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Things to give you that perfect fall feeling

Men’s soccer remains unbeaten on the year

first peek

October 3, 2016 - Volume 154, Issue 5

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Let your beautiful titties run wild

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I’m writing this having just gotten my second gum graft in three years. For those who are blissfully unaware, a gum graft is a gross, grossly painful thing you get when your gums decide to GTFO. My gums are checking out because I grind my teeth. I grind my teeth because I’m an anxious person.

I don't talk about anxiety a lot. Partly because I know my experiences have been nowhere near as difficult as many others'.

Partly because anxiety and depression are rooted in my family tree, so my nerves have always just seemed . . . normal.

I say normal, not to suggest that anyone’s anxiety is “abnormal,” but to say that I’ve never questioned my reactions to stress because I see so many people in my family having similar reactions.

Most of my aunts, uncles, and cousins — as well as my mother and brother — deal with anxiety and/or depression in some form or another. We all have brains that pace back and forth over concerns, whether that worry’s warranted or not. At family reunions, we pull out examples of our obsessive natures, comparing and marvelling at how similar we are.

It’s been embedded in me from a young age. I remember spending sleepless nights as a child, planning out my escape plan if my home should suddenly burst into flames. My parents eventually bought me a fire escape ladder to calm those nerves.

I feel stressed when I’m running late, when I make mistakes, and in a plethora of social situations.

Even if there’s genuinely nothing to worry about, I will find something to worry about.

I express my worry physically, picking at my cuticles until they’re pink and raw and sore.

That gum graft I just got? Another stress expression. My teeth have only been saved from my grinding them by the grace of my night mouth guard. I got my first gum graft when I was 19 years old — something my dentist said was not exactly normal.

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I keep ignoring those pangs of anxiety, even though I know it won’t do me any favours in the long run. Logically, I know that if you need help with something you should get help, but the thought of meditation or therapy is itself nerve-wracking. So instead, I brush off my propensity for worry, and get gum grafts to treat the symptom rather than the source.

These fallouts from stress will just keep happening though. If my family history is anything to go by, it’s not something that just disappears. There’s only so much real estate in my mouth that can conceivably require gum grafts, but there are plenty of other physical, mental, and emotional ways that stress and anxiety can take a toll.

My mom went on long-term disability from work as a result of her anxiety and depression.

That served as a wake-up call — one that I have not heeded, but should.

If you need help, you deserve help. It’s not an easy or comfortable prospect, but the people I’ve spoken with have found help that works for them through trial and error. I’m a hypocrite, because I still haven’t done more than download an app for stress.

I’m slow to recognize that I can’t keep ignoring my nerves. But recognition is the first step, and it’s one worth taking.

4 News

Canada’s commitment of 30 percent reduction by 2030 better achieved by more flexible regulations

A recent report out of SFU suggests that Canada could achieve its emissions targets without implementing carbon taxes.

This comes after Canada’s Environment Minister, Catherine McKenna, said the federal government is ready to introduce provincial carbon prices.

The report, titled Is Win-Win Possible?: Can Canada’s Government Achieve Its Paris Commitment . . . and Get Re-Elected?, was authored

by Mark Jaccard, Mikela Hein, and Tiffany Vass from the School of Resource and Environmental Management. It caught national headlines after it was released last week.

Jaccard has a PhD in economics, is a Fellow of the Royal Society of Canada, and has served on the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, and BC’s Climate Action Team.

Jaccard said, in an interview with the CBC, that his question for investigation was “how big would that [carbon] price have to be” to achieve the 2030 Paris Agreement targets?

Jaccard reported that it would start at BC’s price, $30 per tonne of CO2 — or seven cents per litre of gasoline — and would eventually rise to $200 by 2030. That would be

the equivalent of adding four cents per year per litre of gasoline for the next 14 years. The report argues this would be politically untenable.

The Canadian government has committed to ratifying the Paris Agreement by April 2017. This would mean reducing greenhouse gas emissions by 30 percent below 2005 levels within the next 14 years.

“We have to reduce emissions, which means that we must have effective policies that succeed politically,” Jaccard wrote.

Canada has “widely missed emission targets for 2000, 2005, and 2010,” continued Jaccard. He remarked that the latest government reports show “the 2020 target will also be widely missed.”

Ashley Fraser / Print News Editor

news@the-peak.ca

Jaccard told the CBC that the motivation behind the report was “frustration with [. . .] energy-climate economists” who tell politicians “the only way to reduce greenhouse gas emissions is to ‘price carbon,’ meaning a carbon tax like we have in BC and in Alberta, or the cap-and-trade in Quebec and Ontario.”

Politicians like Prime Minister Trudeau and Minister Catherine McKenna “buy into that language,” according to Jaccard.

