QNotes Oct. 13-26, 2012

Oct. 13-26 . 2012

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Oct. 13-26 . 2012

inside

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Oct. 13-26, 2012 Vol 27 No 12

arts. entertainment. news. views.

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contributors this issue

Paige Braddock, Rosendo Brown, The Charlotte Observer Editorial Board, Matt Comer, Jessica Dunlap, Jon Hoppel, Charlene Lichtenstein, Lainey Millen, David Stout, Trinity

front page Graphic Design by: Lainey Millen

news & features

6 News Notes: Regional Briefs 8 City manager to retire 10 Tough questions on DP benefits

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a&e / life&style

11 Playing the field 12 Women’s healthcare 13 Having a mammogram 15 ‘Obamacare’ and me 16 Tell Trinity 17 Out in the Stars 18 On the map 19 20 Questions 22 Community resources 22 Fabulance 22 Jane’s World 23 Q events calendar

opinions & views

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Guest Commentary QPoll Charlotte Checklist Editor’s Note

Material in qnotes is copyrighted by Pride Publishing & Typesetting © 2012 and may not be reproduced in any manner without written consent of the editor or publisher. Advertisers assume full responsibility — and therefore, all liability — for securing reprint permission for copyrighted text, photographs and illustrations or trademarks published in their ads.

The sexual orientation of advertisers, photographers, writers, cartoonists we publish is neither inferred nor implied. The appearance of names or photographs does not indicate the subject’s sexual orientation. qnotes nor its publisher assumes liability for typographical error or omission, beyond offering to run a correction. Official editorial positions are expressed in staff editorials and editorial notations and are determined by editorial staff. The opinions of contributing writers and guest columnists do not necessarily represent the opinions of qnotes or its staff. qnotes accepts unsolicited editorial, but cannot take responsibility for its return. Editor reserves the right to accept and reject material as well as edit for clarity, brevity.

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11 Editor: Matt Comer x202 editor@goqnotes.com Assoc. Ed.: David Stout editor2@goqnotes.com Production: Lainey Millen x205 production@goqnotes.com Printed on recycled paper.

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Oct. 13-26 . 2012

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guest commentary

by Jessica Dunlap, York, S.C. :: Guest Contributor

Why I am abandoning the GOP I am an out and proud Christian. I am a fiscal conservative. I am also a lesbian, so let me just say how psychologically damaging it is to be told by complete strangers that what you do in the privacy of your own home is unnatural, you’re sick in the head, that the right man hasn’t given it to you the right way, that you’re going to hell, that you need to be fixed, that you’re probably a pedophile, that you are destroying the institution of marriage or that you are bringing the wrath of God upon your country. This is what the Republican Party does and these are the ideas it supports.

The collective hate from nearly half of this country, championed by the GOP is psychologically damaging. It causes people to kill themselves, it legitimizes violence, it is immoral and it is sick. The GOP is in its death throes. They have strayed so far from conservative, small government, individual rights and their other core values that the party needs to go ahead and die so that it can rise like a phoenix from the ashes and move in the right (no pun intended) direction.

My fiancée and I feel very alone.

Who will fight for us? We are expected to tip-toe around society, not offend anyone’s delicate sensibilities by talking about each other or discussing our future plans. We are constantly dehumanized and I absolutely will not vote for politicians who propagate hate and, as a result, indirectly endanger my life.

I do not agree with a lot of Obama’s policies, but I wept when he said he supported gay marriage. Mitt Romney’s flip-flop to the anti-gay right was a political move in the wrong direction. Not only will he lose this election, but he will go down in history as a bigot. The Democratic Party officially supports gay marriage. I will be voting for my rights this election. I will be voting for my humanity. If I’m taxed 75 percent that’s okay with me, though such a thing really won’t happen. What will happen is the world will be a place where I can worry less about being killed, where I will think less about killing myself, and where I can be myself. : :

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qnotes

As of this issue’s street date, it’s been 1,041 days since Anthony Foxx became Charlotte’s first Democratic mayor in 22 years, taking the reins of a city council with a decidedly Democratic and pro-LGBT super-majority. Yet, in the time since, only a handful of important issues have been addressed by the Charlotte City Council. At the county level, as well, important concerns of the local LGBT community continue to languish. Each issue qnotes will print our “Charlotte Checklist,” a round-up of the LGBT equality initiatives either accomplished or left on the back burner by local elected officials. A checkmark means the item has been accomplished. An exmark indicates those items yet to be accomplished.

Non-discrimination

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City council-approved non-discrimination ordinance prohibiting discrimination against city employees on the basis of sexual orientation and gender-identity.

Note: Charlotte City Manager Curt Walton approved the addition of sexual orientation to his human resources policy in March 2010, but has yet to add gender identity.

Mecklenburg County Board of Commissioners-approved equal employment opportunity policy prohibiting discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity.

Note: Commissioners approved the addition of sexual orientation to the policy on May 17, 2005. Gender identity has never been included.

Amendments to the existing Charlotte Commercial Non-Discrimination Ordinance prohibiting businesses contracting with the city from discriminating on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity.

Domestic partner benefits

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Domestic partner benefits available for same-sex partners of city employees.

Note: Charlotte City Council included a domestic partner plan in a budget passed on June 25, 2012.

Domestic partner benefits available for same-sex partners of county employees.

Note: Mecklenburg County Commissioners approved offering domestic partner benefits on Dec. 15, 2009.

Community

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Establishment of an LGBT liaison officer(s) within Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department.

Establishment of a city and/or county taskforce for LGBT citizens, residents, business owners and youth.

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Charlotte Checklist

Oct. 13-26 . 2012

City or county sponsorships, grants or other financial or non-monetary support of LGBT programs, projects, services or community organizations.

Speak out You can learn more about contacting your elected representatives on the Charlotte City Council and the Mecklenburg Board of County Commissioners by visiting goqnotes.com/takeaction/. : :

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editor’s note

by Matt Comer matt@goqnotes.com

United for the cause Each October, everyone and everything goes pink. So, too, has qnotes. And, that’s just the way it should be. Our cover this issue serves as a loving tribute to those affected by breast cancer as our publication pauses to recognize National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Our health features this issue, in print and online, delve into the issues of wellness and breast cancer awareness.

It’s an especially important topic within the LGBT community, where lesbian women are at a higher risk for developing the disease. They are among the hundreds of thousands of women each year diagnosed with breast cancer. It’s a hard-fought battle for women, who often depend on the support and love of those around them. Families, friends and communities can, indeed, make a difference. Once a year, we’re reminded just how important that support is.

The support of gay and bisexual men of our lesbian and bisexual sisters is crucially needed. In the height of the 1980s AIDS Crisis, lesbian women stood up and spoke out on our behalf. It is only fitting that we return that selfless conviction when others need our help the most. Though very few men will ever be diagnosed with breast cancer, it is a disease that still impacts us. Our mothers, sisters, co-workers, neighbors and friends are among those most at-risk. As they fight, we find ourselves drawn to their cause.

We are ready, willing and able to stand up, educate and fundraise, knowing that together we can beat the disease.

Fortunately, no one in my family has ever been diagnosed with breast cancer. But, as a son of a loving mother, a brother to a beautiful little sister and a nephew of many aunts, I’m keenly aware that my family might one day be faced with heart-breaking news. One day, my own family might have to face daunting times and challenges. That’s why I stand up now and offer the support I can. If the unthinkable should ever visit my family, I hope others will be there with their support also.

Patient no longer On the opposing page, qnotes once again prints our “Charlotte Checklist.” It was an idea prompted by my editorial two issues ago (“With DNC over, Charlotte must live up to progressive hype,” Sept. 15, goqnotes. com/17705/). In the editorial, I outlined the various issues yet to be addressed by local elected leaders in Charlotte and Mecklenburg County after the historic Democratic National Convention was hosted here. The checklist, which we’ll print in nearly every issue going forward, is a chance for our community to be

reminded just where their elected officials, collectively, stand on our issues. It is also a chance to hold our elected bodies accountable to us, our concerns and our needs.

I have always said just how shameful I think it is that North Carolina’s largest city — indeed, the largest city between Atlanta and Washington, D.C. — should lag so far behind on matters of LGBT equality. Though we have “friendly” elected officials, their friendship never really seems to extend much past election season. Our Charlotte Checklist is proof, showing how inadequate protections are for LGBT workers and community members.

