Rolla Community Matters July 2019

Rolla Presbyterian Manor

JULY 2019

Three things to forget

By Allen Teal, chaplain

Meet Mission Committee members Bill Cottingham and John Kingston

Each senior living community in the Presbyterian Manors of MidAmerica system has a Mission Committee comprised of volunteers who are responsible for supporting and enhancing the services provided at each local campus. At Rolla Presbyterian Manor, we are fortunate to have Bill Cottingham and John Kingston as members of our dedicated and hard-working Mission Committee. Here’s a little more about them.

Dr. Bill Cottingham Bill Cottingham is serving his second term on the Mission Committee and has been a member for about five years.

He’s on the membership subcommittee, which helps identify new members. He was recruited to join the Mission Committee by a friend who was in his position several years ago.

“I was recently retired. A good friend of mine I grew up with was on the committee, and they were looking for members. He called me and I had the time, so Dr. William “Bill” Cottingham I accepted the challenge. I am a retired physician with a specialty in internal medicine. A large percentage of my practice was 60-plus, and I always had an interest in that area. This was something I was interested in doing in my retirement years,” said Bill.

“I forgot.” How many times have you said or heard these words?

Human memories are far from infallible. I know of a man who forgot to go to a memory competition after spending weeks preparing. While we mark things for remembering, some need forgetting.

“God has made me forget all my hardship.” (Genesis 41:51, ESV).

Joseph said these words following the birth of his first son. In Genesis, his brothers threw him in a pit and sold him into slavery.

Years later in Egypt, God blessed him with power, wealth and a family. To enjoy the bounty he had received, Joseph needed to put the past behind him. God helped him to forget the hardships created by his brothers. Any leftover bitterness and resentment evaporated as he forgave past wrongs. When you forgive, you must be willing to forget.

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.” (Isaiah 43:18, NIV).

Bill grew up in Rolla, graduated from Rolla High School and practiced medicine in Rolla for 36 years before retiring. He has friends living at Presbyterian Manor and encourages others to consider it when the time is right.

Time only runs in one direction.

We can only visit the past in our memories. Wanting things to be the way they were is rarely a productive use of our time or ability. It may sound cliché, but the

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-Chaplain, continued on page 4

Rolla Presbyterian Manor | A PMMA COMMUNITY

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-Mission, continued from page 1

“I think they would be impressed by the community, impressed by the opportunities they get and all of the programs they have for their residents. They will be well cared for. I can’t think of a place that does as much for the residents and to meet their needs,” said Bill.

It’s a level of care that ties back to the PMMA mission.

“The mission of the Presbyterian Manor is to support the residents and their needs to make their retirement more fulfilling. The organization is very caring, and I’m really impressed by what they do for all of the people here – whether it’s independent living or assisted care to providing entertainment and education of all kinds to fulfill their needs. It’s just an outstanding organization, and I’m very happy and privileged to be involved in assisting the organization in meeting the needs of the residents and even the staff and management of the campus,” said Bill.

Bill and his wife Pamela will celebrate their 47th wedding anniversary this summer.

They have two grown children, two grandsons, a granddaughter and two step-granddaughters who they really enjoy spending time with.

In addition to sharing time with family, Bill shares his hobby of playing the guitar with his oldest grandson. “He took up guitar over

three years ago, and I’m afraid he’s passing me up.”

John Kingston John Kingston has served on the Mission Committee for the past two years and has been the chairman since January. “My good friend Dr. Cottingham asked me if I wanted to be a member, to which I happily agreed.”

John was no stranger to Presbyterian Manor, though. He had a connection to the campus through his mother, Betty Kingston.

“After losing my father, my Mom suffered a stroke while living in North Carolina. We moved her to our home in Rolla. After consulting with her caregivers and doctor, they suggested that she would need additional care. We inquired about communities in Rolla and chose Presbyterian Manor. Initially, she lived in independent living and as her condition worsened, she was transferred to additional care.

Betty was quite content [here], and we were pleased with the care she received. She passed away after about two years, and happily joined my father.”

For individuals interested in learning more about Presbyterian Manor, John would share that “Presbyterian Manor offers a nurturing environment, camaraderie and affordable levels of care for our loved ones. I believe Presbyterian Manor offers our senior citizens a pleasant,

John Kingston nurturing and medically supportive environment in the twilight of their life as they transition from home care to gradients of medical care.”

John has other passions outside of PMMA. He is a golfer at Oak Meadow Country Club, a member of their board of directors and a gardener.

