Moments Magazine - Winter 2020

ART . LUXURY . LIFEST YLE . DESIGN

a transition toolkit for educators

3

stages of healing

secondary

trauma in a post-COVID classroom a publication of and Project Leadership

compassion

fatigue

awareness and management

FLASH LESSONS to promote wellness in your classroom

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CONTENTS

WINTER 2020

This Moment

Insight from the Field

P.4

Safe & Engaged

P.6

Caring for Ourselves

Reconsidering Burnout

Learning from Our Peers

New Challenges, New Chapters

Moment for You

P.8

Profiles in Success

P.10

P.3

The Power of Calm Cowan Community Schools’ Lauren Hatch shares insight on brain science and behavior.

Mental Health First Aid

Moments of Change

Support in an Uncertain World

Volume 1, Issue 1

MOMENTS is a collaborative campaign of Delaware County schools and community partners celebrating mental wellness and social & emotional learning.

The Delaware County Comprehensive Counseling Coalition

P.13

Focus on the Stages of Healing

Critical Moments

Flash Lessons for Educators

P.14

Burris Laboratory School Cowan Community Schools Daleville Community Schools Inspire Academy Liberty-Perry Community Schools Muncie Community Schools Wes-Del Community Schools Yorktown Community Schools PRODUCED AND PUBLISHED BY Project Leadership

Social Emotional Lessons

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SPONSORED IN PART BY George and Frances Ball Foundation

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THIS MOMENT

NOTES FROM THE FIELD

LAUREN HATCH is the School-to-Home Liaison at Cowan Elementary School.

OUR CALM

BECOMES

THEIR CALM. of Conscious Discipline calls it the brain’s “emotional” or “survival state.”

Nancy Green of Brain Highways calls it the brain’s “protection mode,” and surely it goes by many other names as well. “It” is what happens when

WWW.CRITICALMOMENTS.COM

our brain is triggered. The lower, most primitive parts of our brains take over

THE POWER OF CALM Do you ever find yourself completely losing your cool?

Have you noticed yourself wondering, “Why am I feeling this way? Why am I acting this way?” You are not alone; we’ve all been there. And after enduring all of the changes and uncertainty that COVID-19 has brought us, these reactions may have become more frequent or more intense for you. After all, life is stressful! This goes for our students as well. And the reason is all about what is happening in our brains.

Experts call it different things. Dr. Becky Bailey of

without our conscious awareness.

These parts of our brains are designed to help us survive when our brain perceives a situation to be threatening. The brain can react, without really thinking or processing. This is meant to be a short-term response and the chemicals released during this process can wreak havoc on the body if our brains stay in this state long term. Not to mention that the longer and more frequently we are in this mode, the harder it is to get our brains back to where we want them to be, which is in the “executive state,” or “connection mode.”

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&

IS NT TH E OM M

SAFE ENGAGED

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“Students were thrust into a new world filled with isolation, confusion and anxiety about the health crisis that they were hearing so much about.”

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Will things ever be the same again?

Students will likely face

As students work

mental health issues as a result

through this school

of a traumatic and sudden loss

year, it is important to

of normalcy. Fear and anxiety

remember that they

can result from seeing tragedy

have been affected

played in repeat on television

emotionally by all of

and online. Students can

the changes COVID-19

experience simple burnout

has brought. Many

related to virtual learning.

will struggle with these effects for some

When teachers think of

time.

summer, their minds usually

LEAVING HOME

turn to worries over “summer

Focusing on positive

learning loss.” This is

practices such as

nothing new. There is always

routine, inclusion,

the chance of student

sharing

regression over the break.

experiences, and

However, learning loss in the

strong school-family

It was unprecedented. A school year brought to a screeching halt in midMarch by a global health crisis.

Some schools struggled and others flourished in the transition to provide online options for students and families.

post-COVID landscape is likely

relationships will be

to look much different. Closure

essential in making

due to COVID-19 was messy and

sure that all students’

caught many off guard. It took

needs are met. By

time to rollout online options.

working together to

Then, once they were in place,

build this safe and

access was often uneven. Some

welcoming

students were able to fully

atmosphere for

participate in virtual learning,

students to come back

and even thrived in doing so.

to, the transition back

Other students faced obstacles

can be successful for

such as lack of internet access,

everyone.

