North Devon Hospice Autumn Winter Newsletter 2020

Latest news for supporters and friends of North Devon Hospice

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“The staff at the hospice are going to be there for each individual that loves me. As I pass away, I know the hospice nurses will be there immediately for Rob and Stanley.”

We are still here and we are still caring We are all in this together, now more than ever before.

Throughout this year we have continued to support patients and families.

Families like Lisa’s are being cared for and supported right across North Devon, every single day, on our bedded unit and in their own homes. Our teams remain busy and committed to providing you with the very best care even during these difficult times.

Any donations you’re able to make right now will be invaluable to people like Lisa, Rob and Stanley, as they continue their journey with us. Every penny donated will ensure we can be there for all the family, for as long as is needed, now and into the future.

Thank you. www.northdevonhospice.org.uk

Hello dear supporters, I wanted to start by saying thank you to everyone for all of your support and kind wishes during the last year.

North Devon really is the embodiment of community spirit and we have all definitely felt that here at the hospice.

This year has brought so many ups and downs for everyone and we have experienced those too. The teams have constantly strived to evolve and ensure we are doing everything we can to make sure your care and support is there for you, your family, your neighbours and friends. We couldn’t have done this alone and we are forever grateful for knowing that the community is behind us as we find our way through Covid-19 and beyond.

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As the coronavirus pandemic continues to affect our lives in so many different ways, please feel assured that we are here and we are going to continue to evolve our services to be there for the community, in the heart of the community.

On behalf of everyone at the hospice, thank you and stay safe.

Jo Dedes, Director of Care

If you could benefit from our support or you know of someone who could, please ask your GP for a referral to North Devon Hospice.

Your support helped Andy to die in peace in his own home, surrounded by friends and family When Teresa Lywood’s husband, Andy, was diagnosed with terminal cancer, they were helped throughout by Jill, a Clinical Nurse Specialist from North Devon Hospice, who visited the couple at home in Braunton. Teresa said this support made a huge difference to them both.

“A few years ago I visited my friend who had leukaemia and was in the hospice. It was such an uplifting and lovely place. So when Andy was diagnosed I actually asked for us to be referred to the hospice myself. I knew it’d be invaluable.”

She added, “A lot of people don’t realise that you don’t have to go to the hospice either, you can have the hospice come to you in your home. I didn’t realise quite how much support we’d get until we got it. Jill helped us feel more in control, guiding us and giving us options.”

Jill supported Andy through chemotherapy, helping alleviate his symptoms and allowing Teresa to be a wife instead of a carer. Jill’s support also helped the couple prepare for Andy’s final days, which Teresa describes as ‘almost perfect.’

“It was on a Saturday, and I think he chose that day so his friends could be here. Our closest friends were here and we were chatting, then he just stopped, that’s the only way I can describe it. There was no fuss,

Andy was never one for fuss. Jill’s support meant it was almost a perfect death. That sounds weird, but it’s true. It was calm and peaceful, and that’s all anyone could wish for.”

It could be any of us who needs the hospice in the future, so the more people can help with donations or fundraising the better. It certainly made a difference to us and I know it will for countless other local families going forward.”

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Hospice helps Lisa and her young family with cancer diagnosis Having been diagnosed with breast cancer the day after her 30th birthday, Lisa Wallis and her young family have been through every emotion you could imagine in the last nine years. With the support of North Devon Hospice, she is making the most of each and every day with her husband Rob and their son Stanley. Since her diagnosis, Lisa has also become an inspirational support to others going through the same ordeal. She is sharing her story to raise awareness of the care and support that is available to those facing a life limiting illness.

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“Me and Rob have always lived in the moment and loved spending all our time together,” said Lisa. “We bought a house and I always thought the spare room would be a nursery. When Stanley was born in 2009 we became the Three Musketeers, we could take on anything.”

This familial bliss was thrown in the air when Lisa discovered a lump in her breast. After many tests and painful biopsies, it was confirmed as invasive breast cancer. “When I first heard the news, I felt sick. I felt really angry with my body. Rob had to leave the room, as he said the walls started caving in.”

Lisa had to comprehend losing her breast to a mastectomy aged just 30, as well as subsequent surgeries and dozens of debilitating sessions of chemotherapy and radiotherapy.

Throughout her cancer journey, Lisa has been supported by North Devon Hospice, with both emotional and medical care. “The hospital recognised that I had a little boy, was

newly married, and that I was going to need some support. They phoned the hospice, who kindly took me in and wrapped me up.

They offered me regular counselling sessions, which was a time when I could pour my heart out.”

This support has also been extended to Lisa’s husband, Rob, and son, Stanley. “Rob developed alopecia and lost all his hair. We think that was caused from holding in his emotions for too long. When he started to lose his hair he perhaps realised he needed to talk to somebody. He came to the hospice and started to speak to a counsellor and joined me for the art therapy sessions. Then we introduced Stanley to a counsellor at the hospice, and he’s been supported for over two years now.”