Economists’ message to governments is to “do things as cheaply as possible, and emissions price [. . .] is the best policy,” said Jaccard. But research from political science and sociology explains “distortions of reality” when carbon taxes are imposed.

Jaccard’s report drew from behavioral economics, political science, and social psychology to present alternatives to pure carbon pricing.

BC is often looked at as a success story of carbon tax implementation, suggesting it could happen anywhere. “In fact, it’s happened nowhere else,” as Jaccard told CBC. Former BC premier, Gordon Campbell, lost 20 points in the polls after

his Liberals introduced the tax, according to Jaccard.

California is reducing its emissions through “regulations that are quite flexible” on car and fuel retailers, Jaccard said.

This means that car retailers have to sell a certain percentage of cars that are electric, or else pay fines. For example, if Tesla sells only electric cars, they can trade their extra sales over the quota to other retailers like Chrysler, which sells primarily gasoline vehicles.

As Jaccard writes, flexible regulation also avoids the “temptation” for governments to use emissions pricing revenues inefficiently.

“The goal of climate policy is to transition our economy away from devices that burn coal, oil, and natural gas. We already have all of the technologies and energy forms needed to achieve near-zero emissions economy-wide,” the report said. The transition, however, will increase costs of energy services like heating, vehicle use, and electricity.

Because electricity prices vary significantly between provinces and regions, data showed it would be best for the federal government to implement the flexible regulations along with “modest assistance” to a few provinces with high electricity costs.

As stated early on in the report, “Carbon pricing is a choice, not a necessity, for effective emissions reductions.”

On Friday September 30, the Simon Fraser Student Society (SFSS) held their Annual General Meeting inviting all students to attend at the SFU Diamond Family Theatre.

Roughly 25 students attended the meeting, where various motions were put forward by students during the open space discussion.

Grayson Barke, council representative for the Environmental Resource Student Union, expressed his concern for the proposed expansion of the tank farm below Burnaby Mountain, and the lack of information surrounding a plan for evacuation on the mountain in the event of an emergency.

Dylan Belvedere on behalf of the Mechatronic Systems Engineering Society (MSESS) expressed his motion to provide greater services for students on the Surrey and Vancouver campuses. He specifically stressed that students in MSESS, who attend most of their classes on the Surrey campus, do not have access to services such as the Women’s Centre and Out On Campus, despite the fact that these students pay the same student activity fee.

Another student, Darien Lechner, asked the board what the proposed plans were for the student levy following the cancellation of the stadium. The SFSS is currently involved in a tripartite agreement with SFU, and Scotiabank. As it stands, the allegation of the student levy cannot be changed until all three members of the agreement change its binding documentation.

Following the open space discussion the SFSS continued their proceedings with a brief review of the events and activities since May 2015. Vice president of finance, Hangue Kim and the independent auditor Tompkins, Wozny, Miller & Co also presented a review of the year's financial report.

Did you know you can attend SFU Board of Directors meetings? Join the SFSS October 7 at 2:30 p.m. in Forum Chambers for the latest SFSS discussion and news.

News

October 3, 2016

5

Canada negotiating an extradition treaty with China Prime Minister Justin Trudeau recently announced that Canada is negotiating an extradition treaty with China. The controversial treaty, which would allow China to pursue people living in Canada for crimes committed in China, comes with major ethical concerns considering China's human rights record. One such issue is that

China employs the death penalty, which is unconstitutional by Canadian standards. NDP leader Tom Mulcair has criticized the treaty for this, while Trudeau has stressed Canada’s “extremely high standards” during negotiations.

With files from CBC News

Difficult to maintain precarious Syria ceasefire The ceasefire in war-torn Syria has been described as desperately needed by its people, many of whom are displaced and struggling to rebuild.

However, the ceasefire is fragile, and reports have claimed it has already been broken after a United Nations aid convoy fell victim to an airstrike.

Syria has blamed the United States

Professor Gerolymatos and SFU students talk to The Peak about their concerns over terrorism, and ISIL in Canada

Chibok Secondary School, Nigeria, 276. Garissa University College, Kenya, 142. Peshawar school, Pakistan, 132.

These figures represent the number of student victims from terrorist attacks taking place in their own schools over the last few years.

The rise of the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIL) and the recent explosion in New York which left 29 people injured, make the US and Canada fear for random attacks in public spaces. But should Canadian students be worried about the risk of terrorism at their own universities?

Canada, along with many other countries, has been explicitly threatened by ISIL. According to Professor André Gerolymatos, director of the Stavros Niarchos Foundation Centre for Hellenic Studies and a specialist on terrorism, Canada’s participation in the war in Afghanistan and the presence of “Canadian advisors in Syria” have made the country a target of ISIL. Indeed, as of 2015, between 130 and 145 Canadian people left for Syria to fight with ISIL. Their potential return makes Canada fear “lone wolves”: people trained in Syria or Iraq, and then sent back to commit attacks against their home country. According to Gerolymatos,

“this will become more prevalent, as ISIS loses ground in the Middle East.”

