with. I have found that keeping a digital journal is a wonderful way to do this—simply pick out a tank top and a pair of shorts and take a picture once a week/month. Whenever you start to feel like progress has slowed you will have the pictures to go back to. Now that you’ve picked out your goal it is time to create a game plan. Choose at least three days a week that you will be able to work out. Try to simplify as much as you can. Schedule your workout before you go to run errands, before or after work, or even on your lunch break or day off. The less convenient it is for you the more likely that you are going to find other things to do. Making your workouts a permanent part of your schedule will work much better for you in the long run. An easy way of doing this is hiring a personal trainer to work you out a couple of times a week, or picking a couple of classes that you look forward to. Do whatever you need to do to keep you coming into the gym. Food. What type of an eater are you? Does stress send you to the refrigerator? Do you overindulge when you are PMSing? Do you tend to gravitate towards starchy foods or sweets? A great way to figure this out is to journal what you eat for a week. Cutting calories is not always the answer as you might be cutting out essential nutrients that your body needs. I usually start by cutting out the extremely unhealthy stuff like Soda, sugary sweets, greasy foods, fried foods etc. After a couple of weeks start to swap out some of your less healthy food items. Desserts turn into fruit salad, juice turns into water, bread into sweet potatoes and butter into olive oil. This allows your body to acclimate to the changes without experiencing cravings. Women tend to lean towards vegetables for a majority of their protein intake. It is important to also get protein from lean meats such as fish (which is great for skin, hair and nails!) and white meat (chicken and turkey.) These will help to build lean muscle and keep you full longer. Being successful is all about maintaining a balance between lifting cardio and diet. Too much or too little of any of these will prevent progress. Be consistent and re-assess every few weeks. Mixing things up every few weeks will help to keep you excited and you’ll continue to see new changes in your body. Don’t forget to take lots of pictures, they never lie.

Becca Even is the Fitness Director for The Rochester Athletic Club, Pittsford


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

::world of women sports By Sarah Jane Clifford

In honor of the announcement that the Wegmans LPGA Championship will be returning to Locust Hill Country Club, June 3-9. 2013, I would like to relay an LPGA story told by famous golf instructor Harvey Penick in his book For All Who Love The Game. It deals with the first golf exhibition given by one of the LPGA’s early stars and one of Penick’s students, Patty Berg. Berg’s First Professional Exhibtion

“Jimmy Demaret and I played with Patty Berg and another woman, whose name is lost in my memory, in Patty’s first professional exhibition match,” Penick wrote. It was a bitter cold day with wind howling, and only a few Eskimos showed up to see the golf. Jimmy and I wanted to call it off. Little Patty said nothing, but her father insisted that we get out there and play as we had promised. Oh, what a dreadful front nine! My hands turned blue. The wind whipped my scarf against my face. Jimmy was having no more fun than I was. Patty marched bravely onward accompanied by her caddie and her father. As we reached the turn, even the Eskimos had gone away. But Patty’s father was very insistent that she not quit, so Jimmy and I trudged with her to the tenth tee box. The tenth was a downhill par four with the wind at our backs. Jimmy hit one solid and nearly drove the green. I was a few yards behind him, and Patty was quite a few more yards behind me, because she had hit her tee ball a glancing blow. My teeth were chattering and my nose was running as I watched Patty addressing her iron shot, with her father urging her to do better. Patty struck her iron. The ball bounced once on the front of the green and then rolled into the hole for an eagle. I picked up my ball and said, ‘Nobody can do it any better than that. Patty, you’re a great player and you’re going to have a fine career.’ Jimmy loudly and sincerely agreed, and we shook hands all around, and then Jimmy and I started walking back to the clubhouse on numb feet. After a minute, Patty and her father came along behind us. I guess he was disappointed that his daughter’s first professional exhibition was incomplete, but I knew Patty would show him wonderful golf for many years to come. If you have information, ideas, comments or suggestions for “World Of Women Sports,” please contact Sarah Jane Clifford at 585/388-8686. Her e-mail is gtc@frontiernet.net. Clifford owns and operates The Gymnastics Training Center of Rochester, Inc., 2051 Fairport Nine Mile Point Rd., Penfield, NY 14526


