Nifty pickle 12 25 14 by James Webster

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Thursday • December 25, 2014 • Issue #18

Riding in Luxury By Elsa Rutherford

“I always wanted to drive luxury vehicles,” says Ruben Barahona. “I was a truck driver, but one day a limousine company hired me to drive for them and I worked my way up from driving the smallest vehicle to the largest.” Barahona tells me this in English with only a slight Spanish accent as we sit in my office and chat. His striking good looks, dark hair and eyes and over 6 foot tall frame make this well-dressed man very noticeable. His gracious manner and ready smile make him easily approachable. Ruben was born in Guatemala but is a legal resident of Marshall County. He lives in Horton with his wife, Elva, and daughters, Jocelyn and Jennifer. Ruben owns a local limousine company, called Diamond Limousines located in Albertville, but the limousines are available for other areas of Marshall County also. You may see one of his limousines parked adjacent to Mattress King in Guntersville. He has many more available through his affiliation with other nearby limousine owners. These limousines include the following: Lincoln—seats 10 to 12, Excursion SUV— seats 12 to 14, Denali—seats 14, Chrysler 300—seats 8, and a Hummer—seats 14. So it is easy to choose the limousine best suited to your needs. Ruben tells me that all types of people lease limousines for all types of reasons.

Not just for proms, weddings or the holiday season, as you would expect. He says, “people lease limousines year round for party-going, a dinner and night on the town, for family reunions, and many other occasions, including simply for the fun, pleasure and romance of being chauffeur driven in a luxury limousine.” I ask him if his passengers ever want to bring him into their conversations. He says, “Sometimes they do. But usually, especially the younger passengers, they want their privacy and want to listen to their music, so I just raise the glass divider between them and me, and they can’t hear me and I can’t hear them.” The cost of the transportation depends on the size of limousine, the length of time it’s used and if any special accommodations are needed. For example, Ruben will take photos and videos if the client requests it. Limousines are often reserved months ahead to be sure they will be available when the client needs them. Ruben tells me he is already taking reservations for prom season in the spring. Speaking with Ruben, I have learned the limousine rental business is much more bustling and in much more demand year round than I realized. Like many of our charitable citizens, Ruben likes to contribute to the community in any way he can. Presently, he is sponsor-

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New & Exciting Changes Coming To The Nifty Pickle in 2015 By James Webster, Editor-In-Chief

First of all, you may have noticed our new logo at the top of the page. I decided it was time for a fresh look, so I hired a 3D Illustrator in New York by the name of Matt Ostrom to design the new pickle. Personally, I think he did a fantastic job. Wait until you see some of the other variations that we are coming up with. This is going to be super-fun! There is something else that has to be done as well. Our new pickle needs a name and that’s where you come in. If you will notice, we have a form at the bottom of this page, inviting you to Name That Pickle. Simply complete the form, mail it to us or send your suggestions via eMail. All of the information that you will need is on that form. I’m really looking forward to seeing what you come up with. Oh, and I almost forgot to tell you this... The winner of the Name That Pickle contest will receive a gift card with a value of up to $25. We will make an announcement later concerning where the gift cards can be redeemed. You have until January 15, 2015 to submit your entry for the Name That Pickle contest. Now, let’s talk about what’s going on for the next few weeks. As you may know, I have been diagnosed with end-stage renal failure which means that my kidneys no longer work properly. I have been on Dialysis for about 18 months now and unless I get a kidney transplant, I will be on it for the rest of my life. From my experi-

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Trusting the OIG The snafu in Phoenix, with its claims that 40 veterans died because of scheduling problems, got our attention. What has us perking up our ears now is the allegation that the Office of the Inspector General for the Department of Veterans Affairs hid or buried information that it had for years about the Phoenix scheduling mess. Over the years, I’ve read a few hundred reports out of the OIG. I’ve seen the care and effort that go into every investigation, as well as the subsequent recommendations that show complete understanding of the facts at hand. In the details, I can see the OIG ferreting out information in paperwork and interviews, digging deep. If the OIG has fallen down in any area, it is in being too trusting in its recommendations -- trusting that those at the top in any VA facility will work to make changes based on those recommendations. It’s only on the next inspection go-round that the OIG discovers that its recommendations often were ignored. There needs to be an intermediary level of accountability to stick around and crack the whip while the OIG goes on to other investigations. Between April and September 2014, the VAOIG produced: eight national health-care reviews, 25 hotline health-care inspections, 27 CAP (Combined Assessment Program) reviews and 34 Community Based Outpatient Clinic reviews. They opened 41 investigations into the diversion of controlled substances, four for health benefits fraud, 53 for criminal activity -- and much, much more in the form of audits, evaluations and assessments. The math shows that the OIG saved $1.59 billion in total dollar impact. If you want to take a close look at the new report, go online to va.gov/oig and click on publications. Look for Semiannual Report to Congress (April to September 2014). Freddy Groves regrets that he cannot personally answer reader questions, but will incorporate them into his column whenever possible. Send email to columnreply2@gmail.com. (c) 2014 King Features Synd., Inc.

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Q: Two of my favorite shows, “Scandal” and “How to Get Away with Murder,” haven’t been on for weeks. What’s going on, and when will they be back? -- Frankie F. A: Don’t worry, the hit ABC dramas are merely on winter hiatus. Olivia and Annalise will be back on Jan. 29, at 9 p.m. ET and 10 p.m. ET, respectively. “Murder” has its two-hour season finale on Feb. 26, with the 11-episode “American Crime” taking its time slot starting March 5.