Given the terrorist tactic of spreading fear among the population, attacks would likely occur in symbolic places with the aim of hurting as many people as possible, Gerolymatos said. Hence, universities have become key targets as symbolic places of Western education and diversity, and emotionally charged because of the young age of potential victims.

Gerolymatos added that universities are also big targets because of the concentration of people, the isolation from big cities, and potential lack of security on campus.

Nevertheless, exchange as well as domestic students said they are not afraid of terrorism occurring at SFU. On the contrary, Emma, a student from England, and Mink, from the Netherlands, both said they feel more reassured than in Europe.

They explained several reasons, including the mistaken idea that Canada is not militarily involved in the fight against ISIL. Carrying a gun is also not as easy in Canada as in the US, where shootings have occurred in several schools in recent years. Entering Canada is more difficult than Europe, which is closer to the Middle East. More importantly, they consider Canada a welcoming, multicultural, and tolerant society, in which people cannot feel legitimately excluded to the point where they would want to attack it.

This perspective, according to Gerolymatos, reflects the gap between the visions of European and Canadian society.

“There are people who are not happy, who are marginalized,” he said. “They’re not many — we’re not talking about thousands of people — but it only takes one.”

However, attacks remain very rare in Canada, and would be highly improbable on campus.

Jason, a Canadian student, expressed views similar to his peers: “I don’t feel like students are a particular target. It doesn’t matter your age and who you are, so we’ll keep going out and having fun.”

for ending the ceasefire, whereas the United States points towards the airstrike as an indication of Russia's lack of commitment to bringing peace to Syria. Regardless, the collapse of the ceasefire may worsen the struggle of the people of Syria.

With files from CBC News and CNN

Referendum on government surveillance powers In Switzerland, a new law has been approved democratically through a referendum, giving the Swiss government greater jurisdiction in its ability to monitor private communications. The Swiss government, when necessary, now has the ability to listen to phone conversations and read private emails. Switzerland has previously had very well-protected

individual privacy, with people wary of surveillance after a government spying scandal was uncovered in the 1980s. However, fears have risen in light of terror attacks in the neighbouring country, France, causing 65.5 percent of voters to support giving up their privacy for increased security.

With files from BBC News

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6 News

Ashley Fraser / Print News Editor

news@the-peak.ca

Gil Kelley talks to Vancouver residents about his vision for the city’s urban design

Eagerly awaiting their new chief planner, there was an air of excitement amongst the residents of Vancouver who sat in the audience of the Vancouver Playhouse Theatre on the night of September 28.

“Most of my friends in the US suspect that my wife and I actually came here and took this job in advance of the election,” he joked as the crowd laughed and eased into their seats. “And in this case, I don’t mind if I prove them right.” This is Gil Kelley. He started just a few weeks ago as Vancouver’s new general manager of planning, urban design, and sustainability.

Having lived in the United States all his life, Kelley has worked in planning for Berkeley, San Francisco, and Portland. The City of Vancouver mentions that he has been revered for his accomplishments and ingenuity in the planning realm. With his long list of credentials, Kelley now plans to take on the daunting task of spearheading Vancouver’s current urban issues.

The theme of West Coast Cities ran throughout the evening. As a newcomer, Kelley was quick to draw on his experiences from our geographical siblings to the south at the event hosted by the Vancouver Urbanarium Society. He emphasized how much these cities can learn from

each other, as they have mutual concerns over issues such as housing and affordability. They also share a similar civic energy, new city optimism, and environmental and social ethics in politics.

For a city that focuses so much on livability, Kelley pointed out that some of the processes can often add to the problem instead of take away from it, and how the old paradigm for how cities are formed isn’t sufficient for the 21st century.

“I think our four cities have the best chance of cracking that and developing a new paradigm,” he said. “I sense that there is a moment of time here to really take a big leap forward.”

He offered many different areas around the city where he would like to see development. His ideas include taking advantage of the Broadway corridor metro potential, bringing back the waterfront at the base of

SFU engineering professor Dr. John Jones explains the possibility of creating a human colony on Mars

Over 44 years ago, astronaut Gene Cernan became the last person to ever set foot on an extraterrestrial surface. Ever since he departed the moon and the Apollo program ended, humanity has not gone beyond low Earth orbit.

SpaceX CEO Elon Musk wants to change that within the next two decades. On September 27, Musk held a press conference outlining SpaceX’s intention of creating a human colony on Mars.

Ambitious? Yes. Impossible?

No. As SFU engineering professor Dr. John Jones explained, “I think

we have all the necessary technology right now. [. . .] Although we haven't designed a Mars ship, we don't need any particular breakthrough to do so.”

