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11 August 2008

Into It: The Hamilton Drum and Bass scene

FEATURES Editor: Joshua Drummond ( Design: Talia Kingi ( Advertising: Tony Arkell ( 176 6180) Assistant to the Editor: Andrew Neal (

18 Emma Swete examines the Hamilton Drum n Bass scene, and interviews DnB maestro Tiki Tane. No, she doesn’t ask who is always on his mind, so don’t even bother.

Music Ed: Carl Watkins ( Books Ed: Kelly Badman Film Ed: Art Focker

Contributors Emma Swete, 8 Ball, AJ, Vitamin C, WSU, Carl Watkins, Chris Parnell, Burton C. Bogan, Nick Sicklemore, Simon Houlton, Dawn Tuffery, Kelly Badman, Jed Laundry, Dr Richard Swainson, Josh, Andrew, Talia, Matt, Grant Burns, Mammoth, HCAC, Flash Medallion, Art Focker, Louise


8 – 13 Webcam woes, some jargon-heavy management crap, ooh! Election party! Research scholarships, Iwinterns, Hidden Debt, Execution, Vault, Don’t Fuck with the Po-lice (report), and the Nexus Haiku News

Blackstock, Megan Balks, Mahafrin Variava, Teresa Hattan, Kirril, Blair Munro

Nexus is a member of the Aotearoa Student Press Association (ASPA) Because that end of year piss-up is looking better and better…


WANT TO ADVERSTISE WITH NEXUS? EMAIL OR OR call 07 838 4653 OR 021 176 6180

NEXUS IS LOCATED AT Ground Floor, Student Union Building, Gate One, University of Waikato, Knighton Road, Hamilton

PHONE: 07 838 4653 FAX: 07 838 4588 EMAIL: POSTAL: Private Bag 3059, Hamilton

REGULARS AND RANDOMS 02 < 03 Editorial 04 Caption Competition 04 Karn 05 Low Five 07 Spark Wrap-up 14 Lettuce (Can’t type now, just got Burger Fuel. Nom nom nom.) (Back.) 16 Garfield Minus Garfield 17 Religion Soapbox 24-27 WSU 28 FM’s Puzzle Page of ______________________ 29 Notices 30 Sports Thoughts 30 Procrastinatio di Procrastinatio 31 Agony Art 31 Blair Munro’s tabulated screechings 32 Boganology 101 32 The Nerdary 33 A River Runs Through It 33 Moving Pictures 34 Book Reviews 34 The Spotlight 35 The Phat Controller 36 Movie Previews (or something) 37 Citric 37 Lectern 38 Gigs 39 DETSUB

I got a quite a few bites about my “Hamilton is a dripping shit-sponge of a city”-themed editorial last week. Way more than I’d expected. The majority of people seemed to agree, but there were a few who defended the town – “Hamilton is a great little city,” said one. So, to those people – I completely (and, possibly, confusingly) agree with you. Hamilton is a great little city. It’s also a dripping shit-sponge, as is every other city on earth, at times and in places. The point I wanted to make is that because there is much here that is munter and grey and depressing, the sterling efforts of our artists, musicians, and general creative-types are thrown

into sharp relief. I’d like to see more support for them, from the Powers That Be, and I’m sure they would too. Anyway, that’s not what I wanted to talk about this time. In fact, I don’t want to talk at all. This time I’m putting a bit of the Hamilton I see every day in the magazine. The bits that are beautiful, inspiring, interesting, creative, or whatever. That’s all. If you have any photos along similar lines you’d like to see in Nexus, please email them to us at We’d love to have them.

BEGINS Minimalist caption competition. Many entries. Many good. Winner last week: “17, busty blond…” Sent in by Lily Good.

“Snoop had technology on lock-down, using FaceBook to keep an eye on his bitches.” Some One Who Would Maybe Have Won If They’d Included Their Name, Which You Have To Do. “Man, for an old bitch, that Lassie’s hot!” Mark “17, busty blond…”

Also good but not quite as:

This week’s picture: Send entries to nexus@ or 021 235 8436 Winner gets Burger Fuel voucher ENDS

English this week. I’m pumped, amped, and some would say gagging! Y? Someone had a par-tay, therefore, AJ can review it for the kolumn. It has been too long but baby I’m back, just like the biff is. The occasion was Mr. Haven’s (23rd) and some little hobbit called Ben’s (26th!!) bday bash and it was one hell of a house party. The term ‘house party’ is ol’ skool and is rare these days but the natives at 115 Nixon St. certainly showed all the peps the outright definition accompanied with an excellent example of a ‘house party’. Ben showed his age and experience by knocking together a stage within an hour IN THE LOUNGE which later that night was donned by ‘Pony Island’, a live fricken band! There was moshing and mashing, and there was Haven, who should be going to the Olympico for his stage diving efforts, epic son. The highlight in more ways than one was without a shadow of a doubt Pemberton, who almost lost his brows from some pyrotechnics involving a diesel can and a BMX bicycle. Birthday boy number 1 (Haven) wore a gorgeous Mighty Boosh tundra boy suit which could have been mistaken for the cat in the hat, sorry Ben but he owned you in the best dressed (even though Haven was the only one to do so). All in all and all in one, twas a massively gay (happy gay) night and as a bonus no negative externalities except for a couple of singed eyebrows. I have had some correspondence back about the retaliation of a recent flat war. Both parties will remain anonymous in-case of events and 4

actions in the near future. Flat A has taken things to a new world record of flat prankings. A couple of weekends ago flat B’s humble abode was rocked with flat A’s wrath and brute force. I apologise in advance for the following if you are offended. Flat A planted a dead sheep on the living room couch, a pig’s head in the 10kg rice bag, and excrement in a pot plant and one behind the stove. Also to note is that the sheep was cut open with its insides protruding onto the couch and floor. Yum! Updates will be kept documented in the kolumn and I am taking no sides whatsoever. Aids

1. Should people be allowed to drink in lectures? 2. What was your favourite part of the Dark Knight? 3. What do you do when the weather is shit? 4. What’s the most embarrassing place you’ve ever fallen asleep? 5. What’s the worst thing StudyLink has ever done to you?


Big Daddy




Speakers bring everything to Spark 08 By Teresa Hattan

From interior designers to typographers, film directors to photographers, Spark had it all in 2008. It isn’t really surprising when you realise that the media arts festival has now been running for 10 years. I’ve been involved with Spark since April of this year, when Amanda Gray and I were appointed as interns. This involved countless hours researching artists who were on the programme, and writing bibliographies for said speakers. As interns we also started our own blog; www.sparkinterns.wordpress. com, which was an interesting experience. This also gave us the opportunity to learn about blogging, whilst also relaying to our audience what we were up to. This gave a different voice, a different side to Spark, which hasn’t been done before. I think it has worked out quite well, as we have received good feedback about our website. As for how the festival itself turned out. Well, if students coming away from a presentation going “Wow! That was great. I learnt...” then I think Spark has achieved its goal. As a festival, Spark aimed to enlighten and give inspiration to its participants in a variety of different areas.

This year we had 18 amazing speakers, all with a wide array of talents. Every single one of these speakers inspired students and members of the public alike with their presentations. The wide range of fringe events has also been a benefit to Spark this year. With the opening of “Close Up” at Ramp Gallery on Monday night and Palestinian Days Film Festival on Wednesday night there have definitely been lots to keep all the artsy people interested. Thursday night also offered something new and exciting to Hamilton, with the first Hamilton-based Pecha Kucha evening. This is an event that promotes interaction and discovery in many creative fields. All kinds of art practitioners got the chance to meet those in a similar field, and had the opportunity to show what they were made of. This was definitely a highlight of the festival. Overall, Spark this year has been spectacular. The calibre of the speakers at Spark 08 has been incredible. If you preferred to stay in bed all week, then you sure missed an unforgettable experience. The ideas and the knowledge I have gained from this festival have been amazing. I can only suggest one thing to those that missed it - do not miss it next year! If Spark 08 is anything to go by, Spark 09 will blow your mind! 


August 11 2008


Computer tracing software set back by “legal issues” Just put it on BitTorrent, why don’t you? By Andrew Neal

Legal issues have slowed the development of computer anti-theft software developed at the University of Waikato.


The software, called “Kaitiaki” (Guardian) is apparently similar to software developed overseas, which could cause “legal problems,” according to Waikato University’s commercial arm, WaikatoLink “We need to make sure that we’re not doing something that will get us in trouble overseas,” says Duncan Mackintosh, Commercial Manager of WaikatoLink Ltd. Once installed, the software can trace the whereabouts of the computer up to 100m and even take images of the thief to be used as evidence. The project was began at the start of the year and was instrumental in the return of two laptops. It is now being used by a number of staff at Waikato University, but has not seen any progress since March, when it was processed through WaikatoLink Ltd. for commercialisation.


Student Marketer of the Year

“Their lawyers are determining how marketable and how copyrightable the [the software] is,” says Paul Cowan, who was involved in Kaitiaki’s development.

- Student - Winner of Student Marketer of the Year - Employed at a dream company


StudenT Marketer of the Year

- Student - Graduate - 1st interview

- 2nd interview

- Working for free - 2nd job to pay rent - Live off canned food

Despite setbacks and legal issues Cowan says “the project is definitely not dead.”

- Still working for free - Move back home - Go on the dole - Checkout operator

Developers say their plan was for the software to be used in schools where computers are regularly stolen.

- Move onto friends couch - Start drinking - Busk for money - Hospitalised for malnutrition - Cleaner at a top company

Kaitiaki was not an original idea with developers saying similar projects had been in existence since 2001, but developments by the Waikato staff are new, causing the legal issues. “We are investigating where it will go, as there are similar patents overseas,” says Mackintosh.

- Intern at a top company - Employed at a dream company

Be ahead of the rest.

Developers are obviously disappointed in the halt of progress and are concerned by a lack of updates about how the commercialisation process is going.

Email jo.murphy@nz for a copy of the Student Marketer of the Year brief, terms and conditions, then design your winning marketing strategy.


“We just haven’t really heard anything about its progress,” says Cowan. Mail Marketing Centre


MMS 0017 Student Market_Nexus.in1 1

4/8/08 1:58:01 PM

Management school “restructuring” Look, they use their own jargon! By Andrew Neal

Waikato University’s management school is undergoing a restructuring “aimed at improving connections with University Executives.” “There have been several parts that we are always trying to do better in,” said Management School Dean Frank Scrimgeour. The changes will see the management school administration divided up into four specific areas or ‘pillars’ of organisation.

The event is part of the “Let’s Be Loud” campaign – a joint venture between New Zealand University Students Association and the New Zealand Electoral office – to get students enrolled to vote. “Apparently, only one out of four students are actually enrolled to vote,” says WSU Vice President Olivia Beattie.

