Role Of Parents In Sexuality Education For Young People In Selected Districts Of Eastern Uganda Jan 2020 AfriYAN-Uganda Chapter QUALITATIVE YOUTH-LED RESEARCH
REPORT
YIYA FOUN DATION
peertopeer Uganda
UGANDA YOUNG POSITIVES LOGO.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS AfriYAN acknowledges the role and contribution of the 12 youth research in the 5 districts of Jinja, Mayuge, Butaleja, Pallisa and Buyende. These were in no particular order; Mary Namususwa Joel Mugabi Conny Nabusimba Joel Bazanya Bwoye Tadeo Isaac Godwin Aisu Bumba Ebyesali Susan Ikareut Enock Malinga Rebecca Achom Esther Namuluta Prossy Ngobi
We further acknowledge the AfriYAN member organisations that oversaw and contributed to the research process through supporting the foundation training, data collection and analysis namely Reach A Hand Uganda (RAHU) Uganda Young positives (UYP) Yiya Foundation Naguru Youth Health Network (NYHN) Peer To Peer Uganda (PEERU) Together Alive Health Initiative (TAHI) Universal Health Development Foundation (UHDF) Visionary Lady Foundation (VLF) We also recognise other members who provided moral support and, Uganda Youth and Adolescent Health Forum (UYAHF) Public Health Ambassadors Uganda (PHAU) Vijana na Children Foundation Uganda (VINACEF) Uganda. Generation of Empowered Youth and Adolescent (GEYA) Uganda Network of Young People Living with HIV (UNYPA) Centre for Youth-Drive Development (CFYDDI) Transgender Equality Uganda (TEU) Allied Youth Initiative (AYI) Other heartfelt gratitude goes to Restless Development Uganda for their constant technical advice and support that has been provided to the network in general for the last four years.
TABLE OF CONTENTS 5
Key Terminologies
6
Executive Summary
12
Background
15
Research Methodology
19
Research Findings
41
Recommendations And Conclusion
KEY TERMINOLOGIES AfriYAN
African Youth and Adolescent Network on population and development
FGD GBV HIV KII MoES MVMR NSEF RAHU RDU SE SRHR UBOS UDHS UNFPA
Focus Group Discussions Gender-based violence Human Immunodeficiency Virus Key Informant Interviews The Ugandan Ministry of Education and Sports My Voice My Rights Programme National Sexuality Education Framework Reach A Hand Uganda Restless Development Uganda Sexuality education Sexual Reproductive Health and Rights Uganda Bureau of Statistics Uganda Demographic Health Survey United Nations Population Fund
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EXECUTIVE SUMMARY The AfriYAN Uganda Chapter In 2016, UNFPA (United Nations Population Fund) initiated AfriYAN (African Youth and Adolescent Network on population and development) to promote meaningful youth participation and advocacy in policy and decision-making processes at national, regional and global levels. Since then, AfriYAN has grown into a strong movement across Eastern, Central and Southern Africa. The AfriYAN Uganda chapter is a registered network that seeks to eliminate Sexual Reproductive Health and Rights (SRHR) related challenges among young people today to ensure that they live a quality life. The Uganda chapter is coordinated by Reach A Hand Uganda. Under the My Voice My Rights (MVMR) Program , which seeks to break the silence on SRHR issues and recognized these services as basic human rights, the network implemented qualitative youthled research with support from 21 youth-led organizations spread across the intervention districts of Mayuge, JInja, Buyende, Pallisa and Butaleja. The research focused on the role of parents in sexuality education.
Research Justification Uganda is experiencing significant sexual and reproductive health challenges such as high cases of teenage pregnancy, early marriage, HIV and gender-based violence in schools and communities. This increasingly threatens the right and access to education by affecting demand and quality of education in the long run (IBID). 1 out of 4 teenage girls is pregnant or has a child by the age of 19 (UDHS 2016), additionally, 1 in every 2 girls is married before the age of 18, 570 young women get infected with HIV every week. The Ugandan Ministry of Education and Sports (MoES) released the National Sexuality Education Framework (NSEF) in 2018 where it recognizes parents and caregivers as those with the primary mandate for the care and upbringing of children. It further recognizes the fact that sexuality education in Uganda was primarily handled by parents and caregivers in the past and that this was however reinforced by
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cultural and religious denominations the family belonged to. The role of parents in SE has over time shown to be reducing due to changing lifestyle whereby both parents are too busy with work and dwindling spaces for parent – child interaction. It is against this background therefore, the MVMR programmes conducted a youth – led research to understand the status quo to give parents and caregivers a platform to share from their own point of views and experiences on what exactly their role in sexuality education currently looks like and how it can improve.
Research Objectives The research had 3 key objectives namely; 1. To find out the content of sexuality education delivered by parents and caregivers to young people between 10 and 19 years; 2. To establish the challenges faced by parents and caregivers in the delivery of sexuality education to young people between 10 to 19 years, and; 3. To establish how parents and caregivers would like to be engaged in young people’s sexuality education by government institutions and other development institutions.
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Research Methodology The research employed a purely qualitative method. We employed the Restless Development youth-led research methodology following the 6 research phases. Using convenient and purposive sampling techniques, Wa total 640 participants, drawn from 5 districts took part in the research through using Focus Group Discussions and Key Informant Interviews which were carefully designed as data collection instruments with open-ended questions that captured the roles, attitudes, perspectives of both parents/caregivers and young people in this respect. The research focused on the role of parents in sexuality education. During the qualitative data analysing process, we employed a deductive approach where broader themes that were generated from where specific themes were constituted which formed the research findings. We developed research briefs specific to the findings from our respective districts. Issues that needed further exploration were presented to the research participants through the districts validation meeting. It was through these meetings that a plan was agreed on a plan to share the final research findings through the national dialogue to ensure that research participants had an opportunity to shape the final research findings.
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Key Findings 1. Young people and their parents each see the other as being too busy to have these kinds of conversations—or as not prioritising them.
“A father in Mayuge District expressed that, “The greatest problem according to me is that parents today make themselves so busy with work and forget that children need to be directed and guided, so children in that sense end up doing whatever they feel or hear they are supposed to do.”
2. Among caretakers we spoke with, the most common challenge they mentioned in talking about sexuality education was feeling that young people in their care do not listen to them—that they are disrespectful.