“American Crime” -- which stars Felicity Huffman, Timothy Hutton and Penelope Ann Miller -- tells the story of a young couple in Modesto, California, who are brutally attacked in their home, leaving Matt Skokie, a war vet, murdered, and his wife, Gwen, unconscious, barely hanging on. The crime sends shock waves throughout the community, stirring up tensions across socioeconomic and racial lines in this gritty new drama told from the points of view of all involved. Another new ABC drama, premiering Sunday, March 1, is the 10-episode “Secrets and Lies.” The story focuses on Ben, played by Ryan Phillipe, who is a person of interest in the death of a neighborhood boy, which is being investigated by Det. Andrea Cornell, played by Juliette Lewis. *** Q: I remember reading here that there was supposed to be another “Jurassic Park” movie, but I haven’t heard anything about it recently. Is that still happening? -- Paula F. A: It is indeed happening. “Jurassic World” -- the fourth movie in the sci-fi dinosaur anthology -- will make its world premiere on June 12, 2015. The new film takes place 22 years after the first movie, on the island of Isla Nublar, where the dinosaur park Jurassic World has reopened for business with a fully functioning dinosaur theme park. The movie stars Chris Pratt and Bryce Dallas Howard as staff members at the park. Attendance has been in decline for years, and an idea to put the place back on the theme-park map -- genetically modifying and creating an entirely new dinosaur -- massively backfires. *** Q: I know season four just ended, but I have to know: Will my favorite show, “Hell on Wheels,” be back for another season? -- Jane T. A: The AMC Western period drama, which is about the construction of the first transcontinental railroad across the United States, will be back for its fifth and final season of 14 episodes, which will be split in half for its airing. The first seven episodes will premiere in summer 2015, with the final seven airing summer 2016. *** READERS: I reported a few months ago that NBC was developing a family sitcom starring Bill Cosby that was to possibly debut this summer. Well, in the midst of multiple rape allegations, the network has decided to pull the project, which was going to be a multigenerational family show with Bill as the patriarch, dispensing wisdom on relationships and parenthood.

It’s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas. **********

James Webster Publisher/Editor-In-Chief Elsa Rutherford Editor/Contributor/Published Author

The 4 stages of life: 1. You believe in Santa Claus 2. You don’t believe in Santa Claus 3. You dress up as Santa Claus 4. You look like Santa Claus

Ruben Barahona Hispanic Editor/Interpreter

What do you call an elf that sings? ELFIS

The publisher, Nifty Pickle, Inc., has no responsibility for claims made by advertisers. No part of this publication may be reproduced in whole or in part without consent of the publisher. The Publisher will not be liable for any error in display advertisement to a greater extent that the cost of the line space occupied in the advertisement. The advertiser and/or agency agree to protect, indemnify and hold harmless this publication, and it’s publisher, Nifty Pickle, against any and all liability, loss and expense (including attorney fees) arising out of the publication of the advertisers advertisement.

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A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.

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Just heard that in 2015 there will be a new device that can turn thoughts into speech. I have had that for years, it’s called alcohol.

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My New Years Resolution is to break my New Years Resolutions....That way I succeed at something!

T.C. McKinney Production Specialist Nessa McKinney Design & Layout Trish Webster Office Manager

Letter To The Editor:

We encourage letters to the editor but we ask that certain guidelines be followed: Letters may be typed or handwritten, and legible. Letters must be signed along with a telephone number and address. Phone numbers and addresses will only be used for verification and will NOT be published. Letters should not exceed 250 words. The Nifty Pickle reserves the right to refuse to print or, at it’s discretion, may edit any letter. The basic content of the letter will not be altered. All letters must be received by Monday at Noon and should be sent to Nifty Pickle • 7032 US Hwy 431, Albertville AL 35950 or emailed to editor@niftypickle.com.

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The United States of Amnesia

Remember the Occupy movement, with all the encampments across the nation, populated by citizens taking on the 1 percent? At best, we have a vague recollection of them and their noble cause, which was to shame the country into doing something about the toxic inequality of our wealth. We took notice for a while, then lost interest as the media switched to others stories du jour. It wasn’t long before the authorities were able to sweep away their protest with nary a squeak in return from any of us, while also brushing off any hope for reform. Let’s set aside for a moment the argument over whether the violence in and around Ferguson, Missouri, and disruptions around the country have any justification. Another question is, Will they accomplish anything, or will the questions about police brutality -- particularly toward minorities -- be shoved out of the public’s consciousness by the next Malaysian Airlines, single-minded, simple-minded coverage. The shooting death of black teenager Michael Brown at the hands of a white cop, Darren Wilson, who admits he suffers no pangs of conscience, and the subsequent grand jury absurdity, which resulted in no indictment, has forced us to focus once again in this country on trigger-happy cops and anger from people of color about prejudiced mistreatment by the authorities. As always, the victims of the destruction in and around Ferguson are largely innocent bystanders. But in a larger sense, our society is victimized. The justified disgust at the thuggish destruction and dangerous behavior of a few troublemakers obscures the equally justified outrage at a law-enforcement system that is turning us into a heavily armored police state. Instead of “serve and protect,” for too many out-of-control officers, the watchwords are “intimidate and suppress.” We can’t go on like this, not if we want to maintain a system that relies on the consent of the governed. If too many citizens conclude that they are being mistreated, they will withdraw their consent. We all have a stake in preventing that from happening. But even with the violence, the obvious needs for reform probably won’t be addressed. Soon Ferguson and the larger problem it represents will fade from memory, leaving just more residue of the distrust that defines our lives these days. What can we trust? Equal protection under the law? Few believe in that any more than they accept the concept of fair economic opportunity in the United States. Can we bank on our public officials representing our interests? Certainly not when our political election system is so totally under the control of the big-moneyed few. Our education system is a mess; so is health care, and efforts to improve them are met with implacable resistance. How about in the private sector? Can we rely on products we buy to be what we’re told they are? Of course not. Meanwhile, we deteriorate. Those on the right blame the president; those on the left blame the unyielding opposition. Both are correct, but let’s face it: The blame is really on all of us. By refusing to stick with demands for needed change, we’re giving up on our country. (c) 2014 Bob Franken Distributed by King Features Synd.

