KiwiParent Issue #261 - August - September 2014

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RRP $5.00 (incl GST)

SUPPORTING PARENTS THROUGH THE EARLY YEARS

AUGUST 2014 – SEPTEMBER 2014

261

girls in gumboots, boys in tutus

– gender stereotyping

the

politicians speak – on policies that affect families

Father's

Day – on being fathered and being a father

tiny packages

of perfection – celebrating premature babies

killer driveways

over

$4,600

worth of prizes to be won

get your entries in to the 2014 Photo Competition

– prevent accidents in private driveways

ALSO INSIDE:

The magazine of Parents Centres New Zealand Inc

Parenting tips • Childbirth • Family finances • Breastfeeding • Lifestyle • Family health



ASG is helping New Zealand children become clever kids. For more than 20 years, ASG has helped New Zealand families offset the cost of education. Now, we’re also about collaborating with you for the entire education journey. That’s why we are creating an ever-expanding suite of online tools, resources and guides to help your child reach their full potential and live their dreams. So who is ASG? ASG Education Programs New Zealand is a member-driven, not-for-profit organisation and specialist education benefits provider that returns all profits to its members. To date more than 509,000 children in Australia and New Zealand have been supported to reach their full potential. Now it’s your child’s turn.

Exclusive offer for Kiwiparent readers You don’t just have a baby in the back seat or toddler in your car, you have a clever kid on board! Simply visit asg.co.nz/kiwi and select your preferred colour. Also, by submitting your details we can chat with you about how ASG can help your child reach their full potential.

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Special Features

Features

Girls in gumboots, boys in tutus

Letters to the Editor............................................................. 4–5­­

Kerstin Kramar............................................................................. 8–12

The politicians speak

Product page............................................................................ 6–7

General Election 2014................................................................ 16–19

Clean without drying

Better by the book

The second three months of pregnancy................... 24–25

Eleanor Cater................................................................................ 20–22

Finding the right fit Janine McKenzie-Minifie............................................................ 26–27

Johnsons’ Baby............................................................................ 14

My Foodbag.............................................................................. 28–29 Sustaining support Lisa Manning................................................................................ 30–31

It takes a Dad Brian Sorrell................................................................................... 32–33

Which is your favourite child?

Tiny packages of perfection

Buggy reviews.......................................................................... 36

Janelle Baine................................................................................. 46–48

2014 Kiwiparent Photo Competition........................ 50–53 Preparing for parenthood Sandra Scott.................................................................................. 54–55

Stephanie Matuku....................................................................... 34

Top tips for buying a buggy Melissa Zgomba.......................................................................... 38

Parents Centre Pages........................................................... 39–45 Homeopathy – how it works

Making pregnancy a little bit easier

Judy Coldicott................................................................................ 58–59

Pregnancy concierges................................................................ 56–57

Money habits set by age seven

Take some time, tears are OK

Kari Adams.................................................................................... 60–61

Sharalyn Haddleton.................................................................... 62–64

Bite me......................................................................................... 65

Striving for excellence

Winners from our last issue............................................ 73

ASG Teaching Awards................................................................ 66–67

Killer driveways Prevent driveway accidents at home................................... 68–69

Make a monkey out of me! Kelly Stone.................................................................................... 70–72

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kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

Find a Centre........................................................................... 74 Directory Page......................................................................... 75 Shopping cart........................................................................... 76–79 Giveaways.................................................................................. 80


SUPPORTING PARENTS THROUGH THE EARLY YEARS

AUGUST 2014 – SEPTEMBER 2014

Girls in gumboots, boys in tutus What stereotypes to we perpetuate to our children? It is not just the colour of the clothes, the imprints on the clothes, the colour of the toys, the muscly male superheroes who rescue helpless girls, or frilly princesses that wait all their lives to be married to their handsome prince that children see and hear that they then want to aspire to. Preschoolers pick up gender clues from older siblings, teachers, the media and us as parents.

Better by the book Read, it will shape your children’s world... reading shapes speech and language development. Reading together also increases our bond with our children and enables kids to escape into someone else’s life and see the world through their eyes. It teaches understanding and, most importantly, it teaches empathy. Discover ways to help your child become an extraordinary reader.

Tiny packages of perfection When someone you know suddenly has a premature baby, you may find yourself wondering how to react, especially if the baby is particularly early, small or unwell. But more importantly you may want to know how can you support them in this precious time. Read about some cherished babies born early and find some suggestions that will help you to make life easier for a family at a stressful time.

Kiwiparent – Since 1954 the magazine of Parents Centres New Zealand Inc Editor

Leigh Bredenkamp Ph (04) 472 1193 Fax (04) 938 6242 Mobile (0274) 572 821 leighb@e–borne.co.nz PO Box 28 115, Kelburn, 6150

Editorial Enquiries Ph (04) 233 2022 or (04) 472 1193 info@e–borne.co.nz

Advertising Sales

Taslim Parsons Ph (04) 233 2022 x8804 Mo 021 1860 323 t.parsons@parentscentre.org.nz

Design

Rainbow Creative

Printer

PMP (NZ) Limited

Publisher

Viv Gurrey, Chief Executive Officer, Parents Centres New Zealand Inc Phone (04) 233 2022 Opinions expressed in the magazine do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of the publisher. Advertising in this magazine does not imply endorsement by Parents Centres. Generally material in this publication may be reproduced provided it is used for non–commercial purposes and the source is acknowledged. However, written permission must be sought from the editor. Kiwiparent is proud to support the WHO/UNICEF International Code of Marketing of Breastmilk Substitutes adopted by the World Health Assembly in 1981.

ISSN 1173–7638 www.kiwiparent.co.nz

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It takes a book… Results from New Zealand's largest and most up-todate longitudinal study show toddlers are ethnically diverse, tech-savvy and that tantrums are still the norm for two-year-olds. No surprises so far. Based at Auckland University and funded by the government, Growing up in New Zealand looked at almost 7000 Kiwi families. The third report from the study entitled, ‘Now We Are Two: Describing our first 1000 days’, was released in June. Earlier reports described the children before they were born and in infancy. The study found preschoolers spend an average of 1.5 hours a day in front of a TV screen, and a whopping 80% of them watched TV or DVDs daily. Surprisingly, just 66% were read to every day. As a confirmed book addict, I find this alarming as reading to my children and grandchildren has been a cornerstone to parenting. Cuddling up together on the couch or in bed was, and is, precious time to read old favourites, discover new authors and explore challenging ideas. There have also been many occasions when the quiet time set aside for reading has also led to discussion and small confidences which we many not have had time to share if it were not for this quiet hiatus in a busy day. I have to admit that I have enjoyed watching the children grow and develop their own reading habits and tastes. It is so great when they introduce a new author they have discovered and start reading ahead when I am too slow to keep pace with an exciting chapter. As the children become more advanced and independent readers, there is all the fun of introducing them to the classics – like Lord of the Rings, Anne of Greengables, Swallows and Amazons and Little Women. Although the language can be challenging, the stories are captivating and extend their vocabulary and their horizons. Feedback from our facebook page shows there is still strong support for reading together. Emma Riley posted: “We read to miss 6m every night after her shower, before bed. At this stage of course she doesn't care about the books, but it's forming that routine, it's a special quiet time for us. And she gets so excited. I believe it helps with learning to talk as they get older too. I've got a MAMMOTH box of books that were mine as a child (some falling to bits because they've been read so much lol) and take great delight in reading her stories.” Chloé Payne agrees: “My Nanny’s girls all get read to before bed aged from 18 months – 8 years. Their parents have always done it as it's their special time before bed. I will be doing it with my children too.” The report showed more than 40% of children were able to understand more than one language, with the most common second language being te reo Maori. Great to know there are so many bilingual families out there! The study's director, Associate Professor Susan Morton, said the report helped build an understanding of what shaped children's development, and the support available to families.

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letters to the editor

Oops! On page 36 of the last issue the review for the Smart Lux was incorrectly labelled a Mountain Buggy product when it is actually made by phil&ted

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Top letter

How safe is homeopathy? I have been a member of Parents Centre since August 2013 when I joined the childbirth classes prior to the birth of my daughter. I remember my CBE discussing homeopathic remedies which I found difficult to understand. Firstly she was a trained nurse who I believe was and still is registered to work within New Zealand and would know that all practitioners work on 'evidence based practise', meaning all treatments must have been researched and have proven statistically significant results to be given to patients. Secondly, I understand that there are numerous 'treatments' available and used in our multicultural country and yet Parents Centre is advertising and therefore suggesting to new parents that homeopathy is a safe treatment. My main concern is that parents (including my own coffee group) are

getting advice about using homeopathic remedies which have no scientific backing and very little research. We are told our babies have weak immune systems when they are young yet there seems to be no limitations on the advice that is given about natural remedies, specifically homeopathy, so we don't know the harm this maybe causing our newborns. There is a lack of quality research on homeopathy published in reputable journals world wide. I feel it is not the ignorance of the medical community that limits the use of homeopathy but the lack of scientific evidence. I do not want to demean the profession but simply allow readers/parents to have all the facts in order for them to make more informed decisions for their children.

Josie Timmins, email

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In response‌ Homeopathy is individualised to the unique circumstances and characteristics of the person undergoing treatment. Therefore, the only valid research is the collection of cases, resulting from individual clinical treatments. Babies are usually responsive to the dilute remedies and using well prescribed remedies can give those parents a more natural option. We always recommend that you seek professional advice for chronic conditions or if you are unsure of what you are dealing with. Clinical trials are an ongoing aspect to homeopathic practice and professionalism. Homeopathy is one of the best researched forms of complementary and alternative medicine (CAM). A group commissioned by Prince Charles to examine CAM reviewed the research base of various fields of practice. They rated the

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evidence base for 13 different clinical conditions for each of the main fields, homeopathy obtained a total score of 38 which was second only to mind-body medicine and hypnotherapy (which totalled 40). The American medical journal, Pediatrics, published important research on the homeopathic treatment of acute diarrhoea in children. Conducted by physicians at the University of Washington and University of Guadalajara, the study included 81 children, ages six months to five years. Those children given an individually chosen homeopathic medicine recovered from the diarrhea approximately 20% faster than children given a placebo. (Jacobs, et al., 2000, Jacobs, et al., 2003). Researchers in India recently completed a pilot study comparing homeopathy to conventional therapy for children with acute ear infections. It found that homeopathy was an effective treatment – equal to conventional treatments. (Sinha, Siddiqui, et. al. Homeopathy. 2012. 101, 5–12). And in Italy, researchers studied the effect of homeopathic treatment on children with atopic diseases (asthma, allergic rhinitis, and eczema) over an eight-year period. The results were positive for homeopathy. (Rossi, Bartoli, et. al. Homeopathy. 2012. 101, 13-20).

Understanding enamel defects

Homeopathic intervention in pregnancy, birth and post-birth conditions has been of interest to practitioners and patients. In a paper published in the American Journal of Nurse-Midwifery, “Homeopathic Remedies in Prenatal Care,” specific recommendations for treatment of leg cramps and other pregnancy-induced discomforts (such as anaemia, herpes, nausea and hyperemesis, ptyalism, and pica) are discussed.

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It is important to remember that homeopathic remedies are substantially diluted and therefore safe for babies and children when used correctly. Unlike many other medicines which contain substantial amounts of matter, the homeopathic remedy has a way of prompting the body to heal itself without loading it up with toxic side effects. Homeopaths see this as one of the most gentle ways of supporting a child through their early years. We do not expect that every parent will be attracted to the concepts of homoeopathy and respect the choices that each individual has in electing to use or ignore the information we are sharing.

Judy Coldicott Senior Tutor – College of Natural Health and Homeopathy The latest issue of our newsletter On Tap contains an article on enamel defects including images that have been assessed against the commonly used measures for this condition.

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Image: Do and Spencer research in South Australia 2002-03

Mary Duignan, Torunn Borsting, Kathie McCarten, National Fluoridation Information Service,

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We do not believe that the image provided in the article was of the appearance of mild dental fluorosis. The image appeared to show demarcated enamel defects, and it is likely that these were unrelated to dental fluorosis which characteristically occurs as bilateral opaque white areas in the enamel that would be unlikely to have such a clearly defined border. There are many other causes for changes to the appearance of dental enamel including illnesses, dental caries and trauma to the teeth during tooth development.

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We are responding to an image that was printed with the ‘Fluoride – what’s all the fuss about’ article in your April-May 2014 issue. At the National Fluoridation Information Service, our role includes providing up to date, independent information and research on community water fluoridation relevant to New Zealand. This is primarily to assist District Health Boards and Councils to access scientific evidence to help with their decision making.

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Poppet Stars – music videos starring YOUR child! Poppet Stars is a unique and innovative animated series of educational songs that engage New Zealand pre-schoolers in a way never done before on television. Not only can you watch Poppet Stars on TV2, you can also become the star of the show! Just go to the Poppet Stars website and follow the simple instructions to upload a photo of your child’s face. In seconds YOUR child will be inserted as the star and can enjoy watching themselves online over and over again.

Poppet Stars is lucky enough to have collaborated with some great Kiwi composers and singers to bring you a fantastic soundtrack of well known and - ori. original songs in English and Ma Not only is Poppet Stars an entertaining leap forward in pre-school viewing, it’s a credible learning tool for New Zealand pre-schoolers. So what are you waiting for? Become a Poppet Star! Oh and remember to look for a little tomato sauce bottle hiding in each episode. Can you find it? On TV2 6:05am Saturdays. Online starring YOU anytime! www.poppetstars.co.nz

All 25 episodes of Poppet Stars align with Te Whariki – The Ministry of Education’s Early Childhood Curriculum. Each episode either introduces or consolidates subject matter already taught in Early Child Education institutions.

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kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

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Nurturing your journey with style – EGG Maternity Concierge EGG has created a new style of service using the concierge concept to showcase EGG services. This means that a customer’s individual needs are catered for whether it be showing them stylish maternity clothes or putting her in touch with the local Doula. The concierge is versatile in sharing information and creating a beautiful experience for the motherto-be depending on what her needs are. This means that the service is individual and unique. EGG have some vacancies throughout New Zealand for potential Concierges. A maternity concierge is a like a one-stop shop for pregnant women who wish to have a personal shopping interaction with friends, family and colleagues. The concierge will be given styling tips and pregnancy exercises compiled by experts in their field. They need to be knowledgeable about all aspects of pregnancy and support in their local community and have a passion for fashion and babies! www.eggmaternity.com

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in girls gumboots, boys in tutus Maybe girls should wear blue shirts with trucks on them and boys should play with dolls? When my son was growing up, having studied psychology, I wanted to get many things extra right. I knew about the importance of offering him a range of toys and dress ups, yes including dolls and pink dresses. We wanted him to be strong and gentle, assertive and kind, cute and smart, and most of all peaceful and open-minded. Really we wanted him to be anything he could be and that he would choose to be. What prevailed was somewhat surprising for us: He did not pay attention to the doll, did not touch the glittery pens or dress ups, not even the fireman one BUT phew … at least he did like books of all sorts. All he was really interested in was playing with cars and trucks in the sandpit, building with lego, and oh noooo – shooting

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kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

people with guns. I did wonder: Maybe we shouldn’t have bothered from the start? I am not sure how much society, the media, other children or adults influenced his choices. However, hardly anyone can deny that there are strong views out there what makes a boy and girl, what they play with, how they dress, what favourable characteristics they ought to display. Studies have repeatedly shown that the three words we use to describe a baby in a pink onesie are “cute, beautiful, and pretty” while the same baby in a blue onesie we describe as “strong, brave, and handsome”. We also hold the pink baby up to our shoulder while we support their back; and the same but blue baby we tend to bounce on our knee or throw them up in the air. However, even if we try to go against this trend, it is really not that easy at times.


“Children must be taught how to think, not what to think.” Margaret Mead

Have you ever tried to find something in the boys’ clothing section with flowers or love hearts on it or in the girls’ section with trucks, cars, and motorbikes for that matter? From history we know that it has not always been like this. I remember seeing my father in his first baby photo as a toddler wearing a frock although he was the first born, so did not inherit his sister’ clothes; and grandma told me that baby blue was known as a colour to represent gentle and humble. These days, it is not just the colour of the clothes, the imprints on the clothes, the colour of the toys, the muscly male superheroes who rescue the helpless girls, or the frilly princesses that wait all their lives to be married by their handsome prince that children see and hear about around them and that they then want to aspire to. Preschoolers pick

up gender clues from older siblings, teachers, the media, and us as parents. Although many progressive parents, like me, may be shocked to see their children conforming to such narrowly defined gender play roles, we may inadvertently perpetuate those stereotypes. Even the most enlightened father can become uncomfortable when they see their son playing with dolls or putting on a pink tutu around their hips; or the best meaning mother can be unsure how to comment on their daughter dressing up as an army officer or a truck driver. So when do our children start being influenced but such gender stereotypes?

Continued overleaf...

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What does the research say? Research shows that infants can tell the difference between males and females as early as their first year – so before they even talk or comprehend a lot of language. Researchers studied 10-month-olds to see if they could comprehend gender-related information. They did this by pairing male and female faces with certain objects that were typical or atypical for the particular gender. What they found was that the children became accustomed to seeing certain objects with a man's face and others with a woman's face, and they recognised when the patterns did not match. Studies further suggest that, at 18 months, before they even have the ability to understand their own gender identity, toddlers will focus longer on images that challenge typical roles, for example a man putting on lipstick. And by age two, they can locate themselves in the gender system and identify pictures of males and females based on external characteristics like hair length and clothing. But, interestingly, they cannot discern a naked person's sex. It is not until children are three or four years of age, however, that they really begin to work out for themselves what it means to be a boy or a girl although they are still very much influenced by overt characteristics well into primary school years. Last year, my 12-year-old son’s teacher invited us with my threemonth old daughter to visit a Year 3 class who were learning about identity. Coincidently, I had dressed her in green and red. To the question “do you think the baby is a boy or a girl?”, the 23 seven-year olds responded with what seemed a very unusually long period of silence relative to their age. Then a little boy put up his hand and said “I think, he’s a girl cause she’s got a lot of hair”.

