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THE 2020-2021 PNC BROADWAY IN PITTSBURGH LINEUP REVEALED VOL. 3 ISSUE 7

March 31 2020 - April 6, 2020

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STAFF Publisher/Editor: Charlie Deitch Charlie@pittsburghcurrent.com Associate Publisher: Bethany Ruhe Bethany@pittsburghcurrent.com Advisory Board Chairman: Robert Malkin Robert@pittsburghcurrent.com

contents

Vol. III Iss. VIl MARCH 31, 2020

NEWS 4 | Kids Count 6 | Just Barely 7 | Tightening Up 7 | Elder Care

EDITORIAL

OPINION 8| American Exceptionalism

Art Director: Larissa Mallon Larissa@pittsburghcurrent.com

ART & ENTERTAINMENT 10 | PNC Broadway 14 | Album Reviews

Music Editor: Margaret Welsh

Food 15 | Restaurant Guide

Margaret@pittsburghcurrent.com Visuals Editor: Jake Mysliwczyk Jake@pittsburghcurrent.com

EXTRA 21 | Current Comics 22 | Savage Love 23 | Big Dirty's Pickup Truck 24 | Parting Shot

Contributing Writers: Jody DiPerna, Mike Shanley, Dan Savage, Larry Schweiger, Tom Lisi , Matt Wallenstein info@pittsburghcurrent.com Logo Design: Mark Addison ADVERTISING

Senior Account Executive: Andrea James Andrea@pittsburghcurrent.com Sales Associate: Ross Cortese Ross@pittsburghcurrent.com

CREDIT:

COVER PHOTO BY: JAKE MSLYWCZYK The Fine Print The contents of the Pittsburgh Current are © 2019 by Pittsburgh Current, LLC. All Rights Reserved. No portion of this publication shall be duplicated or reprinted without the express-written consent of Pittsburgh Current LLC. One copy per person. The Pittsburgh Current is published twice monthly beginning August 2018. The opinions contained in columns and letters to the editors represent the views of the author and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of Pittsburgh Current ownership, management and staff. The Pittsburgh Current is an independently owned and operated print and online media company produced in the heart of Pittsburgh’s Beechview neighborhood, 1665 Broadway Ave., Pittsburgh, PA., 15216. 412-204-7248. Email us or don’t: info@pittsburghcurrent.com.

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SU PPORT THE PITTSBURGH CURRENT AND THE FUTURE OF INDEPENDENT JOURNALISM

We are an influence-free, Independent alternative print and online news company in Pittsburgh Pa. As we’ve been reporting on the COVID-19 outbreak, we’ve seen firsthand the dramatic effect it’s having on businesses around southwestern Pennsylvania. This is especially true for small businesses like ours. While we remain steadfastly committed to reporting on the effects of the COVID-19 outbreak through the latest information and features, we need your help. Support independent journalism through a sustaining or one-time donation to the Pittsburgh Current. 80% of all donations go toward paying our staff and content creators, 20% will help keep the lights on. And 100 percent of it will ensure this city continues to have an alternative, independent voice. Even before canceling events and staying at home became the new normal, media companies like ours were struggling to keep things going. But we, like others, have found a way because people depend on our product, they like what they do and we feel that appreciation every day. We announced last week that we were temporarily halting our twice-monthly print publication and focusing on our online digital edition because people aren’t going outside, and the businesses where we distribute are all closed. The good news in all of this is that our digital edition will now be coming out weekly instead of bi-monthly. So beginning March 24, you’ll be able to get the Current every Tuesday (to make sure you get it delivered to your inbox, fill out our email signup on our homepage). We are a small team with a big mission and we’re stubborn enough to know that with your help we will get through this. The Current, like many small businesses, is at a crossroads. We plan on doing our part to get you the information you need to make it through this crisis, but we need your support to make sure we’re also able to report on the next one. You can donate by clicking the popup on our homepage or clicking donate below.

Donate to the Pittsburgh Current and the future of Independent Journalism Thank You,

Charlie Deitch

Publisher, Pittsburgh Current charlie@pittsburghcurrent.com

PITTSBURGH CURRENT | MARCH 31, 2020 | 3


NEWS KIDS COUNT IN THE 2020 CENSUS BY SCARLETT LIRIANO CEPIN - SPECIAL TO THE PITTSBURGH CURRENT INFO@PITTSBURGHCURRENT.COM

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ccording to the U.S. Census Bureau, in the 2010 census, parents of some 1 million children, left their kids off their households’ census form — and that was a costly mistake. “Census data is used to decide how $675 billion in federal public funding is spent every year,” said Casey Smith, communications director at the Pennsylvania Department of Community & Economic Development in Harrisburg, Pa. “The $26.8 billion Pennsylvania receives annually for its 16 largest federally-funded programs amounts to about $2,000 per Pennsylvanian each year, but that amount could change depending on our 2020 census count,” said Smith. That’s because funding decisions are based on the number of people living in each state. State governments give grants to cities and towns. The money is spent on crucial services that many kids rely on, such as school breakfast and national school lunch programs, as well as hospitals, housing, and road repair that benefit everyone, she said. In September 2018, Pennsylvania Governor Tom Wolf signed an executive order creating the Governor’s Census 2020 Complete Count Commission. Its job, said Smith, is to make sure all Pennsylvanians — no matter who they are or where they live, their citizenship status, or background — are counted once (and only once) and in the right place in the 2020 census. The commission is made up of representatives from colleges and universities, businesses, community and nonprofit organizations, religious communities, and health care organizations. Elected and appointed representatives from all levels of government work with them, too. Feyisola Akintola, who works for Pittsburgh Mayor Bill Peduto’s Office of Equity, remembers early meetings between the city, the county, and their foundation partners in which they

strategized about how to decrease the number of Pennsylvanians who were miscounted — or not counted at all. In her role as special initiatives manager, programs like Welcoming Pittsburgh help to build bridges between the city’s many cultures. She also works with the Office of Equity’s team to help residents and communities have equal access to opportunities and feel welcome. It made sense to target and educate populations that are traditionally undercounted, including people of color, immigrants, rural populations, older adults, multi-generational households, non-English speakers, children of single parents, and youth. The Complete Count Committee Education Subcommittee brainstormed how they could reach school students from high school all the way to preschool, especially because children under the age of 5 are among the most undercounted, Akintola said. They considered having a video competition. Others wondered what they could put in a kid’s backpack so they could take it home. Enter an innovative children’s book: “We Count!,” put out by a nonprofit publishing company that creates books for parents who rarely see their stories, concerns, strengths and constraints reflected in commercial publishing or media. At first glance, the book, produced by Lisa Bernstein and Dr. Faith Lamb-Parker, might seem like any other children’s counting book. But it’s much more than that. “It’s not just a children’s counting book,” said Lamb-Parker. “When ‘We Count!’ is read aloud, children learn about counting, colors, and cultures. Adults learn basic, yet essential, information about why it matters to be counted in the 2020 census.” “We Count!” was created with input from researchers across the country. But Bernstein and Lamb-Parker really learned why people were hesitant to participate in the census or were likely

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A mom with her son and Head Start Childcare provider read "We Count!," a book that teaches kids how to coun simply put media/iGeneration Youth/TNS)

to leave their children off the form by talking to parents, grandparents, and early childcare providers across Paterson, N.J. After speaking to those folks, the two understood that everyone was concerned about privacy. Many undocumented families were especially worried about sharing information on the census form, especially since many Paterson residents had been deported in

the last two years, said Bernstein. By law, the Census Bureau cannot release any information that identifies a person. “Census answers can’t be used against an individual, and the Census Bureau has a team of cybersecurity experts monitoring and protecting their technology — and your data,” Smith said. Some families leave their children off


NEWS questions about communities — like how many people live in this city? What are their ages and ethnicities? True answers to the census help everyone understand what people and communities need. If the census shows that a neighborhood has many young children, the local government can plan to open another school, change laws, or build new housing so children, like Frankie, Tomas, and Nina can live without worry. Since children aren’t able to represent themselves, it’s up to their families to recognize the value of filling out the census form as accurately as possible. The book offers a simple format that helps people understand why this is important. The City of Pittsburgh and Allegheny County ordered about 3,800 books in different languages, which they will distribute to kids and families for free. But the book is part of a nationwide campaign. So far, 500,000 books have been printed. Organizations serving hard-to-count communities can order the books at wecountkids.org. Organizations needing help to purchase the books can request help at the same site by signing up for the “gift registry” option. By sharing the book, census partners hope traditionally marginalized families nationwide recognize themselves in

both the stories and illustrations, each of which is created by an illustrator who is from the culture their art represents. And it’s available in 15 languages: English, Spanish, Bengali, Arabic, Armenian, Simplified Chinese, Traditional Chinese, Korean, Vietnamese, Farsi, Punjabi, Russian, Tagalog, Haitian Creole and French. The 2020 census is happening now. You can respond online, by phone, or by mail. If you are filling out the census for your home, you should count everyone who is or will be living there as of April 1, 2020. “Their voices and their participation in the census and in democracy counts. That’s the story of America, “ said Bernstein. “You might be living in a group housing situation (like a dorm or nursing home), apartment, or house. You might be experiencing homelessness,” said Smith. “Regardless of your living situation, you count. It also doesn’t matter what your citizenship status is, how old you are, or your gender. If you live here, you matter to the census.” Scarlett Liriano Cepin is an iGeneration Youth reporter living in West Hempstead, NY. Read more stories at igenerationyouth.com.

