Philadelphia Weekly 3-01-2017

PHILLYWEEKLY.COM

MUSIC

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MARCH 1 - MARCH 8, 2017

2017

GUIDE

ROCK FOR RIGHTS

Philly punk band raises cash for LGBTQ community.

Our no-frills guide to everything good in Philly this season

SEE PAGE 25

SEE PAGE 6

SPORTS

PHILLY NATIVE GOES GLOBETROTTIN’

Former Prep Charter star joins the Harlem Globetrotters.

SEE PAGE 17

CALENDAR PHOTO BY J. FUSCO FOR VISIT PHILADELPHIA®

GET OUTSIDE

Food, fashion and film all set to rock Philly this weekend.

SEE PAGE 21

DelawareValleyCars.com Where local car shoppers meet local car dealers!

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Connect with us: @PhillyWeekly EDITORIAL Kerith Gabriel, Editor kgabriel@philadelphiaweekly.com Max Marin, Staff Writer, mmarin@phillyweekly.com Don Russell, Editor-in-chief , Newspaper Media Group drussell@bsmphilly.com

state city

BUSINESS Perry Corsetti, COO, pcorsetti@bsmphilly.com Deidre Simms, Director of Major Accounts, deidre@phillyweekly.com PHILADELPHIA WEEKLY 2 Executive Campus, Cherry Hill, N.J. 08002 Phone: 215-563-7400 Classified: 215-354-3054

Vandalism beyond words

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ast weekend, heartless jerks paid a visit to Mount Carmel Jewish Cemetery (5701 Frankford Avenue) and knocked over at least 100 headstones. The act that put them in the running for the Most Pathetic Vandals along with last yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s jerks who threw a severed pigâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s head at a North Philadelphia mosque.

The Mizel Family Foundation, the Anti-Defamation League, and the Fraternal Order of Police Lodge 5 have offered a collective $13,000 reward for any information leading to the arrest of the offenders. Meanwhile, while the police work to ďŹ nd the culprit(s), ordinary citizens have been stepping into solidarity mode...

The Delaware T River is poppinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;

hose highly lucrative but annoying amphibious â&#x20AC;&#x153;Ride the Duckâ&#x20AC;? tour boats are long gone, but the loss hasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t hurt business on the Delaware River. Port authorities announced that freight imports reached a record-high in January, with cargo up 20 percent and certain container freight up 34 percent. There are a number of factors behind the boom â&#x20AC;&#x201D; from the Panama Canal expansion to new container business contracts, according to the Inquirer â&#x20AC;&#x201D; but at the end of the day, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s good news for Phillyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ports.

...When Democrats mess up so bad that a Republican candidate might win an 85 percent Democratic district by virtue being the only candidate on the ballot.

Last week, a Commonwealth Court judge bounced Freddie Ramirez, the lone Democratic nominee to replace convicted 6WDWH 5HS /HVOLH $FRVWD RĹŚ D March election ballot. Ramirez was removed for failure to meet residency requirements. With less than three weeks until the hastily organized special election, the Dems now have a tough time convincing the court to allow the nomination of another candidate who can prove full-time residence in the district.

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Thumbs up

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uslim-American organizations across the country condemned the heinous vandalism of the Jewish cemetery in Wissinoming. Not long after the attack on Sunday, a number of Muslims in Philadelphia joined others at the scene of the crime to offer a helping hand. Donations are also coming in to foot the cost of repair, estimated at $450 to $500 per gravestone.

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Lien on me?

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ariq El-Shabazzâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tax problems have been the defining feature of his nascent campaign for district attorney. The Democratic candidate has satisfied a $50,947 tax lien judgment from a 2001 case with the Common Pleas Court, according to the Inquirer. But his law firm, El-Shabazz & Harris LLC, still has nine other judgments that total $45,861 in unpaid fines and court fees.

All told, the IRS levied $137,187 in lien judgments against El-Shabazz between 2013 to 2016. Then thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a state income tax lien of $2,577 from last year. El-Shabazz, the former deputy to incumbent D.A. Seth Williams, said that the debt is â&#x20AC;&#x153;being handled,â&#x20AC;? and his campaign manager said more info is coming soon to explain the six-figure situation.

Fashion icon?

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tâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no secret to anyone who follows college basketball (or resides on the Main Line, for that matter) that Villanova menâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s basketball coach Jay Wright also has fantastic fashion sense. However, it still brought a chuckle to see the championship-winning coach talking style on ESPNâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s SportsCenter early Monday morning.

Wright was on with SC host Steve Levy to chat Oscars fashion and plug his new book â&#x20AC;&#x153;Attitude,â&#x20AC;? which also hit stores, Monday. Interestingly enough, Wright wore the same blue pinstripe suit on SportsCenter he wore the day the Wildcats won the national title telling Levy that he â&#x20AC;&#x153;would never sellâ&#x20AC;? despite numerous offers.

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$5.7 MILLION

On Sale 3/10 at 10 a.m. EST

Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s how much revenue the city collected in the ďŹ rst month of the controversial sugarsweetened beverage tax, according to a preliminary report from the Department of Revenue. The mayorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ofďŹ ce touted that this ďŹ gure more than doubled original predictions for January.

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OUTDOORS | SPRING GUIDE 2017

Concrete jungle no more

Play-a-Palooza Celebrate the opening of a new playground, stay for the various games, activities and fun for kids and adults alike. | March 25; $10 children (adults free); smithplayground.org

Penn Treaty Fishing Derby Sit on the banks of the Delaware and join other avid fishermen in Fishtownâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Penn Treaty Park for a day of fishing and fun. | March 25; 12-6 p.m.

Cherry Blossom Festival The 20th anniversary of this weeklong festival offers a chance for visitors to check out gorgeous cherry blossoms and more all over the Greater Philadelphia Region. From the opening of the Shofuso Japanese House and Gardens in West Fairmount Park (April 1) to the Cherry Blossom 10K and 5K (April 8). There will be activities for all ages to enjoy. | April 1-9; various locations; subarucherryblossom.org

Macyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Flower Show Plenty of springtime blossoms on display inside the Wanamaker Building, with flower show guides offering tours of flowers, plants and trees in bloom. Guests will also get a behind the scenes look at the Wanamaker organ. Best part? Tour the two-week event at your leisure completely free of charge. | March 20-April 3; social.macys.com/flowershow/

Wheel Fun Rentals

Get lost this spring in Philadelphiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sprawling park system

BY KERITH GABRIEL

T

ake a deep dive into Phillyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s parks system and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll likely never see the city as a concrete jungle again.

At well over 2,000 acres from east to west, Fairmount Park is incontestably the crown jewel of our urban outdoors. But itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s still just of fraction of the 10,200 acres of total community green spaces and cityowned parkland that spreads across the city.

With spring ofďŹ cially only a few weeks away â&#x20AC;&#x201C; recent temps have had many of us already in spring mode for weeks â&#x20AC;&#x201C; PW caught up with Moria Miller, who oversees strategy and communications for Philly Parks and Recreation. During the chat, Miller discussed seasonal preparations across all Phillyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s parks, new happenings, and a few things you may not know about the park system that would further debunk the concrete claim.

How do you guys gear up for spring?

One way we gear up for spring is through our annual LOVE your Park week. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a week of events where we spruce up our parks all over the city, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s also a celebration of parks where weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll host movie nights, dancing programs and 0$5&+ 0$5&+

other events. We also do something spectacular around Arbor Day and Earth Day; these are all the ways we get our stewards and [Friends of Philadelphia Parks] groups excited about the spring and summer.

So what are the top 3 canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t miss events Philly Parks and Rec plans to host this Spring?

[Our traveling beer garden caravan] Parks on Tap opens May 17. We are working on exact locations now, but we are bringing that back after a really successful year last season and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s another way of showcasing our parks throughout the city. In FDR Park, we also have second season of Wheel Fun Rentals, an amenity in South Philly where community members can rent bikes (cruisers, surreys, etc.) and boats (paddle boats, kayaks) to enjoy around FDR Park. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s open weekends and holidays beginning April 18 and we are really excited about that. For the third, our movie nights in the park generally start in late May or early June and that coincides with a lot that goes down within our neighborhood and community parks.

Why should I get off the couch and into a Philly park? Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the incentive?

Part of it is getting out and getting to know your neighbors as it pertains to us.

Because itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a city and we are so intertwined with our technology, I think there is a disconnect. In many cities, people arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t as fortunate to have these public gathering spaces, so we encourage everyone to get out and take advantage.

Tell us something unique that most Philadelphians probably donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know happens in city parks.

Within the conďŹ nes of the city itself we have active working farms. You can go to Fox Chase Farms, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Sheep Shearing Day. On May 13, we are hosting the inaugural wood duck and warbler festival at the Wissahickon Environmental Center... sometimes itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tough for us to communicate everything because there is so much going on. All the more reason we say to get outside. I think people that have lived here all their lives would be surprised at some of the events that are featured in many of our public parks.

TWITTER: @SPRTSWTR

The popular event fueled by a joint effort between Philly Parks and Rec and the Fairmount Park Conservancy offers a rental of a boat or bike on weekends and holidays to tour all that South Phillyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s FDR Park and the rest of Phillyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s vast park system has to offer. | Starting April 15; wheelfunrentals. com/locations/philadelphia-7

Blue Cross Broad Street Run Registration is full, but the best part is bringing a cooler and a bunch of friends to watch over 40,000 runners race down a 10-mile stretch of Broad Street. | May 7; broadstreetrun.com

Sheep Shearing Day A great learning experience for kids and adults alike.

