Issue Fourteen: Autumn Transition

Radical Issue Fourteen, September/October 2019

Directory Monthly Affirmation D.I.Y. Therapy: Life Death Cycle Pump Boy by Wendy Rodriguez October Leaves by Jasmine Farrell You Are Magic by Nia Chrysalis Iris Orpi Fall by Inisa Fajra Excerpt from Stories to Forget by Erika Reyes NEW: Musical Intro: Faith Walker Flaws by Leah Oviedo Awesome Articles Artisans & Zines We Love List of Healing Resources

A New Affirmation for You!

I am grateful for change.

Transition allows me to grow, think, and experience the world in new ways.

I embrace the transitions in my life that are painful and awkward.

I am always evolving.

What is Radical zine?

I created Radical to spread a message of sustainable self-care and to promote independent artists, writers, and healers, especially woc and queer creatives.

Choosing to love myself unconditionally and heal is the reason I am still alive.

Art, poetry, & choosing to support others gives me a greater purpose than just my own needs. XOXO, Leah

Subscribe to Radical Zine for $1/month at Patreon.com/LOviedo Radical Zine is people powered & your support is appreciated!

D.I.Y. Therapy: The Life Death Cycle Transition in our healing journey can trigger a hard setback, especially in regards to grief. This might be a death, the end of a relationship, moving to a new place, finishing school, or something else. Once we teach ourselves to understand that our life is series of cycles, new beginnings and endings, it's easier to navigate through transition.

The Life/Death/Life or renewal theme is found often in the book “Women Who Run With the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype by Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Ph. D. This idea that we need to learn to be okay with loss, release, and death so we can grow stronger and wiser and so we can move from one stage to the next has been a large theme in my healing journey. For 17 years I was stuck in depression. I functioned, I grew older, but I didn't grow wiser. I couldn't let go of the trauma, violence, and grief that happened in my younger years. Instead of accepting those as lessons on my journey I tried to ignore the impact they had on me and my belief about life. Since then, I've learned that living in tune with the cycle of life gives me a greater connection to the earth and through that I connect easier with a deep wisdom that allows me to grow and flourish.

“To have the seed means to have the key to life. To be with the cycles of the seed means to dance with life, dance with death, dance into life again.

The wild woman nature of women is the Life and Death Mother in her most ancient form. Because she turns in these constant cycles, I call her the Life/Death/Life Mother.” Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Ph. D I'm lucky in a way because I was able to experience intense grief from multiple loved ones in a short period. Within four years I lost my parents, one of my closest friends, an older cousin, and a new friend. It was devastating! I felt like every time I was beginning to heal from one death that another presented itself. So, to say I'm lucky may sound weird, but it gave me great insight into the reality that we are all only here for a blip in history and we all must die. When I was younger and experienced violence and then grief over a friend's death by suicide, the joyful part of me died, and stayed dead for years to come. When I began to heal from my depression, I felt reborn in some way. I was no longer living this dark, ugly life with no light at the end. Instead I felt revived with a new joy for life.

Soon after starting that healing process, my parents died and with them a part of me died too. I no longer had the two people who created and raised me. After a long period of grief, I once again felt reborn. Whether you are transitioning through grief or any other experience, it can help to search inside those experiences for your new growth.

I have four questions that I offer you to journal and take action on. It is great to philosophize and dive deep into our wounds so we can heal, but it requires more than just journaling and talking about healing. We must take action or we won't be able to fully embrace our whole journey. Use your answers to make conscious changes in your inner and outer world.

1. What parts of my past are causing me pain or drama?

2. Why am I still holding on to those parts?

3. What would my life be like if my past self no longer controlled me?

4. How can I let forgive and release the pain into the past?

I hope this inspires you to release your traumas into your memory, forgive yourself and others, and be reborn into your next stage of life. This book has been a great resource and I highly recommend reading it on your healing journey.

Check out the Healing Journey podcast on Breaker.com.

“Pump Boy�

by Wendy Rodriguez

Wendy Rodriguez is an artist from the San Fernando Valley. Her work focuses on themes of love, friendship, and hope. Follow her on Instagram and read her recent interview on Voyage LA.

“October Leaves”

by Jasmine Farrell Autumn leaves.

Summertime is when happiness is conceived, in the crevices of quiet mornings and ludicrous nights.