As children gradually test their identity theories through observation and imitation, many preschoolers begin adopting stereotypical behaviours. Girls, for example, may spend most of their time in the dress-up or kitchen corner of their preschool classroom. Little boys may engage in activities that make them feel powerful, such as constructing block towers and then knocking them down with a toy truck. At the same time, it is not unusual for children to choose differently. However, from early on they may start feeling uncomfortable if they know that this choice is not congruent with what is typically expected for their gender. When my son was a new entrant he asked me what my favourite colour was to which I responded “at the moment it is green and I do not like pink but I used to really like blue but not green; I am not sure what it will be next week”. When I directed the same question to him he came close whispering in my ear “well Mami, I actually do like pink BUT don’t tell anyone”. It turned out that he thought if other children knew he liked pink then they would think he was a girl and he really wanted to be a boy. We have had many discussions about this over the years. It is not unusual for preschool girls to go through a pink and frilly phase and for preschool boys to spend their days imitating superheroes. In this culture, these phases pass. Nevertheless, it's important for parents to guide their preschoolers' thinking to make sure that they do not end up with lasting gender ideas based on stereotypes. I think we need to worry most about those boys who feel uncomfortable saying they like pink, dolls, dresses, or who want to be a vet or a nurse or even a mum; or the girls who only want to wear trousers, the Spiderman costume, climb trees, and want to have short hair but they feel too shy to say that.


BRIGHT COLOURS Understanding our values If we want to get this right we need to think about what we want to foster in our children. What characteristics do we want them to have? What values do we want them to internalise? How do we want them to see themselves and others depending on their gender, ethnicity, skin colour, body shape, age, and abilities? We are usually clear in our answers to these questions. We want them to be kind and strong, independent and caring, happy and determined, respectful and to follow their dreams and be whatever they like to be. However, if we take a moment to reflect on the comments we have made during the day to our children and other children, to what we see in the media, or the toys we have lying around, it can be mind-blowing how different that is to what we think we are clear about – from those comments our children understand what we value. And they will try to aspire to that, however, what if they feel differently to what they think we value? The result can be the opposites to all those positive answers mentioned above. If we want our daughters, to have action and adventure, play team sports, grow up to be a Formula One driver, if that’s what she wants to do; or if we want our sons to appreciate love, and flowers, and everything else nature has to offer, or to grow up to be a florist, if that’s what he wants to do, then we as parents – and as a society for that matter – better provide our children a platter of possibilities to practice being all those different things. As a society we can really benefit from our children growing up being happy and content with themselves in who they are and being respectful of others in who they are. We sometimes have little influence on the media or what others say but especially when our children are very young we have much influence on shaping that platter or possibilities. It clearly starts before they verbally express or even comprehend.

Continued overleaf...

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some tips for breaking stereotypes

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Encourage mixed-gender playdates, and expand the range of activities for each gender. Boys and girls who play together tend to engage in more varied activities. When they are playing with children of the opposite sex, boys may be more likely to participate in creative make-believe games or to practice their fine motor skills with art projects. Girls who regularly play with boys may spend more time outdoors, building their bodies through vigorous exercise. Reinforce behaviours that go against stereotypes. Rather than rule out certain stereotypical behaviours, make a point of reinforcing those that challenge the stereotype. For example, you might tell your daughter, "I love to see you in the sandbox" or "Wearing pants today was a good idea – it'll be so much easier to climb the monkey bars." A father may tell his son in tears, "Sometimes I feel like crying too." Question generalisations. Encourage your child to deal with other kids as individuals in specific situations rather than as representatives of their gender. If your son comments “girls are disgusting because they have girl germs” you might want to start talking about boy germs! Or you might want to respond about daddy’s gender atypical interests when your daughter says “all boys like mud or gross creepy crawlies”. Tune in to your own biases. Mums and dads themselves, of course, may be clinging to outmoded stereotypes, in both their thinking and their actions. The general rule is: Your children do as you do, they say as you say; they do not do as you say! So don’t be shy to comment on how brave, strong, curious, and independent your daughter is and how gentle, humble, patient, and neat your son is.

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Offer a platter of materials for role and identity exploration. Think about the range of toys you have in your home and strive towards as much variety as possible – but be prepared that your child may remain with a narrow interest. Think about dolls and figurines of different shapes, skin colours, ethnicities, genders and mix their clothes. Extend play materials to include a range of crafts including stickers, playdough, natural materials such as leaves, stones, sand. Provide a range of dress ups some of which are less gender bound such as animal dress ups. Most of all: Positively encourage your children to explore! Be respectful of the choices they make regardless of where their choice falls on the stereotypical scale. If children feel free and positive to explore, they tend to go through phases and through this practice and trying out they build an identity that they feel most content and happy with.

Kerstin Kramar Kerstin is the clinical director and consulting Psychologist at Mind & Heart Psychology. She has a particular interest in working with families and children who experience anxiety. She has been supporting families to become more resilient from such experiences and parents to raise their children to become confident, responsible and caring young people. Kerstin has worked as a psychologist overseas before moving to New Zealand with her young family. She currently works as a clinical psychologist with children and families in private practice in the Wellington region.


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Safe sleeping Around 60 babies die each year from SUDI (Sudden Unexplained Death of an Infant), and most are preventable. All babies need their parents’ help to ensure they are slept comfortably and safely as they cannot do this for themselves. They have huge physical differences from adults’ making them vulnerable to incorrect sleep positions – largely proportioned heads, limited neck strength, nose-only breathers, larger tongues, smaller faces and loose jaw joints.

six principles for Protecting a baby’s Life Face up: For all sleeps baby must be slept on its back. Their wake-up reflex is strongest in this position. Since babies have been slept on their back the rates of SUDI has dropped dramatically. Face clear: Baby must be free of all loose coverings, including bibs, pillows, loose swaddling, loose sheets, bumpers, soft surfaces, teddies and toys. Smokefree: Smoking in pregnancy reduces oxygen to the baby impacting on its development in many areas. The baby becomes used to low oxygen and once born is less likely to trigger its wake reflex in low oxygen, alarm situations.

14 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

Breastfed: A breastfed baby has a stronger immune system, gets sick less often, and has strengthened vital systems. Close by with own space: Sleeping baby close by and in their own space protects babies from SUDI. It allows baby to be close enough to alert you of their need and for you to respond. It also ensures they have their own safe space specific to their needs as a baby. Handled gently: Gentle handling protects babies from brain damage at a critical stage. Never shake a baby. Even a single shake can cause bleeding in and around the brain. Babies who are most vulnerable to SUDI are those where the six principles above have not been followed, aged under 12 months, born before 36 weeks, with a birth weight less than 2,500grams, and parental use of drink/drugs. Remember most SUDI is preventable.

For further reading � www.changeforourchildren.co.nz � www.isisonline.org.nz


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the politicians

speak

On 20 September, Kiwis will head to the polls to vote in the general election. We know families constantly have to make decisions for the future and believe our politicians must create a supportive environment where parenting is valued and families are supported – so this is our chance to be heard. To learn more about the promises and policies, we asked readers to submit questions for the political leaders of all our major parties – National, Labour, Green, Maori, United Future, New Zealand First, Act, Mana and Conservative. In April we sent the list of questions compiled by readers to each party leader and invited them to respond. Six of the parties took up the offer to talk to parents about their policies and here is a sample of their responses – in alphabetical order. Because of space limitations, we are not able to include all the questions and replies, but the full texts of the party leaders answers can be found on our website. They make interesting reading.


Some of the questions we put to party leaders were:

Parenting environment Taking into account housing affordability, the rising cost of food and power and high rates of inflation, what is your party’s view on creating the right environment where mothers and fathers can parent effectively?

The Green Party recognises that parents work hard to create the best start in life for their children, but this can be challenging as the cost of living rises. We would introduce a living wage, universal child payment, create an affordable pathway into home ownership for families with children, and bring down the cost of power, and extend free access to medical care for children to help families with their weekly expenses. We would also review family assistance to ensure every child has the chance to enjoy a good life and a fair future.

These are tough times for New Zealand families. Labour has a number of innovative ideas to reduce some of those pressures. Our Best Start package – part of our broader plan to ensure the best for all Kiwi children – will help ease pressure on working and middle income New Zealand families by investing in the crucial, early years of a child’s life. This will provide extra support for the 60 per cent of families who don't receive paid parental leave. Best Start will also see around 26,000 families each year benefit from a plan to extend paid parental leave to six months. Labour will also boost the number of hours of free early childhood education for three to five-year-olds and establish more ECE centres in high need areas to ensure there are enough places for kids who need

them. Power prices under a Labour government will reduce by hundreds of dollars a year under our NZ Power policy. By establishing this single state-owned electricity purchaser, we will also put a lid on future power price increases. Our monetary policy will lead to lower interest rates, a more competitive dollar and better jobs with higher wages. This means money Kiwis would have lost to banks and financial intuitions in the form of higher interest rates will instead be kept by them as increased savings. This policy will also help lower housing costs by making mortgages and rents cheaper.

Whanau Ora is about building and maintaining the capability of whanau to be self-managing; living healthy lifestyles; participating fully in society; confidently participating in te ao Ma- ori (the Ma- ori world); economically secure and successfully involved in wealth creation; and cohesive, resilient and nurturing. whanau Ora ensures that all families and whanau can be supported to be the best that they can be; to be selfmanaging and to take responsibility for their own economic, social and cultural development. We must restore time-honoured practices our wha- nau have followed, as hunters, growers and gatherers – to be selfdetermining and care for our own. We support the concept of the reduction of taxation if the family income is under the poverty line. Currently, 1.9 million taxpayers are on an income of $25,000 or less. Those people are paying $3.5 billion in tax, while the Government is accumulating surpluses of between $4 billion and $7 billion each year. If we could use $1.75 billion of the $3.5 billion on those 1.9 million taxpayers, to give a tax discount of 50% to our low-income people, we could achieve significant changes in the welfare and well-being of these people – and they could achieve choice. Wha- nau has always been at the centre of everything the Ma- ori Party do. And we believe that we need to strengthen wha- nau capacity to identify better and more affordable housing solutions and further address overcrowding and substandard housing. We will introduce

assessments for housing need of rentals undertaken by Housing New Zealand with an inclusive approach, accounting for health, cultural, social and economic well-being.

National’s sixth Budget shows New Zealand is heading in the right direction. We’re also putting the wellbeing of young families and children at the heart of our new spending with a comprehensive $500 million package to help families. We’re making GP visits free for under13-year olds, we’re extending paid parental leave and the parental tax credit, and we’re investing more in vulnerable children and early childhood education. On top of those, for the first time spending on health tops $15 billion a year. And spending on early childhood, primary, and secondary education will reach $10 billion with an additional $3 billion on tertiary education. Each of these commitments will help New Zealanders in practical ways at times of need and support a growing economy. Our growing economy is creating more jobs, and is seeing average wages rise faster than inflation. That’s happening now and Budget forecasts show it continuing with economic growth of 4 per cent next year, and around 170,000 new jobs and a $7600 increase in the average wage over the next four years. We’re in an enviable position compared with many other countries.

. New Zealand First has a comprehensive set of policies covering the economy, health housing etc, all of which are ultimately designed to make life more affordable and less stressful for ordinary Kiwi families.

It is United Future policy to focus on increasing affordable housing for families with children. We encourage home ownership by allowing

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working families to capitalise their Working-For-Families entitlements to help purchase or build a home, extend existing homes, or increase equity in a home. Those who choose to receive their payments in this way as a lump sum will be entitled to a small additional incentive to acknowledge the savings in administrative costs for the government.

cannot do this. We need to break the cycle of violence that occurs amongst families and against older people by making it easier for victims to free themselves from violence, investing in prevention programmes, providing support for people convicted of violence to change their behaviour.

We will investigate alternative local body funding arrangements with the aim of abolishing rates on domestic properties. We will continue to sell state houses with very high valuations (some are over $1million) to purchase two, three or four other properties to be used as state houses and extend the provision of community housing. Review Housing NZ tenancies on an annual basis to ensure that the occupants still meet the criteria and to ensure that housing stock is fairly allocated, and encourage long-term tenants into home ownership.

A comprehensive approach is required to deal with the consequences of violence against women and children, and to change the culture that leads to such violence. Labour believes this will require a long-term unified commitment by politicians, women’s and community organisations, government agencies and New Zealanders.

We would require all dwellings sold to be assessed for energy efficiency (e.g. insulation, double glazing, heating methods, use of solar energy) and given a standardised energy efficiency rating. We will also investigate the viability of options like rent-to-buy and shared equity mechanisms and the use of State Housing stock for this purpose.

Family violence What will your party do to ensure facilities and resources are available for families to help those at risk free themselves from violence?

Green MP Jan Logie has just launched a Member’s Bill that would give victims of domestic violence protection at their workplaces, protect them from discrimination, and reduce the harm experienced by victims through positive workplace attitudes and flexible policies. In addition to this initiative, we also have extensive policy on how to address family violence. The Green Party is committed to reducing family violence. The legal system alone

Labour is working on a comprehensive and long-term package aimed at making New Zealand a world leader in seeking to eliminate violence against women and children. There are however changes that can, and should, be made immediately. These measures are backed by hard evidence and are well overdue. They include changes to policing, the operation of the justice system and focussing on preventing sexual violence. The inquiry being undertaken by the Social Services Select Committee needs to be prioritised to deliver adequate and sustainable funding for sexual violence support services.

The Ma- ori Party believe that we must further invest in programmes that ensure the safety of wha- nau, mentally, physically and emotionally. We want to be able to invest in a healthy future, with children brought up in alcohol-and drug-free homes. We will also advocate for sustained investment in the approaches that work, including the Pacific Conceptual Framework for Family Violence, Nga - Wha - nau Vaka o Kaiga Tapu; E Te developed by the Maori Reference Group; and the ‘It’s not ok’ campaign. We will encourage wha- nau to establish goals making their homes

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safer for children, providing support to each other, providing support to connect to their whakapapa and addressing the violence that had affected them in the past. We do, however, believe that we as wha- nau need to remember our role as primary guardians of our children. The last thing our wha- nau want is for the state to intervene and to take actions which can ultimately destroy the nature of wha- nau relationships. We must take a wha- nau inclusive approach to find ways to move forward together. We believe that culture counts; and that the most meaningful solutions are ones which are relevant to the local need.

Much family violence is the result of alcohol and substance abuse and poverty. New Zealand First supports measures aimed at reducing these influences on family life.

United Future recognises that men and women are both perpetrators and victims and target family violence policy accordingly. We will ensure that police co-ordinate closely with social service and child protection agencies in each community, including automatic referral of any criminal activity that involves children, to improve responses to domestic violence and child abuse. We will ensure that Courts make the welfare and safety of victims, their families and the public paramount when considering bail applications. We will also foster co-operation and information sharing between police, courts, schools, community groups and social services when dealing with at-risk families and youth. We support increasing funding for adult literacy programmes, and will expand successful early intervention programmes and will ensure that prison inmates are provided with co-ordinated re-integration services upon release.


Childbirth education classes Parents Centres believes that all parents should have access to childbirth education. What will your party do to ensure childbirth education classes can be universally delivered throughout New Zealand by qualified childbirth educators?

The Green Party agrees that access to information and support about pregnancy, childbirth and parenting is an important part of making sure that every kid in New Zealand gets the chance for a good life. We would ensure adequate funding to make sure that every new parent gets this support.

Labour’s Best Start policy also covers this. We will ensure all women will have access to free antenatal classes, with a focus on first time mums and those who would benefit from them the most. There is good evidence showing that women who attend antenatal classes have better birth experiences and long-term outcomes. Antenatal education can also improve bonding or attachment, breastfeeding rates, parenting selfefficacy and parenting knowledge.

For the Ma- ori Party, we must ensure that wha- nau centred education initiatives are in place to support young parents. We believe that child birthing programmes should be readily affordable and accessible to all parents and delivered in a cultural context.

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Find out more ďż˝ Find more questions and the full responses from party leaders at www.kiwiparent.co.nz


better by the

book I chat to all the tweens I know for their latest recommendations. I scour the shelves at our local library. I raid my children’s bedrooms. Sometimes I hide away to do it, it’s my guilty little secret. It’s one of my all-time favourite pastimes; reading books which have been written for children. I know, I should have grown up by now. But over the past decade, through my kids, I’ve rediscovered some delightful reading pleasures from my past. Who couldn’t enjoy Dr Seuss’s Sneetches, poking fun at a class society, or Roald Dahl’s colossal characters, including the vile brats Augustus Gloop and Veruca Salt in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? I’ve enjoyed watching my kids, each at age six or thereabouts, marvel at the lands at the top of the Faraway Tree (it reminds me how much I marvelled too at their age). I’ve been deliciously enveloped in the lovable friendships that waft off the pages in Winnie The Pooh and I admit that I’ve enjoyed, possibly more than my little ones, the rhyming delights of Hairy Maclary, The Wonky Donkey and the tale of the sharp little mouse in The Gruffalo. I’ve discovered new horizons, such as the author Lemony Snicket (whose pen name is a delight in itself.) His Series of Unfortunate Events is a brilliantly crafted series of 13 books

which promise a woeful destiny to anyone unfortunate enough to pick them up. It delivers what I can only describe as delightful dark comedy at its best, in terms that kids (aged around 8, and obviously up to ages 40+) relate to. Like Lemony Snicket I’ve discovered many authors made big since my childhood, such as Michael Morpurgo, Louis Sachar, Sharon Creech, Ursula Dubosarsky, Neil Gaiman and New Zealand authors Kate de Goldi, Fleur Beale, Barbara Else, V M Jones and Bernard Beckett. Yes, there are big, wide worlds beyond our childhood reading of Beatrix Potter, Enid Blyton and J R R Tolkein. It’s exciting stuff. While I think reading is a thoroughly enjoyable pastime, it’s also so much more than that. David Hill, the 2013 winner of the NZ Post Junior Fiction Award, said this: “Kids who read stay out of jail. Reading gives them words. Words give them the ability to express and clarify themselves to others. How many young guys end up in strife because they don't have the vocab to explain what they're doing, and so they move from incoherence to frustration to violence?” It’s a thought-provoking point, and well made. But I think reading goes further than giving us words and the ability to articulate a point of view. Yes, it shapes speech and language development, but reading together also increases our bond with our children – it’s a great excuse for closeness! – and it enables kids to

20 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

escape into someone else’s life and see the world through their eyes. It teaches understanding and, most importantly, it teaches empathy. I doubt that any child could read Charlotte’s Web without empathising with Wilbur when he loses his very dear friend Charlotte, who had saved his life. Or read any one of The Diary of Anne Frank, The Silver Sword or The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas without developing a keen sense of the injustices and atrocities caused by war. So, mums, dads and caregivers, read with your kids. You can start really early, with repetitive texts and rhyming ditties (even babies who don’t yet understand the words will enjoy rhythmic delights, traditional tales and nursery rhymes.) If you make it enjoyable, make it a habit and a part of everyday life, your children will acquire a love of reading, grow in their knowledge and develop empathy, all precious gifts that they can pass onto the next generation in years to come.

