Riverfront Times - May 2, 2017

MAY 3–9, 2017 I VOLUME 41 I NUMBER 18

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Hearts and

Minds For St. Louis Muslims, surviving the age of Trump requires turning critics into allies — or at least forging a truce

BY DANNY WICENTOWSKI

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MAY 3-9, 2017

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THE LEDE

“It started a couple years ago. I was hiking, and I passed the same bag four times and I got so mad ... ‘Why isn’t anyone picking it up!?’ Then I realized I hadn’t picked it up myself, so how can I complain about other people not doing it if I don’t do it either. Then it kind of snowballed. I started doing these cleanups, and people got interested. We’ve got a good little group now that we’re working on building. It’s been a pretty cool adventure.”

PHOTO BY THEO WELLING

—REBECCA ESLINGER, FOUNDER OF THE NONPROFIT ERASE THE TRACE, PHOTOGRAPHED ON CHEROKEE STREET ON APRIL 30

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TABLE OF CONTENTS FEATURE

12.

Hearts and Minds

For St. Louis Muslims, surviving the age of Trump requires turning critics into allies — or at least forging a truce Written by

DANNY WICENTOWSKI

Cover by

RA2 STUDIO

NEWS

CULTURE

DINING

MUSIC

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23

29

43

The Lede

Calendar

Your friend or neighbor, captured on camera

Seven days worth of great stuff to see and do

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Op-Ed

Film

Danny Wicentowski weighs in on a bad mistake by the PostDispatch’s editorial page director

Robert Hunt enjoys the over-the-top nouvelle cuisine at The Dinner

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Re-entry Dreams

Concordance Academy celebrates its grand opening — and doubles down on some big goals

Galleries

Art on display in St. Louis this week

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A Windfall for Cops

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Side Dish

The executive sous chef at Sardella, Sam Witherspoon, dreamt of working for the DEA

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Food News

Hopcat-St. Louis is bringing “Crack Fries” and 80 taps to the Loop

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First Look

Sara Graham checks out Kaldi’s Coffee at Citygarden

University City eyes a new move to keep cyclists safe from trolley tracks MAY 3-9, 2017

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Sarah Fenske revisits the history of Rich & Charlie’s

Bicycles, Banned?

RIVERFRONT TIMES

Cheryl Baehr tastes the proverbial madeleine at Herbie’s new digs

Oldies

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Play It Again, Miistro

Nick Horn gets to know a 24-yearold rapper with an unusual accompanist: himself

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Asset forfeiture has yielded a sizable payday for Missouri law enforcement agencies, Doyle Murphy reports

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Remembrance of Meals Past

Homespun Shady Bug tbh idk

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Out Every Night

The best concerts in St. Louis every night of the week

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This Just In

This week’s new concert announcements

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MAY 3-9, 2017

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NEWS

[OP-ED]

Smearing Protesters — and Getting the Facts Wrong Written by

DANNY WICENTOWSKI

L

ast week, St. Louis Post-Dispatch editorial page director Tod Robberson affixed his byline to a remarkably bad column — deploying a columnist’s bag of tricks to argue that protesters are hypocritical law-breakers and that acts of civil disobedience enable violence.

The twisting logic and selective memory involved in Robberson’s April 26 op-ed, “There’s no constitutional right to commit mayhem,” quickly drew pushback from state Representative Bruce Franks (D-St. Louis), whose rebuttal was published by the St. Louis American on Friday.

But while Franks took on some big fallacies in Robberson’s argument, he didn’t mention one of Robberson’s grossest errors: namely, the way Robberson tries to use the unrelated death of a Bosnian immigrant to bolster his case. In doing so, the editorial page director doesn’t just accuse black teens of committing a murder that was actually done by a group that included other races.

He also wrongly ties an act that had nothing to do with protests to protesters.

Robberson’s column took as its jumping-off point a quote from Franks, who last month criticized a bill seeking to levy felony charges on protesters who block highways.

Franks objected to the way the proposal was clearly designed to deter citizens’ rights to free speech and protest, noting, “As long as it’s not making everybody else uncomfortable, it’s OK to protest. But the moment when you’re making

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A vigil in Bevo Mill remembered Zemir Begic, who was murdered in December 2014. | DANNY WICENTOWSKI

“As long as it’s not making everybody else uncomfortable, it’s OK to protest.” everybody uncomfortable, or you don’t necessarily see the measurable outcome of said protest, then it’s unlawful or it’s against what’s right.”

Robberson writes, “[Franks] and other protesters seem to want it both ways, they want to advance their cause with showy acts of defiance yet react with outrage at the police response when their civil

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Begic’s death, while tragic, was not a hate crime, police concluded. | DANNY WICENTOWSKI

as well as a piece reporting on the racial makeup of the teens who were arrested. Somehow, the editorial page director missed both stories.

In Robberson’s column, the assortment of handpicked cases, plus Begic’s murder, suggests a pattern: “[O]nce a few individuals decide to escalate protest from the realm of civil disobedience to something more impactful, chaos and tragedy can quickly ensue.

People take their cues from each other. Once an atmosphere of disorder prevails, the law becomes meaningless. Innocent shop owners absorb the financial brunt of vandalism. People get killed.”

To be fair, there are informed arguments to be made about group dynamics and how chaos can spread at the edges of otherwise peaceful protests. But you can’t argue that a protest-linked “atmosphere of disorder” killed Zemir Begic in light of what police and public officials have revealed about the case.

Reached by email Friday, Robberson declined to explain his choice to include Begic’s death in the highlight reel of destruction Representative Bruce Franks (D-St. Louis) fired back at Robberson’s op-ed. | STEVE TRUESDELL allegedly wrought by protests.

However, Robberson did respond to Franks’ April 28 rebuttal. disobedience turns into outright in December 2014, a 32-year-old In his email to RFT, Robberson said Bosnian man was beaten to death that he and Franks “agree on a criminality.”

If Franks and other protesters with a hammer in St. Louis. Four lot on a lot of things” and that he are willing to defend “showy” black teenagers were arrested.” admires Franks’ straightforward The errors are manifold. For approach. protests that disrupt highways, worries Robberson, where do one thing, the teens weren’t even But rather than reflect on the all black — one was identified nuance presented in Franks’ open they draw the line?

“Because,” Robberson warns, by police as white; another was letter, Robberson reached back to “once you rationalize violating the Hispanic. Just as importantly, the complaint he made at the end the law in the name of your cause, the Begic’s murder had nothing to April 26 column, about “the radical do with the Ferguson protests. left’s definition of free speech.” sky’s the limit.”

Robberson bolsters his logic Despite public outcry at the time Speaking about Franks, Robberwith specific examples, starting — the Bosnian community staged son’s email concluded, “I only wish with the burning of the QuikTrip a march and vigil in response others were as welcoming as he after the death of Michael Brown. to Begic’s death — investigators is to those who hold diametrically He cites five separate incidents, ultimately determined that the opposing views. I hope Rep. Franks attempting to link civil disobedi- horrific murder did not constitute continues to use his leadership poa hate crime. ence and wanton violence. sition to guide others who would “There is no evidence that this shout down or seek to intimidate But his argument doesn’t fail only because it ignores the fact was a crime occasioned by the speakers representing the other that peaceful protests were a near- race or ethnicity of the victim,” side of the debate.” daily occurrence in the months Mayor Francis Slay said in a formal If only Robberson could take after Brown’s death. Robberson statement in early December, his own advice. He could use his goes even further — including adding, “Speculation that this leadership as a columnist to guide the horrific murder of 32-year-old attack had anything to do with the others. Instead, he’s only succeeded Zemir Begic in December 2014.

Ferguson protests is absolutely in adding familiar noise — and a As Robberson writes, “Amid unfounded.” Robberson’s own few pretty big errors — to the echo n still-simmering racial tensions paper published the statement, chamber. riverfronttimes.com

Concordance Doubles Down on Re-Entry Goals Written by

DOYLE MURPHY

A

fter more than a decade in prison for robbery, Aaron Adams spent about a week on the outside before he was locked up again.

The 39-year-old says he quarreled with his probation officer and picked up another year. He says he didn’t have a clear plan for life after prison back then.

“I wasn’t focused,” he says now.

“I really didn’t know what I was doing.”

It was completely different when he got another chance last December. Adams was part of the first class of inmates — now former inmates — to enroll in the St. Louis-based Concordance Academy of Leadership. The brainchild of a retired Wells Fargo CEO, the nonprofit begins working with prisoners six months before their release and offers a comprehensive slate of services, including career training and mental health care, for their first year of freedom.

Adams says the program has helped him avoid past mistakes and pitfalls that lead ex-cons to reoffend. He now works for Concordance as a live-in house manager at the program’s residential facility and plans to eventually become a licensed barber. He hopes to own his own shop some day.

“I was just afforded a good opportunity, and I’m taking advantage of it,” he says.

Concordance is a new, highly publicized approach to solving the problem of recidivism. Last week, it celebrated the grand opening of its headquarters in Maryland Heights. The 31,000-square-foot Continued on pg 10

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A Law Enforcement Payday

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controversial program that involves the government seizing cash, land and other property led to a $9 million windfall for Missouri law enforcement agencies in 2016, according to state Auditor Nicole Galloway.

St. Louis County police reaped a $1,022,152 payout — one of the largest amounts in the state — and city cops collected $398,292, according to the report released today by Galloway.

The payments are the local share of assets seized under federal forfeiture laws, which allow the government to take possessions, and even property, believed to have been tied to a crime. That could be a car impounded after a drug dealer’s arrest or maybe a house bought with dirty money from white-collar scam.

The practice of rewarding agencies for seizures with a portion of the proceeds is controversial, because critics say it creates strong incentives for cashstrapped departments to snatch as much money and property as they can.

The Justice Department, however, says seizing the “tools of crime” can cripple criminal organizations, and divvying up the bounty with state and local cops and prosecutors “fosters cooperation” among the differing levels of law enforcement.

When a Drug Enforcement Administration task force populated with a mix of federal and local investigators arrested St. Louis tanning mogul Todd Beckman and four others late last year on kidnapping and assault charges, the indictment included a request to keep two properties, ten guns and four vehicles, including a Ducati Motorcycle and a van emblazoned with a TanCo logo.

That case is still pending.

One of the more famous forfeiture cases in recent years was the seizure of Camp Zoe in 2010. The 330-acre campground hosted outdoor concerts and, authorities say, rampant drug use and selling.

Camp Zoe’s musician owner, Jimmy Tebeau, was eventually sentenced to prison, and prosecutors successfully wrested away his sprawling property.

The federal government later sold the land to the state, which has converted it to Echo Bluff State Park.

State law requires agencies requesting money from the federal forfeiture program have to file reports with the auditor. Galloway says 146 of the state’s 678 potentially eligible agencies filed reports in 2016, seeking payments for investigations they participated in.

— Doyle Murphy 10

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Concordance Leadership Academy celebrated the grand opening of its Maryland Heights headquarters last week. | DOYLE MURPHY

CONCORDANCE Continued from pg 9 facility in an industrial park near -2 0 is freshly renovated with attractive glass-walled offices and a meeting space on the first oor.

A second oor is still under construction.

The idea is to provide a one-stop shop for former inmates, instead of bouncing them across the city and county for services. Rather than going one place for housing assistance, another for ob training and another for legal help, participants can find nearly everything they need within one organi ation — most of it under one roof.

The methods are backed by research, the organi ation says, but the results are still coming in.

Danny udeman, who has spearheaded the pro ect after retiring from ells Fargo, says early indications show they’re going in the right direction. All fourteen men in the initial class, which began last ay, have either landed obs or are reviewing ob offers. “ ’ve never been involved in anything in my entire life that is more fulfilling than doing this work,” udeman says. hris ommers, co-owner of i i eria, has hired two workers from oncordance. He encouraged other business owners to follow his lead. “ e’ve got a couple of the hardest-

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working and most grateful employees in town,” he says. t. ouis ayor yda rewson says she had agreed as an alderwoman to help oncordance as it considered a space in her entral est nd ward before it found its new home in aryland Heights. he remains a supporter. “ t’s very inspiring,” rewson says. oncordance hopes to grow to help 2 0 former inmates every year, and then 1,000. The organi ation expects to open another office in ansas ity, before expanding into four states with an ultimate goal of going nationwide. “ t’ll have a huge economic stimulus by employing one of the most unemployable populations in the country,” udeman says.

The key will be whether the program can produce. The St. Louis Post-Dispatch reported in arch that a second prong of the original oncordance vision, a research partnership with ashington niversity to evaluate the progress, has dissolved. And the remaining program is not cheap — with a cost of 1 ,000 to 20,000 per participant. oncordance has raised about 1 million, udeman says. The city and county of t. ouis along with t. harles ounty chipped in 2 million. But the long-term goal is to show enough success to sign a pay-for-performance contract with the corrections system, a goal that

“It’ll have a huge economic stimulus by employing one of the most unemployable populations in the country.” becomes tricky when considering the easy populism of re ecting services for ex-criminals.

Former issouri enator eff mith, whose legislative career was cut short by a federal conviction, is now executive vice president of community engagement and public policy for oncordance.

He says the organi ation has to make the economic case for funding the program. t’s a whole lot cheaper to follow the oncordance model to redirect ex-cons, about percent of whom return to prison in three to five years, than it is to build another prison, he says.

Drawing inspiration from a quote made by inston hurchill, he says, “This is the most costly way of working with formerly incarcerated people, except for everything else we’ve tried.” n

Loop Eyes Bicycle Ban Written by

SARAH FENSKE

U

niversity ity is considering a plan that would ban bicycles from the Delmar oop — saying that the dangers posed by the trolley are simply too great for cyclists. inan Alpasan, director of public works and parks for the municipality, says the matter was first raised by the citi en-led Traffic ommission, which advises the niversity ity ouncil on matters related to its roadways. The commission seems to have a consensus in favor of the ban, one that he says he shares. “ t’s hard for a bicyclist to know when their bicycle is going to cross the tracks at any given point,” he says. “ eeping an eye on that track in the ground is not always possible.”

But because bicycle tires can easily get pulled into the track, serious inury is a very real possibility, he acknowledges. And, yeah, it’s already happening. “ don’t think it’s viable to have bicycles, vehicles, pedestrians and the trolley all in that narrow stretch of roadway,” Alpasan says. And with an alternate route that runs on nright, parallel to the street, he believes a ban could keep everyone safe.

The niversity ity ouncil has already had its first reading on two ordinances suggested by the Traffic ommission relating to the trolley ne saying that vehicles may not pass a trolley car, and another saying that they cannot obstruct the trolley tracks. Those could pass as early as ay 8, Alpasan says.

A bicycle ban, however, could prove more controversial.

Brent Hugh, executive director of the issouri Bicycle edestrian Federation, was not aware of the possibility of a ban until hearing from the Riverfront Times. But he says he would be staunchly opposed. A ban, he says, “is a completely backwards way to deal with this.”

Hugh acknowledges that the risks posed to cyclists by the trolley tracks are real — one reason Big hark Bicycles pulled out the oop last year. For the last two decades, Hugh says, one of the federation’s main ob ectives has been to remove ob ects from issouri streets that are dangerous to bicycles. f the oop trolley and

the newly installed streetcar line in ansas ity, Hugh says, “These two pro ects have installed more dangerous ob ects right smack in the middle of the street than we’ve removed in twenty years ” till, now that the tracks are here, Hugh says, education is key — letting cyclists know about both alternate routes and the dangers of the tracks.

And for future phases of the track, he believes cyclists’ concerns need to be dealt with more smartly. “ ’ve biked all over an Francisco, and they have tracks everywhere,” he says. “There’s not even one block

that’s as bad for cyclists as a single block of the oop trolley.”

To mitigate the design problems of a track that weaves through already narrow streets, Hugh says, engineers should also look into rubber or compressible inserts that have been shown to work elsewhere. “They should not lay another 100 feet of track down without addressing this situation,” he says. till, Hugh says the last thing the city should want to do is start ticketing cyclists in an area that’s always thrived on bicycle traffic. “ t would be like if Branson established itself

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as a spot for live shows — and then started to close all the theaters because the traffic was too bothersome ” The ban is far from a done deal.

The niversity ity Traffic ommission has referred the matter to the oop Trolley Transportation District for its opinion, Alpasan says. f district members agree, the Traffic ommission will again consider the measure. After that, Alpasan says, it would need to go to ity ouncil for its vote, in hopes of having the matter resolved before trolley cars come online for real this summer.n

MAY 3-9, 2017

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Hearts and

Minds

For St. Louis Muslims, surviving the age of Trump requires turning critics into allies — or at least forging a truce

I

STORY AND PHOTOS BY DANNY WICENTOWSKI

n March 2016, the Missouri chapter of the Council on American-Islamic Relations drew national attention for showing up to the Trump rally in downtown St. Louis with donuts. Instead of joining a protest line, the local Muslims attempted to confront the “America First” crowd with kindness (and high cholesterol), an approach that proved charming, media-savvy and only occasionally tense. “Allah is a pig! Go fuck yourselves,” one man shouted. Most of the others took a donut.