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ALBERTVILLE

s Albertville Baptist Church t 302 Buchanan Road , Albertville, Alabama 35950 e (256) 878-3933 t t Corbinville Methodist Church Hwy 75 N t Albertville, Alabama f

e d y y s -

Corinth Baptist Church 4183 Rose Road Albertville, Alabama 35951 (256) 894-3400

Boaz Church of God 115 McGee Street Boaz, Alabama 35957 (256) 593-3689 Crestview Church of Christ 2001 US Hwy 431 Boaz, Alabama 35957 (256) 593-7326 First Baptist Church 225 S. Main Street Boaz, Alabama 35957 (256) 593-8580 Mt. Zion Baptist Church 623 County Road 2 Boaz, Alabama 35957 (256) 561-3682

Albertville, Alabama 35950 (256) 878-2291

Sardis Baptist Church 1501 Church Street Boaz, Alabama 35957 (256) 593-7762

r Mt. Calvary Baptist Church 201 Rose Road e Albertville, Alabama 35950 (256) 878-6685 d e Rose Road Church of God

s r . t e

BOAZ

Fairview United Methodist Church 1750 Hustleville Road Albertville, Alabama 35950 (256) 891-1719

t s , n First Baptist Church Albertville 309 East Main Street -

804 Rose Road Albertville, Alabama 35950 256-891-7723

Solid Rock Church 2073 Section Line Road Albertville, Alabama 35950 256-891-1818 The Potter’s House

GUNTERSVILLE

Church of the Living God 1621 Henry Street Guntersville, Alabama 35976 (256) 293-9658 / (256) 960-4351 First Baptist Church 1000 Gunter Ave Guntersville, Alabama 35976 (256) 582-5141 First United Methodist Church 539 Gunter Avenue Guntersville, Alabama 35976 (256) 582-2001 Guntersville Church of Christ 800 Gunter Avenue Guntersville, ---Alabama 35976 (256) 582-2494

210 Sand Mt Dr. c Albertville, AL 35950 256-298-2378 l Union Grove #1 d Missionary Baptist Church s t 1189 Rice Mill Chavers Road t Albertville, Alabama 35951

Mount Zion Missionary Baptist 1444 Carlisle Ave Guntersville, Alabama 35976 (256) 582-0181

e BOAZ h All Saints’ Anglican Church 706 North Main Street y Boaz, Alabama 35957 p

Rocky Branch Free Holiness Church Rocky Branch Drive Guntersville, Alabama 35976

(256) 891-0500

Belaire Baptist Church 1505 Oak Drive Boaz, Alabama 35957 (256) 593-8773 Beulah Baptist Church 1991 Beulah Road Boaz, Alabama 35957 256-878-1516

The Church at Lake Guntersville 4525 Wyeth Drive Guntersville, Alabama 35976 (256) 582-5312 Victory Baptist Church 1644 O’ Brig Avenue Guntersville, Alabama 35976 (256) 582-5054

When you are making you resolutions for the upcoming New Year, instead of focusing on what you aren’t, look more to what He is. Our perspective changes everything. The moon will fit between your fingertips if you hold them just right. Your focus determines your direction. That is why God desires our worship, not because He is vainglorious. Certainly not because He “needs” it, He isn’t lacking anything. He desires our worship because He wants us to be like Him. Have you ever had a friend that said a certain phrase or had a tone in their voice that after a while you began to copy without even realizing? It is especially noticeable, and sometimes annoying, in young children. You may have even told them, “You sound just like so and so.” That is usually the way it works, the more time we are around someone the more we act like them. When we place our focus on God, we begin to act and think like Him. This year, instead of trying to grit your teeth and push away the plate or throw away the cigarette just relax and look at Jesus. If we focus on what we have in Him the other junk just drops to the wayside without hardly any effort on our part. The Bible says “that law stirs up the desire to sin.” The best way I can translate that into something we understand is a wet paint sign. I would have never thought of touching that till you put up the “Do Not Touch” sign then it’s all I can think about. Another example is if you want to eat the bark off a tree, then declare a fast, or go on a “diet”. Tell yourself you can’t have food and it’s all you think about. The purpose of the law is to show us we need a savior, we are guilty. The “law” brings shame, and shame empowers the very addiction we are trying to stop. This year instead of looking at all the negatives in your life, focus on the positives that came “In Christ”. Know that He loves you 100% just like you are bumps, bruises, blemishes and all. He is neither disappointed nor ashamed in you. Don’t worry so much about your weight or your habits and just worship. Seriously, just worship. See yourself as you would Christ. The Bible says “we are hid in Him.” If He is righteous, holy and acceptable to God, so are you, because you are in Christ. Your arm is no less a part of you than your head. You stand before God not because you are so great but because Jesus is. God is not mad, disappointed or ashamed of you because you are in Jesus and He is not mad at Jesus. The Bible says, “Awake to righteousness and sin not.” When we realize who we are, we stop being who we aren’t.