nt and adults the importance of counting their family members in the 2020 U.S. Census. (Photos: isa Bernstein/

the census because it can be complicated to figure out where to count their children. For example, on page 10 of “We Count!,” readers meet a family of five: Frankie, his brother Tomas, and his sister, Nina, who live with their grandparents, Nonno and Nonna. But, their grandparents live in a building that is only for senior citizens. If anyone asks, Frankie, Tomas, and Nina pretend they

are just visiting. “Who should be counted?” the book asks. The answer is all five of them. Frankie, Tomas, Nina, and their grandparents all count on the census. “We Count!” explains that neither the kids nor their grandparents will get in trouble for those answers; instead, the information is used only to answer big

PITTSBURGH CURRENT | MARCH 31, 2020 | 5


NEWS JUST BARELY

COURT RULES HEATHER KASS, CANDIDATE WITH TROUBLING FACEBOOK POSTS, CAN STAY ON BALLOT IN 36TH DISTRICT HOUSE RACE BY 6 VOTES

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espite striking the majority of her contested election petition signatures, a Commonwealth Court Judge ruled late Friday that controversial candidate, Heather Kass will remain on the June 2 Primary ballot. Voter Thomas Wagner, who lives in District 36, filed the challenged the validity of about 360 signatures on the petition of Heather Kass, the controversial candidate running to replace retired Rep. Harry Readshaw. Some were challenged because they were circulated by a person who is not a registered Democrat and many others were challenged for various reasons, including faulty addresses and information being added in by persons other than the signator. A hearing took place on March 11 and of Kass' petition had 642 signatures on it. Judge Patty McCullough found that 336 signatures, more than half were invalid for various reasons. The threshold to get on the ballot is 300 signatures. the Judge ruled Kass had 306 valid signatures, enough for her to remain. Yesterday, March 26, the Current wrote about the unusually long delay to get a ruling in the case. The next day, McCullough released her 38-page opinion. "Candidate has 306 valid signatures, which is in excess of the required 300 signatures. ... The Petition to Set Aside the Nomination Petition of Heather Kass is denied. The Secretary of the Commonwealth is directed to certify Heather Kass as a candidate for the Democratic Party nomination for Representative in the 36th Legislative District, in the primary election to be held on April 28, 2020," McCullough wrote. Kass did not return Pittsburgh Current requests for comment but she told WESA: " “It’s about time some of the hurdles were over with, and we can actually do the campaigning,” This challenge was one of several oddities in the race to replace Readshaw

BY BY CHARLIE DEITCH - PITTSBURGH CURRENT EDITOR CHARLIE@PITTSBURGHCURRENT.COM

in the 36th. Last fall, progressive candidate Jessica Benham announced her challenge to Readshaw and was the only candidate until earlier this year when Readshaw announced his retirement. A short time later, Kass entered the race with endorsements from Readshaw and City Councilor Anthony Coghill. On January 20, the Pittsburgh Current first reported about social media posts from Kass over the past five years that showed support for President Donald Trump, made light of gender identity and common-sense gun control, called people on public assistance “lazy idiots” and said drug addicts should die so there would be “less shit in the world.” Oddly enough, however, this was not the strangest part of the story. On Feb. 16, the Allegheny County Democratic Committee overwhelmingly endorsed Kass over Benham, apparently because Kass still had Readshaw’s backing. That led to bizarre press conferences, calls for resignations in party leadership, actual resignations from party leaders and a county party that was more fractured than it already was. Benham remains in the race and has been running a strong grassroots campaign for more than six months.

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NEWS

TIGHTENING UP

WOLF EXTENDS STAY-AT-HOME ORDER, CLOSES SCHOOLS INDEFINTELY AS PART OF COVID-19 PRECAUTIONS

BY CASSIE MILLER FOR THE PITTSBURGH CURRENT

BY JOHN L. MICEK - FOR THE PITTSBURGH CURRENT INFO@PITTSBURGHCURRENT.COM

Gov. Tom Wolf on Monday ordered Pennsylvania’s 500 school districts closed indefinitely as the state works to contain the growth of COVID-19. And he extended a stay at home order to four more Pennsylvania counties. At a mid-afternoon briefing, the Democratic governor announced that residents in Carbon, Cumberland, Dauphin and Schuylkill counties were now required to stay in their homes and not leave but for a limited series of exceptions. In all, 26 of 67 Pennsylvania counties are now covered by such an order. They are: Allegheny, Beaver, Berks, Bucks, Butler, Carbon, Centre, Chester, Cumberland, Dauphin, Delaware, Erie, Lackawanna, Lancaster, Lehigh, Luzerne, Monroe, Montgomery, Northampton, Philadelphia, Pike, Schuylkill, Washington, Wayne, Westmoreland and York counties. The new order takes effect at 8 p.m. on Monday, March 30 and lasts, for all counties, until April 30, matching an extension announced by the Trump administration on Sunday. All 500 Pennsylvania school districts, along with all non-essential businesses were ordered closed until further notice. Wolf acknowledged the hardship that such an order will cause, but “right now, it isn’t safe.” “We miss being with friends and family members,” he said. ” … We’re getting into warmer weather and spring fever will set in … but stay in we must. This virus is really sneaky. We must must all act as if we do have it. We must self-isolate. We must eliminate the further spread of this disease by staying home.” As of midday Monday, the state had confirmed 4,087 cases of COVID-19 in 59 of 67 Pennsylvania counties, with 48 fatalities. Wolf announced his first school closing order on March 13, with the closing to last for two weeks. The order was later extended to April 6. Last week, lawmakers in the state House and Senate approved, and Wolf signed, legislation

easing instructional requirements for students. On Monday, Wolf said his administration was working on a plan “to make sure that we have a way to provide an education for the kids who are not getting one for the next two months,” and said the hope was “to have it in place for the next few days. By the time we start next week, will have an alternative to the schools not there now.” Wolf later acknowledged that it will be easier for the state to provide laptops to students who might need to learn online, but it will not be as easy to provide them with broadband access they need for that to happen. Last week, officials in the Philadelphia School District announced they planned

ELDER CARE INFO@PITTSBURGHCURRENT.COM

to spend $11 million to purchase ChromeBooks for students who do have access to a computer. A Comcast executive said he planned to cover $5 million of that cost. And the cable giant is offering free access to its xFinity wiFi service in the city, the Philadelphia Tribune reported. Speaking to journalists last week, state Education Secretary Pedro Rivera said his agency has strongly urged all schools in the Commonwealth to offer remote instruction. Rivera said state officials will use “the power of the pulpit” to influence those that don’t. John L. Micek is the editor for the Pennsylvania Capital-Star .

With the state now recording COVID-19 cases in nursing homes, Pennsylvania’s top health official reiterated warnings Sunday for family members to refrain from visiting aged relatives. “Our nursing home patients are often the most vulnerable,” state Health Secretary Dr. Rachel Levine said Sunday during an online briefing. She urged families not to visit their loved ones in personal care homes, if they are happy and healthy. Levine confirmed that 64 cases of COVID-19 have been found at nursing homes across the state. Five percent of those home cases from the southeastern part of the state. Levine suggested calling, video chat and writing letters to stay in touch with loved ones in a personal care home. “I know how challenging it is not to visit your loved one,” Levine said, adding that her mother is in a personal care home. Levine said nursing home employees are asked to stay home if they have symptoms, but are not being tested if they are asymptomatic at this time. As of midday Sunday, Health officials had confirmed 649 new cases of COVID-19 across the state, bringing the state total to 3.394 confirmed cases in 58 of Pennsylvania’s 67 counties. More than 30,000 Pennsylvanians have tested negative thus far, Levine said. In all, 110 cases required treatment in ICU, 64 of those have required the use of ventilators, Levine said. So far, 38 Pennsylvanians have died as a result of COVID-19. According to the Department of Health, all of those deaths occurred in adult patients. Mirroring reports of field hospitals in New York, Levine said two field hospitals are being set up in the southeastern part of the state.Levine also said the state government has purchased ventilators to prepare for a potential surge of COVID cases. “We are working to have ventilators for anyone who needs it,” Levine said. At this time, Levine said the state has enough tests available to meet demand. Cassie Miller is the associate editor for the Pennsylvania Capital-Star .

