July 31, 2013

WWW.PGHCITYPAPER.COM | 07.31/08.07.2013

MISSING THE POINT? QUESTIONS SURROUND POINT PARK REDEVELOPMENT DOWNTOWN 34

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

EVENTS 8.17 – 2pm ARTIST TALK: GENESIS BREYER P-ORRIDGE Free with Museum admission/ Members Free

8.24 – 2pm VOICES GALLERY TALK: QUEER, BROWN AND IN STEELTOWN WITH RACHEL RODRIGUEZ AND AYANAH MOOR Free with Museum admission/ Members Free

8.30 – 8pm FILM SCREENING: CREATING THE PANDROGYNE: CELEBRATING BREYER P-ORRIDGE WITH GENESIS BREYER P-ORRIDGE IN PERSON Tickets $10

8.31 – 2pm VOICES GALLERY TALK: TROUBLING THE LINE: AN EXCERPT – POETRY READING AND CONVERSATION WITH JENNY JOHNSON AND FRIENDS Free with Museum admission/ Members Free

Psychic TV / PTV3

9.7 – 8pm TRANS-Q LIVE! Tickets $10/$8 Members & students FREE parking in The Warhol lot.

featuring the debut screening of Psychic TV: Dreams Less Sweet

9.19 – 8pm SOUND SERIES: SCOUT NIBLETT Tickets $15/$12 Members & students

8.16 – 8pm New Hazlett Theater | Tickets $25/$20 Members & students

We welcome Psychic TV / PTV3 for a rare performance at New Hazlett Theater. Fronted by performance and visual artist, Genesis Breyer P-Orridge, Psychic TV (born out of Industrial Music pioneers, Throbbing Gristle) made highly innovative and provocative music from the early 80’s to mid-90’s, blending elements of psychedelia and dance with Industrial sounds (known as “hyperdelic”). In 2003, drummer Edley ODowd of the legendary NYC rock band Toilet Boys persuaded Genesis to rekindle her rock spirit and Psychic TV, which became known as “PTV3”. The performance is presented in connection with the exhibition, Genesis Breyer P-Orridge: S/HE IS HER/E on view through September 15 at The Warhol.

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The Andy Warhol Museum receives state arts funding support through a grant from the Pennsylvania Council on the Arts, a state agency funded by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania; the National Endowment for the Arts, a federal agency and The Heinz Endowments. Further support is provided by the Allegheny Regional Asset District.

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“Point Park has more restored buildings than anyone else in Downtown.”

— Arthur Ziegler of Pittsburgh History & Landmarks Foundation, on the school’s controversial redevelopment plans

[LAST PAGE] the Body of Christ. / It landed 55 “Iin caught the middle of my paten / And everything became more holy.” — Former altar boy Jimmy Cvetic recalls a childhood religious epiphany

{REGULAR & SPECIAL FEATURES} NEWS OF THE WEIRD BY CHUCK SHEPHERD 16 EVENTS LISTINGS 38 SAVAGE LOVE BY DAN SAVAGE 46 FREE WILL ASTROLOGY BY ROB BREZSNY 48 CROSSWORD PUZZLE BY BEN TAUSIG 52 +

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Editor CHRIS POTTER News Editor CHARLIE DEITCH Arts & Entertainment Editor BILL O’DRISCOLL Music Editor ANDY MULKERIN Associate Editor AL HOFF Listings Editor MARGARET WELSH Assistant Listings Editor JESSICA BOGDAN Staff Writers AMYJO BROWN, LAUREN DALEY Staff Photographer HEATHER MULL Interns OLIVIA LAMMEL, KIRA SCAMMELL

VOLUME 23 + ISSUE 31

GENERAL POLICIES: Contents copyrighted 2013

by Steel City Media. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without written permission of the publisher. The opinions expressed in Pittsburgh City Paper are those of the author and not necessarily of Steel City Media. LETTER POLICY: Letters, faxes or e-mails must be signed and include town and daytime phone number for confirmation.

We may edit for length and clarity. DISTRIBUTION: Pittsburgh City Paper is published weekly by Steel City Media and is available free of charge at select distribution locations. One copy per reader; copies of past issues may be purchased for $3.00 each, payable in advance to Pittsburgh City Paper. FIRST CLASS MAIL SUBSCRIPTIONS: Available for $175 per year, $95 per half year. No refunds.

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“THERE ARE ALWAYS GOING TO BE UNDUE INFLUENCES IN THESE SITUATIONS.”

INCOMING Pittsburgh Party Pedaler allows patrons to work up a thirst (July 24) “Let’s mix bicycling and drinking. The only possibly more foolish notion is: Hey, let’s invest in this! Sorry, but this is not a good idea.”

— Web comment from “Vannevar”

$

BILL PEDUTO

1,248,415.49 9

TOTAL AMOUNT OF CONTRIBUTIONS OVER LIMITS M ** $

JACK WAGNER AG

1,199,843.50

“In case you didn’t read the article, it’s about being out with friends and having fun. There is no alcohol served on the bike.

It is a party bus, only people-powered. Our tour through the Strip was a BLAST!! We stopped at a couple of establishments and had a good time with our friends. It was a fun way to get about town and enjoy the company of many friends!! Glad it’s in our town!!”

— Web comment from “Jack Morgan”

JAKE WHEATLEY

$

74,080.00

1,582.90

TOTAL AMOUNT OF CONTRIBUTIONS*

Local Artist Completes 2,000 Free Painting (July 19, online only)

$

23,000

758

6 69

$

1,073.62

$

901.38

* A.J. Richardson, also a candidate for mayor, reported no contributions collected as of May 10 and has not filed a 30-day post-primary report. * Wheatley’s reported total is incomplete. He has not yet filed all the required documents with Allegheny County Elections Division, which has sent him an incomplete notice. ** Prior to April 3, there were limits on the amount donors could contribute.

SOURCES: PEOPLE FOR PEDUTO: CAMPAIGN FINANCE ANNUAL REPORT 2012, AND SECOND-FRIDAY PRE-PRIMARY AND 30-DAY POST-PRIMARY REPORTS; FRIENDS OF JACK WAGNER: SECOND-FRIDAY PRIMARY AND 30-DAY POST-PRIMARY REPORTS; WHEATLEY 4 MAYOR: SECOND-FRIDAY PRE-PRIMARY REPORT; A.J. RICHARDSON: SECOND-FRIDAY PRIMARY REPORT

The area’s lone import video-game outlet finds it footing (July 24)

— The first tweet from Steelers coach Mike Tomlin (@CoachTomlin) after joining Twitter July 26

253,376

1,385

$

th

“Hello Twitter.

Expect no BS from me. Just straight fire!”

$

AVERAGE CONTRIBUTION PER DONOR WHO CONTRIBUTED MORE THAN $50

“Thank goodness the Committee’s votes were cast on paper rather than in electronic machines. Recounting was possible! Mr. Ceoffe should accept the vote as cast, and save his indignity for non-recountable votes cast — such as in our general elections.”

— Web comment from “Audrey Glickman”

“I recently spent ten angry minutes (unrelated) parked outside this very establishment and thus can affirm all this as basically true. It was also very humid there, which this article does not mention.”

— Web comment from “Donley Sweeney”

260,000

NUMBER OF DONORS CONTRIBUTING $50 OR MORE UT

Deb Gross, Allegheny County Democrats respond to Ceoffe lawsuit (July 25, online only)

“I’ve been on Ali’s wait list for a few months now and wholeheartedly support and appreciate her endeavor and all around good will.”

— Web comment from “JK”

$

P

BEYOND LIMITS

HILIP AMERIS, president and business manager for the Laborers’ District Council of Western Pennsylvania, is short and to the point.

“We did what we had to do,” he says when asked about the $133,000 the council’s political action committee and a related PAC, WUF, gave to Pittsburgh City Councilor and Democratic mayoral nominee Bill Peduto during his primary campaign.

That money accounted for 11 percent of Peduto’s campaign war chest, the largest contribution from any one source. But it isn’t the only eyebrow-raising contribution received by Peduto or his opponents, former state auditor general Jack Wagner and state Rep. Jake Wheatley, according to a review of contributions conducted by City Paper.

This year’s mayoral race was financed with more than $ 2.5 million — and more

than $600,000 of that came in contributions of $10,000 or more.

There is more than a little irony in those findings. This year’s mayoral race was set to be the highest-profile test of the city’s 2009

Campaign-finance reform was supposed to level the playing field in local elections, but $2.5 million raised in mayor’s race shows it was the same old ballgame {BY AMYJO BROWN} campaign-finance law, which sought to limit the influence of large-dollar contributors. But those limits — $4,000 for individuals and $8,000 for committees — were lifted

April 3 by Allegheny County Common Pleas Judge Joseph James. Within days of that ruling, money began flooding in.

To determine the effect of lifting the limits shortly before the May 21 primary election, CP reviewed the final campaignfinance reports recently filed by the committees People for Peduto, Friends of Jack Wagner and Jake Wheatley 4 Mayor.

What we found: Peduto’s cash contributions totaled $1,248,415.49. Wagner’s totaled $1,199,843.50.

State Rep. Jake Wheatley, who was third in the race and whose campaignfinance reports are incomplete, raised at least $74,080. A little more than half of that came from two donors: $29,000 from state Rep. Dwight Evans (who serves Philadelphia’s District 203) and $10,000 from Pittsburgh Mayor Luke Ravenstahl, who chose CONTINUES ON PG. 08

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BEYOND LIMITS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 06

not to run for re-election, but worked hard the race in March, after Ravenstahl’s surto defeat Peduto. prise announcement that he would not Of the total contributions to all seek re-election. three candidates, about 21 percent — or Still, after James’ ruling, Wagner gen$ 536,376 — exceeded what the limits erated $ 260,000 in contributions that would have been had they not been lifted exceeded the now-defunct limits. Peduto

by Judge James. raised almost as much.

Peduto authored the original campaignHad the rules stayed in place, would it finance reform law and had filed a court have made a difference? challenge to his opponents’ use of personal “It’s a very difficult thing to analyze,” resources and campaign contributions col- says Wagner, who received about 40 perlected in previous races where limits were cent of the Democratic primary vote, comnot in place. But he says he benefited from pared to Peduto’s roughly 52 percent. “I the judge’s decision. don’t think, in all frankness, that changes “Whatever the rules are, you adapt your during this particular race would have game to them,” Peduto says, adding that his changed the outcome.” campaign intended from the beginning to Even Wheatley says the limits would hit a $1.2 million goal. But instead of spend- have done little to help his campaign. ing the time collecting that from a broader “Bill Peduto had [Allegheny County base, Peduto says, the conExecutive] Rich Fitzgerald, tributions — particularly helped him raise mon“THERE WERE SOME who those of the labor unions — ey, and the SEIU and other VERY SIGNIFICANT big labor unions,” Wheat“meant I had more time to CONTRIBUTIONS IN ley says. “Jack had his own be out in the field.” statewide [network], and THIS RACE BY IN THE COURT’S decision ORGANIZATIONS THAT he had pretty much a lot of corporate Pittsburgh. If you lies another irony. The HAVE A STRONG don’t have some established campaign limits were INTEREST IN CITY entity [helping], or you’re voided thanks to a candinot an established entity, date who was no longer OPERATIONS.” it’s hard to break in — with in the race: City Controller caps or without caps.”

Michael Lamb, who dropped out April 1.

And, “let’s be frank,” he says. “There are But by that point, Peduto had already filed the legal challenge against the ac- always going to be undue influences in counting practices of both Lamb and Wag- these situations, caps or no caps.”

Indeed, the campaign-finance law ner. Unhappy with what he called the ordinance’s “poorly written” language, Judge wouldn’t have reined in one of the biggest James ruled that Lamb had at one point fi- spenders in the campaign: Mayor Ravennanced his campaign with $52,000 from his stahl’s Committee for a Better Pittsburgh, own pocket, running afoul of self-financing which spent its cash on independent ads provisions in the ordinance. Under the targeting Peduto. Independent expendiprovision — which was intended to keep tures, as opposed to money given to a cancandidates on a level playing field with didate, are not governed by the law. wealthy rivals — if a candidate used more than $50,000 of his own money without de- THE REASON often cited for limits on conclaring an intention to do so in advance, the tributions by any one person or organilimits on all candidates would be lifted. zation is the fear of influence — perhaps Lamb says that rule was never violated. less the influence on the race itself than A $ 2,000 contribution he gave the cam- the influence on the winning candidate paign was refunded before the $50,000 loan after the election. was extended, he claims.

“There were some very significant con“There was never a period of time when tributions in this race by organizations that there was more than $ 50,000 in the ac- have a strong interest in city operations,” count,” he says. But he was not called to tes- says Lamb. tify to that fact. Other possible flaws in the The law, as it is, “is one of the worst conlaw, although debated, were not addressed structed pieces of legislation I’ve ever seen,” by the court. he says. “But we need it. We need limits.”

In court and outside of it, both mayoral Unions, for example, were among frontrunners professed a desire to keep Peduto and Wagner’s largest single donors, the limits in place. But lifting the contri- accounting for 14 percent of their contribubution limits doesn’t appear to have pro- tions. Union workers stand to benefit from vided a significant advantage for either of city jobs and construction projects such as them. Peduto raised 4 percent more than the North Shore redevelopment and other Wagner, but Peduto had begun fund-rais- public projects overseen by elected officials. ing in September 2012; Wagner entered Wagner won the backing of the city CONTINUES ON PG. 10

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

TOP CONTRIBUTORS DONOR

AMOUNT

DESCRIPTION OF DONOR

BILL PEDUTO 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

Western PA Laborers’’ Political Action Fund Friends of Rich Fitzgerald WUF Local 32BJ PA American Dream Fund William F. Benter Millcraft Committee for Effective State Government IMPEL Henry H. Armstrong Associates M. Robert Mistick

$

79,000 58,000 $ 54,000 $ 25,000 $ 12,500 $ 11,000 $ 10,000 $ 10,000 $ 10,000

Labor union, represents construction & public service employees Allegheny County Executive Labor union, affiliated with Western PA Laborers’ Labor union, represents service workers Philanthropist, medical transcription software Developer managing Fifth and Market Project Downtown Lobby firm whose clients have included Allegheny County & Giant Eagle Investment adviser Owner and president of Mistick Construction; portfolio includes Bedford Hill Apartments, Dinwiddie Street Housing, Garfield Commons

$

Married to William F. Benter

1 IBEW Local No. 5 rating En rs 2 International Union of Operating Engineers Local 66 PAC Club

$

Labor union, represents electrical workers Labor union

3 4 5 6

$

10 Vivian Fung

$

10,000

JACK WAGNER 52,500 34,000

$

Charles L. Hammel III R.M. Scaife International Brotherhood of Boilermakerss Lo Local 154 Ira J. Gumberg

25,000 25,000 $ 20,000 $ 20,000

Trucking, president of PITT OHIO Express Owner and publisher Pittsburgh Tribune-Review Labor union Real estate, president and CEO of J.J. Gumberg Co.; portfolio includes big-box stores

7 Commonwealth Heritage 8 James Rudolph

$

Law firm, affiliated with Elliott Greenleaf Real-estate investor whose portfolio includes Grant Building and Henry W. Oliver Building, Downtown

9 Steamfitters Local 449 10 Edward B. Dunlap

$

$

16,000 15,000

$

15,000 15,000

$

Labor union CEO of Centimark, a roofing and flooring contractor

JAKE WHEATLEY* 1 Citizens to Elect Dwight Evans ns 2 Ravenstahl for Mayor** 3 Keith B. Keys

$

29,000 10,000 $ 4,000

State House representative serving Philadelphia Mayor of Pittsburgh Real estate, CEO and president KBK Enterprises; porfolio includes Addison Terrace

4 Pittsburgh Black Political Convention 5 Charles S. Sanders 6 M. Robert Mistick

$

3,000 2,500 $ 2,000

PAC headed by former City Councilor Sala Udin CEO Urban Lending Solutions Owner and president of Mistick Construction Company; portfolio includes Bedford Hill Apartments, Dinwiddie Street Housing, Garfield Commons

7 Gregory R. Spencer 8 Merrill P. Stabile

$

President, Randall Industries, manufacturer of industrial cleaning supplies President of Alco Parking Corp.

$

$

2,000 2,000

$

* AS OF JULY 24, JAKE WHEATLEY HAD NOT FILED A COMPLETE 30-DAY, POST-PRIMARY REPORT WITH THE ALLEGHENY COUNTY ELECTIONS DIVISION, LEAVING HIS DONOR LIST AND AMOUNTS RECEIVED INCOMPLETE. ** THE CONTRIBUTION FROM MAYOR LUKE RAVENSTAHL’S PAC WAS NOT DISCLOSED IN WHEATLEY’S CAMPAIGN-FINANCE REPORTS, BUT WAS REPORTED AS A CONTRIBUTION BY THE PAC ITSELF, AND WHEATLEY CONFIRMED ITS ACCEPTANCE. SOURCING: PEOPLE FOR PEDUTO 2012 ANNUAL CAMPAIGN-FINANCE REPORT FOR MAYORAL RACE AND ITS SECOND-FRIDAY PRE-PRIMARY AND 30-DAY POST-PRIMARY REPORTS; FRIENDS OF JACK WAGNER SECOND-FRIDAY AND 30-DAY POST-PRIMARY REPORTS; WHEATLEY 4 MAYOR SECOND-FRIDAY PRE-PRIMARY REPORT AND LATE CONTRIBUTION REPORTS; AND RAVENSTAHL FOR MAYOR PAC. A.J. RICHARDSON, ALSO A CANDIDATE IN THE PRIMARY ELECTION, REPORTED RECEIVING NO CONTRIBUTIONS ON HIS SECOND-FRIDAY PRE-PRIMARY REPORT. NO POST-PRIMARY REPORT WAS FILED.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

police and firefighters’ unions, but much of his union support came from buildingtrades locals like plumbers and carpenters.

Wagner’s top contributor — at $52,500 — was the International Brotherhood of Electrical Workers Local 5. Representatives of the union did not respond to a request for an interview.

Peduto got backing from city paramedics, as well as the Service Employees International Union. But the Laborers were far and away his biggest supporter. “[Peduto] has a lot of the same interests that we have,” says Ameris, of the Laborers’ District Council. “The money was a byproduct of that.”

Of the Laborers’ largesse, Peduto says: “Quite honestly, they put their necks out to help us win this race.”

Fitzgerald, who also topped Peduto’s list of contributors with a $ 58,000 donation, says it’s fair to ask what donors want in return for their money. But that doesn’t mean candidates can be bought and sold: “It comes down to the candidate: who they are taking the contribution from and why they are taking it. To rule them all the same wouldn’t be accurate.”

Fitzgerald says what he wants for his money is simple: “I just want to have a partner — not to do what I say or what my administration says, but someone we can work with.”

Bob Ewanco, a lobbyist and owner of Impel Strategies, who gave Peduto $10,000, echoes that sentiment. He says Peduto’s

ideas impressed him.

“That was a significant amount for me, believe me. I’m no big corporation,” he says.

But he acknowledges that it doesn’t hurt his clients — Giant Eagle among them — if he has a relationship with the city’s next mayor, he says.

Peduto, for his part, says, “It is foolish for any elected official to say that money doesn’t influence access. Obviously that’s why people contribute, that’s why they volunteer.”

But he says the number of contributors to his race — more than 1,300 committees and individuals combined — would make it difficult for any one donor to have undue influence. “There’s only a certain amount of time in my life that I could offer access,” he says.

Peduto says he doesn’t expect the size of the contributions to play a role in how he makes decisions if he is elected in November. Peduto still must face Republican challenger Josh Wander (who raised $ 750 during the primary, according to his reports), and the possibility of an independent challenge by Council President Darlene Harris.

As for whether another attempt at campaign-finance reform is in the cards, Peduto says he’ll leave that to his colleagues on council.

“I would hope that [they] would feel the need to put it back and make it right,” he says. “I’d support it as long as it followed the original intent and spirit of the original bill, to ensure no one has undue influence.”

A B ROW N @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

{BY MATT BORS}

IDIOTBOX

ON THE RECORD A Conversation with Natalia Rudiak {BY LAUREN DALEY} Councilor Natalia Rudiak wants to make it easier for parents with young children to visit city-owned buildings. That’s why she recently introduced legislation to make baby-changing stations mandatory in restrooms in city-owned buildings and facilities.

Baby-changing tables are not required by state law, but one national study cited in the proposed legislation found that nearly 90 percent of parents visited public places with their children. Of those visitors, according to the study, three-quarters deliberately sought out establishments that had the tables.

Rudiak says she became aware of the lack of accommodations when friends and constituents raised the issue after visiting the City-County Building and other cityowned spaces, like pools and recreation centers, in District 4. The lack of such resources “is ridiculous,” especially at the City-County Building, she says, “considering we are the center of democracy for the region and we don’t even have basic services for parents.”

Rudiak introduced the bill July 23.

It comes before council for discussion this week.

She recently spoke to City Paper about the proposal, which, if approved, would go into effect by the end of 2014.

PITTSBURGH CITY

Pittsburgh City Councilor Natalia Rudiak

HOW MANY FACILITIES ARE YOU ANTICIPATING WILL BE AFFECTED? [The legislation] basically directs the director of operations in the city, as well as department directors, to put their heads together to see where they should go.

Some [facilities] may already have them.

But they would be in cityowned, publicly accessible restrooms. We’re not dictating they need to be in fire stations, but as far as rec centers, swimming pools, the City-County Building, 200 Ross Street and senior centers — people look at senior centers and say, “That’s totally ridiculous, Rudiak,” but we have community meetings in senior spaces.

“WE’RE NOT TALKING ABOUT A HUGE COST.”

THE BILL REQUIRES THE STATIONS IN MEN’S RESTROOMS AS WELL AS WOMEN’S. WHAT PROMPTED THAT ADDITION? I can’t tell you how many thank-yous I’ve gotten from men on this issue. I received a very memorable email from a guy who was explaining that he’s a stay-at-home dad and takes care of the kids. When he comes Downtown to visit his wife and takes his kids different places and he needs to change his son, he’s been ridiculed by establishments asking about baby-changing stations. I think when you go to a lot of establishments … they have baby-changing stations in women’s bathrooms but not men’s. I think this is where we can plant our flag in the ground and say, “Dads are parents, too.”

WHO'S THE BEST POKER PLAYER IN PITTSBURGH?

SOMEONE ACTUALLY SAID, “THAT’S TOTALLY RIDICULOUS, RUDIAK”?

In the [Pittsburgh] Post-Gazette [online] comments, some people have been like, “Argh you’re going to raise our taxes to put them in,” and I’m like, “Take a step back.”

SO WHAT’S YOUR RESPONSE TO PEOPLE WHO THINK IT’S A “RIDICULOUS” USE OF TAX DOLLARS? AND WHAT WILL THIS END UP COSTING THE CITY? The fact of the matter is, this is something other cities and states do. … You can go into a local McDonald’s and there’s a [babychanging] station. This is a convenience adults and kids should expect from any establishment, and frankly, city government should be a leader in these things, and not last on the list.

I want to sit down with Councilman [Bill] Peduto, who’s the lead for [the mayoral race], to talk about the capital budget. …. I don’t have a cost estimate yet, but if you just Google baby-changing stations wholesale, they’re around $ 150 each. We’re not talking about a huge cost.

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ban on same-sex marriage was merely a moral outrage. Just your basic case of hidebound prejudice trumping civil liberties.

Today, though, the ban may be costing my bosses some money. So never mind my usual weekly prattle about human rights: This shit is about to get real.

In June, the U.S. Supreme Court held that federal agencies must recognize samesex marriages in states where they are legal. That was a big step forward for samesex couples. But for employers in the states that don’t recognize gay marriage, like Pennsylvania, it’s a huge kick in the ass.

In states like New York or Maryland, where same-sex marriage is legal, the Supreme Court hands workers a potentially huge windfall. Social Security and Medicare benefits alone represent a “bonanza for couples in the 13 states that recognize gay marriage,” the Wall Street Journal reported in mid-July.

Spousal and survivor benefits could be worth in the “tens, maybe hundreds, of thousands of dollars.”

Opponents of same-sex marriage have warned that the ruling will hurt businesses, by requiring them to offer health benefits to same-sex partners. On the other hand, workers in those 13 states have just received a sizable bonus, at no cost to their employers.

If you’re running an auto-body shop in Cranberry or some other backwater, maybe you don’t care. But if you’re running a corporation that competes nationwide for talent — as even City Paper does — you are now at a serious competitive disadvantage if you want to hire an employee who happens to be gay. Thanks to the Supreme Court, a paper in Baltimore can now dangle thousands of dollars in additional benefits to a talented gay reporter ... even while offering the same paltry salary we do.

When Harrisburg politicians barred gay marriage in 1996, they weren’t just depriving same-sex couples of happiness. They were also constraining the freedom of state employers to hire who we want.

“There are companies in Pennsylvania that have already point-blank told me that they have lost people because of that,” says Ted Martin, who heads Equality PA, a statewide LGBT advocacy group.

In fact, Martin says, he recently spoke with a couple trying to decide whether to

live permanently in Maryland or Pennsylvania. “I said, ‘If you have a chance at getting state and federal benefits there, why would you come here?’” (Advising people not to come to his home state was “a difficult position to be in,” he adds.)

Local business leaders know the value of diversity. Highmark sponsors gay-pride events, while PNC Bank and K&L Gates rank among the country’s best places to work for LGBT employees. When the American Civil Liberties Union sued to overturn Pennsylvania’s marriage ban, the first plaintiff listed in the lawsuit was a human-resources executive at BNY-Mellon.

So far, though, businesses haven’t really put their mouths where their money is. While they may offer benefits to their own employees, they haven’t brought much pressure to bear on LGBT issues.

That “is something we’re working on,” Martin says. He notes that this spring, UPMC took an allbut-unprecedented step to publicly back House Bill 300, a proposed state law banning discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation.

Still, business leaders could be doing much more. According to the state’s lobbying disclosure database, $ 1.1 million has been spent lobbying officials on “civil justice” issues so far this year: By contrast, some $ 2.8 million has been spent over efforts to reduce penalties stemming from lawsuits.

