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WWW.PGHCITYPAPER.COM | 12.24/12.31.2014

THE 12 TALES OF PITTSBURGH: OUR 2014 YEAR IN REVIEW


EVENTS 12.29 – 10am-5pm SPECIAL HOLIDAY HOURS The Warhol will be open on Monday, December 29 from 10am to 5pm.

1.17 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: AMERNET STRING QUARTET WITH PIANIST AMY WILLIAMS Warhol theater Co-presented with the Music on the Edge series of the University of Pittsburgh Department of Music FREE parking in The Warhol lot. Advance Tickets $15/$10 students; Door Tickets $20/15 students

1.21 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: KEN VANDERMARK / NATE WOOLEY DUO Warhol Theater FREE Parking in Warhol Lot Tickets $15/$12 Members & students

1.30 – 7pm EXHIBITION OPENING: SOMEDAY IS NOW: THE ART OF CORITA KENT Sponsored by UPMC FREE

1.31 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: JESSICA MEYER AND SETH JOSEL Warhol theater Co-presented with the Music on the Edge series of the University of Pittsburgh Department of Music FREE parking in The Warhol lot. Advance Tickets $15/$10 students; Door Tickets $20/15 students

Chuck Connelly: My America

Support for the Pittsburgh Biennial has been provided by The Fine Foundation; Hillman Family Foundations; the James L. Baker Memorial Fund, the Hollen Bolmgren Fund, and the W. Alfred Turner Memorial Fund of The Pittsburgh Foundation; Richard King Mellon Foundation; Highmark; and an anonymous donor.

Marking his ďŹ rst solo museum show.

Chuck Connelly, Idiot Box (detail), 2013, Courtesy of the artist

Also on view:

+LS[HPZ[OLVɉ JPHSHPYSPULZWVUZVYMVY4VZ[>HU[LK4LU!(UK`>HYOVSHUK[OL >VYSKÂťZ-HPY This exhibition was developed collaboratively by the Queens Museum and The Andy Warhol Museum. 13 Most Wanted Men: Andy Warhol and the 1964 World’s Fair is made possible by a generous grant from the Henry Luce Foundation.

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The Andy Warhol Museum receives state arts funding support through a grant from the Pennsylvania Council on the Arts, a state agency funded by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania; the National Endowment for the Arts, a federal agency and The Heinz Endowments. Further support is provided by the Allegheny Regional Asset District.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014


12.24/12.31.2014 VOLUME 24 + ISSUE 52

{EDITORIAL} Editor CHARLIE DEITCH Arts & Entertainment Editor BILL O’DRISCOLL Music Editor ANDY MULKERIN Associate Editor AL HOFF Multimedia Editor ASHLEY MURRAY Listings Editor MARGARET WELSH Assistant Listings Editor CELINE ROBERTS Staff Writers REBECCA NUTTALL, ALEX ZIMMERMAN Staff Photographer HEATHER MULL Interns DANIELLE FOX, SAMANTHA WARD

{ART} Director of Operations KEVIN SHEPHERD Production Director JULIE SKIDMORE Art Director LISA CUNNINGHAM Graphic Designers SHEILA LETSON, JEFF SCHRECKENGOST, JENNIFER TRIVELLI

{ADVERTISING} {COVER ILLUSTRATION BY VINCE DORSE}

[NEWS] EWS] out a dozen stories that shaped 06 Check Pittsburgh in 2014 in our year in review.

[NEWS] Books was one of the literary 15 “City centers in Pittsburgh for many years.” — Poet and teacher Michael Wurster on the closing of City Books

[TASTE] Stix are four-ounce slices of 18 “Bacon hickory-smoked bacon, fried and balsamic-glazed.” — Angelique Bamberg and Jason Roth review Jamison’s

[MUSIC] was the kind of moment you can’t 23 “Itphotograph.”— Julia Cook on The Spring Standards’ intimate set at Mr. Small’s, in our year-end music roundup

[SCREEN]

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“This isn’t just a domestic melodrama and art fraud; the means of production matters a lot.” — Al Hoff reviews Big Eyes

[ARTS] a fine example of what is 37 “Itnowwascalled a platform — not quite a performance by an artist and not quite an exhibit.” — Robert Raczka on one of five artworks outside the box from 2014

[LAST PAGE] was moving faster than my little feet 55 “Icould carry me, / Strung out on candy canes / Eggnog. / And great anticipation.” — A Christmas poem from Jimmy Cvetic

{REGULAR & SPECIAL FEATURES} NEWS OF THE WEIRD BY CHUCK SHEPHERD 16 EVENTS LISTINGS 40 SAVAGE LOVE BY DAN SAVAGE 50 FREE WILL ASTROLOGY BY ROB BREZSNY 51

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DECEMBER 26 // RADIO TOKYO DECEMBER 27 // HOUSE OF SOUL

{ADMINISTRATION} Business Manager LAURA ANTONIO Circulation Director JIM LAVRINC Office Administrator RODNEY REGAN Technical Director PAUL CARROLL Interactive Media Manager CARLO LEO

NEW YEAR’S EVE DECEMBER 31 CITYSCAPE // HEADLINERS TWICE AS NICE // OUTSIDE OF THE CLUBHOUSE DJ AJ FRESH // VIBE

{PUBLISHER} STEEL CITY MEDIA GENERAL POLICIES: Contents copyrighted 2014 by Steel City Media. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without written permission of the publisher. The opinions expressed in Pittsburgh City Paper are those of the author and not necessarily of Steel City Media. LETTER POLICY: Letters, faxes or e-mails must be signed and include town and daytime phone number for confirmation. We may edit for length and clarity. DISTRIBUTION: Pittsburgh City Paper is published weekly by Steel City Media and is available free of charge at select distribution locations. One copy per reader; copies of past issues may be purchased for $3.00 each, payable in advance to Pittsburgh City Paper. FIRST CLASS MAIL SUBSCRIPTIONS: Available for $175 per year, $95 per half year. No refunds.

JANUARY 2 // GOOD GUYS BAND JANUARY 3 // ELVIS SHOW WALT SANDERS & THE CADILLAC BAND

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A DOZEN STORIES THAT DEFINED PITTSBURGH IN 2014

UNDERCOVER MAYOR As Mayor Bill Peduto donned a backwoods costume and Southern accent as a guy from Kentucky working with Pittsburgh Public Works for Undercover Boss, his constituents took to Twitter to be part of the Pittsburgh TV extravaganza. Between collecting trash and chopping down trees, Peduto offered ideas on creating partnerships with neighboring municipalities and training kids to do carpentry. While some viewers didn’t appreciate the short history lesson Peduto offered on former Mayor Luke Ravenstahl, others were happy just to call early Halloween predictions on how many people in Pittsburgh would wear the costume next October.

“The first kid that comes to our house next Halloween dressed as Kentucky Peduto is getting a box of full-sized candy bars.”

“No justice was done for Pittsburgh. Not a single #Yinz in the entire episode. P.S. Peduto’s disguise was total Yinzer gear. #GrowAPair” — Dec. 21 tweet from “D. Swolliven” (@Dougizzle)

{ILLUSTRATION BY VINCE DORSE}

— Dec. 21 tweet from “Ryan Askey” (@beastyR)

“Peduto using national stage to pile on @luke_ravenstahl … come on …” — Dec. 21 tweet from “D” (@I_Am_Score)

“See Deb, ain’t nothing wrong with my glasses. Even @billpeduto wears ’em.” — Dec. 21 tweet from “Pittsburgh Dad” (@Pittsburgh_Dad)

“I bet Undercover Boss still would have rated spectacularly in the 412 with no Peduto and just cuts between different Pittsburgh B-roll shots.” — Dec. 21 tweet from “Adam Bittner” (@fugimaster24)

“We can criticize a lot of things about govt, but Peduto has been fully accessible & transparent aside from lying about his identity just now” — Dec. 21 tweet from “duhnika” (@duh_nika)

“My two faves: local politics and reality TV. I think we really need more of this to engage people.” Dec. 22 tweet from “Jawn Devor” (@JenDevor)

E

From Tom Corbett’s history-making defeat to Josh Harrison’s All-Star season, 2014 went by in a flash {BY CITY PAPER STAFF} in state government. But 236 is the number apparently sent and received by Pennsylvania Supreme Court Justice Seamus McCaffrey. McCaffrey resigned over the scandal, as did six members of Gov. Corbett’s staff and cabinet. An additional 31 employees in the attorney general’s office were reprimanded. It was during Attorney General Kathleen Kane’s investigation into the handling of the Jerry Sandusky case that she unearthed the plethora of material that had been swapped between state employees and officials over the years.

VERYTHING’S BETTER when

it’s set to music. At least that was our premise while putting together this year’s list of noteworthy events from 2014. The following list, sung to the tune of the 12 Days of Christmas if you so desire, is a quick look back at some of the stories that we reported on and that our readers talked about.

Three All-Star Buccos

A single term for Gov. Corbett Unless you were actually named Tom Corbett, you probably saw this coming for at least two years. Since the midway point in his term, the governor’s budget-slashing, inability to work with his own party and failure to deliver on his most ambitious campaign promises (including state liquor-store reform) pretty much sealed his fate as the state’s first one-term governor in more than 40 years. Corbett was walloped in November by York millionaire Tom Wolf, who opened

COMPILED BY ASHLEY MURRAY

6

12 STORIES OF NOTE

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

{PHOTO BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

Tom Wolf

up an early lead in the polls and never looked back.

Two (hundred thirty-six) judicial porn emails There were actually several hundred sexuallyexplicit emails traded among men in power

The Pirates thrilled fans again in 2014, making the postseason and winning 88 games. In addition. three Pittsburgh Pirates were chosen for the 2014 MLB All-Star game in July. Perennial All-Star and last year’s MVP Andrew McCutchen was voted in by the fans, while reliever Tony Watson and super-utility player Josh Harrison were chosen by National League manager Mike Matheny. But the big surprise and breakout star of last season was Harrison. Going into the All-Star break, in CONTINUES ON PG. 08


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12 STORIES OF NOTE, CONTINUED FROM PG. 06

limited action, he was hitting .297 with 15 doubles, four triples, five home runs and 28 RBIs. He also played five different positions, making highlight-reel-defensive plays at all of them. Harrison only got better in the second half, landing himself in a heated battle for the NL batting title by the end of the season.

Four years of sewage rate hikes

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In January, the Allegheny County Sanitary Authority hiked rates by 17 percent — and will raise rates 11 percent annually until 2017 — to fund a federally mandated fix to reduce the sewage that overflows into our waterways during heavy rain and snowmelt. The ALCOSAN/EPA consent decree has shined a spotlight on the often invisible topic of water management … and, gross, sewage. Economic justice-seekers and environmentalists joined forces on the issue in 2014 — raising awareness about household income disparities and rising utility bills as well as a debate on green vs. gray infrastructure.

{PHOTO COURTESY OF PITTSBURGH PIRATES}

Josh Harrison

our economic-development strategy,” says Peduto.

Six million dollars in rideshare fines

The past year has been kind of a joyride for Lyft and Uber, rideshare titans trying to leverage public rage against the current taxi establishment to get a foothold in Pittsburgh. They swooped in without permits, ignored If anyone was concerned Mayor Bill Peduto’s cease-and-desist orders and scoffed at fines bike-friendly campaign stance was just imposed by the PUC. for show, his first year But they actually show in office has pretty up when you need a much dispelled that ride, a bar low enough thought. He’s checked to largely win the public’s out Copenhagen’s bike approval and that of infrastructure, taken local and state legislators a bike tour of nearby who vowed to update Malmö and brought in state regulations to grant funding that will accommodate them. support five miles of They’ve managed to protected bike lanes fight these battles like around the city. The scrappy, independent lanes have already gone entrepreneurs despite up Downtown along {PHOTO BY LISA CUNNINGHAM} being billion-dollar Penn Avenue, in Schenley The bike lane on Penn Ave., Downtown companies backed Park and in Greenfield. by Goldman Sachs (Uber) and hedge fund And these aren’t just for the 1 to 2 percent Third Point Capital (Lyft). who bike to work — they’re “a viable part of

Five miles of bike lanes

CONTINUES ON PG. 10

Christmas Eve Worship DECEMBER 24 5:00 PM Family Service 11:00 PM Candlelight Service (Prelude Music begins at 10:30 pm)

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

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12 STORIES OF NOTE, CONTINUED FROM PG. 08

Seven (million-dollar) August Wilson Center buyout live music, great wine

PITTSBURGH WINERY LIVE IN THE CELLAR

Dec. 26 Frank Nicotero’s Blue XXXmas Comedy Shows

with guest comedians, Shaun Blakham, Auggie Cook, and T-Rob. Two Shows 7:30PM + 10PM

After a year-long battle over the future of the August Wilson Center, a group of three foundations purchased the center for $7.9 million in November. The Heinz Endowments, Richard King Mellon Foundation and Pittsburgh Foundation plan to maintain the center’s mission as an African-American culture center. Troubles began in September 2013, when Dollar Bank moved to foreclose on the center. Originally, the favored bid was an offer by New York developers who wanted to build a hotel on top of the current structure. But the foundations — with the lobbying efforts of city and county officials — managed to secure it.

Featuring Clinton Clegg, Paul Luc, Nik Westman, Isaac Merz, and Jimbo Jackson

Dec. 28 Wreck Loose and Dan Bubien Band Dec. 29 The Midnight Horns featuring Danny Donahoe, Kenny Blake, Steve Treddle, Craig King, Donna Davis and Ronnie Biggs and more

Nine(teen) same-sex weddings

Eight(een) months in prison for Chief Harper

Dec. 27 “Songwriters in the Cellar”

On Feb. 25, former Pittsburgh Police Chief Nathan Harper was sentenced to 18 months in prison for conspiracy, theft of public funds and tax evasion. He began serving his sentence at the Federal Corrections Institute Peoria, in Illinois, on April 1. In 2013, Harper pled guilty to charges that he directed more than $70,000 in public funds to an unauthorized credit-union account and spent roughly $32,000 personally.

Dec. 30 Buzz Poets Jan. 10 The Tom Roberts Charlie Chaplin Silent Picture Show Jan. 16 The Sparrows and ill Willis Jan. 17 Strip District Music Festival

{PHOTO BY JOHN COLOMBO}

A group photo of 19 same-sex couples married by Mayor Bill Peduto

After a federal judge struck down the state’s ban on gay marriage, Pittsburgh Mayor Bill Peduto presided over a ceremony marrying 19 same-sex couples in June. The path to legalized gay marriage depended on unlikely ally Gov. Tom Corbett, who chose not to appeal the decision of U.S. District Judge John Jones (a George W. Bush appointee). And while Jones’ ruling reflected nationwide progress — “We are a better people than what these laws represent … and it is time to discard them into the ash

Wherever your holiday plans take you, have the best and brightest of New Years!

heap of history” — the fight will continue. Pennsylvania is still one of a handful of states where it is completely legal to fire someone on the basis of sexual orientation.

10 clergy arrested protesting UPMC Protests against UPMC outside of its Grant Street headquarters have been ongoing since a unionization effort began in 2012 to secure higher wages for the hospital chain’s nonmedical employees. But there was something different about this cold February morning. Ten members of the Pennsylvania Interfaith Impact Network tried to enter the U.S. Steel building in an effort to visit UPMC’s offices. They were refused entry and then refused to leave. They were handcuffed and led away by police.

Noon-Midnight Artists TBA

Jan. 23 “Songwriters in the Cellar” Hosted by Nathan Zoob with guests The Wreckids, Kayla Schureman, Mark Dignam, Max Somerville Josh Verbanets

Jan. 24 Jan. 30 Jan. 31 Feb. 6 Feb. 7

Joe Grushecky Solo Acoustic Boulevard of the Allies River Whyess The Black Lillies Runaway Dorothy

Feb. 13 Feb. 14 Feb. 21 Feb. 28

Silencio The Gathering Field Dharma Sons Brooke Annibale

{PHOTO BY CHARLIE DEITCH}

Local clergy are led away from UPMC headquarters in handcuffs.

However, they were released at the scene and sent citations through the mail. But that protest was the catalyst for a new level of engagement between the community, labor and UPMC. A protest a few days later shut down the city during rush hour when more than 1,000 people spilled into the streets in front of UPMC headquarters. Judging from the way this fight has unfolded and continues to evolve, look for it on this list next year as well.

with Mike Cali

11 pissy politicians

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

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This list is probably not inclusive, but here are 11 quick instances of politicians blocking progress, proposing harmful legislation or just plain behaving badly (allegedly, of course): Republican state house majority leader Mike Turzai blocked a crucial medicalCONTINUES ON PG.12


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marijuana bill from receiving a vote on the house floor. Republican Congressman Keith Rothfus ran from a City Paper reporter instead of answering questions about his record in October. Democratic City Councilor Darlene Harris was fined $20 for her “arrogant disregard” of council procedures which included grabbing, banging and then throwing the gavel of Council President Bruce Kraus. On the environment, Republican Sen. Pat Toomey is still denying climate change exists at all and Democratic U.S. Sen. Bob Casey, normally pretty good on green issues, wavered in support the President’s climate plan in favor of backing coal companies. Democratic state Sen. LeAnna Washington allegedly spent between $30,000 and $100,000 in taxpayer funds planning her annual birthday gala fundraiser. State Rep. Daryl Metcalfe could be on this list 11 different times for 11 separate stupid things he’s done throughout the year, but we’ll go with this: When his colleague, openly gay state Rep. Bryan Sims tried to speak in support of same-sex marriage, Metcalfe used procedure to keep Sims from talking, saying his stance on the topic was: “in open rebellion against God’s law.” Gov. Tom Corbett is on his way out the door, and new Gov. Tom Wolf is likely to expand Medicaid with federal dollars, but Corbett insisted on pushing his own “Healthy Pennsylvania” plan that got a federal green light a few months ago, although it leaves out thousands of low-income residents. State Rep. Mark Keller, out of central Pa., was the prime sponsor of a bill that gave gun-rights groups (like the NRA) the right to sue local municipalities over gun-control measures (like Pittsburgh’s lost-and-stolen gun ordinance). Former U.S. Sen. Rick Santorum announced he will run for president in 2016, and given his history, that’s enough to qualify as bad behavior. And although he’s already made

one appearance on this list, Daryl Metcalfe’s proposed legislation to strip the license of any in-state facility that takes in refugee immigrant children warrants a second mention, and probably the middle finger.

12 bullshit city rankings We’re the first to admit that the first time that Pittsburgh was named the country’s Most Livable City, it was kind of a big deal. We were shedding the “dirty steel-town image” and that ranking meant a lot to the people who had stuck it out and worked hard to move the city into the future. Nowadays, however, there seems to a new ranking every week that lists Pittsburgh as the best something, and people tout them as major accomplishments. But it’s almost becoming too much, and rankings that might mean something get lost in an avalanche of nonsense. There were way more than 12 in 2014, but here’s a quick dozen: Fifth best place to retire; most livable city based on a survey that looked at infrastructure, education, health care, stability, culture and environment; city with the 15th highest average credit score; 15th best city for millennials; top-10 destination for the Best All-American Vacation; second safest city for walking; 14th best city for recreation; most affordable city; fifth most resilient city in the world; top-10 list of cities for pursuing the American Dream; the ninth best city for telecommuters. And finally, Pittsburgh was included in the top-10 list of America’s most stunning views. OK, we actually can’t argue much with that one. INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

List written and compiled by Charlie Deitch, Ashley Murray, Rebecca Nuttall and Alex Zimmerman

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

Happy Holidays

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After 30 years, South Side’s City Books closing

3X

{BY BILL O’DRISCOLL} ABOUT 30 YEARS AGO, Duquesne University philosophy professor Edward Gelblum began running City Books. In the wake of Big Steel’s collapse, the East Carson Street storefront, known under its prior owner as City Books and Antiques, occupied a corridor thick with neighborhood bars. Within a few years, the South Side would also be studded with art galleries and performance spaces, with cozy, woodenshelved City Books as a cultural anchor. In the ’90s, as one of several bookstores in the neighborhood, City Books expanded to two floors of mostly used tomes, added a coffee bar, and perennially ranked among booklovers’ favorite spots in town. Things have changed. Those neighborhood taverns were supplanted by destination bars and restaurants. Clothing boutiques moved in. Most of the galleries are gone. And as of Dec. 31, for the first time in decades, the South Side will be without a bookstore, as City Books shuts its doors. The closure is only partly due to changes in the neighborhood, and the Internet’s toll on bookshops; it’s been years, Gelblum acknowledges, since the store turned a profit. Still, he and his wife, Chong Ae Gelblum, were fixtures there, especially after retiring from their day jobs. But last year, as Gelbum’s health declined, they started downsizing. The store at 1111 E. Carson (Gelblum and his family bought the building in 1989) is back to one floor, its distinctive spriral steel staircase now mostly ornamental. A closing sale cutting everything 80 percent began in November. (Just sayin’: first editions of Toni Morrison’s Paradise and David Attenborough’s The Living Planet for $6 total.) Gelblum sat for a recent interview at the store, where his wiry gray beard and studious manner were as familiar as the leatherbound collectibles shelved behind the massive, wheeled wooden front counter. “What we want is that someone will buy the whole place and carry on,” he said, though no one’s yet expressed an interest. Gelblum, a Baltimore native, met Chong Ae as a serviceman in Korea in the ’50s. He began teaching at Duquesne (political philosophy, phenomenology) in the 1960s. Before taking over City Books, he sold books out of the couple’s Mount Lebanon home. “You should see our house, there is nothing there but the books,” says Chonge Ae. “He’s just a reader.” The couple has two children.