Alison Robertson and Angie Knox who both previously worked in the management school media relations department are working in the

“We had too many people reporting to the dean. What is needed is direct reporting from each area,” said Scrimgeour.

The downsizing of the management schools public relations department will see more outsourcing to the University’s PR department.

The management school has said they are centralising their structure, which is meant to

“We have made changes on a principle of wanting to work closer with the University’s executive,” said Scrimgeour.

By Andrew Neal

Students will have to enrol to vote or be already enrolled to enter the party.

The former Director of Public Relations for the Management School, Sarah Knox, is now working in the Vice Chancellors Office.

University Communication team.

It’s an enrol-to-vote party, actually. Sorry.

The event will be held downstairs in the WSU building between 3 and 6pm and will feature free food, wine, beer and music.

This has seen three employees moved to other departments within the University.

These pillars – comprising of research, education, enterprise and academic - will have an Associate Dean or University board member that reports directly to the Dean.


Students can enjoy a brew and get their vote sorted this Thursday at the Waikato Students Union’s (WSU) enrolment party.

make administration more streamlined and cost effective.

A competition is being run between NZUSA members to see which tertiary institution can get the most enrolments - the prize for which is a mystery. WSU directors will also be roaming the Waikato campus all week signing people up to the electoral roll. “Not only are we helping students avoid a fine, but we’re throwing them a party too,” says Beattie.

“We wanted to enhance effectiveness and reduce costs,” said Scimgreour.

Oi! En


A DJ will be present at the party to keep music flowing throughout the evening. “It’s a chance for students to chill out and relax, have a drink and enrol. Which they have to do anyway,” concludes Beattie. The “Lets Be Loud” initiative runs throughout the month of August. 9

Dozens of research projects on offer at Waikato University Examining teeth to work out which region preserved Maori heads came from, and developing an online digital museum for Niue are just two of more than 60 summer research scholarships on offer at the University of Waikato. The 10-week, $4000 research scholarships, which aim to show students the challenges and rewards of research, are open to anyone who has spent the 2008 year at a university in New Zealand or Australia. The scheme began just two years ago with about 25 scholarships and has ballooned into the university offering 62 research scholarships this coming summer. The topics have been chosen by University of Waikato staff and are often part of larger pieces of research they are undertaking.

The university sees the scholarships as a way to showcase its research capabilities to students from other organisations, and as an excellent way to encourage promising undergraduate, final-year honours or first-year masters students into research. On top of the $4000 scholarship, students from outside the Waikato who win a research project can get financial help for travel and accommodation.

Research topics available include finding out why farmers’ markets are working in local communities, a look at ICT in the thoroughbred and kiwifruit industries, looking at the intestinal tract of the huhu grub, developing molecular barcoding for New Zealand falcons, and studying how small and medium businesses deal with Generation Y staff.

Applications for the scholarships close at the end of August for computing, science and engineering topics, and at the end of September for others. For more information: research/scholarships

A new internship initiative between the University of Waikato and the Te Ropu Manukura iwi collective has been launched with the aim of building research connections.

The internships are designed to give Waikato students valuable work experience and strengthens their iwi networks while also providing the iwi organisations with valuable research support.

“The internship is about connecting students enrolled at Waikato to their iwi and allowing them to undertake research in an iwi context” reported the University Pro Vice-Chancellor Maori office.

The project was confirmed late last year by the Vice Chancellor’s office.

Interns must be enrolled at the University of Waikato and are matched with iwi to which they affiliate.

Research areas include Treaty of Waitangi/CNI Research (Raukawa, Tuwharetoa, Turanganui, Whanganui), the digitisation of iwi knowledge (Hauraki), alternative education models for Maori (Kahungunu), building on papakainga (Tauranga), strengthening whaikorero (Whakatohea), 150 Anniversary of the Kingitanga (Te Kauhanganui), Kura Reo (Maniapoto), human resource management within iwi trust boards (Te Arawa) and models of social policy development (Ngati Awa).

For 2008, interns were selected based on their level of study, grades, research aspirations and the extent of their existing links to the iwi concerned.

“Without exception, all interns participating on the 2008 programme are hugely talented and motivated to support their iwi,” said the Pro VC Maori office.

Each intern receives a grant to support them in their research and is expected to undertake the equivalent of a 10 week research programme.

“The research programme varies from one internship to the next and projects are tailored to the subject expertise of the intern” claimed the Pro VC Maori office.


Falling through the cracks of hidden debt By Sophie Schroder - Debate

Many university students are taking out large personal loans to cover rising course-related expenses – the hidden cost of tertiary study. Students studying practice-based degrees, such as fashion, dentistry or medicine, have to pay up to $10,000 a year in expenses associated with their course. This is on top of their normal university fees. While student debt in New Zealand has reached the $10 billion mark, this figure fails to account for the hidden debt occurring because of course related costs.

Ms Lelievre will not have to repay her student allowance because her parents have a limited income, and will be unable to support her financially with such a big debt.

Jan Herman, the president of the Auckland Student Movement at AUT,

“It’s a catch 22. I can’t work more and contribute to costs like material because of the Studylink conditions, and my parents can’t help me out

says although the issue is becoming a big problem, it has yet to be addressed.

either. I feel like I am stuck in a rut and I’m sure I’m not alone in this,” she says.

“The course-related costs policy is a huge issue. I’ve had people approach me where course related costs come to about $3000 to $4000 per year,” he says.

Mr Herman agrees.

While students are entitled to an interest-free loan of $1000 a year for such costs, for many this isn’t enough.

“Earlier this year NZUSA (New Zealand Union of Students’ Associations) released a report saying that debt stands at about $28,000 for an average student, but they guestimate that the other costs stand at about $10,000,” he says.

Fashion and Design student Kerri Lelievre estimates her course-related costs will reach about $7000 for this year alone.

He says a good solution would be to look at each degree separately and estimate course-related costs individually.

Ms Lelievre is entitled to $193 a week in student allowance from Studylink, which she doesn’t have to repay. As part of the conditions of this she is allowed to earn only $180 a week before tax.

In this way, the $1,000 a year loan will be spread around more fairly, meaning that those studying more expensive degrees would be entitled to more of it, and those who have lower course-related costs would receive less.

She says she is struggling to save enough to pay for her high courserelated costs. “I live away from home so all my student allowance goes towards rent and I rely on my job income for food and bills. I am at the stage where I will need to get a personal bank loan to cover the course-related costs which means when I leave at the end of the year I will get slammed with huge interest rates,” she says.

David Bennett MP M P f o r h aM i l t o n e a s t

Phone: 07 834 3407 Email:

“Depending what course you are studying there should be a maximum in the amount you are able to borrow,” he says. Student debt has risen steadily following the fourth Labour Governments introduction of $1,250 flat fee in 1990. Under the current 2007 fee maxima policy, tertiary institutions are able to raise fees by up to five percent every year. Mr Herman advises concerned students to lobby local politicians or talk to their student associations. “This is relevant throughout New Zealand. If you don’t have the family backing or a college fund, you just end up having the poor people not going to uni and working the lower jobs. “Education becomes a commodity with the rich people making all the money and being successful. It’s a big issue,” he says. Studylink did not return requests for comments 11

Execution This week’s WSU meeting had bladder-destroying and mind-bending three-hour run time. Nexus was only available for one hour, due to its commitment of expanding the minds of toady’s youth, but will do its best to give the juiciest parts of this time. The meeting started smoothly with acceptances of the apologies. Then came the minutes for the meeting of the 28th (Last week). It was discovered that there was no record of a chair at the last meeting which Mr. Hawkes thought needed clarification. Nexus thought that all present would remember sitting on the floor anyway. It was soon decided that the Vice President is a totally suitable chair, proving the strength of Ms. Beatties’ limbs. Hawkes also had a problem with the fact there was no motion for the WSU General Manager being able to talk. It was then rebutted that this was a discussion not a motion and therefore did not have to be “ayed” upon. Confused? So was Nexus. A special report next week will examine the difference.* Correspondence was run through quickly and efficiently with the biggest issue being Mr. Delaney’s explanation of what a “thank you” was. Moira reported on the Unigames debrief, reporting it was “interesting to say the least.” This excited Nexus but it seems the WSU and Nexus use different scales when it comes to measuring levels of interest. Turns out everyone had a really good time and the team should stay together in the future. Neat-o. Events were discussed with Ms. Neho commenting that the WSU directors should be more involved in their own events. It appears that bribes of pizza and beer have been working too well lately with the

turnout at the SGM blowing the Directors minds. Nexus hid behind the Chair to avoid the projectile brain matter. Around this time Ms. Beattie and Ms. Iremonger began passing notes to each other. Nexus couldn’t see the content of this but imagined it being of an intimate nature. Around this time discussion began around an enrol to vote party on campus, but Mr. Delamere and Mr. James already had their enrolment sorted and started their own meeting on the couch. Ms. Neho told them to be quiet or leave. They left, and so did Nexus. *Lies

Nexus Monday 10th April, 1989 Vol. 22, No. 8 ‘Silent protest creates big noise’ On Friday 7th April, over 800 Waikato Polytechnic, Waikato University, and non-students protested against the government’s new loan and health scheme at the opening of the new nursing block at Waikato Polytechnic. Associate Education Minister, Phil Goff, opened the new block to a sea of placard and banner waving silent protestors. Some placards read: “By Goff, Learning’s off”, “Education is not a commodity”, and “Ask students before you change their rights!” The reason for the silent demonstration was because students believed government ministers never paid attention to the students themselves and always kept them in the dark about education policies. A comment from one of the demonstrators illustrated this point, “Why should we scream and shout when they never even listen to us?”


As Mr. Goff was giving his speech about the rise in loan interest and prescriptions from the campus pharmacy, the silence from protestors seemed to bother and fret the Associate Minister. The only thing that was uttered during the five minute speech was a reminder to Mr. Goff that the election was next year and the student vote was a vital part. Hamilton West MP, Trevor Mallard, was also at the opening. He believed the raising of loan interest would be a success for Waikato University revenue and help towards developing new infrastructure on campus. Even though the regulations do not take place till next semester, students have been writing to the WSU for a review of the rise in loan interest and its consequences. A silent member of the crowd broke his silence when he said, “What’s the point of opening new buildings when we can’t even afford to study in them?”