Still, one thing was unavoidable. The impact of this sudden change was significant in the lives of American students.

Students were thrust into a new world filled with isolation, confusion and anxiety about the health crisis that they were hearing so much about.

disengagement and a general lack of focus.

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N New Beginnings

Jasiona graduated with the Class of 2020 and is now enrolled in the nursing program at Ivy Tech.

One day at a time.

That day-by-day strategy is a 2020 mantra for student Jasiona Allen and her mother, Neeka Burtley.

A 2020 Muncie Central graduate, Jasiona has

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over the past six months – graduated high school and started college this fall in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic.

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Students & families face new COVID-19 challenges & chapters

NEW CHALLENGES, NEW CHAPTERS “At first, it was stressful because of online classes – not just for me, but also my friends – because we’d never had to do that,” says Jasiona of those early days.

In the beginning, not having to go to school was fun, she says, but quickly adds: “It got boring after awhile, especially when we found we were never going back.”

“

My mental state of mind was the worst.

Closure was difficult.

FaceTime helped. So did talking with friends about the unfairness of a senior year without long-awaited traditions.

“It was stressful,” she says.

“I listened to music a lot.”

Over the summer, COVID-19 found its way inside Jasiona’s inner support circle. Her mother,

a nursing home worker, had contracted the disease.

Physical virus symptoms permeated Neeka’s body, including body aches, headaches, and an overall sensation that she’d been run over. Then came something harder.

“My mental state of mind was the worst,” Neeka says. “It really messed me up for awhile.”

Neeka, a self-described social person who thrives from being around people, faced three cycles of quarantine in her room isolated from her family of five. “I never knew that my mental health would get down like that,” says Neeka, who reached for help from an online medical team. One day, she says, she told her doctors: “I just wished I’d die.”

This fall has brought healing for Neeka and a new chapter for Jasiona.

“I’m feeling better now,” Neeka says, adding that her deep gratitude prompted thank-you presents to the medical team who helped her. “I learned you have to take it one day at a time. And it really does help to have people to talk to that understand it. You never know by looking at the outside of someone what’s going on inside.”

Jasiona is working to adjust to online classes at Ivy Tech in her pursuit of a nursing degree and her dream of one day working in a hospital.

“Some days it’s kind of hard, and some weeks it’s fine,” Jasiona says.

She offers this advice to other students who are struggling to navigate through changes brought about by the pandemic: “Try not to be hard on yourselves.

Everything will be okay.

Take it day by day.”

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COMPASSION FATIGUE Caregivers can experience compassion fatigue when caring for others who have lived through trauma. Those who experience compassion fatigue take on the trauma of the students they care for which can lead to stress and mental and physical exhaustion.

“E

The good news is that it doesn’t last forever.

verybody’s been there before.

Maybe you’re in that long stretch after spring break and feel like you just don’t have much more to give. Maybe you feel exhausted and that there’s no light at the end of the tunnel.

Often, we call it burnout, and this may be exactly what it is. Sometimes these feelings can indicate something that seems similar, but that is, at its core, very different.

Sometimes, what we’re feeling is called compassion fatigue.

File photo provided by Wes-Del Community Schools.

Compassion fatigue, much like burnout, is accompanied by feelings of stress and exhaustion. You’ve likely felt that before, but with compassion fatigue these feelings are caused by how intensely you care about those who are suffering from the impact of trauma or are under significant emotional distress. It’s often accompanied by mental and physical exhaustion and can sometimes lead you to withdraw emotionally from the things that matter to you.