Watch the shearing of city sheep and learn from farmers what is done next with the wool. Take a hayride and enjoy games, crafts and more.| April 29; 12-4 p.m.; Fox Chase Farm; $3 adults and children; foxchasefarm.org

Parks on Tap The mobile beer garden returns for the second consecutive year across Philadelphiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s park system. Enjoy craft beers on tap, wines and fresh eats. Kicking off around the same time as Philly Parkâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s LOVE your Park Week, Parks on Tap brings the comfortable chairs, hammocks and inviting outdoor experience. | Begins May 17; parksontap.com

Bird Philly Walks Enjoy a guided field trip with a bird expert and see that Philly is more than just pigeons. Courtesy of a partnership between Delaware Valley Ornithological Club and Fairmount Park Conservancy, these citywide trips are open to adults, children and even pets. | Season begins March 2; http:// birdphilly.org 3+,//<:((./< &20

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OUTDOORS | SPRING GUIDE 2017 Philly Farm and Food Fest Get inside tips on eating fresh and dining farm-to-table from award winning chefs from the likes of Zahav and Talulaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Garden. Get kitchen insight from a variety of experts and savor tastes from over 100 vendors â&#x20AC;&#x201D; all experts in the art of creating fresh delicious meals from scratch. | April 10; Pennsylvania Convention Center; http://phillyfarmfest. org

Manayunk StrEAT Food Festival Main Street Manayunk shuts down for a day of entertainment, phenomenal food vendors and boutiques hustling awesome wares. Enjoy live music and the special menu deals throughout the entire event. This day is always on point and expect this year to be much of the same. Especially if itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a nice day. | April 10; manayunk.com/newsand-events/events/fall-streat-food-festival.html

Manayunk Restaurant Week For two weeks immediately following the festival, Manayunkâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s restaurants come alive offering tasty prix fixed menu choices that wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t break your budgetâ&#x20AC;Ś or make you look silly on that Bumble date with the girl you forgot you swiped right on. | April 11-22; Admission free, menu range $15-35 per person.

The Penn Relays Watch the best runners from middle school through international teams run for two full days during this annual event. You can buy a ticket and kick it all weekend or go and watch five minutes every day. No literally, there is a race of some sort for every five minutes for over 33 hours. Also, this will be another year the race will be without its beloved Frank Bertucci, who passed after devoting decades of his life at the racetrack. | April 28-30; thepennrelays.com

Philly Tech Week Listen to scores of brilliant tech minds in Philadelphia school you on the latest in tech throughout all platforms of business, arts and culture. The event featured indooroutdoor exhibits from over 140 people citywide last year and yes, there will be cocktails. Technically Philly does it right with this event and if you like progressive motion, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll love this event. | April 28-May 7; admission varies; 2017.phillytechweek.com

Philadelphia Science Festival This is another interesting look into just how much science controls us on a day-to-day. Adults and children have something to check out at this event which will feature a massive street carnival full of games. Events are, for the large part, free of charge. | April 22-30; philasciencefestival.org

Spruce Street Harbor Park The avant-garde food containers, the hammocks over the Delaware, the stroll down Pennâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Landing, the pingpong. This pop-up beer garden is back on the banks of Phillyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Eastern shore this summer and will most likely continue to be one of Phillyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s choice destinations on a beautiful day. | Opens May 7; delawareriverwaterfront.com/ places/spruce-street-harbor-park

Dad Vail Regatta

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s like the Penn Relays of the river. Expect over 100 col0$5&+ 0$5&+

leges and universities from all over the country and Canada to descend upon the Schuylkill River for this annual rowing tradition. Kelly Drive will undoubtedly be a nightmare, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be worth it to check out and cheer on the local colleges that all have a chance to capture crowns. | May 13-14; Kelly Drive; Free; dadvail.org

Chestnut Hill Home and Garden Festival Call it the fresh air, call it the serene settings, but people flock to this event every single year. Check out the works of over 150 vendors and artists as Germantown Avenue becomes an outdoor marketplace on what many hope to be a beautiful Sunday in Chestnut Hill. | May 15; Red Ave. and Willow Grove Aves., Free; chestnuthillpa.com/events/ home-garden-festival-2

Italian Market Festival Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the smells that get you first. Expect another year of the open-air festival that brings much of South Philly to its knees. Bring an empty stomach to savor all the tastes that this age old tradition brings to 9th Street year-after-year.

Admission is free. | May 21-22; 9th Street; Free. | italianmarketfestival.com

Rittenhouse Row Spring Festival Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a day of great food, music and fun as Walnut St. in the heart of Center City shuts down for this annual daylong festival. Peruse shops featuring discounted items, check out unique gifts from local vendors and savor delicious treats alongside the hordes of people that flock to Rittenhouse Square. | May 21; Walnut St., Free; rittenhouserow.org

Kensington Kinetic Sculpture Derby and Arts Festival Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all about creativity with this one as the city comes alive to celebrate science and design. Vendors will be out selling crafts and various cuisines from the plethora of food trucks will be on-hand to complement a day of learning and fun. | May 20; 12-6 p.m., Trenton Ave. to Norris St.; kensingtonkineticarts.org

Devon Horse Show and Country Fair Two weeks of horses, equestrians and family fun descend upon the Main Line for this annual show and fair. A variety of events throughout the 10-day affair, which all lead up to the annual Grand Prix (May 28) event, always bring the crowds out. Come to see the horses, but stay for the various shops, concessions and carnival-like atmosphere. | May 26-June 5; Devon Horse Show Fairgrounds, 23 Dorset St., Devon; devonhorseshow.net

Blue Cross RiverRink Summerfest Right now itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ice skates and hot chocolate, but come spring, the RiverRink at Pennâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Landing transforms into roller rink with roller skate and blade rentals, the boathouse lodge and tons to eat, drink and do for all ages. Admission is free and the transformation is astonishing. | May 27; Blue Cross RiverRink 101 S. Columbus Blvd., Free., delawareriverwaterfront.com/places/blue-cross-riverrink-winterfest

â&#x20AC;&#x201C; KERITH GABRIEL | @SPRTSWTR

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THEATER | SPRING GUIDE 2017 Rodgers and Hammersteinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s: The King and I A Broadway classic comes to Philadelphia, all based on a true story. A love story with a twist, The King and I and its multiple Tony Awards is always a must see event. | March 22-April 7; Prices start at $67; Kimmel Center for the Performing Arts, 1420 Locust St., kimmelcenter.org

Cirque du Soleil: Toruk

Midsummer in Spring Arden Theater set to drop second production of Shakespeare comedy

BY MAX MARIN

INVITES YOU AND A GUEST TO

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TO ENTER TO WIN AN ADMIT-TWO PASS TO AN ADVANCE SCREENING, VISIT PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM/CONTESTS RATED PG-13 FOR INTENSE SEQUENCES OF SCI-FI VIOLENCE AND ACTION, AND FOR BRIEF STONG LANGUAGE. Please note: Passes are limited and will be distributed on a ďŹ rst come, ďŹ rst served basis while supplies last. No phone calls, please. Limit one pass per person. Each pass admits two. Seating is not guaranteed. Arrive early. Theater is not responsible for overbooking. This screening will be monitored for unauthorized recording. By attending, you agree not to bring any audio or video recording device into the theater (audio recording devices for credentialed press excepted) and consent to a physical search of your belongings and person. Any attempted use of recording devices will result in immediate removal from the theater, forfeiture, and may subject you to criminal and civil liability. Please allow additional time for heightened security. You can assist us by leaving all nonessential bags at home or in your vehicle.

IN THEATERS MARCH 10

SOUNDTRACK AVAILABLE NOW

KONGSKULLISLANDMOVIE.COM #KONGSKULLISLAND

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rden Theatre Company likes to mix things up.

The company has never produced two of the same Shakespeare plays twice since its curtains ďŹ rst opened in 1998, according artistic director Terrence J. Nolen.

So when Nolen announced plans Monday for Ardenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s second production of Shakespeareâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s A Midsummer Nightâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Dream, he emphasized that this isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t your everyday re-run.

In fact, Ardenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ďŹ rst incarnation of the beloved comedy was to open their F. Otto Haas Stage in 1998. So this carries some weight as the theater company steadfastly approaches its 30th anniversary. â&#x20AC;&#x153;This show holds a special place in our hearts,â&#x20AC;? Nolen said in a statement. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It is a play so full of youthful exuberance, as was our production, the cast and the Arden itself at that time.â&#x20AC;?

Arden put the production in the hands of Barrymore Awardwinning director Matt Pfeiffer, whose credentials range from stints with the Orlando Shakespeare Theatre to the Pennsylvania Shakespeare Festival.

"My approach to Shakespeare is to put the power of this play into the hands of the best creative talent in our theatre community,â&#x20AC;? Pfeiffer said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;This is a story of ďŹ rst loves. Shakespeareâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s language and humor are found in a story that we can all recognize. The characters ďŹ nd common ground through love and magic. In a time of great divisiveness, I think it's a kind of magic and celebration we need." Q

A Midsummer Nightâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Dream | March 2-April 9; Arden Theatre, 40 N. 2nd St.; Tickets $36-52. ardentheatre.org

The Cirque team comes to Philly showcasing their Avatar-inspired high flying act.

Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve performed the Oscar awarding winning James Cameron film all over the world â&#x20AC;&#x201D; most notably for a Today Show audience on Rockefeller Plaza. | March 8-12; Wells Fargo Center, 3601 S. Broad St., wellsfargocenterphilly.com

The Importance of Being Earnest Oscar Wilde. Slapstick comedy set in Victorian society. A true classic. | Prices vary; March 14-April 30; walnutstreettheatre.org

Cabaret Spend a night in the Kit Kat Club with Sally Bowles and get to experience the regency that was Berlin, Germany pre World War I. Set in the early 1930â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, writer Christopher Isherwoodâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s classic play still dazzles and explores sexuality in a unique and inviting way. | April 4-9; Kimmel Center for Performing Arts, 1420 Locust St.; kimmelcenter.org

Motown: The Musical This Broadway musical actually takes a trip into nostalgia, celebrating when music from the likes of Smokey Robinson, The Temptations and Diana Ross fought through the clutter and racial divide to rule the music scene. The four-time Tony nominee comes to Philly for only a two week showing, so take a moment to check this one out. | May 30-June 11; Prices vary; Kimmel Center for Performing Arts, 1420 Locust St.; kimmelcenter.org

Dirty Dancing The cult movie sensation starring Patrick Swayze is reimagined in this five night musical performance. Watch Baby and Johnny do their thing as great rock and roll collides with sensual dancing, lots of innuendos and memorable one-liners that all pay homage to one of the great movies of all-time. | May 16-21; Merriam Theater; $121; kimmelcenter.org

Adapt!

Follow the journey of Lenka, a young Czech bored with the state of her homeland in 1977. She meets an old woman and four men who take her on a tour that expands her horizons and entertains the notion of the world being much bigger than the con-

fines sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s become accustomed to. | March 22-April 22; Wilma Theatre, 265 S. Broad Street, Tickets start at $25; theatrephiladelphia.org/whats-on-stage/adapt

The Light Princess This production tells the story of a young teen who is devoid of feelings or the ability to touch the ground as she is immune to the likes of gravity. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a remake of an old Scottish legend told by George McDonald reimagined as a musical that is sure to keep you glued to your seat and the stage. | April 5-May 28; Tickets start at $20; Arden Theater Company, 40 N. 2nd St; theatrephiladelphia.org/ whats-on-stage/the-light-princess

Peter and the Starcatcher Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Peter Pan: for adults. This Tony awardwinning production will take you on a trip through Neverland with over 100 characters taking the stage all to complement Peter, the boy who never grew up. | May 12-June 11; Eagle Theatre, 208 Vine Street, Hammonton, N.J. Tickets start at $20; theatrephiladelphia.org/whats-on-stage/peter-and-thestarcatcher

Pennsylvania Ballet: Re/Action Experience a night of beautiful movement to the works of Matthew Neenan, the founder of BalletX, Christopher Wheeldon and George Balanchine that will feature dance working synonymously with classic ballet sounds to create beautiful on-stage art. | May 13-14; Academy of Music, 1420 Locust St; Tickets start at $188; kimmelcenter.org

Saturday Night Fever: The Musical Another remake on a classic movie, this show takes the audience on a trip back to when disco ruled and when butterfly collars and polyester ruled the night. Enjoy music from the Bee Gees while you follow the life of Tony Monero, whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s boring day job is a thing of the past once he steps on the dance floor at night. | May 16-July 16; Walnut Street Theatre, 825 Walnut St; Ticket prices vary; walnutstreettheatre.org

Opera Philadelphia: The Marriage of Figaro The suitor of Figaro, one of the operaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most recognized characters has to fight the advances on his beloved Susannah from his boss, the Count and do all of this while not trying to offend either side. But know thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s only one part to this spectacular that has more twists than a soft pretzel. | April 30; Academy of Music, 420 Locust St., $362; kimmelcenter.org â&#x20AC;&#x201C; KERITH GABRIEL | @SPRTSWTR

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MUSIC | SPRING GUIDE 2017 The Beach Boys

Fan of the Flames The Flaming Lips one part of a busy Philly music scene this spring

BY A.D. AMOROSI

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s far as whetting the publicâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s of 1999, an album he mentions appetite for ďŹ&#x201A;ashy big name several times during the interview. live rock, pop and hip-hop, â&#x20AC;&#x153;When we did â&#x20AC;&#x153;Soft Bulletinâ&#x20AC;? you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get wetter, ďŹ&#x201A;ashier and songs in the ďŹ rst place we thought livelier than The Flaming Lips. they were too heavy, and now it is Led by frontman Wayne Coyne, here, our ďŹ rst anthem, and we love the Lips head to Philly to play playing it for the crowd, these orthe Fillmore on March 4. Driven nate and melancholy melodies,â&#x20AC;? by psilocybin-laced song craft of Coyne said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;On [this] new album Coyne and multi-instrumentalist we were fumbling around with Steven Drozd, the Flaming Lips concepts and melodies until we have moved from absurdist Butt- came up with â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Castleâ&#x20AC;? where, hole Surfers noise-punk to charm- all-of-a-sudden, it was decided that ingly ďŹ&#x201A;uid, multi-layered psychede- weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re going to sing about a castle lia to weird ethereal pop. and rainbows.â&#x20AC;?

Enter the quintetâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s latest work: What is not mean-spirited is the the freakish fairy tales of 2017â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s extended family feel that Coyne â&#x20AC;&#x153;Oczy Mlody.â&#x20AC;? not only brings to â&#x20AC;&#x153;Oczy Mlodyâ&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;I think it is hard to stay naĂŻve and its Cyrus-ian ďŹ nale, but the forever, but thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s nothing wrong expanded Lips ensemble when it with maintaining wonder and cu- comes to teaming with the likes riosity,â&#x20AC;? Coyne told PW about Nick Cave and Erykah Badu. Not the artistry that brought the Flam- to mention the reinterpretations of ing Lips from its start to the pres- albums such as King Crimson's â&#x20AC;&#x153;In ent â&#x20AC;&#x201C; a present ďŹ lled with hip-hop the Court of the Crimson Kingâ&#x20AC;?, hookups with the likes of A$AP The Beatlesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; â&#x20AC;&#x153;Sgt. Pepperâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s LoneRocky, and compliments from Gu- ly Hearts Club Bandâ&#x20AC;? and Pink cci Mane (who said during an inter- Floydâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;Dark Side of the Moon.â&#x20AC;? view he wanted to be like the Lips â&#x20AC;&#x153;I come from a big Midwestern and Liberace). Add a long-standing family, just as Miley [Cyrus] did, friendship with disco-pop diva/wild and weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re just welcoming,â&#x20AC;? says child Miley Cyrus who appears Coyne. â&#x20AC;&#x153;If Steven [Drozd] and I on the Lips latest LP and this is a donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t do the things that we want to group that has no problem remain- do, we would be bored. We want ing relevant. to get lost and do what we really Coyne focuses on the wonder want to do. Expansion, being open, of optimism balanced against the extending ourselves is just one taint of disgust that the band has thing. Take the case of us opening held dear since its career-making- ourselves to Miley, sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just so baand-breaking â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Soft Bulletinâ&#x20AC;? dass who can do anythingâ&#x20AC;Śthen 0$5&+ 0$5&+

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the 50 year anniversary of their summer hit â&#x20AC;&#x153;Fun, Fun, Fun,â&#x20AC;? and the Beach Boys are making a stop in our region to celebrate. The group will also introduce Jeffrey Foskett, their singer/guitarist who has been with the group on some capacity since the early 1980s, but will head out on this spring tour with the Boys of Summer. | March 30; American Music Theatre, 2425 Lincoln Highway East, Lancaster, Pa., amtshows.com

Ariana Grande All grown up, Grande continues to shed her Nickelodeon skin with every performance.

The pop-princess will belt songs on her Dangerous Woman Tour from her album with the same name. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s one of the most popular albums of the year at one of the most highly anticipated shows of the year. | March 1; Wells Fargo Center, 3601 S. Broad St., Tickets start at $84; wellsfargocenterphilly.com

Regina Spektor The folk pop starlet heads to Philly ready to rock with some of her old classics, but will undoubtedly look to sing new tracks from her new album, Remember Us To Life, the seventh album in Spektorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s arsenal. | March 13; The Fillmore, 29 E. Allen St, Prices start at $66; thefillmorephilly.com

The Temptations and the Four Tops Before there was hip-hop, there was motown and this pair sat atop the mountain. This reunion tour will feature the multi-platinum duo rocking some of their greatest hits from the 1970s and 1980s. Both groups do contain new members, but the sound is classic, timeagain, everything we do with Mi- less and is coming to captivate the Greater Philadelphia Region | March 24; Keswick Theater, ley sounds more like Miley hang- 91 N. Keswick Ave., Glenside; Tickets start at $114; keswicktheatre.com ing with us making Flaming Lips music rather than anything else â&#x20AC;&#x201C; it Barenaked Ladies The 90s rockers head out for a nationwide tour this spring and pit stop at the Valley Forge just sounds like cool cosmic shit to Convention Center. Featuring a range from acoustic pop rock to a little ska and hip-hop, the sing.â&#x20AC;?

As for other big, â&#x20AC;&#x153;cosmic shitâ&#x20AC;? Barenaked Ladies will have fans out of their seats and jamming to the sounds of the 90s. headed to Philly this spring, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s | April 22; Valley Forge Convention Center, 1160 First Ave., King of Prussia; vfcasino.com/ grimy Philly punks Pissed Jeans at entertainment PhilaMOCA (March 11), blues Big Sean boss Wadada Leo Smith will showThis rap protege prepares to rock the Fillmore dropping hits from his fourth album on the case at the Institute of Contempo- I Decided Tour. From mixtapes to signature LPs, Big Sean brings a great sound on his latest, rary Art (March 18), and country complemented by cameos from Travis Scott, Chris Brown, Drake, DJ Khaled and a host of duo Garth Brooks and songstress other notables. | April 12; The Fillmore, 29 E. Allen St, Prices start at $81; thefillmorephilly. wife Trisha Yearwood for two com nights at the Wells Fargo Center John Mayer (March 25-27).