Eleanor Cater Eleanor Cater is Brand Manager at Parents Centres New Zealand, a freelance writer and mother of three.


Photo: Courtesy Plunket

Become a reader Research shows that your involvement in your child's reading and learning is more important than anything else in helping them to fulfil their potential. Children who are familiar with books and stories before they start school are better prepared to cope with the demands of formal literacy teaching. There are many reasons why passionate book lovers benefit, largely because reading together is fun and helps build relationships. But books also contain new words that will help build your child's language and understanding.

Children and young adults read more when � they are read to – even when they can read themselves

“Children are made readers in the laps of their parents” Emilie Buchwald

� they see adults around them reading, demonstrating reading as part of their everyday lives � they have access to books plenty of resources and a variety of resources.

Provide access to resources Children read more when they are surrounded by print and have ready access to a variety of reading material. Some ideas for increasing books in the home include: � discuss with your child's preschool, school or library options for borrowing additional resources, like read-aloud chapter books for bedtime reading � make good use of your local public library � swap books with other families � visit specialist children's booksellers, or bookshops with knowledgeable staff to discover the best resources available � encourage gifts of books or book tokens for birthdays and Christmas � visit second-hand bookshops or buy second hand-books online

� visit author Anne Fine's website ‘My home library’ which has Tips and Tricks for developing a home library. She also has a range of free bookplates which can be downloaded, created by notable children's book illustrators. These create a sense of ownership in new or second-hand books.

Make time, place and routines for reading Author and educationalist who specialises in literacy, Mem Fox says that when children spend 15 minutes each day reading or being read to, it will help them become excellent readers, writers and thinkers. It could be in three lots of five minutes. It isn’t much time but it makes a huge difference. Bedtime reading makes a big impact. Especially when children hear the stories, ideas, and vocabulary that comes from being read to at a much higher level than they can read at themselves. As their reading ability increases children will often gradually move to reading to themselves at bedtime. But they will still enjoy and benefit from being read to long after they can read to themselves.

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“The most obvious step [to creating readers] is to provide access to books.” Krashen (2004).

will soon see the reading volume increase. Don’t underestimate how much reading happens with comics, magazines or graphic novels. While formula fiction may not win awards for great literature, when a child hooks into a favourite series and reads them all, their reading mileage soars. Light reading is often the main conduit to heavier reading, once the reading habit is formed. We all read in different ways and Daniel Pennac’s Readers Bill of RIghts is a good message for all readers - young and old.

Reader's Bill of Rights � The right to not read � The right to skip pages � The right to not finish � The right to reread � The right to read anything � The right to escapism � The right to read anywhere

Reading aloud

Listen to your children read

Reading aloud to children is “the single most important activity to help build the knowledge required for reading success…” Reading aloud to your children every day will help them become great readers and listeners, but most of all they will love you for doing it with them and they will remember the times you read to them all their lives!

It is helpful for parents to know some positive “helping strategies” when listening to their children read. Ask your child's teacher for strategies such as 'pause, prompt, praise'.

When you read to your child, you are really saying: � I love you � I value my time with you � I love reading and think it is important.

Talking about books Talking helps children become readers too. Looking at books and talking about the pictures, talking about what you’ve just read, pointing out interesting details in the illustrations, predicting or wondering what will happen next, sharing feelings about the book all help to create readers. Tell your children your family’s own stories and encourage them to tell them to you too.

Be a reading role model Your child walks like you, talks like you, and absorbs everything you do. So set the right example when it comes to reading. If you want your child to be a good reader, be one yourself! Make sure your children sees you reading – often parents do most of their recreational reading when their children are in bed. Talk about what you are reading with your children, and share your favourites from your childhood. When you make it clear that reading is part of your everyday life, you’ll find that reading becomes part of their lives, too.

Let children choose their reading and keep reading fun! One of the best ways to encourage your children to read is to give them plenty of reading which is fun. Keep it light and easy, and you

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� The right to browse � The right to read out loud � The right to not defend your tastes.

Find out more: http://schools.natlib.govt. nz/creating-readers www.myhomelibrary.org Download the 'Help your child become a reader' brochure, now available in English, Ma- ori, Cook Island Ma- ori, Samoan, Tongan, Niuean and Tokelauan.

Compiled by the team at Services to Schools National Library of New Zealand's Services to Schools works to support and create engaged and motivated readers. Research shows that fluent and reflective reading deepens language skills, and engages children’s imagination enabling independent learning.


terrible toddler

“A tantrum is an outlet, an overflow valve when a child’s emotions seem to burst at the seams.” Magda Gerber

tantrums It’s easy to say ‘terrible’ because that is the way that they can make a parent feel. At a loss, out of control and, if thrown in public, often embarrassed. But are they really terrible or a part of normal child development? Magda Gerber, the widely respected child advocate and early childhood educator, said this: “A tantrum is an outlet, an overflow valve when a child’s emotions seem to burst at the seams.” Tantrums are common among 1-5 year olds, particularly in the 18 month to 3 year age range when children have difficulty communicating their needs. The main causes of tantrums are tiredness, hunger and frustration. When parents are busy, pre-occupied or stressed, children are more likely to have tantrums to make sure their needs are being met. Tantrums are an outlet of frustration, a cry for help and a way for a child to make themselves heard.

Dealing with tantrums � Make sure your child is in a safe place; if they are in danger of hurting themselves, others or property they may need to be held

� Don’t try to reason with them or discipline them � Try to stay strong and calm � Be there to comfort the child after the tantrum. Give them words to describe their feelings, “You were really angry/upset/frustrated because…” Giving them words helps them to understand what just happened. � Remember that their feelings are real, respect them. � Make sure you do not give into any demands which might have started the tantrum; you are setting boundaries � Discuss the incident some time after the event, once again respecting their feelings as real. These conscious parenting tips come from Parents Centres Parenting with Purpose programme. Check out our website to enquire when this programme will be running at Centre near you. www.parentscentre.org.nz


top top10 10tips tips

for the

3 trimester rd

Helping you out from weeks 28 to 40+ Tips from The New Zealand Pregnancy Book.

1

School of pregnancy

2

Can't get no sleep...

3

Toilet tripping again

4

Baby's position

5

Kick start

6

Breast changes

Held once or twice a week, pregnancy and parenting classes are great for women and their partners or support person to learn more about expectations, meet other parents-to-be and begin those exercises and breathing techniques. Check out www.parentscentre.org.nz for more or ask your LMC for information about local classes that are District Health Board funded.

Trouble sleeping? You're pretty much limited to sleeping on your side, sometimes a soft pillow under your tummy helps or use it to support your top leg. Avoid sleeping on your back. Even if you have to get up and visit the toilet in the night, return to bed and get valuable rest – you'll often drift off again. Once you settle, baby will too!

As your uterus grows, your bladder gets squashed meaning you'll spend time running to the toilet again. Pressure on your bowel can mean constipation strikes – eat plenty of vegetables, lots of fibre and drink enough water.

He or she is on the move! Your LMC will determine baby's position by pushing quite firmly just above your pelvis with their hands. Top tip! Relax your tummy muscles and visit the bathroom beforehand – it'll feel much more comfortable.

Feel like baby will be a footballer, ballerina or karate black-belt? You'll begin to detect a daily pattern of baby's movements, so take note of when your baby moves – it should be at least 10 times in 2–4 hours. Talk to your LMC if you are worried about your baby's movements.

Those milk-producing hormones have now taken control of your breasts! Small amounts of milk – colostrum – start being produced, and you may notice a few drops at your nipples.


7

And squeeze

8

Skinny genes

9

Double the fun

10 ial specer off

20 off

Visit The New Zealand Pregnancy Book online at www.nzpregnancybook.co.nz

After week 20, make sure you do daily pelvic floor exercises to prevent incontinence (both before and after birth). Keep these up – if you can control these muscles, it'll help during birth.

The website includes a searchable preview of the book, fantastic photos and feedback from the NZPB community, links to friends and Facebook and much more! �

As the skin of your tummy stretches, it can become itchy and red stretch marks can appear. Some women find massaging their skin beneficial, and the lines do fade after birth! Try almond oil to relieve itchiness, but test it on a small area of skin first.

850 sets of twins and 10 sets of triplets are born every year in New Zealand. With multiple pregnancies, be prepared for more antenatal visits, more tests and a closely monitored labour to give you all optimal care.

Birth plan Keep this flexible! And remember to include preferences on any pain relief and active intervention, should they be needed. Chat with your LMC about this and you'll feel much more prepared

%

The New Zealand Pregnancy Book by Sue Pullon and Cheryl Benn, 2008, Bridget Williams Books, $49.99, is great source of information, covering every kind of topic for pregnant women, along with personal stories. Order online from www.parentscentre.org.nz Find out more at www.nzpregnancybook.co.nz

ents Centre all Par r o f $40 the online shop m SPE CIAL OFFER o r ble f members – availa THE New Zealand guide to: + pregnancy + birth + baby’s first 3 months

become a fan of the book follow us

www.parentscentre.org.nz


finding the right fit Last issue, we explored the fact that children with the healthiest and most supple feet are those who spend most of their time barefoot. There’s nothing better for children’s feet than walking and running barefoot, as it develops the muscles and ligaments of the lower limb and naturally strengthens the arches of the foot. This practice also enhances and improves awareness of where we are in relation to the space around us. But, living in the real world, I have purchased several pairs of shoes for my one-year-old. Shoes protect your child from the cold or from harsh surfaces; they are used for sport and for dressing up. The previous article outlined potential dangers to your child from wearing shoes so it’s important to consider when to introduce shoes and what to look for when you buy. For a healthy start for your baby, avoid pre-walking shoes. Baby’s feet are cartilage (like the ear). Growing rapidly, they can become shaped (or deformed) by shoes or compression socks. The best footwear for babies are wool booties with room for their toes to wiggle.

26 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

When your wee one begins to toddle then make or buy booties or soft slippers that yield to movement. We brought some great “mugaluggs” online. For only $16 and brand new, these shoes had flexible leather soles, soft sheepskin inside and crocheted wool tops. They allowed my son natural bending of the toes and ankle and spreading of his toes. When your child starts walking on the pavement it’s time for shoes to provide protection from the weather, or unforgiving surfaces. Sadly, shoes can distort your child’s feet before your child feels uncomfortable. For this reason it’s important to take the time to get the right shoe and a proper fit. For a normal foot I recommend lightweight, wide, soft, low or no heeled shoes with a thin, flexible sole. Look for a wide shoe with broad toes. Feel along both sides of the ball of the foot. Ensure some free space between the side of the shoe and the foot. Shoe sales people may advise you to buy tighter shoes. They are not aware of developmental anatomy and that a tight fit will deform a child’s growing foot. Then feel inside, avoid arch inserts or stiff sides. To test this, bend the toe towards the heel. The right shoe should bend in the middle. If it bends towards the


toe it has unnecessary supports. But what about hard surfaces? Do we need special shoes? When sales people approach you with persuasive arguments as to why a supportive sports shoe is best for your child just show them this article. Research shows when barefoot or in a light shoe we adapt our walking and running styles to a graceful non-pounding landing, placing less stress on our feet and ankles than if we wore a supportive soled shoe. There is a growing movement amongst sports shoe manufacturers to providing for fully flexible soles for natural movement. Then it’s time to check for length, with your child standing, use your fingers to feel your child’s toes. Look for a good one to one and a half centimeters from the edge of the toes to give space to grow. Daily childhood barefoot time develops foot strength, appropriate full body biomechanics and turns on their core muscles. It’s the first five years of life that are the most important in foot development, and this is the time when parents have the most influence. Today’s society has an expectation of wearing shoes everywhere all the time. This is a bad habit that’s begun inside our generation and it’s only happened since footwear became cheap. I thoroughly encourage you to enjoy some barefoot time yourself. When you try going barefoot yourself for a few days you will note how amazingly quickly your feet feel alive. Experience the sense of joy this is what your body was designed to do…reconnect with your inner child and don’t deprive your child of enjoying theirs. �

Prevent problems later in life � There are times when our children can frolic safely without shoes, but sometimes their feet need protection from external elements. A shoe that closely mimics the barefoot is the best option. Look for a shoe made of soft leather as this allows for natural movement and the growth of developing feet; and a flat, flexible sole which enables sensory feedback from the ground. A shoe should match the shape of the foot, and not the other way around. A child’s foot is wider at the toes and narrow at the heel. Foot trouble among children is almost always caused by shoes, and in fact most adults’ foot trouble would either not exist or would be much less bothersome if properly – shaped shoes had been worn during childhood or, better yet, if those people had gone barefoot. Choosing the right shoes for your children will help prevent long-term foot and postural problems for the rest of their life. Barefoot is best! Tracy Byrne, Podiatrist

Janine McKenzie-Minifie

Find out more: www.theguardian.com/ lifeandstyle/2010/aug/09/barefootbest-for-children www.phillipbeach.com/archetypal_ postures.html http://breakingmuscle.com/family-kids/ katy-bowman-and-the-biomechanics-ofhuman-growth-barefoot-babies www.unshod.org/pfbc/ www.bobux.co.nz

Janine is a clinical neuromuscular therapist (CNMT) and a mother of three. She owns Total Performance Health Limited with offices in central Wellington and in Ngaio. She holds a Bachelor of Health Science and Certification in CNMT, Therapeutic Massage, Pharmacy, Nutrition and Exercise. She is passionate about her work helping clients to reduce pain and improve their health.

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passionate

about good food Head chef and dietitian at My Food Bag, Nadia Lim is a passionate foodie with a mission to design exciting, easy-to-follow recipes, with the best possible ingredients and produce.

Roast chicken pieces with potatoes, vegetables and gravy Vegetables Vegetables

Gravy

“Eating healthy has to be fun and taste great,” Nadia explains. “I believe My Food Bag is simply a brilliant way of bringing beautiful produce, healthy recipes and delicious flavours together at home. I am a firm believer in the real food philosophy – eating food from the ground, sea or sky (not the factories).

1 butternut, halved and seeds removed

1 tablespoon butter

"My cooking style is seasonally focused. Maintaining a seasonal focus means better choice and quality of produce, and avoids the imported produce that has sat around for months in cool storage. It also means that you're buying and supporting locally grown New Zealand made product. I create new recipes every season, ensuring locally grown, nutritious recipes are found in every My Food Bag."

1–2 tablespoon olive oil

600g agria potatoes 2 carrots 1 red onion

200g round beans

2 cloves garlic, minced 3 tablespoons flour Large pinch pepper teaspoon salt 1 cup boiling water

Chicken

2 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce

5 chicken thighs

To serve

5 chicken drumsticks

1 tablespoon thyme leaves*

1 tablespoon of spice mix: (1 tsp garlic salt, 1 tsp ground cumin, 1 tsp paprika, ½ tsp white pepper) 1 tablespoon of thyme leaves (optional, adults)

Gluten free – omit the gravy Dairy free – omit the gravy

Ready in 45 minutes Prep time 15 mins Cook time 35 mins

Method Preheat oven to 200°C. Line two roasting trays with baking paper. Bring kettle to boil.

1 2 3 4

Cut butternut and potatoes into 4–5 cm pieces; peel carrots and cut into quarters; cut red onion into quarters. Toss vegetables (not beans) with olive oil and season with salt on prepared tray. Roast for about 30 minutes (turning once), or until cooked through and golden. Pat chicken dry with paper towels. Place onto second roasting tray and season with salt, chicken spices and thyme (if using). Roast for 25 minutes, until golden and cooked through. While the vegetables and chicken roast, prepare the beans. Trim and place into a small pot with about ½ cup of water and cover. When chicken is cooked, bring to the boil on high heat and steam for 2–3 minutes, or until bright green and tender. Remove chicken from oven when cooked, remove from tray and cover with foil to rest.


Place roasting tray on top of an element on the stove. Heat on a low heat and add butter add garlic and fry until soft, about 30 seconds. Add flour, pepper and salt and simmer for 1 minute. Gradually pour in boiling water and stir until smooth, 2–3 minutes. Add Worcestershire sauce and season to taste with salt and pepper. Stir in any resting juices from the chicken.

5

TO SERVE, place 1–2 pieces of roast chicken and some vegetables and beans on to each plate. Pour over gravy and garnish with thyme.

ENERGY

3108kJ (733kcal)

CARBOHYDRATE

32.9g

PROTEIN

44.8g

FAT

47.7g

SERVES 5

Per Serve

� Kiwiparent readers who sign up for foodbag will get a free seasonal fruitbag valued at $14.99 on the first order (new members only). Just use the promo code: KIWIPARENT_919 Available from July 28, 2014 to midnight August 20, 2014.


sustaining

support There’s nothing like a significant birthday or anniversary to make you take stock. As members of Parents Centre you know this only to well. Two years ago, with the organisation celebrating 60 years, the cover of this very magazine asked “Just how far have we come?’

