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FINAL WEEK SATIRE EDITION | THE END OF STUDENT APATHY | THE ART OF MAKING FRIENDS

TheBeaver

19.03.2013

Newspaper of the LSE Students’ Union FREE

Rayhan Uddin

On the backdrop of increasing opposition to the Government’s counter terrorism strategy, and in particular the Home Office scheme “Prevent”, the LSESU Anti-Racism Officer Mohamed Harrath convened a conference on “Campus Extremism, Freedom and Security.” The idea was to promote dialogue between some of the key stakeholders, and discuss how best the government can engage with Muslim students who many feel have been unfairly discriminated against by “Prevent.” 7KH ஊUVW VSHDNHU ZDV Doctor Phyllis Starkey, a former MP who was Chair of the Communities and Local Government Select Committee, which carried out a detailed review assessing the impact of Prevent. She spoke of how the government tried to “adopt Islamic theological positions, creating a more moderate form of Islam” which was then used to “spy on fellow Muslims”. The VFKHPH LGHQWLஊHG SULVRQV and universities as being “hotbeds” for developing extremist views. Starkey, however, was keen to point out “the hard evidence that university campuses are hotbeds for extremism is very weak”. She concluded that the government needs WRஊQGDEHWWHUEDODQFHIRU ensuring the security of all citizens, whilst protect the rights of individuals. Next was a panel discussion on ‘Prevent and UK campuses’ with Jonathan Birdwell, head of the Citizens Programme at the think tank Demos; Professor Ian Cram, head of the Law School at the University of Leeds; and Hicham Yezza, the chief editor of &HDVHஊUHPDJD]LQH'U.DL Spiekermann, lecturer in Political Philosophy at LSE, chaired the discussion. Birdwell stated the importance of “distinguishing between radical views that

lead to violence and radical views that do not”. He went on to say that banning extremist speakers inadvertently glamorises them and that instead we should allow them to speak, and come up with credible counter arguments. Professor Cram echoed many of Birdwell’s views, adding that in the UK a stronger defense was needed on “unpopular and dissenting” free speech. Hicham <H]]DWKHQWRRNWRWKH஋RRU to speak about his personal experience of Prevent, having been falsely arrested and detained for seven days for downloading a copy of the al-Qaeda manual, which at the time was available on the public domain, for his PhD studies. He concluded that Prevent has not made people feel any safer, and that since its inception, the scheme is likely to have done more harm than good. The next speaker was Trevor Phillips, former Chair of Equality and Human Rights Commission. His talk centred on tolerance, and how “the equality agenda must respect our diverse beliefs and preferences” and that “the biggest challenge is not how we live on this planet, but how we live with each other”. The discussion then moved on to the ‘Student Perspective: working together to create cohesive campuses’ with a panel discussion involving Pete Mercer, vice-President of the National Union of Students (NUS) and Omar Ali, President of Federation of Student Islamic Societies (FOSIS). Dr Jasmine Gani, of the International Relations department at LSE, chaired the talk. Mercer spoke of the NUS’s opposition to the Prevent strategy and how it victimises Muslim students. He pointed out that a successful motion was passed at the NUS Conference 2012, condemning the Prevent agenda. Omar Ali then spoke of the increasing

LSESU

Extremism conference at LSE

demonisation of Muslims in universities. He noted that “events are cancelled, sermons are censored, and prayer rooms are closed” leading to Muslims not having the same opportunities to express themselves as others. He also condemned government ministers such as Theresa May who unfairly attack organisations such as FOSIS. To this he said, “ISOCs and FOSIS are the mainstream of Muslim students. Attacking the mainstream will only push students to the fringes, which is counter-productive”. 7KH ஊQDO VSHDNHU WR DG dress the conference was Dr Muhammad Abdul Bari MBE, who among other things, was on the Organising Committee of the London Olympic and Paralympic Games. He stated that young Muslims played a huge part in contributing to the Olympic spirit last summer; and that in universities, Muslim students are at the forefront of campaigning, raising money for charity and organising debates. He went on to say that when these

students are seen through the prisms of “securitisation”, this poses the risk of “alienating a generation of young Muslims”. Dr Bari

concluded his address by praising the Students Union for hosting this conference at the LSE, where we “aim to understand things”.

Tech troubles knock out LSE internet Ira Lorandou

Last Monday, for just over an hour LSE’s internet access was out of action. There was a frantic rush as students were forcibly disrupted from working towards their looming deadlines. SU General Secretary Elect Jay Stoll tweeted, “Why is Moodle/ LSE For You down?! Absolutely unacceptable. Deadlines running wild at this time of the year. SORT IT OUT.” A resident of the postgraduate hall Sidney Webb House, commented that “in light of end of the end of term stress, facing even a moment of internet shutdown is extremely detrimental”. According to a spokesperson from the Information Management and Technology department (IMT), this was due to a failure “on part of our

PDLQ ஊUHZDOO ZKLFK PDQDJHV and controls all internet access from the LSE network), DQG WKHQ  RI RXU EDFNXS ஊUH wall which did not automatically take over.” Some phones were also out of action for this short time. Service was reVWRUHG ZKHQ WKH EDFNXS ஊUH wall became operational and the primary one “is now due to be replaced next week.” IMT FRQஊUPHGWKDWDWQRWLPHZDV the security of the network compromised. Realising that there was weak communication to students they also stated that they are “reviewing how we can communicate better with our students on the rare occaVLRQV ZKHQ VLJQLஊFDQW GLVUXS tions happen to the IT services here at the LSE”.

visit us online at thebeaveronline.co.uk and at twitter.com/beaveronline


2

Editorial

Editorial Board Executive Editor Liam Brown

editor@thebeaveronline.co.uk

19.03.2013

7KHBeaver

Managing Editor Matthew Worby

Established in 1949 Issue No. 791

News Editors Hayley Fenton Arisa Manawapat Ira Lorandou

Telephone: 0207 955 6705 Email: editor@thebeaveronline.co.uk Website: www.thebeaveronline.co.uk

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Sport Editor Dennis Mooney sports@thebeaveronline.co.uk

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| The Beaver

Collective A E Dawson, A Doherty, A Fyfe, A Krechetova, A L Cunningham, A L Gunn, A Manawapat, A Moneke, A X Patel, A Peters-Day, A Qazilbash, A Riese, A Sulemanji, A Thomson, A Wright, B Arslan, B Butterworth, B Clarke, B Phillips, B Rogers, C Loughran, C S Russell, C V Pearson, D McKenna, D Ming, D Poole, D Yu, E Beaumont, E Delahaye, E E Fraser, E Firth, E Nader, E S Dwek, F Bennett, F Wong, G K Chhina, G Everington, G Kaur, G MannersArmstrong, G Rosser, H Brentnall, H Burdon, H Dar, H Fenton, H J Sheppard, H Ramakrishnan, I Lorandou, I M Silver, J Allsop, J Attueyi, J Austin, J Curtis, J Jinruang, J Mo, J M Palmer, J M Still, J R Peart, J Stoll, J Tindale, J V Armstrong, J Wacket, J Wong, J Yarde, K C Hughes, K Kenney, K Pezeshki, K Rogers, K Singh, K Quinn, L A Yang, L Atchison, L Aumeer, L Brown, L Hill, L Kang, L Slothuus, L VardaxoJORX0&+H૸HUQDQ0'H-HVXV0 Fletcher, M Hung, M Jenkins, M Jaganmohan, M Pearson, M Pennill, M Petrocheilos, M Veale, M Worby, N Antoniou, N J Buckley-Irvine, N Jaroszek, N Mashru, N Mateer, N Thangarajah, N Russell, P Amoroso, P Gallagher, P Gederi, R A Coleman, R Chouglay, R Browne, R Cucchiaro, R Gudka, R Hamer, R Holmes, R Illingworth, R Chua, R J Charnock, R Serunjogi, R Uddin, S Ash, S Chaudhuri, S Desai, S Donszelmann, S Gale, S H Low, S Newman, S Nissila, S Parmar, S Poojara, S R Williams, S Sebatindira, S W Leung, S Hang Low, T Barnes, T Maksymiw, T Meaden, T Poole, V A Wong, V Chan, X T Wang

The Collective is The Beaverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s governing body. You must have contributed three pieces of work, or contributed to the production of three issues of the paper (editorially or administratively), to qualify for membership. If you believe you are a Collective member but your name is not on the list above, please email the Collective Chair at:

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The Beaver would like to thank the LSE students who contributed to this issue. Any opinions expressed herein are those of their respective authors and not necessarily those of the LSE Studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Union or Beaver (GLWRULDO6WD૸

6RPHŕ­˝QDOWKRXJKWV 8QLRQ%DVKÄ? Last Words Farewell then, readers. It seems there arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t any Top Gear lines left to steal.

%DVKÄ?LVWKH%HDYHUâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVKDLNX SRHW6RPHVD\WKDWKH WKLQNVDVRQHGRHVWKDWWKH FUHGLWFUXQFKLVVRPHNLQGRI EUHDNIDVWFHUHDODQGWKDWKHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV WHUULŕ­˝HGWKH/6(ZLOOUHYHDOKLV VDODU\EHFDXVHKHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVSDLGLQWKH VRXOVRIZDQQDEHLQYHVWPHQW DQNHUV

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been a long term. Dark, wet, cold and pretty foul. So weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re pretty pleased that in just a few short days we can all leave the classroom and go straight to the library to begin the revision season properly. Frankly these classes have taken way too much time up that could be better spent revising. In this last editorial we would like to thank everyone who has in any way contributed to the paper, be it authors, editors, photographers, or the people that did something amusing/odd/insane enough for us to put it in this little rag. Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s an

RGGIHHOLQJRIŕŽ&#x160;QDOLW\IRUWKH year with respect to stories. But be assured, if anything noteworthy does occur we will still be updating our website with content. So if you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get enough of the Beaver during the revision session you can always just pop online. $V ZH HQWHU WKH ŕŽ&#x160;QDO VWDJHVRIWKHŕŽ&#x160;UVWDFDGHPLF year of the Calhoun era we here at the paper have to say weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re hopeful that the trajectory will remain suitably positive. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not easy for an institution to bounce back quickly from someWKLQJOLNHWKH*DGGDŕŽ&#x160;VFDQ

The Beaver is published by the LSE Studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Union, East Building, Houghton Street, WC2A 2AE. Printed at Mortons Printing.

The Beaver is issued under a Creative Commons license. Attribution necessary.

dal, but thanks to the work of both Directors Rees and Calhoun, the corner seems Editor Election well and truly turned. Now if only this rag could let Announcement the decomposing corpse of a joke die. We live in hope We will be electing a new that we might get one satire Executive Editor, Managing section without them regurEditor, and Design Editor gitating the same jokes, but for the 2013-2014 academsuch is life. ic year. Voting takes place So, go forth, take some online this week. rest, have fun and maybe A Features Editor election even try that revising lark. will also take place, for a $QG LI \RX FDQ ŕŽ&#x160;OO RXW D survey about the school it term starting immediately. For more info email the might be worth it. ApparCollective Chair. Voting is ently it will alter the value of the degree you hope to hold open to collective members one day. only.


News

The Beaver | 19.03.2013

School ponders release of survey results be published include satisfaction with course content, Currently there is a proposal course lectures, feedback rein the works to release the ceived and also the proporresults from the teaching tion of students that would survey conducted by the LSE recommend the course to RQOLQH,WLVLQLWVŕŽ&#x160;QDOVWDJHV others. Other information of consultation prior to seek- that will be made available ing approval from the Aca- will include the average class size and exam results demic Board. If the Board approves it, from past years. However, academic dethe School would be able partments will have the freemake the survey results dom to exclude certain parts available to students before of their courses from the the 2013/14 academic year, practice. according to Professor Paul According to Duncan McKelly, the Pro-Director of Kenna, LSE Studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Union Teaching and Learning. (GXFDWLRQ 2IŕŽ&#x160;FHU WKH PRYH The results, taken over a aims to enable students to three year average, will be be more informed about the published under the newly courses they are studying redesigned â&#x20AC;&#x153;course guidesâ&#x20AC;? and to increase transparency section on the LSE website for each course. Results to in the School-student relaShu Hang

tionship. Despite this, McKenna harbours concerns that certain pieces of information could lead to â&#x20AC;&#x153;statistics chasingâ&#x20AC;? and a â&#x20AC;&#x153;race to the bottom in terms of the difficulty of exams, and therefore the rigour of our degreesâ&#x20AC;? as well as the potential for VWLŕŽ&#x2039;LQJ LQQRYDWLRQ DPRQJ WHDFKLQJ VWDŕŽ&#x2030; +RZHYHU KH believes that ultimately â&#x20AC;&#x153;students would want this information.â&#x20AC;? Luc Bovens, head of the Department of Philosophy, /RJLF DQG 6FLHQWLŕŽ&#x160;F 0HWKRG commented that the school needs to â&#x20AC;&#x153;think hardâ&#x20AC;? about survey design before going forward with the plan. â&#x20AC;&#x153;There should be a clear distinction between questions which are designed

IRU VWDŕŽ&#x2030; PRQLWRULQJ DQG LP provement (and should not be made public) and questions which are designed to have students provide asVHVVPHQWV IRU WKH EHQHŕŽ&#x160;W RI later cohortsâ&#x20AC;?, he said. He also noted some â&#x20AC;&#x153;worrisomeâ&#x20AC;? inconsistency in the teaching survey, and stressed that â&#x20AC;&#x153;survey presentationâ&#x20AC;? needs to be improved to address issues with the uptake of the survey. The practice of releasing internal teaching surveys to students is rare among universities in the UK. Last month, the Beaver was only able to obtain results for the 2012/13 Michaelmas Term teaching survey from the LSE through a Freedom of Information Request.

Candlelight vigil for Pakistanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s minorities News Team

On the evening of Friday 15th March 2013, the LSESU Pakistan Society organised a peaceful candlelight vigil, titled â&#x20AC;&#x153;Stop the Genocide: In Solidarity with the Minorities of Pakistanâ&#x20AC;? on Houghton

Street. In light of the current situation in Pakistan, with minority communities such as Shias, Christians, Hindus, being subjected to attacks of various forms (shootings, bombings, rape, loss of homes and livelihoods), the Pakistan Society decided to hold this event to VKRZŕŽ&#x160;UPRSSRVLWLRQDQGFRQ demnation to the actions of extremists as well as compassion towards all those who have VXŕŽ&#x2030;HUHG WUDJHGLHV RI YDULRXV kinds and live in continuous fear of their lives in a country founded on the very principle of the need to protect minority interests. This event was aimed at sending a message to Pakistanis and non-Pakistanis alike that Pakistan is for everyone, irrespective of their race, religion or creed, and it is only with greater unity that we can

progress. The event started at 6:30 pm with the National Anthem of Pakistan, followed by a special address by the Reverend of LSE, Dr. James Walters, who agreed to speak on this occasion. He expressed sadness at the situation in Pakistan, particularly with regard to Chris-

tians in the country. He spoke of how Pakistan should move towards reinforcing the secular, tolerant vision of its founder, Jinnah, and that the actions carried out by extremists were not representative of Islam. This was followed by short speeches by senior members of the LSE Studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Union (Community and Welfare Officer-elect, Annessa Mahmood, International Students Officerelect Hamza Jawaid, Education Officer-elect Rosie Coleman, Anti-Racism Officers â&#x20AC;&#x201C; current and elect) as well as Pakistan Society committee members. The crowd listened quietly with candles in their hands and was deeply moved by the personal stories and words of DOOWKRVHZKRVSRNH7KHŕŽ&#x2039;RRU was also open for volunteers from the audience to also say a few lines, Pakistanis and non-

Pakistanis alike. Finally, tea light candles were placed on the ground in the shape of the 3DNLVWDQŕŽ&#x2039;DJ A volunteer speaking at the event, Salman Muhajir, pointed out, â&#x20AC;&#x153;The current situation shows that Pakistan may be fractured, but it is certainly not broken.â&#x20AC;? Another speaker, Anam Afridi, said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;This vigil is dedicated to all those mothers who lost their sons, and all those fathers who lost their daughters in the ongoing killings.â&#x20AC;? In his address at the event, President of the LSESU Pakistan Society, Mir Moeen Mahmood said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;this is only the beginning and more must be done in every way to ensure that extremism in the country, especially against minorities, is eradicated. It is only with greater action that we can reinforce Jinnahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s vision of Pakistan where

as he said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;You are free to go to your temples, you are free to go to your mosques or to any other place of worship in this State of Pakistanâ&#x20AC;?. According to Mahmood, the event was â&#x20AC;&#x153;deeply emotional, moving, and sent a strong message that the youth of Pakistan is ready to unite to end the plight and atrocities and move towards a safer, peaceful Pakistan.â&#x20AC;? This event was covered by premier Pakistani news channels, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Geoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Duniyaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, as well as some free-lance journalists, and senior members of the Islamic Society and Christian Union were also present along with members of the general public. On behalf of the Pakistan Society, Mahmood said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;A big thank you goes out to all those who attended the event in spite of the harsh weather conditions.â&#x20AC;?

3

EVENTS IN BRIEF Turkish Night Tuesday 19 March 2013 7:30 - 11:59pm Underground There will be real delicious Turkish snacks alongside the Turkish drink Raki, not to mention some amazing Turkish music to dance the night away! All revenues will be donated to a charity in Turkey

Postgraduate Teaching & Research Committee Wednesday 20 March 2013 5 - 6pm The Quad Mezzanine Pizza and drinks will be provided Women Leaders of Tomorrow Social Wednesday 20 March 2013 8 - 10:30pm All Bar One, Kingsway

University of London End of Term Fundraiser: Combat Cancer - The Right to Health Wednesday 20th March 2013 3:30 - 6:30 pm Old Theatre All proceeds from the event will go to Basma Cancer Clinic and Palestine Childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Relief Fund Ruthless LSE Premiere Thursday March 21, 2013 8:30 - 10:30 pm Old Theatre Six months in the making, the eagerly anticipated LSE ]RPELHŕŽ&#x2039;LFNLVŕŽ&#x160;QDOO\KHUH Come join the stars of the ŕŽ&#x160;OPRQWKHUHGFDUSHW Free entry

LSE London Recruits Book Launch Friday March 22, 2013 6 pm Old Theatre LSE students were secretly UHFUXLWHGWRŕŽ&#x2039;\WR6RXWK $IULFDDQGŕŽ&#x160;JKWDJDLQVW the Apartheid government. After staying silent for decades, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;London Recruitsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; is their story.

GOT A SCOOP? Got a story that you think we should be printing? Send us an e-mail: news@thebeaveronline.co.uk


4

News

19.03.2013

| The Beaver

LSE falls behind in StudentBeans league tables Hayley Fenton

The London School of Economics may boast world class research facilities and high employment prospects, but recent league tables on StudentBeans. com reveal that LSE falls below average in the University Nandos League and the University Chocolate League. Research undertaken by the Student Beans website shows that LSE is lagging behind other universities not only in the average number of Nandos visits per term, but the percentage of students who eat chocolate everyday or most days. Despite the claim that dining out in London is more expensive in other cities being cited as a reason for LSEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s poor performance in the Nandos League, the top spot was secured by City University London, who averaged 3.1 visits to Nandos per term. Aston University and Anglia Ruskin University took the second and third spots respectively, with an average of 2.9 and 2.2 visits per term respectively.

Wreckage on ski trip Hayley Fenton

LSE trawled in 58th position, managing to scrape only 0.8 visits per term. Second year BSc Accounting and Finance student, and Nandos fanatic, Hannah Baker, was disappointed at what she felt was an under representation of Nandos enthusiasm at LSE, claiming to frequent Nandos at least once a week. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I refuse to believe the results on Student Beans are a comprehensive guide to the actual number of times LSE students visit Nandos a term. If anything, the number of time my friends and I go should be enough to push up the average at least an entire point. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I may email to complain.â&#x20AC;? Students took a less serious response to LSEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ranking in the University Chocolate Eating League, despite an even lower rating with LSE only managing to reach 84th position, where merely 38.5 per cent of students consume chocolate daily, or nearly every day. LSEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s chocolate consumption percentage is exactly half that of the university that

ing it to fourth position with a high ranking of 66.7 per cent. LSE somewhat salvaged its shockingly low positions in the University Chocolate Eating and Nandos League by reaching 24th place in the University Kebab League, with an average monthly kebab consumption of 0.85. Third year BSc Philosophy student, Kobi Finestone, was heartbroken at the lack of kebab chowing at LSE, confessing a strong desire for more LSE students to partake in kebabs. Finestone elaborated on his musings, stating â&#x20AC;&#x153;they [ke-

babs] are an excellent way to end the night. I never go for them sober, and most people I know donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t either, but that really shouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t limit how many we eat seeing that we are university students and sobriety is overrated anyway.â&#x20AC;? Although LSE managed to avoid slipping into the lowest ranks of the Kebab League, there is a considerable amount of kebab consumption that needs to be done if LSE students wish to see themselves in medal-worthy positions, with Aston University storming ahead of other institutions to WDNHŕŽ&#x160;UVWSODFHZLWKDQDYHUDJH

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Financial homogeniety is riskyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; The London Matthew Pennill

Professor Charles Goodhart The Beaver has learned that raised concerns over new over â&#x201A;Ź4,000 worth of damage banking regulations in a livewas caused by LSE students on ly public debate at the Old the Ski Trip to Val Thorens in Theatre last Monday. The inaugural event of the LSE Michaelmas Term 2012. NUCO Travel, a specialist Systemic Risk Centre (SRC), winter-sports holiday agency a research centre estabwho worked with the LSE Ski lished earlier this year with Committee to organise the the help of ÂŁ3.7m of governWULS FRQŕŽ&#x160;UPHG WR 7KH %HDYHU ment funding, brought together an esteemed panel of that the residence where LSE experts for a lively discusstayed in Val Thorens had a sion of the unintended contotal value of charges that exVHTXHQFHV RI QHZ ŕŽ&#x160;QDQFLDO ceeded â&#x201A;Ź4,000, with charges regulations. applied for a variety of reasons Charles Goodhart, Emeriincluding cleaning charges, lost tus Professor of Banking keys, missing bed linen, missing and Finance at the LSEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s towels, broken TV remotes and Financial Markets some general repair costs. Group, raised a numNUCO Travel stated that ber of interesting such charges are common points in his speech. among student groups, and the He began by explaining costs were taken from the group how homogeneity in the damage deposit. ŕŽ&#x160;QDQFLDO VHFWRU ZDV FRQ Photos of the damage and tributing to more risk. The the exact breakdown of the ever-increasing self-simiFKDUJHV DUH WR UHPDLQ D FRQŕŽ&#x160; larity and interconnecteddential matter between the resiQHVV RI LQGLYLGXDOV DQG ŕŽ&#x160; dence, NUCO and LSE students nancial actors was, he said, involved. augmenting systemic risk. No member of the LSE Ski The former Monetary Policy Trip committee was available Committee member was also to comment when contacted by critical of the recommendaThe Beaver. tions made by the Vickers Regardless of the damage Commission on Banking, caused, great fun was had on a panel set up by the Britthe Ski Trip, with second year ish government in 2010 to BSc History and Internation- consider structural reforms al Relations student, Dennis to the countryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s banking Mooney, stating, â&#x20AC;&#x153;it was a fan- system. Indeed, he argued tastic opportunity to meet peo- that ring-fencing investment SOH IURP GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQW FRXUVHV DQG banking operations from clubs. Conspicuous consump- those of retail banking was tion was the order of the week, actually likely to make banks and some of us also did some riskier. By taking away the great skiing.â&#x20AC;?

headed the league table, with Glasgow Caledonian University holding the top spot with 77 per cent of students eating portions of chocolate regularly. Self-confessed chocoholic, and second year BSc International Relations student, Arisa Manawapat, was one of the few students interviewed by The Beaver displaying visible signs of distress at LSEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s poor performance in the Chocolate League, stating, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t think anyone should underestimate the power of chocolate.â&#x20AC;? City University London made a reappearance in the Chocolate Eating League, mak-

stable deposit base of the retail banking side, he said, the reforms could make the investment banking departments more risky by raising their funding costs and increasing their reliance on less stable interbank lending markets. As the global Head of Credit Products Strategy at Citi, Matt King brought a GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQW SHUVSHFWLYH WR WKH debate. He mentioned how the credit markets he works in are now largely driven by expected changes in the regulatory framework, and also

ulations to stop crises, which in his opinion are unpreventable in a world of risk-taking and entrepreneurship. Indeed, he compared the 6000page long Basel III rules to â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;looking where the light isâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, while the greatest danger in WKHŕŽ&#x160;QDQFLDOV\VWHPLVRIWHQ â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;in the darkâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. Dr Danielsson was also sceptical about WKH EHQHŕŽ&#x160;WV RI LQWURGXFLQJ too much new regulation, which he claimed has often been more political than it has been based on empirical economic research. In his view, excessive regulation could create the dangerous perception of safety, even if these new rules in fact induced unintended consequences. A lively debate between those on the panel and members of the audience addressed topics ranging from â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;zombieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; banks to the role of monetary policy in the recent ŕŽ&#x160;QDQFLDO FULVLV 2QH SDUWLF b r o u g h t ularly interesting question up what he that was raised concerned saw as an impor- the concentration of the WDQW WUDGHRŕŽ&#x2030; EHWZHHQ HFR British banking system, and QRPLF JURZWK DQG ŕŽ&#x160;QDQFLDO whether or not such a makestability. The new regula- XS LQFUHDVHV ŕŽ&#x160;QDQFLDO ULVN tions being introduced, he Jon Danielssonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s response said, were likely to lead to was that the excessive conslower growth, something centration doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t necessarwhich â&#x20AC;&#x153;we all need to be ily lead to greater systemic more open aboutâ&#x20AC;?. risk; as important as the Last to speak was Dr Jon number of banks is their naDanielsson, co-director of ture and the extent to which the new SRC. He warned their actions are similar, he about having too much faith argued. LQWKHSRZHURIŕŽ&#x160;QDQFLDOUHJ

Globalist launches Susan Wiliams

The LSESU Global 21 Society, the studentâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;run internaWLRQDO DŕŽ&#x2030;DLUV PDJD]LQH â&#x20AC;ŤÚ?â&#x20AC;ŹWKH London Globalistâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; is set to re-launch this April. Set up in 2009 by a group of LSE students, the publication became one of the many chapters of the Global 21 Network. Every year, the magazine IRFXVHVRQDGLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQWWKHPH which writers discuss extensively in their articles. One of WKH EHQHŕŽ&#x160;WV RI WKH *OREDO network is the possibility of article exchanges with other chapters. The Self and the Other: Identity in Crisis is the title of the next edition, with the issue aiming to focus on interQDWLRQDODŕŽ&#x2030;DLUVLQSDUWLFXODU the search for belonging and identity, such as occurrence of The Arab Spring and independence protests. The London Globalist aims to give students an opportunity to experience investigate journalism and be published in a high quality magazine; while promoting a debate between students at the LSE. The LSESU Global21 will be launching its new website and The Self and the Other: Identity in Crisis online for students to read on 30 April at thelondonglobalist.org.


News

The Beaver | 19.03.2013

Rethinking drugs policy

Call for peer support

on Drugs on behalf of the 86 6HYHUDO /DWLQ $PHUL Last year US President Ba- can leaders, such as former rack Obama was put under President Vicente Fox of the limelight when Guate- 0H[LFRKDYHEHHQDGYRFDW mala brought the issue of ing a rethink in Drug Policy. Drug Policy reform during Castro also noted that it was the Americas Summit in not until former Guatemalan Cartagena, Colombia. Luis 3UHVLGHQW 2WWR 3HUH]0ROL Fernando Carrera Castro, na, that an incumbent state )RUHLJQ $ŕŽ&#x2030;DLUV 0LQLVWHU RI leader challenged US orthoGuatemala, spoke at the LSE doxy on Drug Policy by callODVW0RQGD\DWDQHYHQWHQ ing the War on Drugs a failtitled â&#x20AC;&#x153;Guatemala and the XUH(YHUVLQFH'UXJ3ROLF\

na, which according to Castro constitutes the greatest SDUWRIGUXJWUDŕŽ&#x152;  F Regarding international security, Castro made referHQFH VSHFLŕŽ&#x160;FDOO\ RQ *XDWH malaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s role as a temporary member of the UNâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Security &RXQFLO +H DJUHHG UHIRUP LV QHHGHG EXW GLG QRW DGYR FDWH DQ\ VSHFLŕŽ&#x160;F SURSRVDO According to Castro, Guatemalaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s position is based on pragmatism and common

reform has played a key part in Central American countries diplomatic agenda and has witnessed an increased awareness and support from other US regional allies such as Colombia. Castro noted that policy change will take time but breaking with orthodoxy on the issue is already a great DFKLHYHPHQW +H DOVR LQ GLFDWHG WKDW HYHQWV WDNLQJ place within the US such as the legalisation of cannabis for recreational use in ColoUDGR PLJKW EH LQGLFDWLYH RI a change in attitude towards the consumption of marijua-

sense, as the country lacks both military and economic power to be a major player in world politics. In Castroâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s YLHZWKHVWDWXVTXRRQYHWR power must remain but an expansion of the councilâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s permanent membership to include major emerging and current economic and military powers. â&#x20AC;&#x153;By including economic powers, the council might make a shift in how it builds peace from a military perVSHFWLYH WR D PRUH ZKROH VRPH YLHZâ&#x20AC;Ť& Ú&#x2022;â&#x20AC;ŹDVWUR VWDWHG concluding his talk.

