November 1, 2017 - Pittsburgh City Paper

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 11.01/11.08.2017


EVENTS

A John Waters’ Christmas: Holier & Dirtier

11.3 – 7pm COWBOY CINEMA The Warhol theater Join film scholar Dr. Mark Best and Chief Curator Jose Diaz as they discuss campy western film clips. This event is presented in connection with the Farhad Moshiri: Go West exhibition and is co-presented and sponsored by the Film Studies Program, University of Pittsburgh. Free; Registration suggested

11.4 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: SQÜRL FEATURING JIM JARMUSCH & CARTER LOGAN: FOUR FILMS BY MAN RAY Carnegie Lecture Hall (Oakland) Co-presented with Carnegie Museum of Art. Tickets $20/$15 members and students

11.10 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: MATTHEW SHIPP TRIO WITH SPECIAL GUEST THOTH TRIO The Warhol theater Co-presented with City of Asylum @ Alphabet City Tickets $15/$12 members and students

11.14 – 10am-12pm MEMBERS HALF-PINT PRINTS The Factory Families work with The Warhol’s artist educators to create silkscreen prints during this members-only drop-in silkscreen printing activity for children ages 1 to 4 years old. Free for members; Registration suggested

Photo Greg Gorman

12.8 – 8pm Carnegie Lecture Hall (Oakland), Co-presented with Carnegie Museum of Art. Tickets $30/$25 members & students, VIP $125 (includes general admission seating and post-show meet & greet); visit warhol.org or call 412.237.8300

11.15 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: LUNA WITH SPECIAL GUEST ELEANOR FRIEDBERGER Carnegie Lecture Hall Co-presented with WYEP Doors open at 7 p.m. Tickets $25/$20 members & students

The Warhol welcomes back the legendary writer and director, John Waters, (Pink Flamingos, Hairspray, Cry Baby), to the Carnegie Lecture Hall with his critically acclaimed one-man show, A John Waters’ Christmas ;VYU IL[^LLU JHWP[HSPZT HUK HUHYJO` >H[LYZ VɈLYZ OPZ hilariously incisive take on “Christmas crazy”, spreading his subversive yuletide cheer and lunacy.

The Andy Warhol Museum receives state arts funding support through a grant from the Pennsylvania Council on the Arts, a state agency funded by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania; the National Endowment for the Arts, a federal agency and The Heinz Endowments. Further support is provided by the Allegheny Regional Asset District.

Please note this performance contains adult subject matter and strong language.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 11.01/11.08.2017


11.01/11.08.2017 VOLUME 27 + ISSUE 44

[EDITORIAL] Editor CHARLIE DEITCH News Editor REBECCA ADDISON Arts & Entertainment Editor BILL O’DRISCOLL Associate Editor AL HOFF Digital Editor ALEX GORDON Staff Writers RYAN DETO, CELINE ROBERTS Music Writer MEG FAIR Interns HALEY FREDERICK, HANNAH LYNN, JAKE MYSLIWCZYK, AMANDA REED

[ART] Director of Operations KEVIN SHEPHERD Production Director JULIE SKIDMORE Art Director LISA CUNNINGHAM Graphic Designers JEFF SCHRECKENGOST, JENNIFER TRIVELLI {COVER PHOTO BY JOHN COLOMBO/ MAKEUP BY MORRIGANA REGINA}

[NEWS]

Meet E! The Dragnificent, the 12-year-old drag queen who wants to change the way we think about gender. PAGE 06

[ADVERTISING] Associate Publisher JUSTIN MATASE Senior Account Executives PAUL KLATZKIN, JEREMY WITHERELL Advertising Representatives MACKENNA DONAHUE, BLAKE LEWIS, JENNIFER MAZZA Classified Manager ANDREA JAMES National Advertising Representative VMG ADVERTISING 1.888.278.9866 OR 1.212.475.2529

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[LAST WORD]

“I try to see the best in everybody, and she’s able to see right through their bullshit when necessary.”

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News 06 Views 14 Weird 16 Music 17 Arts 26 Events 31 Taste 34

Screen 38 Sports 40 Classifieds 42 Crossword 43 Astrology 44 Savage Love 45 The Last Word 46 NEWS

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GENERAL POLICIES: Contents copyrighted 2017 by Eagle Media Corp. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without written permission of the publisher. The opinions expressed in Pittsburgh City Paper are those of the author and not necessarily of Eagle Media Corp. LETTER POLICY: Letters, faxes or e-mails must be signed and include town and daytime phone number for confirmation. We may edit for length and clarity. DISTRIBUTION: Pittsburgh City Paper is published weekly by Eagle Media Corp. and is available free of charge at select distribution locations. One copy per reader; copies of past issues may be purchased for $3.00 each, payable in advance to Pittsburgh City Paper. FIRST CLASS MAIL SUBSCRIPTIONS: Available for $175 per year, $95 per half year. No refunds. PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 650 Smithfield Street, Suite 2200 Pittsburgh, PA 15222 412.316.3342 FAX: 412.316.3388 E-MAIL info@pghcitypaper.com

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THIS WEEK

ONLINE

“UNLEARNING GENDER MEANS BOYS AND GIRLS SHOULD EXPRESS THEMSELVES THE WAY THEY WANT TO.”

www.pghcitypaper.com

CHANGING FRAME

Vogue; strike a pose; and then check out the behind-the-scenes video from our cover photoshoot with 12-year-old drag queen E! The Dragnificent at www.pghcitypaper.com.

12-year-old drag artist E! The Dragnificent wants people to change the way they view gender

Want to see the best costumes from this year’s Bloomfield Halloween Parade? Check out our photo highlights from the 49th annual event at www.pghcitypaper.com.

{BY MEG FAIR}

CP recently reported on a racist video as part of our work with ProPublica’s Documenting Hate project aimed at collecting reports of hate crimes and bias incidents. If you’ve been a victim or a witness, tell us your story at www.pghcitypaper.com.

CITY PAPER

E! The Dragnificent

{CP PHOTO BY JOHN COLOMBO}

INTERACTIVE

Our featured photo from last week is by @raineysday11. Use #CPReaderArt to share your local photos with us for your chance to be featured next!

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 11.01/11.08.2017

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RAG QUEENS and kings perform as caricatures of gender, playing up the most extreme ends of the gender spectrum and creating larger-than-life characters who entertain through their exuberance or humor, and sometimes both. Drag artists lip-sync and perform routines that push boundaries to make crowds respond with laughter or screams of delight. The art of drag has been around since the late 19th century, but drag is part of popular culture now. Its popularity is, in part, due to the smashing success of TV’s RuPaul’s Drag Race, a highly entertaining drag competition and reality show that wrapped its ninth season this summer. In the city of Pittsburgh, there are places where you can see local and national drag performers bring the house down, be it Blue Moon, in Lawrenceville; Cruze, in the Strip; or Glitter Box Theater, in Oakland. CONTINUES ON PG. 08


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CHANGING FRAME, CONTINUED FROM PG. 06

In addition to being a space of gathering for the queer community, drag shows have been a central component of the LGBTQ civil-rights movement. Queens have been central to the revolution since its inception, leading the protests and riots in the Compton Cafeteria, in 1966, and New York City’s Stonewall Inn, in 1969, pushing back against police brutality and discrimination. Drag continues to be a place where queer folks can push boundaries, especially when it comes to gender identity. And it is in this space of gender exploration that Esai Varela, a 12-year-old drag queen who performs as E! The Dragnificent, thrives. It’s all a part of their mission to change the way people see gender. E!, a musical-theater student at the Pittsburgh Public High School for the Creative and Performing Arts, first got the itch to take up drag performance around the age of 10. “I was in a show called Come Play With Me, and I saw all the lovely drag queens there, but also knowing so many drag queens my whole life, it just made me want to do it because it looked really fun,” they say. From the time E! was walking, their mother Dre Varela confirms they were playing with traditional gender boundaries. “They were putting on my stiletto heels when they were 3. I once found a bright red pair of my stilettos under the crib, and I asked my roommate at the time if he put them there,” laughs Varela. “Then I caught Esai shuffling around in them, in nothing but pull-ups, and I was like, ‘Oh my god!’” But that’s not the only thing that defines them. E! loves comedy, is a member of the Hope Academy at East Liberty Presbyterian and is also a ukulele enthusiast. And the arts definitely run in E!’s family. E!’s father is a visual artist, and Varela is a burlesque and variety performer. When E! was 4, Varela ran a dance studio out of the home. “I had a dance studio in my house, and since I produce a burlesque and drag troupe, all my friends would be over, and we’d be rehearsing,” says Varela. “I had a roommate at the time who was a very flamboyant drag queen himself, so Esai was always around very colorful people and would get into the costumes.” E! would tag along to rehearsals all over the city dressed in princess gowns. “It had never even occurred to me that E! would want to perform in drag,” says Varela. “But [performing] is something that’s always been in his blood, and it was just what he gravitated toward.” On the Facebook page for E! The Drag-

nificent, Varela posts videos of her child in extravagant, creative costumes. In one video, E! uses a sparkly, blue bed canopy as an ornate crown and veil. “They’ve always lived in my closet, so much of what I buy ends up in theirs, and because so many of my friends also perform, E’s always getting hand-me-downs of makeup and costumes,” says Varela. “They’re really lucky!” E! has two “fairy drag fathers,” as Varela calls them, a couple living in Columbus that hand down all their costumes to E!. Additionally, other queens and dancers share looks and makeup with E!, and the queen community has also been supportive and full of advice. “They tell me to keep up my fire, and keep doing what I’m doing because it’ll all pay off, and that feels amazing,” says E!. “They’re really supportive.” And so far, that advice is ringing true. After just a few years of drag performances, E! The Dragnificent will be headlining at the Austin International Drag Festival the second weekend of November.

“YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TOO MUCH GLITTER.”

E!, WHO USES they/them

pronouns, is an active proponent of changing the way people view gender. They believe gender is a constricting construct, one that they actively push against. To fundraise for E!’s trip to Austin, the family made shirts with a photo of E! vogueing on it, paired with the message: “Let’s tell the world to unlearn gender!” “I think that unlearning gender means boys and girls should express themselves the way they want to and without people telling you, ‘You’re a girl, so you should be doing this’ or ‘You’re a boy, you should be going over here.’ It’s this big giant thing, and it’s so hard for people to feel just one way or the other,” E! says. Discussions about gender are happening all over the world. And although many indigenous people, non-Western cultures and intersex people have long believed there are more than two genders, the conversation about gender is starting to get louder in the United States. During last year’s presidential election, the topic of gender became a talking point when the candidates discussed the rights of trans people to use the bathroom that matches the gender they identify with. In early October, California became the first state to legally recognize a third gender option on official documents. And some colleges are beginning to establish preferred name and pronoun policies to ensure students are addressed correctly. In addition to debates about allowing CONTINUES ON PG. 10


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CHANGING FRAME, CCONTINUED FROM PG. 08

trans people to use their preferred restrooms, there are also conversations about ensuring public places have gender-neutral restrooms for those who exist outside of the binary male-female definitions. That’s where E! lives, and they say it can be hard to exist in a world that refuses to let you properly express yourself. Through drag, E! says they find freedom from rigid gender roles and expectations. Drag performers across the gender spectrum play with the absurdity and exaggerations of gender presentation. “[Drag] has gender in it because there are queens that are nonbinary that play a big femme personality of a woman, or it’s a man who plays a woman that has a big personality, or a woman who plays a man,” says E!. “And it all has to do with gender.” CITY PAPER SAT down with E!, in October.

With full makeup on, E! looks older than 12, carrying themselves with a sense of confidence as they donned their blue wig and shiny pink jumpsuit, covered in a thin layer of glitter. But E! also has a sweet little voice and a silly sense of humor. “You can never have too much glitter,” E! says.

On Sat., Nov. 11, in Austin, E! will be performing a Madonna montage of “Lucky Star,” “Vogue,” “Frozen” and “Hung Up.” They’ll also be performing “It’s Oh So Quiet,” by Bjork. When CP asked E! how they felt about performing at their biggest show yet, they admitted to being “nervous-cited,” a combination of excited and nervous, of course. It’s a pretty calm and measured response for a 12-year-old who is about to perform with some big-name drag stars from around the globe, including one of their favorite drag queens, Latrice Royale. “She’s very funny, and she has a great laugh that’s very long,” says E!. “She’s amazing!” “Esai is pretty naive about most things. They just have no concept that any of it is a big deal. I think it’s because E!’s been around performing all their life, and so they have no concept that this is that big of a deal,” says Varela. “They’re very lucky in that way.” When CP asked what they’re most excited about for the upcoming show, a warm smile spread across their face before they said, “I’m most excited about getting up there and performing as myself.” M E G FA I R@ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 11.01/11.08.2017


LGBTQ ROYALTY Drag queens get all the attention, but there’s more to the drag community than what’s on TV {BY REBECCA ADDISON} Next year will mark the 10th season of RuPaul’s Drag Race, a reality competition television show hosted by the world’s most well-known drag queen, RuPaul. In the time that it’s been on the air, the show has done much to thrust drag into the mainstream. And after airing on LGBTQ cable network Logo for the first eight seasons, this year RuPaul’s Drag Race made the jump to the more widely available VH1 channel. Drag Race has been nominated for and won several Primetime Emmy Awards. The lip-syncing performances and voguing that form much of the show have greatly influenced popular culture; catch phrases from the show have been added to our collective lexicon. But there’s still a lot about drag culture that many Americans don’t know. Although they receive less attention, there are large drag-king communities in cities like Pittsburgh. And there are also numerous performers that don’t identify as either kings or queens. They’re part of a growing group of performers who identify as queer kings or trans kings. “Drag queens are very much renowned, both because of RuPaul’s Drag Race and the amount of attention drag queens get in general” says Jay Mockery, a local drag performer. “There needs to be more representation of kings, so people can get to know us. I feel like there are some misconceptions about what we do.”

{CP PHOTO BY JOHN COLOMBO}

Drag King Shane Moening performing at a recent event in Pittsburgh

like to do more feminine things.” Mockery was first introduced to drag by another drag king shortly after they began dating. The king asked Mockery to check out one of his performances, the first Mockery had seen. “I was like, ‘this is super cool,’” Mockery says. “I realized it was a really cool way for me to express myself. As a drag king, I get to present myself in a masculine way. I don’t consider myself to be fullon trans, so it’s a way for me to present the masculine side of myself. I’ve always been into theater, so this is a really cool way for me to combine gender and equality

Drag kings are performers who identify as female, but who dress and perform as masculine. Trans kings are those who perform as and identify as a gender other than the one they were assigned at birth. Queer kings are those who don’t identify specifically with either end of the gender spectrum and perform as both gender representations. Mockery identifies as a non-binary person and performs as both masculine and feminine. They’ve performed songs by Nat King Cole and MKTO, but they’ve also performed songs by Ke$ha. “I like to blur the lines,” Mockery says. “While I do masculine stuff, sometimes I

“THERE NEEDS TO BE MORE REPRESENTATION OF KINGS, SO PEOPLE CAN GET TO KNOW US.”

stuff with that.” Mockery also draws a lot of confidence and strength from dressing up and performing in drag. “I’m not the most confident person,” Mockery says. “My profession requires me to have some kind of confidence, but every time I get into drag, I just have this burst of crazy amounts of confidence, where I feel like I can take on any issue.” In the year or so that Mockery has been involved in the drag community, they say they’ve noticed some misconceptions around drag kings. Mockery says some believe drag kings don’t put as much effort into their costumes and — gasp — that they don’t memorize the lyrics for their lip-sync routines. “Drag kings put in the same amount of effort as drag queens,” says Mockery. “Drag kings are known as people who don’t know their lyrics, and knowing your lyrics is Drag 101. Just like drag queens, drag kings put a lot of emotion into their performances.” Like Mockery, another local drag performer, Gabe Encounters, doesn’t fully identify with the drag-king moniker. “I identify as a trans king,” Encounters says. “Being a drag king is a female dressing up as a man and acting. But me, being transgender, I’m dressing up as myself and being myself.” Encounters was first exposed to drag this year and has been performing for four months. So far, his favorite performance was when he dressed up as professional wrestler John Cena, and he already has other costumes in the works for future appearances. “I like being on stage. I like being the center of attention. I feel more free and more masculine doing drag,” Encounters says. “And the drag community has been super open-minded and super kind to me.” RA D D I S ON @ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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sible to allow its limited resources to be used for sex-change procedures.” White said his amendment “is in line with current state regulations that prohibit the use of Medicaid funding for sex-change procedures.” But states like New Hampshire have chosen to lift the ban on using Medicaid for sexconfirmation procedures. It’s the kind of thing Sanchez would like to see implemented nationwide. Sanchez says children shouldn’t be discriminated against for wanting to embrace who they are. “This isn’t a choice,” Sanchez says. “I don’t think anyone would choose to be hated and discriminated against.” On Oct. 30, members of a statewide coalition called #paresist rallied in Harrisburg to denounce the amendment. The group included members from activism organizations such as Equality Pennsylvania, Power Northeast, SEIU Healthcare Pennsylvania, the LGBT Center of Central PA, TransCentral PA, PHAN and Make the Road Pennsylvania. “Republicans are holding hostage the 176,000 Pennsylvanian children who rely on CHIP in order to codify hate in our laws,” Adanjesus Marin, director of Make the Road Pennsylvania, said in a statement. “We will not accept any attacks on our most vulnerable, especially young kids.” Activists say the amendment is in line with nationwide attacks on health care, most evident in attempts to repeal and replace the Affordable Care Act, and the rights of citizens to make decisions about their health and bodies. “The discriminatory amendment is an attack on health care in general and part of a broader attack on transgender people,” Matthew Yarnell, president of SEIU Healthcare Pennsylvania, said in a statement. “Health-care decisions should be made by doctors, parents and youth, not Harrisburg politicians.”

