Philly Weekly 10-28-2015

ber 4, 2015

Novem October 28 -

s e i r o t S U O Y y b he

Opening t t s r i F f o t Vaul s t r A n o s r Pe

JOE BONAMASSA MON, NOV 9TH TUE, NOV 10TH TICKETS AVAILABLE AT: THEGRANDWILMINGTON.ORG Scott Mantz, Access Hollywood

Dreamers and Doers: DR. RUTH

Photo courtesy of Amazon Publishing

“A POWERFUL, IMPORTANT FILM.”

Monday, November 16 | 6 pm Join Dr. Ruth Westheimer as she shares her incredible story of survival and success, from fleeing Nazi Germany as a young girl to serving as a sharpshooter in the Haganah (Israel’s Freedom Fighters) to becoming the cultural icon adored and respected around the world today.

Moderated byWHYY’s Behavioral Health Reporter and Host of The Pulse, Maiken Scott.

Book sale and signing to follow the program.

Advance registration strongly encouraged!

Details and tickets at NMAJH.org www.SuffragetteTheMovie.com

EXCLUSIVE ENGAGEMENT STARTS FRIDAY, OCTOBER 30

ARTWORK © 2015 FOCUS FEATURES LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. MOTION PICTURE © 2015 PATHE PRODUCTIONS LIMITED, CHANNEL FOUR TELEVISION CORPORATION AND THE BRITISH FILM INSTITUTE LIMITED. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

CHECK DIRECTORIES FOR SHOWTIMES NO PASSES ACCEPTED

This series has been anonymously endowed by a friend of the Museum and admirer of all Dreamers and Doers.

Media sponsor: WHYY

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phillyweekly.com | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | Philly Weekly | 3

IN THIS ISSUE:

10 FEATURE First Person Arts Festival

14 FOOD & DRINK Kensington Quarters

15 STAGE BalletX Fall Series

16 MUSIC Top 10 shows this week

18 COMEDY Bill Burr’s got a new F-word

19 SCREEN Fassbender plays Steve Jobs

20 TIMAREE’S BODY Rappelling down a building 22 CLASSIFIED 274 REAL ESTATE

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Jacqueline Rupp Editor-in-chief jrupp@phillyweekly.com Twitter: @phillyjackie

Sheena Lester Arts & culture editor sheena@phillyweekly.com Twitter: @sheenalester

Anastasia Barbalios Managing editor anastasia@phillyweekly.com Twitter: @phillyweekly

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RPM PHILLY, LLC Publisher Perry Corsetti Philly Weekly is published Wednesday by RPM Philly, LLC, 1617 JFK Blvd. #1005, Philadelphia PA 19103. Phone: 215.563.7400. Distributed in Philadelphia, Delaware, Montgomery & Chester counties in Pennsylvania and selected other locations in southern New Jersey. Philly Weekly is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. Pennsylvania law prohibits any person from inserting printed material of any kind into a newspaper without the consent of the owner or publisher. Views expressed are not necessarily those of the management.

The publisher reserves the right to refuse any advertising.

Contents copyright © 2015 by Philly Weekly. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without the written permission of the publisher.

Photo by J.R. Blackwell

Philly Now

WHAT TO DO IN & AROUND THE CITY • MORE AT PHILLYWEEKLY.COM Tell us about your upcoming events! Email info to managing editor Anastasia Barbalios at: events@phillyweekly.com

STAGE

Awarding excellence: The Barrymores are back

T

he Barrymore Awards celebrate the Philadelphia region’s thriving theater community, a community as vibrant and diverse as the city that houses it. Sometimes referred to as Philadelphia’s answer to the Tony Awards, the program has been raising the bar in the local theatre scene since 1994. This year, a number of performances from theater companies beyond Philadelphia’s city limits, as well as some of the smaller theaters in the city, have stolen the ceremony’s spotlight.

Theatre Horizon in Norristown eclipses the competition with 19 nominations, 12 of which are for the company’s rendition of Stephen Sondheim’s fairytale-based musical Into the Woods. The production’s nominations include Outstanding Overall Production of a Musical and at least one nod in every acting category for musicals. In fact, three out of the four nominees for Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Musical come solely from Into the Woods. Theatre Horizon’s In the Blood, an urban satire inspired by Nathaniel Hawthorne’s The Scarlet Letter, has seven nominations.

Bristol Riverside Theatre’s Ragtime, a musical that tells the story of African-Americans, upper-class suburbanites and Eastern European immigrants in the early 20th century United States, has nine nominations, the second highest behind Into the Woods. People’s Light in Malvern boasts 14 nominations compiled from four differ-

4 | Philly Weekly | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | phillyweekly.com

ent productions: Fences, The Cherry Orchard, Bach at Leipzig and Arthur and the Tale of the Red Dragon. Also earning 14 nominations is Theatre Exile in South Philly, the self-described “place where local artists can take their biggest risks.” The cutting-edge company’s versions of Edward Albee’s Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? and Samuel D. Hunter’s The Whale are both nominated for Outstanding Overall Production of a Play.

The ever-occupied and exceedingly versatile Scott Greer is nominated twice in the Outstanding Leading Actor in a Play category for his performance as a morbidly obese gay man in The Whale and his role as a second-rate actor who idolizes Jackie Gleason in To the Moon (1812 Productions). Not to be outdone, a handful of artists are also nominated twice for acting awards: K.O. DelMarcelle (Detroit, The Taming of the Shrew), Campbell O’Hare (The Whale, Rapture), Liz Filios (Into the Woods, Passion) and Charlie DelMarcelle (The Glass Menagerie, The Jungle Book).

Johnnie Hobbs, Jr., a prolific actor in the local theatre community and influential acting teacher, will receive the Lifetime Achievement Award. —JOHN NEUMANN MCGUIRE

Mon., Nov. 2, 7pm. $75. The Merriam Theater at the University of the Arts, 250 S. Broad St. 267.761.9950. theatrephiladelphia.org

PHILLY NOW WedNesdaY, OctOber 28 eXPO

design on the delaware

Now in its 13th year, the annual three-day convention provides both networking and learning opportunities for the architectural and design communities, and a brand new partnership with the NeoCon East convention boasts even more excitement. Steve Dumez, director of design of the New Orleans-based architectural firm Eskew+Dumez+Ripple, will be the keynote speaker. 7:15am. $55-$400. Through Oct. 30.

SEE SOMETHING YOU’LL NEVER FORGET!

Philadelphia Convention Center, 1101 Arch St. designonthedelaware.com cOMedY

comedy for a cause

The fundraising event organized by Amanda Hoffman and benefitting local children in need features a comedy show, silent auction, food and happy hour. 5:30pm. $40-$52.

Helium Comedy Club, 2031 Samson St. 215.842.4800. heliumcomedy.com

tHUrsdaY, OctOber 29

readING

Noir at the bar

Join some of the best crime writers from our area for a night of selected short readings. Originally started in Philly in 2008, Noir at the Bar has spread to include events in San Diego, Toronto, Los Angeles, New York and Glasgow. Tonight’s reading includes noir heavy-hitters including Duane Swierczynski, Jon McGoran and Dennis Tafoya (pictured above), along with many others. 7pm. Free. Misconduct Tavern, 1511 Locust St.

misconducttavern.com aUtHOr

carrie brownstein

Co-founder, guitarist and vocalist of the influential girl band Sleater-Kinney, Carrie Brownstein reads from her memoir Hunger Makes Me a Modern Girl. The Portlandia star will discuss the book and her life of rock, comedy and feminist pioneering. 7:30pm.

$60. Merriam Theater, 250 S. Broad St. kimmelcenter.org staGe

all in the timing

A collection of six one-act plays written by David Ives in 1987, All in the Timing is a series of enchanting and hilarious stories focused in the randomness and relativity of the existence of black holes. 7:30pm. $20. L’Etage Cabaret, 624 S. Sixth St. 215.285.0472.

timing.bpt.me

FILM FESTIVAL 24TH PHILADELPHIA

OCTOBER 22–NOVEMBER 1, 2015 filmadelphia.org/festival

/philafilmsociety

@phillyfilmsoc #PFF24

/phillyfilmsociety

drINK

Whiskey & Fine spirits Festival

Hosted at the Lincoln Financial Field’s SCA Club, this year’s festival features more than 200 premium spirits from all around the world. Sample whiskey, scotch, bourbon, tequila, gin, rum and vodka while tasting some of Philly’s finest cuisine. 6:30pm. $25-

150. Lincoln Financial Field, 1 Lincoln Financial Field. phillymag.com/whiskeyfest phillyweekly.com | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | Philly Weekly | 5

ADVENTUROUS

“

PHILLY NOW FRIdAY, OCTObER 30

IN FORM AND THOUGHT, NOT JUST IN SUBJECT.”

Photo by Mark Garvin

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UNCANNILY BEAUTIFUL. THRILLINGLY REFLECTIVE.”

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STAGE

STAGE

Bill Cain’s Equivocation, directed by Terrance J. Nolan, centers around main character William Shagspeare, who must choose between writing the truth about a government coverup or pleasing his king. The comedic production is chock full of references to Shakespeare’s most famous works. 8pm. $15-$50. Through

Taibi Magar directs this retelling of the tragic Medea myth set in the twilight years of the 19th century. The musical chronicles a doomed heroine, consumed by love for an ambitious sea captain, as she journeys from New Orleans to Chicago. 7:30pm. $10. Arts Bank Mainstage

Equivocation

Dec 13. Arden Theatre Company, 40 N. Second St. ardentheatre.org MUSIC

The Revivalists

Artist: (circle one:) Emmett Heather Ronnie

Steve

AE: (circle one:) Carrie Jane Maria

The New Orleans seven-piece rock-soul hybrid brings their huge, engrossing sound to Philly. Memphis soul outfit APPROVED Gedeon Luke and the People opens. 8pm.

ART Josh AE APPROVED $17-$20. Union Transfer, 1026 Spring Garden St. utphilly.com Tim CLIENT APPROVED SCREEN

Confirmation #:

Philadelphia Film Festival: Closing Night Celebration For a chance to attend, visit PhillyWeekly.com/Contests NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. SUPPLIES LIMITED. ONE PASS PER PERSON. EACH PASS ADMITS TWO. MUST BE 13 TO ENTER. WINNERS WILL BE CHOSEN AT RANDOM AND NOTIFIED VIA EMAIL. EMPLOYEES OF PROMOTIONAL PARTNERS ARE INELIGIBLE. ALL DECISIONS ARE FINAL. THIS FILM IS RATED ‘PG-13’ FOR SOME INTENSE VIOLENCE, THEMATIC ELEMENTS, BRIEF STRONG LANGUAGE AND PARTIAL NUDITY.