“Delivering sexuality education is a bit challenging because some disrespect parents. They look at their parents, and they think that what is told to them is useless.”
3. Some caretakers felt that young people do not value their perspectives because they feel that they know more than their caretakers do.
“Sometimes young people have more information. So, when they challenge the parents, the parents think that they are not capable enough to provide sexualiay education.”
- A father in Butaleja District.
- A mother in Butaleja District.
4. According to our respondents, both young people and—to a larger extent—their parents feel shy discussing these sensitive topics with each other, in part because of the “obscene” words they feel they have to use. 5. Some parents expressed that they did not see the value of sexuality education because they perceived that it leads to increased promiscuity, whereas others expressed having to reconcile with these views, even if they did not hold them themselves.
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6. Parents whom we spoke with explained that there are additional challenges in involving fathers and male caretakers in sexuality education, particularly that of their daughters. Fathers and male caretakers explained that they felt particularly uncomfortable in discussing these issues with their daughters.
7. Some young people whom we spoke with explained that they did not feel comfortable discussing these topics with their parents because of the way that their parents communicate with them. A young woman in Butaleja District expressed that
“some parents have poor communication skills which may not help in the provision of sexuality education”.
8. Parents express that even when they are able to deliver sexuality education well, they feel that the pressure that their children get from their peers to act differently negates what they have taught them. A common challenge that parents in every district spoke of was how young people follow the influence of their peers, despite what they do as parents to advise them.
“What you tell a child will not be followed but will be discussed with friends, who will advise them in their own way, contradicting with the information you imparted in your child. They end up following what their peers have told them than what you told them.” - A mother in Mayuge District
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Recommendations and conclusions 1. There’s an urgent need for parents to be sensitised on the importance of sexuality education. This is because most parents do have negative perceptions about sexuality education which many see as promoting promiscuity among young people. 2. There is a need for parents/caretakers to create safe spaces that encourages open communication with young people such as treating them with respect and building close relationships that promotes two-way communication. 3. There’s need to sensitise parents/or caretakers about “Children’s rights” as provided for in the constitution of the republic of Uganda and their enforcement - so that these are not misinterpreted to mean that children are “untouchable” and that parents do not have the right and power to guide and engage children in conversations on sexuality education. 4. Young people are influenced by their peers despite the efforts of parents in delivering sexuality education and so there is a need for parents to identify and leverage on the potential of peer influence and ensure that these are redirected into positive influence so that parents can reinforce the messages they want to pass on to those in their care. 5. There’s a need to develop standard guidelines on sexuality education with appropriate vocabulary (in the local dialect), which are well packaged to suit the young people’s information needs that can guide parents while delivering sexuality education to young people. This will make parents more comfortable engaging children on Sexuality Education as opposed to the existing perceived obscenity of the words used in Sexuality Education.
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BACKGROUND In 2016, UNFPA (United Nations Population Fund) initiated AfriYAN (African Youth and Adolescent Network on population and development) to promote meaningful youth participation and advocacy in policy and decision-making processes at national, regional and global levels. Since then, AfriYAN has grown into a strong movement across Eastern, Central and Southern Africa. The AfriYAN Uganda chapter is a registered network that seeks to eliminate Sexual Reproductive Health and Rights (SRHR) related challenges among young people today to ensure that they live a quality life.
The My Voice My Rights (MVMR) program The MVMR Programme was launched in 2015, with a goal of breaking the silence on SRHR issues and recognized these services as basic human rights. The program is implemented in Uganda in partnership with AfriYAN (A network of 21 youth-led and youth serving organisations and Reach A Hand Uganda (RAHU) as its coordinating entity. It aims at increasing the number of young people who have access to SRHR services information at a local level and focuses on advocacy and policy at both local and national level.
Justification of the Research Uganda is experiencing significant sexual and reproductive health challenges such as high cases of teenage pregnancy, early marriage, HIV and gender-based violence in schools and communities (Uganda National Sexuality Education Framework, 2018). This increasingly threatens the right and access to education by affecting demand and quality of education in the long run (IBID). According to Uganda Bureau of Statistics (UBOS) 2017 and Uganda Demographic and Health Survey 2016, Uganda is paying greater attention to youth through its public policy initiatives however, young people still confront many obstacles that prevent them from having a safe transition into adulthood. For example; 1 out of 4 teenage girls in Uganda is pregnant or has a child by the age of 19, 3 out of 4 children who start primary school never make it to secondary school, 22% of
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secondary school students (aged 13-18) leave school before finishing, 1 in every 2 girls is married before the age of 18, 570 young women get infected with HIV every week, high HIV prevalence rates among young people: 3.7% for females and 2.3% for males. The Ugandan Ministry of Education and Sports (MoES) released the National Sexuality Education Framework in 2018 where it recognizes parents and caregivers as those with the primary mandate for the care and upbringing of children. The framework further recognizes the fact that sexuality education in Uganda was primarily handled by parents and caregivers in the past and that this was however reinforced by cultural and religious denominations the family belonged to. The framework also recognizes parents as caregivers as one of the key stakeholders with the mandate of delivering sexuality education to young people to prepare, empower and support equip them with the appropriate information, skills and tools that will enable young people and adolescents to make safe and healthy decisions about their lives. Several media reports and anecdotal data have however, shown over time that the role of parents in sexuality education and general upbringing of their young ones is increasingly weakening mainly due to changing lifestyle whereby both parents are too busy with work and dwindling spaces for parent – child interaction. It is against this background therefore, the MVMR programmes conducted a youth – led research to understand the status quo. Parents and caregivers were offered a platform to share from their own point of views and experiences on what exactly their role in sexuality education currently looks like and how it can improve.
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Research Objectives 1. To find out the content of sexuality education delivered by parents and caregivers to young people between 10 and 19 years. 2. To establish the challenges faced by parents and caregivers in the delivery of sexuality education to young people between 10 to 19 years. 3. To establish how parents and caregivers would like to be engaged in young people’s sexuality education by government institutions and other development institutions.
Key Research Questions 1. What information do parents and caregivers provide while delivering sexuality education to young people between 10 and 19 years? 2. What challenges do parents and caregivers face while delivering sexuality education to young people between 10 to 19 years? 3. How would parents and caregivers like to be engaged in young people’s sexuality education by government institutions and other development institutions?