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Ed and Chong Ae Gelblum at City Books

Gene, the elder, occupied the building’s third-floor flat for years. Natasha lives in Hawaii but recently visited to help close things down. “I kind of grew up in the store here,” she says. “City Books was one of the literary centers in Pittsburgh for many years,” says Michael Wurster, the poet and teacher whose Pittsburgh Poetry Exchange long held workshops and readings there. The shop hosted other readings, including some by luminaries like the late, locally based novelist Lewis Nordan, says Gelblum. City Books was a stop on the annual South Side Poetry Smorgasbord reading event. And for years, every annual Bloomsday tribute to Joyce’s Ulysses ended on City’s second floor, with a reading of Molly’s famous soliloquy. Gelblum even recalls hosting events for nearby City Theatre and Silver Eye Center for Photography. “It was a great bookstore,” says longtime customer Wurster. While Gelblum specialized in scholarly works in fields like philosophy, psychology and Judaica, even today the store has a nice selection of history, art and fiction. “He has a very good poetry section,” says Wurster. “It was just a very welcoming situation.” Wurster notes that newer bookstores elsewhere in town are filling City’s cultural niche. Still, recent visits to City Books conjure a wake. “I think it’s sad,” says frequent visitor Jon Hewson, 23, who works at a nearby restaurant. “I wish I could do more financially to help them out. … It’s a place that should be kept alive somehow.” City Books will be open irregularly through year’s end. Tuesday and Thursday afternoons are the best bets, but call ahead at 412-481-7555.

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GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER. MUST BE 21 YEARS OR OLDER TO BE ON RIVERS CASINO PROPERTY. MUST BE PRESENT AND HAVE VALID PHOTO ID TO WIN.

D RI SCO L L @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

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Welcome to Craft Beer 101. This week we will be featuring and educating you on the top craft beers of the week. Spend the holidays with your favorite craft beer.

A robust Porter made with chocolate malt. This malt Beverage is brewed with coffee beans with Natural Flavor added (Vanilla Extract), and we balance it with U.S. Golding Hops. Our award winning brew is sure to please! Open it!

An ale whose mysterious and unusual palate will swirl across your tongue & ask more than it answers. Brewed clandestinely & given a name whose meaning is never revealed. Why #9? Why indeed. A sort of dry, crisp, refreshing, not quite pale ale, #9 is really impossible to describe because there’s never been anything else quite like it. Malts: Pale, Crystal Hops: Apollo, Cascade

Named for the great ship that tragically sunk in Lake Superior in 1975 with many Northeast Ohioans on board, our Edmund Fitzgerald is the dark, brooding type. One sip of this complex, flavorful porter inspires lavish bar napkin poetry and spirited closing-time soliloquies.

blogh.pghcitypaper.com

Clicking “reload” makes the workday go faster 16

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014


NEXT WEEK!

DECEMBER 29 & 30 BENEDUM CENTER BOX OFFICE AT THEATER SQUARE TRUSTARTS.ORG • 412-456-6666 GROUPS 10+ TICKETS 412-471-6930

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MARMA-LADEN {BY BILL O’DRISCOLL} The apples were free — crisp, tart, plucked from an untended neighborhood tree of unknown variety. But our attempt at apple butter didn’t turn out so well (more like applesauce) and we had leftovers. Then the pears from our own tree began to ripen. Thanks to Ellie Topp and Margaret Howard’s The Complete Book of Small-Batch Preserving, my wife and I found a good use for this dual fall harvest. Making sweet preserves is challenging for novices, and this pear-apple-ginger marmalade was no exception. The recipe requires separate processing of the outer rind, the pith (inner white rind) and pulp of two lemons, plus slicing and peeling four cups each of apples and pears. (We had enough fruit for two such batches.) Candied ginger also figures in, as does plenty of sugar. But on the stovetop, the real trick is knowing when the bubbling, somewhat lumpy mixture of sugar, acid and the fruit’s pectin has formed a gel. We used the book’s spoon test — a measure of runniness — and we might have cooked it a little too long before canning, because the finished marmalade ended up a little difficult to spread. (Maybe next year the book’s “freezer test,” which employs a cold plate, warrants a try.) Nonetheless, the pear-apple-ginger marmalade’s deep-orange color is lovely, the flavor’s great, and we’re still eating off those two batches, with a few jars earmarked for Christmas gifts. DRISCOLL@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

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FEED

Time to make New ew Year’s resolutions! n! ns Worried about weight, ght, h general health, the th he environment, saving ving money? One easyy fix: Stop drinking soda;; cut back to regular coffee offee (no toppings!); and drink lots of water — from rom a glass or refillable container. i err Make 2015 the year you truly appreciate how lucky you are to have unlimited, free, safe water from a tap.

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BACON STIX ARE FOUR-OUNCE SLICES OF HICKORYSMOKED BACON, FRIED AND BALSAMIC-GLAZED

BURGERS AND MORE

{PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

{BY ANGELIQUE BAMBERG + JASON ROTH}

E

VERYONE KNOWS you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, but what about a restaurant? The Suburban Room, a cozy little watering hole tucked along Dormont’s West Liberty Avenue, was like a set piece from the early Mad Men era. Its frankly provincial name, shiny turquoise Carrera glass storefront and elegant chrome-script signage enticed us on a few occasions to experience the time capsule within. (Whiskey sour, anyone?) Then, a few years ago, The Suburban Room closed, taking its gloss of midcentury sophistication with it. The storefront’s new occupant, Jamison’s, struck us as just another sports bar, and we didn’t go back. Until last week, after a friend had sung the praises of Jamison’s food. He was right, we were wrong, and now we atone publicly for our aesthetics-based abandonment of this excellent tavern. Outside, promotional banners still cover much of that gleaming storefront we loved, and inside, the setup is standard-issue sport-bar: dark-ish, with lots of flat-screen TVs and a heavy emphasis on

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

BBQ bacon smokehouse burger

wings, burgers and other salty, beer-friendly foods. But, with two pork-based moves, Jamison’s menu separates itself from its myriad peers. The first: Bacon Stix. The second: Basi burgers. Allow us to explain.

JAMISON’S 3113 W. Liberty Ave., Dormont. 412-561-3088 HOURS: Mon.-Fri. 3 p.m.-2 a.m.; Sat. Sun. noon-2 a.m. PRICES: Appetizers, salads, sandwiches, burgers $5-12; entrees $11-17 LIQUOR: Full bar

CP APPROVED Even Jason has grown a bit weary of the recent bacon mania, but still: Bacon is delicious. Even more so are Jamison’s Bacon Stix, four-ounce slices of hickorysmoked bacon (an ordinary slice is about one ounce), fried and balsamic-glazed. The vinegar’s sweet-tart richness, judiciously applied, can be the perfect enhancement to balance bitter flavors, and a foil to salty ones. That’s how it works on the Bacon Stix, upping the interplay

of sweet, sour, smoky, salty and savory notes to positively symphonic levels. This balsamic bacon’s texture is chewy like a snack and meaty like a meal, and it lends itself to all sorts of applications. Indeed, Bacon Stix show up all over the menu: on pizzas and sandwiches, in salads and even pasta carbonara. Basi — short for kielbasa — puts an often-overlooked form of pork, uncured Polish sausage, at center stage. Any burger at Jamison’s is available with beef or basi patties, and you can also get just about anything — pierogies, quesadillas, a nachoslike mountain of potato chips — stuffed or topped with it. We held off on the Basi until burger time, though, and began with traditional potato pierogies. Their thick, almost pastrylike wrappers were fried crisp, which might be a problem if those wrappers weren’t so good: tender and flaky, not tough or chewy, despite their time in a searing-hot pan. The contrast with flavorful, creamy potatocheddar filling and plenty of buttery onions was effective.


Burgers are available in various tantalizing designs, from the Memphis (barbecue sauce, Swiss cheese and cole slaw) to the Sunrise (with egg). A simple, unadorned quarter-pound beef burger was a cross between diner-style (well-griddled with crisp edges) and the current fashion (plump and fire-charred) with good quality, beefy-tasting meat. We liked that all the burgers were available in four- or eight-ounce portions. We tried our Basi burger smokehousebacon barbecue style: topped with smokehouse-aged white cheddar, Bacon Stix, barbecue sauce, homemade onion rings and a pickle. Unsurprisingly, this towering combination was taller than it was wide, with a stack of three onion rings contributing much of its mass. But wow, was it good, especially in bites where the smoked white cheddar stepped forward. Among all of these ingredients, though, it was a bit hard to tease out the particular contribution of the Basi patty. Jason thought the seasoning of the kielbasa might have contributed to a bit of salty overkill in this particular combination. Next time, he’ll order a Basi burger naked to savor its full effect.

On the RoCKs

{BY DREW CRANISKY}

CHAMPAGNELESS Don’t go broke on holiday wines

It’s that magical time of year, the time when it’s OK to gorge on sticky-sweet cookies, sentimental kitsch and, of course, plenty of bubbly. Though Champagne is the go-to choice for New Year’s Eve toasts and brunches with the in-laws, a decent bottle doesn’t come cheap. Like Camembert cheese or Prosciutto di Parma, Champagne has a protected designation of origin, meaning that the grapes must be grown in the Champagne region of France in order to call it Champagne. While such exclusivity carries plenty of clout, it tends to carry a hefty price tag as well.

CHAMPAGNE-LIKE WINES FROM OTHER REGIONS OF FRANCE OFFER AN OUTSTANDING VALUE.

Sweet barbecue sauce in the pulled-pork sandwich lived up to its name, unfortunately overwhelming the pork, which seemed to be pretty good underneath it all. A slice of red onion was a nice touch, its pungency a welcome counterbalance to the sauce. Jamison’s offers several full-on entrees in addition to its full array of burgers and “sammiches,” and if the spaghetti carbonara was any indication, the kitchen’s knack extends to knife-and-fork fare. A moderate portion balanced the caloric creaminess of the homemade sauce, and the bowl was liberally studded with pieces of flavorful grilled chicken breast, plenty of peas and diced Bacon Stix. The Suburban Room had style, but Jamison’s has substance. Mad men never had it this good.

Fortunately, there are options a bit easier on your wallet. “I tend to look for things made in the style of Champagne,” explains John Wabeck, beverage director at Spoon. He cited cava, a Spanish sparkling wine, and Franciacorta, Prosecco’s lesser-known, more refined cousin, as two good bets. Dreadnought Wines’ Rob McCaughey echoes Wabeck’s sentiment. “If you see the words ‘Méthode Champenoise’ or ‘Méthode Traditionnelle’ on a bottle, it means it is made in the Champagne method, so these are generally going to have those bready, toasty notes that people enjoy,” he explains. Crémants, Champagne-like wines made in other regions of France, offer similar flavors at an outstanding value. Look especially for those from the Loire and Limoux regions, two of McCaughey’s favorites. Of course, not every holiday meal calls for bready, toasty notes. For something versatile and crowd-pleasing, Narcisi Winery’s Nicolette Chilton recommends a rosé. Made both still and sparkling, Chilton explains that a good rosé is “dry but fruity, refreshing and crisp with a lot of rose and cherry flavors.” As she points out, pink does not always equal sweet, and a drier rosé could complement a range of rich winter foods. Though none of these may have the pedigree of Champagne, you’ll be able to afford more than one bottle. And that ought to get everyone in the holiday spirit.

INFO@ PGHC ITY PAP ER.CO M

INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

Jamison’s chef Andrew Bash

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Dine In/Take Out/Delivery

THE FOLLOWING DINING LISTINGS ARE RESTAURANTS RECOMMENDED BY CITY PAPER FOOD CRITICS

DINING LISTINGS KEY

J = Cheap K = Night Out L = Splurge E = Alcohol Served F = BYOB

40 Craft Beers Holiday Hours: Christmas Eve 11AM-9:30PM Christmas Day 4-9PM New Years Eve 11AM-10PM New Years Day 4-9:30PM

w

ontap w

NewYEARS DAY

BRUNCH 10am-3pm

Find our online menu at WWW.osakapgh .osakapgh..COM or order online at WWW.beyondmenu .beyondmenu..COM Cornbread Benedict

2101 Greentree Rd.

24th & E. Carson St. in th the South Side 412-390-1111 412

412-279-8811

100 Adams Shoppes Mars/Cranberry Mar 724-553-5212 724

(next to Applebee’s in Scott Towne Center)

WWW.osakapgh.COM

DoubleWideGrill.com

Best Margaritas and To gh! Mexican food in the ‘burgh! r W NEtsbu Pit

o c o L o r o T El Grille & ull” “The Crazy B

Cantina

Monday & Thursday

MonDAY/WedNESDAY/SatURDAY $ 3.50 MargARITAS -----------------TACO Tuesday & Taco Thursday 99¢ tacos & 99¢ beers specials

$2 Yuengling 16oz Draft ____________________

Tuesday

1/2 Price Wine by the Bottle ____________________

Wednesday

Pork & Pounder $10 ____________________

Friday

Sangria $2.95 ____________________

Saturday & Sunday 10:30am-3pm

Brunch Specials & Bloody Mary Bar

----- HAPPY HOUR -----

2512 East Carson St. (412) 431-1100 www.eltorolocomexrestaurant.com

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

1/2 OFF SNACKS $2 OFF DRAFTS $5 WINE FEATURE

Mon- Fri 4:30 – 6:30pm ____________________ 900 Western Ave. I NORTH SIDE

412-224-2163

BenjaminsPgh.com

APSARA CAFÉ. 1703 E. Carson St., South Side. 412-251-0664. This storefront restaurant offers primarily Cambodian food alongside Thai and a limited Chinese selection, with a menu balanced between unfamiliar and familiar dishes. For less common fare, try Cambodian puffed rice squares, or saramann, cubes of chuck slow-simmered in a thick, warmly spiced coconut-milk sauce. KF BISTRO 19. 711 Washington Road, Mount Lebanon. 412-306-1919. Bistro 19 fits within the upper echelon of the region’s dining scene, while keeping its cozy neighborhood feel. It offers a broad range of surf and turf, pastas and poultry. Its inventive preparations, and the kitchen’s attention to detail, make even now-familiar items such as pot-stickers and flatbreads exciting. LE THE CAMBOD-ICAN KITCHEN. 1701 E. Carson St., South Side. 412-381-6199. Having made the jump from street truck to modest sit-down venue, the owners retained their menu, so popular with the late-night crowd, of fresh-cooked Cambodian cuisine. Kabobs, fried wontons, chicken, shrimp cakes, curried vegetable bowls and fried noodles are among the restaurant’s staples, as is its distinctive in-house “moon sauce” and fresh limeade. JF

Apsara Café {PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL} but the well-prepared Turkish food is a year-round asset. The menu is familiar — hummus, falafel, gyros, shish kebab — but the execution is notable and the flavors rich. Lamb features as sausages, chops and a burger, and grilled chicken breast doesn’t get much better than Daphne’s shish kebab. KF DELUCA’S. 2015 Penn Ave., Strip District. 412-566-2195. DeLuca’s doesn’t have the White House cachet of Pamela’s, but the portions are large and the quarters are close. On weekends, it’s one of Pittsburgh’s great gathering places. Try the “Super Bowl” omelet. J

THE CAPITAL GRILLE. 301 Fifth Ave., Downtown. 412-338-9100. This dark, clubby restaurant excels at VIP service, and offers a menu highlighted by steaks, chops and seafood, with sophisticated but straightforward preparations such as crab cakes with added lobster, or steak encrusted in Kona coffee beans. Also, the Grille employs its own butcher (for cutting and dry-aging), and desserts are made on site. LE THE CHELSEA GRILLE. 515 Allegheny Ave., Oakmont. 412-828-0570. The menu here covers mostly familiar ground, with red-sauce pasta, chops and an unusual predilection for Mornay sauce. But that’s not to say that dinner here is rote. From the fritto baguette to the rarebit-ish Chicken Wisconsin, the classics prove quite surprising. JE DAPHNE. 5811 Ellsworth Ave., Shadyside. 412-441-1130. Outside seating is a plus here,

The Porch {PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL} DOUBLE WIDE GRILL. 2339 E. Carson St., South Side (412-390-1111) and 100 Adams Shoppes, Route 288, Mars (724-553-5212). You may cringe at the “white trash” theme, or feel bemused at ordering sautéed shrimp and woodgrilled portabella on a faux TV-dinner tray. But there’s plenty of good vegan fare, beer and a fun filling-station-turnedrestaurant ambience. KE

D’S SIX PAX & DOGZ. 1118 S. Braddock Ave., Regent Square. 412-241-4666. This established venue is known for its revered pub fries and the classic wiener with kraut (plus plenty of beer to wash it down). But don’t miss the pizza, with a top-notch crust. D’s continues to raise the preparation of salty, cheesy, fatty comfort food to an art. JE HIMALAYAS. 20445 Route 19, Excel Center Plaza, Cranberry. 724-779-4454. This restaurant features the cuisine of Nepal, fare influenced by neighboring India and China. Thus, expect chow mein to be flavored with subcontinental spices, and to find tweaked version of familiar Indian items such as samosas. Be sure to try the signature dish — momos, or large fried or steamed dumplings, filled with meats or vegetables. KF LA PALAPA. 1925 E. Carson St., South Side. 412-586-7015 or 412-586-4943. Among the basic offerings at this bright, colorful storefront Mexican restaurant — tamales, nachos, tacos, enchiladas — there is other less familiar fare, such as a squid and shrimp salad. And the staple dishes excel with the inclusion of expertly cooked meats, which are moist and flavorful. KF LULA. 515 Broad St., Sewickley. 412-749-1200. Seating at this informal tapas bar is lounge-style indoors, and in warm weather, along the sidewalk at café tables. The menu, which also offers a few entrees, is eclectic, and suggestive of Mediterranean cafés, with plenty of seafood, cured meats, cheeses and seasonal produce. Portions are adequate for sharing, if you can bear to part with, CONTINUES ON PG. 22


GUS’S RESTAURANT AND BAR

Gluten Free · Vegetarian · Vegan Offerings HOURS: FRIDAY - MONDAY OPEN AT 11 AM • TUESDAY - THURSDAY OPEN 4PM TO 2AM

UPCOMING EVENTS

ALL EVENTS 10PM-2AM NO COVER

MONDAY: ANYTHING GOES

HOPPY HOUR

OPEN TURNTABLE NIGHT ____________________________________________

THURSDAY: DARK WAVE

DJ EZ LOU ____________________________________________ ____ ____ __ _ _

FRIDAY:

FRIDAYS IN JANUARY: DJ SELECTA $2 PBR 24OZ CANS ____________________________________________ _____

MON–FRI 4-6 PM

HALF OFF TAPS

SATURDAY: INTERNATIONAL MUSIC

REGGAE - CARIBBEAN - DANCEHALL ____________________________________________

SUNDAY: VAPE NIGHT

COMING IN JANUARY : OPEN MIC NIGHT

WEEKLY SPECIALS WEDNESDAY: All-You-Can-Eat

Jumbo Grilled Wings $15 (free range, no hormones, no antibiotics, local) ____________________________________________

THURSDAY: Vegan

Night 25% Off ALL Vegan Menu Items ____________________________________________

FRIDAY: Open

for Lunch at 11am Bourbon Night $2 Off select Bourbon ____________________________________________

HT EVERY SUNDAY VAPE NIG IN A CE BRING YOUR MODS AND JUINM ENT. RO VI VAPE FRIENDLY EN

Stop by Gus’s Café and try our Premium Vape Flavors at our Tester Stations Featuring:

SATURDAY: Brunch 11am–4pm ____________________________________________ SUNDAY: Sunday

Brunch from 11am-4pm All-You-Can-Eat Sliders $15 4pm–Close (local, no hormones, no antibiotics) ____________________________________________

MONDAY: Half

Menu Mondays 11am–Close. Everything on the food menu is HALF OFF ____________________________________________

TUESDAY: Burg

Night-Half Off Burgers Plus Complimentary Bacon at the bar

4717 Butler St. · LAWRENCEVILLE 412-315-7271 · facebook.com/Gusscafe N E W S

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DINING OUT, CONTINUED FROM PG. 20

$ 2 DRINKS FRI-SAT

U CALL ITS

10PM-MIDNIGHT

new years eve

$ 3 U CALL ITS 9PM-MIDNIGHT dj-No cover

2031 Penn Ave. (at 21st) • 412.904.1242

2328 EE. Carson St St.

now open 7 days a week!

