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HAVE A LAUGH ON US!

by DAVE BLAZEK

OFF THE MARK

by MARK PARISI

SPECTICKLES

2015***

by BILL ABBOTT

©2014 Bill Abbott / Distributed by InkBottleSyndicate.com

“Well .. okay then, in light of the recent developments with my partner, we’re just going to skip the part about using an opponent’s weight against him.”

AD 1 FRONT-COVER* 10M OPEN RATE: $500 9.85” X 3.25” = 32.01 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$383 8X-$360 12X-$338 *PREMIUM PLACEMENT AD (Front-Cover, Inside Front-Cover, Center-Page, Inside Back-Cover & Back-Page)

“We start your sleep apnea training tonight. Are you familiar with Pavlov’s dog?”

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FUNDAYMORNING.com

by BRAD DILLER

CHUCKLE BROS by BRIAN & RON BOYCHUK

© 2014 Copyright B&L Capital / dist. by InkBottleSyndicate.com

CAPTION CONTEST

Send your best caption to:

funnies.matsu@gmail.com and type “Caption Contest” in the subject line. The winning caption will be published with the winner’s name, age, city and state two editions later.

“nice picture. i’ll give you a thousand words for it.”

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AD 2A, 2B 1/2-SIZE AD* 2 ADS

AD 2A, 2B, 2C 1/3-SIZE AD* 3 ADS

10M OPEN RATE: $514 9.85” X 5.75” = 56.64 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$393 8X-$370 12X-$347

10M OPEN RATE: $260 4.85” X 5.75” = 27.89 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$199 8X-$187 12X-$176

10M OPEN RATE: $175 3.15” X 5.75” = 18.11 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$134 8X-$126 12X-$118

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WIZARD OF ID

AD 3 10M OPEN RATE: $105 3.15” X 4.15” = 13.07 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$ 80 8X-$ 76 12X-$ 70

by PARKER, MASTROIANNI AND HART

CREEK

by BRIAN MARTIN

*Strangely enough, Thomas Jefferson and John Adams, Founding Fathers and authors of the Declaration of Independence, died on July 4th, 1826. *The 4th of July wasn’t officially recognized as a holiday until 1870, when Congress finally passed a bill on federal holidays. *Calvin Coolidge, the 30th U.S. President, died on July 4, 1872.

EEK!

by SCOTT NICKEL

MOTHER GOOSE & GRIMM

by MIKE PETERS

G.A.B. ~ Grahams Advertisement Business Mike & Pam Graham Publisher gab@funnies-extra.com Mike: 907-521-7608 - Pam: 907-414-2561 4830 Crownerry Dr., Wasilla, AK 99654 Office Hours: 9-5 Mon-Thu, 9-2 Fri Ad Deadline: Friday Noon - 2 weeks prior to Print Date

EDITION #00 CAPTION CONTEST WINNER! THE GUILDE DE MERMAIDES FRANCAISE IS NOW SUING DUE TO HOSTILE WORKING CONDITIONS.

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JAMIE O’CONNOR - WASILLA, AK RATE GUIDE 2015 ǁ www.funnies-extra-anchorage.com ǁ FUNNIES EXTRA! ANCHORAGE EDITION ǁ 3

IMAGINE THAT

by BRIAN MARTIN

POP CULTURE SHOCK THERAPY by

DOUG BRATTON

HARA KIWI

© 2014 Brian Martin / dist. by www.InkBottleSyndicate.com

dist. by InkBottleSyndicate.com

©2011 Lectrr / dist. by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC

SUDOKU by MIA VONNE PUZZLES

Fill in the blank squares so that each row, each column and each 3-by-3 block contain all of the digits 1 thru 9 using logic.

Last Issue’s Solution:

WORD GAMES

AD 4 10M OPEN RATE: $210 4.75” X 5.75” = 27.31 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$160 8X-$151 12X-$141

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by LECTRR

FRANK AND STEINWAY

by WIL PANGANIBAN ©2011 Wil Panganiban / Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC

AD 5A 10M OPEN RATE: $114 3.15” X 5.00” = 15.75 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$ 86 8X-$ 82 12X-$ 77

by TOM GAMMILL

Distributed by nkBottleSyndicate, LLC

THE DOOZIES

*More hot dogs are consumed in the United States on the 4th of July, than any other day of the year.