Almost exactly one year later, nine Muslim-Americans, all St. Louisans, show up at CAIR Missouri’s main office in Chesterfield. The time for donuts is over. With Trump elected, and Muslim-majority countries targeted in a series of immigration crackdowns, CAIR and its staff are convinced they need to up the ante. Instead of just earning positive media coverage, they’re seeking a way to truly engage with the people who distrust them. They’re not looking for converts. They just need a truce.

The group assembled at CAIR’s St. Louis headquarters this Thursday have come in response to a call for auditions to join the organization’s team of “Muslim speakers,” a role that will have them speaking not only to classrooms or interfaith conferences, but potentially before

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crowds with little exposure to Islam outside of Fox News. Both secular and religious Muslims are among those auditioning, including a veiled elementary school teacher and a retired engineer who identifies as uslim but who was also baptized, decades ago, as a college student.

The diversity extends to CAIR’s own staff. Chris Caras, the organization’s Islamic education director, is a Peoria-born convert who settled in St. Louis after spending several years studying Islamic legal theory in Saudi Arabia and Malaysia.

Addressing the group, Caras lays out the mission for the new outreach program. “The very first and foremost goal is humanizing Muslims, so that people do not see Muslims like savages or barbarians,” he says.

Driving home his point in sermon-like tones, Caras reminds the group of the stakes at hand, the importance of reaching across the divide at this moment in history. “If you have studied hate and genocide,” he intones, “the heart of enabling these atrocious acts against humanity is dehumanization. That’s why we want to make our presentations personal.”

And what they share tonight is personal, even more so than Caras anticipated. These American Muslims aren’t inexperienced orators or (as he expected) individuals motivated primarily by the power of

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their faith. Instead, they are corporate professionals, doctors and college students. And if defending their intertwined identity as American Muslims means volunteering as unpaid ambassadors for CAIR, they are ready to answer to the call.

Although the people auditioning are instructed to spend five minutes preparing a presentation on a subject chosen by Caras, they’re given free rein to present a persuasive case for why Muslims should be treated as regular Americans, not potential terrorists or agents

of Sharia.

Sandi Bowers approaches the lectern at the front of the room while carrying a squirming infant. Bowers wears a niqab, a full face-veil that shrouds everything but her eyes. The St. Louis-born elementary school teacher has plenty of experience handling a tough audiences: Her day job involves facing classrooms of fourth and fifth graders.

As Muslims, “we need more interactions with people,” Bowers says.

That’s not always easy, as some people are simply intimidated by

her niqab. They presume that any Muslim who looks or dresses like her must be the victim of abuse or subjugation.

“I love answering questions,” Bowers says. “I can break down the idea that all Muslim women are bound by whatever stereotypes they have in their mind. Just the fact that I have a voice, that I’m educated and I have a career could help break those stereotypes.”

Then again, there are times when the situation calls for more aggressive action.

That’s a situation Mohamad Alhalabi raises in his speech. Back in 2003, Alhalabi was working as an engineer and regional director for the Missouri Department of Natural Resources’ division of water protection and soil conservation.

That year, he attended a convention of public water suppliers in pringfield, issouri, convened to discuss the security of the state’s water treatment facilities and the public’s drinking water.

“There was 300 people attending,” says Alhalabi. “I was sitting in the

back listening. I heard, one after the other, speakers standing up and bad-mouthing foreign people. And the message was, don’t hire these people because their goal is to come and poison your water.”

He couldn’t remain on the sidelines.

“I couldn’t take it anymore. I told them I wanted the mic, and I told them was one of the five directors in charge of this whole show. I told them that I’m a Muslim and I have more than 1.2 million people under

Truman State students listen to the remarks of controversial “counterjihadist” pundit Robert Spencer on April 13.

Continued on pg 14

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SAVAGE LOVE THE LEFTOVERS

BY DAN SAVAGE Nancy, the tech-savvy at-risk youth, two gimps, Christ on the cross, the Easter Bunny, two weeping women and the Easter Bunny’s smoking-hot leather master took to the stage at Revolution Hall in Portland, Oregon, for a live taping of the Savage Lovecast on Easter weekend. Audience members submitted their questions on cards (I take my questions like some of you take your men: anonymously) — but we didn’t get to many questions. So I’m going to answer as many of Portland’s questions as I can in this week’s column.

We’ve been sleeping with another couple for three months (first time my BF and I opened our relationship). How do I suggest full penetration with the opposite partner? At this point, we just do oral and that’s the “groove” we’re in.

Only-oral-with-others may be this couple’s preferred groove and the lane they want to stay in. If they’re only up for the “soft swap,” as it’s known in swinging circles, penetration isn’t gonna happen. But you should feel free to ask for what you want — at the very least, you’ll get some long-overdue clarity about their boundaries.

My girlfriend asked me to make out with another guy. Her fantasy. We met a really pretty gay boy at a house party, and so I made out with him. I got hard, and my girlfriend made a huge scene.

She says it was supposed to be for her pleasure, not for mine, and she’s still angry six months later and constantly

questions whether I’m really straight.

(I am!) What do I tell her?

Good-bye.

When do you know if it’s OK to insert your finger in your boyfriend’s butthole?

Without fear of freaking him out?

After you’ve applied lube to your finger and his butthole — which you’re allowed to do only after you’ve asked him if you can insert your finger in his butthole and after he’s consented to having your finger in his butthole.

I want to try anal, but I am scared of getting poop on my partner. Is an enema enough?

Properly administered, an enema should be more than enough. But with anal as with liberal democracy — a good outcome is not guaranteed. Sometimes you do your homework and your prep and everything still comes to shit.

I love my man, but we’re both tops.

What should we do?

Spit-roast very special guest stars if you’re in an open relationship, take turns/one for the team if you’re in a monogamous relationship, explore and enjoy your non-butt-penetrative options.

How do we play around with opening up our relationship as parents of a oneyear-old? We barely have enough time or enough sleep to keep our own relationship juicy.

Play around in theory for now — lots of dirty talk — and put theory into practice after your kid is a toddler and you’ve landed a reliable babysitter.

My girlfriend and I are pretty grossly in love and very affectionate, especially af-

ter we’ve just had sex. Should we make an effort to tone it down a bit around a third we’ve just fucked around with?

Or should we just be ourselves, and if they don’t like it, oh well?

Be yourselves — but make an effort to include your third in those oxytocin-infused displays of postcoital affection.

Unless your third was inconsiderate or creepy during the sex, or is anxious to go immediately after the sex (a sign you may have been inconsiderate or creepy), your third helped get you to that blissed-out state and deserves to bask a bit in the afterglow too.

Does the toe make a good substitute for the penis?

No. I have large breasts. My partners are either like, “YAY BOOOOBS!” or they ignore my breasts entirely. What is it with that? How do I get people to interact with my breasts like they’re another nice body part and not a bizarre thing?

By using your words. If there was a way you didn’t like to be kissed, presumably you would speak up rather than endure lousy kisses. Same applies here: “I have big boobs, and they’re great, and I love them — but ‘YAY BOOOOBS!’ makes me feel like I’m only my tits, which isn’t a nice feeling. That said, I don’t want my boobs ignored, either. The sweet spot really isn’t that hard to hit — enjoy my boobs like you would any other nice body part.” That said, some people really, really like big boobs and it’s going to be hard for them to contain their excitement. “YAY BOOOOBS” could be an understandable and forgivable first reaction on their part and an opening that allows you to have a conversation about bod-

53

ies, consideration, and consent.

Tell my boyfriend to go down on me!

If your boyfriend won’t go down on you unless some fag advice columnist tells him to — if his girlfriend asking isn’t good enough — then it’s you I want to order around (break up with him!), not your boyfriend.

My boyfriend is ten years older than me.

Also, he’s the first boyfriend I’ve had in ten years. I’m used to being single — and while he is great (sexy, amazing, smart), I feel like I’m losing parts of myself. I’m not doing the stuff my prior loneliness made it easy for me to do, creative stuff like open-mic nights. Do we break up?

You’re no longer lonely — you’ve got a boyfriend now — but you still need time alone. Even if you live together, you don’t have to spend every waking/ non-work hour with your boyfriend — it’s not healthy to spend every waking/ non-work hour with your significant other. But instead of heading to openmic night because you’re lonely and bored and have nothing else to do, now you’re going to go to that openmic night (and go alone) because you enjoy it, you need the creative outlet, and it’s healthy for a couple to have time apart.

Thank you, Dan. Five years ago, I was miserable in a sexless marriage. Tonight I’m here with my fabulous boyfriend and my hot sub. Thanks to your advice!

You’re welcome!

Listen to Dan’s podcast at savagelovecast.com. mail@savagelove.net @fakedansavage on Twitter ITMFA.org

STREAK’S CORNER • by Bob Stretch

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Just after 4 p.m. on March 26 at the Dar-Al-Jalal Islamic Center in Hazelwood, visitors are greeted at the door by a smiling member of the mosque, then ushered toward the ornately carpeted central prayer room. Inside (and shoeless), they gather around yed as he ips through the pages of an Arabic Koran and explains the meaning behind the ornate text.

Watching from behind a dozen or so visitors is a red-headed 21-year-old wearing a smart gray blazer and black trousers. Aside from the subdued color palette of his ensemble, he looks like a Young Republican. And in a lot of ways, the crisply dressed, fast-talking Eli Karabell really is the perfect Republican. Too perfect, perhaps.

As Syed wraps up his presentation on the Koran’s distinctive text, Karabell introduces himself to the group.

“Hello, my name is brother Eli,” he says. “I’m a Republican Party official, and one thing I want to

say is that in the Koran, there are different letters for Allah —” his next words are a uent stream of Arabic. Returning to English, he offers a quick explanation about the particular blessings a Muslim is supposed to say after uttering the name of God. Syed takes Karabell’s interjection in stride. “Yes, Brother Eli is one of our good friends. He helped us organize this event and he really helped us outreach to different people within the Republican Party.”

As the group moves to the second oor — where the speeches will be delivered, and afterwards, a giant buffet dinner — Karabell lingers to chat with one of the Republican visitors. The clean-cut young man explains that, while he was raised Jewish, he converted to Islam two years ago and recently joined the Republican arty in an official capacity, as the seventeenth ward committeeman in the party’s St. Louis City Central Committee.

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HEARTS AND MINDS Continued from pg 15 Karabell isn’t shy about wearing both his religion and politics on his sleeve. “We need a counterpart to the Democrats in the city,” he says, and throws in a plug for the no-chance-in-hell Republican challenger to Democratic mayoral nominee Lyda Krewson, Andrew Jones: “He has a lot of support in the Muslim community.” n the second oor, a banquet hall is lined with folding chairs and stations where the visitors cycle between presentations on Islamic religious practices and a rack holding traditional Muslim garb.

A handful try on traditional Islamic robes and headscarves, and take pictures with the CAIR staff. A table bears stacks of pamphlets on various Islamic topics — “Women’s rights in Islam,” “The Hijab,” “Jesus in Islam” — and another holds rows of prepackaged “Islam 101” kits with Korans for guests take home.

The outsiders are mostly dressed in their Sunday best. Which is fitting, as most of them are here with church groups. But for an event dubbed “Make America Whole Again,” it’s hard to gauge whether any of these folks are actual Trump supporters.

In fact, as becomes clear over the course of the event, this audience is mostly choir. Of 100-plus people in attendance, about half are local Muslims, and the remainder comprises several dozen open-minded churchgoers, none of whom are openly declaring their love of the president.

After remarks by Syed and his brother-in-law, a former U.S. Marine who now sits on the mosque’s board of directors, Karabell takes his place before the lectern. The redheaded Muslim convert has been given top billing. He also might be the only authentic Trump supporter in the room.

“I want everyone to know that I supported President Trump,” Karabell tells the dead-silent crowd. He immediately launches into what sounds like a campaign speech, albeit one delivered from a reality in which President Trump “supports the Muslim ummah.”

At one point, Karabell seems to transition completely into a stump speech, declaring to the audience that he dreams of becoming the first uslim president of the nited States. But before that can happen, he says Muslims have to act — and that means supporting the Republican platform.

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Eli Karabell, far left, a St. Louis city GOP committeeman, said he was dismayed that not a single outspoken Trump supporter attended CAIRMissouri’s open house.

“We must as a community support the Republican Party and help them in their efforts,” Karabell says. If he notices that his audience appears to be squirming in their seats, he doesn’t show it. He ends the speech by calling for more Muslims to run for positions in the Republican Party — not to reform it, but to join its mission of defeating Democrats and progressives.

“The president will continue to support Muslims,” Karabell says, concluding his remarks.

Finally, it seems like the young GOP committeeman notices that something is amiss, because he repeats himself, emphasizing his certainty. “I know, and I can assure you,” he says, “that he’s for uslims.” He finishes by thanking Syed. The crowd claps politely.

After Karabell comes Chris Caras, and then two of CAIR’s newly appointed “Muslim Speakers,” Sandi Bowers and Mohamad Alhalabi.

(The people auditioning proved so polished, all nine made the cut, though only Alhalabi and Bowers are speaking tonight.) The school teacher and engineer deliver speeches generally similar to their audition remarks, but it’s no easy feat to follow a Muslim-convert-Republican-official insisting to a uslim audience that President Trump is really on their side, despite all evidence to the contrary. Karabell has effectively sucked the air from the room As Bowers speaks, Karabell is fol-

MAY 3-9, 2017

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lowed into the hallway by a line of audience members seeking to rebut his talking points. For the next two hours the young official finds himself being grilled on how, exactly, President Trump’s statements about how “Islam hates us,” or his policies to ban travel and immigration, could be presented as “supporting Muslims.”

This is not the scenario Karabell envisioned when he received CAIR’s open house invitation. During a brief respite from critics of his presidential role model, Karabell fumes to a reporter that Syed and CAIR “ambushed” him.

“I came thinking that Trump’s supporters are coming in to hear about why Muslims want to be involved, why Muslims want to work with them. And then I find out they’re all for Bernie Sanders,” he says.

Karabell seems almost distraught, suggesting that CAIR and the Democrats planned the event as an “op” to shame Republicans, not reach out to them. It must have been a set up.

“This was supposed to be for Trump supporters,” he says sorrowfully. “Did you see anybody here wearing a ‘Make America Great Again’ hat?”

He’s right. There are none.

Karabell isn’t the only one who noticed the disparity. The next day, the Post-Dispatch bears the headline, “Mosque invites Trump supporters to open house, but few takers.”

F

aizan Syed doesn’t have much time to counter with the bad press or engage with Karabell’s complaints. He may have drawn mostly sympathetic ears to CAIR’s open house — but just a few weeks later, he sees a chance to engage with a more outspoken critic.

Robert Spencer calls himself a “counter-jihadist.” A best-selling author, blogger and occasional Fox News pundit, Spencer’s views on Islam — particularly his campaign to stop the “Islamization of America” — contend the Koran and its teachings are aimed at violence and domination. In the Trump administration, that’s not a fringe view. When Steve Bannon was still a radio host and not one of the president’s key advisors, he called Spencer “one of the top two or three experts in the world on this great war we are fighting against fundamental Islam.”

Two weeks after the CAIR open house, news breaks that a chapter of Young Republicans at Truman State University is hosting a speech by Spencer on April 13. The Muslim Student Association and its allies raise a ruckus, gathering hundreds of signatures seeking to cancel the event. The university, in response, scrambles to negotiate a compromise and avoid a contentious public protest.

Faizan Syed is that compromise.

On his website, jihadwatch.com, Continued on pg 18

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Spencer writes that attempts to silence him only prove his opponents are the modern-day incarnation of (yes, of course) Nazis. He also has a message for Syed.

“I’ll be at Truman State University today anyway,” Spencer writes in an April 13 blog post, “facing down the fascists, unless the university cancels my event at the last minute. That is, however, unlikely, as university administrators have already attempted to appease the Left-fascists by scheduling a lecture

by Faizan Syed of the Hamas-linked Council on American-Islamic Relations, right before mine.”

Spencer adds that he expects Syed’s speech to be a collection of “deceptions, distortions, halftruths, and ad hominem attacks against me.”