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Directorio de Iglesia Iglesia de cristo Palabra Miel 9820 US Hwy 431 Albertville, AL 35950 256-226-5545 (Pastor Dante)

Hacer publicidad de su Iglesia, llamada a Ruben (256) 829-8537

Chistes Español

El doctor llama por teléfono a su paciente: The doctor calls his patient by telephone: Vera, tengo una noticia buena y otra mala. “Vera, I have good news and bad news.” - Bueno... dígame primero la buena. “Well then, . . . tell me the good news first.” Los resultados del análisis indican que le quedan 24 horas de vida. “The results of the analysis indicate that you have 24 hours left to live.” Pero, bueno, ¿eso es la buena noticia? ¿Entonces cuál es la mala? “Well, that’s the good news? Then what’s the bad news?” Que llevo intentando localizarle desde ayer. “That I have been trying to reach you since yesterday.” *********************** Doctor, doctor, no puedo recordar nada. “Doctor, doctor, I can’t remember anything.” Vaya, y desde cuando tiene usted este problema? “Wow, and how long have you had this problem?” ¿Qué problema? “What problem?”

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La ciudadanía despúes de los 70 años: Fue más fácil de lo que pensé

DALLAS -- No fue, hasta cierto punto, un inicio azaroso el que vivió Claudia Jovel al llegar a suelo estadounidense hace aproximadamente 20 años proveniente de El Salvador, ya que lo hizo contando con una tarjeta que la certificaba como residente de este país. Su hermana, una ciudadana estadounidense, se ocupó de asegurar el futuro de toda su familia una vez que obtuvo su nacionalidad al procurarle documentación a cada uno. “Mi hermana Sandra nos pidió a todos cuando se hizo ciudadana. Eso me benefició mucho porque pude venirme con mis hijos, quienes ahora ya tienen sus propias vidas y son profesionales exitosos”, contó la señora Jovel. Lo curioso es que, tal como otros inmigrantes con residencia legal en este país, Jovel no había hecho antes su solicitud para obtener la ciudadanía a pesar de cumplir con todos los requisitos desde hace mucho. “Yo renové mi tarjeta en dos ocasiones, no tenía prisa para hacerme ciudadana. Además no hablo inglés y tampoco tenía el dinero”, explica Jovel, quien vive en Grand Prairie. Fue el rumor acerca de la posibilidad de cambios en la forma N-400, la cual se usa para solicitar la ciudadanía, lo que la hizo cambiar de parecer. Jovel sometió la aplicación para hacerse ciudadana en abril de este año y en octubre 11 ya estaba frente a un oficial de inmigración haciendo su entrevista. Ahora, tras pasar todos sus exámenes, la salvadoreña está solo a la espera de su ceremonia de juramentación. “Fue mucho más fácil de lo que pensé. Ahora me siento como si me hubiera quitado una piedra de entre los pies. Me siento muy contenta y feliz porque siento que alancé una meta muy importante a pesar de mis 74 años de edad”, expresa. Jovel cuenta que su jornada no fue tan pesada como creía. “Fui a un taller de Proyecto Inmigrante, ahí me llenaron la papelería,” dijo. El taller, parte de la campaña nacional New Americans Campaign, les ayuda a inmigrantes como Jovel para solicitar la ciudadanía. “Y me ayudaron a aplicar por la ayuda federal que le dan a personas de bajos recursos y así no tuve siquiera que pagar los $680 dólares que cuesta el trámite”, admite muy contenta. Jovel habla de la forma I-912 Fee Waiver (Exoneración de pago), la ayuda que el gobierno ha otorgado por años a personas que no pueden cubrir los gastos de sus trámites de inmigración. Al respecto, Douglas Interiano, director ejecutivo de Proyec-

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to Inmigrante ICS, Inc., explica que esta ayuda federal no todos la aprovechan. “Algunos de los solicitantes ni siquiera saben que existe, otros no la piden porque creen que no se las van a dar. Pero la verdad es que si llenas los requisitos y demuestras que no tienes trabajo y que tus ingresos son bajos, con toda seguridad te exoneran la cuota de $680 dólares”, asegura Interiano. Agregó que, inluso, si en la actualidad la persona que quiere aplicar para la exoneración está recibiendo algún tipo de ayuda como WIC o estampillas, la posibilidad de ser exento del pago es mayor. Así como Jovel, hay millones de residentes permanentes calificados para someter la planilla N-400, pero no lo hacen. La mayoría de éstos, según un estudio realizado por el Centro Nacional de Investigaciones PEW en febrero del 2014, son mexicanos. Según el informe, los mexicanos son la minoría mayoritaria dentro de los Estados Unidos, esto incluye a inmigrantes indocumentados y residentes legales. Sin embargo, de los aptos para solicitar la ciudadanía, solo un 36 por ciento lo hace, el resto se excusa aludiendo desconocimiento del idioma, falta de interés y falta de dinero. Los mexicanos se colocan así, muy por debajo de otros grupos latinos, 61 por ciento, que sí solicitan la naturalización en cuanto pueden. Interiano está de acuerdo con las estadísticas. “A muchos los detiene el idioma, a otros el dinero, mientras que otros siguen soñando con regresar algún día a su país y prefieren seguir siendo sólo residentes permanentes. Lo que ellos no entienden es que están perdiendo la oportunidad de votar y recibir otros beneficios que sólo los ciudadanos obtienen”, recalcó. La buena noticia para Jovel es que, a sus 74 años, ya no tendrá que preocuparse en renovar su tarjeta de residente, tampoco se afanará al pensar que tendrá una entrevista con agentes de inmigración; al contrario, vivirá mucho más tranquila y disfrutando de los beneficios que este país ofrece. “Una de las primeras cosas que pienso hacer después de la juramentación, es pedir mi pasaporte para poder votar”, concluyó la salvadoreña de la tercera edad. Para mayor información sobre las planillas N-400 y I-912, o sobre los requisitos exigidos para dar comienzo a una solicitud de ciudadanía, visite: www.uscis.gov. Esta historia es parte de una serie especial de New America Media sobre nuevos ciudadanos estadounidenses de la New Americans Campaign. Para más información sobre cómo puede hacerse ciudadano, ingrese a www.newamericanscampaign.org.

