TIM E F O R YO U
5 Tips For How To Master Self Love Wr i tte n by G ra c e H u a ng
I
n a culture where we’re taught to conform and receive massive amounts of conditioning and programming, self love is a concept that seems elusive to many of us. Although self love is rapidly gaining traction, exactly how to put this into practice can still feel like a dog chasing his tail. For this reason, I’ve put together a practical guide of things to focus on in order to master self love, and to help you continue on your journey to fulfillment and wellness. 1. Love Yourself Without Ifs, Ands, Or Buts To love yourself unconditionally means that no matter what we are or aren’t doing, how we are feeling, we love ourselves nonetheless. That is to 3 2 | M A R C H / A P R I L 20 20
say, the love we hold for ourselves is not contingent upon any requirement, achievement, emotional state - or lack thereof. So whether or not you do well in school, meet that work deadline, fight with your friends and partner, sink into depression, are unproductive, eat healthfully - you accept these aspects of yourself as part of the current truth of yourself. We accept and love these parts without expecting them to change. The radical concept here is we love ourselves simply for existing. This is so far from what we are taught very early on in childhood. Most of us grew up in households run by the reward-punishment dynamic. With this kind of upbringing, we subconsciously learn that we are loved for
being a certain way or doing specific things. Subconsciously as children, we then reject, disown, or suppress the parts of ourselves that do not fit this narrative in order to receive the love from our families that we so desperately need. When we learn that parts of us are unacceptable, it can be hard to reintegrate them into our whole selves, especially when we feel that there is something innately wrong with these parts of us. The nature of love in the vast majority of relationships on Earth today are conditional and transactional, whether those relationships are familial, platonic, or romantic. Conditional love means - I love you for the parts of you I deem acceptable.