BALLOON & DAISY

by BOB RICH

©2014 Bob Rich / dist. by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC

by RON THERIEN ©2014 Ron Therien / dist. by InkBottleSyndicate.com

AGAINST THE GRAIN

AD 5B 10M OPEN RATE: $114 3.15” X 5.00” = 15.75 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$ 86 8X-$ 82 12X-$ 77

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WORD FIND

BY MIA VONNE

GREEN THINGS

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©2014 Mia Vonne / dist. by InkBottleSyndicate.com

by CRYSTAL JONES

Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC

CRANKY GIRL

by BRIDGETT SPICER

dist. by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC

SQUID ROW

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AD 6B 10M OPEN RATE: $109 3.60” X 4.15” = 14.94 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$ 83 8X-$ 78 12X-$ 73

AD 7A - 10M OPEN RATE: $ 40 3.15” X 1.50” = 4.73 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$ 31 8X-$ 29 12X-$ 27 DINGERS

FUTURE SHOCK

by JIM & PAT McGREAL

by CAMPBELL & SCHOTSCH ©2014 Campbell & Schotsch / Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC

Join Funnies Extra! on FaceBook and Twitter!

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THAT MONKEY TUNE

by MICHAEL KANDALAFT

dist. by InkBottleSyndicate.com

AD 7B - FULL-SIZE AD - 1 AD

(To Split Into 2 Ads (7B-1, 7B-2), Multiply The Rates Immediately Below By .525 Rate Factor)

10M OPEN RATE: $325 9.85” X 4.38” = 43.09 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$249 8X-$234 12X-$219

------AD 7B-1 / AD 7B-2 / AD 7B-3 (1/3 SIZE ADS) - 3 ADS

10M OPEN RATE: $115 Ea. ~ 3.15” X 4.38” = 13.79 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$ 88 Ea. 8X-$ 83 Ea. 12X-$ 78 Ea.

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DOGS OF C-KENNEL

by MICK & MASON MASTROIANNI

HOLY MOLÉ

by RICK HOTTON

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THE NORM

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AD 8-9 HALF-PA 2 DOUBLE-T 10M OPEN 6.25” X 4.85” = FULL-C PREPAID 4X8X12X-

by MICHAEL JANTZE

HALF BAKED

8 ǁ FUNNIES EXTRA! ANCHORAGE EDITION

AD FULL CENTE 1 DOUBLE10M OPEN 6.25” X 9.875” FULL-C PREPAID 4X8X12X-

ǁ

by RICK ELLIS

RATE GUIDE 2015

AD 8-9A, B, C & D 4 QUARTER-PAGE ADS 10M OPEN RATE: $225 3” X 4.85” = 14.55 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$172 8X-$162 12X-$151

9A & B AGE ADS TRUCK ADS RATE: $325 = 30.31 Sq. In. COLOR D RATES: -$248 -$234 -$219

by ADRIAN RAESIDE

RALF THE DESTROYER

by SCOTT LINCOLN

dist. by InkBottleSyndicate.com

www.sunshinestatecomics.com © 2012 Graham Nolan

SUNSHINE STATE

THIS SPACE LEFT INTENTIONALLY BLANK

PICKLES

by GRAHAM NOLAN

Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC

8-9 ER-PAGE AD -TRUCK AD RATE: $600 = 61.72 Sq. In. COLOR D RATES: -$459 -$432 -$405

THE OTHER COAST

by BRIAN CRANE

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OPEN MOUTH, INSERT FOOT...

Brought to you by:

Jim Lein writes about adventure, life, music, and parenthood and has learned that most good stories don’t begin with, “and then I decided to keep my mouth shut.” His home in the Colorado Rockies serves both as an office and as a base camp for a variety of outdoor and musical activities. He has been published in numerous trade journals, business publications, and lifestyle magazines and is a regular contributor to Funnies Extra!.

OPEN MOUTH, INSERT FOOT

by Jim Lien

S

omeone once said, “I only open my mouth to change feet.” It’s become my life mantra. If I see a guy with one arm I ask him what happened. Most of the time they’re eager to tell you…occasionally not so much. Both reactions usually make good stories.

When I was a kid, I was the guy who sat in the back of the classroom and blurted out smart alec remarks. I thought myself to be witty and charming while the teachers secretly plotted my demise in the break room. There was an ongoing discussion over baloney sandwiches and reheated tuna casserole as to whether a farming accident could be arranged. After all every small town in Minnesota had a kid or two that had lost an arm or a leg to a grain auger or a Power Take Off. Limited control of my vocal eruptions carried into my professional career which was OK because most of it has been spent as a salesman.

People expect that sales guys will talk

too much—like lawyers are sleazy and bankers don’t work long hours.

With age—and a career change—I gained self awareness and crafted a few workarounds because it seems diarrhea of the mouth is an incurable condition. You can only learn to manage the symptoms. I’ve also learned there is no happy medium.