PITTSBURGH CURRENT | MARCH 31, 2020 | 7


OPINION AMERICAN EXCEPTIONALISM AND THE AGE OF TRUMP

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French social observer and historian, Alexis de Tocqueville touring America recorded his lucid observations of pioneering America. In his book Democracy in America (1840), Tocqueville characterized America as "exceptional" when he wrote, "The position of the Americans is therefore quite exceptional, and it may be believed that no other democratic people will ever be placed in a similar one." A National narrative has often celebrated American exceptionalism. In many moments in history, it was a well-deserved moniker, at other times, not so much. On December 1st, 1862, President Lincoln submitted his second Annual Message to Congress, where he described America as "the last, best hope of earth." In May 1961, President Kennedy aired his ambitious goal to land a man on the moon and explained, "We choose to go to the moon in this decade and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard because that goal will serve to organize and measure the best of our energies and skills, because that challenge is one that we are willing to accept, one we are unwilling to postpone, and one which we intend to win, and the others, too." Kennedy's bold vision came to fruition eight years later. On July 20th, 1969, when Neil Armstrong stepped on the moon, we were all proud to be an American. This was just one of many exceptional American achievements. President Reagan painted America as "a shining city upon a hill whose beacon light guides freedom-loving people everywhere." In his farewell address, Reagan observed, "I've spoken of the Shining City all my political life. In my mind it was a tall, proud city built on rocks stronger than oceans, windswept, God-blessed, and teeming with people of all kinds living in harmony and peace; a city with free ports that hummed with commerce and creativity. And if there had to be city walls, the walls had doors and the doors were open to anyone with the will and the heart to get here. That's how I saw it and see it still."

BY LARRY J. SCHWEIGER - PITTSBURGH CURRENT COLUMNIST INFO@PITTSBURGHCURRENT.COM

Dr. Anthony S. Fauci has had to manage the COVID-19 crisis despite Trump's interference.

America has long been a force for a more democratic and just world. It is fair to say that most white Americans agreed with the assessment that America is a beacon of hope. When Barack Obama was elected many progressives and minorities, particularly African Americans, found hope for a more just society. Claiming to "Make America Great Again," Trump has crippled our government and diminished America on the world stage. In a recent address to Moscow's diplomatic academy, Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov Russia's top diplomat, argued that the world is losing faith in the United States as a global leader. He claims the international community has sought a more diverse approach to decision-making while shifting the center of global economic power to East from West. The sad truth, he is probably right, and the Russians have invested heavily in Trump to make it

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so. What has happened to American exceptionalism? We have gone from being the nation in 2014 that sponsored heroic health professionals who wrestled the Ebola epidemic to the ground in West Africa. Now we are the epicenter of the global pandemic as the most infected country in the world. Americans account for about 20% of all cases in the world today. The cuts to the Center of Disease Control staff of the over the past three years, the complete elimination of the Pandemic Response Team, and the failure to use available WHO's tests when we should have been testing early on. While some other nations took decisive action, Trump's blundering ways gave the virus a two-month head start spreading silently across America. He repeatedly lied to us, claiming it's a hoax, it's going to disappear like a miracle, it's under control, soon it'll be at zero. Make no mistake; more

people are dying and more infected because of this failure. Deaths are now exploding exponentially, doubling every 2-3 days. It took a month for the U.S. to see its first 1,000 coronavirus deaths, the next 1,000 deaths took two days. Trump’s persistent lack of leadership is a threat to us all... Just as it is hard to drive a car in the dark without headlights, it is hard to navigate a pandemic without widespread testing. While Trump promised, "anyone who wants a test can get a test." Testing is still a significant issue three weeks later. I have friends who have all the symptoms of the virus yet they were not tested. So, how many have the virus? It is anyone's guess because not enough tests are available, and the real numbers remain an open issue. New self-testing procedures promising a quick turnaround may soon be helpful to understand the extent of this disease better but this is all late. (We can all help keep track of the spread of the disease by contributing our daily health status to help health professionals track the COVID-19 pandemic through a Harvard crowdsourcing effort called COVID near you.) President Dwight D. Eisenhower once reflected that "Leadership consists of nothing but taking responsibility for everything that goes wrong and giving your subordinates credit for everything that goes well." Trump does the opposite. He blames governors and mayors who clamor about the critical shortages of everything from ventilators masks, gowns, and other vital medical supplies. In times of crisis, Americans want to rally around their President, and rightfully so. However, it is hard to do when Trump behaves like an impetuous child with a profound narcissistic need for admiration from all, excessive attention through his constant and confusing tweets and his lack of empathy. Trump threatened to cut off deliveries to Governors and politicizes the pandemic, causing the most disastrous response among the world. On March 29th, he accused hospitals in New York of allowing masks and PPE supplies to "walk out the back door."


OPINION

President Donald J. Trump listens as Ambassador Debbie Birx, White House Coronavirus Response Coordinator, addresses her remarks at a news conference where President Trump announced a national emergency to further combat the Coronavirus outbreak on Friday, March 13, 2020, in the Rose Garden of the White House. (Official White House Photo by Shealah Craighead)

He followed that outrageous charge against front-line doctors and nurses who have been begging for safety equipment by requesting the media to do an investigation. Fareed Zakaria in a March 26th column in the Washington Post asks a profoundly important question, "Why did this happen? It's easy to blame Trump, and the President has been inept from the start. But there is a much larger story behind this fiasco. The United States is paying the price today for decades of defunding government, politicizing independent agencies, fetishizing local control, and demeaning and disparaging government workers and bureaucrats." We should ponder on how America fell so far so fast. I recently wrote a book entitled Climate Crisis and Corrupt Politics to look behind the curtain at the growing dysfunction of our government to address the climate crisis. What I discovered sadly

applies to our current crisis. The same forces that have trampled on compelling climate science, have ignored the many pandemic warnings, and the need to be prepared. Anti-governmental forces funding elections have caused the contraction of the CDC staffing and crippled our response to the coronavirus. Trump has been demeaning agencies of government calling them the “deep state� while he claimed to be draining-the-swamp while gutting essential safety nets and degrading vital agencies. One of the dark-money funded groups was the Americans for Tax Reform, headed by Grover Norquist, who declared his goal "to cut government in half in twenty-five years, to get it down to the size where we can drown it in the bathtub." Almost every Republican lawmaker signed the Norquist tax pledge and have since been systematically dismantling critical domestic pro-

grams, cutting the budgets of essential agencies year after year while cutting taxes for the uber-wealthy. The widespread cuts to Federal agencies over many years is the culmination of political investments from dark money funders. The mega-wealthy have funded a coordinated effort to spawn anti-government sentiments to cut agencies' budgets including EPA and CDC. Groups like the Tea Party, Americans for Tax Reform, and the Sagebrush Rebellion have been fostering contempt for government and especially for environment, health, and welfare programs. This contempt gave rise to Trump and contorted the Republican party into the Party of Trump. Full stop. Uber-wealthy libertarians like Koch fund Norquist's operation to shrink government. Several dark-money, anti-government donors and corporations have derived enormous political power from the size of their

checkbooks with no regard for how it impacts others. Billionaire Sheldon and Miriam Adelson got a $700 million tax windfall from their casino business and pumped more than $100 million into Republican candidates in 2018. Greed is a sickness that starts with a rotten heart. We must disenthrall ourselves from any lingering notion of exceptionalism. We now have a damaged government that dark money has bought, and we are all paying the price with growing risks with an understaffed, ill-prepared and dysfunctional administrative response. Perhaps this can be the long-needed wake-up call that conservative voters need to grasp the depth of the threat and support the restoration of the America we have loved.

