Listen to Your I
n the face of fear, we want to keep moving. To slow down and listen to what it might be saying is counterintuitive. But there is a logic—a language—to fear and anxiety just as there is to most emotions. Listening to fear is like listening to background noise. At first you think there is nothing to hear, but then you notice the wind in the trees, the birds calling for a mate, cars passing by, a plane overhead, creaks in the floors, and the water heater kicking in—there is much more going on than we first noticed! The same is true with fears. At first we might overlook the underlying message in our fears; but when we listen more carefully, we notice that they are speaking loudly about the things our hearts truly care about and love. Here are two common themes:
by
Ed Welch
“I am vulnerable.” We might not have Genghis Khan sweeping across the plains, prepared to destroy everything that moves, but life is dangerous no matter where we live. Even without a sworn enemy, the possibility of accidents gives us real reason to be afraid. Think of it this way: If we live long enough, something bad will certainly happen, and there is nothing we can do to keep it at bay. This is where fear gets interesting. Danger points at the threatening world around us. Vulnerability points to us. It’s about our lack of control. Take someone who is accustomed to driving, and put him in the passenger seat. Watch his foot nearly do a Fred Flintstone as he puts all his weight on an imaginary brake. And hear his ongoing suggestions for the driver. That’s a person who is feeling vulnerable—out of control, and thus afraid. Listening to this sort of fear reminds us that we are creatures, dependent on God and others around us. We have only limited control of the situations we face, no matter how much we wish it were otherwise. Here is where fear is a door to spiritual reality. It suggests that authentic humanness was never intended to be autonomous and self-reliant. Humans are needy—dependent—by design. Will we abandon the myth of independence and seek God?
10 LifeAction.org/revive
“I need (and might not get).” There is a close connection between what we fear and what we think we need. • • • •
If we need comfort, we fear physical pain. If we need approval, we fear criticism. If we need love, we fear rejection. If we need admiration for our attractiveness, we fear getting fat.
For example, money is believed to have unusual power to satisfy many of our needs, so it is a target for endless fears. Without money we feel vulnerable and powerless. With it we have confidence that we can get adequate medical treatment, love, respect, etc. For decades my wife and I never locked our house. We never thought twice about burglaries because we owned nothing that valuable—nothing we really loved. But as we