30 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years


You don’t need me to tell you ‘a very long way!’ Or, as Bernadette Hunt, from Gore Parents Centre wrote in her guest editorial: “Parents Centre provides support in a really unique, ‘no strings attached’ kind of way that is desperately important... the gap it fills for so many parents is absolutely as essential now as it was 60 years ago.” Hear, hear I thought when, as an invited speaker at your National Parenting Forum that September, I was reminded of all Parents Centre has achieved and how closely allied our two organisations were and, thankfully, still are. This year, to mark the golden jubilee of La Leche League in New Zealand a special book is to be released; Latching On: 50 years of breastfeeding support – La Leche League in New Zealand 1964–2014. The book becomes available in October and, as one of the people overseeing the publishing process, I am thinking once again of the importance of our alliance. Throughout the 50 years of La Leche League’s presence in New Zealand Parents Centre has been alongside and this is clearly portrayed in Latching On, which mentions, for example, early collaboration between our two organisations. That I have been writing in Kiwiparent for over three years (my goodness how time flies) is further testimony to the healthy relationship we have fostered and indeed the respect in which we hold each other’s principles. It is perhaps support though which is of the most value. And, just as support can help mums achieve their breastfeeding goals, so does professional support help promote awareness so that more mums might achieve successful outcomes.

We know that one of the biggest barriers to breastfeeding is lack of support. Without the encouragement of a partner, mother or wider - nau, many women feel isolated wha and unable to overcome challenges that may arise. Fifty years ago early La Leche League Leaders, following in the footsteps of their counterparts in the United States, began what has been widely described as ‘a quiet revolution’. At a time when breastfeeding rates were low and breastfeeding was rarely seen, they turned the tide and changed the way Kiwi babies were fed. Latching On is a fascinating account of what followed over the next 50 years as La Leche League groups sprang up across the country. The impact was far reaching; not only did New Zealand’s breastfeeding rates soar but, in making breastfeeding a more public and, at times, controversial issue, the organisation drew attention to the need to support and protect a woman’s right to breastfeed.

We are proud to have shared much of that journey with Parents Centre.

" I want my baby to have breast milk for the first six months" mums told us.

1 LATCHING ON

LOUISE SHAW

Latching On

50 YEARS OF BREASTFEEDING SUPPORT

La Leche League in New Zealand 1964–2014

Lisa Manning is a former TV journalist and presenter. She is married to the British actor John Rhys-Davies with whom she has an eight-year-old daughter Maia. Lisa is an at-home mum and La Leche League Leader in Pukekohe.

Our simply intuitive™ electric and manual pumps ensure maximum efficiency and comfort. Their soft touch feel mimics the natural action of your baby breastfeeding to encourage fast let down and efficient expressing. Both pump packs come with everything you need to sterilise, express, store and feed.

The result? Breastfeeding for longer has never been easier.


it takes

a dad

This year will be my fourth Father's Day as a dad and my fortieth as a son. My son, affectionately named “Noodle” in my public writings, is only three. But I call this my fourth because, as I see it, the minute we found out there was a beating heart and bunch of organs gestating inside his mother, the inevitable future shaped my present into fatherhood. I started taking care of him by taking care of her, and I've kept at it since I quit my regular job and became a stay-at-home dad two months after he was born. Being a stay-at-home dad means two things: First, I've got an unusual – though increasingly mainstream – take on dadding; second, most folks don't think I have a job. I'll point out the obvious: I write. I squeeze freelance gigs in the cracks between my full-time course of rejected chicken dinners and pee-soaked sheets. Writing's my part-time job, fraught with as much rejection as I get from my fussy Noodle, though resulting in markedly less urine on my bedclothes – at least in any literal sense. The point is that my job is to keep Noodle safe and raise him as best I can. My passion is to get better at this job and to document the ins and outs of doing so. As far as I've figured to this point, and I suppose it's obvious, Noodle wouldn't be who he is without me –

32 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

It's a time when we bloom back out of our houses and on to the beaches and sausage sizzles and gear up for bursts of summer fun. We start to show our wild sides – our diversity without all I do and don't do. But it cuts both ways: I wouldn't be who I am now without him. We need each other, but sometimes more than anything else, I find, it takes a dad. You learn these lessons in unexpected moments at the dentist, on the first day of school, riding a horse for the first time. And later in life, when a good old fashioned heart to heart chat can solve in a minute what's puzzled you for days. Being a dad and having a dad can be equally humbling experiences. My dad is a good man. It took me a while to see that. He might have had his own demons for a while – and who doesn't? – when he first had kids. I can sympathise with all that now. His passion then was carpentry, and it still is today. But when I was born he had a desk job and a toddler and that can sure tamp down creative sparks. Now that I really get it, I don't blame him anymore; I un-learned the blame game and I took a look at myself instead. I learned that a stubborn refusal to forgive is its own species of demon; it took getting to know my dad to realise that. When my dad and I finally reunited, we built a guitar together, put it in a local woodworker's show, and though it didn't win any ribbons, did it ever look a prize with father's and son's names on it. Through it all, I wouldn't be me without all he did and didn't do. I am me because of the withs and the withouts. It took my dad to make me me.


Brian Sorrell Brian has worked as a cook, typist, computer programmer, woodworker, bicycle repairman, and university lecturer, all of which inadequately prepared him for his current fulltime role as Dad. In February 2012, the family packed up their house in California and relocated to Auckland, where he now specialises in chasing his always-on-the-run son, and recording their adventures in memoir form. He is currently compiling these writings into a book. www.DaddingFullTime.com

Wishing all the great Kiwi Dads a

happy

fathers day on Sunday, September 7, 2014 I suppose I should say that I grew up in America, where Father's Day is in the middle of summer rather than the start of spring. But it makes sense to me to position it as we in New Zealand do on the calendar. Spring is rebirth, to pick a cliché out of thin air. It's a time when new stuff blooms, dormant through the winter and ready to show its colours. It's a time when we bloom back out of our houses and on to the beaches and sausage sizzles and gear up for bursts of summer fun. We start to show our wild sides – our diversity. And this is what Father's Day is about, as far as I can tell, because Father's Day isn't about one guy. It's about all of us. I'm not here to demonise bad dads or deify the good ones; I'm not here to judge anyone, because that'll never be my place. All I want to say is that Father's Day is not just about guys with kids. We all have fathers – even those we lost are still in us. We all have cause to pause and appreciate the diversity of men it takes to raise kids. Stay-at-home dad writers, woodworkers and luthiers, doctor dads, lawyer dads, teacher dads, rugby star dads, mayor dads, Family Guys, and the guy who left it to Beaver. We all share this experience of being fathered, and some have tried their hands at fathering as well. That's about all there is to figure out. This world's got heaps of influences bearing on us all the time. I don't mind singling out and being singled out one day of the year, especially if it jogs me to notice, once again, that I'm not alone. And that sometimes it takes a dad. �

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which is your favourite child?

I was at the park with my two toddlers the other day. The sun was shining after two days of rain and the children were almost salivatingly feral from being cooped up indoors. I parked the double pram, untangled them from their seat straps, blinked... and they were gone. Wildly I looked around and immediately saw two little clouds of Pigpen dust marking their progress as their feet, blurry with speed, flew across the ground. One little cloud of dust was heading toward the lake – the other toward the busy road. This is one of those nightmarish moments that wakes me gasping and sweaty in the middle of the night, a moment that sends me scuttling into their room to check that they're still happily asleep, inhaling that sweet scent of contented child guaranteed to bring a racing heartbeat down to normality. But in the bright light of panicked day there was no time to gasp. There was only time to take action. But which way was I going to go? WHICH ONE WAS I GOING TO SAVE? Out of sheer mischief I often ask my friends which of their children is their favourite. Invariably the reaction is the same. A vigorous shaking of the head, and an adamant, "Oh no, we love them the same." This, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, is utter rubbish. It is impossible to love your children the same just as it is impossible to love oranges and apples the same. One is juicy, one is crunchy. One has to be peeled, the other has a core. Advantages, disadvantages. We love them for different reasons but not in the same way. For example, I love my son because he is my firstborn. Because it took 29 hours of excruciating labour to bring him into the world and that makes it worth it. Because he is smart and loving, has big hair and can sleep

34 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

through the night. I love my daughter because she is a girl and I understand her. I love her because she is easygoing, funny, devastatingly cute, and eats whatever I put in front of her. I don't like my son when he refuses to get dressed and cries and screams and kicks me. I don't like my daughter when she has awakened me ten times in the same night for a different reason (thirsty, monsters, nightlight on, nightlight off, pillowcase needs changing, bed needs to be turned around, where's the moon, etc). Sometimes my son is my favourite, other times my daughter is. On this particular occasion at the park, I was facing a dilemma – right now they were both my favourites. So which one? WHICH ONE? Thankfully (and a special shout out goes to the angels for helping), my little girl's feet, unreliable at the best of times, chose that moment to perform an erratic acrobatic tumble. I was able to get to my boy before he flung himself headlong into the lake, and trot back to her still flailing and wailing, safe in the dust. Before I packed them back into the pram, indignant, dirty and snotty, I hugged each one as tightly as I could. For I love them both so much. Just… not the same.

Stephanie Matuku Popular blogger, Stephanie Matuku, is an accidental stay-at-home Mum to two busy pre-schoolers. In a previous life she was a radio creative writer, voiceover artist and occasional actor. She is an award-winning playwright, sporadic exerciser and aspiring novelist. She regrets once being a childless person who liked to dispense parenting advice. Sorry.


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endorsed by

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Vibe review

a cushy ride We were lucky to be chosen recently to review the Phil & Teds Vibe 2 Buggy. My only comparison as far as double prams go is a mountain buggy duet. We made a lot of little trips, had a few decent shopping excursions, it accompanied us to a funeral and it dragged me along on a very, very long walk. Unpacking it was nice and easy though it did take some time to put the wheels on – the man of the house refused to read any instructions so struggled with figuring out how to put the guards on the back wheels but once that was sorted, we were away. Personally, I don’t like the way it folds. Perhaps I never figured out the way to carry it but everytime I did, I would be pinching my fingers between the bars. It does, however, fold fairly compact and the quick release on the wheels is handy to fit it into smaller cars. For the kids, it seems an extremely comfortable. The cushy ride covers are very… well… cushy! My very tall two-year-old could tuck his legs up when he wanted to and looked nice and snug sleeping in it. My six-month-old in the double seat seemed equally comfortable for the most part. My only concern was when she fell asleep, she would sort of slouch to one side because there was nothing to stop this happening. It may be different if there were a hood on the doubles kit however. The lever to lie back the double seat made it very easy to get her in and out without too much fuss. Putting Mr Two in the doubles seat was a big no-no though as he just did not seem comfortable. His head was partly above the end of the seat so he was fidgeting a lot (so we would not have been able to use this with a newborn in the main seat and him in the double at all) The hood is awesome. I loved being able to move it right down when Miss six months was asleep in the main part of the buggy – it kept her shielded from distractions and lights while we shopped. Pushing and steering the pram was awesome. It turned easily, went up and down curbs and bumps

36 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

with no issue and can be pushed with one hand. It was light to push with both kids in and we even managed to get it on the bus (and the buses here are horrible little mini buses so we have struggled with big pushchairs in the past). I did find it difficult in shops sometimes – particularly Farmers which is notorious for having too-skinny aisles – I would push the front through and having misjudged it, the back wheels would hit everything. However, after using it a few times I started getting better at judging this (on saying that, the last time I used it, it still took me two tries to get through the doorway!) I found the brakes difficult to use. It took a lot of hand strength to take them off – I would have to use two hands to do it sometimes. Then I’d go to walk forward which didn’t work – you need to move the wheels backwards a tiny bit first before going forward. The upside was the button was easy to put them on in a hurry – and the downside to that is that my partner kept accidentally hitting it while pushing the pram (though this never happened to me). The handle bar is nicely shaped. My partner found it too small for his large hands though - it curved downwards too soon. But the adjustable handlebar was great for us as I am very short while he is very tall. All in all it was an awesome pram to use. Easy to push and very comfortable. The only real downside is the difficulty in using the parcel tray – but I suppose this is to be expected when your child’s feet are in it!

Anna French


k elight handling p rb po

from

newb orn

to

2 toddle rs


top 5 tips on how to choose the ideal buggy to suit your lifestyle As parents we know that choosing your first buggy can be a daunting task with so many different styles and brands available. As a first-time parent, it’s also difficult to know what you really need from a buggy and how much your life will change with a little one in tow. Going out for a walk or getting around shops will never be the same. Once baby arrives, it’s a whole new world with new things you need to consider such as will you need to navigate stairs, what terrains you’ll cross or the size of doorways and aisles. To demystify the world of buggies, we’ve put together a list of our top tips on how to choose the ideal buggy for your lifestyle. We’ve based these tips on years of experience (as nursery product designers and as parents ourselves) and from feedback from customers. Here are the top five things to consider when researching your perfect buggy. Once you start using a buggy, you’ll realise how vital to your everyday lifestyle this piece of baby kit is.

1

Manoeuvrability We can’t say enough about the importance of a buggy designed for light handling and manoeuvrability. When trying out buggies in store, test how easy it is to manoeuvre one-handed (essential for multi-tasking!) and getting around narrow shop aisles and displays. Some buggies offer superior kerb pop – which is the ability to get over kerbs without the need to apply a

lot of pressure to the handle to bring the front wheels up. Good kerb pop will mean that you barely need to slow down to get over a kerb. Ask in store if they have a weight to put in the buggy and then see how easy it is to ‘pop’ the front wheels up.

2

3

Longevity If you’re planning to have more children, consider a buggy that can adapt to take a second child. Inline buggies offer great longevity because they can be used as a single, and then have a second seat added at a later stage. Some buggies offer the ability to use the second seat as a parent facing seat option, giving you two uses for one accessory and a reason to buy the second seat right away. Some double side-byside buggies offer the ability to replace one seat with a carry bag so it can be used as a single buggy with plenty of storage. Thinking about your family’s future growth will save you having to buy another buggy later on. Adaptability As baby grows, the gear you need to get out and about will change. There are many options to allow you to adapt your buggy to meet your changing needs. Consider whether you want to be able to use your buggy as a travel system with a car seat capsule, do you want carrycot, do you want to have a parent-facing seat option, do you want the ability to take one or two children and do you need a scooter board attachment for

38 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

a toddler? choose a brand that enables you to adapt your buggy as your needs change and you’ll get much more use out of your buggy because it fits in with your lifestyle.

4

5

Usage Be realistic about what you plan to use the buggy for. If you weren’t a runner before baby, you’re unlikely to become one after so don’t make this your number one consideration. If you plan to do a lot of walking, then choose a buggy that is suitable for multiple terrains. If you will be catching public transport, consider something compact, lightweight and easy to fold. Weight of the buggy Buggies come in different weights depending on what they’ve been designed to do. For example, a fully featured buggy that can handle multi-terrains or take more than one child can be up to 13kgs, whereas a travel buggy can be as light as 6kgs. The less functionality that the buggy offers the lighter it will be. You’ll need to weigh up functionality vs weight to determine what you’re happy to live with. Consider how high your car is because you’ll need to lift the folded buggy into the boot. A well-designed fully featured buggy will still be light to push and manoeuvre around shopping aisles and over kerbs.

Watch for more tips in thenext issue. Melissa Zgomba, Phil&Teds


Parents Centre For six decades proudly educating and supporting parents through the early years. What drove this organisation back in 1952 from its very beginnings continues to drive us today – and it’s as simple as this: parents have the right to good information so they can make informed choices. In the decades since 1952 our range of classes has certainly expanded but their central purpose hasn’t: we provide the very best, researched information and respect parents to make their own informed choices.

In this section Facilitation training for success Music and Movement Programmes Parents Centre Week in pictures

It was Marianne Williamson, author and lecturer, who said, “There is no single effort more radical in its potential for saving the world than a transformation of the way we raise our children.” At Parents Centre we truly believe that quality parenting can have an enormous influence on our world and it’s our ongoing challenge to continue to reach out to every demographic to influence quality parenting, today and in future generations. Great facilitators in our Centres help us to do that across the country. Our suite of eight national programmes aim to arm parents with the knowledge and tools they require to grow great children. These programmes are detailed, research-based and taught with proven advanced teaching techniques, built with the benefit of decades of wisdom and research. In this section we detail our facilitation training opportunities and meet one of our facilitators, Tracy Ball, who says she has benefitted enormously from attending the training sessions. Go to our website to find out more and to enquire when training might be running at a Centre near you.

www.parentscentre.org.nz

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kiwiparent

39


––––

Facilitation training for success What do you do when, in a parent education programme or perhaps a committee meeting, you are confronted with a difficult question, a difficult situation or even a difficult personality? There’s so much to think about and so much that goes through your mind and yes, it can become a very challenging situation. What to do, what to say, how to manage this whole experience? Facilitation training can provide an answer. Facilitation training explores many of these types of situations and gives ideas and techniques to try, and what techniques can be implemented as preventions and interventions. Whether it’s a meeting, a parenting programme, large or small, someone has to shape and guide the process of how the group will work together. A good facilitator will be able to guide people through the process and doesn’t have to have all the knowledge. Many people think the facilitator is the person who is the ‘seat of wisdom’ and has all the answers. No, not the case – the facilitator should have the skills to ensure that a group

interacts effectively, has a clear purpose and outcome and works towards an agreed goal, all the time ensuring that the group interacts in a participatory and respectful way. It is important to understand that facilitation is not about being a counsellor, nor is it about being an educator or a trainer. There is a clear difference and once you have the skills to facilitate effectively, you can work with many different types of groups or situations. Facilitation is more than a “group agreement”. Why do volunteers need facilitation skills? If Centres want to effectively plan, have everyone involved and create great leadership learning and opportunities, then facilitation is a strong and a right “fit” within Parents Centre. Good facilitators can empower others and encourage people to be involved – this can be within a committee environment, a work environment or as a parent working with other parents. Facilitation is a skill and an art. Within Parents Centre we provide an opportunity for volunteers and members to come together through these workshops to try out skills, to learn new skills and to understand what the art of facilitation is all about! Participants can learn techniques and can improve their own abilities through practice, practice and more practice. Before the practicing starts it’s important to know the basics of good facilitation and that’s what Parents Centre offers. We’ve run a number of facilitation training weekends across the organisation for volunteers, prison facilitators and those wishing to run the conscious parenting programmes. We have further upcoming opportunities in Wellington, Nelson and Christchurch. If you’re interested please contact me at development@ parentscentre.org.nz for more information. If you want to know more about the art of facilitation and extend your learning and your experience and perhaps even to add something to your own CV, then contact me to find out more. You won’t be disappointed with the experience.