Musk’s hour-long presentation outlined exactly how SpaceX intended to reach and ultimately create a colony on a planet which at times lies 401 million km away from Earth. One major idea put forward was the need for “full reusability,” as a way of combatting the hurdle of expense.

To achieve this full reusability, SpaceX would build a launch

Granville and Cordova, and reimagining the Millennium Line.

With all his praise, Kelley also wasn’t short of highlighting the ways in which Vancouver’s incremental planning has lost its way over the years.

He found strengths in its leadership as an iconic city, a global model, and as a place where citizens hold the community responsible. However, the future of planning for Vancouver had no larger narrative, he said.

He explained how the planning

function had shrunk, and that layering bylaws over the years has led to internal conflict and misdirection on where the city is going in the future. It’s also been affecting Vancouver’s ability to view itself as a whole community.

During the Q&A, Kelley talked about the important role of affordability for the youth of Vancouver. Two of the biggest concerns were the change in the economy and millennials being driven out of the city. These are priorities in his new role as chief planner.

And while the housing crisis isn’t an easy topic to grapple with, he knew one thing for sure: “We can’t just have the people who look like you and I age in place.”

Kelley managed to address nearly all the sticking points for the residents of Vancouver, many of whom congratulated him on it.

He was thankful for the opportunity to address everyone, and reiterated how all of his hypotheticals would start to become real problem-solving initiatives as he eased into his job.

Vancouver’s new chief city planner is hopeful, and he wants to challenge the City of Vancouver to strive for the excellence he knows it’s capable of. “Can we continue on the path of livability, can we ramp up the path of sustainability, and can we really take on the question of social equity and inclusiveness? Because that’s the sweet spot.”

system that was capable of taking off vertically, placing a spaceship into orbit, then returning to Earth, landing vertically on the same launch pad from which it had taken off earlier.

once again take off to refuel the orbiting spacecraft. The tanker and rocket would then finally return to Earth, only to repeat this refuelling process three to five times until the spacecraft has been completely fuelled.

Once completed, the launch system and tanker would return to Earth, while the spacecraft embarks to the red planet at a coasting speed of 100,800 km/h.

All this achieved with a rocket capable of over 28 million pounds of thrust. Now, having completed the first leg of the journey, those on board the spacecraft would

have only just begun facing the dangers of their one-way trip to Mars, knowing they will never step foot on their home planet again.

Dr. Jones noted that “the trickiest technological challenge” in planning a mission to Mars “is probably protecting the colonists from radiation during the six months that they'd be in transit.” Without proper shielding, the colonists would be exposed to extremely hazardous amounts of radiation, a challenge that SpaceX will undoubtedly need to solve before anyone heads off to their new home.

With the goal of manned missions to Mars set for 2026, one important question remains: what would you pay to call Mars home?

Once landed, the rocket has only completed a fraction of the job. From there, once loaded with a tanker filled with fuel for the spacecraft that is now in orbit around Earth, the rocket would

News

October 3, 2016

The seventh annual event brought together students, staff, and the community

The sun was shining at SFU Surrey campus on September 30 for the seventh annual Terry Fox Walk/Run. Friday was Terry Fox Day, and SFU Surrey joined the Burnaby and Vancouver campuses in running for the cure, with all funds raised going towards the Terry Fox Foundation.

Students, staff and faculty, and members of the community all came

together to walk and run, with the route starting at the plaza outside of SFU Surrey and encompassing the perimetre of Holland Park by King George SkyTrain station. Various teams were organized together with different themes, from matching shirts to a Harry Potter-themed team.

Steve Dooley, the executive director at SFU’s Surrey campus,

emphasized that this event was a great one to bring together various groups as one big community, as well as a chance to raise money for a great cause.

“At SFU Surrey, we are all part of one big community that is defined by this neighbourhood, and it gives us an opportunity to connect with the community in a very neighbourly way,� Dooley told The Peak. “It’s also great to help raise funds for such an amazing cause, especially since Terry was an SFU student who set a great example for our students as well as the community.�

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After a warm welcome from Dooley, SFU student and former SFSS president Enoch Weng shared an inspiring story of someone in his life who reflected Terry’s courage: his brother Luke, who was diagnosed with cancer at 17, but is now cancer-free. “I think of it this way: if [Terry] didn’t have cancer, there would be no Marathon of Hope,� Luke said. “Terry Fox is a hero to me, [. . .] he took his downfall and used it to help a lot of people.�

Enoch added, “Cancer sucks, but the people here [at the Terry Fox Run] rock because they are here to support the cause.�

Further, the Weng brothers hope that people take Terry’s example of persevering in the face of hardship.

Luke compared it to the refining of a precious metal like silver: “Silver goes through intense heat [. . .] in the end, it turns into something so beautiful, so pure [. . .] and something like suffering inspires me. I can use it, I can turn it into something great. Don’t let the opportunity to help someone pass you by.�

This is the spirit and legacy of Terry Fox: despite his adversity, he worked hard to make a difference.