On Oct. 17, the Mecklenburg LGBT Political Action Committee (MeckPAC) will host their annual candidates’ reception (see event details in our calendar on page 23). This year, candidates for the Mecklenburg Board of County Commissioners will be among those mixing and mingling with LGBT voters, citizens and residents at the event. I encourage you to attend, to make your presence known, to voice your concerns and demand action on these important matters.

Elected incumbents and hopeful candidates need to know that our community will no longer stand silently by as they ignore the issues important for our equality and our survival. As elected leaders, they should actually get to leading. But, we’ve seen very little of that. The time is now: no more backroom deals and no more hushed policy changes. We need more than smiles and nicely-worded form letters with the words “gay” or “LGBT” dropped in.

All those things are nice, but real political courage and leadership is better, and it is time that our community of voters, citizens and residents are recognized and protected as equally as others. It is time that city council and the county board put our issues on their public agendas and use the privileges we have given them — the power of their representative vote — to move our community forward.

We’ve been patient for far too long on these simple matters of inclusion. Why must Charlotte continue to languish when other cities and towns, some of them hundreds of times smaller than us, are seeing progress at much faster rates? Our community has long advocated for these changes, yet our elected leaders refuse to budge.

The more our leaders drag their feet, the more they will be seen as backward and bumbling southern politicians unwilling, either because of irrational fear or willfully-chosen bigotry, to protect all of their constituents.

I know a great many of these leaders and I know their hearts are in the right place. I hope their courage will prevail over their fear.

It would be a shame to see so many good reputations ruined because so many refused to do what is right. : :

Oct. 13-26 . 2012

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news notes: carolinas. nation. world. compiled by Lainey Millen | David Stout | Matt Comer

Charlotte Chorus sets spooky dance

CHARLOTTE — One Voice Chorus will host its HalloQween dance on Oct. 26, 8 p.m.-midnight at Extravaganza Depot, 1610 N. Tryon St. This first annual “ghoulish” dance party and scream factory fundraiser includes DJ Peter Presta, dancing, haunted warehouse full of uniquely spooky creatures, fortune tellers and a costume contest.

Tickets are $35 advance/$40 at the door.

Attendees receive two complimentary drinks.

A cash bar will be onsite.

For more information, visit onevoicechorus.com.

— L.M.

Comedians gather to assist HRC

CHARLOTTE — “Queer Queens of Qomedy,” a benefit for the Human Rights Campaign, will be held on Oct. 27, 8 p.m., at the Great Aunt Stella Center, 926 Elizabeth Ave. Doors open at 6:45 p.m.

On hand will be Poppy Champlin, Karen Williams and Zach Tocynski.

Admission is $25 general/$40 VIP. VIP comes with preferred seating and a meet and greet with the cast.

Annual membership to the Human Rights Campaign is included in the admission price.

The event is sponsored by Drake Dentistry.

To purchase tickets, visit action.hrc.org/ site/Calendar?view=Detail&id=110301& autologin=true.

— L.M.

Triad ENC gala planned

GREENSBORO — Equality NC Foundation has announced that it’s sixth annual Equality Conference & Gala will be held on Nov. 17.

The daytime portion will be held at Elliott University Center at the University of North Carolina at Greensboro. It brings LGBT North Carolinians and allies together for a day full of cutting-edge policy discussions and activist skills training.

The evening gala, which celebrates the collective achievements over the past year, will be held at the Empire Room, 203 S. Elm St. It is a fundraiser at which leadership awards are given to a legislative champion, along with equality champions in each of five regions across the state. They expect over 400 to attend each of its events who convene to fight for equality.

Keynote speaker will be the Rev. Dr. William J. Barber, II, president of the North Carolina State Conference of the NAACP Sponsors and gala table captains are being sought. For those interested, email Kay Flaminio at kay@equalitync.org.

To register or for more information, visit equalitync.org/conference.

— L.M.

Triangle Stossel visits Carolina

CHAPEL HILL — John Stossel, a news correspondent and personality from FOX Business News, was at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, Great Hall of the Student Union, on Sept. 21 where he taped his “Stossel” show segment, “Stossel Goes to College.” It aired on Sept. 27.

Stossel invited Equality North Carolina Executive Director Stuart Campbell and antigay hate group lobbyist and North Carolina Values Coalition’s Tami Fitzgerald to discuss the recently-approved anti-LGBT state constitutional amendment. The discussion was largely civil, though Fitzgerald and Campbell did engage in a few terse moments.

Campbell shared that there were over 1,100 benefits that are bestowed on married couples.

Stossel quipped that “maybe we should get rid of some of them.” Fitzgerald said that her group was not against gays, but that it supported the definition of marriage as between one man and one woman. She also said that the “parade of horribles” (issues that could hamper the LGBT community) has not happened since the passage of the anti-gay Amendment One in May 2012. Debate ensued regarding children, marriage and more.

Soldier’s remains returned RALEIGH — Lesbian Staff Sgt. Donna R. Johnson, 29, from Raeford and a member of the N.C. National Guard’s 514th Military Police Co., 60th Troop Command, based out of a Greenville suburb, Winterville, was among 14 people killed on Oct. 1 when a Taliban suicide bomber on a motorcycle drove into a joint U.S.-Afghan patrol in Khost, Afghanistan, about 100 miles southeast of Kabul near the Pakistan border and detonated a vest packed with explosives, The Charlotte Observer reported. The mission was part of Operation Enduring Freedom.

The Department of Defense made the announcement.

On her second deployment, she was deployed in August on a mission to train Afghan security forces in Photo Credit: The Charlotte Observer conjunction with international troops, the Observer said. via North Carolina National Guard The Observer added, “Johnson was a former state prison guard and a military police officer and had worked in bomb training at Fort Bragg. Her family said in a statement they want to remember Johnson ‘as a mission focused professional who gave her life serving her country and performing a job that she loved and excelled at.’ She ‘was a reserved and private person who had a close group of friends’ and four dogs. She is survived by her spouse, Tracy Dice.

Johnson was identified as a lesbian on Facebook’s The American Military Partner Association page in a memorial posting.

Her body was returned on Oct. 2 to Dover Air Force Base. At press time, funeral arrangements were incomplete.

— L.M. To see a video outtake and snippets of the conversation, visit goqnotes.com/17993.

— M.C & L.M.

South Carolina Palmetto State sets festival

COLUMBIA — South Carolina Pride will be held on Oct. 20 with a parade at noon and the festival beginning at 1 p.m.

The parade will start on Laurel St., between Assembly and Sumter Sts. and will progress down Main and Sumter Sts. toward the South Carolina. State House. The festival will be held along Main St. between Hampton and Gervais Sts. The Main Event, will feature vocalist Sheena Easton, celebrity impersonator Chad Michaels, recording artist Reina, along with an array of drag queens and kings, as well as long-time human rights activist and community organizer Tony Snell.

Let the Music Play, an after party, will be held at Chelsea’s Upstairs, 1734 Main St., from 9 p.m.-2 a.m. It will feature the talents of dance music artist Shannon. DJ Treavor and

DJ Joseph will spin. Cover charge is $15 at the door.

Festival goers can have access to the VIP and Ultra VIP lounges. The Ultra VIP is an enclosed building right at the main stage. Ticket holders are entitled to free liquor sponsored

by Ketel One, free catered food by Scott Hall Catering, VIP parking, meet and greet with main stage performers and more. Regular VIP activities are also included. Cost is $100 and is limited to 150 people.

A VIP tent with Barefoot Wine and Miller beer, plus water and sodas is just across the street from the Ulta VIP Lounge. If time permits, meet and greet with performers is also part of the package. Cost is $35 advance/$40 at the festival.

Mr. Pride, Addictive, and Miss SC Pride, Martina Diamante, will be on hand to welcome guests throughout the festival and parade. They were selected at a pageant held on Sept. 29 at the CMFA Event Hall.

Other events during the week are: Oct. 14, opening ceremony, followed by a volunteer

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goqnotes.com/to/news lunch and orientation; Oct. 15, Bowling with Pride; Oct. 16, “Pie in the Sky: The Brigid Berlin Story;” screening and discussion on film about fag hags by Ed Madden, University of South Carolina professor; Oct. 17, Road to The Main Event welcome reception; Oct. 18, “Keep the Lights On;” Oct. 19, Pride in the City; Oct. 19, official pre-party; and Oct. 21, SC Pride.

