Life…
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Jocelyn,Bailey,Abby,Ava
TableofContents ALittleGreenVase…………………………………………………………………………………….….2 HomeisJustaFeeling 6 NewSchools………………………………………………………………………………………………8 ChangeisOkay…………………………………………………………………………………………...11 MovingOn 13 HomeisWheretheHeartis 19 TheHouseonGeorgeStreet……………………………………………………………………………...21 BeingKorean……………………………………………………………………………………………..24 2
ABBY
ALittleGreenVase(IllustratedbyAva)
July30th,2008.ThedayIcametolife.Onthatsameday,Ireceivedagreenvase.This isn'tsomeregular,ordinaryvase;thisisavasethatrepresentsmyculture.Passeddownfor decades,thisisavasethatIwillgivetomyfuturekids.Chinesesymbolsspreadacrosstheround bodycrossesatthebottom,paintedgreensomajesticasjade,andflowersrangingthroughout haveonlymademewonderwhatallofthismeans.WhoamI?FromthedayIwasborn,Ihave beensurroundedbymyfamily Theyaretheoneswhosawmetakemyfirststep,watchedme findmyfavoritefoods,supportedmethroughamilliondifferentsports,andmostimportantly, theyhaveshapedmyidentity.ThoughIamfarfromknowingeverythingaboutmyculture,this vaseisawindowintofindingoutwhoIam.Thisvaserepresentsluckandhappinesslikea ChineseRedEnvelope,beingpasseddownfromgenerationtogeneration.Thepreciousantique isnowmine.
Icomefromapowerfulfamilyonmydad'sside,asmyancestorswereChineseemperors. Mycousins,aunts,andunclesallknowhowtospeakChineseandtheimportanceofculture,the importanceofthisvase.Ihaveearnedtoseekmoreknowledge.EachtimeIgotovisitmyfamily inCalifornia,Iseeswordsandpaintings,worthmillions,andceramicpiecesthatwereso intricatelymade.Iamthentaughtthehistoryofeveryoneoftheartifacts.Anartifactthatmy entirefamilyhasincommonisavasethatwasgiventothemwhentheywereborn.Eachvase wasdelicatelymadeandpasseddownforovertwohundredyears.
Ittookmeawhiletorealizetheresponsibilitythatittakestobea“Yang”andthereisa lotofpressure.Youhavetohaveperfectgrades,beamazingatyoursport,havemanners,be
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happyallthetime,knowyourculture,thelistgoeson.AsIgrowup,Iwanttolearnmoreand moreaboutmycultureandwhereIdescendedfrom;thatisthemostimportanttome.Ihave alwaysfeltdistantbecauseIrarelyamwithfamily WhenIhearstoriesfrommy ninety-seven-year-oldGrammywhoescapedChinaintriguesme.Sheissuchajoy,hersmile makesmehappy,andhearingaboutherpastinspiresme.Itinspiresmetobethebestversionof myselfandtokeepgoingevenwhenthingsaren'tgoingmyway.Mygrammy,GerturdeYang,is myrolemodel.Ilookeduptoherbecauseshecoulddotoughthingsattheyoungageof15,right aroundmyagerightnow.SheescapedChinaforthebetterandwaslookingforthe“American dream”andnowhasstoriesthatwillbepasseddownforgenerations.Becominga“Yang”isno easytask.WhenandifIgetmarriedandhaveachild,thechildwillreceivemyvase.Butnot onlyisthechildreceiving“myvase”,buttheyarealsoreceivingmyGrammy’svase,mygreat Grammy'sVase,andsoon.Theywilllivealifeofluckandgoodfortune.
Whoknewthataceramicpiececouldbesovitallyimportantinone'slife?Ihopetobe abletolearnmoreaboutmycultureandconnectwithmyfamilymoreoften.Thisvasehastaught meunforgettablelifelessons,ithastaughtmetostayinspiredandkeepdoingmybest.AsIgrow up,Iwanttofollowinmyancestor'sfootstepsandcreatehistory Iwanttobesomeonewhowill betalkedaboutasIamtalkingaboutmyancestors.IwanttheYangfamily'slegacyandculture toliveonandowningthisvaseisastepinthatdirection.
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HomeisJustaFeeling(illustratedbyJocelyn)
MyfirstbreathwasinSeattle,myfirststepswereinIllinois,andthensomehowendedup inHawaii.Weirdisn'tit?Well,IhavelivedhereforovertenyearsnowandIwouldn'tcall anywhereelsehome.Thebeaches,thewarmth,thefood,thepeople,myfamilythisiswhereI belong.