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ARIES (March 21 to April 19) Your love of the holidays creates a special bond between you and the people in your life. Use this as a way of building stronger relationships that will carry over well beyond this time. TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) A new approach could go a long way toward resolving a painful estrangement, especially at this holiday time. And since your aspects favor friendship this week, why not go ahead and try it?

LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) Good news about a loved one makes the holidays even more festive. Expect some unexpected gifts, so be prepared with a few nicely wrapped packages of goodies to offer in return. SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) The holiday season provides an opportunity to meet new people, some of whom you might even consider “worthy” enough to join the Scorpio’s select group of friends.

GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) Your positives continue to dominate, and any negative factors that squeeze in can be dealt with easily. The secret is to tackle them at once and not allow them to benefit by your neglect.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) You always bring your own wonderful sparkle and light to the holidays, and don’t be surprised if this year someone special reaches out to respond to your warmth in kind.

CANCER (June 21 to July 22) Good news: A colleague’s remarks could help you move toward ultimately resolving that persistent workplace situation. Meanwhile, enjoy the holidays with loved ones.

CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) Togetherness is the dominant theme for the Goat’s holiday celebrations this year. That means reaching out to bring everyone you care for into your very own special circle of light.

LEO (July 23 to August 22) No one reflects the bright holiday more than all you Leos and Leonas who love the shimmer and glimmer of the season. P.S.: There just might be a very special something from Santa.

AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) A reminder of a very special moment from the past makes the holidays more memorable for the romantic Aquarian. New friendships hold the promise of a romantic future VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) Cele- as well. brate the holidays by being more receptive to new experiences. Overriding the Virgo PISCES (February 19 to March 20) Getreluctance to try new things could be the ting into the swim of things for all you parbest gift you’ve given yourself in a long ty-loving Pisceans is easy enough this holiwhile. day season. And, of course, you can expect to impress people wherever you go. BORN THIS WEEK: You are respected for your honesty and loyalty. You make friends slowly -- but with rare exceptions, they’re in your life forever. (c) 2014 King Features Synd., Inc.

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Q: What do you get from sitting on the ice too long? A: Polaroids! ***************** As a little girl climbed onto Santa’s lap, Santa asked the usual, “And what would you like for Christmas?” The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a minute, then gasped, “Didn’t you get my E-mail?” ***************** Q: Why do seals swim in salt water? A: Because pepper water makes them sneeze!

d a y

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Pumpkin Patch Bars If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not already part of a cookie trade, why not start one this year -- with healthier cookies and bars? Get two or three friends together, each bring two different kinds of cookies or bars, and then you all go home with six different kinds. Ingredients 1 (15-ounce) can solid packed pumpkin 1/2 cup unsweetened applesauce 1/4 cup water 1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon reduced-calorie margarine 2 eggs or equivalent in egg substitute 1 3/4 cups reduced-fat biscuit baking mix 2 teaspoons baking powder 1 1/2 teaspoons pumpkin pie spice Sugar substitute to equal 3/4 cup sugar 1/2 cup chopped walnuts 3/4 cup raisins Directions 1. Preheat oven to 350 F. Spray a 9-by-13-inch cake pan with butter-flavored cooking spray. 2. In a large bowl, combine pumpkin, applesauce, water, margarine and eggs. Add baking mix, baking powder, pumpkin pie spice and sugar substitute. Mix well to combine. Stir in walnuts and raisins. Pour batter into prepared cake pan. 3. Bake for 45 minutes or until a toothpick inserted near center comes out clean. Place cake pan on a wire rack and allow to cool completely. Makes 12 (2 bars each) servings. â&#x20AC;˘ Each serving equals: 161 calories, 5g fat, 4g protein, 25g carb., 133mg sodium, 23g fiber; Diabetic Exchanges: 1 Starch, 1 Fruit, 1/2 Fat. (c) 2014 King Features Synd., Inc.

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Riding in Luxury

Continued from Page 1

ing a free-ride giveaway simply by registering at Food Value in Douglas, Guelaguetza Bakery and Novedadas la Reyna, both in Albertville. For other locations to register, phone: Diamond Limousines at 256-8298537. There will be a drawing for a winner every 2 weeks. If you have a special need for a limousine, such as to give a home-bound citizen an opportunity to take a ride in style, please call Ruben at the above number for a free ride. (Whether your special need qualifies for a free ride will be determined by Mr. Barahona when you speak to him. But donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be shy to call; Mr. Barahona is a very kind and empathetic man.) One other thing I should mention is that Mr. Barahona has recently been assisting us at the Nifty Pickle as our Spanish interpreter and Editor of the Hispanic section of the paper. We are grateful for his help and grateful to be working with such a fine, congenial man. Remember to call Diamond Limousines at 256-829-8537.

