Is Stephen Ministry Right for Your Congregation & Community?
BY MARLYS CERVANTES
Have you ever thought about how difficult it may be for your pastor to tend to all those suffering fairly long-term needs? Many churches have far more parishioners than their one or two pastors may be able to truly take care of, and with the hardships in the world today the needs of congregants can often overwhelm them. Yet, our greatest treasure by far is our people, God’s people.
One solution many churches nationwide have found is the Stephen Ministry program, which was started in 1975 by a Lutheran minister in St. Louis when he realized he needed help truly meeting the needs of those in his congregation. Dr. Kenneth Haugk, also a clinical psychologist, trained members of his congregation, with a beginning class of nine, to serve as care givers to those in need. This program worked so well locally, it has
grown into a non-profit educational organization that includes thousands of congregations around the world enabling the care for millions of individuals over the years.
The Stephen Ministry program requires its care givers to go through a
and many other life difficulties. They learn how to listen, care, encourage and provide emotional and spiritual support during a time of crisis or other difficult times.
Pastor Leon Veazey at First United Methodist Church, Ponca City, says, “The value of the Stephen Ministry to the pastoral care ministry of the church is immeasurable! The need for empathy, compassionate presence, and just someone to actively listen is far magnified in our culture today than it was even twenty years ago.”
A new group of Stephen ministers prepare for service at First UMC in Ponca City. Submitted photo.
50-hour training with leaders who have been through both that training and one for leaders of the program. The special training prepares care givers to provide one-to-one Christian care to those who are experiencing challenges in life, such as grief, loneliness, divorce, hospitalization, disability, job loss,
Veazey expresses his appreciation for the leadership found at FUMCPC for the Stephen Ministry program. Oftentimes the minister coordinates the program for the church, but he is instead fortunate to serve as the resource when needed for critical care concerns. Otherwise, church members Bill and Pam Elliott are both trained leaders and experienced care givers for the
program at FUMC and were at other churches before moving to Ponca City. “Bill is a Spiritual Director and Pastor, and Pam is a nurturing and empathetic model of what the Stephen Ministry is all about.”
Bill, who has been a Stephen Minister for 11 years and a leader for 9, has been associated with the FUMC program for 9 years. He says there are currently 16 Stephen Ministers who are trained to serve the congregation and/or community. 75% of our care receivers are members of the church. The others are from the community because we want to serve others as well. Some of these are from Hospice and others are mostly referrals from members. Bill met with the local hospice program when it was determined there was a desire for outreach into the community. The director of Hospice was delighted to have several new volunteers who already had 50 hours of training and were interested in serving. The partnership has continued for years now.
“Stephen Ministry is a life-changing experience for both the care receivers and the Stephen Ministers,” says Bill. “We bring the love and compassion of Jesus to the people we serve, and we in turn are enriched and lifted up by the experience.”
Bill’s wife and leadership partner Pam agrees with the importance of the program, saying, “I realized right away how important it is for everyone to have a chance to have someone to walk next to them during a difficult time.” Pam did her initial SM training in New York in 1998 and has always found a church with a program when she’s moved new places, so she’s been at this for 26 years.
As far as for our care receivers, Pam stresses the most important part of the relationship is the trust of confidentiality. “We wouldn’t be able
to walk closely with a care receiver unless they are assured that they can say anything to us and it will not be shared with anyone else,” she explains.
The team of Stephen Ministers meets monthly, continuing to learn more and to support one another. Pam stresses this is important because we “learn to count on each other to be there for us when we are in need of the compassion ourselves.” There is a trust and bonding within this group that is helping others.
Our group at FUMCPC is fortunate to have both Bill and Pam as trained leaders, Pastor Leon if we have more critical concerns, and also other trained counselors within the group who can assist with any referral assistance when needs may require. We are prayerful realists who know when we need to refer someone on to a trained counselor or other agencies for further resources. We also strongly stand by the creed, “We are the Caregiver, and God is the Cure Giver.”
One care receiver gave a note to her care giver at the end of her time of care that read, “Having a friend to talk to every week has meant the world to me. At times, I didn’t think I would make it through, but knowing that I could share whatever I needed to share, made me realize how important it has been to have you in my life.”
