Commun ty Matters Parsons Presbyterian Manor
Sending ‘Angels’ to the Good Samaritan Program
Special angels will soon be adorning Christmas trees and holiday displays at every Presbyterian Manors of MidAmerica (PMMA) senior living community.
The “angels” are paper ornaments that will arrive throughout the holiday season along with gifts to the annual Christmas Angel Appeal, which raises funds for the Good Samaritan Program for Benevolent Care. Donors who make gifts are asked to return paper Angel ornaments along with their gifts. The ornaments pay tribute to donors’ family members or friends and are displayed at PMMA communities designated by the donors. During the past two years, donors to the angel appeals have given more than $90,000 to the Good Samaritan Program. The program assists PMMA residents who have out-lived their financial resources through no fault of their own. Since PMMA began 66 years ago, no residents have been asked to leave because they exhausted their financial resources. If you would like to participate in the Angel Appeal, please email Development@pmma.org or call 800-336-8511.
How to visit your aging parent
November 2015
the right way
By Emily Gurnon for Next Avenue Katherine Arnup, a retired professor at Carleton University in Ottawa, Canada, and now life coach, got an education in caregiving when her sister and parents got sick. She later became a hospice volunteer. Thinkstock photo She drew on those experiences for her latest book, “I Don’t Have Time for This!: A Compassionate Guide to Caring forYour Aging Parents andYourself.” The following is excerpted from one of the book’s chapters. Settle in, look around
When you arrive to visit your parents, take the time to get settled. It might help to take a few deep intentional breaths before you open the door to their house or apartment. Once inside, resist the urge to start blathering. Listen. Observe. How does the house or apartment look? What changes do you notice since your last visit? Is your father wearing clothes with obvious stains? What might this mean? Is it typical? Might it be a hazard? Not your house
Because of our discomfort, we often fall into the habit of cleaning up or throwing things out that we consider to be garbage. These actions are likely to cause unnecessary frustration. They know where everything is now, and you’re only disrupting that order. Silence is OK
It’s fine if you both sit in silence for a while. Nothing bad will happen. Chances are your parent enjoys just having you there, even if he doesn’t seem to notice or drops off to sleep. (Yes, this used to drive me wild!) Bring a book to read or a pad of paper to make lists. Stop multi-tasking
Our brains, it seems, are not equipped to do more than one thing at a time, especially if focus is required. The good news is that being with aging parents demands that we slow down.
the right way continued on page 3
Leave a legacy
W. Wayne Mason, Chaplain, Harry Hynes Memorial Hospice I recently attended a memorial service for a man who lacked formal education, never married or had children, and had accumulated no financial wealth. During that service, I heard speaker after speaker telling about this man’s influence upon their lives. Tears welled up as I heard the touching stories of how this man had served others and encouraged them to find joy in life. His legacy was sound and rich, and he left it with everyone he met. That legacy included the ability to work
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hard (2 Thessalonians 3:10). He would show up at work early and stay late. He gave his very best effort each minute he was there.
One thing you knew, if he gave you his word that he would do something, then he would do his best to fulfill it (Matthew 5:37). When he said, “Yes,” he meant it, and you could depend upon it. I wish that I found that more often in our world. His high moral and ethical standards came out of his Christian faith. His love for God (Matthew 22:36-38) was why he lived the way he did. It wasn’t just a Sunday morning faith, but he had a faith which infiltrated every part of
every day. His love for God was a part of all the service he provided for people and his community (Matthew 22:39-40). He didn’t care how menial the chore might be; if he could help someone else, then he was willing to do it.
As I listened to his legacy, I wondered about my own. What kind of riches will I leave behind? Will I leave behind the greatest gifts which will change lives?
Prayer: Lord, move me to become a living reminder of your presence. When I encounter others, may they remember that you and someone who dearly loves you have been present.
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Centenarian Club
Community Matters is published monthly for residents and friends of Parsons Presbyterian Manor by Presbyterian Manors of
501(c)(3) organization. Learn more at PresbyterianManors.org. Maegen Pegues, executive director Sharla Hopper, marketing director To submit or suggest articles for this publication, contact shopper@pmma.org.
