Growing Without Schooling 93

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Growing Without Schooling 93

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If getting along with people involves learning to see things from another's perspective, getting along with people of very different ages often pushes this skill to the limit. It's hard for an adult to understand why a small child screarns furiously when a new cup is substituted for his usual one, for example, and it's hard for a young child to understand why her parent calls the wonderful house she's made out of the cushions "that aw{ul mess." But of course adults and children persevere in their efforts to understand each other, since they do in fact get so much of value from being

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with each other.

Trevor Killory-Andersen is among those who write for this issue's Focus, "I'll Never Do ThotWhen I Grow Up," pages l9-2L

Inside this lssue: News & Reports p.2-4 Negotiating about Tests, Admission to Air Force Academy, Fublicizing Homeschooling

You Don't Have to Be Rich: Ideas for Homeschooling on a Low Income p. 5

The Journey from School to Homeschooling p. Challenges & Concerns p. 8-12 i

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6-7

Homeschoolers Getting Along, Teased by Friends, Choosing School, When Children Resist Teaching

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Watching Chlldren Learn p.

13-14

Museums Inspire Activities, Older Reader,

Nurturing the Wild

Book Reviews p. FOCUS:

I'll

15-18

Never Do That \[hen

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Grow Up p.

But What Do Homeschoolers Do? p.

19-21

22-24

lVhen Schedules and Appointments are Usefirl p.25-26

& Recommendations p. 27 Additions to Directory p. 28-29 Resources

Sometimes, though, it's hard for kids to explain themselves right at the time of the misunderstanding. They may not have the words, or the adult may not give them a chance, or they may be so cowed by the adult's size and power that they won't try. That's why it's important to make a special effort to ask kids how things look and feel to them. Many of us adults made vows as children never to do ttwt to kids when we grew up - whatever particular indignity or misunderstanding "thaf' represented at the time. But it's so easy to forget those vows as our perspective, unavoidably, becomes the adult's. For this issue we asked several kids to tell us about those vows they've made to themselves: "When I grow up, I'm going to treat kids like this..." or "I hope I never forget how kids feel when...". Because these writers are young (some of them are only 6), their vows and the feelings that engendered them are still fresh in their minds. It's good for those of us who are farther away from that time of life to be reminded of how things look and feel to children. And then what? What can we do after we are reminded of how kids would like to be treated? One thing that comes through in these letters is that kids are very forgiving if it seems as though the adult is willing to learn and to act more respectfully next time. Many GWS readers already do spend a lot of time thinking about how to treat children, though, and the problem may be that other people, outside the family, are not as thoughtful. What can we do about the fact that respectful treatment of children is not the norm in our

culture? Here John Holt offers some advice: "Paul Goodman, in his many talks with young people, used to say that one good way to work for a truly different and better world was to act in their daily lives, as far as they could, as if that world existed. What would you do, he would ask them, if the world had become more or less the kind of place you want it to be; how would you live, how would you treat other people? Live that way now, treat them that way now. If somettring prevents you, t4r to find a way to deal with that. We can begin to treat children, even the youngest and smallest, wherever we may find them, as we would want everyone to treat ttrem in the society we are trying to make." Susannah Sheffer

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