There are many times just having someone to listen is critical while other times having someone near is enough without many words at all, experienced care givers emphasize.
Although the most important reason to develop a Stephen Ministry program is the number of people who can be helped, Pastor Veazey expresses another reason this could be good for your church. “In a church where people are trained to only depend on the pastor for pastoral care (all levels), there is a high burnout rate in the pastorate and an anemic pastoral
care program,” Veazey explains. We don’t want to lose our pastors due to unrealistic expectations. I don’t know about your Pastor, dear Reader, but Pastor Veazey will attempt to meet the needs of all of us even to his own detriment, and we simply must do what we can to help meet these needs.
When asked about serving not just our congregation but also our community, Veazey continues, “As far as outreach, I will tell you that more people become part of a church because they feel valued, seen, and heard than any other reason! Stephen Ministry provides people with the ministry of compassion and affirmation outside the walls of the church. When people experience that on their own turf, they may just want to get to know ours a little better.”
If you are interested in finding out more about starting a Stephen Ministry program at your church and would like more information about the logistics of how our church has set up our program, please reach out to the church office or Pastor Veazey (fumcpc.pastor@gmail.com) and you can be put in touch with our leaders. They would be happy to answer any questions you may have.
The most recent group of Stephen Ministers at FUMCPC was confirmed during a worship service on June 23 with a new group of five to join those in the established program. I am one of the five, and proud to be an empathetic listener for those who may be suffering in this challenging world. Happy to maybe take a very small bit of the load off the shoulders of my pastor who does so much for our congregation. Always glad to have another day given by God to possibly ease a burden of someone God puts in my path because it’s been years now since God showed me the margins of my life are to be kept open to really see people…and really listen to them.
Regional Workshops Begin in September
During this year’s annual conference session in May, a Day of Learning introduced conference members to the importance of our work with those experiencing poverty in our communities. As a follow-up to that important event, the conference is sponsoring 6 regional workshops which will focus on emotional poverty as well as introduce ministry action planning.
Over $40,000 in grants will be available early next year to churches who participate in training and make proposals for new or expanded ministries.
Workshops will be held around the state and you can register here. Cost is $15 per person which includes all materials and a meal. Please plan to bring at least two people per church. The schedule is as follows:
Enid (Christ UMC) - Sunday, Sept. 15 from 3 to 7 pm
Tulsa (University UMC) - Sunday, Sept. 22 from 3 to 7 pm
OKC (Lakeside UMC) - Saturday, Oct. 5 from 10 am to 2 pm
Weatherford - Sunday, Oct. 6 from 3 to 7 pm
McAlester (First UMC) - Saturday, Oct. 12 from 10 am to 2 pm
Lawton (Centenary UMC) - Sunday, Oct. 13 from 3 to 7 pm
Content and presentations are the same at all workshops so please pick the one most convenient for your church. And added bonus – Bishop Merrill will be at all events.
Langston University Hosts Back 2 School Bash
BY THE WESLEY FOUNDATION AT LANGSTON UNIVERSITY
On Saturday, August 10, the Wesley Foundation at Langston University hosted its second annual Back 2 School Bash—and it was a huge success! With school starting on August 5, this event came just in time to support students from kindergarten through college, providing a Christ-centered environment filled with joy, service, and celebration.
The Wesley Foundation had the privilege of serving 144 people from both the Langston community and the college campus. The event was packed with exciting activities, including food trucks, inflatables, a DJ providing lively music, and wellness checks for everyone who attended. The highlight for many was our backpack and school supply giveaway, where students of all ages were equipped with the tools they need to thrive this school year.
But the Back 2 School Bash wasn’t just about fun—it was about empowering our community with knowledge and resources. We were honored to host Senator Connie Johnson, who delivered a powerful presentation on voting rights. Senator Johnson’s message resonated deeply with the students and local residents, encouraging active civic engagement and the importance of making our voices heard. Thanks to
her presentation and the on-site voting registration, we were able to register 50 new voters during the event!