DIEGO FERNANDEZ

Carlos Solis-Tejada

UN rethinking international security.â&#x20AC;? 7KH HYHQW KRVWHG E\ &$6$ DQG /6( ,GHDV JDYH academics, policy makers and the general public a glimpse on the take of countries such as Guatemala, ZKRKDYHOLWWOHVD\RUQRVD\ in the global decision making processes on issues that DŕŽ&#x2030;HFWWKHPGLUHFWO\ Arguably, Drug Policy reform is one of the most pressing issues for countries LQ 0HVRDPHULFD WKH &DULE bean and Andean Regions. )RUGHFDGHVWKH\KDYHEHHQ bearing the brunt of the War

5

Beaver News Team

LSE hosted a graduation ceremony this week to celebrate the work of thirteen Peer Supporters. The Peer Supporters were JLYHQ FHUWLŕŽ&#x160;FDWHV WR PDUN WKH occasion, as they approached the end of their second term working with LSE students. They were joined by Peter +RZOHWW WKH 'HDQ RI 8QGHU graduate Studies, and Rachael (OOLRWW +HDG RI 5HVLGHQWLDO Life, as well as Richard Perkins and Debra Ogden (Wardens at 3DVVŕŽ&#x160;HOG DQG %DQNVLGH  DQG 0RQLND 6PRODU IURP WKH /6( 6WXGHQW &RXQVHOOLQJ 6HUYLFH who has been managing the Scheme and running the fortQLJKWO\VXSHUYLVLRQPHHWLQJV This was the second group RI 3HHU 6XSSRUWHUV WR KDYH graduated at LSE, and senior members of the School wanted to acknowledge the hard work that this group of students had put into the scheme. Peer SupSRUWHUV KDYH UHDFKHG RXW WR KXQGUHGVRIGLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQWVWXGHQWV in the residences and across the campus. Richard Perkins thanked the Peer Supporters for their ZRUN LQ WKH UHVLGHQFHV â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x201D;â&#x20AC;Ź,â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹYH EHHQ OXFN\ HQRXJK WR KDYH D

fabulous group of Peer SupSRUWHUV 1RW RQO\ KDYH WKH\ been through a long and rigorous training, but they represent a generation that is comPLWWHG WR VKDULQJ DQG JLYLQJ WKHLUWLPHVHOŕŽ&#x2039;HVVO\WRRWKHUVâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2022;â&#x20AC;Ź Rachael Elliott spoke about WKH PDWHULDO GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQFH WKDW Peer Support was making to community life in the residences, and looked forward to an increase in the numbers of Peer Supporters at the School. $OUHDG\WKHUHKDYHEHHQPDQ\ students contacting the StuGHQW &RXQVHOOLQJ 6HUYLFH WR express an interest in the next training at the end of the Summer Term. 3HWHU+RZOHWWVDLGWKDW3HHU Support is an important initiaWLYH â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x201D;â&#x20AC;Ź,W RŕŽ&#x2030;HUV YLWDO VXSSRUW WR VWXGHQWV ZKR PD\ DUULYH DW XQLYHUVLW\ DQG KDYH QR RQH WR turn to; it is now a key part of a UDQJHRIGLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQWW\SHVRIKHOS DYDLODEOHWRQHZVWXGHQWVDQG ,â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹPGHOLJKWHGWRVHHLWŕŽ&#x2039;RXULVK ing within the School.â&#x20AC;? The Student Counselling 6HUYLFH ZRXOG OLNH WR KHDU IURPŕŽ&#x160;UVW\HDUXQGHUJUDGXDWHV who may be interested in becoming Peer Supporters. The closing date for applications is 23 April. See lse.ac.uk/counselling/peersupport

LSE improvisational theatre Rachel Williams

After months of rigorous training, the LSE Drama Societyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ,PSURY WURXSH WRRN WR WKH stage, presenting a glimpse of the two hours of madness they concoct on a weekly basis. Taking suggestions from an enthusiastic audience, â&#x20AC;&#x153;The +D+D ,QFLGHQWâ&#x20AC;Ť Ú&#x2022;â&#x20AC;ŹZDV D VH ries of games (akin to â&#x20AC;&#x153;Whose Line is it Anyway?â&#x20AC;?) with each PHPEHU RI WKH JURXS RŕŽ&#x2030;HULQJ their wittiest remarks and enDFWLQJLPDJLQDWLYHDQGKXPRU ous scenes. ,PSURYLVDWLRQDO WKHDWUH LV a skill, a process which allows DFWRUVWRH[SORUHGLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQWIDF ets of life. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not just about making a gag but turning imagination into reality. WorkVKRSV KDYH EHHQ UXQ RQ FDP pus for a number of years and most recently, it has been AnJHOLQD &DVWHOOLQL 6WHYH %RQG DQG 5RELQ :LMQKROG ZKR KDYH

created a comfortable atmosphere in which students can explore the medium. â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x201D;â&#x20AC;Ź, ZDV DEVROXWHO\ WHUULŕŽ&#x160;HG ZKHQ,ZHQWWRWKHŕŽ&#x160;UVWLPSURY ZRUNVKRSEXWQRZ,â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹPLQORYH

Santamaria. The troupe has bonded throughout the year to create DSRRORILQQRYDWLYHLGHDV â&#x20AC;&#x153;The most important thing for a show is for members to

with it. I had a blast working ZLWKHYHU\RQHWRPDNHVFHQHV as entertaining as possible and was glad to see our hard work come into fruition at our show.â&#x20AC;? said performer Sheena

get to know each other well and comfortable when performing together.â&#x20AC;? says troupe leader Angelina Castellini, â&#x20AC;&#x153;The group this year was fantastic to work with. An ex-

WUHPHO\FUHDWLYHEXQFKRISHR ple.â&#x20AC;? 0DQ\ RI WKH SHUIRUPHUV KDYH IRXQG WKDW LPSURYLVD WLRQ KDV KHOSHG WKHP WR ŕŽ&#x160;QG JUHDWHU FRQŕŽ&#x160;GHQFH LQ WKHP VHOYHV $V DFWRU -RVK (OOPDQ described, â&#x20AC;&#x153;the best part of LPSURYLVEHLQJVXUURXQGHGE\ other people who are as insane and immature as you. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s like EHLQJDJRULOODOLYLQJLQWKHKX man world, and all the humans think youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re weird. And then one day you walk into a room DQG HYHU\RQHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV D JRULOOD DQG HYHU\RQH WKLQNV LWV QRUPDO And then the gorillas get on stage and all the people who thought you were weird are now clapping. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s like thatâ&#x20AC;?. Starting from humble beginnings only a few years DJR WKH /6( ,PSURY JURXS has gained momentum as PRUH DQG PRUH KDYH WDNHQ WR the stage, with help from the LSESU Drama Society. Who

created the infamous Pacman sketch in the LSE Library? 7KHVHJX\V7KH\KDYHPDQ\D WULFNXSWKHLUVOHHYHV 1RW RQO\ KDV /6( ,PSURY LPSURYHGWKHLUVWDWXVRQFDP SXVEXW/6(DOXPQLVWDŕŽ&#x2030;DQG VWXGHQWV KDYH DOVR FUHDWHG 7KH$JHQW,PSURYRFDWHXUVDQ LPSURY PHGOH\ WDNLQJ /RQGRQ by storm, claiming: â&#x20AC;&#x153;We donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t need no preparationâ&#x20AC;?. So when the cheers from WKH HQFRUH RI â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x201D;â&#x20AC;Ź7KH +D+D ,Q cidentâ&#x20AC;? faded and the lights went up, the smiling faces of the audience illustrated clearly the anticipation of more inJHQLRXVLPSURYLVDWLRQWRFRPH QH[W \HDU  $V PDHVWUR 6WHYH Bond proudly proclaimed: â&#x20AC;&#x153;the audience members were pissLQJ WKHPVHOYHV ODXJKLQJ DQG then I remembered that most of the people on stage hadnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t GRQH DQ\ LPSURY DW DOO EHIRUH VWDUW RI 0LFKDHOPDV WHUP , VXGGHQO\IHOWYHU\SURXGâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2022;â&#x20AC;Ź


6

News

19.03.2013

| The Beaver

Equal access to education for asylum seekers cussion was part of STARâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Campaign for Equal Access to Higher Education at LSE Current UK and university LQWKHLUHŕŽ&#x2030;RUWVWRDGGUHVVâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x201D;â&#x20AC;ŹWKH policy dictates that students discrepancies and ambiguities who are asylum seekers and in UK higher education policy WKRVH ZKR KDYH ŕŽ&#x2039;HG WKHLU for individuals in the UK seekhome countries from war and ing protection from persecupersecution are regarded as WLRQDQGFRQŕŽ&#x2039;LFWâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2022;â&#x20AC;Ź international students, and The panellists at the event thus expected to pay annual included, Matt Tennant, a tuitions of up to ÂŁ29,200. This committee member of the Naexpectation greatly contrasts tional Union of Students Sowith the reality that the asy- ciety and Citizenship Zone; a lum seekers are not legally visiting Fellow at LSE Gender permitted to work in the UK Institute and former employee while their application is be- of the Council for Assisting ing processed, and are given Refugee Academics, Latefa only ÂŁ36 a week, which is one Guemar; Oonagh Skrine from third less than the average the Refugee Support Network British citizen on the dole. and Student Action for RefuThis was the issue that the gees executive Emma WilLSESU Student Action for Ref- liams. ugees (STAR) held a panel to Paul Sathianesan a paneldiscuss in their event entitled list from the Refugee and Laâ&#x20AC;&#x153;Exploring Access to Higher bour Councillor for Newham Education for Asylum Seek- who was once a refugee himers and Refugees in the UK,â&#x20AC;? self, stressed that asylum on Thursday evening. The dis- seekers and refugees were Sophie Donszelmann, 6WDૼ5HSRUWHU

â&#x20AC;&#x153;not a threat but an asset to their receiving country.â&#x20AC;? The speakers stressed the numerous barriers facing refugees in their access to higher education as well as various measures such as the Access 2ŕŽ&#x2030;HU $JUHHPHQW $UWLFOH  and the kitemark measures that STAR and other student organizations can use to lobby their universities into providing a more fair treatment of asylum seekers. Jack Tindale, the SU Community and Welfare Officer and another speaker at the event, contrasted the current policies with the â&#x20AC;&#x153;London Recruitsâ&#x20AC;? movement in the 1970s when British students, with many from the LSE, went to South Africa to protest the Apartheid regime. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a shame that we have gone from having a very forward thinking, progressive view, to now having to go back to a domestic focus as we are no

longer seen as an open, just society.â&#x20AC;? STAR members Meg Moran, a third year Anthropology student and Aoife Hinds, a third year International Relations student, expressed their concern that while LSE may be considered an advanced institution in many respects, they lag behind in regards to their treatment of students with discretionary statuses. Many British universities have already implemented the policy of granting such students a home fee status, and the LSE administrationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s policy on refugee students is a â&#x20AC;&#x153;grey area.â&#x20AC;? Currently, there are no scholarships available for refugees and these students are ineligible to apply for any of the general scholarships. Priya Changela, a MSc International Development student and LSESU STAR President, encouraged the student body by saying that â&#x20AC;&#x153;with LSE

often celebrating its diversity, and with an acclaimed international history, our student body really does have the potential to generate greater clarity to university policy and invoke change.â&#x20AC;? One of the attendees, Yating Wang, an MSc Culture and Society student, described her involvement with the STAR society and their outreach programs as an â&#x20AC;&#x153;indescribable experience.â&#x20AC;? Wang is one of the many STAR members who visit the Notre Dame Refugee Centre on a rotating basis to provide refugees with advice for their resumes and job interviews. The STAR Society would like to invite anyone who also believes that the LSE should allow equal access to education to asylum seekers to sign their petition titled â&#x20AC;&#x153;LSE Equal Accessâ&#x20AC;? at ipetitions. com.

Panel discussion on the two-state solution Abir Qazilbash

On the 12th March, LSESU Think Tank, Israel, and Palestine Societies held a collaborated discussion on the viability of a Two State Solution in the Middle East. The discussion was chaired by LSE Professor Mary Kaldor from the Department of International Development. The primary speakers, representing an Israeli and Palestinian perspective respectively, were Tom Wilson and Mujahid Dattani. Wilson, Research Director at the Institute for Middle Eastern Studies. is currently completing doctoral studies LQ WKH $UDE,VUDHOL FRQŕŽ&#x2039;LFW DW University College London. Dattani is a Barrister specializing in International Humanitarian Law, with a specialism in Populist Legal Movements in Apartheid South Africa and the Occupied Palestinian Territories. The opening question concerned Israel and Palestineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;respective rights to self-determinationâ&#x20AC;?. Both speakers agreed on their respective sidesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; right to self-determination, given both Israeli and Palestinian citizensâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; rights to assert their sovereignty. Mujahid emphasized the need to adhere to an international legal framework, as well as highlighting that Palestinian peoplesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; own opinion ought to be at the essence of determining whether the future of their self-determination assertion would materialize in the form of advocating a one, or twostate solution or otherwise. Tom portrayed the Israeli claim to self-determination, through emphasizing the repercussions of â&#x20AC;&#x153;unsuccessful

previous attempts â&#x20AC;&#x153; of Jewish assimilation in Europe during the period of National Socialism in Germany, as well as in Russia. This added potency to the case for Israeli self-determination for statehood. Tom added that the Israeli government believed the establishment of a Palestinian state was in itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s own best interest. A particularly interesting moment was when the topic veered to the question of legality of Israeli settlements and whether these hindered a viable peace. Tom posited his belief that settlements were â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x201D;â&#x20AC;ŹQRW VSHFLŕŽ&#x160;FDOO\ GHHPHG LOOHgalâ&#x20AC;? under international law with reference to the 2011 UN Security Council Resolution, and hence the prohibition of establishing settlements in occupied territory â&#x20AC;&#x153;cannot described as legally binding under International Lawâ&#x20AC;?. Mujahid repudiated Tomâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s suggestion by citing the United Nations Security Council and General Assembly, the International Committee of the Red Cross, and the International Court of Justice as international bodies that had all unanimously affirmed the illegality of Israeli settlements. Mujahid quoted from Resolution 446 that the Security Council determined that "the policy and practices of Israel in establishing settlements in the Palestinian and other Arab territories occupied since 1967 have no legal validityâ&#x20AC;? and furthermore â&#x20AC;&#x153;constitute a serious obstruction to achieving a comprehensive, just and lasting peace in the Middle East". Tom postulated that most settlements were situated in proximity of the Green Line, and did not prevent the ex-

istence of a Palestinian state. Drawing a comparison with the Arab minority population in Israel, he stated that a Jewish Settler demographic could still be allowed to exist as a minority in a Palestinian state. Tom also suggested that the 4th Geneva Convention to which Israel is legally bound, which states that â&#x20AC;&#x153;an occupier may not deport or transfer parts of its own civilian population into occupied territoryâ&#x20AC;?, was not applicable to the issue of Israeli settlements. He mentioned that historically, Palestine had been viewed as part of a Greater Syria, and thus international conventions relating to occupied land do not apply to the Palestinian territories, because they were not necessarily under the legitimate sovereignty of any state LQWKHŕŽ&#x160;UVWSODFH,QUHVSRQVH Mujahid countered this, referring a statement about the 4th Geneva Convention which does indeed apply to the Occupied Palestinian Territories including Jerusalem. One point was raised from an audience member on Israelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;restrictive prohibitions on Palestinian development, even in day-to-day situations such as â&#x20AC;&#x153;issues as simple as window reparations in Area B (semi-autonomous) localities requiring permission from ,VUDHOL DXWKRULWLHVâ&#x20AC;Ť  Ú&#x2022;â&#x20AC;Ź6DŕŽ&#x160;D an LSE MSc student, supplemented that settlers have superior rights in the occupied territories. Adding to this, Maha Batran, a Palestinian MSc student at LSE, shared her personal experience of not being able to obtain legal permission to marry her Arab,VUDHOLŕŽ&#x160;DQFÂŤ Ishmael, a PhD student from SOAS, raised the topical

issue of the recent introduction of separate bus lines, and the similarities this had with Apartheid and the American Civil Rights Movement. Tom replied that Israel could not be compared to Apartheid South Africa, stating existence of political and social representation for the Arab minority in Israel. Mujahid gave the example of the Arab minority being subject to arbitrary detention. He also cited the deeming of torture as a crime against humanity in international law, both of which Israel was not a state party to. Tom later commented that the treatment of Palestinian refugees in neighbouring Syria and Jordan was far worse than Israelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s treatment of Israeli-Arabs and Palestinians. In response, Mujahid emphasized the assertion that a comparison of Israelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s acts to those of states widely accepted to be non-democratic is not plausible within the same framework. Katja Knoechelmann, copresident of LSESU Israel Society, raised concerns that Mujahidâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s reference to states such as Canada as examples of successful multinational states were largely European paradigms. She suggested that Israelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s precarious geopolitical location, and its hisWRU\ RI FRQŕŽ&#x2039;LFW ZLWK LWV $UDE neighbours, would have implications on whether a one state solution could work. Mujahid responded by giving the nonWestern example of India as a state with 23 distinct minority groups, and a system of constitution drafting that reserved seats to enable minority representation. Another concern raised by an audience member, was the

viability of a two-state solution including Hamas. Mujahid subsequently stated that the documentary record, from International and even Israeli newspapers such as Haâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;aretz and the relatively more rightwing Jerusalem Post, illustrated Hamasâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; willingness to negotiate a two-state solution. Overall, the event was received very positively by attendees. and the involved societies alike. Andrew Phua (MSc in Global Politics) commented that it â&#x20AC;&#x153;did shed new light on the way I view the FRQŕŽ&#x2039;LFWGXHWRWKHPDQ\SHUsonal viewpoints added by the audience membersâ&#x20AC;?. Anisa Ahmed, President of LSESU Palestine Society, commented â&#x20AC;&#x153;what made the event hugely successful was the fact that it was moderated by the Think Tank Society. This avoided any hostilities that could have otherwise occurred, and enabled an engagement in dialogue.â&#x20AC;? Carl Loof, Executive Officer of Israeli Society, felt â&#x20AC;&#x153;it was a great success...It was awesome to hear that both speakers believed in the rights of the two peoples over the posturing of political entities, and equally importantly that minority rights would be fundamental to any stateâ&#x20AC;?. Echoing the attendees and organisersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; sentiments, having both an Israeli and Palestinian perspective portrayed on the same issues, certainly made the event a good introduction to people who sought to objectively develop their knowledge about the posited two-state solution and IsraeOL3DOHVWLQLDQ FRQŕŽ&#x2039;LFW PRUH broadly; or indeed as a means of engaging people who were not partial to either side.


News

The Beaver | 19.03.2013

7

Hellenic Forum: Grexiting the Crisis Inspired by the fact that Greece is at the heart of the European Economic Crisis, the Hellenic Society of LSE successfully organized a series of events with the title â&#x20AC;&#x153;Grexiting the Crisisâ&#x20AC;?, the ŕŽ&#x160;UVW +HOOHQLF )RUXP ORRNing at Greeceâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s future in Europe. The event was divided in three main parts: Social Crisis, Economic Crisis and Business Crisis, hosting LPSRUWDQW VSHDNHUV ZLWK NQRZOHGJH LQ WKRVH WKUHH categories respectively. The event began on Monday with a discussion focusing on overcoming the social crisis in Greece. Among others, the mayor of Athens, Mr. George Kaminis (and former Ombudsman for Human Rights 1998-2003 and *UHHN 2PEGXVPDQ  2010) provided an insightful view of the social crisis in Greece. He underlined that in a worldwide economy of interdependence, it is irraWLRQDO IRU ZHDN FRXQWULHV facing the explosions of ideas, beliefs, ideologies and interests to be blamed for a whole economic crisis. He underlined that those stereotypes can only increase the embellishment of popuOLVW ZD\V RI WKLQNLQJ DQG PDNHXQGHPRFUDWLFFKRLFHV more attractive. The Mayor of Athens also pointed DW WKH HŕŽ&#x2030;HFW RI WKH DXVWHULW\ PHDVXUHV RQ *UHHN FLWLzens, having â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;reached their limitâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and thus portraying a rising danger of a social explosion, if the reforms, albeit necessary, continue to toughen. Thus, this presents Athens with a critical dilemma: will the net of social security be able to care

for the homeless, drug addicts, ex-convicts and illegal immigrants, as well as the unemployed, the poor and the elderly with low pensions? This reality is nothing but â&#x20AC;&#x153;everyday life for usâ&#x20AC;?, the Mayor pointed out. Ending in a more encouraging note, he promised for the results of his new development scheme to show soon, since he confessed that this constitutes a personal bet with himself. The most crowded of the events was the Economics section which saw the forPHU 0LQLVWHU RI )LQDQFH LQ Greece, Dr. ChristodoulaNLV XQGHUOLQH ERWK WKH LQcreasing debt and the rising unemployment as obstacles for exiting the economic crisis. Repossessing competitiveness is thus not only relevant to wages but also new technologies, innovation and production capabilities. The taxation policy has failed time and again; taxes rise and income decreases, following an unequal line, which creates a subsequent increase of the social crisis. However, the former Minister was not entirely pessimistic. As for the steps for exiting the crisis, he suggested recapitalizaWLRQRIEDQNVWKURXJK()6) DQG QRW WKURXJK WKH *UHHN Debt; he also elaborated on WUXVW WKURXJK IUHVK ŕŽ&#x160;VFDO rules, and the creation of a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;new ground of developmentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; using between others the European Investments %DQN â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x201D;â&#x20AC;Ź0RUH FKDQJHV OHVV austerityâ&#x20AC;? was the overall conclusion of the former Ministerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s speech. There was interest in the presentation of Mr. Man-

dravelisâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, columnist in the newspaper â&#x20AC;&#x153;Kathimeriniâ&#x20AC;? SRSXODU*UHHNQHZVSDSHU  view of the economic crisis. He emphasized the need to GLVHQJDJH WKH *UHHN HFRQomy and society from the state. What Greece needs at the moment is thus not a state-based vision of the future, but a combination of private ones. He suggested WKDW WKH PDMRU PLVWDNH RI WKH ,0) DQG WKH (8 ZDV their failure to realize how deep in the economy the state had penetrated. As a result, even for politicians reforms are harder than the austerity policy. In response to this, Dr. Elias Papaioannou, Research Affiliate in the Centre of Economic Policy Research, reached a conclusion, which had been brought up repetitively in the Social part of the event on Monday. The structural problems of the state and the threat of a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;social explosionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; are the main obstacles preventing new reforms, even if all sides were in favour. The â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;euphoriaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; period in Greece, pre-crisis, was based on nothing but populist policies. Thus, now any attempts for reforms would have to face the slow rhythm and fragmented VW\OH WKH ZHDNQHVV RI WKH state to impose them, and WKH ODFN RI WKHLU OHJDOL]DWLRQLQWKHH\HVRIWKH*UHHN citizens that have learnt to disrespect, to fear, to be xenophobic among others, to always have doubts. The only solution could be volunteering, donations and a more energetic involvement in the commons. 7KH HYHQW HQGHG RQ )ULday, revolving around the business crisis and ways

˾˜˽˭˚˾˴˚˜˨˴ˡ˸ˏˡ

Martha Petrocheilos

WR RYHUFRPH LW 6SHDNHUV ranging from Mr. Dragazis, 9LFH&KDLUPDQRIWKH*UHHN Shipping Corporation London Committee, to Mr. Syngros, Executive Chairman RI,QYHVWLQ*UHHFHRŕŽ&#x2030;HUHG useful advice aimed mainly at the youngest generation for exiting the crisis. The main conclusion was that

the whole administration model has to change, not merely separate business EUDQFKHV 3RLQWLQJ EDFN WR an upcoming theme of the ZKROH +HOOHQLF )RUXP WKH establishment of a climate of trust was also stressed, which would then lead to a new era of investment in Greece.

Peter Hall on the Euro-crisis LQJ RQ GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQFHV LQ WKH economic structures of The Government Depart- member states to analyse ment was privileged to wel- its root causes and consecome Peter Hall to the LSE quences. European Monon Thursday to give a lec- HWDU\ 8QLRQ KH VDLG ZDV ture on the Economics and primarily introduced for poPolitics of the Euro Crisis. litical reasons of continenProfessor Hall is a widely- tal integration; whilst the UHQRZQHGOHDGHULQWKHŕŽ&#x160;HOG (08â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVSUHGHFHVVRUWKH(Xof political economy. After a ropean Monetary System, spell as a visiting scholar may have been an economic at the LSE in the 1980s, equilibrium, it was not a pohe has gone on to become litical equilibrium, accord.UXSS )RXQGDWLRQ 3URIHV- ing to Professor Hall. One consequence of sor of European Studies at Harvard, specialising in Eu- this political basis for the currency area is that naropean political economy. Professor Hallâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lecture tions within it have varyWRRN D 9DULHWLHV RI &DSLWDO- ing economic structures ism perspective on the cri- and varieties of capitalism. sis in the Eurozone, draw- Whilst northern European

Matt Pennill

FRXQWULHV OLNH *HUPDQ\ DUH FRQŕŽ&#x160;JXUHG IRU H[SRUW led growth and have institutional provisions for VNLOOV LQYHVWPHQW VWDWHV LQ WKH VRXWK OLNH 6SDLQ KDYH traditionally been driven by domestic demand and DUH FKDUDFWHUL]HG E\ ŕŽ&#x160;Vsiparous trade union movePHQWV )RU +DOO WKHVH LQstitutional asymmetries provide a more accurate analysis of the crisisâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; roots than the typical explanation that focuses on southern FRXQWULHVâ&#x20AC;Ť Ú&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹŕŽ&#x160;VFDO IHFNOHVVness. The professor also criticized the measures that have thus far been aimed at solving the regionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s prob-

lems. Structural reform and EDODQFHG EXGJHWV YLD D ŕŽ&#x160;Vcal compact are not shortto-medium-term strategies to deal with the crisis, he argued, and the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;one size ŕŽ&#x160;WV DOOâ&#x20AC;Ť Ú&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹDSSURDFK WKDW LV currently being adopted is inappropriate. Though he admitted his scepticism about the ability of leaders to solve the crisis, Professor Hall concluded by expressing his overall optimism that the existential problems facing the euro area could and would be overcome eventually. In his opinion, academics at the LSE have played and continue to play an essential role in the de-

EDWH RYHU WKH EHQHŕŽ&#x160;WV DQG FRVWVRIWKHDFWLRQWDNHQWR resolve the regionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s problems. 'DQLHO 6LSSHO D ŕŽ&#x160;UVW year Politics and Philosophy student, described the lecture as eye-opening: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Peter +DOOWRRNDQLQQRYDWLYHDQG unconventional approach to analysing the crisis in the Eurozone. However, as , IHHO 3URIHVVRU +DOO NQRZV himself, his Varieties of Capitalism approach has to EH PRGLŕŽ&#x160;HG LQ WKH IDFH RI changing political economies across Europe. I will be interested to see whether his cautious optimism for the future of the region proves to be accurate.â&#x20AC;?