East Hamilton Police Burglary Report 28th - 4th August 2008 It is great to report that only six burglaries occurred in the Hamilton East area last week. Their locations are shown on the map. With break-ins reducing down to single figures, I want to emphasize the importance of still continuing to lock your windows / doors when you go out. From the six break-ins that occurred, four of them have involved University students. I have analysed last week’s break-ins and it appears offenders are still targeting student flats between 05.30pm to 03.00am on the weekends. So if you’re going to go out at night into town or just popping out for a short time to see friends, make sure you lock everything up. Please remember that you might forget to lock / window your door, but the offender will never. These offenders are still forcing their way into flats, either using a screw driver or perhaps a crowbar. Another way to help reduce break-ins, is to talk to your neighbours or fellow students that live close to you. If you do go out, tell a neighbour

you trust and ask them to keep an eye on your flat. This is just another way to help prevent your items being stolen. Items that have been taken over the past week are Laptops, I-Pods, Digital Camera, Electric Guitar, Hard Drive, Monitor, Cash & Jewellery. Security Advice: If you have been broken into in the past, it might be worthwhile talking to your landlord and get some new locks fixed to your windows or even a house alarm. You are entitled to ask you landlord for these items, remember they do own the house so why wouldn’t they want it secure. Information on how to protect your home is available from the East Hamilton Community Policing Centre on Clyde St. If you have any information that might help Police with these burglaries please call the University Constable, Nick Sickelmore Nicholas.

Strategic Finance suspends withdrawals What’s strategic right now: If you’re in finance Get the bloody hell out. Petricevic is declared bankrupt Financier bankrupt Nice irony, but less fun If you lost money Unemployment rate rises again Joblessness, fatness On the rise - cake too expensive Let them eat pies Iran defiant as nuclear deadline passes by Is it a threat to Jewish state? Iran, bear in mind You gon’ get raped

Pot calling kettle black… Gaffe! Oh shit! Oh shit!” US Aids numbers higher Too much aids? Homophobes would have you think That there are too many gays Silver Scroll finalists unveiled - choose your winner It’s pretty damn obvious Who should win Don’t be a douche – choose Liam Finn Hotwired car had no engine Brainless thieves still tried to get in Even though the car Lacked an engine

McCain accuses Obama of racial politics “Obama, you racist By Drummond-san


Txts to the Editor! Nexus now has a semi-new TXT-in service! Send Letters to the Editor - via text - to 021 235 8436. They can be about anything – but if it’s something in the magazine, so much the better. We’ll print the best ones, so get texting! Texts should include a name to attribute them to. Text of the week wins a mystery prize!

Dear Nexus

Don’t forget: You can send Busted pictures in by pxt! Send us your best snaps of you or your mates in Busted-type situations to 021 235 8436. Can you do it? Yes you can!

play by their rules. If I didn’t, I’d just be an ignorant infidel (nonbeliever) who deserved no rights.

Why the fuck should you worry about how offensive your magazine is to Muslims? If I were to go to a Muslim country, there’s a very real chance that I couldn’t talk about things I wanted to talk about there. I’d have to watch crowds of angry young men jump up and down, burning American flags and calling for the destruction of Israel and risk my physical safety if I were to say anything against them. In Malaysia and many other Muslim countries you can be put to death for preaching Christianity or women’s rights or anything else viewed as western or evil. To sum it up, if I went to a Muslim country, I’d have to

Yet somehow, when the people of Islam come to New Zealand, we have to play by their rules? If we burn Saudi flags we are racist, if we speak poorly of Islam we are ignorant and if we ever DARE to mention the prophet Muhammad (pbuh) in a way which is less than glorifying we are sinners of the worst degree. I believe Nexus should take a stand against this cultural colonisation of New Zealand. It doesn’t seem like anyone else is going to do it. AD


BENNETT: REJECTED Why does David Bennett want to be my friend? Why is David Bennett sending me letters and trying to be my friend on facebook? Does he not have any friends of his own? I wonder if he really wants to be friends or if he will just shower me with friendly generic letters and then after the election ignore me like his party ignores students. Ahhh attempted vote grabbing at its finest Chris p.s thanks for the letters Dave but unfortunately I have a social conscious so will never be voting national.

Response to Kinda Confused I know that to some people this will seem kind of lame, but as the WSU Men’s Officer I feel that I have to voice my disappointment that a female feels that it’s okay to say ‘What the hell’ and use the men’s toilet in K block. The fact that at the time it was not being used and the belief that in her opinion no men appear to have been disadvantaged is a pretty weak excuse which I am sure wouldn’t be accepted if the situation was one where a male decided to use a women’s toilet. I am sure there are many men who would have felt more than a little uncomfortable if they had walked into a toilet and found a

member of the opposite sex in it, just as many females would also feel more than a little bit uncomfortable in a similar situation. If there are not enough toilets for women then by all means let us (the WSU) know so that we can bring the issue to the attention of the appropriate people. Now days there seems to be a trend that if it’s done by a female and no one is hurt then don’t worry about it; I have no problem with this attitude so long as it also applies to males. Equals rights for all and lets respect each other’s space(s). WSU Mens Officer Glen Delamere


PH 07 856 6813 14

FAX 07 856 2255

ADDRESS Gate 5 Hillcrest Road




turned him loose on campus with the word “moron” tattoed into his forehead. In mirror writing.)

LETTERS POLICY: Nexus welcomes and encourages debate through the letters page, serious or not. Letters should be kept under 250 words and be received by

It would be a sad day if Nexus comes to end. It was bad enough when the photoshopping ended, but the whole magazine? Dumb az ourr. I can’t see why they can’t hike the WSU levies up a little, its not like anyone would notice the difference anyway.

Wednesday 5pm on the week prior to publication.


SELAM I am a Turkish student and I am here for one semester. I would like to know what activities you do regarding the Uni Muslim Club and where you are located on the Uni campus?

We’ll print basically any letter, but the editor reserves the right to abridge or refuse

(We received this letter at around 10:30 on Tuesday. Then we got this…)

correspondence. We won’t correct your spelling and


Do you have an overview of the activities for the Islam Awareness Week in Hamilton? I couldn’t find much information about the things which will take place here in Hamilton.

grammar either, so it’s up to you how much of an idiot you look like. Pseudonyms

Bargh, Nexus loves to trick me by using articles dated 1990. Bring back the photoshop.

Best regards

are okay (all correspondence must include your real name

Cyclo Cinar Kayar

and contact details – they won’t be printed if you don’t want them to be) but if it’s a serious letter we’d prefer you to use your real name. Send letters to nexus@

Thank you very much

(From which we guess that he went around telling all his friends that Nexus was going to close down, only to have them laugh, point out that the Vault article he’d gotten his information on was dated “1990” – whereupon, hopefully, his friends trussed him up and

Sorry, no. Not that it matters – Islam Awareness was last week. On the bright side, this week is Zoroastrianism Awareness Week! (Maybe. Actually, probably not. But we’ve got an article about it anyway.)

NO ROOM AT THE INN Jonah is an African post-grad student who is finding getting somewhere to live difficult. When he calls, the flat is vacant but when he goes to see it, it is suddenly taken. The University branch of Citizens Advice Bureau can give you information about this or other hassles you might have. They have heaps of pamphlets and a huge database to help answer anyone’s questions. Visit them at the Cowshed from 1pm – 3pm daily during semesters or phone 8384466 extn 6622 or 0800FORCAB. By the way, Jonah can speak to the Student Accommodation Office, or contact the Human Rights Commission at ph 0800 496 877.


YOU’RE RIGHT. IT WAS A TERRIBLE IDEA. I just want to respond to ANP comment in last weeks nexus regarding “why don’t you try it, if you think it’s such a great idea?” Auckland University Students Association (AUSA) ending up dropping the $5’000 reward for a citizens arrest of Condoleezza Rice and honestly it’s a waste of your money. Each student at this university pays $94 a year to the WSU, ask around would you really want us to blow $5’000 bucks on an event like that? I do support the AUSA kaupapa but not in that fashion. Whetu – WSU Director, Education portfolio


Hi Mike Editorial: Bland

Hey bo, smasho?

The only thing bland abt hamilton is yr editorial. Try getting out a bit more. Hams is a great little city – comparing it to Melbourne is absurd.

That’s not very nice. It’s funny, though

Yes, we do

Can’t read # 3, or: I hope your dad can read

Nexus rules… some stuff

Lucky Eric To eric, il b ur gf. Will require food and regular lurve. ;)

That’s what SHE said Why is everyond getting pissed off if anyone says anything about their religion even tho they preach about going to hell if u don’t do what they say is right. If im wrong then I say SMITE ME OH MIGHTY SMITER

Hugboy/ Dark Kaiser/ whoever. Rope is on sale at Mitre 10.

Save nexus!! It’s the funniest mag ever, and it brightens up my Monday mornings. Even my dad reads it!!

You’re a douche, Finlay (apparently)

Finlay (second name deleted) your a fuckin douche and i want all the nexus readers to know you have a needle dick and cant find a clitoris to save yourself if you wer given a map. U nerly turned me gay-luckily i found a man better than you!!!!!!!!

Zoroastrianism By Mahafrin Variava

These are the teachings of Zoroaster, and the beliefs of every Zoroastrian. This is how we start our day and how we end it. Our good thoughts, good words, and good deeds extend to people beyond our religion.

seven, or sometimes nine, we’re baptized into the religion. This is called “Navjote “. You feel content and happy, that you’re part of something so beautiful. Zoroastrians are supposed to pray three times a day. Although it’s not a set amount, what is said is that whenever we do have nothing to do, and that means absolutely nothing, we should always use that time to think of God. In fact, God should be on our mind always.

Our religion has been dated as the oldest (or one of the oldest) religions in the world. Our religion enters the books of History during the early5th Century BC. We were the first ever religion of the Persian Empire, which is now Iran. Unfortunately, our religion, religious texts, and many monuments were destroyed, preventing our religion to flourish. Today in the world, there are only 300,000 of us left. Yet we have the hope that some day, our religion shall rise again.

A life of a Zoroastrian, which could be called “well lived” is one which could be labeled “happy” and satisfying. As a Zoroastrian, we’re expected to live, leading by example. We wish to be the best we can be, the best daughter or son, sister or brother, father, mother etc. We believe in charity, and helping others, and most of all we hold strong family values, and know how important it is to give back to our community. We’re also very strong believers of Karma.

Today Iran is dominated by another religion.10% of the Iranian population continues to follow Zoroastrianism and stay true to the religion. The Zoroastrians in Iran have a long history and are the oldest religious community of that nation to survive to this present-day. Prior to the Invasion of Iran, Zoroastrianism had been the primary religion of the Persian People. Today, it is unfortunate, that us Zoroastrians must hide, and worship our God in secret, because we aren’t allowed to do so in Iran any longer.

We are often labelled as “fire worshippers” – but we are not “fire worshippers”. We believe fire is good, and light is good, and light and fire symbolize purity. Till today, there are Zoroastrians living in caves, in mountains in Iran, worshipping and practicing Zoroastrianism, because they cannot do so, openly. All they have with them are their prayers, their own people and of course, Fire. A fire, which has continued to burn for hundreds of years, it’s actually quite miraculous.