InPortlock,thereisacoffee-coloredhouseattheendofaculdesac.Youwalkinsideto feelatease.Thereisabrightkitchenwheremanyfamilydinnerstookplace,ifyousitatthe breakfastbaryoucanlookoverontothelivingroomwherewehavehadmanyenjoyablemovie nights.Justtoyourleftisourlanaiwhichleadsoutontoourpool,wehavehadmanyfunparties! Thenontheside,thereareallthebedroomswhereIdomyhomeworkandwhereIfeelsafe. However,myhousedoesnotlookthesameasitdidtenyearsago.Forsevenyears,myhouse wasintheprocessofbeingcompletelyremodeled.Mytwoyoungerbrothers,mymom,mydad, andIwantedittofeellike“us”.Thehousefeltlostlikeamissingpuzzlepiece.Beforewetook sludgehammerstowalls,weallknewwewantedpeopletofeelwelcomedandcomfortable whentheyenteredwhatwecall“home”.Beforeitwasplainlikeawhitecanvas,andwepainted thecanvas.Everythingwasdullandwhite,therewasnocharacter Weaddednewlandscaping, openedupwalls,changedthecolorofthehouse,remodeledrooms,andmuchmore.Now,it feelslike“theYangfamily'shome”.
Lookingbackandreflecting,IthinkabouthowIamgoingtogoofftocollegeinless thanfouryears.Tome,thatiscrazy.IhavethoughtofcollegeeversinceIknewitexisted.I alreadyhavealistofallthecollegesIwanttoapplytoandagameplanonhowtogetintothem. OnceIgoofftocollege,mycoffee-coloredhousewhereIcreatedunforgettablememoriesforthe past10yearswillnotbethesame.Itwillstillbemyhouse,butIwillhavetomoveonintoa
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dormorsomethinglikethat.I'mnotexcitedbecausehomeiswheremyfamilyisandwhereI feelloved.It'snotaspecificplace,it'safeeling.IwillnothavemyfamilywhenIleavecollege, mybrotherswillbeSophomoresinthe“bigacademy”andmyparentswillbefocusedontaking careofthem.Iwillbegonetryingtogetajoborsavingtheworld,hopefullydoingsomething life-changing.Butintheend,Irealizehomeisafeeling,notaplace.Homeismyfamily.
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AVAGRACE
Newschools(IllustratedbyBailey)
It'sanewschoolyearandjustlikeseventhgradeyouonlyhadonefriendgoingtothis newschool.Youhavetorememberallthenewclasses,thenewcampusandeveryoneelse's names.Atleastthisyearseasierbecauseit'sinpersonwhereasseventhgradewasallonline.First dayofschoolyoumadeonefriendbutstilldecidedtobebyyourselfthemajorityofthetime. Yougetintothecomfortofyourownhomeafterbeinginanewenvironmentfor7longhours, likeaturtlegoingintoitsshell.Yourmomaskshowschoolwasandyoujustsayitwasgoodas anautomaticresponse.Thenshetellsyou“youhavetostopbeingsocomfortablebyyourself andyouneedtotalktopeople.”Thenit'syourseconddayandthenthethirdandit'sallthesame. Youthinkyou'redoinggoodinschoolthenyourparentstellyouthatyouneedtolearnhowto manageyourtimebetterandnotletalltheworkcatchuptoyouwhenyouprocrastinate.You stillgottafindthesilverliningandatleastnowyou'vemademorefriends.You'refocusingon schoolandyourfriendsstarttosay“you'reatthelibrarysomuchyoushouldjustdohomework later”buttheyonlysaythatbecausetheydon'thaveanysportsafterschoolsotheyhavelotsof time.Allyourfriendshavelotsoffreetimebutyoudon't.Thepressureofyourschoolwork, sports,andsociallifeispilingupandsuddenlyyoufeelliketheweightoftheworldisonyour shoulders.Thenyoustarttomakemorefriendswhotalktoyouwhileyouguysdohomeworkso youstarttohangoutwiththemalittlemore.Thenit'sthestartofsecondsemesterandyouhave
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waymorefriendsthanbeforeandyoukindofhavebettertimemanagement.Yougotthehangof thingsbutnowyouworryaboutclassestotakefortherestofhighschool.“I'mgladthatyou adjustedbutyouneedtostartfiguringoutwhatyouwannadointhefuture”iswhatyourparents tellyou.Youcouldfigureoutandgetusedtoeverythingnewgoingonbutwiththisyouarestill unsureandclueless.
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Changeisokay(illustratedbyAbby)
TimeistickingandIdon'thavemuchleft.Thisdecisioncouldchangemywholefuture andtherestofmylifedependsonit.DoIwanttogotoPunahouorMoanaluaHighSchool?
“Punahouisoneofthetopschoolsinthestateandyou'reluckyyougotaccepted,”issomethingI hearfromanyoneIinteractwith.ManypeoplewouldquestionwhyMoanaluaisevenanoption. Whowouldeverwanttopickapublicschooloverafancyprivateschool?Iwasoneofthose people.MoanaluawassomewhereimportanttomeandissomethingIwillalwaysremember.I couldn'tjustdecidetoleavemybestfriend,friendsfromelementaryschool,andpeoplewho makemefeellikeIbelongedafterknowingnobody.“ComeonAvayouhavetomakeadecision. Youhavethisgreatopportunityrightinfrontofyourfacebutit'slikeyou'reignoringand avoidingit,”iswhatmyparentssaytome.EverycarrideIgettalkedtoaboutpickingschools andI'msurroundedwiththisuncomfortabletensioneachtime.Itrytotalktomyfriendsand familyaboutwhichschooltopickbutit'slikeagameoftugofwarandI'mstuck.Myfriendsare ononesideoftheropewhilemyfamilyisontheotherandI'mthelittleflaginthemiddlegoing backandforthunabletopickaside. Moanalua or Punahou? Menehunes or Buff and Blue?