RECONSIDERING

T EN U O OM Y M R FO

While burnout is often the culmination of exhaustion and helplessness, compassion fatigue is often the result of taking on the trauma of the students you are serving. It comes from working to understand students’ suffering and becoming absorbed in their trauma. It comes from tireless and

BURNOUT

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QUICK TIPS

FOR CONFRONTING COMPASSION FATIGUE CONNECT WITH COLLEAGUES

EXPLORE RESOURCES

TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR SPACE

PRIORITIZE EMOTIONAL WELL-BEING

Find trusted peers to help you bear the load.

Clarify boundaries and be intentional about what you take home at the end of the day.

Find materials to enhance awareness and inspire self-care.

Remember you must make sure that you are at your best to help your students get there as well.

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unending effort and a failure in prioritizing self-care.

School staff members care deeply about their students.

Through this caring, we are exposed to trauma that students are facing every day.

Examples of trauma might include poverty, grief, family problems, hunger, racism, illness, neglect, or any number of other traumatic experiences. Far too often, we take these traumas home with us in the evenings and on weekends, and allow them to become draining in our lives.

“

This feeling can be debilitating.

Compassion fatigue often comes with a feeling of being burdened by the hardships of others.

Those who work with youth often experience, but with compassion fatigue, this feeling can be debilitating.

Those facing compassion fatigue can often feel isolated and disengaged as they begin to

File photo provided by Inspire Academy.

take on some of the same feelings of helpless when we feel that we could be doing more for students. Maybe most problematic, compassion fatigue can lead school staff to feel guilt or shame for taking pleasure in things when children are not able to. This can lead to a self-perpetuating cycle that is difficult to break.

Compassion fatigue can have a great impact on quality of life. But the good news is that it doesn’t last forever. School faculty and staff who are able to refocus on self-care may find that making time for the things that bring joy may help curb compassion fatigue.

Meaningful and restful sleep can help break the cycle.

Listening to music, journaling, and regular exercise are just some of the ways to cope with compassion fatigue and begin the process of moving forward. It can often be a difficult task, but working to reduce stressful workloads is important in combatting compassion fatigue.

A DEEPER DIVE RESEARCH AND RESOURCES

Professional Quality of Life Questionnaire

Provides feedback about compassion fatigue, burnout, and stress for anyone who spends a good deal of time helping others. intoolkit.com/qlquestionnaire

Secondary Trauma Self-Care Packet

Tools and strategies to help create individual and schoolwide plans to promote staff self-care and resilience. intoolkit.com/selfcarepacket

Compassion Fatigue Resources

The National Association of Case Management has put together an exhaustive list of quality resources to learn more about compassion fatigue. intoolkit.com/cfresources

File photo provided by Wes-Del Community Schools.

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Mental Health First-Aid training is coming to Delaware County. Here’s what educators need to know about this opportunity.

What will participants learn?

Participants will learn risk factors and warning signs for mental health challenges common among adolescents.

There will be a focus on strategies to support youth developing signs and symptoms of mental illness or an emotional crisis.

Who should participate?

This course is designed for adults who regularly interact with young people.

Teachers, school staff and coaches could all benefit from Mental Health First-Aid training. This specific pilot training is open for teachers at all grade levels.

Why now?

In the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic, more students may be at risk for developing the anxieties, depression and disruptive behaviors that Mental Health First-Aid is desgned to address. This is a tool that school faculty and staff can use to ease the transition back into the classroom for the 2020-2021 school year.

MENTAL HEALTH

FIRST-AID

I

n Indiana, teachers are

many do not know how to

required to be certified in

respond when someone is having

CPR. The reason is clear. In

a panic attack or showing signs

an emergency where a student’s

of emotional abuse. That is

life is at stake, there must be an

changing in Delaware

adult present who can step in

County thanks to funding from

at a moment’s notice and give

the Community Foundation

life-saving aid to a young person

and Ball Brothers Foundation,

in need. While most may know

training from Meridian Health

what to do when someone is

Services, and collaborations with

choking or having a heart attack,

Delaware County schools,

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GETTING ON BOARD Project Leadership, and

illness or provide

we can prepare our

the Delaware County

therapy but rather

educators to recognize

Comprehensive Coun-

teach educators about

those signs of trauma,

seling Coalition. A pilot

the signs and

the better they will be

program launching

symptoms of mental

able to help the

this fall will train 175

illness or

students they’re

educators and staff to

emotional crisis. A

serving.”

