As a woman and single mother of two daughters, I have known wonder and experienced people in diverse expressions of creativity, life, and leadership. I have lived through and beyond abuse and trauma. Embodying a faith-based pedagogy, I engage in material exploration to find and investigate hope, joy, and meaning. Interested in the intersections and convergence of time, trauma, and memory, I honour the joy of living and giving.
The works within this book explore this deep history, using the abstraction of form and concept to decontextualize and recontextualize my lived story.
These process works express the compression of lived experience over time. Collected images, files, objects, and corresponding memories from lands and peoples have been recollected, categorized, and reduced or transmuted into ash and crushed powders – before they take on new material forms as two and three-dimensional objects.
Memory Sources
Perceptions | Gathered Objects | Collected time
Memory serves as the material foundation in this body of work, enabling the exploration of history through mnemonic discoveries. These discoveries arise from contextualized, decontextualized, and recontextualized objects within the space-time continuum
Memory becomes substantive when reconnected with historic files and objects. Sorted, named, and classified as evidence of a life lived, they are transformed as the materiality of life is repositioned through fire and destruction. Documents move from ‘proof of existence’ into unfamiliar forms for re ective expression—still to come—yet with reduced weight and presence. Fire changes everything into its likeness. History is retained in memory along with coloured, tinted piles of residual ash.
Re ected history, teased apart, observed, categorized, transmuted, and repositioned through fire and recollection.
Fueled by oxygen and substance, fire consumes, transmutes, and repositions history to posit a renewed voicing of infinite connection and correlation to finite forms, consumed and reduced to the signature materiality of ash. In one’s lived experiences, heat from the fire of life may sterilize the evidence of history. It can be more than a soul can bear, yet if we endure, the fire burns away the old, renewing us to begin again.
Gathered Elements
Wisdom gathers within our lived experiences, like elements assembled in a periodic table, identifying the science of living within our earthly shell, as materiality collects within the soul of our being and the sole of our shoes. Collected mementos, such as pottery shards, branches, or coral gifted by the earth, are elemental moments that anchor us. Seed pods, glass, and dried wood form mnemonic connections with the planet. These objects, ground into powders, infuse collected ash with expressive life stories across time in new forms.
Gathered Elements
Remembering
Fire, charcoal, heavy gel, gel medium, charcoal dust, and glazing medium on wood panel 36” x 1.5”
This work has no north, south, east, or west. It is a circle—whole and undivided—with no supreme or dominant position. As we walk into our collective future, we can shift from striving as one over another to one with each other. This season of unlearning has been about recollecting understanding, re ecting, and reminding myself that I can become a di erent soul. I can be remembered into the community in a new way. I want to be part of a community table of remembering, where each person lays themselves alongside another, and together, we create a place of abiding wherein the absence of one part of the assemblage would be a loss to the collective work of humanity—hence, remembering. It was a conversation with my friend Patricia Dewit that inspired this work.
Breathe
Ash, crushed red roof tile, dried lavender, pouring medium, and fixative on round birch panel with a rough aluminum edge 36”x1”
As I learn about lands and peoples, I am learning models of human interaction that cherish life in others. This artwork reminds me of the stories of those I have met. Created from travelogue ash, Bahamian clay roofing tiles from a time past are now trodden underfoot by present-day travelers. Ground into dust, these tiles are disempowered. Joined with hydrangea, lavender, and bird-of-paradise, they become a testament to renewal. I can feel the fresh breeze move through my being as I am reminded of the privilege of unlearning and learning anew through the stories of life and the proximal connections across the chronological time we have the privilege of living.
Making Space
Community, charcoal chunks, charcoal powder, and glazing medium on wood panel 48”x1.5”
Making Space unfolded as part of a community remembering with colleagues, as part of two collaborative activations. Each person was invited to select a piece of charcoal and add it to the wood panel, thereby remembering themselves upon the wood panel. The first, an ever-evolving group of participants, sat on the ground in a circle around the substrate. Contributors added their piece and remained, conversing for two hours, experiencing community around this circle. It was re-released for finishing by the OCADU Mature Student Collective. We gathered in an eating area and placed the final pieces of charcoal in their homes on the wood while we shared stories, memories, and conversations as we remembered ourselves into this completed form.