To date, over $650 million has been raised worldwide for cancer research.

With Friday’s event, SFU helped to play a critical part in the fight to find a cure for cancer.

Our article "Build SFU stadium cancellation causes controversy for SFSS" claimed associate VP of students Tim Rahilly wrote that the SFSS "had reported misinformation about the stadium project to students." In fact, the letter received by The Peak did not specify whether the misinformation had been reported to students or to Rahilly himself. We regret the error.

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8 Opinions

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Recently, complaints about crowding on BC trails such as Joffre Lakes and Garibaldi have skyrocketed. Places that were once pristine are now almost impossible to find parking in; full of damaged footbridges and campsites; littered with waste; and generally lacking solitude.

This has led many avid hikers to claim that social media is ruining hiking in BC. While I sympathize, I think some problem-solving and perspective-shifting can make all the difference.

Platforms like Instagram get a lot of blame. Many hikers opt out of location tagging, to hide their favourite trails from the rest of BC. To these people: I’m sorry that some beautiful places are now crowded, but you have to share. The reality is that they’re not your trails, and there are plenty of others to hike in BC — stop being selfish.

Besides, seeing others on the trail isn’t so bad. Almost everyone I bump into is extremely happy to be there and a pleasure to talk

Picture waking up at the first sign of sunrise and preparing for a day of hiking in the beautiful mountains of super, natural British Columbia. After keeping a steady pace on a gruelling incline, you reach the summit.

Ahhhhhhh, you think, 360 degrees of breathtaking nature — until you hear, “Now get me in a shot over here! Make sure my butt’s in it!”

It was only a matter of time before the issues of social media etiquette and hiking clashed. While many will defend social media to the death, there are plenty of reasons to leave the phone at home (or at least in your pocket) when going on a hike.

We live in a constant state of worrying about the future. Tests, assignments, grades, finances, relationships — you name it, we worry about it. Staying connected to your social media accounts, full of updates and pressures to keep up with everyone’s lives, can be exhausting. Leaving behind your “information box” lets you

Zach Siddiqui / Opinions Editor

opinions@the-peak.ca

to. Our surroundings motivate people to become more active — isn’t this what we want? If people are trying to get the perfect picture while doing this, who cares?

That’s their prerogative.

Sadly, although we’re surrounded by beautiful backcountry, most of our population will never experience this. There’s no better way to rejuvenate from our “overworked” Western culture than walking through the mountains for 48 hours, or waking up to an eyeful of stars. So to anyone who wants to join, welcome! But please, do your part.

The real problem is increasing trail damage, pollution, and safety concerns. People litter trails with banana peels, apple cores, and even toilet paper. Not only is this an unpleasant view, but it’s harmful to the local flora and fauna.

It’s also common to see people completely unprepared for the elevation gain, trail conditions, and overnight backpacking — which sometimes leads to injuries, death, and expensive rescue missions.

With guidance and education, we can reduce these problems.

For example, many people just aren’t aware that although fruit peels are biodegradable, they can take years to fully degrade, leaving a mess for quite some time. Also, leaving food waste in the trailhead garbage can produces methane gas that is harmful to the atmosphere. Bring your food waste home and compost it; compost facilities use heat to degrade these products faster.

If you see someone on the trail making mistakes like these, kindly inform them of the consequences of their actions. Too often, I see either no one addressing these issues or the opposite: people being extremely mean to others, which just makes the targets defensive and non-compliant.

So instead of grumbling to your other hiker friends about the Instagrammers on the trails, or bullying the casual hikers tagging locations and writing articles, do something that’s actually helpful, while acknowledging that everyone has the right to enjoy the immense beauty that BC has to offer.

breathe, and breathing leads to living in the moment.

Being in nature has been scientifically proven to reduce depression, anxiety, and stress. In his books, The Nature Principle and Last Child in the Woods, journalist Richard Louv refers to the development of a phenomenon he calls “nature-deficit disorder.”

He uses this term to describe behavioural issues present in children who spend excessive time indoors — a direct result of living in a high-tech society. Despite criticism from the medical community drawn by this informal term, the point remains that bringing your phone to the very place you go to escape the high-tech world is counterproductive.

Most hikers know that a sort of “hiking etiquette” exists. “Leave no trace,” “take nothing with you,” and “hike quietly” are among the rules.

Many avid hikers have added “no cell phones” to the list.

I had a personal experience where a young girl had her phone blaring obnoxious autotuned rap as loudly as possible. People don’t want to hear that shit on a bus, let alone a mountain. If you’re worried about bears, a regular speaking volume is often more than enough to scare off those timid creatures, even before you realize they are there.

