CONTENTS MAY 8, 2019
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EDITORIAL
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Mikkel Hyldebrandt Editorial Director mikkel@peachatl.com Brian Sawyer Graphics
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From the Editor We have come a long way from times when being called a geek or nerd was harmful. Online gaming and the general mainstreaming of sci-fi, fantasy, comics, and adventure have paved the way for a collective tribe that has validated pretty much all facets of fandom. Just look at the recent megasuccess of the last Avengers movie, which incorporates all aspects of being a nerd. So yes, we are somehow all in this geek space together. If you want to explore more, you should visit OutlantaCon this coming weekend, the LGBTQ-focused geek, nerd, and fandom convention that has taken place in Atlanta for the last 11 years. We spoke to Michael Stork who is one of the original members of the conference about the fandom festival. Our feature interview this week is with the incredible Melissa Etheridge who is returning with a new album, The Medicine Show. The legendary LGBTQ icon talks inspiration in world crises and her new ‘totally fueled by cannabis’ record. We also hear from Kevin Assam and Mitzi Pennington in this issue, and we even spoke to Lime’s Community Affairs Manager about the addition of electric scooters to Atlanta’s traffic.
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The content of Peach ATL Media is for your general information and use only. It is subject to change without notice. The opinions expressed by any writer, advertiser, or other person appearing in the Peach ATL Media are not necessarily those of this publication, its management or staff. The information and materials appearing in the magazine are not guaranteed or warranted as to accuracy, timeliness, performance, completeness, or suitability of the information and materials found or offered for a particular purpose. It shall be your responsibility to ensure that any products, services, or information available through Peach ATL Media meets your specific requirements. Peach ATL Media is not responsible for claims made by advertisers, content of information, changes, events, and schedules. The magazine contains information and material which is owned by or licensed to Peach ATL Media, including but not limited to articles, advertisements, design, layout, graphics, and logos. No part or portion of Peach ATL Media may be reproduced in any way without the prior written consent of the publisher. Unauthorized use of Peach ATL Media may give rise to claims for damages and or criminal offenses. Your use of the information or materials in Peach ATL Media is strictly at your own risk.
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WE DANCE TO THE BEATS! The fourth edition of the Shaky Beats is bringing you another two-day festival of big names in the electronic music arena. On the heels of last weekend’s Shaky Boots festival, Atlanta’s Central Park will become the epicenter of well-known EDM artists and up-andcomers on the house and electronic dance music scene at the Shaky Beats Festival. The lineup will feature big names like headliners Martin Garrix, RÜFÜS DU SOL, Big Gigantic, FISHER, and San Holo, but Shaky Beats is also the place to go to discover a slew of up and coming acts like Ekali, What So Not, SNBRN, Gryffin, Vanic, and Squnto. There are even late-night performances at Terminal West to take your day of dancing into the night.
But Shaky Beats goes well beyond the music by transforming Central Park to a comprehensive event space where you can hang out between the performers or for a well-deserved break. Food trucks and bars are located all across the festival campus, and there are plenty of booths with merchandise and activities for lots of fun while you are there. If you opt for the VIP experience, you also get access to prime viewing spots, lounges and luxury indulgences which include access to premium restroom facilities. Go to ShakyBeatsFestival.com to learn more and get your tickets!
The What, When, and Where What: Shaky Beats Festival When: May 10-12 Where: Central Park Atlanta
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(Old Fourth Ward)
Fabulous Fandom After more than ten years, Outlantacon is still going strong. The queer-centered fandom and ‘nerd’ culture festival features an impressive lineup of shows panels and events – and of course lots of costuming, gaming, and vendors all the while celebrating the LGBTQ aspect of it all. Peach spoke to Michael Stork (social media and website coordinator) about the geeky convention. Photo: outlantacon.org
Tell us a little about the nature of the event. OutlantaCon is an LGBTQ-focused geek, nerd, and fandom convention that has taken place in Atlanta for the last 11 years. What LGBTQ-specific angle does your event take? How does it differ from similar sci-fi/geek events? Outlantacon is similar to other sci-fi/geek events in that we share the same love for a genre, but our panels focus, highlight, and celebrate the LGBTQ(+) component of it. This includes characters, storylines, directors, writers, and the importance of visibility; by making something that was once “taboo” found in mainstream media, we help to create and reinforce equality. Can you tell us any personal stories about how you became involved in this event? Nine years ago I received a call from my best friend Java Green, who was volunteering at the convention, he explained to me that they had an event, project cosplay, happening that evening and the host, a local drag queen, had an emergency and had to cancel. They needed someone quick to help run the interactive “project runway spoof.” Knowing that I was the Emcee for Lips down on Dixie, Atlanta’s longest running rocky horror picture show, and accustomed to facilitating big wild groups while mostly doing it off the cuff I was the first choice. I hurried to the convention, hosted an amazing show, and I never left. I stayed on with the convention first as an attendee, then a host, then a guest, and eventually took over as “Game Show Track Director.” My job was to be the ambassador of fun. Which was great because I always have an amazing time at the convention and now I was helping others do it too. Last year the convention elected me as ConChair for 2018, and I would pick up the torch that they had carried on their own for so long. I am hooked. Running the convention this year has been amazing, and I can’t wait to see people enjoy all the hard work we have put into it this year. Should LGBTQ people who have no interest in geek-related culture attend this event? Why? 10 | 05.08.19
Absolutely! We have something for everyone at Outlantacon. We have a film festival where we receive submissions from creators where it is against the law to be their authentic self. These creators risk their lives to create content they burn to share with the world, and Outlantacon serves as a platform for them to do so. We have an amazing culture and activism track that includes guest and resources that everyone in our community should educate themselves with. We have game shows, drag shows, and interactive sports where you can laugh along with friends of any age and have a good time. And I’ve been to some awesome room parties over the years — unofficial of course, wink. As a whole, how has ‘geek space’ changed acceptance-wise while you’ve been involved? The geek community has always been awesome, and they have been the most open to acceptance and change than most other groups over the last 20 years. We can all show better ally-ship (even among our own community) by celebrating people similarities and differences, by understanding that there are more things that bring us together than push us apart, and realize that we only get a short time in this crazy world so it should be spent doing good and not spewing hate. What’s special about this year’s event? Every year is special as it includes all new panels, events, shows, and new friendships. This year is unique for me as it is my first full year as ConChair, and I’m ready to see a year’s worth of planning in the flesh. What would you like to see take place in the future for Outlantacon? The future is bright for Outlantacon, and I am ready to create more content, more guests, and a hotel filled with hundreds of my favorite folks! -Outlantacon will be held at the Renaissance Concourse Atlanta Airport Hotel on May 10-12. More info on programming and membership at outlantacon.org.
