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Meet Our COVER STAR: Pets Mag’s Nell, age 16! TOP DOG LISTENER TONY KNIGHT: Tackling Separation Anxiety in Dogs
PET REMEMBRANCE DAY 5th July: e agony of losing a beloved animal & how to cope
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& much more inside!
& MUCH MORE INSIDE
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www.fleasgone.uk
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Meet Cover Star Nell, the Rescue Cavalier
Nell’s Story Nell is an amazing 16-year
Before her new, best life,
the years. Poor Nell, who most
old Cavalier King Charles
started, Nell was incarcerated
likely was nameless for a
on an Irish puppy farm where
decade, was probably kept in
she was forced to have litter
cramped conditions, perhaps
Spaniel, who spent 10 years being used as a breeding
after litter in the name of profit. fed hormones to produce a
machine on an Irish puppy
Vets said she’d had multiple
more regular heat, and be more
farm. She was re-homed
litters, severe ear infections,
‘commercially productive’ for
from Dogs Trust Darlington
most of her teeth had been
her owners. Hers was a life
removed and her muscles were
characterised by the need for
hardly developed due to a
survival.
on 1st August 2016 by our editor Marie Carter-Robb.
complete lack of exercise over
Rescue Nell: Living her best life
Nell is a true survivor and,
them as pets for years. It was
to the Dogs Trust, and I left my
thankfully, has no lasting
quite unusual to see a rescue
details with the admin team on
mental or emotional scars from Cavalier, so I walked over to say the off-chance that Nell’s new her tragic experiences. She
‘hello’. She was shy, but had the home should fall through.
could write a book about the
most beautiful eyes, and a soft
horrors of her life, but, knowing manner. Unfortunately, I
I thought nothing of it and tried
Nell, even if she could put pen
discovered that Nell had
to put Nell to the back of my
to paper, she’d say she’d rather
already been re-homed. I was
mind, until a week and a half
just put it all behind her and
sad, but glad for her at the
later Dogs Trust phoned to say
live in the moment! We could
same time.
Nell’s home had indeed not
all learn something from Nell.
worked out. Her prospective Despite this, I had a niggling
new owners had had a change
I first met Nell at Dogs Trust
feeling that I shouldn’t give up,
of heart and decided that were
Darlington’s annual Fun Dog
and that I might see Nell again.
too old to take on a new dog.
Show. She caught my eye as I
So, I, along with a very
love Cavaliers and have had
understanding husband, drove
My heart leapt!
Marie and Nell
A few complications later and a Since her adoption almost six
pups that were taken away
week after on 1st August, I
from her. Poor Nell, the most
years ago, she’s been on
raced to pick up Nell from Dogs countryside walks, run along
loving dog, was used so badly.
Trust. It was the most
beaches and stayed at pretty
Thankfully, she has now had
wonderful day.
holiday cottages all over the
some joy in her life, and she
UK. She loves life. She was a
loves her cuddles. Sitting next
After coming out of her shell
lovely companion for Sophie,
to her on a sofa, she will lift
over a period of several weeks,
who sadly passed away in April. your arm for a soothing hug.
Nell or ‘Nellie’ was abundant
She is also adoptive mum to
She receives many, many
with her licks, cuddles and
five year old Rufus, who loves
cuddles a day. I just want to
nuzzles. She loves her walks,
her so much. He is regularly to
make up for all the cuddles and
and is inquisitive about the
be found licking and cleaning
kisses she missed over so many
world around her. Her pads
his ‘mum’ and jumps up to
years.
were pink and puppy soft
comfort her if she ever shouts
through lack of walking and I
due to an arthritic twinge.
still call her my ‘grown up
Amazingly, I discovered that Nell’s ‘birthday’ is 1st May
puppy’ because of her need for
Rufus has become the forever
which is also my birthday! It
love and attention and her
son she never had - it’s
seems that Nell and I were
excitement for life.
heartbreaking to think of all the meant to be…
Curing Separation Anxiety in Dogs
Tony Knight, an internationally-acclaimed Dog Listener and
trainer, advises on how to tackle separation anxiety in dogs. Vet
To n y
Knight,
an
internationally-acclaimed Dog Listener and trainer, shares his revolutionary advice on how to tackle separation anxiety in dogs; a problem that has become increasingly common among so-called ‘lockdown pups’.