Imagine if business leaders lobbied against marriage bans as intensely as they fight for tax breaks. Imagine if UPMC head Jeffrey Romoff and Highmark head William Winkenwerder, instead of spending money denouncing each other, aired ads on marriage equality instead. (“Our relationship is sanctioned by state law,” they could say. “Do you really think same-sex couples could do any worse?”) Imagine if the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette’s editorial page devoted as much ink to marriage equality as it has to privatizing liquor stores. It’s not like the new editorials could be less effective.

In any case, the Supreme Court’s decision means that banning same-sex marriage is no longer legalized discrimination.

It’s an unnecessary government regulation, one that puts Pennsylvania employers at a competitive disadvantage. And Harrisburg Republicans hate that stuff.

Don’t they?

IMAGINE IF BUSINESS LEADERS LOBBIED AGAINST MARRIAGE BANS AS INTENSELY AS THEY FIGHT FOR TAX BREAKS.

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Although Khalid Sheikh Mohammed (the alleged 9/11 mastermind) was waterboarded 183 times, among several extreme interrogation techniques, he and his CIA captors eventually reached a moderated state. In 2003, though still housed in a “black site” in Romania, “KSM” asked permission to design a household vacuum cleaner, and the highest echelons of the agency co-operated, according to a former senior CIA analyst, speaking to the Associated Press in July. In reality, when a detainee exhausts his intelligence value, the agency’s main mission is to keep him “sane,” in case he is later put on trial, and the vacuumcleaner project was thought likely to engage KSM, who, 15 years before the murders of nearly 3,000 people on Sept. 11, had earned a mechanical-engineering degree from North Carolina A&T State University.

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The gourmet-lollipop company Lollyphile announced its latest flavor in June: Breast Milk Lollipops (four for $10). Owner Jason Darling said it “slowly dawned on” him that his friends were “producing milk so delicious it could turn a screaming, furious child into a docile, contented one. I knew I had to capture that flavor.”

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Marketing Challenges: (1) The Rocket Fizz Soda Pop and Candy Shop franchisers, already with a lineup of sometimes-unappreciated flavors such as buffalo-chicken-wing soda, briefly experimented in June with “ranch dressing” soda, a mistaken adventure that co-founder Rob Powells jokingly blamed on his business partner. (2) Brewmaster John Maier, of Rogue Ales, in Newport, Ore., pointed outt that “wild

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yeasts” have been used in beer for centuries and thus (according to a June report on FoodBeast. com) his company’s Beard Beer (from yeast of beards, including at one time, his own) should be regarded as a traditional brew.

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It was a special occasion in Surrey, England, in June as a rare plant prepared to bloom. The 3-foot-tall Puya chilensis, native to Chile, features neon-bright greenishyellow flowers with blooms large enough to yield drinkable nectar, but its most startling distinction is its ability to nourish itself by trapping small animals in its razor-sharp spines, leaving them to decay. (At Britain’s Wisley Garden, it is fed with ordinary fertilizer rather than animals.)

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During a June debate in a House Rules Committee hearing on abortion legislation, U.S. Rep. Michael Burgess of Texas, himself an obstetrician/gynecologist, criticized a proposal to outlaw abortion at the 20-week limit (where a fetus is said to begin to feel pain), insisting on an earlier ban, at 15 or 16 weeks.

“Watch a sonogram of a 15-week-old baby,” said Burgess, “and they have movements that are purposeful. … If they’re a male baby, they may have their hand between their legs.” Thus, “If they feel pleasure, why is it so hard to think that they could feel pain?”

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Physicians at Kwong Wah Hospital and Queen Elizabeth Hospital, publishing in the Hong Kong Medical Journall recently, described a 66-year-old man seeking relief from a swelling in his abdomen (after having had a sparse history with doctors). They concluded

that the man was basically a woman and that the cause of the swelling was an ovarian cyst.

The patient had both Turner syndrome, which causes women to lack some female features, and congenital adrenal hyperplasia, which boosts male hormones. (While females have two X chromosomes, and males an X and a Y, Turner syndrome patients have one X and no Y.)

school lunches, earned-income tax credits, etc.), allegedly because the company’s wages and benefits are so meager. The report, an update on 2004 numbers that were less than half those found this time around, estimated that Walmart families accounted for more than 9,000 Wisconsin Medicaid enrollees.

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Melanie Typaldos, 57, and her husband, Richard Loveman, 54, in Buda, Texas, are supposedly part of a growing trend of people keeping pet capybaras (giant, semi-aquatic guinea pigs that are the world’s largest rodents, at more than 100 pounds). “Gary” sometimes lounges on the couple’s marital bed and frolics in the above-ground pool the couple installed for him. Although Melanie and Richard keep other, more traditional, animals at their home (they told London’s Daily Mail in June), Gary is the only one as large as a human but with the distinctive body and head of a rat.

Alarming Headlines: (1) “Koala Chlamydia: The STD Threatening an Australian Icon” (BBC News). (2) “Super-Sized Crabs and Oysters With Herpes” (Field & Stream). (3) “Far-Right Extremists Chased Through London by Women Dressed as Badgers” (International Business Times, reporting June rallies of two British nationalist parties and their opposition, occurring at the same time and place as a demonstration against the government’s cull on badgers).

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In June, Barbour County, W.Va., firefighters, called to a farm in Belington, rescued the horse “Rowdy,” whose entire body was somehow trapped inside an industrial-sized tire. Rowdy’s owner said she believes Rowdy had an altercation with some of the other horses.

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A staff report by Democrats on the U.S. House Committee on Education and the Workforce released in June, and using data from Wisconsin (because of the state’s comprehensive record-keeping), found that taxpayers wind up paying out at least $75 million a year in “safety net” assistance to the state’s Walmart workers (food stamps, Medicaid,

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Least Competent People: (1) Apprentice Brooklyn, N.Y., tree-trimmer David Fleischer, 21, had to be rescued by firefighters in July after he apparently violated the cardinal rule in the business by cutting lower branches first — until he was stranded at the top of the tree. “He is a good boy,” said “Izzy” Fleischer, “but he is learning.” (2) Emergency crews in Fort Worth, Texas, responded to a Quik Trip gas station in June when an unidentified man got his finger caught in his car’s gas cap after he poured in some additive. Rescuers had to use a hammer and screwdriver to break the plastic around the cap and finally freed the man’s hand, unscathed, after a 20-minute struggle.

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COFFEE MACHINE {BY ANDY MULKERIN} It’s not a huge secret that pinball is alive and well in Pittsburgh — the Professional and Amateur Pinball Association, after all, keeps its headquarters in Scott Township.

But Lawrenceville’s Kickback Pinball Cafe, which opened in May, is unique in that it combines a passion for pinball with a passion for java.

Twelve years ago, owner Maura Kline moved from Maryland to Pittsburgh for college, and ended up staying. Last year, she pursued a plan that allowed her to realize her dream of opening a coffee shop — and to get some of her husband’s pinball machines out of the garage.

“My husband, Joe, has always been really into pinball, and he had started collecting machines,” Kline explains. “One day it dawned on us: Why don’t we open a coffee shop that has pinball too?”

Kline’s husband, Joe Veltri, runs The Gallery 4, in Shadyside, and Kickback exhibits a commitment to aesthetics, too; the floor is painted like a huge pinball machine. A mezzanine level will soon be open, with additional machines to play.

Kickback offers light lunch fare — Kline says the smoked-salmon sandwich is particularly popular. And working with the roasters at Kiva Han, Kickback developed its own signature house blend.

You can come for the brew, but don’t be surprised if you end up sticking around for the play.

“Sometimes people come in just for coffee, and ended up being really interested in the pinball,” Kline says with a smile.

AMULKERIN@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

4326 Butler St., Lawrenceville. www.facebook.com/kickbackpgh

the

FEED

Mid-summer is when fresh herbs bs start growing beyond their borders, and the e perfect time to freeze some of the execess ecess for winter. Fill an ice-cube tray with finely chopped herbs (parsley, basil, cilantro, etc.). Gently add water. Freeze. When frozen, pop herb cubes into labeled freezer bags. Use a couple months from now in soups, sauces and other dishes.

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{BY ANGELIQUE BAMBERG + JASON ROTH}

N

TASTY TACOS

OW THAT Pittsburgh has, at last, a selection of top-notch tacos vended from sidewalk stands and trucks, is there still a place for the humble taqueria? Can a forthright, inexpensive menu centered on tortillas and fillings — devoid of gringo clichés, Mexican-American hybrids and high-profitmargin margaritas — cover the fixed costs of a storefront? On a well-traveled block of the South Side at the foot of the Birmingham Bridge, Bea’s Taqueria is giving it a go.

It’s a bare-bones operation. To say the interior is nondescript may be saying too much. One orders from a counter in the rear, sits on a stool at one of the tables in the front dining room to eat, then returns to the counter to pay. The kitchen is on view behind the counter, more by accident than design. But the large storefront

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

{PHOTOS BY HEATHER MULL}

windows offer a front-row seat to the parade of revelry on East Carson Street, and the food itself is something to celebrate.

Ten years ago, Bea’s offerings would have been groundbreaking in Pittsburgh.

Fifteen different fillings, all but one meat-

BEA’S TAQUERIA 2212 E. Carson St., South Side. 412-736-6779 HOURS: Mon.-Thur. 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Fri.-Sat. 11 a.m.-3 a.m.

PRICES: S$2.50-10 LIQUOR: BYOB

CP APPROVED based (can you even name fourteen different kinds of meat?) are available as tacos at $2.50 or $3 apiece, or in burritos at $7.50 or $9 apiece. Beyond this are tostadas (interestingly, available only with

Chorizo tostada

shredded beef or chicken), enchiladas and a couple of soups. The variety in fillings, not preparations, is the essence of the taqueria; Bea’s entire menu may fit on a postcard, but you could eat tacos till you burst and still only scratch the surface of the many Mexican delicacies on offer.

Despite the heat, we wanted to try the soups. The menu describes both pozole, the crimson pork and hominy stew, and a Salvadoran beef soup. Unfortunately, neither was available on our visit. The sole employee on duty, while perfectly competent, was not conversant in English (nor are we in Spanish), so we could not ascertain whether this was due to an anticipated avoidance of hot broth during a heat wave, or simply because the soup had run out. Instead, we endeavored to sample every filling they had.

Not all 15 of these were available, either,

but there were plenty to try: chicken and shredded chicken, roasted pork and al pastor, ground beef, shredded beef, lengua (tongue) and steak.

Shredded chicken lent savor to an exceptional quesadilla, thick with filling and perfectly crisped on the outside. The amount of flavor was far beyond what we normally expect from chicken unless it’s gussied up with accompaniments.

Bea’s fine shreds, red with the salsa in which they had been cooked, were well moistened, and the absence of any large chunks made it a pure flavor experience.

And so it continued with everything we tried. A burrito stuffed with saffron rice and cheese nonetheless starred savory steak, while tacos — served according to authentic tradition, in doubled corn tortillas that had been warmed on a griddle — were all tasty. Al pastor, pork cooked with pineapple and onion, had a slightly sweet tang that appealed even to Angelique, a pineapple skeptic. Lengua featured a fine dice of the rich, dense, yet tender tongue meat, well enhanced by creamy guacamole.

Perhaps best of all was shredded beef on a tostada, the ultra-crisp tortilla of which was deep fried while we watched.

The meat was robust and tender, the base layer of creamy refried beans served to anchor it to the tortilla “cracker” while adding its own earthy flavor, and a squirt of salsa verde from the condiment table brought notes of brightness that played especially well against a lush dollop of sour cream.

Bea’s food is so exceptional, we wouldn’t care if they never updated the furnishings or decor. The only thing that would have improved our experience was the presence of every item on the menu; at a place that gets tacos and tostadas so right, we like to think the pozole would also prove worthy. But for Bea’s to keep its kitchen fully stocked, we Mexicanfood lovers must do our part and keep the dining room stocked — with customers.

On the RoCKs

{BY HAL B. KLEIN}

FEATHER IN THE CAP

Pittsburgh bartenders go global It’s 2 a.m. at the Carousel Bar in New Orleans, and Will Groves (the bar manager at Butterjoint) and Jason Endress (bartender at Harvard and Highland) know they should turn in for the night. They’ve spent the day chopping and juicing fruit, shaping endless garnishes, and batching thousands of cocktails. Later in the evening — following a class taught by Jim Meehan, legendary bar owner and best-selling cocktail-book author — they’d visited a series of classic French Quarter bars.

But while they both have their alarms set for 6:30 a.m., they’re too engaged in conversation to go to bed.

“You work really hard, and then you play really hard. And then you wake up and work really hard again — despite having played really hard,” says Groves.

That’s the order of business at the Cocktail Apprentice Program, which he and Endress recently attended with Maggie Meskey (another H&H standout) at the Tales of the Cocktail convention in New Orleans.

There were about 70 participants — known as CAPS — in the program this year. The CAPS, an international group of up-and-coming bartenders, are the backbone of a convention that draws 20,000 bartenders, liquor companies and cocktail enthusiasts. And for Pittsburgh’s delegation, the camaraderie forged during long hours of teamwork (and equally long hours of celebration) is the big takeaway.

“I’ve taken away a big sense of humility of my very small role in a larger community,” says Endress. “You’re not too sure about it before you go in because bartenders have strong personalities, but you could feel it, electric, between the group of us.”

“This is about us helping each other find a vision for our future,” adds Meskey.

That future now includes being part of a global network of bartenders. Endress believes that broadening connections with drink-makers in other cities won’t just make him a better bartender: It’ll help the region continue to grow in vibrancy.

“Pittsburgh isn’t wilderness anymore,” he says. “We have a nation of bartenders that wants to support what we do.”

“I’VE TAKEN AWAY A BIG SENSE OF HUMILITY OF MY VERY SMALL ROLE IN A LARGER COMMUNITY.”

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Work yourself into a lather.

Rinse.

Repeat.

CHINA STAR. 100 McIntyre Square, 7900 McKnight Road, North Hills. 412-364-9933.

Though a standard ChineseAmerican menu available, the real action is on the humbly Xeroxed Sichuan menu that’s all in Chinese. Fortunately, there is a translated version available, and the names read like a gourmand’s exotic fantasy: duck with devil’s tongue yam, rabbits in flaming pan. These authentic dishes may sound mysterious, but they’re delicious. KE D’S SIX PAX & DOGZ. 1118 S. Braddock Ave., Regent Square.

412-241-4666. This established venue is known for its revered pub fries and the classic wiener with kraut (plus plenty of beer to wash it down). But don’t miss the pizza, with a top-notch crust. D’s continues to raise the preparation of salty, cheesy, fatty comfort food to an art. JE DOUBLE WIDE GRILL. 2339 E. Carson St., South Side (412-3901111) and 100 Adams Shoppes, Route 288, Mars (724-553-5212).

You may cringe at the “white trash” theme, or feel bemused at ordering sautéed shrimp and wood-grilled portabella on a faux TV-dinner tray. But there’s plenty of good vegan fare, beer and a fun filling-station-turnedrestaurant ambience. KE

Juniper Grill {PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL} sauce. But even a simpler dish, such as fettuccini Alfredo, is perfectly executed. LE

EDEN. 735 Copeland St., Shadyside. 412-802-7070. The food here is inspired by the raw-food movement, but it’s hardly dreary health food. The menu is simple, with a few options in each category: starter, main THE MINTT. 3033 Banksville (raw), main (hot) and sweet.

Road, Banksville. 412-306-1831.

Some dishes were frankly salads, This casual eatery successfully while others were raw, vegan taps the multicultural cuisines adaptations of cooked comfort of India’s eastern coast, foods. (Chicken can be added to with dishes such as gongura some dishes.) There is also chicken and mutton an extensive menu of biryani. Other regions freshly squeezed and are also represented blended juices and with dosas, curries smoothies. JF and tandoori specialties. For an www. per pa JUNIPER GRILL. 4000 appetizer, try Chicken pghcitym o .c Washington Road, 555, dressed with

FULL LIST E N O LIN

McMurray. 724-2607999. This sister restaurant to Atria’s chain cultivates an ambience of artfully casual insouciance. The preparations — many with Mexican or Asian influences — are appealingly straightforward, neither plain nor fussy: Pork loin with bourbon glaze; spicy flatbread loaded with shrimp, roasted red and poblano peppers, pineapple and cheese; and skirt steak drizzled in a creamy chipotle sauce. LE

{PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

D’s Six Pax & Dogz

ECHO. 1740 Route 228, Cranberry. 724-779-3246. The menu at this sophisticated restaurant offers a tour de force of modern American cuisine. It focuses on central ingredients and adds layers of flavor, sometimes in unexpected forms, such as a purée of tuna alongside grilled steak, or golden trout served on a bed of orzo with a fennel-cream

World charm, with just a touch of hipness bolstered by attentive service. The fare is Spanish cuisine, and there’s no mistaking the restaurant’s signature dish: paella, featuring a bright red lobster tail. In warm weather, enjoy the outdoor patio along lively Carson Street. KE

LEGENDS OF THE NORTH SHORE. 500 E. North Ave., North Side. 412-321-8000.

Despite its name, Legends is no sports bar: It’s a family-friendly restaurant with a local flavor.

The menu is almost exclusively Italian: Offerings include classics such as gnocchi Bolognese and penne in vodka sauce, and more distinctive specialties such as filet saltimbocca. KF MALLORCA. 2228 E. Carson St., South Side. 412-488-1818.

The ambience here is full of Old

peanuts, curry leaves and a traditional pickle. KF OISHII BENTO. 119 Oakland Ave., Oakland. 412-687-3335.

Bamboo walls and a low counter with colorful cloth cubes for seating denote a place for moderately priced Japanese food, including sushi.

Oishii also adds a few Korean dishes for variety and spice; those seeking a little heat might consider bulgogi, the Korean BBQ. JF SAUSALIDO. 4621 Liberty Ave., Bloomfield. 412-683-4575.

Casual elegance is the byword at this neighborhood venue, where the fare is inspired by Northern California cuisine, with seasonal ingredients combined into New American and Continental dishes. The preparations vary widely, from ultra-traditional offerings like crab-stuffed shrimp to au courant updates like duck with orange-apricot balsamic glaze. LF CONTINUES ON PG. 22

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DINING OUT, CONTINUED FROM PG. 20

offMenu

SAVOY. 2623 Penn Ave., Strip District. 412-281-0660. The Strip District now has a swanky spot for brunch and dinner.

The artfully prepared cuisine suggests a cross between current fine-dining culture (locally sourced foods, sous vide meats), lounge favorites (sliders and fish tacos) and Southern comfort (chicken with black-eyed peas and greens, watermelon salad). LE

{BY AMYJO BROWN}

A GOOD START

After one year, Lola quietly making its mark on local food scene UNLIKE OTHER area restaurants operating on its level,

SEWICKLEY HOTEL. 509 Beaver St., Sewickley. 412-7419457. At this revamped hotel, the offerings reflect a balance between time-honored dishes such as turtle soup and more modern fare, like a crabmeatstuffed quesadilla. Steak-lovers will be pleased, but adventurous burger fans should check out the Light Up Night burger, topped with blue crabmeat, bacon, avocado and pepperjack cheese. LE

Darcy Monteverde Dayton, Jennifer L. Enciso and Amy E. Peckk

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Principal Investigators – Dr. S. Berg, Dr. G. Rosenberg, Dr. L. Dobkin Do you have a medical condition that is not listed? Give us a call. Our studies change regularly and we may have a study that’s right for you.

Please call 412-363-1900 for more information.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

STATION STREET. 6290 Broad St., East Liberty. 412-365-2121.

A neighborhood hot-dog joint with exotically dressed dogs, including: chili cheese (with curds), Hawaii (pineapple and bacon), kimchi, sweetbreads and “devil� (egg salad, Tabasco and potato chips).

Also offers tacos. JF TABLE LAKESIDE BRICK OVEN AND BAR. 200 N. Lakeside Drive, Canonsburg.

724-746-1126. Perched on the edge of manmade lake, this clubby restaurant offers casual American cuisine, with outside dining in season. A brick oven produces a variety of “phatbreads� topped creatively, such as the “lawnboy,� with prosciutto, tomatoes and wilted arugula. Burgers, chops, seafood and pasta dishes round out the menu. KE THAI GOURMET. 4505 Liberty Ave., Bloomfield. 412-681-4373.

Located in a narrow former lunchroom, Thai Gourmet is the casual, no-nonsense and no-frills member of Pittsburgh’s Thai restaurant club. The prices are on the low end, but the food quality is high and the portions are huge. The decor mixes Asian themes with diner kitsch in a delightful way. JF

Lola Bistro’s Michael Barnhouse {PHOTO BY AMYJO BROWN}

Dayton Enciso, pc

SOBA/UMI. 5847-9 Ellsworth Ave., Shadyside. 412-3625656/412-362-6198. Here, the local Big Burrito group offers two different menus in the same building. Soba offers pan-Asian fusion (from Korean barbeque to Thai corn chowder and Vietnamese hot-and-sour shrimp) in a minimalist yet elegant restaurant/lounge.

Umi’s Japanese menu, meanwhile, focuses on sushi and teriyaki; it’s a perennial finalist in City Paper’s “Best of Pittsburgh� issue. LE

Lola Bistro, on the North Side, stays out of the limelight. Tucked away off North Avenue, in West Allegheny, the eatery will celebrate its ďŹ rst anniversary at the end of the month. “We’re just a touch off the beaten path,â€? says chef Michael Barnhouse. “But there is plenty of free parking.â€?

The low proďŹ le is OK by Barnhouse. “I kind of like the grassroots [idea of it], not really forcing myself on people,â€? he explains.

The small space — formerly a coffee shop — is run by Barnhouse, his wife, Yelena, and one fulltime employee.

The menu offers more than a dozen tantalizing options. Starters include: braised rabbit and bruschetta, latkes with housemade lox and their own charcuterie.

There’s also pelmeni — Siberian dumplings ďŹ lled with lamb and beef that are Yelena’s contribution to the starter menu. Made from her Russian family’s recipe, they replaced pierogis because “everyone has pierogis,â€? Yelena says.

She is also responsible for the desserts, including another favored recipe: the Russian honey cake.

When not contributing to the dishes, Yelena runs the front of the house, while Michael manages the food in back.

The food is sourced as locally as possible.

The entrees range from staples such as fettuccini carbonara and lamb Bolognese to surprises such as the Indonesian seitan curry and hand-shaven noodles and pork. “I try not to make things too fussy, have too many steps,� Michael says.

Barnhouse, who grew up in St. Clairsville, Ohio, previously worked on the West Coast, and was a former executive chef for Wolfgang Puck. Since then, he moved to Pittsburgh to be closer to family.

With an eye toward the North Side’s revitalization, he says he’s feeling good about the spot and his restaurant’s chances. “I like the idea of it evolving naturally,� he says.

A B OW N @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

1100 Galveston Ave., West Allegheny. 412-322-1106. www.lola-bistro.com

LOCAL

“WE HAD THE HIGHS AND LOWS OF OUR CAREER IN CHINA.”

BEAT

{BY NICK KEPPLER}

LOCAL VIDEOS, NO JOKE J Vega knows of a local band that was offered a plum gig: opening for The Wallflowers on their Pittsburgh tour date. The band was all set to play, when the manager of the Jakob Dylan-fronted group asked for one more thing: to see a video of them performing. They didn’t have one and, because of that, lost their spot.

Music-industry types are requesting videos more frequently, says Vega. “It’s not enough to have a decent-looking website and some tracks laid, down because digital editing makes it possible to sound good artificially,” says Vega.

He ought to know: He’s the owner and resident sound engineer of J Bird Studio, a recording studio he runs out of his Zelienople home.

And while Vega searches out developed bands and hones their pre-existing skills, rather than using studio tricks, bands still sometimes have to prove it. So Vega launched J Bird Studio Presents (www. thejbirdstudio.com/ videos), an online video series in which musicians play live in his sound room.

“The whole thing takes four hours and they have that requirement checked off,” Vega says.

The videos are raw, recorded with just an iPhone, but that’s the point; they demonstrate that the band can deliver the sonic goods with just some instruments and amps.

Vega was previously the sound man for a similar video showcase, Echo Chamber, for the Pittsburgh music blog Draw Us Lines, but a few key contributors to the site moved away and it made sense to move the endeavor under the J Bird roof (literally).

So far, the series has featured Broken Fences, Grand Piano, Household Stories, Nevada Color and Netizen. A future installment will feature The Dressed Frets.

The videos are produced at no charge to the band and are not dependent on them recording tracks at J Bird (for which there is a fee). Vega has thus far approached all the bands, though he says he is open to performers coming to him.

He warns that musicians have to be up to a certain standard to be featured. “There is a certain amount of quality control,” he says. “I don’t want 13-year-olds who rap calling me up wanting to do poop jokes.”

“IT’S NOT ENOUGH TO HAVE A DECENTLOOKING WEBSITE AND SOME TRACKS LAID DOWN.”

DR. POP PUNK ERIN}

Y MULK {BY AND

O

N THE ONE hand, Rishi Bahl is finishing his Ph.D. in business and communications, working on a dissertation that deals with phenomenology and pop music. On the other, he’s part of a pop-punk trio that’s been around since he and his bandmates were 18 — and that carries with it some of the baggage you might expect.

“I’m in a pop-punk band called The SpacePimps!” Bahl says with a laugh.

“What can you do? You have to own it.

But in a humble way. You can’t be surprised when someone says, ‘You’re in a band called The SpacePimps!’ Of course we are!”

That’s not to say he’d trade it for anything else. And he’s got a certain selfawareness to go along with the job. Take, for example, the fact that the Pittsburghbased trio’s new record is called Eternal Boy. It is, for the most part, not really intellectual stuff — more like songs about girls, and a bit of nostalgia, with names like “Katie” and “Party Foul.”

“Most of the time, pop punk equals immature and juvenile,” Bahl says.

“But we’ve sort of ascribed education as being really important.” He notes that his two bandmates are still working on their advanced schooling as well, one in chiropractic and one in education. “I think it intertwines — I think it allows us to do things smartly.”

THE SPACEPIMPS CD RELEASE

WITH DASH CITY SKYLINE, MACE BALLARD, RED HANDS, PATENT PENDING 7 p.m. Sat., Aug. 3. Altar Bar, 1620 Penn Ave., Strip District. $10-12.