equip school

five-step action plan

personnel with the

includes assessing

There is an additional

tools and skills to

the risk for harm,

benefit to the training.

support youths in their

listening, providing

mental health and

reassurance,

“It is important

manage the potential

encouraging

because we have an

effects of the COVID-19

professional help,

issue with mental

pandemic.

and encouraging self-

health in our country,

ALGEE is a five-step action plan

help strategies.

the stigma

at the heart of Mental Health

“COVID creates a lot

The expectation of the

surrounding it, and the

more uncertainty and

training is not about

level in which it goes

First-Aid.

anxiety with kids,”

turning educators into

undiagnosed,” Mathis

says Carrie Schad,

mental health

says. “By having more

Director of Children’s

professionals but

people become

Services for Meridian

rather providing

educated in mental

Health Services, which

educators with

health, we can identify

is facilitating learning

additional information

needs, reduce stigma,

Listen non-judgementally.

sessions with certified

and strategies for

and get youths the help

trainers. “We’re seeing

their classroom

they need faster.”

issues with depression

toolboxes, says Lori

The Community

GIVE

and anxiety at an

Mathis, Director of

Foundation and Ball

earlier age.”

Community Health

Brothers Foundation

at Meridian Health

funding will make it

Services.

possible to train at

Encourage appropriate

least two educators per

professional help.

ENCOURAGE

The evidence-based training program being used in

“Unfortunately, some

school building in each

Delaware County is

youths are in unstable

district in Youth

called Youth Mental

home environments

Mental Health First

Health First Aid. Its

experiencing

Aid.

purpose is not to

additional trauma,”

diagnose mental

Mathis says. “The more

ALGEE ACTION PLAN ASSESS

Assess risk for suicide or harm.

LISTEN

Give re-assurance & information.

ENCOURAGE

Encourage self-help and other support strategies.

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(CONTINUED FROM PAGE 3)

“

A room full of students in emotional or survival state can be completely overwhelming, especially when there will be pressure to make up for lost time academically.

The prefrontal cortex is where

that we are safe, and that we can handle this.

our brilliance, our wisdom, our

Nancy Green would tell us to breathe deeply

problem-solving abilities live.

and ask ourselves, “How do I want to be?”

These are the skills we want

When we start to understand what is

to be able to access in difficult

happening in our own brain, it helps us

situations that are not truly

become attuned to what is happening in the

life threatening. For those of

brains of our students, which is powerful.

us who work with children,

Those behaviors that are triggering you are

there is a long list of things

clues that are telling you what is happening in

that our brains perceive to be

their brains. If our brains are too busy helping

threatening that will send us

us survive each perceived threat, then we will

down into protection mode

miss precious moments of opportunity when

fast. Things like eye rolling,

we can be connecting with students and

whining, swearing, crying,

literally changing and healing their brains.

back talk, lying, etc. The list

Our ability to keep operating from the

of triggers can go on and on.

prefrontal cortex is key. When we are calm

What are yours?

and composed, we can choose connection over

As students have returned

protection. This connection can

to school, there are likely

literally rewire the brain. Taking moments

many little brains that are not

throughout the day to be present, look into

operating in their

the eyes of our students, smile, be playful, and

executive states. Our children

connect with them, helps them operate from

have experienced trauma on

their executive state, which is where learning

many different levels. A room

takes place in the brain. Our calm becomes

full of students in emotional

their calm. Our ability to self-regulate

or survival state can be

becomes their ability to self-regulate.

completely overwhelming,

You cannot teach what you don’t know. So

especially when there will be

practice, a lot. Start noticing what is

pressure to make up for lost

happening in your brain. The ultimate goal is

time academically. Dr. Becky

for our children to be able to keep themselves

Bailey would tell us to breathe

composed, regardless of the stressful situation.

deeply and remind those

It is possible, and it starts with us.