In 2018 it became clear that Lisa’s cancer would not be curable, although treatment could prolong her life for a certain time. She is now supported at home by hospice community nurse Lin Walkey. “She’s a little

ray of sunshine that comes into my life and picks me up when I’m struggling. I didn’t know that I’d be supported by the hospice at home. I didn’t expect the support to start as early as it has.”

Lisa has decided that she would like to be cared for at North Devon Hospice’s Bedded Unit in her final days. “The staff at the hospice are going to be there for each individual that loves me. As I pass away, I know the hospice nurses will be there immediately for Rob and Stanley. When it comes to planning my funeral, the hospice staff will be there too. After that I know Rob will be able to go to regular counselling and the hospice support groups, while Stanley will be able to continue his art sessions at the hospice and will also have a hospice advocate who will speak to the school and help the school support him.”

The Wallis family face an unimaginably tough few months ahead, having dealt with so much already, but their journey has also seen great joy and created memories that will last a lifetime.

“I didn’t know that I’d be supported by the hospice at home. I didn’t expect the support to start as early as it has.”

The family know they can count on North Devon Hospice, who will be there every step of the way, offering support for as long as it’s needed. “We look a day or a week ahead at the moment. It’s about making the most of life and the hospice help us to do that. It’s our haven. It’s our safe place.”

Please help us this Christmas to support families like Lisa, Rob & Stanley, if you can, with a donation.

Thank you. www.northdevonhospice.org.uk 5

‘One Day At A Time’ 2020 has brought many challenges to us all. We know that unity brings support and strength, particularly in difficult times, so we had to find ways of bringing people together in spite of being physically apart.

‘One Day At A Time’ was one way to do just that.

This new area on our website is all about inspiring people to take part in activities that lift the spirits, calm the mind and create a sense of community. Miranda from our counselling team said, “We are hoping that the day we can all be together again is not too far off. In the meantime we want to reach out, connect, come together somehow, despite being physically separated, in the knowledge that we are all human and therefore love being part of something – we like belonging. It’s lovely to think of people doing the activities and being supported by the poetry, readings and mindfulness practices we have put online. Our patients and their 6

Helping the hospice community stay connected families have really embraced it and it continues to bring comfort and support to people which is wonderful to know. The whole counselling team are really invested in making more resources readily available and we’re adding more content for you on a regular basis. Please do let us know if there is anything in particular you would like to have

available to support you or your family.”

These resources are available to all, so please take a look yourself and encourage others to do so too. There is something for everyone.

Take a look at our new resources: northdevonhospice.org.uk/onedayatatime

Mindfulness Mindfulness is about learning to pay affectionate and wise attention to everything you experience in the present moment. Miranda has made a number of guided mindfulness sessions for you to listen to, when the time is right for you.

Mellow moments with Mandy Introducing complementary therapies into your life and daily routine can bring huge benefits to both body and mind.You can access a wide range of tools and resources to support the wellbeing of all the family, from guided self-massage techniques to guided relaxation tracks.

In the making This is all about creating ‘folk’ out of things you have at home. So far we have received hundreds of folk! It’s a simple yet therapeutic exercise which can boost relaxation and inspire creativity.

Between the lines Sometimes it can be difficult to express the emotions we are feeling.

At times like this we can often find others who have expressed it for us, through painting, sculpture, poetry or prose. On this page we add poems or a piece of prose that might express our experience, give us pause for reflection or simply share in how words can bring us together.

Tiggy time Christa, from our Supportive Care team has created videos to send to her grandchildren during times when they are apart. They affectionately call her ‘Tiggy’ and so these videos have come to be known as ‘Tiggy Time.’ Each video introduces children to a different famous piece of artwork. They explore the work and its history, and there is an activity sheet to go with each one.

For now and then Taking time to remember a loved one and how to have a thanksgiving service in memory of them.

At the moment At the moment is an online group for bereaved families in which we use art-based activities and drawing games to have fun, share experiences and offer a space for children and adults to reflect on the events in their family together.

Last year, our intervention saved over 900 hospital admissions which reduced the strain on the NHS and meant people could be cared for in the comfort of their own home.

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The Accord-UK team based in North Devon have ‘kept fit’ to support the hospice 8

Kristine Oberte, Sales Director at Accord-UK

The UK Sales and Marketing Team took part in a virtual fundraising challenge; walking, running, cycling or swimming the distance between all of the Accord-UK sites. This amounts to an astonishing 833.3 miles.

Kristine Oberte, UK Sales Director for Accord-UK said “It is great to see all the teams, far and wide, getting involved in this virtual challenge. With the right mindset and attitude, we can accomplish so much.