REAUTHORIZING HATE Activists and elected officials say Pennsylvania’s CHIP amendment is an attack on the trans community {BY REBECCA ADDISON} FOR THE PAST few weeks, Naiymah Sanchez

has been traveling around Pennsylvania to raise awareness about an amendment, which is attached to a bill reauthorizing the state program that provides health insurance to children. As the transgendereducation-and-advocacy coordinator for the American Civil Liberties Union of Pennsylvania, it’s her job to bring attention to this issue, but as a trans person, it’s also personal. “The most important thing we can do is uplift the stories of those individuals that are going to be affected by this amendment,” Sanchez says. The amendment has been attached to the reauthorization of the Children’s Health Insurance Program. CHIP provides health-care insurance to 176,000 Pennsylvania children. The program is open to families who earn too much to qualify for Medicaid, but can’t afford to purchase coverage on their own. This year, the Republican-controlled Pennsylvania Senate attached an amendment to the CHIP reauthorization that would prohibit funds from being used for transition-related surgical services. Last week, on Oct. 25, the amendment was approved by the Senate by a vote of 37-13 and has now been sent on to the House. “It sets the tone for discrimination against people,” says Sanchez. “The most marginalized and vulnerable individuals are children, and to make any amendment to any health-care coverage that targets

{PHOTO COURTESY OF ADANJESUS MARIN}

Group of activists gathered in Harrisburg on Oct. 30.

specific communities is discriminatory. “The CHIP program is for children of low-income families. This is a tactic they’re using to attack the community.” The vote was criticized by Gov. Tom Wolf and state Sen. Jay Costa (D-Forest Hills), who voted against the amendment and called it discriminatory. Local state senators who approved the amendment include Sen. Guy Reschenthaler (R-Jefferson Hills) and Sen. Randy Vulakovich (R-Shaler). “Voting for the reauthorization of CH I P should be the easiest vote we take in this chamber. This program is so popular and so effective that we should not even need to go through this process every few years,” Costa said in an Oct. 25 statement. “But here we are, and an amendment that cruelly and blatantly discriminates against transgender children and young adults has politicized health insurance for every Pennsylvania child.” Activists say the amendment is yet

another attack on the transgender community and part of a nationwide trend. According to Human Rights Campaign, an LGBTQ advocacy organization, this year more than 130 anti-LGBTQ bills were introduced across 30 states. “Throughout the nation, the trans community is being targeted,” Sanchez says. “The trans community has been dealt low blows by our government.” The CHIP amendment was proposed by Sen. Don White (R-Indiana). Prior to last week’s vote, White posted a statement on Oct. 18 extolling the virtues of the CHIP program, but describing why he believed the amendment was necessary. “It is completely inappropriate to use state funds to pay for sex-change operations for children. I believe that is a position that is strongly endorsed by a vast majority of Pennsylvanians,” White said. “I strongly support CHIP. This program provides vital health-care services for Pennsylvania’s children. It is irrespon-

“IT SETS THE TONE FOR DISCRIMINATION AGAINST PEOPLE.”

RA D D I S ON @ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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“In order to ensure our justice system works as effectively as possible, keeping qualified, experienced judges on the bench is critical. The Allegheny County Bar Association encourages you to “vote yes” to retain these hard-working judges who have faithfully and effectively served all of us for the past 10 years.” – Hal D. Coffey, President, Allegheny County Bar Association Paid for by the ACBA Judicial Excellence Committee (PAC), a political action committee of the Allegheny County Bar Association. James Ehrman, Treasurer.

[PITTSBURGH LEFT]

CHANGING TIMES {BY CHARLIE DEITCH} I’VE BEEN working at City Paper in some capacity or another since early 2005. So, that means that this issue of CP is roughly my 616th. There are so many cover stories that I’ve loved over the years, and I definitely have my favorites (some of them even by writers other than myself). But as I sit here, two days before this issue is set to hit the streets, I can’t help but think that this is one of the most important that we’ve ever done. Given the amount of great work that this paper and its staff past and present have turned out, I don’t make that statement lightly. If you haven’t read it yet, you will soon read the story of E!, a 12-yearold drag queen who will be soon be taking the stage at the Austin International Drag Festival. Yes, that’s a huge deal. But this just isn’t a story about one performance. It’s bigger than that. It’s a story about acceptance and love and having your voice heard no matter how old you are. That story is a representation of what the future of our country looks like — a nation that is largely accepting and tolerant of an individual’s right to be who they are. Obviously, that’s not what this country is now and that’s what this piece is about. I have no doubt that in the days and weeks following this issue’s release, I will receive phone calls, letters and emails from people who are “appalled,” “shocked” and “saddened” that this child’s parents allow them to engage in drag and that this paper decided to “celebrate” that “behavior.” So, I wanted to address these emails and calls before I actually receive them in the following open letter.

same struggles, only with a lot less help and understanding. This is becoming a world where younger folks like E! don’t have to hide who they are. They don’t have to live a solitary life wondering if what they’re going through is normal, or if something is wrong with them. Unfortunately, not all kids have the support that E! has and still find themselves in a situation where they have to live in secret and handle these struggles on their own. That’s because acceptance isn’t completely the norm yet. But it will be. If you have a problem with this week’s cover story, you need to know that you are the problem. No person should have to live their life differently just because who they are makes closeminded people uncomfortable. And the more stories we tell about people like E!, the more likely it is that change will come faster. The more likely it is that our legislators will finally get off their asses and make laws that make discrimination against LGBTQ folks illegal. Millennials already know change is coming. In fact, most of them believe change is already here; the word just hasn’t yet made its way to everyone. Sure, I bust on millennials occasionally for things I find annoying, but they are the most accepting generation. A generation that doesn’t see change as an uphill battle, but rather as a necessary component of survival and progress. City Paper chose to profile an exceptional 12-year-old with a great story and an even greater worldview on gender. So maybe read it again, and approach it from that perspective. Try to celebrate E! and the other drag performers you can see featured in the issue for their willingness to live life as who they are, regardless of the criticism they may receive. Who knows? At the very least, maybe you can appreciate them for that, and that’s a start.

IT’S A STORY ABOUT ACCEPTANCE AND LOVE.

DEAR [INSERT NAME OF OFFENDED INDIVIDUAL OR SELF-RIGHTEOUS COMMUNITY GROUP HERE], Whether you want to admit it or not, the world is changing for the better, and the story of this brave 12-year-old proves that. E! is one of those children in this country who is dealing with issues of gender identity very early in their life. What makes this story so important is that E! is not handling these issues alone. They have a supportive family and the recognition and guidance of a community who have gone through the

C D E I T C H @ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 11.01/11.08.2017


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News of the Weird +

Quick-thinking paramedics in Dorset, England, saved the life of a man whose fishing outing went south when a Dover sole jumped down his throat and blocked his windpipe on Oct. 5. Sam Quilliam, 28, had just caught the 5½-inch-long fish and went to give it a kiss when it wriggled free and lodged in his throat. “I ran round the pier like a headless chicken and then passed out,” Quilliam told The Guardian. When first responders arrived, Quilliam was not breathing, but friends were performing CPR. Paramedic Matt Harrison said: “It was clear that we needed to get the fish out or this patient was not going to survive. ... I was able to eventually dislodge the tip of the tail and very carefully, so as not to break the tail off, I tried to remove it — although the fish’s barbs and gills were getting stuck on the way back up.” Finally, the fish “came out in one piece,” Harrison said. Quilliam said his brush with death won’t put him off fishing. “Once I am back at work and fit, I will probably get back at it again,” he said. Lindsey Partridge of Ontario, Canada, booked herself at a pet-friendly Super 8 in Georgetown, Ky., for the Retired Racehorse Project’s Thoroughbred Makeover on Oct. 4. At check-in, Partridge asked the front desk clerk if the pet policy included horses, to which the clerk answered, “Aw, I wouldn’t mind. You could do that.” So Partridge returned to her horse trailer and brought Blizz, her retired racehorse, into the hotel. Partridge and Blizz took a video and a few photos in the room, but eventually Partridge took Blizz to the Kentucky Horse Park, where the rooms are more suited to equine visitors. The Lexington Herald-Leader reported that Blizz took third place in the trail competition during the event.

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Meanwhile, in Iowa, a pair of women stopped at a traffic light in Altoona in October looked at the car next to them and saw a horse staring back from the back seat. “This is the most Iowa thing that has EVER happened to me,” Hannah Waskel tweeted, along with a video of the miniature horse. “We started laughing and the people driving the horse saw us and waved,” Hannah told UPI. “They even rolled the window down for the horse.”

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Malcolm Applegate, 62, of Birmingham, England, couldn’t take life with his demanding wife anymore, so 10 years ago he escaped. Applegate spent five of those years living in the woods near Kingston, until applying to live at a homeless charity called Emmaus Greenwich Center in South London, Fox News reported. “Without a word to anyone, not even family, I packed up and left ... I went missing for 10 years,” Applegate said. “I enjoyed my life,” he wrote in a blog on the Emmaus Greenwich website, but says he’s grateful to the charity for encouraging him to reconnect with his sister. As for his

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wife, there has been no reaction from her to Applegate’s reappearance.

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Residents of Rogersville, Mo., are protesting a high school fundraising plan to convert an abandoned funeral home into a haunted house, according to KY3.com, calling the idea distasteful and insensitive. The Preston-Marsh Funeral Home had been scheduled for demolition, but the owner gave permission to students from LoganRogersville High School to use it at the end of October to raise money for a safe graduation celebration for seniors. Students said they would use leftover equipment such as gurneys to enhance the spooky experience. But one Rogersville resident said doing so is “akin to opening a strip club in an old church.”

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Samantha the intelligent sex doll suffered a number of indignities at the Ars Electronica Festival in Linz, Austria, in early September. Sergi Santos of Barcelona,

Spain, who developed Samantha, said men at the show acted “like barbarians. Two fingers were broken. She was heavily soiled.” Samantha, who talks, is also programmed to react when someone touches her. Santos told Metro News that Samantha would have to undergo repairs and cleaning, but she “can endure a lot. She will pull through.”

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Metro News also reports that women in Middlesbrough, Cleveland, England, have contacted police about a mysterious man handing out provocative notes in the streets. The notes begin: “No offence intended. You are simply a female that caught my eye. ... I am looking for a possible private arrangement. If you understand my meaning.” The man has handed out several of the notes, one to a 14-year-old girl at Middlesbrough Bus Station. Her sister called the phone number at the bottom of the note and said the voice “sounded foreign.” She went on: “It made me feel a bit uncomfortable, and it set off my anxiety.”

WAYNOVISION


LISTEN AS YOU READ: SCAN THE CODE FOR OUR NEW SPOTIFY PLAYLIST, A SOUNDTRACK TO THE STORIES IN THIS SECTION, OR VISIT WWW.PGHCITYPAPER.COM/BLOGS/FFW/

NEW LOCAL RELEASES {BY MEG FAIR}

Cisco Kid BEAUTIFUL DAY TO DIE CISCOKIDPGH.BANDCAMP.COM

Cisco Kid’s sound has an easy, groovy feel to it — the kind that feels spacious and smooth and easy to sway to. This ease and coolness is the primary tone of Beautiful Day to Die, the band’s latest record. It’s a psych-tinged rock album, with a heavy dose of soulful, bluesy energy at its center. Nick Guckert’s breathy vocals move between mellow lilting and slightly gritty belting, akin to modern folksy rock acts like Dr. Dog, The Black Keys and the Avett Brothers. The instrumentals are thoughtful and very groove-oriented, opening up to make space for the occasional solo or jam. Cisco Kid manages to make the jams on this record feel fun and genuine, instead of self-indulgent or painstakingly rehearsed and plotted. You can picture the band members in a room together, with grins on their faces, excited to be experimenting musically with each other. It’s a feeling best heard on songs like “Stardust” and the album-closer “Beautiful Day to Die.” FOR FANS OF: OLD WESTERN FLICKS, DR. DOG, ’70S ROCK ORGAN

Colourshow RUN AWAY FROM EVERYTHING

Ravi Coltrane

COLOURSHOW.BANDCAMP.COM

Change can be an incredibly stressful prospect. The fear of change keeps people from leaving the home they’ve grown up in their whole lives, or the job they hate, just because the uncertainty is too much to take. On Run Away From Everything, Colourshow pushes back against that anxiety and urges listeners to take the leap, no matter how scary it seems. Colourshow crafts a sound that showcases catchy pop melodies (“Forties”) and beautiful harmonies (“And,” “Fault Lines”) over indie-rock instrumentals. The energy of the music and the vulnerability evokes the feelings of emo music, reminiscent of the energy of Into It. Over It. or The Swellers. On tracks like “How to Speak” and “Sanctuary,” Colourshow shows off its dynamic strength, an ability to play with the soft, tender sound that builds into something enormous and loud that really hits hard and leaves you caught up in the song’s emotional power. FOR FANS OF: THE SWELLERS, DRINKING 40S BY THE RIVER

NEWS

MUSICAL TRIBUTE {BY MIKE SHANLEY}

I

N A 2010 interview with Jazztimes

succeeding her mentor, Nathan Davis. The annual Pitt Jazz Seminar and Concert has been a tradition for more than four decades, bringing in renowned musicians for a week of lectures and events, concluding

magazine’s Shaun Brady, pianist Geri Allen said: “We have to be students of life and be very careful as we move through it. There’s always some kind of unexpected moment that happens each and every day, and you have to adjust. Music is like that. You can’t ever take it for granted.” Brady revisits the quote in the upcoming edition of the magazine’s Jazz Education Guide in a piece reflecting on the pianist’s legacy. Allen died June 27, at age 60, after a battle with cancer. The Detroit native received a master’s degree in ethnomusicology in the 1980s from the University of Pittsburgh. A prolific composer, performer and instructor, she had a well-established career before returning to her alma mater in 2012 to serve as director of jazz studies,

47TH ANNUAL PITT JAZZ SEMINAR AND CONCERT 7:30 p.m. Sat., Nov. 4. Carnegie Music Hall, 4400 Forbes Ave., Oakland. $30. 412-624-7529 or www.music.pitt.edu/jazz-sem for full schedule

with a blow-out concert at the Carnegie Music Hall. This year’s concert takes on a solemn note, serving as a salute to Allen, who brought new blood to the tradition.

Trombonist/composer George Lewis came to Pitt in 2016 for a series of concerts that included one in which he and Allen performed, via interactive computer software, with musicians in California. The pair continued discussing possible collaborations in the future. “She was taking the jazz studies program at Pitt in directions that were unimaginably great,” Lewis said via email back in June, “and she could do this because of her extremely open mind and her ability to understand and support diverse viewpoints, which was also why she was able to perform with the widest range of creative people. She was a creative musician of the very highest order, and our loss is incalculable.” Tenor saxophonist Ravi Coltrane, who comes to town for the Pitt Jazz Seminar, CONTINUES ON PG. 18

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MUSICAL TRIBUTE, CONTINUED FROM PG. 17

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Geri Allen

remembers Allen as a performer ready to both welcome and push musicians. “The music was always challenging, unique and creative,” he says of her music. “There was a love in there, too. She made you feel engaged and connected. And she did it all without words. It was all done with music.” Coltrane says Allen was, arguably, “more modest than she ever needed to be. She was a shy person, in many ways. It was a quiet strength. It often reminded me of my mother, her demeanor as well,” he says. “Obviously with both of them being from Detroit, and being followers of [pianists] Bud Powell, Barry Harris, there were a lot of things in Geri’s playing that reminded me of my mother’s playing.” His mother is the late pianist Alice Coltrane and his father is the late tenor saxophonist John Coltrane. The latter, one of the most revered jazz musicians of all time, died when Ravi was 2, so he never got to know him. (Alice died in 2007.) Might Coltrane be able to listen to his father on a few different levels, as a parent as well as a musical peer? He pauses thoughtfully while considering this idea. “It’s hard to articulate it. No one’s ever put it to me that way before,” he admits. “There are times that I can separate my father from John Coltrane. And sometimes those two entities kind of meld and overlap, and oftentimes, I’m admiring this incredible, creative voice. It was interesting to have that duality between the father and the musician.” One aspect of the elder Coltrane’s career was his constant drive to move forward stylistically, never resting on a current

breakthrough. His son says that when he teaches, he tries to impress that idea on young musicians. “That potential is in all of us. [My father] made that clear in that 10-year span, being a leader from 1957 to when he passed away in 1967,” Coltrane says. “The amount of growth and change in that 10-year period — it’s mind-blowing, you know? He trusted his intuition and allowed that to take him forward.” Technique can be taught, he says, but creativity is something altogether different. “That’s more like a muscle that has to be trained. Some people actually use it in a very deep and profound way — like John Coltrane. But for the rest of us, it’s something that we have to be aware of, and we should not fear tapping into it. And then we need to be courageous and patient enough to really try and cultivate it. If you start kind of falling back on your intuition more often, it actually starts to improve.” When talking about Allen’s death, Coltrane admits that he hasn’t fully accepted the idea that the pianist is no longer with us. “I almost wish that we could have had at least one moment to say, ‘Geri, thank you. We love you and thank you for everything you’ve done in music, and for all the music that you put in to the world.’” That opportunity, in a sense, will happen this week. In addition to Coltrane, Saturday’s concert includes Kenny Davis (bass), Maurice Chestnut (tap dancer), Nicholas Payton (trumpet, piano), Tia Fuller (saxophone), Stefon Harris (vibraphone), Kassa Overall & Victor Lewis (drums) and Kurt Rosenwinkel (guitar). Actress S. Epatha Merkerson serves as host. I N F O@ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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STILL MOVING {BY MIKE SHANLEY}

Pere Ubu

Pere Ubu might have paved the way for all that followed it: punk rock, noise, weird pop and anything else you’d like to add to the list. It’s also well known that the Cleveland band began as a one-time recording project that wasn’t supposed to last beyond one 1975 single. Pere Ubu is often credited for creating a unique sound that broke through the boundaries separating specific genres; that got the band labeled as musical rule-breakers. “Everybody thinks we break the rules. No, we just know the rules really well,” says vocalist David Thomas, Ubu’s one mainstay since that first record. “It just seemed like, in 1970-whatever-it-was, this is what you should be doing. We could trace a straight line from Ike Turner in 1951 thru Elvis and Brian Wilson and Velvet Underground and on and on directly to what we were putting together. We were just standing there at the bus stop, and the bus came along and we got on it.” Pere Ubu’s “avant-garage” sound continues with its newest album, 20 Years in a Montana Missile Silo. Several elements remain in place: chugging power chords; non-melodic synthesizer squalls (that once evoked thoughts of nuclear reactions gone awry); and Thomas himself, who can shift from a frantic high-pitched warble to a low, grouchy bark. Like nearly all Ubu albums, some songs sound downright beautiful, too. When asked if he has a proudest moment from the band’s history, Thomas laughs casually. “No. To me, it’s a continuous process,” he says. “Nothing in Pere Ubu is ever done, is ever finished, is ever a destination. Albums are not destinations. They’re just simply moments along the way.” He has a similarly even-keeled thought about the use of Ubu’s songs in season four of American Horror Story. “It’s appreciation. It’s a respect,” he says. “It’s like finding a dollar in the street. It’s not like finding a million dollars in the street, which would be exciting. It’s like a dollar and you go, ‘Hmm, that’s nice.’” INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

PERE UBU with JOHNNY DOWD 8 p.m. Wed., Nov. 8. Club Café, 56 S. 12th St., South Side. $30. 412-431-4950 or www.clucafelive.com NEWS

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IT’S A HOCKEY NIGHT

IN PITTSBURGH! {PHOTO COURTESY OF NICK KARP}

Fits

IS YOUR HOCKEY HEADQUARTERS

LOG JAM {BY ELI ENIS}

$LI11GHT

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IT ALL STARTED with a log from Sweden.