Watch for the Brand New Issue of the Nifty Pickle coming in late January!

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New & Exciting Changes Coming To The Nifty Pickle in 2015

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ence so far, being on Dialysis is tolerable but certainly no fun. However, taking my treatments three times a week is far better than the alternative. And in case you didn’t know about the kidneys, without Dialysis, you can’t live without them. On January 9, 2015, I will be going to Nashville, Tennessee and spending the day at Vanderbilt University Medical Center to be evaluated for a transplant. They want to be sure that I’m not dying from something else before they agree to put me on the transplant list. It’s my understanding that there are well over 100,000 people currently on the list so it will most likely take years to actually get a new kidney. I’m keeping a positive attitude about it, regardless of how it goes. I really appreciate the support and encouragement that I have received from all of my family, friends and readers of the Nifty Pickle. It means a lot and knowing that you really do care will help me through it all, whatever the outcome. Now, let’s get back to the Nifty Pickle and briefly talk about what’s going on with that. Of course, I mentioned earlier that we had a new logo and we are running a contest to Name That Pickle. I believe we will have a lot of fun with that so please enter the contest and you may come out the big winner. Because of everything that is going on with my health, I have decided to postpone printing the Nifty Pickle for about 3 to 4 weeks. This will give me time to get all of the testing done that is required by Vanderbilt. Also, this will give me time to make a few changes (improvements) to the Nifty Pickle. We started with the new logo but I have several other ideas that I would like to implement that will make the Nifty Pickle a much better publication. I also have plans to revamp the website, www.niftypickle.com, as well as our Facebook page and other social media avenues. Once again, I appreciate the support and kind words from our readers and advertisers concerning the Nifty Pickle. I am excited about what the New Year will bring for all of us. If you have any suggestions, questions or concerns about the Nifty Pickle, please don’t hesitate to get in touch. Happy New Year!

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Campfire Beer Pancakes

CREEL AND POSSESSION LIMITS AND SIZE LIMITS Detailed information on creel and possession limits and size limits is provided. Please familiarize yourself thoroughly with this information. You should also notice that size limits for the various fish species are not the same on all public waters. Be sure and check this information for each body of water you plan to fish. Should you have questions, you may contact any Wildlife & Freshwater Fisheries Division Fisheries Biologist or Conservation Enforcement Officer or call (334) 242-3471 for assistance. USE OF BREAM FOR BAIT All species of bream may be used as bait as long as a person does not have in his possession total bream numbers in excess of the daily creel limit, regardless of size, and they are harvested legally. Other na tive game fish may not be used for bait. SALE OF GAME FISH It is unlawful to sell or purchase any game fish from Alabama or in Alabama from another state except (1) game fish raised in hatcheries and sold for stocking ponds and lakes; (2) non-native game fish (trout, salmon, etc.) raised for human consumption or (3) largemouth bass, shellcracker, yellow perch and bluegill bream raised in farm ponds, which may be sold under permit from the Wildlife & Freshwater Fisheries Division. Contact your local District Office.

When youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re roughing it in the great outdoors, a hearty breakfast is in order. We turn to the classics: pancakes, bacon, and eggs, cooked in a cast iron skillet over an open fire. Ingredients

3 1/3 cups CHOW All-Purpose Baking Mix 1/2 cup toasted pine nuts 1/2 cup currants 2 cups beer (any pale lager such as Corona, Budweiser, or Heineken) 2 large eggs 1/4 cup vegetable oil, plus more for cooking Butter and maple syrup, for serving

TROTLINES It is illegal to (1) fish trotline or snag line within 25 feet of the bank unless the end of line is tied or anchored with at least six feet of 100 percent cotton line (untreated), and (2) fish a trotline, snag line, set line, commercial fishing net, slat boxes or wire baskets within one-half mile below any lock, dam or powerhouse. Nonresidents fishing trotlines are Directions 1. Combine baking mix, nuts, and currants in a large bowl and limited to 100 hooks total.

mix until evenly combined. Make a well in the center of the dry ingredients and add the beer, eggs, and vegetable oil. Stir dry ingre WIRE BASKETS Wire baskets may be used only in certain counties to harvest dients into wet ingredients until just moistened. (Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t overmix or nongame fish for personal consumption only. Persons holding a com- the pancakes will be tough. The batter should be lumpy.) mercial fishing license may not fish with wire baskets. No fish taken in wire baskets may be sold or offered for sale. All game fish taken in the baskets must be immediately returned to the water. All baskets must be clearly marked with the valid wire basket license number and name of person using and owning the basket. It is illegal for any one person to fish with more than four wire baskets. Consult the Wildlife & Freshwater Fisheries Regulation Book or local Conservation Enforcement Officer to determine number of baskets and locations where wire baskets are legal.

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2. Heat a cast iron skillet over medium heat on a camping stove or over a campfire fitted with a grilling grate. Test to see if the pan is hot enough by sprinkling a couple of drops of cold water in it: If the water bounces and sputters, the pan is ready to use; if it evaporates instantly, the pan is too hot.

3. Add 1 tablespoon oil to the pan and swirl to coat. Ladle about 1/4 cup batter into the pan for each pancake. (You should be able to fit 3 to 4 pancakes at a time.) Cook until pancakes rise slightly and form lots of bubbles on top, about 3 to 4 minutes. Flip and cook on the other side until bottoms are golden brown, about another minute.