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GIRL TALK
AN INTERVIEW WITH GARRISON STARR By Gregg Shapiro
Singer/songwriter Garrison Starr, a Grammy-nominee for her songwriting work on Margaret Cho’s American Myth album, is back in a big way. Girl I Used to Be, Starr’s highly-anticipated new album, is scheduled for release later this year. Working once again with producer Neilson Hubbard, Starr recorded the album in Nashville over the course of five days. Before the album is released, Starr is heading out on tour with fellow Tennessean Lolo on the “Tennessee Queens” tour during the summer months. I had the pleasure of catching up with her shortly before the tour began. In order to give readers some renewed perspective on your background, I want to begin by saying that if anyone can attest to the changes in the music world it would be you. 22 years ago, your major-label debut Eighteen Over Me was released on Geffen. From there you moved to Virgin and then Vanguard. Looking back on that part of your career, please say something about that experience and how it affected your work. I’ve thought about that a lot, actually. Especially in making this new record and feeling like I’ve gotten back to myself, in a way. My favorite thing to do is to pick up my acoustic guitar and play and sing. I think I started trying to divorce myself from the acoustic guitar as I moved from label to label. When I got signed, and I had a lot of buzz around me when I was first starting out, the Lilith Fair thing was big. The female singer/songwriters had blossomed. When I came on the scene, it was just starting to fade out. Alanis Morissette came around and it was an edgier, more indie rock sound. Although my record was more rock than it was Lisa Loeb/singer/songwriter at that time because I was so angry [laughs], it was still based around me and the 12 | 05.08.19
acoustic guitar. That was my primary vehicle for singing and playing. I’ve always worked out my issues in my songs. My story, growing up in the fundamentalist Christian church and not having anybody to talk to or share my pain or anxiety with, I started writing songs. As I got into the music industry, the business of music is focused on aesthetics and numbers and other things that are contrary to creating art and to being free and exploratory. When I look back over the years, I see myself kind of dumbing myself down to try and figure out what was going to work. At the time, I didn’t see it that way. Over the years, however, I can see myself trying to change or conform a little to bit to what would fit the industry. After my second record, I felt, for myself, that I had trouble getting my foot in somewhere. I felt like I was one step behind what the industry was doing. I was doing my own thing, but not quite fitting in in some way. At least that’s how I feel about it looking back on it. The major-label thing was tough. I think I was so unsure about who I was at the time because I was so confused from the rejection of the church. That rejection was a direct assault on who I am as a person.
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No, I didn’t. Honestly, the way the songs on this record came about was I was writing them thinking they were going to be someone else’s songs. What I believed was that nobody wants to put out my records. Nobody thinks I’m relevant. I was telling myself that I wasn’t a viable artist anymore. My time had passed. As I started collaborating, I thought to myself, “You’re just going to be a songwriter now. This is what my career will be from now on”. Then I looked back at these other songs I’d written with other people that nobody is doing anything with. This X artist isn’t cutting this great song that we wrote for them. No one’s recording it and no one’s pitching it, so I’ll take it. I made a list of 10 or 11 songs that meant something to me over the last several years. I realized that I had a body of work that’s strong. These are my songs, not somebody else’s songs. Taking all these songs, on which I collaborated with other songwriters, I realized that all these other people helped me be the best that I could be. To be able to take these songs and make them mine, to be able to say the words I needed to say at the time. I wasn’t planning on making a record. I got all of these songs together and thought, “Wow! I do have something to say and this is it.”
The industry can be really harsh in that way, too. When the industry decides that something is no longer relevant, they just shut it down. You have described your forthcoming new album Girl I Used to Be, your first solo album since 2007’s The Girl Who Killed September, as “an actual completed thought, sequenced as a storyline, with nine songs on it”. At a time when the model for purchasing music is iTunes singles at 99¢ a pop, please say something about making a traditional album.
Finally, Garrison, I’d like to ask you about being a part of the queer southern female singer/songwriter tradition, which includes the Indigo Girls, Michelle Malone, Mary Gauthier, Brandy Clark, H.C. McEntire, Lucy Dacus and Sarah Shook. Can you please say something about your place in that realm and the importance of being out as a queer southern artist?
I don’t know what my place is. I hope I have a place. What I want to say is that I’m proud to be from Mississippi. I really am. Because I think Mississippi is special. I think that people from Mississippi have an unspoken sort of connection. It’s like in the movie “Mississippi Burning”. When the preacher says to them, “Hey, y’all, we have a To me, that’s what a record is. You listened to a record system around here and you’re fucking it up. Y’all need to from beginning to end. I think of a record as a whole story. get out of here. We have a way that we communicate and That’s how I used to listen to music. I got invested in the it works for us.” The reason I bring up that example is that whole story. When Neilson (Hubbard) and I made this I feel like people in Mississippi, and maybe it’s all of the record, we sequenced it like it was a storybook. It has a South, but people in Mississippi have an unspoken bond. first chapter and a last chapter; it’s a piece of art. There’s a We have a language; we have a thing. We may not agree through-line, a story. People can pick it apart if they want with each other, but for the most part, it’s not going to to, but when you look at it as a whole picture it makes keep us from stepping up or having a conversation when sense. That’s what a record means to me. To me, it should it’s needed. Or for helping each other out when we need be something from which you can take the pieces out, but help. That’s something I’ve always experienced in my time when you put it together as a puzzle it makes a picture. It’s in Mississippi. I’ll also say that I had to leave the South not just a bunch of random pieces that fit together. It’s a because I was so hurt and angry by what happened to me deliberate story. I personally love that about records. That’s that I had to leave. I hope that I have a place, that I’ve my experience of listening to music. If you listen to (Neil been honest enough in my music. That I’ve somehow paved Young’s) Harvest, you’re not just listening to one song from the way for younger artists to be free to be themselves. I the album your entire life, you’re probably listening to the left because I was dying inside. Should I have tried to stay whole record; popping it on the record player and letting and fight? I don’t know. I’ve always tried to be honest in it play all the way through. It seems to me that people are my music and be myself and stand up for what I believe is craving real stories and authenticity again. You talked a bit right, regardless of the situation. I hope that I’ve done that. about the church. The incredible “The Devil In Me”, which I hope my music gives people something to hold onto, just opens your new album Girl I Used to Be, is particularly timely, like music has always given that to me. given the rise of religious fundamentalism and the ongoing banning of conversion therapy and such. Did you realize at Garrison Starr performs May 15 at Eddie’s Attic in Decatur. the time you were co-writing the song with Carly Paige that this was going to be such a timely composition? 14 | 04.24.19
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SCOOTING ATLANTA
Photo: Laurie Sermos, Lime Scooters and ebikes have quickly become an intricate part of the Atlanta traffic landscape. Peach spoke to Lime’s Community Affairs Manager, Nima Daivari, about the rollout, usage, and challenges. Tell us about a little bit about the rollout of the Lime scooters in Atlanta. We rolled out our Lime-S electric scooters in Atlanta in June 2018, and the adoption has been absolutely amazing. In just the first six months we had 85,500+ unique Lime riders! Anyone who’s in Atlanta knows that Lime isn’t the only operator in the city, so to have almost 100,000 unique riders in six months is simply incredible. On February 1, 2019, the City commenced its 12-month pilot program for shareable dockless mobility devices (scooters/ebikes), and we commend the City of Atlanta for allowing scooters to operate during the time they drafted an ordinance to regulate the industry. We believe taking that kind of time to evaluate usage helps cities draft sensible ordinances and the Atlanta City Council, Mayor, and Department of City Planning did exactly that.