Joan Hay, Manager Capability and Development

40 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years


Facilitation training for success – one participant’s story

Effective facilitation is important for the delivery of parent education programmes. There is no better advertisement than from those who have completed facilitation training with Parents Centre. Eleanor Cater chats with Tracy Ball from Central Hawke’s Bay about what facilitation training meant to her. Back in 2010 Tracy Ball was at the local Waipukurau doctors surgery with her son and happened to browse through a magazine that was sitting on a rack. That magazine was called Kiwiparent and in it was an advertisement seeking applicants for prison facilitators for parenting programmes in prisons. “I thought to myself that I would really like to do that job, something that would really make a difference. I had, about a year beforehand, completed a national certificate in adult education and wondered if I might be suitably qualified.” A phone call later Tracy found out she was.

to facilitate increases you will continue to improve as there is already a solid base there.” “Joan Hay is an amazing facilitator. I don’t have idols. Ever. But watching her in action I thought ‘I want to be just like this woman’!” So what is so good about the training? “It’s the superb way it is run. Joan incorporates all different aspects needed and makes it interactive, informative, fun, a great mix of formal and informal. She gave us a clear outline and we all gleaned so much from her level of experience. Because she’s been doing it so long she’s so natural.” At times, Tracy says, much of the training was really affirming. “Some of it was “oh my goodness I am doing it right”! That was really helpful and helped me to grow in confidence but also I picked up additional skills that I could focus on developing.” So what would Tracy say to a volunteer who was considering taking up a facilitation training opportunity with Parents Centre? “If you are going to attend any facilitation training programme make it this one. Joan is the most amazing facilitator. I’ve done a lot of training over the years and Joan’s style and her personality makes it by far the best training I’ve ever attended.”​ Facilitation training with Joan Hay

She attended a training weekend for prison facilitators, which she says was very beneficial. Later, because of Tracy’s prison work, the local Central Hawke’s Bay Parents Centre, approached her to deliver their Magic Moments Programme. A prerequisite was further facilitation training and the opportunity came up to attend a dedicated weekend of training in Wellington. “I jumped at the chance. Because I had previously attended the prison facilitators training with Parents Centre I knew that it would be good. I knew it would beneficial and I would gain a lot out of it. I’d seen these women in action!” Tracy says that the weekend surpassed her considerable expectations and was an enormously beneficial experience for her, both personally and professionally. “I wouldn’t hesitate to do it again, I’d be going again this year if I could, because I know I would be picking up something new, something else that I didn’t get last time. I think as your confidence and ability

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National

Parents Centres Week

1.

15–21 June 2014 How we celebrated Parents Centre Week around the country 6.

7.

13. 14.

23.

24.

1. 2. 3. 4.

5. 6. 7.

15.

25.

Joint celebration cake – 25 years Ashburton Parents Centre, 20 years PORSE Ashburton. Cutting the cake – Debbie Kell, Fiona Tait and Lizzie Redfern from PORSE Ashburton. Ashburton Parents Centre, joint artwork created with PORSE. Enthralled audience at Ashburton Parents Centre's 'One for the Kids' free. puppeteer show. Ashburton Parents Centre ‘Tiny Tots Disco’. Ashburton Parents Centre ‘One for the Kids’ cookery classes. Current and past committee members in Ashburton.

42 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

16.

26.

8.

27.

Franklin Parents Centre committee members sort donations for their Clothing Drive. 9–10. Gore Parents Centre turns 30. 11–12. Gore Parents Centre ‘Monster Market’. 13. Mana Parents Centre free car seat clinic with Baby on the Move. 14. Baby Phoenix, the first baby born at Kenepuru Hospital during Parents Centre Week. 15. Child Restraint Technician Jo Boxall adjusts carseats for Mana Parents Centre in Porirua. 16. Mana Parents Centre 2014 Committee. 17–18. Manukau Parents Centre ‘Fairy and Pirate Party’ (photos courtesy of www.facebook.com/ cugglesandluvs).


2.

3.

5.

4.

8. 9.

10.

12.

11.

17. 18.

28.

29.

19.

30.

19.

31.

Napier Parents Centre ‘Open Morning’ – Jemma Price, Stephanie May Carroll with their little ones. 20. Nelson District Parents Centre selling Jaffa Race tickets. 21–22. Nelson District Parents Centre hosting the Pio Parenting Show (21 Bev Hamilton, 22 Lizl Matthewson hosting the show). 23–24. Onewa Parents Centre free family kite day at Monarch Park. 25. Sack races at Taieri Parents Centre family fun day. 26–27. Taupo Parents Centre Music and Movement session and kids disco.

22.

21.

20.

32.

33.

28–29. Wairarapa Parents Centre Music and Movement (28 Carole and Parker, 29 Karina with Ivy). 30. Greymouth Parents Centre presented a basket to the proud parents of the first baby born at Greymouth Hospital during Parents Centre Week. 31. Greymouth Parents Centre Teddy Bear's Picnic as part of a Music and Movement session. 32–33. Cupcake making at Wellington North Parents Centre.

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This month:

spotlight on Music and Movement Each edition of Kiwiparent profiles one of Parents Centres renowned parent education programmes. Parents Centres ‘Music and Movement’ is a programme welcoming caregivers with their babies and toddlers to join in with a host of different musical activities. The programme includes fun with singing, musical instruments and action songs. It is run by enthusiastic leaders who interact personally with the parents and children. Children are also given the opportunity to dance using props such as scarves and ribbons, lycra sheets, bubble makers, poi, balls, balloons etc. Hand-action songs and finger rhymes allow children to interact with other children and their caregiver. Some groups include themes in the programme – such as a teddy bears’ picnic, invited special guests and encouraging children to dress up in their favourite

44 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

costumes and dance, or act out nursery rhymes or other favourite songs. The Music and Movement programme offers endless opportunities for a vast variety of music and stimulating activities. Learning through play is a big part of the Music and Movement philosophy. Children enjoy the sounds, the colours, the activities and the interaction, at the same time channelling their energy into active learning. Contact your local Centre through www.parentscentre.org.nz for details of programmes running in your area.


Celebrating our volunteers Every month, in conjunction with Huggies products, Parents Centres acknowledge the extraordinary contribution volunteers make to their communities through their local Parents Centre. To find out more about volunteering with Parents Centre visit www.parentscentre.org.nz/volunteers

Catriona Eagles,Taupo Parents Centre “Catriona, the driving force behind the development of Rangiatea Childbirth Education classes specifically for Maori, is an exceptional leader. She has a real passion for our Centre and has dedicated herself to our community for many years.”

Our most recent ‘Volunteers of the Month’ Belinda Barnett, Manukau Parents Centre “Belinda is always full of ideas and energy. She has great people skills, putting her background in Human Resources into practise for our Centre. We are very lucky to have her on board!”

Conscious parenting

– want to know more?

Check out upcoming programmes at your local Parents Centre: www.parentscentre.org.nz Browse through the resources here: www.skip.org.nz Join ‘Conscious Parenting’ pages and groups on Facebook Research online and read, read, read!

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perfection tiny packages of At 28 weeks I was told that I had a condition called pre-eclampsia which was discovered from an additional scan and traces of protein in my urine. Immediately I was injected with steroids which would mature my baby’s lungs and make it easier for him to breath. Because of my severity and the fact that I was only 28 weeks pregnant, we were taken to Waikato Hospital where I stayed for one night, but because there was no room, we were taken to Auckland City Hospital. Our son Lucas was delivered by emergency C-section and weighed just 1000grams and was 37.5cm long. His head was only the size of a tennis ball – he was tiny. When he arrived he was whipped away to NICU and it was only on day five that we got to hold him for the first time. After a week in Auckland we were taken to Waikato again where we stayed about 30 days, then back to Rotorua where we stayed for a further two weeks. Finally on October the 12th he came home. We were so over the moon to have him home after spending so long in hospital. I was so alone and scared through my journey, I was away from my home town, away from my family, and in fear of my baby’s life at times. Because of my

experience I started a support group called “Early Buds” to give comfort to other parents going through the same situation. As the founder of this organisation, I fully understand the need for this sort of outreach. My own personal journey through the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) and the Special Care Baby Unit (SCBU) was a difficult one which could have been made much easier with more support and information. This motivated me to prepare special ‘prep packs’ to try and meet this need for other families. We have a great cause which we are so passionate about, we know the need is out there and we are determined to meet it. When someone you know suddenly has a premature baby, you may find yourself wondering how to react, especially if the baby is particularly early, small or unwell. But more importantly, how can you support them in this precious time? Here are a few suggestions that will help you to make life easier for a family going though a stressful time.

Celebrate the birth Celebrate the birth of their baby as you would if the baby was full-term by sending a card, gift, or flowers as you intended. Despite all the worries associated with their early arrival, this baby is very special and very much loved.


Send a card as soon as possible Don’t wait until the baby comes home to send a card (although you could always send a “welcome home” card then too). If you buy a card, be sensitive and choose one without a picture of a big fat full-term baby on it. Some people worry about sending a congratulations card because they are not sure if the baby will live. However most prem babies do survive, and in the awful circumstances where a baby does not come home, the parents will really treasure those first congratulations cards as it gives life to the memory of their little one.

Good gift ideas FOR MUM: nice hand cream, as she will be washing them many times a day while expressing and at the hospital; a small photo album so she can carry photos of her baby with her; something to read (not babyrelated) while she’s expressing. FOR BABY: anything you might normally give a full-term baby (as they will still need it when they get home). There is not a lot of room in the hospital nursery for more than a couple of personal items such as soft toys, so don’t be offended if the parents leave your gift at home. If you’d really like to buy a premsized outfit, try searching online or if you live in New Zealand, try Pumpkin Patch or The Baby Factory – they sell a small number of 000000 and 00000 sized outfits. Outfits should be extremely easy to get into while attached to a monitor. Don’t buy anything with covered feet as the hospital environment is quite warm and the baby may also need a monitor attached to their foot. Generally speaking, the earlier the baby is born, the longer they stay in hospital. Many prems born very early (30 weeks gestation or less) leave hospital near their due date, and may be the size of a regular newborn by that time.

Pre-eclampsia is a condition that occurs only in pregnancy, most commonly antenatally, but can occur up to 2–3 weeks postnatally. Pre-eclampsia may also be referred to as GPH (Gestational Proteinuric Hypertension), PIH (Pregnancy Induced Hypertension) or toxaemia. The exact cause of Pre-eclampsia is unknown but it occurs in approximately 10% of pregnancies. It usually occurs late in pregnancy but may occur as early as 20 weeks. It is more common in women: � having their first baby � having their first baby to a new partner � with a previous history of high blood pressure � with diabetes � having a multiple birth � with a family history of Pre-eclampsia FOR THE FAMILY: A home-cooked meal will be a lifesaver, but also remember that meals do not have to be homemade! A couple would enjoy a takeout meal from the local Chinese restaurant or pizza place just as much as a homemade casserole. Canned soup, frozen pizza and bagged salad are still food! Too much food is a good problem to have! When you bring a meal, also bring paper products like cups, napkins, plates and bowls. Not having to do dishes is a godsend for parents with limited time at home.

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Don’t rush to visit your friends in hospital the first week after the baby is born without checking that they want visitors first. They may be spending a lot of time in the NICU or special care nursery, where visitors other than parents are not really encouraged. Let them know you are happy to meet up when they have time, even if it’s just for a coffee in the hospital cafe, or after they bring their baby home. Don’t even think about visiting if you are unwell – even a common cold can make a premature baby critically ill, and if your friends catch a cold they will be unable to visit their precious little bundle in hospital.

Having to leave your baby in hospital, expressing milk via a pump every three hours, coping with a complete change to your plans for birth – having a premature baby is emotionally and physically exhausting and also very time-consuming, when you can’t just stay home and recover but have to commute to see your baby every day. You can help the family of a new premmie by:

Stay in touch after the first week Do keep in touch via phone, text messages or email, or via someone who is closer to them than you, so that they know you are there and thinking of them as the days or weeks go by – and let them know that you don’t always expect a reply. Your friends may not have a lot of time to spend with you while their baby is in hospital, but it can be a lonely and stressful experience and they will really appreciate that you are thinking of them and have not been forgotten about after the first week has passed.

� Cooking them a meal, either to eat now or put in the freezer – or giving them any vouchers you have for local restaurants. They won’t have much energy for cooking proper meals for themselves. (Also see Bellyful who provide meals for families with newborn babies, and families who are struggling with illness) � Babysitting an older child for a couple of hours a week, maybe in the evening so the parents can go to the hospital together � Taking their dog out for a walk, washing their car or watering their gardens � Helping with their housework or laundry, especially if they have other kids � Asking for a list and doing their grocery shopping

Find out more www.earlybuds.org.nz Early Buds mission is to provide current and useful information, personal stories, product samples, vouchers and products specifically for premature babies and their parents in our “prem packs”. We aim to offer hope, love and support to those families going through the very trying time of adapting to having a new pre-term arrival. You can support Early Buds in many ways, if you are crafty we have a special "create and donate" facebook group (link: https://www.facebook.com/ groups/earlybudscreate/) you may like to join. These wonderful members knit, crochet and sew items for our mums and babies. Or you might

� Giving them a lift to the hospital during the day – it will save them the trouble of having to find parking, and you can have a bit of a chat at the same time � Bring magazines for the parents to read while they are at the hospital � Offer to return phone calls, email photos of the baby and give updates to family, friends and neighbors who may be asking for information Admire their baby photos. When you have the opportunity, ask if you can see photos of the baby, and offer positive comments about them even if they look strange to you. This means a lot to the parents, who already see and love the strength and beauty of their child despite the tubes and wires. Don’t forget the baby shower. If you were planning to hold a baby shower for your friend, go ahead with your plans. A good time to hold it would be a week before the baby is due home from hospital.

like to make a donation of any size through our givealittle page: www.givealittle.co.nz/org/EarlyBudsNZ

Janelle Baine Janelle is the founder of Early Buds. She is mum to Lucas and, more recently, Sophia. Janelle is currently a WAHM as a graphic designer and loving every minute!

48 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years


A SPECIAL FEATURE BY

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More comfort, more milk

How Philips’ range of Comfort breast pumps help mums to be comfortable so their milk flows more easily. There are lots of reasons you might choose to express. Whether you’re going back to work, or Dad wants to lend a hand with feeding, it’s a great way to ensure your baby still gets the benefits of breast milk. A breast pump is one of the easiest ways to express, but it’s important to choose a pump that’s right for you. The new range of Philips AVENT Comfort breast pumps has been developed with more than 25 years’ clinical experience and, more importantly, the advice of many breastfeeding mums. The result is Philips AVENT’s most comfortable breast pumps yet. Because research has shown that being comfortable and relaxed helps your milk flow more easily, which means more milk for your baby naturally. Unlike other pumps, which force you to sit forward to express, these let you sit back comfortably. There’s a soft massage cushion inside the cup which feels warm against your skin for comfortable, gentle stimulation of your milk flow. The pumps also come with our Natural bottle and teat to make it easier for your baby to combine breast and bottle feeding.

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Rosie, Chris and Spencer (5 months) “Being able to express is fantastic. It allows me to get out and have a few hours to myself without having to fret about being back in time for a feed. It’s also nice for my husband to be able to feed our son and experience the bonding times I get on a daily basis. I Logo Specifcations have Babycity been recommending the electric pump to everyone.” - August 2007

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photo competition Be in to win these great prizes! See pages 52–53 for more information.

PLUS The overall winning photo may be used as a cover shot for Kiwiparent


rules & conditions of entry 1. The contest is open to all Kiwiparent magazine and website readers.

7. Only photos with the following file types will be accepted: .jpg, tif, png, pdf, gif.

2. Photos must be submitted to: photo.competition@parentscentre.org.nz

8. Entries for all categories will become the property of Parents Centres New Zealand Inc and PCNZ reserves the right to use any photos for publicity and promotion purposes.

3. Each email must contain only one photo. Any number of photos may be entered. 4. The category must be clearly stated in the subject line of the email and all contact details (name, address, phone number) must be in the body of the email. 5. The name on the file submitted should contain the surname of the person who took the photo (eg smith1.jpg). 6. Photos submitted should be no larger than 1mb. Please advise the file size of the original photo as winning photos may be eligible to be reproduced in the magazine.

9. The judges’ decision will be final and no correspondence will be entered into. 10. Prizes are not exchangeable or transferable for cash. 11. Entries must be received by 4pm on Friday, 3 October 2014. Winners will be notified by email or by phone, and the results of the competition will be published in the December/January issue of Kiwiparent.

Continued overleaf...

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Category 2 Touch perfect We all know how tactile babies and children are, so Bio-Oil would love to see photos that illustrate the importance of touch. Capture that precious moment of connectedness with your child and be in to win one of four fabulous Bio-Oil prize packs. Bio-Oil is a specialist skincare oil that helps improve the appearance of scars, stretch marks and uneven skin tone. It is also effective for aging and dehydrated skin. Each prize pack contains: 1x Bio-Oil Towel

photo competition

1x Bio-Oil Flexible Water Bottle 1x Bio-Oil Mug 1x 60ml bottle of Bio-Oil 1x 200ml bottle Bio-Oil

Prize package worth $100 www.bio-oil.com

Be in to win these great prizes! Category 1 Pregnancy and birth

Category 3 Hooray for play!