“Good thoughts, Good Words, Good Deeds”

There are the Iranis, who continue to practice the Religion in Iran, and Parsis, who fled to India during the first invasion of Persia, and followed the Religion there. What is the difference? We follow the same religion, but have adapted to the customs differently. Nevertheless we are all one at heart. We believe that Ahura Mazda (The God of Wisdom), our God, is one, and universal. All worship is ultimately directed towards him. The Avesta is our holy book and it was complied over several hundred years. What it comprises of is our prayers, hymns which were composed by Zarathustra (Zoroaster) himself. Every Zoroastrian is baptized. As youth, we’re told the stories of our ancestors, and taught to pray and by the age of

Our population isn’t much in Hamilton. Surprisingly I don’t know of Any Zoroastrians in Hamilton, in fact I think I’m the only one! But in Auckland, and Wellington, we’ve got organizations that hold prayer classes and meetings and events for the Zoroastrian community in New Zealand. If you’d like more Information about our Religion, its best to Google us, and you’ll find heaps! Or even get in contact with me! Tandaroosti to you all! (Best wishes)


PHOTOGRAPHY Sam Crawford - Images courtesy of TIKIDUB PRODUCTIONS

Into It: The Hamilton Drum and Bass scene By Emma Swete


“Drum and bass is a thriving subculture, which is appealing to an increasing number of people from all different walks of life.”

This Saturday, 16 August, local drum and bass

Given this, why is our DnB scene so much

crew High Society will be celebrating their first birthday with the help of long time friend Tiki Taane.

smaller than other places like Dunedin? Dunedin has a thriving drum and bass scene, there is even an entire website dedicated to supporting local artists and advertising upcoming gigs. (Check it out at www.

This gig shows how Hamilton is reflecting the growing support of drum and bass music that is happening all over New Zealand and the world. I spoke with members of High Society and Tiki Taane to gain their perspectives on drum and bass culture in New Zealand. (I spoke to all the members of High Society at once, and my notes of who’s who are a bit muddled. For simplicity, I’ve referred to them as a collective, instead of individual members. I’m sure they won’t mind) It would be difficult to deny that there has been a definite growth in the support of drum and bass in New Zealand over the past few years. Artists like Concord Dawn and Shapeshifter have been played on major radio stations, along with overseas bands like Pendulum generating further interest in alternative styles of music. Drum and bass is a thriving subculture, which is appealing to an increasing number of people from all different walks of life. In recent years drum and bass gigs in Hamilton have been few and far between. There was a very strong scene in the early 2000’s – but the departure of many talented musicians and the closure of supporting clubs saw DnB all but die out. Geographically, Hamilton is a fantastic place to grow a strong DnB scene. Being so near to Auckland it wouldn’t be hard to recruit Auckland DJ’s to play gigs here and demographically we have a large young population to support it.

In order to look at DnB in Hamilton we must first put Hamilton’s club scene into perspective. For many young people Hamilton is a stopover town. We stop here for 3-4 years while we study and then move on. The general experience is that the first year is spent in the drunken haze of living in the halls and negotiating your way about town, mostly ending up at the Outback. The second year is spent still frequenting the Outback (because everyone goes there), but wishing that there was somewhere better to go. By the third year just the thought of going to the Outback is somewhat repulsive, not to mention that even if you do go there you feel like everyone is looking at you because you are too old; this is the point when people start looking for a fresh new clubbing scene. A lot of people would like to try new clubs and different genres of music, but are often unsure of where to go and when. There are a lot of posters around town advertising which DJs are playing where, but if you are not familiar with what music they play then it can all be quite meaningless. It’s a system of trial and error, trying out different bars and genres of music until you find something that you enjoy. Many people fall in to the trap of not recognising that there are many genres of electronic music and they are all very different. For many

people their only experience of dance music is hearing Darude’s ‘Sandstorm’ playing at the Outback or seeing Shortland Street’s recent portrayal of the dance music scene. Lately, there has definitely been a reemergence of DnB music in Hamilton. I have heard Pendulum and Shapeshifter songs played at CBD and the Outback. High Society acknowledges that bands like Pendulum getting mainstream radio play is encouraging people to seek out different clubs and styles of music. While Hamilton’s close proximity to Auckland can be an advantage to recruiting DJs for gigs, it can also be hindrance to the growth of local drum and bass. Many people will make the drive up to Auckland rather than supporting local gigs. However, I think a lot of the time this can be put down to a lack of awareness that gigs are even on. DnB in Hamilton is still very much in its infancy and looking for new clubs to support the scene and help it to expand. High Society explains that the Hamilton scene retreated for a few years – “to rethink itself,” as they put it. “The stuff that was being produced overseas wasn’t that good and there was a lack of unity,” they explain. “ For a while there was a split between those who were trying to crack the mainstream market and those who were trying to go further underground because they through the music was becoming too commercialised. However, now it has returned with a fresh new sound and more energy than ever before. DnB is constantly growing and evolving and that’s why it is so exciting to be a part of.” The High Society boys commented that the DnB gigs differ from other gigs for several 19

reasons. The main reason they gave was that people are there for the music and therefore everyone in the audience has something in common. “The people are less pretentious and just out to cut loose and have a good time, unlike a lot of other places,” they said. They also thought that DnB gigs attract people that are after something different and therefore the audiences can be a bit more open minded and therefore a great place for meeting interesting people. Both the High Society and Tiki commented that the drum and bass atmosphere is “more high energy” and that “everyone’s just out for a good time.” High Society’s view of DnB in Hamilton is that it is growing and evolving; always pushing boundaries. They have noticed that the whole music scene has really been revved up by a few drum and bass artists breaking in to more mainstream markets. In particular that there is huge support for tracks produced by New Zealand artists. “People are coming to our gigs and loving the New Zealand tracks- they’ve sort of become like anthems; everyone sings along to them.”

Describe how you see the drum and bass scene in NZ? I see the drum and bass scene that way that I’ve always seen it. I see it as something that is very passionate and we’re in a very interesting phase at the moment. When I first started MC’n for this type of stuff was about 1995-96 and back then it was very underground, it was the same with dub reggae as well, it was more of an acquired taste. There was a lot of grunge still around at the time and the dance scene was very much in to raves and trance, house was also really big.


Hopefully drum and bass will continue to grow and expand in Hamilton, as well as the rest of New Zealand – which will provide a different clubbing experience for those who are sick of hearing only top 40 and house music in town.

Show your support for local drum and bass by joining High Society’s Facebook page! – simply search “High Society” and add yourself as a friend. Details for the gig: 16 August 2008, Kremlin Bar, with support of Tiki Taane, $10 on door or $5 for High Society’s Facebook friends.

However, there is also a lack of support from club managers and it can be difficult to promote gigs. But as the gigs have been getting more popular, support has grown and new opportunities are presenting

Tiki Taane first rose to fame as the frontman of Salmonella Dub. However, he has now established himself as a diverse solo artist with the release of his album ‘Past, Present and Future’ and his relentless touring schedule. Many people aren’t aware of Taane’s long association with drum and bass in New Zealand. I spoke with him to get his take on drum and bass in New Zealand and hear his experiences of drum and bass culture.

themselves. “You need a really good soundsystem for drum and bass and many clubs in Hamilton are lacking in that area,” High Society explained. “There is still a way to go before drum and bass is prevalent on the Hamilton clubbing scene, but it is definitely making a comeback that’s why it’s so exciting to be a part of right now”.

More information on Tiki can be found on his website

It’s 2008, nearly 2009 now and I’m still very involved with it. There are still artists that break through and have some tunes on the big radio stations, like Concord Dawn was probably the first to really push out and get commercial radio play and Shapeshifter of course have pushed through as well and even State of Mind are starting to break through, but in saying that it will still always be underground – it won’t make the top 40. I still see it as the way I did back in 1996 when I got involved with this style of music. It’s still very much a sub culture.

Do you think that we have enough good drum and bass artists in New Zealand to support a healthy drum and bass scene? It’s healthier now than it’s ever been, because there is a younger crowd getting involved. I’ve noticed through my MC gigs that the bars are packed with 18-24 year olds and they know the tunes. It’s pretty strong now.

There are only a few guys who can make a living out of it at this point in time, but there are many progressive artists who are bringing drum and bass through to its next level. Drum and bass has always been progressive, it’s always been about pushing the boundaries. It goes through phases of everyone producing the same thing, but then someone will break through and put out something different. I think that the scene is definitely healthy in this country, however in saying that we also have a lot of crap producers that are putting out mediocre drum and bass, but that goes with any style of music and any kind of art form. There are always gonna be people that are pushing the boundaries and making stuff that is cutting edge and then there will be people making paint by numbers drum and bass. What is your impression of Hamilton’s drum and bass scene? My experience of drum and bass in Hamilton has always been mad! The crowds have been massive and always been up for it and it’s like

DnB will still always be underground – it won’t make the top 40. I still see it as the way I did back in 1996 when I got involved with this style of music. It’s still very much a sub culture.


that all around New Zealand. It used to be a very Christchurch, Wellington, Auckland thing, but now it’s in places like Palmerston North, New Plymouth and even Ashburton. Hamilton’s drum and bass scene really stepped up back in 2000 with the Motion [the club that later became Catalyst] crew representing drum and bass. Now in New Zealand we even have events like Phat 08, a party in the middle of the bush with people going crazy to drum and bass for 3 days.

