Healthy Relationships: Making Sense of Otello

WOAR/SOUNDS OF LEARNING LESSON PLAN Lesson Objective: By the end of the lesson, participants will be able to: • • •

Identify healthy and unhealthy behaviors within a relationship Identify their own values and boundaries within a relationship Understand their peers’ values and boundaries within a relationship

Materials Needed • A list of pre-prepared and cut out statements (Included below) • Statements are to be cut out beforehand and at a font size that students/participants can see from the back of a classroom • Painters’ tape or masking tape

Length 5-10 minutes

Opening Ritual A Relationship Reflection: Write “what comes to mind when you think of a health relationship” on the board and have students spend one minute sharing out as many answers as possible, emphasizing there is not a right answer. After one-minute ends, ask your student what they notice about the list they created? What was that experience like? Actively validate and thank students for their responses throughout exercise.

After sharing subsides write “what comes to mind when you think of an unhealthy relationship?” Have students one minute sharing out as many answers as possible, asking students to share as many examples as they can. After one minute, take a moment with your students to reflect on the second list. Again, ask what do we notice from this list?

How was it to list unhealthy behaviors instead of healthy behaviors? Which list was easier to create? Why do you think that?

Conclude warm up by thanking everyone for sharing knowledge and ask them to keep the lists we built in mind as we get deeper into navigating relationships.

Length 5-10 minutes

Opening Ritual B Relationship Role Play: Set up a “stage” or presentation area in your learning space. Ask two students at a time to strike a pose representing a type of relationship Examples of types of relationship could be: • Parent and child • Friend and Friend • Two people in a new relationship • Owner and Dog • Coach and player • Older sibling and younger sibling • Two people in a relationship where only one is happy Choose from the following debrief questions: “What was it like to strike a pose?” “How did you make decisions?” “What was easy about it?” “What was hard?” “What was it like to see your fellow students strike a pose?” “What did you all notice from this exercise?”

Length 20-25 minutes

Activity Traffic Light Relationships: •

• •

• • • •

Write red light, yellow light, and green light on a chalk/white board. Ask students that if we were talking about types of behaviors in a relationship what type of behavior – good, so-so, or bad – would correspond with each color Pass out slips of paper each with a different action/behavior to each individual student (or table grouping) Ask students to spend the next 2-3 minutes discussing their slip of paper with someone next to them; or if one slip of paper is being shared by a group ask them to talk about it together and decide where it’s going While students are discussing, pre rip small strips of tape so when they finish discussing you are prepared for the next phase of the lesson After 2-3 minutes have passed, ask each group to put their paper in the corresponding color (red, yellow, or green) After each slip of paper is taped to the board, start to debrief Debrief questions and techniques: o How was that? o What about that was hard/easy/in the middle? o After taking a general vibe check of the class start reviewing the Red light/unhealthy behavior section, then move to the yellow, finishing with the green

o o o

o

Spend time on each statement and ask if everyone agrees with its placement and why or why not?

Ask questions about where certain statements would land if it was a friendship and not a romantic relationship Emphasize communication and healthy conflict resolution as extremely important to determining what is healthy and appropriate for each individual relationship, not using wide-sweeping generalizations for all relationships Spend time on placements of paper that seem to bring up emotions for students (track class for side discussions, shifting in body language, outright disagreements with each other)

Phrases: • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Partners spend time with their own friends.

One partner makes all the decisions.

One partner is always late.

One partner is more sexual than they want to be to keep the other partner happy.

Partners are comfortable saying how they feel, even when they are angry or hurt.

One partner pressures the other to smoke or drink.

One partner likes to spend more time together than the other partner does.

One partner likes to flirt.

When angry, one partner gives the other the silent treatment.

One partner constantly says, “I love you.”

One partner hurts the other and then acts like it’s not a big deal.

Partners have friends of any gender.

Both partners feel like they are taken seriously in the relationship.

One partner doesn’t like the way the other dresses.

Partners feel like they can trust each other.

One partner checks up on the other partner at work and/or school.

One partner always thinks the other is cheating.

One partner doesn’t give the other any privacy – reads emails, checks cell phone, shows up at their work.

Anticipated Roadblocks: •

•

Differences of opinion are going to be present throughout the exercise, when that happens ask questions such as “okay we have different opinions in the room, how might two people in a relationship with those opinions resolve that conflict?” (direct communication) Statements are intentionally vague, if you see one that’s not in the area where you think it should/could be as a facilitator ask a follow up question to the group

o

Length 5-10 Minutes

Example: if a student places “One partner constantly says, ‘I love you.’” in green light as a facilitator you can say “okay I see someone puts this in green light, what if their partner doesn’t say it back – what could be going on in the relationship there?”

Closing Ritual Full Exercise Debrief and Closing Out: •

•

Take a few minutes to discuss the whole exercise, questions can include: o How was that exercise? o What about that was hard/easy/in the middle? o How does it feel to see what your fellow classmates think about relationships? o Was anyone surprised by your opinions on the phrases/behaviors? o What did you learn from the exercise?

Closing out: o Wrap up the debrief by inviting students to share one part of relationships they want to pay attention to moving forward ▪ Finish the sentence stem: “In my relationships moving forward, I’m going to pay attention to...”