Celebrating Fathers at QC

3 Recognizing Fathers 4 A Generational Gi

5 Maintaining Work-Life Balance

6 A Father on the Road

Recognizing the Fathers

Being a father is no simple task. Fathers have to be role models, teachers, protectors, and fixers for their children. It’s a job with no handbook and extremely high expectations.

For Fathers in the trucking industry, these responsibilities are compounded by long hours away from home, sometimes lasting for several days in a row. Driver dads put aside their desires to be at home in order to put food on the table and build a home for their loved ones. It’s a di icult trade-o made out of a self-sacrificial love for family.

To celebrate Father’s Day, we sat down with professional drivers Deepak Monsingh, Guy Mallory, Martin Hunter, Dan Bollinger, and Terrence Woods to ask them about what it means to be a father in the logistics industry.

A Generational Gi

There is no playbook on how to be a dad; it’s something that is learned by observing the role models in our lives, then passed down to the next generation. Fathers understand that their kids are watching at all times, and their job is to model what it means to be a good man both at home and at work.

“The kind of kid you produce depends on the kind of father you are. Every kid is born innocent. It’s your job as a parent to make your kids into healthy adults. It’s a huge responsibility.

-Deepak

Dan agreed, and emphasized the importance of setting the right example for his kids and others. He shared “My mother taught me how to treat people, and now I try to reflect that in my interactions with others. With my kids, with customers, with teammates, I try to be a positive influence. I just try to inspire my kids: put a good day’s work in, and treat others the way you want to be treated.”

The pressure of that responsibility is something that Terrence doesn’t take lightly. He shared “My son is my home. He’s my motivation. He loves trucks. He’s always asking ‘where’s the red truck at, daddy?’ I know he’s depending on me and I know I can’t let him down. I focus on my safety now more than ever because I know he’s depending on me.”

Every conversation revolved around the same central theme: kids are watching. They see you at your best and at your worst, even when you think they aren’t looking. It was a point that Martin was passionate about, “I want to teach my boy how to be a man. They see what you do and the way you handle situations. You can talk, you can say do this and do that, but we’re visual people. We learn by seeing, not just hearing.”

Most importantly, the dads emphasized the need to be a father at all times, no matter what happened while out on the road. Guy put it eloquently, “Make sure you’re the same man going out to work as you are when you’re walking through the door. If you’re smiling when you’re going, make sure you’re smiling when you’re coming home.”

A Father on the Road

All fathers face challenges, but dads on the road face unique obstacles that they need to overcome to both financially provide for their families and emotionally support their children. If they’re not on the road, they’re not making money to provide for their families. As much as they might want to be at home spending time with their children, their job will inevitably pull them away.

“It’s hard to not be there physically every day.” Martin explained “That’s what I struggle with. Being home, making ends meet, wanting to do more, while also balancing my family’s future, but that’s life! There’s no perfect job.”

Fortunately, Martin has developed tactics to stay connected at home while on the road, and emphasized the importance of communication “There’s so many ways to communicate. I talk to them on the phone. Let them know I’m still here. When my son was growing up, I would talk to him every day.”

Guy took it a step further, and explained “My kids and I made a pact a long time ago: no matter what, you can ask me and you can talk to me. Don’t worry about what comes a er that, just don’t be afraid to tell me. It’s easier for you to tell me than it is for me to come to ask you. Dads don’t always know what their kids are going through, so your kids have to be willing to talk to you. It helps that relationship.” It’s a deal that worked, and Guy revealed “To this day, my daughter works at 8:00, so she calls me at 7:30 just to talk to me. My son can call me at any time about anything.”

As technology has progressed, it’s been easier to maintain relationships with kids at home, as Deepak reflected “It’s a lot di erent now compared to 30-40 years ago. We’re much more fortunate compared to pre-cell phone drivers. We call, talk, text, video chat, and email, so when he says he’s somewhere and I’m not sure, I can ask him to turn the camera on! Technology is very useful. It’s a lot easier. It’s easier to be close to family and I use it to mess with my pets.”

Terrence focused on the importance of making every moment matter. “My son and I Facetime a lot when I’m on my break. I call him, do homework with him, and he’s telling me about the new Super Mario that I need to buy him. He’s always asking when I’m coming home.” He continued “When I’ve been gone, he runs to me with that joy in his eyes and screams ‘Daddy!’ He’s always ready to play. He’s so excited.”

Driving dads understand the importance of scheduling both on the road and o the clock. Dan explained “I work 12 to 14 hour days, and an hour drive back and forth, so I always work my schedule around what I have to do. I start my days early so I can do things like my kids’ concerts and baseball games. I set my vacation around my kids’ schedules.”

Later, Dan continued “My wife and I do a lot of divide and conquer. If I’m out, she’s in. There’s very few times that we missed the games, because I work my schedule around my kids. Even if I showed up late to birthdays and holidays, I always made my appearances. I want to get home, sleep in my bed, eat with my kids, and be at the practices with my family. That’s the way you have to look at it. What’s important to you? Job security is important, but family always comes first. “

Terrence also stressed the importance of having a game plan for home time. “If I’m home for four days, I want everything planned out. Pool time, Chuck-E-Cheese, movies, you have to make the most of it. Kids are always ready to play, so even if I’m tired, I make time for him. I try to wear him out, but he always wears me out instead.“

It’s a juggling act and a constant sacrifice, but a driving dad wouldn’t have it any other way. They find a way to make it work, no matter what it takes.

For the New Fathers

No matter how hard you try, nothing can truly prepare you for being a father. It’s mostly a skill that’s learned by doing. But we would be remiss if we didn’t ask our driving dads to provide their best advice for new fathers trying to figure out a game plan.

Dan’s instructions were simple, yet daunting: “Lead by example. The kids will follow. They see if you get up for work. How you handle your emotions. How you treat your wife. You gotta roll with the punches. You’re a father, and you’ll always be that first. You gotta give your kids direction. There’s lines on the highway for a reason, if the kids get out of line, you gotta correct them to help them avoid an accident. Life is full of potholes, how do you deal with it? Things are going to be hard, but your kids will see how you handle it.”

Guy emphasized the integrity of your words as a father, sharing “Mean what you say, and say what you mean. If you say you’re going to be there, it doesn’t matter if it costs you, be there. Kids remember that stu . It can be a 3rd grade graduation that you didn’t think they would remember and you were supposed to work, but you said you were going to be there, so you better find a way to be there.”

You’re not going to have it all figured out on day one, but parenting can be very rewarding, as Deepak explained “It’s a learning experience! If you do it right, it’s the best experience you can have. You get to see them blossom. They make you proud. I love it when people meet my son and see how great he is. When they comment on it, that’s all I need. That’s the best reward you can get.”

Martin reflected on the importance of allowing kids to grow into the people they want to be, and shared “Whether you as a parent see the potential or not, we don’t know what’s going to be the thing that clicks for kids. You need to let them find their outlet, what motivates them, what makes them focus. Sports, clubs, music, you just don’t know what it’s going to be!“ He continued “Have no regrets. Whatever you want to try and do, do it! You don’t want to live to have regrets. Don’t listen to anyone else telling you you can’t do something.”

Terrence summarized it best when he shared “Enjoy every moment with your kids. Make more memories with them. Kids are priceless, they’re a blessing. Handle that joy and excitement responsibly. Kids give you energy, and are something to look forward to.”

To all the fathers out there, thank you for everything you’re doing to raise the next generation. Your guidance is something we celebrate today and every day.