IN SELECT THEATERS FRIDAY, OCTOBER 30TH 6 | Philly Weekly | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | phillyweekly.com

The 2015 Grand Jury and Audience award winners of the 24th Philadelphia Film Festival will be announced, and Where to Invade Next, the latest documentary by Academy Award winner Michael Moore (who’s scheduled to attend) will be screened. A masquerade party will follow the film in honor of Mischief Night and another successful festival.

8pm. $25-$50. Prince Theater, 1412 Chestnut St. filmadelphia.org/festival

Marie Christine: A New Musical

Theater, 601 S. Broad St. brindschool. com/shows/marie-christine PART Y

Philadelphia Museum of Art’s Halloween Party

DJ Diamond Kuts transforms the museum’s marble elegance into a thumping dance party, as Philadelphia U. fashion students strut the Great Stair Hall in artwork-inspired costume designs.

5pm. Free with admission. Philadelphia Museum of Art, 2600 Ben Franklin Pkwy.

215.763.8100. philamuseum.org PART Y

The Philadelphia Work of Edgar Allan Poe

The closing event party to CCP’s Edgar Allan Poe exhibit will feature Once More Theatre Company’s performance of “The Fall of the House of Usher” and a Poe-themed costume contest. 3pm. Free.

Community College of Philadelphia Bonnell Auditorium, 1700 Spring Garden St. 215.751.8000. ccp.edu

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Tickets now on sale at PhillyWeekly.com Crystal Tea Room Tuesday, November 10, 2015 6-9 pm

MICHAEL RISPOLI ANNABELLA SCIORRA AND TONY SIRICO PAUL BEN VICTOR

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NO COLLECTION TOO SMALL or LARGE WE BUY EVERYTHING! Call JON at 215-805-8001 or e-mail: bwsmusic@hotmail.com

ONE PART ‘SOPRANOS’, ONE PART SHAKESPEARE, TWO PARTS HILARIOUS!” MIKE SARGENT, WBAI RADIO © 2014 FAR PRODUCTIONS, LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

CITY EXCLUSIVE ENGAGEMENT UA RiverviewCENTER Plaza Stadium 17 & RPX STARTS FRIDAY, OCTOBER 30 (844) 462-7342 #650 Q & A WITH MICHAEL RISPOLI AND FILMMAKERS

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PHILLY NOW SaturdaY, OctOber 31 HaLLOWeeN: Scare uP SOMe FuN FrIGHt

terror behind the Walls

The grand dame of the local terror scene at Eastern State Penitentiary still stands as the go-to spot in the city to be scared witless. But for all you veterans who’ve survived the tour over the years, new this year are “Inside Quarantine 4D,” a bad trip without the drugs, and “Break Out,” which lets you experience all the fun of a prison break, or lack thereof. Various times. $13-39.

Eastern State, 2027 Fairmount Ave. easternstate.org drINK

the devil’s crawl

Haunt more than 20 locations in Center City this Halloween for one wristband price. Stops include Bonner’s Irish Pub, Cavanaugh’s Rittenhouse and Drinkers (for when you’re feeling fancy). Increase your odds of having your Pizza Rat costume win a prize, with multiple spots hosting costume contests. $10.

Multiple locations. upcomingevents.com Part Y

Henri david Presents: the Halloween ball

Now in its 47th year, the ball once again challenges our costume creativity. Contest categories are serious business here and include awards for Most Hysterical, Most Horrifying, Most Original Couple, Most Sensual Fantasy, Best Celebrity Look-a-like, Most Believable Female Impersonator, Most Beautiful Impersonator, Most Unbelievably Spectacular, and new this year: Best Comicbook Character. $25 for those in costume, $60 for voyeurs.

Sheraton Philadelphia Downtown, 201 N. 17th St. bOOKS

Halloween at the rosenbach: a Literary costume Party Photo by Ruven Afandor

StaGe

twyla tharp: 50th anniversary tour Celebrating 50 years of dance, legendary choreographer Twyla Tharp presents three new pieces performed by her amazing company of dancers. The night opens with First Fanfare, followed by Preludes and Fugues, and concludes with the debut of Yowzie. 8pm. $30-$75. Through

Nov. 1. Annenberg Center Live, 3680 Walnut St. annenbergcenter.org

sion on comics in fine art contexts. The fun continues on Sunday with a pancake brunch. Through Nov. 1. $20. Various locations.

locustmoonfest.com WaLK/ruN

rock and roll Half Marathon

The race begins on the Parkway and makes a long trek through Center City to the Falls Bridge and back, featuring local musical acts along the way. 7:30am. Eakins Oval, Fairmount Park. run-

rocknroll.com/philadelphia PerFOrMaNce

FeStIVaL

Locust Moon comics Festival

Back for a fourth year, the independent comic expo celebrating comics, illustration and the graphic arts features a star-studded guest list, including Craig Thompson, Mark Beyer, Chris Claremont, Noah Van Sciver, David Mack and Bill Sienkiewicz. Extended for three days for the first time ever, the festival kicks off with Drink & Draw at the Philadelphia Museum of Art on Fri., Oct. 30. On Saturday, the fest features comicmaking workshops, a panel on underground comics, “Draw on Life” with Craig Thompson, Dean Haspiel and Andrea Tsurumi, and a discus-

tablao Philly

Pasión y Arte, Philadelphia’s all-female flamenco dance company, presents Tablao Philly, a unique flamenco performance also featuring De Luna a Lunares and La Meira. 8-11pm. Asian Arts Initia-

It’s a book nerds Halloween, so come dressed as your favorite literary character. Strong biases and bonus prizes for Alice in Wonderland characters. 6pm. $10-$20. Rosenbach Museum and

Library. 2008 Delancey Place. rosenbach.org ScreeN

Halloween Screenings

Watch two spooktacular films courtesy of International House this Halloween. Start the day with the family-friendly Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit at 2pm, and then leave the kids at home for the horror classic Vampyr at 7pm. $5-$9.

International House, 3701 Chestnut St. ihousephilly.org Part Y

day of the dead: día de los Muertos

Celebrate the Day of the Dead with Penn Museum and the Mexican Cultural Center and Mexican Consulate in Philadelphia. Featuring puppetry, music, dance, storytelling, paper mache, sugar skull and mask making, special foods and more more, the centerpiece of the event is the Day of the Dead altar to be created by renowned Philadelphia artist and muralist Cesar Viveros. 11am. $15. Penn Museum, 3260 South St.

tive, 1219 Vine St. pasionyarteflamenco.org

mexicanculturalcenter.org

StaGe

MuSIc

Based on Margret Atwood’s novel, this onewoman play brings to life one woman’s struggle to increase population growth while also shedding light on society’s fears of fundamentalism.

A spooky night of music, pumpkin painting, trick or treating and fire juggling brought to you by Sexton SideShow. Music starts at 7pm with Nirvana cover band Practically in Utero and continues with the sounds of Muswell Phillbillies, The Primaries and Shy Boyz. 5pm. $10. Gloria Dei Old Swedes Church, 927 S.

the Handmaid’s tale

8pm. $15-$25. Through Nov. 14. Curio Theatre Company. 815 S. 48th St. curiotheatre.org

8 | Philly Weekly | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | phillyweekly.com

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african dance Party

Listen to the afro-pop-jazz-roots sounds of Sharon Katz & The Peace Train as they host a concert and dance party to celebrate the release of their award-winning film When Voices Meet. The concert will also feature guest appearances from Monnette Sudler, Bert Harris and more. 11:30am. $15. World Cafe Live, 3025 Walnut

St. 215.222.1400. worldcafelive.com

You know you want it.

sPorTs

Philly Kickball

Start the fall season on the right foot by joining the Philly Kickball team. The league is currently accepting new teams and players for its fall 2015 season. The league meets Sundays, with games running from 3-6pm. Potential members must be at least 21 years old and adhere to an explicit no-whining policy. 3pm. 600 Lombard St.

phillykickball.net

moNday, November 2 oN THe ouTsKIrTs

LeGo Castle adventure

Enter a LEGO kingdom, where kids can build their own castles, test defenses with a catapult, joust on horses and climb a lookout tower. The exhibit is divided into three age-appropriate areas—Apprentice (toddlers), Journeyman (age 3–6) and Master Build (ages 7 and up). Through Jan. 17. Mercer Museum, 84 S. Pine St., Doylestown.

215.345.0210. mercermuseum.org

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searchlight series at eastern state Penitentiary

Historian Jen Manion will discuss the penitentiary system in early America and the dramatic growth of the U.S. prison system over the past 40 years. 6pm. Free. 2027

Fairmount Avenue. 215.236.3300. easternstate.org sTaGe

mary b. robinson: disgraced

The Suzanne Roberts Theatre will host the 2013 Pulitzer Prize-winning play, which profiles a successful Pakistani lawyer and his wife, a painter inspired by Islamic imagery. When they host a dinner party at their home, conversation ignites, revealing disturbing secrets. 6:30pm. $46-$52. Suzanne Roberts Theatre. 480 S. Broad St.

215.985.0420. philadelphiatheatrecompany.org

WedNesday, November 4 auTHor

Kermit roosevelt

Award-winning author and University of Pennsylvania professor Kermit Roosevelt discusses his new novel Allegiance, which delves into the constitutionality of the U.S. government’s decision to imprison thousands of Japanese-Americans during World War II. 6:30pm. Free. Central Library, 1901 Vine St. 215.685.6621. freelibrary.org

sTaGe

Watership down

John Hildreth’s family-friendly adaptation of Richard Adams’ cult-classic follows rabbits Hazel and Fiver as they lead a group of bunny refugees on a quest to find a new warren. Featuring puppetry by Aaron Cromie and Lorna Howley. Through Nov. 22.

Mandell Theater, 3141 Chestnut St. simpaticotheatre.tix sTaGe

The mandrake

Philosopher Niccolò Machiavelli’s classic play follows a young man who falls in love with the wife of the town’s elderly lawyer. Directed by Alexander Burns. Through Nov.