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

::special feature

By Amanda Hebing

For centuries women have fought for the right to have their voices heard. Though significant progress has been made in the way of equality among the sexes, the battle is not yet won. A leading contender in the topic of interest is award-winning journalist Angela Bonavoglia. She has published two books to date; in one, Ms. Bonavoglia interviewed and accounted for several women who have had experiences with abortions entitled: The Choices We Made: 25 Women and Men Speak Out About Abortion and in the other, Good Catholic Girls: How Women Are Leading the Fight to Change the Church, she observes the hardships and achievements of women in the Catholic faith. Growing up as a devoted catholic, Angela now feels that she is “a Catholic fighting for change in the Church,” She is looking to make a difference in the roles women play in the Church and “in the way the Church treats women, which is as subordinate, second-class citizens.” On October 24, 2012 Bonavoglia delivered a lecture based on her most recent book, at the University of Rochester. Bonavoglia’s presentation revealed the inner workings of the Catholic Church and the role of women in leadership. After having been fortunate enough to attend this most significant event, I stand behind Angela Bonavoglia as a woman advocating change. Bonavoglia’s interest in gender roles within the church began when she was a young girl observing the fact that no women stood present at the altar. To Bonavoglia, this seemed to say “that a woman could only get to God through a man.” She began to research more about the influence of women in the Catholic faith; it seemed that there were many throughout history that had pioneered the way for Catholic women today. Bonavoglia was especially inspired by Sister

Joan Chittister, a nun who said “no” to the Vatican when they tried to silence her from speaking in Ireland on women’s ordination. Bonavoglia began to travel around the country to interview women of the faith and document their stories of the injustices that were occurring in the church. As Bonavoglia ventured, she developed a passion to witness substantial change in the church; she became compelled to do more. Through this process, Bonavoglia began to join forces with other women who were seeking to to put an “end to sexual repression and to the silencing of brilliant Catholic feminist theologians.” Good Catholic Girls tells the stories of different women of the Catholic faith that saw the inequality within the leadership of the church and took a stand, lending a voice to ignite change. The book touches on the topics and areas in the Catholic Church that these passionate women are fighting to change, such as “women’s ordination, the rights of gays and lesbians, and justice for priest sex abuse survivors.” Bonavoglia’s passion has not gone without setbacks. Once Bonavoglia had been asked to speak at a Jesuit church in New Jersey. The Bishop, however, would not allow her to express her views and thus deemed her to be an inappropriate speaking candidate. Through such trials, Angela has continued to speak out on her passion-empowering Catholic women everywhere. In November 2001, Mary Ramerman was ordained at Eastman Theater, making Rochester NY a leading city in the ordination of women. Threethousand people showed up to witness this historical moment. Among the many people who supported Mary Ramerman in her new position at Spiritus Christi was Bonavoglia, who found the experience to be “one of the most moving experiences” of her life. Bonavoglia devotes an entire chapter of her book “Good Catholic Girls” to Ramerman and her story. Everyone has the power to change within. Bonavoglia urges her readers to become part of a progressive movement. She advises others to talk to their church leaders about what they can do to spark more leadership roles for women. For now, she leaves us with a charge: “If you feel passionate about something speak up and write about it, take risks for your passions.” If you would like to learn more about Angela Bonavoglia’s “Good Catholic Girls” book and about how you can help create change within your own church, please visit Bonavoglia’s website: http://www.angelabonavoglia.com. rochesterWomanMag.com :: january 2013


::staging for the new year 48

january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

Information once privy to only real estate and design professionals, the process of home staging is now something everyone knows about – due in part to popular shows like Home & Garden Television’s Designed to Sell and Get it Sold. Kimberly Ferge, a Rochester-based Keller Williams Realty agent and veteran home stager, says that no one had even heard of home staging when she started her business Stage 2 Sell nine years ago. “It wasn’t huge then,” she says. “HGTV was just starting to become popular and the staging shows didn’t come until much later.” Now a full-time real estate agent (who stages all of her clients’ homes for free!), Ferge fell into home staging because of a knack for interior design – and a simple phone call. “My girlfriend, who is an agent, calls me up one day,” she says. “‘I have this horrible property,’ she goes, ‘its’ been sitting on the market for six months, not an offer, nothing – the guy’s decorating ability is Star Wars!” Intrigued, Ferge decided to take a look. “This was before I had any background; I’ve just always been naturally gifted in that area. I went there; I spent one afternoon organizing, de-cluttering, getting rid of the Star Wars paraphernalia. We moved some furniture around, painted, brought in some of our furniture from our own homes, and staged it. We finished on a Saturday, and the very next Sunday, he sold it.” After helping her sister sell her home as well, which included getting rid of a purple wall – “people just can’t see past purple, they just can’t!” says Ferge – Stage 2 Sell was born. “I worked for a lot of other agents and some homeowners, too.” Along with her interior decorating business, Dream Designs, Ferge has staged and decorated hundreds of homes – and has the wealth of knowledge to prove it. A lot of people don’t know what appeals to the masses; what appeals to the market,” she says. “I notice lots of little things that most sellers don’t.” Now focusing mainly on real estate, Ferge believes that being a part of a process that involves anyone’s home is rewarding. “Whether it’s with Dream Designs, Stage 2 Sell, or Keller Williams, I’m dealing with people,” she says. “And when I have those happy tears, when you go into someone’s home that is a disaster area, which can mean that their life is a disaster area, when I go in and help with that and I do something with someone, it’s amazing.” Many of Ferge’s home staging tips can be used to organize and spruce up your home – even if you’re not putting it on the market. Here are some of her favorites: The Eight-Minute Rule

“People don’t like overwhelming projects like cleaning and organizing a whole closet,” says Ferge. “Instead, I suggest using the eight-minute rule. Take eight minutes a day – time yourself to make sure you don’t go over – and grab a trash bag to get rid of things you don’t wear or use anymore. Those eight minutes a day make it seem like it’s not this huge project.” Pick A Room!