Comment

8

Comment

19.03.2013

| The Beaver

The end of student apathy

Comment Leader: Rosie Coleman on the SU electionsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; positive impact on our democracy Last weekâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Student Union elections signify a turning point in LSE student engagement. With a full UGM, student-focused manifestos, and record turnouts in elections, the days of LSE apathy are over. Thursday February 28th held host to a weekly UGM ZLWK D GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQFH 8QOLNH other Thursday lunchtimes where the Old Theatre is lucky to have a handful of guests, the week before last saw new highs. The LSESU KXVWLQJVVLJQLŕŽ&#x160;HGWKHEHJLQning of election week. Candidates could not announce their candidacy before this point, although campus had been already buzzing with various candidate rumours. Hustings were full of people engaging with politics, asking important questions and challenging candidatesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; policy proposals. Perhaps increased engagement was because everyone already knew Jay Stoll, Rosina St James or Jason Wong, but I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t think this fully explains the hype. With over 60 people nominated for the roles, and more than twenty for the full-time positions alone, almost everyone on campus would have known someone running for a position. It was set to be an interesting week. My race, for Education Officer, was (as many people have duly noted) an â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;interestingâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; one. There were twice as many candidates as last year. This allowed the race to be not one of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;good vs. badâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; or â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;left vs. rightâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, but one of tangible policies. This was exactly what I had hoped for. I wanted to run an â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;apoliticalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; campaign. Not that I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t believe politics to be important to the SU. I strongly support Jayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s vision of a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;politicalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; union. But I think there is a time and a place for political action and most of the time the role of the SU should be for change within LSE, not outside of it, to change the day-to-day lives of LSE students. So number of candidates

was of course important. 7KLV DŕŽ&#x2030;HFWHG DOO IXOOWLPH positions: six running for Gen Sec, six for Education, four for Community and Welfare and three for Activities and Development. It also extended to the parttime positions. Womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Officer was a very close race between three fantastic candidates. Environment and Ethics also attracted amazing talent. Democracy is reliant on competition, variation and passion. All the candidates running

endorsements, something that reinforced the democratic nature of the elections. Not all societies endorsed the same candidate and the endorsements were entirely fair. Emir Nader, for example, thoroughly deserved his endorsement from the Feminist Society after three loyal years in the society and on the committee. Multiple endorsements enabled candidates to tap into multiple streams of students and engage even more individuals on their

the number or nature of the candidates but the ferocity of the campaigning by all involved. This made it almost impossible for the elections to go unnoticed by the students. When the students were hounded to new levels, it is no wonder that 2999 votes were cast this year, 1000 more than in 2012. Students couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get away from elections like they potentially could have done in the past. This was of course facilitated by the number of candidates

wanted to win, to change LSE for the students and not for themselves. Yet more important perhaps was the nature of the candidates running. In all races there was a mixed bag of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;BNOCsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and relative unknowns and while all candidates played to their strengths, utilising networks within LSE in which they had a foothold, almost all of the candidates for Education Officer ran races based on their policies and not on the power of their name. This policy-led approach gained every candidate in my category a spattering of

policy proposals. It was also fantastic to see so many postgraduate students running in my race. Tina Salih and Ross Speer mobilized large numbers of postgrads in the voting processes. For the LSESU to purport to be democratic, postgraduates must use their vote and put their issues on the agenda. I found many interested postgraduate students during my campaigning, and to a large extent I thank Tina and Ross for this. What makes me think that the SU has turned a corner in political engagement, however, is not just

but also by the size of their campaign teams and the effort candidates had to exert to outsmart the opposition. The strict rules on campaigning also forced candidates to be more creative with their tactics. Gone were the days of just hanging a banner outside the 7XQV DQG KDQGLQJ RXW ŕŽ&#x2039;Lers to passers-by. Stunts, photos, music, and creative-themed campaigns engulfed Houghton Street, outside the library and even the bridges overhanging campus. The victorious Sabbatical officers will almost certainly be remembered for their slogans as much

LSESU

as their faces: â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Community Spirit, Anneessa will do itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Stall, Vote Stollâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Make LSE Rosierâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and Hannah Richmondâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tube-line theme. These posters appeared across campus, from toilets to Garrick tables to hallsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; cafeterias to lifts. And it worked; studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; right to vote was forced upon the student body to a whole new level, echoed by the voting turnout statistics. The number, nature and calibre of the candidates involved this year was important in making the elections democratic from the outset. Society endorsements were a badge of honour in their own right and not a matter of trivia or all assigned to the same candidate as has occurred in the past. The subsequent competitive nature of campaigning led to innovation, as well DV ORQJHU GD\V RI ŕŽ&#x2039;\HULQJ and shouting on Houghton Street, which also enhanced democracy. For these reasons, elecWLRQZHHNVLJQLŕŽ&#x160;HGDQHZO\ engaged student body and a more democratic LSE Studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Union. But I believe it doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t end here. All four of the victorious Sabbatical Officers, myself included, campaigned on policies of transparency and engagement. We all want to be more visible when we take office in July and to end the days where only twenty per cent of the student body can identify a Sabb. Maintaining the momentum and interest of the students from this election week should EH RXU ŕŽ&#x160;UVW DQG PRVW FRQstant, mission during our year in the Studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Union, and should create a legacy that will extend long after ZH KDYH IXOŕŽ&#x160;OOHG RXU GXties. It has been a pleasure and an honour campaigning amongst such talented and dedicated individuals and for the elections to have been so well received is amazing. I cannot wait to continue to engage the student body with my fellow Sabbatical Officers, as we have already started to do.


Comment

The Beaver | 19.03.2013

9

THE BIG DEBATE Where next for the British economy? Mohamed Harrath argues that the government must change course away from austerity Moodyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s decision last month to downgrade the UKâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s credit rating for the ŕŽ&#x160;UVWWLPHVLQFHZDVWKHŕŽ&#x160;QDOPHW ric by which Osbornomics has proven a failed policy on every front. The growing opposition to austerity amongst economists, commentators and more notably, in business, shows that austerity is disastrous for everyone but those who would be so deceptive as to impose cuts as a means of delivering a small state. At the last count, some of the most vocal opposition to austerity included Jim Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Neill of Goldman Sachs Asset Management, the IMF, and now it seems Moodyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s; institutions not exactly known to be EDVWLRQV RI OHIWZLQJ HFRQRPLFV 'HŕŽ&#x160; cit hawks are fast losing the argument and if there is to be any hope of a recovery then the government must change course. Britain has been held to ransom by a party which prioritises SRRUO\ WLPHG GHŕŽ&#x160;FLWUHGXFWLRQ RYHU growth and jobs. Labour should capture this mood of growing disillusionment and advocate a real alternative which puts people back to work and delivers the recovery we so desperately need. The idea of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;expansionary austerityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; might be an interesting topic for an undergraduate macroeconomics class (which I have the joy of sitting through every Monday), but we are (un)fortunate enough to have lived through the results of Boy Georgeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s policies. The UK has faced a double-dip recession VLQFH  :KLOVW ZH KDG JURZWK LQ WKHWKLUGTXDUWHURI ERRVWHGE\ the London Olympics) the last three PRQWKV RI  ZKHUH WKH HFRQRP\ FRQWUDFWHG E\  SHU FHQW NLOOHG RŕŽ&#x2030; any hope of a real recovery and demonstrated that depression economics is here to stay. The UK economy is stagnating and austerity isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t helping. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not a huge fan of relying on moral arguments to win debates on economics, but I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t help it in this case. Advocates of government spending werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just right in dismissing DXVWHULW\DVDSROLF\WKDWZRXOGNLOORŕŽ&#x2030; any potential growth; they held the moral high ground in pushing for policies which put jobs and employment, things that minimise the human cost RIUHFHVVLRQDERYHREVHVVLYHGHŕŽ&#x160;FLW reduction. The case for government spendLQJVWDUWVZLWKWKHLQHŕŽ&#x2030;HFWLYHQHVV of monetary policy in getting us out of depression. Lowering interest rates usually induces enough borrowing and spending to increase consumption and spending to boost output. Yet the Bank of Englandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s record low interest rates have failed to deliver an HŕŽ&#x2030;HFWLYH UHFRYHU\ 7KDW leaves us with one other key lever which hasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t \HWEHHQSXOOHG$ŕŽ&#x160;V FDO SROLF\ GHŕŽ&#x160;QHG E\ stimulus and government spending ZRXOG RŕŽ&#x2030;VHW WKH RQ going deleveraging in the private sector and would promote

growth and jobs. This is basic Keynesian economics, but it seems the government canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t bring itself to adopt the only policy that can bring us out of depresVLRQ:HPDQDJHGWRHVFDSHWKHSHULOV of the Great Depression by de facto stimulus in the military spending that ZDV QHFHVVDU\ IRU :RUOG :DU ,, :H would do well as a country to implePHQW ŕŽ&#x160;VFDO VWLPXOXV WKDW ZRXOG VHH D return to growth and prosperity. Not spending isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t really a viable option. The damage and immense human cost of austerity isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t limited to FUXGH ŕŽ&#x160;JXUHV RQ *'3 DQG XQHPSOR\ ment. The impact of Osborneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s disastrous economic policy impacts our poliWLFVDOVR:HNQRZIURPKLVWRU\WKDWWKH rise of the far-right is often facilitated by economic depression. This episode RI HFRQRPLF GHFOLQH LV QR GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQW Right-wing populist parties are on the rise across Europe: in France, Finland, $XVWULD +XQJDU\ DQG *UHHFH :KLOVW the rise of fascism in the UK has been less severe than on the continent, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d be fools to become complacent while Osborne is still at the Treasury. Labour should be the party that promotes the interests of working people. That means advocating for a stimulus and demonstrating that we as a party would adopt policies which put people back to work. Credibility on the economy has so far EHHQ GHŕŽ&#x160;QHG E\ ŕŽ&#x160;VFDO FRQ servatism, accepting that as a given harms people and Labour must do all it can to win this most crucial of debates. Only then will ZH IXOŕŽ&#x160;O RXU UH sponsibility as HM Opposition and only then can we be the party we are meant to be. TO AL

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Matt Pennill insists that the government must cut spending and taxes to promote growth â&#x20AC;&#x153;I used to think if there was reincarnation, I wanted to come back as the president or the pope or a .400 baseball hitter. But now I want to come back as the bond market. You can intimidate everybody.â&#x20AC;? James Carvilleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s famous phrase may now be resonating with George Osborne. Since the election, the Chancellor has gambled his economic legitimacy on the hope that the UK will hang onto its AAA credit rating. Its loss is unlikely to cause WKH JRYHUQPHQW DGGLWLRQDO ŕŽ&#x160;VFDO SURE OHPVEXWLWKDVFRVWWKH7UHDVXU\VLJQLŕŽ&#x160; cant political capital. Yet it doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to be this way. The Chancellor should embrace proper austerity to promote economic growth and ensure intergenerational equity. The downgrade by Moodyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, one of the three major ratings agencies, was widely anticipated. Indeed, the outlook is grim if one looks at the key macroeconomic DQGŕŽ&#x160;VFDOLQGLFDWRUVIRUWKH8.*URZWK LQZDVHVVHQWLDOO\QRQH[LVWHQWDQG LQŕŽ&#x2039;DWLRQLVOLNHO\WRUHPDLQDERYHWZRSHU cent through the medium term. Unemployment provides the only bright spot in this picture, though falling joblessness as a result of lower labour productivity is hardly ideal. Debt as a percentage RI*'3KDVEHHQULVLQJVLQFHDQG the present government has done little WRVWHPWKLVWLGHZLWKWKHŕŽ&#x160;JXUHLQFUHDV ing by over seventeen percentage points VLQFH  6LQFH WKH ODVW HOHFWLRQ DQG the promise that austerity was needed WRVHFXUH%ULWDLQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVŕŽ&#x160;QDQFLDOIXWXUHQRPL nal government spending has actually risen. This is not to say that there havenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t been departmental cuts â&#x20AC;&#x201C; the problem is that cuts in one part of :KLWHKDOO KDYH EHHQ PRUH WKDQ counterbalanced by rises in spending in other departments. Moreover, the lionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s share of the cuts that actually have taken place have fallen on capital spending, which is the one sector of government expenditure that might actually promote long-term growth, whilst current spending has been allowed to continue to spiral out of control. On UHŕŽ&#x2039;HFWLRQDUDWLQJVGRZQJUDGHZDV more a question of when, rather than if. The major damage from this news has and will fall on the Chancellor. Through all the difficulties that he has faced in his

role thus far, his one saving grace has been the credit rating agenciesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; supposed approval of his economic plan, as demonstrated by their AAA â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;rubber-stampingâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. The Chancellor has gambled so much political capital on this one measure of economic legitimacy that its loss represents an almighty own-goal. Luckily for Mr Osborne, the downgrade is likely to have little impact in the bond markets. Gilt yields will probably continue their trickle upwards (the past weekâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s events in Italy have put a temporary halt to this longterm move) but the Bank of England, as GHPRQVWUDWHG WKURXJK WKH 03&â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV ODWHVW minutes, is likely to step in to support gilt prices in any case. Even in an extremely open economy like Britainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, an inevitable consequence RI H[FHVVLYH ŕŽ&#x160;VFDO SURŕŽ&#x2039;LJDF\ LV SULYDWH sector crowding-out. Admittedly, this might be seen as less of a problem in the present context, with the Bank of England propping-up demand for gilts. However, with the central bank already holding one-third of the gilts in circulation, one has to ask how much longer this can go on for. Sooner or later, when credit demand rebounds and banks recommence imprudent lending, a sustained period RIKLJKLQŕŽ&#x2039;DWLRQLVWKHLQHYLWDEOHXSVKRW The only possible way of avoiding this, a swift and thorough shrinking of the Bank of Englandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s balance sheet, would cause an almighty crowding-out of private borrowers, as buyers are found for at least e ELOOLRQ RI JLOWV 7KH LPSDFW RI SDVW government crowding-out will be felt either now or later. To minimize the bad HŕŽ&#x2030;HFWV RI WKLV WKH FRDOLWLRQ VKRXOG KDYH three key priorities: reduce government spending as a percentage of national income (even the most Keynesian of econoPLVWV 3DXO .UXJPDQ KDV LQGLFDWHG KLV alarm at the government constituting SHUFHQWRIQDWLRQDORXWSXW FXWWD[HV across all income levels and reduce regulation (particularly the complexities of the tax code). These three measures are unlikely to stimulate short-term growth, yet excessive short-termism has been a curse of western economic management for decades. A long-term plan for growth is now a necessity. Reducing government intervention is not only desirable on an economic basis. Indeed, one ought to consider whether it is really equitable to leave future generations to deal with the ŕŽ&#x160;VFDOSUREOHPVFUHDWHGE\WKHLUSDUHQWV and grandparents. Having lived through perhaps the most stable period of rising living standards in modern economic history, the baby-boomers who have recently retired should not escape the pain RIUHYHUVLQJŕŽ&#x160;VFDOPLVPDQDJHPHQWRYHU which they presided, by letting future generations inherit the mess. Until a politician brave enough to admit this commits to making older citizens pay down a portion of their debt, we cannot hope for any kind of intergenerational equity. Despite the governmentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s grand SURPLVHVRQGHŕŽ&#x160;FLWUHGXFWLRQLWKDVKDG little success at defusing the time-bomb RI SDVW ŕŽ&#x160;VFDO RYHUH[XEHUDQFH 0RRG\â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV downgrade was hardly surprising, and with the coalition unlikely to change course from its current half-hearted attempt at austerity, further ratings relegations seem inevitable. The best the government can do is minimize public sector economic interference, by lowering spending, cutting taxes and reducing regulation, to provide the foundations for long-run economic growth and to try and recapture some degree of intergenerational equity.


10

Comment

UNION

19.03.2013

| The Beaver

Samuel Joynson

The LSESU Conservative Society is realigning LSE The London School of Economics and Political Science has been a bastion of British socialism for the bulk of its 120 year history and, judging by the continuing public mood opposing bankersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; bonuses DQGŕŽ&#x160;VFDOIUXJDOLW\WKHSDVW\HDU would seem to be an odd time for such a trend to reverse. Moreover, in a year of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;pleb-gateâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and pasty taxes (in addition to the introduction of the much-debated e IHHV IRU ŕŽ&#x160;UVW\HDU XQGHUgraduates), any suggestion that the institutionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s historic admiration for George Bernard Shaw was being replaced with an appreciation for George Oliver Osborne would almost certainly be met with incredulity. But, after three years on Houghton Street, I have learnt, with great delight, that the London School of Economics has a remarkable ability to surprise. Indeed, with a 45 per cent increase on last yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s membership with over 140 fully-paid members, the LSESU Conservative Society is currently challenging these historic political leanings, enjoying its highest membership since society records began. The oncemarginalised society has become

a political hegemon on campus, with higher membership levels than any other political society and over four times the membership of the LSEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s famous socialist societies. Attracting speakers such as the Rt. Hon. David Willetts MP (Minister for Universities and Science), Mark Hoban MP (Minister of State for Employment), the Rt. Hon. Dr Liam Fox MP (former Secretary of State for Defence), and the Rt. Hon. Sir Malcolm Rifkind MP (Chairman of the Intelligence Security Committee) over the previous six months, the society has become a popular forum for Britainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s leading politicians to discuss contemporary issues with students in an interpersonal, respectful environment. Regardless of political alignment, such a status for an LSESU student society should be celebrated across campus. Obviously, such success cannot be attributed to a single source, but a fundamental philosophical shift in the understanding of the role of university Conservative societies has certainly contributed to the societyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s transformation. Indeed, reminiscent of the grassroots focus of the National Union

of Conservative Associations following the Second Reform Act, the LSESU Conservative Society 2012-2013 has focused on attracting members that have a general interest in politics, rather than exclusively those that already identify as Conservatives. The society has accepted that most natural Conservatives have not politically self-actualised by the age of eighteen, and has therefore rejected the idea that a university Conservative society should only be a vehicle to bring together those with similar predeŕŽ&#x160;QHGEHOLHIV,QVWHDGE\SURPRWing an environment that values discourse over ideology, the society has brought a vast swathe of new members into the Conservative movement from a variety of GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQW EDFNJURXQGV WKURXJK rigorous debate and high-level exposure to Conservative ideals. It has refused to force its members into a political straitjacket, but has instead allowed their opinions and ideas to naturally become an active choice to join the Conservative movement. Moreover, the LSESU Conservative Society 2012-2013 has ŕŽ&#x160;HUFHO\FKDOOHQJHGWKHIDOODFLRXV

SHUFHSWLRQ WKDW SHUVRQDO ŕŽ&#x160;QDQFes dictate a studentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ability to partake in Conservative politics. With only a single ticketed event (the sell-out Christmas Party) DQG D ŕŽ&#x2039;DW DQQXDO PHPEHUVKLS fee of four pounds, the LSESU Conservative Society has ensured that anybody can become politically or socially involved in the society. This strong commitment to Disraeliâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;One-Nation Conservatismâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; was epitomised by WKHVRFLHW\RŕŽ&#x2030;HULQJDIUHHHQGRI year meal to all members, in an attempt to provide a foundation for the societyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s valuable Conservative friendships to be maintained after graduation. With these two ideological commitments ingrained in the management of the LSESU Conservative Society, and ChristoSKHU +XOP D WDOHQWHG ŕŽ&#x160;UVW \HDU Government student, elected as the societyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s next President, , DP FRQŕŽ&#x160;GHQW WKDW WKH VRFLHW\ ZLOO FRQWLQXH WR ŕŽ&#x2039;RXULVK IRU many years to come. Critically, in line with the ideas of Cameronâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Big Societyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not where the LSESU Conservative Society has come from that counts, but where itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going.

Letter to the Editor: Dear Sir, I would like to address any confusion surrounding my LGBT Officer campaign, which was highlighted in last weekâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Complaints and Controversiesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; piece. It is of course absolutely true that HIV and AIDS are not gay diseases. However, it is a sad fact that in this country, men who have sex with men (MSM) tend to be impacted more than others. Around one in twenty MSM in the UK are HIV positive. In London, this figure is estimated to be one in eleven. It is this association of high risk that means that MSM must remain abstinent for twelve months before being able to donate blood, another issue that I drew attention to during campaigning. I do not wish to suggest that only MSM are affected by HIV and AIDS, but I really will not shy away from flagging up that the LGBT community are impacted severely. I am pleased that Freedoms Shop, Mortimer Market and the Terrence Higgins Trust have all already expressed great interest in working with the LSE to address these issues. I am sorry that some students feel that I made it seem that â&#x20AC;&#x153;safe sex is only a homosexual problemâ&#x20AC;?. It might not be a surprise to learn that I am aware that sexual health also concerns those outside of the LGBT community, which is why the vast majority of

condoms were distributed to those who do not identify as LGBT. During my time as LGBT Officer, I will be striving for much more integration between those inside and outside of the LGBT community. I feel that my â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Play Safeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; campaign was a solid way of involving everybody. All LSE students were able to vote and so I wanted to reach as many people as possible. I understand that some students are fans of neither my campaign nor my manifesto. I guess you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t please everybody. Although my approach was somewhat different from the other two candidates, one of my opponents, Fikri Alkhatib, has some fantastic ideas and I hope to work closely with her to consider these. Handing out free condoms was always going to raise a few eyebrows. I am delighted that it did. It got attention and it got votes. Encouraging the LSE to PLAY SAFE will continue to be a priority and Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m chuffed to bits that so many are on the same page. All 782 of us. Regards, Matt White LGBT Studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Officer elect of the LSESU.

If you would like to send a Letter to the Editor, please email comment@thebeaveronline.co.uk


Comment

The Beaver | 19.03.2013

Christy Romer

11

COLUMBUS

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)DONODQGVZDQWLVVWULNLQJO\REYLRXV In that sense, the debate is a farce WKDW KDV EHHQ UHLJQLWHG IRU XOWHULRU PRWLYHV ,WтАл┌СтАмV NLQG RI VWXSLG WR KDWH WKH8.IRUNLOOLQJSHRSOHZKHQ\RXJR WR ZDU ZLWK LW RSSRVLQJ WKH JRYHUQPHQWV WKDW PDQLSXODWH DQFLHQW IHHOLQJV RI QDWLRQDOLVP IRU SROLWLFDO JDLQ DQG WKUXVWLQJ \RX LQWR WKH FRQроЛLFW LQVWHDG 7KHSHRSOHRIWKH)DONODQGVZDQW WRUHPDLQ%ULWLVKDQGWKHLVODQGVKDYH EHHQ %ULWLVK IRU  \HDUV :KHUHтАл┌СтАмV the debate?

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Letter to the Editor: Sir, DQGDWZHHWDERXWWKHPDWWHUDIWHUHOHFWLRQVFORVHG,EHOLHYHLWZRXOG I was dismayed when reading the March 12th edition of the Bea- KDYHEHHQKLJKO\DSSURSULDWHDQGDWWKHYHU\OHDVWFRXUWHRXVWRPDNH YHUWRроКQGQRDSRORJ\IRURULQGHHGSDVVLQJPHQWLRQRIWKHUHODWLYHO\ \RXUUHDGHUVDZDUHRIWKHLVVXHLQSULQW VHULRXVHUURULQFOXGHGLQWKH0DUFKWKHGLWLRQ7KHHUURUZDVWKDWRI <RXUVVLQFHUHO\ attributing my manifesto to another candidate in your coverage of the -RKQ:DUG /6(687UXVWHHHOHFWLRQ:KLOVW,UHFHLYHGDQDSRORJ\YLDHPDLOUHSO\

If you would like to send a Letter to the Editor, please email comment@thebeaveronline.co.uk


12

Comment

19.03.2013

| The Beaver

$ZDNHXSFDOOIRUPLVૹULQJ/DERXU Rayhan Uddin on an urgent new role for those on the British left With the death of their beloved leader Hugo Chavez, the Venezuelan public are being forced to consider the future of their country, and in particular the place of socialism and left-wing ideology in their political system. Here in the UK, albeit XQGHUYHU\GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQWFLUFXPstances, the left has seen its own mini-death. The rape scandal that has rocked the Socialist Workers Party, resulting in large numbers of its members defecting, has triggered a similar reconsideration of how best to mobilise the socialist movement. If ever there was an opportunity for the left to gather and rethink its strategy on KRZWREHDQHŕŽ&#x2030;HFWLYHIRUFH in British politics, it is here and now. Currently, the UK Independence Party (Ukip) are doing their level best to act as a wake up call to the Conservatives, presenting the right wing of the Tory party with a fresh alternative. Unfortunately, the same force does not exist on the left. The two electable parties further left than Labour that exist today are the Greens and Respect. While the Green party has fought hard on campaigning for a

sustainable economy with the focus on infrastructure and growth, it doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t jump out as being the party protecting the issues that most concern ordinary people who are having their living standards eroded by the coalitionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cuts. Likewise with Respect, whose foreign policy concerns with regards to Iraq and Afghanistan are no GRXEW MXVWLŕŽ&#x160;DEOH EXW DJDLQ not the priority. George Galloway may garner a lot of support with his charismatic rhetoric, but it is going to take a lot more than this populism to create a credible alternative for the left. Ultimately, the winning party in 2015 will be elected on the merits of their economic policy. The Labour Party insists that the government should focus more on growth and not be obVHVVHG ZLWK GHŕŽ&#x160;FLW UHGXFtion. Growth is important but Labour needs to shift its concern towards working people. The general public are more concerned with improving squeezed living standards and protecting the vulnerable in society. Ukip can try to scapegoat the European Union as being the root of all of our problems, but for working

people the single issue that has led to this bleak predicament is austerity. The fact of the matter is that Labour is not doing enough to oppose this austerity. Despite condemning and voting against a large majority of the cuts put forward by the coalition, Labour still insists on a path of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;austerityliteâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. Ed Balls can condemn the coalition as much as he likes, but his alternative is basically the same path, except softer and slower. The fact that austerity has been accepted as a given and that only the extent to which it is implemented determines the GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQFH EHWZHHQ /DERXU and the Conservatives is testament to the idea that the median voter on the economy is on the centre right. This is of course absurd given what right-wing austerity has done to the UK econoP\IURPLQŕŽ&#x2039;DWLRQWRXQHPployment, to a downgraded credit rating. The word â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;borrowingâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; has become so taboo that no Labour MP ever dares to utter it in the fear they may be branded a dreamy Keynesian. This is yet more evidence that the neoliberal view has prevailed. This pandering either side of the centre-right will

remain, so long as the left IDLOVWRPRELOLVHHŕŽ&#x2030;HFWLYHO\ Ed Miliband had the perfect opportunity to rebrand the Labour partyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s economic policy when he was elected leader. Instead, he decided to stick to Gordon Brownâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s SROLF\ RI KDOYLQJ WKH GHŕŽ&#x160;FLW RYHUWKHFRXUVHRIŕŽ&#x160;YH\HDUV Labour failed to win the election in 2010 because the country did not trust Brown with the economy. So while the two Eds urge George Osborne to U-turn on his economic policy of austerity, perhaps they should consider U-turning on their own proposed course of austerity. The real losers in this are the trade unions. The trade unionists were ultimately responsible for making Ed Miliband the leader of Labour and continue to fund and support the party. What have they received in return? Very little. Miliband could not even support the unions when they, quite rightly, called for strikes against the government squeeze on public sector incomes and pensions. For Miliband, there is little to worry about. While the left remains incoherent and fragmented, there is nowhere for these trade union voters to realistically defect

WR/DERXULVLQHŕŽ&#x2030;HFWKROGing them to ransom. Just like the centre-right seems to have absurdly won the debate on the economy, the same is occurring on social issues. The emergence of Ukip and its right-wing attitudes towards immigration and the EU has not only forced the Tories to reconsider policy but also compelled Labour to do so. Indeed Ed Miliband has admitted Labour â&#x20AC;&#x153;didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get immigration rightâ&#x20AC;? with their previously more liberal stance. So long as the political party spectrum remains this orientated around the right-wing, the inclination to neglect the left may continue. We need to be presented with a plan for an austerity free future that puts the ZRUNLQJ SHRSOH ŕŽ&#x160;UVW , KDYH no doubt that Labour can still be the force that delivers this. If, however, they continue on this path of diluted neoliberalism, then the trade unions and others on the left should mobilise to protect the working people. Like the threat of Ukip, this should pose a genuine wake up call to Labour and their seemingly lazy policies thus far.