For more information, visit scpride.org.

— L.M.

National/Global ‘Ex-gay’ quackery outlawed

SACRAMENTO, Calif. — A groundbreaking new state law will protect LGBT youth from psychological abuse by deceitful mental health professionals who falsely claim to be able to change their sexual orientation or gender expression.

California is the first state in the nation to protect LGBT young people from so-called “ex-gay” therapies, which include the use of shame, verbal abuse and aversion therapy, that place youth at high risk for depression and suicide.

The law, signed by Gov. Jerry Brown (pictured), prohibits state-licensed therapists from engaging in these harmful practices with minors. It

goes into effect Jan. 1, 2013, but a legal challenge to the law is being mounted by anti-gay groups and churches who claim it violates free speech rights and the free exercise of religion.

— D.S.

NOM must reveal donors

WASHINGTON, D.C. — On Oct. 1, the U.S. Supreme Court rebuffed the National Organization for Marriage (NOM) in its attempt to circumvent the longstanding campaign reporting requirements by the State of Maine. By refusing to hear NOM’s appeal of an earlier federal court decision which held that the secretive anti-marriage equality group must make its donor list public, the Supreme Court has affirmed the critical importance of transparency in campaign disclosure laws. At press time, NOM had not complied with the federal court order or indicated its intention to do so.

— D.S.

Fund aids undocumented youth

SAN FRANCISCO, Calif. — Young LGBT undocumented immigrants struggling to pay application fees for President Obama’s new “Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals” (DACA) program can now receive financial help. The LGBT Dreamers Fund — made possible by more than $75,000 in contributions from an array of LGBT organizations and some individuals — will cover the DACA application fees of nearly $470. The amount can be daunting for youth who are ineligible to work under

current law. The National Center for Lesbian Rights and the L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center rallied other LGBT organizations across the country to contribute to the LGBT Dreamers Fund. Assistance is available on a first-come, first-served basis for qualified candidates.

Apply at LibertyHill.org/LGBTDreamersFund.

— D.S.

Site for trans college students

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The National Center for Transgender Equality has launched the Transgender On-campus Nondiscrimination Information (TONI) Project, the nation’s first online hub for current and prospective students in search of transaffirmative colleges and universities. The site allows trans students to share trans-affirmative college policies and practices, as well as exchange ideas for organizing and action.

Key features of the site include a searchable database of campus profiles documenting a range of school policies including housing, records and documentation, healthcare, safety and curricula. TONI Project users also have access to a community forum where they can share ideas for taking action. Learn more about the TONI Project and sign up for a webinar at transstudents.org/how-use-site.

— D.S

Schools expand online access

NEW YORK, N.Y. — The ACLU says public schools across the country responded very positively to its “Don’t Filter Me” campaign

to address discriminatory censorship of web content in public schools. The group found that most schools did not realize that, in addition to blocking all sexually explicit websites regardless of sexual orientation, their filtering software also contained a feature to block LGBT-related websites that are not sexually explicit, such as anti-bullying resources. On the other hand, the software allowed access to anti-gay websites. After being contacted, most schools reconfigured the software so students could access LGBT-related websites on a viewpoint-neutral basis. However, the ACLU was forced to sue one district in Camdenton, Mo., over the issue.

— D.S.

Deserving scout denied honor

SAN FRANCISCO, Calif. — After completing all of his requirements to become an Eagle Scout, Ryan Andresen was told that he will be refused the Boy Scout’s highest rank because he recently came out as gay to counter an incident of bullying within his troop. At press time, more than 75,000 had signed a petition at Change.org requesting that Andresen’s Troop leader reverse his shameful decision and bestow the honor. Andresen, who endured bullying as a teen from fellow Scouts in his troop, came out in a letter to his peers prompted by a bullying incident against another member of the troop. In his letter, Ryan talked about the effects that bullying had on him, including depression and self-harm.

— D.S

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City manager to retire Curt Walton called ‘great ally’ by LGBT activists

by Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.com

Police Chief Rodney Monroe talks with City Manager Curt Walton.

Photo Credit: Todd Sumlin Charlotte Observer.

CHARLOTTE — City Manager Curt Walton announced on Sept. 28 that he will retire, stepping down from his position in December. Walton has worked as city manager since June 2007 and was instrumental in offering new non-discrimination protections for lesbian and gay city workers.

In March 2010, Walton moved forward

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with changes to the city’s human resources and personnel policies to include sexual orientation in the city’s non-discrimination protections. The move by Walton marked the first time city workers had been protected against discrimination based on sexual orientation. Walton was also an avid supporter of the recently-adopted domestic partner benefits plan for same-sex partners of city employees.

Activists in Charlotte were quick to praise Walton’s record. Scott Bishop, chair of the Mecklenburg LGBT Political Action Committee (MeckPAC) told qnotes via email that Walton “has been a great ally” to Charlotte’s LGBT community. Walton, he said, worked “closely with Mecklenburg LGBT Political Action Committee … in implementing domestic partner benefits for Charlotte city employees in 2012 and adding sexual orientation to the employment non-discrimination policy of the City of Charlotte in 2010. ” Bishop added, “We wish him well in his retirement.”

Despite Walton’s progressive moves, the Charlotte City Council has consistently refused to publicly consider LGBT-inclusion efforts. As a result, transgender workers remain without employment protections and several other topics remain unaddressed.

Walton has worked for the City of Charlotte for 27 years. Previously, he worked as an assistant town manager for Wake Forest, N.C., in addition to serving on the staff of the North Carolina House of Representatives. He began his career as an intern at the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Utilities Department.

In addition to Walton’s work for the city, he has also served on the boards of Charlotte Center City Partners, the Queens University of Charlotte Board of Visitors, the Levine Museum of the New South, the Champions for Education (Wells Fargo Golf Championship) and the Community Catalyst Fund. He is also a board member for the United Way of the Central Carolinas.

Mayor Anthony Foxx and the city council will begin a job search for Walton’s replacement in October. : :

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A question on gays that’s difficult to ask Mecklenburg uncertain whether benefit violates Amendment One

by The Charlotte Observer Editorial Board

Mecklenburg commissioner Bill James wants to know if the county is violating North Carolina law by offering domestic partner benefits to employees in same-sex relationships. The answer to that question might result in those benefits being lost, which might explain why James seems to be one of few county officials who wants to know.

He is right to ask, however — whatever his motivation might be. James, who has railed against homosexuality regularly as a commissioner, questioned the county’s same-sex benefits policy in May, soon after North Carolina voters passed Amendment One, which made marriage between a man and a woman the “only domestic legal union.”

In August, county manager Harry Jones directed deputy county attorney Tyrone Wade to gather information on the constitutional amendment’s implications.

Wade made his report to commissioners in a closed session during the first week in October, James and commissioners chair Harold Cogdell told the editorial board.

Wade said there were “no good answers” regarding the legality of same sex benefits.

Commissioners, he said, had three options: change the policy, which has been in effect since 2009, rescind the policy or do nothing.

James wondered if there might be a fourth option: Ask County Attorney Marvin Bethune for his full legal opinion.

Commissioners can do so by putting such a request on the board meeting agenda, which takes three votes, then approving it.

Cogdell, as county chair, can put the item on the agenda by himself, and Bethune also can offer his opinion at the request of County Manager Harry Jones.

Bethune told the editorial board on Oct. 4 that he hasn’t been asked for his legal opinion

by Jones or the board, which hasn’t put the question on the agenda of the next board meeting. Cogdell said he won’t do it himself for what he calls a “political” matter.

We don’t doubt that James may be pushing the issue more because of his views on homosexuality than his desire to follow the letter of the law. But regardless of whether leaders like or dislike Amendment One, it’s the law, and cities and counties have an obligation to determine if their policies are in compliance.

That’s what Charlotte City Attorney Bob Hagemann has done. Earlier this year, Hagemann smartly requested a legal opinion on same-sex benefits from the N.C. attorney general’s office before the city begins offering those benefits next January. Noelle Talley, a spokeswoman for the attorney general, told the editorial board that lawyers are still working on an answer.