Timeisticking,daysaregoingbyinablurandIstillhaven'tmadeadecision.Ionlyhad onedayleft.Onedaytopickaschool.Onedaytomakeadecisionthatcouldchangemylife.I amstillgoingbackandforth.OnenightbeforeIgotobedIfindmyselfintears,stressedout whilewatchingthetvlightseepingunderneathmydoorchangecolors.“WhyamIsostressed aboutthis?Whycan'tImakethissimpledecision?”Iaskmyselfnotrealizingit'ssomething easiersaidthandone.
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It'sthefinaldaytomakemydecision.Iwakeuptolookatmyclockandseethatit’s6 o'clockinthemorning.Ihave12hourstomakemydecision.ThequestionsIgetinthecarride toschoolmakestheusuallyshort10minutesfeellikehours.Iamstilloverwhelmed,unableto pick.Idon'tlikechangeandIneverwill. Moanalua or Punahou? Menehunes or Buff and Blue? IsallIcanthinkabout.FinallythetimecomesandIhavetodecidemyfuture.Thoughtsrace throughmymindgoingbackandforth,likethelittleflag,choosingbetweenwantinganewstart orbeingcomfortablewithwhatIhave.ThenIrememberwhatmydadalwaystellsme,“Don't eversettle.Youcanstillhavewhatyouhavenowwhilegettingbetter.”Thisflipssomethingin mybrainandIknowthatIwanttogotoPunahou.Igotothedinnertableandtellthemmy decision,nervousaboutwhatmyparentswillthinkorsay
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BAILEY
MovingOn(illustratedbyJocelyn)
November6,2022
Ithadbeentheworstweekendofmylife.Iwasatcampwithmyswimteam,sittingina chair,crying.Thesmellofsaltwaterrushedthroughthewind.Damp,itchygrassswayedbymy feet.Thepastyearhasnotbeeneasy Ihadthebestfriends,thebestteam,thebestlife. Somehow,everythinghadchangedandIcouldn’ttakeitanymore.Thepersonwhousedtobe mybestfriendhadmanagedtoturneveryoneagainstmeandtriedherhardesttomakemylife miserablewheneverandwherevershecouldbecauseofherinsecurities.Tearsstreameddown myfacelikearushingwaterfall.
Beforethis,thedayhadbeengoinggreatbecauseshewasn’tthere.Igottoreconnect withmyotherfriendswithoutthestressofherbeingthere,takingthemfromme.Butwhenshe cameback,everyonewenttoher,andIwasaloneonceagain.Itwashardtodealwiththisforso long,butthiswasmynewnormal.Icriedatnight,notbecauseIwasthreatenedbyher,but becauseIknewhowtheteamusedtobe,howeveryoneusedtobe.Thethingthathurtmethe mostwasthatIthoughtshewasmybestfriend,butreally,shewaspureevil.Whenwewere friends,shewasthetypeofpersonwhowassosweetandkindtoeveryone.Turnsout, everythingshedidwasjustanact.Ontheinside,shewasanentirelydifferentperson.Somuch hadchanged,butinmyheart,Icouldn’tmakemyselfleave,nomatterhowmuchIwashurting. Ihatechangeandittookmeawhiletorealizethattherewasadifferencebetweengood
andbadchange.This,whathadhappenedintheclub,wasabadchange.Mostofthemwere
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goodpeoplewhohadbeenpulledawayfrommeandmanipulatedbyher.Butwhatwascoming wouldbeagoodchange.
MymomunderstoodhowsadIwassowepackedupandleftadayearly Thenextday,I wouldbetryingoutfortheJVswimteamatschool.Atthispoint,itwasjustsupposedtobea breakfromthetoxicityofmyswimclub.ButlittledidIknow,itwouldbeaneverlastingbreak.
November7,2022
Iwokeupthismorningandsomethingjustwasn’tright.Mythroatburned,itfeltlikemy headwasonfire,andtheroomwasspinning.Iwassickonthefirstdayoftryouts.Ihadtogo, nomatterwhatbecausethiswasmychancetoexperiencesomethingnew,toloveswimming again.Idecidedthenightbefore,whenIgothomefromcamp,thatnomatterwhat,Iwasmaking thisteam.Nothingwouldstopme.SoIdraggedmyachingbodyoutofbed,gotdressed,and stumbledintothecar.Ihauledmybodyfromclasstoclass,wonderingifIwasgoingtothrowup orpassoutwitheachstepItook.IhadtokeepfightingbecauseIwantedthismorethananything intheworld.Iwantedtolovemysportandtogotherefeelingwanted,feelingloved,feeling safe.Ifinallymadeitthroughthedayandnowitwastimetogiveitonelastpush.