It is heart-warming to see such a positive response and willingness from all my colleagues, stepping out of their comfort zones to raise lots of money for the hospice!

I may be slightly biased, but the Accord-UK team is fantastic and I for one was very excited about taking part.”

So far the team has raised over £1,500 and you are still able to donate via the JustGiving page (justgiving.com/fundraising/aukchallenge).

Accord-UK have been long-standing partners of the hospice for 20 years now and Claire Paine, hospice Business Relationship Manager said, “We are so grateful to the team at Accord-UK for taking on such an incredible challenge and thinking of our patients and their families during this time. The support that Accord-UK provided over the years has ensured that our patients and their families have received the love, care and support they so desperately need. We’re proud to call Accord-UK our partners and thank them for all the support they continue to give.”

Our business Christmas e-card will warm hearts Season’s Greetings 8

Instead of sending cards this year, we have chosen to support local patients and their families with a donation to

This year we are doing things a little bit differently. For a small donation your business can send our first ever Christmas e-card, in lieu of sending posted cards. By taking part all of the money raised will help

to support local people like Lisa, Steve and Teresa who are featured in this newsletter.

If any local businesses would like to take part please contact Claire by email clairepaine@northdevonhospice.org.uk.

Hospice volunteers given highest honour from the Queen has not been supported by a volunteer, throughout our 36-year history of caring for local people. In so doing, each and every one of them are making an impact on someone’s life at a time when they need all the support they can get. I could not think of a more fitting way for this impact to be recognised.”

The entire body of volunteers at the hospice have been given the royal seal of approval for their incredible contribution to the community, having been awarded the Queen’s Award for Voluntary Service. The award is the highest honour for volunteer groups and is equivalent to an MBE. It recognises outstanding achievement by groups of volunteers who regularly devote their time to improving quality of life in their community.

Chief Executive, Stephen said, “I am bursting with pride that the volunteers have been recognised in this way. There’s not a single part of hospice life that

The honour comes at a time when so many of our volunteers are itching to return to their duties. Sue from the volunteer team said that it has been heart-warming to keep in touch with the volunteers throughout the restrictions of 2020, to hear how eager they are to return. “We’ve been so grateful that some of our volunteers have been able to continue their duties in the last few months such as our gardening crew and our volunteer counsellors who have been able to provide support to local people over the phone. But of course, for safety reasons many volunteer roles are unable to be carried out right now. We hope that

changes soon, because it is a sign of their incredible commitment to the hospice.

This is why our team of volunteers fully deserve to be honoured in this way.”

Stephen said that volunteers will be vital in helping the hospice recover in the future.

“Our volunteers help out in literally every facet of hospice life, so it is a struggle to operate without so many of them right now. For example, a huge number help out with our fundraising activities and in our charity shops, all of which have suffered. It will take a monumental effort from across the community for us to come out the other side of this, but I am so encouraged by the fact we have one of the best volunteer teams in the country to help that happen. Each volunteer cares so deeply for the patients and families we support. That is why they have been honoured in such a way, and that is why I know they will do everything they can to help the hospice pull through.”

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Max from Braunton inspires people across the world Max’s camping adventure has turned into a worldwide phenomenon with many hailing him the Captain Tom of his generation.

Max said, “My friend Rick gave me his tent before he died and made me promise to have an adventure, so that’s what I’m doing.” Max decided to camp in his back garden during lockdown to raise money for the hospice, a charity close to his heart. “I am raising money for North Devon Hospice because they looked after our friend and enabled him to pass peacefully at home with those closest to him, which was his final wish.”

Max has been interviewed by Sky News, BBC News, CBS America, This Morning, Good Morning Britain, Jeremy Vine and the list goes on. Even TV personality Chris Evans donated £700 during their live radio interview to help Max get to his personal target of £10,000.

At the time of writing Max has raised an incredible £100,000.

We wanted to take this opportunity to 10

say; Max, Rick would be so proud of you and everything you’ve done. What an inspiration you are.You’ve been a ray of light during a difficult time. The money you’ve raised is going to help us care for hundreds of local people. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts for making a difference in your community and inspiring people across the world.

“My friend Rick gave me his tent before he died and made me promise to have an adventure, so that’s what I’m doing.”

MAX

NEWS IN BRIEF Hospice shops reopen and start to receive donations

More emotional support and care being provided via phone calls and on Zoom, meaning patients and families do not need to travel to access support

Resources for you and your family are now available on our website… find out about the best bereavement books for children, how to plan ahead and techniques for managing anxiety

impressive £2,000 this summer in memory of her gran Eileen who was cared for by the hospice. She took on the Exmoor Extreme challenge where she walked a staggering 52km, tackled countless hills on an incredibly hot day, took in some of the most amazing scenery… and got a well-deserved ice cream on route.

Well done Sarah!