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ABOUT THE

COALITION

Lauren Hatch serves on the Delaware County Comprehensive Counseling Coalition. The Coalition has, for the first time ever, brought together stakeholders from around the county to focus on the social emotional learning of Delaware County students in grades K-12. School counselors, social workers and administrators gather with community partners each month to collaborate and share best practices.

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STAGESOF HEALING Childhood trauma involves an overwhelming or upsetting experience which is referred to as a traumatic event.

THE HEALING PROCESS

I

n the wake of

upsetting and, in some

COVID-19, it is helpful

cases, devastating.

for children to process

As children work

and work through trauma

through the trauma

associated with the

of COVID-19 it is helpful

pandemic. Children have

to integrate the 3 stages

likely experienced trauma

of healing. The three

Individuals establish personal

as a result of school

stages of healing are

security, learn coping skills to

closing and time spent

1. Safety & Stabilization,

manage strong emotions and feelings,

sheltering at home.

2. Remembrance &

and learn self-care strategies.

COVID-19 was sudden

Mourning, and 3. Re-

and overwhelming. Many

connection &

children find

Integration.

1 2 3

Safety and Stabilization

Remembrance and Mourning Individuals review traumatic

themselves in isolation.

The lessons that follow

This isolation can be

are structured around the

events they have endured and process

new and scary for

first of these three stages.

emotions in order to work through grief.

children. Children feel

Divided into lessons for

anxious and uncertain

elementary, middle, and

when they went from

high school, these are

in-person classes to

designed to be used in

eLearning. Some students

a class or group setting

the process they have learned by

found the loss of access to

by anyone working with

implementing coping skills and self-care

school services

young people.

Reconnection and Integration Individuals build upon

strategies in their daily lives.

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CLASSROOM GUIDE ELEMENTARY - SAFETY AND STABILIZATION

FLASH LESSONS

The three stages of healing from trauma are Safety and Stabilization, Rememberance and Mourning and Reconnection and Integration. This elementary lesson equips students with the knowledge and skills to take control of their senses and focus their attention on finding calm in moments of emotional distress.

DIGGING IN Opening Message/Discussion: Who can share about a time when you got hurt? Maybe it was a skinned knee. Maybe you twisted your ankle.

Teacher’s note: Take a moment and allow the class to discuss. Ask additional questions to encourage sharing.

We all know that it’s difficult to focus and take care of something that you’ve hurt when you are in pain, when you are crying or when you are scared.

You’ve got to wash and put a bandage on a cut. You need to get an adult to look at that twisted ankle. What kinds of things do you do to calm yourself when you need to focus on taking care of something when you are in pain?

Teacher’s note: Discuss the students’ ideas and offer some of your own to supplement.

CONNECTIONS Activity: Pain is a feeling. It’s something that none of us like to feel, but it’s something that we all experience sometimes.

In everything that we do, we all have five specific tools that we can use to help us make sense of the world around us. These are our five senses.

Each and every one of us have five senses that we use to learn more about the things around us. We use our eyes, our ears, our hands, our noses and our tongues to understand what’s going on around us. Who thinks that they can tell the class what one of our five senses are?

Teacher’s note: Allow students to share. If needed, remind students of the parts of their body that pair with each of their senses. You can give examples of how we use the senses as well.

Very good. Our five senses are sight, hearing, taste, touch and smell. We use all five every day in everything that we do.

Think back to that time where you may have gotten hurt. What did you hear? What did you see? What about smell? Who wants to share what they felt?

On this sheet, I’d like everyone to draw a picture of one thing that I might find in your house. It could be anything. An apple, a bar of soap, a shoe. Draw this in the circle in the middle. It could come from any room, but should be just one thing. Then, in the boxes around the outside write one of the senses and a word that describes the object using that sense.

Teacher’s note: Pass out the Five Senses at Home sheet and allow students time to complete all five of the senses. Afterward, allow students to share examples.