PITTSBURGH CURRENT | MARCH 31, 2020 | 9


ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

PITTSBURGH CULTURAL TRUST REVEALS 2020-

BY PITTSBURGH INFO@PITTSBURG

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ans of the PNC Broadway in Pittsburgh series were pretty disappointed when last week’s reveal of the 20202021 season was delayed due to the coronavirus lockdown. That’s why this morning, the Pittsburgh Cultural Trust decided to release the program schedule to get us all excited for something big to do after the quarantine is lifted. And excitement is the perfect phrase for fans are about to see in a season that presents for the first time in the series’ history two Tony Award-winning Best Musicals in Hamilton and Hadestown. Also on tap is Oklahoma!, the 2019 Tony Award winner for Best Revival, Ain’t Too Proud, My Fair Lady. The Cher Show, Pretty Woman: The Musical and To Kill A Mockingbird. “When the world and life as we knew it turned upside down at the beginning of March, the Pittsburgh Cultural Trust was forced to delay many events, including our 2020-2021 PNC Broadway in Pittsburgh season announcement,” says Marc Fleming, Vice President of Marketing, Communications, and Broadway Programming for the Pittsburgh Cultural Trust. “We received overwhelming feedback from Broadway audiences that they couldn’t wait to learn about next season’s shows. Hearing our fans’ message loud and clear, we are humbled and excited to let the region know about our Tony Award®-winning schedule, one of the best in the history of the series. It’s clear that the arts offer a guiding light in dimmer times and I think everyone is looking forward to gathering to see the curtain rise again in the Cultural District.” Subscription packages to the eight-show the series range from $240 to $909 per subscription. Single tickets generally go on sale six to eight weeks in advance of the show’s opening. Group discounts apply to orders of 10 tickets or more for most events.

Hadestown

SEASON TICKETS: TrustArts. org/Broadway | 412-456-1390 GROUP ORDERS: TrustArts. org/GroupSales | 412-471-6930

AIN’T TOO PROUD

August 25 – 30, 2020 | Benedum Center Ain’t Too Proud – The Life and Times of The Temptations is the electrifying, new smash-hit Broadway musical that follows The Temptations’ extraordinary journey from the streets of Detroit to the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. With their signature dance moves and silky-smooth harmonies, they rose to the top of the charts creating an amazing 42 Top Ten Hits with 14 reaching number one. Nominated for 12 Tony

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Awards®, Ain’t Too Proud tells the thrilling story of brotherhood, family, loyalty, and betrayal, as the group’s personal and political conflicts threatened to tear them apart during a decade of civil unrest in America. The unforgettable story of this legendary quintet is set to the beat of the group’s treasured hits, including “My Girl,” “Just My Imagination,” “Get Ready,” “Papa Was a Rolling Stone,” and so many more. Written by three-time Obie Award winner Dominique Morisseau, directed by two-time Tony Award winner Des McAnuff (Jersey Boys) and featuring the Tony-winning choreography of Sergio Trujillo (Jersey Boys,

On Your Feet!), Ain’t Too Proud launches their first national tour to over 50 cities across America.

HADESTOWN

October 27 – November 1, 2020 | Benedum Center Come see how the world could be. Welcome to Hadestown, where a song can change your fate. Winner of eight 2019 Tony Awards® including Best Musical and the 2020 Grammy Award® for Best Musical Theater Album, this acclaimed new show by celebrated singer-songwriter Anaïs Mitchell and innovative director Rachel Chavkin (Natasha, Pierre & The


ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

-2021 PNC'S BROADWAY IN PITTSBURGH SERIES

CURRENT STAFF GHCURRENT.COM

Great Comet of 1812) is a love story for today…and always. Hadestown intertwines two mythic tales — that of young dreamers Orpheus and Eurydice, and that of King Hades and his wife Persephone — as it invites you on a hell-raising journey to the underworld and back. Mitchell’s beguiling melodies and Chavkin’s poetic imagination pit industry against nature, doubt against faith, and fear against love. Performed by a vibrant ensemble of actors, dancers and singers, Hadestown is a haunting and hopeful theatrical experience that grabs you and never lets go.

play her: the kid starting out, the glam pop star, and the icon. This hit Broadway musical features a book by Tony Award winner Rick Elice, direction by Tony Award nominee Jason Moore and choreography by Tony Award winner Christopher Gattelli. Rolling Stone raves “The Cher Show is an explosion of fabulous excess,” and The New York Times calls it a “a blindingly sparkly celebration of Cher’s life.” The Cher Show is 35 smash hits, six decades of stardom, two rockstar husbands, a Grammy®, an Oscar®, an Emmy®, and enough Tony Award-winning Bob Mackie gowns to cause a sequin shortage in New York City, all in one unabashedly fabulous new musical that will have you dancing in the aisles!

TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD

November 24-29, 2020 | Benedum Center All rise for Academy Award® winner Aaron Sorkin’s adaptation of Harper Lee’s Pulitzer Prizewinning masterwork. The New York Times Critic’s Pick To Kill A Mockingbird is “the most successful American play in Broadway history. It has not played to a single empty seat” (60 Minutes). Rolling Stone gives it five stars, calling it “an emotionally shattering landmark production of an American classic,” and New York Magazine calls it “a real phenomenon. Majestic and incandescent, it’s filled with breath and nuance and soul.” With direction by Tony Award® winner Bartlett Sher, To Kill A Mockingbird — “the greatest novel of all time” (Chicago Tribune) — has quickly become “one of the greatest plays in history” (NPR).

HAMILTON

January 5, 2020 – February 7, 2021 | Benedum Center This “theatrical landmark has

OKLAHOMA!

To Kill A Mockingbird

transformed theater and the way we think about history” (The New York Times) Hamilton is the story of America then, told by America now. Featuring a score that blends hip-hop, jazz, R&B, and Broadway, Hamilton has taken the story of American founding father Alexander Hamilton and created a revolutionary moment in theater — a musical that has had a profound impact on culture, politics, and education. With book, music, and lyrics by Lin-Manuel Miranda, direction by Thomas Kail, choreography by Andy Blankenbuehler, and musical supervision and orchestrations by Alex Lacamoire, Hamilton is based on Ron Chernow’s acclaimed biog-

raphy. It has won Tony®, Grammy®, and Olivier Awards, the Pulitzer Prize for Drama, and an unprecedented special citation from the Kennedy Center Honors.

The Cher Show

February 23 – 28, 2021 | Benedum Center Superstars come and go. Cher is forever. For six straight decades, only one unstoppable force has flat-out dominated popular culture — breaking down barriers, pushing boundaries, and letting nothing and no one stand in her way. The Cher Show is the Tony Award®-winning musical of her story, and it’s packed with so much Cher that it takes three women to

March 9 – 14, 2021 | Benedum Center “How is it that the coolest new show on Broadway is a 1943 musical?” says The New York Times. This is OKLAHOMA! as you’ve never seen or heard it before—reimagined for the 21st century, and now the Tony Award® winner for Best Revival of a Musical. Funny and sexy, dark and jolting, this acclaimed production of OKLAHOMA! “lets us experience Rodgers and Hammerstein’s greatness anew.” (The New Yorker). Stripped down to reveal the darker psychological truths at its core, Daniel Fish’s production tells a story of a community circling its wagons against an outsider, and the frontier life that shaped America. Upending the sunny romance of a farmer and a cowpoke, this OKLAHOMA! allows the classic musical – and our country – to be seen in a whole new light.

PITTSBURGH CURRENT | MARCH 31, 2020 | 11


ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

PITTSBURGH CULTURAL TRUST REVEALS 2020-

PRETTY WOMAN: THE MUSICAL

March 30 – April 4, 2021 | Benedum Center

After an incredible run on Broadway, Audience Choice Award winner Pretty Woman: The Musical is now on tour! One of Hollywood’s most beloved stories of all time, Pretty Woman: The Musical is brought to life by a powerhouse creative team representing the best of music, Hollywood, and Broadway. Featuring direction and choreography by two-time Tony Award® winner Jerry Mitchell (Hairspray, Kinky Boots, Legally Blonde), an original score by Grammy® winner Bryan Adams and Jim Vallance (“Summer of ’69”, “Heaven”), and a book by the movie’s legendary director Garry Marshall and screenwriter J.F. Lawton, Pretty Woman: The Musical will lift your spirits and light up your heart. “If you love the movie, you’ll love the musical!” (BuzzFeed News). Featured in the musical is Roy Orbison and Bill Dee’s international smash hit song “Oh, Pretty Woman,” which inspired one of the most beloved romantic comedy films of all time. Pretty Woman the film was an international smash hit when it was released in 1990. Now, 30 years later, Pretty Woman: The Musical still “Dazzles!” (Deadline) and is “Big romance and big fun!” (Broadway.com). “Irresistible! A romantic fantasy. A contemporary fairy tale,” says The Hollywood Reporter. Pretty Woman: The Musical delivers on all the iconic moments you remember. Get ready to experience this dazzling theatrical take on a love story for the ages.