(Spencer’s attempt to link CAIR to Hamas, the militant Palestinian group that governs the Gaza strip and is considered a terrorist organization by the U.S., is based on decades-old conspiracy theories that the national CAIR website devotes pages to definitively debunking.

After a three and a half hours of driving, Syed arrives in Kirksville, Missouri, and faces 220 students in the largest auditorium on campus. olice officers and campus security stand guard at the auditorium’s entrances, and attendees are screened with a metal detector.

Kirksville is a quiet college town, and the campus’ collection of brick buildings lies within a few blocks of student apartments and a small downtown strip. It’s not a place that’s used to playing host to controversy. ven here, though, yed finds supporters: An entire side of the room is occupied by students wearing white, a planned show of solidarity against Spencer.

This will not be a head-to-head debate. A faculty member explains that Syed will talk for 45 minutes and take questions, and then Spencer will do the same. But before Syed addresses the students, he turns on his phone and starts a livestream.

“Hello everybody,” he says, looming over the screen. “I’m here at Truman State University about to give a talk before Robert Spencer, notorious anti-Muslim bigot and racist against Muslims.”

Syed pans the screen to the security guards and local police officers at the auditorium’s rear.

The department is reacting to re-

Before his speech at Truman State, Robert Spencer lashed out at the “left fascists” who oppose his views on Islam.

ports of threats on social media, for which both sides claim the other is at fault.

After a formal introduction, Syed begins his speech with a melodic Arabic prayer that dips in and out of the language’s distinctive guttural vowels. He transitions without pause to English as photos of uslims ash on a pro ection screen.

“Muslims speak every language in the world, they are from every country in the world, they represent every ethnicity in the world and they are part of every single community on the face of this planet,” he says. He spends the next twenty minutes making his own introduction.

When he was four years old, Syed emigrated from Lahore, Pakistan, to Kirkwood with his family.

In 2011, at age 23, he became the youngest person ever appointed as executive director of a CAIR chapter.

Syed took over rebuilding the organization’s latent civil rights and outreach missions in St. Louis and Missouri, and that same year he led a delegation of Muslims to assist in rebuilding tornado-ravaged Joplin, where dozens of newly homeless residents had found

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One year later, Syed tells the crowd, “a man came and threw a Molotov cocktail at the building.

The fire department got there in time and put the fire out.”

Weeks after that, in the midst of Ramadan, a homeless Iraq War veteran finished the ob, burning down Joplin’s Islamic Center. The man, Jedediah Stout, was later convicted of arson after he tried tossing a Molotov cocktail at Joplin’s Planned Parenthood facility.

Americans, Syed continues, should fight the temptation to live in fear of a version of Islam that only exists in the minds of extremists. Part of Syed’s argument is that Spencer’s version of Islam is just as unhinged as the bloodthirsty edicts raised by terrorists in the Muslim world.

“Are there Muslims who use Islam as a way to justify their improper acts? Yes, there is. What kind of idiot says, ‘No there isn’t’?”

Syed says. “They exist in places that apparently don’t have the best political governments in the world.

They exist in places the U.S. has bombed and invaded, and they exist in a place that has a void of central government and leaderships.”

Understanding that terrorism is

a reaction to “anarchy and chaos,” he says, and not an essential function of a single religion — this is the point he so desperately wants Trump supporters to accept.

“The question we have to ask ourselves is, are Muslims human beings — or are Muslims something else?”

But even before Spencer’s turn at the mic, it’s clear that Syed’s question about humanity could be complicated by interpretation.

During the Q&A session that follows Syed’s remarks, a middle-aged man sitting near the front row asks Syed about a verse in Koran that, he says, instructs Muslims to deceive non-believers. Apparently, the verse even describes Allah as “the greatest deceiver of all.”

The man asks, “Now, how are we as non-believers supposed to know what we’re hearing from a believer, whether it’s true or not?”

The CAIR director, who actually can read and speak Arabic, immediately looks up the verse on his smartphone and disputes the translation — Syed reads his version aloud as “Allah is the best of planners” — but a man in the audience seems unconvinced. He asks Syed to explain a different verse Continued on pg 20

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CAIR-Missouri executive director Faizan Syed says Muslims must do more to reach Trump supporters. But, he says, the GOP needs to abandon its “Islamophobic narrative.”

HEARTS AND MINDS Continued from pg 19 that concerns whether Muslims are permitted to befriend nonbelievers.

This too, Syed says, is a blatant misunderstanding, or at least a mistranslation, of the words in the Koran.

This is the “something else,” Syed was referring to: The worry that Islam is a religion of unique corruption, or a source of hidden conquest whose true adherents follow a blueprint of violence. For people convinced of that, donuts won’t help. Nor will Syed’s smooth presentation.

The audience member’s stubborn questioning echoes the argument Spencer spends the next 40 minutes making. Though Spencer’s version features a blizzard of statistics, names and historical proofs derived from events centuries apart, it all funnels back to this suspicion: Maybe some Muslims say Islam is good, but what if they really secretly believe something else?

Spencer’s other main point, which comprises most of his early remarks, amounts to lashing out at 20

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those who tried to get his speech canceled. He doesn’t call them Nazis, settling for a more academic-sounding put-down.

“Any analysis of the motivating ideology of the jihad terrorists is all too often consigned to the realms of racism and bigotry,” Spencer says. “The suppression is actively deleterious to the ability of free nations and free individuals to oppose and resist that terrorism.”

Spencer spends a few minutes scoffing at yed’s statements about how Spencer is part of the “Islamophobia industry.” Yet even Spencer seems to acknowledge that Muslims do face additional scrutiny for their beliefs.

“In reality, if there is any unjustified suspicion of Islam among any non-Muslims, Americans or non-Americans, then it is the result of terrorist attacks,” Spencer says.

“It was not I who did this.”

Around three-fourths of the audience appears to be in open opposition to Spencer, and so his attempts at funny asides or self-depreciation are met with a brittle silence. But there are a few red “Make America Great Again”

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hats nodding along with Spencer’s speech, plus a dozen or so members of the College Republicans.

One hat is worn by Andrew Egan, a freshman computer science student at Truman.

He calls Syed’s speech “amazing,” yet says that the issues of Islam and extremism that were supposed to take center stage became so bogged down in personal jabs and ambiguous sources that both presentations left him unsatisfied and unmoved.

“I think they’re both reading into each other incorrectly,” he says of Syed and Spencer. “They’re reading only into the harshest and the meanest parts of their arguments, and that’s what they’re trying to attack. I don’t think they realize that they both agree that not every single Muslim is violent.”

Another student, a first-year named Sydney Shank, admits that she attended “because of the controversy,” and that she’d been hoping to learn more about the issues before picking a side.

“What mainly stood out to me was they seemed to be talking circles around each other,” she says.

“None of the facts seemed to align.”

“I don’t think they realize that they both agree that not every single Muslim is violent.”

F

our days after the Truman s h o w d o w n , Sy e d s i t s behind a desk in a back room of CAIR’s St. Louis office.

The three-button suit he wore to both the open house and speech at Truman State has been replaced with a faded black t-shirt from his own college days; it bears a logo of the St. Louis chapter of the Muslim Students of America, a mosque outlined against the Gateway Arch.

It’s an image that might worry a person whose primary source of knowledge about Islam is Robert Spencer. Syed doesn’t let that possibility bother him.

“My goal isn’t to change every single person’s understanding of Islam; that’s not my job,” he says.

And anyway, he has more important things to worry about. hie y, while the A R director chafes at the Post-Dispatch’s coverage of the “Make America Whole Again” open house — apparently, the presence of several additional Trump supporters went unreported — he says it shows just how important it will be to meet Republicans and Trump supporters where they are. To do so, he says, CAIR needs to create partnerships with local Republicans. He wants the Missouri chapter and its new Muslim speakers to do more to interact with Young Republican groups and other similarly minded committees.

At the same time, Syed maintains the Republican Party must give up its intolerance of immigrants and its “Islamophobic narrative” — not just because it’s the right thing to do, Syed says, but politically speaking, he believes the party needs to broaden its appeal to survive in the long term.

What that future Republican Party would look like, Syed can’t say, but it probably won’t look like Karabell’s vision of red hats mixed with hijabs in a north county mosque. And regardless, it doesn’t look like Karabell will be working with CAIR anytime soon. In the aftermath of the open house, the young GOP committeeman tweeted a demand to “all of my Muslim Brothers & Sisters” to boycott CAIR “for not fairly [representing] American Muslims.”

Syed brushes it off. “ li is definitely in the Republican Party, but he’s not a representative of the Muslim community,” he says.

In addition to Karabell, state committeeman Robert Vroman attended the open house on March 26, the only other Republican official to do so. till, roman is a self-described libertarian who favors the economic advantages provided by immigrants and is gung-ho for open borders — not a popular view in today’s Republican Party.

But some local GOP representatives are also chafing at the Post-Dispatch narrative. They know that appearing close-minded is a bad look. They say it’s not their fault they didn’t show.

Committeeman Mark Comfort says he spoke by phone with Syed just days before the Sunday marked for CAIR’s open house. In

his telling, the scant attendance at the event lies not in Republican disinterest in Muslims, but miscommunication.

According to Comfort, he concluded the phone call with Syed under the impression that CAIR would reschedule the open house, allowing for a stronger showing from St. Louis County’s large Republican committee.

“I thought they weren’t going to go ahead with the event, and then we got our butts blasted in the Post for having such a poor showing,” Comfort says. The Republican Party, he insists, is committed to

serving all Americans, including CAIR and American Muslims.

But when presented with Syed’s request for an active rejection of Islamophobia, Comfort recoils. The party official refuses to validate any accusation, even implied, that the Republican Party has an Islamophobia problem.

It’s a strange parallel: Even as yed believes his fight is with those who imbue hidden meaning and see divinely commanded deception within Muslims’ utterances, Comfort is equally certain that those who accuse Trump or modern-day Republicans of racism are doing

the same thing.

“We don’t feel a need to become more open,” Comfort says. “We respect the president and appreciate that he’s taking action to protect us and enforcing the law. We aren’t people who listen to his speeches and go, ‘Oh look, secret racist wording.’ And all the excuses of [claiming Trump ran] some kind of horrible, racist, xenophobic campaign — we listen to the same speeches and we hear patriotism and protection of citizens.”

Comfort pauses, and adds, “But Faizan, he seems like a really nice guy and out to do good things.” n

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RIVERFRONT TIMES

MAY 3-9, 2017

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CALENDAR

23

W E E K O F M AY 4 - 1 0

THURSDAY 05/04 The Flying Dutchman The Flying Dutchman rises from the depths of the sea to invade Powell Hall. Not literally, but musically. Richard Wagner’s opera closes out the St. Louis Symphony Orchestra’s current season. It’s a melodic tale of the Dutchman, a sailor condemned to an eternity of ghostly wandering for the sin of blasphemy. Every seven years he’s allowed to visit land for a short time if he can find true love during his respite, he’ll be freed from his curse. Fate throws into his path a ship bearing Senta, a woman fascinated by the legend of the Dutchman. The tale is a passionate one, with music as grand and vast as the sea itself. Bass-baritone Alan Held and soprano Marjorie Owens play the leads, and visual artist S. Katy Tucker provides the innovative lighting that eshes out the story. The Flying Dutchman is performed at 8 p.m. Thursday and Saturday (May 4 and 6) at Powell Hall (718 North Grand Boulevard; www.slso.org). Tickets are $25 to $111.

—Bill Loellke

FRIDAY 05/05 St. Louis Microfest The St. Louis Microfest is back for a macro-sized celebration of beer, live music and food. Participants will sample national and local craft beers over two days in three different sessions. More than 60 breweries take part, among them chla y, ark Twain Brewing o., Six Mile Bridge and Boulevard Brewing ompany. Food options including Bogart’s Smoke House, the Dam and Mission Taco Joint will be there to satisfy your needs. And what would a festival be without music Boogie hyld, the Bottoms Up Blues Gang, Tommy Halloran’s Guerrilla Swing, Ahna Schoenhoff, and Jon Bonham and Friends have all signed on to play. rofits go to

The Jolly Flatboatmen are thrilled that the St. Louis Fine Print Fair is back. | GEORGE CALEB BINGHAM

ift for ife ym, the non-profit gym that gives under-served youth a place to strengthen their bodies and minds. St. Louis Microfest takes place in the lower Muny parking lot in Forest Park (www. stlmicrofest.org). Session one runs from 6 to 10 p.m. Friday, May 5.

The second and third sessions are on Saturday, May 6, and last from 1 to 5 p.m. and again from 6 to 10 p.m. Tickets are $42 to $77, and include a commemorative tasting glass and access to the Demo Tent.

Designated drivers get in for free.

—Bill Loellke

his stooge. Journalist Paul is hired to do the teaching, which yields unexpected results: The more Billie learns, the more she realizes Harry is a scumbag and a criminal. Garson Kanin’s comedy Born Yesterday was the big hit of 1946. layton ommunity Theatre presents the show at 8 p.m.

Thursday through Saturday and at 2 p.m. Sunday (May 4 to 14 at the Washington University South ampus Theatre 6 01 layton Road; www.placeseveryone.org).

Tickets are $15 to 20.

—Paul Friswold

Born Yesterday

St. Louis Print Fair SATURDAY 0506 Do you love everything paper- Cherokee Street related? Then the University of Missouri-St. Louis has the event Cinco de Mayo for you. The St. Louis Fine Print,

Harry Brock is a junk dealer on a mission. He heads to Washington, D. ., to bribe a politician to change some laws for the benefit of his favorite junkman — himself.

His showgirl mistress Billie tags along, so Harry decides to get her an education while he’s finding

Rare Book & Paper Arts Fair features 30 rare book and fine print dealers presenting a wide variety of materials to curious collectors. riverfronttimes.com

This year’s treasures include original watercolors and historic photographs, as well as fine art prints and illustrated books. The St. Louis Fine Print Fair opens with a special preview party and silent auction from 6 to 9 p.m. Friday, May 5. Regular hours are from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Saturday and 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. Sunday, May 6 and , at the . . enney Building on UMSL’s campus (1 University Drive at Natural Bridge Road; www.umsl. edu). Tickets are $5 to $40.

—Bill Loellke

There are festivals, and then there is Cherokee Street’s Cinco de Mayo. Far more a celebration

MAY 3-9, 2017

Continued on pg 24

RIVERFRONT TIMES

23

CALENDAR Continued from pg 23 those lined up outside starting at 9:45 a.m.; winner gets one free comic a week for the next year. The Wizard’s Wagon (6388 Delmar Boulevard, niversity ity www.thewizardswagon.com) has Superfun Yeah Yeah Rocketship, DJ BaconBeatz and a flapjack apprentice of Dr. Dan the Pancake Man working the room throughout the day. Admission to free comic book day is free. —Paul Friswold

SUNDAY 05/07 St. Louis Book Fair The buffalo soldiers get their due this Saturday at the Mary Meachum Freedom Crossing. | FRANK JAY HAYNES of the neighborhood than a commemoration of Mexico’s longago victory over France, this inco party crams three stages of live music, mariachis, bull riding and lucha libre (courtesy of Dynamo Pro restling along herokee treet between Jefferson and Nebraska avenues (www.cincodemayostl. com) today from 11 a.m. to 10 p.m.

There are activities for the kids, party beverages for the adults and the beloved People’s Joy Parade for everyone. Among this year’s oats, homemade costumes and Gigante puppets you may spot this year’s special guest — the Donald Trump piñata. The line to take a whack at that may be longer than the beer line. Admission to herokee treet inco de ayo is free.

—Paul Friswold

Buffalo Soldiers & Bicycles Mary Meachum was a free-born black woman who fought slavery by helping black people cross the Mississippi from St. Louis into the free state of Illinois during 1855. Every year her courage and conviction is remembered at the Mary Meachum Freedom rossing site t. ouis Riverfront Trail at Prairie Avenue; www. marymeachum.org). This year’s event promises to be bigger than ever, with a 10 a.m. bike ride and black history tour along Riverfront Trail, followed by a celebration in honor of Meachum and the 25th 24

RIVERFRONT TIMES

olored nfantry the “buffalo soldiers” of legend), who covered an incredible 1,900 miles on bicycle from Montana to St. Louis in the summer of 1897. Their mission was to test out the bicycle as a possible conveyance for soldiers in the pre-automobile era; they arrived in St. Louis 41 days later and were greeted by rapturous crowds. The buffalo soldiers will be honored starting at noon, with performances by choirs, dancers and historic reenactors. There will also be games and activities for kids, concessions and a barn dance starting at 4:15 p.m. Admission to Buffalo Soldiers and Bicycles is free.