the scooter properly and use the Lime app to end the ride. To hold riders accountable, the Lime app requires users to upload a photo of where they properly parked their scooter to end their ride. Scooters in Atlanta cost $1 to unlock and $0.15 per minute to ride. The average Lime ride is about 10 minutes, so the average Lime fare is about $2.50. Additionally, we have a nationwide low-income program called Lime Access where anyone who is on any state or federal assistance (Social Security, food stamps, Medicaid, discounted utility bills, etc.) qualifies for 50% off all their rides making the average low-income Lime ride about $1.25. More information on Lime Access is available at www.li.me/ community-impact There have been some challenges with how and where to ride the scooters - how do you address those? We actually think the City of Atlanta regulations, coupled with our Terms of Service, address concerns about how and where to ride. The ordinance is clear that scooters are meant to be ridden on the roads, not the sidewalks. We at Lime feel the same way; our products are intended for bike lanes, multi-use paths, and other places you would traditionally ride a bicycle. Some people have a form factor resistance to scooters, but the easiest way to think about scooters is as the 2.0 version of the bicycle. Lime scooters are capped at 15 mph in Atlanta, so in fact, many cyclists move at faster speeds than scooters. Are the scooters safe? Shouldn’t people wear helmets when riding them? Yes, and yes. We have a vertically integrated scooter; we custom design, manufacture, and maintain our fleet though full-time international, national, regional, and local hires to ensure our scooters are built for commercial grade usage. When it comes to helmets, we’ve given away over 250,000 helmets worldwide through our Respect the Ride campaign, and I’m frequently at local events giving away helmets like at MARTA’s Get On Board Day in late April or throuh our monthly free scooter lessons. For more information on our free classes, please email georgia@li.me. As a Community Affairs Manager, how do you see a company like Lime getting involved in the community – and particularly the LGBTQ community? I’m always looking for partnership opportunities in Atlanta, LGBTQ or otherwise. We’ve partnered with the Center for Visually Impaired, Frazer Center, Trees Atlanta, Atlanta BeltLine Partnership, and many others. One partnership that I’m very proud of is our partnership with AID Atlanta whereby we help service their clients who have transportation access and equity issues. If someone has transportation difficulty, they are less likely to keep their appointments, get their medications, and maintain their health status. I’m always willing to meet with anyone who thinks their organization has an equity, access, transportation or environment component that needs addressing, so I encourage LGBTQ organizations to contact me at georgia@li.me.
How does the Lime scooter service work? Using a Lime scooter couldn’t be easier! All you have to do is download the Lime app via the Apple Store or Google Play and set up your account. Each scooter has its own GPS device within it, so when you open the app, it will show you all the nearby Lime scooters. You then use the Lime app to scan the unique QR code on the handlebars which unlocks the scooter. Each scooter has a hand brake (like a bicycle) and a throttle (like a gas pedal). To prevent a scooter from taking off too quickly, Lime has added a safety measure so that the throttle only works after you’ve self-propelled the scooter a few feet; after you give it a couple kicks the throttle will work. Just like all throttles, you don’t need to depress it all the way; the harder you press, the faster it will go, up to 15 miles per hour - the user is always in control. Anything you’d like to add? I’m single, so Peach readers should hit me up; I’m not above When you’re done with your ride, you simply have to park scooting on a first date. 16 | 05.08.19
Photo Courtesy of ES Collection, PR
Melissa Etheridge Has Your Medicine By Chris Azzopardi Photos: Lauren Dukoff
Ain’t it heavy? Ain’t the night heavy? The opioid crisis, national anxiety, school shootings. Our political zoo. The general feeling that the world is always, probably ending. Because she’s a human being even though she’s Melissa Etheridge, this all weighed considerably on the 57-year-old LGBTQ icon when she went into the studio to confront the disheartening present-day with a state of mind she calls “balanced,” resulting in The Medicine Show, her first album in three years.
There were deep self-reflective dives into her past, reframing older experiences with a newer, richer perspective, and there was last year’s tragic Parkland shooting, which happened while she was in the recording studio. To find these songs, wherever Melissa Etheridge finds them (not even Melissa Etheridge knows), she blazed cannabis because, she says, why the hell wouldn’t she? But th e real roots of The Medicine Show grow from a place of renewal, reconciliation, reckoning, compassion and healing. From a stop in March in Copenhagen while on her Yes I Am 25th Anniversary Tour, Etheridge spoke about seeking answers in inner space, the statement she knew she was making with 18 | 05.01.19
Amy Grant, and being proud of the fact that she led the way for a song called “Pussy Is God.” When we last spoke, you were in the early stages of writing The Medicine Show. You told me then you didn’t want to create a protest album, that it was going to put a face on some serious issues, which it does. Why take that approach with these topics? Because – oh gosh – it goes to your soul more than just preaching something, saying, “We should do this.” People are gonna turn off the minute they hear a “should,” you know? And so making it – that’s art. That’s my art. You make it personal, and then that’s how you change hearts and minds, I think.