412-206-9719 or www.thealtarbar.com

You might say they’re doing some things right: The SpacePimps — Bahl plays guitar and sings, with Joe Harbulak on bass and Jared Rosco on drums — recently returned from their second tour of China, something very few bands (even the ones that make it to Japan) can say they’ll ever do. The story goes that the band, which

came up in the local pop-punk scene playing shows with groups like Punchline, got a deal with Japanese label Kick Rock through the magic of Myspace in 2007, then were contacted by a Chinese label in 2011.

“We had the highs and lows of our career [in China],” Bahl explains. “We played in front of 20,000 people at a music festival, which might be the most people we ever play for. But we were dogging it, too. We don’t have a bus, so we’re flying domestically, we’re taking trains domestically, and the transit system — it’s China. It’s hightech, but it’s completely poverty-stricken in every sense. You can’t do a tour bus in China, because everything’s too far apart.”

That wasn’t the only novelty.

“We did a press conference there — backdrop and everything, microphones and everything. It makes no sense to us.

It’s hard to even describe without sounding like you’re lying about it.”

Back home, the band has its followers, but not quite the same level of attention.

To an extent, Bahl says, it’s strategic: The SpacePimps don’t play Pittsburgh every other week, because they’d prefer to

INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

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Owning it: The SpacePimps (from left: Jared Rosco, Rishi Bahl, Joe Harbulak)

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DR. POP PUNK, CONTINUED FROM PG. 23

play a few big shows a year. It’s part of that business sense Bahl brings with him from school.

“If I’m a person who’s going to come see a band, I’m not going to go see them if I know they’re going to play the next month,” he explains. “So we try to do three shows a year in Pittsburgh, and if we get support for a national, or a festival or whatever, we’ll do that. That’s completely intentional. From there, we branch out and try to do seven more markets.

“But Pittsburgh is always our home, and we always come back. When you come back and play for 300 to 500 people at home, it’s better than anything — it’s better than China.”

Back in the U.S.A., The SpacePimps release their own music and work largely in a DIY fashion. “I attribute Punchline’s work ethic with our entry into the scene,” Bahl says. “We copied them verbatim. They made it normal for you to have to headline your hometown and bring 400 people.”

ON THE RECORD

with Paul Hoffman of Greensky Bluegrass {BY ANDY MULKERIN}

{PHOTO COURTESY OF J. VAN BUHLER}

Greensky Bluegrass (Paul Hoffman, left)

WHEN YOU STARTED OUT, IT WAS THE EARLY ’00S, RIGHT AFTER O BROTHER, WHERE ART THOU AND ALL THAT. WAS THAT WHAT GOT YOU INTO BLUEGRASS? We were sort of already getting into it separately, and more in the Old and in the Way/David Grisman/Jerry Garcia camp. And we were all learning our instruments at the time — at that time it was very informal.

Eternal Boy is The Spacepimps’ fourth full-length. (There have been a few EPs and singles thrown in as well.) Some things might be a little different — “I used to write songs about girls,” Bahl says; “Now I write more about getting old.” But both the title and the classic, simple pop-punk tunes point to the band’s overall goals — moving forward, but not forgetting what made yesterday good.

“My favorite bands are the bands that didn’t abandon what they did before, but — I hate the word ‘maturing,’ but they’ve added new elements, they re-invent why you liked them to begin with,” says Bahl.

“That’s what we try to do. I’m never going to abandon pop punk, I think. I still listen to it every day of my life. I think that we hold it down, but — we added a string section on this new record, we added some synth parts. We try to add new elements, but I never want to abandon what might have made someone like us a year ago.”

AMU L K E R IN@PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

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I’VE HEARD YOU HAVE A HISTORY OF PLAYING A PLACE IN JOHNSTOWN CALLED DIVELY’S? Oh yes! We played at Dively’s a long time ago — and a couple times since then. The first tour we ever did outside Michigan included at stop at Dively’s, in 2005, in the fall. He would be one of those bar owners I called myself and booked myself. And we made some friends in Johnstown; those guys still come see us when we’re in Pittsburgh and Morgantown and close by.

IS THERE ANYTHING YOU MISS ABOUT THOSE SMALL BAR SHOWS? Some of those early, low-pressure shows where we were just defining ourselves were fun, in a different way. To get out there and play for a bunch of skeptics, it forced us to have fun in a different way: We had to be strong as a team. There was a very good chance that no one in the bar knew who we were.

A M UL K E RI N @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

GREENSKY BLUEGRASS plays the FLOOD CITY MUSIC FESTIVAL with TROMBONE SHORTY, ROBERT RANDOLPH & THE FAMILY BAND, STEPHEN KELLOGG & THE SIXERS, many more. Fri., Aug. 2-Sun., Aug. 4. Peoples Natural Gas Park, 90 Johns St., Johnstown. Single-day tickets $10-20; weekend passes $45-60. 814-539-1889 or www.floodcitymusic.com

LUNCHTIME

LIVE AT

SCHENLEY PLAZA

BROUGHT TO YOU BY 96.9 BOB FM, Q929, AND PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER

LIVE ACOUSTIC MUSIC NOON TO 1PM TUESDAY AUGUST 6

Mark Ferrari TUESDAY AUGUST 13

JD Eicher and the Good Nights Lunchtime hti Live i iis a FREE, acoustic ti concertt from Noon to 1 pm under the tent in Schenley Plaza. Grab your lunch to go and enjoy live music from local artists!

FOR MORE DETAILS:

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OPUS ONE PRESENTS

Tempted: Sneaky Mike

PARTY YOGI {BY ANDY MULKERIN} MICHAEL LUBBERT — he’s been known as

08/16 JOEY FATTZ'S 'BAZOOKA JOE'

OFFICIAL MIXTAPE RELEASE 09/10 NORTH MISSISSIPPI ALLSTARS 09/11 SAVAGES 09/14 GWAR & HATEBREED 08/02 ELECTROBELLY DANCE TROUPE

(EARLY)

DJS MR. STITCH AND ADAM OLIVERI CRY FIRE & BOULEVARD OF THE ALLIES (LATE) CELLFISH (LATE) BATAMBA (EARLY) THE SPRING STANDARDS (LATE) AN EVENING OF COMEDY FT. DAVON MAGWOOD (TWO SHOWS!) THE EASTERN SEA WITH

08/02 08/03 08/09 08/09 08/10 08/13

TICKETWEB.COM/OPUSONE | FACEBOOK.COM/OPUSONEPROD | TWITTER.COM/OPUSONEPROD FOR A COMPLETE LIST OF SHOWS VISIT WWW.OPUSONEPRODUCTIONS.COM

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

“Sneaky Mike” since he was a teenager — is in the midst of explaining his recent turn toward the spiritual, and how he balances his life as a yoga instructor with his longtime presence as a party rocker.

“Without sounding too head-up-inthe-clouds,” he says, “I’ve been experiencing so much synchronicity recently, so many serendipitous events —” He pauses abruptly.

“Sorry, some water just dripped on me from the ceiling.”

A surprise baptism for a guy whose new album is called The Last Temptation of Sneaky Mike.

“I decided to go with the Scorsese reference,” the onetime Hood Gang leader explains. “I’m really interested in Jesus — I mean, I’m not sure if there ever really was a real person who did all that. But I’m interested in it, and a lot of the ideas associated with him.

“Plus, a lot of people come up to me and say, ‘You look like Jesus!’”

Which is one more reason why the Catholic League might not be that keen on his crown-of-thorns-wearing visage on the cover of the new album. But it’s all part of the line Sneaky Mike walks: somewhere right where spirituality meets the party.

“Before I found yoga, [music] was my connection to higher realms,” Lubbert explains. “I would perform and there would be these moments where I would feel a real connection to something that I didn’t understand.”

After years of hosting famous and at times infamous parties at his Garfield home and performing with the Hood

Gang, in 2010, Lubbert moved briefly to New York, where he became a yoga instructor. (He had begun yoga after a cross-country trip with a girlfriend that ended in a break-up, leaving him struggling to find meaning.) After returning, he put out an EP, I Look Like Sneaky, early last year. Last Temptation is the followup, maintaining the silly party vibe, with Sneaky rapping over beats from local electronic producers.

But that doesn’t mean there’s no change going on here. Lubbert admits that he’s still not sure whether he plans to completely give up the “hedonistic” aspects of his lifestyle; he does, he says, plan to kill off the Sneaky Mike character ritually in the future after he starts a new band. (“People will still probably call me Sneaky Mike for a long time, though,” he admits.)

SNEAKY MIKE CD RELEASE

WITH GET WEIRD DJS 9 p.m. Fri., Aug. 2. Belvedere’s, 4016 Butler St., Lawrenceville. $5. 412-687-2555 or www.belvederesultradive.com

This Friday night, Lubbert celebrates the release of The Last Temptation of Sneaky Mike with a performance as part of the Get Weird dance party at Belvedere’s; he even has a track on the album named after the monthly event, hosted by DJs Cucitroa and Dizcrepnnc.

And while it might feel like just a party, keep in mind that it’s also part of Sneaky Mike’s philosophy.

“The music thing is a way to get people more interested in the rest of it,” Lubbert says. “It’s like one prong of an eightpronged attack.”

A M U L K E RI N @ P G HC I T Y PA P E R. C OM

CRITICS’ PICKS Wild Nothing

[POP PUNK] + THU., AUG. 01 Punk outfit The Lady and the Monsters doesn’t necessarily have that California sound, but maybe that’s because they’re actually from California, Pa. The five-piece officially releases its debut full-length on Sexy Baby Records (MxPx, The Queers, Two Man Advantage) tonight at the 31st Street Pub. The new record features some production help from Mass Giorgini, and it fits more with that old-school take on poppy punk than the stuff that took over post-Fall Out Boy. The group heads out on tour after tonight’s show, which also features Porno Tongue and Latecomer. Andy Mulkerin 9 p.m. 3101 Penn Ave., Strip District. $5. 412-391-8334 or www.31stpub.com

[PSYCH ROCK] + FRI., AUG. 02 Hailing from Athens, Ohio, psychedelic, jazzy, progressive-rock band Hundos headlines a collection of eclectic performances tonight at the 31st Street Pub. Working mostly with bass loops and groovy drum sounds, Hundos seeks to create an ambient yet upbeat atmosphere. The show starts with an odd assortment of openers from local acts Dazzletine, The Joyful Drags and Action Camp.

Kira Scammell 9 p.m. 3101 Penn Ave., Strip District. $5. 412-391-8334 or www.31stpub.com

and this year co-starring A$AP Rocky. The tour — which also rolls together artists like B.o.B., Trinidad James and Pittsburgh-born Chevy Woods — is sure to pack the fans in at the big amphitheater. Was a time when Wiz played smaller joints around here, but seeing him in a small room now? That’s just a pipe dream.

AM 6 p.m. 665 Rt. 18, Burgettstown. $33-85.50.

724-947-7400 or www.livenation.com

[INDIE ROCK] + MON., AUG. 05 What’s summer without a solid schedule of indie shows? Wild Nothing satiates the craving for shoegazey pop tonight at Altar Bar. With the Virginia band paired with local opener I Am a Sea Creature, who focuses on distortion-laid rock tunes, and a band fresh from the garage called The Neffs, the show is sure to delight a variety of tastes among indie-lovers. KS 8 p.m. 1620 Penn Ave., Strip District. $12-14. All ages. 412-263-2877 or www.thealtarbar.com

A$AP Rocky and Wiz Khalifa

[HIP HOP] + SAT., AUG. 03 Take a seat in the grass at First Niagara Pavilion tonight and enjoy the Under the Influence of Music Tour, the nowannual event headlined by local hero Wiz Khalifa,

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TO SUBMIT A LISTING: HTTP://HAPPENINGS.PGHCITYPAPER.COM

412.316.3388 (FAX) + 412.316.3342 X194 (PHONE)

{ALL LISTINGS MUST BE SUBMITTED BY 9 A.M. FRIDAY PRIOR TO PUBLICATION}

ROCK/POP THU 01 CIOPPINO SEAFOOD CHOPHOUSE BAR. Terrance Vaughn Trio. Strip District.

412-281-6593.

CLUB CAFE. Joe Firstman, Douglas Lowell Blevins, Modern Nature.

South Side. 412-431-4950.

CRANBERRY COMMUNITY PARK. Finally Free. Cranberry.

724-776-4806.

MALL AT ROBINSON. Fifth Harmony. Robinson. 412-788-0816.

THE MR. ROBOTO PROJECT. Eets Feats, Reptilian Shapeshifters, Triangle & Rhino, Red Ginger. Bloomfield.

PALACE THEATRE. Jody Perigo & Josh Verbanets. Greensburg.

724-836-1123.

SOLDIERS & SAILORS MEMORIAL HALL. Mindless Behavior. Oakland. 412-621-4253.

FRI 02 31ST STREET PUB. Hundos, Dazzletine, The Joyful Drags, Action Camp. Strip District.

614-266-8757.

BELVEDERE’S. Get Weird Beach Party w/ Sneaky Mike, Cucitroa, Dizcrepnnc. Sneaky Mike album release. Lawrenceville.

412-687-2555.

CARNEGIE LIBRARY OF HOMESTEAD MUSIC HALL. Justin Hayward. Munhall.

412-368-5225.

CIOPPINO SEAFOOD CHOPHOUSE BAR. Geen Stovall Trio. Strip District. 412-281-6593.

CLUB CAFE. Cry Fire, Boulevard of the Allies, Amanda Noah (Late).

South Side. 412-431-4950.

CLUB COLONY. Five Guys Named Moe. Scott. 412-668-0903.

CRANBERRY TOWNSHIP MUNICIPAL CENTER. Charlie Stayduhar. Frank Sinatra Tribute.

Cranberry. 724-776-4806.

FRICK ART & HISTORICAL CENTER. Matrimony. Point Breeze.

412-371-0600.

HOWLERS COYOTE CAFE. Bastard Bearded Irishmen, The Tradesmen. Bloomfield.

412-682-0320.

LATITUDE 40. Walk Of Shame Band. North Fayette.

412-693-5555.

LEMONT. Groove Doctors.

Mt. Washington. 412-431-3100.

LINDEN GROVE. Nightlife.

Castle Shannon. 412-882-8687.

LOWER BURRELL MOOSE LODGE 53. Dave Iglar Band. Lower Burrell. 724-355-4131.

OBEY HOUSE. King’s Ransom.

Crafton. 412-922-3883.

28

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

THUNDERBIRD CAFE. Old E Allstars. Lawrenceville.

412-682-0177.

W. NEW CASTLE ST. PLAZA. Highway 4. Butler. 724-256-5769.

THE WOODEN NICKEL. Judy Figel. Monroeville.

412-372-9705.

SAT 03 ALTAR BAR. The Spacepimps.

Strip District. 412-263-2877.

BARNEY’S BAR & GRILLE. Daniels & McClain. Aliquippa.

724-375-9851.

BRUSTER’S REAL ICE CREAM. Griffin Donley, Raven Clifton, Geoff Bland. Ross. 412-366-9899.

CIP’S. Gary Prisby. Dormont.

412-668-2335.

CLUB CAFE. Bill Deasy. Club Cafe Pop-Up Dinner. Cellfish, Chris Hannigan (Late). South Side.

412-431-4950.

EXCUSES BAR & GRILL. Bill Toms.

South Side. 412-431-4090.

THE FALLOUT SHELTER. One Pretty Minute, Until We Have Faces, Black Suit Youth.

Aliquippa. 724-375-5080.

HAMBONE’S. Money N’At. Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318.

HARVEY WILNER’S. Silkwood Shower. West Mifflin.

412-466-1331.

HOWLERS COYOTE CAFE. Supernachmittag, Awful Waffles, Brazilain Wax. Bloomfield.

412-682-0320.

ROCKY’S BBQ. Aces Full.

Sutersville.

THUNDERBIRD CAFE. The Wreckids. Lawrenceville.

412-682-0177.

THE WOODEN NICKEL. Bryan Cole. Monroeville. 412-372-9705.

SUN 04 BOCKTOWN BEER & GRILL. Jack Grace Band. North Fayette.

412-788-2333.

CARNEGIE LIBRARY OF HOMESTEAD MUSIC HALL. Yes. Munhall. 412-368-5225.

GARFIELD ARTWORKS. Frankie Teardrop, Britches, Satyr/Elfheim.

Garfield. 412-361-2262.

MON 05 CARNEGIE LIBRARY OF HOMESTEAD MUSIC HALL. Yes. Munhall. 412-368-5225.

GARFIELD ARTWORKS. The Walking Tree, Daniel Amedee,

MP 3 MONDAY SHAKY SHRINES

Each week, we bring you a new MP3 from a local band. This week’s offering comes from Shaky Shrines; download “Corner Store” for free on our music blog, FFW>>, at pghcitypaper.com.

Justin & Austin Nixon, Mike Synowiec. Garfield. 412-361-2262.

KENNEDY PARK. KardaZ. Sharpsburg. 412-781-0546.

PARK HOUSE. Pine Barons, The Districts. North Side.

412-224-2273.

TUE 06 FIRST NIAGARA PAVILION. Maroon 5, Kelly Clarkson, Rozzi Crane.

Burgettstown. 724-947-7400.

FRANKIE’S. The House Band.

Squirrel Hill. 412-422-5027.

HARD ROCK CAFE. The Aristocrats. Station Square.

412-481-7625.

THUNDERBIRD CAFE. Space Exchange Series feat.

David Throckmorton.

Lawrenceville.

412-682-0177.

WED 07

MC , Thermos. Lawrenceville.

412-687-2555.

CAPRI PIZZA AND BAR. Saturday Night Meltdown. Top 40, Hip Hop, Club, R&B, Funk & Soul.

East Liberty. 412-362-1250.

CATTIVO. Illusions. w/ Funerals & Arvin Clay. Lawrenceville.

412-687-2157.

DIESEL. DJ CK. South Side.

412-431-8800.

THE NEW AMSTERDAM. Tom Cox, Jwan Allen, Preslav.

Lawrenceville. 412-904-2915.

ROWDY BUCK. Top 40 Dance.

South Side. 412-431-2825.

S BAR. Pete Butta. South Side.

412-481-7227.

SUN 04 SMILING MOOSE. The Upstage Nation. DJ EzLou & N8theSk8. Electro, post punk, industrial, new wave, alternative dance. South Side. paper pghcitym 412-431-4668. .co

FULL LIST E ONwLwIN w.

BUHL COMMUNITY PARK. The Josh & Gab Show. North Side.

412-322-5058.

GARFIELD ARTWORKS. GDP, Lazy JP, Radium Girls, Joey Smooth, Stillborn Identity. Garfield.

412-361-2262.

HOWLERS COYOTE CAFE. The Mallet Brothers Band, The Wheals.

Bloomfield. 412-682-0320.

KENNEDY PARK. Daniels & McClain. Sharpsburg.

412-781-0546.

OLD TRAILS. Silkwood Shower.

Washington. 724-225-0484.

STAGE AE. The Black Crowes, Tedeschi Trucks Band, The London Souls. North Side.

DJS THU 01 BELVEDERE’S. Neon w/ DJ hatesyou. 80s Night.

Lawrenceville. 412-687-2555.

CLUB TABOO. DJ Matt & Gangsta Shak. Homewood. 412-969-0260.

PARK HOUSE. Jx4. North Side.

412-224-2273.

REX THEATER. Bonobo. South Side. 412-381-6811.

FRI 02 BACKSTAGE BAR AT THEATRE SQUARE. Salsa Fridays. DJ Jeff Shirey, DJ Carlton, DJ Paul Mitchell.

Downtown. 412-456-6666.

BELVEDERE’S. Get Weird Beach Party w/ Sneaky Mike, Cucitroa, Dizcrepnnc. Sneaky Mike album release. Lawrenceville.

412-687-2555.

LAVA LOUNGE. 80’s New Wave Flashback. w/ DJ Electric. South Side. 412-431-5282.

THE NEW AMSTERDAM. Good Vibes Coalition. Lawrenceville.

412-904-2915.

ONE 10 LOUNGE. DJ Goodnight, DJ Rojo. Downtown.

412-874-4582.

ROWDY BUCK. Top 40 Dance.

South Side. 412-431-2825.

RUGGER’S PUB. 80s Night w/ DJ Connor. South Side. 412-381-1330.

SAT 03 BELVEDERE’S. 90z Dance w/ Sean

WED 07 BLOOMFIELD BRIDGE TAVERN. Fuzz! Drum & bass weekly.

Bloomfield. 412-682-8611.

THE HANDLE BAR & GRILLE. DJ John. Twist & Shout Entertainment.

Canonsburg. 724-746-4227.

THE NEW AMSTERDAM. Brotha Mike & DJ Skooze. Lawrenceville.

412-904-2915.

SPOON. Spoon Fed. Hump day chill. House music. aDesusParty.

East Liberty. 412-362-6001.

HIP HOP/R&B

SUN 04 BROOKLINE PUB. Yoho’s Yinzide Out. Brookline. 412-531-0899.

THE R BAR. Yoho’s Yinzide Out. Dormont. 412-942-8842.

JAZZ THU 01 CJ’S. Rodger Humphries & The RH Factor. Strip District. 412-642-2377.

LITTLE E’S. Jessica Lee & Friends.

Entrepreneurial Thursdays.

Downtown. 412-392-2217.

PAPA J’S RISTORANTE. Jimmy Z & Friends. Carnegie. 412-429-7272.

SHADY SIDE ACADEMY JUNIOR SCHOOL. The Calvin Stemley Jazz Quartet. Point Breeze.

412-473-4400.

BONNIE & CLYDE’S. RML Jazz.

Wexford. 412-370-9621.

JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & SPEAKEASY. Roger Humphries & the RH Factor. North Side.

412-904-3335.

LA CASA NARCISI. Erin Burkett & Virgil Walters. Gibsonia.

724-444-4744.

LITTLE E’S. Ken Karsh Trio.

Downtown. 412-392-2217.

MOST-WANTED FINE ART GALLERY. Stranger Convention.

Garfield. 412-328-4737.

ST. CLAIR PARK. Snarky Puppy.

Greensburg. 724-838-4324.

SAT 03 CIOPPINO SEAFOOD HOPHOUSE BAR. Moorehouse Jazz. Strip District. 412-281-6593.

CJ’S. The Tony Campbell Saturday Jazz Jam Session. Strip District.

412-642-2377.

CLUB COLONY. Take Two. Scott.

412-668-0903.

FRESCO’S RUSTIC EUROPEAN CUISINE & WINE BAR. Skala & Cunninmundo. Wexford.

724-935-7550.

JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & SPEAKEASY. Mark Strickland Quartet. North Side. 412-904-3335.

LITTLE E’S. The Bonidie Jazz Guitar Trio. Downtown. 412-392-2217.

RIVERVIEW PARK. Kevin Howard.

Stars at Riverview Jazz Series.

North Side. 412-255-2493.

SUPPER CLUB RESTAURANT. Erin Burkett & Virgil Walters.

Greensburg. 724-850-7245.

TAMBELLINI BRIDGEVILLE RESTAURANT. RML Jazz.

Bridgeville. 412-370-9621.

BLUES THU 01 MOUNT LEBANON PUBLIC LIBRARY. Olga Watkins Band.

Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912.

FRI 02 FRESCO’S RUSTIC EUROPEAN CUISINE & WINE BAR. Billy Price.

Wexford. 724-935-7550.

JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & SPEAKEASY. Rich Harper Blues Band. North Side. 412-904-3335.

PENN BREWERY. The Blues Orphans. North Side. 412-237-9400.

STARLITE LOUNGE. The Night Tones. Blawnox. 412-828-9842.

SAT 03 LA CASA NARCISI. Sweaty Betty.

Gibsonia. 724-444-4744.

MONONGAHELA AQUATORIUM. Billy Price, Shot O’ Soul.

Monongahela.

PIZZA DADDIES. Sweaty Betty.

Gibsonia. 724-443-0066.

iighhbborrhhoods

Ne t iic N Histor TOUR #1 H Neighborhoods $25 ge rita He #2 UR TO a P ittsBUR GH ER ” “A rriv e a V isito r; De par t

For up to 4 people.

Cannot be combined with other discounts.

Expires October 31, 2013

$

25

STATION SQUARE NTOWN HOTELS AND PICKUPS FROM 6 DOW 42-2349 L -3 CAL 00 NS 1-8 RESERVATIO

THE CHARLIE DANIELS BAND

From award-winning gospel albums to genre-defining Southern rock anthems and CMA Award-winning country hits, the CDB is known for such hits as Long Haired Country Boy, In America, The Legend of Wooley Swamp and signature song The Devil Went Down To Georgia!

FRI 02

FIRST NIAGARA PAVILION. Wiz Khalifa, A$AP Rocky, B.o.B., Trinidad Jame$, more.

Burgettstown. 724-947-7400.

ALTAR BAR. Huey Mack. Strip District. 412-263-2877.

LINCOLN PARK PERFORMING ARTS CENTER. House of Soul.

Midland. 724-576-4644.

20% DISCOUNT

WED 07

SAT 03

SUN 04

h” urg e “OLLB SONeeLENth S UR ZNER TR EY TO

PRESENT THIS AD FOR A

THE R BAR. Ms. Freddye.

Dormont. 412-942-0882.

FRIDAY · AUGUST 16 · 8PM Pit $75; Orchestra $60, $50; Loge $60; Balcony $40, $30

ow Folls!

U

The Palace Theatre 724-836-8000

PalacePA

www.thepalacetheatre.org FREE PARKING FOR EVENING & WEEKEND SHOWS!

$ .50

2

MILLER LITE BOTTLES

FRIDAYS 9PM-11PM $

10 MILLER LITE BUCKETS ON SATURDAYS

South Side

SUN 04 HIGHLAND PARK. Kenia. Highland Ave. & Reservoir Dr. Highland Park.

JAMES STREET GASTROPUB & SPEAKEASY. Skip Peck Trio.

North Side. 412-904-3335.

MANSIONS ON FIFTH. Doug Levine. Shadyside.

TUE 06 ANDYS. Jon Banuelos. Downtown.

412-773-8884.

PATIO SPECIAL! $

2 LITE ALUMINUM PINTS & 2 LEINE SUMMER SHANDY DRAFTS

the

Wooden Nickel

$

CONTINUES ON PG. 30

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CONCERTS, CONTINUED FROM PG. 29

LOCAL TWEETS

KATZ PLAZA. Max Leake.

Downtown. 412-456-6666.