What is it about drum and bass that appeals to you? In the beginning it was just about the pure power of the production. When I first started going to raves it was all about the trance and house music but then sometimes someone like DJ Pylon (one of the first drum and bass DJ’s in NZ) would play drum and bass and it would stick out like dogs balls. The production was so much phatter and it was so much crazier and more intense. It was darker and deeper. It was that heaviness that really got me in to it. There was a whole sub culture that came with it. A style of language, a style of dress that went with that whole sub culture of drum and bass. It was a whole movement and it really felt like it was drum and bass against the rest of the world. It was the same as being part of the dub reggae movement here in Aotearoa; we felt underground, like the underdog sound. The love of it for me was discovering something that no one else was in to. From that point I suppose I started to make it and produce it, getting more in to the technical 22

side of it. It’s just real high energy and there’s nothing like a rolling bass line and a big phat drum beat, plus the tempo around 170180bpms, I just love that tempo. How do your drum and bass audiences differ from your other audiences? It more of a rock n roll audience, for sure. Drum and bass audiences seem louder and more vocal. They’re straight up for it, you don’t have to try to work up a dance floor; they’re pretty much in your face and ready to go. It is becoming slightly more bogan, many of the guys and girls coming in to drum and bass come from a rock background. Particularly the guys who are producing it, they pretty much all come from heavy metal backgrounds. Concord Dawn, Bulletproof, State of Mind, Agent Alvin, even the Upbeats; they’ve all got pop/rock backgrounds, so it has definitely got a bogan element to it, that’s for sure. I think that because it is such a high energy style of music it has definitely got a kind of ‘fuck you’ rock attitude, which is awesome; I really dig that about drum and bass. Do you recognise any shared characteristics of drum and bass fans? No. When it first started out in the mid 1990’s we had a sub culture, you could definitely tell a drum and bass head from anybody else. Nowadays it’s a big mash up, especially with my audiences. I use a lot of genres and therefore pull in a lot of different people. I get guys with heavy metal t shirts turning up along with guys in suits. It’s all different types of people which is really cool. Now, it’s pulling in

different people from all walks of life, whereas it used to be very segregated. Who are you picking for the next up and comers on New Zealand’s drum and bass scene? There’s a cat called Dose and he’s kicking ass, making phat tunes. Technik; he’s always been around but he’s really pushing some wicked stuff at the moment. State of Mind, of course, are rolling. Agent Alvin is always doing stuff. I think Dose and Technik are the guys who are really pushing some progressive new drum and bass. What are your links to High Society? We go back just over 10 years. I think I first came down with Concord Dawn and hooked up with Paul [DJ Felun] and the boys at Motion. I was MC’n and we were rocking out together. It’s only been quite recently that we’ve connected again, for about 5 years we never really saw each other, but there was a time before that when I was coming to Hamilton quite a bit and hanging out and MC’n and rocking out with them. Lately, since I have been a solo artist we have been reconnecting which has been really cool, gone full circle again, so I’m really looking forward to this show, its High Society’s first birthday so its gonna be pretty mental. What are your musical passions? Obviously dub is a huge part of my life and also drum and bass/jungle. I pretty much like anything with soul. It doesn’t even have to

“It has definitely got a bogan element to it. I think that because it is such a high energy style of music it has definitely got a kind of ‘fuck you’ rock attitude, which is awesome; I really dig that about drum and bass.”

have a beat or a bass line as long as it’s got

than just looking at it as the ‘new Tiki track.’

Will you tell me what that is?

something that stirs my soul. I suppose that drum and bass and dub reggae have been the main genres of music that are really affecting me because of the production, rhythm, the tempo and the sub culture that goes with them. Dub reggae now is becoming a little too popular now anyway, which I probably have a part in as well. It’s interesting to compare now with 10 years ago; I wouldn’t have had a number one single 10 years ago.

It was really controversial and that was a real joy for me. I knew that it was gonna shock a lot of people at first, but now it’s really turned people around.

No, that’s no ones business to know what that is.

What can we expect to see/hear from you in the near future? That’s all top secret. The reason that I say that is ‘cause you just don’t know. I never really know and even if I do know then I don’t really tell anybody I just go and do it and then wait for people to catch up. That’s just my style I just make stuff and release it and people can figure it out for themselves. I’m gonna be releasing a remix album and I’m working on a few things, but I’m not gonna go into that. How have people reacted to the Maori influenced tracks on your album? Really cool. I dropped Tangaroa first which is probably the heaviest, most progressive, uncommercial track. I wanted to shake people up and I had a mixed response on that, it was really interesting. I had a bunch of people who were really in to it that I would never have thought would be in to it. There were other stations that I would have thought would pick it up, but they found it too challenging, too threatening. I wanted people to think and make up their own minds about it. I wanted people to use their intelligence about it, rather

Having ‘Always On My Mind’ around is really pulling a lot of people in to my album and exposing them to the culture and different styles of music that they wouldn’t otherwise necessarily be exposed to. I get a lot of comments on Tangaroa on my website which is awesome for me because that’s what I grew up with. I wanted the video and the song to be educational so that it could be used in Kapahaka classes at schools. It’s quite a timeless tune. Is there anything that you wish people would ask you, but they never do? I like interviews that ask the questions that aren’t so obvious. I like questions that are intelligent that other people haven’t asked before. I still get a lot of Salmonella Dub questions, which is ok because it was a big part of my life, but I left 2 years and ago and sometimes it’s like ‘come on guys, catch up!’ But it’s ok cause if it wasn’t for Salmonella Dub I wouldn’t be where I am today and if it wasn’t for me they wouldn’t be where they are today. Is Tiki your real name? I was given 2 names as a kid; a Maori name and a Pakeha name. By the time I was about 3-4 I was saying that my name was Tiki and I wouldn’t use the Pakeha name. I’ve always been called Tiki, but on my passport I have an English name.

Tiki is my name and I refer to the other name as my slave name, it’s not my real name. I am Tiki through and through and I have been for 30 years. My other name is just a name that the police use and customs officers use and so that’s why I think that it is an oppressing name. I believe that people grow in to their name. Cheers for the interview, Tiki. Have you got any closing remarks? I think that if you are out there making drum and bass then keep on playing it out. Even if you have written one tune it doesn’t have to go anywhere, it can take years and years making this kind of music before you can actually get a release. Always keep trying new stuff. If you look at earlier stuff it has just progressed so much, it’s always moving. At the moment we are just coming out of a rock phase which is the big sampling from rock bands. Pendulum went through that whole ‘clown step phase’. I don’t even know where we are at the moment or where it’s heading and that’s the exciting thing about drum and bass is that its always progressing and always moving. Cheers!


Enrol to Vote and PARTY!!! By Olivia Beattie

The national elections are fast approaching, which means that if you are not already enrolled, it’s time to do so now! The WSU are making it as easy for you as possible. We will be around campus Monday to Thursday this week signing people up; so if you see us come and enrol or change your details. Everyone who enrols will receive a ticket to the *Enrol to Vote Party* on Thursday evening, where you will be greeted and treated with free food, drinks (alcoholic and non-alcoholic), a DJ spinning up tunes, and an awesome time! This party will be held at the ground floor of the Student Union Building (by Oranga). If you are already enrolled to vote, don’t despair, you are welcome to join us at the party too. Either get your ticket from us during the week, or just turn up on the night.

Thursdays In Black


The 31st of July (two Thursdays ago) was the national day of action for ‘Thursdays in Black’. With Rachael painting and preparing a massive black sheet along with the help of Jo, Liv and Tracey, the WSU girls hung the sheet up on the west side of the boarding surrounding the currently under-construct Village Green by the Bongo Café. By wearing black on Thursdays it indicates you are tired of putting up with rape and violence within your community and shows you want to be free. The WSU along with the Tertiary Women’s Focus Group and NZUSA want you to demand a world without rape and violence by wearing black every Thursday and on the 31st we got signatures on the black sheet from everyone who walked past in appreciation of the cause. So from every Thursday onwards people, don’t look back and chuck on some black…Show your support for a world without rape and violence.

As an environmentalist, I am glad to see that there has been a change in thinking amongst attitudes towards environmental issues. Not that long ago ‘greenies’ were considered hippies. Currently you are considered socially responsible and applauded if you recycle, have solar power to run your household, drive an eco car or take public transport to work. This shows that most people do care about the environment we live in and ideologies are changing. I would like to make a point about smoking though. I haven’t yet heard this issue been raised. It would seem that not only is smoking terrible for 24

Remember, that it’s illegal for you not to be enrolled anyway so you may as well get something for it. Come enrol with us and PARTY!!! What: Enrol to Vote Party When: Thursday 14th August Where: Student Union Building See you all there!!

Service Spotlight For the next few weeks I will be using the service spotlight to introduce too many of you for the first time your staff at the WSU. I will start at the front desk with Shannon Cleave who is often the first face that many of you will encounter when you come into the Student Union Building. Shannon has been with the Student Union for a few years now and as such has much valuable ‘institutional’ knowledge; this includes knowing much of the history of the Executive of which she at one stage was a member. One of her key roles is that of Clubs Co-ordinator and she can inform you of all the requirements to set up a club, she is also the main point of contact for any assistance that you may require from the WSU as if she can’t help you herself she will know who you can contact for help.

your health but it also takes its toll on the environment. Imagine how much smoke and poisons are produced from smoking cigarettes; this is surely damaging the environment though poor air quality, emissions, rubbish produced and trees used. Society is always talking about emissions produced from cars, buses and trucks; how about talking about the emissions caused from smoking cigarettes. There are also problems with rubbish caused from cigarettes i.e. cigarette butts as well as the vast amounts of trees being cut down for cigarette papers. Maybe if people start looking at these issues there too will be a shift in thinking about smoking.

Term Events: What’s happening on campus? By Deni Tokunai Since B Semester kicked off three weeks ago, the WSU Directors and staff have already launched a number of projects and campaigns—with more being planned as we progress through another month of tertiary education. B-Semester Fiesta, the re-branded event formerly known to the student masses

of Bar-101. The national Thursday’s In Black campaign was re-launched last week by the WSU as a symbol of strength and courage in demanding a world without rape and violence. The International Students’ Radio Show will be launched this week to coincide with the celebration of International Languages Week

Elections are just around the corner, and the inaugural Hori 440 car rally will snake its way down to Palmerston North at the end of this term.

as “Re-Orientation Week” kicked off and ended up concluding amongst the dance vibes

(Sunday 17 – Saturday 23). The Enrol to Vote Party is happening next week, the 2009 WSU

August, and the 2008 Law Ball (Bigger, better, and at Mystery Creek!) is scheduled for Friday, 22 August.

Eduwhets with the Education… thing. Voon. They don’t put headlines on these things, and I don’t have the slightest idea what to call them – Ed.

By Whetu If you’re doing a qualification in the school of management, whether it is at under-graduate level, graduate diploma or graduate certificate, you have to endure a level 0 paper called the writing competency module. Are you over it? Were you informed that you had to pass this paper in the first semester you were enrolled or you would have to do MCOM104? I want to hear from you! Contact me on Contact me especially if you are a graduate student and you have been forced to take the writing competency module before completing a grad dip or grad cert. My personal feeling is that having to do a writing competency module when you already have a degree is absurd…it means the qualification you currently hold is undermined by an insignificant testing system. Even worse I know of cases where persons who have degrees from this university have enrolled in management qualification to be told they also have to do the writing competency module. Let me know how you feel and what’s going on out there.