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As a music consumer, what have you been connecting with in terms of songs that speak to our current times? Well, I do listen to Kendrick Lamar. I listen to a Sara Bareilles wanted to see herself be lot of hip-hop.
brave. Of course, she summoned you
Some thosesame hip-hopatop sounds into yourtake own no muto doof the a have bop even thatsnuck wouldn’t sic years. but she’s been a work in progress forover anthe answer, I’m not veryShe goodfollowed at makingher it, but I love to listen to it. With herself. own be-bold guidance somefor help, make it! album, But even “Medicine Show,” the song, herI can fifth solo Amidst the Chaos, is kind of a rap. So I listen to (hip-hop). Boy, social media now making timely feminist assertions (“Armor”) just really connects you up with other artists, and I’ve been and using coded language to write songs that watching the paths of other folks. And even pop artists like could about but Kesha, thebe choices shelove made, thewere thingsactually that affectwritten, the things mournfully, longingly, with a specific loved that affect people and then the art that they make fromone it. I in mind: Obama. Amidst thethem Chaos is wouldn’t say I Barack was listening to anybody else and speaking Bareilles’ first studio album in six Iyears, thetheir about their times (while making this album). listen to experiences of the time. The Blessed Unrest. (She last being 2013’s
also wrote the music and lyrics for Broadway’s
ByWaitress examining the the world right now throughopened your ownin personal lens, Musical, which 2015.) did The Medicine Show bring you closer to any kind of truths about the world and the subjects that you wrote about? I’m pretty solid about what truth is and how the way that I hold my own experience and the way that I define my experience and perceive it is the most important thing. So, taking care of how I receive things is one of the reasons it’s hard for me to condemn anyone else. It makes more sense to me to experience and speak of finding a way to stay out of being a victim and stay out of being a judge. You gotta ride right in the middle. And that’s balance. I like the word balance, because we’re constantly given opportunities to define ourselves – and we can define ourselves as a victim of something or we can judge others, or we can understand that I make my own life, I make my own choices, and how I’m going to be affected by life. So you can’t really blame anybody else or become a victim. But that’s a whole other conversation. That’s, like, an hour-long conversation. I recall reading that after your battle with breast cancer you went on an identity and self-love journey. And many of these songs look inside yourself as well as outside. Which songs for you fit into that journey that you’ve been on since beating breast cancer? My first instinct is to say all of them, even “The Last Hello,” which is just an observation. I was in the studio when the Parkland shooting happened, and their choices – the way that they chose to not be a victim and to come out and say “we need change” – affected me deeply in seeing, “Ah, yes, I’m finally seeing outside of myself,” and what I believed in is how we can move forward and create change. So all of the songs, even the subjects that might seem outside of myself, all come from this journey of mine. How did your song for Parkland end up being a song about the survivors and not the victims? When I heard the surviving students, and when I saw Emma Gonzalez and David Hogg get up and speak from their hearts the next day, it was so powerful. I remember reading where there over 150,000 survivors of school shootings – survivors! – and I thought, “Oh gosh, that’s a lot of people alive who are affected by this and how deeply they are affected,” and so 20 | 05.08.19
instead of writing a sad song about the victims I said, “What about these survivors and how can one give them hope?” On “The Medicine Show,” you say, “Come on down to mama’s farm,” referencing your own marijuana business, called Etheridge Farms. What would I find on mama’s farm? You would find medicine. You would find an interest in a growing desire to bring plant medicine to the world, to have people understand health in a different way. And though we talk about – wooo! – getting stoned and people only talk about it in that little area, there is so much healing and understanding and consciousness-raising and awareness that plant medicine brings. I’ve always told people we’re trying to go to outer space but all the answers are in inner space. How does marijuana enhance the songwriting experience for you? And did it on this album? Yeah! This whole album is totally fueled by cannabis. Oh goodness, yes. (Laughs) For one, it quiets the left side of my brain; the left side of our brain is in charge of keeping us alive, keeping us from stepping out in front of a car; it worries about the future, it regrets the past, it’s that voice (saying) “you’re no good.” Its job is to keep us alive, so it worries. And cannabis, scientifically, I can go into detail: Cannabis quiets that part of your mind and it allows the intuitive (to kick in), the right side, which is all in the now. In the infinite now. Which is really all there is. And that place is where I can open up to the thoughts and instincts and inspiration. I mean, I’ve been writing songs for a long time and I’m the first one to understand that they come from nowhere. (Laughs) I can’t explain to you how I got that idea. But that’s what it does. It quiets it. When have you written a song high that you didn’t think you could’ve pulled off otherwise? (Laughs) I don’t know! I’ve never thought about it that way. I suppose I could pull it off in another way, without it – but why? That’s a funny question. I guess I wonder if it really allows you to tap into something that you don’t think you could without quieting the left side of the brain first. Well, I don’t think I have to be in the world of cannabis to do that. I think one can meditate and one can get to where plant medicine can get them but, again, why? (Laughs) You’re scoring the stage adaptation of the 1988 film Mystic Pizza, starring Julia Roberts. Are you done writing it? Oh no, I just started writing it. Once I said “yes” to doing it, they made a big press release. I was like, “Oh my god, I haven’t even started.” What’s the connection between the story and what you bring to the table as a musical and lyrical artist? What I liked about it is it’s a very strong woman story. I went back and I watched the movie, and I remember it making a big impression in the ’80s because it was three lead women and their stories, and it’s about immigrants and it’s about taking the Old World into America and keeping those secret ingredients. Then it’s about the freedom to go find your own dream. It’s a beautiful little story that I think has some beautiful moments, and it’s my first try at this.
As someone who’s won two Grammys and also performed during the telecast, was a change palpable this year for women and the LGBTQ community? It’s easy to look around and see a lot of change in how our society’s holding women and sort of the empowerment that women have felt since the presidential election of 2016. Because you feel that slipping back and you’re like, “No, no, no, no, we were moving forward,” so you see a lot of empowerment in #MeToo and just equality and equal pay and in the music business. The music business is funny. How so? It’s run by 90 percent men, and so it was sort of the last place (to change). And the men in charge of the Grammys, they’ve been around for a long time (laughs) and we witnessed (Neil) Portnow’s, “Well, women need to step up” comment. I wanted to put on my album (and say), “Well, Neil, did I step up?” But you feel a shift from even opinions like his? So much. It’s an awareness. It’s a, “Oh, we never thought about it that way,” and that’s what’s happening. I don’t think anyone did it nefariously. I don’t think they said, “We gotta keep the women down.” They just didn’t think about it. And that’s the problem right there: The myopic view of music, as just men making music. I myself have even looked and gone, “Wow, I didn’t think it could be that way either.” It’s been a real change for the last two years. It’s been pretty amazing. You and recent Grammy winner Brandi Carlile went back and forth on Twitter about how much you admire each other. She actually recorded background vocals for your 2004 song “Lucky,” but you didn’t know each other at the time, right? Yeah, no. Josh Freese was producing the track and brought her in. She was in Seattle, but then I ran into her at some music convention thing where she ran up to me backstage and said, “Oh my god, I’m such a huge fan.” I’ve been watching her career since then, and I love her music so much and I would love to do more with her and would love to be in more contact with her. I’m just so proud of her.