$Q/6(IRUWKH*UHHQ%OXHDQG3XUSOH Lioba Hirsch on the pressing need for more diversity on LSE panels When I grew up I was White. This might seem surprising if you consider that I am half Togolese (my dad) and half German (my mum). But if you think about it, it all makes sense, because my Dad was White too. My mother was less White and still is. She sent me to special meetings for mixed-race kids and I made some friends and had fun and played as kids play, but I was way too young to understand the politics that she was trying to convey. Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t worry, this is not a sad story, I still play and have fun and friends. Somewhere along the way, however, I became less White and more aware. Because the opposite of White as a political and personal attitude is not Black or Purple, but being aware of the fact that the world is not the same for everyone. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Duhâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll think and stop reading this overly emotional

and childhood-memoryevoking-article, but actually I have a point. Not in the way that some people are Green and others are YelORZ1RWWKDWNLQGRIGLŕŽ&#x2030;HUence but something much more basic. Imagine this: you are doing your â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;mirror, mirror on the wallâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; routine, but instead of showing you that you are indeed the fairest one of all (which I am sure you are), the mirror plays you a trick and shows you an LSE public event. Shit, you think, LSE KDV ŕŽ&#x160;QDOO\ IRXQG D ZD\ WR take over your personal space as well and now your magic mirror cannot even serve as a normal mirror anymore. But you stay and watch, because in a way this is kind of cool. And this is where it gets important. If you are a white young promising male LSE student, the mirror might not be a mirror anymore, but it might be again in 40

years, because in 40 years you will resemble the important intellectuals discussing worldly things on that panel. Your hair colour PLJKWEHGLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQWDQG\RX would never even consider wearing THAT suit, but you can see yourself as a more important, better looking version of what the mirror presents you with. If you are me, the mirror is never going to be a mirror again. Because even though I was White growing up, I am never going to be White, PDOHDQGEROG QRRŕŽ&#x2030;HQVH  and neither are all the women at LSE, all the minority groups in terms of ethnicity, nationality, sexuality or what you could possibly imagine. Now, take that magic mirror and walk around LSE. Sit in a classroom, go to another LSE event, pop into the Board of Directors meeting. And you will more or less experience the

same thing all over again. Yes, the LSE is in the UK and Europe, where you are generally prone to encounter more White people than other people. But, the LSE is one of the most diverse universities in the world with â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;more nationalities than the United Nationsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. In terms of gender and nationality, if you look at LSE events, you get the Security Council, not the member states. No, I did not join some revolutionary movement in response (although maybe I should have done), but I realised and still realise everyday, that it is hard for us to wrap our heads around these things and that these things represent realities and facts that are more difficult for us to accept. We usually prefer to think less and take things for granted and make ourselves feel comfortable with the way the world is. And no, I am

not saying that the world has treated me unfairly, I am saying that I want to live in a world where I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t feel the need to go to special meetings for mixed kids anymore. Not because the kids there are lame, but because if we can all play together without the risk of the little White boys turning into the playground oligarchy, the playground would be so much more fun! So whoever you are, Green, Blue or Purple, old apple or young banana, be an ally! Like us on facebook (look for W.E. are LSE) or add us on twitter @wearlse2013. If you want to be a darling, sign our Petition â&#x20AC;&#x153;End male, pale and stale panels at LSE public events!â&#x20AC;? on ipetitions. For questions and comments email wearelse2013@ gmail.com


Comment

The Beaver | 19.03.2013

13

â&#x20AC;ŤÚ?â&#x20AC;Ź,QVX૸HUDEOHDQGVHOૹVKK\SRFULV\â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;Ź Emir Nader RQKRZZHFDQUHDOO\DVVLVWLQWKHâ&#x20AC;Ťŕ­˝Ú?â&#x20AC;ŹJKWIRUHTXDOLW\â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;Ź Today after I write this article I intend to ask my friend who works as a consultant at McKinsey for information on how to get a job with them. This is not something I thought I would ever see myself doing. From the age of political awareness I have been solidly left-wing with a deep scepticism of the private sector, free market and a fairly healthy disrespect of traditional order and authority. However, my three years at LSE have partly been characterised by an increasing disillusionment with left-wingers, our politics and action â&#x20AC;&#x201C; not, I add, the cause of human suffering and injustice. My left-wing peers and I passionately moralise and castigate the actions of the government, businesses etc., but few of us do anything. It makes me think that we should update the phrase from armchair socialist to â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Guardiansharing revolutionaryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; for all of my comrades who seem to think that Facebook-sharing polemics to already sympathetic friends, or the occasionally bought Big Issue, is going to change the world. No, I think we all know our politics and political action isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t guided by a pure desire to help people. I think the politics of our left-wing bleedingheart liberals is a politics of vanity, designed at convincing

ourselves that we are good people. I say this of even when we do act too, which I will later address. 7ZR WKLQJV VROLGLŕŽ&#x160;HG WKLV realisation for me. It was ŕŽ&#x160;UVWO\ WKDW WKH LGHD WKDW LI we really wanted to change the world we should become city-boys and donate all of our wages besides the bare minimum needed to live to charLW\7KLVZRXOGPDNHLQŕŽ&#x160;QLWHO\ PRUH GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQFH WR DOOHYLDWH LQMXVWLFHV DQG VXŕŽ&#x2030;HULQJ WKDQ a comparable person hoping to work directly for a charity or â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;in Africaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;; moreover you would be helping the cause of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;the goodâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; incredibly more than those who would criticise you with structuralist arguments about propping up the system that creates these problems. It is bullshit to think that simply reading the Guardian, buying fair-trade and signing an online petition is justice enough! I want to argue that the VXSHUŕŽ&#x160;FLDO YDQLW\ RI GHVLULQJ to see oneself as a good person working in a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;right-onâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; job guides far too many of us. Otherwise, why wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t we try our hardest to earn the biggest possible pay-cheque and donate it to charity? The GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQFH WR SHRSOHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV OLYHV it would make comparatively outweighs any argument against doing so. A second realisation has

VROLGLŕŽ&#x160;HG WKLV YLHZ WKDW DOO RI us left-wingers are the most LQVXŕŽ&#x2030;HUDEOH DQG VHOŕŽ&#x160;VK K\SRcrites. Think of the money we spend by wilfully convincing ourselves that we need a Mac, need an iPhone, need new shoes, or that ÂŁ200 weekend. Then we return to the political arena and decry the injustice of others. With that money we could be saving lives. I am talking about us as individuals, not as a society. You could stop somebody dying. For instance, every 45 seconds a child dies of malaria. Re-read this as: every 45 seconds a child dies a death that could have been prevented. Yes, individually we could not stop all of these deaths, but we could individually save many lives. In short and with no hyperbole, there is blood on all of our hands. Peter Singer makes the point that our morality demands that we would save a child drowning in a pond we walked past. Yet we know that people are dying thousands of miles away and yet we â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;walk pastâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; this pond; it is simply distance as a morally DUELWUDU\GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQFHKHUH What I have experienced at LSE and is evident elsewhere in London, Britain and the politics of the developed world is that our discourse and debate is really a vanity of small differences. The passion with

which we decried the abolishment of the 10p tax rate or the lack of mansion tax is splitting hairs in the grand scheme of WKLQJV \RX EHDU DQ LQŕŽ&#x160;QLWHO\ closer resemblance to Eric Pickles than the hungry and oppressed you see yourself siding with. An Oxford professor called Toby Ord is one of the few who donates the most feasibly possible of his wages to charity. I see few of around us who look likely to become this consistent in their morals and politics. Therefore, when I think about these hypocrisies and vanities, I can only look with disillusioned scepticism at the liberals, egalitarians and socialists of all stripes in our VRFLHW\ ZKR â&#x20AC;ŤÚ?â&#x20AC;ŹŕŽ&#x160;JKW IRU HTXDOityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. How dare we make arguments about the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;injusticeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; of the gender and racial compositions of our CEO boards and parliaments when hunger and poverty still devastates the lives of millions and we live in WKHZHDOWKLHVWŕŽ&#x160;YHSHUFHQWRI the world. Incidentally, it is this foolish belief that our politics is so important in the name of justice that allows those of us active in politics to believe they are on some divine mission. Both the abuse of expenses by MPs of all colours and the covering up of a case of sexual abuse by the Socialist Workersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Party speaks of our politi-

cal activists believing they are above common morality, when really it is little but vanity. I do, however, subscribe to the idea that a little justice is better than no justice. That gender and racial equality in our comfortable, liberal society is better than otherwise. But such judgements allow us to make other calculations of this kind. I have come from a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;poorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and essentially working-class upbringing; my mother was a cleaner for most of my childhood and raised me singlehandedly. My sister also has special needs, and ultimately I know that to alleviate their worries and make their lives comfortable in later years, especially after my mother stops working, I will need to support them. It is on this basis that I hope to drop all the moralising DQG LQVXŕŽ&#x2030;HUDEOH SUHWHQVLRQV of some of the humanitarians and egalitarians among us and do the most good I can see possible. Yes, it would be better to donate the majority of the wages I hope to earn to charity, and maybe I will do â&#x20AC;&#x201C; if I do donate a little it would stop a lot more needless death than the actions of those who criticise the private-sectorâ&#x20AC;&#x201C; but by my understanding noone but Toby Ord has the right to tell me so.

5DGLRDFWLYHZROYHVDQGDVEHVWRV ([HFXWLYH(GLWRU/LDP%URZQDQDO\VHVZKHUH/6(FDQVWLOOLPSURYH I can picture it, walking down Houghton Street with my son or daughter in about twenty or thirty years time exclaiming â&#x20AC;&#x153;when I was your age, this is where I had my lecturesâ&#x20AC;? or â&#x20AC;&#x153;that building wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t here back in the good â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;ol days!â&#x20AC;? Memory is a funny thing, really. As much as we all now complain about the crumbling walls, formative courses and WKDWŕŽ&#x160;FNOHIRUFHWKDWLVVWXGHQW politics, most of us will grow a strange bond to this institution as we depart for bigger, and hopefully better, things. Before I don the rose-coloured glasses, though, I want to give a rundown of what I think the School is doing right, and what it needs to work on. First and foremost, the LSE needs to stop accepting donations from war criminals and Holocaust deniers. While they wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t disclose whether or not the new donation vetting pro-

cess since the Woolf Report has actually stopped any money ŕŽ&#x2039;RZLQJLQWRWKH/6(IURPVKDG\ sources, I would have thought that after the disastrous public LPDJHKLWWKH*DGGDŕŽ&#x160;6FDQGDO LQŕŽ&#x2039;LFWHG RQ WKH /6( WKH JRRG people at ODAR would have looked at renaming the Sheikh Zayed Theatre, perhaps this time honouring someone who did not actively support Holocaust deniers. This is not to say that the LSE must hold all their donors to a moral benchmark usually reserved for clergymen (well at least the non-paedophile men of the cloth), but a quick scan of the CIAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Most Wanted list may be a wise idea before accepting cash - especially if itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s inside a briefcase. All hope is not lost, though - the man for which the new studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; centre will be named, Saw Swee Hock, seems like an all-around decent human being. Hopeful-

ly the School can continue to solicit donations from people like this. Since I promised to highlight some of the good the LSE is doing, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s time to heap praise on Craig Calhoun who was a stellar choice for LSE Director. Since he has taken up his post he has been a very positive force for an institution that needed strong leaderVKLSDIWHUWKH*DGGDŕŽ&#x160;6FDQGDO While there is still much to do in winning back LSEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s reputation from the series of meltdowns in recent years and in as much as Judith Rees was a solid Director for her brief time in the position, the appointment of Calhoun will hopefully set the School on the right track for the future - and what I personally believe will be privatisation within the decade. There, that was some praise. Now time for some more whingeing.

Another area the School desperately needs to work on is the centre block of buildings. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s basically the East Building and Clare Market, but also St. Clements. By all accounts, the latter - while ugly - doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t need much of a redoing, but the former two need more reconstructive surgery than a car crash victim. How these buildings have been allowed to fester in the condition they are in is, quite frankly, appalling. The peeling paint on the exterior of the Clare Market staircase connecting to the East Building is reminiscent of the empty town of Chernobyl, 30 years after the disaster. Although, somewhat luckily, it appears we, unlike Chernobyl, donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have any radioactive wolves roaming through the streets. But it is no wonder LSE is known as the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;greatest academic slum��&#x20AC;&#x2122; in the world. Estates is very good at acquiring new build-

ings at good prices, but the upkeep of the older buildings at the School has to be urgently looked into. In my time at the LSE there has been a great deal of change - over three years there have been three Directors of the School and two fees increases. Hopefully once the dust has settled over the donations scandal from 2010/2011, Calhoun and the rest of the leadership team at the LSE can get to work attracting the best and brightest - not just the rich and wealthiest. It has been a great three years, and there are so many people to thank for that. Just like every school, the LSE has its share of issues. With a little work, this institution can gain back the reputation it deserves. Oh, and the asbestos. Please get rid of the asbestos.


Social

620('5,)7:22'

14

19.03.2013

| The Beaver

The art of

making friends -Hŕ­ź0RRQWKHKRZWRPDNHDQGPDLQWDLQIULHQGVKLSV

T

hree of us were on the train from Cambridge back to London one Saturday afternoon, analysing and reminiscing over the very eventful past twenty-four hours. We had spent the night dancing, playing croquet, and giving ourselves fake backstories, and spent the morning recovering from the night before. Midway through the journey, one of P\ IULHQGV â&#x20AC;Ť Ú&#x2039;â&#x20AC;ŹLQ IDFW WKH ŕŽ&#x160;UVW SHUVRQ RXWVLGH RI P\ ŕŽ&#x2039;DW WKDW , KDG PHW DW the LSE â&#x20AC;&#x201C; said something along the lines of: â&#x20AC;&#x153;This weekend has really FHPHQWHG RXU UHODWLRQVKLS  ,Wâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV OLNH Week Ten of Michaelmas Term again, when that last bit of awkwardness melted away because we went out together every night.â&#x20AC;? 7KDWâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV ZKHQ LW KLW PH â&#x20AC;Ť Ú&#x2039;â&#x20AC;ŹKRZ IDU ZHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹGFRPHVLQFHWKDWŕŽ&#x160;UVWGD\LQWKH UHJLVWUDWLRQ OLQH  6WDUWLQJ RŕŽ&#x2030; DW D new school, or at any new environment, is still simultaneously exciting and nerve-wracking, just like it was RQ WKH ŕŽ&#x160;UVW GD\ RI NLQGHUJDUWHQ VR PDQ\\HDUVDJR,WKRXJKWDERXWWKH academic and professional opportuQLWLHV WKDW WKH /6( DŕŽ&#x2030;RUGHG PH EHIRUH , FDPH KHUH â&#x20AC;Ť Ú&#x2039;â&#x20AC;ŹQRZ , MXVW ZDQW to make friends. But how exactly do you make friends? You want to JLYH RWKHUV D JRRG ŕŽ&#x160;UVW LPSUHVVLRQ EXW\RXGRQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹWUHDOO\NQRZKRZRWKHUV perceive you. You want to be open, EXWQRWVHHPGHVSHUDWHRUQHHG\,Wâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV

a tricky balance. 6RRQWKHŕŽ&#x160;UVWGD\RIFODVV,ZHQW in hoping to not make a fool of myVHOI/XFNLO\,UDQLQWRWKDWJLUOIURP the registration line again, and as a FRQŕŽ&#x160;GHQFHERRVW,PHWRWKHUVZKR, felt, must have presented themselves far more aggressively/cluelessly/igQRUDQWO\WKDQ,GLG&ODVVHVVWDUWHG and everyone else was in the same ERDWŕŽ&#x160;VKLQJDURXQGIRUIULHQGV&RQversations were still very hushed and VDIH DQG \RX ZHUHQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹW VXUH ZKR WR smile at or whether you could ask soand-so to have lunch, but invitations were extended and readily taken up. You knew you had arrived when that Facebook friend request came in. And the process repeated with every aspect of your time here â&#x20AC;&#x201C; every module, every seminar group, every society or athletics club, every VWXGHQWUHVLGHQFH7KLQJVVWDUWHGRŕŽ&#x2030; quiet, tentative, and awkward, but after a few weeks â&#x20AC;&#x201C; or in some cases, DIWHU D VLJQLŕŽ&#x160;FDQW QXPEHU RI ZHHNV SRVVLEO\DSSURDFKLQJŕŽ&#x160;IWHHQRUWZHQty â&#x20AC;&#x201C; it, in most cases, became comfortable. You saw each other regularO\ \RX OHDUQHG HDFK RWKHUâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV QDPHV and as soon as some people started talking, the tension was reduced for everyone else. There were also those people who were just naturally better at socialising and including others, who took

the initiative to reduce that tension. Parties and outings were organised far away from the LSE, and you know WKDW\RXâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹUHRQO\UHDOIULHQGVRQFH\RX start hanging out somewhere other than where you usually hang out. <RXâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹYH WKHQ PRYHG LQWRWKHUHDOPRI WKHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ?â&#x20AC;ŹWUXHIULHQGFLUFOHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;Ź Looking back over the year, you can start to identify when each of WKHVH â&#x20AC;ŤÚ?â&#x20AC;ŹIULHQG FLUFOHVâ&#x20AC;Ť Ú&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVWDUWHG IRUPing. Going to (or even just the predrinking before) Fabrik or the Ministry of Sound, semi-spontaneous day trips outside of London, cooking dinners and potlucks together, lining up in the nippy London winter for concerts, epic Saturday nights that somehow became Sunday mornings, and of course, learning about what (and who) others do in the bedroom. These are the relationships and memories that will last long after our deJUHHSURJUDPPHVDUHRYHUDQGZHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹUH dispersed all over the world. A few days ago, at one of my exWUDFXUULFXODUV , ŕŽ&#x160;QDOO\ OHDUQHG WKH QDPH RI VRPHRQH , KDG WDONHG WR RQ an almost weekly basis for the past WHUP â&#x20AC;Ť Ú&#x2039;â&#x20AC;ŹD WDG ODWH SHUKDSV EXW LWâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV D start. That same day, one of the othHUVWXGHQWVRFLHWLHV,â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹPLQYROYHGZLWK VDZWKHFXOPLQDWLRQRID\HDUâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVZRUWK of work. We had bonded so much in the rehearsal for and lead-up to this, and suddenly, it was over â&#x20AC;&#x201C; but it was

also the start of a new group dynamic, one that will lead to more non-rehearsal-based bonding in the weeks and months to come. ,Wâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV QRZ WKH ODVW ZHHN RI /HQW Term. The year is more than half RYHU DQG ZKLOH ,â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹYH VWLOO JRW DQRWKHU year to go, a lot of my friends will be gone for good after the summer. To make this pseudo-expiration date on our relationship (in the â&#x20AC;&#x153;see/bump into-each-other-every-so-oftenâ&#x20AC;? way that we have become accustomed to) even more pressing, people are already going away during the Easter EUHDN$QGDOOWKLVULJKWZKHQZHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹYH VWDUWHGWRIHHOUHOD[HGLQHDFKRWKHUâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV company and dropped all boundaries as to what we can say to each other. Another friend mentioned that roughly 70 per cent of all conversaWLRQ LV JRVVLS DQG â&#x20AC;Ť Ú&#x2039;â&#x20AC;Ź,â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹP QRW VXUH LI our other friends picked up on it â&#x20AC;&#x201C; that means that we could potentially lose 70 per cent of our conversation PDWHULDO DIWHU WKH \HDU LV RYHU  ,â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹG like to think, though, that my friends DQG , KDYH PRUH WKDQ RWKHU IULHQGV LQ FRPPRQ  :Hâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹOO KDYH WKH 6XPPHU Term, and then hopefully the summer, to get together, and when we PHHW VRPH XQVSHFLŕŽ&#x160;HG WLPH LQ WKH IXWXUHZHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹOONQRZZKDWWRGRWRKDYH a good time: drop sexual innuendos, take train rides through the British countryside, the list goes on â&#x20AC;Ś


The Beaver | 19.03.2013

Social

15

Two thirds through

Nona Buckley-Irvine UHрн╛HFWVRQOLIHDVDVHFRQG\HDU

T

wenty weeks of term have now passed. Weeks of drama, boredom, hardwork, laziness, hangoYHUV FRроЙHH IXHOOHG ODWH QLJKWHUV 7KH \HDU IHHOV OLNH WLPH ZDV DKHDG RI XV UDWKHU WKDQ XV EHLQJ DKHDG RI WLPH Personally, I love these periods of time DV \RX FDQ UHроЛHFW XSRQ WKH \HDU DQG XVH WKDW EHDXWLIXO JLIW RI KLQGVLJKW WR WRUWXUH \RXUVHOI ZLWK WKLQJV WKDW \RX VKRXOGRUVKRXOGQRWKDYHGRQH :HOO ODVW \HDU ZDV WRUWXRXV EXW WKLV KDV EHHQ ZHOFRPLQJO\ GLроЙHUHQW )LUVW\HDULVWXUEXOHQWWRVD\WKHOHDVW /HW ORRVH IURP \RXU SDUHQWV IRU WKH роКUVWWLPHроКQGLQJ\RXUIHHWLQ/RQGRQ dealing with a range of adolescents LQ VZHDW\ QLJKWFOXEV HYHQ KDYLQJ WR VFUXE \RXU RZQ WRLOHW 7KH LQWHQVLW\ RI WKH \HDU OHDYHV \RX QHHGLQJ D VXIILFLHQWO\PXQGDQHPRQWKEDFNKRPHWR UHJURXSDQGSURFHVVZKDWH[DFWO\KDG gone on. 6HFRQG\HDULVJORULRXVO\GLроЙHUHQW <RXDUHQRORQJHULQKDOOVDQG\RXDUHD OLWWOHELWZLVHU+DYLQJGRQHWKHUXVKHG ODVW PLQXWH HVVD\V PXOWLSOH FRQVHFXWLYH QLJKWV RXW DQG SRRU HDWLQJ \RX UHDOO\GROHDUQDORW6XFKDVтАл┌ЮтАм Allnighters are not acceptable. /DVW \HDUтАл┌СтАмV /HQW WHUP VDZ QXPHURXV QLJKWV VSHQW LQ WKH OLEUDU\ XQWLO WKH HDUO\ KRXUV RU DOO WKURXJK WKH QLJKW FUDVKHGRXWRQWKRVHEHDQEDJVZHDOO NQRZDQGORYH$FWXDOO\ZRUNLVSUHWW\ PDQDJHDEOH LI \RXтАл┌СтАмUH QRW JRLQJ RXW DQGPDQDJH\RXUWLPHDWOHDVWD OLWWOHHроЙHFWLYHO\

7KHUH DUH JUHDWHU SOHDVXUHV LQ life than alcohol. Yes, I love my lambrini/wine/vodka/beer/anything mineVZHHSHGRQDQLJKWRXW<HWGULQNLQJ in moderation has meant more memRUDEOH QLJKWV OHVV SRXQGV SLOHG RQ DQG PRUH PRQH\ LQ WKH SRFNHW <RX DOVR KDYH WKH RSSRUWXQLW\ WR GR RWKHU WKLQJV )RU H[DPSOH YLVLWLQJ WKH 1Dtional Portrait Gallery. This year has VHHQ PDQ\ D VWXGHQW DWWHPSW WR EHFRPH PRUH SUHWHQWLRXV DQG LQWHOOHFWXDOтАл┌ЛтАмZK\QRW" :ULJKWV%DUFKLSVDUHQRWDVXEVWLWXWHIRUDSURSHUPHDO1XWULWLRQPDWWHUV &KHDS IRRG FDQ RQO\ JHW \RX VR IDUDQGDOOLWUHDOO\JHWV\RXLVIDWWHU Chips at 95p are a fantastic hangover WUHDW EXW QRW D UHJXODU PHDO 0HDQwhile, tins of processed food are also FKHDS EXW ZRUU\LQJO\ ODFNLQJ LQ QXtrients. When friends threatened me ZLWK WKH QRWLRQ RI VFXUY\ , ODXJKHG LQ WKH IDFH RI GDQJHU %XW DFWXDOO\ VSHQGLQJ PRQH\ RQ GHFHQW IRRG VXFK DV SDVWD DQG FKLFNHQ PHDQV WKDW \RX are both healthier and more socially acceptable. =RR %DU LV VWLOO IXQ LQ \RXU VHFRQG \HDUтАл ┌ЮтАмEXW QRW TXLWH DV IXQ DV роКUVW :KLOH LW LV D JUHDW ZD\ WR EXPS LQWR DFTXDLQWDQFHV WKDW \RX ZRXOG QHYHU VHHXVXDOO\WKHLQWHQVH$8EXEEOHFDQ JHWWLULQJ1RWWRPHQWLRQWKHPLGZHHN KDQJRYHUVтАл┌ЮтАм 6KRUHGLWFK LV QRW MXVW IRU KLSVWHUV $V D VXSSOHPHQW WR =RR YHQWXULQJ (DVWLVGHроКQLWHO\UHFRPPHQGDEOH)HD-

WXULQJ OHVV *XHWWD DQG PRUH FORWKHV itтАЩs certainly a change from fresher OLIH VSHQW LQ =RR 0LQLVWU\ DQG 7LJHU 7LJHU 1HYHUWKHOHVV \RX VWLOO QHHG WR GULQNFRSLRXVDPRXQWVWRGHDOZLWKWKH heavy, heavy beats - so itтАЩs really no EHWWHU WKDQ RXU IDYRXULWH :HGQHVGD\ night destination. <RXGRQтАл┌СтАмWKDYHWRGRHYHU\WKLQJ%\ everything, I mean sit on more than RQH FRPPLWWHH JR WR YDULRXV VRFLHW\ HYHQWVSXEOLFOHFWXUHVVHHIULHQGVJR RXWDQGWKHQGR\RXUGHJUHHRQWRSRI LW DOO /LPLWLQJ WKHVH DFWLYLWLHV UHVXOWV in a better mental state of mind and allows for time to sleep. )ULHQGV DUH ZKDW UHDOO\ FRXQW 3UREDEO\ WKH EHVW WKLQJ DERXW VHFRQG \HDU LV DFWXDOO\ PDNLQJ роКUP IULHQGVKLSV DQG VHHLQJ HDFK RWKHU WKURXJK both the good and the bad, while stalking their Facebook timeline way back WRDQGODWHWRVHHKRZPXFKRIDQ LGLRWWKH\ZHUH7KRXJKWZHQW\ZHHNV is no time at all, having the time to sit ZLWKIULHQGVDQGOHDUQDERXWWKHPDQG vice versa, is one of the greatest pleasXUHV The most important lesson is that XQLYHUVLW\ LV QRW JRLQJ WR EH SHUIHFW ,тАл┌СтАмG KRSHG WKDW FRPLQJ WR XQLYHUVLW\ ZRXOG VHH WKH HQG RI <HDU 7HQ VW\OH GUDPDV TXLEEOHV DQG FUXVKHV 1R 2I FRXUVH QRW 3HRSOH KDYH IDOOHQ RXW RYHU WKH SDVW WZHQW\ ZHHNV UXPRXUV have spread, hearts have been broken. ,GHDOLVLQJ WKLV H[SHULHQFH WR EH WKH PRVW KDSS\ H[SHULHQFH RI \RXU OLIH LV

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16

Social

19.03.2013

| The Beaver

Relieving the pressure

Jiayi Fan on avoiding overwhelming pressure and anxiety

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The Beaver | 19.03.2013

Social

17

Thinking in the classroom

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18

Advert

19.03.2013

| The Beaver

STARS and SU Awards NOMINATIONS ARE NOW OPEN FOR STARS AND SU AWARDS. THE STARS AWARDS GIVE YOUR CLUB OR SOCIETY AN IMPORTANT OPPORTUNITY TO SHOWCASE WHAT THEY HAVE DONE OVER THE LAST YEAR AND BE AWARDED FOR THE BRILLIANT ACTIVITIES THAT HAVE TAKEN PLACE. THE SU AWARDS REWARD OUTSTANDING ACTIVITIES AND WORK THAT INDIVIDUALS, CLUBS AND SOCIETIES HAVE CARRIED OUT. IF YOU CAN THINK OF ANY INDIVIDUAL, CLUB OR SOCIETY WHO DESERVES THIS AWARD PLEASE NOMINATE THEM. NOMINATIONS CLOSE ON THE 21ST OF MARCH. FOR MORE INFORMATION ABOUT THE AWARDS OR NOMINATIONS FORMS PLEASE GO TO: WWW.LSESU.COM/ACTIVITIES/AWARDSANDRECOGNITION/ OR CONTACT IAIN PULLAR, SOCIETIES DEVELOPMENT COORDINATOR: I.T.PULLAR@LSE.AC.UK

FRIDAY 3RD MAY BLUEPRINT BAR


19

SATIRE | 19.03.2013

DEAL OF THE WEEK

BNP FOREIGNER CUDGEL Tuesday, March 19, 2013

£24.99

99p

PLUS!

Operation Elmtree expands its reach An investigation has been launched into a prominent member of the LSE community. All the gory details inside tomorrow!

UNION AND FASCISTS IN BED TOGETHER LSESU unites with FASCISTS and they say it was a MISTAKE! see inside!

E V I S U L C X A SON E

IT’S CRAIGIE WOT DONE IT!


20

EDITORIAL BOARD Imprisoned Editor-In-Chief Ginger Whoreby cell420@bellmarsh.gov.uk

Editor-At-Large Tanned Ale betterosama@waldo.co.uk

Immigrant Finder Lion Balm UNYPMĂ&#x201E;U'\RIHIUW\RPWJV\R

Misogyny Editor Heather Loves-Wange JOLJR\YWYP]PSLNL'WHNLJV\R

Voicemail Expert Berecca Rooks cell121@bellmarsh.gov.uk

Advertising Don Nota Bucksome-Vine Ă&#x201E;UK`V\YMLL['SHUKTPULJV\R

Libel Lawyer Vacant   'QVIZUL[

ADDRESS OF RECORD 23Q WAPPING HIGH STREET WAPPING. UK. E5W 1P4 LEVESON TOLD US TO SAY: â&#x20AC;&#x153;All articles in this section (starting page 19, ending on page 24) are satirical and none of the articles are real. Any resemblance to real people or organsations is purely coincidentalâ&#x20AC;?

19.03.2013 | SATIRE

STAND UP AND BE COUNTED There comes a time in every paper editorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s career where they have to stand up and be counted. I would like to take this editorial space to set out a few misconceptions about precisely where we get our information. I can categorically state that none of this information was obtained by the hacking of answering machines on mobile phones.

government and LSESU already do to FHUWDLQ VXEYHUVLYH VWXGHQWV VSHFLĂ&#x20AC;FDOO\ those demanding that the Sabbs take a pay cut, already.

In other news we here at the Son have heard about there being concerns with the third page of the publication. We agree, the design has been a bit shoddy of late. So therefore we will be hiring These days itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all done through reading a new designer to really bring out the emails on the LSE IT system, whenever subtleties and nuance that the page dethe (sh)IT services department can be serves. fucked to get the whole thing running. So if you have a potential scoop for us to $OVRIHHOIUHHWRĂ LFNWRWKHDUWVDQGFXO have a look at, then feel free to just email ture section on page XXX where you can it to yourself, and weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll have a cheeky read a review of a play or something. gander whenever we feel like it. By us- The more pages people read the more ing the massive power afforded to us by ZHFDQĂ HHFHSHRSOHIRUDGYHUWLVLQJ6R the combined forces of the LSE Council go on, give it a go. of Elders, the NRA and Simon from Alpha Books any appropriate key words will be So enjoy, dear reader, and feel free to Ă DJJHG DQG WKH HPDLO ZLOO EH UHDG E\ D send a complaint email to yourself, so we relevant authority. Kind of what the UK can duly ignore it.


SATIRE | 19.03.2013

21

WANKE: MY GENDER NEUTRAL TOILET HELL JASON Wanke has revealed to 7KH6RQWKHKRUULÃ&#x20AC;FGHWDLOVRIKLV six-hour imprisonment in a gender neutral toilet whilst holidaying in Thailand three years ago. It was DQLQFLGHQWWKDWKHVD\V´VFDUUHGµ KLPERWKSK\VLFDOO\DQGPHQWDOO\ SURPSWLQJ D FUXVDGH DJDLQVW WKH ´KRUURUµRIWKHVHIDFLOLWLHV 6SHDNLQJ H[FOXVLYHO\ WR WKLV QHZVSDSHU :DQNH VDLG KRZ KH KDG EHHQ IRUFHG WR XVH WKH WRLOHW ZKLOVWFOXEELQJLQ%DQJNRNLQWKH VXPPHU RI  ´,W ZDV RQH RI WKRVHSODFHVZLWKMXVWRQHWRLOHWLQ what looked on the outside to be D VWRUDJH FXSERDUG /LNH D WUDLQ bathroom or something. I really VKRXOG KDYH MXVW FRUNHG LW XQWLO , ZHQWKRPH,WÒ&#x2039;VGHÃ&#x20AC;QLWHO\KRZ,UROO ZKHQ,JRFOXEELQJQRZµ ´, FRXOGQÒ&#x2039;W Ã&#x20AC;QG DQ\ZKHUH HOVH WRJRµ:DQNHWHDUIXOO\UHPLQLVFHG ´,ZDVWRXFKLQJFORWKE\WKDWSRLQW DQG IUDQNO\ , ZDVQÒ&#x2039;W SUHSDUHG WR risk any natives doing my dryFOHDQLQJµ $IWHUVHHLQJ0U%URZQDQGKLV IULHQGRIIWRWKHFRDVW:DQNHVDLG that he turned around to see that WKHKDQGOHRIWKHFXELFOHGRRUKDG IDOOHQRIIOHDYLQJKLPWUDSSHGLQ VLGHWKHIDFLOLW\ :DQNHÒ&#x2039;V Ã&#x20AC;UVW WKRXJKW ZDV IRU

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UNITED WITH FASCISTS?