IwenttotryoutsandforcedmybodythroughthewaterasfastasIcouldgo.Ididallthe sets,madeallthetimes,andprovedthatIshouldbethere.Tryoutswerethreemiserabledays. Butsomethingaboutitlitafireinsideme,afirethatburnedbrightenoughtoguidemethrough. ByWednesday,thelastdayoftryouts,IlearnedthatIhadmadeitontheteam.Iwouldnothave toseemyclubforthreemonths.Theemotionscrashedthroughmelikeatsunamiwave.Ihad
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notfeltthishappy,thismuchreliefinayear.Thiswasmychanceatanewbeginning,tomeet newfriends,goodfriends.
November11,2022
IhadbeenpracticingwiththeBlueTeamforafewdays.Ihadn’tfeltthismuch happinessinforever.SinceImadetheteam,IhavemadesomanynewfriendsandIenjoygoing topracticeeveryday.MyfriendsthinkI’mcrazyforlovingpractice,buttheydidn’tknowwhatI hadbeenthroughbeforethis.Thiswasthelightattheendofthetunnel.Imadeitoutofthe tunnel,andIwasstartingtodebateifIeverwantedtogobackin,backtomyclub.Onesideof mewastellingmetonevergoback,toswitchclubs,tofeelthishappinesseveryday Theother sideofmedidn’tlikechange,didn’tlikethefeelingofmovingon.Ihadbeenscaredofchange mywholelife,andthethoughtofleavingtheclubthatIhavebeeninsinceIwasnine,nomatter howmuchittoremeapart,wasstillterrifying.
Theunknownscaredmethemost.IhadbeensufferingforsolongthatIjustknewwhat toexpect.IknewIwouldgetleftout,IknewIwouldn’thaveanyfriends,andIknewIwould cryatnight.ButifIswitchedclubs,Iwouldn’tknowwhattoexpect.WouldIfinallyfitinagain? IhadtodecidewhetherIwasleavingtheclubbyNovember15th.Eachmonthonthe15th,you wouldhavetoconfirmwiththeclubthatyouwouldbecontinuingwiththem.The15thwasfour daysaway,andIhadnoideawhattodo.
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November14,2022
Ilovedtheteam.Ilovedmynewfriends.Ilovedtopractice.Ilovedswimming.Sowhy wastheresomuchhesitation?Whydidn’tIwanttoleave?Icouldn’tanswerthis.Ineededmore time,timethatIdidn’thave.IhadtotellthemtomorrowifIwasstayingorgoing.Continuingto suffer,ormovingforward.Ihadn’tbeenatclubpracticesinceIstartedhighschoolseasononthe BlueTeam.MyfriendswereaskingmeifIwouldevergoback.Myparentsneededtoknowmy decision.ButthebiggestpressureIfeltwasinternal.Ididn’tknowwhatwasrightforme.The decisionwaslikeadarkstormcloudovermyhead,followingmewhereverIwent.Tomorrow. Tomorrow.Tomorrow.Ihadtodecidebytomorrow.
IfIleftmyclubandjoinedPunahouAquatics,woulditbedifferent?WouldIhave friends?Friendsthatliftmeinsteadofweighingmedown?Mostofall,wasIwillingtotakea chance?Irememberedexitingthecar,withnoonetotalkto,noonetoputmybagnextto,and noonetosharealanewith.Irememberedcryingatnight,wonderingwhythiswashappeningto me,whyshehaddonethistome,andwhyIdidn’tjustquitswimmingaltogether.Then,I reflectedonthepastweek.Everyonewassoniceandwelcoming.Wewereallfriendsandnoone wasleftout.Wetookpicturestogetheratthemeets,sangsongstogetheronthebus,and encouragedeachotherwhenoneofuswasfeelingdown.Atthismoment,Iunderstoodthat sometimesyouneedtotakerisks.IneededtostepoutofmycomfortzonebecauseIwantedto experiencethegreenergrassontheothersideofthefence.Mylifehadbeenmiserableforso long,andafterallthis,IrealizedIwaswillingtodoanythingtobehappyandloveswimming again.Iwouldn’tlethermakemehatethesportIhavelovedforyears.IdecidedthatIwasnever goingback.
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May7,2023
IamnowinPAQ,andIhaveneverbeenhappier Ihavemadesomanynewfriendsand madesomanynewmemories.Everyday,Ilookforwardtogoingtopractice,eventhoughthe workoutsaresuperhard.Ilookforwardtogettingbetterandimprovingmyswimming.Idon’t needtofocusonwhoIwilltalkto,whoIwillputmybagnextto,orwhoIwillsharealanewith anymore.Icanjustfocusonbeinginthemoment,havingfunwithmyfriends,andgettingbetter atswimming.