—Paul Friswold

Free Comic Book Day The only thing better than new comic book day is Free Comic Book Day — and today, you get both. The mainstream and indie publishers have a raft of brand-new, free comics just waiting for you to come pick them up at participating shops. There are titles for every age group — from Riverdale, the Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa written tie-in to the T series of the same name, to the relaunch of ‘60s cartoon superhero, Underdog — with superheroes and sci-fi classics strongly represented. tar lipper (1319 Washington Avenue; www. fantasybooksinc.com) celebrates the day from 10 a.m. to 8 p.m., with raffle tickets distributed to

MAY 3-9, 2017

riverfronttimes.com

The peripatetic St. Louis Book Fair has found a new home — Greensfelder Recreation omplex in ueeny ark 0 Weidman Road, Ballwin; www. stlouisbookfair.org). It’s a larger location than prior venues, which means there will be more books available for area readers. There will also be more Ds, D Ds and assorted paraphernalia out in the open, but you don’t go to a book sale and leave with D Ds. The t.

Louis Book Fair is open from 4 to 9 p.m. Thursday, 10 a.m. to 8 p.m.

Friday and Saturday, and 11 a.m. to 6 p.m. Sunday (May 4 to 7). There’s also a one-hour shopping session open only to the elderly and the disabled from 8 to 9 a.m. Saturday, which should be less crowded and more easily navigable. Admission is $10 on opening night and free all other days.

—Paul Friswold

MONDAY 05/08 Philip Boehm Chasing the King of Hearts seems like a title for a romantic comedy, not a novel about life in Poland during World War II. But Hanna Krall is not your average writer.

The Polish author survived the Holocaust as a four-year-old, and she has both a poet’s eye for detail and the ability to couch a story of love with the horror of Poland’s occupation, leavening her tale with unexpected bursts of dark humor spiked by the insanity of the war. Izolda falls for Shayek and marries him, only to lose him to the camps. She doesn’t know if he’s still alive, much less if she will live

to rescue him (her initial plan) or mourn him. The world spirals out of control, but men and women still irt even as they worry about their missing teeth and murdered relatives. rolific translator Philip Boehm (also the artistic director of St. Louis’ own Upstream Theater) has been praised for his “glorious translation” of Krall’s novel, which finally reached American shores this year. Boehm reads from and signs copies of Chasing the King of Hearts at 6:30 p.m. this evening at Subterranean Books (6275 Delmar Boulevard, niversity ity www. subbooks.com). Admission is free.

—Paul Friswold

WEDNESDAY 05/10 Saturday Night Fever John Travolta was catapulted to super-stardom thanks to his role in Saturday Night Fever. He plays Tony Manero, a working-class nobody who lives for Saturday nights at a Brooklyn disco. On the dance floor he’s a king, and every king needs a queen. When he meets Stephanie, a dancer with dreams of moving out of Brooklyn and making something of her life, he realizes that he could maybe benefit from some life changes of his own. Saturday Night Fever celebrates its 40th anniversary this year, and Fathom Events marks the occasion with special screenings of the director’s cut of the film in theaters nationwide. You can see it locally at 2 p.m. Saturday and at 7 p.m. Wednesday (May 7 and 10) at Marcus Wehrenberg Ronnie’s 20 ine 320 outh indbergh Boulevard; www.fathomevents. com). Tickets are $12.50.

—Paul Friswold Planning an event, exhibiting your art or putting on a play? Let us know and we’ll include it in the calendar section or publish a listing on our website — for free! Send details via e-mail (calendar@riverfronttimes.com), fax (314-754-6416) or mail (6358 Delmar Boulevard, Suite 300, St. Louis, MO 63130, attn: Calendar). Include the date, time, price, contact information and location (including ZIP code). Please submit information three weeks prior to the date of your event. No telephone submissions will be accepted.

Find more events online at www.riverfronttimes.com.

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THE BOOM BOOM BOMBSHELLS BURLESQUE SHOWS EVERY FRIDAY & SATURDAY 7 PM: DINNER SHOW 10 PM: LATE NIGHT SHOW Tickets and Reservations: 314-436-7000 or theboomboomroomstl.com

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FILM

A toast, to nightmarish family dinners! | © 2016 TESUCO HOLDINGS LTD [REVIEW]

Appetite for Deconstruction The Dinner is a moveable feast of narrative deceptions Written by

ROBERT HUNT The Dinner

Directed and written by Oren Moverman.

Starring Richard Gere, Laura Linney, Steve Coogan and Rebecca Hall. Opens Friday, May 5 at Landmark Plaza Frontenac Cinema.

A

nyone who keeps up with modern literature is familiar with the concept of the unreliable narrator, the subjective storyteller who is gradually revealed to be manipulating the narrative by means of deception or delusion. In Oren Moverman’s The Dinner, it’s not just the characters who can’t be trusted; it’s the story itself, a fragmented, scrambled narrative that

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refuses to settle down for a minute.

Is it a psychological drama, a horror film, a dark very dark comedy The answer is yes, probably.

Adapted from Herman Koch’s 2009 novel, an international bestseller, the film takes place mostly over a single evening with two couples at an outrageously trendy restaurant. tan ohman Richard ere is a successful congressman, pulling strings to pass a new mental health act while on the verge of winning his state’s governorship. His brother aul teve oogan is a high school history teacher nursing a lifetime of sibling rivalry. Their wives Rebecca Hall and aura inney struggle to maintain their own authority against Stan’s continual politicking and Paul’s well-maintained wall of bitterness. With new battle lines being drawn every few minutes, they pretend to share a friendly dinner while struggling to avoid the subject on everyone’s minds, a horrific violent crime.

Though all four performers are excellent, it’s oogan who carries the weight of the film, and once you get used to his curiously hard-to-place American accent, he’s extraordinary, with a thick skin of neuroses that is

MAY 3-9, 2017

riverfronttimes.com

almost painful to watch. Paul is recovering from a recent breakdown, the symptoms of which are an obsession with the Battle of ettysburg and a disdain for the entire world. oogan starts the film as a oody Allen character played straight, his grouchy dial cranked up to eleven, but as the film progresses, he transforms into a man who is both sympathetic and extremely irritating, broken yet monstrous.

The film is structured around the various courses of a dinner, with sequences announced via titles as “aperitif,” “main course,” and so on, each one introduced by a parade of restaurant staff who very brie y give the film the ambiance of a 1930s musical. Moverman plays on the irony of the setting, with the bickering characters regularly interrupted by the fawning restaurateur ichael hernus who gushes over each course, from an appetizer of “young winter roots sprinkled with a burnt pumpernickel soil” to the dessert, “a melting chocolate egg with parsnip cake and grapefruit on Bra il nuts, edible owers and mint, topped with a salted whiskey caramel.”

The sense of extravagance is

matchedbyanequallysubtleoverload of music, a rich texture of sounds created by music supervisor Hal Willner that serves as both ambient background in the restaurant and the eclectic soundtrack to the minds of its patrons. Soon the contrast between the excess of the meal and the suppressed emotional turmoil of the diners becomes dizzying.

If I’ve said very little about the film’s plot, that unreliable narrative, it’s not because the details — the trauma of the past, the violence no one wants to discuss, the shared history — aren’t important, but because they’re inseparable from the method in which they’re revealed.

The film’s comical sense of ritual and artifice, the loose ends of its unresolved dramatic lines, its elaborately staged set-pieces, the raw emotions of its four broken characters: Moverman treats the elements of The Dinner not as fragments of a puzzle but as the contents of a kaleidoscope, small shards of story and character constantly interacting and moving, always visible but never stable. It’s a powerful and disturbing film, an unsettling experience that lingers long after the final course has been served. n

ART GALLERIES

27

Candy • Salt Water Taffy • Gifts • Posters Tin Signs • Over 400 + Sodas • Gags & More!

“Adults are only kids grown up.”

-Walt Disney

Agnes Denes, Wheatfield—A Confrontation: Battery Park Landfill, Downtown Manhattan, with Agnes Denes Standing in the Field, 1982. Courtesy the artist and Leslie Tonkonow Artworks + Projects, New York. Photo: John McGrall.

Tennessee Williams: The Playwright and the Painter Saint Louis University Museum of Art 3663 Lindell Blvd. | sluma.slu.edu Opens 5 to 8 p.m. Fri. May 5. Continues through Jul. 23.

In addition to his work as a playwright, Tennessee Williams painted. The subject of his expressionist paintings varies; often he painted close friends, but some of his creations reference scenes from his plays, or reveal his personal feelings. David Wolkowsky, a close friend of Williams, has graciously loaned seventeen paintings from his personal collection to the Saint Louis University Museum of Art as part of this year’s Tennessee Williams Festival St. Louis. This is only the second time they’ve been exhibited outside of Key West, so fans should take advantage of this rare viewing. The show is supplemented by an audio recording of Williams reading his poetry and a short video of Wolkowsky discussing his friend.

Urban Planning: Art and the City 1967-2017 Contemporary Art Museum St. Louis 3750 Washington Blvd. | www.camstl.org

017 e 11, 2 ESS n u J , y LN Sunda & WEL

Opens 7-9 p.m. Fri., May 5. Continues through Aug. 13.

Agnes Denes’ photograph Wheatfield -- A Confrontation: Battery Park Landfill, Downtown Manhattan is one of the more incongruous images you’re likely to see. The artist stands holding a staff in a hip-deep golden field of wheat; rising up from the other side of the street is a battalion of skyscrapers. You don’t think of Manhattan as agriculturally active, but wheat grew wild near the landfill in 1982. The image is part of the Contemporary’s summer exhibition, Urban Planning: Art and the City 1967-2017, which takes a contemplative approach to documenting the ebb and flow of city life. Urban Planning comprises photographs, sculptures and installations that address gentrification, white flight and the decay that follows and the occasional rebirth of a city.

HEALTH ION OF T A R B E A CEL

Sunday, June 11, 2017 • Start time 7:00 a.m.

• Riders receive complimentary post-ride celebration lunch, T-shirt and much more!

• Routes for riders at beginner, intermediate and advanced levels • SAG support and rest-stops available throughout the ride • Ride begins and ends at Chesterfield Amphitheater

Register at: stlukestourdewellness.com Register by May 1, 2017, to receive Early Bird rates!

For more information, contact: The Office of Development (314) 576-2345 or Kaelen Carrier at kaelen.carrier@stlukes-stl.com St. Luke’s Hospital Tour de Wellness is presented by:

Through partnerships with:

—Paul Friswold

2-2629

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MAY 3-9, 2017

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$5.99 Skins, T-ravs, BBQ Pork Sliders, Hummus, Fried Pickles, Pretzel Twists, Nachos, Housemade Pub Chips, Housemade Nuts, Chips with Salsa, Steamed Edamame, Tomato Infused Oil with Crostinis, Hamburger and Fries.

REGULAR MENU Sunday –Thursday | 11 – 10pm Sund Friday & Saturday | 11 – 11pm

CAFE

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Typical of Herbie’s timeless cuisine: a coffee and chile-rubbed lamb with whipped potatoes, broccolini and bing cherry demi-glace. | MABEL SUEN [REVIEW]

Remembrance of Meals Past The new Herbie’s will take you back ... to the old Herbie’s, and to Cardwell’s, too Written by

CHERYL BAEHR Herbie’s

8100 Maryland Avenue, Clayton; 314-769-9595.

Mon.-Thurs. 11 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-10 p.m.; Fri, 11 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-11 p.m.; Sat. 10 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-11 p.m.; Sun. 10 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-10 p.m.

A

nyone who frequented the late, great Cardwell’s in Clayton knows that the restaurant had a particular fragrance.

You noticed it the minute you stepped through the front doors

and into the vestibule — the scent of cedar and spice that made you feel like you were walking into a cigar box.

As a server in the late ‘90s it hit me every day I walked in for a shift, and clung to my clothes like perfume even after I’d left for the day. The smell always triggered a sense of nostalgia for me, as I imagine it did for the legion of regulars who packed the Cardwell’s bar like it was their country club.

Regulars at the old Herbie’s in the Central West End surely felt a similar sort of comfort in that space: Chef Bonzo greeting them with an outstretched hand, vintage liquor posters on the walls, luxe tufted leather banquettes they could sink into with a glass of Chablis.

To say that both Cardwell’s and Herbie’s meant something to people is an understatement. The former, opened by acclaimed chef Bill Cardwell and restaurateur Rich Gorczyca in 1987, was a pioneer of seasonal American cuisine. The

latter was a reincarnation of the old Balaban’s, which had brought the city out of the dining dark ages when it opened in 1972, honoring its storied legacy while successfully forging its own path. Though they existed independent of each other, their common bond as icons of the St. Louis restaurant scene and not-dissimilar culinary styles resulted in the restaurants often being spoken of in the same breath.

It made sense, then, that when big changes came up on the horizon for both restaurants, they looked to one another for the solution. Though the Central West End spot was intimately associated with the Herbie’s brand, owner Aaron Teitelbaum was looking to make a move when his lease came up last fall. At the same time, Cardwell’s owner Rich Gorczyca had decided to retire from the restaurant business and close Cardwell’s (Bill Cardwell had long since departed for Cardwell’s at the Plaza and BC’s Kitchen). The Clayton spot, Teitelbaum, thought, would be riverfronttimes.com

the perfect place for Herbie’s. For Gorczyca, letting Teitelbaum take over would be a way to walk away with the comfort that his employees would be offered jobs, and a worthy successor would be there to honor the Cardwell’s legacy.

The result of the arrangement is more of a merger than a simple closure and relocation — which is why both Cardwell’s and Herbie’s loyalists will still feel nostalgic when they step inside 8100 Maryland Avenue. Chef Bonzo, for instance, still stands at attention at the front door, though now his ga e is fixed on a sprawling patio and metallic statue. And that spice box fragrance still greets you at the entrance, only now it leads to a bar area that is all Herbie’s, down to the seating and Art Deco chandeliers.

Those vintage posters from Herbie’s (which date back to the Balaban’s days) are still there, though they hang on walls in a room that is laid out exactly like Cardwell’s.

The more things change, the more they stay the Continued on pg 30

MAY 3-9, 2017

RIVERFRONT TIMES

29

CAFE

29

Typical of Herbie’s timeless cuisine: a coffee and chile-rubbed lamb with whipped potatoes, broccolini and bing cherry demi-glace. | MABEL SUEN [REVIEW]

Remembrance of Meals Past The new Herbie’s will take you back ... to the old Herbie’s, and to Cardwell’s, too Written by

CHERYL BAEHR Herbie’s

8100 Maryland Avenue, Clayton; 314-769-9595.

Mon.-Thurs. 11 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-10 p.m.; Fri, 11 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-11 p.m.; Sat. 10 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-11 p.m.; Sun. 10 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-10 p.m.

A

nyone who frequented the late, great Cardwell’s in Clayton knows that the restaurant had a particular fragrance.

You noticed it the minute you stepped through the front doors

and into the vestibule — the scent of cedar and spice that made you feel like you were walking into a cigar box.

As a server in the late ‘90s it hit me every day I walked in for a shift, and clung to my clothes like perfume even after I’d left for the day. The smell always triggered a sense of nostalgia for me, as I imagine it did for the legion of regulars who packed the Cardwell’s bar like it was their country club.

Regulars at the old Herbie’s in the Central West End surely felt a similar sort of comfort in that space: Chef Bonzo greeting them with an outstretched hand, vintage liquor posters on the walls, luxe tufted leather banquettes they could sink into with a glass of Chablis.

To say that both Cardwell’s and Herbie’s meant something to people is an understatement. The former, opened by acclaimed chef Bill Cardwell and restaurateur Rich Gorczyca in 1987, was a pioneer of seasonal American cuisine. The

latter was a reincarnation of the old Balaban’s, which had brought the city out of the dining dark ages when it opened in 1972, honoring its storied legacy while successfully forging its own path. Though they existed independent of each other, their common bond as icons of the St. Louis restaurant scene and not-dissimilar culinary styles resulted in the restaurants often being spoken of in the same breath.

It made sense, then, that when big changes came up on the horizon for both restaurants, they looked to one another for the solution. Though the Central West End spot was intimately associated with the Herbie’s brand, owner Aaron Teitelbaum was looking to make a move when his lease came up last fall. At the same time, Cardwell’s owner Rich Gorczyca had decided to retire from the restaurant business and close Cardwell’s (Bill Cardwell had long since departed for Cardwell’s at the Plaza and BC’s Kitchen). The Clayton spot, Teitelbaum, thought, would be riverfronttimes.com

the perfect place for Herbie’s. For Gorczyca, letting Teitelbaum take over would be a way to walk away with the comfort that his employees would be offered jobs, and a worthy successor would be there to honor the Cardwell’s legacy.

