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Blazed and Confused? So is Mr Whippy. Nom Nom Nom Butter Chicken. WSU AGM: Who’s selling what?

Meet your mayoral candidates

elcom sue Fo


Editorial Team Editor Alix Higby

Deputy Editors Louise Hutt & Jess Edmonds-Saunders News Editor zanian steele Online Editor Alix Higby

Graphic Designer Haylie Gray

Managing Editor James Raffan

Advertising Advertising Manager Tony Arkell

Contributors C-Ball, Kathlene Cook, Daniel Petersen, Matt Hicks, Morgahna Godwin, HP, Danyell Summers, Dr Richard Swainson, Jess Molina, Gil Denny, Amber, Tony Stevens, Hoss and Ayman Aneece, Liana Tere, Jackson MasonMackay, Suzanne Cunningham, Craig Burns, Rhiannon Bond, Nicola Potts, Zac Lyon and Aaron Letcher Print Fusion Print

Nexus Nexus is a member of the Aotearoa Student Press Association (ASPA). The views expressed in this publication are not necessarily the views of Nexus magazine, the WSU, Printers, the editor or any of our advertisers. Ground Floor, Student Union Building Gate One, University of Waikato Knighton Road, Hamilton online @waikatostudents

issue 22 / VOLUME 45 / 23 SEPTEMBER / 2013 News

[3] University News. [4] News. [6] Sports Thoughts. [8] Not News.

Opinion [10] Lettuce to the Editor. [12] Photo and Sign [13] Top Ten

Entertainment and Reviews [14] Film, Gig & CafĂŠ review. Horoscopes [15] Game, Comic & Album review. Horoscopes [16] @Honest_Matt Meets... [17] Eight Ball. Cool Not Cool. [18] Puzzles [20] Feature - Meet the Uni Rep Candidates [22] Feature - Mayoral Interviews


[26] President’s Column + Veeps [27] Ask Amber + Citizens Advice Bureau + Young Workers Resource Centre


[28] Food Page [29] Auteur + Google This [30] Religiousity + Little Beer Corner [31] Campus Style [32] Louise vs The World + Making Living Cheaper [33] Arts - Anna Cunningham [34] Guru DJ + Blazed & Confused [35] Mr Minty Fish + Diary of a Single Girl [36] Was This You? [37] Shit You Can Do




Highlight Reel


this week in nexus // Pg: 22

What’s that, more elections?! There are two ways this editorial could go. A. I briefly apologise for the boring but necessary coverage of local body elections and those of our university council, and then proceed to encourage you to take an active interest in both because they are clearly very, very important and it is your civic duty, etc. 2. I go off on yet another tangent influenced by my current 1.13am why-am-I-attracted-toemotionally-unavailable-men state of mind, but sketchily draw the topic back to politics in a contrived and obvious way.

have it already. I had a pressing assignment due that afternoon so I was in for a good time, not a long time, but the speed at which business concluded kinda surprised me. People were just like, yeah yeah yeah, sell our assets where’s the pizza (I was organising my references during the AGM so don’t take this perception as gospel.) Either we are a very trusty little bunch of students, or everything just went wooooooooosh over empty heads hoping to fill the void with grease and alcohol. It’s hard to say, I didn’t hang around. Anyway, while I was sitting on my couch at 1am thinking about how I always want the guy that I can’t have, I started to think that

“...maybe democracy is just too easy for us. It’s too available. It calls us as soon as we get home to tell us what a great night it had, and that it hopes we exercise our right to vote again soon” You and I both know that regardless of the path I take, we’re both going to end up 5 minutes down on life, wondering if any part of this lecture’s rambling incoherence is going to be in the exam and if you still don’t get it by then, how many other things do you need to get to still get a B. Politics. Distracting students from things that really matter since, well has anyone actually pinpointed the moment that shit got really apathetic? Not yet, but they will – history usually takes about 30 years to make some kind of sense. Try explaining, in 2053, to your grandkids, “I just really didn’t care.” It’s not as cool as, and will never be as cool as, “I got arrested for protesting against the Vietnam War.” (Dave Mac, 2013) I went to the WSU AGM last Thursday. It was over and done in about half an hour, motions were passed ridiculously swiftly, and all anyone seemed to think about was the promise of free beer and pizza and why didn’t they 2

maybe democracy is just too easy for us. It’s too available. It calls us as soon as we get home to tell us what a great night it had, and that it hopes we exercise our right to vote again soon. Maybe if we had to fight for it, if it never wanted to talk about ‘what’s going on with us’, if it took 2 hours to respond to a message, then maybe we’d be interested. Either democracy needs to learn to play hard to get, or we need to grow up and appreciate how well we are being treated. In this particular metaphor, I think we should go with the latter. Nexus has made it easy, with feature articles on candidates for both the Hamilton Mayoral elections, and the student member for the university council. Read up. Appreciate how good you’ve got it, fair elections and all. Well, shit. Guess I took option B. Alix

Mayoral Candidate Interviews Meet the people who want to represent your city... // Pg: 20

Your University Council Candidates ...and the ones who want to stand for you on campus. // Pg: 11

Mental Illness It’s Mental Health Awareness Week next week, learn about it. // Pg: 34

Blazed and Confused Our stoner columnist finally gets around to writing. We have been asking since O-Week // Pg: 28

Food for thought Let butter chicken get you through those late night study sessions.



SCHOOL’S IN FOR SUMMER Want to speed up, catch up or try something new? The University of Waikato offers two summer school semesters: T Semester (4 November - 13 December 2013) and S Semester (6 January - 21 February 2014). These condensed six-week study terms are an ideal opportunity to take extra papers or try something new. To see a full list of papers available, visit

STUDY ABROAD AND EXCHANGE FAIR Travel, study and earn credit towards your University of Waikato degree while experiencing foreign cultures first-hand. Come along to the Student Centre Foyer on Wednesday 2 October from 11am-2pm to find out more about how to add a truly global dimension to your university life, what it all costs, how to apply and what countries you can visit.

WORKSHOP: LIFTING OFF The workshop Lifting Off: An Introduction to Postgraduate Research and Study will take place on Wednesday 9 October from 8.50am-1.00pm. It will provide an overview of the journey ahead and will show candidates what they can expect during their postgraduate study. RSVP to by 10am Wednesday 2 October including your ID number and School/Faculty of study.

3 MINUTE THESIS Heats for the 3 Minute Thesis (3MT) competition begin this week. Heat 1 is on 23 September at 3.30pm in S.G.05. Heat 2 is on 25 September at 11.30am in S.G.01. Heat 3 is on 26 September at 9.30am in S.G.03. Heat 4 is on 27 September at 1.30pm in S.G.03. Head along and hear PhD candidates pitch their research to a lay audience in three minutes.

RESIDENTIAL STUDENT MEMBER OF HALLS COUNCIL– VOTING OPEN STAFF 2014 Voting is now open to elect the 2014 student member for the University Council. All enrolled students are eligible to vote, and voting closes at 4.30pm on Friday 4 October 2013. To find out more about the candidates and to place your vote, visit www.waikato.

An information session will be held on Wednesday 25 September 2013 in S.1.02 at 6pm for anyone interested in applying to be a Senior Residential Assistant or Residential Assistant in our Halls of Residence in 2014. You must be a full-time student in 2014 to be eligible to apply for the positions. For more info contact Bethea Weir at

3 A


NEWS Aaron finally (almost) sold an asset. It took him his entire first year in office but WSU President and former CNI Young Nat has the approval to make his first and likely only asset sale after the WSU Annual General Meeting. The Waikato Students’ Union has authority to sell a 24% stake in uLeisure to the University of Waikato for no less than $830,000 following approval at last week’s

NZUSA AND WSU DIVORCE: No word yet on who gets custody of the cats. It’s official. We are now a union, that is no longer part of a union. Professional muckrakers the Waikato Students’ Union have now officially withdrawn from NZUSA. “During meetings with NZUSA President Pete Hodkinson we expressed our concerns about the shape and direction of NZUSA and after waiting for the last few weeks we have not seen enough to give us confidence that 4

AGM. “We will continue to hold a 26% stake in the company and have two seats on the board.” Letcher said. Letcher told the crowd of 60 students that the plan was to use $100,000 for a much needed technology and infrastructure update of the organisation while the rest of the sale proceeds would be gifted to the WSU trust. “The equity built up in uLeisure is the result of years of students investing in the WSU and it would be irresponsible of us to spend it all at once,” he said.

The motion was passed with only one dissenting voice recorded. Although he did not want to be identified the man later told Nexus “I wasn’t representing a club or anyone else but I just feel that once you sell an asset like that you can never get it back.” Other items passed at the AGM included the 2014 budget only notable because it included a 10% increase in honoraria for directors returning for their second or subsequent years.

“By placing the money in the trust we are safeguarding the long term future of the organisation.”

this will change without dramatic action to correct the organisation,” said WSU President Aaron Letcher. “Since then everyone has decided to come out and agree with us but no one is willing to offer practical solutions on how to fix the problem and until they do we will not be spending more in NZUSA fees.” Nexus first reported weeks ago the WSU’s intention to withdraw which triggered crisis meetings with NZUSA representatives, created pages of stories in every student magazine and allowed OUSA President Francisco Hernandez a chance to help Dunedin voters learn his name. Letcher also addressed the stories regarding the WSU exit including our own assertion that he may have been coup d’etat out of his own coup d’etat after OUSA suggested they had seized control of the NZUSA debate from Aaron. “Since we announced we wanted to leave, I

have read a number of things in this magazine and others that question whether this is a stunt or we are just causing problems but the reality is this is common sense and responsibility. This is our board on behalf of Waikato Students saying that NZUSA isn’t doing the job we need it to do and we can’t simply sit back and blindly give it twenty grand a year in the hope that someone might eventually get it doing what students need it to do.” “We won’t waste any more time this year talking to magazines or releasing statements about it because it seems like this whole problem has occurred because there has been a lot of talk and not much action. We are taking action and withdrawing.” A number of attempts were made to reach NZUSA President Pete Hodkinson for comment however none were successful.


In Their Words “My personal response is in the future I have to look at what I am earning and say, what is appropriate for me to earn given that many people in our society don’t even have enough to participate meaningfully in our society.” Bishop Justin Duckworth “It is true that I hit the wall. The explanation I offer, as I leave this place, is that the core of my inner being was rocked by discovering that the same ethical approach that guides clinicians and health professionals in their work, did not apply to those managing the public health system in such an environment.” Resigning Labour MP Lianne Dalziel “You look at the different life opportunities of kids depending on whether they grow up in Parnell or Porirua. Those kids have very different starts in life and that leads to different kinds of jobs, which leads to very different salaries and earnings.” Max Rashbroke author of Inequality: A New Zealand Crisis. “If he had nothing to hide and wasn’t bothered by what we are saying then he would have opened his shop today and spoken to us. It’s a cowardly act to lock the shop up and it’s also cowardly to set up a shop with no signage and sell synthetic highs.” Protest co-ordinator Shardell Quinn following last week’s Hamilton east protest of a new legal high shop.