Recent dispatches from the music Twittersphere

WED 07 ANDYS. Fairmont Guitar Summit.

Downtown. 412-773-8884.

ACOUSTIC

@DrawUsLines (Draw Us Lines)

THU 01

Karaoke idea: Memorize the words to a Weird Al version and sing that over the backing track.

BILLY’S ROADHOUSE BAR & GRILL. Mark Pipas. Wexford.

724-934-1177.

DOWNEY’S HOUSE. Mike & Frank of Lava Game. Robinson.

412-489-5631.

ELWOOD’S PUB. West Deer Bluegrass Review. Cheswick.

724-265-1181.

MULLIGAN’S SPORTS BAR & GRILLE. Acoustic Night. West Mifflin. 412-461-8000.

@MacMiller (Mac Miller)

I just want everything Ralph Lauren. Polo.

Polo. Polo. Polo. Polo.

Polo. Polo. #Polo

FRI 02 THE BEER MARKET. Gina Rendina Acoustic Duo. North Side.

412-322-2337.

BIDDLE’S ESCAPE. Jack McLaughlin. Regent Square.

412-999-9009.

ELWOOD’S PUB. Doc & Tina.

Cheswick. 724-265-1181.

FRIDAY FAITH CAFE. Emily Summers. Washington.

724-222-1563.

MULLANEY’S HARP & FIDDLE. Tim & John. Strip District.

412-642-6622.

SAINT ALEXIS PARISH. The Kardasz Brothers. St. Alexis Parish Festival. Wexford.

724-935-4343.

SAT 03 DOWNEY’S HOUSE. Blake & Dean. Robinson. 412-489-5631.

OLIVE OR TWIST. The Vagrants.

Downtown. 412-255-0525.

ST. ANDREW’S LUTHERAN CHURCH. Brian Peters, Ellen Gozion. Shadyside. 412-242-7769.

SUN 04 HAMBONE’S. Calliope East End Appalachian Jam. Lawrenceville.

412-681-4318.

MON 05 HAMBONE’S. Monday Night Whiskey Rebellion Bluegrass Jam. Lawrenceville.

412-681-4318.

HOWLERS COYOTE CAFE. Monday Night Whiskey Rebellion Bluegrass Jam. Bloomfield.

412-682-0320.

WORLD

PARK. Dallas Marks. Monroeville.

412-856-1006.

SAT 03

CLASSICAL

PITTSBURGH PUBLIC MARKET. Vince Burns. Strip District.

412-281-4505.

WED 07 AVONWORTH COMMUNITY PARK. The Geese in the Bog. Ohio Township. 412-766-1700.

ALLEGHENY ELKS LODGE #339.

Pittsburgh Banjo Club. Wednesdays. North Side. 412-321-1834.

PARK HOUSE. Bluegrass Jam w/ The Shelf Life String Band. North Side. 412-224-2273.

ORGANIST DAN SANSONE. St. Paul Cathedral, Oakland.

412-621-6082.

OTHER MUSIC THU 01

FRI 02

CLUB COLONY. Mark Venneri.

Scott. 412-668-0903.

paper pghcitym .co

WED 07

SUN 04

REGGAE CLUB TABOO. DJ Rockatone Sound, Leviticus Sound.

Homewood.

412-969-0260.

BLUEBERRY HILL PARK. The Kardasz Brothers. Franklin Park.

MALL AT ROBINSON. The Weedrags. Robinson.

PAPA J’S RISTORANTE. Gene Stovall. Carnegie. 412-429-7272.

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

Father Yod sounds like Yeezus

FULL LIST E ONwLwIN w.

TUE 06

30

@marzettewatts (Edgar Um)

SUN 04

BAJA BAR AND GRILL. Ras Prophet. Fox Chapel.

412-963-0640.

COUNTRY THU 01 ELWOOD’S PUB. The Fiddlers.

Cheswick. 724-265-1181.

FRI 02

FRI 02 CITY THEATRE. Pittsburgh New Music Ensemble. South Side.

412-431-2489.

SAT 03 CITY THEATRE. Pittsburgh New Music Ensemble. South Side.

412-431-2489.

LEMONT. NiteStar.

Mt. Washington. 412-431-3100.

THE PITTSBURGH PROJECT. Urban Impact Singers. North Side.

412-321-3811 x 114.

ALTAR BAR. David Allan Coe. Strip District. 412-263-2877.

FIRST NIAGARA PAVILION. Blake Shelton, Eastern Corbin, Jana Kramer. Burgettstown.

724-947-7400.

MON 05

SUN 04

CLUB COLONY. Mark Venneri.

Scott. 412-668-0903.

MONROEVILLE COMMUNITY

HAMBONE’S. Cabaret. Jazz Standards & Showtunes singalong.

Lawrenceville. 412-681-4318.

WED 07

What to do

PAID ADVERTORIAL SPONSORED BY

IN PITTSBURGH

July 31 - August 6 FRIDAY 26 2

WEDNESDAY 31

livenation.com, ticketmaster. com or 800-745-3000. 6p.m.

Blake Shelton: Ten Times Crazier Tour

10 Years

ALTAR BAR Strip District.

412-263-2877. With special guests Cringe, Angelight & Shrouded in Neglect. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 7p.m.

Ronnie Dunn

FIRST NIAGARA PAVILION Burgettstown. Featuring Blake Shelton, Easton Corbin & Jana Kramer. Tickets: livenation.com, ticketmaster.com or 800-7453000. 7:30p.m.

Patrick Sweany CLUB CAFÉ South Side.

412-431-4950. With special guests Shane and Madi ( from The Midnight Special).

Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketweb. com/opusone. 8p.m.

THURSDAY 1 15

BESSEMER COURT Station Square. Featuring Jill West & Blues Attack. All ages show.

Free event. 6:30p.m.

SHERWOOD EVENT CENTER Wilkinsburg. Featuring music by Cello Fury, House of Soul & more. Tickets: grooveproductionsinc.com or 800-383-5760. 7p.m.

David Allan Coe ALTAR BAR Strip District.

412-263-2877. With special guests Terry Lee Spencer Band, Sourmash & The Shiners. Over 21 show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or

REX THEATER South Side.

412-381-6811. Over 17 show.

Tickets: greyareaprod.com.

7p.m.

ALTAR BAR Strip District.

412-263-2877. With special guests Patent Pending, Dash City Skyline & more. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 7p.m.

693-5555. All ages show. Tickets: latitude40pitt.com. 9:15p.m.

1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 8p.m.

Justin Hayward of The Moody Blues

CARNEGIE LIBRARY MUSIC HALL Munhall. 412-3685225. All ages show. Tickets: carnegieconcerts.com. 8p.m.

Walk of Shame Band

LATITUDE 40 Robinson. 412-

SATURDAY 3 37 Under the Influence of Music Tour FIRST NIAGARA PAVILION Burgettstown. Featuring Wiz Khalifa, ASAP Rocky, B.O.B. & more. Tickets:

Huey Mack | Devin Miles ALTAR BAR Strip District. 412263-2877. With special guests Kid Burghs & Kid Logik and Ze Martinez. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 7p.m.

MONDAY 59 Wild Nothing

ALTAR BAR Strip District. 412-

At the New Balance® store, our Fit Specialists will help you find the footwear that gives kids a fresh start on the school year. And as extra credit, you’ll get a free pair of matching kid’s sunglasses with any pair of shoes*.

TA S T E

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ALTAR BAR Strip District. 412263-2877. With special guests American Authors & Buried Beds. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 7:30p.m.

The Aristocrats HARD ROCK CAFÉ Station Square. 412-481-ROCK. With special guests Motometer & Theia Collides. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 8p.m.

WEXFORD

WATERFRONT 112 W. BRIDGE ST 412-464-1002

OAKLAND

3810 FORBES AVE 412-697-1333 newbalancepittsburgh.com

PITTSBU RG H’S L ARG EST SELECTI O N O F N EW BAL AN CE SH O ES I N SIZES AN D WI DTHS +

Honda Civic Tour

10616 PERRY HWY 724-940-2400

* Limited time offer while supplies last.

N E W S

TUESDAY 60

The Mowglis

SUNDAY 4 48

FRIDAY, AUGUST 2 ALTAR BAR

263-2877. With special guests I Am A Sea Creature & The Neffs. All ages show. Tickets: ticketfly.com or 1-877-4-FLY-TIX. 8p.m.

FIRST NIAGARA PAVILION Burgettstown. Featuring Maroon 5 & Kelly Clarkson.

Tickets: livenation.com, ticketmaster.com or 800-745-3000. 7:30p.m.

The Spacepimps

DAVID ALLAN COE

NORTH SHORE RIVERFRONT PARK North Side. For more information visit purplestride.org.

Bonobo

THE MEADOWS RACETRACK AND CASINO Washington. 724503-1200. Tickets: ticketmaster. com or 800-745-3000. 8p.m.

Summer Nights 2013

5K Timed Run & Walk to fight Pancreatic Cancer

Free Summer Concerts

newbalancepittsburgh.com

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THIS IS SOME EQUAL-OPPORTUNITY CRINGE

LESS ROCK, MORE TALK {BY AL HOFF} The presence of one of my favorite actors, Terence Stamp, in Unfinished Song caused me more pain than pleasure: Why is this talented man starring in this thin, feelgood gruel of sentimental clichés? And dammit, why is he doing nice quiet work as the crotchety pensioner, Arthur, who doesn’t know how to share his feelings?

GET ’ER

Happy at home: Vanessa Redgrave and Terence Stamp

Those buried feelings take a big hit when his perpetually cheery wife (Vanessa Redgrave) dies of cancer. To “honor her” (but mostly just to make this story work), Arthur takes his dead wife’s place in a choir of seniors, who sing rap and Motörhead under the perky direction of Gemma Arterton.

Why, yes, there is a big choir contest — and a solo that Arthur might sing, and an estranged son who might show up, and a big damp pile of Kleenex extracted from the audience through various shameless gimmicks. (As if to confirm all my worst fears about how terribly cheesy this film is, for its big emotional number — out of all the songs ever recorded — it chooses one

by Billy Joel.)

The domestic scenes with Stamp and Redgrave (also great) are the film’s best sweet and bittersweet moments. If only writer-director Paul Andrew Williams had focused on their relationship, and let these veteran actors work with material meatier than a Salt-N-Pepa song. Manor AHOFF@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

PERCY JACKSON: SEA OF MONSTERS. In this action fantasy adventure, adapted from Rick Riordan’s book, half-god Percy (Logan Lerman) and his pals venture through some treacherous waters, searching for the Golden Fleece. Thor Freudenthal directs. s t r Sta d., e W . 7. g Au

DONE

{BY AL HOFF}

I

N A SUMMER-MOVIE season dominated by men doing things while women stand by (if they are present at all), we finally get a film where a girl takes charge and does things. So many things that she’s gotta have a list!

Writer-director Maggie Carey’s debut feature, The To-Do List, is a coming-of-age comedy, set in 1993, tracking the sexual education of Brandy Klark (Aubrey Plaza).

Even as the high-achieving Brandy gives the valedictorian speech, she’s taunted for being a virgin. Convinced by her friends that being sexually experienced will better prepare her for college, the ever-organized Brandy lists sex acts in her TrapperKeeper, and makes checking them off her summer project.

She’s also lifeguarding at the pool, where she’s teased by her slacker boss (Bill Hader) and the hunky guy she has a crush on. In her off hours, she gets to learning with some of the local lads — from the nice guy (Johnny Simmons) who

Brandy (Aubrey Plaza) is ready for love ... or something.

adores her to some willing bystanders (Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Donald Glover, Andy Samberg).

The To-Do List earns its R rating with profanity, a steady stream of jokes about sex, bodily fluids and weirdly shaped sex organs, and one excruciatingly awkward sex scene after another. But however mor-

THE TO-DO LIST DIRECTED BY: Maggie Carey STARRING: Aubrey Plaza, Bill Hader, Johnny Simmons

tifying Brandy’s experiences are, she’s still a girl in charge of her own sexual awakening, even as it’s played for laughs. And it’s not like the guys depicted here come off any less awkward or embarrassing — this is some equal-opportunity cringe. Plaza finally takes a break from her moody, droney roles (like April on Parks and Recreation) and turns in a game, funny performance

as the smart-but-clueless Brandy.

Amid the jokes are some non-preachy messages, such as the importance of lube and condoms, and of parents and teens talking openly about sex. And even though this film’s comedic premise relies on the All-Consuming Sex Quest, Brandy considers this accomplishment just one of many things that define an adult. It’s also not just sex that Brandy learns about: As a control freak with a superiority complex, perhaps her greatest lesson is learning to loosen up, while acknowledging she has plenty to learn from others. The film also calls Brandy out for using men as study props, and the guys get some time to explain they also suffer from confusion and emotions.

The To-Do List is still a silly, crass comedy, but it’s in the canon of Better Teen Sex Comedies, like Fast Times at Ridgemont High or the first American Pie. And with its non-exploitative female perspective, it practically stands alone. You go, girl.

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1974 film. One thread follows Michael Corleone’s (Al Pacino) rise to power after the death of his father, Vito, while another thread flashes back to trace Vito’s (Robert DeNiro) journey to America and the start of his gangster career in New York’s Little Italy. Critics hailed Part II as a deeper film and a more insightful look at the corruption of the myths of family and the American Dream than its 1972 predecessor. 1:30 p.m.

Sat., Aug. 3, and 1:30 p.m. Sun., Aug. 4. Oaks (AH)

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NEW BEFORE MIDNIGHT. Traditionally, the “happy” resolution for romantic stories is marriage. But as Richard Linklater’s film posits, marriage is the hard part, and the earlier fallingin-love story is a lot more fun.

In Before Midnight, we catch up with Celine (Julie Delpy) and Jesse (Ethan Hawke), who met in Vienna in Before Sunrise (1995), and reunited nine later in Before Sunset. Now, another decade later, the pair are married (more or less), live in Paris and are raising twin daughters.

They’re on a fun Greek vacation, but there are undercurrents of tensions. “This is how people start breaking up,” Celine jokes (but not really) early on.

This film is broader than the previous twoperson affairs — there are a lively dinner with other couples who debate relationships, plus more scenery. But it all builds to Celine and Jesse alone in a hotel room having the kind of button-pushing argument that is an unwelcome result of familiarity. It’s ugly, but the concerns are real, if mundane: how to balance the self with the couple, while also juggling careers, families and life’s inevitable disappointments and frustrations.

Linklater’s film is still a bit gimmicky conceptually; some dialogue is too on the nose; and he’s still romanticizing sunny Europe.

The final reel is good work by the actors, but its passive-aggressive intensity isn’t exactly entertaining. Elucidating, sure, if you needed any reminder that movie’s happy endings are anything but. Starts Fri., Aug. 2. Harris (Al Hoff)

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THE SMURFS 2. The blue creatures are back, and teaming up with humans to find Smurfette, who has been kidnapped. Raja Gosnell directs this animated comedy. Starts Wed., July 31.

KING OF NEW YORK. Christopher Walken stars in this moody, violent tale of a gangster, recently released from prison, looking to settle scores.

Abel Ferrara directs this 1990 film. 7:30 p.m. Sat., Aug. 3. Parkway Theater, 644 Broadway Ave., McKees Rocks. $3

Before Midnight her situation as a jumping-off point to ruminate on the general slippery nature of “family history.” Starts Fri., Aug. 2. Manor (AH) 2 GUNS. Denzel Washington and Mark Wahlberg star in this mismatched-buddy-cop movie about a DEA agent and a Navy intelligence officer who team up to fight a drug cartel. Baltasar Kormákur directs this action comedy. Starts Fri., Aug. 2.

STORIES WE TELL. Canadian actress and filmmaker Sarah Polley (Away From Her) turns the camera on her own family in this examination of secrets, truth-seeking and the ripple effects of both. Polley grew up in a lively household in Toronto: Her mother was an actress, her dad a cheery man who enjoyed capturing the family on film. Some of these home movies form the backstory that Polley’s film unfolds: Things were not always sunny in the Polley home. Because Sarah was the youngest, much of her information — particularly about her mother, who died young — is secondhand, from her dad and her four older siblings. But when Polley starts pressing for the veracity of the accepted family narrative, she discovers a colossal untruth. It would be unfair to reveal it here, but it’s a whopper, and the second half of her docu-essay tracks the family re-ordering itself in light of the revelation. This is Polley’s intimate story, of course, but she’s wise enough to present

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era. 7:30 p.m. Fri., Aug. 2. Parkway Theater, 644 Broadway Ave., McKees Rocks. $3 AWESOME; I F*&#IN’ SHOT THAT. Fifty fans, each armed with a hi-def video camera, shoot what they want at a 2004 Beastie Boys concert. This 2006 doc is the result. 10 p.m. Fri., Aug. 2; 10 p.m. Sat., Aug. 3; and 7 p.m. Sun., Aug. 4. Hollywood

WE’RE THE MILLERS. A pot dealer, a stripper, a nerdy kid and a teenage runaway team up to pretend to be an all-American family in order to transport a huge quantity of weed across the Mexican border. Jason Sudekis and Jennifer Aniston star in Rawson Marshall Thurber’s comedy. Starts Wed., Aug. 7.

CINEMA IN THE PARK. The Hunger Games, Wed., July 31 (Schenley) and Sat., Aug. 3 (Riverview).

ParaNorman, Thu., Aug. 1 (Brookline); Fri., Aug. 2 (Arsenal); Sat. Aug. 3 (Grandview); and Sun., Aug. 4 (Schenley). Dr. Seuss’ The Lorax, Tue., Aug. 6 (West End/Elliott Overlook) and Thu., Aug. 8 (Brookline).

Lincoln, Wed., Aug. 7 (Schenley). Films begin at dusk.

412-422-6426 or www.citiparks.net. Free CITY LIGHTS. Charlie Chaplin’s 1931 feature is a self-described “comedy romance in pantomime” that finds The Tramp falling for a blind flower girl and setting about earning the funds for an operation to restore her sight; his turn as a prize-fighter is especially hilarious. A subplot about The Tramp’s friendship with a millionaire — who recognizes Charlie only when he’s drunk, and spurns him when sober — offers some sharp social commentary. This poignant, beautifully realized film, which even takes time to make fun of the talkies, is among Chaplin’s best. Through Thu., Aug. 1. Harris (Bill O’Driscoll)

THE STREET FIGHTER. Sonny Chiba stars in this 1974 martial-arts actioner about a mercenary fighter who runs afoul of some gangsters. Same old story, but you watch these old-school flicks for the fights, not the plot. Shigehiro Ozawa directs. 7:30 p.m. Wed., Aug. 7. Hollywood PRETTY IN PINK. Molly Ringwald, Andrew McCarthy and Jon Cryer star in this 1986 comedy-romance about a high school girl who must choose between the new cute rich guy and her goofy pal who has long been crushing on her. Howard Deutsch directs a script by John Hughes. 7:30 p.m. Wed., Aug. 7. AMC Waterfront

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Stories We Tell

THE PHILADELPHIA STORY. The witty words simply fly in this drawing-room comedy set amongst the wealthy of Philly’s Main Line. A socialite has left her first playboy husband behind and plans to remarry somebody more suitable, only to have her ex — and the tabloid press — turn up during the week of her wedding. George Cukor adapts Phillip Barry’s stage play, with the dream cast of Katharine Hepburn, Jimmy Stewart and Cary Grant. The 1940 film opens a month-long, Sunday-night series of films featuring directors working with their muses. 8 p.m.

Sun., Aug. 4. Regent Square

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Scarface RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK. In Steven Spielberg’s 1981 film, our square-jawed hero, archeologist Indiana Jones (Harrison Ford), tackles everything from giant boulders to snakes and conniving Nazis. 10 p.m.

Fri., Aug. 2, and 10 p.m. Sat., Aug. 3. Oaks

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THE GODFATHER, PART II. Francis Ford Coppola continues the saga of the Corleone family in this

SAVANNAH. Annette Haywood-Carter directs this period drama, set in the early 20th century and based on a true story about a man who rejects his birthright as a plantation owner and, instead, enjoys a life of freedom on the river, joined by a former slave. Jim Caviezel, Chiwetel Ejiofor and Sam Shepard star.

7:30 p.m. Thu., Aug. 8. Hollywood ANDY WARHOL FILMS. Selections from Warhol’s Factory Diaries series (1971-75) and other shorts screen. Ongoing. Free with museum admission. Andy Warhol Museum, North Side. www.warhol.org

++++ THIS SUMMER’S ‘LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE’.”

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-Claudia Puig,

LOW & CLEAR. In this new documentary from Kahlil Hudson and Tyler Hughen, two old friends try renewing their relationship through a fishing trip. But each has different approaches to fishing, as they do life. Before the screening, beginning at 6:30 p.m., a professional flycasting instructor will be giving demonstrations. 7:30 p.m. Thu., Aug. 1.

Hollywood FRANKENSTEIN’S ARMY. Richard Raaphorst directs this new horror film about a secret World War II project, in which Nazi doctors — armed with Dr. Frankenstein’s notebooks — stitch together new warriors from the parts of dead soldiers. 7 p.m.

Fri., Aug. 2; 7 p.m. Sat., Aug. 3; and 4 p.m. Sun., Aug. 4. Hollywood SCARFACE. Long before the Godfather or Tony Soprano, there was the original Scarface. Paul Muni stars in Howard Hawks’ searing tale of about one man’s violent pursuit of success during the Prohibition

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[ART REVIEW]

“THIS CORRIDOR HAS THE POTENTIAL TO BE ONE OF THE MOST SPECTACULAR STREETSCAPES IN THE CITY.”

REPURPOSED {BY ROBERT RACZKA}

INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

ADAM WELCH: TERMINAL MORAINE continues through Aug. 10. The Mine Factory, 201 N. Braddock Ave., Point Breeze. 412-370-6916 or www.facebook. com/TheMineFactory

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SAVING FAÇADES [ARCHITECTURE]

Adam Welch’s installation Terminal Moraine {PHOTO COURTESY OF THE ARTIST}

Adam Welch’s is the first solo exhibit in the recently opened The Mine Factory, a gallery located in a building housing artists’ studios across from the East End Food Co-op. The exhibit’s title, Terminal Moraine, describes the debris deposited at the end of a glacier; here, it refers to the finished and unfinished artworks created and accumulated by Welch during his decadeand-a-half-long journey as an artist.

Welch is primarily known in the art community as the curator at Pittsburgh Filmmakers/Pittsburgh Center for the Arts (where he was also Emerging Artist of the Year in 2008, before being appointed curator). This exhibit fuses the roles of artist and curator, using strategies of juxtaposition and combination to create a new gestalt. At a glance, the exhibit looks as if it could be a group show. It incorporates new, repurposed and reconfigured paintings, drawings, sculptures, projections and assemblages ranging from the abstract to the representational to the ready-made.

Together, they’re presented as a total work that’s akin to installation art.

There are materials and subjects that recur: diagrammatic imagery, buildingconstruction scraps, shelves filled with Welch’s signature Styrofoam book forms. But the overall effect is one of fragmentation. Semirandom clusters and conglomerations of artworks and other objects scatter our attention, rather than focus on an essential theme. Whatever it may be, this is not a conventional survey or retrospective; there’s not a chronology, title or date in sight. Rather, it’s a gallery-filling spectacle of impressive scale and scope — in effect, a labor-intensive arrangement that reuses Welch’s artworks, employing a freedom no curator would be permitted, except that here the artist is acting as curator of his own exhibit.

Experimentation is emphasized, and ambiguity abounds. Should we consider components as finished works, individually or together? Does piling one piece atop another constitute a new sculpture, or is it a fleeting juxtaposition? There is a consistent sensibility throughout, at once committed and casual. While larger themes, such as transformation or the uncertain nature of perception, are suggested, the installation is more evocative than communicative, open to interpretation without pointing in a specific direction. An artist’s talk at 6 p.m. on Aug. 8 should illuminate the artist’s process and intentions, followed by a closing reception from 7-9 p.m.

{BY CHARLES ROSENBLUM}

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{PHOTO BY HEATHER MULL}

On the (chopping) block: As Point Park expands, will these façades on Forbes Avenue, Downtown, be reconstructed?

N JULY 23, the City of Pittsburgh’s Planning Commission voted unamimously to give Point Park University permission to “deconstruct” buildings at 320, 322 and 330 Forbes Ave. These can now come down to make room for a project for a new Downtown theater complex for the Pittsburgh Playhouse on these and adjoining parcels, nestled tightly on the block bounded by Forbes and Fourth avenues and Wood and Smithfield streets. A crucial condition of the approval is that the ornamental terra cotta façade from the 320 Forbes building — the former Honus Wagner sporting-goods store — will be carefully saved and reconstructed elsewhere in the Playhouse project.

But did the planning commission have enough information to make a well-considered decision? Significant evidence suggests not.

The approval process has elicited varying opinions, from those who endorse the proposal as a practical necessity in a larger scheme to those who see it as a regrettable loss of historic structures. But the expected

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

easy separation between developers and preservationists has not taken shape as might be expected.

Rob Pfaffmann is an award-winning contemporary architect, probably best known regionally for his efforts to preserve the former Civic Arena. He argues that the buildings, or at least their façades, should

PLANS SHOW THAT POINT PARK WOULD REPLACE A PEDESTRIAN-SCALED STREETSCAPE WITH A LARGE BLANK WALL, WHICH WOULD NOT BE ACCEPTABLE. have been saved in place. “This corridor has the potential to be one of the most spectacular streetscapes in the city,” he says. During the debates about the redevelopment of Fifth and Forbes avenues during the Murphy mayoral administration, a published plan by UDA Architects included these façades among a larger group that were des-

ignated for preservation. “Why aren’t we pursuing that plan?” asks Pfaffman.

In an interview, planning commission member Page Thomas noted that while the three properties in question are National Register of Historic Places-eligible, they have not been nominated or approved, so there is no legal obstacle to removing them.

Meanwhile, at the July 23 hearing, no one actually spoke in favor of preservation, though two letter-writers did. Instead, Arthur Ziegler, president of Pittsburgh History & Landmarks Foundation, endorsed Point Park’s plan for the larger redevelopment, including removal of the façades and reuse of one.

His implication was that the university knows worthy buildings when it sees them.