T
he recent pandemic has had a huge effect on our lives, especially
for any of us who found themselves isolated from everyone else. Humans are pack animals by nature, so it is unsurprising that for company, many people opted to get a lockdown or “Covid pup”. carpet, barking non-stop or
understand why your dog is
Now that the world is starting
destroying the house - a dog
acting like he does, it‘s also way
to reopen and life returns to a
suffering from separation
too easy to make it worse.
new normal, these Covid pups
anxiety is a source of great
are now experiencing a new
distress to everyone concerned. The best way to solve this distressing problem is two-fold:
concept; their humans are going back to work and leaving
It‘s actually quite a common
- Understanding what causes
them at home. This has led to
problem in dogs and if your dog separation anxiety in the first
some problems. Whether
is suffering from it, there is no
place.
howling in desolation, chewing
doubt that you‘re suffering too.
- How the problem can be
your best shoes, peeing on the
And while it‘s often hard to
successfully dealt with.
The solution is very simple and
Actually, this was only one of
The next theory given for the
kind, although it does
the problems but it was the
chewing was that Roxy was
potentially come up against a
most expensive. She would
bored. Her human was advised
barrier in the human mind.
howl and bark non-stop from
to purchase a hollow, rubber
Once we can realise and accept
the time her owner left until
toy that should be filled with
this barrier exists we can push
their return to find a trail of
food; the idea behind this was
past it and give everyone, both
destruction and a dog who was
that now Roxy would have
human and canine, the peace
so distressed that her chest and something to play with and
they all deserve.
stomach were covered in white
food, thus eliminating her
foam from all the saliva she was boredom.
‘The Termite’
I
producing. It would take two hours for her to calm down.
have been a dog trainer
What actually happened was that Roxy did not touch her toy
for over 20 years, and in
Roxy’s human decided to do
that time I have worked
something about it. At first, the would still howl/bark/destroy
at all while she was alone (and
with countless problem dogs,
usual advice from vets and
etc.), only picking the toy up
many with Separation Anxiety.
trainers was followed.
when her human returned.
However, to this day I have
“Calming” drugs had no effect
Reasoning that Roxy didn’t like
never met a dog as extreme in
whatsoever on Roxy, while
the particular colour of the toy,
their behaviour as Roxy, aka ”
attempts to exercise the
a second one was bought,
The Termite”.
problem away was far from
followed by a third, a fourth…
practical. Shar-peis are one of
When you are desperate and
several breeds that do not cope
you do not know why
well in hot weather, mainly due something is happening, you to their shorter noses. Roxy
will try anything.
would barely have made it a kilometre from home on the
In the end, Roxy had eight
hotter days before collapsing in rubber toys to play with. Again, Roxy was a Shar-pei (an
a heap.
she would only play with them
adorable mix of Labrador and
when her human was back
accordian!) who had earned the N.B. The “tired dog is a happy
home.
above nickname due to her
dog” theory does not work. If
talent of chewing through
exercise did lead to good
N.B. Incidentally, this practice
anything made of wood while
behaviour, football players
of leaving food-filled toys was
her human was out at work.
would be angels!
one of the ways that Roxy
reinforced in her mind that she
technique will only take five
supermarket – we won’t be
should carry on with the
seconds and will immediately
long”. Dogs don‘t know what
destruction!
start to have a positive effect.