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WHUZDUGV YLD VPRNH VLJQDO IURP DVSHFLDOO\HUHFWHGFKDLURXWVLGH WKH &ODUH 0DUNHW %XLOGLQJ  LQ ZKLFK 0V 3XWLQ'D\ GHVFULEHG KHUVHOIDVEHLQJ´ZHOOKXQJµWKH GHFLVLRQWRHQWHULQWRWKLVOHDJXH RIH[WUDRUGLQDU\FLVEDGGLHRUJDQ LVDWLRQVRIHYLO ZDV GRQH RQ WKH EDVLVWKDW´WKH\ORRNHGZHOOÃ&#x20AC;WLQ WKRVHZHOOWDVW\XQLIRUPVµ ,W LV FXUUHQWO\ XQNQRZQ ZKDW H[DFWO\ WKH WHUPV RI WKH DJUHH ment between the two organisaWLRQV PHDQV (DUO\ UHSRUWV LQGL FDWHWKDWLQDUHODWLRQVKLSUDWKHU VLPLODUWRWKDWRIWKH8QLWHG.LQJ GRP DQG (8665 LW LV OLNHO\ WR PHDQ JURDQLQJ EXUHDXFUDF\ H[FHVVLYH OHJDO SURFHGXUHV DQG QHYHU KDYLQJ D VLQJOH 5()(5 (1'80RQDQ\WKLQJ 7KHULYHUVRIEORRGWKDW3XWLQ

'D\DQGKHU&DELQHWDUHUHVSRQ sible have already been seen in WKH ODWHVW XQLIRUPV IRU WKH $WK OHWLFV 8QLRQ :KLOVW PDQ\ $8 members have given a positive UHFHSWLRQ DERXW WKH EODFNVKLUWV DPHPEHURIWKH6ZLPPLQJ&OXE - who wishes to remain anonymous - has expressed a view WKDWWKH\DUH´KDUGWRVZLPLQµ ,Q OLJKW RI WKH FULVLV KDFNV within the Studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Union have GHPDQGHG WKDW WKH 6FKRRO DS SRLQW 1LJHO )DUDJH DV 3URIHV VRU RI (XURSHDQ 6WXGLHV ZLWKLQ WKH *RYHUQPHQW 'HSDUWPHQW $OWKRXJK 3.HO] KDV GLVPLVVHG WKHVH FDOOV DV ´LQDUWLFXODWHµ YLD KLVYHQWULORTXLVWGXPP\RI-RKQ 6WXDUW0LOOLWVHHPVOLNHO\VRPH VRUWRIFRQFHVVLRQZLOOEHPDGH WR WKH /LEHUWDULDQ 5LJKW E\ WKH WLPHRIWKH6WXGHQWVÒ&#x2039;8QLRQ$*0 7KH *HQHUDO 6HFUHWDU\HOHFW ZDV XQDYDLODEOH IRU FRPPHQW KDYLQJ PRELOLVHG WKH -& WKH 6DPSVRQ %DWWDOLRQ RI WKH &67 WKH &), ,7((9(( WKH %%: %1%1 DQG WKH 6WDWH 'HSDUW ment.


22

TERRIBLE RACISTS! WERE

CALHOUNIGAN’S

FAMILY SLAVERS?

WAS Commissar Calhounigan destined for greatness from his immaculate conception? The Son’s crack team of genealogists have begun their search through the Leader’s family history to see if the great leader himself is actually related to one of the most important statescisman of the United States’ formative years. /V^L]LYKPMÄJ\S[PLZOH]LLTLYNLKMYVT[OL]LY` Z[HY[^P[OSLHKPUNÄN\YLZJ\YYLU[S`Z[Y\NNSPUN[V^VYR out precisely what the ‘J’ stands for in C J Calhounigan. Early speculation surrounding it indicates that it could be Jefferson, which the Son understands to be a genetic trait passed down the years. But he has a similar surname, so they’re like 90 per cent sure. For further insight into the possible effects of what this revelation could mean for the head of the LSE, the Son has interviewed its pet expert on the New World, Professor Alwyn Skud: Q: Do you have a favourite Vice-President? A: Yesh, it has to be John C. Calhoun, average VicePresident, terrible racist. Q: Calhoun? A: Yesh, very famoush family, quite a fascinating man, don’t you know? He was renowned as a war hawk and also for modernising the Department for War. Broadly speaking, he was an inspiration to the secessionists well before Buchanan. In 1957, the :LUH[LZLSLJ[LKOPTHZVULVM[OLÄ]LNYLH[LZ[:LUH tors of all time. Q: Hold on a minute. There was a War department? A: Yesh. Full of terrible, terrible racists. Q: Do you have anything further you think our readers should know about the potential ancestor of our Commissar? A: Yesh. Lincoln was probably a homosexual. Q: Really? What do you think that means for studies of the Civil War? A: American Civil War? Shilly little business. Bishbash-bosh. Over and done with. Q: But wasn’t it one of the worst wars in history up until that point? A: Yesh, but you have to remember that most of the people killed were foreign. Q: Thank-you Professor Skud. A: I’ve got another book out.

19.03.2013 | SATIRE


23

SATIRE | 19.03.2013

W H AT A COCK UP! THE Son can exclusively man posing wealthy Saudi reveal that the disgustingly Sheikh, who they thought LTISHaVULK VMÄJL I\PSKPUN would turn out to be about at the side of the PeaCock Theatre was actually offered to the LSE to see if they wanted to site their new extreme rendition chambers, the new term for classrooms devoted to indoctrinating students with LSE100. After the LSE reportedly assumed that the offer was a joke, the Poly’s administration swept in to claim [OL KLJYLWP[ VMÄJL ZWHJL PU a failed attempt at establishing more living space. In reality, what the administration thought was a

as real as Sheikh Zayed’s alleged belief in the Holocaust, turned out to be the real deal. We here at the Son HYLÅH[[LYLK[OH[VULVMV\Y many devious ways of getting the story has reached such magnitude. And we apologise for any misunderstanding caused. One high ranking LSE source has stated “the issue was twofold, not only is the building about as

SON THEATRE:

Cowed Atlas LANA and Andy Vardaxoglou’s half-baked adaption of Tinned Dick’s 2006 novel is the equivalent of a mad woman ranting her biography at you in a car park. Or her shrieking at you in Zoo that she has lost her cardigan. ;OL ÄST ^PSS JVTL HZ H massive disappointment to fans of the novel, not least because of the Vardaxoglou Brothers’ inexplicable decision to tell the story chronologically, rather than the interconnected thematic structure that made the original novel such a rollercoaster read. As a result of this, despite Jockie Chen’s best efforts, we never really feel like we know the similarities IL[^LLU [OL ÄST»Z ]HYPV\Z characters, all of whom are reincarnations of the same spirit throughout a centuries timeframe. What the ÄSTILJHTL^HZLZZLU[PHSS` a series of ever increasingly IPaHYYL ZOVY[ ÄSTZ [OH[ [OPZ

particular editor felt would have been more suited to pipe through into the rooms of the UKBA. Therefore, it is hard to connect Snr. Juan King battle to prevent the Spanish Inquisition and the evil Cardinal Pedro-Dia from massacring the innocents with that of Sir Jason de Hand-Shandy attempts to rescue the Hayekian tribe from Lord Yoshi’s East India Company mercenaries. Dame Edna Average works hard to bring out the drunken rantings of the German Dictator as he narrowly survives Count von Zeigerradlermaß’s assassination attempt, but it all JVTLZHJYVZZHZYH[OLYÅH[ 7LYOHWZ^P[OTVYLÅLZOVU [OL IVULZ [OPZ ÄST TPNO[ have succeeded, but much like a newspaper stall on Houghton Street, it was doomed to failure. Narrative aside, a number of inexplicable changes to the plot also act to

[OL KL[YPTLU[ VM [OL ÄST»Z structure. One of the novel’s most moving strands, in which Governor Wanke sends the National Guard into Little Rock, is cut entirely, replaced by a pointless take on the American Civil War, in which Senator Alwyn Skud goes around and accuses everyone of being racist. The modern day scenes in which Jay Selbstbefriedigung establishes Stonewall is retained, although it is undone by a hackneyed plot line in which Putin-Day, Melany Filips and Baroness Yeung set out to destroy his crusade, starting by a bombing campaign on the public conveniences of London. Haille Barry’s in it though, so at least it isn’t racist. Unless you’re Alwyn Skud.

THREE OUT OF SEVEN

structurally sound as the East Building, but also that it just seemed like a prank. Who would think that we needed more classrooms for LSE100? The fucking Grundian?” This source went on to reveal that “we basically think it’s Dick Trainer being a little pussy about heading up an inferior institution to the LSE. He can’t handle the Commissar. You know why

they can put all their famous people on the front of their buildings? Because they have about 40. Big fucking deal.” Plans for a ‘security fence’ being erected are in their formative stages at present, however there has been an increasing clamour from all sections of the student body, almost universally annoyed that they now have to deal with slack-jawed Poly’s students wandering down Houghton Street. The Commissar has even been quoted as saying that “although my world-leading research into Anthropology has taught me the idea that we are supposed to embrace the idea of ‘the other,’ I have to admit that those Poly students are the lowest form of Canadian, they’re nearly as bad as the Tea Party.” The Son expects some ZVY[ VM HMÄYTH[P]L HJ[PVU within the week.


24

19.03.2013 | SATIRE

LSE TROT

TRUMPS IN what has been seen by many correspondents as a desperate attempt by the LSESU to plug the funding gap as a result of the SU shop ceasing to sell the Son the Studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Union intends to commission and sell packs of â&#x20AC;&#x153;SU Cardsâ&#x20AC;? for students to collect, trade and battle with their studying companions. The Son has taken the liberty of hacking the server of the LSESU computer by correctly guessing the password of the computer as â&#x20AC;&#x153;pa55wordâ&#x20AC;?. And can exclusively reveal that several of the cards may be seen as controversial by certain groups on campus. Highlights of the starter pack that we gained access included the bonus card of Saif Qzh/G/ÂŁ/ha-aa-daff(ydHuck) PPHUKVY`ÂťZĂ&#x201E;UNLYZHU\U\Z\HSHKKP[PVU given that theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re almost unconnected to any of the work that was meant to be handed into the university by him whatsoever.

Plans are being mooted for there to be several additional packs for students to buy along with the possibility of a fully Ă&#x2026;LKNLKIVHYKNHTLHUKVYH;=ZLYPLZ to follow. One such idea was the â&#x20AC;&#x153;Donations packâ&#x20AC;?, where any individual or institution who has donated enough money to the school will be included along ^P[OHĂ&#x2026;H[[LYPUNWYLZZYLSLHZLHIV\[OV^ their Holocaust denial was merely just misrepresentation by the British media. For large donors other than Sheikh â&#x20AC;&#x153;Rattle and Rollâ&#x20AC;? Zayed, such as the Greek National Bank of â&#x20AC;&#x153;South Cyprus is Best Cyprus,â&#x20AC;? a small royalty may be paid back through the currency of unsold SU shop items. A single folder was unable to be opened, however. Named the â&#x20AC;&#x153;hashtagbanter hashtagcontroversy hashtagracialslursâ&#x20AC;? folder we can only assume the cards ready to be played here might raise eyebrows. And have people running to their lawyers.


The Beaver 19.03.2013

25

PartB Hâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹYH DOO JLYHQ HYHU\ ŕŽ&#x160;EUH RI RXU VRXO WR /6( LQ W our time here. Here are a couple of lists about the knowledge and pleasure LSE has given me in re-

WXUQ $OLVWRIIDFWV,KDYHOHDUQWLQP\WLPHDW/6(%RWK of Piers Morganâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fathers are black. The earliest discovered drum-kit was found in Tutankhamunâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tomb. Craig Calhoun has twice been spotted moonwalking in his office. In New Zealand, prisoners are known to snort lines of bicarbonate of soda then drink a cup of YLQHJDU WR DOOHYLDWH ERUHGRP +LWOHUâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV IDYRXULWH ŕŽ&#x160;OP was â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;The Sound of Musicâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. David Beckhamâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Bend it Like Beckhamâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. A bird in the hand is actually worth three in the bush. In Spain taxidermy is a competitive sport. Vets are working on a method of extracting the eight spare lives of cats into a tradable market scheme similar to carbon credits. The new Pope is 40 per cent horsemeat. $OLVWRIEDQGV,KDYHOLVWHQHGWRDW/6(7KH*UDSHIUXLW Dead. Buena Vista Social Club Sandwich. Prosecco and the Bunnymen. Egg Sheran. Bjorkshire Pudding. Fetallica. Radioheadible panties. PâtĂŠ Smith. Lincoln Pork. Beetroots Manuva. Wu Tangfastics Clan. Tina Turnip. Steve Reich and Peas. Death Cab Clafouti. Paella Fitzgerald. Ladysmith Black Samosa. Notorious BLT. Dizzee RasCalamari. Lee â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Scratchâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Perrins. 0RXVVH 6SULQJVWHHQ /HPRQ &XUGâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹLV 0D\ŕŽ&#x160;HOG 9LQ daLouie Armstrong. Enrique Iglazeddonut. Franz FerdiNandos. Hula Hoop Bashmore. Dim Sum 41. Will.i.ham. Aphex Twix. Quorn Direction. Grand Master Flan. Bun UFO. Totally Enormous Turkey Dinosaurs.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; Yeah. None of that is true.

A note from our departing editors W

ell, what can I say? I was asked to be the Video Games editor while I was drinking in the Tuns. I thought itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d be a laugh, and a way to write articles without having to reverse my apolitical views, lack of perspective and allergic relationship with extra work. For those whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re leaving with me, I hope we all run into each other down the road of life; Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m pretty sure at least 5 of you still owe me a drink.

-Philip Gallagher

-Emir Nader

Y

ou walk past a cafe, but you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t eat when youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve lived too long.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; - David Bowie :KDWD\HDU$V)RRG(GLWRUIRU,â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹYHEHHQDŕŽ&#x2030;RUGHG an invaluable opportunity to strike a rapport with similarly minded food enthusiasts, research the latest openings and launches and utilise my existing PR contacts as a platform for generating leads for all things food-related. In turn, fellow students have dined at some of the most reputablehaunts and attended an extensive array of events in Central London, successfully celebrating gluttony in all its glory. This has resulted in a dynamic food section for PartB this past year, having focused largely on some of the hottest openings to hit our fair city in recent months. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll certainly miss the role and how it enriched what I love indulging in PRVWRQHRIWKHŕŽ&#x160;QHVWSOHDVXUHVLQOLIHIRRG,VLQFHUHO\ hope that next yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s editor will make use of the new conWDFWV,â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹYHPDGHDQGWKHSUHVVOLVWVWKDW7KH%HDYHUQRZŕŽ&#x160;QGV itself on, which largely provide intricate details of new openings, dining concepts and launch events. The highlights? Mari Vanna, Gailâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Kitchen and The Delaunay Counter. Thank you all for making PartB what it is.

-Laura Randle

uring my time as The Beaverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Theatre Editor, I have D seen many things; most memorable are the several murders (various), Oscar Wilde (In Extremis), and a

baby being stoned to death (Saved). As a last comment though, I would like to share some reoccurring thoughts that were with me every time I sat down to see a show. That is, the similarities that can be drawn between the theatre, and football. This brief note is intended to be a kind of guide to Theatreland for football fans, and at the same time a guide to football for theatregoers. 1. The pitch is the stage. 2. Players are actors. Playing in a certain position is akin to portraying a particular character. 3. The Coach is the Director. 4. In training, set pieces are rehearsed much like actors rehearse scenes. 5. Half-time is used to give the players a rest, it is also an opportunity for the Coach to pass on some instrucWLRQVLQOLJKWRIWKHŕŽ&#x160;UVWPLQXWHV'XULQJWKHLQWHUYDO actors take a break and the Director is on hand to pass on advice. 6. Often, substitutes are made after half-time in an attempt to maintain, or change, the score line. Playwrights regularly introduce new characters after the interval to freshen up the performance. Shakespeareâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Poor Tom was a seventeenth century â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;impact subâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. Hopefully the connection is clear from so few lines, and I would like to close by saying that if you understand one, then you understand the other.

-Laurence Vardaxoglou


26

PartB

JOSH JINRUANG JANIE TAN partb@thebeaveronline.co.uk

Fashion

LSESU FASHION SOCIETY fashion@thebeaveronline.co.uk

Film

KOKO OWUSU

ஊOP#WKHEHDYHURQOLQHFRXN

Food

LAURA RANDLE

THE CURIOUS INCIDENT OF THE DOG IN THE NIGHT-TIME  APOLLO THEATRE Based on the book by Mark Haddon

food@thebeaveronline.co.uk

Adapted by Simon Stephens

Literature

Directed by Marianne Elliott

RACHEL WILLIAMS

literature@thebeaveronline.co.uk

Music

TOM BARNES EMIR NADER

PXVLF#WKHEHDYHURQOLQHFRXN

Private B

GINGER WHOREBY

privateb@thebeaveronline.co.uk

Technology MIKE PEARSON

technology@thebeaveronline.co.uk

Theatre LAURENCE VARDAXOGLOU

theatre@thebeaveronline.co.uk

Video Games PHILIP GALLAGHER

YLGHRJDPHV#WKHEHDYHURQOLQHFRXN

Visual Arts ERIKA ARNOLD

visualarts@thebeaveronline.co.uk

PartB Editorial column is colonised by Theatre violet this week, courtesy of the Laurence Vardaxoglou. PartB put on a token resistance before coyly giving in.

B.

Starring Luke Treadaway

M

ost of those who have read Mark Haddon’s best-selling novel will agree that it is not an obvious contender for a stage adaptation, moreover they might also agree that it be added to the list of books which should never be adapted from their literary form. Simon Stephens has achieved something nothing short of phenomenal, then, in transferring all the complexities of characters, concepts and relationships from the book to the stage—and doing so with enormous flair, enjoying a completeness that the novel, due to its form, cannot access. The story centres around teenager Christopher (Luke Treadaway), whose autism makes him a maths genius with an acute attention to detail, an inability to lie and a severe difficulty in forming and upholding relationships with those around him. Presented as a school play—though not obvious until well into the second act—the near three hours show is cleverly narrated by Christopher; he tells the story of his determination to discover the cause of death of his neighbour’s dog, whilst uncovering truths about his family, and himself along the way. The cast is beautifully cohesive, led by the remarkable Treadaway, it is rare to watch an actor and be so captivated by the performance that you struggle to imagine them as anyone else; this is the level of believability that Treadaway reaches in creating a Christopher so perfect that he could not disappoint even the most avid fan of Haddon’s novel. His physical control is commendable, as is the attention to detail, such as a stiff left hand whilst the right continually twists the cord of his sweater. Facial expressions show deep levels of concentration, as well as creating an air of superiority with a lifted chin and raised eyebrows. Treadaway spits out words with certainty, and creates subtle alterations where certainty is more questionable. Anxiety and nervousness are shown honestly and authentically, whilst the rum-

bling groans of Christopher’s frustration are so sensitively portrayed that there is not even an ounce of caricature. Everything about Treadaway’s performance is nothing short of perfect. Sean Gleeson’s tender performance as Ed, Christopher’s father, must also be applauded for showing an intense love for Christopher without the need for explicit references. The relationship between Christopher and his father develops as the play goes on and truly stands out. The set helps to give the audience a better grasp of Christopher’s mind, as well as providing the cohesion that is so apparent between the cast —actors not involved in some scenes step away to become part of the scenery. Upon entering the theatre, the audience is met by a simple box set—black, and made to look like graph paper. It is empty, other than a number of large white cubes, whose purpose is initially unknown. Later, these cubes are used innovatively to create locations and day to day items by the cast. The box is versatile yet clinical. Married with LEDs at each grid intersection, it is used to create scenes of streets, a night sky, a remarkable escalator and a train journey. In use throughout the play is a large train set which can be seen as reference to Christopher’s own journey to London. This train set becomes hypnotic as Christopher’s fixation on playing with it blocks his past experiences of parental bad faith. Music cleverly intensifies both feelings of distress and anxiety, as well as feelings of calm and pain; it is used to great effect in distinguishing the play’s two locations, Swindon and London. Every aspect of this production has a purpose. Nothing is out of place. Nothing is an add-on. In The Curious Incident of The Dog in The Night-Time the creative team has created something very special, choosing simple techniques such as lighting gobos, projections, a box set, simplistic costume, and repetitive music to accompany an impeccable cast. The real triumph here is the power of these non-acting elements to tell parts of the story on a stand-alone basis—were it not for the graph paper set we might not notice the precision with which Christopher lays out his train set. Were it not for the bombardment of text projections we might not notice how daunting a station is for Christopher. Director Marianne Elliott has used the

APOLLO THEATRE

B.YOND HERE LIES ANYTHING

19.03.2013 PartB

stage to give Christopher’s internal responses to the world a powerful external manifestation. This is not a play about a dog, nor an incident, and despite the novel being heralded as the most important insight into the autistic spectrum of contemporary times, it is not about Special Educational Needs. It is an incomparable, beautiful and at times uncomfortable facilitation of difference, the nature of truth, the relationships we have with, and the understanding we have of, each other. Christo-

pher’s story, brought to life exceptionally by Treadaway, is one that cannot help but lay heavy on the audience members’ minds; it forces each individual to question their presentation of themselves, and their own abilities. This is summed up in Christopher’s final, unanswered, question: ‘can I do anything?’

Michelle Warbis

THE POLITICAL PARTY

WITH MATT FORDE M

att Forde, a former Labour employee turned stand-up, invites us to join him for an evening of political satire hosted in a relaxed cabaret set up. The premise is simple, half an hour of standup followed by an interview with a well-known, though sometimes controversial, politician. (One of the past guests includes George Galloway.) A quick glance at the rest of the audience shows that it is not your usual comedy goer in attendance: most were in their forties, Whitehall types. Feeling like an anomaly to begin with I was relieved that once the night began the comedy was engaging for anyone with a mild interest in the subject matter, regardless of age or occupation. The first section played out like a one man Have I Got News For You without the tired panel format. Using his sharp wit and knowledge of the inner workings of Westminster, Matt Forde set about deconstructing the news of the past few weeks. On the subject of the recent Lib Dem conference, Forde does a rather good (and refreshingly obscure) impression of Jo Swinson’s speech, focusing in particular on her apology over the recent Lord Rennard scandal. The highlight of the section was definitely the anecdote about his failed attempt to get Dennis Skinner (one of his childhood heroes) to be a guest on the show—there was, apparently, a heartbreakingly funny phone exchange that ended with Skinner exclaim-

ing, “you will never meet me!” before hanging up. The guest for the second section was the former Home Secretary Charles Clarke. Clarke is often remembered for his support for ID cards, introducing top up fees and his role as advisor to Neil Kinnock. Forde made for a competent interviewer, asking a range of questions on a range of the issues from Clarke’s time in politics. Clarke gave very blunt opinions of many of his contemporaries, including Tony Benn—“anyone who lives long enough becomes a national treasure”—and Gordon Brown. It was genuinely interesting to hear his view on what he perceived to be the failings and successes of his government. One criticism, however, is that Forde’s own Blairite allegiances betrayed him slightly as he failed to press on more controversial issues, such as Clarke’s support, at the time and in hindsight, of the Iraq War. This issue ought not dissuade anyone from attending what is without doubt an enjoyable evening. I would look out for the return show in June which will see Jack Straw as Forde’s special guest.

 Michael Owens

ST JAMES THEATRE Next on 17 April 2013


27

The Beaver 19.03.2013

EDWARD BURTYNSKY/COURTESY NICHOLAS METIVIER GALLERY, TORONTO/FLOWERS LONDON

THE PLAY

THAT GOES

WRONG

series of mishaps that contribute in some way to the plot or a larger joke overall. When the door is swung open to knock Sandra (Lotti Maddox) unconscious, there is a reason for this, it is not only for the sake of a few laughs—this would be cheap, and Mischief are anything but. The simultaneous plot lines of the drama society as well as Murder at Haversham Manor, though clean, could have been used to greater effect. The characters of the drama society members did seep through in parts, but it was patchy at best. The drama troupe’s failures are made more engaging by a familiarity with the characters. For example the audience learns that Chris is a fairly competent actor left reeling by the inability of his peers, and this makes an extended exchange with Dennis, who is reading the stage direction ‘exit’ aloud, even funnier. The following line is tossed back and forth between the pair before Chris makes his point made by emphasising the final word: ‘if you need me, I’ll be in my quarters. Exit.’ For such a talented cast, whose members on the whole have graduated from LAMDA, I should imagine that to throw out the rule book and act poorly on purpose is harder than it sounds. Hopefully there will not be any unwanted side effects on show in Mischief’s next production which, if The Play That Goes Wrong is anything to go by, will certainly be worth seeing. Without doubt, The Play That Goes Wrong is currently the best worst show in town.

Laurence Vardaxoglou

 OLD RED LION THEATRE Written by Henry Lewis, Jonathan Sayer and Henry Shields Directed by Mark Bell Starring Henry Shields, Greg Tannahil, Henry Lewis, Jonathan Sayer, Dave Hearn, Nancy Wallinger and Lotti Maddox

Edward Burtynsky, Nickel Tailings No 34

DON'T THINK, LOOK!

I

t‘s harsh, it‘s brutal, yet also simply beautiful. That‘s landscape photography of the 21st century. Our rapidly changing planet—both its merciless realities, as well as enduring and stunning beauty—served as an inspi-

Berlin, or vast indoor Alpine ski areas protected from the unbearable heats in the middle of the Arabian desert. And still, a few remaining photographers reveal to us how nature tries to fight back by reclaiming urban spaces and fields abandoned by an ever-increasing human population. Don't Think, Look is a compelling exhibition— fearless, insightful, eyeopening and powerful.

forms, and many other ills trouble our minds on a daily basis. “Thinking in pictures,” Sigmund Freud once wrote, “stands nearer to unconscious processes than does thinking in words“. Photographers today perform an

1Erika Arnold

DANIEL BELTRA

C

ornley Polytechnic Drama Society are very excited to be putting on their most professional show to date, the thrilling whodunit, Murder at Haversham Manor. Proud society president, Chris (Henry Shields), explains that previous mishaps and limitations have seen a series of below-par productions including Checkov’s Two Sisters, The Lion and The Wardrobe, and Ugly and The Beast. This sets the tone for an evening of chaos, calamity, and ultimately lots and lots of laughter. The stage—a typical country house drawing room—is (not quite) set as the endearing but by no means competent members of Cornley’s Drama Society start to play out their murder mystery. There is, of course, a limited number of ways that these over-used affairs can pan out (as those who play Cluedo will know) and so it is testament to the skillful dramatists who make up Mischief Theatre that their stereotypes of characters (butler, inspector, jealous brother, unfaithful wife) entertain for the entire hour. The premise of the play is in the title, and The Play That Goes Wrong’s charm can be found in the varying ways in which the characters react when things do happen to go wrong. It would be unwise to think too deeply about it, but it is nonetheless interesting to ask what should an actor do when lines are forgotten, props are not in place and the set is not working? Skip the lines? Ignore the props? Walk out altogether? The answer here is all three—and more. At the center of the pandemonium that is the first scene is Cornley player Jonathan (Henry Lewis), who is collapsed on a chaise-long playing dead as Mr Haversham. Chris, in his role as the inspector, is circling the room and Dennis (Jonathan Sayer) plays the hapless butler who proceeds to step on Jonathan’s outstretched hand before crashing a silver tray onto his head. The dead man reacts as any living one would—the play has already gone very wrong, but this is just the tip of an iceberg inscribed with ‘WRONG’ across it in very large letters. There are gags aplenty in a slapstick style that is made successful by the obvious thought and planning gone into devising the piece, the group is rewarded (albeit in laughter) for embedding a

Daniel Beltra, Oil Spill, 2010. Aerial view of oil leaking from the Deepwater Horizon wellhead in the Gulf of Mexicochippendale

ration for more than 70 of the world‘s most regarded photographers who produced works of outstanding artistic and emotional quality. Showcased at Somerset House the exhibition is free of charge, nonetheless utterly rewarding. None other than William A. Ewing, who has been behind some of the world‘s most celebrated photography showings, curated a thrilling ensemble of snow-covered mountains, frighteningly complex industrial parks, tossing oceanic waves and monotonic urban landscapes—a portfolio of evolution, prosperousness, destruction and decay. The genre of landscape has always occupied a central place in photography, but is now more relevant than ever. Today the environment is at the heart of everyone’s concerns: rising sea levels, desertification, deforestation, the melting Poles and retreating glaciers, extinction of species on land and in sea, pollution of myriad

absolutely vital role in drawing our attention to the relationship between humanity and its habitat in insightful and eloquent ways. From straightforward, even brutal photographic documents, through pithy and ironic commentaries, to poetic and enigmatic visions—the photographers of the Landmark exhibition trekked deep into the Arctic with cumbersome 19th-century plate cameras or sent drones with 21stcentury electronic equipment into the skies over China and Afghanistan. A number of photographs show us the last remaining traces of pristine nature, calling our attention to the many ways we thoughtlessly destroy the environment in our quest of material progress; others show us the polluted Mother Earth, scarred and overburdened. Certain pictures focus on the often grotesque attempts at creating ‘new‘ Edenic spots, like ‘the World‘s Biggest Indoor Tropical Forest‘ near

Nadav Kander, Chongqing I Chongqing Municipality

Landmark: The Fields of Photography Somerset House until 28 April 2013 Free Admission


28

19.03.2013 PartB

I Think, Therefore I Jam: the performers

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spread of creativity on campus: â&#x20AC;&#x153;I love spoken word because of its almost painful sincerity and how that forces you to reassess who you are or want to be. There doesn't seem to be a scene at LSE, I think there's something about this uni that makes you less open or feel a bit ridiculous for being open, so I guess that warps how we engage and what we can create...In my mind the event is a celebration of performance and the power of creativity.â&#x20AC;? With such a positive response from students, organisers Rachel, Kirsty and Michelle hope to make â&#x20AC;&#x153;I Think Therefore I Jamâ&#x20AC;? a regular occurrence at the LSE. Watch this space.

rom the dank crevaces of the LSE campus crawl literature fanatics, writers and bloggers and poets and musicians alike. Huddled together in the warmth of tea-lights in the Parish Hall they present their spiels, pleasantly surprised to find far more than a handful of others at the university who share their enthusiasm; the motivation to write and perform. It is Friday 15th March and seeking solace from the end-of-term exhaustion, the â&#x20AC;&#x153;I Think Therefore I Jamâ&#x20AC;? showcase offers a rich selection to inspire: from a dramatic reading of Rihannaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;S and Mâ&#x20AC;? to â&#x20AC;&#x153;Inside Timeâ&#x20AC;? poems written by prison inmates; from an extract of Gibranâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Prophetâ&#x20AC;? to romantic laments and original poetry-slam pieces.