$63,000 $30,800 The salary of Wellington Anglican The average wage of a single income Bishop Justin Duckworth who is look- household in New Zealand in the ing to cut his wages after new poverty middle band of income distribution. stats were announced. PERCENT of New Zealand’s wealth is controlled by 1% of its population. The minimum amount the WSU will sell a 24% stake in uLeisure for after last week’s AGM. The average cost to treat someone seriously injured in a car accident.

$830,000 16 $625,000 2017 120 according to incumbent Mayor Julie Hardaker, Hamilton will be out of debt.


year anniversary of the women’s suffrage move- disappointed Te Aroha residents after ment celebrated a petition to stop the building of a new last week. liquor store.

the increase in the minimum size of Snapper (from 27cm to 30cm). After the government abandoned controversial plans to slash the Snapper quota.



the amount property values in North Waikato have allegedly dropped after Contact energy announced plans to move a 168-turbine wind farm into the area... according to residents.

A Thousand Words Demonstrators lie on the ground to represent people who disappeared and went missing during Augusto Pinochet’s regime, during the 40th anniversary of the coup d’etat in Santiago, Chile Picture: Reuters



SPORTS THOUGHTS National Rugby League Conspiring Against Queensland.

They aren’t actually, but Johnathan Thurston and every single Neanderthal fan of Queensland-based teams are currently pissing their pants over a horrible refereeing botch-up which saw the Cronulla Sharks score a try against the North Queensland Cowboys during a set which involved seven tackles, one more than the standard six allowed. The Cowboys went on to lose the game by two points, causing Origin and Kangaroo superstar Johnathan Thurston to throw a hissy fit the way only indispensable players can and going so far as to allege that the NRL is conspiring against Queensland teams and working to give Sydney based clubs a helping hand, possibly with the help of Al Qaeda, Monsanto and defence contractors around the world. So, for you morons out there wearing your Broncos or Maroon jerseys to University as if you have any real affiliation to the teams, I’m going to point out why it is now certain that Thurston is blatantly pig-shit stupid. It would seem strange that the NRL would happily ruin its own audience ratings just 6

to create an all Sydney final, because by doing so, they will alienate fans from the Queensland region and Melbourne. The best possible Grand Final for viewership would be the Storm versus the Broncos because Sydney league fans tune in regardless. It’s a known fact. Sydney clubs aren’t even needed in the final for it to sell out. It will. Thurston and many Queenslanders seem to think the NRL and Sydney in general are bitter because of Origin. If this was the case - why didn’t the NRL mess with the refereeing during the Origin series? Why didn’t they ban a couple of Queensland superstars like they did to Kiwis two weeks before the Anzac test? If Origin was the motivating factor, it seems strange to think Queensland clubs would suffer. On top of that, refereeing has been pathetic all year, not just a sudden plague to grip the Cowboys out of nowhere. Every team has dealt with the horrible linesmen and Lord of the Douchebags Daniel Anderson, the referee boss who holds no accountability and doesn’t seem to bother crushing skulls

when referees ruin games. Finally, the Sharks beat the Cowboys through such a controversial blunder by a miniscule two points, and the try in question was scored in the first half. Thurston and the Cowboys had more than enough time to sort their shit out and win the match regardless. After the event, bitching about being penalised and treated unfairly seems rather pathetic. None of the Cowboys will ever last a day in a Warriors uniform, being given less than half the time to hold an opponent down that Australian clubs are afforded. What’s worse - Thurston will probably be allowed free rein to make such unfounded accusations without being reprimanded, fined, or banned. Because that’s the leeway superstars are afforded, and if there really is a conspiracy, I’m sure no one in the NRL wants to deprive the Kangaroos of their first choice of half just before the World Cup.





NOT NEWS Katy Perry is Horrible According to animal rights activists the chart topping video “Roar” showed Perry exhibiting shocking and cruel behaviour in the video. According to a spokesperson for Peta “They often become stressed and anxious when hauled around and forced into unfamiliar or frightening situations,” As Nexus has always been a friend to the animals we decided we would check it out first hand on the internet. We found “roar” to be both cruel and unusual punishment and after a few repeats it had us banging our own cages with anxiety. God help us if we ever actually find a version with the music video attached.

Win A Prize LONDON: A pair of teenagers were escorted from a McDonalds for being too formal. The teens decided to bring in their own plates, cutlery, table cloth and wine glasses into the restaurant and were asked to leave. In the spirit of this Nexus is asking students to take photos and video of yourself in an op shop suit or formal wear. Order a meal, set a table with a table cloth, plates, cutlery and wine glasses and see how long you can stay in a McDonalds, Burger King or Wendy’s. Best video will get dinner for two on us.

Headlines from the Waikato Times.

Kawhia fights year-round booze ban plan If I lived in Kawhia I would be drunk every day.

Ngaruawahia Utd turned me into a bad sports journalist Come on man, you work for the Waikato Times. Post hoc ergo propter hoc.

Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth call off engagement Remember when people used to read the Waikato Times for hard hitting journalism? No? Well neither do we.

Pot beats Pies At least that’s the case in Palmerston North where former convenience store owner and iconic naked pie salesman Leighton Haar has stripped his Fitzherbert Ave shop of its pies, drinks and confectionery in order to comply with regulations to get an interim licence to sell the psychedelics. “When I went down to about one-third of the customers I had before, 100 percent great people, it was boring because I didn’t have the flow and I’m a people person. I’m here for the people first, I’ve got what they want, we’ve got a good transaction and at the end of the day, because I provide the best service around I make quite a bit of money.” In case this article is ever referenced in a future trial out bet is “Mr Haar, in the conservatory, with the lead pipe”


WTF: Waikato Times Focus

Police nab store selling synthetics It isn’t really police work if the guy has a sign in his window advising people he is selling things. The war on drugs is clearly working.

Nawton outsells Rototuna Initially this wasn’t a surprise. Turns out the article is about real estate.

Saved by a Sharknado Sadly not the answer to the question “What would make the America’s Cup interesting?”

Lorde’s got the goods That’s right, several weeks after her billboard and alternative success, millions of dollars worth of radio play, digital downloads in the 100,000’s, and being anointed alternative music’s new “it girl” the Waikato Times is ready to suggest she might do well. Way to be bold.


simon says On 15 September 2013 18:24, _ > Dear Simon, > i am a student from comp204 of group 3rd Degree. Our members found that our > own android devices’ screen are not the same setting of the one we developed > in eclipse. For the purpose of better testing, we just wondering if there is > any way that we can borrow an android device? > thank you for your time to reading this email On 15 September 2013, 10:33PM _ First of all, the name is Dr Spacey -- graduating top of the class in CS at 2 of the world’s top 5 universities and having 6 other degrees coving just about every topic related to CS undoubtedly means I earned that academic title as far as anyone in any country could be concerned, we are not drinking buddies and you are a second year, not even a Ph.D. student or one of my personal supervises... when you get to similar academic level you can call me Simon. Secondly, each team was given an Android device. You were advised in class and I believe on Moodle to develop for that screen size only. If you have not followed the advice, I can not help you. Your android device is fixed, if for some reason your team did not sign one out, then you could ask for what even is available from Cameron. Best wishes, Dr Simon Spacey B.Sc.(Hons), M.Sc., M.B.A., J.L.P., D.E.A., D.CSC., D.I.U., Ph.D. Head of the Computational Optimisation Group˜sspacey

LAST WEEK ON TWITTER... BIG NEWS - I got a mosquito bite on my neck and it is really itchy @justinbieber Should I get a tattoo of bacon or cheese?? @Caradelevingne Just had a full conversation with a guy who wasn’t the guy I thought he was. @edsheeran Trying to type, tweet, twerk and ride a wrecking ball naked all at the same time while carrying a sledge hammer is proving difficult! PEACE @billyraycyrus Just once I’d like to see the headline “Kate Middleton Looks Like Shit, Snarls at Onlookers.” @diablocody the new song @lordemusic released last night...”team” @RyanSeacrest Saw a photo of Miley Cyrus with her tongue sticking out. Wow! She should do another one of those! @SteveMartinToGo



LETTUCE TO THE EDITOR. Nexus loves getting your letters. We also love it if they are funny, intelligent and well written. Mainly we will be happy if you keep them under 250 words, it saves us having to cut them down. Please remember to give us a real name when you send them in even if you want to write with an alias. Email us at or...

Guy vs. Palm Oil Part I Hey lettuce, Why the frick does everything I enjoy contain palm oil? or vegetable oil as they label it. Is a man not entitled to eat something which doesn’t kill off poor baby orang-outangs? Even milo has palm oil in it, and it’s destroying the rainforest, killing lots of baby animals and polluting singapore. Can we do something about it? Yours sincerely, That guy who is very pissed of about palm oil.

Guy vs. Palm Oil Part II Why does the vegie queiche from couplands contain animal fat? Why do most of their baked good contain animal fat, and palm oil? (Animal fat does not refer to butter here), it means lard or such like. It’s foul. Yours sincerely the guy who wants to buy bread but can’t because he’s a vegetarian with some sort of ethics or something.

Nexus loves handwritten notes Re: Letter to the Editor After a lot of consideration, I have decided to write to you and state and opinion about the “talk” I attended with a large number of people a month and a half ago - “Writers Without Borders”. I found it to be a boring, 10


time wasting ‘chat’ by supposedly celebrated authors and poets. Two examples to back up my genuine complaint:a. The Poet Jack Ross read a limited selection of first verses of his poetry. There was very little explanation of his “origins” of thought, where he had gained his inspiration for a poem, his use or non-use of technical aspects etc. b. The Lady Professor who read from her “new” book - based in Germany or Austria or wherever. Yet she gave minimal background to her writing technique or plot development. She could have told us more about what really inspired her to write this book. Yet she is a Professor of English! The lady who introduced the authors appeared to have her own agenda during the question time, allowance was only made for a couple of questions. Finally the visiting United States Authoress Lyn Bloom, although being obviously very knowledgeable about her craft of writing appeared to be a little tired. Like her colleagues around her she didn’t appear to have an aim to impress the audience with that knowledge. I was expecting a good, fiery set of discussions on the craft of writing with lessons to be provided for further thought. I was disappointed! Against all this, I attended a set of talks at the Waikato Museum/Art Gallery - around the same time. It was very, very lively and thoroughly informative. The food and drinks provided at the University Arts Centre were lovely as was the service but .............! Yours faithfully T.A. McGhie

PS: I have no formal connection to the Waikato Museum.