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RESEARCH METHODOLOGY The research employed a purely qualitative method which explored the views and perspectives of parents/caregivers and young people about the role of parents in sexuality education. We employed the Restless Development youth-led research methodology following the 6 stages of the research process such as; setting the framework; designing the questions; Collecting the data; Analysing the findings; conducting validation exercises; and Sharing to catalyse discussion and Action. We carefully designed data collection instruments with open-ended questions that captured the roles, attitudes, perspectives of both parents/caregivers and young people in this respect.
Figure 1: The Youth-led Research Methodology Research Focus This report provides an opportunity for all stakeholders to have a better understanding of the role of parents in sexuality education through capturing the views and perspectives of parents/caregivers and young people. A lot of research in this area has focused much on the role of other players including government, civil society and religious leaders in sexuality education, leaving out parents who spend most of their time with their children with a lot of influence on what children learn, believe and practice on a daily basis. Additionally, our previous research focused on the causes of early marriages in the Eastern districts of Uganda, and the research findings offered compelling evidence of how influential parents/ caregivers are in the lives of children and this formed the basis of this year’s research focus.
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Through this research, we wanted to understand parents’ understanding of sexuality and what parents talk about when delivering sexuality education to their children, the challenges they face in delivering it and how well they could be supported to effectively deliver the information to their young people in their care. The research also captured the perspectives of young people on the same as what they know about sexuliaty education, their perceptions?, where they have accessed the SE information and from whom they got the information.
Youth Researcher’s Foundation training We attended a foundation training that was conducted based on the Restless Development youth-led research methodology, where we acquired a wide range of research skills including; conducting interviews and Focus Group Discussions (FGDs), and other skills such as; advocacy, communication, community mobilisation and engagement, sexual reproductive Health and Rights (SRHR), leadership, among others. During the training, we reviewed the research instruments (FGD guides) and tested them to ensure they were in line with the research framework.
Research Design, Sampling and Data Collection By design, our study is purely qualitative given the nature of our research questions and focus. This strategy provides a rich, detailed picture of parents and young people’s experiences and perspectives in question. By employing convenient and purposive sampling techniques, data was collected using Focus Group Discussions (FGD) and Key Informant Interviews (KIIs) for both parents/caregivers and young people. Whilst the general experiences were captured during the FGDs, KIIs aimed at capturing personal experiences regarding how they perceive and understand sexiality education for young people (10-19). During the Focus Group Discussions, we convened separate discussions for males and females in FGDs to ensure it was a safe space for everyone to interact during the discussions and given the fact that FGDs involved discussing “sensitive” issues.
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Table 1: Qualitative Respondents Category
N
Male
Female
Total
Focus Group Discussions Young people
20
150
150
300
Focus Group Discussions for Parents/Caregivers
20
150
150
300
Key Informant Interviews - Young People
20
10
10
20
Key Informant Interviews - for Parents
20
10
10
20
320
320
640
Total
Based on the above table (summary), A total of 640 participants took part in the research and we had equal numbers in terms of Focus Group Discussions and Key Informant Interviews for both young people and the parents/caregivers. We facilitated every FGD in a team of 2 researchers for every district and hence, these were both recorded in the FGD notebooks as well and electronically recorded using voice recorders. This ensured that we don’t miss out any details during the conversations. The electronically recorded data was then transcribed and compared with the written notes in this regard to ensure no details were omitted from the discussions.
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Data Analysis
During the qualitative data analysing process, we employed a deductive approach where broader themes were generated from the data and later broken down into specific themes which constituted the research findings. Before we embarked on data analysis, data was entered, transcribed and cleaned to ensure it was consistent, rich and detailed. We then coded data based on the key research questions and framework. We analysed the coded data to identify patterns from the data that were transformed into research themes. For all the themes generated, we verified to ensure that they had a strong basis from the primary data. We then described in more detail to make clear connections with the sub-themes which formed the basis of our report.
Data validation We developed research briefs specific to the findings from our respective districts. We thereafter, identified issues that we needed to explore in more detail from the respondents and then held district validation and dissemination meetings, where we presented preliminary findings to the participants. We agreed and developed a plan to share the final findings through the national dialogue to ensure that research participants had an opportunity to shape the final research findings.
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RESEARCH FINDINGS Some young people explain that their parents do not speak to them about sexuality education. As a young woman in Jinja District expressed, “our parents do not often talk to us about sexuality education”. Some parents say the same. A father in Jinja District stated that “me, as a parent, I have never taught my child sexuality education”. What explains this gap? Why is it that sometimes these discussions between parents and their children do not happen? The discussion below highlights the multiple barriers on both sides that get in the way of parents and their children having these discussions
together. 1. Young people and their parents each see the other as being too busy to have these kinds of conversations—or as not prioritising them. Young people in every district explained that their parents and caretakers often lack the time to have these conversations with them. A young woman in Buyende District summarised this discussion simply by saying, “some parents lack time”. Below are some selected quotations from young people expressing a similar perspective:
“It can even take a year before our parents talk to us about our sexuality.” - A young woman in Pallisa District “Some parents never be with their children. So, they have not changed to be told.” - A young woman in Pallisa District “Parents are very busy and don’t have time to teach us such sessions.” - A young man in Jinja District “Some parents are busy with work. So, they don’t know about [our] sexuality education.” - A young woman in Pallisa District “Some parents are too committed to their work, leaving the young people in the hands of elder sisters and brothers. So, by the time the parents get home, when [sic] all the children are sleeping.” - A young woman in Butaleja District “Our fathers wake up early for work and are back home late at night. After work, [they are] tired, and so they have no time” - A young woman in Jinja District 19 | QUALITATIVE YOUTH-LED RESEARCH REPORT
As seen above, in most of their perspectives, young people attributed this lack of time to the demands that their parents’ work places on them. Parents whom we spoke with had similar criticism of other parents. A father in Mayuge District expressed that, “The greatest problem according to me is that parents today make themselves so busy with work and forget that children need to be directed and guided, so children in that sense end up doing whatever they feel or hear they are supposed to do.”