â&#x20AC;&#x153;A few friends and I had begun writing pieces and sharing them in The Three Tunsâ&#x20AC;? says Rachel Williams, the mother of the showcase baby, â&#x20AC;&#x153;it was great. We could share ideas, receive criticism and create pieces together. I knew there were many others under the radar at LSE who loved to write but never really had the opportunity to share and listen to others. My friend Emma [Brassington] encouraged me to get my act together and the response was brilliant. It was with the invaluable help of Kirsty Kenney, president of LSESU Album Club, which helped the showcase to burgeon.â&#x20AC;? Michelle Kalu, presenter of â&#x20AC;&#x153;Into the Spaceâ&#x20AC;? spoken word show on Pulse Radio expressed her thoughts about spoken word and the

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"There's something about this uni that makes you less open or feel a bit ridiculous for being open, so I guess that warps how we engage and what we can create''

Madeline D. Roberts

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n Oscar Wilde's novel The Picture of Dorian Gray, the epomymous protagonist is a twenty year old man at the prime of his youth. Imbued with the most valuable gifts the gods ever confer upon a mortal soulâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;material wealth, physical beauty, aristocratic bloodlineâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;the young adonis lives a life of carefree leisure. He drifts from one society's gathering to the next, directed by no discernible purpose, driven by no particular passion, and weighed down by no meaningful relationship. And why then should he not? Instead of receiving contempt, as would be the case in nowadays' taskobsessed society, the young man is welcomed with open arms anywhere he goes. He seems to possess some kind of precious treasure, one so precious that even its possession escapes its owner's mind. What Dorian has is given to all of us in abundance at the moment of our birth, but gradually diminished by the ruthless ravage of time. Such is Youth, with it terrific bloom and inevitable decline. In some ways, it is like Life, ephemereal and limited, only more cruel as its end lacks the cathartic suddenness that Death mercifully provides. The degeneration is slow and

drawn out, with precision comparable only to deliberate torture. No doubt, this is worsened by our modern society in which the idealised image of physical beauty bombards one wherever he goes. Advertisements, magazines, reality shows, with their conspiratorial smirks, show us that to be young is to be, period, and any existence aside from that is hardly worthy of attention, let alone representation. The sexual aspect of life, too, is dominated by this doctrine of youth. Simply turn on gay hookup appli-

cation Grindr and you will see; half the men is shirtless, with their perfectly sculpted muscles bursting through the screen's confine. And the other half? Old men looking for young lads, vicariously living through them in the hopeless quest to recapture that tiny spark of youth, one they had along ago but is now irrevocably lostâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;infinite Oscar Wildes staring in awe of infinite Bosies, all within the flashing screen of a smartphone. In the face of this inevitability, many lost souls turn to the solace of pleasure. Its sweet binding spell hypnotises one into a state of temporary bliss, a false paradise where one transcends the self-consious limitedness of existence, even if for short while. Whether this takes a form of sex, music, or substance, the solution is simply unsustainable. The quest for the edge of ultimate sensory experience will achieve just that: reaching the edgeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; instead of transcendence what one will find there is a wall, strong and impenetrable. Dorian Gray was hardly the first nor the only man

encountering such unsurpassable obstacle. And yet, there is consolation. In his lesser-read work The Soul of Man Under Socialism, Wilde proposes selfrealisation instead of gratification as the only source of a meaningful life. One achieves not only one's own Individualisation, and the joyous sense of freedom derived, but also contributes to humanity as a whole. While Wilde's suggestion of socialism as a political system that would enable such a utopia, in hindsight, reeks of optimistic naivete, his critique of capitalismâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; a system in which one is forced to pour too much of one's creative energy into an acquisition of private property, and in which a man, as he is, is confused with his possesionsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;remains a compelling one. What, then, do we do? Perhaps the answer is best left to the pragmatists of our time. The artist has fulfilled his duty: he painted a beautiful lie and pointed the way.

Josh Jinruang


29

The Beaver 19.03.2013

LSEX

5 ARTISTS TO LOOK FORWARD TO AT

HIDEOUT

goal is to lull you into a false sense of romantic complacency and then yank the rug right out from under you so they can laugh at your naïveté. To avoid this tragic pratfall of a fate, you must stay one step a head of their deceitful “romantic gestures.” What follows is a guide to Defensive Dating, the skillful art of mentally nullifying all potential happiness so you never fall victim to its evil machinations. The first rule is to trust no one, including yourself. Emotions, like love interests, are only there to confuse you. They will try to convince you that this time it might be different, or that maybe you actually like this guy. This is a trap. Always ignore such suggestions. When someone asks you out, assume they are doing it for a bet, a la She’s All That. Respond sarcastically, so your interest remains ambiguous at best. Lines like “Gee Whiz, that sure sounds swell” and “I mean, I guess if you’re forcing me…” will do the trick. Remember, nothing has ever worked out in the past, which is proof that nothing ever will. Do not allow optimism to convince you otherwise. While on a date, never reveal your true self. Instead present a completely unrealistic and unsustainable identity where you are funny, intelligent, interesting, kind, confident and charming every single moment. If you ever feel unable to maintain the façade, cancel the date immediately citing a “family emergency”. Be sure to tally how many imagined relatives you’ve killed off to prevent being caught in a lie. Invent activities that make you seem even more perfect, like volunteering for a charity or visiting an art gallery you’ve overheard cultured people talk about. Act surprised and condescending when he admits that he prefers to just sit at

“Thanks, me too.” When he texts you, convincze yourself that responding too soon makes you look desperate. Respond a few days later, with a strange text message about pumpkin seeds that makes no sense but that you think is clever. When he responds “LOL”, assume he means that sarcastically and decide that it is his responsibility to initiate all future communication to prove he is still interested. When he initiates another date, begin to dismiss him because anyone who doesn’t think you’re crazy at this point must be crazy himself. Obsessively stalk his Facebook activity. Every time he friends someone, convince yourself that this must be a romantic competitor. Check his photos every day to make sure no images of him and the new friend exist. When one inevitably pops up, write a vaguely jealous comment like “Oh, this is interesting.” Or “Wish I’d been there.” Don’t forget the smiley face to create the false possibility that you might be joking, even though what you said clearly bears no resemblance to any joke ever told. Continue this game of emotional guardedness until you crack under the pressure and start vomiting truth all over him. Tell him you really like him, that you want to be exclusive, that you were lying when you said you wanted to keep things casual and you’ve never done a charitable thing in your life. Watch him recoil at your abrupt about-face and act like he has no idea who you are. Listen to him tell you that he needs some time to think. Never hear from him again. Pat yourself on the back. This relationship, like all previous relationships, has flatlined, like you knew it would all along. Feel satisfied that you were right. Congratulations, dater, you’ve won again.

right up close to a DJ who is sure to take off very soon, where smaller gigs from him will no doubt soon be a rarity. It’s a bit pointless to pick at top-5 for Hideout. The line-up is utterly jammed full of names you’d want to catch: Jackmaster, Pearson Sound, Mosca, Joy O, Move D, Will Saul, Eats Everything, Justin Martin, Bicep, Skream & Benga, Redlight, John Talabot, the list quite literally goes on and on. What strikes you most though is the diversity of artists on offer at Hideout. For those more bassinclined Pendulum, and Chase & Status are making appearances, for D&B-heads there’s Andy C and Netsky, or for something more techno-orientated you can opt for Will Saul or Heidi. Reading like a who’s who of dance music, the Hideout line-up this year stands head and shoulders above Outlook, Dimensions and Soundwave. Don’t let the fact the festival is sold out stop you (I should have probably told you that earlier); a quick look on Gumtree or the RA Hideout event page has sellers looking for a quick trade. The festival organisers are keen to maintain Hideout’s reputation by capping the number of tickets to 10,000. If you do manage to get your hands on some tickets it will be worth every penny. At a time when Croatian music festivals are becoming increasingly popular (Hideout, The Warehouse Project and Field Day have revealed yet another one in the form of Unknown Festival starting this summer), it’s worth trying to experience Croatian music festivals before they succumb to inevitable pressures of popularity.

ƉTom Barnes

CASTORP REPUBLIC

A

FESTIVAL 2013

frequently headlining events. SBTRKT’S song-like approach to writing his own material makes it more audience-friendly. With often-impressive visuals to match incredible music, the masked-man is one DJ set you absolutely don’t want to miss. At number two is Four Tet, providing a welcome contrast to a lot on the Hideout line-up. Coming from a much more experimental origin in electronic music, Four Tet’s gradual evolution towards dance music has been received extremely well. Kieran Hebden approaches his music from a purely artistic point of view: “I use computers to make human music; music that connects to people and provokes real experiences and emotions. That’s it in a nutshell.” It’s for this reason that Four Tet would make up a unique and refreshing part of the Hideout experience. Drawing influence from everything from free jazz to gamelan music, resulting in a sound somewhere in-between Burial, Gold Panda and Bonobo, Four Tet takes a step back from some of the more intense acts at Hideout 2013 down a much more emotive and ambient road. So finally, the number one spot goes to… Ben Pearce! “Who?” I hear you say. Only emerging in the past of couple years as a prominent DJ and producer, you shouldn’t let the font-size of Ben Pearce’s name on the line-up put you off. His huge hit ‘What I Might Do’, dropped last year, has cemented him as a leading figure on the UK deep house scene. Supported by industry heavyweights such as Jamie Jones, Annie Mac and Seth Troxler himself and landing the role of creative director of the Purp & Soul imprint, the Manchester native is going from strength to strength. Hideout then is the perfect opportunity to get

fter several years of dating, one thing becomes clear: happiness is impossible and disappointment is inevitable. Anyone who tells you otherwise is merely trying to get you to adopt an ineffective life strategy so they can aggressively pursue their own happily-ever-after at your direct expense. If you are not feeling perpetually miserable, confused and insecure, you are either delusional or dead. As all seasoned daters know, most people’s singular

home playing board games, even though that’s exactly what you want to do. Remember, any glimpse of the real you not only invites for him to dump you for being human, but it also invalidates your chance to pretend that you don’t care that it didn’t work out because he never got to know the real you anyways. When he kisses you, smiles and says he had a great time, immediately construct a list of ulterior motives he probably has. Likely possibilities include: professional con-man, trying to steal your identity, trying to get with your hot roommate (who, as far as you know, he’s never met but who can know for sure), host of a new prank show, escaped mental patient. As such, refuse to return the kind words, and instead grumble something that sounds distantly like

Josh Ellman presents: How to Succeed in Romance Without Really Trying

HIDEOUT FESTIVAL

H

aven’t made summer plans yet? Hideout Festival 2013 has got you covered. Set on the stunning Zcre Beach, Croatia, the festival boasts a mind-blowing lineup some of the biggest names and DJ’s in dance music alongside beautiful scenery. For any die-hard electronic music fan choosing you favourite acts from such a good line-up is a bit like being forced to choose between your children (if you have any). So The Beaver is here to do it for you, and will guide you through the top five not-to-miss gigs at Hideout 2013. Starting us off in fifth place is Seth Troxler. Both producer and performer Troxler has in recent years ascended to DJroyalty by topping the 2012 Resident Advisor’s Top 100 DJs Poll as well as winning the Amsterdam Dance Event DJ CookOff for the past two years. Despite pulling bigger and bigger gigs, Troxler has maintained his underground flavour in the face of so much success. Even if you don’t go along for his music, he’s still an entertaining enough personality—just watch any interview with him on YouTube. Despite being one of the biggest names on the bill, Troxler even says himself he’d rather put on ‘large, spiritual events rather than just having raves and festivals, which are kind of bullshit at the moment.’ Certainly Seth is still a breath of fresh air in what’s becoming an increasingly popular scene. Our fourth not-to-miss artist is Bristolian Julio Bashmore, primarily because it would be a bit rude to leave him out. With his viral 2012 hit ‘Au Seve’ now plaguing student accommodation up and down the country, Bashmore’s gig is sure to be massive. Having already set up his own label Broadwalk Records and been gifted a BBC Radio 1 show, there is little stopping the man-of-the-moment. As a leading proponent of the recent-ish explosion in house popularity, his Hideout gig will most certainly be a safe bet. Yeah, you might be surrounded by a few douchebags, but you should probably just pipe-down and go along and have fun. The number three spot goes to SBTRKT (aka Aaron Jerome). Heading in a more experimental direction, SBTRKT has been churning out a hell of a lot of good music as of the past few years and now is seen


30

19.03.2013 PartB

BIRD'S EYE VIEW FILM FESTIVAL 2013:

THE MATCH FACTORY

ARAB WOMEN FILMMAKERS

The eponymous protagonist of Wadjda challenges Saudi Arabian conservative tradition, which prohibits girls from riding bicycle deeming it dangerous for their 'virtue'.

T

he Bird’s Eye View Film Festival, an event first curated back in 2002 in an attempt to showcase films from the most upcoming and prospective female directors and writers, is this year held in celebration of Arab Women filmmakers. Whilst there is a stark

misrepresentation of female directors and writers within the film industry, the Bird’s Eye View Film Festival 2013 aims to coerce UK audiences to immerse themselves in this culturally exciting and rich world. Questioned about this year’s Bird’s Eye Film Festival,

the event’s Creative Director, Kate Gerova comments, “At a time when female Arab directors are making headlines at top international Film Festivals, we are thrilled to present this special programme and to represent women filmmakers from diverse backgrounds across the Middle East and North Africa”. Essentially, the fundamental and significant nature of this film festival is far greater than one may assume: for many of the directors and writers in this fresh line up, it will be their first opportunity to showcase their work from an Arab female perspective to a society heavily concerned and concentrated upon Western values and norms. With the shockingly marginal percentage of female directors and writers represented within the industry, in other words between the ranges of 10-15%, it is not surprising that the Bird’s Eye View Film Festival has grown to become “internationally renowned” and recognised for its niche. The organisation’s core emphasis and ambition to promote female directors and writers in this tough industry has drawn in a wide and diverse audience and even guest speakers, who are, of course, all female,

including actress Thandie Newton as well as musicians Kate Nash and Annie Lennox. Officially commencing on April 3, Bird’s Eye Film Festival is set to be a truly remarkable and inspiring experience. With the noteworthy feature screenings of current affair issues within the Middle East as well as short films and live musical performances of Middle Eastern inspired film scores VHH%XVKUDb(O7XUNOLYHVFRUH for The Adventures of Prince Achmed) the festival has certainly more than overcompensated in its level of talent readily available and the merging of a range of disciplines to create a truly unique event. Prior to all this, International Women’s Day (8 March) saw a preview screening of Haifaa Al Mansour’s “charming tale” Wadjda presented at the BFI Southbank. As the first feature film from a Saudi Arabian woman, it is safe to say that the Bird’s Eye Film Festival 2013 will simply reinforce and remind us that the feminist movement, irrespective of our geographical location in the world, is still very much a great part of our social and cultural zeitgeist, and will be for many years to come.

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 In Cinemas 26 July Director Malik Bendjelloul Editor Malik Bendjelloul, Bernard Winkler Cinematographer Camilla Skagerström Run time 86 minutes

T

ruth is stranger than fiction, and that is mainly because the truth is real. The bewildering narrative that underpins Searching for Sugar Man has existed in some form or another in almost all of us at some point in our lives: although we are just ourselves —boring, flawed, and generally unappreciated—we are of some value that is unconditional and deserving of attention. For most of us, we are satisfied when that value is found in the gaze of a loved one, or in the solace of an omni-benevolent God; for others (and these we consider the lucky ones), there are the cheers of adoring fans, the company of fame and a stamp on history. Sixto Rodriguez was in the unusual position of having the latter without knowing it. As the film opens to the spectacular scenery of Cape Town's coast, a haunting and

unfamiliar voice pays tribute to Sugar Man, a cocaine dealer from Detroit. As if there weren't enough cognitive dissonance already, a merry South African chimes in: 'that's how I got my nickname in the army—they couldn't pronounce Segerman, so they just called me Sugar'. So begins our education of the most unusual love between Rodriguez and South Africa. Nobody knows for certain how the first copy of Rodriguez's Cold Fact entered the country, but what is certain is the impact it had on the local white population. Bigger than the Rolling Stones and Elvis Presley, and a force for political change, he had unwittingly inspired a generation of musicians to voice their anti-establishment views. Cold Fact was banned by the government for its explicit references to drugs among other rebellious sentiments, and this too served the growing cult of personality that embodied the mysterious Rodriguez. It was in the face of a disappointing gig that Rodriguez finally committed suicide, we are told. How he did it was uncertain because nobody knew who he was, but the stories range from him shooting himself in the head to setting himself on fire. A superstar with no history except the tragedy of his death was intriguing enough to catch the attention of Craig Bartholomew, a South African journalist and Rodri-

guez fan. And it was this hunt for the truth was the catalyst for the fairytale that would eventually be uncovered. A tale of revolution and forgotten genius becomes a detective story. The album's cover encapsulates much of what intrigues the duo of Segerman and Bartholomew: there is a picture of a man with sunglasses and long black hair, sitting cross legged meditatively. There is no information about him except for that which comes from the lyrics and the record label. Walls spring up everywhere, however: the trail of the lyrics is fruitless, and following the money leads to shrugs from all parties involved, including an angry and slightly incoherent tirade from Clarence Avant, the head of the American record label that distributed Cold Fact. Finally, there is a streak of luck. Bartholomew notices the mention of Dearborn in one of the songs, and pinpoints its location: a suburb of Detroit, Michigan. Not long afterwords, Cold Fact's producer is reached, and the answers begin to flow. But what seems to be the end of the story, as Bartholomew himself puts it, is just the beginning of another far more important one. It is not worth the reader's while for me to go into it, as less is more in a review of a true story of this calibre. All I will say is that

STUDIO CANAL

SEARCHING FOR SUGAR MAN

it puts into bleak perspective the ideas of love that were noted at the beginning of this review. If you did not know that you were loved and recognised by millions, would it make your life any worse than if you did? Rodriguez will provide you with his answer, not only through sublime music, but through the unfolding of his

whole story. I have never seen any film four times in a week apart from this one, and I believe it because truth is indeed stranger than fiction. Because the truth is real, and in a beautiful reality lies hope. Watch it.

 Raaid Sahabde


31

The Beaver 19.03.2013

EVIL DEAD  In Cinemas 19 April Director Fede Alvarez Starring Jane Levey, Jessica Lucas and Shiloh Fernandez Run time 91 minutes

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GRADULTHOOD

"if you have a 'gay-friendly face'... that has the potential to market well to the gay community via the modelling agency, or can utilise your ethnic back ground to channel your way into employment, then these are seen as one of many ways to 'get-rich-quick' ''

I

am sure that most of us at this stage in our student careers have had the absolute pleasure of experiencing the pressure a job application process can accumulate. Whether you are seeking a highly sought after internship at the prestigious Goldmann Sachs or flipping burgers at McDonalds, at the end of the day it can be an overwhelmingly stressful experience. Gradulthood—that awkward ‘in-limbo’ stage between graduating and developing into a fully-fledged adult in the ‘real’ full time working world—follows three London-based graduate males who are unemployed and still looking. Whilst this may come across as a somewhat straightforward plotline, the manner in which this topic is tackled and delivered is highly relatable and, most importantly, funny. As a recent graduate gaining an impressive first class in his Philosophy and Psychology degree from Britain’s very own Durham University, director William Hall-Smith’s pilot episode of Gradulthood provides a great insight into the ins and outs of post-graduation sentiment from the perspective of, arguably, socially inept characters. The episode revolves around this idea that one must ‘think outside the box’ when attracting potential employ-

ers—think fake tan, headshots and poster sized CV’s and you have the perfect recipe for 'how not to get a job'. Indeed, as a nation we are somewhat naïve in believing that we live in a politically correct society, whereby everyone on a social, racial or even religious background is treated on equal merit or ground... to an extent. Positive discrimination, as posited by Ralph (Joseph Booton) in Gradulthood, is seen as the way forward in attaining a well-paid position within your desired career path. That is to say, if you have a 'gay-friendly face', as Owen (Will Hall-Smith) suggests to Tom (Benjamin Ireland), that has the potential to market well to the gay community via the modelling industry, or can utilise your ethnic background to channel your way into employment, then these are seen as one of many ways to 'get-richquick' all of which have dire, but hilarious, consequences. With candid opening shots of tower blocks reminiscent of East London’s stereotypically ‘hipster youth’ communities such as Shoreditch, (which is coincidentally an area surrounding another fitting this description and a filming location for Gradulthood) this low budget and independently produced series is clever, likeable

and innovative. Indeed, there is only a pilot episode to go by, but with funding from the right sources and the right creative expertise in place, this could have the potential to be just as successful as Channel 4’s hit sitcom The Inbetweeners. Gradulthood may seem like your regular satirical explorations of the lives of three seemingly adult men who have no clue how to govern themselves within the ‘social adult working world’. Yet this is ultimately the reality we face in society today and Hall-Smith has superbly highlighted the significant and poignant struggle of graduate students trying to get foothold upon the career ladder.

 Koko Owusu

 In Cinemas July 26 Director William Hall-Smith Starring Benjamin Ireland, William Hall-Smith, Joseph Booton and Rosie Holt Run time 16 minutes (Pilot)

TRISTAR PICTURES

NEAL KIRKE

E

vil Dead is Fede Alvarez’s reworking of the 1981 cult horror classic, The Evil Dead. Sam Raimi, who wrote and directed the first low-budget affair, has long-since expressed a desire for a remake and along with original star, Bruce Campbell has produced this new version. This is Alvarez’s very first feature film and it is not only an impressive collaboration with Raimi but a directorial triumph in its own right. Bloody, audacious and darkly funny, Evil Dead is a remake that will not be forgotten. The film follows five friends who travel to a remote cabin in the midst of a forest in order to help Mia (Jane Levy) overcome her drug addiction. She is joined by her brother David (Shiloh Fernandez), his girlfriend Natalie (Elizabeth Blackmore) and their childhood friends, Olivia (Jessica Lucas) and Eric (Lou Taylor Pucci). Unlike the original, the initial focus is on Mia’s struggle with addiction and the frayed relationship between the two siblings. We discover that David had failed to support his sister during the madness and eventual suicide of their mother and that the cabin was a former holiday destination for the family. Then, as Mia begins to exhibit strange symptoms, the others interpret them as signs of withdrawal and dismiss them accordingly. However, the group soon realise the severity of their predicament when teacher Eric reads aloud from a mysterious

(the often disappointing) CGI, and instead opts for gruesomely effective practical effects. The film takes bloodshed to a degree that is rarely seen in popular commercial releases and painfully graphic scenes, including one character sawing off her own arm with an electric knife, are gleefully revelled in. Motifs, like the original cabin and car, are reused and often given new significance, such as the familiar magnifying-glass necklace that is now given to Mia by her brother as a symbol of strong will. Similarly, Roque Baños’s score recycles themes from the original musical compositions to great effect, and the iconic and ominous ‘approaching through the woods’ camera-shot is also present. However, neither believability nor character development are generally celebrated facets within the genre since Alvarez’s creations do seem particularly wooden and illformed. With the exceptions of Mia (once in full-blown demonic possession), and hapless hippie Eric, and with the particular non-exception of permanently irrelevant Natalie, the characters in Evil Dead are at best, dull and at worst, positively unlikable. Though the drug rehabilitation subplot adds a certain newness to the story, it seems to be utilised only timidly, adding a few oddly sentimental moments which are immediately undermined by the overriding theme of raucous gore. In these areas, the film has mostly failed, but all can be forgiven: Evil Dead continues the tradition of a series of films which incorporate a healthy sense of irony and these hopelessly two-dimensional characters reside within a context of dauntless, spectacular, gleeful horror. It is impossible to criticise Evil Dead too damningly when it delivers so triumphantly on its mission to shock and entertain. Even its hyperbolic

book found in the cellar and unwittingly unleashes a demon that is hell-bent on the possession of human souls. Mia’s condition takes a turn for the sinister as panic and destruction unfolds. Contrary to the typical scepticism of film fanatics, who are stubbornly committed to originals and therefore shun all forms of remake, it seems to me that The Evil Dead has been reinterpreted in all the right ways. The new film is full of pitch-black comedy and gratuitous gore and never loses the sense of fun that is so evident in its predecessor. Despite its incomparably larger budget and new, sophisticated camera work, Evil Dead stays true to the rough-and-ready original by avoiding the use of

tagline, ‘The Most Terrifying Film You Will Ever Experience’, is surely not meant literally, intended only to promote the same indulgent love of horror that is depicted in the film itself. Evil Dead is memorable, absorbing and a great deal more witty and interesting than others in its meek sub-genre of ‘classic horror remakes’. It is sure to appeal to true horror fans in its ingenious use of real effects and its healthy injection of morbid comedy. These two elements are most concisely presented in the sinisterly slapstick ‘slip on the severed cheek’ moment and frankly, it is utterly fantastic.

 Elizabeth Sandell


32

19.03.2013 PartB

EYEING TOP SPOT: THE SAMSUNG GALAXY S4

CAN'T TAKE MY EYES OFF YOU

E

nter the era of touchscreen smartphones that, paradoxically, you don’t need to touch. The headline feature of the S4 is its ability to track and respond to your eye movements. If our eyes really are “The windows of our soul,” then we could perhaps be a little worried that a global technology maker is able to track every movement of our pupils. Let’s not worry for now though, as the ability to pause a video by simply taking your eyes off the screen would’ve seen like science-fiction just a few years ago. As well as “Smart Pause”, the S4 also in-

 31 Peter St W1F 0AR 020 7487 4688 Hours Lunch Mon-Fri 12 -3pm, Sat 12pm12am, Sun 12-9pm Dinner Mon 5:30-10pm Tues-Wed 5:30-11pm Thurs and Fri 5:30pm-12pm Sat 12pm–12am Sun 12–9pm Cuisine Japanese Average spend £30-40 for two with drinks Reservations No

N

ewly opened Bone Daddies is undeniably worth a visit. Located on Peter Street in Soho, it offers its guests a fabulous variety of Ramen dishes. The drinks menu also features some rather exciting choices; including interesting cocktails, teas, and a host of different types of Sake. The venue itself has a very ‘cool’ and ‘hip’ vibe to it, with interesting posters decorating its walls and rock music playing in the background. Even the choice of table decorations was interesting—jars of hairties (to keep your hair out of the way, thus allow-

troduces “Smart Scroll”, which scrolls content automatically by tracking your eye movements, knowing whether you need to scroll up or down. The S4 also allows you to preview content without having to open it, in a feature called “Air View”. Air View, having previously been available on the Samsung Note II, lets you preview emails and photos amongst other content by simply hovering your fingers above the screen. “Air Gesture”, on the other hand, lets you change music or answer a call by the wave of your hand.

THE S4 FEATURING

O

ther new features include the “S Translator”, or what I hope is an early Babel-fish prototype. The ability of instant language translation using voice or text into 9 different languages is a welcome addition (though we’ll have to wait to see how accurate it is!). The camera doesn’t disappoint either. Measuring in at 13 Megapixels, it comes with a whole host of noisy bells and whistles. Dual Shot allows users to take photos using both front and rear cameras simultaneously and then merges the results, whilst “Dual Recording” does this for video. Drama shot is a time-lapse feature that takes a burst of photos

IPHONE KILLER?:

S

limmer, lighter and a HD AMOLED screen, the S4 is an impressive iteration in the Galaxy S series. However, people will ask: are the new features useful on a day-to-day basis, or are they simply gimmicks? Will they use it once ten minutes after unpacking, completely forget about it for the next six months until reminded that their phone has something called “Air Gesture”? Many will be noting that the S4's main improvements are software and not hardware. However, as I suspect Samsung know, fewer consumers buy smartphones on tech specs than do on the user experience. Until we get a hands-on experience of the S4, we won't know whether it will prove to be the iPhone killer. However, with Apple's philosophy of gradual evolution under threat from Samsung's bold innovation, the former will certainly be worried about the threat the latter poses. The S3 has already slowed down iPhone's sales. Gimmicky or not, one thing is for sure: the S4 will sell very well. With the expected launch of the iPhone 5S, Apple has to look to bold new changes to keep up with the pace of development in the smartphone market, or risks being left behind.