412.481.0852

@casareynamex

The FRESHEST Local Produce from The Strip

TIC THAI CUISINE AUTHEN

SOUTHSIDE

Thank you City Paper readers for voting us one of the Best Chinese Restaurants in Pittsburgh

China Palace Shadyside Featuring cuisine in the style of

Peking, Hunan, Szechuan and Mandarin

ALL LUNCHES

$

$

8- 10

MON TUE-THU FRI-SAT SUN

11:30-3:00 11:30-9:00 11:00-9:00 12:00-5:00

DINE IN / TAKE OUT / BYOB DI

1906 PENN AVENUE STRIP DISTRICT 412-586-4107 LITTLEBANGKOKINTHESTRIP.COM 22

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

100 VEGETARIAN DISHES!

Delivery Hours

11:30 - 2 pm and 5-10pm

5440 Walnut Street, Shadyside 412-687-RICE chinapalace-shadyside.com

Teppanyaki Kyoto {PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL} say, asparagus spears wrapped in ham. KE MONTEREY PUB. 1227 Monterey St., North Side. 412-322-6535. A welcoming neighborhood bar with a menu of classic pub grub and Irish standards (such as “bangers and mash”) But there is also the occasional Asian flourish or unexpected ingredient mash-up, such as Thai red curry wings, fried green beans, an Irish-Cuban sandwich and a BLT with salmon. JE

cuisine that is modern without being stark, homey without being heavy. Consider a pizza dressed with butternut squash, pork belly atop roasted pumpkin, or lasagne with house-made chive pasta. KE SAUSALIDO. 4621 Liberty Ave., Bloomfield. 412-683-4575. Casual elegance is the byword at this neighborhood venue, where the fare is inspired by Northern California cuisine, with seasonal ingredients combined into New American and Continental dishes. The preparations vary widely, from ultra-traditional offerings like crab-stuffed shrimp to au courant updates like duck with orangeapricot balsamic glaze. LF

NEW HOW LEE. 5888 Forbes Ave., Squirrel Hill. 412-422-1888. It’s an oddly signed storefront restaurant, but this is Sichuan cuisine that rises above its peers with food that’s well cooked, expertly seasoned and TASTE OF INDIA. 4320 fearlessly spicy. The Penn Ave., Bloomfield. less-typical entrees 412-681-7700. Yogi include cumin mutton, Berra groused about dan dan noodles, the restaurant nobody tea-smoked duck went to — because www. per and Chendu fried dry it was always too a p ty pghci m hot chicken. JF crowded. Taste of India .co is the opposite: Everyone NINE ON NINE. 900 Penn goes there partly because Ave., Downtown. 412-338you can always get a table. The 6463. This elegant restaurant atmosphere is almost surreally and lounge offers a maturation quiet, but the food is consistently of contemporary American good (try the paneer). Portions cuisine, effortlessly shifting from are ample, prices reasonable. JE refined Continental to Asian fusion to ingredient-focused TEPPANYAKI KYOTO. 5808 invention. Instead of showy Bryant St., Highland Park. creations, the kitchen produces 412-441-1610. This Japanese dishes that instantly seem right, restaurant offers fare drawn such as miso cod or thymefrom the menus of lunch roasted Amish chicken with counters, train stations and asparagus flan. LE family kitchens. From salads containing burdock root and OISHII BENTO. 119 Oakland rice balls to cabbage pancakes Ave., Oakland. 412-687-3335. and stir-fried noodles, this Bamboo walls and a low counter diner-style venue lets casual with colorful cloth cubes for eaters expand beyond sushi. KE seating denote a place for moderately priced Japanese food, UNION PIG AND CHICKEN. including sushi. Oishii also adds 220 N. Highland Ave., East a few Korean dishes for variety Liberty. 412-363-7675. This lively and spice; those seeking a little family-style BBQ venue hews heat might consider bulgogi, closely to tradition. The smoked the Korean BBQ. JF meats (ribs, brisket, pork shoulder and chicken) are “dry” (with THE PORCH. Schenley Plaza, sauces at table), and the sides are Forbes Avenue and Schenley well-prepared classics: mac-andDrive, Oakland. 412-687-6724. cheese, baked beans, collard An attractive wood-and-stone greens and coleslaw. Prices are structure set in the verdant heart higher than a roadside stand, but of Oakland, The Porch offers the quality is top-notch. KE

FULL LIST ONLINE


LOCAL

SOME HITS AND MISSES FROM 2014 AS COMPILED BY OUR MUSIC WRITERS

BEAT

{BY ANDY MULKERIN}

FRESH FACES

AMULKERIN@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

The Spring Standards had a campfire singalong at Small’s this year.

Katie Hate (from left: Bobby Fello, Max Theofilis, Jake Saltzman) {PHOTO COURTESY OF LYDIA KARLHEIM}

The three guys in Katie Hate are young — all under 21. But it’s not a young band, per se. Drummer Jake Saltzman and bassist Bobby Fello touched base with Max Theofilis and started making music together in middle school, after all. The Penn Hills grads have gotten serious lately, and spent much of 2014 working — a little bit at a time — on the band’s debut album. And while it’s taken some time to perfect (and guitarist, singer and songwriter Theofilis insists the final product still won’t be perfect), the first record is the least of the punk-flavored rock band’s plans. “We have albums planned ahead,” Theofilis says. “At least five, with songs we’re familiar with already. As soon as this album is finished, we’ll have something to move on to.” Even as they break out of their teens, the three have designs on concept albums and big-idea stuff. Even if they’re a little cagey about it at times. “There’s a master plan to Katie Hate,” Theofilis notes. “There’s a theme that we want people to catch onto eventually. I like to write conceptually — not necessarily storylines, but just themes.” While the band has the bulk of the first record complete, it’s gotten this far without a single recording; aside from live YouTube videos, there’s been no way to hear Katie Hate without going to see Katie Hate live. Despite that, the band has established itself in the ranks of a young crop of bands around the area. A Lovely Crisis hosted the first real show Katie Hate played, and Katie Hate returns the favor by having that band on its Punk the Halls show at Mr. Small’s this Saturday, a sort of holiday-after-the-holiday event. It’s no small feat for a band so young — especially one still pushing for an early-2015 first release — to headline a sizable venue, but that’s no doubt due in part to Katie Hate’s commitment. “We practice, for the most part, five days a week,” explains Fello. “At least 300 days a year,” Saltzman adds with a laugh. “I’m not even kidding.”

THE YEAR IN OUR EARS MY FAVORITE ALBUMS OF 2014

5. The Antlers: Familiars Like 2011’s Burst Apart, Familiars is spacey, melancholic, and complements morning coffee better than anything else released this year.

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3. Son Lux (opened for San Fermin at The Andy Warhol Museum, Feb. 18). The packed house was utterly, astonishingly silent for Son Lux and his drummer, Ian Chang, who also lends his talents to Brooklyn rockers Landlady. The two bring heavy, reverberating beats that fall somewhere between rock and the music you’d hear at a Shadyside spa.

4. Andre Costello and the Cool Minors: Rattling Arcade Costello’s melodies are hard to top and the instrumentation of Matthew Florillo and Nicholas Charters complement them, making Rattling Arcade a well-built and well-rounded album.

3. Devin Miles: Pixburgh Production credits include Team Green, Adotthegod, Ric & Thadeus, Nash B, Andrew Lloyd & Karbon, and Christo. The production on Pixburgh is interesting enough to listen to on its own, but Miles impresses by allowing himself to be vulnerable while remaining confident, and refreshingly avoids the played-out hater motif. 2. Run The Jewels: RTJ2 Killer Mike and El-P did it again. What a record. 1. Spoon: They Want My Soul Spoon adds yet another dynamic album in 2014. At times danceable, at others introspective, and the production work (the band itself at the helm) is near perfect.

PUNK THE HALLS feat. KATIE HATE, SCENE STAGE THE WORLD, FIVEUNDER, A LOVELY CRISIS, HARBOURS, ANTHONY SARNELLI. 6:30 p.m. Sat., Dec. 27. Mr. Small’s Theatre, 400 Lincoln Ave., Millvale. $8. All ages. 412-821-4447 or www.mrsmalls.com N E W S

much-buzzed about local indie outfit kept the energy high between the brassy Caught a Ghost and electropop darlings Youngblood Hawke. Jeremy Westhead’s skillful drumming often chases quick guitar riffs on the album Adventures, which dropped in May.

RTJ2 proved a worthy sophomore effort from super duo Run the Jewels (Killer Mike and El-P).

MY FIVE FAVORITE OPENING ACTS OF 2014

5. The Spring Standards (opened for PigPen Theater Company at Mr. Small’s Theatre, April 1). The Spring Standards took advantage of the sparse audience, descending from the stage to play a campfire-like acoustic set. It was the kind of moment you can’t photograph, and one that brought Mr. Small’s back to its intended purpose as a venue. 4. Nevada Color (opened for Youngblood Hawke, The Club at Stage AE, Aug. 10). The

2. The Apache Relay (opened for Jenny Lewis, Mr. Small’s Theatre, July 27). Pittsburgh loved this band so much that we sold out its subsequent headlining show at Club Café in November. The ensemble seems to encapsulate Nashville old and new, obvious Americana influences blending with the melodrama of current indie pop. 1. Operators (opened for Future Islands at Mr. Small’s, Aug. 8). Operators burst on the scene in August, playing two sets at Pickathon and a live session on KEXP before releasing an EP and heading out on tour with Future Islands — all in the same week. Wolf Parade’s Dan Boeckner builds a neo-punk sound that lands somewhere between house music and the second coming of Robert Smith. — JULIA COOK

— SETH PFANNENSCHMIDT

CONTINUES ON PG. 24

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{PHOTO COURTESY OF DUSDIN CONDRI}

THE YEAR IN OUR EARS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 23

TWO PARTICULARLY ELEGANT USES OF SAXOPHONES IN ROCK MUSIC IN 2014 The War on Drugs, “Red Eye,”

from Lost in the Dream

Saxes exist on this track solely to appear and disappear, crescendo and decrescendo, the end effect being the sound of a distant foghorn from a ship that’s bobbing on choppy seas.

Sharon Van Etten, “Tarifa,” from Are We There

Sparingly interjected sax flourishes make the song in this case. Bonus points: Elsewhere on the same album, a bass clarinet(!) underpins what might be the record’s best, “Nothing Will Change.”

Sharon Van Etten mended broken hearts and employed woodwinds in 2014.

— ANDY MULKERIN

LARGE BANDS THAT MADE IT WORK ON A SMALL STAGE 2014

PigPen Theatre Co. at Mr. Small’s, April 1 Pitchblak Brass Band

at Cattivo, Oct. 25

Beauty Slap at Brillobox, Aug. 29 Most performances at Club Café — SAMANTHA WARD

PERFORMERS WHO SEEMED WAY TOO SMALL WHEN THEY WALKED ONSTAGE 2014 Anna Nalick (Altar Bar, March 18) Mayer Hawthorne (Thrival Festival, Sept. 13-14)

Moby (Thrival Festival, Sept. 13-14) — SAMANTHA WARD

SHOWS WHERE I WAS TOO BUSY WATCHING THE CROWD TO PAY ATTENTION TO THE ARTIST 2014

Green Velvet at Thrival, Sept. 13. Many of the older crowd members chose this time to really get down… and it was pretty bright outside.

Grizfolk at CMU, Sept. 28. There were only about 20 people in attendance; it was hard not to think about the large, awkward space we didn’t fill.

Icona Pop and Mac Miller at CMU Carnival, April 11. Too many people in the poorly thought-out space: Couldn’t see the stage, just a lot of underagers.

Motion City Soundtrack at Thrival, Sept. 13. Too busy watching millennials relive the

glory days. — SAMANTHA WARD

MY MOST LISTENED-TO BANDCAMP SITES (LOCAL EDITION)

Swingers Club (swingersclubpittsburghfuck.bandcamp.com) Real young dudes who sound like Pissed Jeans via the Birthday Party. My faith in humanity is renewed. The Lampshades (thelampshadespgh.bandcamp.com) Fuzzed-out, catchy garage-rock. Good for simultaneously bolstering and alleviating all those self-deprecating and neurotic tendencies. Chattel Tail (chatteltail.bandcamp.com) Laura Lee Burkhardt’s mostly solo folk-punk project is heavy on the heartache. (Excuse me, I have something in my eye.) Dendritic Arbor (dendriticarbors.bandcamp.com) This is an admittedly late addition to my regular rotation, which is too bad, because this hateful blackened noise would have made a great soundtrack to 2014, a year of bad moods. More Humans (morehumans.bandcamp.com) Not technically local (they live in D.C. now) but this elegantly melodic three-piece was formed in Pittsburgh, and that has to count for something. The band put up a couple new songs back in October, which re-sent me down the rabbit hole of its catalogue. — MARGARET WELSH, WHO REMINDS YOU TO PAY FOR MUSIC YOU LISTEN TO VIA BANDCAMP!

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014


THREE GOOD SIGNS FOR PITTSBURGH MUSIC IN 2014

The Nox Boys: The breakout of the mostly-teen garage-rock band is one of the best indicators in favor of good health for our rock scene in the next decade or so.

Wild Kindness Records: Jeff Betten’s takeover of the indie label and subsequent signing of a number of locals gives a certain brand of indie folk and rock a comfortable home base from which to develop.

Pittsburgh Hip-Hop Collaborative: R.A.R.E. Nation and 1Hood got together in 2014 to produce a series of discussions and concerts that helped to unify and organize the local hip-hop scene. — ANDY MULKERIN

{PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

R.A.R.E. Nation teamed up with 1Hood to produce talks and concerts this year.

THREE BAD SIGNS FOR PITTSBURGH MUSIC IN 2014

Garfield Artworks closing: We’re told there’s another venue on the way to take its place, but for now, the loss of a cutting-edge all-ages venue surely smarts. 720 Music, Clothing and Café closing: It hasn’t happened yet, but it

was announced that 720 will be done in January. A record shop, café and music space, its presence will be missed.

AVA Lounge closing again: It reopened for a hot minute and hosted a few shows, but the former Shadow Lounge partner business went under permanently this fall.

— ANDY MULKERIN

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CRITICS’ PICKS

Dopapod

[JAM ROCK] + SUN., DEC. 28

Here’s an alternative to sitting around in a post-holiday coma: Badboxes is bringing some electronic cheer to brighten your holidays at home. The local trio will pour out some heavy, self-proclaimed “Northern pop” in Cattivo tonight. The band wasn’t fully formed until after lead man Harrison Wargo released Badboxes’ first EP, JSMN. Now, a year later, the first track off its 2014 release, Violet, will still hook you in a second. Put down that leftover eggnog and dance off some of those comments your extended family made yesterday at dinner. Samantha Ward 9 p.m. 146 44th St., Lawrenceville. $6-8. 412-687-2157 or www.cattivo.biz

Dopapod is sort of a jam band, but there’s more to it. The four-piece combines funky beats with a mix of keyboard sounds, from classic rock organ to outer-space noises that suggest electronica. (Keys player Eli Winderman does a ton from behind his airplane-cockpit-looking console.) The band’s sets come replete with a light show, and walk the line between well-written pop songs and extended jams. The palindromic outfit brings its “New Year’s Eve Tour” to the Rex Theater tonight, but maybe don’t go expecting a ball-drop or “2015” glasses. AM 8 p.m. 1602 E. Carson St., South Side. $12-15. Age 17 and over. 412-381-6811 or www.rextheater.com

[INDIE FOLK] + SAT., DEC. 27 The weekend between Christmas and New Year’s is a Brooke Annibale classic opportunity for Pittsburgh expats to come home and hang out with family and friends — and perhaps to consider doing what Brooke Annibale did earlier this year and move home for good. Annibale, who’s picked up stronger than ever in the months since she returned to town after a few years in Nashville, brings her shoegazey indie folk — which has been featured on shows like Teen Mom and Pretty Little Liars — to Club Café tonight. She headlines, and Kevin Garrett plays as well. Andy Mulkerin 6 p.m. 56 S. 12th St., South Side. $8. 412-431-4950 or www.clubcafelive.com

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

{PHOTO COURTESY OF ALYSSE GAFKJEN}

[INDIE POP] + FRI., DEC. 26

[DJS] + WED., DEC. 31 Looking for a New Year’s Eve party that isn’t hosting a cover band or, worse, a monotonous DJ and an overpriced ticket? Round Corner Cantina is hosting a night of DJs, featuring Pittsburgh favorites Pandemic Pete and Edgar Um and New York City’s Uproot Andy. Um is known around Pittsburgh as a multi-media artist as well as co-founder of Honcho’s techno and house-music ragers. Pandemic and Uproot are both known for their world-beats creations, hybrids of traditional folk music and contemporary beats. Dubbed “¡No Mames New Year’s Eve!”, the event is sure to introduce you to some unlikely beats. SW 7 p.m. 3720 Butler St., Lawrenceville. $15-20. 412-904-2279 or www.roundcornercantina.com


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presents

5 201

EARS NEW RYTY A P

ing featur

VENUE: 7310 FRANKSTOWN AVE. PITTSBURGH, PA

Dec. 31st • 8PM-3AM

$25 PRESALE / $30 AT THE DOOR

TICKETS: WWW.TICKETING.COM/EVENTS/1337NYE

17+/21+ TO DRINK • MUST HAVE VALID ID TO DRINK • BYOB

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014


Serving 4 Generations Pittsburgh’s oldest and only cocktail lounge. Often imitated, but never duplicated

NEW YEAR’S EVE CELEBRATION Free T-shirts, Beads, Hats and Other Giveaways

Gene’s Place OAKLAND

Blue Line Grille

9:30- until they run out

DOWNTOWN

Redbeards

NO COVER Midnight Champagne Toast

DOWNTOWN

Bigham Tavern MT. WASHINGTON

William Penn Tavern

After one of our drinks, you’ll kiss your mother-in-law!

SHADYSIDE

Jamison’s DORMONT

T-Bone says, “It’s the pulse of Pittsburgh”

Local SOUTH SIDE

Rusty Barrel

731 Copeland St. Shadyside 412-683-0912 N E W S

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NEW RELEASES {BY ANDY MULKERIN}

CIGARETTES ©2014 SFNTC (4)

KLAYMORE JUSTIFIABLY PISSED (SELF-RELEASED) KLAYMORE.BANDCAMP.COM

* Visit NASCIGS.com or call 1-800-435-5515 PROMO CODE 101013 *Plus applicable sales tax

Offer for two “1 for $2” Gift Certificates good for any Natural American Spirit cigarette product (excludes RYO pouches and 150g tins). Not to be used in conjunction with any other offer. Offer and website restricted to U.S. smokers 21 years of age and older. Limit one offer per person per 12 month period. Offer void in MA and where prohibited. Other restrictions may apply. Offer expires 06/30/15.

Thrashy metal from the local fourpiece; this EP was released earlier in 2014. Good, aggressive, riff-driven stuff that’s tight musically, and at times super-catchy. After the album starts with snarling, almost Lemmylike vocals, I hoped for more, but most of the singing throughout is smoother and higher pitched, in Bruce Dickinson-Geddy Lee range. Either way, the lyrics are very metal without being overly corny. (Perhaps the only misstep is the talk-singing interlude in “Caught in Your Web,” which pans back and forth in a pretty distracting manner, on top of being a little too consonant-heavy to be delivered so fast.) Energetic, cleanly recorded music with a spot-on rhythm section (and that rare metal drummer who uses, but doesn’t abuse, the double-kick).

DEVIL’S HOLLER CROATOA (SELF-RELEASED) DEVILSHOLLER.BANDCAMP.COM

A recent full-length from a new project by veteran local songwriter Rob Gray. This one is mostly downbeat, dark folk, with guitar work inspired by American folk and sometimes perhaps the related John Fahey-Leo Kottke school. Gray’s songwriting is high-quality here, and his vocals — with Elliott Smith-style multi-tracking done quite well on many cuts — are comforting and sweet. Introspection, and ruminations on life, with lots of nature imagery; at times Gray recalls Wooden Wand’s James Jackson Toth (a high standard to aspire to), or Jackson C. Frank (as on “Sun Across the Sea”). Spooky stuff at times, but in a genuine way, and not overdone. Good work. AMULKERIN@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

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TO SUBMIT A LISTING: HTTP://PGHCITYPAPER.COM/HAPPENINGS

412.316.3388 (FAX) + 412.316.3342 X194 (PHONE)

{ALL LISTINGS MUST BE SUBMITTED BY 9 A.M. FRIDAY PRIOR TO PUBLICATION}

ROCK/POP FRI 26 ALTAR BAR. Go Go Gadjet. Strip District. 412-263-2877. BEE’Z BISTRO & PUB. The Dave Iglar Trio. Bridgeville. THE BRUCETON STATION. Moose Tracks. 412-653-4200. CATTIVO. BADBOXES, Emerson Jay. Lawrenceville. 412-687-2157. CLUB CAFE. Bill Deasy’s Annual Boxing Day Show (Early) Ali Spagnola’s Farewell to Pittsburgh Power Hour (Late). South Side. 412-431-4950. HOWLERS COYOTE CAFE. Nik Westman, James Hart & Gary Musisko. Bloomfield. 412-682-0320. LEVELS. Harry & Hermie. North Side. 412-231-7777. MOONDOG’S. Norman Nardini. Blawnox. 412-828-2040. RAMADA INN HOTEL & CONFERENCE CENTER. Jeff Jimerson & Airbourne. Greensburg. 724-552-0603. ROCKY’S ROUTE 8. Capsized. 412-487-6259. SMILING MOOSE. Blood Coven. South Side. 412-431-4668.

SPEAL’S TAVERN. Angry Johnny Stangry & the CRS Band. 724-433-1322. THUNDERBIRD CAFE. Tropidelic, Stationery Pebbles. Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177.

LEVELS. Etta Cox Trio. North Side. 412-231-7777. MR. SMALLS THEATER. Katie Hate & Friends, Scene Stage The World, Fiveunder, A Lovely Crisis, Harbours, Anthony Sarnelli. Punk The Halls Xmas Party Show. Millvale. 866-468-3401. ALTAR BAR. Camp THE R BAR. The Dave Element. Record release Iglar Band. Dormont. show. Strip District. 412-942-0882. . w ww per 412-263-2877. RAMADA INN HOTEL a p ty ci h g p BAJA BAR AND & CONFERENCE .com GRILL. King’s Ransom. CENTER. 13 Stories. Fox Chapel. 412-963-0640. Greensburg. 724-552-0603. CLUB CAFE. The Banned, SMILING MOOSE. Black Spencer Allan Patrick (Late). Market Body Parts, Basick Sickness, South Side. 412-431-4950. The Catastrophist & Weapons of DOWNEY’S HOUSE. John Choice. South Side. 412-431-4668. Wiatrak. Robinson. 412-489-5631. THUNDERBIRD CAFE. Pigeons GATEWAY CLIPPER FLEET. Playing Ping Pong, Derek Woodz Jill West & Blues Attack. Band. Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177. Station Square. 412-355-7980. HAMBONE’S. The Park Plan, Joe T, Brazillian Wax. CLUB CAFE. Jacob Klein & Josh Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318. Herbert. South Side. 412-431-4950. HARD ROCK CAFE. Vibro Kings, HEINZ FIELD. Totally 80s. Brownie Mary. Station Square. North Side. 412-697-7700. 412-481-7625. HOWLERS COYOTE CAFE. PR7X HOWLERS COYOTE CAFE. LIVE II. Pirate Radio Live Broadcast Live Band Punk Rock Karaoke. & Perfomances. Bloomfield. Bloomfield. 412-682-0320. 412-682-0320. LATITUDE 360. ‘Tribute to the Magic of Elvis’. Don Obusek & Hilde in a Pre New Year’s Eve Party. Some of the proceeds will benefit Little Sisters of the Poor. North Fayette. 412-331-5897. REX THEATER. Dopapod. South Side. 412-381-6811. THUNDERBIRD CAFE. Nik Westman, Andre Costello & Chet Vincent. Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177.