Spring flowers.

May rain showers devour old flames while winter sparks back new ones.

Thank God for those Jasmine Farrell is a writer. She recently released her third poetry collection, Long Live Phoenixes that urges her readers to always soar high and embrace who they are.

In 2014, she released her first poetry collection, ‘My Quintessence,’ that includes poems from her teenage years and her past life as a Christian. After de-converting and re-discovering herself, she wrote her second poetry collection, ‘Phoenixes Groomed as Genesis Doves,’ (PGAGD). Her commitment to encourage others on similar paths, spills on the pages as Jasmine opens her heart and shares her personal experiences with the world.

JasmineFarrell.com & Facebook.com/justbreathejasmine & Twitter.com/justbreathejas & Instagram.com/JustBreatheJasmine

"You are Magic�

by Nia

Nia is a queer, black, self-taught visual artist living in Baltimore City. For over 25 years Nia has created both large and small-scale projects, from murals and sign making to creating greeting cards and painting pet portraits. Their artwork focuses on the different living beings that make up this planet, including flora and fauna. As a co-owner of Red Emma’s Bookstore and Coffee House and with the work they do with BRED, they hope to break the cycle of silenced emotions and create moments where feelings are present, raw, transformative and valid. Instagram.com/little.tree.art & Facebook.com/nia.draws.things

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Video Highlight:

Buddhist Nuns: Kung Fu Activists This nunnery has an empowering claim to fame—it’s the only one in Nepal where the nuns practice martial arts. The nuns of the Buddhist Drukpa Order train three hours a day, and they break bricks with their bare hands

Watch it on Youtube.com/watch?v=6QL0v5wLxKM&feature=youtu.be

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“Chrysalis ”

by Iris Orpi Not surrounded, but a part of me that I intimately know and cherish folding into a fist of which my flesh is part, not imprisoned.

A dense and opaque darkness of my own making, half destruction, half waiting.

Out of instinct I had not allowed a space for voices, only change.

Here, the past is weightless and the future can’t exist.

There’s a promise that it will emerge beautiful, but there are so many things that could go wrong outside in my absence.

Breaths come as pauses; the process grows impatient.

The process is me. I am the undulating, the weeping on the bridge between new and old, the temptation of ending versus fighting to occupy a place larger than this.

It requires so much pain.

Iris Orpi is a Filipina writer living in Chicago, IL. She is the author of the novel The Espresso Effect and two books of collected poetry, Cognac for the Soul and Beautiful Fever. She was an Honorable Mention for the annual Contemporary American Poetry Prize in 2014. Her work has appeared in over two dozen online and print publications around Asia, North America, Europe, and Africa. twitter.com/irisorpi

facebook.com/irisorpi

Collage art by Radical

“Fall”

by Inisa Fajra The way people lose themselves in love is the same way they lose themselves in sadness When the feelings are deep and touch us to our core we fall.

******

There are those feelings that guide us throughout the day and those that have come in to change us.

They aren’t always welcome, unless they hide behind the face of something we’ve been craving. Otherwise, we’d rather stay in summer – where the fields and trees are alive and green, the flowers are fragrant, the days are long, the weather friendly, the birds are loud and even the rain feels warm on the skin. Then temperatures begin to drop, so do the leaves, exposing naked trees that have lost their crowns, covering the floor in colours that will die and everything threatens of falling silent. Just winds, strong winds that don’t care about stagnation, habits, promises, and are coming to test our roots.

We have the same deep cravings for love and for sadness. We crave love because we want to let go, we crave sadness because we want to let go.

We want love to find us, inspire us, do with us what it must, just stay a while and we agree to change and be better, do better, through it.

We want sadness to heal us, to help us get rid of how we feel, to allow us to be still, even when all around us is falling apart, moving too fast, like tears rushing up and out to state their realness, then moving on, dissolving.

Love and sadness both allow us to let go, to allow change to happen; both we fear as they tell us that we’re no longer in control; both require us to fall, so that we can rest down there for a moment, tending to our roots, until it’s time for us to come back and grow – stronger, new.