Experts are split on the legality of the benefits, but agree that the courts will likely decide. We’re sure of this: It would be an injustice for gays to lose benefits because their union doesn’t fit someone else’s definition of marriage. We, along with Amendment One’s many opponents, warned that this kind of governmental discrimination might be a byproduct of passing the amendment.

Cogdell said the board might revisit the topic if the attorney general’s office tells Charlotte its benefits policy is illegal. Bethune guesses the issue will land on his desk eventually. There’s no reason for that not to happen now. Officials can avoid potential lawsuits by protecting the county with knowledge, even if it’s something they don’t want to know. : : — Originally published by The Charlotte Observer on Oct. 5, 2012. Reprinted via the Charlotte News Alliance.

More on Amendment One Keep up with the latest news on Amendment One, its ramifications and the continuing debate, along with other state legislative news, at goqnotes.com/in/ncga/.

Monthly Social/Dinner Combined NoDa’s Microbreweries – Tour and Taste!

Wednesday, October 24, Tour starts at 5:30 p.m.

Tour one brewery, or tour them all!

Visit www.charlottebusinessguild.org for brewery tour/dinner schedule.

Save the Date! Business Guild 20th Anniversary Celebration!

Saturday, December 1 Dinner/Dancing/Entertainment CBG Community Service Awards Presentation Visit www.charlottebusinessguild.org for more information.

Email businessguild@yahoo.com for reservations.

www.charlottebusinessguild.org

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life

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SPORTS

Playing the field

Match-ups from across the Carolinas: Ruggers enjoy clinic, softball season begins

by Jon Hoppel :: qnotes contributor

Fall is here! With it brings the start of several sports seasons. So, if you’re looking for something to fulfill your sports needs with something other than the NFL, NCAA football or the MLB playoffs, you’ve come to the right place!

Rugby The Charlotte Royals rugby football team started off their season on Sept.

15 with an open rugby clinic hosted by World Barbarians coach Gus Ventura.

This event brought brought out over 40 ruggers from five states to participate in drills and fundamentals of the sport. The afternoon culminated with a rugby match between the Royals and the Charleston (SC) Blockade, a brand new team started by ex-Royal Frankie Brown.

The Royals got out to an early lead with a try by fly-half Danny Wadsworth, who ran it in from the 15 meter line. They were able to keep a 10-point advantage throughout with solid tackling and taking advantage of several miscues from the newly formed Blockade. The final score ended at 30-15 with the Royals taking the

an experienced opponent for many new players on the Charlotte roster. It also was the last match for past president and captain for the Royals, Thomas Southerland, as he takes his talents up to Chicago. He did not disappoint in his final appearance for the Royals, scoring two tries and making several huge tackles at the inside center position, giving Charlotte a 15-5 lead at Charlotte Royals’ Arthur Milne, left, and Zack Anderson, right, in match play halftime. The Grizzlies against Nashville Grizzlies’ Brad Janke. surged after the half, victory. Earning Man of the Match honors scoring quickly, cutting was forward, Jeff Enochs, who made a their deficit to five points. But, Charlotte triumphant return to the team after taking a regrouped and answered with their own try, year off. maintaining a 10-point lead until the end, Next up for the Royals was the annual winning 25-15. Also scoring for the Royals match-up with the Nashville Grizzlies on were fly-half Danny Wadsworth and the New Sept. 29. The first away game of the season Zealand sensation and flanker, Arthur Milne. for the Royals provided a strong test against Earning Men of the Match honors were

J.T. Wentz for the forwards and Thomas Southerland for the backs.

Softball The Carolina Softball Association started their season on Oct. 7. All games are played at Veterans Park, 2139 Central Ave., between 2-5 p.m. For those interested in joining the league, visit carolinasoftball.org, as players are still allowed to join a team within the first two weeks of play.

The K-Town Softball league in Knoxville, Tenn., will be hosting their annual K-Town Klassic tournament from Oct. 14-15. Teams from across the southeast, including Alabama, Tennessee, North Carolina, Georgia and Kentucky, will be competing in C and D divisions of coed softball and two women-only divisions, competitive and recreational. Charlotte’s own Carolina Showtime team is the defending champion in the D division, while the Cincinnati’s Shooters team is the defending C division winner. The next “Playing the Field” will have a full breakdown of this tournament, as well as Raleigh’s Triangle Tennis Club’s October tournament, along with the complete analysis of the next Royals match versus the Atlanta Bucks. : :

Oct. 13-26 . 2012

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life

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Stirrups aren’t just for cowpokes Well-woman visits are essential for good health

by Lainey Millen :: lainey@goqnotes.com

One of the most important practices a is placed on a specialized substrate which woman can engage in is a trip to the gynegives immediate reading results. I know that cologist. Oh, this isn’t because you love it so my doctor also asks for a urine specimen much. Nor, is it because you enjoy the visit. to establish red/white blood cell variety or You may like your doctor. And, you may even number, to see if there is bacteria, etc., in get a bonus gift of specialized products just the urine, to check to see if glucose or other for women when you leave. You can leave substances are there, to determine what your chaps at home, however. You won’t need the pH acid or alkaline shows, as well as them when you get positioned on the table in the urine concentration. Once everything is the stirrups. said and done (and, this should also include Oddly, sometimes when you are being a breast exam as well), you get dressed examined, the doctor could find that you may and then have a little chat with the doctor. have a slight infection — be it yeast, fungal, If things are okay, then you simply schedule urinary — or, worse a sexually transmitted your next visit for a year later. If not, then you disease that you weren’t aware of. Any one of these could be cause for alarm, Photo Credit: Adria Richards, via Flickr. especially if left untreated.

Licensed under Creative Commons.

I know that women are ripe for yeast infections after a round of antibiotics. I sure know that one first hand. It’s easy to treat, especially if you get it early. Otherwise, you’re destined for a few rounds of medication before you get it knocked out.

A major portion of all well-woman visits is a pelvic exam. It may not be the most comfortable experience that you’ve ever had, but it is so important because while your doctor is checking things out, you’ll get a pap smear can discuss treatment options. I try to get my and, if warranted, a test for one of a number mammogram a month or longer before my of sexually transmitted diseases. A pap smear appointment so my doctor has the results to helps to determine if you are affected by share with me. That way you don’t have to go cervical cancer. back if your doctor requires this discussion Been in pain during a menstrual cycle or with you in person. beforehand? This could be a sign of someOne of the most humorous trips I had with thing more severe, like a fibroid (a growth that stirrups and a speculum was when I was a adheres itself to the uterine wall or elsewhere member of the Sexuality and Lesbian Task within the female reproductive organs), adheForce of the Memphis NOW chapter back in sions (scar tissue that runs amok and can atthe mid 1970s. We were able to get a demontach itself to your ovaries and fallopian tubes), stration and lecture on women’s health issues or tumors (either benign or malignant). presented by the University of Tennessee I remember one of my first exams. I was Medical School. The program director and in college and my editor sent me undercover staff were there to give us the 411 on reproto the school’s newly-instituted family planductive health. Hey, this was funny. Most of ning clinic to check it out. It was odd and I the women there were lesbians and were not felt like a slab of meat on a table. Since I did even thinking about having kids. I guess that not know the staff, I did not feel as welcome the staff was not used to a posse of dykes! or as comfortable with them. This comes Anyway, after the lecture, we were later on when you research doctors in your divided into smaller groups so that we could area with whom you can establish a rapport. actually see what a vagina and a cervix Anyway, the doctor will have you slide down looked like. We thought that we’d have a to the edge of the table with your feet in the film. Oh, were we naive. What we had was a stirrups so he or she can expand your vagirequest for two volunteers who would hop up nal canal with an instrument called a specuon an exam table and be willing to show their lum. This metal device comes in a few sizes, “female parts” to the rest of the gang. Well, so if the one they are using is too big, ask for I have to tell you that this was one of the a smaller one. It can make a big difference oddest meetings we ever had. One woman with how well you tolerate the procedure. who said yes was a small butch. She parked Your doctor may also choose to do a test for herself right up there and spread her legs colorectal cancer and accompanying exam.

This one requires a tiny smear of feces that see Exams on 20

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Oct. 13-26 . 2012

life

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Oh, no, it’s the smash monster!