Help Me Nexus Hey Nexus, I just wanted to make a shameless plug for my fundraising efforts. I’m currently trying to raise $4,000 as I need to make an unexpected trip to Philadelphia. A paper I submitted to the PRSA conference has been honoured with the Educators Academy Top Research Paper Award 2013. My supervisor tells me this is a pretty big achievement for a paper from New Zealand to be recognized recognized by the US centred PRSA. Originally, my supervisor, Margalit, was supposed to present the paper as I would not be able to afford the trip on my student budget; but this unexpected award means I’m now raising funds to get there. If you want to help me fundraise, please check out my Givealittle page: Murray/. Please help me get there! #RepresentingNZ Murray Riches

Are you ready to apply for a job?? University Citizens Advice Agency Employment Seminar 24th Sept 5-7pm Bryant Hall Buttery(hot scones and drink at 5pm ) 5.15- 6 Employment Law Community Law Centre lawyer 6-7 pm CV and Interview Techniques Sharon Jefferies (University Careers) All Welcome

DISCLAIMER Letters published contain the opinion of the writer and the writer alone. Nexus publications take no responsibility for the content or opinions so expressed. By submitting your letter you give consent to its publication in Nexus and subsequent public scrutiny. Letters are the authors own work and Nexus will not edit to compensate for lack of intelligence or coherency. Nexus reserves the right to edit or refuse to publish any letter which breaches any law, is defamatory to any person, or contains threats of violence or hate speech.




What do you look for in a candidate?



TOP TEN Top Ten things girls lie about. 10_

“I’m totally fine just keeping it casual.”


09_ “I can run in these heels. Watch.” 08_ “Oh, that angry message wasn’t meant for you… it was supposed to go to a friend. I’m so okay that you didn’t tell me where you were last night. So okay with it.”

07_ “I go for like, five runs a week.” 06_ “I just never have time to eat

these days.”

05_ “You’re definitely not overreact

ing. You are so within your rights to burn all her things.”

04_ “You are so much prettier than her.”

03_ “I love your shoes, where did you

get them?”

02_ “I’m so povo right now.” *swipes

card at momento*


“I just don’t know what to do, what should I do?” *Trick question – see Guru DJ.

tEN17 “I dropped out of school as soon as I could (16) because I hated it. Everyone there had a better life than me and being there just reminded me of that.” Josh was 16 when he left school. He hadn’t seen his mum since he was 11 and his dad was scarcely around either. He had nowhere to go and nothing to do. “Because every service either judged me or was religious, I didn’t seek help.”


Imagine if you’d never been supported by an adult. If no one had ever believed you could do something, or looked at your homework, or yelled at you when you got a detention. Yeah you’ve heard this before, and yeah you don’t really care, but maybe you could just stop for a second and think about someone other than yourself. Approximately 18,000 youth (aged between 0-15) lived involuntarily below the poverty line within the Waikato region in 2011. Not everyone gets the same start in life and youths like Josh are at risk of becoming lost, forgotten, and voiceless. These are the ghosts of our society.


Ten17 #Ghostlife is a social campaign created by a group of 3rd year PR students to raise support for a youth hub for Hamilton, similar to Rotorua’s “Da Bomb.” The proposed hub would cater to youth aged between ten and seventeen, providing them with access to free medical care, well-being services, support and advocacy services, and development workshops to help with self esteem and future goal planning, as well as a safe place to go should they need one. Currently Hamilton has minimal services for youth, and this age group is almost completely uncatered for. If kids aren’t in school then the rest of society ignores them rather than asking why they’re not attending and what might actually be going on with them, resulting in them being ghosts of society. Not talked about or to. Currently the campaign is collecting letters of support for the Hamilton Youth Hub via a public petition. Approximately 250 signatures are needed to legitimize their feasibility report that will be presented to the Hamilton City Council late next month, the HCC have identified well-being as one of their top four priorities but currently have no action plan for tackling it. To support the campaign head to Facebook and search “Ten17 #Ghostlife” or visit to sign your support.

Leaving town soon? Need storage?


Call Shirley or Nigel for all the details: 3 month $200 Ph 846 6144 176 Ellis St Frankton SAVE


Safe, secure, affordable 13

entertainment & reviews


Bloggers meet-up LIDO CINEMA film

Gardening with Soul Rating: A film about a 90 year old nun from Wellington who gardens, might not sound like a film worthy of a 5-star rating, but hear me out. Gardening with Soul is as beautiful and surprising as Sister Loyola Galvin is. The film explores many different elements of Sister Loyola’s life; how she hid her Osteomyelitis in order to become a nurse, her views on women in the church and why she no longer wears a habit. Not weighed down by rituals or traditions, Sister Loyola’s views on faith are practical and simple, and her liberal views often come with a side of cheek and charm. Her unwavering love can be seen in everything she comes in contact with; from building a memorial for stillborn babies she looked after as a nurse, or unwanted children with birth defects from thalidomide, who as adults still come to visit her. Yet she doesn’t ask for any recognition; in front of the camera she is honest and unassuming. You get the impression she would rather show you herbs she’s just planted than the Queen’s Service Medal for Community Service she received.

Rating: Did you know that there are over 152,000,000 blogs on the internet at the time of this writing? No, I’m not making that up. Another statistic shows that companies that blog have 55% more web visitors than those who don’t. There is no doubt that blogging has slowly been creeping into our radar for a while now. Bloggers of this century are influential and are here to stay. Last Sunday was the first meet-up of the Hamilton Bloggers Network. Admittedly, the turnout wasn’t as good as expected but because it was the first ever get together of it’s kind, the turnout was the least of our worries for the day. It’s always awkward initially when you put a bunch of relatively strangers together for the first time (Fun fact: Some bloggers only know each other by usernames on the cyberspace!) but the relaxed setting of the gig helped take the pressure off. Picnic blankets were set-up, there was heaps of food (yummy homemade treats – what else can you expect from a blogger?) to be shared, and the fun officially began. A small circle was formed and each blogger introduced themself starting with their actual names, blogger URL, and what they blogged about.

pay & cafÉ

Milk & Honey Rating: Hiding amidst the tall buildings of Hamilton CBD, there is a café perched on a rooftop (or more precisely, the top floor of the T&G building) overlooking glorious Garden Place. Once you find your way into the building and reach the fifth floor, you may think you’ve got the wrong building. But don’t be deceived, this chic and urban café is nestled in with some quaint yet modern offices. Milk & Honey offers a bountiful selection of tea and coffee, which any caffeine lover would adore. Once you have selected your preferred brew, you are then presented with the option of taking a seat inside, or on the picturesque balcony. As you wait for your order the café atmosphere is relaxed. The space is open planned which makes the café feel spacious, avoiding the generic cluttered look many cafés strive for.

If you’ve got a blog and are interested in meeting new people and growing your audience, email

As for the food, it can simply be described as “yum!” A delectable dish is their pasta salad, which was well presented and very tasty, as all their sweet and savoury treats seemed to look as well. Their pricing is like most cafés, so don’t be scared to indulge. This plainly cool café really does bring a sense of plenty as its name suggests, and is worth a visit on any grey or sunny Hamiltonian day. Milk it for a swell afternoon of luxury, and honey, you’ll be impressed!

Jess Molina

Julia Jeanplong




(21 mar - 20 apr)

(21 apr - 21 may)

(22 may - 21 june)

Beware of objects falling from the sky. Thanks for the budget cuts Air NZ.

Two more weeks of Nexus and then you might actually have to pay attention in study sessions.

Open your mind and body, allow yourself to love and be loved (this horoscope brought to you by the Waikato Uni polygamous society)

Filmmaker Jess Feast doesn’t shy away from the hard questions, asking about the recent scandals in the Catholic Church as well as how she feels about getting older. The cinematography and structure of the film show Feast’s ability to convey the beauty Sister Loyola sees in everything, whether it be winter, spring, summer or autumn. Gardening with Soul is a truly beautiful film, inside and out.

In between taking photos, updating social media accounts, and chit-chatting, the bloggers picnic was quite a success. The aim of the group is to draw the Hamilton blogging community closer, and the meet-up was a step in that direction.



entertainment & reviews


Nemesis Mark Millar and Steve McNiven Rating:


Artimis fowl Rating: So we all know that Harry Potter is what we all secretly (some more openly) dream their life was like. It is the magical world that we escaped to in our childhood and I know that I for one (in a more public display of Harry Potter loverhood) would freakin’ love to taste a Butter Beer! But do you remember Harry’s overshadowed buddy Artemis Fowl? Artemis Fowl came out in 2001, so a little later than Harry, but it carried with it similar realms of magical intrigue. I liked this book because it was more focused on the underworld of the fairies than the people up on the surface. I do not mean fairies like the ones I reviewed last week (you may be noticing a theme) but fairies that wear army gear and are kick arse! It also has an evil mastermind (Artemis) who is a child (extra cool when you are the same age and feel primary is a little dull at the moment). In yet another comparison to Harry Potter, Artemis Fowl is like if the house elves had a book about their fight against a Wizard. They have to live by different rules to the humans, they have to keep hidden and they have magic particular to them. This review may have inspired you to read Harry Potter more than Artemis Fowl (get Harry Potter on audiobooks read by Stephen Fry) but I do recommend this book for some light magical reading.

Of all the comic creators out there, Mark Millar is the master of taking an old storytelling convention and making it feel novel and fresh again. He’s the man that bought us KickAss, which took the old comic-book formula of the ‘down and out’ average Joe turned superhero and made it, well, kick-ass! He took the Incredible Hulk and gave us a family of hulks and, along with Steve McNiven, he gave us Civil War - taking the oldest, the most timeless of comic book institutions - superhero vs superhero - and made it feel real and important. For Nemesis, that same creative team reunite, but the results are frustratingly poor. Nemesis is essentially evil Batman. A rich, bored villain who turns his attention to killing and maiming whoever he can. The level of violence and gore is as high as ever for a Millar book, but here it simply seems an attempt at disguising - rather than transcending - the blandness of its core concept. There are moments - twists and turns are at a premium and although stupid they do succeed in keeping things interesting. Still, I’m disappointed; the cover alone is pretty badass and I was dying to read this, but ultimately, this is an hour of my life I wouldn’t mind back. On art, Steve McNiven is typically awesome and he helps keep the book somewhat interesting. This is not his best work, but heck, even at his worst, Steve McNiven is no slouch. Nemesis is pure comic book junk food. Some will love it, but most won’t. Kick-Ass was great, Civil War was a comic event to remember, Nemesis is a mess to forget. Daniel Petersen


Another Life Black City Lights Rating: This wellington duo is making all the right noises both musically and through the reception of said music. Reviewers continue to laud the pair with comments that can be surmised in near salivating terms and with their new album, Another Life, it is easy to see why. The album fuzzes into life with a grizzly intro that evaporates into thudding drums and the striking and delicate vocals of Julia Catherine Parr on ‘Give it up’. Parr, a classically trained vocalist, dances her sweet sounds around the misty beats of Calum Robb’s production. Robb, who is apparently self-taught, provides the ultimate soundscape for Parr with electric shock snare cracks intermingled with haunting bass and driving rhythms. The pair harness each other’s qualities superbly on the track ‘Children’, which is one of the standout songs on the album. The jolty and swinging beats used on ‘Offering’ provide a tectonic springboard which sets Parr’s vocals off and leaping through the graces of her extensive range. She soars up to the high notes and swishes down through the melody arriving at punchy choruses. The punching is left to Robb’s beats on ‘Another Life’ as Parr’s vocals fade into almost instrumentation. The song seems to act more as a backdrop to an uprising of renegade fighters than to a dance party, but it is the ease in which Black City Lights sweep between electro-pop and something far more chilling that makes them so interesting. Grab for less than a tenner from

Kathlene Cook





(22 june - 23 july)

(24 july - 23 aug)

(24 aug - 23 sep)

The secret of life is, wherever possible, drink milk directly out of the carton.