“I was actually DJing this very strange event at the Silent Barn,” Cummins says in a recent phone interview, referring to the famed Brooklyn arts hub that hosts any number of creative exhibits. “This giant log — like a tree-sized log that travels around the world and goes to different arts spaces — came there. We had a dance party where the DJ plugged into the log so you could only hear the music if you pressed your face into [it]. I started putting on some of my voice memos, and at one point, I’m laying down, full-body on this log, and feeling this song go all through my body.” It was that peculiar experience that inspired Cummins to start their own project, Fits, after spending years playing bass in other people’s bands. However, the band’s Nov. 17 debut All Belief Is Paradise — available via Father/Daughter Records and featuring a band made up of members from Big Ups, gobbinjr and Fern Mayo — takes on a hilariously different form from its hipster-psychedelia origins. “Once you put a guitar in my hands, for whatever reason, music gets a lot more condensed,” Cummins says. “I never set out to create a power-pop band, or a band with really short songs. That’s just how it started coming out.” All Belief, the band’s only release other than its 2016 split with Pittsburgh’s Yes Yes A Thousand Times Yes, is, in fact, a straightup power-pop record featuring short, snappy, witty, lo-fi tunes and heinously hooky songs. The record’s opener and first single, “Ice Cream on a Nice Day,” is a splendid sampling of what’s to come — a punchy bassline, Cummins’ nasally yet distinct

intonation, a brief build, and then a crash of distorted, chuggy riffage. Then, like most of the less-than-two-minute tracks on the album, it’s over and onto the next one — a style Cummins implies is a reflection of their own personality. “It’s more to do with the fact that I don’t like repeating things a lot and I get bored easily,” Cummins says. “I figure if you wanna hear something, you can hear the song a couple times.” However, as short as the tunes are, the lyrics on here — as well as the experiences that influenced the band’s inception itself — aren’t nearly as fleeting as the songs themselves.

YES YES A THOUSAND TIMES YES WITH FITS, YUCKY DUSTER AND ONE HUNDRED YEAR OCEAN 8 p.m. Fri., Nov. 9. Spirit Hall, 242 51st St., Lawrenceville. Price t/k. www.spiritpgh.com

“It’s kind of a grief album. A lot of it is wrestling with the really intense period of time after my mom passed away,” Cummins says. “One thing that’s kind of coming through for me, is it’s a lot less of looking back on something happy and missing it, and more like walking away from something really messed up, and then building your own life and being OK with it, and looking back sort of wishing you could give yourself something better.” Their mother was schizophrenic, and Cummins says that her passing was more than the death itself; it was the catalyst that allowed them to begin expressing feelings that they hadn’t previously been able to. “And that’s kind of where [the name] Fits comes from.” Fits will be playing Spirit, in Lawrenceville, on Nov. 9. I N F O@ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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Turkuaz

CRITICS’ PICKS

[FUNK AND SOUL] + THU., NOV. 02

[FOLK/POP] + TUE., NOV. 07

The color palette of the Brooklyn band Turkuaz is somewhere between a rainbow and an exploded Crayola box. Like the band itself, which clocks in at nine members, the sound is big and varied, encompassing bits of funk, soul and pop. I know what you’re thinking: Nine?! That’s just not enough musicians. Luckily, Turkuaz will be joined at the Rex Theater by the extremely listenable soul of 10-piece Houston band The Suffers. That’s enough ll game, which people for a basketball gled “how I know, because I Googled ers on many basketball players nn a court?” Hannah Lynn 8 p.m. 1602 E. Carson St., South Side. $18-22. 21 and older. 412-381-6811 or www.rextheater.net

It’s hard to believe that Regina Spektor has been making music for nearly 20 years, because she always sounds fresh and new. She’s known for her emphatic piano-playing and clear falsetto voice. Even though her sound is sweet, her songs are sweeping, layered short stories that welcome the ugly and dilapidated sides of life. She’ll play The Palace Theatre in support of her latest album, Remember Us to Life, for which I’d recommend a pack of Kleenex. HL 8 p.m. 21 West Otterman St., G Greensburg. $49.75-79.50. All ages. 7 724-836-8000 or www.thepalacetheat www.thepalacetheatre.org

[BUDDY ROCK ROCK] + WED., NOV. 08

[GLAM ROCK] + SAT., NOV. 04 I’m a sucker for anyone who looks and/or sounds like Freddie Mercury, and the modern British glam-rock group The Struts hits the spot on nd both accounts. The band ock. makes big, anthemic rock. e The stage outfits range ns, from leather to sequins, e and the members have the kind of command over the audience thatt makes everyone clap in unison, whether they like it or not. The Struts will be joined at Mr. Smalls by alt-pop duo Nightly. HL 8:30 p.m. 400 Lincoln Ave., Millvale. $20-22. All ages. 412-821-4447 or www.mrsmalls.com

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Regina Spektor {PHOTO COURTESY OF SHERVIN LAINEZ}

Ever want wanted to go to a show where all the bands were form by childhood formed frien friends? That’s pretty mu what’s going much do down at Spirit tonight. W Washington, D.Cb based Paperhaus is three childhood f friends making m moody psychedelic r rock. The Lampshades came together as teens in an Altoona basement more than 10 years ago and have been making i indie pop/rock ever sinc Local rockers since. Hon first joined Honey force in middle school forces and made it out the othe side as a real adult other band Rounding out the band. show is indie rock from Slug who don’t go as Slugss, b far back as the others, but are no less chill it HL 8 p.m. 242 51st for it. L St., Lawrenceville. $5. www www.spiritpgh.com


TO SUBMIT A LISTING: HTTP://PGHCITYPAPER.COM/HAPPENINGS {ALL LISTINGS MUST BE SUBMITTED BY 9 A.M. FRIDAY PRIOR TO PUBLICATION}

THE LAMP THEATRE. Hollywood Nights. 8 p.m. Irwin. 724-367-4000.

ROCK/POP THU 02 HOWLERS. Poppies, Paddy The Wanderer & LK Hae. 9 p.m. Bloomfield. 412-682-0320. MOONDOG’S. Indigenous. 7:30 p.m. Blawnox. 412-828-2040. MR. SMALLS THEATER. The Strumbellas. 7 p.m. Millvale. 412-821-4447. REX THEATER. Turkuaz w/ The Suffers. 8 p.m. South Side. 412-381-6811.

FRI 03 BRILLOBOX. LowDown Brass Band & MC Billa Camp. 9 p.m. Bloomfield. 412-251-6058. BROKEN PLOW WESTERN MARTIAL ARTS. Metal Masquerade: Unfurnished Evolution, Wolfblud, Chasing the Sun & DiGregorio. 7 p.m. New Kensington. 412.620.8932. GOOSKI’S. Vacation, Bat Zuppel, Swim Team, Choir. 9 p.m. Polish Hill. 412-681-1658. HAMBONE’S. Space Debacle, Bruiser Beep & Princess Jafar. 9 p.m. Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318. HOWLERS. Curse the Son, Brimstone Coven & Horehound. 8 p.m. Bloomfield. 412-682-0320.

SAT 04

HOWLERS. The Promise Hero, Sleepy Limbs, Self Help Me & Look Out Loretta. 8 p.m. Bloomfield. 412-682-0320. THE R BAR. Billy the Kid’s Steel Town All-Stars. 7 p.m. Dormont. 412-942-0882.

CLUB CAFE. Bonnie Bishop. 6 p.m. South Side. 412-431-4950. DOWNEY’S HOUSE. Trainwreck. 9:30 p.m. Robinson. JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & 412-489-5631. SPEAKEASY. Brothers Comatose, THE LAMP THEATRE. Joe Mipso, Lil Smokies. 8 p.m. Bachelor Grushecky & Houserockers Boys Showcase. 7 p.m. North Side. w/ Jeffery Gaines. 8 p.m. Irwin. 412-904-3335. 724-367-000. LOOKING FOR GROUP. Dead River, Mala REX THEATER. Sangre, Crooked The Wood Brothers. Cobras, JC Nickles. 8 p.m. South Side. 7 p.m. Brookline. 412-381-6811. 774-482-1264. www. per pa PARK HOUSE. Johnny pghcitym .co Stanec. 9:30 p.m. North Side. 412-224-2273. THE R BAR. King’s Ransom. BELVEDERE’S. NeoNoir Dark 9:30 p.m. Dormont. 80s w/ Erica Scary. 10 p.m. 412-942-0882. Lawrenceville. 412-687-2555. REX THEATER. Cabinet w/ MR. SMALLS THEATER. Satsang. 9 p.m. South Side. Centrifuge Thursdays. At the 412-381-6811. Funhouse. 9 p.m. Millvale. STEEL CITY STEAKHOUSE. 412-821-4447. The Watts Brothers. 9 p.m. PERLE CHAMPAGNE BAR. Monroeville. 412-829-2118. Bobby D Bachata. 10 p.m. Downtown. 412-471-2058.

TUE 07

FULL LIST ONLINE

WED 08

DJS

THU 02

SUN 05

CATTIVO. Sinkane w/ Shaq Nicholson. 8 p.m. Lawrenceville. 412-381-6811.

MP 3 MONDAY LOFI DELPHI

SPRING INTERNS WANTED

FRI 03 ANDYS WINE BAR. DJ Malls Spins Vinyl. 5 p.m. Downtown. 412-773-8884. BRILLOBOX. Pandemic : Global Dancehall, Cumbia, Bhangra, Balkan Bass. 9:30 p.m. Bloomfield. 412-621-4900. DEE’S CAFE. Soul & Rock-n-Roll w/ DJ Ian. 10 p.m. South Side. 412-431-1314. THE FLATS ON CARSON. Pete Butta. 10 p.m. South Side. 412-586-7644. ONE 10 LOUNGE. DJ Goodnight, DJ Rojo. 9 p.m. Downtown. 412-874-4582. RUGGER’S PUB. 80s Night w/ DJ Connor. 9 p.m. South Side. 412-381-1330.

City Paper’s editorial team is seeking several interns for the spring. Please send résumé, cover letter and samples to the appropriate editor listed below by Nov. 21, 2017. Each internship includes a small stipend. No calls, please.

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT INTERN

The position is focused on reporting and writing about local people, performances, artworks and events, in fields including but not limited to theater, visual art, literature, dance and comedy. Send a cover letter, résumé and three writing samples to arts editor Bill O’Driscoll, driscoll@pghcitypaper.com.

MUSIC INTERN

The music intern will have a working knowledge of the local music scene and experience writing reviews, previewing shows and interviewing artists. Apply to editor Charlie Deitch, cdeitch@pghcitypaper.com.

NEWS INTERN

The news intern will pitch and write stories for both the print and online editions, as well as assist news reporters with research and fact-checking. Basic writing and reporting experience required. Please send résumé, cover letter and samples to news editor Rebecca Addison, raddison@pghcitypaper.com.

PHOTO INTERN

We are looking for a student photojournalist with an artistic eye who can tell a story through images. Editorial work will include shooting assignments to supplement the paper’s news and arts coverage, both in print and online. Weekend availability is required. Send a résumé and a link to an online portfolio to art director Lisa Cunningham, lcunning@pghcitypaper.com.

SAT 04 BELVEDERE’S. Sean MC & Thermos. 90s night. 10 p.m. Lawrenceville. 412-687-2555. CATTIVO. Illusions. w/ Funerals & Arvin Clay. 9 p.m. Lawrenceville. 412-687-2157. DIESEL. DJ CK. 10 p.m. South Side. 412-431-8800. PERLE CHAMPAGNE BAR. DJ Tenova. ladies night. 9 p.m. Downtown. 412-471-2058. SPIRIT HALL & LODGE. TITLE TOWN Soul & Funk Party. Rare Soul, Funk & wild R&B 45s feat. DJ Gordy G. & J.Malls. 9 p.m. Lawrenceville. 412-586-4441.

Each week we post a song from a local artist online for free. This week, it’s “Phone,” by LoFi Delphi. It’s an irresistible ear-worm with a criminally catchy hook and bouncy rock feel. Stream or download “Phone” for free on FFW>>>, the music blog at pghcitypaper.com.

CONTINUES ON PG. 24

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CONCERTS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 23

TUE 07 THE GOLDMARK. Pete Butta. Reggae & dancehall. 10 p.m. Lawrenceville. 412-688-8820. SEVICHE. Hot Salsa & Bachata Nights. 10 p.m. Downtown. 843-670-8465.

WED 08 SMILING MOOSE. Rock Star Karaoke w/ T-MONEY. 9:30 p.m. South Side. 412-431-4668.

HIP HOP/R&B TUE 07 STAGE AE. Macklemore. Partnered with Plus1 so that $1 from every ticket goes to advance racial and social justice through the M&RL Equity Fund 7 p.m. North Side. 412-229-5483.

BLUES THU 02 O’DONNA’S. The Bo’Hog Brothers. 8 p.m. Beaver. 878-313-3418.

SAT 04 WHEELFISH. Strange Brew. 8 p.m. Ross. 412-487-8908.

JAZZ THU 02 HOTEL INDIGO. Roger Barbour Jazz Trio. 7 p.m. East Liberty. 412-665-0555.

JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & SPEAKEASY. Roger Humphries Jam Session. Ballroom. 8 p.m. North Side. 412-904-3335. RILEY’S POUR HOUSE. Jazz Happy Hour w/ Martin Rosenberg. 5:30 p.m. Carnegie. 412-279-0770.

FRI 03 ANDORA RESTAURANT FOX CHAPEL. Pianist Harry Cardillo & vocalist Charlie Sanders. 6:30 p.m. Fox Chapel. 412-967-1900. DOUBLETREE MEADOWLANDS. Roger Barbour Band. 8 p.m. Washington. 724-222-6200.

SAT 04 CARNEGIE MUSIC HALL. 47th Annual Pitt Jazz Seminar & Concert. A tribute to the late Geri Allen, former director of Pitt’s Jazz Studies program, who passed away June 27, 2017. Guest artists include: Maurice Chestnut, tap dancer; Ravi Coltrane, saxophone; Kenny Davis, bass; Tia Fuller, saxophone; Stefon Harris, vibraphone; Victor Lewis, drums; Kassa Overall, drums; Nicholas Payton, piano/trumpet; and Kurt Rosenwinkel, guitar. 7:30 p.m. Oakland. 412-624-4187. CIOPPINO SEAFOOD CHOPHOUSE BAR. Lucarelli Jazz w/ Peg Wilson. 7 p.m. Strip District. 412-281-6593. JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & SPEAKEASY. The Tony Campbell

HEAVY ROTATION

Jam Session. Speakeasy. 5 p.m. North Side. 412-904 -3335. THE MONROEVILLE RACQUET CLUB. Jazz Bean Live. 7 p.m. Monroeville. 412-728-4155.

Here’s what CP music intern Hannah Lynn can’t stop listening to:

SUN 05 CITY OF ASYLUM @ ALPHABET CITY. Joel Pace Organ Trio. 6 p.m. North Side. 412-435-1110. ROCKS LANDING BAR & GRILLE. Tony Campbell, John Hall, Howie Alexander & Dennis Garner. 7 p.m. McKees Rocks. 412- 875-5809. SEWICKLEY PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH. Jeremy Fisher Jr, Thomas Wendt, Alton Merrell & Paul Thompson. 3 p.m. Sewickley. 412-741-4550.

J. Roddy Walston and the Business

“Bad Habits”

Benjamin Booker

“Witness”

MON 06 HAMBONE’S. Ian Kane, Ronnie Weiss & Tom Boyce. Jazz Standards, showtunes & blues. 6:30 p.m. Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318.

First Aid Kit

“You Are the Problem Here”

TUE 07 RILEY’S POUR HOUSE. Jazz Happy Hour w/ Martin Rosenberg. 5:30 p.m. Carnegie. 412-279-0770.

Roy Rogers and Dale Evans

WED 08 RIVERS CLUB. Jessica Lee & Friends. 5:30 p.m. Downtown. 412-391-5227.

“Bury Me Out on the Lone Prairie”

ACOUSTIC THU 02 ELWOOD’S PUB. West Deer Bluegrass Review. 7:30 p.m. Rural Ridge. 724-265-1181.

REGGAE

FRI 03

THU 02

BEER HEAD BAR. Right TurnClyde. 9 p.m. North Side. 412-322-2337.

PIRATA. The Flow Band. 9 p.m. Downtown. 412-323-3000.

FRI 03

SAT 04 FIRST UNITARIAN CHURCH. The Young Novelists w/ The Squirrel Hillbillies. 7:30 p.m. Shadyside. 412-621-8008. VINOSKI WINERY. Strumburgh. 1 p.m. James Tyler Duo. 5 p.m. Greensburg. 724-872-3333.

SUN 05

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 11.01/11.08.2017

HAMBONE’S. Calliope Old Time Appalachian Jam. 5 p.m. Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318.

WED 08 ALLEGHENY ELKS LODGE #339. Pittsburgh Banjo Club. 8 p.m. North Side. 412-321-1834. PARK HOUSE. Shelf Life String Band. 9 p.m. North Side. 412-224-2273. WALNUT GRILL. The Eclectic Acoustics. 7 p.m. Robinson. 412-747-2100. WHEELFISH. Jason Born. 7 p.m. Ross. 412-487-8909.

WALLACE’S TAP ROOM. The Flow Band feat. Finneydredlox, Joe Spliff, Deb Star, Sam Fingers & D Lane. 7 p.m. East Liberty. 412-665-0555.

COUNTRY FRI 03

PARK HOUSE. Chet Vincent & Molly Alphabet. 9:30 p.m. North Side. r ape 412-224-2273. pghcityp

FULL LIST E ONwLwIN w. .com

SUN 05

VINOSKI WINERY. Willow Hill. 1 p.m. Greensburg. 724-872-3333.

OTHER MUSIC THU 02 LINDEN GROVE. Karaoke. 8 p.m. Castle Shannon. 412-882-8687. THE ROOTS CELLAR. Sultans of String. 7:30 p.m. Shadyside. 412-316-1915.

FRI 03 LINDEN GROVE. Elmoz Fire. 9 p.m. Castle Shannon. 412-882-8687. STAGE AE. Yonder Mountain String Band w/ The Last Revel. North Side. 412-229-5483.