Mammograms may be a bit uncomfortable, but they are necessary

by Lainey Millen :: lainey@goqnotes.com

I remember my first mammogram about 20 years ago. And, the reason was more chilling. It came when I discovered a lump in my breast when I was taking my morning shower that was not there even the day before. I went numb. I began to shake. I could not breathe.

You see, my older sister found a lump when she was 27 and it was tiny, about the size of a small pea, and seemed insignificant, or so her doctor thought. He went in to remove it and performed the cursory biopsy and found that it was malignant. I can still see the surgeon as he stood in the waiting room with Momma, my brother-in-law and I listening to him say, “It’s cancer.” Momma immediately said, “Oh, no, let it be me. I am old.” And, with that she and my brother-in-law gave the surgeon permission to remove the breast, lymph nodes and more to give my sister a better chance at survival. They called this procedure a radical mastectomy.

And, the year was 1972, not necessarily the protocol observed in today’s medical community. The following year, she found a lump in the other breast, but it was benign. We spent a few days in terror and tried to maintain some sort of composure. It was trying, painful and, at times, almost impossible. We were really scared.

When I found my lump, I was also shaken.

Was I going to find out the same thing? Was I

going to have to undergo what my sister had decades ago?

My doctor’s office gave me a same-day appointment so I could get this situation resolved, or at least figured out. He sent me down to the x-ray department to get “pictures.” This was before the advent of the equipment that is now used in diagnostic clinics across the nation. Gowned, I flailed myself all over the table. Lying this way and that to contorted ends. I had to sit on a chair next to the table and lay my breast on it so that they could get a top view. Not easy for most folks.

Afterward, I went back upstairs to see the doctor. He’d get a quick radiological read on the film and let me know. I waited. In the meantime, he attempted to get fluid out of the lump via a needle (they call it aspiration). He stuck and stabbed me until I thought I’d pass out, digging around, trying to find an entry point to no avail. It simply was too solid to penetrate.

They needed to explore the films more and told me that they’d call me on Monday morning (this was Friday afternoon). I could hardly sleep over the weekend. I was panicked.

On Monday, my doctor called. He said that they wanted to see how this looked in three months. I almost choked. I immediately told him I was not waiting for three months and that I

wanted it out now. I did not want the same thing to happen to me that had happened to my sister. He understood and ordered a surgery date that week.

I chose to have the procedure done under a local anesthetic. I did not want to be woken to find out something bad. I wanted to know immediately, if this were the case. Fortunately, the lump was just a fibrocystic mass and they got it all out, bandaged me up and sent me on to recuperate.

Photo Credit: Mass Communication Specialist 2nd Class Joseph Moon, I felt relieved, lucky that U.S. Navy, public domain. things were okay.

The next year, when exactly what I am talking about). She said, it was time for me to be checked out again, “put your feet flat on the floor.” I did that. they had purchased equipment that is similar But, my breast pulled out of the contraption. to that used today. The technicians were a bit We went through this exercise several more green in how to use it and for me, it was like a times until I said, “Look, I can either put my scene from a comedy show. breast on the plate or I can put my feet on I was asked to place my breast into the the floor flat, but not at the same time. You vise that smashed my boob until I thought see Smash on 15 it was going to explode (you women know

Oct. 13-26 . 2012

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Oct. 13-26 . 2012

life

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How does ‘Obamacare’ affect me?

Affordable Care Act will benefit women and LGBT people Even months after the passage of President Barack Obama’s landmark Affordable Care Act (ACA), many Americans are still confused about how the law will affect them and how new regulations will improve healthcare. For communities, like women and LGBT people, who often experience healthcare discrimination or have higher healthcare disparities, these doubts can be doubly concerning.

Now known colloqually as “Obamacare,” the Affordable Care Act covers a variety of important topics and institutes necessary changes. A primer below, with information compiled from U.S. Department of Health and Human Services fact sheets.

Women Women have healthcare needs that are both important and unique, for themselves and their families. The ACA provides important new benefits for women.

The new benefits include protections that prohibit insurance companies from denying coverage to women. Believe it or not, pregnancy is considered a “pre-existing condition” by some insurance companies.

When the full act takes effect in 2014, insurance companies will no longer be allowed to deny coverage to their customers due to any pre-existing conditions. Some insurance companies also charged women more for healthcare premiums when compared to men.

In 2014, such discriminatory pricing will no longer be legal.

The act also allows women to receive preventive care without the stress or burden of

copays. Such services include mammograms, new baby care and well-child visits, among others. The no-cost preventive services benefit applies to all health plans joined after March 23, 2010.

LGBT people Many of the same protections offered to women generally will also greatly benefit LGBT people. In much the same way that women have unique health needs, LGBT people often find themselves facing higher risks of cancer, STDs, depression and other medical circumstances. At the same time, also like women, LGBT people face increased obstacles to quality care and discrimination from healthcare providers and insurers.

By ending many discriminatory practices and forbidding insurance companies from denying coverage based on pre-existing conditions, LGBT people will have expanded access to healthcare. For those LGBT people who are infected with HIV/AIDS, the pre-existing rule will come in especially handy. The act also ends lifetime benefit limits and places restrictions on annual dollar limits imposed by insurance companies.

LGBT people will also benefit from expanded preventative care and new federal funding will help increase intervention programs addressing important LGBT health issues like tobacco use, obesity and HIV-related health disparities. : : info: You can learn more about the new healthcare act at healthcare.gov.

Smash monster continued from page 13

choose!” She finally lowered the plate so I could do both. What marvels communication gives us in outcome! And, thus the annual process continued.

For those of you who have never had a mammogram, it really is a simple procedure.

You don’t have to take anything, nor do you have to prepare in any specific manner, except you can’t wear lotions, powders, deodorant, antiperspirants or anything that might obscure the image. This is really important and it could serve to save your life.

There are a host of centers that can take you in with an appointment. They send the results to your doctor who will share the findings with you. From time to time, there are mobile units that go to communities to provide their services. Some of these are free of charge. Check to see if you qualify.

The N.C. Breast and Cervical Cancer Control Program provides free or low-cost screenings and follow-up to eligible women across the state. To be included, one should be between the ages of 40-64 who have a household income at or below 250 percent of the federal poverty level, are uninsured or underinsured and are without Medicare Part B or Medicaid. To find a local clinic, call 919-707-5300.

According to the Breast Cancer Resource Directory of North Carolina, state law “requires health insurance to cover screening mammograms, including one baseline exam for women ages 35-39, a mammogram every other year for women ages 40-49 and an annual mammogram for women age 50 and over.

Coverage may include more frequent exams for women at high risk. Medicare now covers mammograms every year.”

Early detection is important. If left too long, you may not survive. Don’t let fear stand in your way, whether it’s your first time or you are seasoned. This is especially imperative if you have family members who have had breast cancer. It can be familial. Genetic markers may make one person more susceptible than others. In some cases, women choose to have mastectomies as a prophylactic measure if there has been cancer in their family, like a mother or a sister.

Though costly, the genetic marker test can be something that some women use to make major healthcare decisions.

And, finally, men, you are not immune to breast cancer. Although more rare, it can indeed happen to you. Be sure to check with your physician if you are concerned and schedule an examination. : :

Oct. 13-26 . 2012

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a&e

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tell trinity

by Trinity :: qnotes contributor

Shaking off depression takes action Dearest Trinity, Life just doesn’t have the kick it once had. I don’t even want to get out of bed to walk the dog. Any ideas for shaking off depression?

Depressed, Baltimore, MD

To Trinity, I’m a handsome, fun and well-off gay man in my early 40s and not introverted. I think I’m a catch, but I can’t seem to catch anyone.

Catcher-less, San Antonio, TX

Dearest Depressed, Did you know that all living creatures are one day on top of the world and the next day in the gutter and the next on top of the world and so on. When we’re busy we never get depressed.

When we’re without work or projects, that’s when we hit bottom! This advice column came out of needing to beat a depression. So, pumpkin, start small with a short trip to a park, then a day at the beach then a weekend on the strip. Also, eat dark chocolate, sleep, exercise and watch funny movies. But, do something so something can happen. Come join the party ASAP.

