Surviving the Holidays: A Mental Health Guide for Queer Folks
By Cator Sparks, Life Coach
with someone who gets you, these connections can be the emotional anchor you need. Don’t wait for invitations—create the gatherings you want to attend.
The holiday season brings joy, connection, and celebration—but for many of us, it can also trigger stress, anxiety, and complicated emotions. Whether navigating family dynamics, dealing with rejection, or simply feeling the weight of expectations, protecting your mental health during this time is essential.
The holidays often mean returning to environments where you may not feel fully accepted or understood. Old family patterns can resurface, and the pressure to present a certain version of yourself can be exhausting. Add seasonal stress, financial pressure, and the cultural emphasis on “perfect” family gatherings, and it’s no wonder this time of year can feel overwhelming.
Here are five strategies to help you prioritize your mental health this holiday season:
Set Clear Boundaries You don’t owe anyone unlimited access to your time or energy. Decide in advance what topics are off-limits, how long you’ll stay at gatherings, and what behaviors you won’t tolerate. Practice phrases like “I’d rather not discuss that” or “I need to leave now, but thanks for having me.” Boundaries aren’t walls—they’re acts of self-respect.
Build Your Chosen Family Time Make plans with friends and chosen family who celebrate and support you fully. Whether it’s a Friendsgiving dinner, a holiday movie night, or just coffee
Have an Exit Strategy Before attending potentially problematic family events, plan how you’ll take care of yourself. Bring your own car so you can leave when needed. Identify a supportive friend you can call or text. Book a hotel room instead of staying with family. Knowing you have options reduces anxiety and gives you back control.
Practice Self-Compassion If things don’t go as planned, be gentle with yourself. It’s okay to feel sad, angry, or disappointed. It’s OK to cry, to need space, or to skip events entirely. Your feelings are valid, and taking care of yourself isn’t selfish—it’s necessary.
Seek Professional Support If the holidays consistently trigger depression or anxiety, consider talking to a therapist/coach who understands LGBTQ+ experiences. Many therapists offer flexible scheduling around the holidays, and telehealth makes support more accessible than ever. I am here to help!
Remember: You deserve peace, joy, and acceptance during the holidays— and every day. Protecting your mental health isn’t just survival; it’s an act of self-love.
Boe Jack Ryan Dominates the Kink Scene
By Shane Gallagher
Photos: Robert Sanchez
There were early signs that Boe Jack Ryan was destined for an adult career. “I’ve known I wanted to do porn since the fourth grade,” the Texas native admits. By his senior year of high school, he boldly stood up on the first day of class and declared his intention to become an adult film actor After graduation, he waited a few years before making the move to New York City to chase his dream. Thirteen years later, Boe Jack has become a highly sought-after star. When he’s not in front of the camera, he can be found in the gym or jetting off to his next go-go dancing gig. More recently, he’s expanded into the kink world, appearing in films such as his latest, opposite fellow rising talent Logan Aarons. We sat down with Boe Jack to learn more.
What drew you to work with KinkMen.com?
I’ve always loved the different explorations of sexuality on KinkMen.com. What drew me to film with them was being able to explore my own sexual desires in a safe and controlled environment.
Of the scenes you have shot with KinkMen. com, which have been your favorite?
I thoroughly enjoyed my first scene. Everybody on set made sure that I was comfortable and everything was done within my boundaries, as well as my scene partner’s boundaries. As far as shooting, it went very smoothly. I often look back at that first scene and smile because it was such a great experience.
How much of the on-screen leather identity that you portray on KinkMen.com mirrors your real-life relationship with kink?
I try not to do anything on camera that I don’t do in my personal life. Anything and everything you see me in is authentically me. I feel like it is kind of hard to fake some of the stuff that we get into once we cross the kink threshold. Authentic screams of joyous pain sound much different than when you’re putting on an act. It’s the same with what I wear. Anything I’ve worn on screen, leather-wise, I have also worn in my personal life.
What do you like about leather?
Leather, for me, triggers a different persona. It incites this bad ass inside of me. The feeling of leather across my skin builds me up to the point where I know I’m the baddest mother*cker in the room.
What do you think is the biggest misconception people have about leather culture and its role in porn?
I think many people believe that leather culture is something that only our dads and granddads took part in. Leather is for everyone! The first time you put on your full leather gear, stretch your stuff outside, feeling all sexy; at that moment, you will understand that leather is timeless.