Like the ducks that used to occupy the lake, it is getting time for you to leave. Unlike the ducks, you won’t be killed for sport by 3rd year law students.

Sometimes you feel like things are moving too fast around you, and in that spirit please remember at the time this was written it was 141,681 minutes till Christmas day.


entertainment & reviews

@Honest_Matt Meets

honest matt meets SANS ARCADE Honest_Matt has a one on one with Stu Preece the creative dynamo behind loud Auckland indie rockers Sans Arcade who have recently released their new EP ‘Re Entry‘.

Any standout tracks on the album you think we really gotta listen out for? The first two songs, for sure. Re Entry and Turn up the radio easily get the best response at shows.

So give us a brief overview for those not in the know. Who are Sans Arcade? How long have you been together? What kind of music do you make? What’s your back-story? There’s been a few versions of Sans Arcade over the years but in it’s current form we’ve been together about 2 years, give or take. Basically we’re four guys dead set on making a deafening ruckus you can rock out to. I don’t really keep up with micro-genre’s these days but it’s a super safe call to label us a rock band.

Where can we catch your next few shows, man? 5th October at Backbeat with Dead Beat Boys & Valedictions, then a couple of TBC shows in the pipeline before hitting the mighty Yot Club in Raglan on 21st December with These Automatic Changers. We’ll keep our facebook/ twitter/instagram/website feeds full of info though. Fingers crossed for a full North Island tour this summer.

How long did the new EP ‘Re Entry’ take to make? Way longer than we thought. We started recording demos in Feb 2012 with the intention of putting something online to help get more shows. Somewhere along the way things got horribly out of control and here we are 18months later. The final recordings themselves were started in late Jan of this year.

How would you describe your sound to someone not in the know? (i.e. your/or someone else’s grandma) Loud. Very loud. What’s been your proudest achievement as a band thus far? Sending out the, “it’s finally here” email to our crowd funders so that they could get their copy of the EP. I felt like a hamster on crack all afternoon.

moment so far? Glenn was relentlessly haggled by a (possibly homeless?) wasted old lady at an underground show last year. We like to think he gave as good as he got, he was definitely wearing more pants than she was. What’s been your favourite gig you’ve played at? The one with the wasted old lady. Hands down. What are the best and worst things about making music in little old Aotearoa? The people who show up, and the people who don’t. What would be your dream festival to play at and alongside whom? Lollapalooza with (no surprises here…) Foo Fighters, Thrice, Alice In Chains, Jimmy Eat World and Taking Back Sunday. Full interview available at

What’s been your finest crazy rock n roll




(24 sep - 23 oct)

(24 oct - 22 nov)

(23 nov - 21 dec)

You need a change, so does Nexus. Maybe you should become an editor.

It’s almost moving day and those dishes have been by your bed since O-Week.

If last week was pride and love week what does that make this week?


08 entertainment & reviews


eight ball

tHREE THINGS THAT ARE AWESOME RIGHT NOW AND THREE THINGS THAT AREN’T SO MUCH. COOL Three weeks till sweet, sweet freedom. Post Exams, of course.

Welcome to the 8 ball. In the depths of my gooey black ass I will answer the secrets OF THE universe. You may not like MY answerS but lets be honest who else is going to tell you the truth, ugly.

Will I pass this semester? No you will fail. Just like Jesus.

What colour hair dye will get me off a speeding ticket? Blonde. Dem H-town police officers go cray cray for a blonde. #easy

Daylight Savings. Cider on the green tonight, anyone?

How many people are going to vote in the council elections? No one will. Council is lame. Just like penne pasta. That shit is disgusting.

What papers should I take next year? Computer Science. That shit is the only knowledge you will require in ‘this’ world. Tea. Camomile, Peppermint, Raspberry; Cram it all in before your existence becomes a sweltering mess.

When will the Hamilton CBD be cool again? When the name of the city is changed and all the skanks have been baptized in the river #drowningbitches Why are 6/7 dwarfs not happy? Because you exist.


Whats better NZ got talent or sleep? I can’t even answer this. Really?!

Losing an hour. Town shuts early this Saturday! The sacrifices we make.

How many dates should you go on before doing the deed? Zero. Get it gurl. Will they build a Wendys closer to uni? No you fat fuck. Miley and Liam call it quits. Guess they couldn’t ‘twerk’ it out after all…

When will they build a wendys closer to uni? When you discover what exercise is. Will you take me to wendys? I tell you where I’ll take you - Weight Watchers. Asshole.

Miley Cyrus Jokes. I know, we just made one. But it should really be the last.




(22 dec - 20 jan)

(21 jan - 19 feb)

(20 feb - 20 mar)

Don’t trust your lecturer. Especially if you are trying to buy crack from them...we miss breaking bad already.

Try and be less of a douche bag. If this horoscope wasn’t helpful you should read some of the other comments in the Nexus online survey.

If you are reading this then it means the horoscope writer has died - please avenge me.


entertainment & reviews

Puzzle Page Complete the puzzle page, be the first to bring it in and show us, and you’ll win stuff!

Across 1. Friend (9) 7. Stringed instrument (5) 8. Part of a jacket (5) 9. Notion (4) 10. Prejudice (4) 13. Sand hill (4) 14. Vegetable (4) 17. Weak (5) 19. Freight (5) 20. Ended (9)

DIGI-SEARCH Find the hidden numbers - They may be horizontal or vertical. 04473, 05133, 05147, 10193, 11707, 19274, 23457, 29593, 34477, 37432, 47474, 64738, 73849, 87207, 94383, 99874.

Down 1. Stateroom (5) 2. Large house (7) 3. Worshipped (6) 4. Not working (4) 5. Short sleep (3) 6. Book of maps (5) 11. Disregarded (7) 12. Writing implement (6) 13. Postpone (5) 15. Stay clear from (5) 16. Tribe (4) 18. Part of a circle (3)










Meet the Uni Rep Can We are on the home stretch now. After a full WSU election, an ongoing council election, a needless leadership change of labour election and people in funny tinfoil hats complaining about fluoride in the water we have reached what might be the last meaningful bit of election coverage. Initially we were going to feature three candidates for the University seat on campus but already one has withdrawn. So here are the candidates, their photos and their views.

them as they come. How do you plan to consult with the student body about council matters that affect them? As the current Waikato Students’ Union President I am perfectly positioned to consult with the wider student body. I have a strong team around me to help conduct surveys, focus groups, or complete research that will assist me in representing student views. I also have a board of 11 capable students that I can bounce ideas off and consult.

Aaron Letcher Why do you believe we need a student member on the university council? Students are the customers of the University. The University needs customer feedback so they can ensure their product is top class. If students aren’t happy, the University should know about it. I believe a Student Member is the best mechanism to ensure student views are heard. What special talents do you possess that will best deliver what students need from this role? I wouldn’t say I have any special talents that would help me deliver in this role, I’m just your average student. I studied a Law and Social Sciences degree, and have served a year already on the Council and as WSU President. I suppose experience would be the key attribute I bring.

Do you have a particular goal or agenda in running for university council? There are no agendas. My goal would be to serve students to the best of my ability and consider the issues as they come forward. A years experience on the University of Council would tell me you never know what kind of issues will be brought forward - you just consider 20

Which university groups do you currently consult with? Through my role as WSU President and the current Student Member of the University Council I consult with as many groups as possible on all kinds of issues. We have currently just completed a comprehensive survey of over 400 students, and 100 face to face follow ups. I’m also plugged into the clubs network, that the WSU administers. Occasionally (or often), the interests of students may come into conflict with the direction of the university, how do you imagine you’ll manage this? If the interests of students conflict with the direction of the University I will always advocate for the student view. How will you conduct yourself in situations where your personal view or politics are contradictory to the view or will of the majority of students? The role is representative. Personal political views shouldn’t even enter the equation. A Student Member is there to represent the views of the majority of students, while offering a voice for smaller groups who may not be able to communicate their own views.



position I will definitely develop valuable qualities and gain priceless experiences. Most importantly, I will be on an exciting journey of learning. Be brave, take risks, nothing can substitute experience. I have nothing to lose.

Wei Cheng Phee Why do you believe we need a student member on the university council? The student member on the university council represents the voice of every single student in Waikato University. It goes without saying that students are the lifeline of the university. While university is a platform for students to pursue their further studies, a university cannot exist independent of its students. It is the students who make the university what it is. Hence, having a student member on the university council to represent the perspectives, needs, and demands of students is essential as this enables students’ point of view to be incorporated into the decision making process of the council. What special talents do you possess that will best deliver what students need from this role? From a young age, I have always had the passion and energy to excel. Many people have asked why I entered this year’s elections. I mean: I am a bloody science student; I belong in the labs culturing bacteria! I am young and most definitely an underdog of this race at the hormone-driven age of 19. When the other candidate has more experience and achievement, what do I have to offer? I have time, passion and energy. However, why can’t a science student get elected? Do they deserve to stay in the lab forever? Why can’t a 19 year old get elected? Do we lack that much in experience? Gaining a diploma in construction work does not mean you will build for the rest of your life. An underdog will never be an underdog forever. Being in my second year of study at the university, I have an understanding of how things work around here. I’m have had the privilege to be apart of a world renowned entrepreneurial group at the university, Enactus Waikato. Which, through opportunities, has taught me very valuable skills. I have represented Enactus at numerous corporate functions and has led an efficient marketing team. At high school, I was the student representative on the board of trustees which, gave me incredible insight to the overall management of an education institution. However, I am seeking to better myself as a person whilst learning to gain an understanding on a larger scale. Through this