Other diary student dates to make note of: Tertiary Challenge is happening this Friday, 8

Sport Results with AJ With weather not at its best only two lonely games were played between both codes on the weekend of August 2nd. Unicol A’s lost 1-0 at Cambridge and in another close encounter the Unicol B2 Women’s team went down 2-1 to Whakamaru/Mangakino on their away trip. Because it’s nearing the end of the season I’ll put the dates and opposition of the remaining games for each team after the weekend of the 9th of August. RUGBY – VARSITY W.U.R.F.C U85’s v. Hamilton Marist Plus finals (currently placed 4th)

(16th August)


v. Wanderers Classics v. Te Awamutu v. Taumarunui v. Eastern City v. Tokoroa D v. Hamilton North D v. Wanderers D v. Te Aroha Cobras

(16th Aug) (16th Aug) (30th Aug) (6th Sept) (16th Aug) (23rd Aug) (16th Aug) (23rd Aug)

v. Eastern Suburbs v. Ngaruawahia B v. Wanderers B v. Taumarunui Sports v. Morrinsville Madness

(17th Aug) (24th Aug) (17th Aug) (24th Aug) (7th Sept)



Saturday October 11th 11am till 3pm, Gate 7 Hillcrest Road.

Sign up at the WSU Office download an entry form from Best team Trolley Fastest Trolley Best Team Name Best Dressed Team

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RANDOM STUFF Any one else going to the disturbed concert in Auckland? want to pitch in for gas money and catch a lift up there with two guys? or we pitch in for gas and get a lift with you? preferably looking for 3 hot boganettes but gas money is gas money txt Gavin on 0273506677 Kredite/ Darlehen von fuehrenden deutschen Banken mit 5-7% Jahreszinsen. Keine Versteckte Kosten!!! Infoanfrage an: somedouchespammer@gmail. com Where Students Buy and Sell No listing fees, success fees or registration charges, its FREE. Perfect for finding flatmates and buying and selling text books.


I am, unless postage is paid. $5.00 per page ono. Phone/text 0212596154 or 5754737 NEED MUSIC??? We are a 5 piece punk/rock band available for your party, 21st, stag do, christening, voodoo ritual etc. email WE PLAY FOR BEER!!! $$CASH!$$

food at own expense If interested contact 0273085253 FLATMATE WANTED sweet flat on old farm road so 15 min walk to uni/warehouse etc. room is small but fits a

Tutor required for NCEA Level 1 Science. Chartwell area. $20 cash an hour. Please email for more details.

queen plus some and is super sunny. looking for someone 18-22ish. $135 covers food, power, wireless broadband, phone, rent. would like someone who can clean up after themselves and is sociable. available now txt 0277275210

The Environment Centre is presenting another series of Sustainable Living evening classes, starting on Wednesday 13th August. Each session will run from 7pm – 9pm at Wintec. Bookings essential, Cost $5 per session, phone Katherine at the Environment Centre Hamilton 839 4452.

ROOM FOR RENT 5 current flatmates, 3 girls, 2 boys, $90p/w plus expenses, $180 bond required, 10min stroll to managment. bustop, bakery, takeaways, dairy etc 2 min down road. supermarket 2 min drive. room gets light in morn. drinking flat, drink most weekends. TO MOVE IN ASAP. contact kelly 0273467279


Need help typing your assignments? I will type what you write. I do not proof read or check for grammatical errors, but will type your assignments as they are written and your writing must be legible. $6.00 per typed page neg. Text 027 369 7714.

FLatmate wanted ASAP! Double bedroom available in a clean and modern flat on Nixon Street. Currently 3 gurls and 1 guy, all18-20yrs old and Uni/Tech kids. Must be clean and tidy. Rent is $86per week + expenses (food, wireless net, power, phone) Phone or txt Shelley 027 634 1138 or Kirsten 021 063 9888

Can’t get to a computer to write out your assignments? Will do limited proof reading and check for grammatical errors, but will leave as is unless asked. Will generally type assignments as they are. Must be legible, or what’s the point in giving them to me? Service offered mainly to Tauranga Students as that’s where

Flatmate wanted 1 room available in a 5 bdrm house Large room with big wardrobe Warm and sunny flat Close to shops 10 min walk to uni $99 per week - including rent and power

Room available in Student Village, Fully caterd, house keeper throught the week, cost per week is $199, inculding power and three meals a day. Cool people, lots of fun. Easy to get to uni as it is right on campus. If intrested contact Keryn on 0272571723 Flatmate wanted!! 3 bedroom house two bathrooms, double garage, one good sized room avaliable $125 p/w includes everything except food to live with 2 guys and a gurl, can do flat meals if you want, real close to uni, has a mean deck, give Justin a text on 0276973618 or call 8568613

Send notices to before Wednesday, 5 pm. Placing notices is free for students. We don’t always have much space, so get in quick! Notices cannot be any more than 75 words. We will not accept handwritten or non-electronic notices or dictation over the phone – that’s stone-age shit. If you (somehow) don’t have access to email or a computer, come into the offices and use one of our computers to type up your notice. Ta. Oh, and we hear that personals ads work terrifyingly well, so give that a go as well – fun for everyone involved. 29

Dear Agony Art I got pregnant from a guy I don’t like, but instead of having an abortion, I kept it. Haha! Well, not really, but I’m telling everyone I did because I kind of like the attention and I want this guy to shit himself with fear, haha! Do you think what I’m doing is pretty funny? Please write about me in your article! Haha! Name Withheld Dear Name Withheld You got pregnant from a guy you didn’t like, so that you could hold it over him as emotional and psychological blackmail and get attention? Maybe you’re the one who should have been aborted. That’s one of the stupidest things I’ve ever heard, but I’ll let you off because I’m assuming you have some kind of mental condition – specifically, retardation of the brain. Sure, the guy was not the smartest for putting his tadpole cannon inside of your fish-hole unprotected, but for you to then fake a pregnancy after an abortion is just outright foul. Also, having sex with people you don’t like unprotected is a good way to catch things you definitely won’t like. Chlamydia is like an unwanted baby, but without symptoms. Also, the only attention you’ll be getting is from people saying: “Pregnant, huh? For a joke, right? Wow, I wish I was just like you.

Blair Munro is never going to learn Consequences suck. There are so many things I could write about, but then I’d have to deal with more funny looks than I’m getting now, or have someone key my car, or burn and pillage my hometown, or some shit. There’s a fine line when it comes to writing things down, because you never know who may read them. I could easily fill a column with 400 words about people I hate, but then I’d have to deal with the consequences. Back in A Semester, I wrote something about T-shirts, my flatmate took it personally (even though it wasn’t really directed at them), and flipped their shit. I’m pretty sure I’ve been forgiven now, but I wouldn’t be surprised if I’m slowly getting heavy metal poisoning from when they cook for the flat. People tend not to think as far ahead as I often do, when it comes to consequences. I’ll give you an example. There are simple ones, like “If I don’t study, I’m liable to fail my University paper.” I, on the other hand, think along the lines of “If I don’t study, I’ll fail my papers, be kicked out of University, my family will disown me for it, I’ll be forced to quit whatever job I’ve managed to get, and relocate to avoid embarrassment. Then, in transit to a mountainous, secluded location,

You’ve made some really smart decisions in your life”. Due to your apparent mental condition you won’t be capable of picking up that this is sarcasm. As far as it being funny goes, here’s a list of things I do find funny. See if what you’re doing is on it: Midgets, midgets having sex, group sex with fat people, and whores from small towns who think they’re ‘all that’ when they go out to the Outback for the first time during O-Week and catch awful diseases. Nope, it doesn’t look like your ‘hilarious prank’ made it onto the list. Just because you write ‘haha’ at the end of every sentence makes that sentence Carrot Top funny, and that’s not funny at all. What I suggest you do is go and get an abortion. If you’re not going to love that child growing inside of you then you should never have it. Otherwise, stay healthy during the pregnancy and put him/her up for adoption. I just pray that you can stay off whatever you’re smoking and drinking long enough for it to have a decent shot at life. You’re a nut bar Art Yes, these letters are real (and in this case, really horrible.) To have your own Agony Art-ified, write to

I’ll be accosted by a bunch of kidnappers, who will seek ransom, which my family won’t pay, so I’ll have various body parts hacked off in a futile attempt to convince them, until I die, bones broken, flesh missing, ears ripped off, tongue cut out, cold, alone, and unwanted.” Or something like that. So, like I was saying, there’s a fine line. You have to be careful what you put on paper, especially if it’s getting published. In the movies, a diary gets made public, all hell breaks loose, and the freckled, ponytail-wearing girl becomes a pariah. In Cruel Intentions, the coked-out whore who hooks up with Selma Blair becomes an outcast. Yes, Buffy the Vampire Slayer hits the blow, and becomes shunned, all because of some wee sissy boy writing in his diary. Or, you could do what I do; just write a whole bunch of shit that’s so inane nobody could possibly take serious offence at it. It’s worked so far. Which is to say it’s won me hate mail. Fuck Steven Seagal, I’MA FIRIN’ MY LAZER!!!

31 31

Heavy Metal Carnival and Disalienation So I’m going to continue on with my series about Heavy Metal in academic literature. Here’s the next article and the reference: Halnon, K (2006). Heavy Metal Carnival and Dis-alienation: The Politics of Grotesque Realism. Symbolic Interactionism, 29(1), 33-48. If you’re a student you can access all these articles through the online Social Science databases. This article focuses on the “transgressive” nature of concerts and how looking into ‘the darker side of life’ is a way of acting out against societal pressures and feelings of alienation. By participating in ‘carnival’ complete with acts of fake blood being sprayed on the crowd etc you feel like you’re part of a community. A transgressive act of ‘acting out’ against those powers who oppress you, largely young people. It focuses on the bands GWAR, Cradle of Filth, Insane Clown Posse, Marilyn Manson and Slipknot. First off, any article that has the band GWAR in it and can talk about

Let’s start this week off with a little quiz. When buying an expensive piece of electronics with your freshly borrowed “course related costs”, do you expect to find; a) An Apple-inspired design b) Blatant branding to remind you it’s not made by Apple c) Blue LEDs, which indicate that it’s obviously high-tech If you answered C, you deserve a slap, as you’re the reason why myself and many others like me (I’ll explain) are either;


them in a positive light is awesome. When I first found this article I started waving it around to anyone who’d look due to this, even if they had no idea who I was talking about. But sadly they also mention Insane Clown Posse, a band originally signed by Disney who were trying to cash in on the Nu-Metal craze, but then later discovered that clown make-up wasn’t always going to be good for kids and dropped

“When I first found this article I started waving it around to anyone who’d look due to this, even if they had no idea who I

and that’s why we listen to Metal. No! Bad! (smacks writer with rolled up newspaper). My parents love me, people seem to like me, who am I transgressing against when I go to concerts? I’m not. I’m going because I love the music and the atmosphere. Why go to a concert to ‘transgress’ when everyone else there is going to be doing the same thing? Go to a museum and mosh if you really want to make that sort of statement. Sadly this is why Heavy Metal gets referred to as a youth culture, because youths are the most rebellious therefore they listen to rebellious music, but grow out of Heavy Metal later. I’m almost 30, and I’m not Peter Pan, so when will I grow out of it? Secondly; Insane Clown Posse... come on!

was talking about” them. Always look at the fine print and know what you’re signing up for! The fact that this article says that Heavy Metal is a community and views it positively is good. However, I have issues, and I’m not talking about Korn. Firstly it seems to view the whole of Heavy Metal as being transgressive

a) Voiding warranties by opening up things and replacing the LEDs with a more sensible colour b) Putting electrical tape over all the blue LEDs So, for those who don’t quite get my rampage, let me explain something. Blue light has a short wavelength, which makes it really hard for your eye to focus on. So, for an ambient light, like the type which alerts me to know my speakers are on, blue light is really bad in terms of overall interface design. It’s irritating to the eye. There’s a reason why you don’t normally see blue lights in car dashboards; it’s dangerous, especially for night driving. And yet, over the last few years, consumers have come to expect

Comments? or

lots of blue LEDs in their products, because it looks cool. If done correctly, there’s nothing wrong with using colour lights. But please, why do you think it’s necessary to shine blue light in my eyes when I’m just trying to listen to music? Not to mention, not only does it look “hightech” to consumers, but marketers have also decided that it sounds high-tech as well. BlueToothheadset anyone? Maybe a Blu-Ray player? When will the madness end! But, then again, most of the tech world is crap, and if it wasn’t for the sea of crap we wouldn’t have the shining stars. So really, what can one really expect from our generation?