To Catcher-less, Meeting men can be a lot harder than, lets say, catching a lobster in a trap, but not a lot different. It might be a) you’re methods of meeting or talking to someone are faulty; b) you stop trying once you get rejected; or c) you try too hard. It could also mean d) you need a makeover. Many of us forget that dating, like life, is a journey, a lesson, a constant succeed and fail. So, baby, a) ask friends to tell you what you’re doing wrong; b) never give up; and c) keep up with the fashions. Staying current is your best ally. (I’ve got some super tips about makeovers.

Take a look at my cartoon to learn more.)

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Oct. 13-26 . 2012

Dear Trinity, I’m not happy with the person whom I’ve been dating for the past nine years. I’ve wanted out

many times. My friends and family think I’m crazy. Do you think I’m crazy for giving up on nine years?

Making A Move, New Hope, PA Dear Making A Move, Friends and family always say, “Stick it out!”

And, there may be something behind that.

Thus, you may not be crazy, but you may be lazy! Separation and counseling versus breaking up is a better road, simply because it leaves you alternatives. On some level we create our life, the people in it and our situations so that we can learn more deeply about ourselves. With that, darling, see if your relationship troubles have to do with you not asking or even demanding what you need and want. Otherwise, start packing! Good luck.

Hey Trinity, I’m dating a married man. There, I finally said it. Help?

Dating Drama’s, Eugene, OR Hey Dating Drama’s, Yes, you are! You must have missed last years, “Ten Tips on Dating Someone Married,” so I’m gonna reprint them for you. But, listen kiddo, this path is definitely the hardest one. Good luck and here’s…

Trinity’s Top Ten Tips For Dating Someone Married 1. Keep asking your higher power, “How the hell did you get me into this mess?”

2. Don’t give presents that leave clues.

Especially undergarments. Accepting presents is fine.

3. Two’s company, but three can only bring cheaper rent. Hey! I think we’ve got something!

4. Forget fantasizing about the future. There is none!

5. Guilt & shame are for religious fanatics.

Forgiveness & self-respect are for enlightened realists.

6. Cologne and perfume are only worn when dating someone unmarried!

7. Adults have secrets! Honor their privacy and your own.

8. Be a classy hussy. If you must speak nasty about their spouse, don’t do it in front of them!

9. Have some smarts! Don’t sleep with anyone married until you have divorce papers.

10. Lastly, jewelry, art and leather give great return value, especially the day after they say, “Good-bye.” : : — With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking” a weekly radio drama performed globally and is now minister of WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings.

info:

telltrinity.com . Trinity@telltrinity.com.

Sponsored by: WIG Ministries, Gay Spirituality for the Next Generation! wigministries.org

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out in the stars

by Charlene Lichtenstein :: qnotes contributor

October 13 - 26 over their heads now. You are in love with love and give your heart to all comers. Try to be discerning and move in new social circles for your hunt. It would be a shame to ruin a perfectly good friendship by taking it on the wrong course. Love is in the air, but it sort of smells like broccoli.

GEMINI (05.22-06.21) Relationship issues are blown out of proportion now. There are many more demands on your time. Pink Twins may institute a zero tolerance policy and demand change, but hold off. Try instead to exert some patience with partners and would-be partners. It would be a shame to spend the upcoming party season sipping champagne with your cat. Hmmm, or is it?

CANCER (06.22-07.23) Gay Crabs find themselves buried under a load of paperwork on the job. And, no matter how fast you work, you will find it difficult to keep up with the increasing demands of the marketplace.

Before you give up and let things fall through the cracks, learn to prioritize, strategize and delegate. Escaping the humdrum is futile anyway right now.

LEO (07.24-08.23) Partyhound, proud Lions think that they can go the distance, but now you must put that thought to the acid test. It’s possible that in the spirit of the moment, you will imbibe that one drink too many and spend the next day hunkering down and avoiding loud noises. Instead of feeling your age the day after, I suggest that you behave your age the night before. Good luck.

VIRGO (08.24-09.23) This time period highlights family affairs. Queer Virgos are hankering to blow things out of proportion. Dramatics aside, there is nothing to be gained by pushing the familial hot button now. Instead of storming the scene, take a breath and draw your line in the sand a couple of months from now.

In the meantime, think only happy thoughts, and avoid sourpusses. : : © 2012 Madam Lichtenstein, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Entertainment. info: Visit TheStarryEye.com for e-greetings, horoscopes and Pride jewelry.

My book “HerScopes: A Guide To Astrology For Lesbians” from Simon & Schuster is available at bookstores and major booksites.

goqnotes.com

When is too much, too too much? Possibly when dreamy Venus squares energetic Mars.

Minor tremors become earthquakes, quiet interludes become basheroos and carefully concealed secrets go viral. So, prepare to be jousted, rousted and thrown for a cosmic loop.

Enjoy the ride.

LIBRA (09.24-10.23) Diplomacy may escape you as you may say the exact wrong thing at the wrong time. This can be very uncomfortable for you, but you can still do it in a charming manner. Proud Libras are best advised to keep their more revolutionary thoughts to themselves for the time being and tone their “must say” messages for a general audience.

When in doubt, just smile.

SCORPIO (10.24-11.22) This may seem like an opportune time to hit it big or lose it big in the financial arena. You are tempted to go for the big buckaroos without doing the necessary fact checking. Pyramid schemes seem like sure things. Yeah, right. It will be the truly wise, proud Scorp who realizes that all that glitters is not gold. In fact, it may not even be metal. Bite it to be sure.

SAGITTARIUS (11.23-12.22) Stand back and give the wild one some space when gay Archers let loose. This exuberant out-ofcontrol energy encourages you to boss the course in social situations. If folks don’t do things your way, tough! You are as subtle as a jack hammer and about as pleasant. Be careful of dominating others, unless, of course others prefer it that way.

CAPRICORN (12.23-01.20) Everything you have tried to hide in the past is exposed. As things begin to float to the surface, pink Caps are encouraged and ready to tell it like it is. It feels quite cathartic to dump your cosmic garbage on the highway, but be careful of throwing out too much. There is sure to be something (or someone) worth keeping, if you take time to separate the real trash from all the posturing.

AQUARIUS (01.21-02.19) Compadres demand more of your attention and personal resources. Give till it hurts Aqueerius — a favor to a friend in need will not be forgotten.

Of course, there may be some friends who become bottomless pits of need and greed.

In that case, draw the line and cut the ties of dependency quickly. They may even thank you, er, one day.

PISCES (02.20-03.20) Just when you thought your career was cruising on course, a strong gust of wind blows your roadmap out the window. And, yet, surprises are good for the soul and lead you to new, different opportunities. Dust yourself off and try try again. Once you get your juices going, you catapult to new heights. Don’t bump your head on the glass ceiling, Guppie.

ARIES (03.21-04.20) A simple excursion may evolve into an out-of-control adventure. Proud Rams often brace for excitement. Oh, be careful of what you wish right now! Plan all grand voyages carefully, sailor. The seas could suddenly become turgid and overturn your craft.

Let’s hope there will be some helpful seamen to give you a hand and pull you up.

TAURUS (04.21-05.21) Queer Bulls are ready to take the sexual plunge, but may jump in

daily news, blog posts and lgbt community event listings Sign up for our weekly e-newsletter: goqnotes.com/subs

Oct. 13-26 . 2012

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17

on the map nightlife

Midwood Madness, Petra’s half-price bottles of wine Karaoke, The Woodshed starts at 9 p.m.

Sunday

Barbeque & Bloody Marys, Bar at 316 free BBQ from 3-6 p.m.

The Sunday Social Spades/Card Games & House Muzik, Nickel Bar from 5 p.m.-Midnight House Cast Show, The Scorpio with DJ 4Real. 11:30 p.m.

Woodshed Sundays, The Woodshed free dinner buffet served at 6:30 p.m. karaoke, 9 p.m.

Friday

Game Night, Bar at 316 Team Trivia and Line Dancing, Hartigan’s starts at 8 p.m.

Karaoke, Petra’s hosted by Rachel Houdek. 9 p.m.

Wicked and Wild Wednesdays, The Scorpio featuring Tiffany Storm with DJ 4Real. 11 p.m.

Pool Tournament, The Woodshed starts at 10:30 p.m.

House DJ and Dancing, Bar at 316 Free HIV Testing, Connections the 4th Friday of every month. 8-10 p.m.

A-List Fridays, Marigny hosted by SugaWalls Entertainment. 10 p.m.