Mayer noted that he wanted this tour to be all about this music, so expect his Search for Want more? Okay, how about Everything tour to deliver just that. Mayer will sing some of his most memorable hits not the Latino punk-funk feel of Chijust solo but with the accompaniment of the John Mayer Trio in addition to a full live band. | cano Batman at the Foundry (April April 7; Wells Fargo Center, 3601 S. Broad St., Tickets start at $78; wellsfargocenterphilly.com 1); Former Dave Letterman band leader Paul Schafer at The Bor- Chris Brown gata (April 8). Teddy Riley, JagItâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s called the Party Tour and Brown is bringing all of his buddies along. In addition ged Edge, Ginuwine and Dru Hill to pumping out his R&B ballads, Brown will be joined by rappers 50 Cent and Fabolous. will headline the Liacouras Center Brown, the multi-platinum singer is looking to showcase tracks from his new album, Heart(April 15) followed by hip-hop sen- break on a Full Moon, when he pit stops on this nationwide tour. | April 22; Wells Fargo sation Gucci Mane on April 25.

Center; Tickets start at $50; wellsfargocenterphilly.com The Revolution plays Theatre Mike Posner of Living Arts on April 29; so does Posnerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sound has graced tracks the likes of Snoop Dogg, Avicii, Pharrell Williams and Britainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ďŹ rst punks, The Damned more but heads to the TLA producing his unique sound made known by his debut album, on it what is its 40th anniversary 31 Minutes to Takeoff, in 2010, but made widely popular following his hit singleâ&#x20AC;&#x153;I Took a Pill tour May 7; crooning neo-soul in Ibizaâ&#x20AC;?in 2015. | April 25, 8 p.m.; Theatre of Living Arts, 334 South St; venue.tlaphilly.com man The Weeknd will highlight Atlantic Cityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Boardwalk Hall on Metallica The heavy metal legends prepare for their latest tour. This will be just the second stop May 19. Squeeze in a June 5 nightcap with Nick Cave & The Bad on a nationwide jaunt. It also will mark the first time the group has ventured to Philly since Seeds at Electric Factory and soon 2009. Opening will be fellow scream acts Avenged Sevenfold and Volbeat. Like a Phillies home run or an Eagles touchdown on Monday night, this one is sure to wake the neighbors weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be talking about summer. Q in South Philly. | May 12; 6 p.m. Lincoln Financial Field, lincolnfinancialfield.com/calendar/ TWITTER: @ADAMOROSI

â&#x20AC;&#x201C; KERITH GABRIEL | @SPRTSWTR

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BOOKS | SPRING GUIDE 2017

Think globally, read locally Five Philly-area authors on their latest books, reviews from the dead, and schooling the president

BY MAX MARIN

T

he get-outside-with-a-good-book weather came early this year, so PW chatted with Philly-area authors whose latest works offer something for all

types.

Fiction? The Young Widowerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Handbook by Tom McAllister is for you. Into memoir and essay? Check out Hilary Plumâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s WatchďŹ res. For non-ďŹ ction readers, Andrew Ervin offers us Bit by Bit: How Video Games Transformed Our World.

And of course, it wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be Philly without poetry.

Check out Gina Myersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; perfectly titled chapbook, Philadelphia, and Nicole Steinbergâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s latest collection of work, Glass Actress.

Without summarizing its contents, describe your new book in terms of the reader youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re hoping to reach.

McAllister: I want The Young Widowerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Handbook to ďŹ nd readers who have experienced loss and grief but are frustrated by the banal ways we talk about grief. I want it to ďŹ nd readers who ďŹ nd themselves laughing at all the parts of the movie that are supposed to be sad, and feeling a little sad about the parts that are supposed to be uplifting.

Plum: The reader I was trying to reach was myself, but I hope WatchďŹ res might reach anyone who has felt that the ways we have of thinking about violence, war, and disease are failing us and failing others.

Myers: The worker, the artist, the every person. The person at the bar ďŹ&#x201A;ipping through this paper. You. Ervin: I would be grateful if Bit by Bit found an audience of literary-minded people who, like me, donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t necessarily consider themselves gamers but are curious to know how video games became such a vital artistic medium. I came to see that we can better understand ourselves and each other by playing some of the truly extraordinary video games. Although being represented by an avatar on a screen has become so mundane that we take it for granted, the experience still speaks to a quiet and on-going re-ordering of what it means to be human.

Steinberg: Wise-ass women. Fed-up femmes. Murderous matriarchs.

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Put aside the reviews of today and tomorrow. Name one dead author who you pray would have admired your writing, and one dead author who you think would have covered it in red ink.

The President of the United States often boasts that he does not read books but that he has â&#x20AC;&#x153;a very good brain.â&#x20AC;?

Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s one thing he could learn from reading your latest work?

McAllister: Kurt Vonnegut was the ďŹ rst author I truly loved, and even though I didn't follow his footsteps into the sci-ďŹ type of writing he did so well, it would be a career highlight if my book just made him laugh. I imagine Joseph Conrad would hate my book because it doesn't include any boats, or miserable men talking endlessly about boats.

McAllister: Just one thing? He could learn what it means to care about someone outside yourself, to even care MORE about that other person than you care about yourself. He could learn a little about how exposing your weaknesses to someone you love could actually make you stronger.

Plum: A dangerous question! But letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s say I could have hidden this book somewhere on the shelves of Edward Saidâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;I hope he might have felt a bit interested to discover it. And Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d like to read a negative, or at least provoked, review that David Foster Wallace might have written.

Myers: I would love if Ted Berrigan admired my writing because he's a poetry hero of mine. And I think it would be fun to read Dorothy Parker ripping my writing to pieces.

Ervin: Not a week goes by when I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t think about the late, great American novelist Robert Stone. The music of his prose is part of my indelible, inner soundtrack. He passed away shortly after he wrote a generous blurb for my previous book and Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m bummed that I didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get the chance to send him a copy of this one. Of course, I wonder if he would have wondered why I supposedly wasted my time writing about mere video games? Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a fair question, I guess, one that I hope Bit by Bit answers. Far from wasting my time, I was surprised to learn that some video games can be enriching in many of the same ways that literature can.

Steinberg: I like to think Muriel Rukeyser would have liked my work. Frank O'Hara probably would have told me to loosen up, maybe suggest I spend more time in museumsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;which would be good advice.

Plum: Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s safe to say this president doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t â&#x20AC;&#x153;learn.â&#x20AC;? I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know how heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d read a book that so intensely challenges the us vs. them ways of thinking. This book tries to intervene meaningfully into our recent narratives about the â&#x20AC;&#x153;war on terror,â&#x20AC;? and to locate new sites for compassion within our private and public lives. I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t think the president can comprehend that sentence.

Myers: I would hope he could learn empathy and gain compassion for people who are struggling under the oppressive state of late capitalism.

Ervin: Video games trace their roots to the military industrial complex, speciďŹ cally to the ďŹ rst nuclear tests at Los Alamos. Today many popular games still champion extreme gun violence and blind, unquestioned patriotism.

And yet more and more new video games prove that artâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and our culture at largeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;will always move toward being more democratic and egalitarian and feminist and introspective. He might learn that no one, not even an American president, can turn back the tide of history.

Steinberg: That Queens, N.Y. is better off without him.

(We're fellow natives.) It's a place that's much too fascinating and wonderful for someone as incurious about the world as he is. Q An expanded version of this interview can be read at phillyweekly.com.

TWITTER: @MAXMMARIN

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Shadi Hamid: How the Struggle Over Islam Is Reshaping the World Preoccupied by President Trumpâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s immigration policies with regards to the Islamic world? World Affairs Council of Philadelphia will be hosting Brookings Institution scholar Shadi Hamid to discuss his book Islamic Exceptionalism, which â&#x20AC;&#x153;argues for a new understanding of how Islam and Islamism shape politics by examining different models of reckoning with the problem of religion and state.â&#x20AC;? | March 8, 11:30 a.m. Tickets $15. World Affairs Council of Philadelphia, One South Broad Street, Suite 2M, wacphila.org

Susan Perabo: The Fall of Lisa Bellow The widely anthologized author of two short story collections, Pennsylvania-based writer Peraboâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s debut novel has been hailed by Publisherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Weekly as â&#x20AC;&#x153;a daring narrative strategy.â&#x20AC;? Perabo, who teaches at Dickinson College in Carlisle, Pa., will be reading in downtown Philly at the end of the month. | March 23, 7:00 p.m. Free. Barnes & Noble, Rittenhouse Square, 1805 Walnut Street. barnesandnoble. com/event

Roxane Gay: Difficult Women Hailed by Harperâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bazaar as â&#x20AC;&#x153;a mesmerizingly unusualâ&#x20AC;? collection of stories, Gayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s latest book examines a crosssection of polar opposites: the rich and the poor, the loved and the lost, privileged and impoverished, the included and excluded. Tickets for the main auditorium are currently sold out, but in-house simulcast seats are still available. | March 24; 7:30 p.m. Tickets $15, students $7. Central Library, 1901 Vine St, freelibrary.org

John Oates: Changes of Season: A Memoir Pennsylvania-born, Philly-fortified musician John Oates (the Oates of famed rock group Hall & Oates) will be releasing his musical memoir at the end of the month, and naturally, heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s kicking things off in the city where he got his start. | March 30; 7 p.m. Free. Barnes & Noble, Rittenhouse Square, 1805 Walnut Street. barnesandnoble.com/event

Alec Baldwin: Nevertheless: A Memoir Sadly, this celebrity reading is already sold out. But weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re giving you a headâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s up in case you want to scour for a ticket.

The winner of two Emmys, three Golden Globes, and seven Screen Actors Guild Awards, Baldwin is also one of the most watched actors in America right now for his SNL parody of Trump. The bar is high for his upcoming memoir. | April 7; 7 p.m. Tickets $37 (includes book). Penn Museum of Archaeology and Anthropology, 3260 South St. freelibrary.org

Anthony Doerr: All the Light We Cannot See Yes, Pulitzer Prize-winner Doerrâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bedazzling novel came out almost two years ago. But like any book that spends over 100 weeks on the New York Times bestseller list, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s still much to be discussed. Doerrâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s intricately woven tale of a blind French girl and a German boy whose lives intersect in war-torn Europe should not be missed. | April 11; 12 p.m.