Lastly, while I can’t refute that mountain pictures are beautiful, having every possible angle posted on Instagram ruins the surprise.

The end goal of a hike is to view this beauty in person, and it’s even more rewarding when you haven’t seen it before.

Focus on the time spent with your hiking partner or, if solo, the sounds of nature, the smells, and the view you won’t get every day.

Instead of aiming for the pristine mountaintop photo of you in your skintight yoga pants, why not work on making your health pristine instead? Make this moment selfishly yours. There’s no need to share.

Opinions

9

October 3, 2016

MONAR-CRUSH

I’m the most British Canadian you will ever meet, so the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge visiting my city is like if the Canucks had actually won the Stanley Cup in 2011: hella awesome.

It’s hard to explain why the royals are such a big deal to the English; all I can tell you is that I’ve been obsessed with them from a very young age, thanks to my grandparents. My Bumma and Grandad gave me my first plate of fish ‘n’ chips, first cup of tea, and first look at the royal family.

At this point, anyone with British relatives knows what I’m talking about, but there’s an even more personal reason for how I feel about Will and Kate: my grandmother used to work for the Queen’s cousin, Louis Mountbatten. Let’s just say that when your grandmother has helped write Christmas cards to the monarchy, you kind of give a shit about them.

Now that I’ve alienated every non-British person out there, let’s get down to why the royal visit is actually important.

Because of my family history, it may appear that I have rose-coloured glasses on when it comes to the royals, which is true to a point.

I’m also a political science major who can recognize a political figurehead when I see one.

In this day and age, the British monarchy has very little control over how the country is run — and looking at some of the decisions they’ve made in the past, that’s probably a good thing. What power they do possess is purely their celebrity.

Yet it’s this star power that allows them to effect change. Royals can use their position in society to draw attention to social issues, charities, and initiatives that desperately need public attention — which the late Princess Diana was well-known for.

Now, her son Will is continuing on by visiting at-risk communities with his family. The Vancouver Sun reported that the Duke and Duchess would visit a charity that works with mothers-to-be who struggle with substance abuse, right in the heart of the Downtown Eastside.

Photo illustration by Alexa Tarrayo / The Peak

Let me say that again: members of the royal family are going to visit the most impoverished area in Vancouver.

In addition, they’ll be visiting First Nations communities, an active refugee office, and even visiting the Vancouver coast guard base in Kitsilano that was closed between 2013–16. These actions highlight issues that aren’t always prioritized by Canadians, but are still extremely important in ensuring quality of life for citizens — especially

the disadvantaged members of our population.

A global spotlight follows the young couple, and they choose to go where their presence may help change the lives of those less fortunate. Though I highly doubt they’ll do much charity work themselves, their visit can — and most likely will — inspire others to donate time or money to help members of the community.

Despite the benefits of the royals touring British Columbia, I can understand where skeptics are coming

from. The pomp and ceremony I find delightful can be frustrating for the people who live in these areas, not to mention the price tag associated with the visit.

All I can say to those people is that Will and Kate will be gone soon enough, and things will go back to normal. As far as the money goes, we paid Stephen Harper’s salary as prime minister for nine years — putting up the royals for a few days isn’t the worst financial decision our country’s ever made.

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That shit is a hard truth to learn as a starry-eyed toddler eager to be a rich and beautiful bitch.

It’s all I ever wished for as a child.

Becoming a princess ain’t no simple feat either: you either have to be of royal birth or fuck a prince. Do you know where all the princes are? Because I clearly don’t. I’ve tonguekissed at least 30 frogs, yet all I’ve

ever gotten from it was a weird lip sore.

Not a single charming, beautiful prince with a six-figure salary and a big rooster to wake me up every morning in our fairytale mansion.

I’m really not asking for much here.

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Pass the peas, please.

These plump lil’ babies are the perfect surfers for a bowl of mashed potatoes, excellent companions to a spicy Indian rice, or BIB (beautiful in butter).

Additionally, pea is pronounced as “P,” which is easily among the greatest

letters of the alphabet. “A pleasurable pot full of penises and peaches" is a phrase that would never exist without this magnificent letter. There are also many great P-named thinkers: Plato, Pythagoras, and Pinky from Pinky and the Brain.

(Obviously Pinky is smarter. No one named “the Brain” is going to be smart.

That mouse is definitely battling some real small-dick complexes.)

No one can resist the charisma of the pea. Only an idiot could hate these charming legumes.