“I think if people just cleared out one room in their house, it would make them feel better,” she says. Focusing on just one space simplifies any organization project and can help motivate you to tackle other areas of your home – one room at a time. “Mine is my kitchen,” says Ferge. “My closet is already organized and color-coded, so I’m tackling the kitchen next!” Think Neutral

“People don’t have the ability to come in and see past certain things,” she says. Neutral color schemes, like tans, browns, and creams can help potential buyers see the best qualities and features of any room in your home. And even if you’re not selling, neutral colors still make a fantastic backdrop for any decor and pair well with brighter, bolder accent colors. Do Your Research

“I get some ideas from HGTV shows, but I get most of my ideas from the internet,” she says. “I picture a space in my head, what I’m decorating it for, and then I’ll Google it!” Follow Ferge’s lead and use inspiration from the web to redecorate or reorganize your home. The increasingly popular website Pinterest, a virtual pinboard for fabulous ideas from all over the internet, is a great place to start. Visit www.pinterest.com to create an account. rochesterWomanMag.com :: january 2013


::staging for the new year

By Amy Gallo | Photos by Rome Celli

::local business matters By Ashley Cooper | Photo by ROCImage.com

If you’re like me, you’ve found yourself in multiple situations at social gatherings avoiding the game-table like a plague for fear of looking like the novice that you truly are. There might be what appears to be a riveting round of Texas Hold ‘Em or Three Card Poker taking place and you’re just not confident in enough in your skills to participate, leaving you pining to join in the fun for the remainder of the evening. This is where Janice and Paul Bartz, owners of Upstate Vegas Events, are happy to come to your aid. They have met their pupils at all levels, ensuring that everyone who participates in their games find themselves at ease, able to enjoy their experience, and fashioning lifelong, happy memories. “Sixty percent of people have never played a casino game,” says Janice. “Our most common question at every event is, ‘Can you teach me how to play?’ And our response is always, ‘Of course.’” Janice Bartz had been dazzled by the sights and sounds of the casino at a young age, and entertained visions of one day becoming a successful black jack dealer. “I loved the entertainment aspect of it; it’s very exciting. There was always something happening,” recalls Bartz. It’s not often that individuals have the opportunity to turn their passion into a career; Janice Bartz was one of the few fortunate and determined enough to witness her dreams actualized. She endured the lengthy, certainly tedious at times process of becoming both a craps and blackjack dealer. “It was a four month class and very challenging,” says Bartz. “Playing cards and dealing cards are two very different things.” Bartz eventually served as a dealer for Seneca Gaming Corportation, loving every moment, all the while maintaining her day job as administrative assistant for a New York State judge. After retiring from her position working for the state, Bartz was able to submerge her energies and talents into her longtime vested interest: casinobased entertainment. She also wed close friend of over thirty years Paul Bartz and taught him to deal as well. The couple purchased Upstate Vegas Events from its previous owner in 2008 and have watched it thrive ever since. The Bartzes have a hand in every aspect of their business; patrons can rest assure all inquiries go directly through Paul and Janice. Their active involvement provides for a personal experience for the welfare of event hosts. Every dealer is meticulously evaluated by the Bartzes themselves; they join forces with only the utmost trusted, highly-revered professionals. As individuals of high integrity themselves, the Bartzes will settle for nothing less. It is evident in talking with Janice Bartz that though undertaking a business presents unique and demanding challenges on a regular basis, she is content exactly where she is. “I love what I do,” explains Bartz. “It’s hard to separate the business from everything else-even if I’m on vacation, I will still take a call.”


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

The Bartzes generally attend events that take place on Friday and Saturday nights-all within a 120 mile radius. They are true people’s people-always cherishing the opportunity to meet and greet. The events that Upstate Vegas Events support vastly range in nature; the Bartzes have frequented everything from holiday-themed parties to bar mitzvahs to lofty corporate gatherings. “No two parties are the same,” assures Janice. They truly bring the Vegas flavor to the east coast-and without the cost of gamble. “We play strictly for entertainment purposes,” says Bartz. “And we expand every year. We’re always offering new things.” Today, Janice and Paul Bartz are thriving as they strive to keep their events on the cutting edge of the entertainment industry. Nothing gratifies them more than being able to offer the most innovative, casino-themed experiences with the aid of quality equipment, efficient communication, respected dealers, and trending approaches. While luck has certainly been a lady to the Bartzes, it is unquestionably their fierce work ethic, fiery dedication, and loyalty to clientele that has made Upstate Vegas Events one of the leading entities in Western New York entertainment.