“Point Park has more restored buildings than anyone else in Downtown,” Ziegler said. The school’s existing student center, which will connect to the new theater project, consists of substantive historical bank buildings by noted architects Frederick Osterling and Alden & Harlow. Indeed, part of the new project will be the renovation

of the Exchange Building, a distinctive Baroque Revival structure also by Charles M. Bartberger, which has much higher quality materials and design than the Forbes avenue structures.

When it comes to credibility in preservation issues, “I am comfortable with Arthur Ziegler,” said planning-commission member Todd Reidbord. And Ziegler, along with preservation architect Ellis Schmidlapp and the greater Point Park constituency, might yet prove correct that these façades can go.

Still, the question remains: What will Point Park’s new theater project actually be? While the university has presented its ground plans for the project, the work is still in early stages of design, so street elevations and perspective renderings, arguably requisite components of such a presentations, were not available. The planning commission’s Thomas commented, “We don’t see a vision for what it is to become. I don’t know what I’m saying yes to.”

Under such a condition, postponing the vote on demolition would have been more appropriate.

Thus far, for instance, plans show the replacement of a pedestrian-scaled streetscape by a large blank wall, which would not really be an acceptable solu-

tion in such an historic, pedestrian-scaled district. Architect Hal Hayes, a New Yorkbased theater specialist who also teaches at Carnegie Mellon, suggests that the Honus Wagner façade would make an outstanding entrance in its current location. “There are possibilities for changing things around that could make that usable.” Maybe a full streetscape of preserved façades is exactly what that long wall needs.

In fact, saving just the façade or part of the façade of an historic building is a widespread and common practice, though usually viewed as a distant second choice to saving an entire building. The preservation team should have gone into more detail as to why such a common technique is not possible or desirable here. A more detailed technical examination of these façades and what saving them would require was in order.

The irony is that, while Point Park will still submit a final land-development plan for approval of the Playhouse Theater project, the vote to allow demolition of the Forbes avenue façades is final.

Pfaffmann claims that a preservation group or individual could stop demolition by nominating the process for historic designation. But no such plan has yet been announced.

one another on a first date that turns into an emotional referendum on war.

[BOOK REVIEW]

CHARACTERS

He’d been the soldier, and his soldiering had to mean something. You could see

{BY FRED SHAW}

Years ago, when a guest speaker exhorted my MFA class to use family and friends as unique characters in our writing, I was intrigued. So when the speaker in Judith R. Robinson’s poem “Child’s Play” asks, “Where is Billy Applebee, our tormentor?”

— I want to know more. Robinson’s new collection, orange fire (Main Street Rag), does its narrative best to divine the artistic and emotional importance of those who’ve populated her speaker’s life.

Pittsburgh-based Robinson’s most effective work in the book’s 92 pages captures the poetic reality of situations and relationships. Her speaker observes with precise clarity in poems like “At Lanigan’s” and “Hawaiian Night,” witnessing the rites of funerals and singles parties. The description of food in “Dream Lunch” is spot-on and mouth-watering.

Robinson’s speaker is at her strongest when not just observing but including herself in the moment. That’s best exemplified by “Dinner Date,” in which the speaker and a military vet get to know

how much in those tight lips and his fist squeezing the wine-glass stem, hard.

So I gave him that.

Then I told him Danny never came home.

It ends with a crescendo, smug and succinct as a dagger: “It was finally for nothing, I whispered, evilly. / Nothing. Your service, his death. Nothing. / He quit arguing. Shut up. / I felt queasy, like I stepped on something / and made it stop moving.”

Still, powerful moments like these, laid bare and without tongue-holding, are rare in orange fire. Robinson’s tempered tone relies more on imagery than attitude.

Robinson combines the personal and the pastoral often, with uneven results. A favorite, “Tulips,” reminisces about a beloved aunt to contrast blooming perennials and urban decay: “Tulips remind me / of Aunt Lil / who planted them / to relieve the terror / of that crumbling brick duplex / next door to the gas station / where she lived / her long narrow life.” The musicality of the line breaks shows good craft, along with a keen eye.

While Robinson sometimes substitutes lessthan-taut metaphors for greater narrative focus, there’s much in orange fire to keep readers busy pondering their own personal and familial ties.

INFO@PGHCITYPAPER.COM

I NF O @PGH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

final weeks! hillman hall of minerals and gems

Experience the mastery of jewelry artist Paula Crevoshay. This exhibition of one-of-a-kind jewelry showcases designs created from precious raw materials, and celebrates the beauty and wonder of the animal, plant, and mineral kingdoms.

Sponsored by

carnegiemnh.org | 412.622.3131 members visit free one of the four carnegie museums of pittsburgh

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[PERFORMANCE]

SPACE INVADER {BY OLIVIA LAMMEL}

Laura Warman behind the wheel {PHOTO BY JOHN COLOMBO}

“HELLO, YOUR JITNEY has arrived,” Laura A. Warman says by phone from the driver’s seat of her 2007 Honda Fit, parked outside Downtown’s Omni William Penn Hotel. It’s 10:30 on a Wednesday night, and the local artist awaits her next passenger. He needs to stop in Bloomfield before heading to Shadyside, but this ride isn’t entirely about the destination.

While Warman silently drives, her collaborator, James Mueller, sits with the passenger in the back seat to create “an experience.” Mueller reads some poems, leads some word-association exercises and asks some conversation-sparking questions. In between, he challenges the amenable passenger to games of rock, paper, scissors. Afterward, Mueller says that his goal was to engage the rider in “an unusual but genuine way.”

The jitney idea formed when Warman’s car was broken. When the car was finally fixed, she “just wanted to drive people everywhere.” Most of her friends lack cars, and don’t feel safe walking. “It’s important for women

WHAT A GREAT RACK! Help decide which bike racks designed by local artists will appear in the Cultural District streets.

To Vote: Visit the Bike Rack Contest link under the Promo Tab on pghcitypaper.com One voter will win a bike-themed prize pack including admission tickets to Carnegie Science Centers BIKES: Science on Two Wheels Exhibit

Voting Ends: August 7, 2013 36

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

to feel safe going to the bar at night,�

Warman says. However, since she started the jitney service in May, two-thirds of her passengers have been men. She’s not sure why.

Warman initially averaged two rides a week. But word spread, and now she does four or ďŹ ve. She advertises with posts on Craigslist, Facebook and local online forum Never Tell Me the Odds. Warman doesn’t charge for the jitney service, but accepts donations that she splits with her collaborators.

Inside Warman’s cerulean cab, a soft navy fabric decorates the back seat, where two gossip magazines lie, both with Kim Kardashian on the cover. A platinum blonde weave is fastened festively to the back of the front seats.

“I WANTED TO FORCE MYSELF INTO PEOPLE’S HOUSES.�

A few days after the William Penn fare, Warman invited musician Ken Kaminski along while she took a fare to Shadyside. Kaminski sat in front, holding guitar pedals with control knobs. At his feet rested a boom box. The sound installation ďŹ lled the car with feedback, giving way to warm, crinkly static. It sounded like Kaminski was tuning an old radio.

He held a contact mic that picked up vibrations in solid objects, moving it from the seat to the door and the dashboard. Wordlessly, Warman extended what might have been a 10-minute trip to 30 minutes to give Kaminski time to ďŹ nish the show. She did laps around the Edward Manning Bigelow monument on Schenley Drive, and even took a few cobblestone roads to transform the sound.

Warman, a Portland-area native, studied at George Washington University, in Washington, D.C., before moving to Pittsburgh in 2011. She lives in Highland Park, works full time at Whole Foods and juggles projects including a subscription-based newsletter. Every month, she ďŹ lls 4-by-6-inch postcards with poems and illustrations, then mails them to 100 people. The idea is to share her work outside of the Internet. “I wanted to force myself into people’s houses,â€? she says.

Much of Warman’s work involves creating new spaces in which to form human connections. Jokingly, she compares her projects to the “Holy Trinity�: “the newsletter, the jitney service and myself as Jesus.�

INFO@ PGHC ITY PAP ER.CO M

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[PLAY REVIEW] DRAG HIM TO A SHOW HE'LL ACTUALLY ENJOY!

UNLIKE

{BY F.J. HARTLAND} John Patrick Shanley is known for creating quirky, lovable Italian-American characters.

Remember Moonstruck?

In Italian American Reconciliation, at Little Lake Theatre, Shanley gives us five very quirky characters.

Unfortunately, he forgot the “lovable� part.

In NYC’s Little Italy, Huey (Nathan Bell) decides he can’t live without his ex-wife, Janice (Liz Roberts) — even though she shot and killed his dog. He enlists the help of his best friend, Aldo (Eric Leslie): Huey will break up with his current waitress girlfriend, Teresa (Michelina Anne Pollini), while Aldo butters up Janice. Adding a monkey wrench to the story is Teresa’s Aunt May (Mary Romeo).

The cast tries to be likable, but they don’t get much help from the script, which paints them as whiners.

Leslie (as Aldo) has great interplay with the audience throughout the show. And his physical comedy is on the mark. But Bell spends most of this modern play dressed as some Renaissance peasant, supposedly to “return to the past.� If this is Shanley’s idea of “funny,� it doesn’t work.

As for the female characters, Romeo brings much-needed humor to the show.

But Roberts is burdened with playing a truly unsympathetic character. Remember shooting the dog? That’s not the worst of what she’s done. And this is the woman Huey can’t live without?

Roberts and Leslie do share the best scene of the show, at the top of Act II. The dialects are very uneven. Either everyone should learn the accent, or no one should do one. Leslie comes the closest to achieving the correct sound, while Bell all but abandons his dialect halfway through his first scene.

Director Art DeConciliis does an admirable job keeping this very sit-and-talk play moving. This play would truly be a snooze in the hands of an inexperienced director.

And he keeps the pace of the production moving well. It’s just one of those plays that every time the lights go down, you think it’s over. And then the lights come up ‌ again.

With any luck at all, DeConciliis and this plucky band of actors will one day work together again on a more entertaining show.

Broadway’s Smash Comedy About the Sexes

THE CAST TRIES TO BE LIKABLE, BUT THEY DON’T GET MUCH HELP FROM THE SCRIPT, WHICH PAINTS THEM AS WHINERS.

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ITALIAN AMERICAN RECONCILIATION continues through Aug. 10. Little Lake Theatre, 500 Lakeside Drive (off Route 19), Canonsburg. $12-23. 724-745-6300 or www.littlelake.org

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NOW - OCT 20

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ALL SEVEN HARRY POTTER BOOKS IN SEVENTY HILARIOUS MINUTES! “a Godsend.�

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FOR THE WEEK OF

08.0108.08.13

FOR INFORMATION ON HOW TO SUBMIT LISTINGS AND PRESS RELEASES, CALL 412.316.3342 X161.

AUG. 02

Carrie Furnaces: Contemporary Views

Art by Scott Goldsmith {IMAGE COURTESY OF THE ARTIST}

+ FRI., AUG. 02 {ART}

Wednesdays - 5pm to 8pm Thursdays - 5pm to 8pm Fridays - 4pm to 6pm

If it seems like just last week we were telling you about the Rivers of Steel National Heritage Area’s seasonal tours of the Carrie Blast Furnaces, well, we were. But the hits just keep coming for this longdecommissioned industrial site in Rankin, now well into its second act as a National

Historic Landmark, tourist destination, movie set … and installation-art site for a giant found-object deer-head sculpture. Add to that list “photographer’s playground”: The latest tribute is Carrie Furnaces: Contemporary Views, a Silver Eye Center for Photography exhibition of 51 photographs by 32 artists. The images were culled from an open call that drew 332 photographs. The show, co-presented with Rivers

DRINK SPECIALS

CHEF’S SELECTION PALATE PLEASERS

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

{MUSIC} Matrimony, a North Carolina folk band, weds rock, gospel and country to Irish and American folk. The group formed around a musical newlywed couple, Ashlee Hardee Brown and Northern Ireland ex-pat Jimmy Brown.

Later, the band expanded to include Ashlee Brown’s brothers, Jordan and CJ Hardee, and bassist Ethan Ricks. In 2011, Matrimony performed at Austin’s SXSW music festival, and tonight, it plays a concert on the grounds of the Frick Art & Historical Center as part of the Frick’s 19th-annual First Fridays series. Olivia Lammel 7 p.m. 7227 Reynolds St., Point Breeze. Free (suggested donation of $5 per adult). 412-3710600 or thefrickpittsburgh.org

{ART}

$1 each

25 Market Square perlepgh.com

of Steel, opens with tonight’s reception. Bill O’Driscoll 6-8 p.m. 1015 E. Carson St., South Side. Free. 412-431-1810 or www.silvereye.org

AUG. 02

Matrimony

If you love art, there’ll probably be something you dig at this month’s Penn Avenue gallery crawl Unblurred. Garfield Artworks hosts the launch of If Not You, Then Who?, the fourth in local author Tricia Klinkhamer’s “You = Love” kids’-book series (illustrated

{PHOTO COURTESY OF MICHAEL EDWARDS}

sp otlight In 2011, GQ named Pittsburgh the “third worst-dressed city in America.” Gil Mansfield wrote, “There is no city on Earth that can equal the utter sloppiness of Pittsburgh.”Wadria Taylor, founder and CEO of event-planning company Style & Steel, agrees: She’s tired of seeing Pittsburghers in their pajamas. But where GQ sees a bunch of hopeless slobs, Taylor discerns potential. She insists the city houses hordes of style geniuses, from designers to makeup artists. But she fears that unless Pittsburgh gets its act together, that talent will leave. This summer, Taylor hopes to help cultivate Pittsburgh’s style renaissance. She has spent the past four months organizing the inaugural Style Week Pittsburgh, which kicks off Aug. 7 with a champagne-cocktail launch party at Downtown’s Perlé lounge. This five-day affair is distinct from the upcoming Pittsburgh Fashion Week, which is filled with fashion shows and focused on clothes and accessories. Style Week includes only one fashion show, which will take a retrospective look at style, starting in the 1970s. (Some proceeds will benefit Gwen’s Girls, a local charity.) Style Week also includes the Superwoman in Heels Style Awards, which is a style networking party at the Pittsburgh Urban Winery; a Beauty Boot Camp event at LaLa’s Salon; and a free boutique crawl. Olivia Lammel Wed., Aug. 7-Aug. 11. All-access: $70 (regular)-$125 (VIP); individual events start at $10. www.styleandsteel.net or 412-208-0249

AUG. 02

Unblurred

Art by T.R. Reed

by Dean Anthony Cercone Jr.), with live music and coloring activities. At the Irma Freeman Center for Imagination, there’s Automata, A Kinetic Art Show, in which artists from across the country offer art with moving parts, including hands-on activities and live music by BurnOut WarCry and Mike Tamburo. (A work by T.R. Reed is pictured.)

Artisan has paintings by tattoo artist Nathan Mould. And don’t forget What If Airplanes Were Lawnmowers?, a mixedmedia, found-materials show at Studio 5013; Ex Libris, a show of book-themed papercuts, sculptures and other book-themed art at Most Wanted Fine Art; late night’s Habeas Corpus tango-dancing at the law office of Richard J. Walters; and more. BO Most venues open by 7 p.m. 41005500 Penn Ave., Bloomfield/ Garfield/Friendship. Free.

412-389-5521

Sean Graney weaves together the whole of the Oedipus saga as told by Aeschylus, Sophocles and Euripides. Graney, a noted specialist in adapting Greek tragedies, is founding director of acclaimed Chicago-based troupe The Hypocrites. This world-premiere production, which opens tonight, is directed by Pittsburgh native Steven Wilson, a frequent collaborator of Graney’s. The all-Pittsburgh cast includes Todd Betker, Tressa Glover and Ricardo Vila-Roger. BO 8 p.m.

Continues through Aug. 17.

Off the Wall Theater, 25 W. Main St., Carnegie. $15. www. nonameplayers.org

+ SAT., AUG. 03 {KIDS} “Blocks, Bricks and Boulevards” is the title of this weekend’s Frick Family Fun Day. Today, children will collaborate to build a city, using only cardboard boxes, paint and paper.

Of course, they will have to leave their cardboard creations on the lawn of the Frick Art & Historical Center, but each kid will get a chance to make a collapsible paper cityscape to take home. Croquet, beanbag-toss and other games will provide an outlet for the kids’ inevitable pent-up artistic frustrations. OL 11 a.m.-4 p.m. 7227 Reynolds St., Point Breeze. Free. 412-371-0600 or thefrickpittsburgh.org

+ WED., AUG. 07 {CIRCUS} There are no clowns or bedazzled elephants in the Crescent Circus. Like many neo-circuses, Morgan Tsu-Raun and Nathan Kepner, a duo from New Orleans, have modified the sparkly, spectacle-filled big-top tradition. They’ve kept the acrobatics and juggling, but have added more humor, audience participation and magic tricks. They have performed at colleges and corporations, for audiences in Las Vegas and London. Tonight, they give a one-night performance at Zelienople’s Strand Theater.

OL 7:30 p.m. 119 N. Main St., Zelienople. $17-22 (kids under 12: $10-15). 724-742-0400 or thestrandtheater.org

AUG. 03 Frick Family Fun Day of Denver, Colo.-based artist Leslie Minnis, whose new works are featured in the exhibit Ghost Feeding Arena.

Minnis is a veteran of the video-game industry, where she’s worked as a concept artist. She’s now re-exploring her fine-art roots, and working on a graphic novel, a psychological thriller titled Echoroad. Presumably it has the same “themes of identity, the unconscious, monstrosity, object relations, dreams and the surreal” she posits for this Gallery 4 exhibit, which features paintings inspired by sets Minnis built with painted objects she assembled from found materials. The opening reception is tonight. BO 7-11 p.m. Exhibit continues through Aug. 24. 206 S. Highland Ave., Shadyside. Free. 412-363-5050 or www.thegallery4.us

attire, performing a burlesquestyle dance review that strives to combine the old-school with the new. The show, from locally based RED Productions, promises to “make you want to get up and dance.” BO 10:30 p.m. $10 (21-and-over only); free to ticket-holders for earlier Cultural District shows. 412-456-6666 or www.trustarts.org

+ THU., AUG. 08 {PROTEST} More and more, corporations are implanting genes from

one creature into another — think tomatoes with fish DNA — and claiming it improves the food supply. And more and more, activists warn that genetically modified organisms mean more pesticides in the environment, and more risks for humans, on whom the long-term effects of eating GMOs are unknown.

Among other things, activists are fighting to require state government or the feds to label GMO foods, as they do in Japan, Brazil and even China. Such labeling is the goal of the otherwise lighthearted Are We Eating Fishy Food Tour, which involves five art cars roof-mounted with spoofy versions of GMOs, including a giant hybrid corncob/fish. Two days into this 11-day cross-country trip from Washington, D.C., to Seattle, The Fishy Food Tour tailgates at tonight’s Pirates game. Look for these scary (or are they more on the cute side?) cars starting at 5 p.m. BO www.

AreWeEatingFishyFood.com

AUG. 08

Are We Eating Fishy Food Tour

{ART} {STAGE} Not content to have just closed a rock musical comedy about defeating fascism, No Name Players are ready to delve, well, rather deeper into Western history. In Oedipus and the Foul Mess in Thebes, playwright

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The settings are like this: a jumble of random music instruments, a tumble-down fireplace, a mosaic fish, a saw; or else tree limbs bearing lockboxes, sprouting from wallpaper printed with labyrinths. And each scene is inhabited by a young woman.

Such are the oil paintings

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{BURLESQUE} Likely this is saucier fare than you’re used to at the Cabaret at Theater Square — but the joint is, after all, called a “cabaret.” So catch the debut run of Burlesque: The Introduction. The six-member troupe includes five women in spangly (and typically scanty)

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{ALL LISTINGS MUST BE SUBMITTED BY 9 A.M. FRIDAY PRIOR TO PUBLICATION}

TO SUBMIT A LISTING: HTTP://HAPPENINGS.PGHCITYPAPER.COM 412.316.3388 (FAX) + 412.316.3342 X161 (PHONE)

THEATER BUDDY - THE BUDDY

OFFIC OF THE P IAL DJ ITTS CELEBRAT BURGH ION!

PROUD PARTNER

www.pittsburghdjcompany.com itt b hdj

HOLLY STORY. Presented by Pittsburgh CLO. Thru Aug. 4.

Benedum Center, Downtown.

412-456-6666.

DEFENDING THE CAVEMAN. A comedic & prehistoric look at the battle of the sexes. Wed-Sun. Thru Oct. 20. Pittsburgh CLO, Downtown. 412-456-6666.

EXPRESS BURLESQUE. Presented

by RED Productions. Sat. Thru Aug. 3. Cabaret at Theater Square, Downtown. 412-325-6769.

FIDDLER ON THE ROOF. Aug. 1-3 and Aug. 9-10.

CCAC South Campus, West Mifflin.

412.469.6219.

GENESIS: ACTS OF THE WORD. The story of God’s foundational relationship w/ mankind to life.

Performed by Marquis Laughlin.

Aug. 3-4. Father Ryan Arts Center, McKees Rocks. 412-771-3052.

GREASE. Fri, Sat. Thru Aug. 17.

Comtra Theatre, Cranberry.

724-591-8727.

ITALIAN AMERICAN RECONCILIATION. Huey

Maximilian Bonfigliano wants his ex-wife back & enlists his best friend, a confirmed bachelor, to help plead his case. Thu-Sat. Thru Aug. 10. Little Lake Theatre, Canonsburg. 724-745-6300.

JOSEPH & THE AMAZING TECHNICOLOR DREAMCOAT. Thu-Sun. Thru Aug. 11. Geyer Performing Arts Center, Scottdale.

724-887-0887.

THE LOVE LIST. Leon & Bill concoct a list of attributes for their ideal woman, but when she actually arrives on the scene, the men learn that the list could use a few revisions. Thu-Sun. Thru Aug. 3. South Park Theatre, Bethel Park. 412-831-8552.

MCKEESPORT LITTLE THEATER MUSICAL REVUE. Aug. 1-4. McKeesport Little Theater, McKeesport.

412-673-1100.

MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING. Shakespeare’s play performed in “Neo-Folk” style. Presented by Urban Impact Shakes. Aug. 6-7.

New Hazlett Theater, North Side.

412-321-3811 x 128.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

THE MUSIC MAN. Presented by the Butler Musical Theatre Guild.

Aug. 1-4. Succop Theater, Butler Community College, Butler.

724-285-5610.

RETRO NUNS. Cabaret dinner theater. Presented by Pohl Productions. Fri, Sat. Thru Aug. 24.

Crowne Plaza Hotel, Bethel Park.

724-746-1178.

SIDE BY SIDE BY SONDHEIM: A MUSICAL CELEBRATION. Collection of songs from Company, Follies, A Little Night Music, A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum, more. Wed-Sun. Thru Aug. 18. Cabaret at Theater Square, Downtown. 412-325-6769.

COMEDY THU 01 COMEDY OPEN MIC W/ DEREK MINTO. Thu, 9 p.m. Thru Aug. 29 Hambone’s, Lawrenceville.

412-681-4318.

PITTSBURGH IMPROV JAM. Thu, 10 p.m. Thru Aug. 15 Cabaret at Theater Square, Downtown.

412-325-6769.

PUBLICNOTICES P U BL I C NOT ICE S @P GH C IT YPAPE R . C O M

Weddings, Nightclubs, Proms, Corporate Events...

We’ll do our part to make it perfect.

FRI 02 ENGINEERING IMPROV. 8 p.m. Steel City Improv Theater, Shadyside. 412-404-2695.

PITTSBURGH COMEDY SHOWCASE W/ MIKE WYSOCKI. Fri, 9 p.m. Corner Cafe, South Side. 412-488-2995.

THIS IMPROVISED LIFE. 8 & 10 p.m. Arcade Comedy Theater, Downtown.

412-339-0608.

FRI 02 - SUN 04 ILIZA SHLESINGER. Aug. 2-4 The Improv, Waterfront.

412-462-5233.

SAT 03 JEFF KONKLE, TIM ROSS, ED BAILEY, DEREK KNOPSNYDER, TYLER NODELL. WPTS Radio Comedy Show.

8 p.m. Arcade Comedy Theater, Downtown. 412-339-0608.

SAT 03 - SUN 04 DOUG BENSON. Aug. 4: recording of the Doug Loves Movies podcast. Aug. 3-4 The Improv, Waterfront.

412-462-5233.

SUN 04 T-ROBE & FRIENDS. The Improv, Waterfront. 412-462-5233.

MON 05 808 & WELL KNOWN STRANGERS. Mon, 9 p.m. Thru Aug. 26 Steel City Improv Theater, Shadyside. 412-404-2695.

PANIC & HOTEL NOWHERE. Mon, 8 p.m. Thru Aug. 26 Steel City Improv Theater, Shadyside.

412-404-2695.

TUE 06 OPEN MIC STAND UP COMEDY NITE. Hosted by Derek Minto & John Pridmore. Tue, 9:30 p.m. Smiling Moose, South Side. 412-612-4030.

WED 07 STAND-UP COMEDY OPEN MIC. Wed, 8 p.m. The BeerHive, Strip District. 412-904-4502.

STEEL CITY COMEDY TOUR. First Wed of every month, 8 p.m. Thru Oct. 2 Buckhead Saloon, Station Square. 412-232-3101.

EXHIBITS ARTDFACT. Artdfact Gallery.

An eclectic showroom of fine art sculpture & paintings from emerging artists. North Side.

724-797-3302.

AUGUST WILSON CENTER FOR AFRICAN AMERICAN CULTURE. Pittsburgh: Reclaim, Renew, Remix.

Feat. imagery, film & oral history CONTINUES ON PG. 41

BIG LIST, CONTINUED FROM PG. 40

Work by Maximum Traffic, from Obscuro Bezango! at Future Tenant.

ONGOING

VISUAL

ART

NEW THIS WEEK 179 STUDIO. Group Art Show.

Opening Aug. 2, 6-9 p.m.

Lawrenceville.

BOULEVARD GALLERY. Norweigan Flow & Others, Spiritual Energy Unleashed.

Paintings by Mary Ellen McShea & Elaine Bergstrom.

Artist reception: Aug. 3, 6-9 p.m.

Verona. 412-828-1031.

CAVO. Pittsburgh-En Masse.

Work by Phoenix Rose, Jay DeLutis, Rachel Toxic, Dan Landoni, Matt Hunter, Liz Dabecco, more. Opens Aug. 1, 8 p.m. Presented by RAW:natural born artists.