While a mother in Butaleja District stated that parents do not have enough time to speak to their children about sex because poverty leads them to “spend a lot of time in the gardens, and by the time they get back home, they are tired, and also they don’t know what has been taking place at home”. Other parents show a self-critical perspective whereby they acknowledged that juggling work and home life is a problem they face themselves. For example, a father in Mayuge District said, “I for one, am a family person with children. However, I never get enough time to interact with my children due to my tight work schedule.” Some parents attribute this difficulty of juggling work and home life to a need to prioritise work, where their financial system requires them to. As a father in Mayuge District explained, “poverty has limited us from teaching and having time for children” because it requires him to focus on seeking an income. A mother in Butaleja likewise explained that it is “challenging for single parents who don’t have good stable jobs because we leave children at home to go look for some small money”, which cuts into the time they could be spending discussing issues like these. However, parents also expressed that the young people in their care likewise do not have the time for these kind of conversations. A father in Buyende District attributed this to school schedules, stating that “our children have no time to spend at home” because of school schedules that mandate study on Saturday—which overlaps with when working parents are at home and available for these conversations. A mother in the same district explained a similar constraint, saying, “time to spend with our children is no more because they are ever in [sic] school, and the only day they have is Sunday, which we also use and take them to gardens [sic]”.
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Other parents simply explain that their children do not have much time at home. As a father in Pallisa District explained, “we don’t have time to mobilize for this counseling [with our children] because most of the youths are engaged in their activities”. While there is undoubtedly a lot of pressure on both parents’ and young people’s time, a good follow-up question to pose would be: But do they make time for these discussions? While isolated in responses, some young people and some parents both felt that attributing this to time pressures is not exactly representative of the full picture. Instead, they felt that there are instances where the other party is simply feigning being busy. A young woman in Butaleja District explained further: “Some parents don’t have enough time with young people due to their nature of work, and yet some others, even when they are at home, they pretend to be serious doing nothing, instead of creating time to talk to young people about sexuality education.” Parents in both Buyende and Pallisa Districts had the same perspective— but of young people. As a mother in the latter claimed, “most of the youths pretend they are busy so they don’t have time to listen to such information”. In the perspective of these parents, their children are not actually too busy but instead use this as an excuse to avoid talking about these topics. Therefore, the challenge of not being able to create time for these conversations is not purely logistical. Instead, whether or not statements that the other party simply appears to be more busy than they are accurate, both of the perceptions suggest that these conversations are not prioritised over other tasks. In the end, it is not just about having the time talk about sex, it is about making the time for it. From these perspectives alone, it is not possible to differentiate how much of the lack of prioritisation is due to not finding these conversations to be important and how much is due to whether these conversations are seen as positive and productive—or as uncomfortable and therefore something to dread. While most respondents—parents and young people alike—did express that sexuality education is important, both highlighted several other challenges that get in the way of these conversations. So, perhaps it is more the former than the latter.
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2. Some caretakers whom we spoke with felt that young people in their care do not listen to them when they share their perspectives on sex education and therefore felt that these perspectives were not valued. Among caretakers we spoke with, the most common challenge they mentioned in talking about sexuality education was feeling that young people in their care do not listen to them—that they are disrespectful. While not every caretaker felt this way, this feeling was common across caretakers in all districts. Below are some selected quotations from parents who expressed feeling this way: “Our children disrespect us. You tell them what to do, but they don’t listen to what you tell them.” - A mother in Jinja District “Children today are disrespectful to their parents, and so they don’t just listen to their parents.” - A female caretaker in Mayuge District “Delivering sexuality education is a bit challenging because some disrespect parents. They look at their parents, and they think that what is told to them is useless.” - A father in Butaleja District “I talk to them and tell them to stay away from sex and instead concentrate on studies, but they don’t listen. I think it’s because of stubbornness.” - A father in Pallisa District
These parents are not alone. Others—whose words are not represented above—also echoed this feeling. Young people whom we spoke with likewise acknowledged that this can be a challenge among some of their peers—specifically, “underlooking [sic] our parents and undermining them by us children”, as a young woman in Buyende District explained. Though none expressed doing this themselves, a young woman in Mayuge District said, “some children are disrespectful to their parents. They do not have time to listen to their parents, and at times they just ignore what is being talked about.” Other young people reciprocated this impression. Parents who expressed feeling this way explained that this did not just result in an uncomfortable conversation but instead in feeling that their perspective was not valued. A mother in Butaleja District explained, “Some children think that they are too big to be talked to. So, they are difficult to be sat [sic] down for advice and be taught. Actually, they don’t value the information you are giving them.” This mother equated what she perceived as a disrespectful attitude with not seeing the value in what she had to say. 22 | QUALITATIVE YOUTH-LED RESEARCH REPORT
However, not feeling valued does not mean that parents find these conversations invaluable. Instead, those who do feel that some of their children have listened feel that it has been beneficial. A female caretaker in Jinja District further explained that “young people do not want to listen to us, but those that [sic] listened to us have changed”. Where they do find a receptive audience, parents express finding these conversations to be impactful. These parents value these conversations; they simply wonder whether the young people whom they care for feel the same way. Beyond not feeling valued, some parents who felt this way explained that this is why they felt another actor should take on this role. For example, a father in Pallisa District explained, “we as parents have been trying to advise our children, but the children have been hard-headed, and that’s why we are suggesting maybe the Local Council 1 should get involved, because we are defeated”. Listening to this challenge, it is not enough to say that young people should simply respect their parents and their elders—or that another actor should take on this responsibility. If indeed disrespect is a problem, it is more significant to identify where it comes from and to support parents to respond to these root causes. This is a gap that a father in Butaleja District identified himself saying, “some children do not want to listen to their elders, and parents also lack proper approaches of handling this”. As he recognises, there are two sides to the situation: not just improving how young people respond to their parents but also equipping parents with the tools and skills to have these conversations with those in their care. 23 | QUALITATIVE YOUTH-LED RESEARCH REPORT
3. While both parents and young people acknowledge that there are gaps in their parents’ understanding of what to teach and how to teach it, both identify that sometimes young people dismiss their parents’ perspectives not because of this but instead because of viewing their parents as outdated or uneducated. Some caretakers felt that young people do not value their perspectives because they feel that they know more than their caretakers do. Below are some selected quotations from parents who expressed feeling this way:
“Young people can’t accept what you are telling them because they think they know better.” - A mother in Jinja District. “Our children even [sic] don’t listen or even just ignore what you have to tell them. Their understanding is beyond us sometimes. So, they take what they know to be more important than what we tell them.” - A female caretaker in Mayuge District. “Sometimes young people have more information. So, when they challenge the parents, the parents think that they are not capable enough to provide sexualiay education.” - A mother in Butaleja District “The greatest challenge is that these young people already know a lot. So, telling them what we feel they should know, they instead make fun of whatever you tell them, however much you try [un]packing it.” - A father in Mayuge District
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In some cases, this may be accurate, speaking to a gap that some parents identified themselves— that they actually do not have enough information on the topic. As one parent described, “most of us have received no information on sexuality education”. Parents whom we spoke with identified three areas where they felt they had gaps in their awareness: 1) on what their role is, 2) on what to discuss with their children, and 3) on how to do so, as shown below:
On what their role is: As a father in Jinja District explained, “parents do not know where their rights and limits as parents are in training their children”. Without knowing what their role is, parents are unable to deliver on it. They must first be made aware of this. On what to discuss with their children: A father in Mayuge District emphasized that some parents “lack knowledge about sexuality education and on words concerning this. They don’t know what to talk about with their children”. To deliver on their role in teaching their children about sex, parents must know what to talk about and which words to use when talking about them. On how to do so: A mother in Buyende District explained that “sometimes we parents lack [the] basic information to base on while teaching sexualityrelated topics and how to address them.’’ The second part of what she says is key—that it is not only important for parents to know what to say but how to say it. They must also be trained and supported in understanding the best ways to deliver this message.