Photograph your family’s treasured moments during your pregnancy and in those early months with your precious new baby.

Snap a photo of your child having a blast during playtime and be into win an amazing prize pack of Infantino toys. Get your little one excited about play with the Infantino toy collection! Each toy has been specially designed to engage baby during playtime, using fun characters bright colours and intriguing music. Watch the fun unfold as your baby develops hand eye coordination and fine motorskills! Infantino has created a line of products to help you and your little one laugh, learn and grow.

The winning photo in this category will win a fantastic prize pack from Philps AVENT containing: Philips AVENT Combined Steamer & Blender Philips AVENT VIA Food Storage Set 20pk Philips AVENT Mealtime Set 6m+ Philips AVENT Drinking Cup 12m+ Philips AVENT Spout Cup 200ml, 6m+ Philips AVENT Fork, knife and spoon, 18m+

Prize package worth $397.93 www.philips.co.nz/AVENT

Packed with smarts, full of fun and ready for the daily adventures of parenting. Infantino have created a line of products to help you and your little one laugh, learn and grow! Available exclusively at The Baby Factory – visit one of our 27 stores nation wide or shop online now! Prize package worth $400 www.babyfactory.co.nz

52 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years


Category 4 Water baby

Category 6 Better Together

What little one doesn’t love playing in water? Send us the most gorgeous pic of your baby or child during bath time or enjoying water play and be in to win 1 of 10 Johnson’s® prize packs.

Some things are just better together like sugar and spice (and all things nice!), cheese and crackers, or HUGGIES® Nappies and Baby Wipes. Together HUGGIES® Nappies and Baby Wipes provide a more comfortable clean that gives your baby the best seat all round! Snap up this fantastic HUGGIES® Nappies and Baby Wipes prize pack! Send us a photo that encapsulates why two things are simply better together in your family, like your gorgeous baby and their older sibling or perhaps your cute bub and their favourite toy.

For over 100 years, we've dedicated ourselves to understanding babies and the special nurturing their eyes, skin, and hair require. We use that knowledge to provide mothers with safe, clinically proven mild, and gentle products. JOHNSON’S® baby TOP-TO-TOE™ wash 500mL

The winning photo in this category will win a three-month supply of HUGGIES® Nappies and Baby Wipes.

JOHNSON’S® baby Bubble Bath & Wash 443mL

21 x Huggies Nappies convenience vouchers

JOHNSON’S® baby Shampoo 500mL

2 x Baby Wipes 384 packs

JOHNSON’S® baby Bedtime bath 500mL

1 x Pop Up tub

Each prize includes:

JOHNSON’S® baby Bedtime lotion 200mL.

Prize package worth $400

Each prize worth $41.51 www.babycenter.co.nz/johnsonsbaby

www.huggies.co.nz

Category 5 Sweet dreams

Category 7 Colour crazy kids

Capture your little angel ‘sleeping like a baby’ to be in to win this fabulous pack of sleep solutions from the sleep specialists ‘The Sleep Store’.

Kiwi families love getting out and about with their kids to enjoy our amazing scenery. Send us photos of your colourful children making a vibrant splash on the outdoors and be eligible to win a Phil&teds escape carrier - in limited edition black.

The prize pack includes a cosy sleeping bag made from merino wool and cotton, and two comforters designed to be breathable, soothing and snuggly for baby. It also contains a Zen Swaddle with gently weighted zones designed to mimic being cradled is super relaxing for baby. The useful pop-up blackout blinds help keep the daylight out of baby’s room, and the Happiest Baby DVD has proven tips and techniques that help to calm a crying baby and relax them for better sleep. 1x Woolbabe Duvet Weight Sleeping bag in Toffee Apple 2x Cuski comforters 1x Nested Bean Zen Swaddle

This strong and compact baby carrier has more features than a craggy face! Extra padding and breathability for maximum comfort , while the child harness cradles and secures. There is great storage capacity and a hydration bladder pocket as well as a zip-off day pack. The escape carrier also has a sunhood with removable wind/rain cover. Just perfect for heading out doors! Prize worth $299 www.phil&teds.com

1x SnoozeShade Plus for Buggy 1x Lights Out Pop-up Blinds (2 in a pack) 1x The Happiest Baby DVD

Prize package worth $470 www.sleepstore.co.nz

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Babies grow up so fast that keeping up with the piles of outgrown clothes and toys, can seem like a full-time job in itself. If these unused items are taking over your home – and your sanity – read on, for a way to clear your space and your mind, while helping those in need in your community.

preparing for

parenthood When my first baby was born he started life with lots of lovely clothes and toys. He was a skinny little thing and it seemed hard to believe that he would ever grow into some of the things we had been given. Fast forward three months and that newborn is WAY bigger than he was. He grew in no time and much to my surprise was soon OUT GROWING most of the clothes he had. I stood at his changing table, amazed that his three-month-old clothing already appeared tight! I looked at him and said, “but…but…you only wore this stuff a few times!” Sound familiar? Many new parents know this story, but unfortunately this is not the reality for thousands of New Zealand families. While this is not a new issue, the recent global recession has meant that even more families greet the news of a pregnancy with a mixture of worry as well as joy. Help arrives! In the mid-1970s a group of concerned people saw that there was a need to provide practical support to pregnant women who had little financial or family support, often suffered from society’s judgemental attitudes and were frequently distressed by their pregnancy. They responded by

forming a national social service organisation called Pregnancy Help. Although attitudes these days appear to be more accepting of a range of parenting situations, the need for non-judgemental, practical support and free access to information for mothers/parents and their families, has not changed over the past 38 years. Pregnancy Help is a non-political, non-denominational and nonjudgemental organisation with eight branches throughout New Zealand who help thousands of families annually. We love to connect with parents who have finished with their baby clothes and equipment and pass them on to families who really need them. So what exactly do we do?

We help our clients by � Providing maternity clothing � Providing baby clothing

� Access to information, advice and support on a non-judgemental basis � Offering a friendly listening ear � Arranging for advocacy And all our services are free!

“Great opportunities to help others seldom come, but small ones surround us every day” Sally Koch Some branches also offer the additional services � Pregnancy testing � Childcare

� Loaning a bassinet

� Birthing/parenting support programmes

� Giving them safe and warm baby linen

� Home help

� Referring them to other organisations who can help them � Giving them a crisis contact � Providing a telephone help line

54 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

� Transport Pregnancy Help endeavours to provide support whatever people’s circumstances or needs are. In


addition to basic practical assistance, families often approach us for social support as they are parenting alone, are rurally isolated, or have little or no family/friend support. In other cases, parents may be experiencing problems physically, socially or emotionally during their pregnancy or it may be a partner, family member or friend in need of support. Pregnancy Help works alongside people such as doctors, midwives, Plunket nurses, public hospitals, refugee services, and social workers. The people we help include a growing number of primary caregivers such as single fathers and grandparents, as well as a diverse and ever changing demography including migrants and refugees.

Help us to help other Kiwi families As Pregnancy Help is a charity we rely on donations and volunteers to achieve our vision. We have lots of ways in which you can help us to help other new parents in our community. Here are some ideas:

Call your nearest Pregnancy Help branch and arrange to donate � preloved maternity clothes,

Tell your friends, family and contacts about us, so that anyone who needs our help knows about our service. � Volunteer to help your local branch with anything you enjoy, for example knitting, sewing or helping in the office. � Volunteer to be a member of a Pregnancy Help committee. � Like us on Facebook and keep up with what we are doing.

Joan Hay, Manager, Capability and

Pregnancy Help is conscious of the need for sustainability for families as well as the environment so our services encourage recycling and reuse as much as possible. You can be sure that your donated items will make a REAL difference in the lives of struggling families.

Zealand with Diane Thornton,

Do you need help? If you, or anyone else you know, need help we would love to hear from you!! Look us up on Facebook, call us at your local branch or send us an email. It doesn’t matter what your circumstances are. We will treat you with respect, care and confidentiality, and support you in any way we can. Let’s work together to build a circle of parents who help to ensure that ALL Kiwi babies have the best possible start in life!

� baby clothes, baby bedding � toys � nappies

Find out more

� essential baby items

For more information about

� knitting wool � sewing supplies � fabric.

Pregnancy Help check out our website pregnancyhelp.org.nz or join us on Facebook.

Sandra Scott Mum of two school aged children, Sandra has been involved with Pregnancy Help for the past eight years. She is a member of the National Executive of Pregnancy Help as well as helping to run the Greater Wellington branch. An accountant by trade, Sandra has been CFO in public companies and currently also runs a business with her husband. Sandra is passionate about seeing all Kiwi babies being given a great start in life. Being involved in the work of Pregnancy Help gives Sandra immense satisfaction as she sees the amazing impact it has on the lives of struggling New Zealanders.

Development, Parents Centres New President, Pregnancy Help. The two organisations have a Memorandum of Understanding agreement to help each other support Kiwi families.

Eseta* a mother of 3, was surprised to find herself pregnant at 47! Her hard working husband had ensured that they had provided for their family without assistance for many years, but the unexpected expense of a newborn was just beyond their means. Pregnancy Help gave them the necessary baby clothing and equipment, much to their delight. “Thank you so much, we are so grateful for the help, it has made such a difference in my family’s life!” Rosie* left an abusive relationship when she was five months pregnant. Due to the violence involved it was unsafe for her to retrieve the baby items she had prepared. A friend told her about Pregnancy Help and she approached us for some help. She was provided with the free loan of a bassinet and free baby clothes. “I would have had no other way of providing items and clothing for my baby.it has greatly reduced my stress, at a really difficult time. Thank you so much!” *Names changed to protect identity of clients. Client Permission granted for publication of their stories.

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making pregnancy a little bit easier A recent IBISWorld report found the maternity wear industry shows no signs of slowing down, with a projected annualised growth of 6.2% over the next five years, totaling $178.4 million. Riding this wave, Kiwi clothing company EGG Maternity, a has developed EGG Maternity Concierge – New Zealand’s first to-your-door and online concierge service for pregnant women. The Concierge covers everything a woman might want when she’s pregnant, from personal styling, to exercise programmes, to tips on breastfeeding – all complimentary to EGG customers. “Globally, the maternity wear industry is going from strength to strength, with a forecasted growth of 4.9% this year,” says Charlotte Devereux, CEO and designer of EGG Maternity. “Over the last 13 years,

EGG has gained extensive knowledge on what pregnant women want and we are now pioneering the next big move in maternity – a personal concierge service.” A significant proportion of industry retailers are online-only operators. They have benefitted from the rising popularity of online shopping, however women want to be able to touch and feel the product and feel secure in what they are buying. We saw a real opportunity to offer our customers a bespoke experience to make pregnancy just a little bit easier. The initial to-your-door visits are highly consultative in order to create a beautiful experience for the mother-to-be and help her journey through birth and beyond. EGG has organised an array of options for Concierges to implement into their daily repertoire: from introducing new concepts, products or consulting customers by giving styling

56 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

tips, exercise plans and sharing knowledge about babies, pregnancy and breastfeeding.

How EGG concierges see their role Annetta Lincoln, Southland I loved shopping at EGG in Christchurch when I was pregnant with my son. It was a great and friendly experience and made me feel good within myself at a vulnerable time. I would like to give the same experience that I received to the lovely pregnant ladies, especially first-time mums, of Southland. I am in touch with a great network of women, both pregnant and beyond who I would


love to share experiences, advice and recommendations. Plus have fun and help them feel good about themselves and also look great. No better confidence booster!

Vicki Ingram, Dunedin I am so excited to be joining the team and bringing to life this great concept. I grew up in South Otago and have been in Dunedin for five years. I am mum to Annalise and my ‘day job’ is in accounting. Since having my daughter in 2012 I have developed a passion for all things maternity and baby related and I really hope that I can use this passion to help others. Whether finding the perfect outfit, recommending a great beautician for those rare treats, tips on what to pack in your hospital bag, or anything else, I will do my best to help out. I am really looking forward to working with Mums during this exciting time!

Rebecca Jenkins, Tauranga I really love what EGG maternity and the Concierge service is all about! We want to support women through motherhood as it is such an exciting time. I love the beautiful clothing from EGG that makes women and mums feel fabulous. I moved to the Bay of Plenty 13 years ago and have loved living here and being part of the community. I had my first child in

2012 (a little boy – sigh they grow up so quick) and I learnt so much. My birthing experience was positive and I just love being a mum. If I can help you to find your midwife, doula, or the best massage therapist in town to make your pregnancy a wonderful time, then I will feel that I have achieved my goal in supporting woman through motherhood. www.eggmaternity.com

Danielle Conaghan, Whangarei I am really excited to be a Maternity Concierge. A first-time mum to Oscar and qualified early childhood teacher I currently love being a stay at home mum. During my pregnancy I found a lack of stylish maternity and breast feeding clothes and so jumped at the chance to bring some maternity fashion to the gorgeous mamas of Whangarei. I love that being a Concierge is so much more than providing clothes, although it IS so nice to help mums feel like the gorgeous goddesses they are; it’s also about giving mums the love, attention and support they deserve throughout their pregnancy and beyond. Oscar and I look forward to meeting lots of lovely mums, beautiful babies... and bumps!

By jessica photography.co.nz

Breastfeeding help - by mothers for mothers La Leche League is about helping you understand and respond to the unique needs of your baby, and meeting and being supported by a wonderful network of women. It is about learning to a be a mother and cherishing the mother-baby bond. It is the human touch that no book or clinic can offer.

CONTACT US: E-mail: help@lalecheleague.org.nz www.facebook.com/LLLNZ www.lalecheleague.org.nz


Homeopathic remedies

homeopathy – how it works For most of us, the most difficult thing to grasp about homeopathic medicines is how they can work when they are so diluted. It has always been a challenge to our logical processes to accept a shift away from substance and quantity, to serial dilution and succussion (the vigorous shaking of a diluted homeopathic preparation in order to activate the medicinal substance), in the making of homeopathic medicines. This process results in no measurable substance being left in the preparations above the 12c potency. Orthodox thought pokes fun at the ‘drop in the ocean’ scenario, dismissing this level of dilution as being totally implausible for medicines to be effective. Research over time, however, has proven the effectiveness of diluted medicines along with an extraordinary safety record. Scientifically, it has been more difficult to explain the action of homeopathic remedies. Recently, however, further support for homeopathic medicine has come from a most unlikely direction: the field of toxicology, or the action of poisons. Beginning in 1960, data began to accumulate illustrating that poisonous substances were having two effects on living organisms. At high doses they inhibited metabolism and ultimately caused death, as was well known, but at low doses

they exerted a stimulating effect, a response totally unexpected and not explainable by current medical science. Toxicologists turned to examine the new phenomenon of hormesis, the name given to the stimulatory effect of low levels of usually poisonous substances. Homeopathic dilution and succussion (potentisation as it is called) has not readily fitted into past scientific paradigms. Now, new scientific thinking, including the exploration of nano-particles and quantum medicine, proposes that ‘ultramolecular’ dilution in water is capable of storing information, or energy, relating to a substance with which it has previously been in contact. Water’s amazing property enables it to change its vibrational pattern to the chemical or environment to which it has been exposed. It is, in fact, a chameleon, adapting itself to its environment vibrationally.

The ‘memory’ theory Recent research on hydrogen bonds in water supports this ‘memory’ theory. The Swiss chemist, Louis Rey, found that the structure of hydrogen bonds in homeopathic dilutions of salt solutions is very different from that in pure water. He reached the conclusion that the phenomenon results from the vigorous shaking

of solutions that takes place during homeopathic ‘succussion’. Additionally, using the laboratory technique called spectroscopy, researchers have found that different homeopathic medicines and different dilutions of the same medicine can be distinguished from each other, even though all should contain nothing but water. Japanese scientist, Dr Masuru Emoto, has brought into the mainstream convincing evidence that individual vibration can alter the structure of water. In the simplest of experiments, repeated over many examples, he demonstrates that water has its own unique pattern depending on its source and/or exposure to a range of influences. This is demonstrated by some of the pictures of frozen droplets exposed to music, words and prayers. In the past, the missing part of our understanding has been the concept of "vibrations" and everything that they affect. Nowadays it is generally accepted that everything has a vibration and that for all living creatures, exposure to certain situations, substances and environments can affect or imbalance the body’s vibrations. This is also true when considering aspects of health, even more particularly when considering people in a state of disease. It seems likely that the vibrational state of our body, when stressed or unwell, is expressed


through altered physical symptoms, dysfunction and chemical responses altering the behaviour of the cells and organs. Logically then, the unique vibration of homeopathic medicines must have some effect on an individual’s vibrational patterns when correctly matched. This idea has radical implications for our health as it means that not only do we have to question the water that we drink and the food we eat but also our environment which is saturated with man-made vibrations from electronic devices, chemicals, toxins and artificial substances that we use in our everyday lives. What damage are they in fact doing to our health? It is clear that a diseased individual whose regulatory system has become broken down or blocked, produces symptoms – the body’s indication of impaired function. Homeopaths have long believed that these symptoms are the language exhibited by an inner intelligence within the body which is asking for help to reach homeostasis, or balance. Homeopaths then seek to match these symptoms with a remedy known to cure these symptoms; in homeopathy this remedy is called the simillimum. It seems that the reason this subtle matching process might be so effective is that through matching and prescribing a potentised remedy based on the unique or characteristic symptoms of the individual, the body senses some sort of competition or

interference at a receptor level. As previously mentioned, this response is well known in conventional pharmacology but usually with higher doses of a substance. A similar homeopathic remedy may show an even greater degree of interfering with or even activating the receptors. This will result in inhibitory effects on cells, tissues and organs: a therapy of reactivation or regulation at the gentlest of levels. What is even more remarkable is that, as homeopaths know, the more dilute the substance, the more impact it is likely to have on the organism when correctly matched.

that we need a uniquely tuned remedy to trigger our own healing response?