Inisa Fajra is a creative writer and poet and wellness & empowerment leader (WEL-being) who works on empowering others by helping to understand and navigate our emotions better. Her words serve to make people feel and invite them to dig deep into their own pool of emotions in order to heal, inspire, awaken and empower. She's currently working on her first book of poetry and short stories. Follow Inisa at Instagram.com/inisa.fajra.poetry

“Excerpt from Stories to Forget”

by Erika Reyes I was driving up Benton Street and about to get on the 101 freeway. I don’t remember where I was going. We were on the phone.

How are you so sure that I’ll wait for your, you said with an exasperation that ran through the whole conversation.

I don’t think you’ll wait, I said. I think that if we’re meant to be together, then we’ll find a way to get back to each other and maybe then it will work.

It might take years though, I continued.

If we don’t try it now, then we’ll never do it, you responded.

Well, I can’t go back to what we had. There’s too much trauma and all you remind me of is the pain of the past no matter how much I love you. I said it and stared at each home’s front door as I drove pass the Silverlake neighborhood. I imagined each person walking through a front door they recognize each and every day. I thought about how different my life was at that moment. I yearned to be near you. To have a door and a home with you and, yet, I knew this was a distant yearning. So distant it existed in another universe, perhaps. I could hear you almost cry over the phone and I swallowed my own tears and said, you’ll probably end up marrying her, I know it. And it’s too bad because that makes it a sure thing that I will not be in your life. If anything, at least I would have liked to be part of your happiness and see you with someone you love and live a happy life. It pains me that it will never be; that I have to let go.

I remember the silence on your end before you responded. That might happen, you said. And you’ll probably get married with that girl as well.

The silence solidified the end. There was nothing else to say.

I love you so much, I said. Or maybe you said it first. I got on the freeway and we both ended the call. That was one of the last conversations between us. It wasn’t the last. I don’t know when the last conversation will be. I always think it’s the last and then the inevitable call happens. And I wonder, how long will we be in transition, if we’re not over it already.

Erika Reyes is a word-enthusiast based in Los Angeles, California.

Background is Mesoamerican, Mexican, and Angelin@. With Spanish and English writing, she focuses on short stories. But you can also get a copy of her plays, poetry, and prose, or zines about travel and erotica +++ if you directmessage or email. She also does freelance translations between English and Latin American Spanish. Please contact her for comments or questions at IG: Instagram.com/artificialaltar or email erikaisreyes@gmail.com

NEW PODCAST! Tips to build a daily Self-Love Diet practice—a practice of regularly offering yourself love. Mother-daughter duo Michelle and Emelina Minero will guide you in building a loving relationship with your spirit, body, thoughts, emotions, relationships, culture, and world.

Check out a their new episodes on Podomatic.com/podcasts/selflovediet

Musical Introduction: Faith Walker Faith Walker, has been writing and recording original music since the young age of fourteen. Born in LA and raised in Canada, coming from a multicultural background and musical family, has given Faith a unique perspective, which is reflected in her music. Faith has had a number of singles on commercial and college radio and has worked with several award winning musicians, including a collaboration with Maestro Fresh Wes, The God Father of Canadian Hiphop on “Ambition” off his 2018 Juno Nominated album “Coach Fresh”. Faith’s “Steppin Out” Remix featured Choclair and other collaborations include Classified, DJ Starting From Scratch, Infinite & Errol Blackwood of Messenjah.

Over the years Faith has opened for acts including Luciano, Mobb Deep, Serani, Kim Davis and Leroy Gibbons. Recently on the “Music and Medicine Tour” with Dr Dre’s son, Curtis Young.

Faith received PEABO awards in 2016 & 2017, in the category of Female Singer and was nominated for KW Oktoberfest Woman Of The Year in Arts and Culture in 2015 which recognized the work she has done in the community. Her EP Head In The Clouds gives a glimpse into her world, as she dealt with life’s struggles from surviving cancer to a toxic relationship. Faith shares her messages of resilience and never giving up on your dreams. It has become a new purpose to share her story and be involved in the community. She continues to perform and speak in support of non-profits and causes including Hopespring/Wellspring Cancer Support Centre, Young Adult Cancer Canada & Twist Out Cancer. Speaking at schools in the community, teaching the youth sharing the importance of Hope, standing up for what you believe in and the importance of creative expression. As she continues her monthly #Faithfulfridays Live series, Faith, introduces her audience to other talented artists, who perform with live band and are interviewed by her host, Nat. Faith’s upcoming, Self Titled album includes the Head In The Clouds Remix featuring Ray Robinson. This inspiring video dropped Summer of 2019, and tells Faith’s story of fighting Breast Cancer at 26 and again at 30. Friend’s and family members join Faith in this video sharing their true stories of fighting adversity, and finding a blessing in disguise. This is Faith’s proudest accomplishment as she aspires to inspire.