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Young people also expressed the feeling that their parents and caretakers “lack adequate knowledge about sexuality education and don’t know what to tell their children”, as a young woman in Mayuge District said. Another young man reciprocated this view, stating that “some parents are ignorant about sexuality education. They don’t have any meaningful information to give their children”. While these young people perceived their parents as having a general lack of knowledge on the topic, others reciprocated the same gaps that their parents identified, as shown below: On what their role is: As a young man in Butaleja District expressed, “some parents feel it is not their right to share with their children about sexuality education and that is why they get ashamed talking to us”. On what to discuss with their children: A young woman in Butaleja District explained that “sometimes parents lack some information when asked different questions”. While they might have information on the overall topic, parents might not have enough detailed knowledge to field more specific questions. On how to do so: A young man in Mayuge District explained that parents and caretakers “lack knowledge of how, when, and where to carry out sexuality education”. Even if they have the information on the topic, parents need to know how to deliver it.
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However, it is more complicated than whether or not parents and caretakers have this information—and whether those in their care recognize it. Both young people and their parents identified that whether young people listen to their parents on these topics also has to do with whether they perceive their parents’ knowledge to be accurate and relevant. Young people whom we spoke with explained why they and their peers disregarded their caretakers’ perspectives and instead feel that they know more: While their caretakers might have knowledge of sex, that that knowledge is not relevant to their current context. As a young woman in Mayuge District explained, young people “believe parents have nothing they know much [sic] nowadays and what they know is already old fashioned in the [sic] modern society”. In particular, young people referenced parents’ and caretakers’ perspectives as being “outdated”. A young man in Butaleja District explained that some of his peers “think that their parents are “outdated” and therefore don’t know anything, so have [sic] got no [sic] rights to speak to them”. Other young people echoed this perspective, including describing their parents’ views as “outdated”. A young woman in Butaleja District explained that some “children who do not listen to their parent’s advice, they think they know more than their parents and that their parents are outdated”. A young woman in Mayuge District likewise expressed that her peers “feel their parents are actually ignorant of these things or their views are outdated. They therefore do not listen to what their parents tell them since they already have a negative attitude.” In all of these young people’s opinions, then, their peers dismiss what their caretakers have to say about sex when they are not reflective of the modern context that they feel they are currently in. This is something parents themselves recognise. A mother in a focus group discussion in Pallisa expressed that when she wanted to talk to her children about sex, they replied “ ‘you are old now. What do you know?’ ” In her experience, being dismissed because of her age was discouraging. She was not alone. A father in Pallisa District described that his children do not listen dismissing what he has to say and explaining that “when you say anything, they say that this is the era of dotcom”.
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Another father in Mayuge District explained feeling that young people “feel their parents’ ideas are of old age and theirs are actually ‘styled up’”. Other caretakers whom we spoke with also felt that sometimes their perspectives on sex were similarly dismissed but for other reasons— particularly, when they were not educated. A mother in Butaleja explained that she did not feel comfortable talking to those in her care about sex because “sometimes children scare us, like they say ‘Who are you to start talking to me? First of all, you didn’t study to reach far.’ “ While this dismissal might not be isolated to conversations about sex specifically, it does constrain how comfortable she feels discussing sex with those in her care. She was not alone. Another mother in Butaleja District explained, “sometimes the parents can be illiterate but try to educate their children [about sex]. When they sensitize young people under [sic] look at them saying, ‘you who never went to school, what can you also say?.’” As with the other mother, the critique she feels that young people give of their parents is more general, but it gives them additional pause in a subject that is already more uncomfortable to talk about. A young woman in Buyende District whom we spoke with reciprocated this view of her peers, explaining that young people can “undermine [their] parents, saying that they did not go to school so they are not informed”. In her perspective, young people may indeed equate a caretaker’s lack of formal education with a lack of capacity to educate their children on sex specifically—although these things are not equitable in practice. However, while this young woman also perceived that her peers might dismiss their parents’ perspectives on sex for this reason, no young person whom we spoke with expressed holding this view themselves. This does not mean that parents’ and caretakers’ concerns are any less valid, but that instead they might be misplaced, particularly when it comes to anticipating how those in their care will receive what they have to say. Perhaps the challenge is not whether young people dismiss the perspectives of their parents and caretakers on sex but instead on addressing parents concerns—addressing their feelings of how they are perceived. If they are seen as irrelevant in a modern context, how can we support them to be more relevant? If they are seen as less educated, how can we support them to be perceived as well educated on this topic at least?