8. Sedgwick Theater, 7137 Germantown Ave. quintessencetheatre.org phillyweekly.com | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | Philly Weekly | 9

Stage

A T

he always captivating First Person Arts Grand Slam is now in its 15th year. That’s a decade and a half of the best regular-Joes-andJanes in the city going head-to-head on area stages to win bragging rights for being crowned “the best storyteller in Philadelphia.”

But the real heft in FPA’s monthly yarn-spinning contests isn’t in the actual competition; it’s in the tradition that FPA has created: giving Philadelphians of every age and stripe an open stage and a mic—and a chance to tell their very real, very personal and very entertaining first-person accounts. In homage to the spirit of storytelling, we share with you some of our favorite stories (Yes, it was painful to choose!) from past years’ slams. Enjoy, and don’t forget the Grand Slam hits World Cafe Live on Thurs., Nov. 5th.—By JACQUELINE RUPP

For Our

Stories

First Person Arts & the Art of Storytelling

In 2011, I discovered YouTube, and I fell in love with it. I spent an unhealthy amount of hours watching WheezyWaiter, vlogbrothers, Jenna Marbles. And I So, naughty or nice. I’m actuwas like, This. This is going to be the way that I can perform because if you mess up, ally gonna start my story at you can delete it, and no one will know that you sucked. So, I took the first step to the end, then I’m gonna circle YouTube, which is buy a ukulele. And I learned three cords on the ukulele, back and kinda frame it up for and I did an Ingrid Michelson cover online. And nobody watched it. I know, you, okay? why? I was so frustrated, so I went back to YouTube, and I watched So, the way this story ends like a million more videos. And I’m like, looking for, like, the secret. is Thanksgiving day, I had a naHow do I do this? How do I make, like, a wonderful YouTube vidked man feeding me pie. I think eo and get famous on YouTube? that’s beyond nice. I mean, I And so, I found this guy, and he was really funny, and think that is the most sublime he had, like, a lot of subscribers—and you guys, he went to my experience possible on this college. He was going to my college. So I made it my goal that planet, you know? I told that stoI was going to run into this guy at college and, like, become ry to my roommate, and she was best friends with him and learn the secret to YouTube. So I like, “(Gasp) What kind of pie?” watched all of his videos. There were a lot. And I learned a lot Yeah, so let me circle back about him. Like, I learned that he was a math major, so I went to because I want to tell you, I have to the math building and sat there reading—you know, lookin’ cute. tell you: I am married. Yeah, I know.

Married 30 years. I mean, I don’t have a And I kind of found out where he lived; like, I recognized the apartring, you’ll notice. I have a dent because what ment that he lived in because some of my friends lived there. So I was, like, happened is I came home about nine months ago hangin’ out with those friends a bit more, and so I was like, “Hey guys, do you and found the FBI was taking away my husband in handcuffs. want to, like, go hang out in the entrance of your apartment building? Like, I know, didn’t see it coming. Didn’t see it coming. You know, I was kinda in do you need to go smoke a cigarette outside, like, near the entrance to shock, I’m embarrassed to admit—like, the only thing I could think of in the your apartment building?” But I never ran into him; like, I never forcmoment to say was like, “Wait a minute! When’s trash day?” I swear that you ibly ran into him, and I was giving up hope on being famous on don’t process this stuff all at once. You don’t. It turns out he was using the Internet YouTube. to arrange to have sex with a teenage girl.

So, one day, I was leaving my philosophy class, Naughty.

Beyond naughty. Depraved, you know. And it’s like, okay, I didn’t see it coming. and completely unexpectedly, I got in the elevator, and You know? Didn’t see it coming because I didn’t marry a bad boy, you know what I’m saying? I he was in the elevator … and I was, like, not prepared married a professor. You know, that trade-off that we make in our 20s, where you, like, give up for this, and I didn’t know what to do, but I, like, the idea of ever having fun again, and in return, you have, like, stability and a Toyota Prius. But needed to talk to him. So I just went “Internet!?” that’s not how it played out, ya know.

And he was like, “Yeah!” I rode the elevator all So, I had to go see him, like, where he is now actually, which is at the Federal Detention the way down with him to the first floor, and we Center at 7th and Arch. You guys know that building? Which I think is kind of ironic to have a deleft the elevator, and we walked our separate tention center there, because it’s like Northern Liberties, but without the liberty. So, he’s there, ways—and I decided to write a blog instead.— and it’s hard to get in. You have to be processed; it takes about a month, the paperwork. Then, MARY, from “Awkward” 10 | Philly Weekly | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | phillyweekly.com

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there’s all these rules. Like, if you go on the website, it’s like: no short skirts, nothing low-cut, nothing too tight, no hats, no scarf, nothing green … It’s like, nothing green? I called and asked, “What’s up with that?” And they said, “Well, that’s what the prisoners wear.” I’m like, “So what? You’re afraid we’re gonna clash?” Like, ya know, clear the yard—I can’t even look, I can’t even look.

Well it was hard to get in, too, because I kept setting off the metal detectors. Like BOOP! I’m like “What?” BOOP! “What?!” And there were, like, these mafia wives in the waiting room, and they’re like, “Honey, are you wearing an underwire [bra]?” It’s like, you gotta run to Kmart and get a different brand. It’s like it gets to be kind of a community in the waiting room of the detention center because everybody goes up to the machine, and we’re all like, taking off our bling, ya know, and we’ll all be like “C’mon, Latisha, you can do it!”

So, [I] get in, and this is what he says to me. I finally get to see him, and he goes, “Margie, I wanna make it up to you.” How do you make that up to somebody, ya know? You were trying to have sex with a teenager.

It’s like, what are you gonna do? Bang an old lady and split the difference?

What are you gonna do, ya know?

So, he’s like, he’s sitting there, and he sees all these double-decker buses go by from his window, and he’s like, “I want to take you on a double-decker bus ride.” Yeah … I’m like, “Yeah, that’ll do it.” I’m like, “Let me think about it.” Who gets the window? It’s like, what kind of … But it didn’t hit me. It didn’t hit me, like, ‘cause if you ever go through something like this, you gotta, like, process the practical stuff first— like I didn’t even know how to change the CD in the Prius, and it’s like, he’s looking at 10 years. That’s a long time to be listening to, like, Paul Simon, ya know, “Concert in the Park.” Like, I know all the words to “Me and Julio,” you know?

So let me get to the point.

Finally, I crash. Finally, it’s like, what do you do? Finally, it hits you—like what do you do with all this anger and sadness? What do you do?! Ya know, now that Oprah’s not on the air? So, I went to a blues bar, ya know, it was in Chestnut Hill so, like, the musicians, like, they’d never been through anything, so they were like, “(singing, blues lick) Bum-buh-buh-bum. I’m mildly inconvenienced.” So I was like, “Sing, like, a different song!” and then they were like, “Shut up!” so I was like, “Well, give me something to wallow in!” and I got thrown out. And I was like, “Is this the lowest point? Getting thrown out of a blues bar for being too sad.”

But the point is that you start putting your life back together.

And I went to a party, and I met somebody—and let me just say: He’s a little freaky, and he’s Jewish, and he bakes.

So, the moral of this story is if your life ever falls apart, and you hit your lowest point ever, if you can just keep your head up high, and if you can just keep love in your heart, at the other end, there might be a naked man feeding you pie.—Winning storyteller MARJORIE, from “Naughty or Nice” I was on the way to the airport with my grandfather to pick up a relative when he asked me how I felt about religion. I was 11 years old at the time, so I was cautious in my response. I said that even though religion wasn’t perfect, it seemed to make people behave well. He wasn’t happy with my answer. That’s when I found out that my grandfather was an atheist who disliked all types of deities, psychics, mystics, horoscopes and pseudoscience. As a professor of engineering, he hated pseudoscience most of all.

I didn’t know this about him before because, for the most part, he went along with all the religious customs in the town that he lived in in southern India. He would take me and my grandmother to the temple every Thursday for a particular ceremony where they had an elephant walk around in a circle as a procession followed behind it, chanting. The poor chained elephant would occasionally pause to defecate unabashedly as everyone continued chanting. We’d make our way, avoiding the elephant dung behind it.

I can only imagine that my grandfather was trying to think about physics the entire time we were at these events, but in private, he would always speak his mind about religion—and continues to do so to this day, as he’s 81 years old. I, for most of my childhood, did not reject religion, and when I was in high school, I still thought that, even though there have been so many horrible things done in the name of religion, there had to be some good in it since it had been around for so long.

Then in my junior year, the Christian club at our school invited

12 | Philly Weekly | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | phillyweekly.com

a speaker. The event was advertised as a debate, but featured one disheveled preacher shouting at the audience and inviting an argument.

“Mount Rushmore was not created by a series of random mistakes!” he said. “It was designed, and you were designed.” I was completely shocked at this and that he would say something like that, especially since I’d been learning biology.

He ran into our biology teacher actually as he left the school and accused him of being a bad Christian because he taught evolution, and he, this preacher, also passed out material on a public school campus about his religious beliefs. And I mentioned it to a classmate later how ridiculous this all was, and she said, “Well, you know, I don’t think people come from monkeys either.”

And that’s when I realized that maybe my grandfather had a point. And that religion wasn’t just a harmless pastime, that it was doing some serious damage and was, in fact, a threat to science. As a species, when we were young, religion was like a security blanket and, as we mature, it’s time to discard it and progress as a society.— LAKSHMI, from “Evolution” The heroes I have to tell you about are not uniformed personnel. They’re not. They’re not athletes. The heroes I’m going to tell you about are lions.

Thirty-five years ago, the Philadelphia Zoo sponsored a trip to Kenya to visit three game parks over 10 days. The next thing I knew, my wife and I were landing in Nairobi spending the night and getting into a Volkswagen micro-bus going out into the bush, where there were lovely hotels and protected spaces. Now we go out, and by the way, people think of game parks as a zoo. Let me tell you: It’s not a zoo. In a zoo, the animals are on your turf. In a game park, you are on their turf. In a game park, you are in the cage. Now, the cage has wheels, but it’s still a cage because if you get out of that cage, you’re somebody’s lunch.

Now, the animals are lively in the morning and the evening. Midday, they all sleep. So do I, actually.