He is “essentially retired” from a career that included managing manufacturing facilities for three companies over the years and owning a floral company that distributed flowers and greens to approximately 30 regional florists.

When he’s not golfing or tending to his garden, John works as a bus driver for Rolla Public Schools.

John and his wife Laura recently celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary. They have two grown children and seven grandchildren. ◆

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ROLLA Presbyterian Manor

573-364-7336 ◆ Fax: 573-364-7495 1200 Homelife Plaza Rolla, MO 65401-2595 RollaPresbyterianManor.org

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COMMUNITY MATTERS | July 2019

Community Matters

is published monthly for residents and friends of Rolla Presbyterian Manor

by Presbyterian Manors of Mid-America, Inc., a not-for-profit 501(c)(3) organizaton.

To submit or suggest articles: lfreeland@PMMA.org Ann Caudill, executive director Joelle Freeland, marketing director

OUR MISSION: To provide quality senior services guided by Christian values.

Love for cats connects mother and daughter

By Christine Schoenwald for Next Avenue

Why is it, no matter how old we are, where I’d missed the there’s a part of us which continues mark. to seek our parent’s approval?

She didn’t seem to understand that My mother never was the kind of parent who believed that everything my experience with my father was different from hers her child did was extraordinary or or that I was entitled to my own brilliant. A couple of years ago, I opinion. She used words like wrote a personal essay about my “terrible,” “poorly written” and late father and his fantastic sense “bad.” of humor. I thought my mother would enjoy reading it—they had Respect for my work been divorced several years at the Afterward, I made a promise that time of his death, but she always I would never put myself into such appreciated how funny he was. a vulnerable position with my However, not only did my mother mother again and that I’d avoid not like the piece, she felt she owed sharing my written work with her. it to me to point out all the places Since my mother has never owned

a computer, cell phone or any kind of electronic device and I write mostly for online publications, it wasn’t difficult to prevent her from finding and reading my writing.

The magic of Yoshi My mother is caring towards some mammals, though: her many pets.

My mother has made no secret of how she prefers animals to humans.

And it’s the care she takes of her - Cats, continued on page 4

In Presbyterian Manor’s ongoing commitment to customer satisfaction, we have partnered with Pinnacle Quality Insight. This company will periodically contact the people we serve via telephone to conduct an interview regarding their impression of our service. We use this feedback as a tool to continually improve our quality of care and enhance our relationships.

When you are contacted to participate in the survey, they will always identify themselves specifically as being with Pinnacle Quality Insight. All state and federal confidentiality laws are met in Pinnacle’s service.

We greatly value your opinions and encourage you to be frank and honest when contacted.

Thank you in advance for your participation.

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by Christian values Like us on Facebook to stay updated on news and events.

- Cats, continued from page 3

pets that keeps her going. The love of cats is one of the few things we have in common. When an essay about my elderly cat, Yoshi was published, I debated sharing it with my mother. In the end, I relented and sent her a copy.

to answer it. In my waffling, I accidentally did and immediately heard: “The Yoshi article was wonderful! It’s smart and it gives good advice,” she said. “I’ve always told you that you should write about cats.”

When I saw my mother’s name pop up on my phone, I was afraid

Was this my mother?! She not only liked my essay; she loved it.

The Yoshi essay helped get me something that I’d been seeking

-Chaplain, continued from page 1

a lifetime.

past really is the past. Retrieving lost wealth and health is impossible.

In time, you may rebuild wealth and recover your health. These require you to keep moving forward. Learn the lessons that the past teaches and forget your failures and mistakes.

One day should not negatively alter

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COMMUNITY MATTERS | July 2019

Certain days stand out in our memories. Big events like the death of a loved one, a sudden large loss of property or a major embarrassment can affect a person for a long time. In the pop song, “Bad Day,” one line says, “Sometimes … the whole thing turns out wrong.” Technically, you

for most of my life: my mother’s respect and approval. She’s no longer my harshest critic, but my biggest fan—as long as I write about animals.

We’re closer now then we’ve been in a long time, and much of the credit for the improvement in our relationship goes to the cat who is trying to sleep on the computer keyboard as I write this: Yoshi. ◆ cannot forget a bad day. You can forget the depth of the pain or disappointment. Living a life based on “what might have been” is a recipe for unhappiness. Listen to the wisdom, born from enduring many bad days, of the Apostle Paul, “But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead.” (Philippians 3:13b, NIV).◆