you are saying. They don‘t know what you are doing. They
Inspiration finally came in
don‘t know if they are ever
desperation; Roxy’s human
going to see you again. Imagine
discovered the Amichien
how shocked you would be if
Bonding. Not only was the
your dog handed you a
reason for Roxy’s behaviour
shopping list of things they
finally explained properly, but
would like you to buy…
an Action Plan was given that
Before we go into the process of
would help Roxy to calm down. putting an end to our dogs
Have you ever noticed that
It took a little time and effort,
distressing behaviour (and start some people when out at the cinema or at a party will be to make often immediate and
but the results were dramatic
dramatic progress), there is a
(insofar as there was no more
barrier we must overcome. This watch, worrying that they have left their dog for 2-3 hours (as barrier exists in the minds of
drama). From being a dog who
constantly looking at their
would start to react from the moment she heard the heels
if their dog are at
Roxy’s human discovered
home checking
Amichien Bonding.
regular basis).
of her human’s work shoes on the
their watches on a They‘ve not yet
floor, she transformed into a
human beings and is actually a
realised that the idea of
dog who would barely raise an
major contributor to the
minutes, hours, or seconds
eyebrow when her human went problem. Ironically it stems
doesn‘t exist for our dogs like it
out of the door. The non-stop
from the best intentions of
does for us.
barking stopped (as witnessed
owners. That thing is known as
by grateful neighbours) and the GUILT.
I will put up my hand and
house was no longer under
admit that the Guilt Fairy has
demolition. Result! Roxy was
Some people feel so guilty at
affected me from time to time,
finally able to relax when her
the thought of leaving their dog however knowing that my dogs
human left the home…
at home that they will say
don’t regard Time in the same
things like - and I have heard
way that we do helps me to feel
Your own dog can benefit from
people use these exact words -
better.
these techniques. The first
“We’re just going to the
Because of the dreaded “Guilt
I’m sure parents will
more, this can happen to your
Fairy”, people feel really bad
understand these feelings -
dog many times a day.
about leaving the dog, and the
worrying when their babies are
first thing they feel compelled
out in the big wide world,
Some dogs pee in the house
to do upon returning home is to feeling angry if they break
when their humans are
make a big fuss of the dog,
curfew, desperation, and when
missing. This is so the territory
which is a completely human
the key finally finds the door,
smells of them in order for the
thing to do. But that is exactly
absolute relief.
rest of the pack to be able to
where the problems are caused.
find their way back. It‘s a
This interaction leads to the
Of course, not all separation
desperately sad thing, made
dog believing it is the leader of
anxiety behaviour is seen as a
worse by the bad reaction it
the pack, and therefore
problem. Many people believe
always creates. For a dog, a
responsible for the survival of its family.
How desperate would any parent be if their baby went missing?
This is why dogs
family is their pack, regardless of species. They use their
howl, mess in the house, chew
that when they come home and
instincts and logic to make
the furniture or even chew
their dog jumps all over them
sense of the world around them
them-selves, trying to deal with and makes a fuss, their dog is
and cope with any problems
the stress of worrying where
“pleased” to see them. A better
they may have. To avoid any of
the ‘toddler’ is.
word to describe the dog‘s
these problematic symptoms,
feelings would be relieved.
we just need to know that they
Chewing releases a natural
can stop worrying about us.
endorphin that helps calm the
If your toddler had been
system down. Once you know
wandering about in the middle
that, you can understand why
of the road and you couldn‘t get take their toll on us too. Some
your dog will chew anything he
out to look after it, and then
dog anxiety is so bad that their
can get his teeth into. Human
they just walked back in, you
owners won‘t even leave the
beings chew gum, comfort eat
would make a bit of a fuss too.
house if the dog is whining.
or bite their fingernails for the
Any person who has
Others have to grab their car
same reason. In some cases the
experienced that kind of worry
keys and rush out of the door to
dog’s stress leads to extreme
knows exactly what dogs are
get in the car, while the dog
destructive behaviour. Roxy
going through. And what's
goes crazy.
was a prime example of this.
