The Official (only!) Newspaper of The Red River Gorge
The Adventures of a Lifetime Await!
Okay, maybe I was a just a tad over the top.
You know, slightly, a wee bit, somewhat excessively exuberant. But then again, maybe not.
Here in the Red River Gorge Area you can explore, enjoy and appreciate the country’s most diverse and unforgettable vacation destination.
Of course that’s just my opinion and I do admit to a bias.
I’m Kentucky Lucky - born and bred right here in these beautiful mountains.
However, I’m of the mind that after you have been here a few days, you just might agree with me.
No, I take that back. After your stay here whether you hike, kayak, camp, zip, enjoy and photograph the unique and awe inspiring natural beauty or just relax in the quiet serenity of these ancient mountains, I’m betting you will agree.
Around here, when you’re invited to, “Make yourself at home”, we really mean just that.
Finally April
Glory Hallelujah! It’s finally APRIL!
Spring is here for sure. There’s no denying it, I love SPRING . All the newness. All the freshness.
The colors of spring are delicate and subtle. Pale yellows and faint pinks. Soft blues and fresh verdure of new grasses.
As far as I’m concerned, April is the beginning of my New Year. Time to plan for more time outdoors. There’s no prettier place on God’s Earth than the The Red River Gorge Area in April.
My wife, Jennifer, thinks May is the perfect month but I belive there is no month to compare with April. It even has the prettiest name of all the months.
The birds love April so much they sing about it all day and into the night. Just step outside and listen. Take a stroll anywhere in the area. Just stepping out your door will fill your senses with April’s bounty of sights and sounds.
The wildflowers definitely love it and hurry to flash their pastel colors before the early leaves on the buckeyes and hickories begin to block the new sun.
April is the month all of us have been waiting for since last November. Oh, sure, March is the month when Spring officially starts, but March is so unpredictable. And it’s also true that May is when things really get rolling. Birds with young, cherry blossoms and regular 70’s for temperatures, but April is still special.
This month is when you know Spring is here and there’s only a slim chance it’ll disappoint you with a freezing night or two.
April gets its name from either the Latin verb aperire, meaning to open, or from the Roman derivation of Aphrodite, Aprilis. Aphrodite was the Greek goddess of love and beauty. I feel either or both origins is/are appropriate. It combines them both as opening the beauty of Spring!
Like I said, April opens the year for me, is beautiful and I love it!
Publisher
Jenny Ison
Editor
Jerry Ison
Contributors
Jerry Ison
Miranda Fallen
Nancy Hamann
Sally Cox
Graphics
Ingrid Miller Red River Gorge Earth Shop
State, County & City Facilities
Natural Bridge State Resort Park General Information 606.663-2214 or 1-800-325-1710 (reservations) 2135 Natural Bridge Rd. Slade, KY 40376 Trail map & descriptions, park laws and regulations, lodging, camping, group meeting facilities, group programs "Natural Bridge State Resort Park is hiking, arches, exploring, scenery, reflection, and making memories." www.parks.ky.gov/findparks/resortparks/nb
Kentucky State Nature Preserve Commission www.naturepreserves.ky.gov
Red River Gorge National Geological Area 606) 663-8100
www.fs.fed.us/r8/boone/districts/cumberland/redriver_gorge.shtml Gladie Cultural-Environmental Learning Center 606.663-8100 www.fs.fed.us/r8/boone/districts/cumberland/gladie.shtml
Red River Gorge Trail Crew (Volunteers) www.RRGTC.com Leave No Trace – Outdoor Ethics www.lnt.org
Kentucky State Parks - Create your own Experience. www.parks.ky.gov Become a KYSP fan at: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Kentucky-State-Parks/152588316577
Lee County Tourism Commision Dedra Brandenburg Director 606.464.5038 www.visitleecountyky.com
Private Facilities
Cliffview Resort & Cliffview Retreat 606.668.6222 www.cliffviewresort.com 455 Cliff View Road, Campton, KY 41031
The Lodge, The Retreat and Lakeside Lodges are available for groups, weddings and retreats. Also available is the 8,000 sq foot Reception Hall Red River Gorge Zip Lines 855.ZIP.TOUR 855.947.8687 606.668.6222 www.redrivergorgezipline.com
Scenic Cabin Rentals 606.663.0000 www.sceniccabin.com
Black Bear Lodge Motel 606.663.0061
Red River Gorge Cabin Rentals 844.692.2246 www.redrivergorgecabinrentals.com The Gorge Underground 844.254.6244 Thrillsville.org The Red River Inn On Parkway, Campton
The Gorge Gazette Jenny or Jerry Ison 865.674.6740 Email stories, ideas, suggestions, news to: jerrywrison@gmail.com
T TT Things To Do, Places To Visit, hings To Do, Places To Visit, hings Do, Places hings Do, Places Where To Eat In
The Red River Gorge Where The River Gorge
• Red River Gorge Earth Shop Local Art gallery & Gift Shop 606.668.5228 Nat Bridge Rd. Slade
• Red River Climbing Guides where “Your Adventure Awaits!” Catering to all ages and experience levels. Visit: RedRiverClimbingGuides.com or call 629.207.0697
• HillTop Pizza: Pizza, Salads, Subs, Spaghetti, Lasagna. Delivery to Cliffview available. 606.464.9990 2034 Hwy 11N Beattyville.