MY FAIR LADY

April 13 – 18, 2021 | Benedum Center From Lincoln Center Theater that brought you The King & I and South Pacific, comes “a sumptuous new production of the most perfect musical of all time” (Entertainment Weekly), Lerner & Loewe’s My Fair Lady. Director Bartlett Sher’s glowing production is “thrilling, glorious and better than it ever was” (New York Times). “Every so often a revival comes along that reminds you how indispensable great theater can be” (NY1). Boasting such classic songs as “I Could Have Danced All Night,” “The Rain in Spain,” “Wouldn’t It Be Loverly,” and “On the Street Where You Live,” My Fair Lady tells the story of Eliza Doolittle, a young Cockney flower seller, and Henry Higgins, a linguistics professor who is determined to transform her into his idea of a “proper lady.” But who is really being transformed?

BEAUTIFUL: THE CAROLE KING MUSICAL

September 29 – October 4, 2020 | Benedum Center Long before she was Carole King, chart-topping music legend, she was Carol Klein, Brooklyn girl with passion and chutzpah. She fought her way into the record business as a teenager and, by the time she reached her twenties, had the husband of her dreams and a flourishing career writing hits for the biggest acts in rock ‘n’ roll. But it wasn’t until her personal life began to crack that she finally managed to find

12 | MARCH 31, 2020 | PITTSBURGH CURRENT

The Cher Show

her true voice. Beautiful – The Carole King Musical tells the inspiring true story of King’s remarkable rise to stardom, from being part of

a hit songwriting team with her husband Gerry Goffin, to her relationship with fellow writers and best friends Cynthia Weil and Barry Mann, to becoming


ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

-2021 PNC'S BROADWAY IN PITTSBURGH SERIES

Hamilton

one of the most successful solo acts in popular music history. Along the way, she made more than beautiful music, she wrote the soundtrack to a generation.

Featuring a stunning array of beloved songs written by Gerry Goffin/Carole King and Barry Mann/Cynthia Weil, including “I Feel The Earth Move,” “One

Fine Day,” “(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman,” “You’ve Got A Friend,” and the title song, Beautiful has a book by Tony Award® nominee and Academy® Award-nominated writer Douglas McGrath, direction by Marc Bruni, choreography by Josh Prince, and the show took home two 2014 Tony Awards and the 2015 Grammy® for Best Musical Theater Album. Beautiful is currently playing to

sold out crowds at the Stephen Sondheim Theatre on Broadway.

BLUE MAN GROUP

April 27 – May 2, 2021 | Benedum Center More than 35 million people around the world have experienced the smash hit phenomenon that is Blue Man Group and now it’s your turn! Blue Man Group’s new North American Tour is coming to Pittsburgh for a limited engagement.

PITTSBURGH CURRENT | MARCH 31, 2020 | 13


ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT ALBUM REVIEWS

emotional that it could make you feel alone in a room full of friends. It’s important though, not to get too caught up on that word, “traditional” with this record. The music here feels modern, a new spin on an old trope. John Bindley has created a haunting trio of tunes, “Future Tripping,” “Lonely Ride,” and “The Truth.” The steel guitar is on display across the record and combined with Bindley’s vocals will make you nostalgic for heartbreak. Imagine if Luke Bell, Chris Isaak and Neil Young were in a throuple. Solitaire would be their love child.. (Charlie Deitch)

NEW MUSIC FROM SIERRA SELLERS, CHILLER, BILL TOMS AND HARD RAIN, CHIP AND THE CHARGEUPS AND BINDLEY HARDWARE CO. BY MARGARET WELSH AND CHARLIE DEITCH MARGARET@PITTSBURGHCURRENT.COM CHILLER Chiller [Self-released] Chillerpgh.bandcamp.com “We can’t be sick again” is the reteching opening line of “Trainwreck,” the last track on Chiller’s recent self-titled EP. The band released the 7-inch in February. But as i hear my roommate coughing downstairs (allergies, we hope), it’s an especially eerie line, summing up the dread of the past few years (at least): That sense that the next time we get sick -- with a virus, or a broken arm or cancer -- everything will fall apart. It’s the heaviest, slowest track on the otherwise breakneck record (and my favorite, I can’t resist hardcore with a groove!) and reminicent of 2017’s II, the band’s hookiest, most melodic release. Chiller (also self-titled) from 2018 was a move towards something darker, flatter and more urgent. In 2020, the band has only deepened that dense aggression, and this record is like staring down a well, with only the occasional guitar squeal, or especially exciting drum line to reorient you, like a flash of sun reflected in the water. “Couldn’t see the future/ and need to pull apart the past,” begins another track, “Scarecrow”: Perhaps it’s a stretch to call that a precinct description of our current national pastime, but at the very least it’s an appropriate soundtrack to the moment. (Margaret Welsh) SIERRA SELLERS Ophelia [Self-Released] sierrasellers.bandcamp.com In these times of social-distancing and self-isolation, one thing most of us miss more than anything is a good old-fashioned hang. Just being at a spot for no particular reason other than to chill and see what pops off. That’s the concept behind Ophelia, the new five-song EP by Pittsburgh’s own Sierra Sellers. Sellers drew on a time in her

life, summer 2014, when she would daily head down to Ophelia Street in Oakland to see what she could get into. The record kicks off with the title cut, a soulful slow-groove. “Remember them nights down on Ophelia,” Sellers sings. “Them fights down on Ophelia. ...Lost my shit down on Ophelia.” The song shows off Sellers’ vocal range, dipping down low and silky before bouncing up into a higher playful tone, then heading right back down again. The record goes, just as those nights down on Ophelia did. “Grown,” for example, describes her life at the time; 19-years-old, technically an adult, technically “grown,” but still growing through visceral life experiences and situations that she chose to open herself to. Sellers, an NPR “2020 Slingshot Artist to Watch,” has created a piece of auditory art that, if you let it, will take you back to a night down on Ophelia where anything can happen. (Charlie Deitch)

BILL TOMS AND HARD RAIN Live [Tarraplane Records] www.billtoms.com Live records are a delicate and often divisive species, made or broken by sound quality, audience interaction, musicianship, energy, etc. The simply-titled Live, which Bill Toms and Hard Rain (featuring the Soulville Horns) recorded at Club Cafe on May 5th, 2018, hits the necessary points. The sound is studio-clean, the crowd is warm but unintrusive, and the chemistry between the players -- who have been working together for years now -- sizzles. Toms, a veteran musician who got his start in the mid 1980s as lead guitarist for Joe Grushecky and the Houserockers, has the charisma and energy to keep Live buoyant all

14 | MARCH 31, 2020 | PITTSBURGH CURRENT

Sierra Sellers (Current Photo by Jake Mysliwczyk)

the way through, his slightly gruff vocals conducting his compatriots with theatrical flair without overshadowing them. In its best moments, the record echoes the brilliant jubilance of another sax-heavy live record, Springsteen’s Hammersmith Odeon London ’75. Toms ain't the Boss (who is?) but Live shows him to be a powerful performer and an ace songwriter in his own right. “This is a performance band,” he says in a press release for the album. “We try to carry the long rhythm and blues tradition of moving from town to town, exhausting the emotion and physical spirit of the crowd.” A live record may never be a substitute for the real thing, but until we can go back outside, Live is a more-than acceptable facimalie. (Margaret Welsh) BINDLEY HARDWARE CO. Solitaire [Misra] www.bindleyhardwareco.com Most of the time, you think of the term “Traditional Country Music” as a description of a certain kind of sound, a composition. But the phrase can also refer to a theme. And there is no concept more traditional in country music than loneliness. On this new EP, John Bindley and the boys have created a sound that is rooted in that old country tradition, and assembled a collection of songs so sincere and

CHIP AND THE CHARGE UPS Lightning in Our Veins [Self-released] www.thechargeups.com Anyone who has been following the trajectory of Chip Dominick -- formerly as the frontman for hard-rock band Chip DiMonick, and now with Chip and the Charge Ups -- knows him to be a purveyor of consistently upbeat, big-hearted pop music. With the Charge Ups, Dominick has moved towards something that falls between pop punk and power pop, without losing the hair-metal gregariousness of his past ventures. Lightnight in Our Veins -- the band’s third release, out April 3rd -- is a high-energy celebration of what it means to really, really love music: “When i was thirteen, my heart was struck/this music packed more power than love ...There’s lightning in my veins now” begins “Feel Electricity.” Even if the music isn’t really your thing, it's hard not to be swept up in the raw excitement that radiates from this record. As a whole, Lightnight in Our Veins is a bit of a hodge-podge, including a cover of “The Tide is High” (which I can imagine on the soundtrack to a Netflix teen drama), a surprisingly successful mashup of Lady Gaga’s “Bad Romance” and Ozzy’s “Bark at the Moon,” and the band’s Christmas song, “Black and Gold Christmas.” On paper, it’s an odd mix; give it a listen and you may surprise yourself with your own big dopey grin. (Margaret

Welsh)


Pittsburgh Pandemic Resturant Guide

Open for Business

A partical list of restuarants serving during the COVID19 pandemic. Photo - Nana's New York Hot Dogs

PITTSBURGH CURRENT | MARCH 31, 2020 | 15


FOOD

Photo - Bistro To Go

RESTURANT GUIDE THE SHINY BEAN

333 BUTLER ST, ETNA 412-799-2326 www.theshinybean.com, #theshinybean

CARRYOUT

21 different sandwiches. Outside grill serving Hot sausage, kielbasa and hot dogs. Please support small business.