Inlife,youmakesomanydifficultdecisionsandsometimes,youdon’tknowwhatyou shoulddo.Thereissomuchpressureyoufeelbutthemostimportantthingistopushthroughthe pressure,tofindthegoodinchangeandrisk.Thisdecisionwasamake-or-breakmomentinmy life,andthatscaredme.Ilearnedtoembracemyfearandtakethechanceanyways.Eventhough Iwashurtingforsolong,somuchgoodcameoutofthisexperience.IlearnedwhoIneverwant tobelike.Ilearnedhowlonelylifecanbewhensomeonetreatsyouthisway.Ilearnedhowto moveon.Thiswasthesunbreakingthroughthestorm.Thiswasmynewbeginning.
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HomeIsWheretheHeartIs(IllustratedbyAva)
IhavelivedinthesamehouseeversinceIwasborn.Weliveinmygrandpa’soldhouse,where mydadgrewup.ItisnotamodernmansionbutIloveit.Somethingabouttheolderfeeling makesitseemmorelikehome.ThesoundofthefloorscreakingwhenIstepintothehallway closetorthedoormakesasqueakysoundwhenit'sopenedorclosed.ThescentoftheAutumn HarvestcandlemymomlightsateverySundaydinnerwhenmygrandparentscomeover.The bittersweetsmellofcoffeebeingbrewedat6:00everymorning.Althoughnewandmodern housesarebeautiful,theydon’tfeelthesame.
MyhousecontainsallofthememoriesIhavemadethroughoutmylife.ThisiswhereItookmy firststepswhenIwasninemonthsold.ThisiswhereIfoundoutIwasgoingtoPunahouwhenI wasfiveyearsold.Itholdstheflowerwallstickersmymomhadputallovermybedroombefore Iwasborn.Ithasthetall,woodencabinetsmygrandpamadewithhisowntwohands.Ithas countertopsandakitchentablemadefromanoldbowlingalleylane.ItiswhereIplay
Tug-Of-Warwithmydogs,wrapChristmaspresentswithmymom,havesleepoverswithmy friends,bakecookiesforcamp,andhugmystuffedanimal,Ducky,whenIamfeelingdown.It holdsthehappiestmemoriesandthesaddestones.
Werecentlydidsomeremodelingonourhouse.Wepaintedthewallsalightgreycolorand boughtanewcouchandchairs,countertops,andremodeledthebathrooms.Remodelingand decoratingourhousewassomuchfun,butitwasalsoalotofchangeatthesametime.Although itmaynotseemlikeabigdeal,Imissthefeelingofourhouse,beforeitwasredone.Whenwe paintedandremodeledeverything,someofthatfeelingwassortoflost.Before,myhomefelt
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likeawarm,cozyblanketwrappedaroundmeonacold,winternight.Now,everythingwas different.Apartofmewasmissinganditwaslikesomeofthememorieshadbeensweptaway.I feltaswellofemotionslikeawavecrashingontheshore.Happy,sad,excited,andupset.Ittook awhileformetoseethebeautyinchange.Ilearnedthatitisimportanttorememberthatmy homewillalwaysbemyhome,nomatterwhatchangesoccur.Newmemories,experiences,and traditionswillbemade,buttheoldoneswillliveon.Here,whereIgrewup,whereIspenttime withmyfamily,friends,andpets,willalwaysbehome.
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Jocelyn
ThehouseonGeorgestreet(IllustratedbyBailey)
I’vealwayslivedonthesamestreetandinthesamehouseforaslongasIcanremember. AsmallyellowbananacoloredhouseonGeorgestreet.Whenthesunhitsit,itlightsupthe wholeneighborhood.That’showbrightmyhousewas.AsIwalkedintothehouse,Icouldsmell thedeliciousaromasfromthekitchenfrommymomscooking.Thehousehad1bathroomand2 bedrooms.Buttherewere4peoplelivinginthishouse,includingme.MysisterandIshareda bedroomandmywholefamilyallsharedthatonebathroomwithonesink,toilet,andshower
MysisterandIwouldalwaysfightoverouronebathroomandwhowoulduseitfirstorwho wouldshowerfirst.Gosh,itwaslikehyenasfightingoverapieceofmeat.Althoughourhouse wasprettysmallwehadalargebackyard.Inourbackyardsatamassivemangotreewithleaves thathadalltheshadesofgreen.Themangosthatwereproducedfromthetreewereabsolutely delicious.Itwaslikeabombofflavorexplodingintoyourmouth.Sweet,tanginess,and fruitinesswouldburstintoyourmouthasyoutookthefirstbite.Theywerethebesttasting mangoesever
WhenIwasin7thgradewefinallydecidedtodemolishourtinyyellowhouseonGeorge Streetandrebuildit.WemovedoutandintoanewhouseinSaintLouisonAlancasterstreet. Thishousewasnotmuchofanupgrade,infactitstillhadonly1bathroom.Butithad3
bedroomswhichmeantIfinallygotmyownbedroom.Theyardwasfilledwithlusciousgreen grassandbeautifulplumeriatreesthatwereyellowandpink.Thedrivewaywassosteepthat everytimeourcarwentupit,itsoundedlikeaneaglescreeching.