Do you have a particular goal or agenda for running for university council? The biggest goal I want to accomplish or set in motion is to make sure every student’s voice is heard. I feel very strongly against the idea of segregation and the idea that not ALL students are being represented fairly; I want to change this. But most of all, I want to bring a fresh perspective to the table of discussion and represent what US truly stands for. And what is that? The University’s Students. How do you plan to consult with the student body about council matters that affect them? If elected, I plan to hear to the student’s needs and issues through a fortnightly open session where students can freely bring up any topics for discussion or matters to be forwarded to the council. On top of this, I would also set up an email address through which issues can be addressed more personally. Which university groups do you currently consult with? Enactus Waikato. Entrepreneurs taking action! This organisation has taught me how to manage, discuss and plan in advance for future events. More than anything, Enactus Waikato has been a opportunity that I’m glad I did not pass up! Occasionally (or often), the interests of students may come into conflict with the direction of the university, how do you imagine you’ll manage this? As a student member on the council, my role is to serve as a student member but at the same time, as a member of the council. This unique position means that I have a responsibility to bridge any potential differences between the two parties. I do believe, however, that any perceived conflict between the interests of the students and the direction of the university would be due to misunderstanding or miscommunication of information, as most decisions made by the council are ultimately made for the greater good of the university’s future which would inevitably ensure the welfare of students in the long run. Therefore, if such a situation occurs, I would manage it by properly communicating with the students to enable them to fully understand the situation. How will you conduct yourself in situations where your personal view or politics are contradictory to the view or will of the majority of students? In this case, my personal view would only be the view of a single person. If it is contradictory to the students, I will definitely listen to the student’s voice. As the student representative in the council, I serve to represent the students’ voice and therefore will put aside any conflicts of interests that I may have. 21


Mayoral Interviews Julie Hardaker 1. If elected what do you intend to do for students? Students are residents in our city just like everyone else so continuing to have a great quality of life is important. I think one of the key things for students will be that we continue working to bring jobs to the city through new business investment. The economic development plan which was developed last year in council included two skills forums, one which we have already had and one coming soon where we worked with local business owners and educational institutes to better align the skills that are being taught with the needs of business. 2. Give us your best “when I was a student” story. Most of them would be censored because being a student was a great time and I loved it. A tame one is that a group of us didn’t just do an all nighter but went 48 hours without sleep to complete an assignment. By the 36th hour we were completely off the rails. I don’t think any of us can remember what we ended up handing in but it was the lowest mark I ever recieved and I am normally a straight A student. 3. Fluoride? Yes / No / It’s complicated. It’s complicated. I thought the tribunal process was very good and informative and I had confidence in that process. Now we are going to a referendum and the new council will decide what to do with the result. Personally however, I will abide by the referendum. 4. Keeping open public libraries? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Yes 5. And municipal swimming pools? Yes / No / It’s complicated. It’s complicated. The council is doing a review of all facilities and 22


the possible demand for them in partnership with Sport Waikato and Sport New Zealand. It’s very good work and it will help us to decide what will happen next. I think it’s very important to have a holistic approach and have as much information as possible. 6. Should I be able to get free buses to the rugby? Yes / No / It’s complicated. You already can! The regional council provides the service for you. 7. Is that more important than a free bus service to ensure intoxicated students make it home safely? No, the most important service would be to ensure that intoxicated students get home at night and that is why you may note in my campaign this year I have been advocating for the Hamilton City Council to take over the running of the bus service. 8. If elected, what would you do to help students who are living in substandard flats and locked in to twelve month fixed term contracts? Nothing, because it’s not a role the council or the mayor can perform. I would suggest that students themselves and the students’ union in particular, advocate strongly to the Property Investors Council; who are the representative body for anyone who invests in rental properties. If they were to do that, then that is something I would be happy to support.

Ewan Wilson 1. If elected what do you intend to do for students? My economic development strategy which is to attract businesses that are a part of the supply chain for wellestablished Hamilton businesses will insure jobs when students graduate. There is nothing more frustrating to have completed your degree and find yourself unable to get a job or having to move away to find employment. 2. Give us your best “when I was a student” story. As a student pilot undergoing a simulated “in case of an engine fire scenario.” Actually switched the fuel off. The engine stopped and the instructor and I had a rather intense 60 second recovery. And a much longer debrief! 3. Fluoride? Yes / No / It’s complicated. I am Pro Fluoride, the science is clear its one of the most important health initiatives to improve oral health in the last 50 years. Most importantly I’m a Democrat that’s why I fought hard for referendum on fluoride to enable people to have their say, irrespective of their position on this matter. 4. Keeping open public libraries? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Libraries are a core Council activity. 5. And municipal swimming pools? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Yes. Council has an obligation to maintain assets that it’s developed and there’s a real need for the facility according to council figures. Furthermore, to revitalise the CBD we need to encourage more inner city living and rightly so they’ll have an expectation of council services and facilities, including a pool.

the rugby? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Yes, because of our shortage of parking around the rugby stadium and economic benefits that are derived from activities at the stadium it is in the city’s best interest to provide a free bus from ample city car parking to the stadium gates. 7. Is that more important than a free bus service to ensure intoxicated students make it home safely? I’m keen for the Hamilton City Council to take over the running of the public buses. Our role there is to ensure that we have an appropriate network and schedule that includes late nights and weekends. It should not be free. Students, like all members of society do have a level of self responsibility and I’m sure they can afford to keep a couple of dollars aside from drinking to get home. I accept we need to encourage students to use public transport so the right fear box mix is essential. 8. If elected, what would you do to help students who are living in substandard flats and locked in to twelve month fixed term contracts? Our job is to ensure our building inspectors and our colleagues at the Ministry of Health ensure that no one is living in unhealthy substandard accommodation. One of my key policies is that every councillor will have a portfolio of responsibility and more importantly accountability. With over 20,000 students in the city of Hamilton, you make up a very important aspect of what makes this city great. One of the portfolios will be student well-being. I am confident my councillor will proactively respond to any concern and I would personally get involved if required.

6. Should I be able to get free buses to 23


Ian Hanley 1. If elected what do you intend to do for students? The key concerns are a voice that is heard, this can be done through the Council Youth Representatives or direct to me. Young people want jobs and a career path and so I would encourage annual job fairs with representatives from Hamilton and national firms with real job offers and career opportunities, finance advisers and local banks to structure any student loan issues, and housing representatives to get people into their own homes as soon as possible. Tertiary institutions which offer further training opportunities. 2. Give us your best “when I was a student” story. I came late to academic study but I saved, studied, and completed a Masters from the University of Oxford. At graduation I would holiday in Ireland and return to study when the graduating year had gone. The whole graduation ceremony was in Latin! 3. Fluoride? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Yes to fluoride but it is a health issue and there should be a partnership with Government who should bear some of the costs. 4. Keeping open public libraries? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Yes, libraries are still very important, but how to use them might be helpful to some! 5. And municipal swimming pools? Yes / No / It’s complicated. 93 people drowned in NZ in 2012 and 132 in 2011. Yes, every person should be taught to swim and every child under five should be free and every immigrant settling in Hamilton should get free lessons and access to the local pool if they can’t swim.


6. Should I be able to get free buses to the rugby? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Yes, and as negotiated in Palmerston North and Wanganui, students and staff of tertiary institutions should get free access too by negotiation between the Regional Council and those Institutions. 7. Is that more important than a free bus service to ensure intoxicated students make it home safely? Intoxicated students should go to a “Sober Events Tent” staffed by St John’s and only then should they be released into the care of family or friends to get them home safely. They should not be hoisted on bus drivers or taxi drivers. 8. If elected, what would you do to help students who are living in substandard flats and locked in to twelve month fixed term contracts? Get Citizens Advice to advise them on their rights and obligation and those of the landlord so that they can move on to safe and clean accommodation. Education on leases and rent agreements are important.

Arshad Chatha 1. If elected what do you intend to do for students? All what is reasonable, just and affordable. 2. Give us your best “when I was a student” story. I am a law student and running for mayor. 3. Fluoride? Yes / No / It’s complicated. I will follow the majority public opinion. 4. Keeping open public libraries? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Yes. 5. And municipal swimming pools? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Yes. 6. Should I be able to get free buses to the rugby? Yes / No / It’s complicated. No. If buses are free to rugby, then they should be free to all other sports! 7. Is that more important than a free bus service to ensure intoxicated students make it home safely? Instead of intoxication, students should spend that money on food and books. 8. If elected, what would you do to help students who are living in substandard flats and locked in to twelve month fixed term contracts? Better housing facilities and tenancy contracts that are just to both sides.


Jack Gielen. 1. If elected what do you intend to do for students? If elected I will endeavor to encourage free education wiping out all student loans. I will make education relevant to what’s really happening and upskilling students to meet current world standards. I will support a values based creative alternative type of education. I will support teaching global skills for a global market keeping up with new information and knowledge. I will also support students having a philosophy or view in life. I will also promote better sports and recreational pursuits as well as Father Mother mentoring. 2. Give us your best “when I was a student” story. When I was a student they called me Gus, I played prop in the first fifteen although I was quite slim and I used to volunteer for the cane; putting books in our trousers to shield the hits. 3. Fluoride? Yes / No / It’s complicated. I am against poisonous fluoride. 4. Keeping open public libraries? Yes / No / It’s complicated. I am against the privatisation of libraries. 5. And municipal swimming pools? Yes / No / It’s complicated. All young adults and students should have free access to municipal swimming pools.Yes 6. Should I be able to get free buses to the rugby? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Yes you should. 7. Is that more important than a free bus service to ensure intoxicated students make it home safely? Yes it is, as students need appropriate alternative ways to occupy themselves. 8. If elected, what would you do to help students who are living in substandard flats and locked in to twelve month fixed term contracts? I would create better accommodation putting in place new flats. I would help create better more suitable contracts.

Dave MacPherson

Tony Dixon 1. If elected what do you intend to do for students? Ensure you live in a safe environment and are able to move around the city efficiently. 2. Give us your best “when I was a student” story. There was something about cheap cooking sherry but I can’t remember much more.

1. If elected what do you intend to do for students? Discount bus fares for tertiary students; regular ‘open forum’ meetings at WSU & in Wintec ‘Hub’ with students. 2. Give us your best “when I was a student” story. When I was a student I edited our Uni paper ‘Empire Times’, and was earlier President of the student union – Flinders Uni in Adelaide, plus I was arrested for protesting against the Vietnam War.

3. Fluoride? Yes / No / It’s complicated. I believe we should provide clean drinking water and not use a basic human right to mass medicate, so no fluoride or whatever else someone says is good for us.

3. Fluoride? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Opposed to fluoride in the water supply; support it being applied topically (directly) to the teeth, especially for young kids; supported the referendum, as at the end of the day it is my personal choice and we should not decide it for the community.

4. Keeping open public libraries? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Yes

4. Keeping open public libraries? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Yes.

5. And municipal swimming pools? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Yes

5. And municipal swimming pools? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Yes in the same or similar place, but it may not be the same pool, if finances don’t stack up.

6. Should I be able to get free buses to the rugby? Yes / No / It’s complicated. It’s complicated! 7. Is that more important than a free bus service to ensure intoxicated students make it home safely? I thought students had no money. If you can afford to get drunk, surely you can afford to pay your bus fare. I had to. 8. If elected, what would you do to help students who are living in substandard flats and locked in to twelve month fixed term contracts? Tell me about them.

