Beauty Through Ashes - Book

Page 1


Beauty through Ashes

The continued journey

2022 - 2025

As a woman and single mother of two daughters, I have been privileged to know, wonder, and experience people in diverse settings of creativity, life, and leadership. I have lived through and beyond abuse and trauma. I embody faith-based pedagogy, engaging with material exploration to find and investigate hope, joy, and meaning. I am interested in the intersections and convergence of time, trauma, and memory, as I honour the joy of living and giving.

The works within this book explore this deep history, using the abstraction of form and concept to decontextualize and recontextualize my lived story. These process works express the compression of lived experience over time. Collected images, files, objects, and corresponding memories from lands and peoples have been recollected, categorized, and reduced or transmuted into ash and crushed powders – as they take on new material forms within and upon two and three-dimensional objects.

Fueled by oxygen and substance, fire consumes, transmutes, and repositions history to posit a renewed voicing of infinite connection and correlation to finite forms consumed and reduced to the signature materiality of ash. In one’s lived experiences, heat from the fire of life may sterilize the evidence of history. It can be more than a soul can bear, yet if we endure, the fire burns off the old, renewing us to begin again.

Gathered Elements

Wisdom gathers within our lived experiences, like elements assembled within a periodic table, identifying the science of living within our earth shell, as materiality gathers within the soul of our being and the sole of our shoes. Collected mementos like pottery shards, branches, or coral gifted by the earth are elemental moments that anchor. Seed pods, glass, and dried wood are mnemonic connections from the earth. These objects, ground into powders, infuse collected ash with expressive life stories across time in new forms.

Gathered Elements

ReMembering

Fire, charcoal, heavy gel, gel medium, charcoal dust, and glazing medium on wood panel 36” x 1.5”

This work has no north, south, east, or west. It is a circle, whole and undivided, with no supreme position. It is a circle with no dominant position. As we walk on into our collective future, we can shift from one over another to one with each other. Unlearning has been about recollecting understanding, reflecting, and reminding myself that I can become a different soul. I can be remembered in the community in a new way. I want to be part of a community table of remembering wherein each one lays themselves alongside another, and collectively, we create a place of abiding where the absence of one part of the assemblage would be a loss to the collective work of humanity – hence, remembering. *It was a conversation with my friend Patricia Dewit that inspired this work.

Breathe

Ash, crushed red roof tile, dried lavender, pouring medium, fixative on round birch panel with a rough aluminum edge 36”x1”

As I learn about lands and peoples, I am learning models of human interaction that cherish life in others. This artwork reminds me of the stories of those I have met. Created from travelogue ash, Bahamian clay roofing tiles from a time past are now trodden underfoot by present-day travelers. Ground tile, disempowered, is joined with hydrangea, lavender, and bird of paradise as a testament of renewal. I can feel the fresh breeze move through my being as I am reminded of the privilege of unlearning and learning anew through the stories of life and the proximal connections across the chronological time we have the privilege of living.

Making Space

Community, charcoal chunks, charcoal powder and glazing medium on wood panel 48”x1.5”

This Making Space artwork unfolds as part of remembering within these Beauty through Ash works. This work was created within two collaborative activations. Everyone was invited to select their piece of charcoal and remember themselves upon this wood panel. First, an ever-evolving group of participants sat on the ground in a circle around the substrate. Participants conversed for more than two hours, and many stayed to assist me in cleaning up and carrying this 48-inch panel to my vehicle to dry. It was rereleased for finishing to the OCADU Mature Student Collective. We gathered in an eating area and placed the final pieces of charcoal in their homes while we shared stories, memories, and conversations, as we remembered ourselves into this completed form.

Domestic

Ash, pouring medium, fixative, gold leaf, 36” Circle x 1.5”

I consider this a domestic ‘ashet’ —a blessing from the reality and limitations of third-party assistance in the journey through domestic abuse. This artwork is an exchange in which I traded my historic “two feet on the ground” reality for this ethereal velveteen galactic image that hearts yearn to touch. Beauty Through Ash—Indeed. There are parts of life we cannot go to; we must go through. Domestic abuse is one of those realities. While unfortunate to have to navigate, in doing so, in gathering the ash of life experience in this form of sorrow, we renew with greater strength after than we did before – if we keep walking. Some of us may walk with a recognizable hitch to our gate, yet we have stability and strength in renewal.