Are you noticing leather as a growing trend in the gay community?
Yes, we’re seeing a lot more leather lately. Several clubs that I gogo dance at have started to have leather nights. More leather parties are popping up here and there, and there’s definitely a lot more leather being done in the amateur film scene. I feel like a new generation of younger people is getting into leather, which means there will soon be a big revival.
Looking ahead, how do you see the future of leather and kink in the adult industry, and where do you hope to take your career within that space?
I definitely see leather growing in the industry. I hope to see more conventions, meet-ups, and leather nights at local bars and clubs, all across the country.
Some say kink content is becoming too “mainstream”. Do you see that as a positive expansion of visibility or as a risk of losing authenticity?
I think it could be a positive thing. There’s nothing saying that you can’t keep your authenticity while still appealing to the masses. In my opinion, going mainstream just means that there’s more visibility and more people learning about the different kinks that they didn’t know they were into.
Atlanta’s LGBTQ+ Community Heroes
The People and Organizations Who Keep Our City Thriving
Edited by Mikkel Hyldebrandt
Atlanta’s queer community has long been defined by its resilience, creativity, and deep sense of care — qualities embodied by the leaders, advocates, and organizations who work tirelessly to make this city more inclusive for everyone. From those on the frontlines of healthcare and housing to artists, policymakers, and social connectors, these individuals and groups are the heartbeat of LGBTQ+ Atlanta. Whether fighting for visibility, offering lifesaving services, or simply creating spaces for joy and belonging, they remind us that community is our greatest strength.
Here are some of the people and organizations who keep Atlanta’s LGBTQ+ spirit alive and thriving.
Community Heroes: Individuals
Thomas Lázaro Executive Director,
PALS Atlanta
As the leader of Pets Are Loving Support (PALS), Thomas ensures that Atlantans living with HIV/AIDS, cancer, and other critical illnesses can keep their beloved pets by their side. Under his guidance, PALS continues to embody compassion in action — where care for people and animals go hand in hand.
that challenges Southern stereotypes and uplifts underrepresented creatives.
Dee Dee Chamblee Founder, LaGender, Inc.
Liliana Bakhtiari
Atlanta City Council, Post 5 At-Large
Taylor Alxndr
A proud queer, nonbinary Muslim elected official, Bakhtiari represents a new era of inclusive leadership in Atlanta politics. They are a tireless advocate for equity, youth engagement, and intersectional justice, proving that representation in local government truly matters.
Founder,
Southern Fried Queer Pride
As a performer, artist, and community organizer, Taylor has created a platform that centers Black and brown queer and trans voices through art and activism. Southern Fried Queer Pride is both a festival and a movement — one
A trailblazing Black trans woman and longtime HIV activist, Dee Dee founded LaGender, Inc. to advocate for the rights and safety of trans women — especially those navigating homelessness, incarceration, or sex work. Her decades of advocacy have made her one of Atlanta’s most respected community matriarchs.
Dewayne R. Queen Director, Division of LGBTQ Affairs, City of Atlanta
In his role at City Hall, Dewayne champions policies and programs that advance inclusion across city agencies. His leadership ensures that Atlanta remains one of the South’s most progressive and supportive cities for LGBTQ+ residents.
Thank you for all that you do!
Community Heroes: Organizations
Trans Housing Coalition (THC)
AID Atlanta
For more than four decades, AID Atlanta has been a cornerstone of HIV prevention, care, and advocacy in the Southeast. Its clinics, testing programs, and community outreach continue to save lives while destigmatizing HIV across generations.
Known for its legendary pool party and fundraising events, Joining Hearts raises hundreds of thousands of dollars annually for housing and HIV-related causes. Beyond the fun, the nonprofit builds hope and sustains critical local support networks.
For The Kid In All Of Us
Dedicated to brightening the lives of Georgia’s children, this organization provides toys, backpacks, and school supplies to families in need — and has become a beloved ally to Atlanta’s LGBTQ+ community, showing that compassion transcends identity.
Georgia Equality
Atlanta Socializers Club
A vibrant social and networking organization, the Atlanta Socialzers Club brings together queer Atlantans of all backgrounds for events that emphasize connection, joy, and inclusion. It’s community-building at its best — one happy hour, brunch, or charity mixer at a time.