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::RWM reads and writes

By Kristine Bruneau

100 Word Book Reviews offer readers quick and dirty snapshots of books I’ve read. When looking for some background on books that a friend has recommended, I’ve often found myself searching for a brief review other than the promotional copy on the publisher’s website, a three-page dissertation, or a glowing-but-meaningless review from someone who got paid to post a five-star endorsement on amazon.com. Some books create terrific discussions for book clubs, others like memoirs and nonfiction (while wonderful to read) don’t encourage much discussion. Full disclosure: I don’t get paid to read books. I read books because I love to read. If you’re a publisher, agent, or author, you may send me a review copy care of RWM, but it doesn’t guarantee that I will read it or give it a gold star. Category: Award-winning, but not my cup of tea... The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz

Wao is a tragic, epic tale with touching and humorous moments. However, like a stranger who continues talking long after you’ve found him dull, Wao is one insufferable digression after another. Set in New Jersey, the story follows Dominican ghetto nerd Oscar de Leon whose obsession with a family curse leads to his own demise. Gritty and raw, Latina dubbed Wao a “modern fiction masterpiece,” while others gushed about its steady use of “ass” among other colorful expletives. If that’s what it takes for a book to win a Pulitzer Prize and a National Book Circle Award, sign me up. Category: Memoir Running for My Life by Lopez Lomong with Mark Tabb

Running for My Life is a harrowing, triumphant tale of one of Sudan’s “lost boys” whose journey delivers him to upstate New York and eventually to achieve his Olympic dream. Written by U.S. Olympic athlete Lopez Lomong with Mark Tabb, this story is the stuff Hallmark movies are made from. Kidnapped by rebel soldiers at six years old, Lomong escaped death by running across the desert to a refugee camp, where he survived on faith, garbage, and more running. Book proceeds go to Lomong’s foundation, 4 South Sudan. Read it with your kids and be inspired to do some good. Category: Books turned into movies Sarah’s Key by Tatiana de Rosnay

I was drawn into Sarah’s Key from the first few haunting pages. In sparse, unsentimental prose, Tatiana de Rosnay tackled the horrific 1942 roundup of French Jews, alternating past and present with two poignant tales. Ten-year-old Sarah has hidden her little brother in a cupboard with the promise of rescuing him later. While Sarah battles to save him, American journalist Julia Jarmond investigates the iniquitous roundup and uncovers a family secret. In their quests, both face the inevitability of change and the consequences of their choices. Fortunately, a melodramatic end doesn’t spoil this intimate and emotional tale. The Help by Kathryn Stockett

The story, set in Mississippi during the Civil Rights movement, is dominated by three women determined to change attitudes. Tale by tale, the accounts of black maids working for rich, white, Southern families reveal secrets, sacrifices, injustices, compassion, and more. I have no idea what it was like to be a black woman in Mississippi in the 1960s, but after reading this book, I believe I have walked a mile in her shoes. The Help is an important book that reminds us of how far we’ve come, and that we still have a long way to go. For more than two decades, Kristine Bruneau has made a career from writing and communications. Her commentaries, stories, and reviews have appeared in a variety of regional and national publications. She posts regularly to her Mommy Musings blog – a mash-up of commentary, humor, and insights on motherhood, love, and life at kristinebruneau.com.


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

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::a little rwm humor

By Pam Werts

New Year’s resolutions started in Rome. It was when the Romans change the Babylonian calendar start from March to January. January was named after the God Janus. Janus is a two-faced god who looks backwards into the past and forwards into the new. The first resolutions were mostly based on being good to others. By the fourth century these resolutions then evolved to praying and fasting during the Feast of the Circumcision on January 1st. I am sorry, The Feast of the what? Holy cats! What a way to start a New Year. Hopefully the familiar January 1st hangover was not also part of said Circumcision. UGH! The recent most common New Year’s resolution is to resolve to lose weight. Why? Is it because we, as a society, feel we must punish ourselves for the Holiday feasts we have enjoyed? I just don’t get it. And women make up the majority of people making this resolution. Come on, Ladies, we need to turn this around. Why not resolve to start the New Year just liking ourselves? Start the New Year being good to other women? Owning who we are and accepting not only the flaws we have within ourselves and the flaws we see in others. I think it’s time we start making resolutions that not only make sense, but serve a purpose and are easily obtained. Things like, “I resolve to shave my legs even in the winter months”, or “I resolve to clean the microwave at least once a week”. “I will wish GOOD things for the person that just cut me off.”, “I will smile when the person in front of me in line has twenty items in the “Seven Item Express Line.” At the very least, these are common things that I can change in my life and let’s be honest, probably should. Since I am writing this article, I figured I would share some of my own New Year’s resolutions: • I resolve to do one thing a day to make another person smile. • I resolve to not take life so seriously and remember how important laughing is. • I will see challenges as opportunities. • I will increase my “girl time” with my friends because it is valuable and crucial to my happiness. • I will do one thing a month that assists an animal in need. Whatever it is that you decide to try and change about yourself or your life, make sure you remember to support yourself through the process. Change takes time and effort and is so much easier when you do support yourself. Whether you are the type that likes to get dressed up and go out to celebrate New Year’s, or the type that prefers house parties, or, like me, the type that cannot stay up that late anyway, enjoy your night. Eat, drink and be merry, ladies, and be thankful that the next day is NOT The Feast of the Circumcision!