• Daniel Boone Coffee Shoppe & Deli: Gourmet Coffees, Deli Foods, Camping Supplies 606-663-2549 Natural Bridge Road (KY Rt. 11) near Slade Exit 33
• Gorge Underground: A Unique Waterborne Family Adventure On The Water, Underground! Kayak and Pontoon Boat Tours 844-254-6244 Thegorgeunderground.com
• Natural Bridge State Park, Lodge & Sky Lift: Camping, Hiking, Rooms, Fine Dining parks.ky.gov/resortparks/nb/index.htm
• Mill Creek Lake: Kayak & SUP Rentals 859.300.1330
• Red River General Store: Hand Dipped Ice Cream, Hoodies, Gifts, Camping Supplies, T-Shirts Fudge, Local Artisan Crafts 1321 Natural Bridge Road (KY Rt. 11) Slade, KY 606.663.885
• Daniel Boone Liquor: 606-663-2549; Natural Bridge Rd (KY Rt 11)
• Red River Gorge Hiking, Rock Climbing: fs.fed.us/r8/boone/
• Red River Adventure: Kayaking and Canoeing redriveradventure.net 606-663-1012
• Via Ferrata Rock Climbing Park: Great for beginners 606-668-6441 torrentfalls.com
• Mr. Ed’s Hot Dogs Great Hot Dogs smothered with Famous Chili Sauce 209 N. Main Stanton, KY 606.569.8170 Check us on Facebook
• The Well Beattyville’s only liquor store selling Liquor, Beer & Wine Come down and sip a glass sitting on the patio watching the Kentucky River flow. On rte 52 Beattyville 606.208.8017 tony@theboneyardwell.com
• Beech Fork Golf Club: In Clay City - 606-663-9479
• Sag Hollow Golf Course: In Booneville 606-593-4653
• Beattyville Public Golf Course: Off Rt. 52 in Beattyville, KY 606.356.4199
If a Holiday Party, any Party, Family Reunion, Corporate Meeting, Church Retreat or Wedding is on your to-do list, go ahead and check it off. We have the perfect solution to party planning from catering to lodging to activities. The Lodge at Cliffview will sleep 64. The 7000 square foot Reception/Activity Center seats up to 250 and has a fully equipped commercial grade kitchen. Our newest Lodges, the Retreat and Lakeside will each sleep up to 50. Both have double appliances kitchens and technically compatible theater style media rooms Call: 606.668.6222 for details.
by Jerry Ison
Spring! Ah Spring! I love Spring. I love the word Spring. I love every little thing about Spring. To me, it is the beginning of a new, wonderful and beautiful period that is all too brief. Wow, was I waxing poetic or what? Well, the truth is I really do feel that way about Spring. As you see, I think Spring is so important the word must be capitalized.
Spring is the time of rebirth, new life. Spring is when you finally realize that dreadful, unbearable cold winter is over. Okay, I admit, that this past winter wasn't so bad, but still, winter, even a mild one, is just not my cup of tea.
Another thing that makes Spring so attractive to me is that it is made up of the "female" months, April, May and June. Some sources say Spring months are March, April and May, but I disagree. Since Spring is the time between the vernal equinox (March 20 - 22) and the summer solstice (June 20 - 22) only one week of March and at least three weeks of June fall into that time frame. Based on that reasoning, March is really a winter (yuck) month and June is really a Spring (Yeah!) month.
The word Spring may have come from the Dutch or German, springen, which according to my very German friend, Ernest Wahl, means to move quickly. You know, “schnell!”. And that's very appropriate 'cause, in case you hadn't noticed, things do move or happen very quickly in the Spring.
As soon as the sun starts to warm the ground, plants shoot out of the earth. In some cases, they grow so fast, unwary insects are actually caught inside. This is especially true of mushrooms like the elusive and delicious morel.
Another, archaic, definition of Spring is the dawn or dawning as of day or light. I like this one too, because for many living things it is indeed the dawning of a new day, the dawning of new life. Then of course there's the celebration of the Resurrection, Easter, the most important event on the Christian calendar.
All in all Spring is the thing!
A Gaggle and a Murder A Gaggle and a Murder
A Gaggle Murder A Gaggle Murder
by Buckminster “Buck” Thorn
Here are a few little bits that may be useable. Or maybe not ...
Everybody knows a bunch of geese on the ground is called a gaggle, but what is a bunch of geese on the wing called?
A skein or, if flying in a V, a wedge.
I also have the answer to the age-old question, “Why is one side of a flight of geese always longer than the other?”