Tickets $25 (includes book). Central Library, 1901 Vine St. freelibrary.org

Joe Beddia: Pizza Camp: Recipes from Pizzeria Beddia Joe Beddia, acclaimed owner and chef of Phillyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pizzeria Beddia, has been looking for the perfect pie for over 3+,//<:((./< &20

a decade. To some, heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s found it. Bon Appetit awarded his high-end Fishtown haunt with the best pizza in America, and now, in Pizza Camp, Beddia spills all his secrets along with 50 recipes. Does this mean we donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to wait in line anymore at the no-preorder pie shop? | April 24; 7:30 p.m., Free (pizza not included), Central Library, 1901 Vine St. freelibrary.org

Caitlyn Jenner: The Secrets of My Life Jenner will be in conversation with Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist and author Buzz Bissinger. For those who donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know, Jenner, an Olympic gold medal-winning decathleteturned-reality television icon, became one of the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most famous transgender people in 2015. Her new memoir tells the whole story from early days to present. | April 28; 7:30 p.m. Tickets $37 (includes book). Central Library, 1901 Vine St. freelibrary.org

Rakesh Satyal: No One Can Pronounce My Name Satyalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s second novel examines an enclave of Indian Americans outside of Cleveland. It paints a portrait of America as a place of mispronounced names and yoga class references. Through the story of a mid-40s man named Harit, Satyal brings both familiar and unfamiliar readers into the tender and often humorous realities of an immigrant family. | May 4; 7 p.m. Free admission. Barnes & Noble, Rittenhouse Square, 1805 Walnut Street. barnesandnoble.com/event

Dennis Lehane: Since We Fell The author of textbook thrillers like Mystic River and Shutter Island is on tour to promote his latest teeth-grinding novel about a former TV journalist who dives into a headpounding conspiracy theory. Like all of Lehaneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s novels, you should read it first before it ends up on the big screen, which is inevitably will. | May 18; 7:30 p.m. Free admission. Central Library, 1901 Vine St, freelibrary.org â&#x20AC;&#x201D; MAX MARIN | TWITTER: @MAXMMARIN

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South Philly Swish

Former Prep Charter girls star returns home as member of Harlem Globetrotters

BY BILL GELMAN

W

hen Swish, aka Bria Young, takes the court at the Wells Fargo Center on Saturday, March 4, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going to be much more than another stop on the Harlem Globetrotters tour through the United States and Canada.

This is her hometown.

She played her high school ball in South Philly and went on to achieve collegiate success at nearby Philadelphia University. This time, the stage is much bigger â&#x20AC;&#x201C;now a crowd of thousands â&#x20AC;&#x201C; cheering her on as she attempts a fourpoint shot or the dribble slide.

Yes, the ticket requests have been made â&#x20AC;&#x201C; we are talking about 200 of them.

Luckily, her Globetrotters are playing three games at the Wells Fargo Center, so she doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to worry about saying â&#x20AC;&#x153;sorryâ&#x20AC;? to her family members and friends. This stop, includes one game on Saturday (noon) and a pair on Sunday (noon and 5pm). Unlike the previous stops on the current tour, Young knows this one is going to be one she remembers for years to come. â&#x20AC;&#x153;As much as I am trying not to have a different mindset, I think I will and I hope to make everyone proud, make a couple of [four-point shots] and have fun,â&#x20AC;?

Young said, who arrived in town early to handle a few public appearances. But itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s only my third day back [in Philly] and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s great.â&#x20AC;?

Being a member about the Harlem Globetrotters isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just about all basketball, all of the time. Players also need to be role models to young children and give back to the community. For Young, originally a West Philly native, this includes visiting elementary schools to talk with students.

Of course, Mondayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s appearance at the Blair Christian Academy in West Philly had an extra special meaning as was returning to her old elementary school not as Bria Young, but as Swish 3+,//<:((./< &20

â&#x20AC;&#x201C; just the 14th female in the history of the Globetrotters. Besides chatting it up about growing up in Philly and defying the odds, she was there to spread an important message about the ABCâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s of Bullying Prevention in which she explained how to use Action, Bravery and Compassion to combat bullying. â&#x20AC;&#x153;At ďŹ rst I was a little nervous,â&#x20AC;? she said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Once I walked into the auditorium with all of the children there, my nerves kind of went away.â&#x20AC;?

Youngâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s story is an inspirational one, as the road to becoming Swish â&#x20AC;&#x201C; a nickname she acquired after joining the Globetrotters thanks to a jump shot that consistently goes swish â&#x20AC;&#x201C; was far from an easy one. Her high school career at Prepa-

ratory Charter High School (1928 Point Breeze Ave), did not go exactly as planned as a result of a serious knee injury that she suffered as a teenager, forcing her to miss signiďŹ cant playing time.

Many athletes wouldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve given up hope of professional hoop dreams becoming a reality, but Young was not one of them â&#x20AC;&#x201C; even after going through two ACL reconstruction surgeries within a span of six months. â&#x20AC;&#x153;At ďŹ rst I thought it was all over, but a little voice within told me not to give up, so I didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t and I worked harder than ever before to rehab my knee,â&#x20AC;? is how Swish tells her story within her online bio.

Things would turn around. Young would return to the court her senior

Former Prep Charter hoop star Bria Young (center) returns to Philly as a Globetrotter.

year at Prep Charter, and helped Prep Charter defeat Central High School for the girlsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; basketball Public League championship - the ďŹ rst in program history. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It was huge for us, not just me, but our program,â&#x20AC;? the 5-foot-6 guard recalled.

For Young, those career dreams were getting back on track as she accepted a Division I scholarship to play basketball at St, Francis University, but thanks to what she referred to as homesickness, her stay ended up being a short one.

What came next, however, opened the door for Young to put her game on full display. She transferred to Division II Philadelphia University, which she described as â&#x20AC;&#x153;the best decision for me.â&#x20AC;?

Young, who majored in psychology, enjoyed a stellar four-year career with the Rams that included tallying 1,067 career points and being named the Central Atlantic Collegiate Conference Player of the Year and helped her team win a league championship her senior year.

But she was far from ďŹ nished.

South Philadelphia natives Mike and Joe Richmond helped with lining up the Globetrotters tryout, and as they say, the rest is history. Swish is one of four current female players currently on the team, with the others being TNT, who played college basketball at Temple University, Ace, who hails from Harrisburg, and Hoops.

In todayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s professional basketball world, other opportunities could arise via the WNBA or overseas, but Swish is quite content calling herself a member of the Harlem Globetrotters. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I think the Globetrotters is the job for me. I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t see myself going anywhere,â&#x20AC;? she said.

The Harlem Globetrotters | Sat. March 4; 12 p.m.; Sunday, March 5, 12 p.m. and 5 p.m., Wells Fargo Center, 3601 S. Broad St. $21-$165 wellsfargocenterphilly.com Q 0$5&+ 0$5&+

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Y

ou know those urinal troughs on the ďŹ&#x201A;oor at the base of bars in oldtime taprooms?

Well, zip it up guys. Despite the common myth, the fact is those troughs are not, were not and never were intended to be used as urinals. In fact, the troughs are spittoons, a handy place to puh-tooey a wad of slobbery tobacco juice.

Common sense alone should tell you they werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t designed for barstool urination. Never mind the whole socially unacceptable aspect of whipping out oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s wand in a public place. Consider that thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no backsplash, and the gutters typically measure only about eight inches in width. As anyone whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ever had to scrub a toilet will tell you, men â&#x20AC;&#x201C; especially after a few belts â&#x20AC;&#x201C; are hardly expert marksmen.

Nonetheless, the myth persists.

At Kelliannâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bar & Grill, 16th and Spring Garden streets, the manager told me the trough was â&#x20AC;&#x153;for urinating, so you didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t lose your seat at the bar when you had to go.â&#x20AC;?

The 25-foot-long trough running along the bar at the 112-year-old Cherry Street Tavern (129 N. 22nd St) is cited by both Wikipedia and the cityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tourism agency as a urinal. Even Philadelphia Weekly repeated the ďŹ ction, reporting a decade ago that, â&#x20AC;&#x153;In the good old days men drank, ate and whizzed at the same time.â&#x20AC;?

Seriously?

I ran the myth past Lou Capozzoli, the owner of Rayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Happy Birthday Bar in South Philadelphia, where a tiled trough runs along the base of an oak bar. He

scoffed when I asked if it was used as a urinal: â&#x20AC;&#x153;I never seen anyone pee in it. My father had the trough installed after buying the place in 1938. If anybody had peed in there, my father would have killed â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;em.â&#x20AC;?

Capozzoli continued: â&#x20AC;&#x153;You have to realize that bars were a lot different back then. They were dirty.

Men would toss their stogies on the ďŹ&#x201A;oor, people would spit tobacco. My father installed the trough with running water - it still works, by the way - and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d sweep everything into it, then wash it out three, four times a day.â&#x20AC;?

The historical record conďŹ rms Capozzoliâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s memory.

The drawing in an 1897 patent for a barroom trough looks identical to the type still found around town, and its description indicates it was intended as a spittoon.

Earlier, open sawdust boxes and widemouth earthenware jugs were used for barroom slobber.

Early 20th-century saloons werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t particularly sanitary. A hygiene manual published by Harvard University in 1911 noted, â&#x20AC;&#x153;When a man steps up to a bar in a public saloon, he is apt to rub elbows with the scum of the earth,â&#x20AC;? where the patrons are infested with cankers and â&#x20AC;&#x153;a large percentage of bartenders are syphilitic.â&#x20AC;?