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MyhouseonGeorgeStreetwasfinallygettingdemolished.Istoodonthehardgray cementasaballthesizeofababyelephantwaswreckingmyhouse.Piecesandpiecesofwood felloffasthewreckingballhitmytinyyellowhouse.Thememoriesinthathousewashedaway likethesandontheshoreatthebeach.AsmuchasIwasdevastatedtoseemyhousegetting destroyed,Iknewthatthistransitionwouldunlockanewchapterinmylife.
3monthshavepassedandthehouseonGeorgestreetwascompletelygone;therewas onlycrackedcementanddirtleftontheproperty.Inordertocontinuebuildingthenewhousethe contractorstoldusthatweneededtocutdownthemangotree.Thatmangotreewasthehighlight ofourproperty.Italwaysproducedthebrightestyellow/orange,juicy,andplumpmangoes.We wereallhesitanttocutitdownbecauseofthegreatmemoriesitheld.Wewouldalwayspick mangoesasafamilyandeatthemtogetherormaketastydessertsoutofthem.Butthedecision wasmade.Wewerecuttingdownthetreeafterithadlivedfor30years.Theconstruction workerstookoutthebiggestsharpestbladeI’veseen,andstartedcuttingchunksofthemango treedown.Stickysapfelldownthetrunkasthetreewasdying.Thiswashardesttoletgoof becauseitwasthebestmangotreeever.
InOctober,after1year,ourhousewasfinallyfinished.Weshovedthecardboardboxes fullofbooks,clothes,pots,pans,andetc.Thenwefinallymovedout.WedrovedowntoGeorge Streetandunloadedallofourboxes.Irushedtothefrontdoor,andwentinside.Cleanwhite wallssurroundme,asthesmellofpaintrushesthroughmynose.Isprintupthestairsandseea whitemarblekitcheninthecornerofthelivingroom.Ifinallyhadmyownroom,andthistime withaminiwalkincloset.Inowonlyhadtoshareabathroomwithmysister,andtherewere2 sinkswhichmeantnomorefightingwitheachother.Beinginthishouseremindedmeofallthe greattimesthatIcherishedinmyoldyellowhouse.Imissedourbigbackyard,butwetradedit
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forabiggerhouse.Imissedthelizards,andgeckosthatwouldcrawlupthebananatrees.I missedthemangotree,mostofall.Butthiswasourbeautiful,newhouseonGeorgeStreet.
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BeingKorean (illustratedbyabby)
Haveyoueverfeltexcludedfromsomething?Likeyourfamilyleftyoutogotothe beach,oryourfriendsmadeplanswithoutyou?Ifeelexcludedfrommyculture.Iam100% Korean.ButIcannotspeak,readorwriteKorean.IwasbornandraisedonOahu,andInever spokeKoreangrowingup.InevergrewuparoundKoreanfriendsorhadthechancetolearn Korean,eventhoughmyparentsarebothfluentatit.Idon’tevenfeellikeI’m100%Korean, becauseIliveinHawai’i;asmallremoteislandinthepacificocean10hoursawayfromKorea.
MymomistheonlyoneinherfamilythatlivesintheUnitedStates;therestofher familystilllivesinKorea.MyfamilyandIvisitKoreaaboutonceayear,exceptduringthe pandemic.Mydad’sfamilylivesintheUnitedStatesinCalifornia.Butsomehowmymomand mydadbothendedupinHawaiiandhadmysisterandI.
EverytimeIvisitKorea,Ihavetroublecommunicatingwithmygrandparents.Ican understandsomecommandsbutIcannotreplyback.Iprettymuchknowhowtosayyes,no,and thankyou.Somyconversationswithmygrandparentsaresimpleandonesided.Icanseetheir disappointmentwhenIcannotrespondinKorean.Theireyeslooklikedarkmoons.Theyhave thatfamiliarscowlontheirfaces.
WheneverIseemyparents'Koreanfriends,Ijustpretendtounderstandthem.Ismile,do alittlehalfbow,andnod.Whentheystartaskingmequestionsmyparentshavetorespond.They doallthetalking.
IwishIcouldunderstandKorean.IwishIcouldspeakKorean.IwishIcould communicatewithmygrandparents.IwishIcouldshowofftomyparents'Koreanfriends. I wishIwasn’texcludedfrommyculture.