Janis McMath, Humour Editor

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12 Arts

TUESDAY, OCTOBER 4

4:45pm 5:45pm

arts@the-peak.ca

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 5

THURSDAY, OCTOBER 6

11am 12pm

Grammar Gab w/ Copy Editor Natalie Serafini

12pm - 1pm Got an Opinion? w/

Web News Editor Nathan Ross Aspiring Newsies w/ Print News Editor Ashley Fraser

12:30pm 1pm

Speed Dating Style Feedback w/ Contributors and Editors

1pm - 2pm Reach for the Feach w/

Becoming a Photo Pro w/ Photo Editor Alexa Tarrayo and Arts Editor Jessica Whitesel

1pm - 2pm The Lowdown on Sports w/

12pm - 1pm Interview Skills 101 w/

1pm - 2pm

Jess Whitesel / Arts Editor

Sports Editor Nick Bondi

Opinions Editor Zach Siddiqui Features Editor Tamara Connor 2pm - 3pm For the Love of Arts w/

Arts Editor Jessica Whitesel

Arts

October 3, 2016

A Tribe Called Red is impossible to ignore. Having steadily gained popularity since its inception in 2007, the band’s latest is its best yet: a visceral and endlessly inventive mix of hip-hop, electronica, and traditional First Nations singing and drumming.

But what elevates We Are the Halluci Nation from being a great album to an essential one is neither its virtuosic experiments with sound, nor its impressive guest appearances — notably from Yasiin Bey (formerly Mos Def) and throat singer Tanya Tagaq. Rather, the album’s greatest strength is its political immediacy: We Are the Halluci Nation is to the First Nations experience in Canada what To Pimp a Butterfly is to the black experience in the United States.

Deftly unpacking the lingering effects of colonialism and the ongoing erasure of First Nations communities across the country, We Are the Halluci Nation is as illuminating as it is engaging. You can’t afford to miss it. – MJH

I can’t think of a more aptly titled album than Jason Aldean’s They Don’t Know, because I sure as hell don’t.

His last album, Old Boots, New Dirt, was lacking the country rock sound that took Aldean into the public eye. He’s managed to find some of it again with the title track (“They Don’t Know”), but overall the album is still lacking that harder sound. Ultimately it sounds like any other country artist could have recorded this album.

It’s not that the songs are bad. As far as country music goes, it’s perfectly middle of the road, but I expected more and I was definitely hoping he’d put the formula he’s been using lately away. Redneck anthems and sultry songs about sex are allowed to evolve. – CM

Five years after releasing Bon Iver, Bon Iver is back with 22, A Million, an album that goes deeper into the electronic dimension of a sound that had only been hinted at previously.

I feel like it needs to be made clear that this is not an electronic album — it still stays true to the Bon Iver sound that has been cultivated since the days of “Skinny Love.” It is apparent though that Justin Vernon took some sonic inspiration from former collaborators Kanye West and Jay Z when putting this album together. The opening to “715 CRΣΣKS” and subsequent use of pared down autotune sounds like something off of West’s 808s and Heartbreaks. This is the most electronic track on the album, and even though it is highly produced, it doesn't feel out of place on the album or in the Bon Iver catalogue.

This album is Bon Iver’s strongest work to date, and even though the band broke up temporarily in 2012, the hiatus didn’t hurt the band. If anything, it made them stronger and more open to musical experimentation. – JW

Walking into Neverland Tea Salon in Kitsilano is like walking into a storybook. With fine bone china hanging from the ceiling and whimsical-looking furniture, you are instantly transported to Neverland. The entire atmosphere is very prim and proper, and if this is what being a grandmother is like, I could be one.

The Neverland Grande High Tea is the best bang for your buck, and won’t leave you as broke as some other high tea places. It consists of five savoury courses, four sweet courses, a choice between a sweet or savoury scone, and unlimited tea for only $32 a person. A splurge, but a worth-it kind of splurge.

The savoury courses were fancied up versions of your favourite classic sandwiches, like egg salad or grilled cheese. My personal favourite was the croissant, which had pesto, mushroom paté, and a beautiful, thick slice of brie cheese.

I didn’t care much for the chicken salad, which was basically like your jeans-wearing cousin showing up to your formal Christmas party, or the grilled cheese with the Dijon mustard (because really, who wants a green-coloured grilled cheese sandwich?).

All the sweet courses were on point, with my personal favourite being the pumpkin-chocolate swirl cheesecake. I might be basic, but that cake was amazing. I also chose a sweet scone that had lemon zest and sugar, accompanied with Devonshire cream and strawberry jam. It was the best scone I have ever had, with just the right amount of crunch on the

outside, and a soft and flaky inside that wasn’t dry like most other scones. Because of this, scones have levelled up from cardboard substitute to edible carbs.

But the main attraction was definitely their tea selection. Regardless of what tea you love, there is something for you.

13

The great thing about Neverland is that you aren’t restricted to one tea: your unlimited tea can change each time you run out.

For an adventurer like me, I tried three different teas: lavender earl grey, Mumbai chai, and vanilla ice cream. My favourite was the lavender earl grey, which has now become one of the new basic flavour combinations. Just one sip of this and you are wrapped up in a blanket of lavender.