I have read many theories and what some claim to be scientific reasons. Many of those ‘answers’ say it is to help the lead goose use less energy so the whole wedge can fly longer since they frequently swap out that lead position.
Other lines of thought say stuff about vortexes, drafting, air and heat convection currents and so on and so on and scooby, dooby, doo.
I have the ultimate final and definitive answer. It is, in fact, an unarguable answer.
There are more geese in the longer side!
While we’re talking about groups of animals a group of turtles is an army, a gang of lions is a pride, that of whales is a pod and a bunch of crows is a murder.
But, you might ask, what do we call groups of people besides, well, groups? There really are only a few that readily come to mind.
When it comes to good looking women we say a bevy of beauties, angry gatherings are called mobs and there are teams, but not every bunch has a title.
For instance wouldn’t it be appropriate to call convent graduates a blessing of nuns? How about a bench of judges, a flush of plumbers, a promise of candidates?
Oh, and we can’t leave out a column of writers!
What’s The Buzzzz?
by Sally Cox by Sally Cox by Sally Cox by Sally Cox
I got a real "bee in my bonnet" when I discovered that bees survived the mass extinction that wiped out the dinosaurs. Bees 65,000,000 - Tyrannosaurus 0! Way to go Bumbles! While dinosaurs were dropping like flies, bees were spreading across the entire planet adapting and evolving to different climates. So, the song "Stayin' Alive" by the "Bee" Gees is very on point. Prehistoric farmers from 9000 years ago were the first beekeepers who collected honey and beeswax for food, medicine, and ritualism. Early evidence has been found in traces of beeswax on ancient pottery and depicted in cave paintings of people collecting honey from wild bees over 10,000 years ago. Due to the honey’s unique preservative properties, it has been found in 3,000 year old pots discovered in Egyptian tombs and is still edible. Its high sugar content, low water content, and trace amounts of hydrogen peroxide create an antimicrobial slurry ideal for medicine too. Ancient Rome, Greece, and Egypt revered bees as the servants of the gods while worshipping them for their alleged medicinal and spiritual powers. It was believed the tears of the Egyptian sun God Ra were transformed into working bees when they fell on the desert sand But, bee-ware! Many of Kentucky’s wild rhododendrons and mountain laurels contain andromedotoxin in their nectar and pollen which poison the bees and the honey they produce.
That honey is widely known as "mad honey" due to its hallucinogenic properties. When ingested, this mad honey intoxication may result in dizziness, weakness, nausea, and other negative side effects.
Rest assured, the local farm produced honeys in the Gorge region are harvested in areas of native flowering plants like clover guaranteeing safe and delicious honey. Mad honey is darker and redder with a bitter sharp taste making it undesirable to sellers and buyers. The intoxicating effects of mad honey were recorded by ancient Greek philosophers Aristotle and Pliny the Elder. An invading Greek army was accidentally poisoned by harvesting and eating the local honey. Although, they survived, King Mithridates later used the honey as a bioweapon against the invading Roman Army who suffered the same deleterious symptoms making them vulnerable to a successful counter attack.
Today, bees are seen as noble warriors of the ecosystem. Scientific research has discovered a plethora of "bee-dazzling" facts. Flowers can hear buzzing bees and in response, generate heat to attract the pollinators. The bees then reply with a vibration known as a floral buzz which stimulates the flower to release pollen.
The nectar is the bee's main source of carbohydrates and the pollen provides protein.
Bees are responsible for pollinating nearly a third of the world's crops. Field studies have recorded that bees are attracted to music with a 250-500 Hz frequency because it's similar to the din of the hive. This "low midrange" pulsation is within the lower harmonic sounds of many instruments including guitars, basses, and vocals.
So, if you want to attract bees to your yard or garden simply perform an orchestral or choral concert of the Beatles, "Let if Be-ee!
Tee hee!
“To provide basic and emergency care to all those in need.”
P.O. Box 51824
Knoxville, TN 37950
Phone: 865-584-7571
www.MissionofHope.org
Mi Finca- 318 Main St, Campton, ~ Kel's Patriot Pizza- 133 KY-15, Campton
Dixie Freeze II-194 Main St, Campton ~ Shebrews Coffee Shop-569 KY-15, Campton 145 Roadhouse- 148 Main St, Campton ~ Sky Bridge Station- 8 KY-715, Pine Ridge Hop's- 2613 KY-11, Campton ~ The Wicked Wolfe- 301 Mtn Pkway Spur, Campton Subway- 30 KY-15, Campton ~ Sweet Art by Stephanie- 110 Main St, Campton Dairy Queen- 690 KY-15, Campton ~ Red River Rockhouse- 4000 KY-11, Campton Bites & Bargains- 658 KY-205N, Campton ~ Spanks Franks- 1008 KY-191, Campton The Brick- 5412 KY-15 N, Pine Ridge ~ RedPoint Barbeque- 356 Smith Rd, Campton