Founded by and for trans people, especially Black and brown trans women, THC provides safe, affirming housing and support to those most marginalized. Their work tackles homelessness and systemic inequality with empathy and determination.
The state’s largest LGBTQ+ advocacy organization, Georgia Equality has fought for fairness and legal protections for decades. Whether lobbying for nondiscrimination laws or supporting queer youth programs, their impact is felt in every corner of the state.
More To Love
Celebrating inclusive nightlife and amplifying the community organizations of Atlanta, More To Love has created safe, affirming spaces for all queer people. Their parties, community events, and advocacy have helped lift up lesser known organizations and raise funds for critical programs across the spectrum of Atlanta nonprofits.
Together, these individuals and organizations embody the soul of Atlanta’s LGBTQ+ community: diverse, defiant, compassionate, and deeply proud. Their work reminds us that change is possible when we show up for one another — and that love, in all its forms, will always lead the way.
Thank you for all that you do!
BARS & CLUBS MIDTOWN
BLAKE’S ON THE PARK blakesontheparkatlanta.com 227 10th St NE
BULLDOGS 893 Peachtree St NE
FRIENDS NEIGHBORHOOD BAR friendsonponce-atl. com
736 Ponce De Leon Ave NE
MY SISTER’S ROOM mysistersroom.com 66 12th St NE
X MIDTOWN xmidtown.com 990 Piedmont Ave NE
THE T modeltatlanta.com 465 Boulevard SE
CHESHIRE
HERETIC hereticatlanta.com 2069 Cheshire Bridge Road
BJ ROOSTERS bjroosters.com 2043 Cheshire Bridge Road NE
WESTSIDE
MARQUETTE 868 Joseph E. Boone Blvd NW
840ATL 840 Ralph David Abernathy Blvd
ATLANTA EAGLE 1492 Piedmont Ave NE
FELIX’S 1510 Piedmont Ave NE
MIXX mixxatlanta.com 1492 Piedmont Ave NE
OSCAR’S oscarsatlanta.com 1510 Piedmont Ave NE
WOOFS woofsatlanta.com 494 Plasters Ave NE
TRIPPS fb: tripps-bar 1931 Piedmont Cir NE
EAST ATLANTA, GRANT PARK & EDGEWOOD
MARY’S marysatlanta.com 1287 Glenwood Ave SE
SISTER LOUISA’S CHURCH sisterlouisaschurch. com 466 Edgewood Ave SE LORE ATLANTA loreatl.com 466 Edgewood Ave loreatl.com
DINING
MIDTOWN
CASA ALMENARA 991 Piedmont Ave NE casa-almenara.com
OLIVE BISTRO olivebistro.com 1050 Juniper St NE #4
LA HACIENDA lahaciendamidtown. com
900 Monroe Dr NE
TUK TUK THAI FOOD LOFT TUKTUKATL.COM 1745 Peachtree Rd NW
DEKALB
LIPS ATLANTA atldragshow.com 3011 Buford Hwy NE
RETAIL MIDTOWN BOY NEXT DOOR MENSWEAR boynextdoormenswear.com 1000 Piedmont Ave NE, Ste A
ANSLEY
BARKING LEATHER AFTER DARK barkingleather.com 1510 Piedmont Ave NE
GCB & PLEASURES brushstrokesatlanta. com
URBAN BODY FITNESS
urbanbody tness. com
500 Amsterdam Ave N
CHESHIRE
GRAVITY FITNESS
gravity tnessatl.com 2201 Faulkner Rd NE
SPAS/BATHS ADULT
FLEX SPA exspas.com 76 4th St NW
SOUTHERN NIGHTS VIDEO 2205 Cheshire Bridge Rd NE
ANSLEY
1510-D Piedmont Ave. NE
We all have those moments of ‘wait, did they just say that?’ Lucky for you, we compile the best of the best right here on this page. Want to join in on the b*tch session? Submit your own nuggets to info@davidatlanta.com.
I am an acquired taste. Don’t like me? Acquire some taste.
The 8th wonder of the world? This bouncy booty.
Guess who got cheated on this weekend at a Halloween party? Not me, but y’all are messy.
If there was a line between right and wrong, I may have snorted it years ago.
Just remember, that somewhere out there, your name comes up when couples argue.
I feel like I’m an adult the same way a tomato is a fruit.
I promise to be by your side. Or under you. Or on top of you.
F*ck lemons. Right now, life is throwing watermelons at me!