So, the van’s at sunrise; you get in the van and go out to see what there is to see. Well, I’ll tell you the wonders that we saw: herds of elephants and ze-

bra, beautiful giraffe floating across the plain, rhinos and baboons. Let me tell you: If the game parks in Africa are not on your bucket list, put them on now. It is a fantastic trip. But one more thing: At sunrise, we’re in the van waiting for them to open up the gates, and I asked our driver, “What are we gonna see today?” And of course I was joking, you know— what are you gonna see? You’re gonna go out there and see what there is to see. But he turned to me and said, “Today, my friend, we are going to see a pair of mating lions.” And I said, “Mating lions? How do you know that?”

And he says, “I see you’re not wise in the ways of life. You see, my friend, when the lioness comes into season, the male lions compete for her attention, and usually it’s the big king lion who wins. And the two of them go off together for as long as she is in heat.

Now, they don’t eat. They don’t hunt.

They do nothing but mate for 10 days.

Every 20 minutes.”

Well, the sun rose, and we got in our micro-vans, and we’re shooting out, and he says, “I knew you call these honeymoon couples. I studied a honeymoon couple just yesterday. I know exactly where they are; we’re going to go right there. We’ll be the first car there so we’ll be alone with our honeymoon couple.” So right as the gates opened, we shot out straight as an arrow. We got where we wanted to go. We went up to a grassy knoll, and about 30 yards ahead of us were a magnificent pair of lions, male and female, lying side by side. I had my super movie camera taking pictures, and within five minutes, the big male got up, stretched, gave a little roar, got behind the female, mounted her, and did his thing. And you can see this on the National Geographic channel.

Only took about a minute. At the very end, he leaned forward and kissed her behind the ear, and I was very touched and moved; I thought that was very tender. So, then he hopped off and laid down next to her. Meanwhile, other vans had come up, and other cars were there, so we went through. But let me tell you—let me tell you—any animals that can mate for 10 consecutive days every 20 minutes are true heroes in my book.— IRV GROSS, from “The Call of the Wild” You know that kid in high school? He’s really good lookin’, really good at sports, runs his mouth all the time?

Well, I wasn’t that kid. But I knew that kid, and his name was Andrew Boyle.

Everyone just called him Boyle because he had the personality of a festering wound. I was an art kid in high school, and I had red hair, which

tle our beefs. This is when every kid in lacrosse would line up, and one kid steps up and calls out another kid, and the kid that gets called out has to pick up the ball and try to run, dodge, get past the caller outer and score.

And when someone gets schooled, the team goes nuts, and you don’t live it down for weeks. And I never participated in this ‘cause I wasn’t really good, but today was special because I had just gotten this brand new stick, and I was contemplating murder. And so I step up, and I call out Andrew Boyle—and the team goes berserk, the team goes nuts. This is an unprecedented event. This is David versus Goliath. So, Boyle looks at me, and he smiles, and he puts his helmet on, and he picks up the ball, and I know what he’s going to do. He does this one stupid dodge every time. He runs up, he spins, he throws his arm up, and it’s horrible, and I knew he was going to do this—and when he does, I am going to decimate him and shut his stupid mouth in front of everybody. So I am ready, and I am down. He starts his run, and he gets faster and faster, and he doesn’t stop. He plows square into my body, and I feel this crunch on my chest as I’m sent through the air like a weightless ginger rag doll, and I’m gasping for breath on the ground, and I hear the dolphin laugh. As I’m looking up into the sky, I see Boyle step over my dead body and place the ball into the goal. I get up and the team has lost their shit, and everyone is laughing— even the coach is pointing and laughing. And Boyle’s in front of me out of arms reach just in tears of laughter pulling down on my stick, and I look down. He had hit me so hard that my brand new metal stick had bent in an L shape over my chest. So, as I walked back to the locker room dragging my broken stick and my shattered self-esteem, I heard from a distance fading over the laughter: “Firebush!” Next time, Boyle. Next time.—Multiple Story Slam winner, OTIS GRAY, from “Next Time”

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made our relationship a little complicated. But most of the complications came from me being the kind of kid who would grow up and peep in a storytelling competition, but I did play a lot of sports in high school. I played soccer. I was on the crosscountry ski team—yes, that is a thing in Vermont. And I played lacrosse.

And Boyle played football, hockey and also lacrosse. So we played midfield together, except he was always on first string because he was really good, and I was on third string because I knew what tertiary colors were. Boyle and I had known each other since middle school; he was a jock and I was more of a geek, so I got picked on. But I grew up in the deep woods of Vermont, so while Boyle was playing pewee hockey with his friends, I was learning how to cage fight. So I got picked on, but I could throw down when it came to it. I think this gained just a little bit of respect between Boyle and me, but as we got into high school, Boyle got Boyle-ier, and I hated him even more in class because, get this, he was incredibly smart. He was naturally really intelligent, so you would call him out because he would act like a baboon most of the time, and he would just humiliate you with logic, and he would point and laugh, and he had this awful laugh—it sounded like a dolphin. And he’s the kind of kid that would, like, find out when the teachers birthday is and buy her, like, scented candles and would pants you in her class while you gave a presentation. So, Boyle and I were nemeses.

But the plot thickens. See, Boyle and I secretly liked each other.

‘Cause I knew under the sludge coating which was his heart was actually a good kid, and even though he called me an art fag, he respected my talent. And our grandparents lived really close to each other, so once in a while, we actually hung out, but we didn’t tell anybody ‘cause we were nemeses. And in public, I could deal with his insults and his rants. I just let him run out of steam, and then I’d go about my day. But there was one word, one insult that got me every time, and he knew it. He would yell it as loud as he could: “Firebush!” And this made me livid. And one time he yelled it as loud as he could in Social Studies class, and I said to myself Next time I’m gonna kill him. I’m gonna kill him. I’m gonna kill him.

So, as you’d have it, three weeks later, he screams it across the entire cafeteria, and something snapped. I said, Boy’s gonna die.

So, the next day, we’re at lacrosse practice, and every month or so our coach would give us a chance to set-

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WaShingTOn

phillyweekly.com | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | Philly Weekly | 13

FOOD & DRINK

Photo by Jen Bragan

Perfect meating spot Kensington Quarters’ new butcher demo-and-dinner series puts a tasty twist on farm-to-fork dining. By Brian Freedman @WineUpdate

A

t last year’s Cochon 555 festival, the annual pork-a-palooza that, unfortunately, didn’t come to Philly in 2015, there was a pig-butchering demonstration on the schedule. Before the knives ever came out, and that massive hog was carved up into its constituent cuts and pieces, it laid there on its slab like a patient in an ol’-timey medical surgery amphitheatre. I didn’t have time to stick around for the demo, but I have vivid memories of attendees taking photos of it beforehand, circling it, craning for a better view. It was like the piggy equivalent of spotting a reclusive celebrity on the street, and everyone wanted a selfie to prove that they were actually in its presence.

It’s a heck of a turnaround from years gone by, when most Americans—even the most sophisticated eaters—didn’t want to make the mental connection between the steak or chop on their plate and the animal it had once been. That’s a testament to the maturity and seriousness of Philadelphia eaters in particular and American ones in general.

Kensington Quarters, the standout meat emporium on Frankford Avenue, is now taking things even further. Executive chef Damon Menapace and head butcher Heather Thomason have just inaugurated what will be a quarterly butcherdemo and dinner series, offering guests the chance to not just indulge their inner carnivore, but to see firsthand where all of that glorious meat comes from.

At last week’s first installment, 16 guests enjoyed a five-course menu prepared by Menapace and had the opportunity to watch one of the region’s most masterful butchers at work on the forequarter of a cow. The symbolic importance of the turnout, and the positive response to the

14 | Philly Weekly | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | phillyweekly.com

evening, were not lost on Menapace.

“I feel like in the 10 years I’ve been cooking in Philly, there is this resurgence of people wanting to know [where their meat comes from],” Menapace told me.

“I’m sure 15, 20 years ago, people wanted the square cut tenderloins or whatever.

But I think now, there are people seeking it out, and I think we’re here at the right time to let people see the process all the way through.”

According to Menapace, this was a first for everyone in attendance last Tuesday.

However unfamiliar the process may have been to them, they were nonetheless rewarded with a menu that they experienced in a very different way than they likely had in the past. Plenty of meat lovers appreciate beef tartare, but how much more intimate must it be to tuck into it right after it was cut from the cow itself?

Few carnivores could argue with the allure of a perfectly grilled ribeye, but watching it get sliced out of the animal by an expert butcher not long before it hits the heat?

That’s the sort of experience Kensington Quarters is providing with these events.

(Dishes like braised brisket, that required longer cooking times and had to be started before guests arrived, were crafted from meat that had been butchered earlier. Still, Thomason cut a brisket from that night’s bovine star of the show in order for everyone to see from where it came.)

The plan is to hold these evenings once a quarter and to butcher a different animal each time. Menapace is planning on focusing on a pig next time, when he cooks up a meal with Chef Steve Eckerd, a veteran of Lacroix and the re-booted Le Bec-Fin. Keep an eye out for details at kensingtonquarters.com. If you’re a meat lover, it promises to be a seriously rewarding evening. n

MUSIC

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Gary Clark Jr.

Top 10 ShowS ARoUND phILLY ThIS wEEK

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Oct. 28 at Ardmore Music Hall.

Thought for sure this thing’d be sold out by now. The VIP ticket price includes a signed CD and a meetand-greet with the man himself. ardmoremusic.com

2

Big Freedia + Boyfriend + hibou Oct. 29 at Theatre of Living

Arts. The bounce music boss headlines a booty-bobbing extravaganza that features burlesque-flavored rapstress Boyfriend among its openers. tlaphilly.com

3 4

Carol Riddick Oct. 29 at SOUTH.

South Philly’s own shining star livens up Gerald Veasey’s new “Unscripted Jazz Series” with her dazzling vocal virtuosity. southrestaurant.net

The Chainsmokers + SNBRN + Speaker of the house + Yacht Club + Luca Lush +

Kylexi Oct. 30 at Electric Factory. The

gem-dropping DJ/production duo helm a sold-out six-band bonanza for their 32-date “Friendzone Tour,” which’ll feature various lineups along the way. electricfactory.info

5

David Ryan harris Oct. 30

at Tin Angel. John Mayer fans already know the deal; the rest of us have been sleeping far too long.