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4. According to our respondents, both young people and—to a larger extent— their parents feel shy discussing these sensitive topics with each other, in part because of the “obscene” words they feel they have to use. Caretakers whom we spoke with identified that the young people in their care are often uncomfortable talking about sex with them. As a mother in Mayuge District explained, “some children are shy”. Another mother expanded on this to say, “Most of the youths have failed to talk about their body changes [...], and they feel shy when talking about it because, when they talk about it, they say it is a shame”. Some parents explained that the reservation their children had on speaking about the issue made it more difficult for them to initiate these discussions. A mother in Butaleja District further explained that “some children are too quiet and reserved [on these issues] that the parents always feel they have nowhere to begin from [when] talking to them”. While it might be hard for young people to talk about these issues with their parents, both young people and their caretakers spoke more frequently about how they perceived a different group to be uncomfortable with the subject matter— their parents. Some parents themselves acknowledged that they “feel uncomfortable talking to young people—that [there is] shyness when teaching”, as a mother in Jinja District described it. Another mother in Mayuge District stated the same feeling—though in different words—saying that parents are
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“unable to talk to their children because of fear and shyness”. In the perspective of other parents, this “shyness” is specifically related to the sensitivity of some of the subject matter. As a mother in Butaleja District explained, “certain information can’t be easily talked out [sic]. Parents sometimes feel shy to speak deep [sic] things concerning sex.” Caretakers were not alone in recognising this challenge. Young people themselves identified that their caretakers are not comfortable discussing these topics. As a young man in Butaleja District expressed, “Some parents fear us. They get ashamed speaking to us about sexual issues. So, fear is the biggest challenge I think my parents face while delivering sexuality education to us young people.”
A young woman in Jinja District reciprocated this view, saying that “parents fear to talk about such things like sexuality education. They feel shy talking about it.” Other young people reciprocated this view. As a young woman in Mayuge District explained, “In my view, some parents are shy when it comes to speaking to their children about their sexuality. For instance, one time I asked my mom why she does not speak to us about such topics, and she instead asked me, ‘Don’t they tell you these things as school? Don’t you have other friends that you can share with?“
In this young woman’s perspective, her mother’s attempt to displace the conversation and the suggestion that her daughter seek others to speak about these issues with led her daughter to believe that she herself was not comfortable speaking about these issues. Why do parents feel uncomfortable speaking about these issues? In part because of cultural norms. As a father in Jinja District explained, “culturally we don’t feel comfortable talking to them. Instead, we leave them to learn from their peers”. When parents and caretakers reflected on why they do not feel comfortable talking about these topics with their children, they often explained that this was because of the words used to talk about them. They lamented that there is a “lack of clear and explainable words to use” and that there is a challenge with some words in particular because “they look to be obscene”, as two mothers in Buyende District 30 | QUALITATIVE YOUTH-LED RESEARCH REPORT
respectively explained. However, it is not just their parents and caretakers who see these words as inappropriate. The perceived obscenity of these words is something young people also spoke about. A young woman in Jinja District stated that “many times our parents fear to teach us sexuality education because some words and practices are referred to as obscene and, therefore, unacceptable to us young people”. In particular, young people mentioned that their peers also often see these words and topics in that light. A young woman in Buyende District explained that “some other young people see it as obscene, those words meaning sex”. A father in Mayuge District went further to explain in detail how the words used when talking sex make for a less comfortable conversation: “Sometimes the language and packaging of the words to speak with these children become a challenge. Some words, if plainly spoken in Lusoga, are so naked and plain that speaking about them is actually hard [sic] to be told to a child by a parent. Parents therefore opt to using [sic] sugar-coated words, while speaking to young people to refer to certain words which young people may not understand.”
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According to his father, it is not just about whether he feels comfortable to use these words with his children, it is also about whether his children feel comfortable hearing them—or if they even know what they mean. Therefore, it can be uncomfortable for parents to use specific words when talking about sex. A mother in Pallisa District explained that she “fears” using some words with her children, saying, “For example, when you are talking about a private part, they know which part exactly you are talking about”. While using these words make her feel uneasy, arguably, it is important for young people to clearly understand what their parents are talking about. A mother in Jinja District explained that she gets around this challenge by “teaching using myths [and] sayings”. However, this can cause confusion or frustration for those young people at the receiving end of this message. As a young man in Buyende District complained, “some parents are not direct; they just beat around the bush”. Without direct language, is the message so clear? 5. Some parents expressed that they did not see the value of sexuality education because they perceived that it leads to increased promiscuity, whereas others expressed having to reconcile with these views, even if they did not hold them themselves. Several parents described a perception that they—or other parents— have that when children are taught about sex, it encourages them to have it. As a father in Butaleja District expressed, “I don’t feel comfortable talking to young ones about sexuality education because I will be imparting bad characters in them. This is because a child will be sensitized about everything done in the bedroom; so will start practicing them”. A male caretaker in Pallisa District explained that this was a common cultural view, saying that there are; “some cultural practices or norms that take sharing about sexuality has shame [sic]...They believe when they talk about sexuality education with children they get spoilt, since they get new ideas of going to try what they have been told”.
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While this father does not directly say that he holds this view, in his perception, cultural norms delimit how much parents can speak to their children about sex because of precisely this reason—that it could encourage them to have it. For parents that feel teaching sexuality education leads to negative outcomes, it is not just that they feel children will have sex earlier; it is also that they feel children will share this information with their peers. As a father in Pallisa District expressed, “they [parents] don’t talk about it with young people because if they had got it at an early age, they would easily pass on this information”. Parents who do not have these perceptions themselves explain that they still have to deal with other parent’s negative perceptions of teaching young people about sex. A mother in Buyende District explained, “some members think you’re sensitising children to become prostitutes”. As another female caretaker in Mayuge District similarly expressed, that “parents don’t just [sic] understand the whole thing of sexuality education, and they will always try their best to oppose you because they think you are actually spoiling your children when you talk of sexuality issues”.