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

Gift-giving greatness.

Generic gifts got you down? Well, wake up your inner gifting genius! I have gift ideas that are anything but blah. Gifts girls adore. Gifts guys gotta have. Any budget. Any occasion. Any time. I’m here to make your life easier. Just ask! Theresa Kusak-Smith Senior Sales Director, Mary Kay 585-746-8563 www.marykay.com/tkusak-smith www.kusak-smith.com


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::rwm pets

By Mark Forrest Patrick

Choosing the appropriate canine companion for your family can be one of the most important decisions you will make for your family pet. In many cases your family pet will live 10-15 years and often the children will leave for college before your pet passes. Having a pet is a life long commitment to the pet.

lessons, where the trainer comes to your location and then there is the board to train. The board to train you leave your pet with the trainer and they train your pet over a week or two. At the completion of the training, you come back to the trainer and you are trained on how to handle and give the cues to your pet. Depending on which program works for you the price can vary by several hundreds of dollars depending on the level When choosing a pet there are some important factors to keep in mind.  of training and the trainer you chose. It is important to shop around and Some of them are allergies, grooming and maintenance, training, size, observe the trainer. Also look into references and ask other dog owners and energy level. Is it a pet or are you looking for a competitor in agility, who they have used. Prior clients are the best references for you. fly ball, etc. Are you interested in your pet being a therapy dog? These are all very important things to consider.   The size and energy level is a critical decision. If you live in an apartment or condo a high energy dog will require several walks and exercise daily.  Is there anyone in your family that has allergies to hair, dust, dander, etc. Puppies are cute and adorable, unfortunately when they get larger they that may become allergic to the pet? If so, it is important to consider a can be difficult to handle. This is when dogs are brought to the shelters hypo-allergenic dog. There are several breeds that are available and can because they are no longer wanted. Our shelters are consistently full in be found on the American Kennel Club website. the Rochester area. The staff at the shelters work tirelessly with the dogs The expense of grooming and maintaining a pet can be costly depending in the shelters to alleviate their anxiety and stress levels. This is important on the breed and if there are health concerns as the pet ages. With to ensure they are adopted in a timely manner and remain healthy. the maintenance, there are veterinary costs that also need to be taken Before you purchase your next family pet, do your research and ask a into consideration. The typical office visit to the veterinarian averages professional for advise. Are you getting the right pet for your family? If $50.00 before any additional tests, vaccinations and examinations are you are getting a puppy, research the breeder. Are you willing to commit performed. Your average grooming appointment for a bath, brush to training and veterinary care? Your family pet is a commitment for life. and dry is $35.00. Some of the specialty breeds that require a cut, conditioning ,etc. may be slightly higher.   Tuxedo’s K9 Training Camp, Inc wishes you and your canine companions a very prosperous and healthy year.  The cost of training, socialization and daycare is critical to a well behaved pet. There are several options available to you. There are the group classes For more information on Tuxedo’s K9 Training Camp, Inc. visit that are the least expensive of the options. There are also private in home www.tuxedosk9.com


january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

Women’s Fit Business Training Series

“Get Your Business In The Greatest Shape” January 17th, 24th & 31st, 2013

Rochester Woman Magazine has paired up with the Institute of Social Entrepreneurship to host a three part “Woman’s Fit Business” training series that is specifically geared at empowering women businesses. Series 1 - Cardio Exercises: Breathe New Life Into Your Business January 17, 2013 I 6:00 - 9:00 p.m. Series 2 - Strength Training & Toning Exercises: Develop Your Winning Ideas For 2013 January 24, 2013 I 6:00 - 9:00 p.m. Series 3 - Stretching Exercises: Securing Resources to Grow Your Business January 31, 2013 I 6:00 - 9:00 p.m. Just bring your goals for 2013 & we will guide you thru the trouble spots that many women businesses face. Please join us for your complimentary instruction guide, incredible door prizes and wine sampling!

For information about this series, contact Kelly Breuer at 585.287.5362 or kelly@rochesterwomanmag.com R O C H E S T E R

WOMAN magazine


institute for social entrepreneurship

7:30-10:30pm At The Strathallen Hotel On Saturday, January 19th, 2013 The Gala will be a black tie event to raise awareness and to help fund cancer research. Pre-sale tickets will be $25 and then $30 at the door on the day of the event. Donations from this event will benefit the James P. Wilmot Cancer Center at the University of Rochester Medical Center.