Steubenville. 724-771-3875.

COMMONPLACE COFFEEHOUSE. RELDmetal.

Robust finger sculptures by Sarah Jane Sindler. Opening reception: Aug. 9, 7-9 p.m.

Squirrel Hill. 412-422-0404.

FUTURE TENANT. Obscuro Bezango! Work by Thomas Rehm, Elmore “Buzz” Buzzizyk, & Maximum Traffic. Opening reception: Aug. 2, 7-10 p.m.

Downtown. 412-325-7037.

GALLERIE CHIZ. Energetic Escapes. Work by Scott Hunter & Blake Anthony. Opening reception: Aug. 2, 5:30-8:30 p.m.

Shadyside. 412-441-6005.

THE GALLERY 4. Ghost Feeding Arena. New works

by Leslie Minnis. Opening reception: Aug. 3, 7-11 p.m.

Shadyside. 412-363-5050.

IRMA FREEMAN CENTER FOR IMAGINATION. Automata,

a Kinetic Art Show. Work by Zac Coffin, Nick Romero, Alberto Almareza, Katy Dement, T.R. Reed, Jeannie Holland, Sylvia Cross, more. Opening reception: Aug. 2, 7-10 p.m. Garfield.

412-924-0634.

THE MR. ROBOTO PROJECT. Steel Wool. A show of rogue needlepoint. Opens Aug. 2, 7 p.m. Bloomfield.

PENN AVENUE ARTS DISTRICT. Unblurred Gallery Crawl. Garfield.

412-441-6147-ext.-7.

PHOTO ANTIQUITIES. Hand Tinted Vintage Photographs. Hand tinted black & white photographs on tin, paper & glass. North Side.

412-231-7881.

SHAW GALLERIES. Along The Path. Oil paintings by Christopher Boring. Closing reception: Aug. 3, 5-8 p.m.

Downtown. 412-281-4884.

SILVER EYE CENTER FOR PHOTOGRAPHY. Carrie Furnaces: Contemporary Views.

A collaborative exhibition curated from an open call for entries of images taken at the historic blast furnace. Opening reception: Aug. 2, 6-8 p.m.

South Side. 412-431-1810.

TEEREX GUERILLA RETAIL STORE. Carnegie International/ Pittsburgh Event. Part of the 2013 Carnegie International & Unblurred. Opens Aug. 2, 6-10 p.m. Friendship.

412-622-3316.

709 PENN GALLERY. Chris McGinnis: The Productive Machine. Multimedia exhibit.

Downtown. 412-471-6070.

ANDY WARHOL MUSEUM. All Through the Night. LGBQT photography by Caldwell Linker. S/HE IS HER/E. Feat. over 100 works by Genesis Breyer P-Orridge, dating from the mid 1970s to the present. The Patron Saint of White Guys That Went Tribal & Other Works. Work

by Nick Bubash. I Just Want to Watch: Warhol’s Film, Video and Television. Long-term exhibition of Warhol’s film & video work. Permanent collection. Artwork and artifacts by the famed Pop Artist.

North Side. 412-237-8300.

ART INSTITUTE OF PITTSBURGH. Art for a Hire Purpose. The Pittsburgh Society of Illustrators Exhibition Illustration Show. Downtown.

412-263-6600.

BLUE OLIVE GALLERIES. All Local Artists. Muli media, pottery, woods & jewelry.

Frazier. 724-275-7001.

BOXHEART GALLERY. Mythical Tales, Flight Paths, & Figures of the Sky. Mixed media works by John Humphries. Bloomfield.

412-687-8858.

THE BREW HOUSE. Seven Degrees of 7. Work by Distillery 7 Program artists Alexis Roberto, Cara Livorio, Crystala Armagost, Josh Mitchel, Elizabeth Brophy, Kate Hansen & Terrence M. Boyd. South Side. 412-381-7767.

CARNEGIE MUSEUM OF ART. The Playground Project.

A richly illustrated exhibition exploring the history of postwar playground design & highlighting important examples of playgrounds from the 20th century. Oakland. 412-622-3131.

CHATHAM UNIVERSITY. Culture in Context. African Art from the Olkes Collection.

Shadyside. 412-365-1232.

CHRISTINE FRECHARD GALLERY. Off the Wall.

Work by Marco Brun, Alice Winn, David Passafiume, Christopher Sprowls. Squirrel Hill. 412-421-8888.

FILMMAKERS GALLERIES. Pigment & Silver. Photography

by Ellen Bjerklie-Hanna, A. Jason Coleman, Danielle Goshay, Brenda Roger, & Cynthia Zordich. Oakland. 412-681-5449.

FRICK ART & HISTORICAL CENTER. The Clayton Days, Revisited: A Project by Vik Muniz. Feat. his 65-photo collection. Permanent collection of European Art. Point Breeze. 412-371-0600.

GALERIE WERNER, THE MANSIONS ON FIFTH. RetroFRESH. Contemporary CONTINUES ON PG. 43

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narratives to explore communities, middle-class home. Oakmont. cultures, & innovations.

412-826-9295.

Downtown. 412-258-2700.

LAWRENCE HALL GALLERY. CARNEGIE MUSEUM OF The Silk Road. Photo exhibition ART. The Playground Project. of images taken along the Silk Survey exploring the history Road in Afghanistan, Pakistan, of post-war playground Nepal & India in 1972 by Albin design & highlighting important & Virginia Curtze. Downtown. examples of playgrounds from 412-391-4100. the 20th century. Oakland.

MARIDON MUSEUM. Collection 412-622-3131. includes jade and ivory statues CARNEGIE MUSEUM OF from China and Japan, as well NATURAL HISTORY. Garden of as Meissen porcelain. Butler.

Light: Works by Paula Crevoshay.

724-282-0123.

Feat. nearly 70 fine art jewelry NATIONAL AVIARY. Home to pieces. Roads of Arabia: more than 600 birds from over Archaeology & History of the 200 species. With classes, lectures, Kingdom of Saudi Arabia. demos and more. North Side.

Archaeological materials 412-323-7235. exploring the cultural history of the NATIONALITY ROOMS. 26 Arabian Peninsula. Ongoing: rooms helping to tell the Earth Revealed, Dinosaurs story of Pittsburgh’s In Their Time, more. immigrant past.

Oakland. 412-622-3131.

University of CARNEGIE SCIENCE Pittsburgh. Oakland.

CENTER. BIKES: Science 412-624-6000. www. per a p on Two Wheels. Feat.

OLIVER MILLER pghcitym o .c hands-on activities, HOMESTEAD. This demonstrations & a pioneer/Whiskey collection of historic, rare, & Rebellion site features log peculiar bicycles. Ongoing: house, blacksmith shop & gardens.

Buhl Digital Dome (planetarium), South Park. 412-835-1554.

Miniature Railroad and Village, PHIPPS CONSERVATORY USS Requin submarine, and more. & BOTANICAL GARDEN. North Side. 412-237-3400.

Butterfly Forest. Watch CARRIE FURNACE. Built in 1907, butterflies emerge from their Carrie Furnaces 6 & 7 are extremely chrysalises to flutter among rare examples of pre World War II tropical blooms. Summer Flower iron-making technology. Rankin.

Show. Glass art surrounded 412-464-4020 x.21. by colorful blooms. Feat. work by CENTER FOR POSTNATURAL Daviea Davis, Jason Forck, Steven HISTORY. Explore the complex Sadvary, Lisa Platt, more. 14 indoor interplay between culture, nature rooms & 3 outdoor gardens and biotechnology. Open Fridays feature exotic plants and floral 5-8, Saturdays 12-4 & Sundays displays from around the world.

12-4. Garfield. 412-223-7698.

Oakland. 412-622-6914.

COMPASS INN. Demos and tours PINBALL PERFECTION. Pinball with costumed guides featuring museum & players club. West this restored stagecoach stop.

View. 412-931-4425.

Ligonier. 724-238-4983.

PITTSBURGH GLASS CENTER. CONNEY M. KIMBO GALLERY. Lifeforms. Exhibition of natural University of Pittsburgh Jazz imagery in lampworked glass.

Exhibit: Memorabilia & Awards Curated by Robert Mickelsen. from the International Hall of Friendship. 412-365-2145.

Fame. Oakland. 412-648-7446.

PITTSBURGH ZOO & PPG DEPRECIATION LANDS AQUARIUM. Home to 4,000 MUSEUM. Small living history animals, including many museum celebrating the endangered species. Highland settlement and history of the Park. 412-665-3639.

Depreciation Lands. Allison Park.

RACHEL CARSON 412-486-0563.

HOMESTEAD. A Reverence FALLINGWATER. Tour the for Life. Photos and artifacts famed Frank Lloyd Wright house. of her life & work. Springdale.

Ohiopyle. 724-329-8501.

724-274-5459.

FIRST PRESBYTERIAN RIVERS OF STEEL NATIONAL CHURCH. Tours of 13 Tiffany HERITAGE AREA. Exhibits stained-glass windows. on the Homestead Mill. Steel industry and community artifacts Downtown. 412-471-3436. from 1881-1986. Homestead.

FRICK ART & HISTORICAL 412-464-4020.

CENTER. Ongoing: tours of SENATOR JOHN HEINZ Clayton, the Frick estate, with HISTORY CENTER. Pennsylvania’s classes, car & carriage museum.

Civil War. In-depth look at Point Breeze. 412-371-0600.

Pennsylvania’s significant HARTWOOD ACRES. Tour contributions during the Civil this Tudor mansion and stable War feat. artifacts, military complex, and enjoy hikes encampments, life-like museum and outdoor activities in the figures, more. From Slavery to surrounding park. Allison Park.

Freedom. Highlight’s Pittsburgh’s 412-767-9200. role in the anti-slavery movement.

KENTUCK KNOB. Tour the Ongoing: Western PA Sports other Frank Lloyd Wright house.

Museum, Clash of Empires, and Chalk Hill. 724-329-8501. exhibits on local history, more.

KERR MEMORIAL MUSEUM. Strip District. 412-454-6000.

Tours of a restored 19th-century,

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SEWICKLEY HEIGHTS HISTORY CENTER. Museum commemorates Pittsburgh industrialists, local history.

Sewickley. 412-741-4487.

ST. ANTHONY’S CHAPEL. Features 5,000 relics of Catholic saints. North Side.

412-323-9504.

ST. NICHOLAS CROATIAN CATHOLIC CHURCH. Maxo Vanka Murals. Mid-20th century murals depicting war, social justice and the immigrant experience in America. Millvale.

421-681-0905.

FESTIVALS THU 01 ART IN THE PARK. Food, music, vendors, more. Thu, 6-8:30 p.m.

Thru Aug. 29 Penn Avenue Parklet, Wilkinsburg. 412-727-7855.

THU 01 - SAT 03 ST. ALEXIS FESTIVAL. Games, skating rink, flea market, live entertainment, beer garden, more. Thru Aug. 3 St. Alexis Catholic Church, Wexford. 724-935-4343.

FRI 02 GARFIELD NIGHT MARKET. Feat. local vendors. Part of Unblurred. N. Pacific Ave. between Penn & Dearborn, Garfield. 6-10 p.m.

CONTINUES ON PG. 42

YOUNG THE GIANT

PLUS MORE! Visit PROMO tab at pghcitypaper.com for your chance to WIN PRIZES! Hint: Find the Left side of the Bottle

C L A S S I F I E D S

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BIG LIST, CONTINUED FROM PG. 41

WED, JULY 31 • 8PM AMERICANA/FOLK ROCK

RYAN DILLAHA AND THE MIRACLE MEN

AUGUST 1 BURLESQUE SHOW

AUGUST 8 STEVE THOMPSON & THE PROFESSIONALS, ABACUS JONES, THE LEAFS

AUGUST 15 THESE LIONS

$2 PBR Drafts Everyday 9-11

$5 PBR Drafts & Fireball Shot All Day ‘till Midnight

FRI, AUGUST 2 • 9PM FUNK/ROCK/SOUL

OLD E ALLSTARS SAT, AUGUST 3 • 9PM ROCKABILLY

THE BESSMERS TUES, AUGUST 6 • 9PM JAZZ

SPACE EXCHANGE SERIES FEATURING DAVID THROCKMORTON OPEN FOR LUNCH Kitchen hours: M-Th: 11am-12am Fri & Sat: 11am-1am Sun: 11am-11pm

4023 BU TLER ST LAWREN CEVILLE 41 2.682.0177

www.thunderbirdcafe.net

ST. ALEXIS FESTIVAL. Games, skating rink, flea market, live entertainment, beer garden, more. Thru Aug. 3 St. Alexis Catholic Church, Wexford.

724-935-4343.

DANCE FRI 02 ELECTROBELLY DANCE TROUPE. DJs Mr. Stitch & Adam Oliveri. 6 p.m. Club Cafe, South Side. 412-431-4950.

SUN 04 PERFORMING ARTS FESTIVAL. Feat. live music & performances

by H2O Contemporary Dance, The Pillow Project, The Dance Conservatory of Pittsburgh, more.

4 p.m. The Dance Conservatory of Pittsburgh - Canonsburg, Canonsburg. 412-344-3900.

EACH AND EVERY THURSDAY! 42

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

community-outreach director from Swissvale WHEN: Sat.,

July 27

I live in Swissvale, so I had a free tour of the Carrie Blast Furnace. I’ve been wanting to do it, and then when I saw that I could come for free, I was like, “Hey, why not?” My father worked in the Homestead Steel Mill for almost 30 years, so it was always a part of my life.

It’s just nice coming to see something that you were never able to see when it was functioning. I think it’s very fascinating. If people have the time and interest, they can come down, take a tour, walk around and talk to the people who used to work here. They’re full of knowledge. You get a full flavor of the real history of the Carrie Furnace site. I hope that Rivers of Steel is able to continue to preserve the site, because I think it is an important part of Western Pennsylvania history.

BY OLIVIA LAMMEL

FUNDRAISERS

SAT 03

$3

CRITIC: Joellen Welsh, 51, a

ST. RAPHAEL’S BAZAAR. Games, Polish & Italian foods, live music, flea market, Chinese auction, bingo, more. Aug. 7-11 St. Raphael Church, Morningside.

412-661-3100.

YOGA FOR FARM SANCTUARY. 6:30 p.m. BYS Yoga, South Side.

740-317-1327.

Mike’s Lemonade and Black Cherry Lemonade Cans

in Rankin

WED 07

FRI 02

$3

Carrie Blast Furnaces tours,

65TH ANNUAL BUTLER FARM SHOW. Farming exhibits, tractor pulls, crafts, rides, food, more.

Aug. 5-10 Butler Farm Show Grounds, Butler. 724-482-4000.

MYLAN CLASSIC. Golf tournament benefiting regional charities. Thru Aug. 4 Southpointe Golf Club, Canonsburg.

412-771-6460 x 305.

Corona and Corona Ligh t Cans

EVENT: Rivers of Steel’s

MON 05 - WED 07

THU 01 - SUN 04

THE BEACH CLUB SUMMER DECK PARTY

EVERYONE IS A CRITIC

6TH ANNUAL KEVIN FRENOCK MEMORIAL HOCKEY TOURNAMENT. Also feat. silent auction, 50/50 raffle, food, more.

9 a.m.-9 p.m. South Park Roller Hockey Rink, South Park.

412-735-4245.

KETTELER AWARDS FOR SOCIAL JUSTICE. Honoring Gregory J. Boyle, SJ. Benefits Homeboy Industries. 7 p.m. Kearns Spirituality Center, Allison Park.

412-635-5437.

ST. BARNABAS 5K RUN/WALK. 9 a.m. St. Barnabas Health Care System, Gibsonia. 724-444-5326.

SUN 04 BOOK ‘EM BOOKS TO PRISONERS WORK PARTY. Read & code letters, pick books, pack ‘em or database ‘em!

Sundays 4-7 p.m. or by appt.

Thomas Merton Center, Garfield.

412-361-3022.

PITTSBURGH PLAY FOR A PURPOSE. Soccer tournament, West African music, more.

Benefiting the Cameroon Football

Development Program. 1 p.m.

Cathedral of Learning, Oakland.

304-281-5649.

MON 05 SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS OF THE NEUMANN COMMUNITIES GOLF TOURNAMENT. Register at www.sosf.org 12 p.m. Sewickley Heights Golf Club, Sewickley.

412-821-2200.

WPMSDC GOLF OUTING. Benefits the Western PA Minority Supplier Development Council. 8:30 a.m.

Quicksilver Golf Club, Midway.

412-391-4423.

WED 07 10TH ANNUAL SAMPLE OF STATION SQUARE. Benefits the Western PA Humane Society.

5:30 p.m. Station Square, Station Square. 412-321-4625 x 248.

POLITICS SUN 04 HOMOPHELIA. Queer justice brainstorm session & poetry reading. Presented by Capital’s End. 6:30-9:30 p.m. Borland Garden, East Liberty.

LITERARY THU 01 ENGLISH LEARNERS’ BOOK CLUB. For advanced ESL students. Presented in cooperation w/ the Greater Pittsburgh Literacy Council. Thu, 1 p.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt.

Lebanon. 412-531-1912.

THE HOUR AFTER HAPPY HOUR WRITER’S WORKSHOP. Young writers & recent graduates looking for additional feedback on their work. thehourafterhappyhour. wordpress.com Third and First Thu of every month The Big Idea Bookstore & Cafe, Bloomfield.

412-687-4323.

FRI 02 ELISABET RODRIGUEZ DENNEHY. Author of Can You Afford to Ignore Me? How to Manage Gender and Cultural Differences at Work.

Barnes & Noble Café. 5:30 p.m.

Duquesne University, Uptown.

412-396-6000.

JOANNA LOWE, MOLLY ALPHABET, JUDE SOLTESZ. The Girlie Show Round Four.

9 p.m. Hambone’s, Lawrenceville.

412-681-4318.

MON 05 OPEN POETRY WORKSHOP. Presented by the Pittsburgh Poetry Exchange. First Mon of every month, 7-10 p.m.

Brentwood Library, Brentwood.

412-882-5694.

READING ROUND TABLE. Feat. plays from August Wilson & new works by up & coming playwrights. First Mon of every month, 7 p.m. August Wilson Center for African American Culture, Downtown. 412-258-2700.

TUE 06 JAPANESE CONVERSATION CLUB. First and Third Tue of every month, 6 p.m. Carnegie Library, Oakland. 412-622-3151.

KID’S BOOKS FOR GROWN-UPS BOOKCLUB. First Tue of every month, 10 a.m.

Penguin Bookshop, Sewickley.

412-741-3838.

LET’S SPEAK ENGLISH! Practice conversational English.

Tue, 6 p.m. Carnegie Library, Squirrel Hill. 412-422-9650.

WED 07 CARNEGIE KNITS & READS. Informal knitting session. Wed, 5 p.m. Carnegie Library, Oakland.

412-622-3116.

KIDSTUFF THU 01 STARTUP SOMETHING LAUNCH PARTY. Program introducing 12-18 year olds to technology & entrepreneurship.

Presented by Big Brothers Big Sisters of Greater Pittsburgh.

6-8 p.m. TechShop, East Liberty.

412-363-6100.

THU 01 - FRI 02 A PRINTER, A BAKER, A HISTORY MAKER: AN INTERACTIVE CAMP. Explore 19th century life. Ages 6-12. Thru Aug. 2 Old Economy Village, Ambridge. 724-266-4500 x 110.

THU 01 - WED 07 ADVENTURES W/ CLIFFORD THE BIG RED DOG. 9-foot tall Clifford w/ tail slide, build a sandcastle on T-Bone’s beach, play instruments in the Musical Marina, more. Thru Sept. 1 Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side.

412-322-5058.

BACKYARD EXHIBIT. Musical swing set, sandbox, solar-powered instruments, more. Ongoing Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058.

FRI 02 IF NOT YOU, THEN WHO? YOU EQUAL LOVE! Children’s book release party w/ author Tricia Klinkhamer. 7-10 p.m.

Garfield Artworks, Garfield.

412-361-2262.

SOUNDWAVES STEEL BAND OPEN HOUSE. Ages 12–17.

6-8 p.m. The Alloy Studios, Friendship. 412-363-3000.

THE TALE OF SNOW WHITE. Presented by the Baldwin Borough Library Drama Club.

7 p.m. Harrison Middle School, Baldwin.

TEEN LOCK-IN. 7 p.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912.

FRI 02 - SAT 03 CHARLIE & THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY. Presented by Little Lake’s Looking Glass Theatre.

Wed, Fri, Sat. Thru Aug. 3 Little Lake Theatre, Canonsburg.

724-745-6300.

VISUAL ART

SAT 03 ALAMEDA YOUTH TRIATHLON. 8 a.m. Alameda Park, Butler.

724-284-5383.

DEAR EDWINA. Children’s musical presented by the Mon Valley Performing Arts Academy. 4 p.m. California University, California.

724-938-4220.

FAMILY FUN DAY: BLOCKS, BRICKS & BOULEVARDS. Help design & decorate a cityscape on the lawn.

11 a.m.-4 p.m. Frick Art & Historical Center, Point Breeze.

412-371-0600.

LET’S MOVE! FAMILY DANCE PARTY. Feat. Citiparks Roving Art Cart, face painting, balloon twisters, more.

11 a.m.-2 p.m. Kelly-Strayhorn Theater, East Liberty.

412-363-3000.

SAT 03 - SUN 04 MIDNIGHT RADIO JR.: UNDERWATER VOYAGE. Live sketch/variety show for kids ages 6-12. Sat, Sun, 2 p.m. Thru Aug. 4 Bricolage, Downtown.

412-471-0999.

MYTH ADVENTURES: FIVE GREEK CLASSICS. Presented

by Theatre Factory KidWorks.

Fri-Sun. Thru Aug. 11 The Theatre Factory, Trafford.

412-374-9200.

SUN 04 PLAY W/ CLAY ON THE POTTER’S WHEEL. Ages 3+.

Sun. Thru Aug. 25 Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058.

SNOWBALL DAY. Snowthemed activities. 9-11 a.m.

Carnegie Science Center, North Side. 412-237-1637.

paintings by James Kennedy, Claire Hardy, Donald Deskey, Alexander Minewski, Louise Evans-Scott, Vladimir Naiditch, & Henri de Waroquier. Oakland.

412-716-1390.

GLENN GREENE STAINED GLASS STUDIO INC. Original Glass Art by Glenn Greene.

Exhibition of new work, recent work & older work. Regent Square. 412-243-2772.

GREENSBURG ART CENTER. Prelude & Fugue (A Game of Pairs). Photography

by Richard Stoner. Greensburg.

724-837-6791.

HILLMAN CENTER FOR PERFORMING ARTS. Low Tides & Bucolic Daze. Hand painted photography by Rosemary Pipitone. Fox Chapel. 412-968-3045.

INTERNATIONAL IMAGES. The New Art of Wen Gao. Sewickley.

412-741-3036.

JAMES GALLERY. Graphically Popular. Wood panel paintings

by David Wallace. West End. 412-922-9800.

LA PRIMA ESPRESSO. Paintings/Prints of Italy.

Prints of Vince Ornato’s oil paintings of Italy. Strip District.

412-281-1922.

LAKEVUE ATHLETIC CLUB. Pop-Up Gallery. Work by a variety of artists. Valencia.

724-316-9326.

Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058.

WRITING & ART WITH TESS. Story & craft-time for kids ages 5 & up. First Wed of every month, 10 a.m.

Penguin Bookshop, Sewickley.

412-741-3838.

MON 05 PLAY W/ CLAY AT THE HANDBUILDING TABLE. Ages 3+. Mon, 12-2 p.m.

Thru Aug. 26 Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058.

OUTSIDE SAT 03

TUE 06 KAMISHIBAI: JAPANESE STORY TELLING. Story-telling, make your own candy sushi, learn to use chopsticks, more. Children must be accompanied by an adult. 1-3 p.m. Maridon Museum, Butler. 724-282-0123.

BUTTERFLIES OF RACCOON CREEK. 2-4 p.m. Raccoon Creek State Park, w Hookstown. paper pghcitym 724-899-3611. .co DOG DAYS OF SUMMER: BARKS & BRUNCH. Play games, learn about dog safety, more. 9:30-11:30 a.m.

Wingfield Pines, Upper St. Clair.

412-741-2750.

PUBLIC STARGAZING PARTY. Presented by the Amateur Astronomers Association of Pittsburgh. 8 p.m. Kunkle Park, Washington.

QUEST FOR THE KING: LAKE ARTHUR ECO RELAY RACE. Part of the Regatta at Lake Arthur. Presented by the Allegheny Aquatic Alliance.

Moraine State Park, Butler.

724-368-8811.

REGATTA FIREWORKS PADDLE. Ages 12+. Begins at

FULL LIST E N O LwIN w.

WED 07 FUN W/ ANIMALS: MOTHER NATURE’S DINER. All about birds! Ages 3-6.

10:30 a.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon.

412-531-1912.

THE JOSH & GAB SHOW. Anti-bullying musical comedy program. 12:15 p.m. Children’s Museum of Pittsburgh, North Side. 412-322-5058.

LISTEN & RESPONSE. Listening experiments w/ music, noise & other sounds. Aug. 7-8

CONTINUED FROM PG. 41

MALL AT ROBINSON. Perspective 2013: A Photography Exhibition.

Robinson. 412-788-0816.

MATTRESS FACTORY. Ongoing Installations. Works by Turrell, Lutz, Kusama, Anastasi, Highstein, Wexler & Woodrow.

North Side. 412-231-3169.

MENDELSON GALLERY. Remembering Glen Whittaker (1950-2013). Shadyside.

412-361-8664.

MODERNFORMATIONS GALLERY. Dear Universe: New Encaustic Works by Benedict Oddi. Garfield.

412-362-0274.

MORGAN CONTEMPORARY GLASS GALLERY. Glassweekend ‘13. Work

by Rhoda Baer, John de Wit, Jon Goldberg, Mikyoung Jung, Catherine Labonte, Matthew Perez, Erica Rosenfeld, more. Shadyside.

412-441-5200.

PHOTO ANTIQUITIES. Photography of the Great Gatsby Era. See what cameras were popular in the Roaring 20’s including Kodak Vest Pocket Cameras & Vanity Cameras, beautifully housed in Art Deco styled cases. Some even came complete with a mirror and lipstick for those flappers on the go! North Side.