SAT 04 CARNEGIE LECTURE HALL. SQÜRL w/ Jim Jarmusch & Carter Logan. 8 p.m. Oakland. 412-237-8300.

SUN 05 ANDREW CARNEGIE FREE LIBRARY MUSIC HALL. Edna Vazquez. Mexico native Edna Vazquez is a fearless singer, songwriter and guitarist whose powerful voice and original material seamlessly paint an intersection of folk, rock, pop and R&B. Hosted by The Pittsburgh Metropolitan Area Hispanic Chamber of Commerce. 2 p.m. Carnegie. 412-680-3861. CLUB CAFE. Rebirth Brass Band. 7 p.m. South Side. 412-431-4950. EAST LIBERTY PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH. Essence of Joy. A set of spirituals. 3 p.m. East Liberty. 412-441-3800.


What to do IN PITTSBURGH

November 1-7 WEDNESDAY 1

Josh Ritter & The Royal City Band MR. SMALLS THEATRE Millvale. 412-421-4447. With special guest Good Old War. All ages event. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 8p.m.

Band, Sourmash, Kaelber, Dash City Skyline & Honey. Over 21 event. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 7p.m.

Nick Offerman

THURSDAY 2

Party in the Tropics: 80’s Night

MR. SMALLS THEATRE Millvale. 412-421-4447. With special guest Okey Dokey. All ages event. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opus one. 8p.m.

Face the Music: A Battle of the Bands JERGEL’S RHYTHM GRILLE Warrendale. 724-799-8333. With special guests Chase & the Barons, Jeff Fetterman

NEWS

SUNDAY 5 BENEDUM CENTER Downtown. 412-456-6666. Tickets: trustarts.org. 7:30p.m.

Yonder Mountain String Band STAGE AE North Side. With special guest The Last Revel. Tickets: ticketmaster. com or 1-800-745-3000. Doors open at 7:30p.m.

The Strumbellas

TEMPLE SINAI Squirrel Hill. For tickets and more info visit templesinaipgh.org. 7:30p.m.

FRIDAY 35

CLUB CAFE South Side. 412-431-4950. Over 21 event. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opus one. 8p.m.

Crystal Bowersox

Jamie & Friends

MONDAY 6 REGINA SPEKTOR THE PALACE THEATRE NOVEMBER 7

Photo: Shervin Lainez

PHIPPS CONSERVATORY Oakland. Over 21 event. For tickets and more info visit CARNEGIE SCIENCE CENTER phipps.conservatory.org. 7p.m. North Side. Over 21 event. For tickets and more info visit carnegiesciencecenter. Citizen Cope org. 6p.m. CARNEGIE OF HOMESTEAD MUSIC HALL Munhall. 412-462-3444. All ages event. SATURDAY Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 8p.m. The Marriage of Figaro BENEDUM CENTER 21+ Night: Downtown. 412-456-6666. Science Maker Shop Tickets: trustarts.org.

4x4: Ephemeral Architectures AUGUST WILSON CENTER Downtown. 412-456-6666. Tickets: trustarts.org. 8p.m.

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CARNEGIE MUSEUM OF ART Oakland. Free event. For more info visit cmoa.org. 9:30a.m.

UNITARIAN CHURCH Shadyside. 412-621-8008. All ages event. Tickets: uusong space.com. 7p.m.

Through Nov. 12.

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2017 Digital Provenance Symposium

Sound Series: SQÜRL w/ Jim Jarmusch & Carter Logan

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Macklemore

STAGE AE North Side. Tickets: ticketmaster.com or 1-800-745-3000. Doors open at 7p.m.

Regina Spektor

CARNEGIE LECTURE HALL Oakland. For tickets and more info visit warhol.org. 8p.m.

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THE PALACE THEATRE Greensburg. 724-836-8000. All ages event. Tickets: thepalacetheatre.org. 8p.m.

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“EVERYTHING IS LIKE TOGETHER, COMPLETELY.”

[COMEDY]

BUSH PILOT When you think of Nick Offerman, you may first think of him as an actor, writer, comedian, voice-over artist or carpenter; you may connect him with a character he developed, like Parks and Recreation’s Ron Swanson or Fargo’s Karl Weathers. What you are not particularly likely to define him as is a philosopher. But if you see Full Bush, his comedy tour stopping Nov. 5 at the Benedum Center, that may change. The 90-minute solo performance is split between spoken standup and original “country style” songs, in which “I’ll wax philosophical about this life’s philosophy of mine, Full Bush,” Offerman says in a phone interview. The tenets of this belief system include maintaining an aware presence in daily life and interactions with others, rather than succumbing to the myriad distractions contemporary technology and priorities supply. It emphasizes finding where we connect instead of focusing on where we diverge. “There’s been a lot of wasted energy on anger these days, but we’re still going to be here. We’re still going to be neighbors,” says Offerman. “I give encouragement to hug each other.” Heady and heavy as all of this may sound, it’s presented with simplicity, warmth and humor, cloaked so kindly in entertainment that we might become enlightened without even realizing it. In the musical segments, Offerman is his own accompanist. Mostly he plays guitar, but for one song he plays a ukulele that he fashioned himself. Offerman fans know that his creativity includes a passion for craftsmanship, recently translated to the Offerman Woodshop. This Los Angeles-based shop produces fine wood pieces ranging from boxes to boats, coffee tables to moustache combs, and is another expression of the Full Bush philosophy of a considered and deliberate life that favors the hand-made over the mass-produced. “Anything can be ordered with the click of a button,” Offerman says. “What’s meaningful is when you make something for someone — food, woodworking, knitting them a scarf.” What’s also meaningful is sharing yourself through your work, and there’s no better way than through live performance. Offerman began his career on the stages of Chicago; returning to the communication that exists between audience and artist in the same room is still the pinnacle of creative expression for him. Not only is he going full bush, he’s coming full circle. INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

NICK OFFERMAN 7:30 p.m. Sun., Nov. 5. Benedum Center, 237 Seventh St., Downtown. $39.50-59.50. 412-456-6666 or www.trustarts.org

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Hug it out: Nick Offerman

{BY LISSA BRENNAN}

{CP PHOTO BY JOHN COLOMBO}

Kierra Darshell on stage

[DRAG]

WIGGED VICTORY {BY BILL O’DRISCOLL}

I

N 1993, Kierra Darshell and her drag mother, Denise Darshell, organized the inaugural Miss Tri-State All-Star Pageant, surely Pittsburgh’s first annual drag competition. In Pittsburgh, the fine art of female impersonation was then limited to gay bars, so this was a big step. Kierra had been doing drag for just four years, in clubs including Downtown’s fabled Pegasus, but was determined to take drag to a wider audience. That first pageant, held in the ballroom of the Radisson Hotel in Monroeville, went well. Miss Tri-State even survived Denise’s death, in 1995. “One of the things she said to me before she passed away was to continue on with the pageant and not to have people get involved to change the concept of what we wanted. ‘You have business smarts, you can do this. Keep the dream going, keep it alive,’” says Kierra today. “And I told her, ‘I’ll try

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 11.01/11.08.2017

to [do it] as long as I can.’” Miss Tri-State — which later relocated to a North Hills hotel and, in 2011, to Downtown’s Cabaret at Theater Square — flourished; thanks partly to the pageant, Darshell bills herself as Pittsburgh’s First Lady of Drag. But Darshell says the 25th Miss Tri-State will

MISS TRI-STATE ALL-STAR CELEBRATION 7:30 p.m. Sun., Nov. 5. Cabaret at Theater Square, 655 Penn Ave., Downtown. $30-40. www.facebook.com/tsaspageant

be the last. Rather than the usual contest, the Nov. 5 event will be a showcase for some 14 past winners donning makeup, wigs and gowns for a valedictory round of lip-syncing, dance moves and glitter-bomb attitude. Many lamented the news. Last week, for instance, when Darshell hosted a drag-

community tribute to designer and Eons Fashion Antique owner Richard Parsakian, her announcement that Miss Tri-State was wrapping drew scattered affectionate boos. “I hate to see it come to an end,” says Jennifer Warner, who won Miss Tri-State in 1996 as a Virginia-based queen and has returned to emcee most years since. “Pittsburgh is a second home to me.” But Darshell says, “I’ve always been one that believes that sometimes it’s good to stop things while it’s still going well, while we’re still on top.” Modern drag pageants date to 1972, with the founding of the Miss Gay America, in Nashville. That event remains limited to men living as men who practice female illusion; newer pageants, like Miss Continental, allow transgender contestants. Miss Tri-State is open to anyone born male. (Two smaller-scale annual events Darshell


MOZART’S THE MARRIAGE OF FIGARO NOVEMBER 4, 7, 10, 12 Disguises, surprises, and compromises

Photo: David Bachman ©

produces — the Mr. Tri-State All-Star Pageant, for drag kings, and the Miss Newcomer pageant — will continue.) Miss Tri-State included interview, evening-gown and talent categories. Winners got cash prizes of up to $800 — plus, naturally, tiara and sash — and many later won national crowns, including Shae Shae LaReese (Miss US of A), Alana Steele (Miss Entertainer of the Year) and Daesha Richards (Miss Continental Elite). Warner, who performs nationally, says that Miss Tri-State is known as a strong show with fair judging — and one that runs on time: “There is no ‘drag time’ with Kierra Darshell.” Miss Tri-State, which Darshell says routinely sells out, has been part of a changing cultural landscape. By 1997, for instance, the pageant was mainstream enough to be hosted by local TV weatherman C.S. Keys. In 2007, Darshell began staging drag showcases for the SouthSide Works shopping complex. And since 2009, reality-TV show RuPaul’s Drag Race has put drag — whose practitioners could once get arrested for doing their thing — in living rooms weekly. Darshell now produces drag showcases everywhere from The Mattress Factory to the Westmoreland Museum of American Art; recently, this ringer for Diana Ross performed at a local fundraiser for Gov. Tom Wolf. And she’s seeking a venue to continue her popular, bi-monthly Drag Brunch, held at the soon-to-close James Street Gastropub & Speakeasy. (Darshell says her drag productions are profitable, though she maintains a career in what she calls her “boy life.”) Some observers contend that, in the age of RuPaul’s Drag Race and edgier styles of makeup and costuming, classic-style pageants struggle to stay relevant. Darshell agrees that things have changed. For instance, she was taught that drag is all about “[b]eing flawless, you know, having flawless costumes, flawless gowns on, hair and makeup, shoes. Everything is like together, completely,” she says. “But now today we do see some of the young queens … who feel comfortable coming on stage with shirts on, or some jeans on.” The Legendary Misty Knight, a mentor to Darshell, adds that shows are harder to stage today, in part because drag is so widespread, with more pageants competing for talent. “There’s at least one pageant somewhere in the country every night of the week,” Knight quips. “They’ve kind of lost their sparkle.” Darshell, however, hasn’t. She’ll keep performing, minus one size-6 perk. “When I started Tri-State, I said that I would always buy myself a brand-new gown. And in 25 years, I’ve never had the same gown on for Tri-State,” she says. “So you figure, worstcase scenario, I’ve got 25 lovely gowns!”

Benedum Center pittsburghopera.org/figaro Understand Every Word! English texts projected above the stage. Tickets start at $12 412-456-6666 Season Sponsor

Tuesday Night Sponsor: Ambridge Regional Distribution & Manufacturing Center Photo: David Bachman©, taken at Carnegie Museum of Art

D R ISC OLL@ PGHC ITY PAP ER.CO M

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M C KEESPORT LITTLE THEATER PRESENTS....

Arsenic & Old Lace A COMEDY BY JOSEPH KESSELRING

NOVEMBER 10, 11, 12, 16, 17, 18, 19 Thursday, Friday & Saturday performances at 8 p.m.; Sunday matinees at 2 p.m. TICKETS ARE $15.00, $10.00 FOR STUDENTS - GROUP RATES AVAILABLE. HANDICAPPED ACCESSIBLE.

1614 COURSIN STREET • McKEESPORT • (412) 673-1100 FOR RESERVATIONS VISIT OUR WEBSITE AT WWW.MCKEESPORTLITTLETHEATER.COM

{PHOTO COURTESY OF MICHAEL LIONSTAR}

Author Yaa Gyasi

[BOOKS]

BOUND FOR HOME {BY JODY DIPERNA} In her 2016 book Homegoing (her first), author Yaa Gyasi tells the multi-layered stories of seven generations of two connected family trees. A “homegoing” can be the act of returning home to ancestral lands. In African-American religious tradition, a “home going” is also part of a funeral or burial service — a celebration of the life of the deceased, a joyous ceremony observing that person completing his or her journey by returning to the Lord, and a ritual recognizing the fullness of things.

YAA GAYASI 7 p.m. Thu., Nov. 9. Peters Township Public Library at the Bible Chapel’s South Hills Campus, 300 Gallery Drive, McMurray. $10-15 (VIP: $60). www.ptlibrary.org

As a junior at Stanford University, Gyasi herself made a homegoing to research her book. Born in Ghana, she came to the U.S with her family as a child and had made only one childhood visit since. “At first I thought I wanted to write a very different book,” Gyasi tells City Paper by phone from her home in New York. “I thought I wanted to write about a mother and a daughter, so I went to the central region of Ghana, which is where my own mother is from and where the Asante people are from.” Then she “sort of gratuitously ended up taking a trip to the Cape Coast Castle, which is where the novel began for me.” Homegoing begins on the Gold Coast,

where the British and the Dutch are buying and kidnapping African men, women and children, shipping them to America and Europe. One young woman is sold to the white slavers; we meet her when she is held in the dungeon of the Cape Coast Castle before making the dark passage to an American plantation. Her half-sister is married/sold to a British officer who runs things at the Castle. The book tells the story of one halfsister, then the other, following each line, each successive generation through 250 years and across two continents. It is a bold narrative move, as new characters are introduced and old ones are rarely revisited. “I wanted to be able to watch things, slavery and colonialism, as they shifted very gradually over time,” Gyasi says. “That it was clear to anybody reading the book how these moments in this particular time period came from those moments that came before. … I needed a structure that would allow me to stop in as many generations as possible.” Gyasi’s approach reveals her confidence in her own voice as she sometimes lyrically carries the reader along the tides of history. It is bold and fresh and enables her to tell multiple stories and give space to a multitude of voices while also guiding the reader through the destructive effect of the slave trade in Africa, the harrowing life of slaves in America, the histories of the Asantes and Fantes, the introduction of cocoa farming in Ghana, the Fugitive Slave Act of 1850, debt bondage and more. Gyasi visits Nov. 9 for a talk and signing courtesy of Peters Township Public Library. I N F O@ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 11.01/11.08.2017


COME DISCOVER WHAT’S BEYOND THE

WOODEN BOXES 412-408-2228 | 5122 BUTLER ST, 15201

VINTAGE HOME DÉCOR ANTIQUES & COLLECTIBLES GARDENING FURNISHINGS & ART KITSCHY GIFTS

{PHOTO COURTESY OF JOHN ALTDORFER}

Alex Spieth and Andrew William Smith in The Hard Problem, at Quantum Theatre

[PLAY REVIEWS]

FIGURING IT OUT {BY MICHELLE PILECKI} ARE WE JUST a bunch of genes and neu-

rons that direct our behavior? Where does consciousness come in? Those are among the questions asked in The Hard Problem, tackled by Quantum Theater in a dynamic multimedia production of Tom Stoppard’s most recent play. The slippery title also refers to the nine-year gap between plays for Stoppard, arguably the greatest playwright in the English language today. And he’s always dealing with hard problems. The Pittsburgh premiere, directed by Rachel M. Stevens, adds an intermission to the 2015 original one-act, which helps the flow and pace of this complex piece.

THE HARD PROBLEM continues through Nov. 19. Quantum Theatre at the Energy Innovation Center, 1435 Bedford Ave., Hill District. $38-58. 412-362-1713 or www.quantumtheatre.com

With Problem, the always witty and erudite Stoppard probes human nature with a mix of sex, religion, Pilates, the economic meltdown of 2007-08, and multivariate statistical analysis. In his 1993 masterpiece Arcadia, Stoppard’s 19th-century heroine posits a mathematical formula “for all the future, and although nobody can be so clever to do it, the formula must exist just as if one could.” Problem’s heroine challenges the materialistic approach, and tries to establish that “good” exists. Set over a seven-year period, Problem takes Hilary (compassionately portrayed

by Alex Spieth) from wide-eyed grad student to a brain-research lab, to a climax that questions her answers. Complicating her quest is the affable but dislikeable Spike (Andrew William Smith in suitably mean macho mode): tutor, lover, rival, asshole. Randy Kovitz (also fight consultant) mixes alpha-male financier with philanthropy as Jerry, the rich dude behind the lab. Ken Bolden captures the body language of the serious scientist as Leo, Hilary’s boss and admirer. Vinny Anand provides stereotypical comic relief and a harsh view of reality as the smart but ruthless Amal. Stoppard usually provides meaty roles for women, but Claire Hsu, Daina Michelle Griffith and Fredi Bernstein as Hilary’s coworkers do well for what little their characters offer. Grace Vensel provides a charming spark as Cathy, Jerry’s good-hearted if precocious daughter. Stevens’ remarkable design-tech team enriches the production with visual and sound effects from sonograms and brain scans to wispy rainfall and fireworks. There’s a lot to take in with The Hard Problem, and as always with Stoppard, no easy solution. I N F O @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

November 10 – 19 and November 30 –December 3 Ronald AllAn-Lindblom • Artistic Director Kim Martin • Producing Director and Sheila McKenna • Director present

KILLING TIME

YOU ON THE MOORS NOW

{BY BILL O’DRISCOLL} PEOPLE LOSING their minds over Netflix’s

Mindhunter emphasizes our deathless fascination with serial killers. Angelmakers, an engrossing new stage work from Real/ Time Interventions, explores the oftenneglected world of women who kill again.

E\ -DFżƖƁ %DFźŵŦƏV

box office 412.392.8000 or pittsburghplayhouse.com

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PLAY REVIEWS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 29

Angelmakers is no docudrama, nor a play. It’s an hour-long cabaret of nine songs, most in the voices of true-life killers. Beirut-based performer Milia Ayache sings and plays guitar, backed up by Pittsburgh musicians Zorahna, on bass, and drummer Michele Dunlap. Little links the characters Ayache channels beyond murder; co-creators Molly Rice (songwriter) and Rusty Thelin (director) eschew overarching themes, though shrine-like stage dressings and ritual business between tunes supplies atmosphere and suggests that these eight murderers warrant remembrance. As the show’s tagline goes, “Everyone deserves one song.”