Purchase Tickets to This Event at www.showclix.com/event/3734401 Make a Donation or Become a Sponsor at http://rally.org/rbac You may also RSVP, make a donation or become a sponsor by contacting Alissa Arena at 585.217.6791 or alissa.arena@gmail.com.

rochester women

Anne Esse

Freelance Graphic Designer By Ashley Cooper

“You can’t use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have.” –Maya Angelou Angelou speaks the truth that Anne Esse lives for… “Has it ever become daunting for you to unremittingly have to devise new ideas, to conceive novel concepts?” asks Rochester Woman Magazine, with insatiable curiosity. “No. It’s what I do for a living,” graciously replies Esse. “If I get enough sleep, exercise, and the occasional Good Luck burger, I can do anything.” Anne Esse does it all. Art director, creative consultant, entrepreneur, graphic designer, freelancer, life coach, professor, mother, risk-taker, motivator, mountain biker-the list is indefinite. While most of us pine for her kind of ingenuity, Esse believes that innovation is in us all and that the only thing the creatively-disgruntled may lack is a force to draw it from them. Esse explains that this notion is especially affirmed when she witnesses her students at Rochester Institute of Technology’s School of Design have their proverbial “aha! moment(s).” In her 20 years of experience, Esse delights in being able to see the potential in others that they will soon see themselves. “It’s like paying back the mentors I had along the way,” the designer explains. You can find Esse’s influence all around Rochester, in all different mediums. She has collaborated with several, equally-as-talented creative-types on a multitude of projects adding to her highlyrevered repertoire. Her output has been featured among such commendable whereabouts as Rochester Ad Federation’s annual ADDY awards, United Way, Junior Achievement, the Cancer Research Institute, and the March for Women’s Rights. Online, Esse has done web work for Hochstein, champion cyclist Leslee Schenk- Trzcinski, Eblacker and Stone, and more! She’s created short films for organizations like the socially-conscious shoe organization Okobos. Esse shares some of the most memorable experiences in her successful career with RWM in fondness: “I traveled alone to China a few years ago to direct a photo shoot for a look book I was creating for a University there. That was a huge adventure on many levels!” Esse recalls. “ I also designed a collection of educational materials for the Rape Crisis Center at our local Planned Parenthood and was so viscerally moved by the experience. It uncovered a desire in me to serve women and girls in need.” Esse has hardly strayed from her roots. “I was always an artist,” says the Syracuse native. (continued on page 62)

rochesterWomanMag.com :: january 2013


:rw inspire

“ One of the greatest rewards are the people who continuously come back to the center .” Mary Whittier

Executive Director, Bivona Child Advocacy Center By Amy Long | Photo by Jenniffer Merida

One in every six children, or 240 a day in the United States, becomes a victim of sexual abuse. Compounding these sobering statistics is an overburdened investigation system that often re-victimizes the child. After working for years with abused children, Mary Whittier, Executive Director of the Bivona Child Advocacy Center, has created a successful, comprehensive organization that helps to alleviate the post traumatic nightmares for hundreds of young victims. Started in 2004, Bivona provides a sanctuary for abused children to receive medical and legal help under one roof. “We provide these services so children are not re-traumatized by having to repeat their story over and over again because they’re being moved from the ER, then from one office to another,” said Whittier. “We work with 21 partnering agencies to provid a safe place for the children. It’s a collaboration in every sense of the word.” Inspired by her mother, a special education teacher, Whittier knew at a young age she wanted to make a difference. As a social worker, she spent years working with severely abused children. She attended a presentation on child advocacy centers and the idea for Bivona was born. In 2012 the organization saw a staggering 1500 children. “In our first year, we thought we would see 250 to 300 children. We saw 525, and every year it goes up.” It’s a “Catch 22” for the organization. While the significant increase of cases is alarming, the work of Whittier and Bivona helps to ensure that these children do not have to feel alone or fall through the cracks. The work can be emotionally difficult and burnout is high. For Whittier however, the immeasurable success of victims who are able to move on thanks to her work and Bivona, helps her to maintain her commitment. One of the greatest rewards, says Whittier, are the people who continuously come back to the center to express how much it changed their lives. “People come back to say ‘thank you’ all the time. One woman who had been raped as a teenager told us how tremendous our services were. She wound up speaking about how incredibly impactful our organization was on her life. Not a week goes by that we don’t receive comments about how caring nurse Betty was, or detective Bob.” In addition to child abuse cases, Bivona opens its doors to adults who never had the support system they needed as abused children. “We’re seeing adult women coming in for treatment for abuse that may have happened years earlier because they found out there is a comfortable place to disclose their pain and get the help they need.” Whittier’s compassion for the welfare of the children that come through the doors transcends the eight-hour workday. “ I feel like I birthed three babies in two and half years. I had my daughter, then Bivona, and my son.” She credits her family and especially her husband for their unwavering support.