4. Repeat with remaining batter, adding 1 tablespoon oil between batches if the pan seems dry. Serve immediately with butter and maple syrup.

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Gifts for Seniors Who Have Everything

Seniors have acquired so much “stuff” over the years that we have nearly everything we need ... and more. If you’ve held off buying a gift for a senior in your life because you don’t know what to get someone who already has everything, here are a few gift ideas that would be most welcome. • Coupons for cab rides, or gift certificates for restaurant meals, laundry services, auto detailing, spa day or hair salon services. • Gift basket created especially for your seniors, such as gourmet food, cheese, jams or chocolate. Or consider a subscription to a quarterly or monthly gift club. Options range from fruit baskets or flowers to bacon, coffee and cigars. • Pay for a year of cable TV, the daily newspaper, magazine subscription or Netflix. •T wo tickets to a play or other event where you’ll accompany your senior, or a pair of movie passes so your senior can take a friend. • Pay for a senior’s lifelong learning class, either at the senior center or nearby university, and arrange for transportation. • Put together a box of useful things, like stamps, note cards, address labels, batteries, razor blades and calendar with large print. Include a list of important phone numbers printed out in a large font that can be taped to the inside of a cupboard door. (Keep the file and make changes whenever your senior needs to update it.) • Make single serving meals for the freezer. • Don’t leave out your own participation and that of your children. A small coupon book full of services you can do year round, such as cleaning, painting a room, weeding the garden, raking leaves and checking expiration dates on food in the cupboard all will be appreciated. What do seniors really want most? The gift of your time. Matilda Charles regrets that she cannot personally answer reader questions, but will incorporate them into her column whenever possible. Send email to columnreply2@gmail.com. (c) 2014 King Features Synd., Inc.

Pitted Nails Reveal Psoriatic Arthritis

sore in the middle. He insists that it is almost gone. I am afraid that it is skin cancer, very serious and that it needs to be checked out by a dermatologist. How do I get him to go? -- P.K.F.

ANSWER: Please tell him that I think it sounds like it might be skin cancer, such as a squamous cell carcinoma, and that he should DEAR DR. ROACH: I am a 77-year- see a dermatologist immediately. Some peoold male. I had to stop playing golf about two ple have an immense capacity for convincing years ago due to joint pain. I had psoriasis from themselves that nothing is wrong. The sooner age 15 until I was 40. I am retired from the he gets an evaluation, the better. Navy and had to be hospitalized twice during *** my time in service due to my skin. Why it dis- DEAR DR. ROACH: I am a veteran appeared at age 40, I don’t know. Is it possible and have had digestive problems (GERD and that I could have psoriatic arthritis? One doctor gastritis) since I came back from Vietnam in I saw said that I had to have psoriasis in order to 1968. How closely related are these disorders? get it. I saw that you said that sometimes the ar- -- J.R.O. thritis shows up before the skin lesions. Can it show up after you have quit having the lesions? ANSWER: GERD (gastroesophageal -- Anon. reflux disease) is very, very common, and refers to the passage of food and acid backward - ANSWER: Indeed, psoriatic arthritis from the stomach into the esophagus. The gencan show up years after psoriasis starts and eral cause of GERD is a relative weakness in when there are no skin lesions. Often, pits in the lower esophageal sphincter, the muscular, the nails or other nail changes are seen in those valvelike structure at the bottom of the esophwith psoriatic arthritis. agus. Gastritis is an inflammation of the lining However, having psoriasis doesn’t protect you of the stomach. from other types of arthritis, such as osteoar- Both of these terms often are used imthritis or rheumatoid arthritis. Since psoriatic precisely, as a guess at what might be causing arthritis is so destructive, you should see an ex- nonspecific stomach pains. With such a propert, perhaps a rheumatologist. longed course, it would be wise to make sure The arthritis booklet discusses rheuma- of your diagnosis, as your symptoms actually toid ar thritis, osteoarthritis and lupus. Readers might be caused a different condition, such as can order a copy by writing: Dr. Roach -- No. an ulcer or infection by the bacteria H. pylori, 301W, Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475. which would require different treatment. Enclose a check or money order (no cash) for *** $4.75 U.S./$6 Canada with the recipient’s print- Dr. Roach regrets that he is unable to answer ed name and address. Please allow four weeks individual letters, but will i n c o r p o r a t e for delivery. them in the column whenever possible. Readers *** may email questions to ToYourGoodHealth@ DEAR DR. ROACH: About 10 months med.cornell.edu. To view and order health ago, my husband noticed a small “bleb” on the pamphlets, visit www.rbmamall.com, or write skin near his right hip area. He used “tag away” to P.O. Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475 and alcohol swabs daily; however, the area is (c) 2014 North America Synd., Inc. All Rights a giant 2-inch-diameter “blotch” with an open Reserved

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Have mercy upon me, O LORD; for I am weak: O LORD, heal me; for my bones are vexed. Psalms 6:2 I have set the LORD always before me: because he is at my right hand, I shall not be moved. Psalms 16:8 Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoiceth: my flesh also shall rest in hope. Psalms 16:9 For thou wilt not leave my soul in hell; neither wilt thou suffer thine Holy One to see corruption. Psalms 16:10

Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fulness of joy; at thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore. Psalms 16:11