But when they had to relieve themselves, men didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just casually let loose a stream. They took it to the outhouse or water closet. The trough on the ďŹ&#x201A;oor, the manual said, was â&#x20AC;&#x153;for use as a cuspidor and a receptacle for the froth that some

men insist upon blowing off their mug of beerâ&#x20AC;Śâ&#x20AC;?

Now, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll concede there mightâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been occasions when a barroom patron used one to take an ill-considered leak. This is Philadelphia, after all â&#x20AC;&#x201C; a town where Eagles fans once commonly peed in the bathroom sinks of old Veterans Stadium.

But letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s put this myth to rest. Those are spittoons, not urinals.

TWITTER: @BEER_RADAR

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Find more events at PhillyWeekly.com Tell us about your upcoming events!

Send press releases and information to events@phillyweekly.com upload: phillyweekly.com/calendar

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 1 AUTHOR

Judy Collins: Cravings Singer/songwriter Judy Collins, or â&#x20AC;&#x153;Judy Blue Eyes,â&#x20AC;? is a four-time Grammy nominee and Academy Award-nominated documentary ďŹ lmmaker. In â&#x20AC;&#x153;Cravings,â&#x20AC;? Collins tells the story the countless diets and weight-loss gurus she encountered over the years. | 7:30pm. $7-$15. Central Library, 1901 Vine St. freelibrary.org

THURSDAY, MARCH 2 STAGE

the scene What to do in & around the city

SCREEN

Found Footage Festival

I

f you think youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve seen the weirdest, funniest and down-right-creepiest clips the internet has to offer, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re in for a surprise. For 20 years, Joe Pickett (The Onion) and Nick Prueher (Late Night With David Letterman) have been scouring thrift stores and dumpsters across the country to bring you some of the most bizarre and inadvertently hilarious footage in existence. The touring showcase features obscureâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and very realâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;VHS ďŹ nds that hail from all corners of the earth; from the curiously-produced industrial training video to the forgotten home movie donated to Goodwill.

This yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s selections include satanic panic videos from the â&#x20AC;&#x2122;80s, outtakes and on-air bloopers from 10 years of North Dakota local news, a little-seen â&#x20AC;&#x153;Welcome Home Desert Stormâ&#x20AC;? parade featuring Roseanne Barr and Gerardo, and never-before-seen morning news pranks pulled by Pickett and Prueher.

The duo began collecting found videotapes in 1991 after stumbling across a training video titled â&#x20AC;&#x153;Inside and Outside Custodial Dutiesâ&#x20AC;? at a McDonaldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in their home state of Wisconsin. Since then, they have compiled a huge collection of strange and stupid videos for your delight. Take a break from scouring YouTube for the night, and catch some very real videos on the big screen, served with a side of stand-up. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;ANASTASIA BARBALIOS Thurs., March 2, 8pm. $15. World Cafe Live, 3025 Walnut St. foundfootagefest.com

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A Midsummer Nightâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Dream Barrymore Award-winning director Matt Pfeiffer recreates the Shakespeare classic at The Arden. Starring local actors, the comedic play is set in an enchanted forest, where fairies, humans and amateur actors putting on a play. | Through April 9. $36-$52. Arden, 40 N. Seconf St. ardentheatre.org COMEDY

Matt& Expect nothing and enjoy everything at this 100 percent improv comedy show.

Funnyman Matt Holmes picks random audience members to perform his style of unpredictable comedy each night; no two shows are ever the same. | 8:30pm. $5. Good Good Comedy Theatre, 215 N. 11th St. goodgoodcomedy.com STAGE

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time Mark Haddonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s best-selling novel, and this yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s One Book, One Philadelphia selection heads to the stage in this adaptation of the Tony Award-winning play by Simon Stephens. When 15-yearold Christopher is accused of killing his neighborâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dog, he uses his exceptional

IQ to ďŹ nd out who out really did it. | Through March 5. $20-$105. Academy Of Music, 240 S. Broad St. kimmelcenter.org

FRIDAY, MARCH 3 COMEDY

Adam Ferrara Performing stand-up that makes humor out of the truth of reality, Ferrara has been nominated twice for Best Male Stand-Up. He can be seen as a host on Top Gear, and is known for his roles on Nurse Jackie and Rescue Me. | March 2-5. $16-$34. Helium Comedy Club, 2031 Sansom St. heliumcomedy.com STAGE

Irish-ish: A Trio of Irish Tales Celebrate the luck of the Irish with a performance of three works by Philadelphia playwrights Gariel Henninger, Sean Connolly and Alex McCormick. The audience will take a ride aboard a magic SEPTA train, ending up at an Irish pub ďŹ lled with seedy characters and dark beers. | March 2-11. $10-$15. Tavern on Ridge, 6080 Ridge Ave. manayunktheatreco.org TOUR

Shaping Shakespeare This hands-on tour at the Rosenbach allows participants access to rare and important items that are not usually on view to the public. See some of Shakespeareâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s earliest printings and books that inspired his plots. | 3pm. $15. Rosenbach Museum, 2008 Delancey Place. rosenbach.org SCREEN

2017 Philadelphia Screendance Festival Nora Gibson Contemporary Ballet presents a two-day dance-for-camera ďŹ lm festival, featuring 20 short ďŹ lms from around the world. | March 3-4. Performance Garage, 1515 Brandywine St. noragibsoncontemporaryballet.com 0$5&+ 0$5&+

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DRINK

SATURDAY, MARCH 4

Philadelphia Craft Beer Festival

EVENT

Camp-In

Named one of the â&#x20AC;&#x153;Top 10 Beer Festivals in Americaâ&#x20AC;? by Forbes Traveler, this beer lovers paradise offers more than 200 craft beer tastings from 75 of the best breweries from around the world. This yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s participants include Starr Hill, Magic Hat, Guiness, Ballast Point, Sly Fox and many more. VIP ticket holders will receive a commemorative glass plus an additional hour of tastings where theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be able to talk to brewers before crowds arrive. The event also includes grub from Phillyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ďŹ nest street chefs, including Cow and the Curd, Kono Pizza, Hai Street Kitchen and more. | Sat., March 4, 12:30pm. $12-$75. Navy Yard, 4747 S. Broad St. phillycraftbeerfest.com

Explore the Franklin Institute at night during the coolest sleepover event ever.

The camp-in features live science shows, hands-on workshops, stargazing in the rooftop observatory, and checking out all the permanent exhibits. | 6:15pm. $39.50-$59.50. Franklin Institute, 20th Street & Benjamin Franklin Parkway. ďŹ .edu BENEFIT

Divas: A Drag Cabaret Stella Dâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Oro hosts this musical trip through time featuring the songs of divas old and young. The Philadelphia Gay Menâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Chorus fundraiser will include dinner, dancing, rafďŹ&#x201A;es and fun prizes. All proceeds will go toward the PGMCâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s outreach efforts with a portion of ticket sales supplying a local school with much needed musical instruments. | 7pm. $45-$60. William Way LGBT Community Center, 1315 Spruce St. pgmc.org SCREEN

Israeli Film Festival Now in its 21th season, the Israeli Film Festival is a celebration of Israeli culture through feature ďŹ lms, dramas, comedies and documentaries. Nancy Spielbergâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s On the Map headlines the 13 ďŹ lm offering with a special appearance by basketball star Tal Brody. | March 4-April 2.

International House, 3701 Chestnut St. iffphila.com

SUNDAY, MARCH 5 EVENT

Paleopalooza The annual festival of fossils features dozens of activities and prehistoric fun.

Make cretaceous crafts, take a guided tour of Dinosaur Hall, create a dino puppet, hunt for fossils and more during the two-day fest. | March 4-5. Academy of Natural Sciences, 1900 Benjamin Franklin Parkway, 215.299.1000. ansp. org 3+,//<:((./< &20

FOOD

The Brewerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Plate Fair Food presents Brewers Plate, the annual beer and food pairing festival with a commitment to buy fresh, buy local.

The fest brings together the areas chefs, farmers, food artisans, brewers, distillers, and winemakers for a taste of the best food and drink the city has to offer. | 4pm. $67-$130. Kimmel Center, 300 S. Broad St. brewersplate.com FOOD

Let Them Eat Cake Phillyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cake design competition is back for another round of delicious delights.

Local and celebrity chefs face off in the decoration contest and will be backed by live music, champagne, door prizes and more. Proceeds beneďŹ t Variety, a childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s charity working to improve the quality of life for children with special needs. | 6pm. Loews Philadelphia, 12th and Market sts. varietyphila.org

MONDAY, MARCH 6 FOOD

East Passyunk Restaurant Week More than 25 restaurantsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;including

Izumi, P.O.P.E., Le Virtu, Fond, Marraâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Noir and Statesideâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;serve up special brunch, lunch and dinner menus, priced at $15, $25 or $35. Try a new restaurant (or a few), and experience all the great dining East Passyunk has to offer. | Through March 10. Various locations. eastpassyunkrestaurantweek.com

dance styles and musical genres in his performances. | 8pm. $39.50-$79.50.

