Clay Center Presbyterian Manor
The 4 things that matter most late in life JUNE 2019
Delicious Dinner for a good cause On April 24th we had our annual banquet, “Pasta with a Purpose.” It was an evening filled with family, friends, food and fellowship all while raising awareness and funding for a great cause, the Good Samaritan Program. Guests enjoyed a meal of spaghetti and meatballs, fettuccini alfredo, salad, breadsticks, and choice of cheesecakes topped with fresh berries or chocolate, all of which were homemade by Liz Ravencamp, dining services director. There was a silent auction, raffle drawings, a 50/50 cash drawing and a free will donation for the meal resulting in nearly $5,000 raised. Proceeds support the Good Samaritan Program, which provides help to seniors who have outlived their financial resources through no fault of their own. Special thanks to Slagle Studio for providing the entertainment! u See more photos on page 2
By Poul-Erik Tindbaek
When I was asked to contribute to an international survey on “What is most important for well-being in later life?” my first response was: Oh, I can easily come up with an answer to that question. A few seconds after I said yes, I realized that I shouldn’t come up with what matters most to me for a good life in my third age (the healthy years after work, but before fragility and disease set in). I should offer what I think are most important to all people after age 60. I realize that some arrive at the third age with a sense that it is something new and quite different for them. Others are dumped unprepared, perhaps seduced by the sweet story that the next 20 to 25 years will be a long vacation. However, for most, it is apparent that, at the transition to the new phase of life, there are more barriers and difficulties than expected. The transition from a long working life to the third age is a solo event and perhaps the most difficult change in adulthood. Here are the four things I believe matter most in later life:
1. Understanding that 60+ is a new beginning Lives are perceived in our culture as a downward spiral. This doesn’t make it easy for new retirees to see their own story as a new beginning. But when new roles like being a Staff from all areas lent a hand helping in the kitchen. – continued on page 3 Clay Center Presbyterian Manor | A PMMA COMMUNITY
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Pasta with a Purpose
Members from our Mission Council, Preston Rook and Randy Carlson, and State Representative Susan Carlson serve up spaghetti.
Guests were greeted by friendly staff at the front sign-in table.
A couple of our favorite volunteers, James Cole and Dorothy Turner, were happy to help!
Many of our residents enjoyed Pasta with a Purpose!
Executive Director Christian Gilbert was all smiles at our Pasta for a Purpose fundraiser!
The Slagle Studio Dancers/Twirlers provided delightful entertainment! Like us on Facebook to stay updated on news and events.
CLAY CENTER Presbyterian Manor
785-632-5646 u Fax: 785-632-5874 924 Eighth St. Clay Center, KS 67432-2620 ClayCenterPresbyterianManor.org
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COMMUNITY MATTERS | June 2019
Community Matters is published monthly for residents and friends of Clay Center Presbyterian Manor by Presbyterian Manors of Mid-America, Inc., a not-for-profit 501(c)(3) organizaton.
To submit or suggest articles: clrice@PMMA.org Christian Gilbert, executive director Christi Rice, marketing director
OUR MISSION: To provide quality senior services guided by Christian values.
grandparent pop up, you can talk about a new phase of life. Thirty years ago, English historian Peter Laslett described the third age as the “culmination of life, where the individual can deliver the most important contributions.” To find well-being in later life, it is therefore important to spot the starting line of the new beginning and give yourself a time to think of the new purposes in life. It is my impression that few people allow themselves the time to find a compass for their own direction and purpose in life in the third age.
2. Adding more good years For a good life in the third age, you’ll want to keep healthy physically and mentally as long as possible and try to shorten the fourth age with its fragility and disease. It is not always easy to change health habits, of course. But keep in mind what Apple’s co-founder Steve Jobs said after he had cancer: “Death is the change agent of life.” Similar views are often heard from people who, in a late-age, manage to change their lifestyle by altering their dietary and exercise habits. Several years ago, the fitness chains began claiming hat the morning hours were close to sold out to a new target audience: people 60+. Not only in the training rooms, but also around the coffee machines. Maybe just half an hour of coffee talk is just as important for several good years in the third age as an hour of high pulse in the fitness room. It’s equally crucial to work on mental health habits— with good social
relationships, a positive view of life and daily brain challenges. In a recent U.S. study, Brigham Young University professor Julianne Holt-Lundstad concluded that “loneliness can ultimately result in a far earlier mortality, and loneliness and social isolation may represent a greater public health hazard than obesity.” We know that the highest suicide rate is found among older men who are alone and lonely.
3. Doing something you’re good at and meaningful to you Some people in their third age have already found their passion and are in full swing with a hobby. Perhaps they’re caring for a garden. Gardening, both literally and transposed, is the French’s overall perception of the good life after working life: ‘Il faut cultiver son jardin.’ It may be harder than expected to find activities they are good at and make them happy. It is not so straightforward for everyone after 30 to 40 years of work to find out possibilities for where to develop their talents, use their experience and feel that they’re needed and can still make a difference. One of the problems with the transition from a long working life is that you only look forward to all that you get (vacation and freedom to do what you want) and forget to look back on all that you lose. The great challenge is figuring out how to recover some of what you’ve lost — and the ability to do something you’re good at — and combine it with newfound freedom you. You might spend a day with this exercise: Ask yourself: What did I do
Photo: Adobe
4 things – continued from page 1
when I was the best? Start thinking about your whole life and try to list 10 situations where you’ve been really good. Then try to look a bit closer at four or five of your listed memories, where you were most involved and engaged. Determine in a little more detail why they worked so well. These explanations are key factors to outline what you would like to transfer to your life in the third ag.
4. Doing something good for others One of the reasons why the third age not only offers a good life but can become the “culmination of life” is described by Jonathan Rauch in his recently published book, The Happiness Curve: Why Life Becomes Better After 50. In continuation of psychologists’ long-standing research about the U-shaped happiness curve (where young and older feel relatively happier than middle-agers), Rauch concluded that during the aging process we are largely moving away from individual competition and ambition and towards good social relations and care for others. Psychologist Erik Erikson described the movement and psychological development that takes place over – continued on page 4
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CLAY CENTER Presbyterian Manor 924 Eighth St. Clay Center, KS 67432-2620
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4 things – continued from page 3 the years as “generativity.” That means an ability that develops with age to exceed personal interests and care for both younger and older generations. Many who arrive at later life believe the time has come to give something back from all they’ve gained and experienced. To find the way to a long and good life in the third age, it is important to fill your life with activities that give you personal satisfaction. For many, however, there’s extra satisfaction knowing that you’re still needed and that all the experience and know-how you’ve gained through life can still be used to provide value for others.u
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COMMUNITY MATTERS | June 2019
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