Coffee, tea, quarts of homemade soup and some grocery items (milk, bread, eggs, butter, etc)

NANCY'S REVIVAL

NORTH SHORE DELI

CARRYOUT & DOORDASH

539 E OHIO STREET, NORTH SIDE 412-231-2812 northshoredeli.com Facebook:North Shore Deli

CARRYOUT

616 SOUTH AVE, WILKINSBURG 412 242 3447 Nancysrevival.com

Breakfast and lunch We offer carryout and delivery both by our staff and third parties. We also have Grubhub and Doordash.

16 | MARCH 31, 2020 | PITTSBURGH CURRENT

PLEASURE BAR & RESTAURANT

4729 LIBERTY AVE, BLOOMFIELD 412-682-9603 pleasurebarpittsburgh.com/

CARRYOUT & POSTMATES

Traditional Italian fare and 6-packs to go. Modified hours, 12-8pm call ahead 1 hour to order.

BISTRO TO GO CAFE & CATERING 415 EAST OHIO STREET, NORTH SIDE 412-231-0218

Bistroandcompany.com, FB: @bistrotogoandcompany, Insta: @bistrotogo_

CARRYOUT

We are offering curbside pickup to your trunk (carryout) as well as delivery through our restaurant's drivers. Our “Deliciousness Delivered” menu offers five traditional specials, along with two vegetarian/vegan options, along with several of our sandwiches, staples and sides. It’s Healthy comfort food. We're offering a “Bistro Fish Fry To Go” on Fridays during lent. $44 for a family of four, batter fried or "oven fried' baked (what we're known for) with mac & cheese and coleslaw..


FOOD PEOPLES INDIAN RESTAURANT 5147 PENN AVENUE. GARFIELD 412-862-7500 Search for us on Facebook Delivery through GrubHub

THE LUNCH BOX

1307 FEDERAL ST. NORTH SIDE 412-378-7427 www.thelunchboxpgh.com

CARRYOUT

Made to order Sandwiches, soups, salads, etc..

BEANTHRU

4221 OHIO RIVER BOULEVARD, NORTH SIDE 412-761-3400 Beanthru.com @beanthru

CARRYOUT & DOORDASH

Premium drive through coffee and espresso with a lot of delicious food options as well! You have to try our oat milk lattes! Your life will be changed!! Photo - Yinzburgh BBQ

BEANTHRU

1921 WILLIAM FLYNN HWY, GLENSHAW 412-486-9400 BeanThru.com @beanthru

CARRYOUT & DOORDASH

Premium drive through coffee and espresso shop with lots of delicious food options as well! We also deliver via DoorDash! Brown Sugar Cinnamon Lattes are amazing! Try it made with oat milk!!

PIZZA PARMA

217 SOUTH HIGHLAND AVE, HIGHLAND PARK 412-441-6600

www.pizzaparma.us Delivery through restaurant's drivers & Uber Eats

PIZZA PARMA

963 LIBERTY AVE., DOWNTOWN 412-577-7300

www.pizzaparma.us Delivery through restaurant's driv-

ers & Uber Eats

CORNER MERCANTILE

472 WOOD ST., DOWNTOWN 412-586-5738 cornermercantile.com

CARRYOUT

Grab-and-go salads, sandwiches and prepared foods $1 off any size drip coffee 7:30- 10 am

BIGHAM TAVERN

321 BIGHAM STREET, MT. WASHINGTON 4124319313

www.bighamtavern.com @bighamtavern Delivery through restaurant's drivers. Known for our award winning wings with over 30 flavors! Now delivering breakfast in bed Saturdays and Sundays! We are also open for carryout and delivery

GAB & EAT

1073 WASHINGTON AVENUE, CARNEGIE

wwww.azoreancafe.com

4122768808

Gab & Eat Restaurant on Facebook, https://www.facebook.com/ GabNEat1999

CARRYOUT

Award-Winning American diner serving breakfast and lunch, known best for our burgers and mixed grills! We will be offering Delivery during the quarantine!

M.I.C.K.

1580 MCLAUGHLIN RUN ROAD, UPPER ST. CLAIR 4122216040

www.mick-usc.com @m.i.c.k.usc_pa

CARRYOUT

A variety of comfort food all made from scratch Daily specials, please call for more details. 10 percent off for return customers

AZOREAN CAFE

4715 LIBERTY AVE., BLOOMFIELD 412-586-4241

CARRYOUT & GRUBHUB

Portuguese Cuisine. Full menu available Buy one entree get second for half price Free coffee with Breakfast

BRGR

5997 CENTRE AVENUE, EAST LIBERTY 412-362-2333

www.brgrpgg.com, @brgrpgh

CARRYOUT & GRUBHUB Burgers, fries, salads, shakes

SPICE AFFAIR INDIAN CUISINE

6 BRILLIANT AVE, ASPINWALL 412-847-7423

Spiceaffairpittsburgh.com Delivery through restaurant's drivers & GrubHub We serve north Indian food Free lunch or dinner for senior citizens in Fox Chapel area.

KRISTA'S CANTINA

2650 CALIFORNIA AVE.,

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FOOD get special offers sent out - Free delivery all month with DoorDash, Uber Eats and when ordering direct through our app

NOODLES & COMPANY MARKET SQUARE 476 MCMASTERS WAY, DOWNTOWN 412-562-2191 www.noodles.com/order

CARRYOUT & UBER EATS

Noodles, Soups & Salads Free delivery through DoorDash, Uber Eats and when ordering directly through our Rewards app. Sign up for the app and get special offers sent out through the end of the month

CHOOLAAH

6114 CENTRE AVENUE, EAST LIBERTY 4125037797

Bean Thru

MARSHALL-SHADELAND 412-766-1676 CARRYOUT

Wings, fries, chicken tenders, buffalo chicken, loaded fries, crab cakes Take out available until midnight

BRONZE HOOD

5920 STEUBENVILLE PIKE, MCKEES ROCKS 15136 412-787-7240 Bronzehood@comcast.net

CARRYOUT & GRUBHUB

Amazing Fish Sandwiches, pizza and wings plenty of other sandwiches as well Friday ask about the Baby Whaler Special

CAPPY’S CAFE

5431 WALNUT ST., SHADYSIDE 412-621-1188

@cappyscafepgh (instagram/twitter) Facebook.com/cappyscafePgh www.cappysonwalnut.com

CARRYOUT & DOORDASH

Fresh Burgers cooked to order, Reubens and Rachels , Wraps , Salads, Hoagies and 9” PIZZAS Wings, Sweet potato fries, Our Famous Chili, KID’S MENU. Breakfast 10am-2pm sat and sun Beer To Go - 6 packs and growler refills available Quick Delicious Pizzas. 6-Cut Plain pizza for only $7.50 Friday Lenten Fish Special - 9-oz beer-battered fish sandwich and (fries or coleslaw ) $10.50

Choolaah.com / twitter.com/ Choolaahyum / www.facebook.com/ ChoolaahPGH/ Instagram.com/ Choolaahyum Delivery through a third-party service. Postmates https://choolaah.com/our-food/ Takeout and Delivery / UberEats, GrubHub, DoorDash & Postmates

MIKE'S BEER BAR

110 FEDERAL STREET, NORTH SIDE 4123222337 mikesbeerbar.com

CARRYOUT

Sandwiches and Salads $10 for Sandwich, side and soft drink

NOODLES & COMPANY

3805 FORBES AVE OAKLAND 412-621-0890 www.noodles.com/order

CARRYOUT & UBER EATS

Noodles, Soups & Salads sign up with our Rewards app and

18 | MARCH 31, 2020 | PITTSBURGH CURRENT

Photo - Cappy's Cafe

YINZBURGH BBQ

4903 BAUM BLVD., BLOOMFIELD 412-621-9469 www.yinzburghbbq.com Delivery through a third-party service. GrubHub Southern BBQ & Low Country Kitchen

CAFE ON THE CORNER

2700 SHADELAND AVE., MARSHALL-SHADELAND 412-726-5796

www.cafeonthecornerpgh.org Delivery through a third-party service & DoorDash Gumbo, Fish sandwiches, deli sandwiches (corn beef, turkey, roastbeef), paninis, reuben sandwiches, soul food. Gumbo, over rice and cornbread