SAT 27

FULL LIST ONLINE

SUN 28

MP 3 MONDAY

{PHOTO COURTESY OF TONY PAESANO}

BILL JASPER ACOUSTICS

MON 29 JERGEL’S RHYTHM GRILLE. Rusted Root. Warrendale. 724-799-8333.

TUE 30 CLUB CAFE. Legend Fish. South Side. 412-431-4950. THUNDERBIRD CAFE. City Dwelling Nature Seekers, Meeting of Important People. Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177.

WED 31 ALTAR BAR. TEN (Pearl Jam Tribute) & RATM2, Supervana (Nirvana Tribute). Strip District. 412-263-2877. BELVEDERE’S. Harlan Twins, The Lopez, Dream Phone. Lawrenceville. 412-687-2555. DOUBLE TREE HILTON MOON TWP. Jill West & Blues Attack. Moon. 724-888-6183. HOWLERS COYOTE CAFE. Molly Alphabet & Friends. Bloomfield. 412-682-0320.

Each week, we bring you a new track from a local artist. This week’s offering comes from Bill Jasper Acoustics; stream or download

“Keep On Keepin’ On” for free on our music blog, FFW>>, at pghcitypaper.com.

CONTINUES ON PG. 32

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CONCERTS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 31

Work yourself into a lather. Rinse. Repeat.

ELWOOD’S PUB. Marshall Street ‘Rents. 724-265-1181.

SAT 27

Indigo Girls

{THU., APRIL 30}

Indigo Girls with Pittsburgh Symphony Orchestra Heinz Hall, 600 Penn Ave., Downtown

FRI 26 BRILLOBOX. Boogie-Funk Party w/ DJ Bus Crates. Bloomfield. 412-621-4900. THE CLOAKROOM. DJ SMI. East Liberty. 412-779-2624. DRUM BAR. DJ Digital Dave. North Side. 412-231-7777. THE NEW AMSTERDAM. Da Admiral. Lawrenceville. 412-682-6414. ONE 10 LOUNGE. DJ Goodnight, DJ Rojo. Downtown. 412-874-4582. REGINA ELENA CLUB. DJ Ron Hopkinson. Sharpsburg. 412-781-0229. ROWDY BUCK. Top 40 Dance. South Side. 412-431-2825. RUGGER’S PUB. 80s Night w/ DJ Connor. South Side. 412-381-1330.

DIESEL. DJ CK. South Side. 412-431-8800. DRUM BAR. DJ Kingfish. North Side. 412-231-7777. GUS’S CAFE. Pittsburgh Caribbean/International Saturdays. Lawrenceville. 412-315-7271. ROWDY BUCK. Top 40 Dance. South Side. 412-431-2825. S BAR. Pete Butta. South Side. 412-481-7227. WINGHART’S - OAKLAND. Steel City Sundays. W/ DJ Goodnight. Oakland. 412-874-4582.

MON 29 ALTAR BAR. Feed Me - DJ Set. Strip District. 412-263-2877.

TUE 30 BZ’S BAR & GRILL. TwoStep Tuesdays feat. Groove Pharmacy. North Side. 412-323-2924.

WED 31 CABARET AT THEATER SQUARE. Ritmo Wednesdays. DJ Juan Diego, DJ Carla. Downtown. 412-325-6769. ROUND CORNER CANTINA. No Mames New Years Eve: : Uproot Andy, PANDEMIC, Edgar Um. Lawrenceville. 412-251-6058.

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

FRI 26

THU 25 BELVEDERE’S. Neon w/ DJ hatesyou. 80s Night. Lawrenceville. 412-687-2555. CLUB TABOO. DJ Matt & Gangsta Shak. Homewood. 412-969-0260.

ANDYS. Jazz at Andys Quartet feat. Tania Grubbs. Downtown. 412-773-8884. CAFE IO. Dave Brosky. Playing the Chapman Stick. Mt. Lebanon. 412-440-0414. RIVERS CLUB. Jessica Lee & Friends. Downtown. 412-391-5227. VILLAGE TAVERN & TRATTORIA. The Dante’ Soulsville Project. West End. 412-458-0417.

ACOUSTIC

DJS

SAT 27

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EARLY WARNINGS {PHOTO COURTESY OF JEREMY COWART}

blogh.pghcitypaper.com

MOONDOG’S. Norman Nardini. Norm Year’s Eve. Blawnox. 412-828-2040. NORTH PARK CLUBHOUSE. Austin Drive Band. Robinson. 724-449-9090. OAKS THEATER. Steeltown Religion. Oakmont. 412-828-6322. THE R BAR. The Accelerators. Dormont. 412-942-0882. RAMADA INN HOTEL & CONFERENCE CENTER. Switch,Twisted Fate. Greensburg. 724-552-0603. STAGE AE. Girl Talk, Freeway, The Gotobeds. North Side. 412-229-5483. TRUST ARTS EDUCATION CENTER. Joy Ike. Downtown.

{TUE., MAY 05}

Joe Pug Club Café, 56 S. 12th St., South Side

SPOON. Spoon Fed. Hump day chill. House music. aDesusParty. East Liberty. 412-362-6001.

BLUES SAT 27

JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & SPEAKEASY. Roger Humphries Jam Session. North Side. 412-904-3335. OMNI WILLIAM PENN. Frank Cunimondo, Pat Crossly. Downtown. 412-553-5235.

MOONDOG’S. Billy Price. Blawnox. 412-828-2040. NOLA ON THE SQUARE. Olga ANDYS. Lisa Bleil. Downtown. Watkins. Downtown. 412-471-9100. 412-773-8884. SMOKEHOUSE BAR & LEMONT. Dr. Zoot. GRILLE. Miss Freddye. Beechview. Mt. Washington. 412-431-3100. 412-344-8700. NOLA ON THE SQUARE. Benny SPEAL’S TAVERN. Ron & The Benack Quartet. Downtown. RumpShakers. 724-433-1322. 412-471-9100. TAMBELLINI BRIDGEVILLE OMNI WILLIAM PENN. RESTAURANT. The Witchdoctors. Frank Cunimondo/Pat Crossly. Bridgeville. 412-221-5202. Downtown. 412-553-5235. TUGBOAT’S. Tim Woods Band & Friends. feat. ANDYS. Tania Guitar Zack, Randall Grubbs. Downtown. Troy, Mr.B, Harmonica w. w w 412-773-8884. Matt. East Pittsburgh. er hcitypap g p THE CLOAKROOM. 412-829-1992. .com Hill Jordan & the Slide Worldwide. East Liberty. NOLA ON THE SQUARE. Sweaty LEMONT. Dave Crisci. Betty. Downtown. 412-471-9100. Mt. Washington. 412-431-3100. VILLAGE TAVERN & TRATTORIA. Tony Campbell & Jazzsurgery. JIMMY Z’S PLACE. Bobby West End. 412-458-0417. Hawkins Back Alley Blues. Bellevue. 412-766-3110. NOLA ON THE SQUARE. John OMNI WILLIAM PENN. Gresh’s Gris Gris. Downtown. Frank Cunimondo. Downtown. 412-471-9100. 412-553-5235.

FRI 26

FULL SAT 27 LIST E ONLIN

TUE 30

WED 31

SUN 28

JAZZ THU 25 ANDYS. Andys Trio. Christmas Brunch. Downtown. 412-773-8884. CAVO. Carlton Leeper, Lito Corpuz Victoria Brady, Patrick Whitehead. Strip District. 412-610-1384.

MON 29 ECLIPSE LOUNGE. Open Jazz Night w/ the Howie Alexander Trio. Lawrenceville. 412-251-0097.

WED 31 ANDORA RESTAURANT. Harry Cardillo. Mars. 412-967-1900.

CLUB CAFE. Brooke Annibale, Kevin Garrett (Early). South Side. 412-431-4950. OLIVE OR TWIST. The Vagrants. Downtown. 412-255-0525.

WED 31 ALLEGHENY ELKS LODGE #339. Pittsburgh Banjo Club. Wednesdays. North Side. 412-321-1834. HAMBONE’S. 2nd Annual Acousticafe Showcase & NYE Open Mic. Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318. PARK HOUSE. Shelf Life String Band. North Side. 412-224-2273.

WORLD SUN 28 CARNEGIE LIBRARY, OAKLAND. David Shelow. Oakland. 412-622-3116.

REGGAE FRI 26 CAPRI PIZZA AND BAR. Bombo Claat Friday Reggae w/ VYBZ Machine Intl Sound System. East Liberty. 412-362-1250.

OTHER MUSIC MON 29 HAMBONE’S. Cabaret: Showtunes, Jazz Standards & Blues by Ian Kane. Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318.

WED 31 CABARET AT THEATER SQUARE. Hello Donny: A Showtunes Sing-Along. http://trustarts.culturaldistrict. org/event/3941/hello-donny-ashowtunes-sing-along. Downtown. 412-325-6769. LEMONT. Judi Figel & Dave Crisci, Groove Doctors. Mt. Washington. 412-431-3100.

HOLIDAY MUSIC WED 31 AMERICAN LEGION POST NO. 701. The Holidays w/ Southside Jerry. McKeesport. 412-798-3046.


What to do

PAID ADVERTORIAL SPONSORED BY

IN PITTSBURGH

December 24 - 30 Badboxes

CATTIVO Lawrenceville. 412-687-2157. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketfly. com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 10p.m.

Frank Nicotero's Blue XXXmas Comedy Shows PITTSBURGH WINERY Strip District. Over 21 show. Tickets: showclix.com. 7:30p.m. & 10:30p.m.

Comedian Chuck Krieger LATITUDE 360 Robinson Twp. 412-693-5555. Tickets: latitude360.com/pittsburgh-pa. Through Dec. 27.

Harlem Globetrotters CONSOL ENERGY CENTER Downtown. Tickets: ticketmaster. com or 1-800-745-3000. 1p.m. & 6p.m.

The Clarks

The Seas" Record Release Show

Cirque Dreams Holidaze, Gingerbread Cookies. Courtesy of Cirque Productions

FRIDAY 26

Cirque Dreams Holidaze

ALTAR BAR Strip District. 412-263-2877. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 6:30p.m.

REX THEATER South Side. 412-381-6811. Over 21 show. Tickets: greyareaprod.com. 7:30p.m.

Ali Spagnola's Farewell Power Hour, The Final Drinking Game Concert in Pgh CLUB CAFE South Side.

412-431-4950. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 10:15p.m.

Bill Deasy's Annual Boxing Day Show

Tropidelic w/ Stationary Pebbles

CLUB CAFE South Side. 412-431-4950. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 7p.m.

THUNDERBIRD CAFE Lawrenceville. 412-682-0177. Over 21 show. Tickets: greyareaprod.com. 9p.m.

SATURDAY 27

REX THEATER South Side. 412-381-6811. Over 17 show. Tickets: greyareaprod.com. 9p.m.

MONDAY 29

HARD ROCK CAFE Station Square. 412-481-ROCK. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 10:30p.m.

JERGEL'S RHYTHM GRILLE Warrendale. 724-799-8333. Tickets: jergels.com. 8p.m.

Rusted Root

Cirque Dreams Holidaze

MR. SMALLS THEATRE Millvale. 412-821-4447. All ages show. Featuring Katie Hate and Friends, Scene Stage the World & more. Tickets: 866-468-3401 or ticketweb.com/opusone 6:30p.m.

BENEDUM CENTER Downtown. 412-456-6666. Tickets: trustarts.org. Through Dec. 30.

Brooke Annibale / Kevin Garrett

Locally Grown: Pittsburgh Producers's Party

CLUB CAFE South Side. 412-431-4950. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketweb.com/opusone. 7p.m.

SUNDAY 28

Camp Element "Empty

Dopapod w/ Consider the Source

Vibro Kings / Brownie Mary (Reunion Show)

Punk the Halls Xmas Party Show

DECEMBER 29-30 BENEDUM CENTER

newbalancepittsburgh.com

TUESDAY 30

REX THEATER South Side. 412-381-6811. Over 17 show. Tickets: greyareaprod.com. 8p.m.

DOWNLOAD THE FUN & FREE CP HAPPS APP TO FIND THE MOST POPULAR EVENTS IN PITTSBURGH

l l i r h T he Gift of t

WEXFORD

10616 PERRY HWY 724-940-2400

WATERFRONT 112 W. BRIDGE ST 412-464-1002

OAKLAND

3810 FORBES AVE 412-697-1333 FACEBOOK.COM/ NEWBALANCEPGH

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RETELLINGS {BY HARRY KLOMAN}

TIM BURTON’S MOST ENJOYABLE FILM IN YEARS: AMUSING, HEARTFELT AND THOUGHTFUL

Stephen Sondheim and James Lapine’s stage musical Into the Woods — a mash-up of Red Riding Hood, Cinderella, Jack (and his beanstalk), Rapunzel, et al. — takes its cues more from William Blake than from Wilhelm Grimm. Act I is Songs of Innocence — into the woods they go, where they delight in some tantalizing new adventures. Act II is Songs of Experience, where they learn that actions have consequences, and that knowledge is a dangerous thing.

Witchy woman: Meryl Streep

As directed by Rob Marshall (Chicago), and performed with vigor by Meryl Streep (as the witch), James Corden, Christine Baranski, Chris Pine (as a prince “raised to be charming, not sincere”) and others, the new film version is playful and agreeable, if a bit long in the tooth (oh, and Johnny Depp as the wolf). It assumes our awareness of genre, and so largely eschews the impulse to go meta. (Best number: Prince C. and his brother compete in song to be the more lovesick). Marshall ably makes his actors focus on the story’s touching tales of familial love, romantic longing, parental error and the immutable sadness of real life (a Sondheim standard). But the play tripleunderlines all of its themes, and it certainly felt fresher when it arrived on Broadway in 1987. As a film in 2014, it’s suitable entertainment, if you’ll let it be. Starts Thu., Dec. 25. INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

Santa’s bag was simply too full of movies opening during Christmas week, so look for Al Hoff’s

“2014 Film in Review” online at www.pghcitypaper.com.

What list did this pair make?

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BUT IS IT ART? {BY AL HOFF}

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IM BURTON’S latest film, Big Eyes, is both a bio-pic of Walter and Margaret Keane, 1960s artists famed for their sentimental “big-eye” portraits, and a celebration of the space such works inhabited: the oft-sneered-at lower rungs of popular culture. It’s also a bit of a legal thriller and a mild critique of the challenges faced by women — even creative and hard-working ones — in the 1950s and ’60s. If you’re burned out on Burton’s usual fare — pointless remakes, tarted up with extravagant sets and a bewigged Johnny Depp — come forward. This is Burton’s most enjoyable film in years: a straightm forward story that’s amusing and heartfelt fo on the surface, with additional thoughtful fu layers for pondering the nature of art and an commerce. The acting, the sets, the dialogue, the candy-color-saturated film — di everything teeters on the kicky edge of ev silly sil without succumbing to it. The tale is simple: In the late 1950s, divorced single mom Margaret (Amy Addiv ams) am moves to San Francisco and, there in its Beatnik poseur belly, meets artist

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

The eyes have it: Margaret Keane (Amy Adams)

Walter Keane (Christoph Waltz). Walter paints generic Paris street scenes, but encourages Margaret with her portraits of doe-eyed kids and stray cats. The glib Walter is a better pitchman than artist, and it is simply more convenient for him to take public credit for the increasingly popular big-eye works that Margaret dutifully turns out. And so it goes for nearly a decade, until Margaret pushes back — and you won’t believe how the courtroom drama plays out.

BIG EYES DIRECTED BY: Tim Burton STARRING: Amy Adams, Christoph Waltz Starts Thu., Dec. 25

CP APPROVED But this isn’t just a domestic melodrama and art fraud, because the means of production matters a lot here. The Keanes’ fortune is amassed by churning out cheap poster and cardboard facsimiles of the paintings, not in the selling of original works. Such marketing secures the big-eye

works widespread popularity, and represents one form of value. Burton, a noted aficionado and producer of popular entertainment, cheerfully celebrates this low-brow populism. The film quotes Warhol: “I think what Keane has done is just terrific. If it were bad, so many people wouldn’t like it.” (Full disclosure: I once owned and displayed in my home more than 50 pieces of big-eye art.) These days, popular “bad” art that people like — from Thomas Kinkade to memegenerating apps — carries a far bigger stick than fine art, and while the disagreements linger, the cultural skirmishes are few. In our times, Walter’s keen appreciation for mass marketing, ancillary products and media manipulation would be celebrated. Big Eyes notes this appreciatively, despite Walter’s obvious villainy. But the film reserves its full-throated support for Margaret, for women in art, for artists to be rightfully acknowledged and compensated. And for all of us who simply like what we like, no matter how kitschy, or highminded, it is. A H OF F @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM


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BEST ACTRESS • REESE WITHERSPOON

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SCREEN ACTORS GUILD AWARD NOMINEE

THE GAMBLER. Mark Wahlberg stars in this drama about a college professor whose risky gambling habits put in him the sights of gangsters. Rupert Wyatt directs. Starts Thu., Dec. 25. GOODBYE TO ALL THAT. Fortyish and mostly clueless dad Otto (Paul Schneider) is surprised when his wife (Melanie Lynskey) asks for a divorce. And — oh ho! — is he even more surprised by the wacky world of dating in these hook-up friendly times. Apparently, all the women out there are good-looking, sex-crazed and/or variously neurotic. Not surprisingly, this dramedy was written and directed by a guy, Angus MacLachlan, and besides not giving us any worthy female characters, also fails to create any sympathy for Otto. The film has a story worth telling — it’s a coming-of-age tale for a middle-aged dude who needs to wise up — but it never makes Otto’s situation credible. 7:30 p.m. Fri., Dec. 26; 7 p.m. Sat., Dec. 27; and 4 p.m. Sun., Dec. 28. Hollywood (AH) THE IMITATION GAME. Seems like every year around the holidays, Santa (or Father Christmas, if you prefer) delivers one of those sturdy British crowd-pleasers: a period dramedy (often adapted from true events), with tip-top actors, perfectly aged tweeds and a feel-good, lightly inspirational and/or educational vibe. Think: The Iron Lady, The King’s Speech. The package this year —Morten Tyldum’s bio-pic about the influential mathematician Alan Turing — is just as prettily wrapped. But once opened, it’s not quite as packed as one hoped, and a bit depressing to boot.

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The King and the Mockingbird Turing, whose personal life was marked by depression and presumably a lot of conflicted feelings about his identity. I say presumably, because while the film drops hints and Cumberbatch finely emits a lot of buttoned-up something, Turing’s inner life remains unexplored. Still, it’s a fine trip out for the holidays — a mostly solid piece of entertainment, in which you will learn about: the fascinating Enigma project (top secret until only just recently); the man who built an early computer; how technology can leap ahead in ways cultural tolerance cannot; and that the oddly featured Mr. Cumberbatch does make a more interesting leading man than the usual square-jawed set. Starts Thu., Dec. 25 (AH) THE KING AND THE MOCKINGBIRD. Animator Paul Grimault and writer Jacques Prevert collaborated on this fanciful, funny and beautifully illustrated retelling of Hans Christian Andersen’s “The Shepherdess and the Chimney Sweep.” The tale of two portraits that come to life and are forced to flee an evil king, with the help of a clever mockingbird, is simple enough to keep kids engaged, but charming enough for adults, who might ferret out the political satire. (Not surprisingly, the mockingbird speaks a number of languages, including “toucan, of course.”) The animated classic was released in a shortened version in 1952, but was re-assembled by Grimault and re-released in 1980. 4 p.m. shows are dubbed in English; later shows are in French, with subtitles. Starts Fri., Dec. 26. Regent Square (AH)

CHECK LOCAL LISTINGS FOR NOW PLAYING IN THEATRES EVERYWHERE THEATRES AND SHOWTIMES

GOLDEN GLOBE ® AWARD NOMINATIONS ORIGINAL SONG BEST ACTOR BEST ACTRESS BEST “ ”

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NATIONAL GALLERY. As expected from a director fascinated with how institutions work, parts of Frederick Wiseman’s three-hour documentary about Britain’s National Gallery do go behind the scenes of this world-class art museum, noted for its collection of classical paintings. There’s talk of money, hanging exhibits, managing crowds, cleaning floors. And winding through some scenes is the trickier issue of how do you engage the public in such an amazing historical and cultural (and free) resource, without coming across as elitist (the word “ensanguined” is dropped casually while discussing a painting with visitors), or compromising the institution’s value, as pondered in a meeting about a possible partnership with the London marathon. Part of that outreach is simply talking about the art — in tours, classrooms, restoration studios — and here the film viewer gets a bonus. Perhaps half the film is having some engaging art historian guide you through a painting, be it its construction, provenance or interpretation. However, you should not cross

CHRISTOPH WALTZ

During World War II, Turing (Benedict Cumberbatch, mastering a number of vocal and physical tics) is hired to help break “Enigma,” a code-generating machine with which the Nazis are sending their strategic commands. Turing is an odd sort to lead a military team — he has no social skills and is secretly gay — but he’s undisputedly the best nerd for the job: It’s he who correctly realizes it will take another machine — not a human or even a 100 humans — to defeat Enigma. The egghead thriller narrative is entertaining, as a tea-drinking crew in handknit sweaters takes on a tricky bit of German engineering, with the stakes being hundreds of thousands of lives saved. The film is murkier on

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CRITICS ’ CHOICE AWARD NOMINEE

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“visiting the National Gallery” off your bucket list, because, as the film depicts, there’s much to be gained from seeing the work in person, and seeing it in the presence of others. It is all about looking, looking together, and processing the visual into the emotional — in painting, so as in film. And in this regard, Wiseman’s film is a rather sly house of mirrors, in which we watch a film and, within that film, we watch others gaze at a painting, while also joining them in that act. Not to be outdone, many of the paintings — their subjects commissioned portraits, or figures of myth and Christianity — stare just as intently back at us. Across so many centuries and miles, and conveyed through the largely two-dimensional mediums of paint and film, there is a discernible connection running from portrait subject through gallery visitor to film viewer. One need only look. Starts Fri., Dec. 26. Harris (AH) NIGHT AT THE MUSUEM: SECRET OF THE TOMB. Shawn Levy directs this third iteration of the series about museum exhibits that come to life after hours. Now, the ancient Egyptian tile that creates this magical transformation is running out of juice, and Larry (Ben Stiller) and a small gang of nocturnal regulars, including Teddy Roosevelt (Robin Williams)