The result of the arrangement is more of a merger than a simple closure and relocation — which is why both Cardwell’s and Herbie’s loyalists will still feel nostalgic when they step inside 8100 Maryland Avenue. Chef Bonzo, for instance, still stands at attention at the front door, though now his ga e is fixed on a sprawling patio and metallic statue. And that spice box fragrance still greets you at the entrance, only now it leads to a bar area that is all Herbie’s, down to the seating and Art Deco chandeliers.

Those vintage posters from Herbie’s (which date back to the Balaban’s days) are still there, though they hang on walls in a room that is laid out exactly like Cardwell’s.

The more things change, the more they stay the Continued on pg 30

MAY 3-9, 2017

RIVERFRONT TIMES

29

HERBIE’S Continued from pg 29 same.

And that’s good news not just for fans of the atmosphere, but also for those hoping to see a continuity in the food. The chef at the time of the move, Chris Vomund, explained that the menu would be vintage Herbie’s in style, even if many of the dishes changed. (Vomund left a few weeks ago for a job with food distribution company Sysco.) Herbie’s menu always changes seasonally, he noted, so any difference people might notice was nothing more than a regular update.

And yet it struck me that the current offerings would be equally appropriate were they emblazoned on menu stock that read “Cardwell’s” — albeit one read with a mild French accent. This is not a backhanded compliment. There is a time and a place for tried and true seasonal American food. Even if it isn’t exactly cutting edge, it gives a comforting familiarity — something especially important to those who frequented both the clubby Cardwell’s and posh Herbie’s.

Take the savory crab and bacon bread pudding, an appetizer that bespeaks the warm satisfaction of upscale Thanksgiving stuffing. A sherry-dressed mushrooms and arugula salad brightens the plate.

Or beautifully cooked risotto, made even more creamy with mascarpone cheese — the best of the first courses. Peas, corn, tomatoes and fresh rosemary gave pops of avor through the richness. It’s such an excellent dish I’d be tempted to order it as an entree.

Herbie’s does not stray from tradition with its escargots, a porcelain dish of buttery snails that signals its arrival from across the dining room with a mouthwatering clarified butter and garlic aroma.

at e r G

Feast on firecracker shrimp, grilled duck breast and beef Wellington ... followed, perhaps, by “Ding Dongs.” | MABEL SUEN Short of a little salt, you’d want nothing more for this classic dish.

Vomund told me there would be hell to pay if he ever took Herbie’s “Firecracker Shrimp” off the menu, though ’m not sure why. t’s a fine enough appeti er — the shellfish is tender and has a pleasantly crisp panko exterior. Flavor-wise, though, it’s quite bland. The menu says the dish is prepared with chipotle aioli, egg and tobiko caviar.

However, I detected none of the smoke, richness or umami these should deliver. A tiny drizzle of honey sriracha was was the only thing that provided flavor to an otherwise boring dish.

A argherita atbread ticked off all of the boxes — tomatoes, basil

s! e c i Pr

and balsamic vinegar. However, the cheese that covered the crust was more akin to gooey Provel than the promised mozzarella. A lunchtime atbread, topped with prosciutto and blue cheese, had a pleasant avor, but the shell was so thin and crumbly it broke apart in my hands and I had to use a fork to eat it.

The vegetable lasagna, both its lunch and dinner versions, also had some textural issues. The dish tasted delicious. Herb- ecked marinara was layered with zucchini, yellow squash, spinach and so much mozzarella and marscapone cheese it oozed in every bite. However, I was confused: If it was lasagna, I didn’t detect noodles. If it

was more like a parmesan, then it needed some heft. As is, it seems almost soup-like when pierced.

Sole, deboned tableside and cooked perfectly, is finished with brown butter, poached asparagus and fingerling potatoes — how can you go wrong? Herbie’s classic lobster mac and cheese is another example of comfort seafood. Large pieces of Maine lobster tail, claw and knuckle bob in a luxurious four-cheese mornay sauce. Corn, tru e oil and an asiago gratin finish this classic indulgence.

Herbie’s other signature dish, beef Wellington, remains so for a reason. Flaky puff pastry encases a mushroom duxelle-coated filet for a textbook Continued on pg 32

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“amazing!” asian food with a mexican twist

TACOS BEEF SHORT RIB TERIYAKI CHICKEN SWEET & SPICY PORK PAN-SEARED COD

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Prints from the old Herbie’s now grace the walls of the Clayton space. | MABEL SUEN

join us for nightly dinner specials

HERBIE’S Continued from pg 30

3 1 01 A RS EN A L | (31 4 ) 802-709 0 | O PEN DAILY 11 AM - 8PM

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rendition. Likewise, a bing cherry demi-glace serves as a classic pairing for coffee and chili-rubbed lamb and a duck breast, accented with plum and citrus coulis. All were served at the desired temperature on separate visits.

Like the savory side of the menu, desserts do not stray from tradition. A flourless chocolate cake provides the rich and bittersweet decadence you’d expect — and of course it’s served with mixed berry mousse. Red velvet doughnuts with cream cheese frosting beg to be dipped in the accompanying Grand Mariner chocolate sauce. And let’s not forget Herbie’s (and Balaban’s) deep-fried, Bailey’s-dipped chocolate fritters, which I’m convinced remain a major reason the restaurant has so many regulars.

Over the past few years, I’ve mainly reviewed new restaurants, figuring that we already know what to expect of the established places.

However, Herbie’s relocation threw that certainty into question. Has it

remained the restaurant we fondly remember? And the answer proves to be yes; Herbie’s holds up.

In many ways, that’s a good thing; sometimes you just want an oldschool rack of lamb and a Caesar salad, served with a bread basket and ramekin of piped butter. In other ways, judging by current trends, it reads as dated. This isn’t because Herbie’s has changed, though; it’s that we have. Putting buerre blanc and demi-glace on a meat-starch-vegetable composed plate may be timeless, but it’s not necessarily en vogue.

But that’s OK. No one really expected Herbie’s to use its relocation as a chance to reinvent the wheel. Judging by the numerous loyalists who appear to have made the move to Clayton, no one really wanted that either. That’s why its regulars — and the Cardwell’s regulars too — can breathe a sigh of relief. The food is good, and the place is just as they remember. n Herbie’s

Vegetable risotto ............................. $12 Lobster mac and cheese ................. $23 Beef Wellington ............................... $34

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SAVAGE LOVE THE LEFTOVERS

BY DAN SAVAGE Nancy, the tech-savvy at-risk youth, two gimps, Christ on the cross, the Easter Bunny, two weeping women and the Easter Bunny’s smoking-hot leather master took to the stage at Revolution Hall in Portland, Oregon, for a live taping of the Savage Lovecast on Easter weekend. Audience members submitted their questions on cards (I take my questions like some of you take your men: anonymously) — but we didn’t get to many questions. So I’m going to answer as many of Portland’s questions as I can in this week’s column.

We’ve been sleeping with another couple for three months (first time my BF and I opened our relationship). How do I suggest full penetration with the opposite partner? At this point, we just do oral and that’s the “groove” we’re in.

Only-oral-with-others may be this couple’s preferred groove and the lane they want to stay in. If they’re only up for the “soft swap,” as it’s known in swinging circles, penetration isn’t gonna happen. But you should feel free to ask for what you want — at the very least, you’ll get some long-overdue clarity about their boundaries.

My girlfriend asked me to make out with another guy. Her fantasy. We met a really pretty gay boy at a house party, and so I made out with him. I got hard, and my girlfriend made a huge scene.

She says it was supposed to be for her pleasure, not for mine, and she’s still angry six months later and constantly

questions whether I’m really straight.

(I am!) What do I tell her?

Good-bye.

When do you know if it’s OK to insert your finger in your boyfriend’s butthole?

Without fear of freaking him out?

After you’ve applied lube to your finger and his butthole — which you’re allowed to do only after you’ve asked him if you can insert your finger in his butthole and after he’s consented to having your finger in his butthole.

I want to try anal, but I am scared of getting poop on my partner. Is an enema enough?

Properly administered, an enema should be more than enough. But with anal as with liberal democracy — a good outcome is not guaranteed. Sometimes you do your homework and your prep and everything still comes to shit.

I love my man, but we’re both tops.

What should we do?

Spit-roast very special guest stars if you’re in an open relationship, take turns/one for the team if you’re in a monogamous relationship, explore and enjoy your non-butt-penetrative options.

How do we play around with opening up our relationship as parents of a oneyear-old? We barely have enough time or enough sleep to keep our own relationship juicy.

Play around in theory for now — lots of dirty talk — and put theory into practice after your kid is a toddler and you’ve landed a reliable babysitter.

My girlfriend and I are pretty grossly in love and very affectionate, especially af-

ter we’ve just had sex. Should we make an effort to tone it down a bit around a third we’ve just fucked around with?

Or should we just be ourselves, and if they don’t like it, oh well?

Be yourselves — but make an effort to include your third in those oxytocin-infused displays of postcoital affection.

Unless your third was inconsiderate or creepy during the sex, or is anxious to go immediately after the sex (a sign you may have been inconsiderate or creepy), your third helped get you to that blissed-out state and deserves to bask a bit in the afterglow too.

Does the toe make a good substitute for the penis?

No. I have large breasts. My partners are either like, “YAY BOOOOBS!” or they ignore my breasts entirely. What is it with that? How do I get people to interact with my breasts like they’re another nice body part and not a bizarre thing?

By using your words. If there was a way you didn’t like to be kissed, presumably you would speak up rather than endure lousy kisses. Same applies here: “I have big boobs, and they’re great, and I love them — but ‘YAY BOOOOBS!’ makes me feel like I’m only my tits, which isn’t a nice feeling. That said, I don’t want my boobs ignored, either. The sweet spot really isn’t that hard to hit — enjoy my boobs like you would any other nice body part.” That said, some people really, really like big boobs and it’s going to be hard for them to contain their excitement. “YAY BOOOOBS” could be an understandable and forgivable first reaction on their part and an opening that allows you to have a conversation about bod-

53

ies, consideration, and consent.

Tell my boyfriend to go down on me!

If your boyfriend won’t go down on you unless some fag advice columnist tells him to — if his girlfriend asking isn’t good enough — then it’s you I want to order around (break up with him!), not your boyfriend.

My boyfriend is ten years older than me.

Also, he’s the first boyfriend I’ve had in ten years. I’m used to being single — and while he is great (sexy, amazing, smart), I feel like I’m losing parts of myself. I’m not doing the stuff my prior loneliness made it easy for me to do, creative stuff like open-mic nights. Do we break up?

You’re no longer lonely — you’ve got a boyfriend now — but you still need time alone. Even if you live together, you don’t have to spend every waking/ non-work hour with your boyfriend — it’s not healthy to spend every waking/ non-work hour with your significant other. But instead of heading to openmic night because you’re lonely and bored and have nothing else to do, now you’re going to go to that openmic night (and go alone) because you enjoy it, you need the creative outlet, and it’s healthy for a couple to have time apart.

Thank you, Dan. Five years ago, I was miserable in a sexless marriage. Tonight I’m here with my fabulous boyfriend and my hot sub. Thanks to your advice!

You’re welcome!

Listen to Dan’s podcast at savagelovecast.com. mail@savagelove.net @fakedansavage on Twitter ITMFA.org

STREAK’S CORNER • by Bob Stretch

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36

SHORT ORDERS

[SIDE DISH]

The Sous Chef Hails from Texas Written by

CHERYL BAEHR

S

am Witherspoon, the executive sous chef of Sardella (7734 Forsyth Boulevard, Clayton; 314-773-7755), laughs when he notes his original, ill-fated career plan. “I was studying criminology but failed out of college,” Witherspoon says sheepishly. “I wanted to be a DEA agent, but, well, I guess I didn’t realize that there are some things you shouldn’t have done if you wanted to go into that career field.”

Witherspoon can laugh about it now, but at the time he struggled to figure out what he wanted to do with his life. He knew he loved cooking — how couldn’t he?

Growing up in Texas, holidays and even ordinary weekends consisted of backyard barbecues where his uncles would smoke briskets and sausages and his grandmother would do the rest. “We were really into food,” recalls Witherspoon.

“It wasn’t in the sense that we were sourcing seasonal ingredients or anything, but we just made it happen.”

That “make it happen” attitude is how Witherspoon approached his first ob in the kitchen. Though completely inexperienced, he got a job under an executive chef at an exclusive country club in Houston that counted George H.W. Bush as a member. “I didn’t have any knives, and I didn’t know how to cut an onion,” Witherspoon recalls. “I was a blank slate, but I always asked what the right way to do something was and that’s how I fell into the ranks really quickly.

I was a guy with zero experience working a station on my second day.”

From Houston, Witherspoon en36

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Sam Witherspoon worked for Danny Meyer and at Cochon before landing in St. Louis. | KELLY GLUECK rolled in the Culinary Institute of America in New York and worked for a few acclaimed spots — Danny Meyer’s Maialino, Cochon in New Orleans — before landing in St. Louis. His girlfriend was moving to town, and he decided to come with her, not knowing what to expect of the food scene.

He was instantly impressed. “ y first meal was at Farmhaus and I was blown away,” Witherspoon says. “Kevin Willmann is amazing and let me stage there, and then I got the call from Gerard [Craft]. Kevin told me that if I had the chance to work for him that I needed to take it.”

Though he is now steeped in the St. Louis food culture, there is one thing that continues to surprise him: The restaurant community’s willingness to work together. “It’s such a tight-knit community here.

New Orleans wasn’t like that; it’s cutthroat down there,” says Witherspoon. “Here, everyone is willing to help or lend a hand with whatever anyone needs.”

Witherspoon took a break from

MAY 3-9, 2017

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the kitchen to share his thoughts on the St. Louis restaurant scene, his love-hate relationship with coffee and why you’ll never see a strawberry in his kitchen in January.

What is one thing people don’t know about you that you wish they did?

I hate coffee, but I drink it for effect.

What daily ritual is non-negotiable for you?

Though it sounds counter-intuitive based off the first answer, drinking my first cup of coffee when I walk in the door.

If you could have any superpower, what would it be?

The power to stop time.

What is the most positive thing in food, wine or cocktails that you’ve noticed in St. Louis over the past year?

I think that St. Louis is embracing the fact that you don’t have to have a fine dining experience to enjoy elevated food. A lot of places are really showcasing the care of their craft with different styles

and cuisines of food.

What is something missing in the local food, wine or cocktail scene that you’d like to see?

I’d like to see more Latin American food. Within each Latin country, there is such a variety of cuisines, so I’d like to see more restaurants really exploring that.

Who is your St. Louis food crush?

I would say Matt Daughaday at Reeds American Table. He’s a cool cat, and every time that I go to Reeds, the food is off the chain. I also think that people should be paying attention to Brian Moxey at Brasserie/Taste. He is putting off some heat at both restaurants with more new dishes on the menu than I’ve seen in the past.

It’s just well executed, great food.

Who’s the one person to watch right now in the St. Louis dining scene?

Michael Gallina. I went to Vicia for my birthday two weeks ago, and everything about the experience, from the service to the food, was really great.

Which ingredient is most representative of your personality?

Maybe a chile pepper? I’m pretty fiery. ome people are into it, some people aren’t.

If you weren’t working in the restaurant business, what would you be doing?

Probably working at a hunting lodge. That was my first job, as a guide at a hunting lodge. Or maybe a zoologist.

Name an ingredient never allowed in your kitchen.

Out-of-season berries. I hate them.

What is your after work hangout?

Jack Patrick’s downtown, but home most nights these days!

What’s your food or beverage guilty pleasure?

Red Diamond Sweet Tea or What-A-Burger; it’s a Texas classic. Everyone who is from Texas will live and breathe What-ABurger.

What would be your last meal on earth?

Breakfast prepared by my brother-in-law’s grandmother.

She would whip up eggs, bacon, refried beans, homemade tortillas and different salsas — everything you want in a Texas breakfast. n

[FOOD NEWS]

[OLDIES]

FOR THE LOOP, ‘CRACK FRIES’ AND 80 TAPS

50 Years of Pasta con Broccoli

H

Written by

SARAH FENSKE

F

ifty years ago, a pair of Italian families with long roots in the St. Louis restaurant industry opened a place on Delmar.

Rich and Charlie’s, named for co-owners Rich Ronzio and Charlie Mugavero, quickly became known for its pasta, its salad dressing and its knishes.

Yes, knishes. The original Rich and Charlie’s was a Jewish/Italian hybrid, with matzoh soup and pastrami in addition to canneloni and cavatelli. It was, recalls Marty Ronzio, a late-night spot — it had no liquor license, but stayed open ‘til 3 a.m. to accommodate hungry revelers.