Domestic
Ash, pouring medium, fixative, gold leaf, 36” Circle x 1.5”
I consider this a domestic ‘ashet’—a blessing from the reality and limitations of third-party assistance in the journey through domestic abuse. This artwork is an exchange in which I traded my historic “two feet on the ground” reality for this ethereal velveteen galactic image that hearts yearn to touch. Beauty Through Ash—indeed. There are parts of life we cannot go to; we must go through. Domestic abuse is one of those realities. While it is unfortunate to have to navigate, in doing so—by gathering the ash of life experience in this form of sorrow—we renew with greater strength afterward than we had before, if we keep walking. Some of us may walk with a recognizable hitch in our gait, yet we have stability and strength in renewal.
Vessel of Honour
Recycled cardboard shipping forms for a co ee maker, art and business ash, beeswax-coated interior
Irregular – approx. 24” x 16”
There are multitudes of people who care for and nurture the gifts within those they meet—the gifts we are to one another. For some, I am a part of the vessel that supports the glory of God in their lives. Yet many times, I am the one being supported, nurtured, and released to be a blessing to others. This vessel represents the humble essence of the fibre of our lives, woven together and pressed into service. Common recyclable packaging for co ee makers or vacuums is repurposed here— deconstructed and reconfigured as a vessel of honour. The coated outside walls are composed of art and business files reduced to ash, serving as the colourant for the grey encaustic medium. The interior is covered with fragrant beeswax as a celebration of community and beauty.
Bowels of Mercy
Recycled cardboard shipping forms, art and business ash, beeswax, damar varnish, gold leaf
Irregular – approx. 24”x24”
Created from two crossed forms of recycled fibre, this bowl represents the intersection of Divinity and humanity as a metaphor of mercy through the cross of Christ. The title, Bowels of Mercy, emerged while creating, as I recollected the phrase from the bowels of my memory. This bowl speaks to our inward parts—the heart, the seat of the feelings. Colossians 3:12-14 in the King James Version, is the text that came to mind while I was creating:
“Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsu ering; Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another...as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. And above all these things put on charity...”.
Redemption
Recycled cardboard shipping forms from a vacuum cleaner, art and business ash, beeswax, damar varnish, gold leaf, scarlet oil paint. Irregular – approx. 9” x 9”
This fragile bowl, comprised of building ash, beeswax, and recycled paper, sealed inside with scarlet oil-infused damar varnish with a rubbed gold leaf finish, re ects the fragility of redemption in our lives and the Glory of God released in each of us. Our faith perspectives may vary, so I am grateful for your willingness to engage with this piece and what it might mean for you. Redemption resonates universally, whether through circumstances or actions. Within my faith, I find God’s Grace redemptive to my selfcenteredness, enabling me to love fully. For me, “…there’s no such thing as self-rescue, pulling [my]self up by your bootstraps. The cost of rescue is beyond our means, and even then it doesn’t guarantee Life forever, or insurance…” Psalm 49:7-9, The Message
Ash Bowl
Recycled paper mixed with ash set apart for Ash Wednesday, combined with recycled music sheets, beeswax, damar varnish, and gold leaf. Irregular – approx. 5”x6”.
This object is created from recycled paper mixed with ash set apart for Ash Wednesday services in the Anglican tradition. It is combined with recycled music sheets, beeswax, damar varnish, and gold leaf. I asked a minister colleague what it might cost to receive some of the church’s sacred ash, set aside for those upcoming Ash Wednesday services. The next time we met, she handed me a bag of ashes at no charge. I was thankful for the heart of this leader, who did not charge an artist wanting to create beauty with ash set apart for sacred use. In return, I gifted what I had created back to this priest for use in the church, as I was moved by the generosity of her heart, which also re ects the generosity of the Father’s heart for artists.
A Feather on the Breath of God
Beeswax, polycrystalline wax, and ash on board 6”x12”
Inspired by the words of Hildegard of Bingen, a 12th century mystic, abbess, and writer: “Listen; there was once a king on his throne anointed with great honour. He sent forth his dove into the world, which dropped the tiniest feather from its wing. The king raised the feather, blew on it, and commanded it to y. The feather ew, not because of anything in itself, but because the air bore it along. Thus am I: but a feather on the breath of God.” ~ Hildegard of Bingen (1098 – 1179)
This writing captured my imagination. Applying and then removing a gold-leaf-covered feather to a substrate comprised of beeswax drops of varying depth left the feather’s essence or breath within this created form.