412-231-7881.

PITTSBURGH CENTER FOR

dusk. Moraine State Park, Butler.

412-255-0564.

SAT 03 - SUN 04 EDIBLE WILD PLANT WORKSHOP. Aug. 3-4 Raccoon Creek State Park, Hookstown.

724-899-3611.

KAYAKING DISCOVERY COURSE. Presented by L.L.Bean.

Sat, Sun, 10-11:30 a.m. Thru Oct. 13 North Park, Allison Park.

412-318-1200.

REGATTA AT LAKE ARTHUR. Canoe & kayak races, children’s activities, car cruise, fishing tournament, fireworks, more.

Aug. 3-4 Moraine State Park, Butler. 724-368-8811.

TUE 06 PEST IDENTIFICATION & CONTROL WORKSHOP. 6 p.m.

Rosalina Sauro Sirianni Garden, Bellevue.

SURVIVAL BASICS. Tue, 3-4:30 p.m. Schenley Park, Oakland. 412-477-4677.

WED 07 WEDNESDAY MORNING WALK. Naturalist-led, rain or shine. Wed Beechwood Farms, Fox Chapel.

412-963-6100.

OTHER STUFF

THE ARTS. Fiberart International 2013. Juried exhibition of contemporary fiber art. Presented by the Fiberarts Guild of Pittsburgh.

Group exhibition presented by Associated Artists of Pittsburgh.

Coming Home. Fabric installation by Kay Healy. Friday Nights at Guitar Center. Work

by Allison Kaufman. Rites of Passage. Oil paintings by Maggie Mills. Shadyside.

412-361-0873.

SCHOOLHOUSE ART CENTER. Summertime Art Show & Sale. Presented

by South Arts. Bethel Park.

412-835-9898.

SOCIETY FOR CONTEMPORARY CRAFT SATELLITE GALLERY. Art Interprets Alzheimer’s. Work

by George Roby & Herbert Ascherman, Jr. Downtown.

412-261-7003.

U.S. POST OFFICE & COURTHOUSE. Whitehall Arts Courthouse Exhibit.

Paintings by Whitehall Arts members. Downtown.

412-561-4000.

WESTMORELAND MUSEUM OF AMERICAN ART. Born of Fire: The Valley Work.

Greensburg. 724-837-1500.

WOOD STREET GALLERIES. data.tron. Installation by Ryoji Ikeda. Downtown.

412-456-6666.

XXX STAR & EXTREME POLE DANCER

healthcare screenings & educational activities for families preparing to go back to school. Thru Aug. 1 and Sat., Aug. 3 Sanford-Brown Pittsburgh, Downtown.

412-281-2600 x 125.

GLOBALPITTSBURGH FIRST THURSDAYS. International community networking event. 5:30-8 p.m.

Luke Wholey’s Wild Alaskan Grille, Strip District.

412-392-4513.

HOW TO START A FOOD TRUCK. 12:15 p.m. Carnegie Library, Downtown.

412-281-7141.

INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S ASSOCIATION OF PITTSBURGH. Social, cultural club of American/international women. Thu First Baptist Church, Oakland. iwap. pittsburgh@gmail.com.

RENAISSANCE DANCE GUILD. Learn a variety of dances from the 15-17th centuries. Porter Hall, Room A18A. Thu, 8 p.m.

Carnegie Mellon University, Oakland. 412-567-7512.

WEST COAST SWING. Swing dance lessons for all levels. Thu, 7 p.m. Pittsburgh Dance Center, Bloomfield. 412-681-0111.

THU 01

THU 01 - SAT 03

FAMILY WELLNESS WEEK. Free

20TH ANNUAL RUSYN FOOD

Christina Aguchi TUESDAY-SATURDAY

JULY 30-AUG. 3 E AMATEURUNGIT. 7 WED, A

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Gianna Michaels & Sophie Dee AUGUST 8-10

OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK Mon-Sat: Noon-2am Sun: 3pm-2am

135 9th Street 412-281-7703 www.blushexotic.com DOWNTOWN PITTSBURGH

CONTINUES ON PG. 44

N E W S

NEXT WEEK: The Ultimate XXX Duo:

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BIG LIST, CONTINUED FROM PG. 43

D

ADVENTURES IN DINING

FRI 02

with the

GAY COMMUNITY Great Food t People Grea Great Fun Dont Miss This Remarkableience!

Dining Exper osphere.

Warm, Relaxed Atm

13 Friday, August 16, 20

RSVP AT: 412-337-0701 SINGLESOUTPGH@YAHOO.COM

Real hook ups, real fast.

PARTY IN THE TROPICS. Cocktails, dancing, more.

7-11 p.m. Phipps Conservatory & Botanical Garden, Oakland.

412-622-6914.

PASA WESTERN REGION MASTER CLASS: SUMMER IN THE ORGANIC ORCHARD. Workshop for care & management of an organic fruit tree orchard. 6-8 p.m.

Kretschmann Organic Farm, Rochester. 412-365-2985.

PITTSBURGH GLASS CENTER HOT JAM. Free open house feat. heat defying acts of art & a contemporary glass art exhibition.

6 p.m. Pittsburgh Glass Center, Friendship. 412-365-2145.

RAINBOW RISING COFFEE HOUSE. For gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered individuals and friends. Music, games, movies, entertainment and more. Unitarian Universalist Congregation, Smithton.

First Fri of every month 724-872-5056.

Free

TRY FOR

Try it Free!

412.566.1861 44

www.livelinks.com

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

Doug Benson is probably best known for his marijuana-themed documentary Super High Me. (His response to one anti-drug PSA: “I’ve been smoking the Can’t Find My Keys weed, and somewhere in the world, there is some Melting Into the Couch shit that would be an incredible ride!”)

These days, Benson keeps busy chatting with folks like Bob Odenkirk and Amy Poehler on his podcast, Doug Loves Movies. He’ll appear this weekend at the Improv — Saturday to do standup, Sunday for a live recording of Doug Loves Movies. 4:20 p.m.

Sat., Aug. 3, and 4:20 p.m. Sun., Aug. 4. 166 E. Bridge St., Homestead. $20. 412-462-5233 or www.improv.com

FRI 02 - SUN 04 BLACK FAMILY REUNION & CULTURAL ARTS WEEKEND. Live music, children’s activities, health screenings, more at various locations. Details at http://ceapittsburgh.org/events/ black-family-reunion Aug. 2-4 412-371-3689 x 44.

SAT 03

Local Numbers: 1.800.926.6000 Ahora en Español 18+

{PHOTO COURTESY OF ROBYN VON SWANK}

U T E O G L N I S inner Club

[COMEDY] FESTIVAL. Feat. Slavic food, performance by the Slavjane Rusyn Folk Ensemble, craft demos, more. Aug. 1-3 St. John the Baptist Orthodox Greek Catholic Church, Ambridge.

412-749-0675 THE ARTFUL GARDEN CRAFT SHOW. Handmade jewelry, paintings, photography, fabric & paper crafts, wood carvings, more. Mon-Sat, 12-4 p.m. Thru Aug. 17 North Hills Art Center, Ross.

412-364-3622.

7TH ANNUAL SHYNE AWARDS. Ceremony recognizing positive achievements in young adults. Hosted by Hosea Chanchez. 5:30 p.m. August Wilson Center for African American Culture, Downtown.

1-888-718-4253.

DOWNTOWN HAUNTED WALKING TOUR. Begins at City County Building, Downtown. Sat. Thru Aug. 31 412-302-5223.

FAMILY WELLNESS WEEK. Free healthcare screenings & educational activities for families preparing to go back to school.

Thru Aug. 1 and Sat., Aug. 3 Sanford-Brown Pittsburgh, Downtown. 412-281-2600 x 125.

ILLUSTRATION ALE RELEASE PARTY. 2013 edition debut of East End Brewery’s ale created for The ToonSeum.

7 p.m. The ToonSeum, Downtown. 412-232-0199.

INCLINE HAUNTED Mt. Washington. 412-683-5670.

SUMMER SATURDAY AT WALKING TOUR. Begins at the PROVIDENCE PLANTATION. bottom of the Monongahela 18th century living history Incline. Sat. Thru Oct. 26 program feat. fireside cooking, 412-302-5223. spinning wool, harvesting KOREAN FOR BEGINNERS. gardens, more. 10 a.m.-4 p.m.

Korean grammar & basic Providence Plantation, conversation. Sat, 1 p.m.

Evans City. 724-538-8818.

Carnegie Library, Oakland.

SWING CITY. Learn & practice 412-622-3151. swing dancing skills. Sat, 8 p.m.

KOREAN II. For those Wightman School, Squirrel Hill. who already have a basic 412-759-1569. understanding of Korean ULTRAPARTY. Street & are interested in party to support increasing proficiency.

Accessible Lebo.

Sat Carnegie Library, 8 p.m. Washington Oakland. 412-622-3151. www. per Road Business District, PEDALING pa pghcitym .co Mt. Lebanon.

THE PLANET. Feat.

412-343-3412. model campsite, fully-loaded touring bicycle, & photos illustrating an economical AMNESTY INTERNATIONAL alternative to the classic road trip.

HUMAN RIGHTS CAFE. 12-5 p.m. Carnegie Science Center, Weekly letter writing event. Sun, North Side. 412-237-3400.

4-6 p.m. Panera Bread, Oakland.

SATURDAY NIGHT SALSA 412-683-3727.

CRAZE. Free lessons, followed ARGENTINE TANGO CLASSES. by dancing. Sat, 10 p.m.

Sun. Thru Aug. 11 Wilkins School La Cucina Flegrea, Downtown.

Community Center, Swissvale.

412-708-8844.

412-661-2480.

SCOTTISH COUNTRY HERO DOGS OF WESTERN DANCING. Lessons 7-8 p.m., PENNSYLVANIA. Discover social dancing follows. No partner the history of combat canines & needed. Mon, 7 p.m. and Sat, meet dogs from local certified 7 p.m. Grace Episcopal Church,

FULL LIST ONLINE

SUN 04

therapy & service organizations.

11 a.m.-2 p.m. Senator John Heinz History Center, Strip District.

412-454-6000.

MANCHESTER HOUSE & GARDEN TOUR. Starts on the 1300 block of Page St., North Side. http://manchesterhistoricsocietypa. com/ 11 a.m.-5 p.m.

RIVERS OF STEEL SUNDAY HERITAGE MARKET. Farm & artist market. First Sun of every month and Third Sun of every month. Thru Sept. 15 Homestead Pump House, Munhall.

412-464-4020.

STOOLBALL GAMES. Re-enactments of the 18th century game of stoolball, forerunner of modern baseball. 1-4 p.m.

Woodville Plantation, Bridgeville.

412-221-0348.

VERONA’S CREATIVE MARKETPLACE. Arts & crafts vendors, live music, more.

First Sun of every month, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Thru Aug. 4 Verona Borough Building, Verona.

412-828-8080.

WISHCRAFT: HOW TO GET WHAT YOU REALLY WANT. Support group for life goals.

Sun, 1-2 p.m. Carnegie Library, Squirrel Hill. 412-371-1707.

MON 05 MORNING SPANISH LITERATURE & CONVERSATION. Mon, 10 a.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon.

412-531-1912.

REMEMBERING HIROSHIMA, IMAGINING PEACE. Presentation on the dangers of both nuclear weapons & nuclear energy as well as a Skype exchange w/ peace activists in Japan. rememberinghiroshima. wordpress.com 7:30 p.m. Friends Meeting House, Oakland.

412-683-2669.

SCOTTISH COUNTRY DANCING. Lessons 7-8 p.m., social dancing follows. No partner needed. Mon, 7 p.m. and Sat, 7 p.m. Grace Episcopal Church, Mt. Washington.

412-683-5670.

MON 05 - WED 07 THE ARTFUL GARDEN CRAFT SHOW. Handmade jewelry, paintings, photography, fabric & paper crafts, wood carvings, more. Mon-Sat, 12-4 p.m.

Thru Aug. 17 North Hills Art Center, Ross. 412-364-3622.

TUE 06 EXERCISE AS MEDICINE. Seminar w/ UPMC’s M. Melissa Moon. 11 a.m. The Legacy Theatre, Allison Park.

412-635-8080.

GETTING A JOB W/ A CRIMINAL RECORD. Information session presented by the East Neighborhood Employment Center. 11 a.m.

Bloomfield-Garfield Corp.

Activity Center, Garfield.

412-362-8580.

MT. LEBANON CONVERSATION SALON. Discuss current events

w/ friends & neighbors. For seniors. First Tue of every month, 10 a.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon.

412-531-1912.

WED 07 CRESCENT CIRCUS. Circus duo performing magic tricks, juggling, partner acrobatics, more. 7:30 p.m. Strand Theater, Zelienople. 724-742-0400.

ENGLISH CONVERSATION (ESL). Wed, 10 a.m. Mount Lebanon Public Library, Mt. Lebanon. 412-531-1912.

FARMERS AT PHIPPS. Farmers’ market. Wed, 2:30-6:30 p.m.

Thru Oct. 30 Phipps Conservatory & Botanical Garden, Oakland.

412-622-6914.

INFORMATION SESSION ON FREE SPAY/NEUTER PROGRAM. Hosted by Animal Friends. 6-8 p.m. Carnegie Library, Woods Run, Woods Run. 412-847-7094.

LET’S SPEAK ENGLISH! Practice conversational English.

Wed, 5 p.m. Carnegie Library, Oakland. 412-622-3151.

PITTSBURGH GLASS CENTER SUMMER LECTURE SERIES. Patrick Martin & Corina Tettinger. 6-8 p.m.

Pittsburgh Glass Center, Friendship.

412-365-2145.

AUDITIONS ARCADE COMEDY THEATER. Auditions for improvisers, coaches, musical improvisers, & accompanists for musical improv. Aug. 4. arcadecomedy theater.com/contact/improvauditions/ Downtown.

412-339-0608.

COMTRA THEATRE. Auditions for Monty Python’s Spamalot.

Aug. 3-4. Ages 15+, minor dancing, cold readings & Broadway style song, a capella.

Knowledge of a British accent is a plus. comtraplayers.com Thru Aug. 4. Cranberry.

724-591-8727.

GOTHAM ON STAGE. Auditions for ristretto stiletto.

Aug. 10-11. Men/women age 30-40 & 1 African American bald man, 2-min. comedic monologue. auditions. ristrettostiletto@yahoo.com East Liberty Presbyterian Church, East Liberty. 412-441-3800.

THE HERITAGE PLAYERS. Auditions for Oliver! Aug. 3-4.

Ages 10+, cold readings & song of your choice. www. heritageplayers.org Schoolhouse Art Center, Bethel Park.

412-254-4633.

THE JUNIOR MENDELSSOHN CHOIR OF PITTSBURGH. Fall

[VOLUNTEER OPPORTUNITY]

THE EDUCATION PARTNERSHIP

Ready or not, back-to-school season will quickly be upon us. The West End-based Education Partnership — which provides classroom supplies to disadvantaged schools — needs volunteers to help in its Resource Center throughout the month of August. Tasks include stocking shelves, bagging school supplies and transporting items to cars. Call 412-922-6500 or visit www.theeducation partnership.org.

THE PITTSBURGH SHOW OFFS. A meeting of jugglers & spinners. All levels welcome. Wed, 7:30 p.m. Union Project, Highland Park. 412-363-4550.

SPANISH II. Geared toward those who already have a basic understanding of Spanish & are interested in increasing proficiency. First and Third Wed of every month Carnegie Library, Oakland. 412-622-3151.

TEA CLASS & TASTING. History of tea, steeping techniques, Storing Tea, Health Benefits, more. Tea samples & European cookies will be served. First Wed of every month, 7 p.m.

Margaret’s Fine Imports, Squirrel Hill. 412-422-1606.

URBAN BALLROOM DANCE. 3rd floor. Wed, 6:30-8 p.m.

Hosanna House, Wilkinsburg.

412-242-4345.

WEST COAST SWING WEDNESDAYS. Swing dance lessons. Wed, 9 p.m. The Library, South Side. 916-287-1373.

N E W S

auditions for talented 8th grade-12th grade singers for the 2013 season.

Aug. 26-27. Email or call MaryColleen. mcseip@ themendelssohn.org. Westminster Presbyterian Church, Upper St. Clair. 724-263-5259.

MCCAFFERY MYSTERIES. Ongoing auditions for actors ages 18+ for murder mystery shows performed in the Pittsburgh area. 412-833-5056.

MCG JAZZ. Auditions for a 2-show live concert appearance at MCG Jazz. July 1-Aug. 1.

Young male jazz vocalists, ages 18-35. Submit video online via YouTube, email to kfriedson@mcg-btc.org, or send a DVD. Details at http:// mcgjazz.org/_wp/mcg-jazzsearching-for-the-next-jazzsuperstar. 412-322-0800.

THE MENDELSSOHN CHOIR OF PITTSBURGH. Fall auditions for all voice parts. Aug. 14-15.

Those interested in scheduling

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an audition should review the audition criteria at www. themendelssohn.org. Email MaryColleen at mcseip@ themendelssohn.org or call. Third Presbyterian Church, Oakland.

724-263-5259.

MON RIVER ARTS. Auditions for The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee. Aug. 10.

Ages 16+, cold readings & contemporary musical theater number. Call for appointment. monriverarts.org/ Grand Theatre, Elizabeth. 412-384-0504.

SCAREHOUSE. Auditions for The Basement. Aug. 3 & 6.

Non-equity roles, call for more information. scarehoue.com.

The ScareHouse, Etna.

412-781-5885.

SUBMISSIONS BLAST FURNACE. Seeking submissions for Volume 3, Issue 3. Theme is “prized possessions,” tangible or otherwise. Submit no more than 3 of your best poems. blastfurnace.submittable.com/ Submit THE DAP CO-OP. Seeking performers & artists to participate in First Fridays Art in a Box. For more information, email thedapcoopzumba@ hotmail.com. 412-403-7357.

GREENSBURG ART CENTER. Seeking non-traditional 2-D & 3-D work for upcoming juried art exhibit Different Dimensions: The Unpainting Exhibit. CD submissions only. Prospectus at www.greensburgartcenter.org/.

724-837-6791.

INDEPENDENT FILM NIGHT. Submit your film, 10 minutes or less. Screenings held on the second Thursday of every month. DV8 Espresso Bar & Gallery, Greensburg.

724-219-0804.

THE NEW YINZER. Online magazine seeking book reviewers, writers & artists to submit original essays, fiction, poetry, artwork, & photographs as well as pitched ideas for possible contributions. Visit www. newyinzer.com for current issue.

Email all submissions/inquiries to newyinzer@gmail.com.

THE POET BAND COMPANY. Seeking various types of poetry. Contact wewuvpoetry@ hotmail.com WESTMORELAND M USEUM OF AMERICAN ART. Seeking individual artists & artist groups for month-long exhibitions in a new transitional gallery measuring. Artists will be responsible for all aspects of their exhibition.

Send images & a brief introduction to the work to: bljones@ wmuseumaa.org w/ a cc: to jotoole@wmuseumaa.org & jmcgarry@wmuseumaa.org.

Greensburg. 724-837-1500.

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

Savage Love {BY DAN SAVAGE}

I am a 28-year-old gay man. I recently connected with a guy on a vanilla dating website, and we are quickly developing a real interest in each other. Our first conversation was through text messages for the better part of six hours. He stated that he is into “everything from mild to wild.”

The comment came during a conversation that he initiated about sexual preferences.

This was a major turn-on for me: I’ve had limited experience with BDSM, but I am looking to try more. I am very familiar with one kink: diapers. It’s a huge part of my sexual identity, and I ideally want it to be part of a sex life with my partner.

Normally I would wait until months into a new relationship to bring up the topic, but since he opened the door, should I talk about it now?

NERVOUSLY ANTICIPATING PADDED PANTS IN EROTIC SITUATIONS

I’ve long advised kinksters who are dating vanillas — or presumed vanillas (PVs), I should say, as it’s not uncommon for presumed-to-be-vanilla partners to reveal kinks of their own after their partners disclose their kinks — to wait until the PV has gotten to know them before disclosing. (Of course, every kinkster is a PV until the moment of disclosure.) Since so many true vanillas have a knee-jerk, negative reaction to kinks, it’s only fair that kinksters have a chance to let a new partner get to know them before opening up. That way, a vanilla can weigh any prejudices they might have about kinky people against what they’ve come to know (and like) about the kinkster they’ve been dating.

But your case is different, NAPPIES, as the gentleman you’re courting has already disclosed his kinks. According to my treasured and frequently consulted copy of Emily Post’s Etiquette, the proper response to a disclosure of kinks by a suitor is the prompt disclosure of one’s own kinks.

Now, very few people who say they’re into “everything” are actually into every single thing. A Google search for “toaster fetish” pulls up 260,000 results. Some are pages created by kitchen-appliance aficionados, but some are created by actual toaster pervs. And just as your new boyfriend probably wasn’t thinking “even toasters!” when he said “everything,” he probably wasn’t thinking “even diapers!” Because while diapers are a huge turn-on for diaper fetishists, they’re not something that leaps to mind when even a kinky person says “from mild to wild.”

As Emily Post put it: “A sexual fetish for an item of attire so strongly associated with childhood (indeed, with the nursery itself!) will give pause to even the most depraved of suitors.” As such, you may be within your rights to drop hints about your diaper fetish instead of flat-out disclosing it. Ask him if he really meant everything. If he says, “Yes, everything,” then spill — or leak — your kink. But if he hedges, let him get to know you a bit better and explore some of his kinks, before disclosing your own.

I’m a sexually inactive (by my own choice) heterosexual female in my late 40s who up until recently used to be much heavier and in declining health. Since my type 2 diabetes diagnosis, I have achieved substantial weight loss, a much-improved diet and a little Clairol Nice ’n’ Easy. I now look and feel infinitely better than I did in my late 20s. People in my apartment building have been doing double takes.

While I admit the newly acquired positive attention is fun, I’m happy staying single and am not interested in developing any LTRs. The weird thing is, the majority of guys flirting seem to be much younger than I am. An older female friend once commented that men “don’t know what to make” of someone like me. So am I too narcissistic? I can’t seem to relate or keep conversations going. Plenty of younger men in their 20s and 30s are nice-looking, but I’ll be 50 next summer!

I’M NOT A COUGAR THOUGH I’M VERY ENERGIZED

“The first thing I’d like to say to INACTIVE is congratulations on tackling her type 2 diabetes and getting such fabulous results!” says Cindy Gallop, the founder and driving force behind MakeLoveNotPorn.com, a website and movement designed to blow up pornography.

Gallop is a fan of younger men, and younger men are fans of Gallop.

“Of course she’s getting flirtatious attention from younger guys!” says Gallop.

“There are many young men out there interested in and attracted to older women — but society considers that relationship model less socially acceptable than the older-man/younger-woman version, which is why she’s so surprised. The good news is she can stay single and still have a lot of fun with younger men, without worrying about keeping conversations going — because the fun doesn’t need to involve much talking.”

If being sexually inactive was a choice you made back in your heavier, unhealthier days due to a lack of confidence, Gallop says that this is the perfect time to get back in the game — and younger men are the perfect playmates.

“INACTIVE is in her sexual prime, and she should go for it!” says Gallop. “The age issue is purely a societal judgment and is irrelevant.

Younger man (lots of stamina, very short recovery period) + older woman (confidence, experience, knows what she wants) is a fantastic combination. And I speak as someone who knows.”

A couple of pro tips from Gallop for older women dating younger men: “Number one: Apply the same filter to her dates that I do — regardless of how casual the relationship, he needs to be a very nice person. Number two: If she hasn’t been sexually active for a while, check out MakeLoveNotPorn.com. She should be aware of what she may encounter in younger men that’s been learned from porn, and how to talk about what she prefers in that context openly, honestly and lightheartedly.”

A GOOGLE SEARCH FOR “TOASTER FETISH” PULLS UP 260,000 RESULTS.

On this week’s Savage Lovecast: How to be a professional but friendly unicorn. Find it at savagelovecast.com.

SEND IN YOUR QUESTIONS TO MAIL@SAVAGELOVE.NET AND FIND THE SAVAGE LOVECAST (DAN’S WEEKLY PODCAST) AT THESTRANGER.COM/SAVAGE

FOR THE WEEK OF

Free Will Astrology

07.31-08.07

{BY ROB BREZSNY}

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Sergei Diaghilev was a Russian ballet impresario who founded Ballets Russes, one of the 20th century’s great ballet companies. At one point in his career he met French playwright Jean Cocteau. Diaghilev dared Cocteau to write a piece for a future Ballets Russes production. “Astonish me!” he said.

It took seven years, but Cocteau met the challenge. He created Parade, a ballet that also featured music by Eric Satie and sets by Pablo Picasso. Now let’s pretend I’m Diaghilev and you’re Cocteau. Imagine that I’ve just told you, “Astonish me!” How will you respond? What surprising beauty will you come up with? What marvels will you unleash?

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Since 1948, the chemical known as warfarin has been used as a pesticide to poison rats. Beginning in 1954, it also became a medicine prescribed to treat thrombosis and other blood ailments in humans. Is there anything in your own life that resembles warfarin? A person or an asset or an activity that can either be destructive or constructive, depending on the situation? The time will soon be right for you to employ that metaphorical version of warfarin in both capacities. Make sure you’re very clear about which is which.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “My heart was a hysterical, unreliable organ,” wrote Vladimir Nabokov in his novel Lolita. We have all gone through phases when we could have uttered a similar statement. But I doubt that this is one of those times for you, Libra. On the contrary. I suspect your heart is very smart right now — poised and lucid and gracious. In fact, I suggest you regard the messages coming from your heart as more trustwor-

thy than any other part of you — wiser than your head and your gut and your genitals put together.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The Holy Grail of skateboarding tricks is called the 1080. To pull it off, a skateboarder has to do three complete 360-degree revolutions in mid-air and land cleanly. No one had ever pulled it off until 12-year-old Tom Schaar did it in 2012. Since then, two other teenage boys have managed the same feat. But I predict that a Scorpio skateboarder will break the record sometime soon, managing a 1260, or three and a half full revolutions. Why? First, because your tribe is unusually geared to accomplish peak performances right now. And second, you have a knack for doing complex maneuvers that require a lot of concentration.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Can you think of ways that you have been colonized? Have any powerful institutions filled up your brain with ideas and desires that aren’t in alignment

with your highest values? For instance, has your imagination gotten imprinted with conditioning that makes you worry that your body’s not beautiful enough or your bank account’s not big enough or your style isn’t cool enough? If so, Sagittarius, the coming weeks will be an excellent time to get uncolonized. There has rarely been a better time than now to purge any brainwashing that puts you at odds with your deepest self.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): An old Chinese poem tells us that “the true measure of a mountain’s greatness is not its height but whether it is charming enough to attract dragons.” You and I know there are no such things as dragons, so we can’t take this literally. But what if we treat it as we might a fairy tale? I suggest we draw a metaphorical meaning from it and apply it to your life. Let’s say that you shouldn’t be impressed with how big and strong anything is; you shouldn’t give your mojo to people or institutions simply because they have worldly power. Rather, you will be best served by aligning yourself with what’s mysterious and fabulous. You’re more likely to have fun and generate good fortune for yourself by seeking out stories that appeal to your soul instead of your ego.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): The questions you have been asking aren’t terrible.