“A lot of the business was after the bars were closed,” he says.

“Instead of going to the pancake house, you’d go eat some pasta.”

It goes without saying that much has changed since that opening in 1967. But what’s almost more remarkable is what hasn’t. When Rich and Charlie’s owners brought back an original menu to celebrate their 50 years in business last week, they realized that all but one of the pasta offerings were still on the menu. That salad dressing is still exactly the same (customers buy it by the case, online and at local groceries). And even though the restaurant’s matriarchs no longer make the pasta by hand in a family basement, the recipes have not been altered.

The current owners — cousins Marty Ronzio, Emil Pozzo Sr. and Chuck Pozzo, who are descendants of the original Rich, as well as Emil’s brother-in-law Dominic Puleo — say they’ve added some things and taken away others. Naturally, they now offer gluten-free options, as well as low-carb ones. They no longer offer knishes; the Jewish stuff is almost entirely gone.

But for the most part, they say, customers look to them for their

The Pozzo family founded the commissary that serviced Rich and Charlie’s. | COURTESY OF EMIL POZZO JR. consistency.

“People like to see a familiar face,” says Emil Pozzo Jr., manager of the Crestwood location. “We get a lot of people who ask for their server by name.”

They come for the friendly service, the generous portions (“we go through a lot of to-go boxes,” notes Paul Ronzio, manager of the Lemay Ferry location and Marty’s son) and the kind of St. Louis-style Italian that might surprise diners in Naples or Venice, but that feels at home in south and west county.

Customers buy “Rich and Charlie’s Famous Salad” by the pan come the holiday season.

“People know what their favorites are,” notes Paul Ronzio. “Seventy percent of them, they’re ordering the same two or three things every time.”

He adds, “There would be riots if we got rid of the pasta con broccoli.”

The family has stories. Back when they opened the first Town & Country location, people would ride up on horses — that’s how far the place seemed from the city in those days. And there was once a white tablecloth Rich and Charlie’s, located near the old Arena.

“People would dress up in coats and ties to go to hockey games,” recalls Marty Ronzio. “They were crazy busy at that location.”

The closure of that Rich and Charlie’s was tied, in part, to the tragedy in the restaurant’s backstory: Co-founder Charlie Mugavero was killed, along with his wife, when the commercial airliner they were on crashed en route to

Puerta Vallerta.

Of that Arena location, says Marty Ronzio, “That was Charlie’s baby. When he passed away and we had all the other things going, it just didn’t make sense any more.”

These days, there are four Rich and Charlie’s, all in St. Louis County.

(The original location at Delmar and Old Bonhomme is not among them; it’s now a Pasta House.)

As Rich and Charlie’s celebrates its 50th anniversary this year, the restaurants are offering a special: Sunday through Thursday, you can get two pastas from the original menu, salad and mini cannoli for just $19.67.

An even better deal lets you roll all the way back to 1960s pricing: Twenty winners each month will be selected to dine out at the original prices, based on their willingness to share their memories under #richandcharlies50 on social media.

You don’t need to be online to get in on the competition, though; diners can also share those memories in person. That’s not exactly unusual for Rich and Charlie’s, even if the payoff is.

“I don’t think there’s a day that goes by that somebody doesn’t walk through the door and say, ‘I’ve been coming in here since I was three years old,’” says Marty Ronzio.

“There are people who come in who you’ve known for twenty or thirty years. You end up going to funerals.”

Says his son, “You can’t walk through the dining room without recognizing at least one table.” n riverfronttimes.com

opCat, the Michigan-based craft beer-focused concept that’s taken the Midwest by storm, plans to open in the Delmar Loop later this year — bringing 80 taps and seating for 345 people, including a large beer garden.

Construction on the site, at 6317 Delmar Boulevard, is already underway. The sizable double storefront was previously home to Sole and Blues, twin clothing and footwear concepts that headed to a smaller spot on the west end of the Loop earlier this year.

In a press release last week, HopCat said it would be investing $2.5 million in the project, including extensive renovations to create a large beer garden in the rear of the space. That outdoor area alone is expected to seat 100 guests; a smaller area out front will also include sidewalk seating.

The first HopCat opened in 2008 in Grand Rapids and has since spread to fourteen cities.

While many of them are in Michigan, a Kansas City location opened in the Westport area earlier this year. Other locations are in Chicago, Indianapolis and Lexington, Kentucky.

“St. Louis has played a major role in America’s brewing heritage, so creating a HopCat in one of America’s great beer cities seemed like a natural fit,” said Mark Sellers, founder of HopCat and its parent company, BarFly Ventures, in a prepared statement. “The Delmar Loop area is just the kind of location we look for when choosing a HopCat. With easy access to amenities like the Loop Trolley, proximity to live music venues, other great restaurants and bars, and the historic Theatre Tivoli, we think HopCat can further strengthen this unique neighborhood.

HopCat serves a full food menu, which includes burgers, Detroit-style pizza, mac and cheese, and its signature “Crack Fries” (named among the top ten in the U.S. by Food Network Magazine).

The company said it would be hiring hourly employees by late summer. It expects to hire a team n of 130 people.

MAY 3-9, 2017

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Specializing in Saudi Cuisine.

The dining room has giant windows looking out on Citygarden and the downtown buildings beyond. | SARA GRAHAM 2837 CHEROKEE STREET (314) 226-9243 WED-THUR. 12-8PM FRI. 12-10PM | S AT. 1 1AM-10PM SUN. 11AM-8PM THEPALMTREESTL.COM

[FIRST LOOK]

CITYGARDEN’S NEW TENANT: KALDI’S Written by

SARA GRAHAM

S

tart with an urban oasis and add some of the city’s best coffee, a fresh and hearty menu, and inspired cocktails and you’ve got a place you might not want to leave. Ever.

This describes the much-anticipated newest location for Kaldi’s Coffee at Citygarden (808 Chestnut Street).

Co-owner Tyler Zimmer admits he was thrilled when he was approached about locating inside the kid-friendly sculpture garden, which is surrounded by towering office buildings in downtown St. Louis. “The location is incredible,” Zimmer says. “It’s such a beautiful park and neighborhood, so tied to the culture of downtown, and right in between the newly renovated Arch grounds and Kiener Plaza, the Washington Avenue strip and Busch Stadium.”

Frank McGinty, director of marketing and culinary development, offers, “This is a highly utilized garden. We want to make it highly accessible.”

The approachable menu features fresh, seasonal and local fare along with vegetarian, gluten-free and children’s items.

Located on the northeastern corner, this is the fourth tenant for the contemporary restaurant building since the

On the menu: avocado toast with feta, poached egg and hot sauce vinaigrette | SARA GRAHAM park opened in 2009. Kaldi’s brings to this part of the city not just a place to grab breakfast or lunch on the go (although you absolutely can), but also a place to linger between strolls around downtown, to dine before a Cardinals’ baseball game and simply to partake refreshment while enjoying Citygarden so you don’t have to leave.

It’s also stunning. The small restaurant is covered on three sides by floorto-ceiling windows that slide open on good-weather days. Its contemporary design uses simple materials of glass, stone, steel and wood for a timeless and warmly inviting atmosphere. Of course, there’s a large patio as well, with ample seating amidst spectacular native landscaping next to a large, rectangular pool.

The menu is similar to those found at other Kaldi’s locations — some of the best single-origin coffee in the

city, in-house and Companion Bakery baked goods, frozen smoothies and breakfast and lunch served all day.

The simple fare seems executed almost effortlessly by the veteran team.

There are a few features unique to this location. Brunch will be offered on Saturdays and Sundays. Cocktails make their menu debut showcasing either Kaldi’s coffee or tea (as of press time, the liquor license had not yet been approved). There are also a few unique individual menu items, such as a “Farmers Market Salad” with seasonal vegetables from the nearby Urban Harvest Food Roof.

Kaldi’s Coffee at Citygarden is the sixteenth location for Kaldi’s Coffee and the eighth in St. Louis. It opened to the public April 26 and will be open Monday through Friday from 6 a.m. to 6 p.m. and Saturdays and Sundays n from 7 a.m. to 3 p.m riverfronttimes.com

CELEBRATE WITH US! Starting at 5pm with Live Music & Drink Specials!

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WHITEHALL PLAZA : 3149 N Lindbergh Blvd, 314-291-8500

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Specializing in Saudi Cuisine.

The dining room has giant windows looking out on Citygarden and the downtown buildings beyond. | SARA GRAHAM 2837 CHEROKEE STREET (314) 226-9243 WED-THUR. 12-8PM FRI. 12-10PM | S AT. 1 1AM-10PM SUN. 11AM-8PM THEPALMTREESTL.COM

[FIRST LOOK]

CITYGARDEN’S NEW TENANT: KALDI’S Written by

SARA GRAHAM

S

tart with an urban oasis and add some of the city’s best coffee, a fresh and hearty menu, and inspired cocktails and you’ve got a place you might not want to leave. Ever.

This describes the much-anticipated newest location for Kaldi’s Coffee at Citygarden (808 Chestnut Street).

Co-owner Tyler Zimmer admits he was thrilled when he was approached about locating inside the kid-friendly sculpture garden, which is surrounded by towering office buildings in downtown St. Louis. “The location is incredible,” Zimmer says. “It’s such a beautiful park and neighborhood, so tied to the culture of downtown, and right in between the newly renovated Arch grounds and Kiener Plaza, the Washington Avenue strip and Busch Stadium.”

Frank McGinty, director of marketing and culinary development, offers, “This is a highly utilized garden. We want to make it highly accessible.”

The approachable menu features fresh, seasonal and local fare along with vegetarian, gluten-free and children’s items.

Located on the northeastern corner, this is the fourth tenant for the contemporary restaurant building since the

On the menu: avocado toast with feta, poached egg and hot sauce vinaigrette | SARA GRAHAM park opened in 2009. Kaldi’s brings to this part of the city not just a place to grab breakfast or lunch on the go (although you absolutely can), but also a place to linger between strolls around downtown, to dine before a Cardinals’ baseball game and simply to partake refreshment while enjoying Citygarden so you don’t have to leave.

It’s also stunning. The small restaurant is covered on three sides by floorto-ceiling windows that slide open on good-weather days. Its contemporary design uses simple materials of glass, stone, steel and wood for a timeless and warmly inviting atmosphere. Of course, there’s a large patio as well, with ample seating amidst spectacular native landscaping next to a large, rectangular pool.

The menu is similar to those found at other Kaldi’s locations — some of the best single-origin coffee in the

city, in-house and Companion Bakery baked goods, frozen smoothies and breakfast and lunch served all day.

The simple fare seems executed almost effortlessly by the veteran team.

There are a few features unique to this location. Brunch will be offered on Saturdays and Sundays. Cocktails make their menu debut showcasing either Kaldi’s coffee or tea (as of press time, the liquor license had not yet been approved). There are also a few unique individual menu items, such as a “Farmers Market Salad” with seasonal vegetables from the nearby Urban Harvest Food Roof.

Kaldi’s Coffee at Citygarden is the sixteenth location for Kaldi’s Coffee and the eighth in St. Louis. It opened to the public April 26 and will be open Monday through Friday from 6 a.m. to 6 p.m. and Saturdays and Sundays n from 7 a.m. to 3 p.m riverfronttimes.com

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MUSIC

43

[NEW MUSIC]

Play It Again, Miistro St. Louis rapper Miistro Freeyo found his faith — and the keyboard — after a childhood bout of West Nile Virus Written by

NICK HORN

I

n the vibrant and diverse scene that is St. Louis hip-hop in the twenty-teens, it’s hard to stand out, but Miistro (pronounced like “Maestro”) Freeyo manages to do just that. It’s still relatively uncommon to see rappers playing traditional instruments — especially while covering vocal duties at the same time — so the fact that Freeyo’s performances feature him accompanying himself on keyboard while both rapping and singing is simultaneously an attention-grabbing novelty and a legitimate musical asset.

But the reception could have easily gone another way. “ was a little hesitant at first,” says Freeyo, 24, of rapping with self-accompaniment, something he first tried in “middle school, going into high school years.” “At first didn’t know how it was going to be received, if it was even possible.”

At the outset, in fact, he was met with skepticism. “Nobody really took me seriously or looked at me like a rapper,” he explains.

But after his peers got a chance to witness his skills, Freeyo says, “I started seeing the reaction and gaining confidence in myself.”

Although this sort of musical multi-tasking is commonplace in just about every other contemporary genre, it’s still relatively rare in hip-hop (with the notable exception of rising star Anderson .Paak). Consequently, Freeyo is still regularly met with some confusion, even though he no longer feels as though he has to prove himself.

“Nothing happens by chance in life,” says the 24-year-old rapper. | PHOTO COURTESY OF THE ARTIST “The first thing that comes to people’s minds is maybe I’ll be playing background for somebody,” he says. “Then they see me setting up the mic.”

Ultimately, his background on keyboard has been a boon to the Miistro, allowing him to approach his art from a different perspective than the majority of his peers.

Freeyo’s ability to apply an understanding of melody and harmony to his lyrical content results in a distinctly organic sound, as much

akin to the singer-songwriter stylings of John Legend as to most of Freeyo’s more rap-centric peers.

This holistic approach to music is on full display with Freeyo’s latest effort, entitled The Prelude, to be released on May 9 — most notably on “Miss America” and “Do You Believe.”

It also happens to be these two tracks (especially “Do You Believe”) on which Freeyo’s faith — which he says has been a central part of his life since his riverfronttimes.com

high school years — takes the forefront. On the track, Freeyo asks, “Do you believe in God?” before adding, “Through every trial and tribulation I’ve kept my faith/I can’t even lie, I’ve been hit with some pain.” In fact, as Freeyo tells it, one of these tribulations was ultimately responsible for the depth of his spiritual conviction. “ think was in fifth grade,” he recalls. “I got up one morning and thought I had, like — I think

MAY 3-9, 2017

Continued on pg 47

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Where are you going to be when the puck drops?

MIISTRO FREEYO Continued from pg 43 somebody diagnosed it and said I had the flu or something like that.” Not thinking too much of it, Freeyo says he “tried to write it off; then I got up one morning to go to school and my legs was weak.”

Soon the problem progressed to the point that the eleven-year-old was completely unable to walk.

He ended up missing nearly half a year of school. “Even then, the doctors didn’t really know” what was causing the problem, he says, “until they did a spinal tap on me and saw traces of the West Nile Virus.” After his diagnosis, and doctors were able to start treating Freeyo, he began the long process of learning to walk again.

“At the time, my parents and people around me was more worried than I was,” Freeyo explains.

During his treatment at Cardinal Glennon Children’s Hospital, he recalls, “Even though I couldn’t walk… I’m in a wheelchair, there’s other people in wheelchairs too; we’re racing around the hallways.

I’m still being a kid at the time, not really realizing the seriousness of the thing.”

It wasn’t until later that Freeyo saw the significance of his bout with West Nile and began to frame the illness and recovery in spiritual terms. Though his parents took him to church throughout his childhood, even during the peak of his illness, Freeyo says with a chuckle, “I was young. I was still at that falling-asleep stage.

“Afterwards, when you get older, you kinda look back on certain things and you get more understanding,” he continues. For him, this understanding began to take shape around his high school years, at roughly the same time that he began playing keyboard at his friend’s father’s church — something he continues to do weekly.

For Freeyo, all these things — his illness, his early exposure to the keyboard, his faith — are interconnected, and all have a role in forming the artistic vision made manifest with his Prelude EP. “Nothing happens by chance in life. My whole journey from me having West Nile Virus back in 2003 — not being able to walk…” he says, pausing thoughtfully, “that’s where I get a lot of my confidence from.” n

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48

HOMESPUN

SHADY BUG tbh idk shadybug.bandcamp.com

F

music read more at RIVERFRONTTIMES.COM

48

RIVERFRONT TIMES

ans of underground folk music have had the unique privilege of experiencing the maturation of twin sisters Hannah and Delia Rainey.

Through their acoustic group Dubb Nubb — which the sisters began in high school, carried through their college years in Columbia, Missouri, and continue as they’ve migrated back home — the Raineys have turned what was once charming but nascent songwriting into poetic, knowing songcraft.

A fair amount of Dubb Nubb’s appeal came in the two-headed approach to the songs; listeners were never quite sure which sister was taking lead or writing the lyrics. But with the new quartet Shady Bug and its just-released debut tbh idk, Hannah Rainey has taken her first steps as a solo artist, setting aside her folk roots and casting her songwriting in a more rock-centric setting.

“I started writing solo songs in 2014,” says Rainey. “Some of them were more folky, and some were more hard rock, but I always wanted to start my own project that wasn’t Dubb Nubb to see what could happen with that.”