This guitarist-singer-songwriter’s so underrated, it hurts. tinangel.com

6

Sun Ra Arkestra Oct. 31 at John-

ny Brenda’s. Longtime Ra disciple Marshall Allen is 91 (!), and he’s still leading the Afro-futurist free jazz collective with heart and passion. Sold out. johnnybrendas.com

7

TJ Kong & the Atomic Bomb + pine Barons + Ali wadsworth + Mercury Radio Theatre + Satellite hearts + Red 40 & the Last Groovement Oct. 31 at Underground Arts. Kong’s sixth annual Halloween Murder Show promises to be tastier than anything stolen from your kid’s trick-or-treat bag. undergroundarts.org

8

Gary Clark Jr. Nov. 1 at The Fillmore. The blues darling’s already won raves for last month’s chart-topping The Story of Sonny Boy Slim album, and his roadshow’s sure to please, too. thefillmorephilly.com

9

The Skatalites Nov. 3 at World Cafe Live. Time sure flies when you’re rocking the world! It’s the Jamaican ska band’s 50th anniversary, and this outing’s a nonstop celebration. philly.worldcafelive.com

10

Grand Agent + name + C.R.A.V.E. Raw + Blizzy Trill + Ron Boom Cook Nov.

4 at The Fire. If this ridiculously fat hiphop bill is still too lean for you, The Wurx and Aul Purpis may also show up to bust a few rhymes. thefirephilly.com

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COMEDY | by Kevin Matuszak 2031 SANSOM STREET PHILADELPHIA PA

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@KevinMatuszak

Bill Burr’s new F-word The caustic comic talks sports, laughs and his new Netflix show.

GARY GULMAN “COMEDY CENTRAL PRESENTS...”

PRESENTS...

OCT 29-31

CRAIG SHOEMAKER “THE LOVEMASTER”

NOV 5-7

ARI SHAFFIR “THIS IS NOT HAPPENING HAPPENING”

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HOLIDAY PARTIES PL A N A S E A S O N A L C E L E B R AT I O N YO U’L L N E V E R F O R G E T

C O N TA C T R E MY B @H E L I U M C O M E DY.C O M

T

he date? Sept. 9, 2006. The place?

The once-named Tweeter Center at the Waterfront (rechristened the Susquehanna Bank Center two years later), located on the emerald streets of Camden, N.J. Dom Irrera had just been mercilessly heckled off the “Opie and Anthony’s Traveling Virus Tour” stage.

An obnoxious audience begins to boo and talk over the next comic to take the spotlight, longtime rage-roiler Bill Burr.

Frustrated at their antics, he pulls a move bested only by Bernie Mac’s legendary “I ain’t scared of you motherf—ers!” set before an unruly crowd on HBO’s Def Comedy Jam: He verbally beats the crap out of 10,000 people.

“Dude, that was from forever ago,” he laments after watching the Eagles’ messy victory over the N.Y. Giants in Monday Night Football. Burr’s focus is firmly fixed onto his next Philly show—Fri., Nov. 6 at Wells Fargo Center—not that infamous night across the river, one he declares “people make way too big a deal about.

No one cares about that anymore. When people from Philly email me, they ask when I’m coming to town next.” (Read our entire interview at PhillyWeekly.com.)

Do you like playing in bigger venues, compared to smaller, mainstream rooms?

I like playing all of them. I have the Madison Square Garden gig coming up, and I wanted to see what it’s like. This is the first time I’m doing a venue like this when it’s my show. And to be honest with you, dude, if it was my choice [where to perform in Philly], I would play the Spectrum. I grew up with that. I’m sentimental about those sports venues. If we could talk about the past—like how this interview started—I’d love to see the ‘83 Sixers against the ‘96 Bulls, and I’d put my money on the Sixers. People are brainwashed thinking the ‘96 Bulls is the best f—ing team of all time.

Like when people say the Miami Heat could beat the ‘96 Bulls when the Heat had LeBron, Bosh and Wade.

Yeah! And like how they say that Tom Brady is the best quarterback of all time.

Give me Joe Montana! Nothing pisses me off when people bring up sports history and don’t f—ing know anything about it.

That’s exactly why I’m not acting like I know what we’re talking about.

EAT | DRINK | BE ENTERTAINED

18 | Philly Weekly | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | phillyweekly.com

Another thing that pisses me off is when your team wins the championship, and the next year, they start off with three

losses, and the entire city wants everyone traded. I don’t know how it’s like in Philly, but in New York and Boston, they come at everyone’s throat.

What’s this new show you have coming out on Netflix?

It’s called F is for Family. It’s about the Murphy family, and it’s set in 1973. It came about [from me] telling my family stories on stage, to like, I know these stories are funny, but how can I get more of these out? So, I was walking my dog one day, thinking ‘Ah, what if I animate them?’—and it started with the idea of five-minute vignettes. Of course, I never did it until I took a meeting with Vince Vaughn’s company, Wild West. They asked me if I had any ideas, and I told them no. Then, as I was walking out the door, I told them, “I kinda got this idea for a cartoon.” They were like, “We kinda want to do a cartoon, so what’s the idea?”

Next thing I know, I’m in business with them and Mike Price from The Simpsons, and we have six episodes coming out in December. It took four years, but it’s coming out. It’s about the ‘70s and the way that I remember them. Our mission statement was “No lava lamps.” People had them, but not everyone had them.

Hollywood made you believe that. Same thing with the AMC Pacer in the ‘70s. My mother and I thought that it was the ugliest car we’d ever seen in our lives. Hollywood makes people believe otherwise when, in reality, everyone made fun of that car. It looked like a giant dinner roll with windows.

You’ve worked on some of the biggest shows around: Chappelle’s Show, Breaking Bad and my personal favorite, Kroll Show.

No one has ever made me laugh like Nick Kroll. I shot a scene with Kroll on New Girl, and we were waiting around to film our scene. It’s getting to 1am, and my brain is starting to shut down. Again, it’s 1am. We finally get to our takes, and we had two takes. Nick Kroll had me crying, laughing and blowing takes because I was laughing so hard. One of the funniest guys I’ve ever met. So much fun working with him.

I hope that I get to work with him again in the future. He’s devastatingly funny and doesn’t break character. If you ever get him to laugh, it’s a great feeling. n

Fri., Nov. 6, 7pm. $19-$69, Wells Fargo Center, 3601 S. Broad St. 215.336.3600. wellsfargocenterphilly.com

SCREEN

|

by Zaki haSaN @ZakisCorner

Steve Jobs: Perfectly imperfect

CATE BLANCHETT ROBERT REDFORD TOPHER GRACE ELISABETH MOSS AND DENNIS AQUAID

“A GRIPPING, BEAUTIFULLY EXECUTED JOURNALISTIC THRILLER. CATE BLANCHETT IN ONE OF HER GREATEST SCREEN PERFORMANCES.” -Stephen Holden, THE NEW YORK TIMES

The impossibly charismatic Michael Fassbender channels the Apple visionary in this best-of-the-year contender.

T

hat Steve Jobs’ unquestionable genius went hand-in-hand with his equally unquestionable selfpossession is hardly a revelation. Like all people of vision, the Apple co-founder was trapped in that fissure between the man he was and the man we saw. Long before his death in 2011, Jobs had taken on a larger-than-life mystique that grew exponentially with each new reality-warping product the company launched, and his passing has only cemented that mystique.

But again, none of that is news. What makes Steve Jobs, the new film directed by Danny Boyle from a script by Aaron Sorkin, such a bravura piece of cinema isn’t how it depicts Jobs, but rather the way—just like its subject—it breaks down our traditional expectations from the biopic genre and channels them into something entirely unique. Rather than attempting to show Jobs’ entire journey from birth to death, the movie—starring an impossibly charismatic Michael Fassbender in the title role—frames our relationship with the man through three key events.

We begin in 1984, in the aftermath of Apple’s famous Orwell-themed ad heralding the impending arrival of the Macintosh. Jobs, just shy of 30, is about to unveil the computer to the waiting public. For the second act, we land in 1989, as Jobs, having been fired from the company he founded, is primed to launch the doomed-to-fail NeXT computer. Finally, we end in 1998, as Jobs, now back at Apple, is set to reveal the iMac. All throughout, he deals with harried assistant Joanna (Kate Winslet) and has various encounters with erstwhile father figure John Sculley (Jeff Daniels), among others.

Fassbender doesn’t exactly resemble Jobs, but he becomes him all the same, and when you look at the movie’s structure, there’s something vaguely Dickensian about the arc Sorkin has sketched out for him. In essence, the three acts/ product reveals function as Christmases past, present and future for the Ebenezeresque Jobs as he undergoes his emotional transformation, embodied by his re-

lationship with his daughter at different stages of her life. Following that metaphor, I suppose the Bob Cratchit role in this parable falls to Seth Rogen as Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak.

While Fassbender is understandably getting the lion’s share of chatter, this really is an incredibly compelling performance from Rogen, who sublimates many of his more notable tics to portray Wozniak as an almost tragic figure in this particular narrative— a characterization of his life that the real Wozniak strenuously disagrees with, by the way. Per Boyle and Sorkin’s calculation, Woz is the unequal equal partner, the man who put in the time in the trenches, who did the work, but who’s been consigned by history to stand behind the guy who gets all the applause. At one point, the exasperated Wozniak questions Jobs about what he does that deserves so many accolades since so much of the actual work is done by others who are just as worthy of acknowledgement. “The musicians play the instruments,” responds Jobs. “I play the orchestra.” It’s a trademark zinger from Sorkin (whose dialogue I will never, ever get tired of hearing), and while it may never have actually been said by Jobs, it nonetheless exemplifies how the line between bravado and egotism is sometimes paper thin. To the credit of both Fassbender and Sorkin, however, we mostly remain on the right side of that divide.

The world after Apple computers is fundamentally different from the one that existed before it, and Jobs’ role in that transition will forever make him worthy of examination and, for all his personal failings, admiration. Like Sorkin’s work on The Social Network before it, Steve Jobs isn’t meant to serve as a historical document of a man, but rather a meditation on a movement. With Boyle directing, Sorkin on script and a roster of supremely talented performers going through their paces in front of the camera, Steve Jobs is a filmmaking achievement of the highest order and one of the best movies of the year. n

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phillyweekly.com | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | Philly Weekly | 19

StAge | by Jacqueline Rupp

@PhillyJackie

Exploring humanity BalletX’s fall series marks the company’s 10th anniversary.