At the heart of the Wesley Foundation is our mission, rooted in Matthew 25:31-46, to serve “the least of these.” We are committed to being the hands and feet of Jesus on campus, offering spiritual, physical, and emotional support to our community. Through initiatives like the Back 2 School Bash, we strive to follow Christ’s call to serve all people with love, compassion, and grace.
To continue our work, we invite everyone to get involved and be a part of the Future Vision Campaign, which supports our efforts to serve the students of Langston University. Donations are greatly appreciated
and can be made at www.wflu.net or through Cash App at $LUWesley. Your contributions help fund programs like this and allow us to further the Kingdom of God on campus.
For more updates and ways to be involved, follow us on Instagram and Facebook at Wflangston and on TikTok at Langstonwesley. Together, we can continue to impact lives, serve our community, and share God’s love.
Students at Langston University participated in a Back 2 School Bash hosted by the Wesley Foundation. Submitted photos.
Students enjoyed lunch from
food trucks, wellness checks, a talk from Senator Connie Johnson, and more, at Langston University Wesley Foundation’s Back 2 School Bash.
Meet Your District Administrators
DIANE BULL
north Central District
I am from Ponca City, and that’s where my office is located. I have been with the OKUMC since the District Administrator position was created, so I am starting my 10th year.
As a United Methodist, I heard about the position at church. After retiring from 37 years of high school teaching, I learned very quickly that I was NOT a person who can just sit around. I spent a year teaching at Winfield Correctional Facility for men. I saw this position as a mission, not work, so I was thrilled when I was offered the position.
Mission work is very important to me. It renews my soul! For twelve years I coordinated and was a sponsor for the youth at Ponca City St. Paul’s mission trips to the Appalachian Service Project. Doing missions is my love and I continue it today by going to Mantos Juanos in Mexico and with Lost Creek UMC on their yearly Alaskan mission trip, besides doing various things in my community.
My husband Terry and I have been married for 45 years. Jacob Bull and Brittany Hamlin are our children (that sounds funny because they are adults)! They make us very proud. Our biggest joy are our three grandchildren, Elliott, Annie, and Ryder. We are blessed to have Elliott and Annie live in Ponca City. Ryder lives in Forest Hills, Maryland, so we don’t get to see him as often, but technology makes it better.
I am an outdoor person. I love to garden, work in my flower beds, ride the lawn mower, or work the tractor on our 15 acres.
I truly enjoy what I do in this position. The clergy and laity are the best people! I enjoy all the new friends that I make yearly through working as a District Administrator!
I’m from Walters, Oklahoma, and my office is in the Walters First United Methodist Church. I became a United Methodist almost eight years ago, got involved with what I could, and have never looked back! I am a Certified Lay Servant and have done pulpit fill around the district for several years; I lead our children and youth ministries here at Walters First UMC; and I simply try to stay hooked up with ministry however I can (unless it involves cooking - definitely not my skill set!). I really fell in love with the connectionalism of the UMC, and one day the DA job came open in Lawton and here I am. Fun fact: I have been here two and a half years and had three District Superintendents!
My husband, Dillon, and I have two children, Karter Dillon, nine, and Henley, one and a half. Most of our time is consumed with chasing after them, so life is chaos. We spend a lot of time with friends and family, as we have three nieces & five nephews right here in the area. I like to read and fish; and I absolutely love basketball.
Heather
Brenda Scrivner northeast District
My office is in Claremore, and I’m from Inola. I attend Verdigris UMC and have for the past 33 years. Prior to all that, I was born and raised in and around Houston, Texas. My husband had to come to Texas to find someone worthy to marry. He brought me up here 39 years ago and made me a Methodist.
I was the Lay Member to Annual Conference for Verdigris UMC in 2014 when I heard about the District Administrator job from Brian Bakeman and instantly knew that I wanted this job - a place where I could use my administrative skills in a called type situation.
I have a heart for pastors and felt I could help them keep out of the minutiae of administrative work and let them do what they are called to do, which is preach and lead people to Jesus! I had also seen a lot of laity not treat pastors well.