Films: Casablanca (guy runs a bar in Morocco during World War II; romance, espionage, comedy and many quotable lines), Dec. 26-Jan. 1. Old Boy (twisty 2003 Korean thriller, with revenge, suspense and octopus), Dec. 26-Jan. 1. Vertigo (Alfred Hitchcock’s 1958 thriller, set in San Francisco and starring Jimmy Stewart and Kim Novak; one of Hitch’s best), Dec. 26-28 and Dec. 28-Jan. 1. Fight Club (if there were a fight club, it might look like David Fincher’s psychological thriller from 1999, starring Ed Norton and Brad Pitt), Dec. 26-Jan. 1. Call or see website for times and complete listings. 4115 Butler St., Lawrenceville. $5-9. 412-904-3225 or www.rowhousecinema.com

National Gallery enslaved Hebrews.) Not much new here, though it moves frantically enough to probably keep the kiddies entertained. In his final on-screen role, it’s not much of a send-off for Williams, who seems uncharacteristically flat. (AH)

Unbroken and tiny diorama buddies (Steve Coogan, Owen Wilson), must travel to the British Museum to get it recharged. Needless, to say, this simply repeats the premise of the first film, as exhibits in the London museum come to life for the first time, notably Sir Lancelot (Dan Stevens) and a pharaoh (Ben Kingsley). (At the megaplex this week, see Kingsley play both pharaoh and, in Exodus, leader of the pharaoh’s

UNBROKEN. The life experiences of Louis Zamperini would seem perfect for a film (or two). Son of immigrant Italians, he was an Olympic medalist as a teenager. Later, he served as a bombardier in the Pacific theater in World War II. He survived an at-sea plane crash, and more than a month floating in a lifeboat. But he was rescued by the Japanese and sent to POW camps, where he endured sadistic treatment

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REPERTORY ROW HOUSE CINEMA. Our First Christmas series: Elf (Will Ferrell stars as an oversized Santa’s helper in this 2003 comedy), Dec. 24-25. Home Alone (1990 classic combines Christmas, burglary and a plucky kid), Dec. 24-25. Christmas Vacation (nothing goes right for the Griswold family holiday in this 1989 comedy starring Chevy Chase), Dec. 24-25. Die Hard (it’s an action-packed Christmas as Bruce Willis battles some terrorists in a L.A. skyscraper), Dec. 24-25. Must-See

HEAD. The Monkees star in Bob Rafelson’s trippy, non-narrative 1968 psychedelic comedy which, frankly, doesn’t make a lot of sense (it’s not supposed to, man), but is a hoot if you’re in the mood. Hopefully, the loopy vibe will be enhanced by The Gothees, Pittsburgh’s own bubble-gum goth band, who will perform live, dressed as The Monkees. 7:30 p.m. Tue., Dec. 30. Hollywood. $10

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

CP

White Christmas (1954) - 12/24 @ 4:00pm & 7:00pm A holiday classic, starring Bing Crosby, music and lyrics by Irving Berlin.

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Goodbye To All That (2014)

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Blade Runner (1982)

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BLADE RUNNER. In this season of forgiveness, let’s put aside Ridley Scott’s recent Exodus, and focus on his stylish 1982 sci-fi noir that eerily predicted some of the future we’re living in now. It’s an urban dystopia, set in 2019 Los Angeles, in which men, menmachine combos and giant corporations struggle for self-determination. Its neon-lit nights, dark alleys and smoggy drizzle look best on a big screen, so grab this opportunity. 10 p.m. Fri., Dec. 26; 9:30 p.m. Sat., Dec. 27; 7 p.m. Sun., Dec. 28; and 7 p.m. Wed., Dec. 31. Hollywood (AH)

CP

KIRIKOU AND THE SORCERESS. This featurelength 1998 animation by Guinean-born filmmaker Michel Ocelot (dubbed in English) vividly adapts a West African folk tale about a sorceress’ confrontation with a village whose interests are championed by a plucky, wise and ultra-precocious newborn named Kirikou. Presented by Sembene — The Film and Arts Festival, which shows films of the African diaspora. Also screening is an episode of the Wayans brothers’ animated kids’ TV series Thugaboo. 1:30 p.m. Sat., Dec. 27. Carnegie Library of Homewood, 7101 Hamilton Ave., Homewood. Free. www.sembenefilmfestival.org (BO)

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until the end of the war. A survivor against all sorts of physical and psychological odds, Zamperini lived to be 97, dying earlier this year. With such dramatic and emotional resonant material, I feared Angelina Jolie’s bio-pic of Zamperini would be the standard retinue of “real-life inspirational,” with easily identified stock characters, rousing (if clichéd) dialogue and lots of soaring music, designed to make us feel happy/sad/uplifted/etc. While handsomely filmed and featuring decent enough actors, Unbroken is almost the opposite of what I expected. Characters are unnamed and unknowable; even Zamperini (Jack O’Connell) remains a determined set of facial features, revealing little emotion other than grit. Beyond the harrowing crash, Unbroken is short on action, but Jolie never fills the space by developing characters and relationships, or humanizing the experiences beyond the depiction of physical discomfort. In the end, it’s a respectful look at Zamperini’s remarkable experiences that is emotionally distant, flat and even, at times, boring. Starts Thu., Dec. 25 (AH)

WHITE CHRISTMAS. Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye are a pair of entertainers who travel to Vermont with two singing sisters (Rosemary Clooney and VeraEllen) for the holidays. Besides the title song, Michael Curtiz’s 1954 film includes other Irving Berlin classics such as “Count Your Blessings Instead of Sheep” and “Blue Skies.” 7 p.m. Wed., Dec. 24. Hollywood

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The Rocky Horror Picture Show - 12/27 @ Midnight Head (1968) 12/30 @ 7:30pm

The Monkees -- Mickey Dolenz, Mike Nesmith, Davey Jones, and Peter Tork -- didn’t really enjoy being labelled the pre-Fab Four. They expressed their displeasure in this non-sequitur masterpiece! Also live music by the Gothees. $10 admission.


[DANCE]

IT WAS A CROSS BETWEEN A TRAINED-ANIMAL SHOW AND A DADA PERFORMANCE

CAPTIV8 {BY STEVE SUCATO} In order of performance, eight dance productions that left local audiences captivated: 3 X 3. Pittsburgh Ballet Theatre’s program at the August Wilson Center charmed with Julia Adams’ cleverly crafted “Ketubah,” inspired by Marc Chagall’s art about Jewish wedding rituals; the world premiere of Viktor Plotnikov’s marvelously inventive contemporary ballet “In Your Eyes”; and a reprise of Dwight Rhoden’s sultry 2007 jazz-cabaret ballet “Smoke ’n Roses.” THE SECRET HISTORY OF LOVE. San Francisco-based transgender choreographer Sean Dorsey’s dance-theater work was inspired by stories collected during a two-year national LGBT Elders Oral History Project. Performed at the Kelly-Strayhorn Theater by Sean Dorsey Dance, it used fullthrottle, athletic modern-dance choreography and heartfelt moments to challenge audience perceptions of human love. AT THE BYHAM. The Conservatory Dance Company, Point Park’s student troupe, excelled in this program featuring George Balanchine’s masterpiece “Serenade,” Dwight Rhoden’s thought-provoking “Mercy,” an excerpt from Martha Graham’s stirring anti-fascism work “Chronicle,” and David Parson’s modern masterwork “Wolfgang,” to music by Mozart. FAR. Award-winning British choreographer Wayne McGregor’s contemporary ballet was inspired by the Enlightenment and anatomical images from Diderot’s encyclopedia. The Pittsburgh Dance Council show, performed at the Byham by Wayne McGregor/Random Dance, came together with engrossing dance movement created through neuroscience. PARALLEL LIVES. At the New Hazlett Theater, CorningWorks dancer/choreographer Beth Corning and former Bill T. Jones/Arnie Zane Dance Company principal dancer Arthur Aviles thoughtfully explored a growing discontent with technology as a replacement for human interaction. The dance-theater work turned a mirror on our not-so-utopian connected world. AS I REMEMBER IT. Iconic dancer, choreographer and actress Carmen De Lavallade’s self-portrait told through dance, film and personal writings. The show, at the Kelly-Strayhorn, traced her sevendecade career working with other greats and her battles overcoming racism. ASPEN SANTA FE BALLET. The touring troupe’s exquisite dancers enthralled in three contemporary ballets at the Byham. The Pittsburgh Dance Council show included Norbert de la Cruz III’s pensive “Square None,” Cayetano Soto’s darkly emotional “Beautiful Mistake,” and Nicolo Fonte’s heartfelt “The Heart(s)pace.” A CANTANKEROUS WIEGENLIED. Andre Koslowski’s TanzTheater/Andre Koslowski brought a European dancetheater aesthetic to this surreal, prop-laden work at the Kelly-Strayhorn. Quirky and intense characters failed at attempts to communicate, conjuring images of a broken mind trying unsuccessfully to process grief.

transformed the somewhat ornate hallway into a three-dimensional canvas. Make that four-dimensional, because the thrilling part {BY ROBERT RACZKA} was that as you moved around the space, it was continually reconfigured, not unlike moving around in “the real world.” Once you’d been to St. Anthony’s Chapel to see the self-described “world’s largest collection of relics outside of the Vatican,” there wasn’t a lot of reason to head back up Troy Hill. Until, that is, neighborhood resident and art collector Evan Mirapaul commissioned German {PHOTO COURTESY OF LAILA ARCHULETA} artist Thorsten Brinkmann to transform Tucker Marder and Daniel Allende’s For the Birds, at the National Aviary an abandoned house into La Hütte Royal, a hybrid installation that includes plenty ITTSBURGH’S ART scene keeps status at home and the fact that there’s of artworks, arrangements that might growing in venues, events and no shortage of talent. That vision held for or might not be artworks exactly but are variety, including performances, several Biennials and through several cu- part of a larger artwork, plus an optional, pop-ups, evolving exhibits, crowdsourc- rators, but no more. Still, there were lots of pleasurably disorienting crawling journey ing, interactivity, etc. No one can catch Pittsburgh artists included and plenty that through the house for any viewer who is it all, so consider these outside-the-box was ambitious, adventuresome and occa- game. Playful and possibly profound, in a examples as representative and not the sionally unexpected — none more so than class of its own. (The exhibit is ongoing, result of a comprehensive survey. Anna Mikolay’s geometric wall painting at with visitations by appointment at I preferred the more focused original the Pittsburgh Center for the Art’s iteration lahuetteroyal@gmail.com.) vision for the Pittsburgh Biennial as show- of the Biennial (Aug. 15-Nov. 2). Loitering Ali Momeni and Jenny Schmid’s Drawing casing only artists living and working in outside of the galleries proper, Mikolay’s use Gutless Warrior, at Artists Image Resource Pittsburgh, given their perpetual underdog of rectilinear shapes and a few bright colors on March 2, was presented in conjunction

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Ali Momeni and Jenny Schmid’s Drawing Gutless Warrior, at Artists Image Resource

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Register Today for the

New Semester e er

OPEN HOUSE!

January 4 ‡ 12:00-2:00pm Try FREE classes! Including Acting, Musical Theater, and Creative Theater. Visit pittsburghCLO.org for a complete schedule

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

with Carnegie Mellon University’s DRAW 2014 Symposium. Momeni and Schmid’s drawing-and-projection performance was a short-term stand-alone interactive artwork. Technologically based and participatory, every element not only worked together, but it was transparent enough to be grasped. Audience members were invited to don one of the provided masks, perform a brief action (a spin, a dance step, an unexpected movement) that was videotaped and projected onto the wall along with others. The mask left people looser than late-night karaoke, and a changing panel of artists did spontaneous sketches that were added to the projected images along with labels such as “Worthless Billionaire.” It was a fine example of what is now called a platform — not quite a performance by an artist and not quite an exhibit. Rather, this artist-created, flexible system solicited audience input and yielded changing output. Observe, participate, stay a minute or an hour, it was up to you. Like it or not — and the audience did indeed like it — this is where at least some art’s been headed. For the Birds occupied the National Aviary’s FliteZone Theater on May 5 and 11. A cross between a trained-animal show and a Dada performance, “For the Birds” was the brainchild of Tucker Marder and Daniel Allende, who enlisted lots of help from friends, acquaintances and Aviary staff, including skilled bird trainers, not to mention a macaw, a hawk, a snowy owl and vultures that flew freely within the theater. Marder and Allende represent a growing contingent of artists who are not performance artists as such but produce performances as a part of their art practice, while also making things. “For the Birds” featured outlandish costumes, percussion and movement, and birds doing bird tricks, all somehow tied together into what felt to me like an alien culture. The Cultural District was already looking pretty snazzy with public art, spruced up façades, dramatic uplighting and maturing trees. Wood Street Galleries’ Murray Horne (who, among other things, started the Pittsburgh Biennial) decided to do something about the lack of enough things to lock a bike to by commissioning artists to do something creative in a permanent, very public art form. Generously funded by the Colcom Foundation (disclosure: I was a member of the unpaid selection panel), the bike racks, permanently installed throughout the Cultural District, are clever, attractive and useful, and celebrate local artists while putting some money in their pockets. From what I hear, there may be more bike racks on the way, and more of a lot of this other stuff, too. Cheers to that, even if I won’t manage to see all of it. INF O @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

[STAGE]

CLASSICS REDUX {BY MICHELLE PILECKI} What makes a classic? Whole libraries could be filled with essays, arguments and philosophical treatises on the subject, but for our purposes, “the test of time” suffices. All too often, “classic” means “tired old chestnut.” Sometimes, though, the spark of what made a play great in the first place comes through. Here are seven, in order of original presentation: AN ILIAD. Homer’s epic poem (c. 1260 BCE) became a stunning oneman showcase of strenuous storytelling by Teagle F. Bougere in Pittsburgh Public Theater’s production of the 2012 reimagining by Lisa Peterson and Denis O’Hare, directed by Jesse Berger. AGAMEMNON. University of Pittsburgh Stages recreated Aeschylus’ tragedy (458 BCE, translated by British poet Ted Hughes) as glorious pageant filled with poetry, madness and a studied use of color. Directed by Dennis Schebetta.

FIXING KING JOHN. Granted, No Name Players’ Fixing King John {PHOTO COURTESY OF LUKE BRUEHLMAN}

PITTSBURGH CLO ACADEMY ADEMY

Shakespeare’s history play King John (c. 1596) is not so well known these days. But No Name Players’ production of playwright Kirk Lynn’s rewrite was funny, fast and profane — with grit and power tools. Directed by Steven Wilson. A STREETCAR NAMED DESIRE. Barebones Productions and director Melissa Martin kept the focus on Tennessee Williams’ greatest heroine and her tragic “otherness” in a pulsating 1947 New Orleans slum. Tami Dixon delivered a masterful, multi-layered performance as Blanche. WAITING FOR GODOT. PICT Classic Theatre put the accent on the first syllable and on a smooth delivery — both verbally and physically — of Samuel Beckett’s 1949 absurdist comedy. Aoife Spillane-Hinks directed a perfect Pittsburgh-based cast: Martin Giles, James FitzGerald, Alan Stanford and Ken Bolden. THE FANTASTICKS. Opera Theater SummerFest produced this cozy little wisp of a show with warmth, gentle humor, lovely voices and delicate movement, directed and choreographed by Peter Kope. The world’s longest-running musical opened in 1960, with music by Harvey Schmidt and libretto by Tom Jones. SEVEN GUITARS. Carnegie Mellon University’s School of Drama produced a perfect chord of talent — actors, designers, et al. — for August Wilson’s 1996 tale of poetry, anger, hope and despair in 1948’s Hill District. Director Cameron Knight had choreographic help from the inimitable Tomé Cousin. INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM


CELEBRANTS

[BOOKS]

FICTIONS

{BY TED HOOVER}

{BY BILL O’DRISCOLL}

{PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

Robin Abramson (left) and Erika Cuenca in Off the Wall’s Or,

[PLAY REVIEWS]

AGE D’OR

& White — Pittsburgh Playwrights Theatre Company’s annual celebration of local writers — Kim El debuted Ubuntu Holiday, her one-act about a family’s Kwanzaa gathering. She’s since turned the work into a full-length play that Playwrights is presenting (in rotation with Ray Werner’s A Christmas Star) through year’s end. The original concerned the Owens family, who a few years prior had started celebrating Kwanzaa in hopes of both creating a deeper connection to their African heritage and stepping away from the consumerist orgy Christmas has become. This change caused problems between Sharifa Owens and her friend Jean Allen, who refuses to believe you can be Christian and also celebrate Kwanzaa. When the Owens daughter invites the Allen daughter over for dinner, Jean decides she needs to check out the scene. The tussle between Jean and Sharifa lies at the dramatic center of the piece. The new version adds a first act set in Jean’s home the day before, as she prepares her Christmas celebration, gossips with her daughter and gives us a peek into her world view. Mils James directs an enthusiastic cast led by Lamar Darnell Fields as Mr. Owens, with Melessie Clark giving a strong and impeccably honest performance as Sharifa.

sexually and politically; an old flame turns up demanding sexual and political favors; {BY TED HOOVER} and the most famous actress of the Restoration stage, Nell Gwynne, pops in needing THOUGH IT’S got absolutely nothing to do sexual and romantic engagement. with the holiday season, my Christmas Though the Pittsburgh-premiere propresent arrived a bit early with Off the Wall duction, as directed by John Shepard, Production’s staging of Liz Duffy Adams’ couldn’t be more lucid or compelling, I 2010 comedy Or,, one of the most charming have to admit I found the earlier parts a plays I’ve had the pleasure of seeing in quite little too twee; outside of academic circles, some time. there are probably three people who know This intermissionless, 90-minute play who Behn was and, at the beginning, Or, is a fantasia on the life and the passion of is fairly insider-y and fairly proud of its Aphra Behn, perhaps the first woman ever own preciousness. to earn her living as a playwright. But as the show goes on, Adams leaves behind the specifics of her tale and the play becomes a deeply engrossing story of a OR, woman (any woman) struggling to find her continues through Jan. 10. voice in the world and her purpose in her Off the Wall Theater, 25 W. Main Street. Carnegie. $5-35. 888-718-4253 or universe — the greatest obstacle to which is www.insideoffthewall.com her own self-doubt. Erika Cuenca gives an impressive and Details of her life are mostly lost. We do moving turn as she works through Behn’s know she was a dramatist and a spy work- journey. Robin Abramson is having the ing for King Charles II. Everything else has time of her life as several characters; she’s been the subject of scholarly debate. especially captivating as Gwynne. Ethan Adams takes the fact that the facts are Hova’s performance as both the prince and sketchy and creates a farce in which Behn the knave is detailed and deeply felt. is trying to finish her latest play while inWhile being a “theater person” might trigues are happening all around her. King help you get some of Or,’s more esoteric Charles, her patron and would-be lover, jokes, this Off the Wall production proves to stops by wanting Behn to put across, both be for everyone.

The spirit hovering over Ubuntu turns out not to be African ancestors, Jesus or Santa, but rather the late Pittsburgh playwright Rob Penny, who was famous for creating plays about African Americans exploring their cultural heritage. Penny’s desire to educate his audience was always far more important than his desire to entertain. He had a message he wanted to share, and theater was the vehicle. I do know that El considers Penny a mentor, and that shows in this play. Ubuntu is an educational experience rather than a truly theatrical one, and while much of the information is necessary and interesting, it’s also true that the play can feel a bit preachy and stilted. El wisely leavens the sometimes thudding sincerity with flashes of welcome humor and attitude and, as a bonus, there’s a rousing musical finale sending you off to whatever holiday tradition you celebrate. And a happy New Year to all.

I NF O @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

INF O @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

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UBUNTU HOLIDAY continues through Dec. 30. 937 Liberty Ave., Downtown. $15-20. 412-687-4686 or www.pghplaywrights.com

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Jacob Bacharach published The Bend of the World. {PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

AT LAST YEAR’S Theatre Festival in Black Pittsburgh’s year was marked by notable debuts in fiction by local authors. Among them: Jacob Bacharach’s The Bend of the World (Liverigth) is a madcap, wickedly funny but still poignant coming-of-age novel about a 30-year-old Pittsburgh office drone, his messed-up buddies, various conspiracy theories, and UFOs over Mount Washington. Strong reviews included one in The New Yorker, and there were complimentary quotes from such literary lights as Sam Lipsyte and Gary Shteyngart. Junkette is Sarah Shotland’s alternately lyrical and matter-of-fact novel about a young collegegraduate heroin addict in pre-Katrina New Orleans. Searching, funny, sometimes devastating, it upends preconceptions about addicts without romanticizing them. Published by indie White Gorilla Press, Junkette didn’t get much media attention, but Shotland (who runs the Words Without Walls program for prisoners, and teaches at Chatham University) is a potent new voice. In Tomorrow and Tomorrow (Putnam), Thomas Sweterlitsch offers a remarkably assured depiction of a devastated protagonist unraveling a murder mystery in a slightly future society where the world’s been uploaded, virtual reality is barely virtual … and, oh, Pittsburgh has been flattened by a bomb. The book debuted to good notices, a Playboy Book of the Month pick and even a movie deal. Jeffrey Condran’s novel Prague Summer (Counterpoint) was a solid followup to his debut short-story collection, 2013’s A Fingerprint Repeated. The story, a mystery and a hymn to bibliophilia, is set in the entrancing but forbidding Czech capital. Kirkus called the novel “an expressive, tantalizing and ingeniously constructed study of human character.” Condran is also in indie publishing, as a co-founder of Braddock Avenue Books. And the stories in Your Life Idyllic (Black Lawrence Press), Craig Bernier’s debut collection, are mostly straightforward narratives about ordinary people doing everyday things, mostly in and around Detroit. But Bernier regularly surprises and moves with his portraits of factory workers, lovers and drunks. Also noteworthy in Pittsburgh letters: Terrance Hayes, already a National Book Award-winner for his poetry, won a coveted MacArthur “genius” grant, in September. And City of Asylum/Pittsburgh marked a decade of sheltering writers persecuted in their home countries with projects including its arm Sampsonia Way’s publication of an English translation of resident Venezuelan writer Israel Centeno’s The Conspiracy; coverage in the national press; and a big anniversary reading, in October, called Exiled Voices. DRISCOLL@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

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FOR THE WEEK OF

12.25.1401.01.15

SPOTLIGHT of the WEEK

FOR INFORMATION ON HOW TO SUBMIT LISTINGS AND PRESS RELEASES, CALL 412.316.3342 X161.