B

alletX marks its 10th anniversary with their fall series at the Wilma, kicking off with a bang: the world premiere of Beasts, choreographed by Nicolo Fonte, whose mastery last dazzled BalletX audiences in 2013’s Beautiful Decay.

Exploring the age-old debate of nature vs. nurture, dancers take on both savage and noble human qualities, all in service to the company’s classic amalgam of athleticism and artistry. Philly Weekly caught up with the Brooklyn-born Fonte, who is currently the resident choreographer for the Salt Lake City-based Ballet West, to find out more about his latest production as rehearsals continue for the November debut.

Can you give us a glimpse into the preparation process for a production like Beasts?

As for any new work, one of the most important parts of preparing that work is the choosing of music.

But in this particular case, where I am creating a two-act ballet that is absolutely guided by its intellectual concept—a dramatization of the sociological debate of nature versus nurture— the choice of music is more challenging because the music has to absolutely serve the idea, as opposed to just hearing a piece of music, liking it and deciding I want to choreograph to it. I’ve already trashed certain pieces of music that I love because I felt they didn’t serve the larger purpose of the ballet. And in this particular case, I chose the “collage” route—choosing many different types of music and different composers—so there was a lot of changing up and listening to different track lists before arriving at a final version of the music that works for me. I’ve also done quite a bit of research on the subject matter, as well as some research on related areas, such as Darwinism and survival of the fittest.

What are the biggest challenges for you with this particular production?

Making sure that I don’t overreach! The subject matter is huge, and I have to narrow down and make choices as to what I will explore in the ballet. But I also am not interested in creating an overly intellectualized “thesis”-type work. I’m a choreographer, and I make dances—dances that sometimes provoke thought but they also entertain. Finding the right balance will be challenging, but that is a necessary part of any creative endeavor.

What made you want to work with BalletX again?

I love working with BalletX because they afford me the possibility to create works like Beasts. We have that mutual interest in creating full evening works that are not necessarily literal narrative-type works.

I also love the versatility and dynamism of the dancers and their professionalism.

They are a small organization with very big and far reaching ideas, on all levels.

That is really compelling to me!

How do you feel Philadelphia has received your work in the past? Are you anxious for them to see Beasts, especially since it’s a world premiere?

Honestly, I have had the best experiences with the Philadelphia audience. There have been overwhelmingly positive responses to my work performed here. However, I am always anxious about a world premiere— here in Philadelphia or anywhere. l Bil

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rt

be

He

Where do you feel you personally fall in the nature vs. nurture debate?

Have your ideas shifted or expanded through the process of choreographing Beasts? y ob ot

Ph

I guess I feel, as most scientists and sociologists today, that human development is a combination of the two. To what degree are we more biology or more learned is still an open ended question. But the really interesting thing for me in working with the BalletX dancers is a heightened awareness of their willingness, in a choreographic sense, to become blank slates or tabula rasa—which is the viewpoint of the nurture argument (that we are born blank slates and human traits are developed through environmental influences) and allow the choreographer to mold them.

But however “blank” they become, for me, we still experience basic human impulses and emotions very much in the same way, regardless of my impact on them.

What would you say to newcomers to BalletX? Sit back and enjoy the ride! Don’t overthink “understanding” it. There are many ports of entry to my work, and if the subject matter itself doesn’t grab you, the dancing most definitely will!

Nov. 18-22. $22-40. Wilma Theater, 265 S. Broad St. 215.546.7824. balletx.org phillyweekly.com | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | Philly Weekly | 15

TIMAREE’S BODY

by Timaree Schmit @timaree_leigh

Outward and inward I was challenged, I was scared—and I did it anyway.

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20 | Philly Weekly | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | phillyweekly.com

re you, like, insensitive to adrenaline or something? Is that why you’re so chill?” I ask the nice bearded man fixing the carabiner on my harness. We’re on top of One Logan Square, 31 stories away from the ground. “It’s my job to be on a roof,” he replied. “A lot of people think writing is really scary.” Not sure that’s comparably frightening, but whatever.

Right now, I’m trying to not freak out about the fact that while this skyscraper is filled with perfectly good elevators, I’m about to climb down a side of it. Here come two more nice people who are going to calmly talk me through combating every instinct in order to launch myself off the roof.

So far, everyone today—either from Over the Edge, a company that does rappellingbased fundraisers, or from the non-profit outdoor education program Outward Bound—has been incredibly friendly. We’re here for the latter’s annual Building Adventure fundraiser, something they’ve been doing since 2012. Outward Bound puts people in unfamiliar settings, often the wilderness, and helps them discover their own resourcefulness. These experiences translate into character development and confidence to take leadership roles in regular life. These adventures are used for everything from corporate team-building to empowering disadvantaged youth.

Katie Newsom Pastuszek, executive director of Philadelphia Outward Bound School, says there’s no limit to who can participate.

“We can work with anyone. Often, the most powerful experiences are for the teachers and parents who get to see their students lead and take responsibility in ways they never have before.” She tells me about a particular kid who was brought to Outward Bound by his teacher. “He was, in many ways, in the middle. His grades were just okay; he didn’t engage in class. But he was finally pushed, and it changed his life.” After that, the student sat in the front of class and actively participated. Alongside the meteoric ascent of his self-confidence, his grades rose too.

Building Adventure mirrors what participants face in the Outward Bound School: a fun challenge that leads to uncovering strength and potential. Ideally, every child could access this experience, but many schools don’t have the budgets for books, much less character development activities.

According to the organization’s literature, Outward Bound bridges this gap with scholarships for underserved schools, as well as for war veterans and “teens who have suffered a tragic loss.” Here’s where the Building Adventure fundraiser comes in: In order to take part in this 31-story rappel, participants must raise $2,000 for Outward Bound. $275,000 is this year’s goal.

Kate, the nice woman who’s mentally pre-

Photo by Valerie Panti

paring me to step off a building into abject nothingness, works for Outward Bound. She is really good at talking calmly and clearly, and she instructs me to stand on the ledge.

This is the moment where my brain goes from “excited but nervous!” to “What the actual hell, Timaree?!” I remind myself that not everyone gets to do this. Few get the ridiculous privilege of viewing the Cathedral Basilica from 400 feet off the ground or experiencing this kind of complete immersion in a physical and mental challenge—not to mention doing so in total safety. This, of course, is the literal purpose of this fundraiser: to let young people who could really benefit have a similar opportunity. Secure in the knowledge that, if I should plummet to my death, my last meal will have been mac and cheese, I comply with Kate’s instruction.

We do the final checks. Once I push away, the rest will be up to me: setting the pace and physically lowering myself, bit by bit.

Kate prepares me for the next step: “You’re going to sit down and put all your weight back, keeping your legs straight, so you’re shaped like an L. This is going to be the hardest part.”

Everything from that point is an amalgam of overwhelming sensations. My thoughts race from the cognitive task of running the gear to appreciating the majesty of my beautiful city, pondering the engineering of the apparati, and thinking about a friend who just died of cancer and how much he would have rocked this. At one point, I look down to the ground and see two of my friends, who happen to work in the area, cheering me on.

In that instant, I realized that I hadn’t just been set up and let loose to succeed or fail alone: This was a shared experience, a group effort. And it was my responsibility to take the incredible energy and encouragement I had just received and share it outwardly.

Here’s hoping you’d want to do the same. n

SAVAGE LOVE

by Dan Savage | Twitter: @FakeDanSavage

Bitter wife’s revenge plot?

I

am a straight, married, 38-year-old woman. My husband and I have two children. I have been with my husband for 12 years, married for six. Three years after we were married, we found out that he was HIV positive. We had both had multiple tests throughout our relationship because of physicals and the process we went through to get pregnant. Both of us were negative then, but only I am now. Needless to say, he was infected as a result of him cheating. We worked through that and remained married. Recently I saw a message from a woman saying, “Call me or I am calling your wife.” I identified myself, and she and I spoke briefly. I asked her how long they were having a relationship, and she told me since January. I did not mention his status. I confronted him, and he claims she is a crazy stalker. He says there was a brief flirtation but then she became clingy and “crazy,” and he did not know how to tell me without compromising our relationship.

He is undetectable, and we use condoms.

In the state where we live, a positive person who does not inform a person of their status before having sex faces up to five years in prison. He is sticking to his story that he did not have sex with her. I do not believe him. We met with a therapist last week, only for a placement consultation. We did not mention his status. This is my biggest issue: I don’t think we can work through our problems without honesty. I need him to come clean and admit to me—and our therapist— that he had sex with this woman. If he does, I believe the therapist will be legally obligated to report his behavior to the police. I am preparing myself for divorce, something he doesn’t know, and while I don’t want to have him arrested, I feel we need the therapy in order to respectfully co-parent—and lying to a therapist or omitting the full truth seems crazy. —Seeking Truth About This Unpleasant Situation “Where to start?” asks Peter Staley, the legendary AIDS activist, founding director of the Treatment Action Group, and longtime board member of the American Foundation for AIDS Research. “I’ll leave the relationship issues to you, Dan, but isn’t the level of distrust here the most toxic part of the story?”

The level of distrust does strike me as toxic—but seeing as your husband cheated, STATUS, and not for the first time, your distrust is understandable. What I don’t understand is your desire to see your husband sent to prison. You don’t want honesty (he doesn’t seem capable of that), you don’t want to “work through your problems” (your marriage is over), you just want your soon-to-be ex-husband to rot in jail.

But since you don’t want to call the police yourself—you don’t want your fingerprints on this—you want to con your husband (with my help!) into telling “the full truth” to a therapist who will have to call the police.

“STATUS really does appear to be plotting her revenge here,” says Staley.

“Divorce, checking her state’s HIV criminalization laws, drawing her husband into making a confession that could land him in prison.” And the instrument of your revenge—laws that require HIV-positive people to disclose to their sex partners— are unjust and unworkable.

“I stand with every public-health organization, including UNAIDS and the World Health Organization, in abhorring HIV criminalization laws like the one STATUS cites,” says Staley. “We already have laws on the books that can adequately deal with someone who knowingly and intentionally transmits HIV to someone else. Adding additional laws around HIV disclosure, especially when no transmission occurs, ends up causing more harm than good. Stigma rises. Fewer people disclose. Jilted partners use the laws to lash out.”