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Wordsearch Contest

Win a $50 Gift Card... Find the Advertisers listed below and tell us which page

that their ad was found. Mail this entire page to us at PO Box 1161 â&#x20AC;˘ Guntersville, Alabama 35976. Deadline is January 5, 2015. (Date of Puzzle: December 25, 2014)

Find these names: alabamacraftshow alanjackson bottomlinewebdesign brigittesclothing custompestcontrol fullcolorprinting incarerx joespawnshop mcclendonauctionhouse mcclendonwholesale nickkirstjd qslowsmoked rigginsunlockservice tradebank wlcaccounting

HOW TO PLAY: On this entry form you will find some of the businesses advertised in this issue. Simply browse the Nifty Pickle, looking for these advertisements. When you find them, record the page number on which you found their advertisement in the space provided on this entry form. Then, find and circle that business name in the word search puzzle. Once you have located all of the advertisers listed, complete the entry form and mail this entire page to the address shown above. Your entry must be received by January 5, 2015. We will then draw one entry from the group of correct entry forms and announce that winner in the January 22nd issue. Incorrect or incomplete entry forms will be disqualified. All decisions by Nifty Pickle, Inc. are final. There will be only one winner for this contest each week. GOOD LUCK!

Page Numbers: __________ __________ __________ __________ __________ __________ __________ __________ __________ __________ __________ __________ __________ __________ __________

The Winner of the December 4, 2014 Wordsearch Puzzle Contest is A. Gillian of Albertville. Congratulations!

Name: ________________________ Address: ________________________ City, State, Zip ________________________ Telephone: ________________________ Email Address: ________________________

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Who Wants To Tell About Their Favorite Pet?

Would you like to see your pet featured in the Nifty Pickle? Jot down some information about your pet (name, personality, something funny, tricks it can do, etc.) and send it along with a photo to Nifty Pickle Pet Pix, PO Box 1161 Guntersville, Alabama 35976, email to info@niftypickle.com or bring it by the office at 7032 US Hwy 431 in Albertville (next to Merle Norman).

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ACCOUNTING, PAYROLL, CONSULTING, BOOKKEEPING and Much More. Call James at WLC ACCOUNTING 256-6738190. 7032 US Hwy 431 in Albertville... 3 Doors Down from The Nifty Pickle Variety Store.

Q SLOW SMOKED BBQ 106 South Main Street in Old Downtown Boaz. If you love BBQ, then you will love REAL Q-slowsmoked with natural hardwoods. 256-281-9699. See our ad and coupon in this issue.

ALABAMA CRAFT SHOW Selling Year Around Crafts handmade by local artists. Custom orders welcome. Piper Station, Boaz. 256-996-4945.

TRADEBANK The Smarter Way To Barter®.Save Cash on Business and Personal Expenses. See our Ad in this issue or call JW at 256-6738190.

BOTTOMLINE WEB DESIGN Web Sites starting at ONLY $29.95 per month. Call 256-673-8190. BRIGITTE’S CHILDREN’S CLOTHING 403 Martling Road, Albertville. 256-744-8404 or 256506-5853. Family owned business Specializing in Boys and Girls Clothing Sizes Newborn to 14. CUSTOM PEST CONTROL Termite and Pest Services. We Guarantee Our Service! No Contract, No Commitment... Just Dead Bugs! 256-593-6613 JOE’S PAWN SHOP 11411 US Hwy 431 in Albertville. Buy, Sell, Trade, Pawn. Open 8am - 6pm, 7 days a week. 256-894-9994. See Our Ad In This Issue of the Nifty Pickle.

PRIDE MOBILITY ELECTRIC Z CHAIR. Only used a few times. Only $495. Call 256-593-6796 between 8am - 2pm. KARAOKE EQUIPMENT FOR SALE. Amp, Speakers and stands, Microphones, All necessary Cords. $850 obo. Call James at 256-6738190.

Place Your Yard Sale Ad Here. Only $5 per week for up to 30 Words. Mail your ad and payment to Nifty Pickle, 7032 US Hwy 431, Albertville, AL 35950 or you can come by the office located at that address. The deadline is every Monday at Noon.

McCLENDON AUCTION HOUSE Returns and Shelf Pulls from ALL Major Box Stores. Open Monday - Saturday 9am until 5pm. Sale on Saturday and Thursday at 6:30pm. 702 Chastain Blvd West, Glencoe. 256-492-5333.

FOR RENT in Albertville Shopping Center on Hwy 431. Best location in Albertville. 3,500 or 7,000 square feet. Large parking lot with lights and 4 exits and entrances. All businesses in ShopMcCLENDON WHOLESALE ping Center doing good business. Buy It By The Pallet. Returns and Call Fred Taylor at 256-878-8383 Shelf Pulls from All Major Stores. or 256-878-2552. Great for Auctions, Trade Day, Watch for the Brand Yard Sales, etc. Open Tuesday New Issue of the Friday 9am until 4pm. Claybrook Road in Albertville. Call Charlie at Nifty Pickle coming in 256-477-3914 for more informalate January! tion. Knock Knock: Who’s there? 2:30 2:30 who? I made a dentist appointment cause my “tooth hurty.”

Knock Knock: Who’s there? Odor Odor who? Odor In This Here Court!

Knock Knock: Who’s there? Eskimo Eskimo who? Eskimo questions, I’ll tell you no lies!

CLASSIFIEDS

$5 each week for 30 words or less. 10¢ each additional word. Mail your ad and payment to Nifty Pickle, 7032 US Hwy 431, Albertville, AL 35950 or you can come by the office located at that address. The deadline is every Monday at Noon.

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