DEC. 27

Kirikou and the Sorceress

Drive, Robinson. $15-25. 412-693-5555 or www. latitude360.com/pittsburgh-pa

{SPORT}

NTehewLasYt Seocaiarl’AsffaEirvofeth2e Y0ea1r5 Pot Roast Bruschetta B Brusch hetta t | Duck Lollipops Roasted Chard and Spinach Rillette Fresh Oysters | Boar Bacon | Ahi Ceviche

$60 PER PERSON

SECTION RESERVATION

10 tickets / 2 Bottles of Dom Perignon / $1500 Ticketed event only | Not open to the public 8pm to 2am.

TICKETS AVAILABLE AT PERLEPGH.COM 25 Market Square • Downtown Pittsburgh • 412-471-2058

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

The Harlem Globetrotters make their annual Boxing Day visit to Pittsburgh. (Who’s taking the Washington Generals plus points?) Today actually marks the start of the Globetrotters’ 2015 season, during which the famous troupe’s split squads will play more than 300 matches in North America alone. But the gymnastic feats of comedy and basketball get started with two shows today at Consol Energy Center. Bill O’Driscoll 1 and 6 p.m., Uptown. $20-195. www.ticketmaster.com

{SCREEN} {MUSIC} DJ Buscrates has been busy since leaving town for Atlanta earlier this year: a solo EP, collaborations as Extra Medium and East Liberty Quarters. But he’s got time for a Yuletide visit to his old stomping grounds. Tonight, DJ Buscrates The 16-bit Ensemble performs at Brillobox, joining J. Malls to spin five hours of the 1980s funk and soul (a.k.a. boogie) that’s influenced him lately. It’s Buscrates’ first local show since April. BO 9 p.m.-2 a.m.

{COMEDY} Comedian Chuck Krieger has been a favorite on stages across the region since the 1990s. Whether he’s talking about bringing food into the bedroom — “There’s nothing sexy about pancakes. So there I am slapping my wife’s ass with a flapjack” — or cutting up on WDVE, Krieger has honed his sarcastic, regular-guy humor to an edge. This weekend he headlines four shows at Latitude 40, in Robinson Township, with Sean Collier. Charlie Deitch 7 and 10 p.m. Also 7 and 10 p.m. Sat., Dec. 27. 200 Quinn

4104 Penn Ave., Bloomfield. $5 (21+). 412-621-4900

DEC. 29

Cirque Dreams Holidaze

When it was released in 1982, Ridley Scott’s stylish sci-fi thriller Blade Runner, adapted from a Philip K. Dick story, astutely foretold a dark future, marked by broken cities, man-machine hybrids, corporate dominance and neon-lit nights. But wait: This dystopia is set in 2019 — four years from now! Get a jump on the immediate future when the Hollywood Theater screens this influential classic, starring Harrison Ford and Rutger Hauer. The first of four {PHOTO COURTESY OF CIRQUE PUBLICATIONS}

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sp otlight {PHOTO COURTESY OF JOAN MARCUS}

Starting in the 1960s, Motown really was, as it claimed, “The Sound of Young America.” More subtly, the iconically black-owned hit factory founded by Berry Gordy, with its African-American producers, songwriters and musicians, helped bridge racial divides during the Civil Rights era and beyond. According to Jesse Nager, it’s doing so still. Broadway hit Motown The Musical’s inaugural tour was playing St. Louis, in November, when a grand jury announced it wouldn’t indict the police officer who killed Michael Brown in nearby Ferguson. “I’ve never done a show to an audience that needed it so much,” says Nager, who plays Smokey Robinson, by phone from the road. “They needed the joy, they needed to be reminded that even though there is struggle, it’s going to be all right.” Motown tells Gordy’s story from Motown’s founding through its famous 25th-anniversary TV special, with dramatic scenes but mostly with 60-some songs, from “My Guy” to “My Girl,” “Dancing in the Street” to “I Heard It Through the Grapevine.” The leads are Gordy (played by Julius Thomas III) and Diana Ross (Allison Semmes); others include Marvin Gaye, Stevie Wonder, Michael Jackson and more. PNC Broadway Across America hosts eight performances starting Dec. 30. As Nager says, “These songs are ingrained in the fabric of American history.” Bill O’Driscoll Tue., Dec. 30-Sun., Jan. 4. 600 Penn Ave., Downtown. $30-90. 412-456-6666 or www.trustarts.org

screenings is tonight. Al Hoff 10 p.m. Also 9:30 p.m. Sat., Dec. 27; 7 p.m. Sun., Dec. 28; and 7 p.m. Wed., Dec. 31. Hollywood Theater, 1449 Potomac Ave., Dormont. $8. 412-563-0368 or www. thehollywooddormont.org

+ SAT., DEC. 27 {WORDS} Geoff Camphire offers yet another twist on the undead with his new novel, Charlie Dead and the So-Called Zombie Apocalypse. Living in a world already rife with zombies, the book’s high school protagonist has just been bitten by one, and has mere days to figure out how to avoid his fate. The book is part one of a trilogy. Camphire, a Pittsburgh native now living in Washington, D.C., returns to sign copies at — where else? — House of the Dead, Lawrenceville’s zombie-themed boutique. BO Noon-2 p.m. 4110 Butler St., Lawrenceville. Free. www.houseofthedead.com

{SCREEN} This week’s top free, family-friendly screening of a film you never heard of comes courtesy of Sembène — The Film & Arts Festival. With gorgeous hand-painted visuals, French filmmaker Michel Ocelot’s animated 1998 feature Kirikou and the Sorceress tells the compelling story of a precocious newborn boy who sets out to confront the sorceress who afflicts his village. The award-winning film (the DVD is available from

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www.AfricanDiasporaDVD. com) is based on a classic West African children’s tale. The Sembène festival, which shows films of the African diaspora, also screens “Sneaker Madness,” an episode of the Wayans brothers’ NickToons Thugaboo cartoon series. After these Carnegie Library of Homewood screenings, all attendees receive a Kwanzaa treat. BO 1:30 p.m. 7101 Hamilton Ave., Homewood. Free. www. sembenefilmfestival.org

Cirque Productions includes 30 performers from around the world in 20 acts and, promises the press release, “over 300 costumes.” Shows tonight and tomorrow at the Benedum Center are courtesy of the Cohen & Grigsby Trust Presents series. BO 7:30 p.m. Also 2 p.m. Tue., Dec. 30. 719 Liberty Ave., Downtown. $39.75-59.75. 412-456-6666 or www.trustarts.org

+ TUE., DEC. 30 {MUSIC}

DEC. 26

Harlem Globetrotters

+ MON., DEC. 29 {STAGE} If you’d prefer your holidays to incorporate a literal circus, Cirque Dreams Holidaze is probably the ticket. In this Broadway-style show, gingerbread men flip in the air and toy soldiers march the tightwire, with additional acrobatics by snowmen, icemen and … wait for it … penguins. (Probably not actual penguins.) Plus singing, dancing and giant candy canes. The touring extravaganza from

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Jevon Rushton & Friends close out 2014 at Jazz Live. Rushton, a top young Pittsburgh-based jazz drummer, is a protégé of the great Roger Humphries who has played with names like Kirk Franklin, Dwayne Dolphin and Sean Jones. He’s a mainstay of the local scene, and tonight he helps this BNY Mellon Jazz series ring out the year with a free evening show at Backstage Bar. BO 5 p.m. 655 Penn Ave., Downtown. Free. 412-4566666 or www.trustarts.org

{WORD} Another of Pittsburgh’s suddenly numerous storytelling nights continues, this one with its year-end All-Star Night. The monthly Story Night series, at Riley’s Pour House, in Carnegie, is run by educator and fiction author Lawrence C. Connolly. Tonight, the top storytellers from each month of 2014 returns to tell a new yarn and compete for the title of Year’s Best Storyteller, complete with trophy. BO 8 p.m. 215 E. Main St., Carnegie. Free. 412-279-0770

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What’s new at Highmark First Night Pittsburgh? Besides the year, obviously? The Pittsburgh Cultural Trust’s alcohol-free New Year’s Eve festival annually draws some 40,000 visitors, with about 150 performances, exhibits, activities and more at 50 Cultural District venues. While 90 percent of First Night events are indoors, it’s those outdoor attractions — from live bands and ice-sculpting to line-dancing and the big community parade down Penn Avenue — that give the evening its character. Outdoors, you’ll see the First Night debut of Beauty Slap, the new band whose danceable electronic beats with live horns and guitar are winning fans all over town (Dollar Bank Stage). And for the first time, the Highmark Stage headliner — leading to the midnight countdown and Zambelli fireworks finale — goes country-flavored, with those favorites from The Voice, The Swon Brothers. Elsewhere, Cello Fury and Texture Contemporary Ballet premiere a new collaborative dance-and-music work. Lee Terbosic Magic joins Japanese sword-dancers, Indian dancers, belly-dancers and First Night Salsa (with Machete Kisumantao) during a packed evening on the CAPA High School stage. And art-robot guy Toby Atticus Fraley offers his latest Lost Sound Search Engine, which promises to scour the air for seemingly vanished sounds from the past. There’s also comedy, from standup to improv; live theater; visual-art exhibits in multiple galleries; hands-on art activities for kids (and adults); and more. All First Night events are free with your button, which still costs $8 in advance (and is free for kids under 5). However, some events require seating vouchers (obtainable in advance by phone or at the Theater Square box office). The Trust also offers VIP tickets ($75), which include priority seating, parking and more. Bill O’Driscoll 6 p.m.-midnight. Downtown. $8-10 (children under 5 are free). 412-456-6666 or www.trustarts.org

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{ALL LISTINGS MUST BE SUBMITTED BY 9 A.M. FRIDAY PRIOR TO PUBLICATION}

TO SUBMIT A LISTING: HTTP://PGHCITYPAPER.COM/HAPPENINGS 412.316.3388 (FAX) + 412.316.3342 X161 (PHONE)

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2015 New Year Ne Years E Eve Dinner Package $75 per person - includes 5 courses

Lounge Bar Package

$100 per person - All-Inclusive includes full bar menu w assorted bourbons, scotches, wine, craft drafts and craft cocktails. Sponsored by Tito’s Vodka.

Call 412-965-5684 for details. 1908 Carson Street l Southside l 412-918-1215 LIKE US ON FACEBOOK

THEATER CHRISTMAS STAR. Ray Werner’s play about a Christmas Eve gathering between an Iraq War veteran, his Vietnam-vet father & his mother. Sat, 2 p.m. Thru Dec. 27. Pittsburgh Playwrights Theatre, Downtown. MIDNIGHT RADIO: IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE. Thu-Sat, 8 p.m. Thru Dec. 27. Bricolage, Downtown. 412-471-0999. MURDER FOR TWO. 1 actor investigates the crime, the other plays all of the suspects & they both play the piano. Wed-Sat, 7:30 p.m. and Sat, 2 p.m. Thru Jan. 18. Cabaret at Theater Square, Downtown. 412-325-6769. NEW YEAR’S EVE MURDER MYSTERY SPECTACULAR. Murder Mystery dinner performance of “It’s My Party and I’ll Die if I want to”, improv show, champagne toast & dancing. Wed., Dec. 31, 8 p.m. Crowne Plaza Hotel, Bethel Park. 724-344-2069. OR. One night in the life of Aphra Behn, poet, spy, first professional female playwright, in a plot full

of love, intrigue, murder & career making decisions.Presented by off the Wall Productions. Fri, Sat, 8 p.m., Sun, 3 p.m., Fri, Sat, 8 p.m. and Sun., Jan. 4, 3 p.m. Thru Jan. 10. Off the Wall Theater, Carnegie. 1-888-71-TICKETS. THE GIFT OF THE ICE QUEEN. Original Gemini Theater musical Sat, Sun, 1 & 3:30 p.m. Thru Dec. 28. Gemini Theater, Point Breeze. 412-243-5201. UBUNTU HOLIDAY. Kim El’s play set at a Kwanzaa celebration interrupted by a distrustful Christian guest. Fri, Sat, 8 p.m., Thru Dec. 28, 2 p.m. and Thru Dec. 30, 7 p.m. Thru Dec. 27. Pittsburgh Playwrights Theatre, Downtown.

COMEDY FRI 26 “BEST OF THE BURGH” COMEDY SHOWCASE. Come out and see Pittsburgh’s best comedians every Friday. Fri, 8 p.m. Thru Feb. 6 Corner Cafe, South Side. 412-488-2995.

Sample Straub Sat., 12/27 5-7PM Beer on Butler 4811 Butler Street, Lawrenceville

SUN 28 MUSICAL IMPROV SUNDAYS. Sun, 8 p.m. Thru Feb. 22 The Maker Theater, Shadyside. 412-404-2695.

MON 29

COMEDY SAUCE. Hosted by Aaron Kleiber. Mon, 9:30 p.m. Thru Feb. 23 Pleasure Bar, Bloomfield. 412-682-9603. TFM IMPROV COMEDY. Full CHUCK KRIEGER. 7 & 10 p.m. and throttle improv every Monday Sat., Dec. 27, 7 & 10 p.m. Latitude night starring our resident house 360, North Fayette. 412-693-5555. teams. Mon, 8 p.m. Thru Feb. 23 The Maker Theater, Shadyside. 412-404-2695. BILL CRAWFORD. 8 & UNPLANNED COMEDY’S 10:30 p.m., Sat., Dec. 27, JAMBONE. Mon, 7 & 9:30 p.m. and Sun., 9:30 p.m. Thru Dec. 28, 7 p.m. The w. w w Jan. 26 Hambone’s, Improv, Waterfront. per ghcitypa p Lawrenceville. 412-462-5233. .com 412-681-4318.

FRI 26 - SAT 27

FRI 26 - SUN 28

FULL LIST ONLINE

SAT 27

PARRIS KNIGHT, SHANNON NORMAN, & MIKE SASSON. Comedy show hosted by Amy Capiross, benefiting those in need of warm winter clothing. 9 p.m. Mogie’s Irish Pub. 724-339-6904.

PUBLICNOTICES P U BL I C NOT ICE S @P GH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

{BY ERIC LIDJI}

MAGICIAN-COMEDIAN EXTREME MICHAEL GIGLIOTTI. Amazing strolling magic & comedy. Fun for the whole family feat. Caesars Palace award winning Master Magician MICHAELANGELO. Fri, 5-7 p.m. Mullen’s Bar & Grill, North Side. 412-231-1112.

TUE 30 TUESDAY NIGHT STAND-UP. Tue, 9 p.m. Hot Rod Cafe, Mt. Washington. 412-592-7869.

WED 31 BEERHIVE COMEDY. Open Mic. Hosted by Aaron Kleiber. Wed, 8 p.m. Thru March 25 The BeerHive, Strip District. 412-904-4502. COMEDY OPEN MIC. Hosted by Ronald Renwick. Wed, 9:30 p.m. Scarpaci’s Place, Mt. Washington. 412-431-9908. STAND-UP COMEDY OPEN MIC. Wed, 8 p.m. The BeerHive, Strip District. 412-904-4502.

EXHIBITS ALLEGHENY-KISKI VALLEY HERITAGE MUSEUM. Military artifacts and exhibits on the Allegheny Valley’s industrial heritage. Tarentum. 724-224-7666. ANDY WARHOL MUSEUM. Exposures. A window display & artist product series feat. Daniel Pillis. North Side. 412-237-8300. AUGUST WILSON CENTER FOR AFRICAN AMERICAN CULTURE. Pittsburgh: Reclaim, Renew, Remix. Feat. imagery, film & oral history narratives to explore communities, cultures, & innovations. Downtown. 412-258-2700. BAYERNHOF MUSEUM. Large collection of automatic roll-played musical instruments and music boxes in a mansion setting. Call for appointment. O’Hara. 412-782-4231. BOST BUILDING. Collectors. Preserved materials reflecting the industrial heritage of Southwestern PA. Homestead. 412-464-4020. CARNEGIE MUSEUM OF ART. Carnegie Trees 2014: Winter CONTINUES ON PG. 44

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014


Pittsburgh’s

Live Music Scene!

Tickets at www.jergels.com

VISUALART

MONDAY, DECEMBER 29

Work by Crystal Armagost, from her solo show at Crazy Mocha, in Bloomfield

ONGOING 707 PENN GALLERY. Becky Slemmons: Gatherings. Exploring what happens when an artist enters the religious realm, pursuing a performative project, in an environment where conformity often dominates. Downtown. 412-456-2962. 709 PENN GALLERY. Recent Works by Sheila Cueller-Shaffer. Each abstract work represents a part of a narrative of an immigrant’s journey where anything can become the subject: a memory, a photo, or a change in landscape through time. Downtown. 412-471-6070. 937 LIBERTY AVE. The Landscape Architecture Legacy of Dan Kiley. Commissioned photographs of significant landscapes across the nation & abroad. Downtown. 412-471-6070. AMERICAN JEWISH MUSEUM. Emily Newman & the New Chelyuskinites. Modeled on the 1933-34 Russian sea expedition that trapped 111 people on arctic ice for two months after their Chelyuskin sank w/ equal parts social documentary, tableaux & oral history. Squirrel Hill. 412-697-3231. ANDY WARHOL MUSEUM. 13 Most Wanted Men: Andy Warhol & the 1964 World’s Fair. Warhol’s enlarged mug shots from an NYPD booklet featuring the 13 most wanted criminals of 1962. Chuck Connelly: My America. Part of the Pittsburgh

2014 Biennial. Permanent collection. Artwork and artifacts by the famed Pop Artist. North Side. 412-237-8300. ARTDFACT. Artdfact Gallery. The works of Timothy Kelley & other regional & US artists on display. Sculpture, oil & acrylic paintings, mixed media, found objects, more. North Side. 724-797-3302. ARTISTS IMAGE RESOURCE. Printwork 2014: AIR’s 3rd Annual National Juried Exhibition. North Side. 412-321-8664. BACKSTAGE BAR AT THEATRE SQUARE. Post-Impressionism to Abstract. Artwork by Vickie Schilling & Nadya Lapets. Downtown. 412-325-6768. BAR MARCO. Studio Direct. New Work by Seth Clark. Strip District. 412-471-1900. BE GALLERIES. Ron Copeland: Illuminations. Lawrenceville. 412-687-2606. BOULEVARD GALLERY. Boulevard Gallery’s Annual Holiday Event. Pottery, jewelry, sculptures, cards, photography, watercolor, oils, & acrylics. Verona. 412-828-1031. CARNEGIE MUSEUM OF ART. Maggie’s Centres: A Blueprint for Cancer Care. Installation showcasing models, photographs, drawings, & videos relating to the design of five cancer centers in the United Kingdom. Sebastian Errazuriz: Look Again Storyteller: The Photographs of Duane Michals. The definitive retrospective & largest-ever presentation of

this innovative artist’s work. Oakland. 412-622-3131. CHATHAM UNIVERSITY. Culture in Context. African Art from the Olkes Collection. Shadyside. 412-365-1232. CHRISTINE FRECHARD GALLERY. Pasquale Pristera & Zivi Aviraz. Feat. artworks by the “wood zipper artist”, Pasquale Pristera & Zivi Aviraz. Squirrel Hill. 412-421- 8888. COHEN & GRIGSBY GALLERY. Snap Judgments: Capturing the Architecture of the Allegheny County Courthouse. Work by David Aschkenas. By appointment. Downtown. 412-297-4900. CRAZY MOCHA COFFEE COMPANY. Artwork by Crystala Armagost. Bloomfield. 412-681-5225. ECLECTIC ART & OBJECTS GALLERY. 19th century American & European paintings combined with some of the world’s most talented contemporary artists & their artwork. The Hidden Collection. Watercolors by Robert N. Blair (1912- 2003). Hiromi Traditional Japanese Oil Paintings The Lost Artists of the 1893 Chicago Exhibition. Collectors Showcase. Emsworth. 412-734-2099. FILMMAKERS GALLERIES. Spectator. Work by photographer April Friges. Oakland. 412-681-5449. FRICK ART & HISTORICAL CENTER. Charles Courtney Curran: Seeking the Ideal. Work CONTINUES ON PG. 44

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New Years EVE Party PM 30AM -1: 9 OM FR R BA EN OP Party favors, DJ Hoover, Champagne toast at midnight Wine, mixed shots, FInger foods and energy cocktails.

Sponsored By

$65 .00 Per Person - $110 .00 Per COUPLE Call to reserve a spot. Limited number of tickets JEKYL AND HYDE | 140 S. 18TH STREET 412-488-0777 | BARSMART.COM/JEKYLANDHYDE +

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LIKE KE US ON FACEBOOK!