That’s exactly what you sound like, STATUS: a jilted partner who hopes to use an unjust law to lash out at her soon-to-be ex-husband. And while you have cause to be angry (serial adulterers suck), you don’t have grounds to destroy your husband’s life. And you can’t rationalize your plot based on the “danger” your husband presented to the other woman. Your husband is taking his meds and has an undetectable viral load. That means he’s effectively noninfectious. So even if he didn’t use condoms with this woman—and you don’t even know for sure if he was fucking her (and he’d be a fool to admit to you that he was)—he didn’t put her at risk of acquiring HIV. “There’s a great organization called SERO (seroproject.com) fighting these laws,” says Staley. “Their website is filled with frightening cases of people with HIV rotting in jail for supposed nondisclosure, even when no transmission occurred. There are no similar convictions for nondisclosure of hepatitis C, HPV, syphilis, herpes, etc., some of which can kill. People with HIV are being singled out by legislatures trying to ‘protect’ the public from ‘AIDS monsters’ created by local TV stations looking for ratings.” n

There’s more Savage Love!

Read more at ph.ly/savage Ask a question: mail@savagelove.net phillyweekly.com | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | Philly Weekly | 21

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12:30 to 2:00 308 LOMBARD ST SOCIETY HILL $845,000

12:30 to 2:30

200 LOMBARD ST #806 ABBOTTS SQ $385,000

1:30 to 2:30 1237 CHRISTIAN ST HAWTHORNE $629,000 310 GASKILL ST SOCIETY HILL $799,900 238 QUEEN ST 5 QUEEN VILLAGE $299,900 115 CATHARINE ST QUEEN VILLAGE $899,900 1520 E MOYAMENSING AVE PENNSPORT $479,900 745 S RANDOLPH ST (AKA 74648 E PASSYUNK AVE C) QUEEN VILLAGE $229,900 428 CATHARINE ST QUEEN VILLAGE $454,900 301 RACE ST #310 OLD CITY $259,000

OPEN HOUSES

204 S 3RD ST SOCIETY HILL $799,000

1:00 - 3:00 509 FOUNTAIN STREET ROXBOROUGH $279,900

phillyweekly.com/real-estate/open-house/ phillyweekly.com | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | Philly Weekly | 23

The Damon Michels Team “Specializing in MainLine & Center City” Damon Michels Damon@DamonMichels.com 180 Homes Sold in 2014 www.DamonMichels.com

610.668.3400

SHEFFIELD COURT

The William Penn House - Center City Living!

CENTER CITY PHILA.

Rittenhouse Square • Rooftop Pool • Fitness Center• Valet Parking • 24 Hr Security 24 Hr Maintenance

4 New construction Carriage homes starting at $599,000 4 beds/3.1 baths; 2 car garage; Open Floor plan with 3000 Sq ft MAIN LINE SUBURBS

605 New Gulph Road, Bryn Mawr 6Bed/4.1Bath; 4,416 sq ft Colonial $825,000 1089 West Avenue, Springfield 4 Bed/3 Bath; 2268 sq ft Colonial $365,000 1212 Weybridge Lane, Wayne 3 Bed/3.1 Bath; 3580 sq ft Colonial $649,000 102 Trotters Drive, Phoenixville 5 Bed/4.1 Bath; 5729 sq ft Colonial $675,000

Studios $130,000 to $160,000 1 Bedrooms $250,000 to $300,000 2 Bedrooms $300,000 to $450,000 3 Bedrooms $400,000 to $550,000 Includes real estate tax • No transfer tax 3604 Merrick Road, East Falls 3 Bed/1 Bath; 1116 sq ft Townhouse $188,000

710 Preston Avenue, Bryn Mawr 3 Bed/2.1 Bath; 1800 sq ft Twin $325,000 7000 Greenhill Road, Greenhill Farms 5 Bed/5.1 Bath; 4200 sq ft Colonial $499,000

20 W Turnbull Avenue, Havertown 4 Bed/2.1 Bath; 2564 sq ft rehabbed colonial $500,000 4 Greythorne Woods Circle, Wayne 3Bed/3.1Bath; 2,016 sq ft Townhouse $515,000 1212 Prospect Hill, Villanova 5 Bed/3 Bath; 3361 sq ft Cape $625,000

743 Humphreys Road, Ardmore 3 Bed/1.1 Bath; 1472 sq ft Twin $269,900

300 Farwood Road, Wynnewood 5 Bed/4.1 Bath; 4,910 sq ft Contemporary $479,000

504 Sagamore Road, Havertown 4 Bed/3.1 Bath; 3052 sq ft Colonial $525,000 1600 Hagys Ford Road 8G, Penn Valley 1 Bed/1 Bath; 766 sq ft Condo $125,000 11 W Amherst Road, Bala Cynwyd 4 Bed/2.1 Bath; 1956 sq ft Colonial $549,000 300 Lawrence Road, Broomall 3 Bed/3 Bath; 2,000 sq ft Ranch $375,000 517 Mercer Road, Merion Station 4 Bed/2.1 Bath; 2386 sq ft Colonial $649,000 415 Conshohocken State Road, Gladwyne 4 Bed/3.1 Bath; 2912 sq ft Contemporary $744,900 201 Delmont Avenue, Ardmore 5 Bed/2.1 Bath, 3-Story Colonial $519,000

Real Estate

Over 50 years in the real estate business

700 Polo Road, Bryn Mawr 4 Bed/3.1 Beth; 2394 sq ft Colonial $415,000 118 Penarth Road, Bala Cynwyd 5 Bed/3.1 Bath; 2963 sq ft Colonial $685,000 1416 Flat Rock Road, Penn Valley 5 Bed/3.1 Bath; 3635sq ft $715,000 Also for Rent $4,500/month 103 W Rock Hill Road, Bala Cynwyd 4 Bed/3.1 Bath; 2961 sq ft Split Level $599,900 941 Bryn Mawr Avenue, Penn Valley 6 Bed/5.1 Bath, 8231 sq ft Normandy $1,395,000 1489 Russell Road, Paoli 4 Bed/3.1 Bath; 4431 sqft Colonial $869,000 109 Cornell Road, Bala Cynwyd 3 Bed/2.1 Bath Ranch on .29 acres $365,000 6 E Dartmouth Road, Bala Cynwyd 3 Bed/2.1 Bath; 2236 sq ft Traditional $575,000

3112 Haverford Ave., Powelton Village 5Bed/2.1Bath; 1,998 sq ft Townhouse $395,000 3600 Conshohocken Ave #2101, River Park 2Bed/2 Bath; 1,251 sq ft Condo $99,900 3727 Baring Street, Powelton Village 10,168 sq ft Multi-Zoned Church $895,000 1919 Walnut Street, Rittenhouse Square 7,000 sq ft Commercial Space $2,750,000 Rental Options Available 303-5 S 11th Street, Washington Sq West Unit 2: 1 Bed/1 Bath; 772 sq ft Condo $239,000 Unit 10: 1 Bed/1 Bath; 868 sq ft Condo $215,000 1737-39 Chestnut Street #701, Rittenhouse Square 2 Bed/2 Bath; 1744 sq ft Condo $795,000 3338 Ainslie Street, East Falls 3 Bed/1 Bath; 960 sq ft Townhouse $170,000

LOCUST & 21st – Spacious 2 room studio, H/F, Lots of Light, Hi Ceilings, Laundry on Premises, Heat, hot water and gas cooking included, Avail NOW! $1,025 WALNUT & 22ND – Beautiful one bedroom, h/f, high ceilings, spacious & bright, laundry on premises, heat, hot water and gas cooking included, Avail November! $1,285

SOCIETY HILL WASHINGTON SQUARE WEST/ MIDTOWN VILLAGE

2301 Cherry Street 4Q, Logan Square 3 Bed/2.1 Bath; 1778 sq ft Condo $425,000 426 Seville Street. Manayunk

THE IMPERIAL – BROAD & SPRUCE - Studios in Hi-rise Elevator Building, Great Location, Hardwood Floors, A/C, Full Kitchens, Laundry on Premise, Avail. NOW! GAS INCLUDED! $795

4 Bed/1.1 Bath; 2016 sq ft Twin $239,000 530 Kingsley Court, Roxborough 3 Bed/2.1 Bath; New Construction Twin $404,900 303 Krams Avenue, Manayunk 3 Bed/1 Bath; 1579 sq ft Twin $199,000 716 S Marvine Street, Bella Vista 3 Bed/2 Full; 1652 sq ft Townhouse $600,000

THE CLAREMONT – CLINTON & 10th – Newly Renovated studios in mid-rise Elevator Building, Beautiful New Kitchens and Baths, H/W, Laundry on Premise, Avail. October!

ALL UTILITES INCLUDED! $815

305 GASKILL STREET 137 N. Croskey Street SOCIETY HILL

CLINTON PLACE – PINE & 11th – Bright & Cheery studio w/ view of Kahn Park, Separate eat-in kitchen, Elevator Building, H/W Floors, Laundry on Premise, Avail. Now! HEAT/HOT WATER INCLUDED $950

A Real Wow

The next level is the fabulous main suite – Incredible, bright and spacious with a full European bath (the best walk in shower) + a sitting and dressing area.

The lower level is a full basement waiting to become your favorite room. It has great space, mechanicals, laundry and lots of storage. Side alleyway for easy trash removal.

This great house is found in a terrific location, close to

everything,Custom Restaurants, Coffee Shops, Transportation, MODE 7 by Masada Builders

The Bell,-The Ritz + Live Your Dream in this Special Museums, EuropeanUniversities, InfluencedParks, 5500 SqLiberty Ft Home 2 Car much Parking, Elevator from Floor to Roof, 5 Bedrooms, 4 Full Spamore.

Baths, 2 Powder Rooms, Chef’s Dream Kitchen, Fireplace, 2nd Kitchen, 2 Decks & Garden & Tax Abatement.

Semi Private Quiet Cul De Sac Street between 22nd & 23rd & Race.

Reduced $564,900 www.conwayteam.com

Kathy Conway Patrick Conway 215-440-8190 215-266-1537 patrick@conwayteam.com kathy@conwayteam.com

Here Comes The Sun!

Finally a real recovery in the sluggish market.