When I think about your collaborations, one of the most unexpected to me is your duet with Amy Grant on “You Can Sleep While I Drive” in 2000. Growing up, it meant a great deal to me as an Amy fan. My gay world and my Christian world were colliding. At the time were you aware of the significance of a major Christian artist performing with a very out lesbian? Absolutely! I met Amy in 1988 at a hotel in Amsterdam. We hung out and talked, and she’s just a sweetheart and a big friend. I’d seen her around at things, and when she and Vince (Gill, who she married in 2000 after a divorce from Gary Chapman in 1999) got together she got flack from the Christian community, and so she always had the belief that it’s un-Christian to hate someone for loving and did not stop for one moment from saying, yes, she would come and sing with me. I thought it was huge and I was very aware of what it meant. Looking ahead, you’re headlining the WorldPride Closing Ceremony, which takes place June 30 in Times Square. What kind of message do you plan on bringing to the event? I’m doing three songs and I’m probably gonna stick to the big gay songs. (Laughs) I’ll have to look and see what the audience is like. At the moment I know I start the thing off that night, so maybe … I really don’t know. It just means a lot to be there. It means a lot that there’s a thing called WorldPride. Just amazing being there, and I’m just gonna love being in the presence of my brothers and sisters. Which LGBTQ artists give you hope for the future for LGBTQ inclusion in music? I can’t tell you how excited I am about King Princess. (Laughs) Ahh! Dig her! My daughter’s really into her, and so we’re listening and all of a sudden “Pussy Is God” comes on and I just said, “Well, I’m glad that 25 years ago I did what I did so that today a woman could release ‘Pussy Is God.’” It’s like, so my work here is done. Thank you. -As editor of Q Syndicate, the international LGBTQ wire service, Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Cher, Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. His work has also appeared in GQ, Vanity Fair and Billboard. Reach him via Twitter @chrisazzopardi.
peachATL.com | 21
HEIFER REVIEW @ JOE'S ON JUPITER PHOTOS: ANDREA DWYER
22 | 05.08.19
Register, volunteer and/or donate to a participant at actioncyclingatl.org
SUNDAY SERVICE SEASON OPENER @ SISTER LOUISA'S PHOTOS: MH
24 | 05.08.19
In the guise of satiric exploitation-horror, the all-female cast of The Secretaries takes an unflinching look at the warping cultural expectations of femininity. Pretty Patty Johnson is thrilled to join the secretarial pool at the Cooney Lumber Mill under the iron-fisted leadership of sultry office manager Susan Curtis. But she soon begins to feel that all is not right—the enforced diet of Slim-Fast shakes, the strange clicking language between the girls, the monthly disappearance of a lumberjack. By the time Patty discovers murder is part of these office killers’ skill set, it’s too late to turn back!
By The Five Lesbian Brothers
MAY 2-18, 2019
Tickets: $15 and up Out Front Theatre Company 999 Brady Avenue, Atlanta
www.OutFrontTheatre.com
READY 4 HOPE BEAR-B-Q @ THE HERETIC PHOTOS: MH PHOTOS: MH
26 | 05.08.19
Grab a coffee, coffee take a survey,
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David is from Loganville, Georgia, and he now lives in Atlanta. He has worked as an environmental advocate, law professor, and now works as an attorney for the disabled. He enjoys traveling, being outdoors, and spending time with his family. He also enjoys living in the city where his favorite spots to hang out are Piedmont Park, the High Museum, and anywhere he can dance!
@justdavidnbd
David Deganian
30 | 05.01.19
Who Still Keeps a Joystick!? BY KEVIN ASSAM Photo: Artem Kim
Here are the cheat codes you never asked for and the relationship walkthrough you almost certainly need - because starngers really do fall madly in love with livestreamers and gamer personalities. Enjoy!
I’m falling for my YouTube video gamer — he livestreams his walkthroughs and provides gaming commentary. I partake in online hangouts and consider myself to be a top fan. What’s the best way to reach out? Is it that total babe from Ohio? Live streamers are already wary of dealing with weirdos who push digital boundaries and try to develop unwanted relationships. You definitely do not want to flood his livestreams with a barrage of flirty comments. Fortunately, both YouTube and his porn subscriptions require him to have an active personal email. I would find it through his channel profile or website and send a brief note of adoration and respect. You could even mail a beautiful handwritten letter to his P.O Box. Ask your mother to write it if you flunked penmanship. Just please do not staple condoms to the letter or do any weird things like that. Unless they’re limited edition and sanctioned by EA Games. I thought I was looking at an image of Spiderman’s mask on a daddy’s t-shirt. Turns out, he was straight, and the image was actually of a woman’s bust in a bikini top. What does this mean? It means those threats of conversion therapy were doubly empty since you’re super duper gay and unlikely to switch sides. Spiderman’s mask is the optical illusion alternative to the Kinsey Scale. I spent a few thousand dollars on my elaborate virtual reality pornographic setup. Should I send it back and invest in the real deal instead? A healthy sex life is like a box of chocolates. Sometimes you open it and all of a sudden the 32 | 05.01.19 04.24.19
chocolates start glitching out and you realize they’re holograms and the box itself is just the battery source. But you know what? You keep reaching for those intangible chocolates and for whatever reason they make you feel so good. Apply the analogy here. I found one of those old school computer joysticks glistening in my partner’s bedside drawer. Should I return his surprise birthday package of higher end adult toys and go shopping for computer parts instead? Let the old school times roll. Sometimes it’s the cheap gag dildo that gets the job done. Other times it’s the neglected joystick found at a serial killer’s yard sale. Either works. My boyfriend tagged and thanked his ex-partner in a Happy Siblings Day post. Just, why? Incest? Pure unadulterated hatred? Maybe this is the time to get paranoid. All those hours spent watching The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel while your boyfriend suffered without a tuggy wuggy. If you’re unaware that they’re so close, he thinks of his ex as “family” then what the hell have you been doing? Investigate and keep an eye on your man. -Kevin is a middling writer but top-notch interviewer. His ideas on love and relationships are mostly fueled by his wild imagination. He often orders dessert first!