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BIG LIST, CONTINUED FROM PG. 42

Wonders. The Hall of Architecture w/ several towering 20-foot Colorado spruce trees, each adorned w/ handcrafted ornaments. Oakland. 412-622-3131. CARNEGIE SCIENCE CENTER. Ongoing: Buhl Digital Dome (planetarium), Miniature Railroad and Village, USS Requin submarine, and more. North Side. 412-237-3400. CARRIE FURNACE. Built in 1907, Carrie Furnaces 6 & 7 are extremely rare examples of pre World War II iron-making technology. Rankin. 412-464-4020 x.21. CHILDREN’S MUSEUM OF PITTSBURGH. Tough Art. An annual exhibition of original, interactive artworks “tough” enough to withstand kid handling. Take a walk through a prism forest, create cracks on kinetic stained glass, reach for a sky of 600 LEDs, & explore the inner workings of an intergalactic sheep. North Side. 412-322-5058. COMPASS INN. Demos & tours with costumed guides featuring this restored stagecoach stop. 724-238-4983. CONNEY M. KIMBO GALLERY. University of Pittsburgh Jazz Exhibit: Memorabilia & Awards from the International Hall of Fame. Oakland. 412-648-7446. DEPRECIATION LANDS MUSEUM. Small living history museum celebrating the settlement & history of the Depreciation Lands. Allison Park. 412-486-0563. FALLINGWATER. Tour the famed Frank Lloyd Wright house. 724-329-8501. FIRST PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH. Tours of 13 Tiffany stained-glass windows. Downtown. 412-471-3436. FORT PITT MUSEUM. Reconstructed fort houses museum of Pittsburgh history circa French & Indian War and American Revolution. Downtown. 412-281-9285. FRICK ART & HISTORICAL CENTER. Ongoing: tours of Clayton, the Frick estate, with classes & programs for all ages. Point Breeze. 412-371-0600. HARTWOOD ACRES. Tour this Tudor mansion & stable complex. Enjoy hikes & outdoor activities in the surrounding park. Allison Park. 412-767-9200. KENTUCK KNOB. Tour the other Frank Lloyd Wright house. 724-329-8501. KERR MEMORIAL MUSEUM. Tours of a restored 19th-century, middle-class home. Oakmont. 412-826-9295. MARIDON MUSEUM. Collection includes jade & ivory statues from China and Japan, as well as Meissen porcelain. Butler. 724-282-0123. MCGINLEY HOUSE & MCCULLY LOG HOUSE. Historic homes open for tours, lectures and more. Monroeville. 412-373-7794. NATIONAL AVIARY. Home to more than 600 birds from over 200 species. With classes, lectures,

VISUAL ART

CONTINUED FROM PG. 43 demos and more. North Side. 412-323-7235. NATIONALITY ROOMS. 26 by French-trained American in the city: Vanessa German, rooms helping to tell the story artist, known for his sparkling photographed by Lynn Johnson; of Pittsburgh’s immigrant past. canvases of women in gardens Bill Strickland, photographed University of Pittsburgh. Oakland. & other outdoor settings. by Scott Goldsmith; and Randy 412-624-6000. Permanent collection of Gilson, photographed by Brian OLD ST. LUKE’S. Pioneer church European Art. Point Breeze. Cohen. North Side. 412-322-1773. features 1823 pipe organ, 412-371-0600. MASER GALLERIES. Burton Revolutionary War graves. Scott. THE GALLERY 4. Trip In / On Morris: One Man Show. 412-851-9212. Neon. Work by Pittsburgh based Paintings, serigraphs, pop-outs, OLIVER MILLER HOMESTEAD. painter & illustrator Gabe Felice. posters. Shadyside. 412-687-0885. This pioneer/Whiskey Rebellion Shadyside. 412-363-5050. MATTRESS FACTORY. Artists in site features log house, blacksmith GALLERY ON 43RD STREET. Residence. Installations created shop & gardens. South Park. New Work by Jonelle in-residence by Danny Bracken, 412-835-1554. Summerfield. Lawrenceville. John Peña, Ryder Henry, PENNSYLVANIA TROLLEY 412-683-6488. Kathleen Montgomery, & MUSEUM. Trolley rides and GALLERY-VERY FINE ART. Benjamin Sota. Part of the 2014 exhibits. Includes displays, walking Group Show. Work by Linda Pittsburgh Biennial. Ongoing tours, gift shop, picnic area and Price-Sneddon, Peggy Habets, Installations. Works by Turrell, Trolley Theatre. Washington. James E. Trusko & others. Lutz, Kusama, Anastasi, 724-228-9256. South Side. 412-901-8805. Highstein, Wexler & Woodrow. PHIPPS CONSERVATORY & GLENN GREENE STAINED North Side. 412-231-3169. BOTANICAL GARDEN. Winter GLASS STUDIO INC. Original MENDELSON GALLERY. David Flower Show & Light Garden. Glass Art by Glenn Greene. Lewis, Terry Shutko & Friends. Feat. a variety of festive Exhibition of new work, recent Shadyside. 412-361-8664. poinsettias, showy amaryllis & work & older work. Regent MICHAEL HERTRICH ART & aromatic paperwhites, Winter Square. 412-243-2772. FRAME. Holiday Celebration. Flower Show showcases LA PRIMA ESPRESSO. A group exhibition feat. new illuminated glass art & evergreens Paintings/Prints of Italy. Prints of works by the gallery’s stable of glowing with thousands of LED Vince Ornato’s oil paintings of artists. South Side. 412-431-3337. lights. 14 indoor rooms & 3 Italy. Strip District. 412-281-1922. MILLER GALLERY AT outdoor gardens feature exotic LAKEVUE ATHLETIC CLUB. CARNEGIE MELLON plants and floral displays from Pop-Up Gallery. Work by a UNIVERSITY. Armin Hoffman: around the world. Oakland. variety of artists. 724-316-9326. Farbe/Color. Celebrating our 412-622-6914. MANCHESTER CRAFTSMEN’S Armin Hofmann exhibition of PINBALL PERFECTION. Pinball GUILD. Being Good. silkscreens &emerging talent museum & players club. West View. Documenting three from CMU School of Design 2014 412-931-4425. Pittsburghers who are using Seniors. Oakland. 412-268-3618. PITTSBURGH ZOO & PPG their art & committing their MORGAN CONTEMPORARY AQUARIUM. Home to 4,000 resources, to improving GLASS GALLERY. animals, including many distressed neighborhoods texture&tension. Work by Alex endangered species. Highland Park. 412-665-3639. RACHEL CARSON HOMESTEAD. the Civil War through artifacts comedy, visual art, fireworks, ball A Reverence for Life. Photos drop & hands-on activities in an & personal mementos. Oakland. and artifacts of her life & work. alcohol-free atmosphere, held all 412-621-4253. Springdale. 724-274-5459. over downtown Pittsburgh. Tickets ST. ANTHONY’S CHAPEL. RIVERS OF STEEL NATIONAL required. 6 p.m. 412-456-6666. Features 5,000 relics of Catholic HERITAGE AREA. Exhibits NEW YEAR’S EVE: AS saints. North Side. 412-323-9504. on the Homestead Mill. Steel TIME GOES BY. Cocktails, ST. NICHOLAS CROATIAN industry and community artifacts dinner, dancing & operatic CATHOLIC CHURCH. Maxo Vanka from 1881-1986. Homestead. entertainment drawn from the Murals. Mid-20th century murals 412-464-4020. depicting war, social justice and the Viennese and American musical SENATOR JOHN HEINZ theater traditions. Hosted by immigrant experience in America. HISTORY CENTER. Pittsburgh’s Pittsburgh Opera. RSVP. 7:30 p.m. Millvale. 421-681-0905. Lost Steamboat: Treasures of Carnegie Music Hall, Oakland. THE TOONSEUM. the Arabia. Exhibit feat. 412-281-0912 ext. 225. Comic-tanium: The nearly 2,000 once-hidden NEW YEAR’S EVE BALL Super Materials of the treasures exploring DROP. Early ball drop & mini Superheroes. See how Pittsburgh’s important golf. 7 & 8 p.m. Monster Mini Batman, Iron Man, role as a Gateway to www. per Golf of Monroeville, Monroeville. Captain America, & the West & a national pa pghcitym 412-372-Golf. other comic characters hub for the steamboat .co SILVESTER NEW YEAR’S EVE use real-world minerals, building industry in the metals, & materials science & CELEBRATION. 5-K & 1-Mile races, mid-19th century. From museum tours, pork & sauerkraut engineering to boost their powers Slavery to Freedom. Highlight’s dinner, comedic short film “Dinner & save their worlds. Downtown. Pittsburgh’s role in the anti-slavery for One” that’s part of Germany’s 412-232-0199. movement. Ongoing: Western PA New Year’s Eve traditions, more. WEST OVERTON MUSEUMS. Sports Museum, Clash of Empires, 2-6:30 p.m. Harmony Museum, Learn about distilling and and exhibits on local history, more. Harmony. 888-821-4822. coke-making in this pre-Civil War Strip District. 412-454-6000. industrial village. 724-887-7910. SEWICKLEY HEIGHTS HISTORY CENTER. Museum commemorates Pittsburgh industrialists, local history. Sewickley. 412-741-4487. THE NUTCRACKER. Presented SOLDIERS & SAILORS by Pittsburgh Ballet Theatre. MYSTICAL PSYCHIC NEW MEMORIAL HALL. War in the The classic story of Clara & her YEARS FAIR. 12-5 p.m. Library Fire Pacific 1941-1945. Feat. a collection Nutcracker Prince w/ scenes from Hall, South Park. 724-348-8063. of military artifacts showcasing Pittsburgh. Opens Dec. 5. Thu, Fri, photographs, uniforms, shells 7 p.m., Sat, 2 & 7 p.m. and Sun, 12 & other related items. Military & 4:30 p.m. Thru Dec. 28 Benedum museum dedicated to honoring FIRST NIGHT PITTSBURGH 2015. military service members since Center, Downtown. 412-454-9109. An evening of music, dance,

FULL LIST ONLINE

HOLIDAY SUN 28

WED 31

Bernstein, Marsha Blaker, Byul Go, Romina Gonzales & Edison Zapata, Weston Lambert, more. Shadyside. 412-441-5200. PANZA GALLERY. Dave Klug & Friends. The work of Dave Klug, George Schill, Stacy Innerst & Wayno. Millvale. 412-821-0959. PHOTO ANTIQUITIES. Photos in Jewelry. An exhibit showcasing exquisite samples of photographic jewelry, popularized in the 1800s. North Side. 412-231-7881. PITTSBURGH CENTER FOR THE ARTS. 3 Guild Shows. 3 different shows presented at PCA: Women of Vision presents “Storytellers: Truth be Told”, Craftsmen Guild presents “Illusions” & Fiberarts Guild presents “Construct”. Shadyside. 412-361-0873. PITTSBURGH GLASS CENTER. Emerge/Evolve. Ft. selected works from Emerge 2014, Bullseye Glass Company’s eighth biennial kiln-glass exhibition for emerging artists, & work by three past Emerge finalists. Friendship. 412-365-2145. REVISION SPACE. Terry Boyd “Pins & Needles” Solo Exhibition. Drawing & embroidery techniques, incorporating drama, abstraction & performance into multi-faceted & intense pieces. Open weekends & weekdays by appt. Lawrenceville. 412-735-3201. SHAW GALLERIES. Sincronia.

FRI 26 PIN UP PERFECTION BURLESQUE. 9 p.m. Hambone’s, Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318.

SAT 27 - SUN 28

Work by 6 contemporary artists from Venezuela. Downtown. 412-281-4884. SILVER EYE CENTER FOR PHOTOGRAPHY. Close to Home. 7 artists use photography to explore different notions about home as a physical place w/ deep emotional connections. South Side. 412-431-1810. THE SOCIETY FOR CONTEMPORARY CRAFT. CRAFTED: A Celebration of the Handmade. Artisan-crafted mugs, cups and tumblers by 50 artists from across America. Strip District. 412-261-7003. SPACE. Obsessions. Showcasing six artists from across the U.S., exploring the nature of obsession through painting, sculpture, site-specific installation, video & performance. Ft. artists: Jeremiah Johnson, Jason Lockyer, Nathan Margoni, Mary Ivy Martin, Becky Slemmons & Laurie Trok. Downtown. 412-325-7723. UNIVERSITY OF PITTSBURGH ART GALLERY. Restrike: Uncovering the Life and Work of Gertrude Quastler. Feat. the artistic styles of Gertrude Quastler from printmaking to sculpture. Oakland. 412-648-2423. WOOD STREET GALLERIES. Second/Second. Light & sound installations by Icelandic artist Finnbogi Pétursson. Downtown. 412-471-5605.

Squirrel Hill. 412-422-9650. PITTSBURGH CONTINENTAL PHILOSOPHY READING GROUP. Tue, 6 p.m. East End Book Exchange, Bloomfield. 412-224-2847.

UPROAR. A revealing glimpse into the “creative process” of our heroine, who experiences all the typical ups & downs, rejected ideas, & writers’ block. Presented by fireWALL dance theatre. Sun, 7 p.m., Sat, 7 p.m., Sun, 7 p.m., Wed., Dec. 31, 7 p.m., Sat., Jan. 3, 4 p.m. and Sat., Jan. 10, 3 p.m. Thru Dec. 28 Off the Wall Theater, Carnegie. 1-888-71-TICKETS.

KIDSTUFF

FUNDRAISERS

FRI 26 - WED 31

SUN 28 BOOK ‘EM BOOKS TO PRISONERS WORK PARTY. Read & code letters, pick books, pack ‘em or database ‘em! Sundays 4-7 p.m. or by appt. Thomas Merton Center, Garfield. 412-361-3022.

DANCE

LITERARY

THU 25 - SUN 28

TUE 30 ALL STAR STORY NIGHT. This year’s top storytellers return to compete for title of Year’s Best Storyteller. 7:15 p.m. Riley’s Pour House, Carnegie. 412-279-0770. LET’S SPEAK ENGLISH! Practice conversational English. Tue, 6 p.m. Carnegie Library,

FRI 26 - TUE 30 FAMILY FUN DAYS. Join Phipps for Family Fun Days to visit discovery stations, make crafts, pot plants & more. Dec. 26-30, 11 a.m.-4 p.m. Phipps Conservatory & Botanical Garden, Oakland. 412-622-6914.

BACKYARD EXHIBIT. Musical swing set, sandbox, solar-powered instruments, more. Ongoing Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058. BOUNCE. An interactive exhibit celebrating the world’s most amazing ball. Experience how it moves, how it looks & the story of how it came to be. Ongoing Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058.

SAT 27 FAMILY FRIENDLY KIDS OPEN MIC. Sat, 6 p.m. Hambone’s, Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318. LEARN TO ICE SKATE. Teaching basic skating fundamentals of balance, edge control & stopping. CONTINUES ON PG. 46

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Classes for all ranges of expertise. All ages. Schenley Park Ice Rink. Sat, 10 a.m. Thru Feb. 28 Schenley Park, Oakland. 703-597-6905. MARTY’S MARKET KIDS’ CORNER. Ages 5-11. Sat, 3-5 p.m. Marty’s Market, Strip District. 412-586-7177. MINI FACTORY. Am interactive learning program designed specifically for children ages 3-5 years old & their parents or caregivers that uses contemporary installation art as the basis for enabling parents & educators to explore big ideas. Reservations required. 10-11 a.m. Mattress Factory, North Side. 412-231-3169.

SUN 28

MON 29 FAMILY GAME NIGHT. Last Mon of every month, 5-8 p.m. Dobra Tea, Squirrel Hill. 412-449-9833.

MON 29 - TUE 30 HOLIDAY BASEBALL TOURNAMENT. Minimum of 3 games played. Boys ages 8-11. Register by Dec. 22. Dec. 29-30 Greentree Sportsplex, Green Tree. 412-922-1818.

TUE 30 HOMEWORK HELP. For grades 1-8. Tue, 3:30-5:30 p.m. Assemble, Garfield.

WED 31 HAPPY NOON YEAR! Get ready for the New Year with a countdown to 12 o’clock — noon, that is! Share stories, songs, create a craft, & toast the New Year. 11 a.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912. NEW YEAR’S EVE FAMILY CELEBRATION. Ring in 2015 w/ the whole family at Phipps & participate in an early countdown at 8:45 p.m. 6-9 p.m. Phipps Conservatory & Botanical Garden, Oakland. 412-622-6914.

OUTSIDE TUE 30 SURVIVAL BASICS. Tue, 3-4:30 p.m. Schenley Park, Oakland. 412-477-4677.

WED 31 WEDNESDAY MORNING WALK. Naturalist-led, rain or shine. Wed Beechwood Farms, Fox Chapel. 412-963-6100.

OTHER STUFF FRI 26 AFRICAN DANCE CLASS. Second and Third Fri of every month and Fourth and Last Fri of every month Irma Freeman Center for Imagination, Garfield. 412-924-0634. FRIDAY NIGHT CONTRA DANCE. A social, traditional American dance. No partner needed, beginners welcome, lesson at 7:30. Fri, 8 p.m. Swisshelm Park Community Center, Swissvale. 412-945-0554.

{PHOTO COURTESY OF COREY LECHAT}

Hey, hey, it’s The … Gothees! To celebrate the birthdays of two of The Monkees — Mike Nesmith and Davy Jones were both born on Dec. 30 — the local garage-psych band is playing at the Hollywood Theater. The Gothees’ performance will be followed by a screening of The Monkees’ 1968 film HEAD. The movie, a surreal take-down of the entertainment industry, initially confused audiences and lost buckets of money, but lives on as a well-loved cult classic. Proceeds from the event will benefit the Davy Jones Equine Memorial Foundation. 7:30 p.m. Tue., Dec. 30. 1449 Potomac Ave., Dormont. $10. 412-563-0368 or www.thehollywooddormont.org

FRIDAY NIGHT CREATURE FEATURE. A creature painting & a creature movie. Fri, 7-11 p.m. Thru Jan. 22 The Night Gallery, Lawrenceville. 412-969-7197. GOOD FRIDAYS. 1/2-price regular museum admission & a cash bar. Fri, 5-10 p.m. Thru Jan. 30 Andy Warhol Museum, North Side. 412-237-8300.

10 a.m., Sat., Feb. 7, 10 a.m. and Fri., Feb. 20, 10 a.m. 412-323-4709. PSYCHIC FAIR. Last Sat of every month, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Chapel of Oneness, West Mifflin. 412-770-4961. SCOTTISH COUNTRY DANCING. Lessons 7-8 p.m., social dancing follows. No partner needed. Mon, 7 p.m. and Sat, 7 p.m. Grace Episcopal Church, Mt. Washington. 412-683-5670. BEGINNER TAI CHI CLASSES. SEMBÈNE - THE FILM & ARTS www.pittsburghtaichi.com Sat, FESTIVAL. Celebrate Kwanzaa 9 a.m. Friends Meeting House, with the screening of “Kirikou and Oakland. 412-683-2669. the Sorceress” and The Wayans CHRISTMAS & BEER TRIVIA. Family presents: “Thugaboo 8 p.m. Elwood’s Pub. 724-265-1181. Sneaker Madness” 1:30-3:45 p.m. FESTIVUS FULL PINT BREW Carnegie Library, Homewood, TOUR. Tour of Full Pint Homewood. 412-657-6916. Brewery. Tour starts w/ SOUTH HILLS samples at the East SCRABBLE CLUB. End Growler shop in Free Scrabble games, the Pittsburgh Public all levels. Sat, 1-3 p.m. www. per Market! 11:30 a.m. Mount Lebanon Public pa pghcitym o Pittsburgh Public .c Library, Mt. Lebanon. Market, Strip District. 412-531-1912. 412-323-4709. SPANISH CONVERSATION KOREAN II. Sat, 11 a.m.GROUP. Friendly, informal. At 12:30 p.m. Thru Jan. 31 Carnegie the Starbucks inside Target. Sat, Library, Oakland. 412-622-3116. 3:30-5:30 p.m. Target, East Liberty. LIGHTS, CAMERA, PITTSBURGH! 412-362-6108. THE OFFICIAL PITTSBURGH FILM SWING CITY. Learn & practice OFFICE TOUR. Interactive tour swing dancing skills. Sat, 8 p.m. through city backdrops of movies Wightman School, Squirrel Hill. such as The Dark Knight Rises, 412-759-1569. Perks of Being a Wallflower, WIGLE WHISKEY BARRELHOUSE Flashdance, more. Meet at TOURS. Sat, 12:30 & 2 p.m. Wigle Duquesne Incline. 10 a.m., Sat., Whiskey Barrel House, North Side. Jan. 3, 10 a.m., Sat., Jan. 24, 412-224-2827.

SAT 27

FULL LIST ONLINE

AMNESTY INTERNATIONAL HUMAN RIGHTS CAFE. Weekly letter writing event. Sun, 4-6 p.m. Panera Bread, Oakland. 412-683-3727. CHINESE FOR BEGINNERS. Second and Fourth Sun of every month, 3:30-4:30 p.m. Carnegie Library, Oakland. 412-622-3151. LET’S MAKE TIRAMISU. Learn how to make your own tiramisu in a hands-on preparation class. 3:30 p.m. Mondo Italiano, Regent Square. 412-478-2681. TEA CLASS & TASTING. History of tea, steeping techniques, Storing Tea, Health Benefits, more. Tea samples & European cookies will be served. Reservations required. Sun, 7 p.m. Thru Jan. 25 Margaret’s Fine Imports, Squirrel Hill. 412-422-1606. WISHCRAFT: HOW TO GET WHAT YOU REALLY WANT. Support group for life goals. Sun, 1-2 p.m. Carnegie Library, Squirrel Hill. 412-371-1707. WORLD KALEIDOSCOPE PRESENTS TONE / OVERTONE. Tone/Overtone is a flute & accordion duo w/ Rachel Rue & Keith Cochran that has evolved a style & repertoire all its own. All ages. 2 p.m. Carnegie Library, Oakland. 412-622-3114.

MON 29 MORNING SPANISH LITERATURE & CONVERSATION. Mon, 10 a.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912. SAHAJA MEDITATION. Dimple meditation techniques, which will improve your physical, emotional, psychological, social, and spiritual health Mon, 7:30-8:30 p.m. Thru Jan. 5 Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912. SCOTTISH COUNTRY DANCING. Lessons 7-8 p.m., social dancing follows. No partner needed. Mon, 7 p.m. and Sat, 7 p.m. Grace Episcopal Church, Mt. Washington. 412-683-5670. SPELLING BEE WITH DAVE AND KUMAR. Mon Lava Lounge, South Side. 412-431-5282.