Vessel of Honour

Recycled cardboard shipping forms for a coffee maker, art and business ash, beeswax-coated interior

Irregular – approx. 24” x 16”

There are multitudes of people who care for and nurture the gifts within those they meet, the gifts we are to one another. For some, I am a part of the vessel that supports the glory of God in their lives, yet many times, I am the one being supported, nurtured, and released to be a blessing to others. This vessel represents the humble nature of the fiber of our lives woven together and pressed into service. Common recyclable packaging for coffee makers or vacuums is repurposed here. It is deconstructed and reconfigured as a vessel of honour coated on the outside walls in art and business ash within the grey encaustic medium. The interior is covered with fragrant beeswax, as a celebration of community and beauty.

Bowels of Mercy

Recycled cardboard shipping forms, art and business ash, beeswax, damar varnish, gold leaf Irregular – approx. 24”x24”

Created from two crossed forms of recycled fibre, this bowl represents the intersection of Divinity and humanity as a metaphor of mercy through the cross of Christ. The title, Bowels of Mercy, emerged while creating, as I re-collected the phrase from bowels—of my memory. This bowl speaks to our inward parts--the heart, the seat of the feelings.

“So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, allpurpose garment. Never be without it.” Colossians 3:12-14, The Message

Redemption

Recycled cardboard shipping forms for a vacuum cleaner, art, and business ash, beeswax, damar varnish, gold leaf, scarlet oil paint. Irregular – approx. 9” x 9”

This fragile bowl, comprised of building ash, beeswax, and recycled paper, sealed inside with scarlet oil-infused damar varnish with a rubbed gold leaf finish, reflects the fragility of redemption in our lives and the Glory of God released in each of us. Our faith perspectives may vary, so I am grateful for your willingness to engage with this piece and what it might mean for you. Redemption resonates universally, whether through circumstances or actions. Within my faith, I find God’s Grace redemptive to my selfcenteredness, enabling me to love fully. For me, “…there’s no such thing as self-rescue, pulling [my]self up by your bootstraps. The cost of rescue is beyond our means, and even then it doesn’t guarantee Life forever, or insurance…” (Psalm 49:7-9, The Message)

Ash Bowl

Recycled paper mixed with ash set apart for Ash Wednesday, combined with recycled music sheets, beeswax, damar varnish, and gold leaf. Irregular – approx. 5”x6”.

This object is created from recycled paper mixed with ash set apart for Ash Wednesday services in the Anglican tradition. It is combined with recycled music sheets, beeswax, damar varnish, and gold leaf. I asked a minister colleague what it might cost to receive some of the church’s sacred ash, set aside for those upcoming Ash Wednesday services. The next time we met she handed me a bag with ashes in it, at no charge. I was thankful for the heart of this leader, who did not charge an artist who wanted to create beauty with ash set apart for sacred use. In return, I gifted what I created back to this priest for use in the church, as I was taken by the generosity of her heart, which also reflects the generosity of the Father’s heart for artists.

A Feather on the Breath of God

Beeswax, polycrystalline wax, ash on board 6”x12”

Inspired by the words of Hildegard of Bingen, a 12thcentury mystic, abbess, and writer.

“Listen; there was once a king on his throne anointed with great honour. He sent forth his dove into the world, which dropped the tiniest feather from its wing. The king raised the feather, blew on it, and commanded it to fly. The feather flew, not because of anything in itself, but because the air bore it along. Thus am I: but a feather on the breath of God.” ~ Hildegard of Bingen (1098 – 1179).

This writing captured my imagination. Applying and then removing a gold-leaf-covered feather to a substrate comprised of beeswax drops of varying depth left the feather’s essence or breath within this created form.

Yesterday's News

Polycrystalline wax, ash, gold powder, an old sunflower painting on board 12”x12”

Yesterday’s News - Literally.