With the help of Whittier’s leadership and vision, Bivona has received the highest accreditation for excellence in service from the National Children’s Alliance, and in 2011, Whittier was selected as a finalist for the Greater Rochester Women’s Council 25th Annual ATHENA Award. She was also the first female recipient of the Carl S. Hallauer award from the Rochester Police Department for her extraordinary contribution to the criminal justice system. january 2013 :: rochesterWomanMag.com

(continued on page 62)

::rw inspire

“It’s about getting the words out.. Jenna Fisher and Melissa Hall BOA Editions, LTD

By Maureen Male | Photo by Jenniffer Merida

The BOA name is one that is well-known in Rochester. Founded in 1976 by editor and translator A. Poulin, Jr., BOA has published over 200 books of poetry and poetry-in-translation. The organization has also expanded its publishing repertoire to fiction in 2007, and in 2009, the organization began to publish all their works in both print and electronic format. Most recently, BOA has been the receiver of high acclaim for its publication of The Collected Poems of Lucille Clifton 1965 – 2010. You might not see the name Jenna Fisher or Melissa Hall incorporated into the cover art of one of BOA’s latest works, but these two women are part of a collaborative team that fosters and cultivates works of contemporary literature by aspiring and established authors. Fisher and Hall are part of the three-person team that makes up BOA Editions: Fisher, the associate director of marketing and production and Hall, the development director and office manager. Hall is in charge of the office upkeep—taking care of the bookkeeping and maintaining the budget. She also helps create relationships with new donors as well as maintain those with past donors. In addition, she also writes the grants—approximately ten per year—that also help fund the organization. Fisher plays a major role in marketing for the authors and their titles. She helps create print ads for the books, gets advertisements placed in local magazines, and sends out copies of books to be reviewed. She also helps create in-house promotional material, such as brochures and postcards to be mailed out. One of the biggest projects that Fisher helped bring to fruition is BOA’s new monthly e-newsletter called The BOAhemian. While both have very distinct roles, they both admit that their team is one that focuses on collaboration to get the job done. Being a part of a non-profit organization has been a rewarding experience for both Hall and Fisher. Fisher states that she feels as though her “sense of purpose is greater” working for BOA. Hall who quoted BOA’s mission statement—“fostering readership and appreciation of contemporary literature”—states that this is a mission statement that both strongly believe in, and it is a mission statement that BOA acts upon with vigor. “It’s about getting the words out,” Fisher states. Hall adds, “Their [the authors’] voices are so important.” Both also find that being a part of the small world of independent publishers is much less about the competition and more about the celebration of achievements made by each organization. Hall says that she finds it to be more like a sisterhood rather than a game of King of the Hill. “We congratulate each other,” she states. Hall also states that the organizations often come together to collaborate on ideas—to find out the best practice and get feedback on what they are doing. She admits, “It really helps us to grow.” When asked about their own experience with the new Clifton work, Fisher and Hall looked at each other and exclaimed over one another, “Phenomenal!” “Amazing!” Each recalled their absolute excitement when they found that the New York Times had covered the anthology. (continued on page 62)

rochesterWomanMag.com :: january 2013


anne esse

Mary WhitTier

Jenna Fisher and Melissa Hall (cont)

Esse attended the University at Buffalo, opting to study Communication Design.

While the work is challenging, Whittier sees it as challenging in exciting ways. When asked what she is most proud of there is an emotional moment of silence as she composes her thoughts:

Yet, the most touching review that Fisher and Hall found wasn’t in any newspaper or critical journal. It was a letter from a high school student, who was asked to read eighteen of Lucille Clifton’s poems and write a four-page paper on one of them. The student writes, “Clifton was a strong woman who believed in what she wrote …Although I am only a senior in high school, I want to follow Mrs. Clifton’s example of showing everyone what you believe in.”

::rw inspire


“I knew that I wanted to go into a creative profession, although I didn’t really know what advertising was. I ended up going to UB and loved it! I got into my concentration and really focused on that; I was very happy with it.” Esse then found herself working for “a myriad of different creative places” before deciding it was time to take a leap of faith and become her own boss, a full-time freelancer at Anne Esse, Inc. She couldn’t be more content with her decision. “I am a very fortunate person,” says Esse in gratitude. The ever-inquisitive artist says that she thrives from learning “a little about a lot.” Working from her home-based studios allows Esse to explore her unceasing list of interests. For Esse, no two days are alike and she simply wouldn’t have it any other way. She is most fulfilled by “helping other people solve problems.” Finally, when asked from where she continues to draw her inspiration, Esse replies, “From the struggles and accomplishments of the people in my life. From seeing my daughter overcome what challenges her. And from a juicy issue of Communication Arts.”


“I am proud that we are giving kids a chance, and that we are so successful, and that the kids themselves have told us how we have impacted their lives.”