Separation anxiety problems
can get in the way. If at any point you feel
The Golden 5 Minute
guilty, remind yourself
Rule
that by implementing
Although this time period is
this process you are
only a general guide (for those
actually being kind to
who suffer from Guilt this may
your dog by taking
seem like an eternity), 5
away a lot of stress.
minutes really isn‘t that long a
So I‘ll start by getting
time, and yet it is usually more
the hardest bit out of
than long enough for your dog
the way first: The most
to calm down. If your dog
effective thing you can
leaves you alone after 30
do when you come
seconds then that is fine, call
home is to pretend your them to you. dog isn’t there, no
Let them enjoy their chill out time
matter what it does to
Some dogs actually grab their owners as they leave because they want to bring them back in the home. They have no hands
get your attention. You wait
absolutely crazy and leap
until it calms down and leaves
around for half an hour (or
you alone, then call it to you.
more in some cases). So you may need to exercise a strong
and they grab with the one part they have!
However, some dogs can go
will and some
Did you feel the sudden jolt
The Good News Now you understand the
of the Guilt Fairy’s wand?
patience, but it will gradually lessen! The other reason that the Golden 5
reason behind your dog‘s separation anxiety, here‘s
This does not mean that we
Minutes is a good thing to do is
the good news - we‘re going to
ignore our dogs forever; you
that if you wait and let the dog
look at what you can do to stop
can be as affectionate was you
calm down it might be the first
it.
like except for the first few
time that it has actually
moments after you are
experienced being calm. Let
straightforward and easy to
reunited. Get this right and you them just enjoy that chill out will remove a huge burden time.
implement in principle. In
from your dog’s shoulders.
WARNING: The solution is
practice though, the Guilt Fairy
Equally, if your dog needs time
(no matter how long or short),
the next move to establish good
to calm down then as you
the pecking order has to be re-
contact.
implement this process
established. So the dog needs to
consistently, you will notice the know where it fits in every
Therefore your comings and
chaotic time gets shorter and
goings are none of its business
single time. If as you walk in
shorter, a sure sign that the dog and the dog stands back
and consequently nothing for it
is getting the right message.
to worry about, and that takes
wagging its tail that is fine.
After a while the dog will start
all the stress off the dog. The
thinking, “Why am I doing
The important thing to think
this?” if it doesn‘t get them the
about here is that your personal
attention they are looking for,
space is being respected. At
When your dog is reassured
because the dog, much like you
first though, practice waiting
that it has not got a job to do
and I, will not continue to do
until the dog has left you alone
that it cannot cope with, then
something that has no
and relaxes before you make
it‘s behaviour will start to
worthwhile reason. Consistency is the key here because when the pack is back
dog is reassured.
change. It should stop whining
The key point about the Golden 5 Minute Rule is that what you are actually doing is showing the dog you are the leader.
and chewing and messing in your house, or any of the other behaviours that were a result of
together after
their separation
every separation
anxiety.
Remember the most important
opportunities to repeat it in a
the results. Better still, with
part of this all is the Golden 5
short timescale, without
this method you get such
Minute Rule. You must ignore
frightening the dog.
phenomenal success that
your dog until he calms down
anybody could do it no matter
before you make any kind of
Guilt is the ultimate saboteur.
what size dog (or person). This
contact; that means no eye
People feel that they really
is great news for children who
contact, no speaking to your
must pay attention to the dog
often find themselves at eye
dog, and no physical contact
as soon as they walk in. But let
level with a dog. Teaching a
(unless you have to ward them
me reassure you, if you can
child to ignore a dog that
off from leaping all over you!).
ignore the feelings of guilt for
approaches them without
Only then should you call them
just a short while, you‘ll be
permission means they get left
to you (rather than approach
amazed at how quickly your
alone much more quickly.
them) to make a fuss and say
dog will
hello.
understand the Golden 5
Using this technique, the dog
Minute Rule
gets the same consistent
and very
message and you get plenty of
pleased with
To find out more, visit: www.tonyknightdoglistener.com OR for more tips, visit: https://tonyknightdoglistener.com/pages/doganxiety
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Why National Pet Remembrance Day is so Important
On Tuesday 5th July, we remember all the beloved pets who have crossed over the Rainbow Bridge. Sadly, these include Pets Mag’s Sophie who gained her angel wings in April. MARIE CARTER-ROBB tells us why the national day, which is now celebrated world-wide as a day of commemoration, is so important.