6. Should I be able to get free buses to the rugby? Yes / No / It’s complicated. Bus fare should be built into the ticket price by the Rugby union, who then fund the bus travel. 7. Is that more important than a free bus service to ensure intoxicated students make it home safely? No, but different – both important. 8. If elected, what would you do to help students who are living in substandard flats and locked in to twelve month fixed term contracts? Work with my ‘friends’ in the Property Council to find solution to contract length, and ensure DHB and Council health inspectors assess flats for health risks, and require remedial action. 25


President’s Column Annual Report.

At has been both a privilege and a challenge to serve as your Waikato Students’ Union President in 2013. The WSU means many different things to different people. To most we are the organisers of O’week, the producers of Nexus Magazine, or the coordinators of clubs. However to others we are the last line of support when you hit rock bottom - a safety net that stops you falling through the cracks when you can’t pay your bills, there is no food in the pantry or the University is giving you a raw deal. None of these functions is more important than the others, as they contribute to the unique student experience that we are delivering. The key to our success is balance. While 2012 was undeniably a year of change for the organisation, 2013 has been a year of consolidation. We have adapted to the expectation of doing more with less, and simply

Veeps Annual Report.

It has been an absolute privilege to serve you as Vice-President of the Waikato Students’ Union this year. In 2012 the WSU had to make some big changes, which meant that a lot of the board’s time was spent doing behind-the-scenes work; beginning to set the foundation for future years in this new environment. This year we have had more of an opportunity to develop both our commercial and student relationships. 2013 has been largely focused on student consultation and working out the best ways to communicate with you. We have set up and begun to use our WSU mailing list, used facebook more consistently, conducted a very successful student survey and connected with many students through our Level Zero room in the Student Centre. Our surveys were completed by over 400


got on with the job at hand. This has seen our core services delivered to the highest possible standard, and allowed us to explore some exciting possibilities that I believe will lay a strong foundation for the organisation’s future. I am proud of the 2013 Board of Directors who have recognised where the organisation needs to be in the next five years. They have ensured this by delivering the strategic plan, annual plan and budget that will take us there. I commend the board for their diligence while working through the finer details of the proposed sale of shares in U Leisure as outlined in our Annual Plan, and for the hard line they have taken when determining whether students are receiving value for money from organisations such as NZUSA. They have shown a lot of courage in continuing forward with difficult but necessary changes.

President Danyell Summers for her hard work, dedication and support on a daily basis, and my Vice President Maori Te Wairere Ngaia. Te Wairere made great strides in building valuable relationships with our Maori community culminating in the hosting of Te Huinga Tauira in partnership with Te Waiora in August. I would also like to thank our General Manager David West, who I am confident has been recognised this afternoon with a life membership of the organisation, and his team for their tireless efforts in the service of students. I am honoured to have been re-elected for a second term, and I welcome the challenges that 2014 will bring. Aaron Letcher

In particular I would like to thank my Vice

students over a period of about four weeks and have revealed some very interesting information regarding what you think about what we do. We really value this feedback and have used it to shape our Annual Plan for next year and Strategic Plan for the next five years. The Level Zero room has been a great success, particularly since the new furniture and pool table were introduced to the space. It has also been used regularly for both WSU and club events. Everyday throughout the semester we have seen students using that space to get out of the cold, have a hot drink or have some fun with friends. Although this has been a great start to our use of the Level Zero room, we are continuing to work out the logistics of opening hours and how we can better connect with you through that space. I have been so proud of our Board this year. We are a very diverse group and have been made up in a unique way. At the beginning of the year we had two of our elected directors leave the WSU for different reasons, meaning that we had the opportunity to appoint two new directors. This worked in our favour as we now have every faculty in the university represented on the Board. Despite, and

maybe because of, our diversity the Board has meshed together really well and it has been an absolute joy working alongside them. I would particularly like to acknowledge Aaron, who has done so well to lead the Board through some challenging times, always with such dedication and passion and Te Wairere, our Vice-President Maori. This year has been both exciting and challenging and overall character-building. I am so grateful for the experience that I have had as VP this year and I wish Shannon all the best as she moves into the role for 2014. Danyell Summers


Young Citizens Workers Advice Resource Bureau Centre TXT B4 U BUY.

Nah, not rugby union, bro! When I was interviewed for my current role as Educator here at the YWRC, one of the questions I was asked was “do you know what a union is?” I did a lot of umm’ing and ahh’ing and gave a feeble attempt at an answer before realizing that no, I didn’t really know what a union was and the closest thing I could come up with was that I had seen them in the media protesting for and with port workers in early 2012…pretty slack, eh? When I’m out delivering workshops to secondary schools all over the Waikato and Bay of Plenty, I’ll ask a class what a union is and I get the same blank stare that I probably gave when I was asked. A few will pipe up with “rugby union” or “credit union” leaving me to cringe and die a little bit inside. A union is a collective group of people who want to promote the best interests and rights of workers. Unions are able to give workers a voice in the workplace because of the age-old adage that there is power in numbers. There is a union for every occupation and you are able to join a union from the first day you start work. Your boss can’t stop you from joining or treat you unfavourably for joining either. There is a small weekly fee for being in the union, but having heard a story the other day where the union paid for a worker’s lawyer who cost $14,000, it doesn’t seem like much in comparison. For more information on unions check out the Department of Labour site:

Solomon had just bought a car from a private seller, but last week a repossession agent came and took the car because of a debt the previous owner had on the car with a Finance Company. Unfortunately, there is not much Solomon can do except contact the previous owner and ask him to return the cost of the car. What he should have done –would have been to check that there was no record of the car being used as security for a loan. There are various ways to do this – get a pamphlet from the CAB Office. The easiest way is to txt 3463 with the car registration number and VIN number. You will receive a TXT B4 U BUY reply telling you whether the vehicle has a debt against it and you will be given an SMS ID No.; which you can enter on Google –PPSR/ txtb4ubuy – and get details of the loan. Don’t buy someone else’s debt!! Don’t even think about buying a car without texting 3463 The Citizens Advice Bureau has a lot of information on legal issues. They can give you information about this or other inquiries you might have. Visit them at the Village Green by Waikato Print 11am – 1pm, Mon – Fri or phone 0800FORCAB The CAB has free legal clinics on Fridays for pre booked appointments, please email

Ask Amber Exam Stress.

Only a few weeks left till exams people!! Over the last week I have had enquires regarding exam preparation. I like how proactive people are being this year, good on you guys : -) Now there is plenty you can do to make sure you are well prepared for your exams this semester. Firstly, check out your exam dates, times and rooms. Alleviate the stress on the day finding your exam room now, this way you turn up early and you’re prepared, winning! Secondly, take care of your well-being. Get plenty of sleep, eat well and don’t drink so much alcohol. Drunken exam revision doesn’t always plan out how you would think it.. go figure. Thirdly, go through your paper outline and look at the subjects you have studied this semester. Not feeling confident on a couple subjects? Then use before/after class and lecturer office hours to ask them about it. Why not, I am sure they won’t bite (not to be held against me if otherwise happens.) Fourthly, got friendlies in your paper? Why not make a study group! Fifthly, don’t have friendlies in the class and generally just don’t like people that much? Then go talk to Student Learning, Subject Librarians, look up past examination papers and attend all preparation classes your lecturers hold - these are very important! Having trouble finding these contact details or would like some help with something regarding upcoming examination, then flick me a text on 027 2065 011 or Amber the Advocate



Nom Nom Nom Indian Butter Chicken

Good morning, (or afternoon depending on whether you’ve slept through your morning lectures). Ok, I decided to branch out and attempt an Indian dish, and what better way to start than with Butter Chicken.



2 Chicken Breasts (diced) 1-2 Tbs Butter 2 tsp Garam Masala 2 tsp Paprika 1 tsp Ginger 2 tsp Coriander 1 Cinnamon quill 3 Cardamom pods (optional) 400g Tomato Puree 1 Tbs Brown Sugar 1/4 cup Yoghurt (plain and unsweetened) 300 ml of Cream or Coconut Cream Juice of 1 Lemon Salt and Pepper Fresh Coriander to garnish

1. Hot pan, oil and then fry your tender, soft, smooth‌ chicken breasts. Remove once cooked through. 2. Butter into same pan, followed by spices and ginger. Let the butter bubble with all the spices, your house should smell prreeeeetty good at this point. 3. Add tomato puree, sugar, yoghurt and cream. Stir, and set to simmer for 10 mins. 4. Add chicken into sauce, juice of a lemon, salt and pepper to season. 5. Serve with rice and naan bread, or whatevs. Sprinkle some fresh coriander overtop. Voila.


Once again, if you guys get stuck or want something other to do than listen to your lecturer, float over to my facebook page or Youtube channel and have a gander. Till next time, Alavidha.


Auteur The best of Woody Allen.

Woody Allen’s latest film is playing at Lido cinema. Blue Jasmine has been extremely well received. After 47 years as a writer/ director and occasional star, Allen proves himself capable of genuine artistic growth, producing a drama that has more in common with Tennessee Williams’ immortal classic A Streetcar Named Desire than anything previously seen in his own oeuvre. If Cate Blanchett isn’t a serious Oscar candidate come awards season it will be an outrage. Auteur House proudly stocks every one of Allen’s previous 45 features. Any filmmaker who averages one movie a year for almost half a century will fail on occasion and all but Allen completists are advised to avoid the likes of September, Anything Else or last year’s To Rome With Love. However, on balance Allen has been remarkably consistent. Fans differ on which of Woody’s films are the best. Here’s my attempt at an Allen ‘top eight’ list: 1. The Purple Rose of Cairo (1985). A perfect blend of whimsical fantasy and depression era drama. An abused 1930s woman who finds solace in the cinema is romanced by a movie hero who walks off the screen and into ‘real life’. Has Allen’s most perfectly realised, bittersweet conclusion. 2. Manhattan (1979). A black and white ode to New York, the stunningly romantic images and use of Gershwin music cast a considerable spell, though Woody never loses sight of the fact that love is fleeting and life disappointing. Another great ending.

3. Crimes and Misdemeanors (1989). A masterful balance of the light and the dark, this drama with wit addresses serious moral questions whilst remaining consistently entertaining. Martin Landau is a rich man who disposes of a problematic mistress then suffers no more than residual guilt. 4. Zelig (1983). As much for its technical innovation as its philosophic insights, Zelig was compared to Citizen Kane when first released. A brilliant mockumentary, it comments on the human need for social conformity, its insecure title character a magic metamorph who literally blends into his environment. 5. Stardust Memories (1980). Allen’s version of Fellini’s 8 1/2, full of ugly faces and distorted images. The least appreciated of Woody’s masterpieces, his most visually complex and bitter work. 6. Bullets Over Broadway (1994). After a lean period in the early 1990s Allen bounced back with this atmospheric black comedy about the theatre. A wonderful evocation of time and place, the potentially cliched characters - an earnest, aspiring writer, an acting diva and some comic book gangsters and molls - are brought to hilarious life by a typically great ensemble cast. 7. Annie Hall (1977). Every Allen fan can agree on this one. The film that set a new standard for romantic comedy in American cinema, a witty reflection on the writer/director’s real life affair with co-star Diane Keaton. 8. Match Point (2005). The key transitional film in Allen’s late career shift from New York wit to European auteur. A British drama of murder and its consequences, exploring the same thematic territory as Crimes and Misdemeanors. Richard Swainson

Google This Ever wondered what words you can use on TV?.