DISPLAY 5 Inch Full HD Super AMOLED (1920x1080) display, 441 ppi PROCESSOR 1.9 GHz Quad-Core Processor/1.6 GHz Octa-Core Processor CAMERA Rear 13-megapixel Auto Focus, Front 2-megapixel with Full HD recording @ 30fps, CAMERA FEATURES Dual Shot/Dual Video Recording, Drama Shot, Sound & Shot, 360 Photo, Cinema Photo MEMORY 16/32/64 GB + Expandable storage (up to 64GB) DIMENSIONS 136.6 x 69.8 x 7.9mm, 130g FEATURES Smart Scroll, Smart Pause, Air Gesture, Air View S Translator, Optical Reader Samsung Hub, ChatON (share screen, 3-way calling), Samsung WatchON S Health S Travel S Voice Drive

SAMSUNG GALAXY S4 TECH SPECS

SAMSUNG

S

amsung has launched the Galaxy S4, their new flagship smartphone. Available in shops from 26 April, the S4 brings a whole host of dazzling new features to the Galaxy series. Check the spec box for a geeky rundown on the successor to the S3, but for most of us, a breakdown of processor speeds and RAM doesn’t sell us a smartphone. Whilst Apple excelled in a simple-to-use phone that retains all the functionality and style you need to get ahead in the smartphone market, Samsung has been innovative by bringing new features to the smartphones with their Note and Galaxy series’.

IF YOU'D LIKE TO WRITE FOR THE TECHNOLOGY SECTION OF PARTB, EMAIL technology@ thebeaveronline.co.uk

BONE DADDIES ing you to savour the delish meal without having to worry about anything getting in the way) and garlic cloves. Of course, other condiments such as soy sauce and chilli sauce accompany each table. This is not your average Ramen bar; it is trendy and makes a statement, attracting Londoners looking for an exciting culinary treat. Even the choice of name for the restaurant is quirky —one can only imagine the connotations associated. I began with a Soft Shell Crab (£8), which was similar to tempura due to its batter. The crab was soft and perfectly cooked. What was most impressive about the dish was that despite being fried, it was not oily and greasy—a job well done. This was served with a delicious tangy dipping sauce containing ginger and chilli, which accompanied the crab perfectly. The texture of the sauce was similar to that of homemade Indian green chutney. I ordered a traditional green tea to accompany my meal, although upon my next visit I would be tempted to try one of the more exciting cocktails on offer. After the delicious crab, I was ready for my main course. I decided to try the 20 hour Tonkotsu Ramen (£11), which consists of a rich and

creamy pork bone broth. As expected, the broth was quite thick and full of strong flavours. The pork was tender and sweet, but it was the perfectly cooked eggs with runny yolk that made all the difference. Absolutely delicious! The portion was generous and the sufficient quantity of all the toppings that I asked for were added—the brave hearted may want to try ‘fat pipette’ as an extra (I certainly did not fit into this category!) Instead, I opted for bean sprouts, corn, bamboo and wakame—the last of which was not an option but they were still willing to add it. Each of the extra toppings costs you an extra £0.20— £1, depending on what you choose. The only slightly disappointing thing was the temperature of the food. I would have preferred it to be hotter, especially given the cold temperatures outside! Unfortunately they do not have any desserts on their menu—this left me craving for something sweet to finish my meal. Bone Daddies could perhaps consider adding a few options in the sweet category and the menu would, in turn, be complete. Bone Daddies is definitely worth a visit for anyone who enjoys their Ramen. It offers a variety of differ-

ent types and has substantial portions, allowing you to fully explore and enjoy a variety of flavours. The staff also adds to the vibe of this place—not only are they trendy, but they are also friendly and willing to answer questions about the ingredients and food, constantly offering complementary suggestions. The place is known to get quite busy during lunch hours and dinnertime with long lines forming on the street outside. They stop serving between lunch and dinner and do not take reservations. So, you may have to wait in line, but it is most definitely worth the effort.

Æ Anaita Tejpal

PartB would like to take this occasion to thank all the editors, writers, photographers and artists for making PartB what it is. Without you, none of this would have been possible. Words, by themselves, are nothing but geometrical k`Yh]kafk[jaZ]\mhgfYÛYl surface. Without a reader, they would remain just that—dead, unanimated, and meaningless. As such, we would like to thank you (yes, you, reader! We are breaking the fourth wall here!) for having been with us throughout this whole bgmjf]q&Al`Yk\]Úfal]dq been a fun ride.


Features

The Beaver | 19.03.2013

Features

33

HABEMUS PAPEM CATHOLIC CHURCH (ENGLAND AND WALES)

Camilla Naschert

Service until death. This is the promise that a pope, the messenger of god on earth, is making to himself and to the 1.2 billion Roman Catholic Christians when he commences his mission. For many of them, the words and actions of their leader in faith offer guidelines and a moral authority that eases them through their lives. A clear framework to believe in in the changing winds of time. The resignation of Pope Benedict XVI has fundamentally shaken this principal and, for many Catholics, demystified the role of the head of their church. Even the Pope can fail to find the strength to answer the burning questions that are addressed to the biggest confession on earth. He is not infallible. It is Wednesday, the 13th of March. In the Sistine chapel 115 cardinals decide who of them is the most able to perform the controversial task of 21st century papacy. A decision that will potentially shape the future of Catholicism. Speculations over potential successors of Benedict

are heating up, the anticipation amongst Catholics is enormous. Many are hoping that a new pope will make religion more compatible with modern living, maybe a younger pontiff will make it right. 19.06h: After only five rounds of voting, Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio from Argentina emerges as the new Holy Father. Many are surprised. He is not young. He is conservative. Those that know him may remember his statement in which he condemns gay marriage as “a destructive attempt to end God’s plan” and that he does not support abortion, the contraceptive pill or the ordination of women. How will a straight-line doctrine supporter like him be able to understand the challenges of the everyday lives of his religious community, one may ask. Bergoglio chose the name Francis. This choice is even more meaningful than his attire for his first public appearance – a plain white gown. St Francis of Assisi (†1226) was a humble monk who turned his back on the wealth of his family to find peace and devotion in God,

living a very simple lifestyle with a particular concern for animals and almost no possessions. Born a son of Italian immigrants in Buenos Aires, Bergoglio first studied chemistry before devoting his life to a Jesuit order of priests. The 76 year old leads a modest life and is immensely engaged for the poor, particularly in Argentina and the rest of the Latin American continent. Italian theologian Massimo Faggioli stated: “I don’t expect him to change on doctrine, but he is a more pastoral person. It seems that this Pope will be more aware of what life is all about.” Another cause for surprise on the election night was that the new Pope is the first non-European head of the Catholic Church since antiquity. This is a powerful message to Latin America, the developing countries, the world. President Barack Obama said that the election of Francis “speaks to the strength and vitality of a region that is increasingly shaping our world.” The choice of a Latin American pope shows that the church is widening its

horizon. For too long has the Roman Catholic Church been a “world church” based in the rich heart of Europe. In Latin America, where numbers of people leaving the Catholic community are soaring, Pope Francis can and hopefully will rekindle faith. The new Holy Father definitely does not present himself as an outsider, a reformer or a revolutionary character in the story of Catholicism. Francis emphasises proximity and interaction. In his first prayer and subsequent speech, he asks the crowds on St Peters Square to pray for him and to give him their blessing, before he blesses them. “Let us begin this (…) journey of brotherhood in love and mutual trust.” Almost like a caring grandfather, he ends with “Good night, and sleep well.” A humble, simple speech through which shine optimism and strength. Almost revolutionary. Francis inherits a church stirred up by an array of challenges. A shortage of priests, large numbers of people leaving the confession, a sexual abuse crisis that has cracked the walls of

the church’s moral authority, especially in Europe. How can we make promises of ‘until death do us part’ when even the Pope can not keep them? How can we be good Christians in times of sexual liberation and looser social norms? Just like the predictions on likely candidates were proven wrong, it is too early to make assumptions on future changes within the Catholic Church through Pope Francis. What is certain is that he will speak for the poor and give the developing world a stronger voice in religious matters. Whether or not he will help us find answers on our daily moral conflicts – we will see. Radical changes in church policies concerning women ordinations or gay marriage are unlikely, but not impossible. There are many ways of living a religious life. The diversity of the Catholic church, although it causes problems sometimes, is a very precious asset. My hope for the new papacy is that Francis can guide Catholics towards a life in faith and understanding, in whatever way this life may be designed.


34

Features

19.03.2013 |

The Beaver

Alia Sheikh

cies are forgotten, ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s frivolous and at times audacious mockery of American politicians will be long remembered. From dubbing George W. Bush as a â&#x20AC;&#x153;devilâ&#x20AC;? to public mimicries of Condoleezza Rice and Hillary Clinton, ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s uniquely impudent style of foreign diplomacy cannot be easily forgotten and will undoubtedly remain in both Western and non-Western accounts of his OHJDF\ ,Q UHJLRQDO DŕŽ&#x2030;DLUV especially, this legacy as an obstinate antagonist to the West will not be forgotten. All jokes aside, his values of social integration for Latin America as a whole represented a key part of his foreign policy and will remain embedded in the policies of Mexico, Argentina, Uruguay and Nicaragua. Looking ahead, ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s legacy is sure to permeate the Venezuelan political arena for the foreseeable future largely because of his centralisation of power that elevated him to the point of quasi-divine status. His crucial shortcoming, which must be noted in any analysis of his Presidency, included a failure to institutionalise power and form coherent and relatable policies instead of direct tactics stemming from personal power. The outcome of the upcoming election is predictably in favour of his Vicepresident and successor, the less charismatic but equally ideologically fervent, Nicolas Maduro. The future for the nation as a whole, however, is not as clear. Whether the opposition led by Henrique Capriles Radonski will erode ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s authority is a debatable issue. Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s certain is that Venezuela needs a greater commitment to good governance and a shift away from the personalisation of power sustained through institutions, not just individuals. They question is whether Chavismo can survive without ChĂĄvez. In this respect, time willtell through the longevity of popular public support for ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ideas. For now at least, Hugo ChĂĄvez remains very much present in Venezuela and the publicâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s chants of â&#x20AC;&#x153;we are all ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;? will resound in the political arena for some time.

JAY MORRISON

The death of Hugo ChĂĄvez in Caracas on March 5th brought about an abrupt end to the Presidentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fourteen years in office after a twoyear battle with cancer and an unquestionably controversial Presidency. With all eyes on Venezuela, the nation faces the key question of how to move forward without their most famous leader. ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s legacy will certainly be long-lasting as his time in power transformed both Venezuelaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s political and economic arenas and indeed much of the rest of Latin America. Questions of legitimacy and of ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s commitment to democracy plagued the leader for much of his time in power. Mostly this was owing to his failed military coup of February 1992 which set the tone for a personalised Presidency upon his ascendancy to power in 1998. ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ties to democracy were undeniably dubious despite the holding of free democratic elections, as he often failed to govern democratically. However, the prevalence of popular support amongst swathes of the Venezuelan population suggests that despite his lack of commitment to good governance, ChĂĄvez remained a popular leader in spite of his democratic shortcomings. The role of the press and media has always played an interesting role in questioning ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s legitimacy as the prevalence of state run media organisations attracted much criticism due to the overwhelming bias of the press in favour of ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s decisions. Newspapers such as the Agencia Venezolano de Noticias served almost as a spokesperson for the Venezuelan government. Nevertheless there has existed independently run press organisations which have been largely omitted in most accounts of ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Presidency. Several media outlets such as El Universal openly criticised ChĂĄvez himself as well as his policies and provided the necessary criticisms of government for a politicised state. ChĂĄvez always sought to bring revolutionary change to Venezuelan society. In the domestic sphere,

he delivered. His advocacy of Bolivarian socialism effectively addressed, the sinLŕŽ&#x160;FDQW ZHDOWK LQFRPH GLVparities and shed focused attention on the plight of the poor. His aims to redistribute wealth among Venezuelans centred on a quasi-Robin Hood economic policy which saw the dividends from nationalised oil companies passed frequently to the marginalised and poor of the country. Borne from a vision of Venezuela as a petro-state, ChĂĄvez chose to monopolise the oil companies in a controversial move. However, WKHJDPEOHVHHPHGWRSD\RŕŽ&#x2030; and began to pay dividends at an unprecedented rate. The countryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s main oil company PetrĂłleos de Venezuela (PDVSA) saw its annual revenue rise from $25.8 billion in 1998 to $126 billion during the oil price peak of 2008. Although the leaderâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tactics were certainly risky and murky, his support for the FRXQWU\â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV SRRU ZDV VLJQLŕŽ&#x160;cant and resulted in social change in the form of vast projects. These brought about key infrastructure to poor barrios: clinics, schools, housing, local councils and clean drinking water were brought WRGHSULYHGDUHDVIRUWKHŕŽ&#x160;UVW time, targeted by direct policies aimed at regenerating areaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s inhabited by the poor. ,Q IRUHLJQ SROLF\ DŕŽ&#x2030;DLUV ChĂĄvez leaves behind a distinct legacy of petro diplomacy. His projection of power outwards towards Latin America and indeed the rest of the anti-US world was a policy fraught with controversy. Alliances with unsavoury tyrannical leaders VXFK DV *DGGDŕŽ&#x160; $VVDG DQG Ahmadinejad did little to placate the US fears of ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s agenda in regards to foreign DŕŽ&#x2030;DLUV Largely overlooked is his overarching vision and proposal for a new world order WR RŕŽ&#x2030;VHW $PHULFDQ LQŕŽ&#x2039;XHQFH UHJLRQDOO\ DQG WKH VLJQLŕŽ&#x160;cant support he garnered for his anti-American policies which, as he stated, resounded â&#x20AC;&#x153;from Caracas to Karachi.â&#x20AC;? Viewed in this light, his so-called Bolivar Doctrine, parodying the American Monroe Doctrine of 1823, seemlingly succeeded in its goal for greater equality and autonomy among nations and more equal distributions of power. Even if his successful poli-

ÂĄQUE COMUNISMO!

ChĂĄvezâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s legacy: lessons learned and the future of Venezuela


Features

The Beaver | 19.03.2013

No rest for the wicked: the .XUGLVK7XUNLVK&RQрл║LFW Dominic Hung

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35

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36

Features

19.03.2013 | The Beaver

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Changing the Rulesâ&#x20AC;? Holly Brentnall interviews Jason Hickel

What is your role in the campaign and how did you become involved? I am on the Council of Advisors to /The Rules, which is the organization thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s running the campaign against tax havens. The reason I got involved is because Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve long been troubled

What do you think drives you to act whilst others remain passive? I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t think that others are necessarily passive. There are a number of organizations that have been working on this issue for a long time, including the Tax Justice Network and Oxfam. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re just helping bring it to a head, and mobilize popular consciousness about it. So far the campaign has been featured on the BBCâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s morning news show and in the Guardian, so weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re making headway. Who else are you working with to organize the campaign? UK Uncut, various London student unions (including the LSESU), the City Reform Group, and Occupy. +RZ GR \RX ૽QG WKH WLPH

to take action, alongside your work lecturing at LSE as well as your writing career? Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a matter of principle, I suppose. I believe that if Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m going to teach about these issues in my courses, then I should do what I can to act on them as well. I encourage my students to think about how to use the things they learn to be actively engaged in the world, so I feel that I should lead by example; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all part of good pedagogy, as far as Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m concerned. What would you say to the argument that the problems you are dealing with may be rooted in human nature? I disagree. As an anthropologist, I can say that the ethnographic record is full of examples of societies where the level of accumulation and inequality that we see in the UK, for instance, just isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t present, or is broadly condemned on various moral grounds. But even here: how many people in the UK really think this kind of pillage is okay? In fact, there was a time in the recent past when British people and politicians collectively aimed to reduce poverty and inequality, and got a long way toward accomplishing it. The fact that weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re moving in the other direction now doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to /THERULES

â&#x20AC;&#x153;It was people who made this mess, and its people who can get us out again!â&#x20AC;? Addressing a crowd outside the Royal Exchange last Saturday, one of the organisers of /The Rules campaign spoke out about their plans to take action against the massive tax haven that constitutes the City of London. His speech was followed by music and poetry readings, drawing emphatically on issues of global injustice. Amongst the onlookers, stood Jason Hickel, another of the eventâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s organisers and lecturer in Economic Anthropology at LSE. As a proactive member of the occupy movement as well as /The Rules campaign, Hickel is not your average academic. With a passion for acting upon his convictions and an enthusiasm that is contagious among his students, the protestors were indeed fortunate to have him in their midst at / The Rules demonstration. /The Rules is organised as part of a decentralised network of several campaign hubs around the world. Their mission is to tackle global poverty and inequalities through righting the injustices that create them. Forget Starbucks, forget individual celebrities, and forget the taxing of British citizens; at least $1.06 trillion in tax revenues is extracted out of the poorest countries every year. The culprit? The City of London. It is here, at the heart of the capital that lays the beast that feasts upon unHTXDO ŕŽ&#x2039;RZV RI ZHDOWK OHDYLQJ the global South drained. One of those assisting the move towards a more equal outcome is Jason Hickel. I asked him about his involvement in Changing The Rules.

by standard approaches to development and aid, which tend to imagine poverty in the Global South as natural or given. But thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just not the case. Looking at the data, we see DQHWŕŽ&#x2039;RZRIZHDOWKIURPSRRU countries to rich countries in WKH IRUP RI DUWLŕŽ&#x160;FLDOO\ FKHDS resources and labour power, as interest payments on debt, and WKURXJKWD[HYDVLRQ7KLVŕŽ&#x2039;RZ amounts to hundreds of billions of dollars each year, vastly outstripping the meagre aid disbursements that trickle the other direction. This is possible because the rules of the global economy are rigged in favour of rich nations and corporations - thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s why we see that the wealth gap between poor countries and rich countries is widening. /The Rules recognizes this, and seeks to shift our thinking away from the paradigm of aid to a paradigm of justice. Poor countries donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t need our aid, they need us to stop plundering them. We need to change the rules of the global economy to make them fairer and more democratic. Targeting the tax haven status of the City of London is a great ŕŽ&#x160;UVWVWHS7KH&LW\KHOSVKLGH some $21 trillion in wealth, much of it stolen from developing countries in the form of transfer pricing. This is possible because the City is not subject to the transparency laws that govern the rest of the UK. That needs to stop. But the problem persists because the City is not democratic: the vast majority of the districtâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s votes are held by corporations, not by actual people - a practice that was outlawed long ago in the rest of the country.

do with human nature, but rather has to do with the fact that weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve created a system that incentivizes rampant accumulation. Consider the fact that corporations are required to maximize quarterly shareholder returns, which basically forces them to pursue the cheapest labour and lightest regulations around the world. This prompts a kind of â&#x20AC;&#x153;race to the bottomâ&#x20AC;?, with the perverse HŕŽ&#x2030;HFWRIIRUFLQJSRRUFRXQWULHV WR FRPSHWH WR RŕŽ&#x2030;HU WKH PRVW exploitable workers, give away raw materials, and grant extended tax holidays to multinational companies. +RZ GLG â&#x20AC;ŤÚ?â&#x20AC;Ź7KH 5XOHVâ&#x20AC;Ť૽ Ú&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹUVW learn about how the CoL constitutes a huge tax haven? Information about the CoLâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tax haven status is available. Consider all of the corporations that make use of it! The problem is that most citizens arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t aware of it. In fact, ZKHQ , ŕŽ&#x160;UVW PRYHG WR /RQGRQ I had no idea that the City was a separately governed entity, with its own laws and its own police force. It says in your petition that Saturdayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s demonstration is RQO\ WKH ૽UVW VWHS :KDW HOVH are you planning? Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re aiming at a number

of long-term goals and will build up to them with a series of incremental demands. Stay tuned for whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s next. The idea is to build awareness around tax havens not only among people here in the UK, or in the rest of the Western world, but among people in the Global South, the people who are most harmed by transfer pricing and other forms of corporate tax evasion by foreign companies. /The Rules wants to create ways for them to express their concerns. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s why weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not relying solely on internet-based technology, which most people in the Global South still cannot access. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re pioneering a system called /Crowdring, which allows anyone with a mobile phone anywhere in the world to make a free call to the number associated with any given petition in order to add their â&#x20AC;&#x153;signatureâ&#x20AC;? to it. This was used recently for the anti-corruption campaign in India, and they gathered some 30 million signatures. I think /Crowdring technology creates exciting new potential for global democracy. Want to help change the rules? If so visit http://www. therules.org to sign the petition and spread the word!


Features

The Beaver | 19.03.2013

37

The state of womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s rights in India Gurdeep Chhina

The state of womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s rights in India have been brought back to the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s attention following the death of Ram Singh, one of the suspects of the gang rape and murder of a 23 year old student in Delhi. The suspectâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s death in prison has refocused attention once more on the treatment of women in what is apparently the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s largest democracy and also on the governmentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s handling of the crimes against women. The outrage, protest and questioning that followed this brutal attack led some to call this Indiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Rosa Parkâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;sâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; moment. A few months on and its

natural to wonder: what has actually changed in India? $V PRUH DQG PRUH KRUULŕŽ&#x160;F details emerged about the rape and murder of the young woman, many people questioned how a crime of this level could occur in modern day India. An India that prides itself on having one of the fastest growing economies in the world and whose government is keen to show the world how developed it has become. But for those who are already familiar with what it is like to be an ordinary woman in India, the news of this gang rape was saddening but unfortunately not surprising. The media was quick to KANNANOKANNAN

made a number of symbolic gestures. More fast track courts have been established and this yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s annual budget speech saw the allocation of ÂŁ125 million for the improvement of womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s security. The Indian Finance minister Palaniappan Chidambaram, said the attack had cast â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;a dark shadowâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, an understatement to say the least, given the sheer size and the depth of the societal problem. Members of the government appear to be dancing around the issue, none of them are prepared to bite the bullet and openly discuss the deeper problem at hand. The thing is that the high levels of crime against women stems from attitudes from some within society. At every stage of their lives, women are discriminated against. The widespread problem of female infanticide across India is caused by the attitude that girls are a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;burden upon the familyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. This is not just a problem of education and poverty though, Punjab which is one of Indiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s wealthiest states has one of its lowest male to female ratios. In  FHQVXV ŕŽ&#x160;JXUHV VKRZHG

start reporting new incidents of rape as if it was a totally new concept to them and they had only just been alerted to its existence. Long lists of numerous violent attacks on women began to appear within newspapers, the details of which often bear too much to think about. But rape has been a widespread problem in India for a long time. TrustLaw, run by Thomas Reuters, has ranked India as the worst G20 country to live in for women. In regards to the often immobile Indian government, it has been embarrassed at the exposure of Indiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;darkâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; at an international level, many have asked: what has actually been done? After using tear gas and violence against protestors calling for change, the government quickly set up a fast track court to hold the trial of those accused. For most rape victims though, the wait for justice is usually a lot longer with Indiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s legal system being notoriously slow, with a long back log of cases. In a bid to appease the sudden spread of fury amongst Indians, the government has

846 women to 1000 males. Often missing out on educational opportunities at the expense of their male siblings for many women, when it comes to marriage, the widespread problem of dowry still persists. In 2010 alone 8391 cases of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;dowry deathsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; were reported, whereby women were murdered for not bringing a sufficient dowry to their in laws. Even the police do not necessarily offer a sufficient safeguard for women. Accusations of rape against police officers are not uncommon. Many activists within Kashmir regularly accuse the police of using rape as a weapon. Changes in the law will help, but wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t transform the situation. What needs to occur is a change within societyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s attitudes towards women. The widespread protests and vigils held by both men and women following the attack on a woman in December last year, are a sign of hope. Clearly there are huge sections of Indian society who do want an end to this attitude towards women. Hopefully, the moment for change has come.

North Korea: a cocktail of unpredictability? It is often said that predicting the future actions of North Korea is an impossible task, particularly given how the international dynamic has changed in recent times. China is in the process of a leadership tranVLWLRQ DQG 6RXWK .RUHDâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV ŕŽ&#x160;UVW female President is less than 4 weeks into the job. Then there is the obvious factor of a North Korea under the relatively new leadership of Kim Jong-Un, whose main priority will be to cement his place at the top of the leadership without internal power politicking in the Party. Throw into the equation UN sanctions, recent nuclear tests and colourful new rhetoric by the North and you can argue that you have a cocktail of unpredictability. As the DPRK engages in new nuclear tests, it isolates itself even further in the international community. North Koreaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s main ally, China, voted for the UN sanctions against the DPRK, insisting that tensions need not escalate. Whilst Pyongyang has long relied on the international support of Beijing, it continues to push the limits of Sino-NK relations. Although it has consistently been in Beijingâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s interest to ensure stability on the Korean peninsula, being pulled into FRQŕŽ&#x2039;LFWEHWZHHQWKHWZR.RUH as is something theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d look to avoid. This is particularly true given the fact that this would distract from their main priority of ensuring a smooth leader-

ship transition to Xi Jingping. Meanwhile, Park Geun-hye, the new South Korean President, has talked of attempting to engage with the North by insisting that, â&#x20AC;&#x153;trust can be built up by dialogue and by keeping our promisesâ&#x20AC;?. However, 3DUN ŕŽ&#x160;QGV VKH PXVW ŕŽ&#x160;QG WKH balance between keeping the opportunity for dialogue open DQG EHLQJ ŕŽ&#x160;UP LQ WKH IDFH RI provocation by the North. In reality, this means that reuniŕŽ&#x160;FDWLRQSURJUHVVLVXQOLNHO\VR long as tensions continued to be stirred up by the North, as the South has no choice to respond. The trouble for the South LV WKDW WKH\ ŕŽ&#x160;QG WKHPVHOYHV responding to the actions of the North instead of leading WKH ZD\ WRZDUGV D UHXQLŕŽ&#x160;FD tion of the two states. The South are locked in an actionresponse process that prohibits them from taking leadership on the issue. So long as the North heightens tensions, fails to denuclearize and carries out strikes on the South, the South has little choice but to defend itself and insist the North shows its commitment WR UHXQLŕŽ&#x160;FDWLRQ LQ DFWLRQ DQG not rhetoric. Then there are the â&#x20AC;&#x153;American Imperialistsâ&#x20AC;?. Recently accused of a cyber attack on the North Korean state, America is keen that Pyongyang desist from their nuclear tests, however, what can Washington do? $EDŕŽ? HG6WDWHGHSDUWPHQW looked on as Google Chairman Eric Schmidt and former Governor of New Mexico Bill

Richardson made a private visit to the DPRK, only to be followed by American basketball supreme Dennis Rodman who was photographed laughing alongside Kim, with Rodman saying Kim was a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;friend for lifeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. Bilateral relations between the countries are at an impasse, with diplomacy being championed by private individuals. Or was Rodman a Trojan horse of the State Department? But to understand the next move between the international players, we need to look at the motives of the North Korean state. Many experts PDLQWDLQWKDWWKHŕŽ&#x160;HU\UKHWRULF is nothing new. If thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s one consistency from Pyongyang over time, it is that its propaganda will talk up a â&#x20AC;&#x153;holy warâ&#x20AC;?, VHDV RI ŕŽ&#x160;UH DQG DQ LPSHQGLQJ doomsday for the South. The Northâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s real priority at the moment is internal stability. Ironically, this can be achieved by external aggression. Keen to assert his position in the Party and the internal power structures of the system, Kim JongUn must ensure that the transition from his father brings no dissident voices to fruit in the elite. Kimâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s young exuberance may help him internally, but it is his actions on the international stage on which the elite will judge whether his abundance in youthfulness is equally matched by a strong â&#x20AC;ŤÚ?â&#x20AC;ŹPLOLWDU\ŕŽ&#x160;UVWâ&#x20AC;Ť Ú&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹUXOH .LP ZLOO EHJURZLQJLQFRQŕŽ&#x160;GHQFHDIWHU the successful nuclear tests, and his strategy of creating an

atmosphere of fear both internally and externally looks to be working. However, will the fear be backed up by action? Although we should not rule out any further nuclear tests, we should also look at the how the North has behaved in the past. Increasing tensions on the peninsula is aimed at continuing the â&#x20AC;&#x153;Provocation-reward cycleâ&#x20AC;? (whereby the North increases tensions with the aim to bring the USA to the negotiating table, and then scales back its activities in exchange for a removal of sanctions or aid). Because of this, any future provocations are likely to be mid-scale provocations, targeting infrastructure or territorial disagreements. It is simply not in the interest of Kim to be involved in a PETERSNOOPY

Mike Pearson

war. US-South Korean combined forces will not be dissolved until 2016, with Pyongyang knowing that despite WKHLUâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ?â&#x20AC;ŹPLOLWDU\ŕŽ&#x160;UVWâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹSROLF\WKLV would pale in comparison to the isolation they face in the international community, especially as China would also seek to avoid being dragged into VXFKDFRQŕŽ&#x2039;LFW Hence, Pyongyang is walking a tightrope. It has been doing so for years. It is a careful political balancing act between ensuring it uses provocations as a pretense for dialogue, and not going over the top with such provocations. Words of war will not be met with actual war. However, some are saying that this time LV GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQW EXW LV WKDW ZKDW Kim Jong-Un wants us to think?