She’s been writing songs since her teenage years, but Rainey’s role in Shady Bug has caused her to stretch her musical chops. She’s set down her classical acoustic guitar for the time being and gotten familiar with a hollow-body electric, which she regularly pairs with the creamy undulations of a chorus pedal; that guitar tone covers many of the corners of these new tracks. “I’ve never played with guitar pedal — I never even owned an amp,” says Rainey with a laugh.

While Rainey had the itch to start her own project for some time, the creation of Shady Bug — and the recording and release of tbh idk — was relatively immediate. Rainey and Early Worm drummer Aaron ’ eill turned a casual am session into a full- edged band with the aid of a few friends from other acts.

Todd Anderson, who normally rocks a Rickenbacker in the mighty Vanilla Beans, takes a turn on the bass, and guitarist Tom Krenning, also of Persh, handles what Rainey calls the “dissonant, one-note melodies.”

Together, the quartet makes tight, tuneful rock songs that push Rainey’s voice past the soft, gentle confines of Dubb ubb. Rainey mentions some touchstones that helped inspire her new direction — Mac Demarco, fellow St. Louis native Angel Olsen — but much of the charm, for Rainey and for the listener, comes through the casual, unfussy comfort that the band deploys in creating these songs.

“We started at the beginning of December and had our first show at the end of December,” recalls Rainey.

Likewise, the group recorded its debut in a single eleven-hour stretch, using Krenning’s home/D.I.Y. show space on South Grand (known as “the Nest”) as studio space. Zach chimpf, a prolific solo artist in

MAY 3-9, 2017

riverfronttimes.com

his own right, served as engineer for the clean and kinetic recording.

That immediacy — of the band’s formation and this album’s recording — speaks to some of the emotional tenor of Rainey’s songs. A number of the eight tracks deal with the elation, frustration and ennui of young adulthood; the fumbles of modern romance appear more than a few times as well.

On “Sweet ’n’ Sour,” Rainey marries a rangy, sideways guitar lick reminiscent of early Talking Heads with the short story of an attraction that is either unrequited or left to rot on the vine. With a strong voice and just a hint of snark, Rainey spits out the album title’s text-message-shorthand — short for “to be honest, I don’t know” — as a quick, six-character summation of the situation.

“I liked it because it’s kind of a relatable thing,” Rainey says of the title. “It’s kind of humorous but it’s kind of mysterious. think it re ects the vibe of the album— being young and not knowing who you are and what you’re doing with your life.”

But if youth and young love remains a tangled web, Rainey’s longest-running relationship remains intact.

Dubb Nubb is still a going concern — the band released an album in 2015 and gigs regularly — and the specter of sibling rivalry is quickly brushed aside.

“That project probably won’t die,” Rainey says of Dubb Nubb. “I think it’s just really important for me and Delia — we’ve been doing it for so long. We don’t practice that much. We go on stage and we know what to do; it’s that weird twin connection, in a way. I feel like it makes us close to play shows together.”

Of her sister and musical partner, Rainey adds, “People always ask her if she’s jealous, and she says no.

She knows it’s always been a dream of mine to have this own pro ect. At our first show at B B, she even cried, she was so happy.”

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LEROY JODIE PIERSON: 7 p.m., $5. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314436-5222.

LITTLE RIVER BAND: 8 p.m., $47.50-$57.50. River City Casino & Hotel, 777 River City Casino Blvd., St. Louis, 314-388-7777.

MICHELLE WOLF: May 4, 8 p.m.; 7:30 & 10 p.m.; May 6, 7:30 & 10 p.m., $15-$31. Helium Comedy Club, 1151 St. Louis Galleria Saint Louis Galleria Mall, Richmond Heights, 314-727-1260.

MOTHERSHIP: w/ BrokeNeck, Spacetrucker 8 p.m., $10. Fubar, 3108 Locust St, St. Louis, 314289-9050.

MOUNTAIN SPROUT: 9 p.m., $10-$12. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-773-3363.

NATHAN GUNN: 7:30 p.m., $15-$35. The 560 Music Center, 560 Trinity Ave., University City, 314-421-3600.

THE PUNKNECKS: w/ Richie Darling and the

RIVERFRONT TIMES

MUSIC UNLIMITED: 8 p.m., $5. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-

Kevin Bowers 7:30 p.m. and 9:30 p.m., Friday, May 5 and Saturday, May 6.

Jazz at the Bistro, 3536 Washington Avenue. $20.

314-571-6004.

In 2016, local drummer Kevin Bowers wrote, orchestrated and performed a little Brazilian-tinged symphony with his release Nova. It was, in part, a love letter to the bossa nova records and Brazilian artists that inspired him, but the execution of the album was also a tribute to the many talented local St. Louis musicians Bowers has played

Diamond Cut Blues Band 9 p.m., $5. The Haunt,

50

MONDAY 8

MAY 3-9, 2017

riverfronttimes.com

alongside. Bowers lets friends including Paige Brubeck, Jimmy Griffin and Mike Aguirre take the lead on many of these songs, even though the steady percussive thrum of the tracks makes it a true drummer’s record. This weekend’s two-night stand at the Bistro will be a fitting setting for the dozen or so artists who will help bring Bowers’ vision to life.

New Year, New Stage: Last year’s release show at Off Broadway was bighearted and full of surprises. Bowers has promised more in store for this iteration.

—Christian Schaeffer

5222.

SOULARD BLUES BAND: 9 p.m., $5. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314621-8811.

TUESDAY 9 BLACKLITE DISTRICT: 8 p.m., $12-$13. The Firebird, 2706 Olive St., St. Louis, 314-535-0353.

ETHAN LEINWAND & GUESTS: 7 p.m., $5. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

THE GASLIGHT SQUARES: 8 p.m., free. HandleBar, 4127 Manchester Ave., St. Louis, 314-6522212.

JAMAICA LIVE TUESDAYS: w/ Ital K, Mr. Roots, DJ Witz, $5/$10. Elmo’s Love Lounge, 7828 Olive Blvd, University City, 314-282-5561.

JAMESTOWN REVIVAL: 8 p.m., $18. Old Rock

[CRITIC’S PICK]

Murphy’s Law 8 p.m. Saturday, May 6.

Fubar, 3108 Locust Street. $15. 314-289-9050.

Legendary New York hardcore group Murphy’s Law has been playing punk rock party anthems for more than 30 years, led by sole remaining founding member Jimmy Gestapo, who has played with a staggering list of backing musicians since the band’s inception — literally more than names. In this way, Murphy’s Law can be seen as the unlikely link between acts such as the Misfits, the Slackers, Thursday, the New York Dolls and about a

billion others whose musicians have lent a helping hand over the years.

Murphy’s Law’s live show is always a non-stop party, with huge sing-alongs, impromptu songs written on the spot about audience members and Jaegermeister that flows like water — mostly into Gestapo’s face.

Partners in Party: Fellow punks the Supermen, Opposites Attack and Boston Profit will open the show, so don’t spend your time pre-gaming in your car. The party is already inside.

THIS JUST IN

KIM MASSIE: 10:30 p.m., $10. Beale on Broad-

ADRENALINE MOB: W/ The Wild, Mental Fixa-

way, 701 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-7880.

tion, Sun., June 25, 6 p.m., $15-$18. Fubar, 3108

MATTHEW LOGAN VASQUEZ: 8 p.m., $12. Delmar

Locust St, St. Louis, 314-289-9050.

Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-

CODY CANADA & THE DEPARTED: Fri., July 7, 8

6161.

p.m., $15. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St.

THE ROYAL HOUNDS: 9:30 p.m., $10. BB’s Jazz,

Louis, 314-773-3363.

Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-

DIARRHEA PLANET: Thu., Aug. 3, 8 p.m., $15. Off

436-5222.

Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-773-

SIRENS & SAILORS: w/ Cynical Optimist 6 p.m.,

3363.

$12-$14. Fubar, 3108 Locust St, St. Louis, 314-

DR. ZHIVEGAS PERFORMING THE MUSIC OF

289-9050.

PURPLE RAIN: Fri., July 14, 9 p.m.; Sat., July 15,

WATCHING FOR FOXES: w/ Folk Family Revival 8

9 p.m., $15. Old Rock House, 1200 S. 7th St., St.

p.m., $8-$10. The Ready Room, 4195 Manches-

Louis, 314-588-0505.

ter Ave, St. Louis, 314-833-3929.

ESME PATTERSON: Wed., June 21, 8 p.m., $10-

WHITNEY: 8 p.m., $20-$22.50. Delmar Hall, 6133

$12. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis,

Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

314-773-3363.

IT’S A PARTY - ALWAYS!

FAIR ST. LOUIS 2017: W/ Akon, 3 Doors Down, Jake Owen, Dirty Muggs, SuperDuperKyle, Eve

BIG RICH MCDONOUGH & RHYTHM RENEGADES: 7

6, Sister Hazel, Ben Morgan, Matt Stillwell, Dan

p.m., $5. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broad-

+ Shay, Sun., July 2, 1 p.m.; Mon., July 3, 4 p.m.;

way, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

Tue., July 4, 1 p.m., free. Forest Park, Highway

BOB “BUMBLE BEE” KAMOSKE: 8 p.m. Beale on

40 (I-64) & Hampton Ave., St. Louis.

Broadway, 701 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-

FALL OUT BOY: Sat., Oct. 21, 6 p.m., $27.50-

7880.

$67.50. Scottrade Center, 1401 Clark Ave., St.

CAPTURE: w/ My Enemies & I, Dayseeker, King-

Louis, 314-241-1888.

dom of Giants, Broken Youth, Bury Odessa 6

HAVOK: W/ Wrecklamation, Tue., July 25, 6

p.m., $13-$15. Fubar, 3108 Locust St, St. Louis,

p.m., $13-$15. Fubar, 3108 Locust St, St. Louis,

314-289-9050.

314-289-9050.

EAST SIDERS REVIEW: 10 p.m., $5. BB’s Jazz,

JANET JACKSON: Sat., Oct. 21, 8 p.m., $29-$125.

Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-

Chaifetz Arena, 1 S. Compton Ave., St. Louis,

436-5222.

314-977-5000.

THE GROWLERS: 8 p.m., $20-$25. The Ready

JEFF ROSENSTOCK: W/ Laura Stevenson, Fri.,

Room, 4195 Manchester Ave, St. Louis, 314-

Aug. 4, 8 p.m., $13-$15. Delmar Hall, 6133

833-3929.

Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

SORORITY NOISE: w/ Mat Kerekes, The Obses-

JOSHUA RADIN: W/ Rachael Yamagata, Brandon

sives 7 p.m., $13-$15. The Firebird, 2706 Olive

Jenner, Fri., July 28, 8 p.m., $25-$28. Delmar

St., St. Louis, 314-535-0353.

Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-

WEDNESDAY NIGHT JAZZ CRAWL: 5 p.m. contin-

6161.

ues through Dec. 27, free. The Stage at KDHX,

KSHE 95 50TH BIRTHDAY PARTY: W/ Sammy

3524 Washington Ave, St. Louis, 314-925-7543,

Hagar, ZZ Top, Collective Soul, Andrew Hagar,

ext. 815.

ENCLOSED, CLIMATE CONTROLLED PATIO PAVILION

—Daniel Hill

House, 1200 S. 7th St., St. Louis, 314-588-0505.

WEDNESDAY 10

SOUTHERN ILLINOIS’ BEST DESTINATION BAR

LIVE MUSIC or DJ EVERY FRIDAY & SATURDAY HDTVs EVERYWHERE & ALL THE SPORTS

Continued on pg 42

riverfronttimes.com

MAY 3-9, 2017

RIVERFRONT TIMES

51

THIS JUST IN Continued from pg 43

THIS W ALEX AND

House, Fr

1200 S. 7t

THE ALLEY

Howard’s

314-349-2

AMORATH

Truth, Div

May 6, 7 p

St., St. Lou ARKELLS:

ry Hill - Th

University

BIG RICH M

Wed., May

Soups, 700 5222.

[CRITIC’S PICK]

BILLY BAR

X. | FRANK GARGANI

Delmar Hall, 6133 Delmar Boulevard. $30 to $35.

314-726-6161.

X is America’s greatest punk band, which means it deserves consideration for our greatest band, full stop.

With its first two albums, lo these 40 years ago, the Los Angeles quartet defined just how thrilling, how crafty and, most importantly, how enduring an American punk rock song could be.

The volatile chemistry of John Doe and Exene Cervenka, the delirious drive of DJ Bonebrake and the hooky riffage of Billy Zoom (the dude knows his Chuck

Louis, 314

BLACKLITE

X 8:45 p.m. Saturday, May 6.

BB’s Jazz,

$13. The F

Berry) echoed not the overseas punk vanguard of the ‘70s, but distilled the desperation, class consciousness and libertine sexuality of rock & roll in its earliest, most eternal form. It’s astonishing that the original quartet not only remains intact, but remains a shit-hot force of nature on stage.

Stepsisters in Arms: Mentored by Cervenka, Kelli Mayo and Peyton Bighorse form the core of Skating Polly, a riot grrrl throwback band that’s too snarling and catchy to be called nostalgic. Its opening set demands your early arrival.

—Roy Kasten

314-535-0

BOB “BUM

p.m. Beale

Louis, 314

BOO BOO D

May 6, 10

700 S. Bro

BRIAN CUR

Jazz, Blue

314-436-5

CALIFORN

$15-$23. O

Louis, 314 CAPTURE:

dom of Gi

Wed., May

Locust St, THE CARY

p.m., free

52

RIVERFRONT TIMES

MAY 3-9, 2017

riverfronttimes.com

Sat., Sept. 30, 5 p.m., TBA. Hollywood Casino

phen Push, Abraham & the Old Gods, Lenny

St. Louis,

Amphitheatre, I-70 & Earth City Expwy., Mary-

Mink Band, Andrew Drake, Sissy Brown, the

COMRADE

land Heights, 314-298-9944.

Sigmund Frauds, Sat., May 27, 3 p.m., $10.

shades, M

LAVENDER COUNTRY: W/ Sharon Hazel, Annie

Laclede’s Landing, N. First St. & Lucas Ave.,

6, 9 p.m.,

& the Fur Trappers, Justice Beats, Joss Bar-

St. Louis, 314-241-5875.

Ave., St. L

ton, Fri., May 26, 8 p.m., $10. Off Broadway,

PAUL THORN: Thu., June 1, 8 p.m., $43. The

DAN RUBR

3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-773-3363.

Sheldon, 3648 Washington Blvd., St. Louis,

MAJOR & THE MONBACKS: Wed., Aug. 9, 7

314-533-9900.

p.m., $10-$12. Old Rock House, 1200 S. 7th

PENTATONIX: Thu., Aug. 31, 8 p.m., $49.50-

St., St. Louis, 314-588-0505.

$95. The Fox Theatre, 527 N. Grand Blvd., St.

MELVINS: W/ Spotlights, Sat., Aug. 12, 8 p.m.,

Louis, 314-534-1111.

$20-$25. The Ready Room, 4195 Manchester

RAKIM: Fri., May 26, 8 p.m., $20-$25. The

Ave, St. Louis, 314-833-3929.

Ready Room, 4195 Manchester Ave, St. Lou-

MICHAEL MCDONALD: W/ Marc Cohn, Fri.,

is, 314-833-3929.

Nov. 3, 8 p.m., $26.50-$92. Peabody Opera

ROBERT EARL KEEN: Tue., June 6, 8 p.m.,

House, 1400 Market St, St. Louis, 314-241-

$35-$50. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St.

1888.

Louis, 314-773-3363.

MISSISSIPPI NIGHTS MUSIC FESTIVAL: W/ the

SHINEDOWN: W/ Lacey Sturm, Tue., July 11, 8

Steve Ewing Band, Bruiser Queen, Jeremiah

p.m., $42.50-$65. The Pageant, 6161 Delmar

Johnson, Old Capital, Jake’s Leg, Miss Jubilee

Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

and the Humdingers, Karate Bikini, NIL8,

SIR SLY: Sat., July 22, 9 p.m., $15-$18. Blue-

Dibiase, the Bob Band, Pik N Lik N, Bottoms

berry Hill - The Duck Room, 6504 Delmar

Up Blues Gang, Ultraman, Brother Jefferson,

Blvd., University City, 314-727-4444.

Trophy Mules, the Punknecks, Sweetie and

SOUTHSIDE JAZZ: Sat., May 20, 6 p.m., free.

the Toothaches, Sadie Hawkins Day, We Are

Howard’s in Soulard, 2732 S 13th St, St.

Warm, 33 in the Needle, Rocket Park, Ste-

Louis, 314-349-2850.