Work continues on verifying the action of homeopathic remedies on the body and finding ways to show the subtle differences even between two remedies made from the same substance but in differing potencies. We are all individuals reacting uniquely to the myriad of stimulants in an increasingly complex world. Why then should it seem so strange

Growth by Low Levels of Inhibitors. Sci Tot

References 1. Bellavite P, Signorini A. The Emerging Science of Homeopathy, 2e. 2002: North Atlantic, Berkeley. 2. Rey L. Thermoluminescence of ultra-high dilutions of lithium chloride and sodium chloride. Physica A, 2003; 323: 67–74. 3. Rao ML, Roy R, Bell IR, Hoover R. The defining role of structure (including epitaxy) in the plausibility of homeopathy. Homeopathy, 2007; 96: 175–183. 4. Stebbings: Hormesis - The Stimulation of Environ: 22: 213-234 (1982) 5. Emoto water crystals: www.unitedearth.com.au/watercrystals.html 6. Matthew Silverstone, Blinded by science, www.blindedbyscience.co.uk 7. www.marlev.com/HowItWorks.htm 8. http://orthomolecular.org/library/ jom/1997/articles/1997-v12n03-p182. shtmlSmith,

Judy Coldicott RC Hom Judy practices as both a homeopath and reflexologist from Pleasant Point in South Island’s rural heartland. She is a senior staff member for the College of Natural Health and Homeopathy, primarily involved in curriculum matters and student support. Judy’s passion is to make homeopathy user-friendly and accessible to the general public and she loves to inspire people of all ages to feel confident in its use.


money habits set by age seven The famous British documentary Seven Up was based on the premise that children’s behaviours are formed from the age of seven, but it seems financial habits are set by this age also. According to a recent Cambridge University study ‘Habit Formation and Learning in Young Children’, parents and caregivers have a large role to play in modelling good money habits. The study says good habits at home, combined with simple and playful parenting, is required for children to develop good money management skills, which are essential to help them become financially capable adults. Co-author of the study, Dr David Whitebread of Cambridge University, says behavioural habits are largely determined in the first few years of life, and simply imparting information is now recognised as being ineffective in this area. “By contrast, early experiences provided by parents, caregivers, and teachers which support children in learning how to plan ahead, in being reflective in their thinking, and in being able to regulate their emotions can make a huge difference in promoting beneficial financial behaviour,” he said. The study reveals that by the age of seven most children have grasped how to recognise the value of money and to count it out, and by this age they will also have come to understand that money can be exchanged for goods, as well as what it means to earn money and what income is. By this age, most children are capable of complex functions such as planning ahead, delaying a decision and understanding that some choices are irreversible. Children under eight have not yet developed an understanding of the difference between ‘luxuries’ and ‘necessities’.

Tips for parents So if this is the case, what advice is there for parents and caregivers in the first seven years of their children’s development so they can encourage positive money habits for the future? One way is through reinforcing positive saving skills. Many children receive a regular income in the form of pocket money for jobs around the home. Children’s understanding of income is shaped by this practice, but it’s important to also talk about the different amounts that are awarded for different types of work. This raises children’s awareness of earnings. Allowing the child to take on small-scale jobs for pocket money may be a

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method of adults bringing to life for children the concept of earning money. To help children practise waiting until they have saved enough to be able to buy an object of desire, they may benefit from tangible activities such as making a savings chart, indicating how much money has been saved and how much is needed. Shopping experiences help to demonstrate buying decisions. A young child might help their parent compile a shopping list of priority items for the home which helps them understand how to plan and how to avoid overspending. It’s also valuable for children to learn about shopping and comparing item prices with items that are on sale, deciding which size packet to buy, how many packets and how much money to spend in total. These are all important financial lessons that are simple to demonstrate and incredibly valuable for your children in their adult years.

Children’s ages of development for financial learning Age

Financial Skills

2–3 years

Children can distinguish counting words and by four many children are able to express counting concepts, sets, and order of numbers. They also learn that the last number counted is the total in the set.

4–5 years

Children understand they need to pay for merchandise, but may not understand coins have different values. A child can usually understand the concept of ‘equals’ by age five.

5–6 years

Children understand some denominations do not carry enough value to buy some items. It is not until children approach seven years of age that they begin to understand money can be exchanged for goods and that change is returned only when denominations larger than the cost of the item are offered.

6–7 years

By age seven, basic concepts relating broadly to later finance behaviours will typically have developed including counting, and the concept of earning and spending.


Earning and learning app for children A great tool for teaching earning and savings to kids is Westpac's Cash Critter™. This fun, interactive app shows kids how to set goals and save money – and helps to get their chores done! Download the free app for your iPhone, iPad or iPod touch from the App Store or visit www.westpac.co.nz/mobile/cash-critter-app. �

Westpac New Zealand’s free Managing Your Money workshops and online tutorial are here to help you and to help you help your children.

Source: Davidson Institute, an education initiative of Westpac Banking Corporation www.davidsoninstitute.edu.au All opinions, statements and analysis expressed are based on information current at the time of writing from sources which Westpac believes to be authentic and reliable. Westpac issues no invitation to anyone to rely on this material and intends by this statement to exclude liability for any such opinion, statement and analysis. The content of this material is for information purposes only and should not be relied on.

Kari Adams Kari is a part-time working mum to a two-year-old girl with another on the way. As Senior Sustainability Manager at Westpac, Kari is responsible for programmes relating to financial education, social and affordable housing and diversity.

Visit www.westpac.co.nz and click on the ‘Your Money and Tailored Packs’ tab for helpful tools including saving and budgeting calculators and online tutorials. You can also check out if there is a workshop coming up near you. There’s even an online ‘Kids’ space’ seminar that includes some cool online games to get kids thinking about money and how to save. This information is a guide only and doesn’t take into account your personal financial situation or goals.

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Getting back to work? We can help it work for you. Now you can balance your career with your family and help them both grow. We’ve got a variety of exciting career opportunities available, including roles with flexible hours to suit your busy lifestyle. With positions available on a casual, part time or full time basis, there’s sure to be something to suit you. If you have the drive and passion to deliver a great customer experience, and want to join a team of people that are passionate about helping Kiwi’s get ahead, then we want to hear from you.

Interested? Check out westpac.co.nz/careers for all your options.

Westpac New Zealand Limited

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Reader’s birth story

Promoting and celebrating positive birth experiences!

tears are ok

take some time,

By Sharalyn Haddleton

For the most part, our pregnancy was pretty normal and uneventful – on comparing with friends I might even go as far as saying I got off lightly! The one thing that played on my mind a little was regular comments about my small bump. My bump was quite small, but I am not a big person, so this was to be expected. We were tracking to plan and getting the expected amount of growth each week until a midwife visit around 35 weeks when growth had slowed and we were sent for a scan and on to the hospital for closer monitoring. The clinic at the hospital don't allocate appointment times and we lived an hour away, so we got up early and were there when the doors opened, hoping to avoid waiting. We did get in quickly, but spent the day there doing tests and monitoring baby's heart rate and

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Kiwiparent welcomes stories from readers about their births. We recognise every birth is unique and special, and we encourage informed decision-making which empowers parents to make choices that are right for them and their families.

Liz Hibberd, Childbirth Education Manager, Parents Centres New Zealand Inc

Contact the editor with your submission: leighb@e-borne.co.nz

movements. About mid-afternoon the doctor looking after us let us know she wanted to induce us in the next couple of days, but after consultation with her colleagues, decided they would try to get us to 38 weeks to let baby develop as far as he could, with close monitoring. For almost two weeks, we made trips into the hospital every two days – taking a packed bag each visit, in case I had to stay. At the last appointment we had they did a scan. I remember the lovely midwife coming in and saying: "Your baby's tummy hasn't grown in ten days, take some time, tears are OK, the doctor will be in shortly, you won't be going home today" and handing me a box of tissues. I was really scared! What did this mean? And we still hadn't reached 38 weeks. The doctor explained that we were at the point where it would be better for baby to get him out and feed him up. I was to stay overnight and be induced in the morning. I was taken to the ward and given shots of


Photos on this page by Jo Frances photography

steroids to give baby's lungs one last boost. Then I was then taken to the Neonatal Care Unit (NCU) and shown where it was likely my baby would be after I had given birth. We peered through the windows. The rooms were filled with machines and lights and cords and mummies with their babies. It was very emotional and I hoped my little boy wouldn't need to go into the unit. I hardly slept a wink that night, I lay awake, hoping my little man would be OK and thoughts of becoming a mummy the next day! I wrote a long email to my partner Matt telling him what an amazing dad he was going to be. At 8.30 we went through to the delivery suite and the process of inducing me began. We had a monitor on my tummy and once contractions started to get more intense baby's heart rate began to drop. The room filled quickly with people and I was told we could let it happen safely a couple more times, but I was given the option of an emergency C-Section. I wanted to do what was best and safest for my baby, so we took this option. We were signing papers and Matt was getting dressed to go into theatre before we knew it, it all happened so fast. Ethan Anthony Fraser was born by emergency C-Section at 12.33pm, weighing 1,700gm (3lb14oz). My midwife was amazing and did two things that I am so grateful for. She got me skin to skin time in theatre – Ethan was handed to me and put on my chest, he was all arms and legs and looked so long! He was just gorgeous and we were very proud parents. Ethan had stopped growing at 34 weeks, my placenta had stopped doing its job. His heart rate had dropped in labour as the cord was wrapped around his body and was squeezing him with each contraction and he was too little to do anything about it. Ethan was taken straight to NCU. Matt went with him while I finished in theatre. The other thing my midwife

did was make sure she collected some colostrum while I was in recovery and got this to the NCU so it was the first thing to hit Ethan's tummy. I was wheeled to the NCU in a bed on the way back to the ward. Ethan was in a big clear enclosed incubator. He was attached to wires and looked so tiny. I wondered why he was connected to so many wires when they told us he was OK. I just wanted to hold him, but all I could do from my bed was look. Matt split his time between Ethan and me going backward and forward and reporting back to me. He had changed Ethan's first nappy! Later in the evening Matt took me to the unit in a wheelchair. I put my hand through a hole in the incubator and held his little hand. I got to change a nappy – it was pretty tricky through the holes, but we did OK. Then, with help from the team, they manoeuvred wires so I could hold him. He wasn't dressed and felt so fragile, I was nervous I was going to pull something out or hurt him. Ethan's lungs had developed so he didn't need to be on oxygen, we were really lucky! Over the next day the team got us into a great routine – every four hours I would go and take his temperature, clean his face, breastfeed, change his nappy, and have a cuddle.

a setback Unfortunately, on day three, I got an upset tummy. Because the babies in the unit are so vulnerable, I wasn't able to see Ethan. I got put in isolation in my hospital ward in case I was contagious! I stayed in my room, expressing milk. Anyone who came into my room wore masks and gloves and plastic aprons. Matt went and spent all his time with Ethan – delivering milk, having skin to skin time and keeping him company. This went on for 36 hours. All I could think about was tiny little Ethan alone in the unit.

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It turned out my tummy was reacting to the pain relief medication. So, back to visiting! By now he was wearing clothes and had moved into a bed that didn't have a top on it. It made it so much easier to spend time with him!. The unit had a cupboard FULL of baby clothes that had been donated. He wore so many layers it took a couple of trips to the cupboard to get it right the first time! His bed was heated and he had piles of blankets and all his layers of clothes and little hat and booties – he wasn't able to regulate his own temperature. Five days after Ethan was born discussion started about plans for my discharge. I didn't want to leave without Ethan. They had a few rooms at the Unit where mums can stay, but their babies needed to be breastfed. I was religious about being there for every four hourly feed. He was still getting a top up of breast milk after breastfeeding through a feeding tube, but after some discussion I was told that if a room became available I could take it. On the day I was due to be discharged I was given a room! I was so happy! Ethan was moved into the room closest to the entrance – this meant we were getting close to going home! He moved into a bed that wasn't heated and start regulating his own heat. We were given milestones for when we would be able to go home – when he could regulate his own temperature, when he weighed 2kg, when he didn't need the feeding tube. He was doing really well! His lovely four hour routine changed once he moved into this room and I started getting calls in my room through the night to resettle him. The last step before we went home was Ethan's cot was wheeled to my room. I couldn't believe they were going to leave me alone with him! Ethan's routine became three-hourly, by the time I finished feeding and expressing, I had an hour before it started all over again, but he needed to feed often with his tiny little tummy. He also stopped sleeping at night unless I was holding him, which meant I was awake the entire night. The staff reminded me they were there to help and at 3.30am on my second to last night I took up their offer.

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I left Ethan with them and went to have a quick nap. I didn't wake until 6.30am and woke up with a fright. I was out the door, before I was even awake. I walked right past his room and had to double back, then stood beside a cot and put on my hand on the back of the wrong baby, this was a whole new level of tiredness!

Home at last! Finally the day arrived when we were allowed to take Ethan home! We didn't have that long a stay at the unit and I have great admiration for the families whose stays are a lot longer term – I don't know how they do it, I guess because you just have to do what you need to get by. We were sent home with a full calendar of visits from a number of teams to check on Ethan and do weigh-ins daily. I was grateful for this. If things started heading in the wrong direction we would know pretty quickly. So, we packed Ethan into his car seat – propped up with nappies – and we made the journey home! We arrived home to signs and balloons welcoming Ethan to the neighbourhood and deliveries of meals from friends, neighbours and girls from our antenatal class. Over the next couple of weeks, the daily monitoring became less and less and follow-up specialists appointments were cancelled. The team became less interested in us and we knew we were tracking well! Ethan is nearly one year and is hitting all his development targets. He is still on the smaller side for his age, but is just perfect! He is such a happy and relaxed little guy, full of personality and we love him more than we thought possible. Looking back, we are so grateful to our midwife, the staff at the hospital clinic and the NCU. They picked up on things quickly and took all the right actions at just the right times. We were in such good hands, how could the situation have turned out anything other than perfect. �


bite me! Thankfully biting is usually only a phase, but there are some things you can try if your child bites someone.

� copying others

� Be specific when it happens. “Stop biting it hurts.”

� interested in the effect it has on others.

� Watch for signs of frustration and have distractions ready, like singing or going outside.

Guidance or discipline is most effective in a warm and loving relationship where your child feels supported and secure. Children explore and experiment to find out about the world. All their biting, climbing, poking, jumping, touching and questioning helps them to find out about the world. It helps them learn where their boundaries are. You can help them by keeping them safe and giving them new things to learn and explore. This helps them develop the skills and knowledge they will need as adults.

� Watch for signs that things aren’t going well when your child is with other children. � Don’t bite back. That teaches that biting is ok. � Praise your children when they play well with others. � Focus on the child who was bitten, not the biter. � Think about using time out for children over two. Biting is common, so make sure to have lots of safe objects for biting, for example teething rings. Children might be biting because they’re: � exploring things and people

� reacting to sudden change or stress � unaware of the pain it causes

� Give lots of love, warmth and praise. � Communicate. Tell your child what they are doing well, so they develop the confidence to learn new things.

� teething

� Be clear about what you want your child to do and what you don’t want them to do.

� frustrated, excited or angry and don’t have the words to express themselves

� Talk to them when things go wrong. They might need help to work things out.

� wanting attention

� Think about what happened and why. They might be tired, hungry or frustrated and not be able to tell you.

� wanting to control a situation

� responding to another child’s aggressive behaviour

� Think about why they’re refusing to do something. Do they want attention? Are they frustrated? They might just need a hug and some encouragement. � Talk about consequences. For example tell them that if they throw a toy it might break. � If you ask them not to do something and they do, follow through. Ask them to say sorry if they hit someone, or to clean up if they make a mess. � Say sorry yourself. Act as you want your child to act. � Be patient. It takes time for children to develop their own self discipline. � Plan. Put precious things out of reach. Don’t take your child to busy places if they’re tired. Yelling and screaming can make things build into a major battle. Take a deep breath, walk away. Smacking or hitting doesn’t teach children anything, except that hitting is ok. Withholding love tells your child you don’t like them. It’s their behaviour you don’t like. www.skip.org.nz


striving for excellence Earlier this year, twelve ASG Teaching Awards and 13 Cognition Education Leadership Awards were given to teachers and leaders from the early childhood, primary, intermediate and secondary school sectors across the country. The teachers and leaders were nominated by grandparents, parents, guardians, school boards, parent associations and community leaders, for the outstanding work they are doing in their schools. Each demonstrates a wide range of exemplary teaching skills – from helping at-risk kids turn their lives’ around to increasing students’ participation in science by more than 40%. National Excellence in Teaching Awards (NEiTA) Foundation Chief Executive John Velegrinis says: “Today’s recipients are teachers and education leaders of the highest calibre. It is so heartening to meet

teaching professionals who are so committed to bringing out the best in our children academically and socially. “Their record of achievement in going above and beyond to help students reach their full potential is outstanding.” The NEiTA Awards were established by ASG Education Programs New Zealand 18 years ago to promote excellence in teaching. The awards are open to all qualified and registered full-time teachers and school leaders in primary, intermediate and secondary schools, and to qualified and registered early childhood educators. In 2007, ASG joined with Cognition Education Trust to co-sponsor awards for both teachers and educational leaders.

“ASG is passionate about education and the important role teachers play in society.” Chief Executive John Velegrinis (ASG) is a not-for-profit and memberbased organisation, established 40 years ago. It specialises in supporting its members to create educational opportunities for their children. ASG was introduced in New Zealand in 1990. More than 22,500 children are currently enrolled in ASG programs in New Zealand.

Since 1996, more than $185,000 has been distributed to NEiTA Award recipients in grants for professional development, prizes and endowments.

With ASG, members make regular contributions to an education benefit fund that helps to offset education fees and other expenses when they arrive. As a not-for-profit and member-based organisation, benefits are returned to members and their children, rather than shareholders.

The Australian Scholarships Group

WWW.ASG.CO.NZ

The country’s most dedicated teachers were honoured with National Excellence in Teaching Awards by the Minister of Education, Hon. Hekia Parata.