If I go to a party and resolve to be the quiet listener, everyone things I’m sick or my dog just died. I’m actually a trained listener and am capable of normal two way interaction for brief periods of time. My workaround for social gatherings is to move from group to group and actively engage in the conversation. About 5 minutes in, a little bell goes, ‘ding’, in my brain and I know it’s time to move to the next group. I never linger in one place long enough to be found out.

along with other dreadful recollections such as using the outhouse in the winter when I was a Minnesota farm kid. There is a of course the occasional relapse.

Typically, my loquacity is harmless albeit sometimes a bit annoying. However, on occasion I watch in horror as my lips start moving.

Oh no…what are they going to say?

Mercifully, our brains were designed to blot out all the most painful experiences. Thus, nearly all of my most embarrassing moments have been erased from memory

I raised my beer in a salute. “The way you ski, you give guys like us hope for the future.”

Years ago, I was lapping Chair 1 at my local ski resort with my friend JR. On each ride up, we noticed an older gentleman flying down the bump run under the lift, silver gray hair glinting in the spring sun. He was skiing with a couple of younger guys and matching our pace run for run. “Rip it up, old timer!” I yelled, as he skied below us on our last ride up. He waved in acknowledgement without missing a turn. Après ski in the bar, JR and I were enjoying a brew and reliving the days exploits.

The silver haired gent wandered in—recognized us and nodded a greeting.

“Thanks,” he said with a smile.

I should have stopped right there but my lips kept moving.

“There are a lot of older skiers here that can still make some good

AD 10B

10M OPEN RATE: $ 105 9.85” X 1.25” = 12.31 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$ 80 8X-$ 76 12X-$ 71 10 ǁ FUNNIES EXTRA! ANCHORAGE EDITION

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AD 10A

10M OPEN RATE: $ 30 1.75” X 1.50” = 2.63 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$ 23 8X-$ 22 12X-$ 20

turns,” I blundered forward. “But you’re still shredding the bumps and the steeps.”

A slight furrow creased his brow.

Warning, warning, Will Robinson.

“Well, I’m not as old as I look. It’s the hair. I turn 45 next month.”

That made him 6 months younger than me. Check please.

As a story teller, proud of my craft, I’m pretty sure that none of my best tales begin with, “I decided to keep my mouth shut.” I know many people that have been everywhere, done everything. Hiked the Inca Trail to Machu Piccu. Swam with dolphins in Thailand. Taught farming in Tanzania. But many keep their stories locked up inside because they don’t know how to tell them. I may talk too much but I also succeed in pulling many of those stories out of my tight-lipped friends for everyone to enjoy.

My columns aren’t always about a ‘stick my foot in my mouth’ moment. But most are the product of being both a good talker and a good listener. Time to move on. My socks taste like they need changing.

BIZ

by DAVE BLAZEK

AD 11A 10M OPEN RATE: $225 6.40” X 4.15” = 26.56 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$172 8X-$162 12X-$152 They would have to run it by legal, but Binkman’s new revenue idea was looking like pure genius.

by DANIEL BORIS

Distributed by ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC

HOXWINDER HALL

*If you keep going north, you will eventually have to go south. However, if you keep going east, you will never go west. *A mosquito has 47 teeth. *Bananas are slightly radioactive.

what a booger sees.

15 minutes

2013

dist. by InkBottleSyndicate.com

by ROBERT DUCKETT

idea submitted by:

louieSUBMITTED smith, wappapello, mo IDEA BY: submitSMITH, to www.15minutescomics.us LOUIE WAPPAPELLO, MO SUBMIT IDEAS TObottle WWW.15MINUTES.COM distributed by ink syndicate llc

15 MINUTES

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RATE GUIDE 2015 ǁ www.funnies-extra-anchorage.com ǁ FUNNIES EXTRA! ANCHORAGE EDITION ǁ 11

CRIME-QUIZ

by WERNER WEJP-OLSEN

THIN LINES

by Randy Glasbergen

©2014 Werner Wejp-Olsen / Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC

AD 12 10M OPEN RATE: $140 3.35” X 5.00” = 16.75 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$107 8X-$101 12X-$ 95 FUNNIES EXTRA, LLC

Kim Kellogg - Editor ~ editor@funnies-extra.com

CORPORATE OFFICE: 6822 22nd Avenue North, #134, St. Petersburg, FL 33710 (office) 727-343-1243 (fax) 727-343-4477 www.funnies-extra.com ~ info@funnies-extra.com

Bill Kellogg - VP Sales & Marketing sales@funnies-extra.com ~ 907-441-6882

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14

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AMAZING MAZES

10

11

6

12

LAST MONTH’S ANSWERS

AD 13 10M OPEN RATE: $230 5.25” X 5.85” = 30.71 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$176 8X-$166 12X-$155

by Sheila Anderson

Tastes LikeBYChicken JOSH ALVES

Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC

13

9

5

www.faceb k.com/tasteslikechickencomic

8

4

© 2011 wordgames.co.uk wordgames.co.uk

7

3

Distributed by Ink Bottle Syndicate, LLC

2

©2012 Josh Alves

1

LAST MONTH’S ANSWER: 32

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Cartoonist Sp tlight Funnies Extra! will shine the Spotlight on ‘toons from aspiring cartoonists and pay them too!