NANA'S NEW YORK HOT DOGS 1110 FEDERAL STREET, NORTH SIDE 412-904-2785 nanasnorthsidedogs

CARRYOUT

Hot Dogs, Hamburger, Cheesesteaks … Full Breakfasts all day


FOOD ACORN

5528 WALNUT STREET PITTSBURGH PA 15232 412-530-5950

www.acornpgh.com or @acornpgh

CARRYOUT & GRUBHUB

Now Available Daily Acorn Takeout & Delivery 11:30am – 1:30pm 4:30pm – 8:30pm Call or Order Online at Acornpgh.com for Takeout & Direct Free Delivery Orders or Find Us on Grub Hub Current Menu Items: Bubbe’s Matzo Ball Soup, Tossed Chicken Salad, Cheeseburger, Italian Beef Sandwich, Fried Fish Sandwich, Fried Chicken Sandwich Fish Tacos. Mac N Cheese, Shrimp & Grits, Fish & Chips, Fried Chicken Plate. Gift Card Special: $20 free with $100 Purchase. Available for purchase on our website

NORTHSIDE 412-331-8000

www.legendseatery.us Delivery through a third-party service. Uber Eats Classic Italian specialties. Chicken Parmesan, Veal, Spots, Penne Vodka Open Sundays 4-8 pm

ZOUP

1137 FREEPORT ROAD, FOX CHAPEL 412-432-8712

Zoup.com Delivery through a third-party service & Uber Eats Soup, Salad & Sandwiches

SMALLMAN STREET DELI

2840 SMALLMAN STREET, STRIP DISTRICT 412-434-5800 smallmanstreetdeli.com

DENTED KEG BREWING COMPANY

700 ADAMS SHOPPES, MARS 724-591-5511

www.dentedkeg.com, FB @dentedkeg, Instagram @dentedkeg, Twitter @dentedkegbc

CARRYOUT & UBER EATS Deli foods

NICKY’S THAI KITCHEN MULTIPLE LOCATIONS

www.nickysthaikitchen.com

CARRYOUT & GRUBHUB

CARRYOUT

We are selling our beer and cider to go only. No food at this time.

Authentic Thai A few take out specials on website to help making staying at home more enjoyable

FORBES GYRO

SPOON FED

3715 FORBES AVE, OAKLAND 4126212140

http://orderforbesgyros.com/ Delivery through a third-party service & Uber Eats Serving Gyro, Salads, Kebabs, Hoagies, Pizza and Calzone

SUSHI FUKU

120 OAKLAND AVE, OAKLAND 412-687-3858

www.sushifuku.com Delivery through a third-party service. Uber Eats Build your own sushi, poke bowl, & burrito. We are offering a FREE SIDE or DRINK on all Pickup orders

LEGENDS EATERY

500 E. NORTH AVE.,

5997 CENTRE AVENUE EAST LIBERTY 619-855-1178

@spoonfed

CARRYOUT & UBER EATS

Family style meals delivered to the Fox Chapel area Uber Eats is running a BOGO offer this weekend

EAT’N PARK

www.eatnpark.com

MULTIPLE LOCATIONS

New delivery service at 29 area locations. Carryout available through drive-thru windows or rapid pick-up shelves. Order online, through the Eat’n Park app or by calling the restaurant. During the COVID-19 crisis, Eat’n Park locations are temporarily operating under limited hours of 10

a.m. to 8 p.m. and offering a limited menu of guest favorites.

HELLO BISTRO

hellobistro.com New expanded delivery service to all customers. Rapid pickup shelves. Order online or with the Hello Bistro app. Entire menu available for delivery. Signature salads, make-your-own salads, fresh-cut fries and burgers. Hello Bistro’s locations and modified hours include: Downtown (292 Forbes Avenue) Monday – Friday: 11 a.m. – 5 p.m.; Oakland (3605 Forbes Avenue) Daily: 11 a.m. – 5 p.m.; South Side (1922 East Carson Street) Daily: 11 a.m. – 7 p.m.; Pine (1000 Village Run Road) Daily: 11 a.m. – 7 p.m.; McCandless (701 Providence Boulevard) Daily: 11 a.m. – 7 p.m.; Monroeville (4100 William Penn Highway) Daily: 11 a.m. – 7 p.m.

FLAVORS FAMOUS STREET FOOD 3231 Brighton Rd. North Side

313-632-9292 www.www.flavorsstreetfood.com Carryout, DoorDash, GrubHub, Uber Eats, Postmates Wings, BBQ Ribs, Philly Cheesesteak, Italian Beef, Seafood and chicken combos, Loaded frides and Impossible Burgers. $5 Philly & Fries ( Tuesday &Friday) .50-cent wings on Wednesday, 4-8 p.m.

CHEF'S TABLE INSPIRED BY KEVIN WATSON 2193 Babcock Blvd., North Hills

412-821-8100 www.chefstablepgh.com Carryout, Delivery through restaurant's drivers and DoorDash We're a freshm made-to-order restaurant focused on serving helthy meals for the good of heart and soul. Our menu puts an all-natural twist on favorite dishes from around the world. We also offer curbside pickup. Daily specials posted on Facebook.

DIANOIA'S EATERY 2549 Penn Avenue

4129181875 Www.dianoiaseatery.com

Two Sisters Vietnamese Kitchen

Carryout, GrubHub

We are serving a limited menu of appetizers, sandwiches and pastas as well as grocery items and beer and wine for takeout from 11am8pm. We are also offering family meal packages on our website. Gift card special: buy $100, get $20 free.

TWO SISTERS VIETNAMESE KITCHEN

216 N. Highland Ave. East Liberty 412-404-2760 Instagram: twosisters_pgh

Carryout. DoorDash

We have many authentic dishes including pho, vermicelli noodles, rice dishes, and many more specialities we like to offer!

PIZZERIA DAVIDE

2551 Penn Ave., Strip District

4129044149 Www.pizzeriadavide.com Carryout, DoorDash, GrubHub, Uber Eats Our regular menu of appetizers, pizza and sandwiches is available. We are also offering grocery items and beer and wine to go. 10% off for all service industry professionals

PITTSBURGH CURRENT | MARCH 31, 2020 | 19

Chef'


Acorn

Azorean Cafe

BRGR

Bronze Hood

Cafe on the Corner

Choolaah

Corner Mercantile

Dented Keg Brewing Company

Eat’n Park

Forbes Gyro

Hello Bistro

Krista's Cantina

Legends Eatery

M.I.C.K.

Mike's Beer Bar

Nana's New York Hot Dogs

Nancys Revival

Nicky’s Thai Kitchen

Noodles & Company

North Shore Deli

Peoples Indian Restaurant

Pizza Parma

Pleasure Bar Pittsburgh

Smallman Street Deli

Spice Affair Indian Cuisine

Spoon Fed

Sushi Fuku

The Lunch Box

The Shiny bean

Zoup

20 | MARCH 31, 2020 | PITTSBURGH CURRENT


Current Comics Heroineburgh By H-burgh and Wayne Brown

Andrew Schubert

PITTSBURGH CURRENT | MARCH 31, 2020 | 21


EXTRA

Savage Love Love | sex | relationships

M

BY DAN SAVAGE MAIL@SAVAGELOVE.NET

y husband and I got married in August of 2019 and we were together for over five years before getting married. I’m very happy and love him with all my heart. I want to have his kids and support his entrepreneurial efforts as he supports mine. We don’t fight, we just have some tiffs here and there. The kicker is that I have a tough time feeling him during sex and he doesn’t last as long as I would like him to. We’re adventurous enough to try different things, i.e. toys and different positions, but I find myself sexually unfulfilled. He also isn’t very willing/ interested in going down on me, in fact he has not once gone down on me. I’m also finding myself attracted to and fantasizing about other men. I Do you have any other insights or suggestions on what to do? Married Not Dead P.S. I hope you, your family, and your friends are holding up ok during this pandemic. It’s a scary time so I hope you’re all ok. I shared your letter with Tristan Taormino, author of Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships. Through her books, lectures, and podcasts (“Sex Out Loud Radio”), Taormino has helped countless couples navigate the transition from monogamy to non-monogamy. But before we dive into the specifics of your situation, MND, there’s something Taormino and I want to make clear to all. “In this time of a global pandemic, thinking and talking about non-monogamy is all you can do right now,” said Taormino. “This goes for everyone: no new sex partners until public health experts say we can go back to standing closer than six feet apart. Even then, we’re going to have to proceed with caution.” Listen up, people: the woman who literally wrote the book on open relationships says open and poly relationships are cancelled for the time being. “Yup, cancelled,” said Taormino, “unless every one of your partners lives with you.” While COVID-19 isn’t classified as a sexually transmitted infection (STI), having sex with someone who has coronavirus would