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vulnerable children who most need our care and protection. This package includes funding for free GP visits and free prescriptions for children aged under 13, to extend paid parental leave by an additional four weeks, to increase the parental tax credit from $150 a week to $220 a week, and to help vulnerable children including eight new children’s teams around the country to identify and work with at-risk children and their families. As Education Minister, I have travelled up and down the country visiting schools and meeting parents and families and the message is always the same – we want the best for our children and we want all of them to succeed. By making sure all children get a good education, we know we’re doing the most important thing we can to ensure they get the very best out of life. To ensure our children get the best start, the Government announced a $500 million package as part of Budget 2014, which is focused clearly on young families as well as the

The importance of Early Childhood Education was also reflected in the package with a further funding invested to help ECE centres to remain accessible and affordable, meet demand pressures and increase participation. We know that regular participation in quality early learning significantly increases our children’s chances of future educational success and doing well in life, which is why Government spending on ECE has almost doubled to $1.5 billion in 2013/14. In our schools, we know it’s excellent teaching and leadership that have the greatest effect on the quality

of learning and achievement of our children. Earlier this year, the Prime Minister announced a $359 million investment in career pathways for teachers and principals to lift the quality of learning and student achievement in every school in New Zealand. We want to recognise excellent teachers and principals, keep good teachers in the classroom, share expertise across schools and among teachers, and get our most experienced to the schools that need them most for the benefit of all our children. It’s important that every child leaves school with the skills they need to reach their potential in a modern world. Our continued increasing investment in education will be instrumental in making this a reality for every one of them. We want to make sure that five out of five kids succeed.

Hekia Parata, Education Minister


killer driveways This has been a dreadful year for driveway accidents in New Zealand. Too many families are left grieving for a cherished child killed or injured by a vehicle outside their own home. A two-yearold Paremoremo boy died after being run over by a 1.5 tonne roller in June, just as Kiwiparent was getting ready for print, leaving yet another family numbed by tragedy. According to Safekids Aotearoa five children are killed each year on average after being run over by a vehicle driving on a private driveway in New Zealand, and every two weeks a child is hospitalised after suffering serious injuries in the same way. Children who are most at risk are typically between one and three years of age. The awful reality is that parents and close relatives are most often at the wheel. Driveway run overs can also happen when cars reverse and move forward. “Often the injuries children sustain from run overs are so severe, that they die on the scene. For children that do survive, they frequently have permanent disability or long-term injuries,” explains Ann Weaver, Director of Safekids Aotearoa.

Continued overleaf...

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“If you have small children in the family (specifically one to three year olds), or live in an area with children, it is important for you to know what to look out for. Driveway run overs can be prevented if parents can identify a risky driveway, and follow the key safety messages – check, supervise and separate.” While driveway run overs happen more frequently during spring and summer, it can also easily happen during autumn and winter when it gets dark earlier, so always, always be vigilant no matter what the season or the time of day. There are some key characteristics of risky driveways, so be particularly alert if any of these indicators fit your property: � A long driveway � A driveway in a quiet road or cul-de-sac � A driveway that also provides pedestrian access to the house – there is no separate pedestrian pathway � A driveway leading to lots of parking – cars need to be moved around to make room or allow vehicles to leave


Cameras and reversing sensors Many road safety advocates believe reversing cameras are the most effective way of eliminating the blindspots that often lead to driveway tragedy. A small child may be invisible to the driver of a reversing vehicle, even if the driver looks in all three mirrors – a reversing camera shows the driver what’s behind the vehicle. Recent American research concluded cameras are the most effective technology available at present for preventing collisions when a driver is reversing although it also found that, even with cars fitted with cameras and/or reversing sensors, drivers were still likely to hit an object or person when reversing. As authorities consider making reversing cameras mandatory in some countries, the study found that camera technology can reduce blind spots that lead to the collisions – including driveway incidents – by up to 90 per cent.

� A driveway with no physical barrier – like a fence – between the driveway and outdoor play area.

Check � count the kids before you manoeuvre. Make sure they are belted safely in the car or in a safe place with an adult. � understand how big the blind zones are around your car. Driveway run overs can happen driving forward and reversing. � keep cars locked and don’t let children use driveways as play areas.

Did you know? Nationwide, a child is admitted to hospital every two weeks because of driveway run overs. A further five children are killed annually. Death usually happens at the scene, and children that do survive often have severe permanent disabilities. Driveway run overs are more likely to occur at busy times, when people are going to work, heading out to do the shopping or catching up with family and friends. Most often the driver involved is the father, mother, another family member, a friend or a neighbour.

Separate � consider how to separate children from all areas used for driving. You might need to install a childproof gate at doors or exits that lead to driveways. � infants and toddlers should have safe, fenced play spaces. � if you’re visiting someone’s house, park on the road instead of the driveway. � if you’re expecting visitors, ask them to park on the road or put up a barrier to stop them parking in the drive.

Supervise � Ensure a responsible person (not a group of kids) is actively supervising toddlers and young children.

Find out more www.safekids.org.nz

� late afternoon and early evening are particularly risky times. Special efforts are needed then to make sure children are safe.

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make a monkey out of me! I chose the “monkeys and bananas” theme for my son, Johnny, because his two favourite things at the time were monkeys (of which he has a stuffed toy that he still carries around with him everywhere) and bananas.

Decorating jungle style I tried to keep the colour palette to a minimum and chose to use brown (representing monkeys), yellow (representing bananas) and green (representing the jungle). These colours worked well together as well as on their own for the table cloth, serviettes, straws, cupcake cases, balloons, tissue paper pom poms, ribbon etc. I found monkey themed party hats, cups

70 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years

and plates for each child that worked perfectly with the theme and colours. These were at the entrance to the party so the guests could pick up their set as they entered the party. I also had yellow balloons and yellow gift packs to hand out to each guest. I made brown and yellow tissue paper pom poms to hang over the table, I printed off pictures of monkey’s and stuck them to yellow card which I then used as a bunting. Luckily, I also found large wooden letters to spell my son’s name and painted them yellow then stuck on some stickers of monkeys and bananas. Fortunately, I found the most amazing, perfectly themed bouncy castle to entertain the kids while the adults caught a break and enjoyed some party food.


Feeding little monkeys Thinking of what party food to include was fun as I could easily whip up some healthy options. I provided sliced bananas, kiwifruit and pineapple on a platter as they were all perfectly suited to the yellow and green theme. I also placed whole bananas and fejoas in a fruit stand which looked perfect. I served banana milk in mini milk bottles, and bananas dipped in chocolate on an ice-block stick and sprinkled with yellow sprinkles. I found some peanuts in their shells as these were like “monkey food” and were fun for the kids to open – but always check in case any of your guests has a peanut allergy. I filled up some little transparent plastic cups with yellow jelly to brighten the table. I made banana cupcakes in yellow cupcake cases with chocolate icing and added a monkey topper. I cut up pineapple lumps to show the brown outside and yellow inside, and filled brandy snap cases with custard. To top off the party food, I ordered monkey shaped and decorated biscuits as well as some cute monkey cakepops which were a real hit. For those that needed a break from all the sugar, I also provided some savoury treats – club sandwiches, savouries prepared by my lovely sister, a cheese ball bread dip and yummy homemade pork sausage rolls that my mum made. And an ever popular cheese board as well.

Continued overleaf...

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The cake I hired a teddy bear cake tin and baked a chocolate cake, then cut off the ears and moved them down to where I thought a monkey’s ears should be. I piped chocolate flavoured butter cream icing onto the monkey using different shades of brown (ie some with more cocoa) and tried to make the skin and fur look slightly fluffy by using a star shaped piping tip. As you can see from the photos, everyone had a fantastic time and the main monkey was very happy with his jungle themed birthday!

Kelly Stone Although she has been practicing law for many years, Kelly’s true passions are spending quality time with her three adorable children and photography. She shoots what she loves, capturing those special and unique moments that she sees and feels in her heart. She enjoys learning new skills, appreciates her family, is thankful for her good friends, loves chatting openly and honestly to friends over a good cup of coffee, going for walks, and relaxing on the deck at home watching her children play.

72 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years


winners

Congratulations to the lucky winners From issue 260

Doc McStuffins Set

Isoki Angel Hobo Set

Karen Walker Whangarei

Tina Aarson Auckland

Kathryn Davison Invercargill Liz Yuki Christchurch Geraldine MacGibbon, Wellington Christine Allen, Lower Hutt

Avent Mealtime Sets Katie Barden Ta Atatu Peninsula

Mirinda Halliwell Timaru

Jess Burney, New Plymouth

Caroline Corbie Taupo

Fran Hanse Fielding

Sarah McNutty Auckland

Lois Mallittle Porirua Amanda Brown Auckalnd Phil Emerson Shannon

Britax Carseat Lisa DuPreez Auckland

Laura Davis Auckland Jessica Mooney Wellington Theresa Te Whaiti Hastings

Ever Earth Toys Kay Edwards Rotorua

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Find a Centre near you Parents Centres span the entire country with 50 locations around New Zealand. Contact your local Centre for details of programmes and support available in your area or go to www.parentscentre.org.nz Auckland Region 1 Whangarei Waitemata Bays North Harbour Hibiscus Coast Onewa Auckland Region 2 Auckland East Papakura Manukau Franklin Auckland Region 3 West Auckland Central Auckland East & Bays Waikato Hamilton Cambridge Putaruru Otorohanga Morrinsville Thames–Hauraki Bay of Plenty Tauranga Whakatane Rotorua Taupo Taranaki New Plymouth Stratford South Taranaki East Coast North Island Napier Central Hawkes Bay Central Districts Palmerston North Wairarapa Wellington Kapiti Lower Hutt Mana Upper Hutt Wellington North Wellington South

(09) 438 3003 (09) 446 0959 (09) 4145394 (09) 283 7423 (09) 483 9834

whangarei@parentscentre.org..nz waitemata@parentscentre.org.nz bnhpcpresident@gmail.com hibiscus.coast@parentscentre.org.nz onewa@parentscentre.org.nz

(09) (09) (09) (09)

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admin@hamiltonparents.org.nz cambridge@parentscentre.org.nz putaruru@parentscentre.org.nz samandjulian@ihug.co.nz stimpecat@clear.net.nz thames.hauraki@parentscentre.org.nz

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taurangapc@xtra.co.nz whakatane@parentscentre.org.nz rotorua@parentscentre.org.nz taupoparentscentre@xtra.co.nz

537 297 267 283

577 1229 3071220 345 3111 378 4995

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902 973 237 939 475 380

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South Island

North Island

Northern South Island Nelson Marlborough Greymouth Canterbury Region Ashburton Christchurch Christchurch South Timaru Oamaru Southern Region Alexandra Balclutha Dunedin Gore Invercargill Taieri

0800 1 4 BABY (027) 522 3002 (03) 768 7706

nelson.d@parentscentre.org.nz info@marlboroughparentscentre.co.nz greymouth@parentscentre.org.nz

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308 2570 383 9009 332 5651 6845348 437 2692

(03) 448 8139 (027) 918 7482 (03) 453 5536 (03) 208 7309 (03) 214 7990 (03) 489 3075

alexandra.parents.centre@gmail.com balclutha@parentscentre.org.nz dunedin@parentscentre.org.nz gore@parentscentre.org.nz invercargillparentscentre@gmail.com taieri@parentscentre.org.nz


home and family

baby and child

directory supporting Kiwi parents Baby On The Move Specialists in quality, affordable baby products which you can hire or purchase new. Our qualified team can help you select the correct restraint. Plus if you hire or buy from us we will install your car seat for FREE! Stores nationwide. Phone: 0800 222 966 www.babyonthemove.co.nz

Huggies online pregnancy and parenting The HUGGIES® website is about pregnancy and parenting. Check out features such as special offers, info on sleeping and settling plus hundreds of recipes and kids activity ideas! And it’s all free to HUGGIES® Baby Club members. Phone: 0800 733 703 www.huggies.co.nz

My Food Bag Every week Nadia and her team of Test Chefs dream up exciting and nutritious dinner recipes just for you. We like to keep things simple, so every week (or fortnight) we deliver the ingredients and recipes right to your door. You just open your food bag and discover what tasty meals you get to cook and enjoy. Simple. Healthy. Delicious www.myfoodbag.co.nz

Tommee Tippee Our products have been used by Kiwi parents for over 35 years and we are a market leader in New Zealand. Designed in consultation with experts, the range delivers solutions for each unique stage from newborn to toddler. Phone: 0800 877 876 www.tommeetippee.co.nz

PORSE PORSE believes that living and learning begins at home and that the best foundation for early learning is the provision of a stable and secure environment where children are able to build secure attachment relationships with their individual carers.

Bio–Oil® specialist skincare This specialist skincare product helps improve the appearance of scars, stretch marks and uneven skin tone. It contains PurCellin Oil™, and is it highly effective for other skin concerns, including aging skin and dehydrated skin. Phone: 0800 804 711 www.bio–oil.com

College of Natural Health and Homeopathy We are the leading provider of Homeopathic education, attending and distance, in Australasia. We provide: � A friendly, supportive, integrated learning environment � Flexible learning options (attending or distance) � Highly qualified, professional & experienced tutors � Government approved access to student loans & allowances Our commitment: to providing the highest standard of training in homeopathy.

www.cnhh.ac.nz

home and family

Philips Avent Choosing Philips AVENT means you have the assurance of superior quality products, designed with you and baby’s needs in mind. Interchangeable design features mean products can be adapted to meet baby’s developing needs. Phone: 0800 104 401 www.philips.co.nz/AVENT

ASG ASG is one of the largest specialist education benefit providers across Australia and New Zealand and their sole focus is on supporting children’s education and as a not-for-profit friendly society. It is uniquely different to any bank or any other provider of education savings plan.

www.asg.co.nz www.asg.co.nz/kiwiparent

Phone: 0800 023 456 www.porse.co.nz

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Say Goodbye to Baby Woes!

Changes to the immunisation schedule Pharmac has announced changes to the National Immunisation Schedule to take effect from 1 July 2014. A vaccine for rotavirus has been added to the schedule of universally funded vaccines. Although the infection is rarely fatal, it can be serious, especially in babies. PHARMAC estimates that, nationwide, up to 1200 hospital admissions

Up to 70% of babies suffer the distress of gas and gastric discomfort. Colic Calm is an all natural allergen free homoeopathic formula that provides rapid and effective relief.

per year could be avoided through rotavirus vaccination. The rotavirus vaccine is given while babies are very young – the course of three doses must begin before 15 weeks and finish before eight months of age – and is a liquid oral vaccine that is easy to administer. Varicella (chickenpox) vaccine will be funded to protect children with reduced immune systems (for example,

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because of chemotherapy). It will also be funded for people in direct contact with these children, a practice known as "cocooning". The existing pneumococcal conjugate vaccine, Synflorix, will be replaced by Prevenar 13 for all eligible children. Prevenar 13 offers protection against an additional three strains of invasive pneumococcal bacteria. www.health.govt.nz

Always read the label and use as directed. If symptoms persist see your healthcare professional.

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78 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years


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Let your ideas loose all over your walls with Resene Write-on Wall Paint. Simply apply over your existing light coloured wall paint. Then once dry and cured you can use whiteboard markers to write all over the wall without damaging the surface. And when it’s time to delete an idea just grab a soft cloth or whiteboard eraser, rub out the marker and start again. With Resene Write-on Wall Paint there’s no limit to your ideas.

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win great giveaways

Enter online at kiwiparent.co.nz and follow the instructions. Entries must be received by 5pm 29 August 2014. Winners will be published in issue 262.

Win an Infa Secure Vogue carseat from The Baby Factory worth $599.95

Win 1 of 2 Tommee Tippee® Miomee® Manual Breast pump kits

The perfect harmony of safety and sophistication to complement your car's modern interior, the Infa Secure Luxi Vogue is a premium 0 to 8 years child restraint featuring a narrow designed base with stylish leather-like fabric.

Going back to work? The Miomee® Manual Breast Pump is a comfortable, efficient and portable solution designed to simulate your baby’s natural feeding action. The 3 variable suction settings on the handle allow for a more comfortable and efficient expression. Easy to hold and lightweight to carry, the Miomee® Manual Breast Pump is ideal for use at home and on the go. Includes accessories. Find out more or buy online.

The Luxi Vogue also features a blow moulded, air-filled adjustable headrest, five shoulder slot heights, and nine recline positions, ensuring your child is able to be fitted correctly and comfortably. Exclusive to the Baby Factory, buy in store or online

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3 x $100 gift vouchers from Egg to be won EGG Maternity is an up-to-theminute, dynamic New Zealand company that has been producing stylish maternity clothes and accessories for 13 years, with stores and maternity concierges throughout New Zealand. For the past 10 years EGG has partnered with the Mental Health Foundation to help raise money for awareness in Post Natal Depression. EGG also works with Bellyful who provide meals for families with new-born babies and families who are struggling with illness. www.eggmaternity.com

Win one of two pairs of sheepskin slippers from Canterbury Leather The Mel is our most popular women’s sheepskin slipper that can be used indoors and also for a short trip outdoors. It has a soft PVC sole and a luxurious wool collar that can be worn either up or down – $125. The Moccasin is our classically styled men’s slipper, that is particularly warm, lightweight and durable. It has a cushioned removable insole with roomy toe area. The side stitched durable sole can also be worn outside. This slipper offers excellent value for money at $149. www.shop.canterburyleather.com

RRP $119.95 each

4 thermal food warmers from Avent to be won Warms anywhere, anytime. Easy, safe and effective warming Easy pouring lid Protective lid Warming reference guide Multiple feeds on-the-go without worries. Your food warmer ready in 2.5 minutes! Available from Babycity and other leading retailers. RRP $54.99

80 kiwiparent – supporting kiwi parents through the early years


Perfection like never before deserves protection like never before.

Our revolutionary NEW nappy that actually absorbs runny bowel movements. To help keep precious skin perfect, HUGGIES® Nappies have created the first-ever newborn nappy with a unique 3D UltraAbsorb* layer that absorbs and contains runny bowel movements,

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Scan here for a free sample. huggies.co.nz ® Registered Trademark / *Trademark Kimberly-Clark Worldwide, Inc. © 2013 KCWW. KC1089

Also available in Infant size.



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