The Hamilton International Film Festival The 31st annual Hamilton International Film Festival kicks off Thursday at Rialto Cinemas, with booze and nibbles from 7:30pm and the movie starting around 8:15pm. With the closing of Rialto in October this will be the final Festival the venue will host. The scintillating oratory of noted “Waikato Times” critic, Mr Sam Edwards, will add something a little special to the evening. Normally opening night films are amongst the

infamous backdrop: the wretched remake of “King Kong” in 1976 and Osama Bin-Liner’s great sideshow act of 2001. For reasons best known to the big city organisers, four films screen on Thursday prior to the opening event. The first of these, a Norwegian comedy called “O’Horten”, would perhaps be best enjoyed by those whose lifestyle can accommodate 11:30am sessions. The tale of enforced retirement and adaptation in the autumn of one’s years, it is directed by the extraordinarily-named Bent Hamer, whose track record is one of cult hits, including the Charles Bukowski adaptation “Factotum” and

worst offerings of any given Festival. There has been a belief in the past that the lowest common denominator has to be appealed to in order to drag the middle class punters in. Happily, 2008 sees a change in policy. “Man on Wire”, a documentary about the 1974 attempt by French tight rope walker Philippe Petit to cross the chasm between New York’s then only recently opened World Trade Centre twin towers, is a quirky, brave choice. Petit’s high wire antics are bound to be more entertaining than other cinematic uses of the

the minimalist, dead-pan “Kitchen Stories”.

I’ve been doing a little investigative journalism this week. Now, while the exact definition of ‘investigative journalism’ depends on what publication you write for and who is editing it (this year, the Nexus definition is ‘noun: anything you do while wearing a fedora’) the important thing is that you investigate something, and then write something. So I decided to find out why the Olympics were being held in a communist country. Communists typically like to share everything evenly and have nobody better or worse than everyone else, right? So why have a big contest about who is best? After a thorough canvassing of our mighty city’s opium dens I was finally able to learn the whereabouts of people who knew about communism: everywhere! So I asked everyone who looked like they might know what they were talking about, and it turns out that communism and socialism is more of an economic policy and things like personal excellence and competitive

sporting are fine, because these things aren’t economic. Who would have thought? Most people, apparently, except for one guy who reckons “in communist Russia, wealth shares you!” Chillingly accurate.

Perhaps of broader appeal - it certainly speaks to my experience - is “A Complete History of My Sexual Failures”, a documentary whose maker seeks out all his former girlfriends in order to best explain his romantic inadequacies. This sounds a tad similar to the fictional “High Fidelity” and “Broken Flowers” and apparently there are moments when the whole thing seems staged. True to life or a self-deprecating contrivance, I am expecting a hysterical

Of course we all know that if competitive sporting is anything, it’s economic. Gone are the days when our rugby representatives were farmers or butchers or builders who also happened to play world-class rugby on the weekends. Now they play rugby for a living, so suddenly money is important. The only way to keep good players is to have lots of money, so suddenly we have... a business. A business where the only way to be the best team is to have the best players, which costs lots of money. And why do these people want the best team? More advertising revenue. This of course applies to most big time sports; Cricket springs to mind locally, but don’t forget about NFL, NBA etc. The overall effect is that

account of the 21st century crisis in masculinity, like some kind of cinematic rendering of the “Agony Art” column. Animation buffs in particular will want to check out “Persepolis”, a French cartoon from an Iranian director adapting her own autobiographical novel. The advance word from those who enjoyed this in either Auckland or Wellington is that it is magnificent. A witty, sophisticated take on politics, race and religion across two diverse continents, “Persepolis” may well be the pick of the entire Festival. After Thursday there are seventeen more days of celluloid riches, a final chance to enjoy art house cinema in Hamilton’s only art house multiplex. At the very least I would advise attendance on the opening night: mention this column and I’ll shout you an extra glass of wine. (I’ll hold you to that – Ed)

the competitive edge is a little blunter. The environment has shifted from playing to be the best, to playing to win. It might sound like splitting hairs, but the distinction is there. All you are really watching in Eden Park is a bunch of guys fighting for their paycheques, in a slightly more exciting fashion that you’d get from watching a boardroom. I’m in no way saying that these people aren’t in it for the love of the game, but the fact is that priorities are different these days, and I think that is what keeps the importance in something like the Olympics. Sure, money is involved on every level and the resources of a country can impact its performance, but ultimately the athletes in these sports are in it to be the best. We get to spectate on what are typically non-spectator sports, the ones that business hasn’t sunk its claws into, which, ironically, makes it great viewing. Bar reviews are in next weeks issue, and we’ll be taking a look at the non-spectator side of our nightlife, for the above reasons. 33

the American military cannot; find the world’s most wanted man – Osama bin Laden. The impetuous for travelling to some of the most “hostile” nations on earth is the impending arrival of Morgan’s first baby. Is it safe to bring an infant into today’s world when anti-Muslim and anti-American feeling runs so high and the threat of terrorism invading people’s consciousness like never before? Where in the world is Osama bin Laden? Author: Morgan Spurlock Publisher: Harvill Secker $37.99 Reviewed by Kelly Badman You gotta love Morgan Spurlock. The man sacrificed his own health on a month long diet of nothing but McDonalds to bring us the documentary Supersize Me. Having now shed the 11 kgs gained and recovered from the liver dysfunction and depression that resulted from his Mac Attack, Morgan has decided to do the one thing that

Morgan decides to find out, starting at the scene of the largest attack on US soil since Pearl Harbour, New York City. Osama isn’t likely to be hiding there (or if he is, he has a very good disguise!) but NYC does have many experts who can give Morgan the knowledge of who Osama is and what they think makes the man tick and why extremist groups the world over have so embraced him. And so from there to England, a country that for decades lived with IRA terrorist attacks as a part of daily life, France, Egypt, Morocco, two of the most contentious countries in the Middle East Israel and Palestine, Osama’s birth country Saudi Arabia, the first battleground for the “War on Terror” –Afghanistan – and

This week, after months of rehearsal, newly formed theatre company “Carving in Ice” is presenting a production of Jeffery Hatcher’s Compleat Female Stage Beauty.

Kynaston is applauded onstage and off for his interpretations of Shakespeare’s tragic ladies: Ophelia, Cleopatra, and especially Desdemona and his/her famous ‘death scene’. But one night an unknown actress named Margaret Hughes (Pip Six) plays Desdemona at an illegal theatre. Instead of stopping the show, the evergame King Charles II (Brendan West) changes the law to allow women to act. By the stroke of a pen, Kynaston’s world is turned upside down. He loses his cachet, his livelihood, his lover and his sense of self. When women such as the King’s own courtesan, Nell Gwynn (Jessica Anderson), and Kynaston’s former dresser, Maria (Louise Blackstock), become stars, his own light disappears until fate and his desire for revenge give him a chance to take the stage again.

The play is set in the theatre world of 1660’s London and tells the story of Edward Kynaston (Richard Homan), the most famous portrayer of female roles on the London stage in 1661.

The cast includes Alec Forbes (director of many Gardens Summer Shakespeare Productions) Richard Homan (awarded the best street act at

Spotlight on: The Compleat Female Stage Beauty


the deepest, darkest lawless tribal lands of Pakistan. The book is a fabulous way to break down the misconceptions and prejudices many westerners hold towards the Muslim world. Through Morgan’s experiences we see that fundamentalism is just a tiny proportion of the population, most are the most generous kindhearted people you could hope to meet. After all, how many westerners do you know that live in such extreme poverty they are one meal away from starvation yet are willing to share their meagre food resources with a complete stranger – a stranger that some in your home land would say was your deadly enemy? And of course all this serious political and religious stuff is infused with the wonderful dry wit only Morgan Spurlock can bring. And the odd tender, emotional moment too as he thinks of his heavily pregnant wife back home. Does he answer the question of Where in the World is Osama bin Laden? Well maybe not, but sometimes the journey is more important than the destination and this is certainly true of this book. the Dunedin Fringe Festival in 2006) Graeme Cairns, and Waikato English lecturer Kirstine Moffat, alongside a cast of up and coming local talent, including many university students. Many of the cast have worked with director Gaye Poole in the highly successful productions of The Laramie Project (2006), Cosi, Half Life (2007) and Marmalade (Fuel 2008). Where: Telecom Playhouse Theatre WEL Energy Academy of Performing Arts, Gate 2B - Knighton Road, Hillcrest Hamilton When: 13 - 16 August Time: 8pm evening performances - also 2pm matinee on Sat 16 Duration: 2hrs 15mins (including interval) Cost: Adult $22 / Students $12 / Concession $18 For tickets, go to or phone 0800 383 5200

Soul Calibur IV To follow up on the Tekken 6 review from a couple of issues ago, I thought I’d cover the latest Soul Calibur title, since both games are made by Namco and are kind of like cousins in the fighting genre. The main difference between the two is a connotative one: While Tekken captures the gameplay of a brawl, Soul Calibur focuses on a duel. The main way this distinction is made is that the characters in SC use weapons. Each character’s weapon, along with their quirks, determine how they play. So, for example, the pirate who uses nunchucks has lots of flowing combos, making him hard to predict and easy to button mash, just like our pal