When we walk through life, we have boxes of yesterday’s news. Happenings and recognitions from a life well lived. While the old news is part of our story, it is yesterday’s notes on life. If we have the privilege of living beyond those decades, we need to release new headlines that capture and express the language and effort that marks these decades with the goodness of God in the land of the living. This encaustic rendering is based on yesterday’s newspapers atop an encaustic rendering of a sunflower created on top of a carved sunflower for woodblock printing. Varying art expressions were saved across time, merging into this renewed reminder of beauty from yesterday’s news.

Triple Ash Source

Ash, encaustic, powdered pigment on Lexan 12”x30”x1.5”

Expeditions require understanding the terrain one wishes to travel upon or through. Exploring Terra Ferma through the fire, ash, grinding, stabilizers, and finished artworks amidst historical figures and blessings of time past, released and set in time present. This work is an ash experiment with Lexan as the substrate, pouring medium, rigid tubing, non-aerosol fixatives, and encaustic and powdered pigments assembled using molds and a heat gun. Like life, we are reshaped through living and circumstances, landing in beauty. The pouring medium held its edge until disturbed by the ash’s weight when it needed a new boundary. The heat gun worked with encaustic and powdered pigments, yet the heat reshaped its final boundary. Humans also reflect a transformative journey to renewed beauty amidst a few boundary resets along the way.

Catching Ash | The Edge of Grief

Fire, Ash, Gold Leaf on Wood Panel

20”x48”x1.5”

When we experience loss, we experience the heat of the fire. A consumptive process that reduces all we were before to ash through the raging fire. The burn marks show in our being, alongside the beauty of the refined gold of our existence that is now visible to all. Yet the beauty of our lives is not obliterated by fire and ash. Upon reflection, we may notice pockets of our being wherein a residue of ash is caught and hangs on longer than other areas of our existence. These fragments of the journey remind us of where we have come from as they have caught the ash on the edge of our grief. A picture of remains when people live through circumstances that could be unto destruction, yet become reconstruction serving as a remembrance of grace within life.

Context

Recycled rubber metal fabrication template, crushed lavender, crushed charcoal, ground Turks and Caicos sea fan, gold leaf 30”x48”x1.5”

I first titled this piece The Bully in My Backyard, which gave it too much power to history. Conquering what has conquered us, we place it appropriately amid boundaries wherein we can enjoy reflecting on our lived history. What historically consumed every moment, thought, and breath will no longer be front and centre in our story, moving beyond the limitations that marked our being for a season. It is akin to visiting a glacier in 1970 and looking at the same glacier now. We have joy in the present view while recognizing loss over time. Decontextualizing what was our undoing and recontextualizing it anew is bittersweet. The historic is not gone – it is re-contextualized into a composition we enjoy. Hence – this could be called Context is Everything.

“Light a candle in my darkness tonight… that I might see tomorrow dawn…”

This cry from my heart, written in a journal many years ago, has come back to guide and lead me through the journey of being made new…

For me, there is always beauty in brokenness, whether the recognition of an unknown story in a triangular piece of a plate found in a fence bottom or along a sea edge. Coaxing ash to land upon varying substrates of my choosing or mixing ash with land elements from varying contexts in search of beauty, is the most difficult artwork I have ever completed. While challenging, it has been, and still is, a playful journey that brings me joy. Like the text below, I have received bouquets of roses for ashes and a praising heart for a languid spirit. Life is hard and beautiful, and I would not trade the beauty I have found while living through ash. I hope these works inspire you to enjoy the grace and grit of living through ash to get to your beauty.

“God sent me to announce the year of his grace— …to comfort all who mourn, To care for the needs of all who mourn in [the parched place], give them bouquets of roses instead of ashes, Messages of joy instead of news of doom, a praising heart instead of a languid spirit.

Rename them “Oaks of Righteousness” planted by God to display his glory” Isaiah 61:2,3 – The Message Bible +1 (905) - 259 - 3462 pbk@sympatico.ca

Turn static files into dynamic content formats.

Create a flipbook
Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.