Listen to her on Apple Music or Amazon.

Follow her!

YouTube Instagram.com/faithwalkermusic Twitter.com/_faithwalker_

“Flaws”

by Leah Oviedo

(Image text: “Me encantan mis imperfecciones. I love my so called imperfections.”)

Leah Oviedo was raised roving around various states in a family mixed with Miscellaneous, Mexican, & German roots. This pushed her to have an intersectional interest in art, writing, and activism. After suffering from depression for 17 years, she was inspired to heal her trauma with art therapy and then with other methods. Her current focus is connecting with nature, smashing the patriarchy, and eradicating self-hate through self-care and radical ideas with the help of a diverse group of creators sharing their stories and their magic. Learn more at ImpowerYou.org.

Más Awesomeness!

Art & Life with Wendy Rodriguez!

Read her interview on Voyagela.com/interview/art-life-wendy-rodriguez ___________ "SANKOFA: Going back to fetch your inner voice" by Derise Tolliver Atta Watch it: Youtube.com/watch?v=FbiUDXnx9UY ___________ “Model, actress, activist, and swimsuit impresario Emily Ratajkowski wants to empower women everywhere to skip shaving their underarms if that’s what makes them feel sexy “ by Heather Schwedel Form your own opinion on if this is good or bad at Slate.com/humaninterest/2019/08/emily-ratajkowski-armpit-hair-photo-shoot-annoying.html ___________ One of our regular contributors Jasmine Farrell has a blog!

Read her latest post “O is for Obligation” Jasminefarrell.com/blog/o-is-forobligation

KEEP GOING!

Xingonas in the Pit's "Black and Brown Punk Fest TX" Event: https://www.facebook.com/events/487290295432117/

Stuff We Love:

Jewelry: Wisdom Wear by Grey J.

Each piece is one of a kind. After creation the piece is cleansed with sage.

You're an original, so wear your original. Follow on Instagram.

Muchacha Fanzine

Muchacha Fanzine Etsy Store: Etsy.com/shop/muchachashop Muchacha Fanzine Patreon: Patreon.com/muchachafanzine Submission guidelines for Muchacha Fanzine's "Liberation Youth" :https://www.patreon.com/posts/liberation-youth-27129604

Healing Resources Nationwide Suicide Prevention crisis line: 1-800-273-8255.

Don’t want to call? Use a text help line. Text 741741 anywhere in the USA for a live trained counselor.

The Trevor Project – Suicide prevention for LGBTQ youth, 1-866-488-7386 or TheTrevorHelpline.org There are apps that support mental health. The My3App connects someone who is feeling suicidal with their three main support contacts. My3app.org Mental Health America offers free mental health first aid training, Mentalhealthamerica.net NAMI – Alliance of mental illness has a program called Peer to Peer, similar to Big Brother/Big Sister, which is a way to socialize and give support for those who are feeling isolated. Nami.org DBSA– Depression, Bipolar, Anxiety. Dbsalliance.org Survivors of Suicide Loss. SOSLSD.org The Love Warrior Community focuses on helping people work on self-love and body acceptance. Lovewarriorcommunity.com

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If you like Self-Care, check out this FREE E-BOOK! By cultivating radical self-love, you are choosing to believe in the radical idea that you are whole and valuable as you are.

Loving your self is one of the bravest things you can do.

Featuring work by Michelle Minero, Kiyoshi Shelton, Jaz Gray, Corry Lang, Natalie Small, Rae Lawrence, Jason Freeman, Jasmine Farrell, Anaid Garcia, Donovan Cheney, Vidya, Katrina Mendoza and Leah Oviedo.

These amazing people are different genders, skin tones, sexual orientations, & abilities, and hold various beliefs. Yet they all share the belief that self-love is an important aspect of life. Choose your complimentary e-book format or PDF on Patreon.com/Loviedo.

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