Brain Stew issue 12, 24-25

Page 1


now boasts a

The recently selected (and very questionably designated) F-47 will be built here in a few years. Seriously, it is just 7km from the Provincial House toilets at McDonnell Douglas Boeing Defense Space and Security. For anyone who does not know, this is next to the cargo terminal at Lambert. While obviously you should not go into unauthorized areas looking for secret military hardware, as that is a great way to get shot, it will not be possible to hide these aircraft from public view forever. The production facilities and temporary hangars are in some of the white structures designed to prevent satellite imagery from detecting aircraft. This information is publicly available and is not being stated for any particular reason; no we are definitely not going to try and glimpse what is inside from the terminal, certainly not.

What we are NOT looking for:

A wide, flat aircraft with canards. Or not and this is a misleading image. It could be anything. Regardless, it will be easier to not see it on the ground than at speeds “over two”.

Hello.

I am of knowings the buisnessings good.

As you are of the know, there is of the beings large problem in regardingsings the pay inequalities. Somes of the peoples are of calling its of beings “gender wage gap”.

The issue is of the gender wage gap of is womens are of the makings 68.5 percentagings of men salary. Is of beings problem, yes, but, of course we cannot of payings women more as company must of do the increase profit. Shareholder is of demand it be.

But it is of not havings to be of problem. We can doings the make eliminate of inequality and increasings of the profits in the time simultaneous.

For of the startings, we are of not payings women of more. This is not of being profit. We must be of removings all men and therefore, worker costs are of beings less overall. If was of the opperatings in success before, profit is now of increasings by 34.25 percentagings of previous worker costs yes. There is now of no beings disparities when there is of no existence men.

But there is of problem. When we are in the doings disposal of men, corpses decomposition outside will be of reducings the values of the properties. This is of much bad. However, we, in the buisnessings must see of challenge being glorious opportunity. Now we are of the havings free source of raw materialings for processed meat products yes. That is of no resource meat expensings to be include in product. We are of the makings record profit. No one ever be of the questionings source of meat in the meat of process and it therefore of beings fine that we no be of check individual health of usings of medications before use.

Now we are of the see that there is only good resultings from plan. Many people are of accuse buisnessings peoples of not solvings issues of the systemic and big proportional. Of course, they are of the beings much wrong. As is of demonstrate here yes, it is not only of possible, but also of profitable to be of takings the actions morally correct. There will only be of resultings in much successes.

Goodbye and of much profit.

THE US GOVERNMENT KNOWS YOUR SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER!

TRAINS ALWAYS RUN LATE FOR A REASON! WHY DOES AN OUT OF SERVICE TRAIN COME FROM THE AIRPORT DURING THE DAY?!

BRAIN STEW IS GOVERNMENT CONTROLED MEDIA! OUR DEAR LEADER IS THE EDITOR! OUR THOUGHTS ARE NOT OUR OWN!

QUAD CONSTRUCTION IS DESIGNED TO CURTAIL UTENSLE USAGE!

THESE ARE THE THINGS THAT THEY DO NOT WANT YOU TO KNOW!

by Jocelyn “Munn” Sanchez
: Or how I learned
“classified” information because boomers can’t use their phones by Abby Wall

April 2, 2024 – St. Louis, MO

Ping…ping ping….ping ping ping….ping…ping ping ping ping ping ping. Ugh, why is my phone notification going off non-stop? Wait, wtf is “saffron powder” and why is it “only for lazy, scumsucking pedophile monsters who deserve to die of butt cancer because they won’t learn how to oil roast saffron!” And more importantly, why the hell am I in this group chat?

To be honest, the messages weren’t quite like that. The sentences and sentiments are all accurate, but I’ve removed all of the misspellings and other weird stuff that looks like someone with hotdog fingers was trying to text. And I certainly did not ask to be added to this Signal Group, which was officially titled “Munn-Carstensen Family Chat.” I kept reading for about an hour or so but grew bored and stopped. So it was quite shocking the next day to hear Ed accuse me of being a spy and threatening to deport me for supporting Hamas. I assume he meant Hamas, which I don’t support. But if he actually meant hummus, which is how he spelled it, then I am guilty as charged. I won’t bore you with all of it, but here’s a representative selection:

Susie: thoughts on dinner 2nite?

Eddie: paella!!!!!!!

Davey: i just cant. dad, luv u, but ive eaten paella 4012x in my life. i did the math

Susie: chinese?

Eddie:

Davey: tacos?

Eddie: speedy gonzalez is racist

Susie: spaghetti?

Eddie: chef boyardee owned slaves

Anie: why do we have this conversation everyday

Susie: fine. paella. what do I need to pick up from the store still?

Eddie: classified, classified, classified, classified, and if I see powdered saffron in this house again, I’m moving back to north carolina or south caronlina I forget where we used to live but it was one of those

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Brain Stew issue 12, 24-25 by Pierre Laclede Honors College - Issuu