ANGELMAKERS STAYCEE PEARL dance project & Soy Sos Presents

interim: THROWBACK Celebrating old and new SPdp favorites With dinner & dance performances November 17, 2017 Doors open at 6:30 PM @ Ace Hotel $50

Look for #AbovePittsburgh, photo intern Jake Mysliwczyk’s drone photography, every Tuesday on Instagram.

pghcitypaper

continues through Nov. 11. Real/Time Interventions at Aftershock Theater, 115 57th St., Lawrenceville. $20. realtimeinterventions@gmail.com

If it’s provocative to have empathy for killers, the troupe pulls it off, thanks largely to Rice’s lyrical gifts (familiar to audiences of The Saints Tour — Braddock, Real/Time’s immersive 2015 collaboration with Bricolage Production Co.). “There is a poison made of only our breath,” sing Gwen Graham and Cathy Wood, nurses’ aides who killed five elderly patients. “You think he’s gonna sing low, the devil, but he’s gonna sing high, way way high, like me,” preaches Velma Barfield, a devout Pentecostal who poisoned six, in another standout number. Other characters include Aileen Wuornos and the vampiric Countess Elizabeth Bathory (b. 1560). Rice doesn’t always match musical genre to character and time period. So while Gwen and Cathy’s theme suggests a ruminative ’80s dance hit, Janet Toppan, a nurse executed in 1938 after murdering 33 patients, gets a nervy, Jim Carroll-like rocker whose refrain goes, “I’m sorry, everybody. I’m sorry I can’t feel it.” There’s humor, too: In her country stomp, Velma notes that roach poison is “only 60 cents!” And Ayache, an arresting presence, showcases her vocal chops in the Gypsy-inflected title track, sung by Hungary’s Zsuzsanna Fazekas, who encouraged women to poison irksome family members (“I’ll show you how to make him an angel”). Angelmakers is staged in a former Slovenian social hall in Lawrenceville, freshly gutted and undergoing renovation as Aftershock Theatre. A preview performance felt a bit tentative, but I’m guessing that by the time you read this the cast will be totally killing it. DR ISC O L L @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 11.01/11.08.2017

SILLY ON SKATES {BY TED HOOVER} DID YOU EVER hear of the Razzies? They are awards given annually to the worst films of the year and were founded in 1980 specifically to “honor” the Olivia Newton-John/ Gene Kelly musical disaster Xanadu. In 2007, Douglas Carter Beane created a satirical theatrical version featuring songs from both the film and Newton-John’s catalogue, and the show became a surprise Broadway hit. Now Pittsburgh CLO presents a scaleddown version in its Cabaret space. In case you need to know, Xanadu is about Sonny, a struggling artist inspired by, and in love with, Clio, one of the nine Greek muses. Meanwhile, two of her sister muses and a property developer are on hand to thwart Sonny’s plans to open a roller disco. CLO is leading a program developing small-scale musicals for venues like the Cabaret around the country. It’s not explicitly stated that this miniaturized Xanadu is part of that process, but, at least, it’s pointing the way. Beane’s script is tricky; George Kaufman famously remarked that “satire is what closes on Saturday night,” and this production gets off to a rocky start indeed. I’ve seen the full-size version and remember just laughing and laughing at Beane’s non-stop barrage of jokes lampooning the movie, the ’80s and musical comedy itself. This go-round seems to have removed, not only a few cast members, but some jokes as well. It’s not until we’re well into the show that the humor starts flowing.

XANADU continues through Dec. 17. Pittsburgh CLO at Cabaret at Theater Square, 655 Penn Ave., Downtown. $35.75-59.75. 412-456-6666 or www.pittsburghclo.org

Once it does, though, the evening is just a lot of silly nonsense, ably directed by Kate Galvin with an enjoyably wacked cast. Olivia Vadnais is a very determined Clio/Kira; singing, dancing and roller skating (!) like a seasoned pro. Reed Allen Worth, as Sonny, has got a big set of pipes which he uses to powerful effect. Tim Brady’s turn as the real-estate baron is about as shameless, and funny, as possible. Rounding out the cast are Lara Hayhurst and, especially, Drew Leigh Williams having the time of their wicked lives playing the bitchy, hammy evil muses. Musical director Catie Brown leads a non-stop tuneful band, and Britton Mauk has created the scaled-down glitzy setting for this scaled-down show. I N F O@ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM


FOR THE WEEK OF

11.02-11.09.17 Full events listed online at www.pghcitypaper.com

{PHOTO COURTESY OF LOUIS STEIN}

Back in February 2013, it seemed ambitious: opening a comedy-only theater Downtown, with shows booked every Friday and Saturday. But Arcade Comedy Theater’s unique mix of improv, sketch and standup, plus comedy classes, caught on quickly. Today, Arcade has ushered some 50,000 spectators and students through its doors, and is adding to its total of 1,000-plus shows at the rate of up to six or seven bookings a week, up to four nights weekly. (There are even Saturday kids’ matinees.) All that tested the limits of the 75-seat Liberty Avenue storefront. “We were at capacity as far as programming was concerned,” says Michael Rubino, one of the four Arcade co-founders who direct the venue.

Starting this weekend, thanks to its landlord, the Pittsburgh Cultural Trust, the nonprofit Arcade has a new home right up the street. The Trust renovated a long-vacant storefront into two theaters, plus classroom space and a lounge, more than doubling Arcade’s capacity. Grand Opening-weekend shows include, on Nov. 3, a set by in-house improv troupe Player One; a standup showcase; and Friday Night Improv. On Nov. 4, there’s a special edition of monthly long-form-improv show Dinner With The Nolens, featuring all four Arcade directors (pictured here) and hosted by Rick Sebak; a Blue Light Special standup showcase; and Arcade Hootenanny, featuring Pittsburgh native Jon Daly (Kroll Show), who also guests on other programs throughout the weekend. Abby Fudor says she and the other three Arcade directors are paid only stipends for their “labor of love.” Popular shows like Bonus Stage and Knights of the Arcade will continue. But look for more classes, a monthly show by musical-improv duo Baby Grand, and, Rubino says, thanks to that 110-seat downstairs theater, a bump in the level of touring standup talent Arcade can attract. In fact, there’s already been one famous, if informal guest: Seth Myers, who dropped by to visit his old Chicago improv pals the Nolens.

{ART BY ANNIE WANG}

^ Fri., Nov. 3: Collage City: Memory, Experience, and Depicting Dreams

friday 11.03 ART This month at Assemble, Annie Wang wants you to dream on. The Boston-based artist and architect offers Collage ge ms, s City: Memory, Experience, and Depicting Dreams, g and an exhibit that blends photography, drawing nd all digital rendering to depict her dreams. And and month, artists and architects will be on hand to interpret visitors’ dreams live in the gallery and lead workshops on turning dreams into art; at tonight’s opening event, the internationally exhibited Wang herself will do the honors. Visitors can also help complete a large-scale dream collage. Tonight’s reception is just one attraction at Penn Avenue gallery crawl Unblurred. Bill O’Driscoll Reception: 6-10 p.m. (free). Exhibit continues through Nov. 30. 4824 Penn Ave., Bloomfield. www.assemblepgh.org

SHOPPING Pittsburgh Vintage Mixer celebrates its 10th anniversary this weekend, featuring more than 30 local and regional vintage sellers. Tonight, ticketholders get a free gift bag, a pass for Saturday’s event and enjoy early access to all vintage sellers along with beverages by

BY BILL O’DRISCOLL

Grand Opening: Fri., Nov. 3, and Sat., Nov. 4. 943 Liberty Ave., Downtown. $15-25. 412-339-0608 or www.arcadecomedytheater.com NEWS

Allegheny Wine Mixer and Espresso a Mano, pizza from A’Pizza Bademo, music by DJ MB and a drag-queen meetand-g and-greet. A portion of the weekend’s proceeds will go to Center ffor Victims, which provides services, advocacy and edu education for crime victims. Amanda Reed 6-9 p.m p.m. Also 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Sat., Nov. 4. Teamsters Temp Temple, 4701 Butler St., Lawrenceville. $15. ww www.pghvintagemixer.com

STAGE Prime Stage Theatre opens its 21st season tonight with the U.S. premiere of an adaption of Erich Maria Remarque’s 1929 novel All Quiet on the Western Front. Written by British author, actor and playwright Robin Kingsland, the 2006 play tells the story of Paul Bäumer, a teenager who during The Great War discovers horror in the trenches with his band of brothers. At the New Hazlett Theater, Scott P. Calhoon directs a cast including Connor McNelis and Stefan Lingenfelts. AR 8 p.m. Continues through Nov. 12. 6 Allegheny Square East, North Side. $12-25. 412-267-4245 or www.primestage.com ^ Thu., Nov. 9: Victor LaValle {PHOTO COURTESY OF TEDDY WOLFF}

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EVERYONE IS A CRITIC

{PHOTO COURTESY OF ARNAUD STEPHENSON}

^ Sat., Nov. 4: Gandini Juggling’s 4x4: Ephemeral Architectures

saturday 11.04 SCREEN

CRITIC: Mel

Packer, 72,

a retiree from Point Breeze

WHEN: Sat.,

Oct. 28

It’s a political event for people to come together to celebrate music and working-class struggles. Some people are here to hear some local musicians, and some are standing in solidarity with working people. I’ve been involved with a lot of social-justice struggles for 50-some years in this town, so I know everybody here. I’m here mainly to support. I’m enjoying Sweethearts of the Barricade. I’ve heard them numerous times, and I’m a big fan of theirs, and I appreciate their dedication to working-class music and writing about working-class struggles. I have 72-year-old ears, and I may not stay if it gets too loud. You asking me to do this interview surprised me the most about this. I came out here to listen to music to give support to comrades who are engaging in working-class struggle, and I didn’t expect to talk to a reporter about it. BY AMANDA REED

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 11.01/11.08.2017

CONTEST

CO

Cat Ball, The Mr. Roboto Project, Bloomfield

{P HO TO

EVENT: Black

Each year, makers, owners and fans of amateur movies gather in cities around the world to celebrate Home Movie Day. The 2017 edition of Pittsburgh’s long-running incarnation takes place at the Carnegie Library’s main branch, in Oakland. No video allowed; rather, bring in your standard 8, super 8, or 16 mm films for inspection and check-in — or else just watch them screened, for free and with care, on finely tuned projectors. Throughout the day, Orgone Cinema supplements audience offerings with selections from its own vast stash of hobbyist-made cinematic treasures. RAPHY} OTOG N PH BO 10 a.m.-4:30 p.m. (screenings at noon). MA CH A B 4400 Forbes Ave., Oakland. Free. VID DA www.homemovieday.com OF SY TE UR

Nov. 7; 7:30 p.m. Fri., Nov. 10; and 2 p.m. Sun., Nov 12. 237 Seventh St., Downtown. $12.75-159.75. 412-281-0921 or www.pittsburghopera.org

FILM + MUSIC Fans of iconic indie filmmaker Jim Jarmusch won’t be surprised that he likes to jam (musically) to the silent 1920s films of surrealist artist Man Ray. Jarmusch (Stranger Than Paradise, Dead Man) and producer and composer Carter Logan’s band SQÜRL takes the project on the road with drums, guitars and electronics. “It’s like we’re the band, but Man Ray’s the front man,” Jarmusch tells the Cleveland Plain Dealer. Tonight, as part of The Andy Warhol Museum’s Sound Series, SQÜRL visits the Carnegie Lecture Hall, accompanying Man Ray shorts “L’Étoile de mer,” “Emak Bakia,” “Le Retour à la Raison” and “Les Mystères du Château de Dé.” BO 8 p.m. 4400 Forbes Ave., Oakland. $15-20. 412-237-8300 or www.warhol.org

Relieve your fourth-grade glory days tonight at The Great Pittsburgh Spelling Bee, at Glitter Box Theater. The event was founded in 2013 by three friends to celebrate the archaic practice of spelling words sans autocorrect. The winner gets $50, and second DANCE and third place receive Juggling takes an unlikely surprise special prizes. This event partner tonight at the August is primarily for grown-ups, but Wilson Center in Gandini Juggling’s all are welcome to spell, and enjoy 4x4: Ephemeral Architectures. The drinks (both adult and non-adult) and > Sa aro t., No show celebrates intersecting paths: Four g i snacks. All proceeds will go to charity. F f v. 4: The Marriage o jugglers share the stage with four ballet AR 7 p.m. 480 Melwood Ave., Oakland. dancers, each taking the audience on a journey of Requested donation: $5-10. www.facebook.com time and space. The production, part of the Cohen & Grigsby (“great pittsburgh spelling bee 2017”) Trust Presents series, is directed by Gandini Juggling founder Sean Gandini and choreographed by Royal Ballet dancer OPERA Ludovic Ondiviela, with original music by Nimrod Borenstein. Mozart’s The Marriage of Figaro returns to Pittsburgh AR 8 p.m. 980 Liberty Ave., Downtown. $25-45. 412-456-6666 Opera for the first time in seven years tonight. The or www.trustarts.org comedy tells the tale of Figaro (bass-baritone Tyler Simpson, a Metropolitan Opera mainstay), who is in love with Susanna (soprano Joélle Harvey), a servant. However, also vying for Susanna’s attention is Count STAGE Almaviva (baritone Christian Bowers), who plans to sleep “In one year in the early part of the 20th century, the deaths with her on her wedding night. Figaro, Susanna and of 196 men in a Southwestern Pennsylvania steel mill were Countess Almaviva (soprano Danielle Pastin) team up the result of workplace accidents. This is the story of one that teach the Count a lesson. AR 8 p.m. Also 7 p.m. Tue.,

sunday 11.05


PROUDLY TATTOOING PITTSBURGH SINCE 1994!

tattoo & piercing studio

^ Sat., Nov. 4: Home Movie Day

Open Daily, 1pm-8pm walk-ins welcome, appointments recommended!

wasn’t.” Thus does Lissa Brennan, of Dog & Pony Show Theatricals, describe her new solo storytelling piece Grist From the Mill: A Murder Ballad. Brennan, an estimable writer and performer (and regular CP contributor) presents the hourlong work tonight at Black Forge Coffee House. BO 7 p.m. 1206 Arlington Ave., Arlington. Free. www.facebook.com (“grist from the mill”)

(412) 683-4320 5240 Butler St.

thursday 11.09

Pgh, PA • 15201 inkadinkadoo.net

WORDS “The beginning of anything is always the first heartbreak. Remember that. Turn off the news. Turn off the news feed. Feed yourself. You have got to eat. You have got to feel full of something.” Cameron Barnett (“Advice to Young Black Men Named Cameron, After the Election”) is one of 92 poets, many of them local, who respond to the 2016 presidential election in the new anthology Nasty Women & Bad Hombres (Lascaux Editions). Tonight’s release party, at Tiki Lounge, features readings by some 20 poets, including Barnett, Ellen McGrath Smith, Sarah Williams-Devereux and Leslie McIlroy. BO 7-9 p.m. 2003 E. Carson St., South Side. Free. www.facebooks.com (“nasty women bad hombres”)

WORDS According to Pulitzer Prize-winning author ^ Sat., Nov. 4: The Great Pittsburgh Spelling Bee Anthony Doerr, “If the literary gods mixed together Haruki Murakami and Ralph Ellison, the result would be Victor LaValle.” LaValle reads tonight at the University of Pittsburgh Graduate School of Health Auditorium as part of the Pittsburgh Contemporary Writers Series. The author of The Ecstatic, Big Machine, The Devil in Silver, and The Changeling, LaValle has received a Whiting Writers’ Award, a United States Artists Ford Fellowship, a Guggenheim Fellowship, and the key to Southeast Queens. AR 8:30 p.m. 130 De Soto St., Oakland. Free. 412-624-6508 or www.pghwritersseries.wordpress.com

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DE

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ON

THE GUMBO, SMOOTH AND SMOKY, WAS EXCELLENT

POKE BOWLS {BY BILL O’DRISCOLL} Poke bowls have become a thing, but Downtown is home to perhaps Pittsburgh’s lone spot specializing in the sushi-like cuisine. Pittsburgh Poke, which opened in June, serves variations on this traditional Hawaiian dish built around raw fish, cubed and seasoned. It’s fast, healthy and not too pricey, but the numerous ingredient options take forethought. For lunch one day last week, customers, including me, paused to review handy “create-your-own” cards before addressing the friendly servers behind a buffet-style stainless-steel table. Choose a base (white or brown rice, quinoa or organic mixed greens), two proteins (I went with salmon and spicy tuna), mix-ins (carrot, mango, avocado, etc.), a sauce and other toppings. Most options are no extra charge beyond the basic $10.99 (or $12.99 for two proteins). There are also two house bowls and two house sushi burritos. In my poke (“POH-keh”) bowl, the warm rice and cold toppings blended nicely, and the mix of house sauce and spicy mayo was pleasingly tangy. (Other proteins include chicken, shrimp and tofu; sauce options include ginger sesame, eel sauce, citrus ponzu, spicy miso and sweet wasabi.) Pittsburgh Poke, open 11 a.m.-7 p.m. Monday through Saturday, seems to do steady lunch business — mostly takeout, though several small tables are available. The interior is bright and cheerful, the lone anomaly being the piped-in contemporary-country radio.

{CP PHOTO BY VANESSA SONG}

Jambalaya, and chicken and fries

SOUTHERN SPOT

DRISCOLL@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

{BY ANGELIQUE BAMBERG + JASON ROTH}

500 Liberty Ave., Downtown. 412-338-2199 or www.pittspoke.com

the

FEED

No shame in not ng the carving orative decorative pkin you pumpkin put out on the d to waste iit, when h you stoop. But no need can harvest the seeds. Cut into the gourd, remove and clean seeds. Toss in a bath of melted butter and salt (or other seasoning). Spread on parchment-lined baking sheet and bake, tossing occasionally, at 300 F for about 45 minutes.

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L

OCATION, LOCATION, location — that

famous triumvirate of real-estate virtues — is not quite so unambiguous when it comes to restaurants. Absolutely, b being in or near a campus, shopping disttrict or other heavily trafficked area can b be a boon, keeping even mediocre establlishments in business far longer than we’d o otherwise expect. On the other hand, we’ve jjourneyed to remote outposts to partake o of great grub, and judging by the success o of some out-of-the-way restaurants, we’re n not the only ones willing to do so. In other words, location matters, but quality counts. We wondered how these factors stacked up at Buford’s Kitchen, a Southern-accented tavern on Fifth Avenue, across from PPG Paints Arena. The location — busy when the Pens or an arena performer are in town,

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 11.01/11.08.2017

but beyond the outskirts of the Downtown dining zone — seemed challenging, and the featured cuisine is one in which diners tend to prize authenticity.