Ishin-Denshin by Disney Research ishin-den-shin/ Ishin-Den-Shin is an interactive installation which consists of a microphone that can record sounds and transmit them through touch. The recorded sound becomes audible only when touching someone’s ear. Secrets, messages and whispers can then be transmitted from person to person in physical contact with each others. Coder for Raspberry Pi Coder is an experiment for Raspberry Pi, built by a small team of Googlers in New York. It’s a free piece of software that turns a Raspberry Pi into a simple, tiny, personal web server and web-based development environment. Ingenious Bathroom Graffiti ingenious-bathroom-graffiti Hamilton’s public toilets haven’t got anything on this. What Not To Swear: The Acceptability of Words in Broadcasting Acceptibility_of_Words_2013_WEB.pdf The Broadcasting Standards Authority has just released its new list of “unacceptable swear words” for New Zealand broadcasting (television, radio and films). ‘Cunt’ tops the list again! 29


Little Beer Corner Beer Advertising.

There was a time where I thought beer advertising in New Zealand was really clever. I thought that a visitor to the land of the long white cloud would stumble upon a Speight’s TV commercial or a Tui billboard and think that we were quite a clever bunch. Humorous, witty, inventive even. Now I’m not so sure. For my ten cents there is something key missing from most of our beer marketing, it’s not actually about beer. I know I’m making some sweeping generalizations but I’ll ask for a little scope to try and make my point. Toothpaste ads are about toothpaste and nice shiny teeth and fighting decay. Car ads are about new cars with gadgets and good fuel economy. What are beer ads about? My first memorable TV ad about beer was probably a DB Draught ad involving some Clydesdale horses. Some dude was working hard dragging a tree up a hill or something and at the end of the day he had a glass of brown frothy stuff. The Speight’s southern man entered the picture over ten years ago and he was a staunch fucker who worked hard and liked those around him to do the same. Pity the jaffa that tried to welch out of an honest day’s labour. In the 90’s when Tui billboards were unveiled they were somewhat groundbreaking in their ‘take the piss out of everything’ nature. In my opinion the missing link in all of these ideas is that they just aren’t about beer. Nowadays as punters become more discerning about the drop they drink I’d like to see more marketing taking a look at the beer itself. What it tastes like. Where it’s made. Stuff like that. Disclaimer: There is one set of ads floating around at the moment featuring Al Brown talking about the flavour of some (Lion made) beers and how they match well with food. Marketing nerds would call this category development advertising and if Lion’s paying for them I guess it’s only fair that they only feature their own beers.

Religiousity Al Salamu Alaykum.

Islam is one of the most fastest growing religions in the world. Personally, I was born Muslim and I thank God everyday for this blessing because living in todays world and with media corrupting and spreading lies about Islam all the time, I’d imagine it is pretty tough for people to get that prejudice and biased view out of their minds. However, even if I was born a Muslim, the understanding of Islam between you and I is exactly the same…knowledge of Islam didn’t miraculously appear in my mind, no, as I grew up I studied Islam for myself and took Islamic studies as a class for four years. You see, to me Islam isn’t just a religion, it’s a lifestyle. Allah (God) made all things that are harmful to us prohibited because He cares about His creations. For instance, yes, alcohol, pork, lying, eavesdropping, slandering, stealing, gambling, consumption of drugs and many more completely forbidden to us because they cause immense harm. Some claim that alcohol does benefit you, and there is a verse from the Holy Quran (which hasn’t been changed for over a thousand years): “They ask you about intoxicants and games of chance. Say: In both of them there is a great sin and means of profit for men, and their sin is greater than their profit.” - Surat Al Baqarah 2:219 So Allah the All Merciful forbids anything that causes harm more than its benefit. There are five pillars of Islam that as a Muslim you have to follow: Shahada - Declaration of the Oneness of Allah. Salat (Prayer) the worshipping of Allah five times a day. Fasting - In the month of Ramadan from

sunrise to sunset and staying away from evil actions. Zakaat - A form of charity. And Hajj Pilgrimage in the Holy City of Makkah. A topic I’d really like to talk about as a Muslim Woman, is the HIJAB (Headscarf). I myself wear the Hijab and love it. I decided to wear it just last year because I became fully convinced of the reasons for the hijab and found myself overcome with happiness when I stepped outside the house with pride with that piece of cloth covering and dressing so modestly. It was my liberation... not oppression. I have had people ask me about the hijab and feel amazed at the fact that its a source of pride. Us Muslim women who wear the headscarf, honor it, cherish it and love it. I can go on to tell you what the rights of women in Islam are, but I have a word limit and more to cover about this beautiful religion, so on to the next. Despite what many people think: (and I am very surprised when I speak to people and find this out) we do believe in Jesus - Peace and blessings be Upon him -as a Prophet. It’s not like we completely deny the existence of Jesus PBUH, we love him, he is our Prophet and we respect all our Prophets. Prophets we also believe in include: Adam, Idrish, Noah, Ibrahim, Lut, Ishmael, Moses, David, Solomon, Isa (Jesus) and the last Prophet sent to us, Mohammed, may Allah’s blessings be upon them all. I felt like I needed to add this because it’s astonishing how so many people think we deny these Prophets. For more information on Islam I suggest you guys look up these cool people on youtube: lebo2196 (maybe start with ‘Why I hate religion but love Jesus- Muslim Version’) and Nouman Ali Khan. Or ask a Muslim on campus, we don’t bite, I love everyone and love it even more when people talk to me and ask me about my religion - Islam Allahu Akbar ! Yours in Peace and Justice, Shaymaa M Arif.


Campus Style



Take another element of social media; the selfie culture. People, especially women, who post a large number of selfies are considered “attention seeking”. Women are constantly told through media and society that their looks are their most important quality, yet when they are in control of their own image and choose to be proud of it, they’re considered vapid and self obsessed. The notion that we only deserve attention or are worth anything when we are valuable to society (whether it is through our looks or our intelligence) is undermined by selfie culture and the idea of the humble-brag.

Louise vs The World Louise vs the humble-brag.

Some days it’s a struggle for me to get out of bed, let alone go to university and complete assignments. Surely I am a worthwhile human being whether I get out of bed or not? And if I do get out of bed, and finish my assignments, and pass surely I should be able to be proud of that fact? I shouldn’t be forced to qualify it with a humble-brag alert or not talk about it at all, lest I make someone else feel inadequate.

There’s a word I’ve been hearing a lot lately. Not ‘YOLO’, not ‘Miley’; a word that I think is an insult in disguise. It might be two words, it might be one word. I don’t care. This word is ‘humble-brag’. Its relative popularity seems to have come from one place; Facebook. Facebook and I aren’t on good terms for a number of reasons (you try running two businesses through there, it’s the stuff of nightmares), but it does have some practical aspects. Those aspects include keeping in touch with a large number of people, at the press of a button. Most people don’t want you to know they’re a week behind in their rent, or they’re really struggling with the fact their Grandma is sick. However, sharing that they got all A’s last semester (or even just passed) is something a lot of people want to share. But posting positive things, often ones you’ve worked really hard for, end up with comments like “...I see you’ve mastered the art of the humble-brag”. A friend of mine on Facebook recently finished their Master’s thesis, but started the post with “humble-brag alert”. I’ve seen first-hand the mental and emotional torment a Master’s degree has on people, as several of my friends have gone through the torture. Yet, they couldn’t post that they had finally knocked the bastard off without expecting people to subtly cut them down to size. Why can’t we just be supportive and happy for the people around us, especially when they’ve worked hard and deserve the fruits of their labour?


Making Living Cheaper Scab off your rich mates’ parents.

Hello Friends, This week’s tip for making living cheaper is to scab off your rich mates parents. A clever way to save money is to befriend people who are flatting at home with their rich parents. Get into the house, be polite and always try being around for dinner. If they’re rich they’re not going to care about serving up an extra meal (unless they’re real miserable bastards). A good start is to befriend former students from St Peter’s and St Paul’s. You could

possibly do this by striking up a conversation about past school sport matches or something (“Hey aren’t you the winger for???… we played you guys”). St Peter’s and St Paul’s are decile 9 schools (highly affluent), which means their alumni’s parents can probably afford to feed you. Avoid being mates with students who went to Fairfield College or Melville High. If a person from Fairfield or Melville tries to befriend you tell them in no uncertain terms to piss off (they’re no good to you). After you’ve gained the parents’ trust start subtly trying to get them to lend you money. When they ask you the inevitable generic question of, “how are your studies and flat going?” it’s your opportunity to give them a sob story (try targeting mums, they’re more caring). Say something like, “yeah it’s ok but I’m just finding it real stressful with study and work” (just lie about having a job if you don’t have one). Then bleed your heart out about how Studylink’s been a real prick to deal with and how you got a fine the other day for having no warrant or rego. If you do your job right they’ll take pity on you and hopefully offer to lend you some cash. If you can turn on the waterworks (looking at you girls) then use this to your advantage as well. Make sure you use some reverse psychology when they offer to help you. “No ‘Mrs. Rich’, I couldn’t get you to pay for my warrant and rego” etc, etc. Hopefully they will see how upset you are and insist on helping you out. Make sure you keep up the “I’m a good person” charade by thanking them emphatically. Try getting a $100 loan (you can up it later). When you get that $100 the first thing you should do is head down to your local bottle shop and load up on some cheap as piss (I suggest a box of Double Browns for around $20) and celebrate a days scabbing well done. A box of beers always tastes a lot better when it’s some other suckers money that’s paid for it. After that box of beers, head into town and spend the rest of your mate’s parents coin on backdrafts and lap dances. If you can live with using people then take this advice. Remember (as Honest Matt always says) at the end of the day it’s all about looking out for number one. Matt Hicks


Arts Anna Cunningham A visual artist with musical talents, in her spare time Anna writes music for and performs in local Hamilton band Kisstheskies, and creates one-off paintings and sketches. Her style is contemporary/abstract with a focus on bright colours and experimental themes. “I like to leave the paintings looking slightly unfinished, I love the wild, untamed free flowing look with bold splashes of colour.� Each piece of work is an affordably priced original, aimed at reaching all walks of art lovers with a piece that is unique to them. You can find Anna at and reach the band Kisstheskies at trykisstheskies



Blazed & Confused New columnist Mr. Whippy says don’t be that guy.

forced to do anything by peer pressure. On the other hand, don’t try peer pressure your friends out of something either; you feel bad, your friends feel bad, it’s a lame buzz for everyone. As cliché as it sounds, just chill. Cheers for reading and I’ll “check you later man.” Yours With All my Heart Mr Whippy x

can’t talk and should shut your face before someone puts a fist in it (see: consistently getting treated like shit by guys you’ve been warned about). However, if you’ve made a mistake and learnt from it, like a good little human, then get all judgy as hell. Tell your friend how you stuffed up and what you would’ve done differently – it shows humility and empathy.