BIG PICTURE Activity: Teacher’s note: For this activity you will want to have a small collection of objects to challenge students to identify using senses other than their sight. Consider using items that students can use all of their senses to identify. An orange, a lemon, a pickle or a soft-pretzel would be things that students could use all of their senses to identify.

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FOR ELEMENTARY SCHOOL STUDENTS ourselves. It’s important that we do this same thing when the hurt that we are feeling is on the inside instead of the outside.

One great way we can do this is by checking in with our senses, ourselves and the world around us.

When we feel hurt on the inside we may cry. My eyes are crying. My vision is kind of blurry, but I can still make sense of the world using my other senses.

I want to challenge some of you to do exactly this. I will pick three or four volunteers to come up to be blindfolded. Once you are not able to see, I will give you an item and you need to use your other four senses to identify exactly what you are holding.

Teacher’s note: Have volunteers face the class. Their classmates will likely find this amusing. Keep your objects hidden from view until the student is blindfolded. Once they are guessing, you may need to remind them to use all four of their remaining senses to identify the object.

INTO ACTION Activity: Today, we’re going to practice an activity that can help you during moments of pain - whether the pain is on the outside or on the inside of your body. This is something that can help if you’ve just banged your knee on the lunch table, but it can also help when you feel like no one is listening to you.

The first step is to take a deep belly breath. Everyone put your hands on your belly. Breathe in deeply, but don’t stick out your chest. We want that breath to go deep. All the way into your belly.

Teacher’s note: Watch the students closely. Make sure they’re taking a breath all the way into their diaphragm. As students are filling up with air, say the following.

Once you’ve filled up your belly with air, you can start letting it back out. Don’t blow the air faster or slower than when you breathed in. Keep it as smooth as you can until you’ve emptied it all out.

Now, we’re going to focus on those five senses: seeing, touching, hearing, smelling and tasting.

Teacher’s note: Share the Grounding with Your Five Senses poster with the class. You may want to select a specific place for it to hang where all students can see it. Additionally, you may want to have mints or small candies on hand for the “taste” portion of this activity.

On this poster you will see all five of your senses and for each of these senses there is a number. What I would like for you all to do is take a moment and focus on the first of our senses: seeing.

Who can focus and name five things that you can see right now?

Teacher’s note: Allow five students to share things that they can see in the classroom. Continue the activity with the rest of the senses.

Thank you all for sharing. What feelings did you have as you worked through this activity?

The purpose of this activity is to work on focusing your attention away from those things that are hurting you. These are the things both inside and out. If you’re feeling sad, or angry, taking time to focus on your senses like this can help you calm down and find the solutions that you need.

MAKE IT YOURS Extended Learning: Teacher’s note: With the Grounding with Your Five Senses poster hanging in your classroom, you can continue to reference and reinforce this strategy with students as they encounter emotional distress during their school day.

Encouraging students to “take a deep belly breath” and “give me five” can become a classroom routine that you revisit multiple times during the school day.

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CLASSROOM GUIDE SAFETY AND STABILIZATION

FLASH LESSONS

The Safety and Stabilization phase of healing involves refocusing emotions by utilizing positive practices.

This lesson introduces self talk and the importance of positive self-talk. Students will provide examples of positive encouragement that they have encountered and how it has helped them grow. By using positive self-talk students can continue to grow and build positive self esteem.

DIGGING IN Opening Message/Discussion: We have conversations every day. Some conversations are more important than others. Some happen at school. Some happen at home. Some of the most important conversations that we have happen without words being spoken at all. These are the conversations that we have with ourselves about ourselves.

Self-talk is the dialogue that is going on inside of each and everyone of us, and it’s happening all the time. It’s the process of defining who you are, what you are capable of, and it’s how we hold ourselves accountable for our successes and failures.

It’s very important that we understand the role of self-talk and how it affects us. If your self-talk tends to be more positive then you will tend to be more confident and productive. If your self-talk tends to be more negative then you’re more likely to have low-self esteem and struggle to overcome emotional obstacles.