Vet
I
n the run up to national Pet Remembrance Day on Tuesday 5th July, MARIE CARTER-ROBB, Editor of Pets Magazine, writes on why there was a real need for such a day on which to celebrate the lives of our precious departed pets.
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This year’s national Pet Remembrance Day is particularly poignant for me. On 19th April, I said a final goodbye to my darling Sophie, a true dog in a million. Sophie had celebrated her 14th birthday at the end of February, but many people mistook her for a much younger dog. She loved running around, playing with her favourite toy, Mr Tiger, and she was also filled with her own unique quirks, such as preferring natural water over tap and sneezing for attention. She was the sweetest and most gentle soul I have ever had the privilege to know. Sophie is a huge loss who (I personally don’t ‘get’ anyone who calls a sentient being, ‘it’ or ‘that’) will always hold a special place in my heart.
Pet bereavement is both real and very raw and manifests as an overwhelming sense of loss
loss. Employers, friends, and even other family members, may react as if the death means little and that the individual should just ‘pull themselves together’. Thankfully, with only one or two exceptions, I have generally had a positive experience from other people.
It’s something we try to put to the back of our minds but we know from the start that our pets’ lives are transient. Poignantly, Rudyard Kipling asks plaintively in his poem, ‘The Power of the Dog’, ‘why in—Heaven (before we Remembered forever: Sophie, are there) 22.02.08 - 19.04.22 Should we give our hearts to a dog to tear?’ Kipling’s answer is a ‘Love un inching that simple and pure ‘Buy a pup and your money will cannot lie’. buy; Love unflinching that cannot lie’. felt by anyone who has truly loved a pet. Dogs are also known to develop By loving them like family, we are allowing ourselves to be subjected to heartache when they inevitably slip this mortal coil. The sad fact however is that other people may fail to understand the gravity of the
the kind of attachment that can be described as love. When they see their beloved person, scientists have proven that the ‘cuddle’ chemical oxytocin is produced in their brains.
Th
History is full of close bonds between people and pets. If we look for one moment at bereavement from a pet’s eye view, there are countless stories of dogs demonstrating overwhelming grief upon the death of their master. Perhaps the most well-known is that of the Greyfriars Bobby, a tale of a terrier who, it is claimed, spent 14 years in mourning at his master’s graveside.
a crime - that only the most hard-hearted would ascribe to that we should not also remember and celebrate their lives? That is why Pets Magazine launched national Pet Remembrance Day in the UK back in 2015. We felt there was a need for this special memorial day for pets to allow grief, and remembrance, to come into the open.
job. Having had to make the decision to end my own pets’ lives as well as those of my clients’ pets I completely understand the incredible sense of guilt and the mix of other emotions we all go through.
“For me, like everyone else, animals are part of the family. My ‘boys’, Pan and Badger, were with me for 15 years through thick and thin and their loss utterly crushed me. Events like Pet Remembrance Day are hugely important to e Rainbow Bridge bring people together through shared anguish and unite them to help them I love the idea of a ‘Rainbow Bridge’, remember the great times which our pets are believed to cross with their pets rather than when they die. just the final moments.”