All large hospice fundraising events cancelled out of concerns for the community’s safety but supporters are encouraged to keep supporting us from home

Community fundraising helps with loss of income Like many charities and businesses, we have lost vital income. Fundraising in the community has continued to help us and also inspire us. Sarah raised an

“It’s been 10 years since she died. I will always support the hospice because they helped us over those 18 months and made a difference to how she felt about things. The hospice nurses were amazing.”

A family member

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Thank you for your support

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Thanks to the Pynes Walk community who have raised over £4,000 during lockdown phenomenal!

Glenn Jones took the plunge from 15,000ft, in memory of his mum. Thank you for raising over £1,500.

Even our vegetables know the value of a hospice hug! This mummy and baby carrot were grown in the hospice gardens.

Simon cycled for 26 hours straight covering 655km in the 2.6 challenge and raised £2,000!

Thanks to everyone who has been making face coverings and selling in the community including Jenny and Everything Westward and Sara, Rose and Maria from Fremington.

Huge thanks to Ella’s Kitchen for their donation, after the support provided to Becky, who works for the company, when her mum passed away.

Thanks to the inspirational Jenny who did the Hospice Hair Raiser and shaved her head.

Thanks to Ryan, aged 10, and his family business Aramis Rugby for selling rainbow shirts, balls and masks. Get yours here www.aramisrugby.co.uk/charity

We are delighted to be working in partnership once again with Perrigo. The company has provided a huge support to the hospice for 20 years, from taking part in our fundraising events and challenges, to volunteering, providing financial support and so much more. Throughout the pandemic the team have been eager to find out how the hospice has been impacted and understand how they can help. They have gone above and beyond to deliver precious PPE and employees from across the business have been undertaking fundraising challenges to help support the vital care provided to local patients and families during these difficult times. Most recently, the company donated £5,000 to ensure our vital care and support can continue. We are so grateful for this latest donation. Claire from the fundraising team said, “To have such dedicated business partners means the world to us. Perrigo are making a huge difference to the local families we are caring for right now. Whilst our partnership may look a little different than we anticipated at the beginning of the year, we’ve found new ways of working together. We would like to thank all staff and the Perrigo Foundation for their generous support.”

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Remember us in your will Please think of leaving a donation to North Devon Hospice in your will. Gifts left in people’s wills account for one third of the care provided to local patients and families. This is a way to ensure that those facing the end of their life, or the loss of a loved one, do not have to face it alone.

Gifts of any size make a real difference, as they help secure the future of hospice care in North Devon. It’s kind gifts like these that help to fund the care that we provide to North Devon.

For more information about how to leave a gift in your will, please contact Ali on 01271 347206 or email leaveagift@northdevonhospice.org.uk.

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Steve advocates for being supported

Steve shares his story about the value of talking and reaching out for support when you need it.

“In September 2017 an acute oncology nurse sat me down and TOLD me to get help. If I didn’t, I would not be able to care for my wife who was battling terminal breast cancer. I was not coping well mentally. In the past I could solve everything but I couldn’t solve cancer and I couldn’t get it clear in my head that I couldn’t make it better. Once I called for help, I was referred to the North Devon Hospice care team and I started on my support/coun-

selling journey. On the 12 Aug this year and after nearly 3 years I finished my last counselling session. From the bottom of my heart I would like to thank the whole team.

You will never know how much you’ve helped me and family. Friends Forever. I called for help and you were there.”

Although Steve’s journey of support with the hospice has now come to an end, he doesn’t want it to finish just yet. “I want to come back to volunteer, I will sweep the floors, meet people, I will do whatever I can to be part of what is happening at the hospice because it matters to people like me and I want to help in whatever way I can.”

A £25 donation pays for a child to access bereavement support. We are supporting a number of children right now and helping them to cope with losing their parent.

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Remember loved ones with our new Light Up A Life Tree of Remembrance.

Christmas can be a really special time, however this year may be especially hard for some of us who are unable to get together as we would do normally. We understand how difficult this may be for you right now and so we hope you will join us to honour the memory of those loved ones who are no longer with us during this poignant time.

st our lso reque You can a ife ht Up A L annual Lig s to ay w r more Leaflet fo ll a c s, support u 4248 01271 34 website r u o or visit

This year, as it will be difficult for you to view our Books of Remembrance at the hospice, we have created an online Tree of Remembrance where you will be able to view your loved ones name at any time, from the comfort of your own home.

Our Tree of Remembrance allows you to gift a star on our tree to honour their memory, you will be able to include a message for them and a photo if you would like. We encourage you to share this with your friends and family so they may be part of the Light Up A Life online experience with you - they will also be able to make a donation to your star, should they wish to.

We hope this goes some way to bringing you and your family a sense of comfort at this time.

North Devon Hospice, Deer Park, Barnstaple, EX32 0HU

01271 344248 northdevonhospice.org.uk

Registered charity number 286554