38

Sport

19.03.2013

| The Beaver

LSE Tennis - A golden year Selina Parmar looks back at the clubâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;aceâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; achievements and the key players involved.

7KHJURZLQJVXFFHVVRIWKH/6(WHQQLVFOXEVKRXOGQRWEHXQGHUHVWLPDWHG:LWKDFRDFKWUDLQLQJVSHUZHHNDQGŕŽ&#x160;WQHVVVHVVLRQVLWLVQRVXUSULVHWKDW WKHPHQDQGZRPHQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVVWWHDPVZLOOERWK KRSHIXOO\ EHSURPRWHGWRWKH3UHPLHUVKLSWKLV\HDU7KHPHQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVQGâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVSODFHLQWKHLUOHDJXHLV\HWWREHGHWHUPLQHGDQGWKH ZRPHQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVQGâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVZLOOŕŽ&#x160;QLVKLQVHFRQGLQWKHLUOHDJXH$IWHUWKHJUXHOLQJRUGHDORIWULDOVEDFNLQ2FWREHUDOOWKUHHWHDPVKDYHVKRZQLPPHQVHFRPPLWPHQWFRPSHWLWLRQ DQGGULYHERWKRQDQGRŕŽ&#x2030;FRXUWZLWKZDLWLQJOLVWVIRUWUDLQLQJVPDQ\IDQWDVWLFPDWFKHVDQGPDQ\ŕŽ&#x160;HUFHFRPHEDFNV<HWWKHVHDVRQLVQRWRYHU7KHPHQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVŕŽ&#x160;UVWVDUH SOD\LQJLQWKHŕŽ&#x160;QDORIWKHFXSWRGD\DJDLQVW6FRWWLVKULYDOV6WLUOLQJ8QLYHUVLW\WDNLQJDEXVORDGRIVXSSRUWHUVZLWKWKHPGUHVVHGLQIXOO/6(NLWEHDULQJSXUSOHEODFN and gold face paint, and ready to cheer loudly from the sidelines.

JJ - Club Captain and Full Colours Award Winner  'HVSLWH WKH REYLRXV FKRLFH EHWZHHQ IRRWEDOO DQG WHQQLV ZKDW WRRN \RX VR ORQJ WR FKRRVHWHQQLV" Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been a slow and progressive transition that began with the possibility of receiving weekly pitchers at zoo bar if I chose to be social sec in my second year. This was clearly an obvious decision. After the success we had last year on the court, it would have been rude to abandon the squad, and with the idea of being able to help lead and expand the club towards further success, it had to be done. ,KHDU\RXVRPHWLPHVVWUXJJOHDWWKHSPUXVKDWWKH'DLO\*ULQG WKH7RZHUVFDIH  KRZKDYH\RXGHDOWZLWK\RXUDQ[LHW\DWWKLVEXV\WLPH" ,KDYHQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹW,Wâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVDWLPHZKHUH,VWDQGDZNZDUGO\DZDLWLQJWKHPDFKLQHWRŕŽ&#x160;QLVKPDNLQJDFRŕŽ&#x2030;HHRQH by one, complemented by anxious sweating making the struggle even worse. +DVLWEHHQGLIILFXOWWRUHJDLQUHVSHFWDVDFOXEFDSWDLQDIWHUORVLQJDOOFUHGLELOLW\DIWHU WKH૽UVWWHDPGLQQHUV" ,WKDV1RWHQWLUHO\VXUHLWâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVHYHUEHHQUHJDLQHGDIWHUŕŽ&#x160;QGLQJRXWWKDWKDOIWKHFOXEDFWXDOO\WKLQN ,â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹPWKHVRFLDOVHFDVDSSRVHGWRFOXEFDSWDLQ,ZDVWRRH[FLWHGIRUWKHŕŽ&#x160;UVW:HGQHVGD\QLJKWRIWKH year. I got carried away, nothing I can do about that now, it was worth it. ,KHDUG\RXGUHVVHGXSDVWKH4XHHQIRU&DUROâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2039;â&#x20AC;ŹZKDWZDVWKHEHVWSDUWRIGUHVVLQJXS DVDZRPDQ" Not really sure thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ever a best part about cross-dressing. The dress was awfully breezy in the harsh winter winds, and my leg hair kept getting caught in my tights which wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t ideal but I guess thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the price youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got to pay being the queen. Waking up in the morning after passing RXWLQP\WLJKWVZDVSUREDEO\WKHZRUVWSDUWDERXWLWDV,KDGWRSHHOELWVRIPRQH\RŕŽ&#x2030;P\OHJV which was pretty weird.

Chris - Menâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Captain and Sportsman of the Year Award winner

,WPXVWEHKDUGPDLQWDLQLQJVXFKDKLJKOHYHORIWHQQLV \HWDOVREHLQJRQHRI/RQGRQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVXSDQGFRPLQJUDSSHUVIRU WKHXQGHUJURXQGKLSKRSVFHQH+RZGR\RXPDQDJHLW" I guess the two are just somewhat complimentary â&#x20AC;&#x201C; hip hop is all about staying true to your roots and tennis just provides so much lyrical ammo. Perhaps people donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t realise but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a crazy thug life out there on the court, all in whiteâ&#x20AC;Ś not least when uniâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s like /6(DQG,PSHULDOIDFHRŕŽ&#x2030; ,KHDUWKDW\RXFDQKDYHDELWRIDWHPSHURQFRXUWZKDW LVWKHZRUVWWKLQJ\RXâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹYHHYHUVDLGWRDQRSSRQHQW" As Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m sure my teammates will no doubt testify, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m a very measured man, of just a few wise, and sometimes rhyming words. I like to let my racquet do the talking â&#x20AC;&#x201C; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s often eloquence perVRQLŕŽ&#x160;HG  ,I \RX FRXOG FKRRVH RQH SURIHVVLRQDO WHQQLV SOD\HU WR GDWHZKRZRXOGLWEH" Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s toughâ&#x20AC;Ś sisters might be the dream, but Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m gonna say Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll steer clear of the Williamsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; for sure, as Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not convinced I could handle that. Is Ana Ivanovic still available? %HVWPRPHQWRIWKH\HDU The yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been so unimaginably successful that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hard to NQRZ ZKHUH WR EHJLQ 7KH )LUVW WHDP ZRQ WKH %8&6 'LY  IRU Anna â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s captain WKHŕŽ&#x160;UVWWLPHLQ/6(KLVWRU\DQGZHDOVRKDYHWKH7URSK\)LQDO +DVEHLQJ6ZHGLVKHYHUKHOG\RXEDFNIURPMRLQLQJLQZLWKWKHEDQWHURIWKHWHQQLV DQG3UHPLHU/HDJXH3OD\2ŕŽ&#x2030;VWRFRPH Perhaps the best moment of the year for me was seeing the look WHDP" No. I provide the wittiest banter for the team; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just a shame that no one understands such a on the 2ndâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s face when they beat Essex in a key relegation batWOHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2039;â&#x20AC;ŹWKH\â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹGORVWWKHLUŕŽ&#x160;UVWIRXUŕŽ&#x160;[WXUHVRIWKH\HDUEXWWKHVHER\V high level of chat. are the hardest working bunch I know, and it has been amazing :KDWGR\RXSUHIHU*ULPVKDZRUWHQQLV" WRVHHWKHWXUQDURXQGORVLQJMXVWRQHPRUHŕŽ&#x160;[WXUHDOO\HDU$Q Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a tough call â&#x20AC;&#x201C; I love them both. Oh, who am I kidding? Tennis. $VYLVLEO\RQHRIWKHPRVWGHWHUPLQHGSOD\HUVRQWKHWHDPKRZGR\RXPDLQWDLQ\RXU incredible reward for their perseverance (and a mention for the FRPSRVXUHRQFRXUW" UROHRXUFRDFK'LPR$QJXHORYKDVKDGLQWKLV â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x17E;â&#x20AC;ŹWKHORRNRI I like to think that I have a strong mental attitude on court. If I make an unforced error, I remind HFVWDV\DQGYLQGLFDWLRQQRWOHDVWRQ-DFN$VKŕŽ&#x160;HOGâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVIDFHLVRQH myself to take one point at a time. Keep calm and carry on. Throughout matches, I remind myself of my overriding joyous images of the year. of my strategy and how I need to execute it. :RUVWPRPHQWRIWKH\HDU %HVWPRPHQWRIWKH\HDU Imperial certainly tested our patience with a somewhat alternaThe best moment would have to be beating Kent, after losing to them at the start of Michaelmas tive notion of fair-play, but then we beat them every time, so Term. This match was a key win for us, and now we just waiting on the result of one match to know WKDWHQGHGXSEHLQJTXLWHIXQ,ZDQWWRSRLQWWRDŕŽ&#x160;[WXUHWKDW LIZHZLOOJHWSURPRWHGWRWKH3UHPLHUVKLS/HDJXH)LQJHUVFURVVHG2YHUDOO,â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹYHEHHQVXSHULP we lost, but there hasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t been one in two years so Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m going to SUHVVHGZLWKWKHSHUVHYHUDQFHIURPDOORIP\WHDP,â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹYHZDWFKHGVRPHJUHDWŕŽ&#x160;JKWVDQGŕŽ&#x160;JKWEDFNV go with Thursday mornings, waiting for JJ to limber up for our DQGQRZWKHŕŽ&#x160;QDOUHVXOWLVRXWRIRXUKDQGV 9am meets, before accepting at noon that he wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be in until at :KDW,â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹPPRVWORRNLQJIRUZDUGWRQH[W\HDU Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m very sad that so many of our girls are leaving this year, as it really has been a fantastic year. least 4pm, and even thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a push half the time. That really gets However, hopefully weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll have another fantastic team next year â&#x20AC;&#x201C; the chance to compete in the me down. 3UHPLHUVKLSLVDYHU\H[FLWLQJSURVSHFW

Awards

and hard work.

Players of the year: 0HQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV ૽UVW WHDP â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Chris. Being the highest ranked undergraduate tennis player in the country is not an easy feat, nor is dropping only one set throughout his whole two years of university matches. And never losing a university match. Ever.

:RPHQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV ૽UVW WHDP â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Danielle. Not only is she one of the strongest members of the team, but is also a great team player through her advice to others. With her experience, she never hesitates to help someone out if they are struggling technically or psychologically on court â&#x20AC;&#x201C; hugely appreciated by the rest of the team.

0HQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVVHFRQGWHDP â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Alexis. With his green LongChamp bag in tow, his improvement through the year has been most impressive, with his strong perseverance on court

:RPHQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV VHFRQG WHDP â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Maria. With her style, charm, class, beauty and humour on DQG RŕŽ&#x2030; WKH FRXUW 0DULD )RV sarello comes running to the

Wednesday matches from campus. She manages to get the job done pretty quick â&#x20AC;&#x201C; in our last match beating her opponent before any of the others KDGŕŽ&#x160;QLVKHGDVHW 2OGHVW SOD\HU: Gerard. Although our 33 year old postgrad still plays with a wooden racquet and rocks out the McEnroe hairstyle with a visor RQ RFFDVLRQ KH LV WKH ŕŽ&#x160;HUFHVW doubles player to grace the courts of LSE.

WRS SHUIRUPDQFH RQ WKH ŕŽ&#x160;UVW club dinners of the year. He PDQDJHG WR VHW D JUHDW ŕŽ&#x160;UVW impression by running away from Leicester square station, not to be heard from the entire night. The next morning our dear captain woke up with no memory or clothes and parallel gashâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s across his back.

0RVW EDQWHURXV SOD\HU Rૼ FRXUW: Has to go to Dylan. With his shirt half buttoned in Grand Connaught Rooms and fully unbuttoned by Zoo bar, KHPDQDJHGWRSLFNDŕŽ&#x160;JKWRXW of thin air and was swiftly escorted out. The ultimate low indeed.

After such a great year, it will :RUVW SHUIRUPDQFH RQ D be sad to see so many of us part :HGQHVGD\QLJKW: Girls. ways and continue onto other endeavors. But until then, we 0RVW EDQWHURXV SOD\HU RQ must celebrate what has been FRXUW: Lisa â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;loves her legsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; achieved, look towards a great 6WURQJHVW SHUIRUPDQFH RQ Losseva, who once shouted at future for the club and most D :HGQHVGD\ QLJKt: must go her opponent that she â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t importantly, win today. to our club captain JJ, for his even play tennisâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.


LSE Ultimate Frisbee make nationals Callum Ballard

I write this under the assumption that some 99 per cent of readers will be unfamiliar with the sport of Ultimate Frisbee, so, hereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a reminder of the rulesâ&#x20AC;Ś Ultimate is 7 vs. 7, SOD\HGRQDŕŽ&#x160;HOGDNLQWRDUXJ by pitch without the posts, you VFRUH D SRLQW E\ FDWFKLQJ LQ the opponentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s end zone, and \RX FDQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹW PRYH ZKHQ KROGLQJ the disc. The sport requires a JUHDWGHDORIVNLOOVWDPLQDDQG athleticism â&#x20AC;&#x201C; search for â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;UltiPDWH +LJKOLJKWVâ&#x20AC;Ť Ú&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹRQ <RXWXEH for some choice example. /6(EHJDQWKHVHDVRQ E\ZLQQLQJWKHDQQXDO/RQGRQ %HJLQQHUVâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;Ź7RXUQDPHQWDVUH ported in the Beaver in MichDHOPDV 7HUP 7KLV ZHHNHQG however, the team competed LQDUJXDEO\WKHPRVWLPSRUWDQW tournament of the year â&#x20AC;&#x201C; the BUCS South-East Outdoor ReJLRQDOV  WHDPV IURP ŕŽ&#x160;IWHHQ universities came to a chilly St. Albans to compete for places at BUCS Nationals, to be held LQ1RWWLQJKDPRYHUWKH(DVWHU EUHDN /6( KDYH QHYHU IDLOHG WRPDNHQDWLRQDOVLQWKHLUKLV tory, so the pressure was most GHŕŽ&#x160;QLWHO\RQ Saturday saw each side SOD\WKHLULQLWLDOJURXSJDPHV which would determine the UDQNLQJV IRU 6XQGD\ â&#x20AC;Ť Ú&#x2039;â&#x20AC;ŹZKHQ the all-important battle for naWLRQDOV ZRXOG EH IRXJKW /6(

39

Sport

The Beaver | 19.03.2013

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WKH ŕŽ&#x160;QDO SRLQW UHTXLUHG IRU victory after the time-cap had passed, and LSE were left to play perennial rivals, Imperial discDoctors, for fourth place. One of the pillars of Ultimate (defended to the death E\ DQ\ VHOIUHVSHFWLQJ SOD\HU  is that the sport is self-refereed. This, naturally, relies on IDLU SOD\ DQG JRRG VSLULW IURP everyone on both sides. Unfortunately, such spirit can sometimes be absent, and just DV)UDQN/DPSDUGZDVGHQLHG DQ REYLRXV JRDO LQ WKH  world cup round of sixteen DJDLQVW *HUPDQ\ VR WRR ZHUH /6( GHQLHG D ZLQQLQJ SRLQW DV,PSHULDOLQFRUUHFWO\DUJXHG that LSEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Brian Tsien had slid into the end-zone whilst catchLQJWKHGLVNDQGKDGWKXVQRW been in when the disc was FDXJKW 7KH SRLQW WKXV FRXOG not stand, and Imperial went RQWRZLQWKHPRVWKDUGIRXJKW JDPH RI WKH ZKROH ZHHNHQG  LQ VXGGHQ GHDWK OHDYLQJ /6(ŕŽ&#x160;IWKRYHUDOO /DUJHO\ WKDQNV WR 6DWXU GD\â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVVWURQJVKRZLQJ/6(VWLOO DWWDLQHG WKHLU JRDO RI PDNLQJ Nationals, where they shall be in the same division as ImpeULDO &ROOHJH <RX FDQ EH VXUH WKDW /6( ZLOO GR HYHU\WKLQJ WKDWWKH\FDQWRH[DFWUHYHQJH DQG ULJKWIXOO\ UHHVWDEOLVK themselves as the best team in /RQGRQ

LSE RESULTS THIS WEEK FOOTBALL ,PSHULDO&ROOHJH/RQ GRQ0HQVVW London School of EcoQRPLFV0HQVVW London School of EcoQRPLFV0HQVWK .LQJâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV&ROOHJH/RQGRQ 0HGLFV0HQVWK City University London 0HQVQG/RQGRQ School of Economics 0HQVUG Queen Mary UniversiW\RI/RQGRQ0HQVVW /RQGRQ6FKRRORI (FRQRPLFV0HQVVW

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own bed, with this Wednesday EHLQJQRGLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQWDVVKHZRNH XS QDNHG ZLWK WKH WZR IUHVK ers, both of whom it should be said were fully clothed. 0DNLQJ D VOLJKWO\ GLŕŽ&#x2030;HUHQW impression on the MetropoliWDQ3ROLFHZDV+DLJKZKRJRW EDQQHG IURP &RYHQW *DUGHQ IRU  KRXUV \HW ZDV VRPH KRZDOORZHGWRJRWR=RR%DU clearly the police appreciate the importance of Zoo. Aussie Johnno was less fortunate, OXFNLO\KHKDGDOUHDG\JRWZLWK Second team netball captain EHIRUHJHWWLQJDUUHVWHGHQGLQJ his chance for conversion. In an equally sorry state ZDV+DLJKâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVWZLQZKRVHFKDUP RŕŽ&#x2030;HQVLYH IDLOHG DIWHU RŕŽ&#x2030;HULQJ WRJHWZLWKDJLUOVRVKHZRXOG EX\ KLP GULQNV HVVHQWLDOO\ ZKDWJLUOVGRRQDZHHNO\EDVLV 6WD\LQJLQ=RRZLWKQRGULQNLQ hand may not have been his EHVW GHFLVLRQ :LWK =RR EHLQJ VRSDFNHGDQGWKHWHPSHUDWXUH ULVLQJ LW DFWXDOO\ PDGH QG ;, )& PHPEHU FULVS\â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV IDNH tan dribble down his face. He FODLPHGQRWWRNQRZWKHFDXVH RIWKHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ?â&#x20AC;ŹZHLUGGDUNSDWFKHVâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹRQ his face.

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\RXQJ DSSUHQWLFH WRRN KLV DO PRVWZHHNO\SUL]HKRPH*HQ eral course student did rather :HOO IRU KHUVHOI PDQDJLQJ WKUHH SXOOV LQFOXGLQJ URZLQJâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV 6SDQLVKJLDQW /X[KDGPL[HGOXFNPDQDJ LQJ WR SXOO D GD\ EXW ZDV OHVV successful when he moved on WR '& 5DPSLQJ XS WKH WHP SHUDWXUH LQ %ULWDLQ ZDV UXJE\ fresher and a third team footEDOOHU 1R 0ROOLHFRGGOLQJ IRU DQRWKHUZHHN:RPHQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV5XJE\ ZLWQHVVHG WKHLU IUHVKHU PDNH her move on Mr LSE. A very uneventful evenLQJ IRU WKH ROGHVW PHPEHU RI ZRPHQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVUXJE\ZDVQRWGXHWR KHUSDVVLQJRXWRUEHLQJWDNHQ home early but was down to KHU JHWWLQJ ORVW LQ D SULYDWH PHPEHUV FOXE 7KH SRRU JLUO ZDV VWXFN LQ WKHUH DIWHU JHW WLQJ ORVW LQ WKH EXLOGLQJ RQO\ PDQDJLQJ WR HVFDSH WKURXJK WKH EDVHPHQW ŕŽ&#x160;UH H[LW DW  DPDQGPLVVLQJDOORI=RR%DU Team Dinners and Tour awaits the AU and for those OHDYLQJ /6( WKLV \HDU WKHUH LV RQHPRUHZHHNOHIWWRHQMR\WKH IXQDQGJDPHVRIDQ$8H[LVW ence.

.LQJâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV&ROOHJH/RQGRQ 0HGLFV0L[HGVW London School of EcoQRPLFV0L[HGVW Royal Holloway, University of London 0L[HGVW/RQGRQ School of Economics 0L[HGVW

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Sport

40

Sport

19.03.2013

| The Beaver

Inside â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x161;â&#x20AC;Ź7HQQLV<HDU,Q5HYLHZ â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x161;â&#x20AC;Ź:KDW+DSSHQV,Q=RR%DU â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x161;â&#x20AC;Ź8OWLPDWH)ULVEHH6XFFHVV

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Despite early signs of ideal playing weather, with rays of sun splashing across the 1st XV pitch, soon blistering wind and skin-stinging snow poured across Fortress Berrylands from the poly on the VWUDQGâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹVŕŽ&#x160;HOGV The LSE team, returned to full strength despite a number of injuries throughout the season, marched FRQŕŽ&#x160;GHQWO\RQWRWKHSLWFKDORRNLQWKHLUH\HVWKDW VSHOOHGGHWHUPLQDWLRQIRUDUHVRXQGLQJYLFWRU\'H spite having defeated their opponents, RUMS twos, on their own turf last term, this was sure to be a chalOHQJLQJŕŽ&#x160;[WXUHERWKWHDPVHDJHUWRPDNHDVWURQJ LPSUHVVLRQLQWKHODVWIHZZHHNVRIWKHVHDVRQ LSE supporters sat watching in eager anticipation, Sainsburys own brand Cava and Bucks Fizz LQ KDQG DV 5XPV .LFNHG RŕŽ&#x2030; LQWR WKH HYHUJURZLQJ JXVWVRIZLQG Although the ball remained the hands of their opSRQHQWV /6( SUHVHQWHG D XQLŕŽ&#x160;HG GHIHQVLYH IURQW with aggressive line speed and pressure causing 5806WRFRPPLWVHYHUDOHUURUVHDUO\RQ,QDYHLQ attempt to clear their lines, they kicked and found WRXFK'HVSLWHVWHOODUOLIWLQJWHFKQLTXHIURPWKHSURS forwards and dizzyingly deceptive dummy moves by Dickinson, LSE lost the lineout, but a knock-on by DQHUYRXV5806ŕŽ&#x2039;\KDOIMXVWRXWVLGHKLVRZQDO ORZHG(ULNâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ?â&#x20AC;Ź0U/6(â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;Ź7DWHWRVWHSXSDQGFODLPWKH ŕŽ&#x160;UVW SRLQWVRIWKHJDPHIRU/6(FRQYHUWLQJDSHQ DOW\FRPIRUWDEO\GHVSLWHWKHJDOHIRUFHZLQGV Reclaiming the ball from the restart, LSE proceeded to take systematic control over every aspect RI WKH JDPH 7KH EDFNV GHPRQVWUDWHG ZK\ WKHLU team is top of the league with well-timed and orFKHVWUDWHG PRYHV $OWKRXJK WKH\ ZHUH FRQWURYHU sially penalized for a supposed forward pass, they VRRQUHFODLPHGFRQWURO6XQVSDQDSDVV\DUGVWR land plush in the hands of Courtneidge; the ball was RŕŽ? RDGHG LQ FRQWDFW WR &RRNH ZKR GHVSLWH DOPRVW IXPEOLQJVHWXSWKHŕŽ&#x160;UVWSKDVHRIVRPHFKDPSDJQH RŕŽ? RDG SOD\ ZKLFK XQIRUWXQDWHO\ HQGHG LQ /6( EH

LQJKHOGXSRYHUWKHOLQH Not disheartened, LSE maintained pressure DQGKHOG5806LQWKHLURZQ+DUGLQJIHDUOHVVO\ throwing his body in the way of a powerful clearDQFHNLFN5HFODLPLQJSRVVHVVLRQWKH/6(IRUZDUG pack applied overwhelming pressure with repeated FUDVKEDOOFXOPLQDWLQJLQ+DUGLQJVWHDPUROOLQJVHY eral RUMS players over the try line and scoring, 7DWHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV WUXVW\ ERRW HQVXULQJ PD[LPXP SRLQWV ZHUH JDLQHGIURPWKHDWWDFNWR/6( Returning the restart kick, Sun, from deep within WKH /6(  VHQW D EDOO VRDULQJ RYHU 5806 KHDGV FOHDULQJ PRVW RI WKH SLWFK 'HVSLWH D YDOLDQW FKDVH by the back three, such was the force of the kick that WKHEDOOFURVVHGWKH5806GHDGEDOOOLQH6SHFWDWRU 5RE /LWWOH PXVHG WKDW â&#x20AC;ŤÚ?â&#x20AC;ŹLW PXVW KDYH EHHQ WKH QG :HHWDEL[WKDWEURXJKWLWRQâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;Ź7KHEDOOZDVUHWXUQHG to the origin of the kick and unfortunately the scrum that followed ended in a penalty being awarded to 5806LQVLGH/6(â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV&OHDUO\IHHOLQJWKHSUHVVXUH KRZHYHUWKH5806IDLOHGWRFRQYHUWWKHSHQDOW\ DQGSOD\UHVXPHG $V WKH JDPH SURJUHVVHG VFUXP KDOI /X[â&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹV 7RP Daley impressions began to aggravate the spirited crowd, who correctly commented upon his incessant GLYLQJEHLQJGHWULPHQWDOWRKLVSDVVLQJ After a brief interim of clear weather, the snow returned, accompanied by a grim look across RUMS faces as Reed galloped through their defensive line, XQIRUWXQDWHO\ WLSWRHLQJ LQ WR WRXFK 5HWXUQHG WR form, however, the LSE lineout reclaimed possesVLRQ DQG /X[ VHHPLQJO\ ZLVKLQJ WR PDNH D PRUH positive impression upon fans, danced gracefully through the entire opposition pack, gaining plenty RI WHUULWRU\ $OO WKH LQJUHGLHQWV IRU DQRWKHU WU\ DS SHDUHGWREHSUHVHQW)XUWKHUSUHVVXUHIURPWKHIRU wards created a gap the Dasai keenly spotted and H[SORLWHGUXQQLQJWKHEDOOLQWRVFRUH6RPHVD\LW was the wind that caused Tate to unfortunately narURZO\ PLVV WKH FRQYHUVLRQ +RZHYHU RWKHUV KDYH VSHFXODWHGWKDWLWZDVKLVEHPXVHPHQWDW/X[VSLW ting on himself (in celebration of the try?) that dis-

WUDFWHGKLP5HJDUGOHVVWKHVFRUHQRZVWRRGDW WR/6(DVWKHŕŽ&#x160;UVWKDOIHQGHG The start of the second half saw more aggressive forwards play by LSE, at points involving moves ZKHUHVHYHQRIWKHHLJKWIRUZDUGVVWRRGLQWKH FKDQQHO WR KLW XS VKRUW EDOO $OWKRXJK D PRQVWURXV VWHS E\ 2â&#x20AC;Ť&Ú&#x2018;â&#x20AC;ŹRQQRU IROORZHG E\ VRPH TXLFN KDQGV through the pack ended in Dodds being held up over WKHOLQH+DUGLQJVRRQVDZWRLWWKDW/6(HŕŽ&#x2030;RUWVGLG QRW JR XQUHFRJQL]HG DQG VWROH DQRWKHU ŕŽ&#x160;YH SRLQWV IRU/6(WKHWU\WKLVWLPHEHLQJFRQYHUWHG &DSWDLQ +HZHV GHVSLWH FODLPV WKDW KH KDV WZR left feet, displayed further fancy footwork, though unfortunately an interception by RUMS allowed WKHP WR EUHDN DZD\ $OO PD\ KDYH EHHQ ORVW KDG LW not been for a noteworthy chase and tackle by SnorWL ZKR WKHQ VLQJOHKDQGHGO\ ZRQ D UXFN DJDLQVW  5806 IRUZDUGV 7KH WRQH RI WKH PDWFK EHJDQ WR FKDQJHDV/6(VSHQWDQH[WHQGHGSHULRGRIWLPHLQ their own half, attempts at clearing the line seemLQJO\LQYDLQ,IQRWIRUDQRWKHUH[FHOOHQWWU\VDYLQJ tackle in the corner by Sun, points may have been FRQFHGHG Late in the game, several players were forced to OHDYH WKH ŕŽ&#x160;HOG &RRNH GXH WR DQ LQMXUHG KDPVWULQJ DQG /X[ GXH WR D TXHVWLRQDEOH VLQELQQLQJ IRU VXS SRVHGO\ NLFNLQJ DQ RSSRVLWLRQ SOD\HU ,W VHHPHG inevitable that RUMS would slip through the LSE defense late in the game with a scrum on the LSE OLQH+RZHYHUDODWHVXUJHE\/6(DOORZHGWKHPWR escape this and end the game convincingly, if not HQWLUHO\FRPIRUWDEO\ZLWKDŕŽ&#x160;QDOVFRUHRI All in all, this was a solid performance by the LSE VW ;9 DQG LV \HW DQRWKHU H[FHOOHQW UHVXOW LQ ZKDW KDV EHHQ D KLJKO\ VXFFHVVIXO VHDVRQ 1RW HYHU\RQH ZDV RYHUO\ LPSUHVVHG ZLWK WKH PDWFK KRZHYHU Louis Davies, newly elected democracy committee member, stated that â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;some of the decisions in this match were made particularly undemocratically and ,ZLOOEHKDYLQJZRUGVZLWKWKHUHIHUHHâ&#x20AC;ŤÚ&#x2018;â&#x20AC;Ź /6(VW;9UXJE\SOD\WKHLUŕŽ&#x160;QDOPDWFKDJDLQVW *ROGVPLWKVVW;9DZD\WKLV:HGQHVGD\


The Beaver: Week of March 19th, 2013