Irrespective of their own opinions, these mothers must contend with those of other parents. So, improving sex education outcomes would require not only supporting those parents who do want to teach the young people in their care but instead must target building broader awareness in communities of why it is important to teach these things. For parents to teach their children, they need not only be supported on how to deliver 33 | QUALITATIVE YOUTH-LED RESEARCH REPORT
the message. They also need to be supported to understand the importance of doing so. Instead of perceiving talking about sex as encouraging it, they need to be shown how talking about it helps young people make informed choices and how it can help them protect themselves. Any programme of supporting young people to have these discussions will be ineffective without first addressing these perceptions. 6. Parents whom we spoke with explained that there are additional challenges in involving fathers and male caretakers in sexuality education, particularly that of their daughters. Fathers and male caretakers explained that they felt particularly uncomfortable in discussing these issues with their daughters. A father in Buyende District explained that, “as fathers, we always feel ashamed in talking to our daughters and other female relatives during their adolescent changes”. In part, this is because doing so is considered inappropriate according to cultural norms. As a father in Jinja District explained, “For us in Busoga, it is against our culture. We take a girl child as an in-law, and we leave it to the children themselves and learning from one another”. Whereas other parents did not interpret this cultural norm to imply that children should be left alone to learn from each other, others did reference it. Another father in Jinja District similarly explained that “we become shy to speak out some words, most especially to girls, because they are our in-laws”. For some fathers, it is less that cultural norms dictate that they should not speak to their daughters about sexuality education and more that they do not feel they could do it as much justice as a mother could because she has more similar experiences. Another father in Mayuge District expanded on this feeling, saying, “As a father, it becomes hard to us to counsel a girl child on some issues on their body changes...Even if I may [explain them], but I cannot demonstrate for her, as a mother does it well and in a professional manner, the same way the female parent cannot talk to her son about certain issues.”
For this father, then, discussing these issues becomes difficult across gender divides, irrespective of the parent’s gender. While they have knowledge of these issues, they might not be able to explain them as well or create the same safe space. Some fathers explained that this is not specific to their female children,
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but that, instead, it is not their role to speak to young people about these topics. A father in Buyende District mentioned that “culturally it is not advisable for we male parents to speak and teach our children such topics”. As another father in the same district explained further, saying, “mothers tend to shun [sic] their husbands talking to the children [about sex] because they feel a father is not supposed to talk to the children, both boys and girls”. However, both some fathers and some mothers recognized the value of bringing fathers voices into the discussion as well. A father in Mayuge District expressed, “Today, fathers do not mind their children because they believe that it is the mothers’ responsibility to do the child bearing [including sexuality education, and yet children seem to fear and attach more respect to the father than they do to the mother because a father’s voice is a command of authority. So, fathers also have to take part in this.”
In this father’s perspective, male caretakers do not often get involved in these discussions because they associate this activity with being the mother’s responsibility, as with other primary parenting tasks. However, he highlights that there is a distinct value in involving fathers in these conversations because of the weight their voice brings in reinforcing the messages, stressing that they should be more involved. Some mothers lament the lack of paternal involvement in their children’s sexuality education. A female caretaker in Jinja District stated that “women are only providing sexuality education to young people”. Another mother in Butaleja District explained 35 | QUALITATIVE YOUTH-LED RESEARCH REPORT
why this is a challenge, saying, “sometimes the women are the only key players, and the children get familiar with them, which calls for the male voice as a sign of more emphasis, but fathers have no or less time for their children”. 7. For the young people whom we spoke with, how comfortable they felt speaking about sex was a product of the tone set by their parents in their relationship—whether it was open and trusting as opposed to tough and authoritarian. Some young people whom we spoke with explained that they did not feel comfortable discussing these topics with their parents because of the way that their parents communicate with them. A young woman in Butaleja District expressed that “some parents have poor communication skills which may not help in the provision of sexuality education”. Other young people explained in further detail how their parents’ style of interacting with them impacts how openly they share with their parents. A young woman in Buyende District explained that “some parents face problems because they disrespect their children”. What does this disrespect look like in practice? Young people explained that when parents take a tough, authoritarian approach, this impacts how comfortable they feel discussing these issues. A young woman in Butaleja District stated that “some parents have tough faces which fails their children from answering freely”. Another young woman in the same district reciprocated this feeling, saying that “parents are too tough that young people don’t feel free to express themselves”. For both of these young women, this makes them feel uneasy opening up to their parents on what is already a sensitive topic for both parties. This is particularly the case for those young people who describe that parents take an authoritarian approach to the topic, where they set the parameters of the conversation and expect that children only listen. A young woman in Pallisa District lamented that “parents should reduce on [sic] being tough and judging children,” saying that “they never allow you to explain your part of the story”. Similarly, a young woman in Butaleja District expressed that “parents are not patient enough so they end up being hated by the children because most parents dictate the way and direction upon [sic] which the children should go”. For both of these young people, an
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authoritarian relationship where parents lay down rules rather than creating space for discussion not only renders these conversations more difficult but also eroders their relationship overall. This is particularly relevant to when young people go against their parent’s advice. A young woman in Pallisa District mentioned that “children, when they make mistakes, instead of guiding them, parents start insulting them.’’ Irrespective of how well the message was delivered, young people will not follow it perfectly. How parents deal with them is significant: What young people ask for is guidance and the room to make mistakes. What young people we spoke with asked for is a friendly, open environment where they can feel heard—but not every young person describes finding that same approach taken by their caretakers. A young woman explained that “some parents are not loving, kind, and friendly, yet young people feel they should share their information to [sic] friendly people”. Another reciprocated this saying, “some parents have never created that friendly environment”. Do parents recognise this need? Perhaps not always well enough. When explaining their challenges that they faced in delivering sexuality education to their children, some parents lamented that greater emphasis on child rights had impacted their ability to manage their children’s sexuality education. For some parents, this has meant that “children today do not obey parents”, as a father in Buyende District claimed. A father in Mayuge District similarly explained that young people “got their freedom so each child behaves in his or her own way, because of
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children’s rights”. However, where parents have really felt the impact of the increased attention on children’s rights is not as much on how young people make decisions but instead on what parents are able to do when children act contrary to how they feel they should. A father in Pallisa District explained that “because the government says don’t hit children, and the government has given privileges to children, you cannot even discipline the children”. He was not alone. A father in Mayuge District explained that the ability to jail a parent for using corporal punishment to discipline their children “leads us as parents to withdraw from talking to our children”. Another father in Pallisa District similarly described how enforcement of child’s rights laws gave him pause when discussing these issues, saying that because parents can now be imprisoned for assault cases, “the law is making it hard for parents to pass messages”. However, it is not that the emphasis on children’s rights means that parents cannot pass messages to their children; it is that they cannot do so in harsh physical ways. But this is not the only way to pass messages to those in their care. Parents need to investigate new ways of delivering teses messages. A father in Buyende District complained that this “freedom caused [sic] by the government to the children has reduced our roles”. Perhaps these laws have made it so that parents are not able to punish their children for going against their rules in the ways that they are used to. However, to see this as reducing a parent’s role suggests a very limited understanding of what the role of a parent is—to lay down the law and discipline transgressors. What about being a source of wisdom and guidance, acting more as a mentor or trusted confidant? A female caretaker in Butaleja District described how she tries to help those in her care feel more comfortable about talking about sex, saying, “Some children have fear on [sic] how to express themselves to their parents. So, I try to be so friendly, loving, and caring so that I get them out of fear. Sometimes, I try to put myself in their shoes by seeing that we were [once] like that.”