BUFORD’S KITCHEN 1014 Fifth Ave., Uptown. 412-281-2583 HOURS: Daily 11 a.m.-9 p.m. PRICES: $7-17 LIQUOR: Full bar

CP APPROVED There was no hockey the night we went to Buford’s, but a concert at the arena resulted in a crowded dining room. Management, we learned, deals with this by setting some limits on the menu. To get event-goers in and out swiftly, neither build-your-own burgers nor Buford’s

signature shakes are available on event nights. We were a bit let down about the shakes — we were saving room for the “Chocaholic,” made with devil’s food cake, for dessert — but since there were a halfdozen burger- and chicken-sandwich options on the regular menu, we still had plenty to choose from on that front. Still, our BBQ burger, topped with sauce and bacon, seemed a victim of the concert rush. Sauce was haphazardly applied, leaving part of the brioche bun — which was glossy with butter — drenched in sauce while the rest of the sandwich was barren. The texture of the burger was fine, and it was suitably cooked to order, but the seasoning was scant, such that even salty bacon wasn’t enough to render it satisfyingly savory. Pizza, another pub standard, was avail-


able in both build-your-own and pre-set versions, and it was good. The crust was chewy and yeasty at the edges, and crispy under the toppings. These consisted of a typical assortment of meats and veggies, but there was also a premium tier including andouille sausage, shrimp and pulled pork. Speaking of andouille, the Southern-inspired items on the menu are, more specifically, New Orleans style: po’ boys, gumbo, jambalaya, blackened shrimp and so on. A number of items promised big flavor, but we could have used a bottle of Crystal hot sauce on the table. Buford’s fried green tomatoes are the hearty, cornmeal-crusted style (as opposed to the lighter golden-battered), which was a good match for remoulade and scallion aioli drizzled on top. The crust was nice and crunchy, and the big, sweet-tart flavor of the tomatoes shone through, enhanced by the creamy sauces. Our other starter was soft-pretzel sticks with pimento cheese. The richness of this tangy Southern dip was cut, just enough, by the vegetal peppers. The pretzels were soft and chewy, but also super-greasy, as if brushed with butter before heating. A fried-oyster po’ boy had a similar flaw: the buttery roll was simply too much for the filling of oysters, lettuce, tomatoes, pickles and mayo. Once we inverted the sandwich and removed the bottom half, the proportions balanced out, and the plump, briny shellfish took center stage, where they belonged. Angelique indulged in both gumbo and jambalaya, rounded out by green-chile cornbread that was shockingly good. In a town where sweet, cakey cornbread is the norm, Buford’s produced one that, while not as lean as true Southern skillet cornbread, was neither sweet nor gummy, and the chile added mild, pleasant kick. The gumbo, smooth and smoky, was also excellent. A spoonful of rice, scattered on top of the bowl just before serving, kept it from turning to mush in the rich umber broth. Angelique felt she could have eaten a gallon of this, and nothing else, for dinner and been happy. Buford’s jambalaya was a Creole-style “red” preparation with a deep, dark, tomatoey sauce studded liberally with andouille, shrimp, ham and chicken. Onions, peppers and seasonings rounded out the flavors of this filling, paella-inspired Louisiana classic. At its best, Buford’s can compete on even footing with other local Southernstyle restaurants. On a more lenient scale of places to dine before an arena event, Buford’s is solidly above average, with friendly, attentive service accompanying food that was overall tasty and satisfying. INFO@ PGHC ITY PAP ER.CO M

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NFL Sunday Ticket! WE Show all Games!

[PERSONAL CHEF]

BOURBON OATMEALRAISIN COOKIES {BY TRICIA COHEN AND LISA GRAVES} Established in 1795, Jim Beam is one of the oldest food brands in America. The Bohm family came from Germany and settled in Kentucky. They changed their surname to Beam and began producing a whiskey (bourbon) originally called Old Jake Beam Sour Mash. The corn grown in Western Pennsylvania and Kentucky created a sweet and flavorful whiskey that quickly generated high demand. By 1830, Jim Beam was shipping its product in burnt-out, used fish and vinegar barrels. Sounds gross, but by burning those barrels, the company created the perfect smoky storage for what is now known as Kentucky bourbon. This recipe for bourbon oatmeal-raisin cookies takes advantage of those smoky flavors, and it’s simple; no need for a stand mixer.

ARCHrIsEo’Sn

On Ca WING

NIGHT! 50 ¢ wings Mon-Th urs 23 flavors!

2328 32 28 EAST 28 E EA Carson C STREET 412.481.0852 • archiesoncarson.com

MON to SAT 11A - 9P | SUN 4P - 9P 5865 ELLSWORTH AVE, 15232 | 412.441.4141

WW WWW.SENYAIPGH.COM WWW W W SENY S NY Y AIPG A PGH G H CO COM M

Fresh, Seasonal, Local

INGREDIENTS • 1½ cups raisins • ⅓ cup good-quality bourbon, plus a little extra to taste • 1½ stick butter, melted • ¾ cup brown sugar, packed • ½ cup white sugar • ½ tsp. cinnamon • 1 large egg, plus 1 large yolk, beaten together • 1 tbsp. molasses • 1 tsp. vanilla • ½ tsp. baking soda • ¾ tsp. salt • 1 cup all-purpose flour • 3 cups old-fashioned oats

1910 New Texas Road 724.519.7304 eightyacreskitchen.com

The Downtown lunch café you’ve been waiting for…

INSTRUCTIONS Combine the raisins and bourbon in a bowl, and set aside for at least 30 minutes. In a large mixing bowl, combine the butter, both sugars and cinnamon. Stir well. Add the eggs, and mix well. Add the molasses and vanilla. Now, add the dry ingredients, one at a time, starting with the baking soda and salt, then the flour, followed by the oats. After all the ingredients are well mixed, add the bourbon-soaked raisins, along with any remaining liquid in the bowl. Stir. Cover the bowl with plastic wrap and pop it in the refrigerator until chilled, about one hour. Heat oven to 375 degrees F. Prepare your cookies on a lined baking tray. We suggest making them into balls, and then flatten them slightly with your hands or the back of a spoon. Cook until golden. Depending on size of the cookie, bake for 12-17 minutes.

PHONE IN YOUR LUNCH ORDER OF $30 OR MORE BY 11:30AM AND

SAVE 10% *Does not apply to catering, grubhub, postmates, or Eat24 orders.

SANDWICHES WRAPS SALADS SOUPS CATERING COFFEE 808 Penn P Avenue A - IIn Th The C Cultural lt l Di District ti t HOURS: HOURS 412-745-2233 WWW.CAFE808PGH.COM 7 AM to 2 PM Mon. - Fri.

I NF O @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

Tricia Cohen and Lisa Graves are the authors of A Thyme to Discover: Early American Recipes for the Modern Table. www.thymemachinecuisine.com WE WANT YOUR PERSONAL RECIPES AND THE STORIES BEHIND THEM. EMAIL THEM TO CELINE@PGHCITYPAPER.COM.

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MEXICAN RESTAURANT & BAR

OAXACAN CUISINE

s

HAPPY HOUR Wednesday - Friday 5PM-7PM

Half Off s! Appetizer

[ON THE ROCKS]

MATCH GAME Pairing wine and cheese is easier than you think {BY DREW CRANISKY}

WE CATER!

LET S GET ’

S CIAL

BELIEVE IT OR NOT (and I still don’t), the holiday season is right around the corner. With parties that need throwing, menus that need planning, and stress that will surely need alleviating, there’s no better time to learn a bit about wine and cheese. A well-chosen wine-and-cheese pairing is a guaranteed crowd-pleaser. I sat down with Alix Hoylman of Wheel & Wedge to get some pairing pointers.

Match intensities. Balance is crucial to any pairing. “The only goal is to have a cohesive flavor at the end: something new that is created,” says Hoylman. “So you don’t want one to outshine the other.” For instance, a crisp white wine, such as a pinot grigio, would play well with young fresh cheeses like ricotta or chèvre. Cabernets and other full-bodied reds, however, require cheeses with more oomph: Think bold aged cheddars or pungent blues.

Consider the classics. “Think about flavors you put together in your normal life, and apply that to pairings,” advises Hoylman. Classic combinations that work well in the kitchen will also be successful in your pairings. Thinking about berries and cream might lead you to pair a fruity Beaujolais with a buttery brie. Or the allure of sweet and salty could bring you to one of Hoylman’s favorite pairings: Sauternes and blue cheese.

)ROORZ XV WR ƓQG RXW ZKDWōV KDSSHQLQJ @PGHCITYPAPER Ř FACEBOOK.COM/PITTSBURGHCITYPAPER

Think regionally. Terroir, the unique way that a region’s climate and soil affect taste, is an important

concept in both cheese and wine. Since the wines and cheeses of a particular region have evolved side by side for decades or centuries, choosing both from the same area will often lead to complementary pairings. Chianti, for instance, is a natural fit with an Italian sheep’s-milk cheese.

Temperature matters. Temperature affects how we taste, and that perfect pairing will fall flat if your cheese is too cold. “Straight out of the fridge, everything is going to be dull,” explains Hoylman. She recommends taking cheese out of the fridge an hour before you serve it.

If all else fails, reach for the bubbly. Dry sparkling wines like Champagne and Cava are easy go-tos. “No matter how the flavor profiles go, the bubbles help break up the fat in your mouth and kind of clean it up,” explains Hoylman. “If you don’t know what to do, just grab a bottle of Champagne and some cheese and it will be great.” Offdry Rieslings are similarly cheese-friendly, with a fruitiness and acidity that complement a variety of styles.

There are no “correct” pairings. Of course, the perfect pairing is the one you like, so don’t be afraid to experiment. And think beyond wine: Hoylman has found great pairings with beer and even cocktails. To learn more, stop by Wheel & Wedge (3337 Penn Ave., Lawrenceville) or attend one of Hoylman’s upcoming classes. www.wheelandwedge.com I N F O@ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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BOOZE BATTLES {BY CELINE ROBERTS}

Each week, we order the same cocktail at two different bars for a friendly head-to-head battle. Go to the bars, taste both drinks and tell us what you like about each by tagging @pghcitypaper on Twitter or Instagram and use #CPBoozeBattles. If you want to be a part of Booze Battles, send an email to food-and-beverage writer Celine Roberts, at celine@pghcitypaper.com.

THE DRINK: SCOTCH: SWEET AND BITTER

VS.

DiAnoia’s Eatery

Apteka

2549 Penn Ave., Strip District

4606 Penn Ave., Bloomfield

DRINK: Godfather INGREDIENTS: Famous Grouse scotch, Lazzaroni amaretto, lemon OUR TAKE: The sweeter notes of scotch are highlighted by the floral components of the lemon and nutty, warm flavors of the amaretto. Citrus lingers on the nose of the cocktail, while the apricot notes of the amaretto provide a platform for the scotch to mellow.

DRINK: Fernet, scotch, apple cider INGREDIENTS: Fernet Branca, scotch, apple cider OUR TAKE: Bitter, medicinal and bracing mint are the first flavors that surface in this well-balanced scotch cocktail. Dry cider adds sweetness and depth to the salinity of the scotch, while the dehydrated orange garnish adds visual appeal.

This week on Sound Bite: The history of home winemaking in Pittsburgh, with Ronald Casertano, of Consumer Fresh Producer Winemakers. www.pghcitypaper.com

One Bordeaux, One Scotch, One Beer Undead Goon, Barrel-Aged Imperial Stout, Spoonwood Brewing Company $13/22 oz. Mike Potter, editor-in-chief and founder of online beer magazine Black Brew Culture, has a hometown favorite, thanks to an experiment from Spoonwood Brewing Company. Undead Goon is the result of Spoonwood’s roasty imperial stout, Dead Goon, spending a year aging in Four Roses bourbon barrels. Undead Goon is perfect for Halloween drinking. RECOMMENDED BY MIKE POTTER, BLACK BREW CULTURE

Undead Goon is available at the Spoonwood Brewing Company, Bethel Park.

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AMONG THE APES

SOME HORRORS ARE UNCHALLENGED BY MODERN MEDICINE OR FAMILY COHESION

{BY AL HOFF} Most people know Jane Goodall for her lifelong work studying chimpanzees in Africa, but Brett Morgen’s new biographical documentary Jane relates the quite fascinating story of how the young British woman came to the job six decades ago, and how remarkably her life unfolded from there.

Jane Goodall, in Gombe

CP APPROVED

Goodall was a 26-year-old secretary with no scientific degree or training, and that was precisely why she was chosen for the project: to watch chimp behavior in the wild with no preconceived ideas or bias. Once encamped in Gombe, Tanzania, Goodall was determined “to get close to the chimpanzees, to live among them, to get accepted.” Goodall narrates the film, which makes fantastic use of gorgeous color photography shot by renowned nature documentarian Hugo van Lawick, in the early 1960s. (The film incorporates material from 100 hours of film previously thought to be lost.) From sweeping vistas of verdant jungle and close-ups of colorful insects, to mischievous antics of both man and ape around camp, the footage conveys a keen eye for an appreciation of the natural world. (Van Lawick and Goodall later married, and van Lawick’s affection for Goodall appears evident in his “routine” depictions of her scientific studies; the camera literally loves her.) The footage shows Goodall in all her determined and patient splendor — clambering up trees and hills, peering through binoculars, dutifully keeping notebooks of charts and sketches. All the low-tech work of sitting and watching pays off: Goodall discovers that the chimps make and utilize tools (for eating insects); the discovery continues the funding for the camp; and her life’s work is begun. Jane would make a good companion piece to 2015’s hit Hidden Figures. Like Goodall herself, the film is a gentle but firm account of a woman succeeding in a man’s world; of being diminished for her gender (the mid-century media often described her as a “girl” or wrote about her legs); and of having to find a balance between family and career. There were struggles, surely, but how it was worth it for the young woman who lived her dream of being the “strange white ape” among chimps. Starts Fri., Nov. 3. Manor

Colin Farrell and Barry Keoghan

HEART OF THE MATTER {BY AL HOFF}

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with a disturbing image — an offputting close-up of some glistening blob of pulsating viscera. It’s only when the camera pulls back slowly that it’s revealed to be a human heart — set off by medical clamps and carefully tended to by a surgeon. It’s a relief — the horrific is rendered normal and affirming — but viewers should expect the opposite trajectory in Yorgos Lanthimos’ new slo-mo psychological horror film. The normal will be zoomed in on until it’s revealed to be horrific. And few normal institutions merit more admiration than the perfect uppermiddle-class American family. The Murphys live in a luxe suburban home. Dad Steven (Colin Farrell) is a heart surgeon; mom Anna (Nicole Kidman) is an ophthalmologist; 14-year-old Kim (Raffey Cassidy) is in the school choir; and tween son Bob (Sunny Suljic) has “great hair.” But almost immediately, something feels off. Outside of work, Steven is meeting a teenage boy named Martin (Barry Keoghan), and the unexplained encoun-

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ters feel both intimate and forced. (It doesn’t help that Steven’s go-to for casual talk revolves around wrist-watch bands.) Part of this is due to the intentionally flat delivery of all the dialogue. But the story gradually reveals that, in fact, things are not well, and a mid-film medical crisis acutely lays bare the shaky morality underpinning the family.

THE KILLING OF A SACRED DEER DIRECTED BY: Yorgos Lanthimos STARRING: Colin Farrell, Nicole Kidman, Barry Keoghan Starts Fri., Nov. 3

CP APPROVED I’ll say no more — see for yourself, though viewers should be cautioned that this film isn’t for everyone. Lanthimos made 2015’s dystopic dark comedy The Lobster, which polarized folks, and viewers could find this film more challenging still. It’s slow, light on plot, and set on dismantling a number of institutions held sacred. (The “sacred deer” of the title refers to

the Greek myth of Iphigenia.) But it’s a nervy work, exhilarating in its refusal to be more accommodating. The actors are great, with both Farrell and Kidman nailing the tricky space between affectedly bland and seething with dangerous repressed emotions. The real breakout performance is by Keoghan, the young Irish actor who earlier this year portrayed the sweet anxious teen on the fishing boat in Dunkirk. In Deer, he is an exposed beating heart in human form — unmoored, unsettling and strangely powerful. Even when his full story is revealed — and he even cops to being a metaphor of sorts — Martin’s icy fury doesn’t undermine the character’s pathos. For those with a darker sense of humor and an affinity for Lanthimos’ style, there are some wry moments of humor, including the film’s outrageous denouement. There’s an amusing bizarreness to this baroque, primal story playing out in the gleaming sterile hallways of a big-city hospital or in the Murphy’s just-so living room. But some horrors are truly inescapable, unchallenged by modern medicine or family cohesion. A HOF F @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM


FILM CAPSULES CP

for days, and also functions nicely as a satiric take on our current obsession with true crime as entertainment fodder. Starts Thu., Nov. 2. Hollywood (AH)

= CITY PAPER APPROVED

REPERTORY

NEW

GHOSTBUSTERS. It’s been more than 30 years since this crisis broke, but it seems we’re still no safer from pesky ectoplasm. Well, you know who to call! This popular 1984 comedy from Ivan Reitman explains it all. 7:30 p.m. Wed., Nov. 1. AMC Loews Waterfront. $5

ALL I SEE IS YOU. Gina (Blake Lively) and James (Jason Clarke) are a married couple living in Bangkok, Thailand. (We know this because the screen tell us so, but this film will take place in some alternate space where there are only Anglo people.) Gina is blind — we know this because director Marc Forster immediately and frequently engages in those swirly, psychedelic “visions” that help movie-viewers understand visual impairment. James is a doting husband, except he’s also showing signs of being secretive or controlling or not liking dogs. When Gina undergoes an operation that restores her sight, the “happy” relationship appears to unravel. It also seems to up Gina’s kink meter. The film is baffling, seemingly setting up every giant clue about something terrible happening, while only creating a lot of confusion. It ratchets up a fair amount of tension and red herrings, but then peters out with a very limp conclusion. (Al Hoff)

MOTHER. Joon-ho Bong’s 2009 drama depicts a woman who seeks to absolve her son of an alleged murder charge by finding the real killer. In Korean, with subtitles. Nov. 3-4 and Nov. 6-9. Row House Cinema OKJA. In Joon-ho Bong’s recent film, a girl keeps a large friendly beast as a pet, but springs into action when the animal is taken by a large corporation. Nov. 3-9. Row House Cinema