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WhenwritingmyvignetteIusedrhetoricalquestionstokeeptheaudienceengaged. WhenIwritearhetoricalquestionIwantittomakethereaderthinkdeeperaboutthemeaning behindit.Forexample,“Whoknewthataceramicpiececouldbesovitallyimportantinone's life?”(YANGALittleGreenVase).Inthisexample,Iwastalkingabouttheimportanceofthis vaseIownandhowIwanttofeelmoreconnectedwithmyculture.Thisquestionwaswrittento makethereaderthinkaboutwhatisimportantlikecultureandhowjustavasecanmeanso much.Additionally,Iusedsimiliestoprovidedeepermeaningandcontextinmywriting.The firstexampleis,“Thehousefeltlostlikeamissingpuzzlepiece”(YANGHomeisJusta Feeling).Iwrotethisbecauseitshowedhowourhousebeforeitwasremodeledwasaburden andwaswhatwasmissinginourlives.Thisgavedeepermeaningtomyvignette.Another exampleis,“ThisvaserepresentsluckandhappinesslikeaChineseRedEnvelope”(YANGA LittleGreenVase).Inthisvignette,Italkedabouthowthisvaserepresentsmycultureandluck. IrelatedittoaChineseRedEnvelopebecauseaRedEnveloperepresentsgoodwishesand fortune.ReceivingandgivingaRedEnvelopeisanotherChinesetraditioninmyfamily Allof theseexamplesenhancedmyvignetteandthereader'sunderstandingofitaswell.
Ava’svignettewasaboutchangingschoolsandthedecision-makingprocess.I brainstormedwithheronthebest,mostcreativeartIcouldcreate.Iendeduponasplitroadto PunahouandMoanaluaHighSchool.Thisshowedhowshehadtochooseone.Inhervignette, shetalkedabouthowitwaslikeatug-of-warwhenmakingthisdecision.Iincludedtug-o-warin mywatercolorpainting.IaddedthreepeopletothePunahoussideandtwopeopleto Moanaluas'ssidebecause,intheend,shechosetoattendPunahou.Then,Iaddedherprosand thefactsonbothsides.ShewouldgotoMoanaluabecauseshehadherbestfriendandshesaidit wasapublicschool.Ontheotherhand,shesaidthatPunahouhadnewopportunitiesandwasa privateschool.Imadetheroadblackandmysteriouslookingbecauseitwasscaryandabig decisionforAvatochooseaschool.Iwantedtostressthisfactinmyart.Ialsochosetodraw importantbuildingsatbothschools.ForPunahou,IpaintedBishop,andforMoanalua,Ipainted theirperformingartscenter.
Jocelyn’svignettewasaboutherstruggletoconnecttoherculture,Korean.Throughout hervignette,IfeltlikeIreallyunderstoodherstruggletoconnectwithherfamilyandculture.So Iwantedtoshowthatstruggleinmywatercolorart.IbrainstormedwithJocelyntocomeupwith themostcreativeandcaptivatingartpiece.WeendedupchoosingawalltoshowhowJocelyn wasseparatedfromherculture.IpaintedJocelynononesideofthewall,andeverythingshe mentionsaboutbeingseparatedfromhercultureandlanguageontheothersideofthewall.She talkedabouthowKoreanwaslikegolfandsoIdrewagolfball.Shementionedthingslike family,a“secretlanguage”,difficulties,struggles,andlanguagebarriers.Iputinanapple becauseshewroteastoryabouthowshehadalanguagebarrierinhervignette.Ipaintedabook becausesheearnstolearnaboutKoreancultureandthelanguage.
Author’sStatement:AbbyYang
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Author’sStatement:BaileyNakamura
Inmyvignettes,Iusedrepetition,imagery,andsimilestoconveymyemotions,illustrate scenes,andemphasizethemotifoflimitedtime.Inmyvignetteaboutchangingswimclubs,I explainedhow“Thedecisionwaslikeadarkstormcloudovermyhead,followingmewherever Iwent.Tomorrow.Tomorrow.Tomorrow”(Nakamura,MovingOn).Inmysecondvignette aboutmyhouse,Iusedimagerytohelpdemonstratetheolderfeelingofmyhome:“Thesound ofthefloorscreakingwhenIstepintothehallwayclosetorthedoormakesasqueakysound whenit'sopenedorclosed.ThescentoftheAutumnHarvestcandlemymomlightsatevery Sundaydinnerwhenmygrandparentscomeover.Thebittersweetsmellofcoffeebeingbrewed at6:00everymorning”(Nakamura,HomeIsWhereTheHeartIs).ThisshowshowIuseda similetoexplainhowmakingthedecisionwasverydifficultforme,astimewaslimited.This alsopresentsmyuseofrepetitiontohighlightthedeadlinetogivemyanswerifIwasswitching clubsornot.BothoftheseliterarydeviceshelptoaddadeepermeaningtothestressIwasgoing throughwhilehavingtomakethisdecision.Ialsousedimagerytoexplainhowmyhousehadan olderfeelingtoitandhowcertainaspectsofthesoundsorscentsmadeitfeelmorelikehome. Byusingimagery,Iwasabletoallowthereadertostepintomyshoesandviewmyhousefrom mypointofview.