Joan- 104
Telephone: 620-421-1450 Fax: 620-421-1897 Address: 3501 Dirr Ave., Parsons, KS 67357-2220 Our mission: We provide quality senior services guided by Christian values. ParsonsPresbyterianManor.org
Laura P. - 100 2 COMMUNITY MATTERS NOVEMBER 2015
National Centenarian Day was September 22, and we’ve got a few of our own to celebrate!
Laura G.- 104
Doris -100
Meet your team: Roy Caven
Housekeeping/Laundry Services Supervisor When did you join the Manor staff? November 2014, as floor technician/housekeeping When did you start your new position? July 2015 Where did you work prior to Roy Craven, a friendly joining the local Manor? Eastman face at Parsons Presbyterian Manor Chemical Company, 25 years, Vacuum Technician Supervisor List any other professional positions you’ve held in your adult life: Promenade Hospital Southport England, 10 years, boiler man Royal Navy United Kingdom, 12 years, Leading Marine Engineering Mechanic Education: Royal Naval NAMET (Naval [NA] Mathematics and English Test)
. . . the right way continued from page 1 No drive-by visits
I knew that my father always took some time to get comfortable with my presence before he would tell the stories he had saved up for me. Because his life moved at a pace much slower than mine, he found the process of my coming and going required an adjustment that was hardly worth the effort if I just raced in and out. Find ways to engage
Whether it’s because of poor hearing, weak eyesight, cognitive damage, or other health issues, elderly parents move more slowly. If you are to have enjoyable and meaningful visits with your parents, you need to dial it back to their speed. Find ways to engage with your parents. Perhaps you could watch a television show or a DVD together. If you can bring yourself to pay attention, you might even enjoy yourself!
Art is Ageless® winners share teacher in common
How do you know the mark of a good teacher? Student achievement, of course. Joan Allen of Chetopa is a familiar face in the southeast Kansas art scene, and for good reason. She’s been producing art and teaching at Labette Community College for many years. Now, she has reason for even more notoriety.
media entry from Lyn Kirk will be featured on a greeting card, as will the painting “I’m late for a very important date” from Janice Miller.
Joan certainly knows how to identify and strengthen artistic talent, as is evident through her students’ achievements. Patricia Ringle’s drawing of Emmett Kelly, “The Tramp,” will appear in the 2016 Art is Ageless calendar. “Master Painter Clowning Around,” a mixed
and are planning to celebrate the winners’ accomplishments.
“Well, gosh I’m just so proud of them. I’m so glad they enjoy art and want to show others what “Three of my students were winners in ® they can do,” said the recent Art is Ageless competition, Joan. “I feel like just and I couldn’t be more thrilled,” said because we’re older Joan. “I entered the contest, and got second, which is kind of funny. As my kids folks doesn’t mean we don’t have talent. said, ‘Mom you better get with it!’ But We need to use and explore these talents.” I’m just so happy for them. I think it’s wonderful.” Joan and her students have class weekly, “It was like a party when they won.We are celebrating by going to an art gallery in Joplin [Mo.] and will also go to the Stone House in Fredonia, as I have students exhibiting there. It’s important to
get out and see what everyone else is doing, and a lot of people won’t go unless we get together. It’s more fun when we all go together. It’s a learning experience.” The Art is Ageless program includes art classes, musical and dramatic events, educational opportunities and current events discussions on PMMA campuses throughout the year.To be eligible for PMMA’s masterpiece level competition, artists entered a juried competition at one of 18 Presbyterian Manor communities in Kansas and Missouri.The 2016 Art is Ageless calendar and notecard artwork will include amateur and professional entries selected from winning entries in nine categories. For more information about Art is Ageless, visit www.ArtIsAgeless.org.
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The January issue of Community Matters will focus on new beginnings. Do you have a story about a time you decided to start anew? What happened? How did that alter the course of your life? Contact Sharla Hopper, marketing director, and your story may be selected for inclusion an upcoming issue of Community Matters.
What changes have you made in your life?