Another poignant story is that of Hachikō, an Akita dog who for nine years after his master’s sudden death returned to the same place at a train station where he used to meet him after work, until his own death in In the Norse legend of Bifrost, the 1935. Spot is another canine who waits in a Rainbow Bridge represents the place where she used to notion that owners will meet their meet her owner Wayne pets again after death in a joyous Giroux before he was reunion. killed by a drink driver in 2010. Giroux’s son, Paul, checks in on Spot twice a Supporters of national Pet day while she stands guard at her post, but he said he knows Remembrance Day include TV it’s never him she wants to see. vet Emma Milne. Paul told US news Emma explains: “As a vet and a channel KSLA 12 “If you can pet owner, I have experienced ever find anything that loves the devastation of pet loss from you that much, it's the most every angle. One of the hardest precious gift in the world.” things for any vet is helping When a living creature with the owners through the most difficult times of their lives but capacity for love brings so much joy into our lives, isn’t it it is also our most important
Best-selling author and speaker Wendy Van de Poll, MS, CEOL (Certified End of Life and Pet Loss Grief Coach and Founder of Center for Pet Loss Grief, LLC) said: “Pet Remembrance Day is a time for outwardly expressing your deepest love for your pets that have reached the end of their lives. The feelings of pet loss grief are deep within your soul and often times you may not give yourself permission to express your emotions of grief. “Outwardly mourning is a way of saying good-bye in a very healthy way by celebrating the life of your beloved
companions. Paying tribute to those animals that touched your heart with a pet funeral, memorial, and/or remembrance will help you heal your loss all the while keeping the love of your companion close by.” Brilliant services such as the PDSA’s Pet Bereavement Support Service (www.pdsa.org.uk/getinvolved/remembering-pets/ dealing-with-grief) have emerged that can help people cope with their grief. Many people worry about asking for time off from work after the death of a beloved companion animal, and the PBSS can advise on ways to have this important discussion with employers, as well as helping in other ways. On July 5th, I will be joining the hundreds, and hopefully thousands, of other bereaved pet owners who will be remembering their beloved departed companion animals, including my special Sophie. Please put Pet Remembrance Day in your diary this year. How you can take part on Pet Remembrance Day: Here are ways you can remember deceased pets on National Pet Remembrance Day, including:
- A memorial service in a place where the pet liked to walk or play. - A memento mori such as a sculpture of the pet - A living memorial by planting a tree or flowerbed - A pet portrait featuring the pet or their image printed on a coaster or other accessory -A scrapbook, blog or social media channel, with photos and other reminders of the pet. - A poem about the pet - Give to animal charities or The Oldies Club and help to support an older dog.
Jacobs uses her own personal experience and grief counselling expertise to guide readers through 31 days of exercises and support to help process your loss. Published by Orion Spring | 16th June 2022 | Hardback | £14.99.
The memorial heart If you’re looking for something truly special to remember your beloved pet, there’s a beautiful Grief Support hand-painted memorial heart by Devon-based Lynda Here are few useful things that Bowler.Pictured above is the will help you in times of grief: heart Lynda produced of Pets Mag’s beautiful Sophie. A truly The Pet Loss Guide by Millie special memento. Jacobs is a book that will help anyone experience the pain of More info: https:// pet loss. The Pet Loss Guide is devonartistnetwork.co.uk/ a long overdue guide to members/member/lyndagrieving a pet. Author Millie bowler.
The Pain of Losing a Beloved Companion Animal
By Dr. DAVID CLIFF
I
t’s amazing how animals touch our lives in all sorts of ways. They stimulate our compassion and our sense of awe. We view them in fascination in terms of how they have evolved and their form and function. When it comes to pets, their personalities emerge and mix with behavioural traits common to each pet species and we develop a unique relationship with them that connects with us.
They become
Pets connect with us in a quintessentially fundamental way. They are who they are, giving of their all from the nature of the beast that they are.