This caretaker tries to create a safe and open space, structured on empathy, to help reduce the discomfort that those in her care feel in talking about these sensitive issues. She was the only such caretaker 38 | QUALITATIVE YOUTH-LED RESEARCH REPORT
to describe how she intentionally creates a positive environment, but others could follow her help their children feel more comfortable in openly speaking about these issues. Talking about sensitive subjects with authority figures is no easy thing. It requires a safe, non-judgemental space, predicated on a relationship of mutual trust. This speaks not only to how the conversation is held but also to the basis of the relationship that caretakers have built over time with those in their care. Caretakers must intentionally invest in building this relationship and setting this tone for those in their care to share openly with them. 8. Parents express that even when they are able to deliver sexuality education well, they feel that the pressure that their children get from their peers to act differently negates what they have taught them. A common challenge that parents in every district spoke of was how young people follow the influence of their peers, despite what they do as parents to advise them. Below are some selected quotations from parents who expressed feeling this way:
“Bad peer groups also influence them, making them not hear us while delivering such sessions.” - A mother in Jinja District “Some children fail to listen to what their parents are telling them, and they sometimes decide to [do what] their peers advice.” - A mother in Buyende District “What you tell a child will not be followed but will be discussed with friends, who will advise them in their own way, contradicting with the information you imparted in your child. They end up following what their peers have told them than what you told them.” - A mother in Mayuge District “These children move in groups. So you counsel a child and tell her the dangers of something, but as she meets with the group members, she discusses it, and yet it’s what the group might be doing. At the end of it, they will just encourage her to be part of them and ignore what you have told her as a parent.” - A father in Mayuge District “Some children don’t take our good advice because peer groups have influenced them so much negatively. So they tend to hear and do what their friends are advising them to do other than what the parents are advising them to do.” - A father in Butaleja District 39 | QUALITATIVE YOUTH-LED RESEARCH REPORT
These parents were not alone; others echoed this feeling. In fact, this was one of the most commonly mentioned challenges that parents spoke of. However, young people whom we spoke with describe the pressure of their peers in different terms—in terms of the pressure to fit in. A young woman in Butaleja District explained that “parents do their best during sexuality education, ...but young people end up being influenced by their peers to do the contrally [what the group is doing]”. Why is this? As a young man in the same district explained, “A child may be advised to do the right thing, but since he wants to fit in the group, he takes what his friend has told him and leaves out what his parents have advised him to do”. Another similarly explained that a young person might disregard what their parents have advised them to do “because he wants to fit in the peer group he is in”. In the face of this challenge, some parents expressed defeatist views. A father in Butaleja District explained that, of a child who copies the bad behavior of his or her peers, “such a kind, even if you waste your time advising him, he takes your advice [sic] as wrong ones, and he assumes that your talking to him is a harassment”. A mother also in Butaleja shared a similarly defeatist feeling towards those young people who fall into the wrong crowd, saying, “you can’t yield anything from that person, and the best way you can do as a parent [is] to give up on him so that you can remain peaceful in the family”. However, while these views may be valid, they are not productive because they could demotivate parents to discuss what are already difficult topics in the first place. Perhaps, instead, it would be more productive to look at the potential that peer influence represents, rather than trying to fight it and giving up. As parents identify, peer influence can be powerful, but it need not be negative. If peer perspective is so influential, how can it be redirected towards positive influence that helps parents to reinforce the messages they want to impart to those in their care?
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RECOMMENDATIONS AND CONCLUSION 1. The findings note that most parents do have negative perceptions about sexuality education which many see as a promotion of promiscuity. And so, there’s a need for parents to be sensitised on the importance of sexuality education. Improving sexuality education outcomes requires building broader awareness among communities on the importance of sexuality education in informing choices and shaping the lives of young people. 2. The findings show that parents and young people feel uncomfortable and shy holding conversations on sexuality education with young people expecially those of the opposite sex. And so, there is a need for parents and caretakers to create a safe space that encourages open communication with young people. This involves treating young people in their care with respect, building close relationships that promotes two-way communication between parents and young people. It has been stressed by young people that an authoritarian relationship where parents lay down rules rather than creating space for discussion does not only renders these conversations more difficult but also erodes their relationship overall. 3. The findings note that there’s a limited understanding of “children’s rights” and their enforcement, which are interpreted by both young people and parents to mean that children are “untouchable” and that parents do not have the right and influence to guide and involve their children in conversations on sexuality education. These needs to be clarified to ensure that parents and young people can clearly understand their roles and responsibilities in this very sensitive area. 4. Young people are influenced by their peers despite the efforts of parents and caretakers in delivering sexuality education, so there is a need for parents and caretakers to identify and leverage on the potential of peer influence and ensure that these are redirected into positive influence so that parents can reinforce the messages they want to pass on to those in their care. This requires that the young people and their peers are sensitised and provided with correct information regarding sexuality so that they can have a positive influence on their peers. 5. The complexity in local dialect words connected to sexuality. Many local dialects have different coded wording to refer to different sexuality issues and may be confusing. Direct mention of body parts in local dialects is challenging as both parents and young people feel shy and uncomfortable sharing and interacting with each other due to the perceived obscenity of the words. So, there’s a need to develop standard guidelines on sexuality education with appropriate vocabulary (in the local dialect), which are well packaged to suit the young people’s information needs that can guide parents while delivering sexuality education to young people. These should be incorporated into the current Uganda National Framework on Sexuality Education, to enable parents/caregivers and other Sexuality education providers. The universally accepted vocabulary will enable normalise conversation related to sexualioty education for young people.
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