Merriam Theater, 250 S. Broad St. kimmelcenter.org

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 8 SHOW

TUESDAY, MARCH 7 EVENT

FLIRT Philly Auction yourself offâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;or pick up a date for St. Patrickâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Dayâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;at this charitable auction beneďŹ ting PAWS (Philadelphia Animal Welfare Society). Fox29 host Alex Holley will serve as mistress of ceremony. Show your puppy love and pick up a PUP-Tini courtesy of Titoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Vodka. | 6pm. $10. XFINITY Live! 1100 Pattison Ave. phillypaws.org DANCE

Shaping Sound Emmy-Award winning choreographer Travis Wallâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Shaping Sound dance company heads to Philly with a new show titled â&#x20AC;&#x153;After the Curtain.â&#x20AC;? Wallâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; who is known for his work on So You Think You Can Dance and guest appearances on Ellenâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;uses a mash-up of

Cirque Du Soleil: Toruk In its dazzling acrobatic style, Cirque Du Soleil transports you to the world of Pandora in a performance inspired

by James Cameronâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Avatar. In this prequel, two hunters travel the roads in search of a crew that will help them battle their most feared enemy, Toruk. | March 8-12. Wells Fargo Center, 3601 S. Broad St. cirquedusoleil.com DANCE

Les Ballets Trockadero de Monte Carlo â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Trocks,â&#x20AC;? as they are affectionately known, are an all-male troupe of ballerinas in tutus and pointe shoes performing comedic renditions of classic ballets.

Tonightâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s performance will include their rendition of â&#x20AC;&#x153;Swan Lakeâ&#x20AC;? as well as â&#x20AC;&#x153;La Emeralda.â&#x20AC;? March 8-12. Prince Theater, 1412 Chestnut St. princetheater.org 0$5&+ 0$5&+

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THE BACKSTORY

Punk band shows love to LGBT community

T

he aftermath of the sour grapes that was the presidential election is still the fuel behind a lot of good happening throughout the country and across our region.

On Feb. 24, local punk band Mannequin Pussy headlined a show at Johnny Brendaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in Fishtown to beneďŹ t the Trevor Project. With the help of supporting acts Abi Reimold, King Azaz and Caracara, the concert raised over $3,000 for the 24-hour suicide hotline committed to gay and transgender youth. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The show was inspired by the emotional aftermath of the election â&#x20AC;&#x201C; the feeling that truly putting your time, effort, money and support into organizations who now ďŹ nd themselves on the front lines of this new administration seemed urgent,â&#x20AC;? said Marisa Dabice, vocalist and guitarist of Mannequin Pussy. â&#x20AC;&#x153;[So the thought] really was how can we, as musicians and artists, engage with our communities, especially those that support us?â&#x20AC;?

James Lecesne, Peggy Rajski and Randy Stone are ďŹ lmmakers who founded

L

the Trevor Project in 1998 after their short ďŹ lm Trevor received an Oscar. The organization was the ďŹ rst of its kind to provide lifeline support to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning youth from suicide prevention trainings and other community resources.

While the concert was planned months in advance, the fundraiser couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have arrived at a better time. On Feb. 22, ofďŹ cials from the Department of Justice and Education explained their decision to revoke former President Obamaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Title IX protection of transgender rights. The joint letter outlined their position against nondiscrimination laws that require transgender students to use the bathroom of their choice.

This comes as no surprise. Montana, Oklahoma, North Carolina and Arkansas have already drafted their own anti-LGBTQ legislation. In Pennsylvania, Governor Tom Wolfe stressed his support for the LGBTQ community in a statement for Fox News. However, organizations like the American Family Association of Pennsylvania and Alliance

Defending Freedom support the reversal.

In response, Philadelphia has been showing up for trans youth. On Feb. 23, School District of Philadelphia Superintendent William R. Hite Jr. released a statement to reafďŹ rm that the districtâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bathroom policy wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t change despite recent news. Additionally, in a joint press release from the Liberty LGBT Democratic Club, Philadelphia Federation of Teachers president Jerry Jordan explained trans students should use bathrooms reďŹ&#x201A;ecting their gender identity, suggesting anything otherwise as inhumane. Mayor Jim Kenney also expressed public support for LGBTQ youth on Thursday. On Feb. 25, the Equality Coalition organized a demonstration in Center City featuring speeches from local activists.

However, there is still work to be done. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Policies are great as they provide direction and even a legal standpoint to protect our students,â&#x20AC;? said Anthony Leon, the youth education coordinator at Center Cityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s LGBTQ haven, the Mazzoni Center. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I can very much pic-

ture a situation in which a parent or a group of parents that disagree with the local school policies will feel empowered by the actions of the Trump Administration actions to challenge the [Philadelphia School District] in court.â&#x20AC;?

Next month, the Supreme Court will hear 17-year-old Gavin Grimmâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s case against the Gloucester County School Board, which determines the constitutionality around the bathroom debate.

Shortly after reintroducing himself, the sophomore was denied access to male bathrooms and instead assigned an alternative, private facility. Grimm is represented by the ACLU of Virginia. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We still have young trans people and especially young black trans woman being murdered just because they identify as transgender,â&#x20AC;? Leon added. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Many times those crimes go unsolved and unfortunately the local media has at times misgendered individuals and/or shared information that was irrelevant to solving the crime.â&#x20AC;? Q â&#x20AC;&#x201C; DANIELLE CORCIONE | @DECORCIONE

Democrats scramble to fix mess in 197th District

ocal Democratic leaders are in position to lose an overwhelmingly Democratic district.

As of Tuesday, they comprised 85 percent of registered voters in the state Houseâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 197th District. The problem?

None of them are on the ballot anymore.

Following a judgeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s order to decertify the original Dem nominee for failing to meet residency requirements, the Pennsylvania Democratic Party is now making a Hail Mary plea to the Commonwealth Court to get Emilio Vazquez, Democratic leader of North Phillyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 43rd Ward, onto the ballot just three weeks before the special election.

As it stands, Republican Lucinda Little is the only ofďŹ cial candidate on the ballot. Green Party nominee Cheri Honkala, who missed the original ďŹ ling deadline, is now running as a write-in candidate.

And if the petition to certify Vazquezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s candidacy is denied? Well, Democrats might hop on the write-in boat as well.

3+,//<:((./< &20

It wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be the strangest thing to happen in this districtâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s political telenovela.

In a highly unusual move last week, a Commonwealth Court judge ruled to remove Democratic nominee Freddie Ramirez from the ballot in a North Philly special election for the PA Houseâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 197th District.

Linda Kerns, an attorney for the Philadelphia Republican Party, ďŹ led a complaint last month alleging that Ramirez, who was handpicked by ward leaders in January to replace convicted former State Rep. Leslie Acosta, did not meet the residency requirements to run in the race.

State law requires at least one year of permanent residency prior to election.

Ramirez runs several mental health clinics within the 197thâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s boundaries.

Since 1988, he has also owned a residence in Hunting Park which he claims to be his permanent home. But at his hearing two weeks ago, Ramirez also admitted

to spending two to three days a week at an apartment he rents in Roxborough to spend time with his daughter, one night a week at his girlfriendâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s apartment in Bristol, Bucks County, and several weeks of the year traveling to Florida and Puerto Rico.

Commonwealth Court Judge Anne Coveyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 50-page order, in its attempt to make sense of Ramirezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s many admitted residences, emphasized the legal meaning of â&#x20AC;&#x153;domicileâ&#x20AC;? that is based on oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;present intention.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Based on the evidence, it is clear that, similar to his visits to his girlfriendâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s home, his visits to [his Hunting Park home on West Annsbury Street] are due solely to the locationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s proximity to his busiest clinic,â&#x20AC;? Covey wrote.

Covey also noted that Ramirezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s own testimony about his Annsbury Street home was based on a past, not present, relationship to the property. Bonin said he was disappointed with Coveyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s asses-

ment.

Kerns, who ďŹ led the complaint on behalf of three district residents, did not mince words about the Democratic partyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s choice of a nominee. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The people in that district deserve better, and the Democrats canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just rubber stamp whoever they want or whoever ward leaders handpick,â&#x20AC;? she said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;People should be paying attention to this stuff.â&#x20AC;?

The decision has not sat well with some in the district..

On Monday, Spirit News reported that Republican candidate Little found a threatening handwritten note at her home, which read â&#x20AC;&#x153;You Will Pay Bitch For Fred.â&#x20AC;? A complaint was ďŹ led with the Philadelphia police. Q â&#x20AC;&#x201D; MAX MARIN | TWITTER: @MAXMMARIN 0$5&+ 0$5&+

SAVAGE LOVE:

DAN SAVAGE

F

ortyish, straight, white dude here.

I have this weird (possibly misogynistic) belief that, when it comes to sex, I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t win. Actually, I think men in general canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t win. Thoughtful, wellmeaning men at least. It comes down to this: During sex, if the man doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t come, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the manâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fault, because he clearly has problems with his dick and is barely even a man and should be ashamed of himself.

If the woman doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t come, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s also the manâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fault, because heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s clearly bad at sex and doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even care and is barely even a man and should be ashamed of himself. So am I a misogynist or just a guy with issues? Any advice for me moving forward?

-Yeah, I Got Issues If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been with women who blamed you when you didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t come, YIGI, and then turned around and blamed you when they didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t come, well, that had to be annoying. Or maybe youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re referring to something in the ether and not to any inability-to-climax/inability-to-induceclimax shaming youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve actually come in for. (Have you been with women who shamed you like this? If so, and again, that had to be annoying. Have you been with any women at all? If not, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s possible your letter is an MRA setup and/or youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re a misogynist with issues.)

If this has actually happened to you, YIGI, chalk it up to â&#x20AC;&#x153;some people are awful, women are people, some women are awfulâ&#x20AC;? and let it go. And remember this about men: Sometimes we come during sex, sometimes we donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t, the number of times we donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t increases with age.

Focus more on intimacy, connection, and mutual pleasure, YIGI, and less on spooging all over everythingâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and seek partners with the same focus.

As for women: You do know that dick

0$5&+ 0$5&+

I

â&#x20AC;&#x2122;m a fan from way back. A therapist told me to go out and have some funâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m a married woman with teen boys and feeling a bit lonelyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;but Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not looking to have an affair. I just want a spanking now and then. I found the one kink club I visited in New York to be kind of depressing, and my spanking friends are more of a social group who hang out on the weekends. I just need a little recreationâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;some good, clean spanking fun. Would love your advice.