Tragedy Girls

A BAD MOMS CHRISTMAS. The gang is back, and now it’s how much wine do they need to get through the holidays? Kristen Bell, Mila Kunis and Kathryn Hahn are back in Jon Lucas and Scott Moore’s raucous comedy. BLADE OF THE IMMORTAL. This samurai actioner from the prolific Takashi Miike is fairly straightforward, once you account for the hero, who isn’t quite dead yet. Manji (Takuya Kimura), a legendary samurai, is killed, but then a witch doctors him with “blood worms,” which effectively keep him from dying, despite gruesome injuries. He meets a young orphaned girl named Rin (Hana Sugisaki), and the two of them buddy-up to take on a series of violent gangs. There’s so much double-crossing that by the film’s end, virtually everybody has fought everybody else. So if you’re here for lots of sword work, acrobatic fighting and gruesome amputations, leavened by some wry humor and fantastic costumes, you’re at the right place. In Japanese, with subtitles. Starts Thu., Nov. 2. Hollywood (AH) EX LIBRIS: NEW YORK PUBLIC LIBRARY. The latest documentary essay from Frederick Wiseman (National Gallery, In Jackson Heights) spends time in a worthy and much-used institution, today a place of digital knowledge as well as many, many books. Bonus: Library card-holders get free popcorn. 6 p.m. nightly Nov. 2-5, at Melwood. 3 p.m. daily, Nov. 4-5, at Regent Square GOODBYE CHRISTOPHER ROBIN. This origin tale, directed by Simon Curtis, about the muchbeloved children’s books about Winnie-thePooh toggles between charming and clunky, affecting and cloying. It begins in the sad aftermath of the Great War, when writer A.A. Milne (Domhnall Gleeson) is having trouble readjusting after his military experience. He leaves behind the glitter of 1920s West End London for a retreat in the country. It is there, while occasionally functioning as the primary parent for his young son, Christopher Robin (Will Tilston), that Milne begins to spin tales of the boy’s toy animals. (The guardianship of Christopher falls mainly to his nanny, portrayed by the always welcome Kelly Macdonald; Margot Robbie is miscast as the not-verysympathetic flapper-y mother.) There are scenes that work, such as when Milne connects perfectly with his precocious

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THE HOST. Joon-ho Bong’s 2006 film deftly mixes comedy with eco-horror, when a polluted waterway gives rise to a man-eating monster. In Korean, with subtitles. Nov. 3-9. Row House Cinema PITTSBURGH HOME MOVIE DAY. Bring out your dead … film stock. Supply your own home movies (8, Super 8 and 16 mm), or just stop by to see what treasures others have unearthed. Noon to 4 p.m. Sat., Nov.4. Carnegie Library Main Branch, 4400 Forbes Ave., Oakland. Free. www.homemovieday.com THE TOXIC AVENGER. In this 1985 cult-classic update on the age-old myth of the little guy’s revenge, a mild-mannered janitor is transformed by a load of toxic waste into a superhero, albeit a dripping and disgusting-looking one. Midnight, Sat., Nov. 4. Row House Cinema

Blade of the Immortal

Okja

lively boy in flights of fancy in the woods, or the disappointment and betrayal Christopher experiences when this private made-up world is mined for public acclaim. (An extended sequence during which Christopher suffers mightily through numerous PR stunts to promote the books made me feel terrible for having ever enjoyed them.) But the film’s set-up and bookended final act are poorly constructed to mine maximum melodrama, a tone that is at odds with this film’s gentler, sweet and even bittersweet passages. (AH)

out — and how acutely it has changed them. The film is best when it keeps the drama small-scale, but a subplot with Solo and some local criminals feels a bit forced. And Thank You manages to find the line between public-service announcement about PTSD, indictment of well-meaning but meager services provided by the Veterans Administration, and emotionally charged drama. It may not be the best movie ever about these collateral costs of war, but it’s a good starting point. (AH)

THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE. Being in war is hard, but so is re-adjusting to civilian life when service is over. Jason Hall’s drama is adapted from the eponymous book by journalist David Finkel. The story focuses on three men, all buddies who served in Iraq during the surge; the film opens when a mission goes horribly wrong. But the much-anticipated homecoming has its own problems. Billy (Joe Cole) discovers his girlfriend has left him, and quickly spirals downward. Solo (Beulah Koale) can’t wait to re-enlist, which is likely an attempt to put off facing the hard reality that he is suffering likely traumatic brain injuries. The seemingly most adjusted of them, Adam (Miles Teller), is nonetheless uneasy around his wife and young children; he’s jumpy, plagued with nightmares and unfocused. Everything has changed but in ways the men have trouble understanding or articulating. The film follows them through about a year’s time, as the returning vets come to terms with what happened to them in Iraq — beside the day-to-day grind, there was the mission gone bad, the emotionally devastating details of which are gradually laid

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THOR: RAGNAROK. Taika Waititi, New Zealand director of low-key oddball films, is at the helm of this latest CGI-heavy action-filled chapter in the Thor (and assorted Marvel buddies and villains) saga. Chris Hemsworth stars as the mighty hammerwielder. In 3-D, in select theaters. Starts Fri., Nov. 3 TRAGEDY GIRLS. Tyler MacIntyre directs this dark horror comedy about two high school besties who are obsessed with serial killers and murder. So obsessed that they have their own blog, Tragedy Girls. So obsessed that they start killing people in their small town, if only to drive traffic to their blog. Sadie (Brianna Hildebrand) and McKayla (Alexandra Shipp) are otherwise exemplary teenage girls — they are polite to their parents, and are cheerleaders and on the prom committee. Their ability to turn on a dime between bloodthirsty and school-spirit peppy is a hoot. The film moves quickly, nimbly bouncing from joke to severed head to shouted hashtag; it also stars Josh Hutcherson and Jack Quaid, and features Craig Robinson in an extended cameo. Tragedy Girls not for everybody, but for fans of offbeat, tasteless comedies, this is a better one. It’s got girl power

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V FOR VENDETTA. John McTeigue’s intentionally provocative 2005 film is a dark conspiracy thriller about one man’s quest to bring down the government, so that a more enlightened model may take its place. 6 and 8:45 p.m. Sun., Nov. 5. Row House Cinema THE HITCH-HIKER. While better known as an actress, Ida Lupino was the rare woman who directed a few features way back in the day. One of them was this lean 1953 noir about two men who pick up an escaped convict. In a distinct lack of appreciation for the ride, the man promises to kill them once he has reached his destination. The film stars Edmond O’Brien, Frank Lovejoy and William Talman. 7 p.m. Sun., Nov. 5. Hollywood BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY’S. Blake Edwards’ 1961 film is, at its heart, still Truman Capote’s simple tale of the rootless nature of America’s then-impending future. Audrey Hepburn stars. 7:30 p.m. Tue., Nov. 7. Tull Family Theater, Sewickley KAIROS DIRT AND THE ERRANT VACUUM. Madsen Minax’s new feature film follows a queer middleschool lunch lady through her various encounters with lovers, co-workers, psychics and so on. There are also dreams, alternate space-times and wanton desires, so set your sights accordingly for a film that won Best Feature at the Indie Memphis Film Festival. 7 p.m. Wed., Nov. 8. Melwood THE WIZARD OF OZ. If your viewings of Victor Fleming’s 1939 musical film have been via TV only, you owe it to yourself to see this beloved family classic on the big screen. Join Dorothy (Judy Garland) and her little dog, too, on their unforgettable journey to the Land of Oz — a wondrous place that, ultimately, isn’t quite as wonderful as Kansas. 7:30 p.m. Wed., Nov. 8. AMC Loews Waterfront. $5

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“A LOT HAS CHANGED IN THE HOT-YOGA WORLD.”

HISTORY LESSONS This week in Pittsburgh Sports History {BY CHARLIE DEITCH} NOV. 2, 1946 Pittsburgh’s “love affair” with pro basketball begins when the Pittsburgh Ironmen play their first game in the newly formed Basketball Association of America. The team would lose the game, at St. Louis, and pretty much keep on losing for the rest of the season, going 15-45. The Ironmen lasted one season; in 1949, the league would merge with the National Basketball League to form the NBA.

Heading into a game against Notre Dame on Nov. 6, the Pitt Panthers football team is ranked No.1 in the nation by the Associated Press. It remains the last time the team received that designation. Pitt ended the season ranked 10th, and since then has risen only as high as No. 7.

NOV. 2, 2014 The Steelers retire jersey No. 75 in honor of Steel Curtain legend Mean Joe Greene during Sunday Night Football.

NOV. 3, 1960 Pittsburgh Pirates hurler Vern Law is awarded the National League Cy Young Award. Law finished the season 20-9 with an ERA of 3.08. He threw an amazing 18 complete games. He was also an All-Star and pitched two winners in the World Series to lead the Pirates to victory over the Yankees.

NOV. 4, 2013 Pitcher Francisco Liriano becomes the first Pirate to win Major League Baseball’s Comeback Player of the Year award.

NOV. 5, 1904 The Pittsburgh Professionals are selected to join the International Professional Hockey League, the first completely professional hockey league. The sport was largely an amateur pastime until then.

NOV. 5, 1976 The Pirates trade catcher Manny Sanguillen to Oakland for the services of manager Chuck Tanner. It was just the second time in MLB history that a manager was traded.

NOV. 7, 2006 Former Steelers wide receiver Lynn Swann is soundly defeated by Ed Rendell in the Republican Swann’s run for governor.

The Pittsburgh Professionals Hockey team

NOV. 2, 1982

{CP PHOTO BY JAKE MYSLIWCZYK}

It’s getting hot in here.

TEMPERATURES RISING {BY REBECCA ADDISON}

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T’S A LITTLE before noon on a Friday at

Yoga Factory Pittsburgh. One by one, a mix of men and women shuffle into the studio, heated to 105 degrees. No, it’s not an exceptionally hot summer day in midAugust, and no, the heating isn’t broken. The 105-degree temperature is purposeful. According to instructor Angelica Daniele, it’s the perfect temperature for practicing hot yoga. Bikram yoga, also known as hot yoga, was popularized in the 1970s. In Pittsburgh, Yoga Factory, previously known as Bikram Yoga Pittsburgh, has been offering the classes for nearly a decade. “The heat adds a whole other layer to things because the room is heated to above your normal body temperature,” Daniele says. “It’s very much a mental practice; people find it reduces their stress. Each posture is designed to open up different parts of your body, to stretch certain organs that don’t often get stretched. It serves as a de-

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toxifying mechanism. It serves as a safer environment to stretch.” Until recently, Bikram was the only kind of yoga offered at Yoga Factory. But as the studio has grown, instructors there decided it was time to add new offerings. “A lot has changed in the hot-yoga world, and while we as a studio believe that Bikram is what will always be the most therapeutic form of yoga, we do understand that students have other needs and wants and curiosities,” Daniele says. “There are so many studios in the Pittsburgh area, and we understand that students want variety. Most of our students enjoy the other classes.” The newer class offerings include a highintensity interval training yoga class, a vinyasa fusion class that incorporates a variety of yoga styles, and a Yoga Jamz class that features music and less verbal instruction. Yoga Factory also offers a restorative class that Daniele calls “a zen-style yoga.”

“It’s meant for deep stretching and deep meditation,” Daniele says. “You definitely feel refreshed like you just had a nap.” Yoga Factory’s regular classes consist of 26 postures and three breathing exercises. “It’s about opening your spine and building strength flexibility and balance. It’s always the same class, always the same postures,” Daniele says. “It allows you to really check your progress. You can really watch your body change over time.” There is now also an intermediate class for those who want to expand their practice. And these aren’t the only changes at Yoga Factory. The studio has plans to expand and open a rooftop deck for outdoor classes. Right now, yoga enthusiasts can contribute to their expansion through a GoFundMe campaign; it hopes to open the deck next summer. RA D D I S ON @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

www.gofundme.com/yogafactorypgh


[THE CHEAP SEATS]

the only name on the list that makes you hungry.

BRAND NAMES {BY MIKE WYSOCKI}

3. Mars Fightin’ Planets

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The town has an unusual name and the team committed to it. When you play Mars, you play the entire planet. There’s a cool logo to boot; it’s probably one of the only schools that can sell merchandise to out-of-towners.

HE HISTORIC Western Pennsylvaylva-

ague nia Interscholastic Athletic League ees — the WPIAL for short — oversees competitive sports at more than 170 stschools across, to no one’s surprise, Westls ern Pennsylvania. Each of these schools is unique, especially when it comes to itss d team name; some are unique in a good way and some in a bad way. For example, the worst has to be the Indiana Little Indians. Not only is the term politically incorrect, but the school named its team after children. That has to also be the least-intimidating name of any team this side of the Washington Prexies (which is plural for Prexy, which is a completely unnecessary synonym for “president”). There are also a lot of very ordinary and traditional team names. There are tons of Tigers, Panthers, Spartans, Vikings, Cougars, Eagles, Warriors and way too many teams named Indians. But a few schools had the foresight to take an unusual team name and not play it safe. I admire their moxie. Here’s my list of the 10 best team names in the WPIAL.

10. Ambridge Bridgers There are easily a couple thousand bridges across Western Pa., but only one school in the conference shows these structures proper respect. With so many bridges and waterways, maybe we are the Venice of Appalachia, not the Paris. It’s a fitting team name that fits perfectly with the Beaver County town’s history.

9. Avonworth Antelopes This is a great team name. Almost any team named after an animal goes for a predatory one. That’s why we see a plethora of tigers, lions and bears. But Avonworth chose an animal known for its speed and grace. The school is also known for producing Mercury Morris; he was a Pro-Bowl running back on the 1972 Miami Dolphins team that won the Super Bowl and went undefeated. His teammates still celebrate that accomplishment every year when the last undefeated NFL team loses.

8. Armstrong River Hawks Our area is known for its abundant rivers, and Armstrong is the only school to incorporate that into its name. A river hawk is a threat on land or water. It’s just a unique, solid name.

2. Butler Golden Tornado One of the great non-plural names of all time. Better than a shower, a tornado is an unstoppable and unpredictable force. The name is similar to my favorite alltime college- team name, the Marshall Thundering Herd. Golden Tornado alums include former Steeler Terry Hanratty, ex-big-league pitcher Matt Clement and Andre the Giant’s arch enemy, Big John Studd.

1. Steel Valley Ironmen 7. Western Beaver Golden Beavers Middle-school giggles aside, the school did manage to get the word “beaver” into its name twice. Well done, sirs or madams. The beaver is an overworked and underappreciated animal, and kudos to Western Beaver for finding a golden one and putting it in the limelight.

KUDOS TO WESTERN BEAVER FOR FINDING A GOLDEN BEAVER AND PUTTING IT IN THE LIMELIGHT.

It’s as tough sounding and Pittsburgh as it gets. You have the words “steel” and “iron” right in there. Even the female athletes are Ironmen. Both Luke Getsy and Charlie Batch quarterbacked their way through Steel Valley on the way to the pros. Of all the names in the WPIAL, this one is simply the best.

6. Carmichaels Mighty Mikes This might be a small school, but it is not afraid to claim its might. The name is a simple and unique play on the Greene County town’s name. Either that or they’re named after a Dutch darts champion who uses the same moniker.

5. Greensburg Central Catholic Centurions Any team named so specifically is OK by me. This name describes a professional officer in the Roman army. The name alone forces you to look up ancient Roman history. Not only that, but it’s one of the most athletically successful high schools not only in the WPIAL, but in the state.

4. Canon McMillan Big Macs This isn’t a corporation selling its product through athletic advertising. However, that day will sadly surely come; I’m sure a certain restaurant chain would love to put a cheeseburger on this team’s helmet. Until then, enjoy the name for its uniqueness and for being

M I K E W YS OC KI IS A STA NDUP CO MEDI AN . FO LLO W HI M O N TWI TTER: @IT SMIK E WYSO C K I

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER

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Allegheny Clinic seeks Obstetrician/Gynecologist to work in Pittsburgh, PA, & provide medical care related to pregnancy and/ or childbirth as well as diagnose, treat, & help prevent diseases of women, particularly those affecting the reproductive system. Send CV & cover letter with salary requirements and references to: Carla Halverson, chalvers@wpahs.org, subject line “Obstetrician/ Gynecologist” opportunity.

Allegheny Clinic seeks an Internal Medicine Physician to work in Pittsburgh, PA, to diagnose & provide non-surgical treatment of diseases & injuries of internal organ systems. Resumes to: Hilary Seben, Supervisor, Talent Acquisition Operations, 30 Isabella St., Pittsburgh, PA 15212, Hilary.Seben@ahn.org.

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Announcement Andrew M. Gross, Esquire, 707 Grant Street, Suite 2340, Pittsburgh, PA 15219. Notice is hereby given that Articles of Incorporation-Nonprofit were filed with the Department of State of the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania with respect to a nonprofit corporation which has been incorporated under the provisions of the Nonprofit Corporation Law of 1988. The name of the nonprofit corporation is 4 human kind, Inc.