Pets don’t have agendas, they meaningful, don’t have sophisticated they become individual, they cognitive plans from which they become something we can seek to achieve advantage over attach to. Their care the rest of us. requirements and their inability to function in the Our pets simply want to be with manmade environments we us, develop relationships with offer them, places a premium us, attachments of their own to upon us to act with us and display an unusual mix compassion, to act outside of of loyalty, adaptive behaviour, ourselves in a giving, less or simple dependency that calls egocentric way. us to compassion.
finiteness of a pet’s life and there is often less functional dependency on a pet than with other humans, nonetheless when the time comes to say goodbye, the vacuum left instead is great.
Pets are massively important in families where children can learn the value of care, can understand attaching to a pet and discovering the nature of love when family relationships are just a given that one has been born to. Pets are not born to a family; they are accepted into a family.
dogs can actually connect to people with psychological or neurological disorders. If we open ourselves up to our pets, the gifts they give us are enormous, reciprocal but typically always more finite than the relationships we have with our own species. When it is time to say goodbye, this is often a conscionable act where an active decision is made on behalf of a loved companion to end suffering, though it terminates the relationship.
We know with human bereavement, that the support of phone calls and other gestures seem to end a couple of weeks after the funeral, as people lose the loss from their “foreground awareness” and go back to their lives leaving those more intimately connected with the deceased to have to adjust in increasing levels of isolation. Given this happens with our own species, there is often a perception that when a pet ends its life this is something of a lesser status and impact. This is simply not true.
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Many people feel less able to deal with their emotions and express their sense of loss over For our older population, a pet because of a perception by where sadly many old people others that important though it is, “it’s just an animal”. This cannot speak to a familiar implies some sort of ultimate person for up to six weeks at a increased value over human life stretch, pets become constant next to a pet’s life when companions, a source frankly the heart that of meaning, company This nal act of love often re ects the attaches knows little and a way to give and very quality and nature of the difference and doesn’t receive love. relationship itself, but it is nonetheless discriminate between Pets also connect species in the sense of very painful. with us at a very loss that ensues. primal level. We have seen many situations Whilst for most there in an where animals such as cats or understanding of the ultimate
To ignore the impact of their loss is to not only devalue the value of our companions but also to lose connection with our own fundamental emotional and psychological processes that underpin who we are as emotional sentient beings, quite apart from the deleterious impact on our mental health. It is important for all of us to acknowledge the impact of the loss of a loved pet both for ourselves and in our friends, family and our business and work associates when it occurs to them. We also need to be sensitive to the grief of any other animal companions may have in the household also, and remember they often need an owner’s presence and attention at these times.
sad days that follow the ending of a unique relationship.
animal lest they simply “rebound” by trying to fill the vacuum that the loss of a loved It is therefore very important to pet has created, by something acknowledge the impact of a as shallow as a trip to the pet pet in your life and its loss. The shop, only to have to adjust to grieving process is not species the differences and the reality specific and people do need of a uniquely new relationship that must ensue, rather than a substitution for the old. It is no accident that services have evolved to offer support for pet bereavement.
time, do need to reflect and talk, do need to celebrate the impact of the life that one’s pet has brought, the years of joy and pleasure, the companionship, the fun, the meaning and the investment of hard work and patience that can often go with an animal companion in one’s life.
In an increasingly isolated, secular society with more single person households than ever before, one’s pets offer the live in companionship that we often do not have with our own species.
Dr David Cliff is MD of Gedanken, a company specialising in coaching-based Just as with the loss of humans, support and personal development. we need a grieving process to It occurs to me that the effect appropriate psychological intensity of our grief is an wellbeing. We should not inverse reflection of the short-change this process with magnitude of attachment and our animal companions; meaning that a loved one has friends and family need to talk impacted on our lives. about the reality of this. Even Again, this is not species people who are not “pet dependant and we need to be oriented” need an appreciation sensitive to people’s loss and to that the loss is real, tangible, actualise and celebrate the palpable and raw for a long wonderful times that have been time. given by a pet as a People need time to reflect counterbalance to some of the before taking on another
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