peachATL.com | 33
“Dungeions & Drag Queens” I recently went to a convention in Budapest that I mistook to be a swingers’ get-together. It turned out to be a comic book and gaming convention called A Szuz. I met some interesting people and fell in love with their nerdy ways. I had a ball and got wasted a bunch. I learned a lot about the culture and mannerisms one must have in order to fit into this lifestyle of exclusivity. The convention center that housed this convention was a maze of dealer shops selling you their merchandise, celebrities I’ve never heard of, and know-italls arguing with everyone about Star Trek Wars. I can say without a doubt; the entire thing was a whirlwind of geeky fandom and was all made better once I took some edibles. I decided to share my moments of this convention in Budapest to shed light on a culture most people don’t fully experience. My first day in Budapest, I met up with a local dealer I chatted with on Reddit. That website is great for anonymous trolling and finding the best dealers in foreign countries. My dealer, Hanna Füks, was a big gaming enthusiast and was also attending the convention. She said the biggest tip she could give a noob (new-comer in Nerd-language) would be to never try to correct someone who’s talking about a show, movie, or game franchise unless you have receipts that prove you’re correct to argue. She explains that convention-goers love to correct others and sometimes things go sour really quick if you tell someone they’re wrong. “Geeks are sensitive creatures, so if they say something, just nod and say ‘that’s so cool,’” Hannah advises, “They love to hear people think they’re cool.” With Hanna’s advice under my belt and her edibles surging through my bloodstream, I marched into the convention halls to become at-one-with-the-people. It didn’t take me long to notice many patrons were dressing up as popular fictional characters. I ran into a burly man dressed as Sailor Moon, only to be corrected that he was, in fact, Sailor Mercury. I quickly nodded in agreement and got him to explain the phenomenon called “cosplay.” It’s essentially Halloween anytime you want. Sailor Burly-Mercury, real name Hans Ziladle, was headed over to the gaming room where a heated tournament of Dungeons & Dragons was already in-progress. Between the twenty-sided dice and the Bawls energy drinks, I knew I was in foreign territory, but I curious. Everyone seemed to be so invested in whatever it was that was happening. The excited shouts got me in a mood for a drink. If you haven’t been to a convention before, you’ll be surprised that there is a minibar around every corner. Alcohol is truly the invisible bond between all walks of life (except Muslims). I chatted up the bartender, who was dressed as a Blanche Devereaux-meets-Cat Woman crossover. She asked if I would be attending any of the dance parties happening later that night. The most-popular being Dungeons & Dragons-themed called “Dances with Dragons.” I was surprised that any dancing would take place at a convention like this, but I was down to party. I wrapped some bedsheets around me and claimed it was a +5 Sleep-Protection Cloak. The geeks welcomed me as one of their own, and we spent the night dancing and drinking. If you’re lucky enough to go to a convention of a geeky nature, don’t miss out. There’s so much to take in, and so many minibars to visit. Just don’t try to correct anyone about anything.
is the self-proclaimed sex symbol and advice-giving-guru alter ego of came from humble roots of middle America and married into money shortly t of college. Her late husband’s fortune allows her to travel the world and nlightenment one normally gets from actually working for their money. Mirza 34 | 05.08.19 hose experiences in his life. On occasion, Mirza will perform as Mitzi around
Yours in rolling D12
You deserve Personalized Care & Individual Attention – that’s what we deliver at Family Health Care of Atlanta • Participating in many clinical trials • Certiied HIV Specialist, American Academy of HIV Medicine • 20+ years experience in Family & HIV Care SPECIALIZING IN DERMATOLOGY, STD’S, ANXIETY, DEPRESSION, UROLOGY, PSYCHIATRIC DISORDERS
OCTOBER 11-13,2019 atlantapride.org
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RÜFÜS DU SOL
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TICKET INFO AT
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May 8 – May 15
Lizzo Cuz I Love You Tour Lizzo seems to be everywhere right now, and now she is headed to Atlanta. To promote her latest full-length album, Lizzo comes to the Tabernacle to perform songs from her current and previous records. Thursday, May 9, 8 pm The Tabernacle
STAFF PICK!
The Armorettes Miss Mid-Life Crisis Pageant The Longest Running Camp Drag Show in and outside Atlanta that does it all for charity is back with their latest pageant where you can strut the stage with your talents. Email the Armorettes atthearmorettes@gmail.com or show up to support the ladies of camp drag. Saturday, May 11, 8-10 pm The Heretic
Becoming: A Conversation with Michelle Obama The former First Lady comes to Atlanta to promote her best-selling book and provides you with an opportunity to experience her poise and intellect at a special event. Tickets via Ticketmaster. Saturday, May 11, 8 pm State Farm Arena
OutlantaCon For more than a decade, the convention has offered a fun and welcoming ‘geek space’ and a weekend of excellent fandom programming including writers and comics track, fandom track, activism track, short film festival, a game room, and live entertainment. outlantacon.org May 10-12 Renaissance Concourse Atlanta Airport Hotel
38 | 05.08.19
Atlanta Pride Run - Community Night Joe’s On Juniper hosts a special community night in support of the upcoming Pride Run in June by donating a portion of all sales to the organization. Wednesday, May 15, from 11 am Joe’s On Juniper
MR. HSL 2019 @HERETIC PHOTOS: APRIL RANDALL
40 | 05.08.19
wedding & commitment ceremonies • thirty years experience within our community • in-house award-winning metrotainment bakery • sustainable, local, seasonally-inspired custom menus • experienced, friendly staff of catering professionals • extensive network of award-winning local venues www.epiceventsatlanta.com | 404.991.9128
MIDTOWN 1
Monroe Dr. NE
14
Amsterdam Ave.
NE ve . tA
Piedmont Park
on
11
dm
6 12th St. NE
18
Pi e
Juniper St. NE
14th St. NE
7
9
2
10th St. NE
10
. NE
19
oe Dr
e. NE Piedmont Av
Juniper St . NE
Peachtree St. NE
3
Monr
Charle s Alle n Dr . N E
12 W. Peachtree St. NW
15
16
P o n ce D e Leo n Pl . N E
Spring St. NW
17
4th St. NE
8
13
Ponce De Leon Ave. NE
4
Ponce De Leon Ave. NE
BARS 1 2 3 4
Amsterdam Blake's Bulldogs Friends The T 6 My Sister’s Room 7 Ten Atlanta
Dining 502 Amsterdam Ave NE 227 10th St NE 893 Peachtree St NE 736 Ponce De Leon Ave NE 465 Boulevard SE 66 12th St NE 990 Piedmont Ave NE
10 th & Piedmont Campagnolo Einstein's F.R.O.G.S
clubs 13 Atlanta Eagle
306 Ponce De Leon Ave NE
306 Ponce De Leon Ave NE
14 Urban Body Fitness 500 Amsterdam Ave NE
spa/bath 15 Flex Spa
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991 Piedmont Ave NE 980 Piedmont Ave NE 1077 Juniper St NE 931 Monroe Cir NE
fitness
retail 8 Barking Leather
9 10 11 12
76 4th St. NW
16 17 18 19
G’s Midtown Henry’s Joe's on Juniper La Hacienda
219 10th St NE 132 10th St NE 1049 Juniper St NE 900 Monroe Dr NE
billards/Darts drag dancers leather non-smoking area Patio
When the world throws you Let be your savedandgay.com
Cheshire 23
ansley 21
e
ge
Rd
on tC ir .