SAVAGE LOVE THE LEFTOVERS

BY DAN SAVAGE Nancy, the tech-savvy at-risk youth, two gimps, Christ on the cross, the Easter Bunny, two weeping women and the Easter Bunny’s smoking-hot leather master took to the stage at Revolution Hall in Portland, Oregon, for a live taping of the Savage Lovecast on Easter weekend. Audience members submitted their questions on cards (I take my questions like some of you take your men: anonymously) — but we didn’t get to many questions. So I’m going to answer as many of Portland’s questions as I can in this week’s column.

We’ve been sleeping with another couple for three months (first time my BF and I opened our relationship). How do I suggest full penetration with the opposite partner? At this point, we just do oral and that’s the “groove” we’re in.

Only-oral-with-others may be this couple’s preferred groove and the lane they want to stay in. If they’re only up for the “soft swap,” as it’s known in swinging circles, penetration isn’t gonna happen. But you should feel free to ask for what you want — at the very least, you’ll get some long-overdue clarity about their boundaries.

My girlfriend asked me to make out with another guy. Her fantasy. We met a really pretty gay boy at a house party, and so I made out with him. I got hard, and my girlfriend made a huge scene.

She says it was supposed to be for her pleasure, not for mine, and she’s still angry six months later and constantly

questions whether I’m really straight.

(I am!) What do I tell her?

Good-bye.

When do you know if it’s OK to insert your finger in your boyfriend’s butthole?

Without fear of freaking him out?

After you’ve applied lube to your finger and his butthole — which you’re allowed to do only after you’ve asked him if you can insert your finger in his butthole and after he’s consented to having your finger in his butthole.

I want to try anal, but I am scared of getting poop on my partner. Is an enema enough?

Properly administered, an enema should be more than enough. But with anal as with liberal democracy — a good outcome is not guaranteed. Sometimes you do your homework and your prep and everything still comes to shit.

I love my man, but we’re both tops.

What should we do?

Spit-roast very special guest stars if you’re in an open relationship, take turns/one for the team if you’re in a monogamous relationship, explore and enjoy your non-butt-penetrative options.

How do we play around with opening up our relationship as parents of a oneyear-old? We barely have enough time or enough sleep to keep our own relationship juicy.

Play around in theory for now — lots of dirty talk — and put theory into practice after your kid is a toddler and you’ve landed a reliable babysitter.

My girlfriend and I are pretty grossly in love and very affectionate, especially af-

ter we’ve just had sex. Should we make an effort to tone it down a bit around a third we’ve just fucked around with?

Or should we just be ourselves, and if they don’t like it, oh well?

Be yourselves — but make an effort to include your third in those oxytocin-infused displays of postcoital affection.

Unless your third was inconsiderate or creepy during the sex, or is anxious to go immediately after the sex (a sign you may have been inconsiderate or creepy), your third helped get you to that blissed-out state and deserves to bask a bit in the afterglow too.

Does the toe make a good substitute for the penis?

No. I have large breasts. My partners are either like, “YAY BOOOOBS!” or they ignore my breasts entirely. What is it with that? How do I get people to interact with my breasts like they’re another nice body part and not a bizarre thing?

By using your words. If there was a way you didn’t like to be kissed, presumably you would speak up rather than endure lousy kisses. Same applies here: “I have big boobs, and they’re great, and I love them — but ‘YAY BOOOOBS!’ makes me feel like I’m only my tits, which isn’t a nice feeling. That said, I don’t want my boobs ignored, either. The sweet spot really isn’t that hard to hit — enjoy my boobs like you would any other nice body part.” That said, some people really, really like big boobs and it’s going to be hard for them to contain their excitement. “YAY BOOOOBS” could be an understandable and forgivable first reaction on their part and an opening that allows you to have a conversation about bod-

53

ies, consideration, and consent.

Tell my boyfriend to go down on me!

If your boyfriend won’t go down on you unless some fag advice columnist tells him to — if his girlfriend asking isn’t good enough — then it’s you I want to order around (break up with him!), not your boyfriend.

My boyfriend is ten years older than me.

Also, he’s the first boyfriend I’ve had in ten years. I’m used to being single — and while he is great (sexy, amazing, smart), I feel like I’m losing parts of myself. I’m not doing the stuff my prior loneliness made it easy for me to do, creative stuff like open-mic nights. Do we break up?

You’re no longer lonely — you’ve got a boyfriend now — but you still need time alone. Even if you live together, you don’t have to spend every waking/ non-work hour with your boyfriend — it’s not healthy to spend every waking/ non-work hour with your significant other. But instead of heading to openmic night because you’re lonely and bored and have nothing else to do, now you’re going to go to that openmic night (and go alone) because you enjoy it, you need the creative outlet, and it’s healthy for a couple to have time apart.

Thank you, Dan. Five years ago, I was miserable in a sexless marriage. Tonight I’m here with my fabulous boyfriend and my hot sub. Thanks to your advice!

You’re welcome!

Listen to Dan’s podcast at savagelovecast.com. mail@savagelove.net @fakedansavage on Twitter ITMFA.org

STREAK’S CORNER • by Bob Stretch

riverfronttimes.com

MAY 3-9, 2017

RIVERFRONT TIMES

53

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100 Employment 110 Computer/Technical

Closed Loop Recycling, LLC seeks

Computer Systems Analyst

Mail resumes to: 5555 Manchester Ave., St. Louis, MO. 63110 Service Line Specialist (Nestlé Regional Globe Office North America, Inc. – St. Louis, MO) Prfrm tactcl governance of dvlpmnt mngd srvcs w/ int & ext partners. F/T. Reqs Bach’s dgr (or frgn equiv) in Comp Sci, Info Systs or rel fld & 2 yrs exp in job offrd or w/ ABAP prgrmm’g. All stated exp must incl: proj coordnatn; mgmt of “dotted line” resources & “virtual” teams; spprt’g SAP mods post implmntatn; mgmt & spprt of offshore Supplier srvcs & custom dvlpmnt actvts; troubleshoot’g issues in cmplx & heterognus enviro; SAP lndscps, intrface stratgs & tech actvts rel to prgrmm’g; SAP ABAP & WebDynpro dvlpmnt; MS technlgs dvlpmnt incl .NET, ASP & SQL; prep’g prsntns, brochrs & prototyps; &, train’g audiences incl funct’l anlysts, end-users or other tech anlysts in dif technlgs. Resumes: J. Buenrostro, Nestlé USA, Inc., 800 N Brand Blvd, Glendale, CA 91203.

JobID: SLS-SRO .

120 Drivers/Delivery/Courier

DRIVERS NEEDED ASAP

Requires Class E, B or A License.

S Endorsement Helpful. Must be 25 yrs or older. Will Train.

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183 Trades

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BE WELL, STAY WELL. Help others be well and stay well.

Build a business helping others get what they need and you WILL get what you need.

Escape the Stresses of Life with a relaxing

ORIENTAL MASSAGE & REFLEXOLOGY

We have bookings.

Call for information (314)781-6612 Mon-Fri, 10:00-4:30

Call the Musicians Association of St. Louis

Independent Reliv Distributor

Call (314) 223-8067 now for appointment

MUSICIANS Do you have a band?

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530 Misc. Services WANTS TO PURCHASE minerals and other oil & gas interests.

Send details to P.O. Box 13557 Denver, CO 80201

dated Bathroom, New Cabinets, New Windows, Dishwasher, C/A, Refinished Hardwood Floors, Appliances. Near Shopping and Bus Line.

300 Rentals 317 Apartments for Rent

SOUTH-CITY

DOWNTOWN Cityside-Apts 314-231-6806 Bring in ad & application fee waived!

Gated prkng, onsite laundry. Controlled access bldgs, pool, fitness, business ctr. Pets welcome MAPLEWOOD $425 314-443-4478 Cambridge Apartments Studio, all electric, appl, laundry room.

Close to MetroLink Station.

AFFORDABLE SENIOR LIVING

FILE BANKRUPTCY NOW!

HERITAGE SENIOR APARTMENTS

CALL ANGELA JANSEN 314-645-5900 BANKRUPTCYSHOPSTL.COM

NORTH COUNTY AREA 314-521-0388

www.LiveInTheGrove.com

RICHMOND-HEIGHTS $525-$575 314-995-1912 SPECIAL-1 MONTH FREE! Near Metrolink, Hwys 40 & 44 & Clayton.

1BR, all electric off Big Bend.

320 Houses for Rent

NORTH ST. LOUIS COUNTY 314-579-1201 or 636-939-3808 eatonproperties.com 2, 3 & 4 bedroom homes for rent. Sec. 8 welcome 365 Comm Rentals

RESTAURANT SPACE (314) 277-0204 John B. Myers House (National Historic Register) 180 Dunn Road at the intersection of 170 & 270 Barn Restaurant space available. Up to 5,000 sq ft.

SOUTH CITY $400-$850 314-771-4222 1-3 BR Apts. Many different units.

NO CREDIT, NO PROBLEM! www.stlrr.com SOUTH ST. LOUIS CITY 314-579-1201 or 636-939-3808 eatonproperties.com 2, 3 & 4 bedroom homes for rent.

Sec. 8 welcome SOUTH-CITY 314-504-6797 5052 Miami (West of Kingshighway) Renovated 1 BD with Enclosed Sun Porch, Up-

AUDIO EXPRESS!

Lowest Installed Price In Town — Every Time!

See Better!

Drive Safer!

Genuine LED Headlights!

Upgrades to fit most makes and models!

THE CHOICE OF A L AWYER IS AN IMPORTANT DECISION AND SHOULD NOT BE BASED SOLELY ON ADVERTISING.

From

9999

$

Save More When We Install It!

314-997-4224

Newly Renovated 1 Bedroom Apartments $510 Appliances • Energy Efficient Laundry On-Site

WESTPORT/LINDBERGH/PAGE $535-$585 314-995-1912 SPECIAL-1 MONTH FREE! Nice Area near Hwys 64, 270, 170, 70 & Clayton.

Patio, laundry, great landlord! Clean, safe, quiet.

OVERLAND/ST. ANN $535-$575 314-995-1912 SPECIAL-1 MONTH FREE! Great location near Hwys 170, 64, 70 & 270.

6 minutes to Clayton. Garage, Clean, safe, quiet.

168 inches of tri-color micro LEDs change colors with wireless control or sound activation.

Evenings 11939 Olive Blvd.

Creve Coeur

314-727-1444

2BR, new kitch, bath & carpet, C/A & heat. No pets.

NORTH-COUNTY $510 314-521-0388 Newly renovated 1BR apts for SENIOR LIVING. Safe and affordable.

FIRST MONTH FREE!

WANTED: DISHWASHER

Call 314-972-9998

FIRST MONTH FREE!

$795

Call (314) 223-8067 now for appointment

You’ll Come Away Feeling Refreshed & Rejuvenated.

314-223-8067

ST. CHARLES COUNTY 314-579-1201 or 636-939-3808 eatonproperties.com 2, 3 & 4 bedroom homes for rent. Sec. 8 welcome UNIVERSITY CITY

NORTH-CITY $300 314-921-9191 4008 Garfield-1BR apt. $300 deposit. ~Credit Check Required~

Save $100 On LED Underglow!

167 Restaurants/Hotels/Clubs

$550

Spacious 1 BR, 1st floor, c/a, wood floors, kitchen appliances, w/d hook up, ceiling fans. Across from park with fenced yard. Dining, shopping and bus close by.

Orig $299*

19999

$

Save More When We Install It!

Lightbars, spotlights and floods that really stand up to abuse!

Light Up The Darkest Road Or Trail!

SOUTH: 5616 S. Lindbergh • (314) 842-1242 WEST: 14633 Manchester • (636) 527-26811 HAZELWOOD: 233 Village Square Center • (314) 731-1212 Mon. - Sat. 9 AM - 7 PM; Sunday Noon - 5 PM Unless otherwise limited, prices are good through Tuesday following publication date. Installed price offers are for product purchased from Audio Express installed in factory-ready locations. Custom work at added cost. Kits, antennas and cables additional. Added charges for shop supplies and environmental disposal where mandated. Illustrations similar. Video pictures may be simulated. Not responsible for typographic errors. Savings off MSRP or our original sales price, may include install savings. Intermediate markdowns may have been taken. Details, conditions and restrictions of manufacturer promotional offers at respective websites. Price match applies to new, non-promotional items from authorized sellers; excludes “shopping cart” or other hidden specials. © 2017, Audio Express.

riverfronttimes.com

MAY 3-9, 2017

AUDIO EXPRESS!

RIVERFRONT TIMES

Lowest Installed Price In Town — Every Time!

55

RFT WEEKLY E-MAILS For an Inside Look at Dining, Concerts, Events, Movies & More!

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BULLETIN BOARD

CALL RFT CL ASSIFIED AT 314-754-5966, TO PL ACE AN AD DATING MADE EASY... LOCAL SINGLES! Listen & Reply FREE! 314-739-7777 FREE PROMO CODE: 9512 Telemates

EarthCircleRecycling.com

Earth Circle’s mission is to creatively assist businesses and residents with their recycling efforts while providing the friendliest and most reliable service in the area.

Call Today!

314-664-1450

EVANGELINE’S

NOW SERVING BRUNCH ON SATURDAY & SUNDAY! evangelinesstl.com

File Bankruptcy Now! Call Angela Jansen ~314-645-5900~ Bankruptcyshopstl.com

PRESENTS...

Murder in the Man Cave!

-----------------------------

Bring 5 friends & your ticket is

FREE!

-----------------------------

Visit gatewayescaperooms.com or call 314-270-9884

Made You Look!

Get the Attention of our Readers

Call 314-754-5966 for More Info

www.LiveInTheGrove.com DATING MADE EASY... LOCAL SINGLES! Listen & Reply FREE! 314-739-7777 FREE PROMO CODE: 9512 Telemates

Be still here T h e N at u r e o f t h e D i vi n e: M ay 1 9 - 2 1 , 2 01 7 N at u r e W an d er i n g as S p i r i t u al P r ac t i c e w i t h B eld en L an e: J u n e 2 - 4 , 2 01 7 D o g I s M y C o - P i lo t D ay o f R ec o llec t i o n : J u n e 2 5, 2 01 7

The Marianist Retreat & Conference Center Eureka, MO - (636) 938-5390 - mretreat.org

The Changing Pointe at

Patricia’s

patriciasgiftshop.com

Experienced carpenter/Painter

SOUTH CITY AREA MUST HAVE BASIC TOOLS $15-$20 / HOUR CALL 314-472-1393

evangelinesstl.com

File Bankruptcy Now! Call Angela Jansen ~314-645-5900~ Bankruptcyshopstl.com The choice of a lawyer is an important decision and should not be based solely on advertising.

LET US HELP YOU PUSH THE RIGHT BUTTONS!

Patricia’s

patriciasgiftshop.com

EarthCircleRecycling.com

Earth Circle’s mission is to creatively assist businesses and residents with their recycling efforts while providing the friendliest and most reliable service in the area.

Call Today!

314-664-1450

RFT WEEKLY E-MAILS For an Inside Look at Dining, Concerts, Events, Movies & More!

Sign up at www.riverfronttimes.com

Ultimate Massage by

Summer!

SWEDISH & DEEP TISSUE FULL BODY MASSAGE

The choice of a lawyer is an important decision and should not be based solely on advertising.

LET US HELP YOU PUSH THE RIGHT BUTTONS!

EVANGELINE’S

NOW SERVING BRUNCH ON SATURDAY & SUNDAY!

DAILY 10 AM - 5 PM

ALCOHOL & SUBSTANCE USE TREATMENT FOR ADULTS

South County/Lemay Area

314-620-6386 # 2006003746

DETOXIFICATION 4-WEEK RESIDENTIAL TREATMENT OUTPATIENT PROGRAMS MEDICATION-ASSISTED TREATMENT AFTERCARE • FAMILY SUPPORT

CALL 1-800-345-5407 24-hour Confidential Assessment with Caring and Compassionate Counselors. No Cost for the Initial Assessment.

Most Major Insurances Accepted.

Hope for a bright future

CenterPointe Hospital 4801 Weldon Spring Parkway St. Charles, MO 63304 AMANDAMINIDAYSPA.COM • 314-325-4876 4 SALLY DRIVE • MARYLAND HEIGHTS, MO BOOK ONLINE FOR THE BEST WAY TO GET AN APPOINTMENT

56

RIVERFRONT TIMES

MAY 3-9, 2017

w w w. C e n t e r Po i n t e H o s p i t a l . c o m riverfronttimes.com

HAS JUST ARRIVED IN ST. LOUIS! SAVE $5

When You Yse LYFT App For Your First Ride Use promo code DONALD80530