There are people in your world who think and say positive things about you. It may be a family member, a teacher, a coach or friend, but there are people who support you with positive feedback. How can you reflect this in your self-talk? What would that look like?

CONNECTIONS Activity: Think about those people who give you positive feedback. Why do they do this? Do they have to? Do they ever give you negative feedback?

How did this negative feedback impact you?

Negative feedback can make you feel stuck or feel low. Positive feedback has the opposite effect. It is uplifting. It is motivating and encouraging.

The thing about positive feedback is that it can differ from person-to-person.

What may be encouraging to you may not be as encouraging to someone else. I’d like everybody to share examples of what you might feel is encouraging. On this Positive Talk sheet, I’d like everyone to write a message that you would feel is positive and uplifting. Think about something that you would like to hear about yourself.

Teacher’s note: Give students time to complete their sheet. Afterward, allow students an opportunity to share their phrases and explain why they’d find them encouraging.

BIG PICTURE Activity: What are some things or who are some people that help you grow?

Teacher’s note: Encourage students to share their thoughts. These might include things such as food and water help you grow physically, education to grow mentally, your friends and family help you grow by loving and supporting you.

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BIG PICTURE Activity:

FOR MIDDLE SCHOOL STUDENTS

What are some things or who are some people that help you grow?

Teacher’s note: Encourage students to share their thoughts. These might include things such as food and water help you grow physically, education to grow mentally, your friends and family help you grow by loving and supporting you.

Positive encouragement is also something that can help you grow. Without it, it sometimes becomes difficult to maintain motivation toward your goals. And with it, you can sometimes go much further than you thought.

In each circle, list something that helps you grow. This could be anything, but make sure that you consider all of the different ways that we grow. Make sure that you list at least four.

INTO ACTION Activity: We’ve talked about what and who helps you grow. We’ve given some thoughts to the self-talk that keeps us encouraged and motivated. Putting these two things together is like putting light and water together for a flower. Each one of them is important to that flower’s health, but neither alone can sustain it. You need to have both working together for the flower to thrive. In the same way, you need both the positive self-talk and the support of others to stay emotionally healthy and ready to grow and learn.

Teacher’s note: Pass out the Flower Power sheet to the students. Make sure that students have access to scissors, glue and any other supplies that might be useful in decorating their flowers.

You may notice that this flower does not have any petals. That’s okay. Petals can only grow when there is light, remember?

In our case, our “light” is our self-talk. What I would like you to do is to write your name in the center of your flower. Then you can draw petals around the outside. Make sure that you include at least five petals on your flower. Then, in each petal write a positive “I am” statement. It could be “I am smart.” “I am cool.” “I am very good at running.” Keep them positive and relevant to you personally.

Teacher’s note: Give students time to complete their flower. Students who get done early can color their petals or elaborate on their designs until the class is done.

We just talked about the fact that flowers need water in addition to light in order to thrive. Of course, our water is going to be represented by the people and things that help as grow. We’ve already written these inside the circles on the sheet.

Please cut these out and place them above the flower to represent the rain that helps the flower to thrive.

MAKE IT YOURS Extended Learning: Teacher’s note: Display the students’ flowers in the classroom. Use them to remind students of their systems of support and positive self-talk that helps keep them motivated.

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CLASSROOM GUIDE SAFETY AND STABILIZATION

FLASH LESSONS

In this lesson students will identify emotions and learn coping skills to manage different emotions.

Students will work to differentiate positive coping skills from negative and learn their value in moments of strong emotional response.

DIGGING IN Opening Message/Discussion: Let’s take the emotional temperature in the room. What emotion is everyone feeling right now? Is it anger? Is it happiness?

Is it boredom? Raise your hand and let us know.

Teacher’s note: Write down students’ emotions so that they can see them. Encourage students to dig deeper to define their emotions precisely. “Happiness” may be too vague. Is it “excitement?” Is it “contentment?” Drill down to create an exhaustive list.

Looking at this list, I’m sure that you see many of these emotions are similar or related. Let’s organize these emotions into categories.