Piedmont Park BARS 2043 Cheshire Bridge Rd 1086 Alco St NE 1931 Piedmont Cir NE 2425 Piedmont Rd NE 1842 Cheshire Bridge Rd 1824 Cheshire Bridge Rd
32 33 34 35 36
Midtown Moon Felix's The Hideaway Mixx Oscar's
805 Lambert Dr. NE, Suite A 2205 Cheshire Bridge Rd 2069 Cheshire Bridge Rd 1739 Cheshire Bridge Rd 2201 Faulkner Rd NE
Spa / bath 2103 Faulkner Rd NE 2135 Liddell Drive NE
1492 Piedmont Ave NE 1510 Piedmont Ave NE 1544 Piedmont Ave NE 1492 Piedmont Ave NE 1510 Piedmont Ave NE
Dining 38 Eclectic Bistro
Fitness 30 Gravitee Fitness
NE
.
clubs 28 Heretic 29 Tokyo Valentino
e. nt mo ed
39 38
Retail 26 Barking Leather 27 Southern Nights
41
Pi
28 20
Dining 24 Las Margaritas 25 Roxx
Av
ge Rd Brid hire
r.
E
Ches
.N
.
25
BJ Roosters Opus 1 Tripps Woof's
31 Manifest 4 U 42 The Den
35
24
id Br
Dr
Rd
BARS 20 21 22 23
40
32
oe
hir
36
nr
dm
es
ll D
31 er
Mo
Pi e
29
Ch
idde
kn
27
33
. NE
Manchester St. NE
Piedmont Rd. NE
22
42 L
ul
IX
34
x Rd
Fa
26
BL
Le no
30
Lambert Dr.
PU
St.
.
A l co
1600 Piedmont Ave NE 1425 Piedmont Ave NE
Retail 39 Boy Next Door 1447 Piedmont Ave NE 40 Brushstrokes/Pleasures 1510 Piedmont Ave NE
Fitness 41 Equilibrium Fitness
1529 Piedmont Ave, Suite L
NOT SHOWN
Mary's Sister Louisa’s Church Swinging Richards Lips Atlanta
1287 Glenwood Ave SE 466 Edgewood Ave SE 1400 Northside Dr NW 3011 Buford Hwy NE
peachATL.com | 43
A snapshot of Gay Atlanta’s favorite destinations. View their ads in Peach ATL & visit their websites for weekly event listings.
Bars & Clubs MIDTOWN
Retail
AMSTERDAM
amsterdamatlanta.com
EAST ATLANTA, GRANT PARK & EDGEWOOD
502 Amsterdam Ave. NE
ATLANTA EAGLE
MARY’S
marysatlanta.com
BARKING LEATHER AFTER DARK
SISTER LOUISA’S CHURCH
306 Ponce De Leon Ave NE
atlantaeagle.com
306 Ponce De Leon Ave NE
BLAKE’S ON THE PARK
blakesontheparkatlanta.com 227 10th St NE
BULLDOGS
1287 Glenwood Ave SE
sisterlouisaschurch.com 466 Edgewood Ave SE
SWINGING RICHARDS swingingrichards.com
893 Peachtree St NE
1400 Northside Dr NW
FRIENDS NEIGHBORHOOD BAR
Dining
friendsonponce-atl.com
736 Ponce De Leon Ave NE
MY SISTER’S ROOM
MIDTOWN
mysistersroom.com
10TH & PIEDMONT
TEN ATLANTA
991 Piedmont Ave NE
66 12th St NE
tenatlanta.com
990 Piedmont Ave NE
THE T
modeltatlanta.com 465 Bouevard SE
10thandpiedmont.com
EINSTEIN’S
einsteinsatlanta.com 1077 Juniper St NE
MIDTOWN barkingleather.com
CHESHIRE BARKING LEATHER barkingleather.com 805 Lambert Dr NE
SOUTHERN NIGHTS VIDEO 2205 Cheshire Bridge Rd NE
ANSLEY BOY NEXT DOOR MENSWEAR boynextdoormenswear.com 1447 Piedmont Ave NE
GCB & PLEASURES
brushstrokesatlanta.com 1510 Piedmont Ave. NE
FROGS CANTINA
Fitness
frogsmidtown.com 931 Monroe Dr
MIDTOWN
CHESHIRE
G’S
URBAN BODY FITNESS
HERETIC
219 10th St NE
hereticatlanta.com
gsmidtown.com
2069 Cheshire Bridge Road
HENRY’S
BJ ROOSTERS
132 10th St NE
bjroosters.com
henrysatl.com
2043 Cheshire Bridge Road NE
JOE’S ON JUNIPER
OPUS 1
1049 Juniper St NE
1086 Alco St NE
TRIPPS
1931 Piedmont Circle N
WOOFS
woofsatlanta.com
2425 Piedmont Road NE
900 Monroe Dr NE
MIDTOWN
CHESHIRE LAS MARGARITAS
lasmargaritasmidtown.com
1824 Cheshire Bridge Rd NE
1544 Piedmont Ave NE
MIXX
mixxatlanta.com
1492 Piedmont Ave NE
OSCAR’S
oscarsatlanta.com
1510 Piedmont Ave NE
44 | 05.01.19
graviteeatl.com
Spas/Baths/Adult
lahaciendamidtown.com
MIDTOWN MOON
THE HIDEAWAY
GRAVITEE FITNESS
LA HACIENDA
ROXX
1510 Piedmont Ave NE
CHESHIRE 2201 Faulkner Rd NE
ANSLEY FELIX’S
500 Amsterdam Ave NE
joesonjuniper.com
1842 Cheshire Bridge Rd NE
1492 Piedmont Ave NE
urbanbodyfitness.com
DEKALB
LIPS ATLANTA
atldragshow.com
3011 Buford Hwy NE
FLEX SPA
flexspas.com
76 4th St NW
CHESHIRE MANIFEST 4U
manifest4u.org
2103 Faulkner Rd NE
THE DEN
thedenatlanta.com
2135 Liddell Drive NE
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peachATL.com | 45
10 GAY AND GEEKY ICONS in real life or in character
Dr. Spock (Zachary Quinto)
Wolverine (Hugh Jackman)
Dr. Horrible (Neil Patrick Harris)
Gandalf (Ian McKellen) Mystique (Jennifer Lawrence)
Green Lantern (Ryan Reynolds) Dumbledore (Michael Gambon)
Doctor Manhattan Xena (Lucy Lawless)
Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp)
Photo: Syfy, 20th Century Fox, Marvel, Paramount, New Line Cinema, Fox, Warner Bros., DC Comics
46 | 05.01.19
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Text your Peach Pits to 540-30-PEACH, or e-mail mikkel@PeachATL.com
Me: What does the teapot light mean? Him: Teapot light?
My name is mispronounced so often that maybe I am the one saying it wrong
Me: Yes, in my car
Him: I don’t understand
Dad Joke Alert This graveyard looks crowded. People must be dying to get in there!
Me: A teapot light came on in my car Him: It’s not a teapot – and you need to get your oil changed too Me: How do you know these things!
Always carry a knife! You know, in case of cheesecake or something!
PrEP is great, but remember it does not protect against other diseases, such as men.