Polycrystalline wax, ash, gold powder, and an old sun ower painting on board 12”x12”
Yesterday’s News - Literally. When we walk through life, we collect boxes of yesterday’s news: happenings and recognitions from a life well-lived. While the old news is part of our story, it is yesterday’s notes on life. If we have the privilege of living beyond those decades, we need to release new headlines that capture and express the language and e ort that mark these decades with the goodness of God in the land of the living. This encaustic rendering is based on yesterday’s newspapers atop an encaustic rendering of a sun ower, created on top of a carved sun ower for woodblock printing. Varying art expressions were saved across time, merging into this renewed reminder of beauty from yesterday’s news.
Triple Ash Source
Business, travel, and life ash, encaustic, and powdered pigment on Lexan 12”x30”x1.5”
This work explores Terra Ferma through the fire, ash, grinding, stabilizers, and finished artworks amidst both historical figures and blessings of time past. Working with Lexan as the substrate, pouring medium, rigid tubing, and non-aerosol fixatives, we assemble time past in time present through encaustic and powdered pigments using moulds and a heat gun. Like life, we are reshaped through living and circumstances, landing in beauty. The pouring medium held its edge until disturbed by the ash’s weight when it needed a new boundary. The heat gun worked with encaustic and powdered pigments, yet the heat reshaped its final boundary. Humans also re ect a transformative journey to renewed beauty amidst a few boundary resets along the way.
Catching Ash | The Edge of Grief
Fire, Ash, Gold Leaf on Wood Panel
20”x48”x1.5”
When we experience loss, we experience the heat of the fire. A consumptive process that reduces all we were before to ash through the raging fire. The burn marks show in our being, alongside the beauty of the refined gold of our existence that is now visible to all. Yet the beauty of our lives is not obliterated by fire and ash. Upon re ection, we may notice pockets of our being wherein a residue of ash is caught and hangs on longer than other areas of our existence. These fragments of the journey remind us of where we have come from, as they have caught the ash on the edge of our grief. Beauty remains, when people live through circumstances that could be unto destruction, yet become reconstruction, serving as a remembrance of grace within life.
I first titled this piece The Bully in My Backyard, which gave it too much power over history. Conquering what has conquered us, we place it appropriately amid boundaries wherein we can enjoy re ecting on our lived history. What historically consumed every moment, thought, and breath will no longer be front and centre in our story, moving beyond the limitations that marked our being for a season. It is akin to visiting a glacier in 1970 and looking at the same glacier now. We have joy in the present view while recognizing loss over time. Decontextualizing what was our undoing and recontextualizing it anew is bittersweet. The historic is not gone – it is recontextualized into a composition we enjoy. Hence – this could be called Context is Everything.
Insert text here
“Light a candle in my darkness tonight…that I might see tomorrow’s dawn…”
This cry from my heart, written in a journal many years ago, has come back to guide and lead me through the journey of being made new…
- Patty Bowman Kingsley
For me, there is always beauty in brokenness, whether the recognition of an unknown story in a piece of pottery found in a fence bottom, or along a sea edge. Coaxing ash to settle in place upon varying substrates of my choosing, or mixing ash with land elements from varying contexts in search of beauty, is the most di cult artwork I have ever completed.
While challenging, it has been, and still is, a playful journey that brings me joy. I have received bouquets of roses in the place of ashes and a celebrating heart for a languid spirit.
Life is hard and beautiful, and I would not trade the beauty I have found while living through ash. I hope these works inspire you to enjoy the grace and grit of living through ash to get to your beauty.
“God sent me to announce the year of his grace— …to comfort all who mourn, To care for the needs of all who mourn in [the parched place], give them bouquets of roses instead of ashes, messages of joy instead of news of doom, a praising heart instead of a languid spirit. Rename them “Oaks of Righteousness” planted by God to display his glory” Isaiah 61:2,3 – The Message