Teacher’s note: Work with the students to build four groupings for the emotions that they identified: Feeling Down, Feeling Fine, Feeling Distracted, Feeling Angry. Allow discussion about why emotions should be grouped, but come to a class consensus when there is disagreement.

CONNECTIONS Activity: When you find yourself confronted with some of these emotions, it’s important to know how to handle them. Coping skills are those activities that we engage in to help us manage emotions. Sometimes we have to make extra effort to tap into coping skills that we need. Other times, coping skills are habits that we’ve developed over a lifetime to manage emotional distress or even minor emotional discomfort. We all use coping skills to bring us back to the point of comfort and calm. We do it all the time whether we are aware or not.

Let’s try an exercise.

Teacher’s note: Give each student a slip of paper and set a timer for seven minutes.

I have set this timer for seven minutes. I would like everyone to remain silent during this time. The ONLY thing that I’d like you to concentrate on is observing the classroom, and noting one coping skill that you see on the slip of paper in front of you.

Teacher’s note: Allow the time to expire and ask students to share the coping skills that they observe.

Why do you think that everyone was using coping skills during the seven minutes of silence? Do you think most people were aware that they were engaging in coping skills? Did you see any coping skills that you feel were being engaged intentionally? What are some other situations where you might engage some of these same coping skills?

We sometimes even engage in coping skills when we don’t even know what we’re doing.

BIG PICTURE Activity: We’ve talked a bit about the coping skills that each and every one of us engage on a daily basis. Generally speaking, these are positive, meaning that they safely, responsibly and successfully help us manage emotions that distress or discomfort us.

The reality is that not all coping skills are positive. In fact, it may be that negative coping skills are the first to surface when P. 1 8 | M o m e n t s M a g a z i n e . W i n t e r 2 0 2 0

FOR HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS facing emotional distress.

Teacher’s note: Pass out one Stressful Situation card to each of the students and allow them time to ready their scenario.

Take a look at the scenario on your card. I would like everyone to think about two things. First, think about a negative coping skill that someone might be tempted to engage to manage this emotionally stressful situation. Second, I would like you to think of a positive coping skill that someone could engage.

Teacher’s note: Allow students time to consider their scenario and positive and negative coping skills that may relate. Then, ask students to share just their scenario and the negative response. Discuss after each example.

Does this feel like a really negative coping skill that someone might engage in this scenario? What makes it negative? What are the potential consequences of engaging this coping skill.

Teacher’s note: Now, ask students to share their scenario and the positive response. Discuss after each example.

Does this positive coping skill seem like an effective way to manage the emotions of the situation. Why or why not?

INTO ACTION Activity: Looking back at the emotions that we identified in the beginning, which one of these groups would you identify as the place where you would be most comfortable emotionally? This is our destination. No matter what emotional challenges we face, our goal is to get as close to this place as we can. The only way to do that is by engaging positive coping skills.

Let’s divide the class into three different groups.I will assign each group one of our four emotional groupings. Your job as a group is to create a short skit of less than four minutes that shows two things. Your skit has to show someone in an emotional crisis that relates to your grouping. Then that person has to demonstrate how they might use a coping skill to get back to our destination of “Feeling Fine.” You can choose either a positive or a negative coping skill, but do your best to think about what would be realistic for your situation.

Teacher’s note: Allow the groups time to develop their skit. Encourage multiple group member to participate in portraying their scenario.

Once students have had time to develop their skit, give time for each group to perform. After each performance ask the class to consider what they have watched.

Was this a positive or negative coping skill? Will it get the students to the point of “Feeling Fine?” What are the potential consequences of this negative coping skill? Is this a coping skill that you could or have used in your life? What are other options that the student could have considered?

MAKE IT YOURS Extended Learning: Teacher’s note: Establish an emotional check-in to use in your classroom. You can use it to decide as a class or individually what emotional groupings they are in. Based on this, you can engage in any number of coping activities to process toward “Feeling Fine.”

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8 12,454 1 school systems

K-12 students

common cause

Personal success

...one Delaware County student at a time.