MON 29 - TUE 30 CIRQUE DREAMS HOLIDAZE. A cirque show, Broadway musical & family Christmas spectacular. Over 300 costumes, 20 acts & 30 artists from all over the world. 7:30 p.m. and Tue., Dec. 30, 2 p.m. Benedum Center, Downtown. 412-456-6666.

TUE 30 MONKEES MOVIE MAYHAM. Celebrate the December 30th birthdays of Monkees – Mike Nesmith & Davy Jones w/ a screening of the 1968 film “Head” & a musical performance by The Gothees. 7:30 p.m. Hollywood Theater, Dormont. 412-563-0368. KNOW THE SHOW BEFORE YOU GO: MOTOWN. Hosted by Christopher Rawson, this program allows patrons to gain insight on each production. Light refreshments. Register online. 6:30 p.m. Trust Arts Education Center, Downtown. 412-471-6070. CONTINUES ON PG. 48

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WED 31 AFTERNOON TEA DANCE. Lessons offered to beginners. Wed, 12-2:30 p.m. Thru Feb. 25 Pittsburgh Dance Center, Bloomfield. DETROIT STYLE URBAN BALLROOM DANCE. 3rd floor. Wed, 6:30-8 p.m. Hosanna House, Wilkinsburg. 412-242-4345. ENGLISH CONVERSATION (ESL). Wed, 10 a.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912. LET’S SPEAK ENGLISH! Practice conversational English. Wed, 5-6 p.m. Carnegie Library, Oakland. 412-622-3151. THE PITTSBURGH SHOW OFFS. A meeting of jugglers & spinners. All levels welcome. Wed, 7:30 p.m. Union Project, Highland Park. 412-363-4550. TAROT CARD LESSONS. Wed, 7 p.m. Dobra Tea, Squirrel Hill. 412-449-9833. WEST COAST SWING WEDNESDAYS. Swing dance lessons. Wed, 9 p.m. The Library, South Side. 916-287-1373.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

YOUNG ARTISTS COMPETITION. The competition is open to classical instrumentalists & vocalists who are residents of either Westmoreland or Fayette County or take private music lessons in either of those two counties & are have not graduated high school. Participants compete for performance opportunities. Cash prizes. The postmarked registration deadline is January 9, 2015 for recorded auditions. Live auditions are Sunday, February 1. 724-837-1850. BOBCAT PLAYERS. Auditions for the 2015 season. Jan. 10, 15 & 17. For appointments call or email bobcatplayers@gmail.com. Visit www.bobcatplayers.com for information. 412-953-0237.

Expect “the whole R. Kelly library” and post-holiday helpings of Teddy Riley, Keith Sweat, and Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis when Down & Derby Roller Disco presents its annual New Jack Skate, at Belvedere’s. It’s a late-’80s, early-’90s thing. Parachute pants and black shades are encouraged complements to your rental skates. The DJs are DJ JX4 and Hank D. 9 p.m.-2 a.m. Sat., Dec. 27. 4016 Butler St., Lawrenceville. $6 with RSVP (21+). RSVP at www.downandderby.org.

for more information. McKeesport Little Theater, McKeesport. 724-292-8427. THE REP PROFESSIONAL THEATRE COMPANY. Point Park University’s professional theatre company, is accepting Equity Principal auditions by appointment for the production of the world premiere of “Endless Lawns” by Anthony McKay. Audition appts. Jan. 5, 10am-6pm. Bring a photograph & resume, stapled

[VOLUNTEER OPPORTUNITY]

CHILDREN’S MUSEUM OF PITTSBURGH

If you have a little extra time this season — even just a few hours — the Children’s Museum is seeking volunteers to help with various tasks around the museum, including greeting guests and assisting with special holiday programs running through Jan. 4. Both one-time and ongoing commitments are welcome. Email volunteer@pittsburghkids.org or visit www.pittsburghkids.org for information.

R-ACT THEATRE PRODUCTIONS. Auditions for production of “Do Not Disturb”,Jan. 3 & Jan. 4, 1:30–3:30pm. Seeking 3 men & 3 women. Will be asked to read from the script. Headshot & resume appreciated. 724-775-6844. THE RAGE OF THE STAGE PLAYERS. Auditions for “BLOODY HELL,” A post-apocalyptic stage adaptation of “Dracula.” Call or email rageofthestage@yahoo.com

together. Sides from the script will be provided. Pittsburgh Playhouse, Oakland. 412-392-8141. THE THEATRE FACTORY. Auditions for “Lend Me A Tenor”. Jan. 3, 5-9 pm, & Jan. 4, 12-4 pm. Seeking 4 men & 4 women ages 20 & up; Prepare 2 min. comedic monologue, cold reading from the script. Men be prepared to sing. Bring picture & resume. 724-374-9200.

THE VALLEY PLAYERS OF LIGONIER. Auditions for “Lend Me A Tenor” by Ken Ludwig on Jan. 4, 5-8 pm & Jan.5, 6-8pm Thru Jan. 5, 2015. Ligonier Theater. 724-238-6514.

SUBMISSIONS 2014-2015 WALDMAN INTERNATIONAL ARTS & WRITING COMPETITION. Seeking creative writing, short film & visual arts submissions from middle & high-schoolers exploring the theme of Real Life Superheroes in the Face of Persecution. Submissions accepted through Jan 15, 2015. 412-421-1500. THE DAP CO-OP. Seeking performers & artists to participate in First Fridays - Art in a Box. For more information, email thedapcoopzumba@hotmail.com. 412-403-7357. THE HOUR AFTER HAPPY HOUR REVIEW. Seeking submissions in all genres for fledgling literary magazine curated by members of the Hour After Happy Hour Writing Workshop. afterhappyhourreview.com THE NEW YINZER. Seeking original essays about literature, music, TV or film, & also essays generally about Pittsburgh. To see some examples, visit www.newyinzer.com & view the current issue. Email all pitches, submissions & inquiries to newyinzer@gmail.com. THE POET BAND COMPANY. Seeking various types of poetry. Contact wewuvpoetry@ hotmail.com


CITIZEN POLICE REVIEW BOARD 2015 MEETING DATES AND HOST NEIGHBORHOODS The following calendar maintains the tradition of meeting at 6:00 p.m. on the fourth Tuesday of every calendar month except as noted. The several meetings proposed for Council Chambers attempt to respond to the public recommendation that meeting at a centralized location may encourage increased public attendance. All Meetings Scheduled to Begin at 6:00 p.m. DATE

ADDRESS

NEIGHBORHOOD

January 27, 2015

Council Chambers

510 City-County Bldg 414 Grant Street Pittsburgh, PA 15219 412-255-2142 - office

February 24, 2015

Council Chambers

510 City-County Bldg Pittsburgh, PA 15219

March 24, 2015

Allegheny Center Alliance Church

250 East Ohio Street Pittsburgh, PA 15212 412-321-4333

Council Chambers

510 City-County Bldg Pittsburgh, PA 15219

April 28, 2015

May 26, 2015

Z1

720 Sherwood Avenue Pittsburgh, PA 15204

Sheridan Senior Center

Z6 Freedom Unlimited, Inc. Director: Alma Speed Fox

June 23, 2015

July 28, 2015

Combined with September

Combined with September

September 22, 2015

Council Chambers

510 City-County Bldg Pittsburgh, PA 15219

October 27, 2015

Community Empowerment Association Director: Rashad Byrdsong

7120 Kelly Street Pittsburgh, PA 15208 412-371-3689

November 2015

Combined with December

December 1, 2015

Z2

510 City-County Bldg Pittsburgh, PA 15219

Council Chambers

August 2015

2201 Wylie Avenue Pittsburgh, PA 15219 412-434-0922 - office 412-471-1313 - fax

Z5

Combined with December 510 City-County Bldg Pittsburgh, PA 15219

Council Chambers

(The public will be notified of any change of date or location through media publication.) For Further Information: 412-765-8023 Confidential TipLine: 412-255-CPRB N E W S

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ALL DRESSED UP AND NOWHERE TO GO?

Savage Love {BY DAN SAVAGE}

I’m a short guy and I need advice. I don’t want a small paragraph’s worth of advice, like you gave “Below Their League” a few years ago. I need advice beyond “Women like men taller than them, get over it!” I get it. I’m short (5 foot 2), and most women are taller than me. And women like tall dudes just like I like slender women. Fat women may have it hard, but at least they have their fans and their own sex-object abbreviation: BBW. But where can a short guy go to feel appreciated? Is there an abbreviation or a dating website for us? JESUS CHRIST, I’M LONELY

City Paper Listings Editor Margaret Welsh is here to save your weekend, sharing her picks for the best events going on around town with our BRAND NEW

CP Weekend

PODCAST www.pghcitypaper.com/pittsburgh/ CPWeekendPodcast/Page

“Below Their League,” who wrote to me in August 2010, described himself as a short, slender guy who was only attracted to tall, butch women. He longed to be held in the strong arms of a woman who could snap him in two — and he wasn’t having much luck. This was the totality of my advice for him: “Most women prefer men who are taller than they are. It’s a sad, unavoidable fact, BTL, one you’ll have to accept (just as I had to accept that most men prefer women), and you’ll have to search harder for the lady/ lady arms of your dreams. Not much else you can do about it.” I think that advice is solid, JCIL, but I can see why it would be unsatisfying. So here are a few bonus paragraphs for you … There may be a few women with a fetish for short guys — women who aren’t just open to dating short guys but filled with a panty-dampening, crazy-making lust for short guys — but there aren’t enough of them to form the critical mass necessary to sustain even one website for short guys and the women who admire them. So it looks like you’ll have to redouble your efforts at regular dating websites, JCIL, i.e., “search harder for the lady/lady arms of your dreams.” Christian Rudder, one of the founders of OkCupid, took a look at the impact height has on the dating and mating success of the site’s users. It probably won’t surprise you to learn that taller guys have more sex — just one measure of romantic success — but it may surprise you to learn that extremely tall guys (6 foot 6 and above) don’t get many more “unsolicited messages” than extremely short guys. And then there’s this: “Women six feet or taller are either less attractive to men or are considered too intimidating to message,” Rudder writes. “[But] the data also raises the interesting possibility that these tall women are much more likely to sleep with a man who does approach them. Compare the 6’0” woman to her 5’4” counterpart: The taller woman gets hit on about two-thirds as much, yet has had slightly more sex partners.” The takeaway for you, JCIL: Try hitting on taller women.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 12.24/12.31.2014

ALONE AND AFRAID

You didn’t mention seeking professional help, AAA, and maybe that’s because you fear being smarter than the shrink in the room. But cognitive behavioral therapy is supposed to be an effective treatment for people with psychopathic tendencies. The goal isn’t to change you or rewire your brain, as that’s most likely impossible, but to change how you approach and interact with people. Also, AAA, a lot of people who are in relationships — even people who find it easy to interact with others — struggle with feelings of isolation. That’s not uncommon. And there are tons of people out there who aren’t psychopaths (or on the scale) who can describe their romantic histories in the same apocalyptic terms that you do. Get help, keep things in perspective, live your life, do shit, go places, even if you have to go alone for now.

“THERE ARE TONS OF PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO AREN’T PSYCHOPATHS WHO CAN DESCRIBE THEIR ROMANTIC HISTORIES IN THE SAME APOCALYPTIC TERMS THAT YOU DO.”

I am a straight male who has never been in a romantic relationship. I am not a

New content daily at www.pghcitypaper.com

virgin, but every romantic relationship I’ve tried to pursue has ended in disaster. A few things you should know about me: While I am not a full-on clinical psychopath by a long shot, I am on that scale and do have psychopathic tendencies. I know this makes me sound like an asshole (and I probably am an asshole), but I am often the smartest person in the room. I wish this wasn’t the case. Bottom line: I am extremely lonely. I have trouble relating to people, and they have trouble relating to me. I want to change how I relate to others, I want to be in a healthy relationship, and most of all I want to stop feeling so lonely. But, I don’t even know where to start. Any guidance would be appreciated.

I am a college student just trying to get through my senior year with some halfway decent grades and a smidge of sanity. As such, I have basically given up the social scene. I avoid sexual or romantic interactions. The problem is, while I recognize that I will have plenty of time for social stuff once I graduate (and some far better prospects available with a degree to my name), the rest of me is having trouble getting with the program. My weekends are a lot quieter and my wallet is more comfortable, but sometimes I can’t help feeling lonely. Is there anything in your bag of tricks for this selfimposed hermit? LOSING OUT NEARLY EVERYDAY

Masturbate daily, LONE, and remind yourself before, during and after blowing those loads that your isolation is something you chose when you prioritized your education. It isn’t something that was imposed on you by circumstance or height or mental illness — it’s also a problem that will solve itself in six months. This week, listen to the Lovecast live from Seattle’s Neptune Theatre at savagelovecast.com.

SEND YOUR QUESTIONS TO MAIL@SAVAGELOVE.NET AND FIND THE SAVAGE LOVECAST (DAN’S WEEKLY PODCAST) AT THESTRANGER.COM/SAVAGE


FOR THE WEEK OF

Free Will Astrology

12.24-12.31

{BY ROB BREZSNY}

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): When he was 37 years old, actor Jack Nicholson found out that Ethel May, the woman he had always called his mother, was in fact his grandma. Furthermore, his “older sister” June was actually his mom, who had given birth to him when she was 17. His relatives had hidden the truth from him. I suspect that in 2015 you will uncover secrets and missing information that will rival Nicholson’s experience. Although these revelations may initially be confusing or disruptive, in the long run they will heal and liberate you. Welcome them!

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “Meupareunia” is an English word that refers to a sexual adventure in which only one of the participants has a good time. I’ll be bold and predict that you will not experience a single instance of meupareunia in 2015. That’s because I expect you’ll be steadily upgrading your levels of empathy and your capacity for receptivity. You will be getting better and better at listening to your intimate allies and reading their emotional signals. I predict that synergy and symbiosis will be your specialties. Both your desire to please and your skill at giving pleasure will increase, as will your understanding of how many benefits you can reap by being a responsive partner.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “Be good and you will be lonesome,” said Mark Twain. Do you agree? I don’t — at least as it applies to your life in 2015. According to my understanding of the long-term astrological omens, you will attract an abundance of love and luck by being good — by expressing generosity, deepening your compassion, cultivating integrity and working for justice and truth and beauty. That doesn’t mean you should be a pushover or doormat. Your resolve to be good must be leavened by a determination to deepen your self-respect. Your eagerness to do the right thing has to include a commitment to raising your levels of self-care.

the five “mother sauces.” But he wasn’t content to be a star in his own country. At the age of 44, he began his “conquest of London,” bringing his spectacular dining experience to British restaurants. He thought it might be hard to sell his new clientele on frogs’ legs, a traditional French dish, so he resorted to trickery. On the menu, he listed it as “Nymphs of the Dawn.” According to my reading of the omens, this is an example of the hocuspocus that will be your specialty in 2015. And I suspect you will get away with it every time as long as your intention is not selfish or manipulative, but rather generous and constructive.

In 2015, I invite you to adopt some of that push-itto-the-edge attitude for your personal use, Libra. Maybe not full time; maybe not with the same manic intensity that Thompson did. Rather, simply tap into it as needed — whenever you’ve got to up your game or raise your intensity level or rouse the extra energy you need TO ACHIEVE TOTAL, WONDROUS, RESOUNDING VICTORY!!! The coming months will be your time to go all the way, hold nothing back and quest for the best and the most and the highest.

CANCER (June 21-July 22):

Twenty miles long, the Onyx River is the longest body of moving water on the continent of Antarctica. Most of the year it’s ice, though. It actually flows for just two or three months during the summer. Let’s hope that continues to be the case for the foreseeable future. It would be a shame if global warming got so extreme that the Onyx melted permanently. But now let’s talk about your own metaphorical equivalent of the Onyx: a potentially flowing part of your

The entomologist Charles P. Alexander (1889-1981) devoted much of his professional life to analyzing the insect known as the crane fly. He identified over 11,000 different species, drew 15,000 illustrations of the creatures, and referred to his lab as “Crane Fly Haven.” That’s the kind of single-minded intention I’d love to see you adopt during the first six months of 2015, Cancerian. What I’m imagining is that you will choose a specific, well-defined area within which you will gleefully explore and experiment and improvise. Is there a subject or task or project you would have fun pursuing with that kind of intensity? In Don DeLillo’s novel Underworld, Cotter Martin is a young boy living in New York in the 1950s. The following description is about him. “In school they tell him sometimes to stop looking out the window. This teacher or that teacher. The answer is not out there, they tell him. And he always wants to say that’s exactly where the answer is.” I propose we regard this passage as one of your themes in 2015, Leo. In other words, be skeptical of any authority who tells you where you should or should not be searching for the answers. Follow your own natural inclination, even if at first it seems to be nothing more than looking out the window.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20):

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):

Beetles are abundant and ubiquitous. Scientists have identified more than 350,000 species, and they are always discovering new ones. In 2011, for example, they conferred official recognition on 3,485 additional types of beetles. I’m seeing a parallel development in your life, Taurus. A common phenomenon that you take for granted harbors mysteries that are worth exploring. Something you regard as quite familiar actually contains interesting features you don’t know about. In 2015, I hope you will open your mind to the novelties and exotica that are hidden in plain sight.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Auguste Escoffier (1846-1935) was an influential French chef who defined and standardized

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “The best way to keep a prisoner from escaping is to make sure he never knows he’s in prison.” That quote is attributed to both Russian author Fyodor Dostoevsky and Russian author Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn. Regardless of who said it, I urge you to keep it in mind throughout 2015. Like all of us, you are trapped in an invisible prison: a set of beliefs or conditioned responses or bad habits that limit your freedom to act. That’s the bad news. The good news is that in the coming months, you are poised to discover the exact nature of your invisible prison, and then escape it. Make three predictions about your life in 2015. Tell me at Truthrooster@gmail.com.

get your yoga on!

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22):

“Hell is the suffering of being unable to love,” wrote novelist J.D. Salinger. Using that definition, I’m happy to announce that you have a good chance of avoiding hell altogether in 2015. If there has been any deficiency in your power to express and bestow love, I think you will correct it. If you have been so intent on getting love that you have been neglectful in giving love, you will switch your focus. I invite you to keep a copy of this horoscope in your wallet for the next 12 months. Regard it as your “Get Out of Hell Free” card.

ARIES (March 21-April 19):

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21):

life that is often frozen. I’d love to see it heat up and thaw. I’d love it to be streaming and surging most of the time. And in 2015, I think that’s a distinct possibility. Consider making the following declaration your battle cry: I am the Flow Master!

“It is always important to know when something has reached its end,” writes Paulo Coelho in his book The Zahir. Use this advice heroically in 2015, Virgo. Wield it to clear away anything that no longer serves you, that weighs you down or holds you back. Prepare the way for the new story that will begin for you around your next birthday. “Closing circles, shutting doors, finishing chapters,” Coelho says, “it doesn’t matter what we call it; what matters is to leave in the past those moments in life that are over.”

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “On some nights I still believe,” said rascal journalist Hunter S. Thompson, “that a car with the gas needle on empty can run about 50 more miles if you have the right music very loud on the radio.”

GO TO REALASTROLOGY.COM TO CHECK OUT ROB BREZSNY’S EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES AND DAILY TEXT-MESSAGE HOROSCOPES. THE AUDIO HOROSCOPES ARE ALSO AVAILABLE BY PHONE AT 1-877-873-4888 OR 1-900-950-7700

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER

CLASSIFIEDS FOR INFORMATION ON HOW TO PLACE A CLASSIFIEDS ADVERTISEMENT, CALL 412-316-3342 EXT. 189

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GREATEST GIFT

{BY JIMMY CVETIC}

It’s hard to explain to those that have everything That there are those who have nothing I watched an attorney’s wife Smack him on his little dome Because of my swearing. Guess no matter how hard I try to tell her It wouldn’t make a difference But these are true stories. Real people I met along the way. Like the joke of little Johnny who liked to swear So his mom hid all his presents And put shit in his stocking And little piles of shit around the tree. So that morning when he woke Johnny was running around real happy And when his mom asked, “Why are you so happy?” Johnny said, “I know there’s a puppy here somewhere.” That’s when I was six years old It was Christmas Eve Just like Johnny I was running real fast Around the Christmas tree And the empty stockings And the colorful red and green lights. I was moving faster than my little feet could carry me, Strung out on candy canes Eggnog. And great anticipation

My sister stuck out her foot And I tripped Flew past the strung Christmas cards And mistletoe Right into the corner of the old wooden TV Striking my coo-coo Landing headfirst under the tree Next to the Nativity set Baby Jesus Mary And Joseph Knocking over sheep Landing next to the three kings Under a camel’s ass. My block was bleeding real bad And I was seeing stars Christmas balls Icicles and angels But by the strength of love My mother picking me up And carrying me to the big red couch Holding me on her big lap And I was crying. Could taste the salt tears And was real scared. Could feel the warm blood And pain on the noggin. My sister’s yelling, “Ohhh shit! He’s going to need stitches.” My mother gently rocking me And her soothing voice and my sob. But my father, who was a wise old man, Closed the wound with his steel-mill-strong fingers And dishrag pressure. Stopped the flow of blood And wrapped my head like a Christmas gift With cotton gauze And a Christmas garland bandage. I’ll never forget my father picking me up And I rested my wrapped head on his chest He carried me to my room Stopping at the colorful painted windows And I remember the cold frost and he wiped the cold window pane. I saw the bright heavenly stars. In my life I was never more secure And warm And it was the greatest Christmas present any child could Ever ask or ever have in the whole wide universe. I N F O@ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

Jimmy Cvetic performs his poem, “The Greatest Gift,” online at www.pghcitypaper.com.

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Profile for Pittsburgh City Paper

December 24, 2014  

Pittsburgh City Paper Volume 24 Issue 52

December 24, 2014  

Pittsburgh City Paper Volume 24 Issue 52