MyfirstimagethatIcreatedwasforAva’svignette,“NewSchools''.Myinspirationfor myartwastoshowthestrugglesthatshefacedwhiletransitioningfromheroldschoolinto Punahou.Inhervignette,shementionedhowsports,academics,andfriendshipshadcreatedalot ofstressforher Itriendtoincludeeachofthoseaspectsinadrawingofasilhouetteofhertyring tobalanceeachthingontopofherusingwatercolormarkers.Inmyseconddrawing,createdfor Jocelyn’svignette,“TheHouseonGeorgeStreet'',myinspirationforthiswastheimageryfor eachofthehousesshehadlivedin.Afterreadinghervignette,Iunderstoodthateachhouseshe livedinwasabigpartofherlife.Iwantedtoshowhowatdifferenttimes,eachofthesehouses washerhome.Icreatedthreesectionsofthethreedifferenthousesusingpastels.Ithen connectedthemtogetherbygluingthemtoonebigpaper.
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Author’sStatement:AvaGraceButay
Inmyvignettes,toshowmyemotionsIusedsimiles,metaphors,repetition,analogies, andamotifofbeingunabletomakeadecision.InmyvignetteaboutgoingtoanewschoolI usedasimileandsaid,“Yougetintothecomfortofyourownhomeafterbeinginanew environmentfor7longhours,likeaturtlegoingintoitsshell,”(Butay,NewSchools)toshow thatbeinginanewschoolwasveryuncomfortableandIwasrelievedtobeinanenvironment thatIknewwell.InthesamevignetteIalsousedametaphortoshowthatthepressurewas overwhelmingandIcouldn'thandleitbysaying,“Thepressureofyourschoolwork,sports,and sociallifeispilingupandsuddenlyyoufeelliketheweightoftheworldisonyourshoulders,” (Butay,NewSchools).InmysecondvignetteIsaid,“Itrytotalktomyfriendsandfamilyabout whichschooltopickbutit'slikeagameoftugofwarandI'mstuck.Myfriendsareononeside oftheropewhilemyfamilyisontheotherandI'mthelittleflaginthemiddlegoingbackand forthunabletopickaside,”(Butay,ChangeisOkay)asananalogytoshowthatmemakinga decisionwaslikeagameoftug-of-wartohelpshowthatmakingadecisionwashard.Ialsoused repetitionwhensaying,“Moanalua or Punahou? Menehunes or Buff and Blue?”(Butay,Change isOkay)toshowthatIwasconsideringbothschoolsbutwasstillunabletodecide.
ForBailey’svignetteaboutherhomeIcreatedacollage.Shedescribedremodelingsomeofher houseasawavewashingawaymemoriessounderneaththewaveIputsomeofthememories shehadsuchasherfirststeps,andtraditionssheandherfamilyhave.AtthetopofthewaveI addedsomenewchangesshedidtoherhousesuchasnewfurniture.InsidethewaveIaddedthe emotionssheisfeeling.ForAbby’svignetteaboutagreenvaseshehas,Idrewthevase.Around thevaseatthetopIwroteAbby’sname,mamainchinese,andgrandmainchineseaswell.I wrotethistoshowthatitwaspasseddownformanygenerationsandisimportanttoherfamily.
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Author’sStatement:JocelynChoi
Inmyvignettes,Iusedsimiles,metaphors,imagery,andrepetition.Inmyvignetteabout myhouse,Isaid“Gosh,itwaslikehyenasfightingoverapieceofmeat”(Choi,Thehouseon GeorgeStreet).ThissimilewasdescribingmysisterandIfightingoverouronebathroominour oldhouse.Thissimilehelpsthereadersunderstandhowmuchofastruggleitwastoshare1 bathroomwithmywholefamily InmysecondvignetteaboutKoreanIusedrepetition.Inthe lastparagraphIrepeated“Iwish.”IreallywantedtolearntheKoreanlanguagetohelpme connectbetterwithmyculturesoIdidn’tfeelexcluded.
Abby’svignettewasaboutherhouse.Sheexplainedthatherhomeisherfamilyandit’s notaliteralplace.IdrewAbbyandinsideIdrewherheart.ThenIputapictureofherfamily insideofherheartwithahousearoundit.Thissignifiesthatherhomeisherfamilyandtheywill alwaysbewithher
Bailey’svignettewasabouthertransitiontoadifferentswimclubwhichwasPunahou. Shewasalsostrugglingwithfriendshipproblemsandthismadeherdepressedandnotlike swimming.ButaftershemovedtoPunahouswimclubshewasmuchhappier.InBailey's vignetteIdrewthesceneataswimmingpool.TheleftsideofthedrawingrepresentsBailey drowningundertheemotionalstressthatshewentthrough.Ialsodrewdarkstormcloudsasthe skybecauseshementionedthatitfeltlikeastormwasfollowingher.OntherightsideIdrew baileyswimminghappilyinthePunahouswimmingpool.Underthetent,iswhereallherfriends aresittingandtheyarewatchingherswim.
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