Since June we have Sold over 35 homes and listed 33. Once again in The Prudential Real Estate Affiliates for 2009 our team has consistently Ranked in the top 3 for all four quarters out of 68,000 Agents.

Thank you sincerely for your Business.

September 2009

Kathy Office • 215.627.6005 • Please visit us online at www.conwayteam.com Society Hill

Patrick 215-440-8172

215-440-8190

90% of

our business comes from

friends telling

friends!

Listings

24 | Philly Weekly | October 28 - Have November 4, 2015 | phillyweekly.com you ever had a dream THE WONDEFUL ARTISAN DEVELOPMENTS about owning your own Deeded Queen Village Parking Space? WELL SOMETIMES DREAMS COME TRUE. We have 7 deeded

318 Fitzwater Street “The Dragon House”

4 + office/2.5 Garden & Garage.

246 Catharine St Beautiful Home. 3/2.5 2 Fp’s + lg garden $650,000

221 Carpenter St

3/2 & beautiful Garden $435.000

RITTENHOUSE SQUARE FITLER SQUARE

CHRISTIAN & 22nd – Spacious Four Bed Townhome, H/W Floors, Yard and Basement, W/D, Bright, Lots of closet space, Hi ceilings, Dog Friendly, Avail Now $2,550

2012 Spruce Street, Rittenhouse Square

Enter this unique home into a foyer to the terrific new cook’s kitchen with maple cabinets, Caesar Stone countertops and glass tile surrounds the entire area into the dining room. The flooring is handsome designer dark slate.

Step up to the terrific, dramatic, open two story living room with 18’ ceilings overlooking a wall of glass into the deep, peaceful Japanese garden. There is a custom designed extra wide spiral staircase to the 2nd floor which has the best open and spacious loft/den room again with a wall of glass overlooking the garden and beautiful neighboring greens + a full en-suite (bedroom and bath).

from 12:30-4:30pm Please call to arrange a viewing

RODMAN & 16th – Contemporary 2 bed Trinity Townhome, HW floors, w&D, C/A, Yard and Basement, Dog Friendly, AVAIL FOR IMMEDIATE OCCUPANCY! $1,485

4 Bed/5 Bath; 7155 sq ft Townhome $3,690,000

“Architectural Digest Candidate”. Super Contemporary – Open, Bright and Dramatic Design. Extra wide, 19 x 62 2000 sq. ft., 2 bdrms + huge den, 2 baths, hardwood floors throughout, newer kitchen and lovely garden found on a picturesque tree lined Society Hill Block.

SATURDAY APPOINTMENTS AVAILABLE

THE CHATHAM: WALNUT & 20TH - One bedrooms in High Rise Doorman bldg w/Magnificent Western & Southern exposure, View of Rittenhouse Square, HW Floors, Laundry on site, Professionally Managed.

AVAILABLE NOW! ALL UTILITIES INCLUDED! $1485

1827 Delancey Street, Rittenhouse Square 4 Bed/4.2; 5936 sq ft Townhome $3,350,000

JUST REDUCED

1230 Ridgewood Road, Bryn Mawr 5 Bed/4.2 Bath: 6755 sq ft French Estate $1,875,000 1001 Montgomery Avenue, Penn Valley 3 Bed/1.1 Bath; 1902 sq ft Colonial $475,000

ichael inger

1117 Spruce St

215-925-RENT michaelsingerrealestate.com

LOMBARD & 12th – Dynamic ,Two Story, Spacious Two Bedroom w/ Vaulted Ceilings, Great Layout, Lots of natural sunlight, Nice size Dining Room, Beautiful H/W, C/A, W/D, D/W, Private Balcony, Unique Catwalk, & Storage Unit Provided, Avail. NOW! FIRST MONTH FREE RENT $1,685 LOMBARD & 8th – Spacious Bi-level One Bedroom w/ Loft, Hardwood Floors, Decorative Red Brick Fireplace, Central Air, Laundry on Premise, Storage Unit Provided, Avail. Mid-Oct! $1,385

Looking to advertise real estate?

Contact jay@phillyweekly for more information.

For over 90 years the most respected name in Philadelphia Real Estate Center City’s Largest Independent Realtor

1901 DELANCEY PL RITTENHOUSE SQ NEW LISTING!

Pristine corner home with a museum feel, +/-8,806sf, 5br, 4.3b, media room, guest suites, elevator, 2 car parking, prime location!

$4,900,000 Call Bruce Benjamin

204 S 3RD ST SOCIETY HILL OPEN SUNDAY 11/1, 12:30-2:30 PM NEW LISTING!

Bright contemporary, 3br, 2b, w/b fireplace, 2 decks, garage parking

$799,000

& Associates, Inc. Realtors

113-121 BAINBRIDGE ST QUEEN VILLAGE

Grand spacious home on several parcels of land, beautiful detail throughout, gated garden with private terraces, 3-4 car garage.

Ideal for entertaining

$2,400,000 Call Izzy Sigman

1237 CHRISTIAN ST OPEN SUNDAY 11/1, 1:30-2:30 PM NEW LISTING!

Top quality new construction, +/-2532sf, 3br, 2.5b, h/w flrs, rear yard, roof top deck w/skyline view, finished basement, tax abatement

$629,000 Call Maryellen Cammisa

310 GASKILL ST SOCIETY HILL OPEN SUNDAY 11/1, 1:30-2:30 PM

739 BAINBRIDGE ST BELLA VISTA STRADA

Fabulous new construction, 4br, 4b, +/-3500sf, gourmet kitchen, Smart House Technology, patio, roof deck, Garage, tax abatement

Redesigned c1817 home with 3br, 3b, patio/garden, roof deck with skyline view, new price!

$1,349,900 Call Jody Volpe

$799,900 Call Karen Joslin

604-36 S WASHINGTON SQ #2603 HOPKINSON HOUSE OPEN SUNDAY 11/1, 12-1:30 PM

ABBOTTS SQ 200 LOMBARD ST #806 NEW LISTING! OPEN SUNDAY 11/1, 1-3 PM

The finishes, the views… stunning! Corner 2br, 1.5b, completely renovated, balcony, parking available, new price

2br, 2b bi-level condo, fireplace, roof deck, 24/7 front desk, parking available

$385,000 Call Viv Gilliam

$599,999 Call Michele Golembeski

Search all Center City Properties at: www.PlumerRE.com

226 South Street

215 922 4200

NEW LISTING FRANCISVILLE

PENNSPORT

NEW PRICE BELLA VISTA

BACK ON THE MARKET FITLER SQUARE

1 BEDROOM CONDO WITH OAK HARDWOOD FLOORS, EXPOSED BRICK WALL AND MAINTENANCE FREE COMPOSITE DECK $224,900

3 BEDROOM TOWNHOUSE WITH OPEN KITCHEN AND OUTDOOR SPACE $474,900

OPEN SUNDAY 1-3 509 FOUNTAIN STREET BEAUTIFULLY MAINTAINED 3 BEDROOM TWIN WITH HARDWOOD FLOORS, FIREPLACE AND BACKYARD $279,900

SPACIOUS 3 BEDROOM HOME WITH 10 FT. CEILINGS, HARDWOOD FLOORS AND BUILT-IN WINE FRIDGE $325,000

FABULOUS 2 BEDROOM PLUS DEN WITH 2 CAR GARAGE, LOFT CEILINGS, WOOD FIREPLACE AND ROOF DECK marissa@ewrhomes.com $649,000

NEW PRICE FRANCISVILLE

FABULOUS TRI-LEVEL CONDO WITH STAINED OAK FLOORS, BALCONY, PATIO AND 1 CAR GARAGE $369,000

phillyweekly.com | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | Philly Weekly | 25

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SOCIETY HILL

$750,000

Fantastic 3BR, 2-1/2 bath 3-story home with handsome facade historic plaque marble steps and window shutters in one of the finest locations in the city! Enter through vestibule into open living/dining space with hardwood flooring, gas fireplace, ornate wood mantle, crown molding, light fixture with ceiling medallion, and tiled powder room with pedestal sink and shelving. High end kitchen with a breakfast nook lead out to a delightful garden. Includes 1 year pre-paid parking! Truly a must see!

SOCIETY HILL

$395,000

Beautifully renovated one bedroom, one bath, north facing condo at Independence Place. This lovely unit features a living room and dining area with hardwood flooring and floor to ceiling window with door out to a private balcony.

The kitchen boasts wood cabinetry, stainless steel appliances and granite countertops. Enjoy the ultra-spacious master bedrooms and all it offers, with a walk-in closet, two additional closets, and more!

SOCIETY HILL

$2,100,000

Pristine and immaculate 6BD/5.5BA Society Hill masterpiece built in 1837 and designed by Thomas U. Walter, founding member of the American Institute of Architects, now completely restored from top to bottom in all its historic glory. Features range from beautiful wood floorings to a unique, custom wood and steel circular stairway, 6 zoned HVAC, tremendous light from all three exposures, an elevator and all-new kitchen, bathrooms and mechanicals.

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WASHINGTON SQ WEST

$325,000

Beautiful 2BD/1.5BA historic home on a low traffic block in the heart of Washington Square West with charming curb appeal. Wide open living room entrance with pine floors, two windows, coat closet, and a door out to the common courtyard garden with red brick planters and greenery! The third floor offers a master bedroom with cathedral ceiling, wall of closets, wood flooring and a roof terrace.

WASHINGTON SQ WEST

$1,050,000

This impeccably designed and decorated 2BD/2.5BA home in the center of Midtown Philadelphia offers the discerning urban resident everything imaginable. Featuring 2 full bedroom suites, inclusive of large walk in closets, and bright spacious tiled baths with double vanity drop in sinks with marble tops , separate glass enclosed shower, and soaking tub. This high floor condo in the Western Union building is a “Must See”.

Check out our video to get to know Mike & his team- you can find it at www.mccannteam.com!

26 | Philly Weekly | October 28 - November 4, 2015 | phillyweekly.com

QUEEN VILLAGE

$275,000

Very charming 1BD/1BA, first floor condo on the “Delancey Street” of Queen Village! This lovely unit begins with a wide open living and dining room featuring beautiful hardwood floors, fireplace and natural sunlight. The kitchen offers maple cabinetry, granite counters, stainless steel appliances, slate tile floor and pantry closet. Nice full tile bathroom with white vanity and spacious carpeted bedroom.

Office

215.627.6005 Direct

215.440.8345

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