Feel Good Fridays Dance Night, Nickel Bar from 9 p.m.-2:30 a.m.

Live Performances, Petra’s Roxy’s Rainbow Review, The Rainbow In starts at 11p.m.

Life’s a Drag, The Scorpio with Tiffany Storm. 11:30 p.m.

Thursday

Saturday

Wednesday

Monday

Movie Night, Bar at 316 starts at 9 p.m.

Monday Madness, Chasers pool tournament at 11:30 p.m. $25 cash prize and $25 bar tab.

Boxing & Monday Night Football, Sidelines Free Pool, The Woodshed all day.

Thursday Night House Party, Bar at 316 Pool Tournament, Central Station Rockin’ Well Thursdays, Chasers with Valerie Rockwell. Show starts at 12:30 a.m.

Free HIV Testing, Connections the 2nd Thursday of every month. 8-10 p.m.

Karaoke Night, Hartigan’s hosted by Roxxy C. Moorecox. 9 p.m.

Team Boystown, Marigny starts at 10 p.m. $10 cover after 11 p.m.

Drink-n-drown.

SpeakEasy Thursday Open Mic Night, Nickel Bar from 9 p.m.-2:30 a.m.

Karaoke Night, The Rainbow In free for members. $5 guests. $6 under 21.

Tuesday

Karaoke with Metro Mike, Bar at 316 starts at 9 p.m.

Pool Tournament, Central Station Twisted Trivia, Chasers with Tiffany Storm & Brooklyn Dior.

Showtime at 12:30 a.m.

Trivia Tuesdays, Marigny hosted by Roxxy C. Moorecox 7 p.m.

Community

Underwear Night, The Woodshed

LGBT Community Center of Charlotte Seeks to promote diversity, acceptance and visibility of the LGBT community through original and collaborative programming and events and by providing an inclusive, welcoming and affordable environment for all.

1 820 Hamilton St., Suite B11 Charlotte, NC 28206 704-333-0144 gaycharlotte.com

House DJ and Dancing, Bar at 316 The Angela Lopez Show, Chasers show starts at 12:30 a.m.

Live DJ, Hartigan’s Krewe Saturdays, Marigny Sexy Saturdays Special Events, Nickel Bar from 9 p.m.-2:30 a.m.

Live Performances, Petra’s Urban Variety Show, The Scorpio with Elaine Davis. Midnight showtime.

White Rabbit North Carolina’s LGBT everything store. Complete line of Pride merchandise, plus magazines, books, DVDs, T-shirts, underwear, swimwear, athletic shorts, hats, hoodies, socks, and more.

920 Central Ave. 2 Charlotte, NC 28204 704-531-9988 . phone 704-531-1361 . fax info@whiterabbitbooks.com

info: Don’t see your bar listed here?

Submit your regularly scheduled events to editor@goqnotes.com Nightlife content the responsibility of each business listed.

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2 Central Station 2131 Central Ave. 3 Chasers 3217 The Plaza 4 Hartigan's Irish Pub 601 S. Cedar St.

6 Nickel Bar 2817 Rozzelles Ferry Rd.

10 The Woodshed

7 Marigny Dance Club Empire Lounge

11 Blue Bar

1440 S. Tryon St., Suite 110

8 Petra's Piano Bar & Cabaret

1919 Commonwealth Ave.

2301 Freedom Dr.

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goqnotes.com/to/life

20 Questions Jacob Whipple, Charlotte

Photo Credit: dav.d photography

by David Stout :: david@goqnotes.com

Two years ago Jacob Whipple moved to the Queen City from Salt Lake City. The home automation manufacturer he works for need-

ed a corporate trainer in Charlotte and Jacob grew up in the area and has family here. It was a good fit, he says, that has worked out well. He certainly seems to have settled into the community nicely — as evidenced by the fact that 20 Questions runs into him at LGBT events and nightlife shindigs all the time. But, that’s just…uh, a complete coincidence. No, really. That whole “stalking” thing was a massive, unfortunate misunderstanding. Seriously, it was. Why are you looking at me like that?

Er, anyway — I thought we’d all like to get to know Jacob a little bit better so read on, dear reader, for the questions and abdomi… answers! The questions and answers.

No. Has someone else painted them before?

Yes, for Pride. That shit’s hard to get off afterward!

What’s the perfect food to eat in the autumn?

Pumpkin pie, definitely.

How do these films rank based on the number of times you’ve seen them: “Bachelor Party,” “Big,” “Castaway,” “Philadelphia”?

I saw “Big” a few times growing up.

“Castaway” I saw once and hated. I’ve never seen “Philadelphia” or “Bachelor Party.”

Do you think ventriloquists are entertaining?

Generally, no. However, if you’re Jeff (you

have to pronounce the second “f”) Dunham, then I could watch you any day.

Who is your favorite live music act?

The best concert I ever went to was a Green Day and 311 show. But, I love seeing Linkin Park in concert.

How would you finish this sentence: “I know it’s a simple thing, but I really couldn’t get through the day without…”?

My gym time. I know it’s stereotypical sounding, but I love my gym time. It’s my release

see 20 Questions on 20

Does it serve a man better socially to have awesome biceps, pecs or quads?

A man needs all three, so strive to be the total package. But, arms are easier to show off in public.

If you searched under your couch cushions right now, how likely would you be to find loose change?

My friends are all cheap and only use credit cards. There’s no change to be found in the whole house.

Have you ever painted your toenails?

Oct. 13-26 . 2012

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life

goqnotes.com/to/life

20 Questions

Exams benefit healthcare

continued from page 19

time. Put all the stresses and cares of the day away and take it out on the weights. It’s always there for you, especially in the bad times, like after break-ups.

Do you own more underwear or blu-ray discs?

Though taken separately, I do have a lot of both, but my 400 disc-changer of BDs far surpasses my drawer of undies.

Have you ever tasted any type of pet kibble?

I have not. But, I have convinced two of my siblings to try it.

What profession other than your own would you most like to try?

I have often thought of writing. I have even attempted a couple of fantasy novels, but to no avail. If you can’t write every day, you lose the focus.

Which national magazine do you read most often?

I don’t read any magazines. I’ll check CNN and The New York Times in the morning and then I just Google anything else I want to know about.

Who is your all-time favorite TV sleuth?

I think I’d have to give that to Bones. I love all the tech and science involved.

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continued from page 12 Which decade produced the best music?

I’ll have to give it to the 2000s.

Can you do any tricks with a yo-yo?

Once, my friends and I all got yo-yos to try and learn tricks and be cool, but it was too hard and we quickly gave up.

So, no.

Do you have a yardstick in your home right now?

No, but I do have a tape measure.

Which comedy team is funnier: Abbott & Costello, The Three Stooges or The Little Rascals?

I’ve never really seen any of them, so I’m going to say Tom and Jerry.

Corn Flakes, Fruity Pebbles or Raisin Bran?

Fruity Pebbles, but I’d prefer Cocoa Pebbles if I could get them.

Did you have the board game Candy Land growing up?

Absolutely, and Chutes and Ladders, too.

All kids should be raised on those two games.

Which LGBT community fundraiser or event do you most anticipate each year?

White Party Palm Springs! : :

Oct. 13-26 . 2012

and grabbed a hold of the plastic speculums that were there for us to use. Everyone was totally shocked that she’d do this. Anyway, she was seemingly just fine with it as one-by-one, women took a gander at her and then moved on down the line to another room where a very feminine straight woman was doing the same thing. This time, we all blushed as we were in awe of her willingness to be so open-minded and, well, exposed!

I said that we each got a plastic speculum, right? What I did not tell you was how out-of-thebody experience it was when I took mine home and used it on myself. It reminded me of the first time I used a tampon. Shockcity! Where did it go? Could I get it out? Anyway, there I was lying on my bed with a mirror in hand and a flashlight propped up for illumination. I stuck the apparatus in and just watched in amazement. It went in!

I spread it open and looked in the netherlands of my interior regions to total wonder. So, that’s what I look like inside? Hey, that’s me! Wow! If I had been a lot more limber (like one of those contortionist acts), I might have been able to get a closer look. Being someone who has a love for physiology, I’d have jumped at the chance.

Hey, this was not going to happen, so I had to simply be accepting of the fact that I could not see myself without the aid of a mirror. Too bad!