The service is incredible and the servers are really friendly and knowledgeable about the various teas, the blends of flavours, and what goes well with what items if you choose to order à la carte.

If you’re feeling like something small, you can go for the demitea. If you’re feeling really grown up, you can add $8 to the Grande High Tea and get a glass of prosecco or a mimosa to go with all of the perks of the tea.

The next time you’re in Kits, do yourself a solid and fly over to Neverland. One final tip: in the Vancouver Entertainment Coupon book (a book that is usually sold in local schools for fundraising), there is a coupon for buy one high tea, get one free. It really makes it worth your while, and just makes everything that much more delicious!

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14 Sports

Liza Siamer Peak Associate

“We can be a very special group this year.”

Clint Schneider, head coach

Nick Bondi Sports Editor

Nick Bondi / Sports Editor

sports@the-peak.ca

Sports

October 3, 2016

Austin Cozicar Peak Associate

Nick Bondi Sports Editor

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15

16 Diversions

Across 1. Employ a dirk 5. Lock of Goldilocks 10. Concert props 14. Elegant 15. Mariner's need 16. Wife in ''A Doll's House'' 17. Group member 18. Baku is its capital 20. Extinct creature 22. Struck, to King James 23. At all times 24. Catholic tribunal 26. College at Cambridge 29. Mbabane is its capital 34. Spell casters 36. Operatic prince 37. Kanga's tyke 38. Enthusiastic 39. Burdened 41. Pats on lightly 42. Understanding 43. Ready for anything 44. Fit for the table 46. Much of a Patagonian's motherland 49. Sisters' three LAST WEEKâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S SOLUTION

50. Glasgow girl 51. Alexander, e.g.

53. Attribute 56. Lures 60. Chetnik's country 63. Keystone State city 64. Jaunty 65. Embellish 66. Ocean route 67. Important times 68. Performed obeisance 69. Bowie's model wife Down 1. Seedy sector 2. Salad ingredient, perhaps 3. Japan, Germany and Italy 4. Improved 5. Deal in baseball

6. Sweeney Todd's tools 7. Setting in Haydn's ''The Creation'' 8. John's title 9. Express despair, in a way 10. Kind of cracker 11. Muddy Waters' ''Got My ___ Working'' 12. Type of fall 13. Sound upstairs 19. Active state 21. Completed 24. Fury 25. Important layer 26. R&B singer Khan 27. Bar used as a pry 28. Handing out pink slips 30. Spread 31. Some riding horses 32. Aristocratic

Maia Odegaard / Business Manager

maia@the-peak.ca

33. Prescribed amounts 35. Louvers 40. ''Lucky Jim'' author 41. Former British prime minister Benjamin 43. Camping menaces 45. Honeybunch 47. T.S. and George 48. Dress code concern 52. Witness' spot 53. It can be bold 54. Sorry sort 55. Pearl Mosque site 56. Declare 57. Hit the books 58. Grammy winner Turner 59. Witnessed 61. You may see a reaction in one 62. Trouble

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Sports

October 3, 2016

Liza Siamer Peak Associate

â&#x20AC;&#x153;It has been incredible to go from 2012 to being in contention for the NCAA tournament.â&#x20AC;?

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18 Humour

Janis McMath / Humour Editor

humour@the-peak.ca

Ah, behold the long-revered human body parts: the breasts. With their supple curves and eyepopping areolae, they have made many gasp with delight throughout the ages. Here are five reasons why they should be out in their splendid glory.

1. Bras are basically boob prisons.

Don’t give me any of this “You need a bra for support” bullshit. There is a metal wire under my boobs and it’s just annoying AF, OK? There are also days when that metal wire unleashes its poking wrath upon my titties and my entire day goes to hell — which is exactly where bras should burn and rot. It’s where they belong.

2. They need to do the jiggly wiggly.

Boobs jiggle, and they need to be free to jiggle whenever they damn well please. If the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms includes mobility rights, those rights should apply to my boobs.

3. Boobs are beautiful works of art.

Who wants to look at a corporate, manufactured Victoria’s Secret piece of lingerie when the parts that it will be covering up are the real stars of the show? They are the original Victoria’s Secret angels, excuse you, and they will be having a fashion show of their own.

4. Nipples want to say hello sometimes.

If there was a body part equivalent of a sad child wearing a dunce cap sitting in a corner, it would be the nipples. Why did we create undergarments that hide them away and create an illusion of a perfectly smooth boob? I, for one, think that nipples need to have their moment in the spotlight — pointy peaks out of shirts and all.

5. They aren’t sexual objects. *feminist mic drop*

Humour

Written by Vincent Justin Mitra - Illustration by Tia Young - Layout by Phoebe Lim

October 3, 2016

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20 Last Word

Tamara Connor / Features Editor

features@the-peak.ca