But they could be formulated better. They might be framed in such a way as to encourage life to give you crisp insights you can really use rather than what you’ve been getting lately, which are fuzzy conjectures that are only partially relevant. Would you like some inspiration? See if any of these inquiries help hone your spirit of inquiry. (1) What kind of teacher or teaching do you need the most right now? (2) What part of you is too tame, and what can you do about it? (3) What could you do to make yourself even more attractive and interesting to people than you already are? (4) What is the pain that potentially has the most power to awaken your dormant intelligence?

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “There are some enterprises in which a careful disorderliness is the true method.” So says Ishmael, the hero of Herman Melville’s 19th-century novel Moby Dick. He is ostensibly referring to whale hunting, which is his job, but some modern critics suggest he’s also talking about the art of storytelling. I suspect his statement applies to a certain enterprise you are currently engaged in, as well. Can you wrap your mind and heart around the phrase “careful disorderliness,” Pisces? I hope so, because I think it’s the true method. Here are some other terms to describe it: benevolent chaos; strategic messiness; purposeful improvisation; playful experiments.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): To add zest to mealtime, you might choose food that has been seasoned with red chili peppers, cumin or other piquant flavors. Some chimpanzees have a similar inclination, which is why they like to snack on red fire ants. Judging from the astrological omens, I’m guessing you are currently in a phase when your attraction to spicy things is at a peak — not just for dinner but in other areas of your life, as well. I have a suggestion: Pursue rowdy fun with adventures that have metaphorical resemblances to red chili peppers, but stay away from those that are like red fire ants.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20):

The 19th-century English artist John Constable specialized in painting landscapes. The countryside near his home especially excited him. He said, “The sound of water escaping from mill dams, willows, old rotten planks, slimy posts and brickwork, I love such things. They made me a painter, and I am grateful.” Take a cue from Constable, Taurus. Spend quality time appreciating the simple scenes and earthy pleasures that nourish your creative spirit.

Give your senses the joy of getting filled up with vivid impressions. Immerse yourself in experiences that thrill your animal intelligence.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): This is Grand Unification Week for you Geminis. If your left hand has been at war with your right hand, it’s a perfect moment to declare a truce. If your head and heart have not been seeing eye to eye, they are ready to find common ground and start conspiring together for your greater glory. Are there any rips or rifts in your life? You will generate good fortune for yourself if you get to work on healing them. Have you been alienated from an ally or at odds with a beloved dream or separated from a valuable resource? You have a lot of power to fix glitches like those.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): In an episode of the TV show Twin Peaks, special agent Dale Cooper gives the following advice to his colleague Harry: “I’m going to let you in on a little secret. Every day, once a day, give yourself a present.

Don’t plan it, don’t wait for it, just let it happen.”

Now I’m passing on this advice to you, Cancerian. It’s a perfect time for you to try out this fun game. You are in a phase of your astrological cycle when you’ll be wise to intensify your commitment to self-care … and deepen your devotion to making yourself feel good … and increase your artistry at providing yourself with everything you need to thrive.

Compose a love spell to get more of the intimate connection you want, but without manipulating anyone’s free will. Tell me about it at Freewillastrology.com.

GO TO REALASTROLOGY.COM TO CHECK OUT ROB BREZSNY’S EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES AND DAILY TEXT-MESSAGE HOROSCOPES. THE AUDIO HOROSCOPES ARE ALSO AVAILABLE BY PHONE AT 1-877-873-4888 OR 1-900-950-7700

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

FOR INFORMATION ON HOW TO PLACE A CLASSIFIEDS ADVERTISEMENT, CALL 412.316.3342 EXT. 189

WORK 49 + STUDIES 51 + SERVICES 52 + WELLNESS 53 + LIVE 54

WORK

Spokesmodel

HELP WANTED

HELP WANTED

$$$HELP WANTED$$$ Extra Income! Assembling CD cases from Home! No Experience Necessary! Call our Live Operators Now! 1-800405-7619 EXT 2450 http://www.easyworkgreatpay.com (AAN CAN)

Help Wanted! make extra money in our free ever popular homemailer program, includes valuable guidebook! Start immediately! Genuine!

1-888-292-1120 www. easywork-fromhome. com (AAN CAN)

Call 412.316.3342 to advertise in City Paper.

Paid In Advance!

MAKE up to $1000 A WEEK mailing brochures from home!

Helping Home Workers since 2001! Genuine Opportunity! No Experience required. Start Immediately! www.mailing-station. com (AAN CAN)

WANTED! 36 PEOPLE to Lose Weight. 30-day money back guarantee. Herbal Program.

Also opportunity to earn up to $1,000 monthly. 1-800-492-4437

National Promotional agency is seeking Spokesmodels to conduct promotions for a leading tobacco product within nightlife and retail establishments in Pittsburgh and surrounding areas. This part time position is ideal for attractive, outgoing young men and women who are looking for an interesting, challenging position within the nightlife and retail scene that will allow them to make good money and have fun.

Position Requirements: • 20 – 25 hours of daytime and/ or evening availability over 3 – 7 days per week.

• Clean neat appearance and outgoing personality excellent verbal and people skills • Prior Face-to-Face Promotional Experience preferred • MUST be at least 21 years old Responses can be sent to HR@MSPromotions.com and must include resume, references and comp card/recent photo.

CONSTRUCTION Carpenter Wanted for carpentry work, Drivers license required.

412-488-2811

Your ad

ARMOR SECURITY TRAINING INSTITUTE

could

Steel City Media is seeking F/T A.E. FOR WRRK and WLTJ radio. 2 yrs min. sales experience, possess excellent verbal skills & a self-starter. Requires own vehicle and auto insurance.

Act 235 Courses September 14,15 and 26-28 Renewal Classes: September 26th

be here

www.healthnutrition pittsburgh.com

Submit resume or email: Steel City Media, Attn: Chris Kohan, 650 Smithfield Street, Suite # 2200. PGH., PA 15222 or c.kohan@steelcitymedia.com No phone calls please. EOE.

www.lethalweapons.state.pa.us

RESTAURANT

State Police Approval Letter Required 724-728-8029 3645 Brodhead Rd Monaca, PA 15061

Now Hiring

ALL POSITIONS Apply In Person 125 W.Station Square Drive

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE WANTED!

Have You Always Wanted to Work For

We are NOW HIRING for the position of Classified Advertising Representative. Previous inside sales/ customer service experience is preferred. Pittsburgh City Paper offers a competitive wage and incentive package, medical + 401K. If you are looking for a challenging and rewarding career opportunity please forward resume to Andrea James.

E-mail: andreaj@steelcitymedia.com Fax: 412-316-3388 Steel City Media

412.316.3342

Registration Necessary THREE WEEKS Prior to the First Day of Class

If the answer is YES then we have a position for you!!!

Classified Advertising Manager Pittsburgh City Paper 650 Smithfield Street, Suite 2200 Pittsburgh, Pa. 15222 Pittsburgh City Paper is an equal opportunity employer. mployer.

DISCLAIMER: ALTHOUGH MOST ADVERTISING IN PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER ARE LEGITIMATE BUSINESSES, PRIOR TO INVESTING MONEY OR USING A SERVICE LOCATED WITHIN ANY SECTION OF THE CLASSIFIEDS WE SUGGEST THE FOLLOWING PROCEDURE: ASK FOR REFERENCES & BUSINESS LICENSE NUMBER, OR CALL/WRITE: THE BETTER BUSINESS BUREAU AT 412-456-2700 / 300 SIXTH AVE., STE 100-UL / PITTSBURGH, PA 15222. REMEMBER: IF IT SOUNDS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE, IT USUALLY IS! N E W S

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PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

STUDIES CLINICAL STUDIES Looking to hire a qualified employee?

Don’t waste time, call 412.316.3342 to place an Employment Classified ad in Pittsburgh City Paper.

VAGINAL DRYNESS

People with Current Cold Sore or Canker Sore needed for a Research study

CLINICAL STUDIES

(UPMC Oakland) This study of Herpes Simplex Virus-1 and Cognition is looking for individuals who experience cold sores, canker sores or other oral lesions.

ENDOMETRIOSIS? CALL TODAY!

Participation involves 2 visits each lasting 1.5-2 hours and the completion of cognitive assessments, donation of a blood sample, clinic assessment of the cold sore, a health and wellbeing survey, and a brief medical history questionnaire. You will be asked to complete these procedures twice, on two separate visits, three weeks apart.

412.363.1900 CTRS

HIGH CHOLESTEROL

CALL TODAY!

412.363.1900 CTRS

Follow us on

CALL TODAY!

412.363.1900 CTRS

Participants will be reimbursed $50 for each visit, for a total of $100.

See what our clients are saying

Willing participants will also be asked to complete a magnetic resonance imaging scan (MRI) and further cognitive assessments. Participants will be reimbursed $100 for this portion of the study.

been very In the past two years, I’ve ads and our of ign des the satisfied with both n I know I have Whe ke. evo they e ons the resp subjects in the 24-35 to advertise for research k of using the City age group, I immediately thin Paper.

For more information, please call 412-246-6367

— Mary Beth Tedesco, CRNP, University of Pittsburgh

@PGHCityPaper

! ! !

R E M M U S H CAS IN ON

Novum Pharmaceutical Research Services, one of the leading research companies in the testing of generic medications, has a GREAT OPPORTUNITY FOR YOU to earn up to $600 just by participating in our Outpatient Research Study!

YOU MAY BE ELIGIBLE TO PARTICIPATE IF YOU ARE: • At least 18 years of age • In general good health • Drug-Free • Willing to make short visits to our facility (no overnight stays)

CALL OUR RECRUITING DEPARTMENT TODAY AT

1.800.586.0365

5900 Penn Avenue // Pittsburgh, PA 15206

Learn more at www.GoNovum.com N E W S

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SERVICES ANNOUNCEMENTS Become a friend of Gordon Shoes on Facebook for your chance to win great prizes and merchandise!

Facebook.com/GordonShoes CASH FOR CARS: Any Car/Truck. Running or Not! Top Dollar Paid.

We Come To You! Call For Instant Offer: 1-888-420-3808 www. cash4car.com (AAN CAN) NAMASTE! Find a healthy balance of the mind, body and spirit with one of our massage therapists, yoga, or spa businesses!

Advertise your business or product in alternative papers across the U.S. for just $995/ week. New advertiser discount “Buy 3 Weeks, Get 1 Free” www. altweeklies.com/ads (AAN CAN)

ANNOUNCEMENTS REDUCE YOUR CABLE BILL! A whole-home Satellite system installed at NO COST. Programming starting at $19.99/mo. New Callers receive FREE HD/DVR upgrade!

CALL: 1-877-342-0363 (AAN CAN) Get the most for your money in CP Classifieds. We get great results. Call 412.316.3342

ADOPTION UNPLANNED PREGNANCY? THINKING OF ADOPTION? Open or closed adoption.

YOU choose the family.

LIVING EXPENSES PAID. Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions. Call 24/7.

866-413-6293. Void in Illinois/New Mexico/ Indiana (AAN CAN) Call 412.316.3342 to advertise in City Paper.

CLASSES EARN $500 A DAY. Airbrush & Media Makeup Artists For: Ads - TV - Film Fashion Train & Build Portfolio in 1 week. Lower Tuition for 2013. www.AwardMakeupSchool.com (AAN CAN) AIRLINE CAREERS begin here – Get trained as FAA certified Aviation Technician.

Housing and Financial aid for qualified students. Job placement assistance. Call Aviation Institute of Maintenance 877-492-3059 (AAN CAN)

REHEARSAL Rehearsal Space starting @ $150/mo Many sizes available, no sec deposit, play @ the original and largest practice facility, 24/7 access, 412-403-6069

BUY and SELL your HOME all in the Same Place!

Advertise here in the “LIVE” section of the City Paper

Find your next place to “WORK” in City Paper!

Need N eed a Lawyer?

Lawye yer? r?

Meet M eet Bob! Bob! SPECIALIZES IN: Criminal Defense, Civil Litigation, Personal Injury and more!

Call for a FREE CONSULTATION. Law Offices of

Robert Goldman

412-531-6879

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

{BY BEN TAUSIG}

ACROSS

Pittsburgh Lawyers

52

Ink Well

POP MUZIK

1. Summer clothing portmanteau 6. Certain ski lift 10. Symbol first used on “Led Zeppelin IV” 14. Big-eyed cartoon style 15. Three less than once 16. Certain Jewish community center 17. Surrealist hip-hop collaboration?

19. Pussy ___ 20. Dir. from Piglet’s House to Pooh Bear’s House 21. Dynasty before China became a republic 22. States 24. Dog days month: Abbr.

25. Phrase atop a lawyer’s letter 26. “Cop Killer” rapper at the beach in Montauk?

33. “Miami Vice”-era muscle car 34. Be temporarily 35. Atlantic City casino, casually 37. Showing a lot 38. 2011 cartoon movie with a planned 2014 sequel 39. ___ ghanoush (smoky eggplant dish) 40. Popular Reddit section, briefly 41. Lacks 43. With a spring in one’s step 44. Unpigmented Damon Albarn band?

47. Romney ticket-mate 48. Illinois or Oriental, briefly, in Monopoly 49. Update, as machinery 52. Nigerian-born “Smooth Operator” singer 54. Reed of heroininspired pop 57. State in which Obama didn’t even think about campaigning in 2012 58. Cowardly nü-metal group?

61. Nude relative 62. Minos’s dad 63. Felt unwell 64. Bed, across the pond 65. Puppet in Kevin Clash’s autobiography “My Life as a Furry Red Monster” 66. Band whose “Only You” was featured in “Napoleon Dynamite”

DOWN 1. Stone sometimes made of nephrite 2. God killed him but not specifically because he spilled his “seed,” though that was also bad 3. Antagonize 4. “Your trip to the free clinic isn’t interesting to me, dude” 5. Cosmo staple 6. Become part of, as a cult 7. Fashion Week brand 8. Big Polynesian fish 9. U.S. Capitol

Building area 10. Brand-name allergy drug 11. Baby’s boo-boo 12. Restaurateur and celebrity hanger-on Toots 13. Stable diet?

18. Moves sharply one way 23. Early Baseball Hall of Fame inductee Speaker 24. Govt. bureau 25. All told 26. Turkey dough 27. Commercial name suffix 28. Very, very lite 29. Cartoonist Gary who retired in 1995 30. Breezing through, as a test 31. Sell on site?

32. Zakir Hussain’s drum

36. Net man?

39. Bound hay 41. Word that the Lone Ranger says to Silver 42. Break down 43. Collapse 45. Embrace with minimal contact 46. Fancy Swiss watch company 49. Parisian streets 50. Use acid, in a way 51. Reid of “Sharknado” 52. ___ tourism 53. “Oh, and ...”

54. Kicks, on the Internet 55. Cookie owned by the same company as Chips Ahoy!

56. Take back, as a command 59. Electric predator 60. Sorento maker

{LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS}

WELLNESS HEALTH AND WELLNESS Sneakers not meant to be in the box. New Balance Pittsburgh.

Oakland & Waterfront. www.lifestyleshoe.com Advertise Here Today!

Massage by Donna Mature gentlemen by appointment.

412-758-5250

Phoenix Spa New Young Professional Free Table Shower w/60 min.

Open 10-10 Daily 4309 Butler Street (Lawrenceville)

412-621-3300

MIND & BODY

GRAND OPENING!!!

Best of the Best in Town!

420 W. Market St., Warren, OH 44481 76 West, 11 North, 82 West to Market St. 6 lights and make a left.

1/4 mile on the left hand side.

(1st Floor)

massage Therapy

330-373-0303

BAD BACK OR NECK PAIN?

Trigger point Deep tissue Swedish Reflexology BLOOMFIELD 412.683.2328 Xie LiHong’s WELLNESS CENTER

3225 W. Liberty Ave. • Dormont

Free Table Shower w/60min Open 10-10 Daily

724-519-7896

TIGER SPA

Open 9am-12 midnight 7 days a week!

Licensed Professionals Dry Sauna, Table Shower, Deep Tissue, Swedish

Superior Chinese Massage

1788 Golden Mile Hwy Monroeville, PA 15146 Call for more information

Call 412.316.3342 to advertise in City Paper.

DOWNTOWN 322 Fourth Ave.

Walk-Ins Welcome 412-561-1104

$50/HR Free Table Shower

Find a new place to “LIVE” in City Paper!

412-401-4110 $40/hr

STAR

China Massage

MIND & BODY

Zhangs Wellness Center

Chinese Bodyworks

1310 E. Carson St. 412-488-3951

MIND & BODY

YOUR AD COULD BE IN

THIS SPACE! call 412.316.3342

Call Today to Advertise Your Business in Pittsburgh City Paper!

Credit Cards Accepted

GRAND OPENING!

Therapeutic Massage Therapy Relief is just a call away.

Our licensed professional staff can assist with Fibromyalgia, Circulation, Low Back Pain, Muscle Spasms.

Aming’s Massage Therapy

FULL BODY MASSAGE $40/hr

TWO LOCATIONS 1190 Washington Pike, Bridgeville

Shadyside Location

412-441-1185

Now with Vichy Shower 4125 William Penn Hwy, Murrysville, PA 15668

(across from Eat n’ Park)

Across the street from Howard Hanna’s

412-319-7530 (in Hillcrest Shopping Center)

724-519-2950

412-595-8077

Accepting All Major Cards

4972 Library Road, Bethel Park

Xin Sui Bodyworks Grand Opening

$49.99/ hour Free Vichy Shower with 1HR or more body work (Body shower and Body Scrub) Essential Oil used at no extra charge 2539 Monroeville Blvd Ste 200 Monroeville, Pa 15146 Next to Twin Fountain Plaza 412-335-6111

412-316-3342

N E W S

Judy’s Oriental Massage Appointments & Walk-ins are both welcome 10am to 10pm

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SUBOXONE TREATMENT Caring Help for Opiate Addiction

• Experienced, caring therapy and medical staff.

• Private, professional setting.

• Downtown office near public transportation and parking.

• Medication by prescription coverage or self-pay.

Immediate openings including pregnant opiate-dependent women. We accept Highmark, Fayette & Westmoreland County Medicaid (VBH) and self-paying clients.

412.246.8965, ext. 9

LIVE

STORAGE

REAL ESTATE SERVICES

REAL ESTATE SERVICES

20 ACRES FREE! Own 60 acres for 40 acre price/payment. $0 down, $198/month.

Money back guarantee, no credit checks.

Beautiful views, West Texas.

1-800-843-7537 www.

TexasLandBuys.com (AAN CAN)

ALL AREAS - ROOMMATES.COM. Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: http:// www.Roommates.com.

(AAN CAN) Find a new place to “LIVE” in City Paper!

ABC SELF STORAGE25 x 60 storage or workspace $500 plus taxes, 12.5x40 $250 plus taxes. (2) locations Mckees Rocks & South Side. 412-403-6069

EAST FOR RENT Point Breeze Townhouse with grg 2 BR, 1.5 BA, C/A, Dishwasher, Laund, HW Floors $1295 412-393-9910

EAST FOR RENT SQ. HILL- 2BR hse, renov. bath & kitch, fresh paint, wood flrs, w/d, gar, $1,295+ 703899-5246 Pics www. skrents.com Looking to fill an open position? Advertise in City Paper’s “WORK” section and reach over 250,000 people who read CP classifieds!

Call 412.316.3342 to advertise in City Paper.

SOUTH FOR SALE South Side Slopes2624 Mission, 3 BRs, 2.5 baths, views, total remodel with six (6) parking spaces! $239,900 412-352-3417

EAST FOR SALE Bloomfield- 4814 Sciota, 3 BRs, 1.5 baths, near Liberty & Millvale Avenues, large garage, fenced yard. $219,000 412-352-3417

HOUSES FOR SALE

Montour School District $239,900— Kennedy Twp. Gorgeous 4-BR, 1.5 BA, log Cabin. Located in a very private setting. Comes with 3 extra lots. 25+ acres.

Completely updated.

MUST SEE. Call George E. Lucas! 412-771-8400

HOUSES FOR SALE

JADE

NOW IN SQUIRREL HILL! Specializing in hand blown water and glass pipes and incense.

J&S GLASS

Wellness Center

Premiere Outpatient Drug and Alcohol Treatment

Water Pipes And Glass W lass las For All Your Smoking Needs

Family Owned and Operated Treating: Alcohol, Opiates, Heroin and More

• SUBOXONE • VIVITROL

Pittsburgh’s Premier Smoke Shop 1918 Murray Ave 412-422-6361 or 561-665-0592 Student Discount w/valid ID Public Parking Located behind bldg FOR TOBACCO USE ONLY

- a new once a month injection for alcohol and opiate dependency

• Group and Individualized Therapy • NOW Treating Pregnant Women

NO WAIT LIST Accepts all major insurances and medical assistance

MONROEVILLE, PA

412-380-0100

The numbers don’t lie!

How many people actually READ the classifieds? Check it out!

CP 252,391 Trib Classifieds 65,075 PG Classifieds 60,463 City Paper has more eyes on the prize than other publications in the market!

Advertise TODAY!

www.myjadewellness.com

Suboxone Services Pittsburgh- 412-281-1521 Beaver- 724-448-9116 54

PITTSBURGH CITY PAPER 07.31/08.07.2013

FANTASTIC HOME! $249,900 South Fayette, GorgeousOne year young, stone & vinyl, bi-level home, located in a great school district. Features large BRs, 2 full BA’s, lovely eat-in kitchen and game room. Beautiful bamboo hardwood floor w/carpet and tile.

Must see! Call George E. Lucas Today!

412-771-8400

Sq. Hill- 6364 Caton.

Beaut. 3BR brick.

Fresh paint, Powder room 1st floor, formal DR, E-I-K, bay window in LR, finished gameroom, Integral gar, Covered side/front porches. $235,900 Phil 412-337-9494

Special Price! $174,900— Kennedy Twp. Gorgeous— 2-story, brick, 4 bedroom, 1.5 bath home with formal dining room. Lovely game room and a huge level lot. Convenient location, walk to bank, restaurants, drugstores and shopping. Call George E. Lucas today!

412-771-8400

get your yoga on!

I CAUGHT CHRIST

{BY JIMMY CVETIC}

Defining moments and milestones That is the Ode to Joy Ode to Joy …

I was an altar boy at St. Lawrence O’Toole And proud as a rooster in my cassock And this was in the days of Latin Mass Nuns swishing rosary beads And drunks singing loud and off-key Smell of cheap wine Smell of incense And the long dry sermons of Priests Who would babble on and on about sins of the flesh and Guess I was too young to understand any sins of the flesh Except having the woo for Mary Sweeny who was Cute as patent leather shoes And I guess that weren’t really a sin Because all the boys had the woo for Mary Sweeny.

I remember as if it were yesterday Some would call it fate or Some call it chance But sometimes the stars line up and I was serving mass for Monsignor Campbell Who was older than the Bible And his Mass was longer than A slow rosary prayed by an old nun on A hot summer day …

Anyway, I was assigned to carry the paten As Monsignor distributed the Eucharist to all sinners that Wanted the body of Christ on their fat tongues.

I actually loved holding the gold paten Under the fat chins And watched them put their tongues out And I know I’m not supposed to think like this I always wanted to whack a couple of those transgressors Right in the throat with the gold paten as they were gaping like Baby robins wanting to be fed with holiness.

I knew most of them from the neighborhood And I knew some of them beat their wives and kids And I knew a couple were falling-down drunks And a couple of them probably ate meat on Fridays And were probably responsible for the nails in the hands and feet of Christ The fakers The frauds Shams Phonies

But it was always the same They’d walk up and kneel down And wait for the consecrated bread to be placed on the tongue Those without sin Holy and pure And I’d think right Right Right Sure Sure Sure …

And always the same Monsignor would place the Body of Christ But one time the stars did line up And I already told you, call it fate or chance Monsignor accidentally hit some fat woman on her fat lip And missed her fat tongue And dropped the host.

And I felt like Willie Mays I saw the white host falling almost in slow motion And holding my ground And bing-bang I caught the Body of Christ.

It landed in the middle of my paten And everything became more holy Like a Gregorian Chant inside my head My heart was pounding like the church organ I caught Christ I caught Christ My God My God I fell to one knee I caught Christ And a tear fell from my eye and I looked up at the stained glass window of Saint Michael Slaying a dragon And knew I was blessed And as I stood up I saw the rear end of Mary Sweeny And just knew everything would always be all right.

INF O@ P G H C I T Y PA P E R. C OM

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SUMMER IS IN THE AIR! OUTDOOR AMPHITHEATER CONCERTS Shows starting at 7PM NEW DATE!

WED AUG 21

JIMMY BUFFETT TRIBUTE (BEACH BUMZ) & BEACH BOYS TRIBUTE (BEACH PARTY BOYS)

SUN SEPT 1

EARTH WIND AND FIRE TRIBUTE (SHINING STAR) & MICHAEL JACKSON TRIBUTE (BEAT IT)

Visit RIVERSCASINO.COM or call 412-231-7777 for more upcoming shows.

SLOTS | TABLE GAMES | DINING | NIGHTLIFE 777 CASINO DRIVE, PITTSBURGH NEXT TO HEINZ FIELD RIVERSCASINO.COM

GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER. MUST BE 21 YEARS OR OLDER TO BE ON RIVERS CASINO PROPERTY.