When It Rains, It Pours

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P.11 SPORTS The ghosts of sports past P.14 HUMOUR SFU bumbles into a journey of friendship P.06 OPINIONS Vaccines aren’t causing mass death P.03 NEWS SFU student faces deportation VOL. 173 ISSUE 3 January 23, 2023 my journey with acrylic paint pouring
Afghanistan women fighting for their rights 04 NEWS Higher education should be free 05 OPINIONS Fourth year wisdom to survive and thrive in SFU 08 FEATURES Local turntable legend, Kid Koala, announces new album with a board game 07 ARTS & CULTURE 12 The perfect excuse to drop your class 14 HUMOUR the-peak.ca

Fisheries are so much more than just food [ . . . ] They are foundational to our cultures, our peoplehood, our identities.

3 January 23, 2023 NEWS FISHING FOR THE FUTURE
4 NEWS News Editor Karissa Ketter News Writers Natalie Cooke and Aditi Dwivedi news@the-peak.ca
AFGHANISTAN ALLIES
STUDENTS FIRST
5 January 23, 2023 OPINIONS TUITION WOES
6 OPINIONS Opinions Editor Luke Faulks opinions@the-peak.ca NEW LOW
THE NEW LAVENDER SCARE

Ink dries quickly, tears do not.

7 January 23, 2023 ARTS & CULTURE
RECLAIMING THE NARRATIVE

Hannah’s tips to survive

10 ARTS & CULTURE Arts & Culture Editor Petra Chase arts@the-peak.ca
11 January 23, 2023 SPORTS
PHOTO: Leah Hetteberg / Unsplash

What do you like to do in your free time?

I’ll watch some TV or some YouTube. I just watched Glass Onion last night, it was so good! I do like baking, it’s methodical. You can’t mess it up . . . until you mess it up!

Favourite songs to warm up or run to?

Usually people listen to rap, or hard music, but I listen to R&B. It’s a great tempo to run to, and I find that I zone in if I’m listening to that music.

(Check out Carly’s go-to running playlist: “R&B Favourites” on Spotify!)

If you could compete in any track event with any athlete, who would you pick and why?

Honestly, I’m going to say Jerome Blake because he used to be on the Cheetahs, and I used to train with him. He’s a fun guy — and now he’s an Olympian!

Do you have any rituals or superstitions?

It’s so hard to find a routine that works every time, because each place you go to compete is just so different. You really have to focus on yourself; you can’t let anybody else psych you out.

What are your favourite courses you’ve taken at SFU?

There’s one art course [CA 262] I really loved. It’s called “Practices in Drawing.” I guess I really liked that because it tied into biology in a way, and it was just a really good way to look at things differently. I just took Vertebrate Biology. The course load was intense. We dissected a cat, pigeon, turtle, a fish, and a mudpuppy, which is kind of like an axolotl.

(Fun fact: a mudpuppy is NOT an actual dog.)

Do you have any go-to restaurant recommendations?

I really love burgers, so Romers is really good. They actually have good gluten-free buns. Red Robins has really good flavoured burgers. There’s one sushi place in Maple Ridge called Wasabi Grill, and half of their menu is gluten-free.

What’s your favourite track memory?

BC Summer Games in 2016. I was elected for high jump, long jump, and hurdles. I didn’t win anything, but I got a personal best in high jump. My personal best at the time was 1m 55cm; my mom told me to “get over 160.” I think it was my third attempt. I just barely skimmed it.

MINDSET MATTERS

Once athletes achieve a certain level of performance, those who continue to progress and become great do so in their heads, not on the field.

12 SPORTS Sports Editor Isabella Urbani Sports Writer Simran Sarai sports@the-peak.ca

2. Showing up to class is already a W

3. Lower your expectations

This is probably the most valuable life hack. Why do people feel the need to achieve success at such a high level when they can achieve success at a low level? You save time, energy, effort, coffee, phone battery . . . you name it. Just make an easy goal and reach it! Grab the “meeting expectations” line on the grade spectrum and drag it wherever you want. In the immortal words of DJ Snake, “Get low.”

4. Lie about your grades

Let’s say you and your classmates are chatting and you tell them you got 98% on your final paper. The benefits! They will be so impressed and compliment you, wishing they could be as successful as you. This will (fakely) boost your self-esteem. The risks! What if the professor announces that the highest mark in the class was 95%? What if you leave your laptop unattended for a minute and your classmate sees your mark? What if you’re a bad liar? They’ll know you’re lying. Oh well! Then you’ll learn to grow as a person, and all is good!

5. Present yourself professionally

By having a professional appearance every day, your instructors and peers will assume you’re a highly qualified student. You know the kind of students who dress maturely, sit at the front of every class to interact with the professor more, always prepares a ton of notes, and walks around campus carrying a textbook or two. Be like them and maybe that’ll help! You know what they say: fake it until you make a Beedie student proud.

your meaning of academic validation

8.

validation Here’s an at-home DIY validation grabbing method: Ask your trusted siblings if they would say great things about your work in exchange for chocolate. This fake validation will eventually give you the courage to push through the schoolwork!

10. Get outstanding grades

In

13 January 23, 2023 HUMOUR
don’t know what academic validation means to you. Maybe it means receiving academic-related compliments, feeling proud of yourself, or simply being enrolled as an SFU student and having an ID card for proof. Or
a popularity contest to
the class.
advise you to tweak the
sweet academic validation and make it your own.
Well, if you want something sweet, then get it on Halloween week. No matter where your grades are at, you’ll find sweet rewards everywhere. Who cares if it’s unrelated to academics? If you can satisfy your sweet tooth, then your job is done.
Show
your effort level remains the same throughout the semester, no one will notice your progression. However, if you start the term as a problematic student who struggles with school and later show how smart you actually are, then everyone will be surprised and impressed by your fast and incredible progress. We all love a comeback story!
6. Change
I
maybe it’s just
see who’s the most favourited in
I
definition of
1. Go around campus on Halloween week
7.
progression — start bad, end great If
are so many things that could’ve stopped you . . . sleeping through your alarm, missing your bus, realizing your assignment failed to upload on Canvas the night before, or simply lacking the motivation to go. By attending class, you are proving how responsible you are as a young adult.
to be proud of.
There
This is something
DIY
at least
get extra
you
your
you
your
9. Just be a hardworking individual and gain respect from that Look, if people notice that you’re
trying to get the answers right in class and attending office hours to
help, they will have respect for
no matter where
grades are at. As long as
haven’t been a jerk during
time at SFU.
reality, receiving sweet, sweet academic validation is not complicated. You only need these five words: Ace every exam and assignment. Then you’re all set! Stop wasting time looking for ways to avoid work. Instead, study harder! Clearly, your efforts are what you’ve been missing all along! [Runs away into sweet validation valley.]

myschedule.erp.sfu.ca

SFU announces “SF-uper BFF” app to curb anti-social reputation

The app is a copycat of the popular “Bumble BFF” app

14 HUMOUR Humour Editor Kelly Chia humour@the-peak.ca
January 23, 2023
16 DIVERSIONS Business Manager Yuri Zhou business@the-peak.ca CROSSWORD SUDOKU LAST WEEK'S SOLUTIONS You can contribute!

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