(If you want to try this out yourself, ask your doctor if he/she can get you a plastic one to use.

Or, you can go online to find purchase resources and instructions on how to perform the process.

Remember, these are only to be used by you to prevent the spread of bacteria. You can share an order of onion rings, but not this!)

In today’s world, I am not sure that there would be such a level of shyness or shock as the nature of life has become much more accepting in the expression of things that are considered natural these days. I know that is not true for everyone, but you have to agree that we’ve come a long way. Twenty years ago, who would have every thought they’d see commercials for lubricant, feminine products and more so front and center?

So, ladies! If you have not had your annual visit or have never ventured out for one, now is the time to mount up and get into those stirrups. But, don’t expect to get a lollipop when it’s all done. Do ask for any information that you feel will benefit your overall health and will ensure that your body stays in top form. For those of you who have never been, be sure to get a referral from a friend or family member. They are often the best testament for a solid doctor who will be your ally in your quest for optimum health. : :

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Community Resources [Ed. Note — Each issue, qnotes prints various community resources we think our readers will find helpful. The resources rotate with each issue. This issue, we list HIV/AIDS support organizations, social organizations, support groups and student organizations. Next issue, we return to faith institutions, the issue after which we will again list advocacy organizations, arts groups, media organizations, philanthropic giving organizations and sports groups. If you don’t see your organization list or if you need to correct any contact information, please email editor@goqnotes.com with “Community resources addition/correction” as the subject line.]

HIV/AIDS Carolinas Care Partnership 7510 E. Independence Blvd.

Suite 105 Charlotte, NC 28227 704-531-2467 carolinascare.org House of Mercy 701 Mercy Dr. Belmont, NC 28012 704-825-4711 thehouseofmercy.org

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Mecklenburg County Department of Health 704-432-TEST (8378) charmeck.org/mecklenburg/ county/HealthDepartment/ CommunityHealthServices/ Pages/HIVSTDServices.aspx Planned Parenthood 4822 Albemarle Rd. Suites 103 & 104 Charlotte, NC 28205 704-536-7233 plannedparenthood.org/ health-center/ centerDetails.asp?f=2703

Oct. 13-26 . 2012

Pozitively Speaking pozitivelyspeaking.com Regional AIDS Interfaith Network 501 N. Tryon St. 4th Floor Charlotte, NC 28237 704-372-7246 carolinarain.org Rosedale Infectious Disease 103 Commerce Centre Dr. Suite 103 Huntersville, NC 28078 704-948-8582 rosedaleid.com

Social & Support Carolina Bear Lodge carolinabears.com Carolina Transgender Society carolinatransgender society.com Charlotte Bears charlottebears.com

Charlotte Black Gay Pride charlotteblackgay pride.com Charlotte Business Guild 704-565-5075 charlottebusinessguild.org Charlotte Gender Alliance charlottegenderalliance.info Charlotte Tradesmen charlottetradesmen.org

Chi Psi Omega Fraternity chipsiomegafraternity.org PFLAG Charlotte pflagcharlotte.org Prime Timers primetimersww.org/ charlotte/ TransFaith In Color Conference transfaithincolor.org

SC Pride comes to Columbia

Shenna Easton, left, Chad Michaels, top, Reina, bottom

The annual SC Pride Parade and Festival comes to the Palmetto State’s capital city on Oct. 20. A parade at noon and festival at 1 p.m. are the highlight of the activities, with headliners Sheena Easton, Chad Michaels and Reina. Other nightlife events, receptions and more are planned the week before and throughout the weekend. For more detailed information about the event, see the brief in our our regional news notes on page 6.

Q

events goqnotes.com/qguide/events

Oct. 13 • Charlotte Think Pink, Save Boobs Come celebrate with Blue Bar, in honor of our loved ones that have been touched by breast cancer. Let’s also bring more awareness to our community! Music provided by House DJ eLove and Sushi. $5 cover with proceeds donated to the American Cancer Society. Blue Bar, 2906 Central Ave. 9 p.m.

704-567-2158. facebook.com/BlueBarOnCentral.

Oct. 14 • Charlotte Latin American Festival One of Charlotte’s largest cultural events featuring internationally-recognized artists including multi-platinum Spanish band Jarabe de Palo and Latin Grammy Award-winning Venezuelan funk band Los Amigos Invisibles. Symphony Park, 4400 Sharon Rd. Noon-8 p.m. $5. latinamericancoalition.org/festivallatinoamericano/.

23 include a poetry workshop, student/faculty roundtable, lecture and book signing and reception. Keynote lecture at 7 p.m. at McKnight Hall on the campus of UNC-Charlotte. For more information, email outspoken@uncc.edu.

Oct. 17 • Charlotte General Election Reception Mecklenburg LGBT Political Action Committee (MeckPAC) invites you to enjoy a fall evening at the beautiful Myers Park home of Steven Chastain and Ian Kutner as the LGBT community and its many allies come together to learn how to make a real difference in this fall’s election. Candidates for County Commission will be on hand to meet you and to address the vital issue of LGBT equality. MeckPAC’s endorsements will be announced. 522 Hermitage Ct. 6-8 p.m. $20 donation requested at the door. For more information, visit meckpac.org.

Oct. 26 • Charlotte HalloQueen Dance Dance party and scream factory fundraiser. DJ Peter Presta spins. Extravaganza Depot, 1610 N. Tryon St. 8 p.m.-midnight.

Tickets $35 advance/ $40 at the door. onevoicechorus.com.

Oct. 18 • Charlotte Forum: Medical Emergencies The LGBT Community Center of Charlotte hosts members from MEDIC, Charlotte-Mecklenburg EMS, to discuss issues and questions related to the agency, emergencies and community outreach. LGBT Community Center of Charlotte, 820 Hamilton St., Suite B11. 7-9 p.m. Free. gaycharlotte.com.

Oct. 16 • Charlotte Openly Funny with Mimi Gonzalez The Comedy Zone Charlotte presents Openly Funny — a night of comedy to benefit The LGBT Community Center of Charlotte, featuring Mimi Gonzalez. The Comedy Zone, 900 NC Music Factory Blvd., Suite B3. 6:30 p.m. $20. 18+. 980-321-4702. cltcomedyzone.com.

Oct. 16 • Charlotte Forum: Candid Conversation About Sex Chi Psi Omega Fraternity, Inc., hosts part two of their “Community Forum: A Candid Conversation About Sex” with panelists: Alexandra Dean, licensed professional counselor; Reia Chapman, safe-sex education; Jermaine Nakia Lee, founder of the Powerhouse Project; Jaysen Foreman of the Regional AIDS Interfaith Network; and moderator Tanio Cox of Chi Psi

Submit your event to our new calendar!

Omega. Complimentary food and wine provided, courtesy Wet Willie’s and LGBT Community Center of Charlotte. Hosted at The Center, 820 Hamilton St., Suite B11. 7:30 p.m. gaycharlotte.com. chipsiomegafraternity.org.

Oct. 27 • Charlotte ‘Queer Queens of Qomedy’ Fundraiser for the Human Rights Campaign. Great Aunt Stella Center, 926 Elizabeth Ave. 8 p.m. $25 general admission/$40 VIP at action.hrc.org/site/Calendar?view=Detail&id=110301& autologin=true.

Staceyann Chin Photo Credit: Sophia Wallace

Oct. 23 • Charlotte OutSpoken with Staceyann Chin The University of North Carolina at Charlotte hosts Staceyann Chin, a famous spoken word artist whose work critiques racism, sexism, classism, heterosexism and imperialism. She has a very extensive portfolio that ranges from being a performer in the Tony Nominated, Russell Simmons Def Poetry Jam on Broadway to being featured on 60 minutes as well as having multiple other publications. Several events on campus on Oct.

You can now submit your event to a special comprehensive community calendar presented by qnotes, the LGBT Community Center of Charlotte and Visit Gay Charlotte. Submit your event at goqnotes.com/eventsubmit/ and get a three-for-one entry. All Charlotte-area events will appear on each of the three calendars at qnotes (goqnotes.com), the LGBT Center (gaycharlotte.com) and Visit Gay Charlotte (visitgaycharlotte.com).

Oct. 13-26 . 2012

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Oct. 13-26 . 2012