Clifton’s legacy is one that left an impression on Hall and Fisher, as well. Hall was especially touched by the strong and encouraging relationship that Clifton had with her daughters, which she witnessed at the Poetry Foundation Conference in Chicago, IL. “That relationship has set the bar for me, as a mother” Hall states. Fisher adds, “To see all that she has been able to do, to see all the people she reached and touched inspires me.” Fisher also cites Clifton as an example of a woman who was able to choose the life of a mother and a poet, and she did them well. “I see how she was able to do both,” Fisher states, and it’s a life that Fisher, Hall, and many other women aspire to be in their lives. Luckily for us, Clifton has made that path a tangible possibility.





::wisdom in a traffic jam

By Angella Luyk

Dear Angella, I am a stay at home mom, who has recently re-entered the work force. I hate to admit this, but my clothes are a bit out dated. I would like to buy a whole new wardrobe, but am on a very limited budget. What can I do? - Emilie Dear Emilie, You are not alone. Even women like myself who have been in the work force for years feel the need to update the wardrobe every now and then. With gas prices and just about everything else on the rise however, women have to stretch the family budget further and further. Suddenly there is no money for that new suit for next week’s meeting with a potential client or that all important job interview. With image playing an important role in a first impression, you want to look your best. Consignment shopping is becoming the answer to a lot of problems. You can buy a new business wardrobe for a lot less than one or two suits in a department store. How consignment shopping works is, you bring in your gently used clothes you no longer want, and they sell them for you. When the item is sold, you receive 50% of the sale price. This helps to add money to your budget. If you wish to purchase clothes, you can do so at a deep discount. A suit could run you about $40, with a pair of pants around $10 to $15. Prices will vary depending on the brand and the store. The biggest mistake people make is in assuming they will not find any name brands. Consignment shops tend to only take in the best clothes. They are looking to grow their business as much as you are looking to grow your wardrobe. So they tend to be a little pickier about what they put on their shelves. “I don’t usually consignment shop,” says Vicki James of Stand-OutResults.com. “But was pleasantly surprised when I visited Goodwill a

week ago Saturday looking for items for my Halloween costume. A quick look through the ladies jackets found an Anne Klein, Casual Corner and two Loft jackets all for $7 each. Even my husband was surprised by how much the image of the store had changed from when he was a kid.” There are also stores that you can donate your clothes to and receive tax break. These are thrift stores, and while you can find some great bargains, you do need to look a little harder. They tend to take in a lot more clothes, and prices are less expensive. A suit may cost you around $20, and shirts around $5 to $10. Again prices will vary from store to store. When shopping in a thrift store be sure to examine carefully any garments that you buy. You are looking for stains or holes, with the amount of clothes taken in by these stores; they may not have time to look closely at everything. When you set out to shop, make a list of the clothes you are looking for. In the beginning you want to start with basic colors, so that you can mix and match. Your list should include a pair of black pants, brown and perhaps grey. Look for sweaters and shirts of different colors. You can wear the same pants with different shirts and accessories and no one will be the wiser. Remember to always try on your outfits before you leave the store because with different brands the sizes may not be consistent. Once you have your basic wardrobe, at least two suits, three pairs of pants or skirts, and six to seven blouses, you can continue to shop for more interesting pieces. This will take some time, and you may not always find what you are looking for. Think of it as an adventure. You never know what hidden treasure you will find, but you will always find a great bargain. Have a question for Angella? Send it to Angella@wisdominatrafficjam.com or check out her businesses www.onestoprochester.com or www.wisdominatrafficjam.com rochesterWomanMag.com :: january 2013


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2013 ATHENA Award Luncheon Organization: The Women’s Council (affiliate of The Rochester Business Council) Time: 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. Where: Rochester Riverside Convention Center Website: www.rochesterbusinessalliance.com


Rochester Young Professionals Social Organization: Rochester Young Professionals Time: 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. Where: Quaker Steak and Lube, Gates Website: www.r-y-p.org


womens fit business series Organization: Rochester Woman Magazine Time: 6:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m. Where: 1115 E. Main Street, Door 7, Suite 311 Website: www.rochesterwomanmag.com Cost: Series 1- $89, Series 1 & 2 - $159, Series 1, 2 & 3 - $249


Rochester’s Battle Against Cancer Organization: Rochester Battle Against Cancer Time: 7: 30 p.m. Where: Strathallan Hotel (550 East Avenue, Rochester) Website: www.facebook.com/RochesterBAC


Mendon Ponds Park Winterfest 2013 Organization: Monroe County Parks Department Time: 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. Where: Mendon Ponds Park, Pittsford Website: www.mendonpondswinterfest.org/


Profile for Rochester Woman Magazine

RWM January 2013 Issue  

Our January Issue features Sharon Napier on the cover. Stories include a fabulous makeover for the New Year and more.

RWM January 2013 Issue  

Our January Issue features Sharon Napier on the cover. Stories include a fabulous makeover for the New Year and more.