Well... where do I start? I guess the title says it all. Let me first state that when it comes to this subject I’m more of an aficionado than a connoisseur. In fact, before I moved to Uni, I was the king of resisting peer pressure. Some called me straight edge, others a pussy, but I think the worst and most often repeated title I was ever given is ‘pretentious c*#t.’ This stemmed mainly from my continual judgement of friends who dabbled in the less desirable activities of narcotics and who also had an inability to locate any of their motivation. What I’ve learned this year is to be a bit more open minded, you don’t have to spoon feed yourself a bowl of pingas every weekend, go to static on a Thursday night and hop round to Snead Place Project (one of my inner-circle’s favourite activities). I also advise against being “that guy.” Everyone who has ever been under any influence should know “that guy.” You know the one who holds his hands in front of your face “hey man hey man, how many fingers am I holding up?,” “Can you see rainbows,” “Oh... holding a piece of toast I see, you must have the munchies,” “What was that sound what was that sound? Are you paranoid?” 1) You’re holding up exactly 4 fingers. My reply to you is a single straight up and down finger. I hope that relays the message. 2) I wish I was seeing rainbows because that would be fucking awesome. 3) Yeah I’m hungry. I might bite your big mouth off. 4) I wasn’t paranoid at all but now I am…. Fuck you. I’m still not really sure where I stand on the subject as a whole; the one thing I have learned is that judgement doesn’t solve much. If you choose not to dabble that’s A-OK with me. The way I see it is you should never feel


Guru DJ Another round of sound advice from the DJ who knows best

I friend-zoned a guy ages ago and he’s still pestering me. How should I handle this? The whole concept of ‘friendzone’ is so incredibly pathetic. It’s the by-product of a society that says ‘everyone is special’ and has turned us all into whiny pre-schoolers. We’re not all special. We can’t all get what we want. We are not entitled to everything under the sun. Once upon a time if you told a guy/girl that you don’t like them then they moved on, now guys seem to think that rejection is the first stage of courting and that it is some sort of ‘nice-guy’ initiation. It’s not. If you want to get rid of someone tell them directly to fuck off – don’t sugarcoat it. Don’t say ‘if things were different’. Don’t give them any hope – ‘cause if you do they’ll find their way back. How do I give advice without sounding like a hypocrite and pissing off my friends? That’s simple, don’t be a hypocrite, if you keep making the same mistakes then you really

But before you start snapping your fingers and being all like “yo baby daddy” or some such shit - there is a catch. And it’s a huge catch. If you’re offering advice to a girl who is telling you her problem then she’s just venting and doesn’t want advice. If it’s a guy telling you his problem, it’s because he actually wants input. Guys want help, girls want an ear. No lies. Every. Time. Men would be so much better off if we stopped trying to tell women how to solve their problems – they don’t even listen to each other, so why the hell would they listen to us? I think I accidentally got into a relationship. What do I do? There’s nothing wrong with having a relationship, having the companionship of another person in such an intimate way is an amazing, unrivaled experience. However, if you’ve slipped into one, then it’s your own damn fault. If you didn’t want to be with her you should’ve left before the bed was made. On the bright side, now you know why your mates were giving you shit for that cuddly night in watching The Hangover III with her. If you want to get out of the relationship, you know what to do, just make sure you don’t give them any hope – ‘cause if you do they’ll find their way back.


Mr Minty Fish Lorde liked my picture on instagram, so fuck your good news.

These are some questions in my inbox. Ok cool. Q. Why do women like funny guys? A. Because genuine wit requires intelligence and hearing a joke is faster than asking you to take an IQ test. It’s also a good way to gauge his social awareness. Being ‘funny’ is about reading your audience and appealing to their

Or because you’re sleeping with a sluzz and there’s no easy way for her to tell you that she just blew 3 guys in the carpark behind House. Q. Why do girls use so much makeup (have wild clothes or hairdos) when we like them natural?

 A. Because we don’t wear makeup for you, buy wild clothes for you, or style our hair for you. Also, you’re stupid and go fuck yourselves. Q. Why do girls take forever to txt back? A. Because we’re either analysing what we want to say, we’re at work, we’re dead, or we don’t want the dick. The 1st one is the most likely but ignore “I had no credit”, “I didn’t see your text” or “I thought I’d replied.” Q. Does size really matter? A. In theory, yes. If we think a guy has a big dick but we’re not sure, we will; as a group; obsess over it. In saying that, when it actually

“...nothing beats an “average” lump of genitalia. Nothing that makes us feel like we’re banging a chick but also nothing that shows us what giving birth must feel like.” preferences in a split second. If a guy is funny, it’s a certificate saying he possesses basic social skills. Q. What does she mean when she says “...”? A. This is painfully easy. She either wants you to ask more questions or explain more. Q. Why do girls beg for compliments?

 A. Because we’re needy. Q. Why do women never say what really happened? A. Because we either think you’ll judge us, (for buying more shoes, etc.) or that you won’t understand (why we’re hanging out with that loud friend of ours that you hate, etc.)

comes down to having sex, nothing beats an “average” lump of genitalia. Nothing that makes us feel like we’re banging a chick but also nothing that shows us what giving birth must feel like. Come at me with your questions. I can email a response or blast them publically into the future. I love you all, miss you dearly and think 80% of you are bangably attractive. @mrmintyfish You’re cool. MMF.xx

Diary of a Single Girl Lucky Charm

I’ve never spent much time in the Sky City casino. At first this was because I wasn’t 21 yet and more recently it’s because I’m a poor student who can’t afford to gamble away my food for the week. My second time I went to the casino was very recently and with a guy I had met in town. He was a bit of a high roller, coming from the mines for the weekend in Hamilton, so he had a bit of money to throw at the tables. I’m pretty sure I’m the best lucky charm around because with my choices he went from $80 to $1500 in just two hours! The gentleman offered this to me since it was my choices that had gotten him the money, but being the classy bird that I am I did not want to take it. However, after such an exciting time and

“...because the casino makes you feel like you’re a bit of a sophisticated woman, I did take the $80 taxi into the wilderness to spend the night with him.” because the casino makes you feel like you’re a bit of a sophisticated woman, I did take the $80 taxi into the wilderness to spend the night with him. I’m kinda glad I didn’t take the money when I think back on it. But goddamn I would’ve been a really well paid shag! 35


Was This You? Gay Day Out.


SHIT you This week we visit Latin America (sort of), learn to take quality photographs (maybe), and appreciate some vinyl and whisky (hopefully). Stuck for things to do? Check out Shit You Can Do.

Monday 23 September rd

Waikato DHB & Waikato Regional Council Meeting, Café Agora 10 am – 11:45 am A brief presentation by the candidates is in store for you along a chance to ask those burning questions you’ve been wanting to about the issues that matter. There is a $5 cover charge to cover some refreshments and a donation to Café Agora’s charity of the month. Digital Photography Group, Scots Presbyterian Church 7:30-9:45 pm Calling all photographers! The Digital Photography Group helps beginners and budding photographers with skills and techniques. Other activities of the night include workshops on various photography topics or sessions with guest speakers. $5 admission. For inquiries, contact Rose 0274496712. Big Muffin Serious, Waikato Museum 10 am – 4:30 pm A bit of inside info for you guys: there is no muffin involved. However, The Big Muffin Serious Band is a rockstar in the world of ukulele. This exhibition shows us exactly why.

Tuesday 24th September

Dessert not you thing? Well you’re in luck. I’ve always known that Victoria St holds so many gems but this one just takes it in a whole new level. Tuesdays are your days if you like mains with a side order of another main!

Wednesday 25th September Skint Student Night, House 6 pm onwards Stressed out form all the assignments that you have yet to submit (read: do)? Why don’t you take some time out for yourself and enjoy a pizza for $5? Might want to hold off on the drink deals if you’re working on an assignment, though. Wax on Wednesdays, Static 8 pm onwards The only place in town where you can hear some good ol’ vinyl on a Wednesday, and have a yarn with your pals while you “check in” on Facebook and show the online world just how much fun you’re having!

Thursday 26th September Thomas Oliver – Beneath The Weissenborn Album Tour, Biddy Mulligans 8:30-11:00 pm Thomas Oliver is an artist that has seemingly done it all- performed with the likes of Eric Clapton, Tom Jones, and Fat Freddy’s Drop? Sure. A vocalist in the colorful world of Drum&Bass? Check. Oliver has collaborated with some D&B legends like Concord Dawn, Black Sun Empire, Trei, and State of Mind. Now he’s releasing the world’s first full-length all instrumental album and I cannot be more intrigued.

Sweet Tooth Tuesday, Iguana Technically speaking, I can order a dessert to dine in and another one for takeaway for only $12. It’s ok, you can stop giving me those judging looks now.

2 for 1 Mains, Agenda

Arthur Guinness Day, The Cook Arthur Guinness Day – a celebration of music and the great stout of Ireland. If there’s one thing we all know for sure, it’s that the Irish know how to celebrate. We may be living in Hamilton but boy do we know how to party!

12th Latin American Film Festival 2013, Waikato Uni S1.02 The first of its kind in Hamilton, the first film to be screened is Uruguay film Mal Dia Para Pesca (Bad Day to go Fishing), which follows the story of Jacob –formerly known as the strongest man on earth and now washed up alcoholic, and his crafty manager Orsini. Together this duo makes good money staging bogus wrestling matches in small South African towns. However, this adventure only begins when they reach the unassuming village of Santa Maria. We can only guess what happens from then on. Looks like this film will make for an interesting movie night. Free entry.

Friday 27th September Crossroads Duo, Speight’s Ale House Easy listening music from 5-11 pm. It’s a Friday, you had a hard week, and what better way to usher in the weekend than by special food, a few beersies, and some downright good live music? Plains – Presented by The Remote Fiction Theatre, Riverlea Theatre 8:00 pm The play is set in a soon-to-be-apocalyptic near future and follows the morally questionable Satchel and six other survivors of the beginning of the end as they prepare for the END. Described as “dark, wry, cynical, and often simply absurd”, this is a play that Hamilton has never seen before.

Saturday 28th September Night Train Rides, Minogue Park 6:30-9:00 pm “She took the midnight train going anywhere” as that popular Journey song goes. This train ride, however, is different. Once a year, the night train ride happens. The Blind Foundation will be benefiting from this event this year. Basically you get to ride a little train through tunnels, over bridges, and through bushes all in the dark. If that’s not adventurous enough for you then I don’t know how to please you anymore.

For all your gigs and gigging needs: gigs@


Nexus, Issue 22, 2013  
Nexus, Issue 22, 2013