Here’s a way to put a smile on your face: Google dog sniffing camera lens
Asking for a friend Can your soulmate be carbs?
48 | 05.08.19
I’m spending my night making homemade vanilla extract because gay
LIBRA (SEP. 23 - OCT. 22) Deja vu is not that Thai dish that you had two weeks ago. At times you could hit up against communication problems that might not yield easily to discussion or compromise. However, with a fabulous social scene showing up, time spent with friends can help ease any heartache.
SCORPIO (OCT. 23 - NOV. 21) A fortunate trend provides freedom of action and the chance to showcase your skills and abilities to good effect. With a sizzling focus on career, opportunities abound for enhancing work and business success. Fun is a word that will score you few points in scrabble...but then when was life all about scrabble?
SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22 - DEC. 21) TAURUS (APR. 20 - MAY 20) There may be a power struggle going on, so be careful what you say if you want to come out of it looking good. All of that which you experience this weekend will be catalogued under “things not to do in public again”. Seems like damnation awaits you from every angle.
The urge to get away is strong, which could mean getting lost in a daydream, fantasy, good book, or movie. Equally, you’ll be eager to travel to new places and explore
GEMINI (MAY 21 - JUN. 20)
CAPRICORN (DEC. 22 - JAN. 19)
If you pick yourself up by your shoe-strings you are likely to fall flat on your ass. The good and the great come together today and miss you entirely during all their endeavors. Which is a bit sad, really. However, there’s a lively social undertone this week encouraging you to pursue contacts, friendships, and memberships.
Whether you want to or not, this week will have a journey in store for you. In addition, your social life looks livelier than has been in some time. Use this opportunity to network with folks who pull the strings and make the decisions.
CANCER (JUN. 21 - JUL. 22) Directing your energy into the right channels brings opportunities for success. In this case, brainstorming moneymaking ideas and coming up with creative outlets for your talents could substantially increase your income. Butter your bread on both sides so that if the bread falls, you’ll be screwed no matter what.
LEO (JUL. 23 - AUG. 22)
AQUARIUS (JAN. 20 - FEB. 18) While it won’t all be clear sailing in your career, a more focused and incisive frame of mind can make solid headway possible. When talking to others, you might need to ignore their words and instead go with your gut feelings, particularly when sussing out deals or job opportunities.
PISCES (FEB. 19 - MAR. 20)
My gift to you is this wisdom: he who makes love at awkward angle, gets back problems for next day. You’re vibrating to the social buzz of summer and eager to mix and mingle with pals and associates. And you’re truly in your element with your astrological ruler, the Sun, in your sign.
Where your job and lifestyle are concerned, whether you feel a restless stirring within or circumstances beyond your control provide the motivation, it’s to your advantage to embrace the notion of change. Regret can hurt you over a long period. Lament today, but tomorrow must be a day for anger and retribution.
VIRGO (AUG. 23 - SEP. 22)
ARIES (MAR. 21 - APR. 19)
Harmless fun may come back to harm you over the coming weeks. Tailors and Bodybuilders may have a surprise in store for you this week. Also keep on the lookout for butch hairdressers. Meditating and reflecting on your goals and dreams could be particularly rewarding, especially if you’ve been feeling uncertain about a course of action.
You won’t be hospitalized this week, but things may not go as planned. Things might be made all the more difficult as your motivation could limp along on Thursday and Friday. You’ll need to summon your energy and make a determined effort to face up to whatever is bothering you. It’s party time over the weekend!
50 | 05.08.19
By Mikkel Hyldebrandt Trouble in the love department? With sex? Or just people in general? Send us your queries, questions, and problems, and you’ll get answers served straight up and with a little ice.
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Dear Social Mediator Let’s establish two things first: First, although likes and follows on Instagram may suggest that he is gay or bi, it doesn’t prove anything. Second, you don’t know how his relationship works. Assuming your best friend’s dad is still married to a woman, you don’t know if they have an open relationship or an agreement that allows him to live out some of his gay or bisexual fantasies or urges. What seems to be pretty clear is that dad doesn’t know how to use Instagram properly, so that’s where you can step in and be of some help. If you think that a direct conversation is too awkward, direct message him instead. And if that’s too much, just use a made-up fake account for the purpose and let him know that it appears that his gay is showing. Which is totally fine if he wants it too, but not so much if he wants to remain closeted. You should also talk to his son and best friend stressing the fact that although his likes and follows don’t make it so, it could be construed as if he were gay or bisexual. Maybe your friend can have a nice talk to his dad about how social media works – and possibly even about discovering your sexuality!
Dear In the Threes of Love There isn’t a lot of cultural conversation about polyamory, but it is definitely starting to come out, and especially in the LGBTQ community, which is also why you are comfortable being ‘out’ as polyamorous with your friends. But you are certainly right: it just isn’t culturally acceptable or mainstream to be poly. But it might not be as far-fetched as you think to talk to your family about it. You need to assess how you would tell them: compare it telling them that you are gay, and either think back to or imagine how they would react. Remember that a reaction is not the same as a response, so even though delivering this message will cause a reaction (positive or negative), it may not be the response that the conversation ends up with. You also need to talk to your partners here and make sure that they are all on board for this next significant step in your relationship. As you have probably already learned maneuvering the intricacies of living in a thruple; no one should be forced, pressured or rushed to do anything.
y best friend’s dad is recently retired, and he has discovered social media where posts status updates and memes all the time. But when I started to follow him on Instagram (because of the funny memes), I noticed that he follows a lot of younger, hot, and shirtless guys, and even a couple of gay porn stars. It’s probably because he doesn’t realize that his followers can see who he follows, but now I’m wondering if he might be gay and closeted somehow. I mean, should I mention something to him about the ins and outs of how Insta works? And how about his son (my best friend!)? Should I say something to him about my discovery and ensuing suspicions? He is gay himself, but I don’t think he suspects that his dad could be gay at all! Sincerely Social Mediator
y relationship of many years has developed quite a bit over the last couple of years since we started opening up our relationship, and we are now poly. In fact, we have introduced a boyfriend into our relationship, and things are going really well. So well even, that we are all considering moving in together and actually starting a life together all three. Problem is that although we are ‘out’ as poly to our friends, we are not to our families. We also limit what we post on social media to avoid any awkward questions or comments. But I am starting to feel that we should be more open about it all. It is our life and our love, and if our family needs some time to adjust to it, then so be it. I don’t want to hide this gorgeous thing we have got going on here, and I don’t want to conceal that we live happily as a thruple. So where do we start? Sincerely In the Threes of Love
NEED ANSWERS? REACH OUT TO US, AND YOU WILL GET THEM! SEND YOUR BURNING QUESTIONS TO OUR EDITOR AT MIKKEL@PEACHATL.COM.
52 | 05.08.19
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