Comic strips and panels will be published from cartoonists of any age along with a pic and short bio.

Send each strip as a PDF file, 300 dpi, CMYK, along with your name, age, address and phone number. Send 10 color submissions to: submissions@funnies-extra.com and type “Spotlight” in the subject line. Good luck!

ONION & PEA by TOMASELLI & VILLENA

Distributed by www.InkBottleSyndicate,.com

AD 14A 10M OPEN RATE: $155 3.25” X 5.85” = 19.01 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$119 8X-$112 12X-$105

David Tomaselli & Jose Villena met in high school and have been working together ever since. Both reside in Spain.

About Onion & Pea

Leo was a normal boy with a normal life until two short and chubby costumed vegetable superheroes showed up: Onion and Pea! Now nothing will ever be normal again. These permanent companions make every day a weird adventure; from social catastrophes at school to mysterious expeditions and quests, to the endless peculiarities of a lively enlarged family. Take a big bite of Onion & Pea; it’s not what you’d expect, and it’s delicious. www.onionandpea.com

FORTUNE STREET by RANDY McILWAINE

AD 14B 10M OPEN RATE: $175 6.50” X 3.60” = 23.40 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$134 8X-$126 12X-$118 Distributed by www.InkBottleSyndicate,.com

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RATE GUIDE 2015

ACROSS

by MIA VONNE

8 Take off shoes 9 Elderly 1 Common girl’s name 10 Thin 6 Water (Sp.) 11 In concordance 10 Buddy 12 Peer (2 wds.)

13 American state 14 Sailor’s yes 15 Draped 21 Very large fruit 16 Gone by 23 Alerts 17 Computer storage 24 Air (prefix) 18 Stake 25 Musky 19 Not against 27 Church bench 20 Idyll 29 Owns 22 Wednesday 30 Annoying insect 24 Competition at the Greek games 31 Stick candy bar brand 26 Fencing sword 33 Hot looking 28 Domain 34 Opaque gem 29 Noodle 36 Legumes 30 Valley 37 Suppress 31 Rendezvous 38 Because of this 32 Fortify 39 Revelry 33 Coke 40 Sprite 34 Have 42 Pro 35 Soya 44 Male cat 37 Long letter 45 Narcotic 41 Extension (abbr.)

46 Muffle 42 Natural fiber 47 Redeem (2 wds.)

43 Movie 2001’s talking computer 48 Fish type 44 Not yesterday 50 Boat 47 Curl 51 Ties 48 Ride the waves 53 Spray weapon 49 Overt 55 By way of 50 Grassy area 58 Estimated time of arrival 51 Lay in the sun 60 To be 52 Noxious vapors 61 Ball holder 54 Vile 62 Goof 56 Villain 57 Hurt Answers to Last Edition’s Crossword: 59 Prisoner 63 Dined 64 Voucher for a small debt 65 Admirer 66 Decade 67 Bunsen burner 68 Fleer

AD 15 FULL-SIZE AD 1 AD (Inside Back Cover) 10 OPEN RATE: $350 6.50” X 5.75” = 37.38 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$268 8X-$252 12X-$236

AD 15A, 15B 1/2-SIZE ADS 2 ADS (Inside Back Cover) 10M OPEN RATE: $188 3.15” X 5.75” = 18.11 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$144 8X-$135 12X-$127

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SPEED BUMP

by DAVE COVERLY

THE DEEP END

by TYSON COLE

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CROSSWORD

DOWN

1 Mayan 2 Brew 3 Ewe’s mate 4 Crustacean 5 City in Ohio 6 Expression of surprise 7 Sharp-shooters

RATE GUIDE 2015 ǁ www.funnies-extra-anchorage.com ǁ FUNNIES EXTRA! ANCHORAGE EDITION ǁ 15

BC

by MASTROIANNI AND HART

AD 16 FULL BACK-PAGE AD -1 AD

10M OPEN RATE: $660 9.875” X 6.25” = 61.72 Sq. In. FULL-COLOR PREPAID RATES: 4X-$505 8X-$475 12X-$446

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