-Seeks Paddling And Needs Know-How Kink enthusiasts, like dentists and accountants and troglodytes (hey there, CPAC), have conventions, SPANK, where like-minded/employed/aroused folks meet and socialize before heading up to their hotel rooms for some good, clean kinky fun. I think you should get your ass to one of the many spanking conventions out thereâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and so does Jillian Keenan, journalist and author of Sex with Shakespeare, a memoir about your shared kink (spanking) and how Shakespeareâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s plays helped Keenan discover and accept herself, as a human being and as a kinkster. (It sounds like a stretch, I realize, but do yourself a favor and read Sex with Shakespeareâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a funny, moving read, and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s packed with fresh and convincing kinky reads on Shakespeareâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s plays.)

THEREâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S MORE SAVAGE LOVE!

Read more at PHILLYWEEKLY.COM Ask a question: MAIL@SAVAGELOVE.NET

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PHILADELPHIAWEEKLY.COM/CONTESTS Jose Llana and Laura Michelle Kelly in Rodgers & Hammersteinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s The King and I. Photo by Matthew Murphy.

Come Now

alone isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t gonna do it for most women, right? Only a small percentage of women can come from PIV intercourse alone. (If you didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know, you know now, and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re welcome.) And youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re familiar with the clitoris, right? (If you werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t, Google it, and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re welcome.) But if you ďŹ nd yourself in bed with a woman and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re having difďŹ cultly helping her come (youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re there to help, not make), ask her if she can make herself come. If she canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t, odds are you wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be able to help her come, eitherâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;not you, not anyone else. If she can make herself come, ask her to masturbate to climax while you watch. Make a close study of what works for her. If she touches herself in a certain way, learn to touch her in that way. If she busts out a vibrator, use that vibrator before, during, and after PIV or instead of PIV. Good luck.

MAR 22 â&#x20AC;&#x201C;APR 2 KIMMELCENTER.ORG NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. One entry per person or address. Winners will be chosen at random. One pair of tickets to a Broadway Philadelphia Production for each winner. Tickets cannot be exchanged, transferred or redeemed for cash, in whole or in part. We are not responsible if, for any reason, winner is unable to use his/ her ticket in whole or in part. Void where prohibited by law. Participating sponsors, their employees and family members and their agencies are not eligible.

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Bryant & Wilde Realty, LLC 210 W. Rittenhouse Sq. | Suite 405 | Phila., PA 19103 www.bryantrealty.com | sales@ bryantrealty.com Diane Bryant: 610-529-8000 | Margie Wilde: 215-888.8500 OfďŹ ce: 215.893.6100 | Fax: 215.644.8826

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1011 S Colorado St .YHK\H[L /VZWP[HS c 389,900

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Other costs and fees may apply. Monthly P&I payment of $1303.64 based on a $265,000.00 loan amount, 360-month term, assumed credit score of 740 & loan-to-value of 80%. *P&I= Principal and Interest. These payments do not include amounts for taxes and insurance premiums; actual payment will be greater. NMLS #518005

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201 Queen St #2 8\LLU =PSSHNL c $579,900 214 Monroe St 8\LLU =PSSHNL | $669,000 200 Christian St #31 8\LLU =PSSHNL c $479,900 200 Christian St#10 8\LLU =PSSHNL c $705,000 730 Ellsworth St 7HZZ`\UR :X\HYL c $279,000 74 E Laurel St 5VY[OLYU 3PILY[PLZ c $549,900

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The Damon Michels Team 610.668.3400

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Specializing in MainLine & Center Cityâ&#x20AC;?

Damon Michels Damon@DamonMichels.com 265 Homes www.DamonMichels.com Sold in 2016 The William Penn House - Center City Living!

CENTER CITY PHILA.

NEW LISTING 1122 Greentree Lane, Penn Valley + 9\[&)%( 9Xk_2 (/+- jh ]k :Xg\ +00#''' 6 Buttonwood Drive, Exton * 9\[&)%( 9Xk_2 (,/' jh ]k Kfne_fd\ )/,#''' 1001 City Ave #EC1005, Wynnewood ) 9\[&) 9Xk_2 ())) jh ]k :fe[f (+,#''' 50 Belmont Ave #108, Bala Cynwyd ) 9\[&) 9Xk_2 ())/ jh ]k :fe[f *),#''' 400 N Ithan Avenue, Bryn Mawr , 9\[&*%) 9Xk_2 ,0-' jh ]k :fcfe`Xc (#(.,#''' 836 Lindy Lane, Bala Cynwyd * 9\[&+ 9Xk_2 ).,' jh ]k :fe[f ,,'#'''

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Studios $130,000 to $160,000 1 Bedrooms $250,000 to $300,000 2 Bedrooms $300,000 to $450,000 3 Bedrooms $400,000 to $550,000 @eZcl[\j i\Xc \jkXk\ kXo Â&#x203A; Ef kiXej]\i kXo

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NEW LISTING 333 Trevor Lane, Bala Cynwyd 6952 Sherwood Road, Greenhill Farms , 9\[&+%( 9Xk_2 *(,/ jh ]k :fcfe`Xc .,'#''' * 9\[&)%( 9Xk_2 )(,/ jh ]k :fcfe`Xc 410 Conshohocken State Rd, Bala Cynwyd *+0#''' + 9\[&)%) 9Xk_2 )0,. jh ]k :fcfe`Xc .''#''' 901 N Penn St #R301, 236 Ravenscliff Road, Radnor Northern Liberties , 9\[&*%( 9Xk_2 +'') jh ]k ) 9\[&) 9Xk_2 (+/0 jh ]k :fe[f ,.,#''' :fek\dgfiXip .)+#''' 296 Sycamore Ave, Merion Station JUST REDUCED 2201 Chestnut St #804, , 9\[&-%( 9Xk_ EfidXe[p (#.),#''' Rittenhouse Sq 559 Manayunk Rd, Bala Cynwyd + 9\[&)%( 9Xk_2 ).'/ jh ]k :fcfe`Xc ,)0#''' ) 9\[& (%( 9Xk_2 (),' jh ]k :fe[f */0#''' 2200-28 Arch St. #1107, Logan Square 175 E Old Gulph Road, Wynnewood + 9\[&)%( 9Xk_2 *-.- jh ]k :fek\dgfiXip /+0#''' ) 9\[&) 9Xk_2 (*'' jh ]k :fe[f ,++#000 109 W. Porter St., Whitman 1645 Mount Pleasant Road, Villanova JUST REDUCED , 9\[&,%* 9Xk_ KiX[`k`feXc fe )%., 8Zi\j (#-''#''' * 9\[&( 9Xk_2 ('-) jh ]k Ifn_fd\ (/,#''' 6 Crest Lane, Swarthmore 1307 Kater St, Bella Vista 442 Fawn Hill Lane, Penn Valley * 9\[&)%( 9Xk_2 ),() jh ]k Kl[fi +00#''' * 9\[&)%) 9Xk_2 )-*/ jh ]k Kne_j /0,#''' 118 Rockland Ave, Merion Station + 9\[&*%( 9Xk_2 +*'( jh ]k :fcfe`Xc /+0#''' * 9\[&( 9Xk_2 ()+/ jh ]k Kn`e *(0#''' 240 Twinings Lane, Wayne 1919 Walnut St, Rittenhouse Sq 201 Haverford Rd, Wynnewood , 9\[&,%) 9Xk_2 .))( jh ]k :fcfe`Xc (#,00#0'' .''' jh ]k :fdd\iZ`Xc JgXZ\ *#0,'#''' + 9\[&)%( 9Xk_2 )('' jh ]k :fcfe`Xc CONDO LIVING 191 Presidential Blvd, Bala Cynwyd ,(0#0'' 5404 Parkview Drive, Haverford 306 Clwyd Road, Bala Cynwyd 824-25: ) 9\[&) 9Xk_2 )('' jh ]k :fe[f +),#''' * 9\[&)%( 9Xk_2 )0-) jh ]k :fe[f 000#000 , 9\[&)%* 9Xk_2 ,+)' jh ]k IXeZ_ -00#''' 1750 Oakwood Ter 16G, Penn Valley 1600 Hagys Ford, Penn Valley 828 Summit Road, Penn Valley ) 9\[&) 9Xk_2 :fe[f Xk FXb ?`cc )+0#,'' Le`k />1 ( 9\[&( 9Xk_2 .-- jh ]k 00#''' + 9\[&)%( 9Xk_ Kl[fi .''#''' 191 Presidential Blvd, Bala Cynwyd 8cjf XmX`cXYc\ ]fi I\ek (#0''&dfek_ 2 Roselawn Ave, Lansdowne R901: ( 9\[&( 9Xk_2 0+* jh ]k :fe[f ()'#''' + 9\[&(%( 9Xk_2 (..' jh ]k :fcfe`Xc (00#'''

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1032 Christian St. Bella Vista FIRST TIME OPEN Sunday, March 5th from 12:00 to 2:30

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528 Conshohocken St Rd, Gladwyne 4 Bed/2.1 Bath; 2664 sq ft Colonial $685,000

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Great New Listing in Bella Vista with garage parking. Four bedrooms, 2.5 baths, hardwood ďŹ&#x201A;oors throughout, great deck off the custom built cooks kitchen and one off the main Suite, ďŹ replace and garden.

$749,900

Patrick Conway

Kathy Conway

215-266-1537 215-850-3842 6RFLHW\ +LOO 2I´ FH Â&#x2021; Â&#x2021; 3OHDVH YLVLW XV RQOLQH DW www.conwayteam.com

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