OFFICIAL ADVERTISEMENT

THE BOARD OF PUBLIC EDUCATION OF THE SCHOOL DISTRICT OF PITTSBURGH Sealed bids will be received in the Office Of The Chief Operations Officer, Room 251, Administration Building, 341 South Bellefield Avenue until 11:00 A.M. prevailing time November 14, 2017 and will be opened at the same hour for the purchase of the following equipment and supplies:

Interscholastic Athletic Supplies Refuse Container Service General Information regarding bids may be obtained at the Office of the Purchasing Agent, Service Center, 1305 Muriel Street, Pittsburgh, PA 15203. The bid documents are available on the School District’s Purchasing web site at: http://www.pghboe.net/pps/site/default.asp Click on Bid Opportunities under Quick Links. The Board of Public Education reserves the right to reject any and all bids, or select a single item from any bid. We are an equal rights and opportunity school district. Parent Hotline: 412-622-7920 www.pps.k12.pa.us

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{BY BRENDAN EMMETT QUIGLEY / WWW.BRENDANEMMETTQUIGLEY.COM}

ACROSS 1. Geronimo’s people 7. Still life fruit 11. Straight 14. Mindlessly copy 15. Maker of the Ektorp sofa 16. Calendario period 17. “Heavens to Murgatroyd!” 18. Some next level shit 20. Pitch that runs along the side of a webpage 22. China’s biggest online commerce company 23. War game pieces 27. Cheerios 28. Not from around here 29. Some next level shit 32. Easter eve 34. Irish dance 35. 3Ls of yesterday 38. Where el sol rises 39. Verbal faux pas 41. It can hold water 42. Daisy’s “Star Wars” character 43. Angels pitcher Felix 44. Some next level shit 46. Toy from Europe 48. Thorny plant 49. Tech company that’s still somehow a thing in “Blade Runner: 2049”

52. Brainiac 54. Show with the Central Perk coffeehouse 57. Some next level shit 58. It borders Bolivia and Peru 60. Sikh’s cover 64. With 67-Across, blackjack winner 65. “American Horror Story” actor Peters 66. Scumbag 67. See 64-Across 68. Strong-smelling 69. Took no risks

DOWN 1. Call from the PD 2. Apple ___ 3. Messi’s nat. 4. Strabismus 5. Actor Bob of “Brazil” 6. Leaded gas 7. Pen name 8. Creole veggie staple 9. Zoo favorite 10. Dough that can yield a lot of bread? 11. Gem measure 12. The second blank in Carrie ___ ___ (“Dancing With The Stars” judge) 13. Concession stand purchases 19. StubHub’s owner 21. Collector’s coup 23. “Real Time” host

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24. “You whupped me” 25. Like river bottoms 26. Microsoft tablet 30. Holding official 31. Hardly trivial 33. Pulitzer Prize winning author James 35. Whitaker who will be the next Doctor Who 36. Part of a Buddhist title 37. Like taskmasters 40. The first blank in Carrie ___ ___ (“Dancing With The Stars” judge) 41. Fired shells on, as enemy trenches

MUSIC

43. Brother product 45. Off the beaten path 46. Unoccupied 47. Boozer’s sound 49. G# 50. Small hint 51. Singer whose fans are called “Claymates” 53. “Of course!” 55. Green room tantrum thrower 56. Arsenal owner Kroenke 59. Squid defense 61. Get down on one’s knees, say 62. Zoo favorite 63. Approving motion {LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS}

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FOR THE WEEK OF

Free Will Astrology

11.01-11.08

{BY ROB BREZSNY}

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): In the early stages of Johnny Cash’s development as a musician, his mother hired a coach to give him singing lessons. But after a few meetings, the teacher counseled him to quit the instruction. Johnny’s style was so unique, the seasoned pro thought it better not to tamper with his natural sound. I hesitate to offer you comparable advice, Scorpio. I’m a big believer in the value of enhancing one’s innate talents with training and education. On the other hand, my assessment of your destiny between now and October 2018 impels me to offer a suggestion: It may be useful for you to give some credence to the perspective of Johnny Cash’s voice coach. Make sure you guard and revere your distinctiveness.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): I used to nurture a grudge against Tony Pastorini. He was the high school math teacher who kicked me out of the extracurricular Calculus Club because my proofs were too “intuitive and unorthodox.” The shock of his rejection drove me away from a subject I had been passionate about. Eventually, though, I came to realize what a good deed he had done. It would have been a mistake for me to keep specializing in math — I was destined to study literature and psychology and mythology — but it took Pastorini to correct my course. Now, Sagittarius, I invite you to make a similar shift of attitude. What debt of gratitude do you owe a person you have thought of as a source of frustration or obstruction?

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): In the lore of ancient Greek mythology, the god Prometheus stole fire from his fellow deities and sneakily gave it to us humans. Before our patron provided us with this natural treasure,

we poor creatures had no access to it. As I gaze out at your possibilities in the coming months, Capricorn, I foresee you having Promethean inclinations. Your ability to bestow blessings and spread benevolence and do good deeds will be at a peak. Unlike Prometheus, however, I don’t expect you’ll get into trouble for your generosity. Just the opposite!

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Here’s a parable you may find useful. An armchair explorer is unexpectedly given a chance to embark on an adventure she has only read and dreamed about. But she hesitates on the brink of seizing her opportunity. She asks herself, “Do I really want to risk having ragged reality corrupt the beautiful fantasy I’ve built up in my mind’s eye?” In the end she takes the gamble. She embarks on the adventure. And ragged reality does in fact partially corrupt her beautiful fantasy. But it also brings her unexpected lessons that partially enhance the beautiful fantasy.

get your yoga on!

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “A game of chess is usually a fairy tale of 1,001 blunders,” said chess grandmaster Savielly Tartakower, a Pisces. “It is a struggle against one’s own errors,” he added. “The winner of the game is the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.” I think this is excellent counsel during the current phase of your astrological cycle, Pisces. It’s time to risk bold moves, because even if they’re partly or wholly mistaken, they will ultimately put you in a good position to succeed in the long run. Here’s a further point for your consideration. Remember the philosopher Rene Descartes’ famous dictum, “Cogito ergo sum”? It’s Latin for “I think, therefore I am.” Tartakower countered this with, “Erro ergo sum,” which is “I err, therefore I am.”

ARIES (March 21-April 19): America’s Civil War ended in 1865. A veteran from that conflict later produced a daughter, Irene Triplett, who is still alive today and collecting his pension. In the coming months, I foresee you being able to take advantage of a comparable phenomenon, although it may be more metaphorical. Blessings from bygone times, perhaps even from the distant past, will be available to you. But you’ll have to be alert and know where to look. So now might be a good time to learn more about your ancestors, ruminate exuberantly about your own history, study the lives of your dead heroes and maybe even tune in to your previous incarnations.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20):

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schoolhouseyoga.com

“I wasn’t in the market to buy a Day-Glo plastic fish from a street vendor,” testified a witty guy named Jef on Facebook, “but that’s exactly what I did. The seller said he found it in someone’s trash. He wanted 50 cents for it, but I talked him up to a dollar. The best part is the expression on the fish’s face. It’s from Edvard Munch’s ‘The Scream.’” I bring this testimony to your attention, Taurus, because I feel it’s good rolemodeling for you. In the coming days, I bet you won’t know exactly what you’re looking for until you find it. This prize may not be highly valued by anyone else but you. And it will amuse you and be of use to you in just the right ways.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Where are Chinese gooseberries grown? In New Zealand. What is a camel’s hair brush made of? Squirrel fur. When England and France waged their Hundred Years’ War, how long did it last? 116 years. When do Russians celebrate their October Revolution? In November. Trick answers like these are likely to be a recurring theme for you in the coming weeks, Gemini. That’s why I advise you to NOT be a Master of the Obvious.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): In accordance with the astrological omens, I rec-

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 11.01/11.08.2017

ommend you indulge in any or all of the following exercises. 1. Dedicate an entire day to performing acts of love. 2. Buy yourself flowers, sing yourself a song, and tell yourself a story about why you’re so beautiful. 3. Explain your deeply felt opinion with so much passion and logic that you change the mind of a person who had previously disagreed with you. 4. Make a pilgrimage to a sacred spot you want to be influenced by. 5. Buy a drink for everyone in a bar or cafe.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): “Dear Rob: I saw a photo of you recently, and I realized that you have a scar on your face. I hope you don’t mind me telling you it resembles an ancient Mayan hieroglyph that means ‘Builder of Bridges for Those Who Are Seeking Home.’ Did you know this? If so, do you think it’s an accurate title for what you do? — Renegade Leo Scholar.” Dear Scholar: Thanks for your observation. I don’t know if I fully deserve the title “Builder of Bridges for Those Who Are Seeking Home,” but it does describe the role I’m hoping to play for Leos. The coming weeks will be an excellent time for your tribe to clarify and cultivate your notion of home.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Author Clarissa Pinkola Estés encourages us to purge any tendencies we might have to think of ourselves as hounded animals, angry, wounded victims, leaky vessels aching to be filled, or broken creatures yearning for rescue. It so happens that now is a perfect time for you to perform this purgation. You have maximum power to revise your self-image so that it resounds with more poise, self-sufficiency and sovereignty.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): I used to scoff at people who play the lottery. The chance of winning big is almost nil. Why not invest one’s hopes in more pragmatic schemes to generate money? But my opinion softened a bit when the planet Jupiter made a lucky transit to an aspect in my personal horoscope. It really did seem like my chances of winning the lottery were unusually high. I started dreaming about the educational amusements I’d pursue if I got a huge influx of cash. I opened my mind to expansive future possibilities that I had previously been closed to. So even though I didn’t actually get a windfall during this favorable financial phase, I was glad I’d entertained the fantasy. In alignment with current astrological omens, Libra, here’s the moral of the story for you: Meditate on what educational amusements you’d seek if you had more money. Meditate on death not as the end of physical life, but as a metaphor for shedding what’s outworn. In that light, what’s the best death you’ve experienced? Freewillastrology.com

GO TO REALASTROLOGY.COM TO CHECK OUT ROB BREZSNY’S EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES AND DAILY TEXT-MESSAGE HOROSCOPES. THE AUDIO HOROSCOPES ARE ALSO AVAILABLE BY PHONE AT 1-877-873-4888 OR 1-900-950-7700


Savage Love {BY DAN SAVAGE}

I am a pretty handsome gay (I have been told), and I am dating a gorgeous man. I am 34, and he is 31. I am bottom only, and he is top only — so it’s a good match. He seems sincerely interested in me, and we are talking about being together. But here is the thing: He noticed that I have a rather small penis. I am under the average, and his dick is quite big and long. Since he discovered this, he fancies about “humiliating” me about my “small peepee.” He would even like me to show it to his friends. I am not ashamed of the size of my penis because it’s how I am made, and I can’t change it. But I wonder what this idea means for him. I would somehow understand that he would put me down if he suffered from a “small dick complex,” but since he is so well-endowed, I don’t get it. Is it a common turn-on for some top guys to imagine that their partner is smaller than them? Does it hide something else maybe? HUMILIATED OVER TACKLE

P.S. English is not my mother tongue. I apologize for this. I don’t have a problem with your English — it’s doubtless better than my [insert your mother tongue here] — I have a problem with your potential boyfriend. Small-penis humiliation (SPH) is a kink popular enough to have spawned a porn genre. There are more than 76,000 SPH-themed porn videos on XTube — and XTube is just one of the various porn tubes out there ruining everything for everyone. Over at PornHub, there are SPH videos with more than two million views. That’s all anecdote, not data, HOT, but it’s anecdote enough to confirm that, yes, small-penis humiliation is definitely a thing. And it can be a very good thing for guys whose erotic imaginations transformed their anxieties about having small dicks into a kink they enjoy. But you are not one of those guys. You like your dick fine, and you’ve got the exact right attitude about your dick — indeed, all men everywhere, regardless of size, should embrace their dicks the way you’ve embraced your own. Your dick is your dick, you can’t change it, and you shouldn’t be ashamed of it. And big or small, HOT, your dick has all the same nerve endings as that big and long thing on the guy who might be your boyfriend someday (but who’s definitely a presumptuous asshole right now). As with most kinks — bondage, cuckolding, foot fetishes, diapers, pup play — subs/bottoms are way more common than Doms/tops. So it’s usually the guy with the small dick who initiates small-penis humiliation games with his partner, HOT, not the boyfriend with the bigger dick and/or the girlfriend with the pussy and/or the bigger dick. (Some women have dicks, all women can purchase strap-ons.) While there are SPH tops out there — just as there are bondage tops (half of whom are frustrated bondage bottoms) — their numbers are far smaller. But the issue here isn’t stumbling over a rare small penis humiliation top in the wild, HOT, but whether or not you’re into it. Are you into power play? Do you like being degraded? Does the thought of this dude ordering you to

show your dick to his friends — friends who presumably want to see your dick — turn you on in any way? If the answer is no, no and FUCK NO, then tell your potential new boyfriend to stop making fun of your cock. If the answer is maybe, maybe and maybe under the right circumstances, then talk it over with him and work out when, where and how you’re willing to indulge his SPH kink. If you stay with him, you’re also going to need to have a conversation about consent. SPH isn’t something you surprise someone with. Like most kinks, it requires advance discussion, the setting of limits and the consent of both parties. It’s worrisome that this guy didn’t bother with obtaining your consent in advance, HOT, and if he doesn’t recognize that he made a mistake and swears not to make a similar mistake in the future, well, then you’ll have to DTMFA. I am in a relationship with a lovely and amazing man. Everything could be really good, if only his father would stop being a creep. He’s constantly telling me how beautiful, smart and attractive I am. Last year around Christmas, I sang a few songs when we were visiting my boyfriend’s family, and his father commented that I have an “erotic” voice. A few days later, I received an email from him. Attached was a poem about my singing, where he called my voice “angelic” and “pure.” It made me really uncomfortable, and I told him that I don’t want to receive poems from him and that he should stop complimenting me all the time. He didn’t. When I told him again to stop commenting on my appearance, he responded that I must like myself very much. I talked to my boyfriend’s mother, and she said she’s “given up” and ignores her husband’s behavior. It turns out that he behaved similarly with ex-girlfriends of my boyfriend’s brothers. I’m so angry and don’t know what to do. My boyfriend supports me, but it’s hard to talk about the topic, because it’s his father.

I AM NOT ASHAMED OF THE SIZE OF MY PENIS.

FUCKING ANNOYED THAT HE ENGROSSES RIGHTFULNESS

I’m curious what your boyfriend’s “support” looks like, FATHER. Does he tell you privately that his father is a creep and that he wishes his dad would knock this shit off? Or does he tell his father directly that he’s being a creep and insist he knock it off? The latter is support, the former is not. I’m thinking there’s a reason your boyfriend’s brothers only have ex-girlfriends — you don’t speak of any currents, FATHER, a highly revealing detail — and it’s not just because their dad is a creep. It’s because no one in the family is willing to stand up to this creep. Not his wife, not his children. If your boyfriend refuses to run interference and/or shut his father down, I would advise you to join the list of exes. However “lovely and amazing” your boyfriend might be when you two are alone, if he’s useless in the face of his father’s sexual harassment, you’ll have to DTMFA too. On the Lovecast, Minneapolis mayor Betsy Hodges: savagelovecast.com.

SEND YOUR QUESTIONS TO MAIL@SAVAGELOVE.NET AND FIND THE SAVAGE LOVECAST (DAN’S WEEKLY PODCAST) AT SAVAGELOVECAST.COM

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HAIL TO THE QUEEN {BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

OUTLANDISH, WILD and extremely fashion-forward, Pittsburgh drag legend Marsha Monster Mellow and her alter-ego, Mark Wilkes, have been tearing up the local drag scene for more than 20 years. City Paper recently sat down with the pair to get their take on drag, shopping and 4 a.m. trips to Primanti’s. HOW DID YOU TWO MEET? MARSHA: Mark and I met while we were working in a Jewish kitchen. We had to fight through the fumes and the alcohol just to earn our monthly keep! MARK: Exactly. I was a little gay boy going to public school when I saw these New York club kids profiled on the Joan Rivers show. So, some friends and I forged some signatures, got fake IDs, and we took a little field trip to the [notorious New York nightclub] Limelight. I hadn’t really discovered drag yet, but I was a club kid. HOW DID MARSHA AND THE DRAG SCENE BECOME A PART OF YOUR LIFE? MARK: I started feeling her presence. Being 16 and going to New York was such an eye-opener. I had to figure out who I was. So back in Pittsburgh, I started using my ID to get into [former dance club] Metropol, and I discovered the Pegasus [a legendary Pittsburgh LGBTQ club]. Around that time, I felt like I was more of a drag queen. MARSHA: I’m all about the attitude; especially in the early days I wanted to do things that were a little more, you know, scandalous. But I was also political and did things like the March on Washington. We were just this little gay girl and scared little gay boy who turned into the fabulous Marsha Monster Mello, the drag queen who cares. MARK: I made so many mistakes in my life, but I’m grateful that Marsha was there for me. She helped me get through the college of life. It’s been an education. MARSHA: Mark and I are twins. My volume is just turned up more. WORKING IN DRAG REALLY PUTS YOU INTO THE PUBLIC EYE. DO YOU BOTH THINK MUCH ABOUT HOW YOU’RE RECEIVED BY OTHER PEOPLE? MARSHA: I don’t care. Mark does. MARK: She used to care. MARSHA: Yes, but that went away. Do you know what I realized about those people? They don’t love you, they don’t fuck you, and they don’t pay your bills. MARK: We’re a good team. I try to see the best in everybody, and she’s able to see right through their bullshit when necessary.

{CP PHOTO BY JOHN COLOMBO}

Two-for-one: Marsha Monster Mellow

MARSHA, ARE YOU INTO HORROR FLICKS? WHAT ARE SOME OF YOUR OTHER INTERESTS? MARK: She’s definitely more well-rounded. She’s more into music. MARSHA: I love spending time at Jerry’s Records, talking to Jerry. I needed a turntable, so I went there. I’m a yinzer at heart. I love to shop local and support our local merchants. I stay off of places like Amazon because I look at shopping as my cardio! MARSHA, YOU MENTIONED BEING A YINZER. WHAT OTHER YINZER ACTIVITIES DO YOU PARTAKE IN? MARK: She loves Primanti Brothers.

“WE WERE JUST THIS LITTLE GAY GIRL AND SCARED LITTLE GAY BOY WHO TURNED INTO THE FABULOUS MARSHA MONSTER MELLOW.” MARSHA HASN’T BEEN AROUND THE DRAG SCENE FOR A WHILE. ARE YOU TAKING A BREAK? RETIRING? MARSHA: These days I like to pick and choose what I do. A lot of it is for the press. MARK: She’s definitely pickier. MARSHA: You know, I’m kind of a Bipolar Betty, a moody kind of a gal. I’m trying to take it easy and getting rid of some of this drag stuff. I get rid of a lot, and then there’s more and more. I get rid of that, and still there’s more. I’m trying to take it easy and take care of Mark. MARK: I’m doing more with our video and archives, and I’m writing my autobiography, Delusions of Glamour. I’m also working on a horror story set in the drag/trans community and the world of beauty pageants and pumping parties, you know the kind where queens and trans showgirls go into backrooms and seedy motels for illegal surgeries. It’s going to be very Rob Zombie-esque, although I’ve always thought of myself as more of a John Waters guy.

YOU DO? A LOT OF PITTSBURGHERS PRETEND THAT THEY DON’T LIKE PRIMANTI’S, LIKE THEY’RE TOO GOOD FOR IT. MARSHA: Jesus, then don’t fucking eat it or talk about it. Go to McDonald’s and clog your arteries that way; what do I care. But, I mean, what’s better? They do it your way. If you want the coleslaw separate, eat the coleslaw separate. If you don’t want the coleslaw, then don’t fucking eat the fucking coleslaw. You have to go to Primanti’s after hours. MARK: I once saw her at Primanti’s at 4 a.m. eating a sandwich with her wig in her hand, using it to wipe the lipstick off her teeth. MARSHA: Look, I go party, and then I go to Primanti’s. One time I partied, went to Primanti’s at 4, and then went out and partied again until noon. And then I had to ride the bus from Mount Washington to Lawrenceville to my mother’s house because I lost my goddamned keys. Primanti’s is the best at 4 a.m., and I can’t believe some people think it’s beneath them. Who’s got the energy to be bougie at 4 in the morning? CDEITCH@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

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Next time you’re painting the town, take the bus or T. Next time you’re headed to PPG Paints Arena, consider transit. Steel Plaza T Station is a short walk and 61 and 71 routes have stops nearby. Hop on board, we’ll get you there.


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