I felt I could be in a place to influence people to treat their pastors better. It is definitely a calling and a ministry to me. It took the conference another year to get around to hiring me, but I love saying that I was one of the original eight district administrators hired and helped build this position to what it is today. I am actively involved in my church. I serve presently as the Lay Leader. David and I have two adult children, both boys, one 36 and one 33. The younger one is married. We sadly do not have any grandchildren to spoil yet. However, we have a three-year-old Australian shepherd that we rescued at a year old named Ranger that is our baby! Fun fact: I have been a Houston Astros fan since I was a wee one. My Grandfather took me to Astros games all the time and built a love of baseball in me. When I say a fan... I mean a true diehard fanatic! I love to read and watch the sunsets off my back porch.
I grew up in Bethel Acres, just outside of Shawnee. Moved to Colorado for a few years after High School to attend Colorado Mesa University. I am blessed to be married to a beautiful, strong, amazing woman, Audrey. We met in Washington, D.C. in 2012. We moved to the South OKC/Moore Area in 2017 and have been here ever since. I have attended Wickline UMC in Midwest City since I was born. I played Baby Jesus in a living nativity the Christmas after I was borna role they have not asked me to reprise for some reason. I found out about the DA position through my boss/pastor at Wickline, who recommended that I apply for the position.
In my free time I enjoy listening to audiobooks, doing graphic design, playing video games, spending time with my loved ones and friends, and volunteering. I volunteer a lot in my free time in many different ways. One is through a non-profit organization called The Sydney Angle Memorial Foundation, which raises money in memory of a young lady who lost her life in the 2013 tornado in Moore. I also enjoy event planning and am heavily involved in a couple of different comic conventions that raise money for different charities through the year. My favorite verse of the Bible is Psalm 23:4 (KJV). “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.”
Chanel
Burdex
Central District
I grew up in Shawnee and currently reside in Moore. My office is in the OKC ministry center. I’m brand new at this position. Pastor Marcia Martin reached out to her daughter to see if she knew of anyone that would be a good fit for this position. Michelle, Pastor Martin’s daughter and my friend, reached out to me thinking I would be a great fit for this position. I reached out to apply and the rest is history.
I live in Moore with my boyfriend Wes and three kids: Callie, 14, will be a freshman in high school this year. She previously enjoyed pom but has decided to sit it out and focus solely on track. Linden, 13, will be an eighth grader this school year. He loves basketball and giving me gray hairs. He’s the orneriest boy with the biggest heart. Last we have Luca, two. He is everything that we didn’t know we needed. He keeps us all on our toes.
We recently added two five-month-old Brittany spaniels to our household: sisters, Willow and Ivy. I enjoy spending time and making memories with my family both immediate and extended. I LOVE fall, aka college football season, and being outdoors. I am so happy to be here and a part of the Oklahoma Conference family.
EXPERIENCE LIFE AT ITS FINEST, EVERY DAY.
Life at Epworth Villa is all about freedom. Freedom from home maintenance and chores. Freedom from having to drive all over town. Freedom from worrying about future needs. And when you’re free to live your best life, it’s amazing the joy that each day brings. Experience the freedom you deserve and check out our spacious cottages and beautiful apartments at EpworthVilla.org.
Retired Clergy Retreat
How do you spell "RELIEF"? - How about a 24-hour retreat in beautiful Canyon Camp near Hinton OK with friends from across the Conference?
Time for visiting, resting, & relaxing. Friends, fun, campfire, singing, learning.
Cost per person is $123 for a single, or $76.50 for a double (lodge & 2 meals). Contact Brian Bakeman, registrar, at brian405@prodigy.net with questions.
JOIN US SEPT. 30 - OCT. 1
Thomas Hoffman will speak on two topics:
• The 1921 Tulsa Race Massacre
• Pilgrimage to Camino de Santiago (The Way of St. James) in Spain
Call to Action
The Ministry Center will be closed Monday, Sept. 2, in observance of Labor Day. We are grateful for the labor of all who work to keep things running. For Labor Day resources, click here.
Now that school is back in session, consider supporting one of our Wesley Foundations. These campus ministries keep young adults engaged while they’re away at school and provide vital support for students as they live away from home.
Click here to find more information about OKUMC campus ministries.
Share your event or job opportunity in the Contact For consideration, email your listing to editor@okumc.org.