almost certainly result in transmission. And since people who get infected typically don’t show symptoms for up to two weeks, the fact that someone appears to be healthy doesn’t mean they are corona-free. Someone can look and feel great and be both infected and infectious. So for the time being we should only be having sex with a sex partner we live with. But the good news is that sext messages and dirty video chats are both allowed and encouraged, kids, so we can get off online with new people as well as established partners who live on the other side of town or the other side of the world. Hell, get the whole polycule together on Zoom—just don’t actually get together (or get under) anyone you don’t live with. Okay! With that out of the way, MND, we’re going to answer your question. But bear in mind that some of our advice—our advice about opening up your marriage—won’t be fully actionable until after COVID-19 is brought under control. “I’m glad MND is being honest with her husband about her desires, but let’s take that further with even more specific talk about what’s missing in her sex life,” said Taormino. “In her letter, I heard: pussyeating, intense enough sensation from intercourse, and longer sex sessions. I’ll translate that: she’s missing pleasure, reciprocation, and orgasms for her.” Backing way the hell up: assuming you knew about my column five years ago, MND, it’s telling you didn’t ask for my advice back when you realized your new boyfriend was never going to eat your pussy. (Spoiler: I would’ve told you to dump him.) Since you chose not to break up with your boyfriend over the lack cunnilingus back then and you don’t want to divorce your husband over it now, MND, it would seem that going without oral—at least going without at home—is the price of admission you’re willing to pay to be with this guy. As for your other issues about your sex life with your husband—you don’t “feel him” during penis-in-vagina (PIV) intercourse and it’s over too quickly—the right toys could certainly help. But if your husband ruled out

22 | MARCH 31, 2020 | PITTSBURGH CURRENT

penetration toys that were bigger than his cock, MND, or if you didn’t order any that were bigger than his cock to avoid hurting his feelings, you’re gonna have to broach the subject of buying some larger toys, MND, ones you can really feel. And since experimenting with new positions didn’t help your husband last longer, you should try alternating between toys and his cock during PIV, which will make both the sex (and the husband) last longer. “If MND’s husband is really in this relationship, he should be open and willing to give most anything a try,” said Taormino. “MND really needs to see that he’s as interested in her pleasure and satisfaction as he is in his own. And if there’s something she wants to try or something that really turns her on and gets her off that her husband doesn’t know about, now is the time to share the juicy details.” As for opening up the relationship, MND, I wouldn’t advise most people to initiate that convo at this moment. Because if the conversation goes badly—and they often do at first—that could mean sheltering in place with an angry person. But based on your husband’s reaction when you confessed having a crush

on a coworker, MND, I think you could risk discussing opening up while you’re locked down. Your husband didn’t say there was nothing wrong with fantasizing about a snack, MND, he said there’s nothing wrong with having a snack. Make no mistake: that’s not a green light to immediately outsource getting your pussy eaten. But his calm, matter-of-fact reaction when you confided in him about your crush is a good sign. But first things first: you need to work with your husband on improving your sex life at home and you should have a convo about that—and a convo about ordering some new sex toys—before you make plans to open up the relationship and start getting your pussy eaten elsewhere. “Exploring non-monogamy is one way to address sexual incompatibilities and expand our capacity for love and intimacy,” said Taormino. “But the stuff between the two of them needs to gets talked about first. Otherwise, you’re glossing over the issues with something new and shiny.” Follow Tristan Taormino on Twitter @ TristanTaormino.

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ESSAY

BIG DIRTY'S PICKUP TRUCK BY MATT WALLENSTEIN - PITTSBURGH CURRENT CONTRIBUTING WRITER INFO@PITTSBURGHCURRENT.COM

H

e is big enough to break someone in half if he wanted to, but I have only seen Big Dirty hit another man in anger once and it was deserved. That’s another story though. He is and has been by all accounts and experience what I consider to be a rare thing; a genuinely good person. He is large, kind, and can fix anything with a motor. He bought the truck and loved it. This old rust colored Ford he got for transporting his dirt bike from place to place. The first time I saw it I was hanging out in front of Dave’s garage in Braddock where Big Dirty, Dave, and Jay usually took turns fixing the clunkers I bought. Big Dirty was fixing some part of my car that he explained to me but I didn’t understand. He said he wanted to show me his new truck and took me around the side of the building to see it. I was happy that he had bought it, it made him happy. He had had a rough go of it lately. He’d just split with his live-in girlfriend, among other things. He showed me the inside,

the outside, laughed when he said you didn’t need a key to start it. He asked me what I thought about it, I told him I liked it, told him I used to have a truck, he asked what kind, I told him blue. A couple days later it was stolen for the first time. It was a blow to him. He had taken it to West Virginia once to ride his dirt bike, brought it back, and then one day when he showed up at Dave’s garage where he had parked it, it was gone. Jay had borrowed it a couple times and he thought that may have been what happened. He made some calls and no one knew where it was. He caved and called the cops to say it was stolen. Two days later he got the call saying it was in an impound lot a couple towns over. The cop explained it’d been taken by some 15-year-old kid. They had pulled him over in Mckeesport, he told them he was on his way to his girlfriends house and he had borrowed the truck from a friend. So Big Dirty drove his dirt bike over to the impound lot, paid his $220, and got the truck

back. There was a broken-off key in the ignition belonging to a different vehicle that he had to fish out. When he turned it on he found the radio cranked all the way up on a pop country station. The kid must have stolen it and turned it all the way up listening to Tim McGraw. He told me later the kid must have pried the old-fashioned smokers’ windows open and gotten in that way. When Big Dirty got it back to the shop he boxed it in to ensure it couldn’t be stolen again. He parked it right up against the building and had a car parked on each side of it. About a week later he showed up to work at Dave’s around 8 in the morning and found a big empty space where his truck had been. The car that he’d parked behind it was sitting in the middle of the road. He just stood there a minute looking before an older man who was sitting on a nearby porch gestured to him. Dirty went over. “I seen what happened.” “You did? You saw what they did to my truck?” “About 3, 4 in the morning, they come up in a minivan, a whole bunch of them get out. They get around that car and there was enough of them, they picked it up and moved it to the middle of the street right there and the one kid, he just got in that truck and drove away, scrawny kid, redhead maybe. I would have called somebody but I was smoking a joint, I didn’t want to get myself in trouble.” Dirty reported it stolen again. And he put the word out to friends that it was missing. He got a phone call, it was from his ex-girlfriend’s new boyfriend of all people, telling him he found the truck. Big Dirty went over to where he’d said it was. It had been crashed, blunt wrappers were on the seat and floor, the door was open, the battery was dead. Jay brought him a battery and when they hooked it up the radio was on full blast again playing pop country. Same kid. When Big Dirty got the truck back to Dave’s he unplugged the battery and took it inside, He removed the starter, he unplugged the distributor. If the kid was going to try again it would be impossible for him to take the truck without those parts.

Dave installed cameras on his garage. For a few days things were back to normal. Then Dirty showed up to work one morning to find the hood of the truck open with a battery and a distributor cable plugged in. If the kid had a starter Dirty would have been out of a truck again. I walked my dog down to the garage and they showed me the security footage. It showed a redheaded teenager looking around, popping the hood, trying the set up, then leaving. He didn’t look like much to me. In highschool I probably would have beaten him up and taken his shoes. Later that week Jay was making small talk with the guy who ran the junkyard across the street. He asked the guy if anyone had ever tried stealing a car out of there. As it turned out the junkyard had dealt with the same kid who took Big Dirty’s truck. Apparently he had come by there a few times doing damage to things, breaking into cars. Most recently he had climbed the fence, broken into a car and driven it right through the fence to get out. He told him this time he had caused around 20 grand worth of damage. The junkyard man explained that, as it turned out, the kid’s uncle was a cop, which is why he kept getting let go without any consequences. But according to him, he had had enough. He knew who the kid was so he found out where he lived, dragged him out of the house bare-footed and scared the hell out of him, convinced him to tell the police the truth. His uncle got the charges down but couldn’t make them disappear. He ended up with an ankle bracelet, but according to the junkyard man, the last anyone knew was that the kid had cut it off and left town. Big Dirty eventually sold the truck for what would have been a good profit if you don’t factor in the cost of the impound lot, and towing, the cops, the wasted time, the frustration and all the rest of it. Matthew Wallenstein is the author of the recently released short story collection Buckteeth (March 2020) as well as Tiny Alms, book of poetry published by Permanent Sleep Press (2017). His work has previously been published by the University of Maine Farmington, Albany Poets, the University of Chicago, Easy Village, Ryerson University, and others. He lives in Braddock.

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