“the pace and dynamics are a lot faster and twitchier, just as they would be in real life if the stakes were a little higher” Eddy Gordo. To say the game is Tekken with weapons wouldn’t be fair (a round of Tekken with weapons would last about four seconds, which is why Yoshimitsu can’t just randomly clout people with his sword); the pace and dynamics are a lot faster and twitchier, just as they would be in real life if the stakes were a little higher. Tekken has a lot of wakeup game, where you tend to fight your way to your feet but considerations like “kick him as I get up” vs “ roll away” tend to lose meaning when there’s a 6-foot-six German dude trying to drop a giant sword on you. So, the new edition. The main gameplay improvement this time around is a sharp increase in the pace of the game. Blocking is obviously an important feature in a weapons combat game, but things can stall if the game turns into one person going very defensive, so a gauge has been added that slowly wears down as you block. You still don’t take any damage, but eventually when the gauge wears down your opponent can activate

their finishing move and its round (not game) over. It’s worth noting that even though there are plenty of indicators to let you know you’ve been blocking too much, the finishing state does not happen often. Even in (the default) “best of five” rounds, I’ve only ever seen a couple of finishers – the effect is to encourage tactical blocking, not to discourage it altogether. Another great new thing happens when you don’t block. As you take hits to the head, torso, or legs, your armour will wear down and eventually break off, leaving your character slightly weaker in the exposed location, but also a bit faster. This obviously gets quite entertaining, especially with the larger-than-life female characters, but it remains in more or less decent taste, with the possible exception of a certain lady’s outfit. It’s also funny even if you lose because sometimes the other guy will have to do his victory pose in his underpants. Combine this with the best custom character maker around for great times. Mentioning the Star Wars guest characters nearly warrants a whole review, but I’ll just say that the characters are very faithfully and adeptly translated, as out of place as they seem. Overall, the game is another strong entry in the series, and with some DLC planned for both the PS3 and 360 versions, it will have a lot of life in it. 35


These films will be playing on the 16th and 28th of August. Check for further details, as well as information on the various other films playing from the 14th to 31st of August this year.

Ronnie Grimble:

Eel Girl:


For those with no experience of Mark Hadlow, here is your chance. A lonely but creepy man, desperate for friends, uses a sickening method to lure visitors into his home. Here, in his artdeco drawing room, he does his best to relate to and befriend his ‘victims’. This film, entirely in one small room, is a great example of what a veteran actor can do with a small amount of time and space.

In a future (or a now we don’t want to discover) where science has gone mad, a scientist becomes obsessed with his titular subject. His desires for inhuman contact do not end well. This piece has surprisingly excellent special effects for a short film and leaves you with the feeling that you’ve somehow been violated. It will also put you off seafood and sex for a while.

Unusual subject matter for a New Zealand short film, with an even more peculiar delivery. It is about a slave trader in modern-day Eastern Europe who befriends a piece of his ‘cargo’, saving him from slavery but delivering him into the position of accomplice. What’s so odd about this film, when compared to the other films in the New Zealand short film showcase, is that it was shot outside of New Zealand and scripted entirely in eastern European languages. It’s bleak and Spartan style do it a service.

The Graffiti of Mr Tupaia:

Coffee and Allah:

A Cook Island Maori cleaner in an intermediate finds the words ‘I want to die’ scribbled in a hidden place in a toilet cubicle. His decision to write back begins a journey which leads him to discover that not all children have perfect upbringings. This film is nearly without dialogue, with he mot important words being those written in pen on the walls of the toilet.

By far my favourite of the New Zealand short film selection. A female Ethiopian Muslim plays badminton, buys coffee and experiences cultural and linguistic chasms between recent immigrants to New Zealand (especially from cultures as alien as the Islamic cultures) and those who immigrated a little bit before.

Take 3:


Three Asian New Zealanders struggle to get work as actresses, but find that all the roles are Asian clichés: the bitch doctor, the naughty school girl or the martial arts princess. This film was both hilarious and perfectly shot, with a hilarious and cathartic finale involving a stupid casting director and a Vietnamese brothel.

by Carl Watkins

Faces come out in the rain Remember last week I was telling you about the Mammoth Band Experiments ‘08? Well, I have an update for ya. First prize for the competition has been finalized and includes as follows. A PA from dB Technologies, 500 CD’s Pressed from Amstore, 3 Days recording and mixing of a single at Dudley Studios, and a paid gig during O-Week ‘09. Entries close at the end of this month or when they have 16 bands entered. So hurrup ow! Contact: or go to Conan Mockasin (formerly of Conan and the Mockasins) has been having fun in the UK. Whilst there the recently returned Welly rocker did a stint of acting (as himself) in the Alexis Dos Santos film ‘Unmade Beds’; plus he recorded a song with Norman Cook (Fatboy Slim) which comes out this September on Cook’s new album ‘Brighton Port Authority’. The album also features Iggy Pop, Martha Wainwright and David Byrne, excellent company. Conan has also been working on a soundtrack for local short film ‘Six Dollar Fifty Man’, as well as building electric mechanical instruments to take back to the UK.

From the “look out for these fullas file… Also from Wellington, and distributed by Rhythmethod, are 3-piece Thought Creature, who have just dropped their anticipated debut album ‘Teleport Palace’ on Involve Records. Sounds like…? Syd Barrett, Bauhaus and Joy Division, Sonic Youth and Fugazi, and stuff. Thought Creature are bass-driven, psychedelic, definitely post-punk tinged and can wallop your ears in several different time signatures. What do you get when you cross dub and the NZSO? Find out on Monday 22nd September when Salmonella Dub release the Feel The Seasons Change Album through Virgin Records. Feel The Seasons Change combines Salmonella Dub’s contemporary music and production values with Te Reo Maori, the ancient arts of taonga puoro, and the New Zealand Symphony Orchestra’s classical tradition. Special guest performances include Whirimako Black; the haunting sounds of renowned taonga puoro expert Richard Nunns; and leading electronic musician Paddy Free of Pitch Black. The album captures a live performance at Auckland’s Aotea Centre on the 1st February 2008, of compositions from Dub’s recent release Heal Me and other old favourites.

THE EARTH BENEATH OUR FEET Dr Megan Balks Department of Earth and Ocean Sciences What do you know of the earth beneath your feet? Do you see it as dirt? Do you take it for granted? Have you thought (lately, or ever) about ways in which your life depends on the soil resource? The great majority of the food we eat is derived from the soil. New Zealand’s soil resource directly underpins about half of our export income, and underlies all our houses, roads, and rugby fields! Like snowflakes, no two soils are the same. While soil, on first impression, seems a fairly simple material, soils are in fact astounding in their complexity, diversity, and resilience. I have had the privilege of visiting soils in places as diverse as Australia and Antarctica, Russia and Rotorua, Taumarunui and Thailand. In all these places I have seen evidence of degradation inflicted on the soils over the last 50 years as a result of human activity. Plato, writing in Greece about 2400 years ago, on the effects of erosion caused by deforestation and poor management of hill lands, said “what now remains of the formerly rich land is like the skeleton of a sick man, with all the fat and soft earth having wasted away and only the bare framework remaining. Formerly, many of the mountains were arable. The plains that were full of rich soil are now marshes. Hills that were once covered with forests and produced abundant pasture now produce only food for bees. Once the land was enriched by yearly rains, which were not lost as they are now, by flowing off the bare land into the sea. The soil was deep, it absorbed and kept the water in the loamy soil and the water that soaked into the

hills fed springs and running streams everywhere. Now the abandoned shrines at spots where formerly there were springs attest that our description of the land is true.” On August 6th 2008 the human population on the planet reached 6 714 827 439 ( html) - that is twice as many people as the planet was supporting just 40 years ago. A mere 100 million people were estimated to be alive at the time of Plato 2400 years ago. This year we have seen both food and energy prices rise substantially. Our soil resource is under increasing pressure not only to provide food for a population that increases by the size of Hamilton city every 14 hours, but also to provide energy (as biofuels). The soil has potential to act as a large sink, or source, for CO2, depending upon how it is managed, and it has an important role in disposing of our wastes and recycling the nutrients that are vital to life on earth. The degradation that Plato observed in Greece 2400 years ago began in New Zealand only about 150 years ago. We need to be careful to learn the lessons of the past. We need to use our scientific, social science, and management skills to develop our knowledge and to nurture and manage our soils so they may continue to provide the vital services that support life on planet earth. Maanaki whenua, maanaki tangata, haerze whakamua! Care for the land, care for the people, go forward! 37

Compiled by Maria Mo Listings courtesy of and Hamilton Community Arts Council Wednesday 13th-Saturday 16th, 8pm: The production of Compleat Female Stage Beauty at the Telecom Playhouse, WEL Academy of Performing Arts, University of Waikato. Set in 1660; written in 2000. Ned Kynaston was the most famous portrayer of female roles on the London stage in 1660. He was a celebrity, applauded onstage and off for his portrayal of Shakespeare’s tragic ladies, especially Desdemona. He’s the toast of the town and the secret ‘mistress’ of the Duke of Buckingham. Described to be “an intimate psycho-sexual backstage historical comedy. Splendidly theatrical, it’s a witty allusive game with some feeling pay-off to boot.” by The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, it stars the University’s theatre students under the direction of Gaye Poole. Bookings to be made at Ticketdirect, 08003835200 Cost: $12 Students, $18 Concession, $22 Full Thu 14 Aug 2008 - Sun 31 Aug 2008: The 31st Hamilton International Film Festival A selection of up to thirty films travel to twelve provincial cities, beginning with the university towns of Hamilton and Palmerston North. The 31st edition is notable for containing some of the most pointedly violent films ever shown as well as several of the most clever and thoughtful comedies of human nature. Cost: From $14.50 to $8 Time: Various Where: Rialto Cinemas, Centreplace Further details: International Film Festival Hamilton Blues Society Jam Sessions Jam is open to anyone so bring your Instrument and have a go, PA supplied. Monthly | Thu 14thAugust 2008 Cost: Free Time: 8pm Where: Biddy Mulligans, 742 Victoria St


Further details: Pauline Sinel 021 109 5630 National Country Music Awards This event will present some of this country’s best young performers supported by artists New Zealand has long appreciated. Artists performing: Suzanne Prentice, Roger Tibbs, Celine Toner, Kevin Greaves, Aaron Jury, Jasmine Rae (Australia), Ashley Cooper, Nadine Newman-Dempster, Neil McKenzie-Hall and Phil Doublet. Sat 16 Aug 2008 Cost: Reserved Seating Time: 8pm Where: Founders Theatre, 221 Tristram St Further details: Barbershop Concert featuring the Waikato Rivertones Support our Young Women In Harmony, Extra Shot and Espresso from Diocesan School for Girls, Straight From The Heart from Sacred Heart Girls College and Ebony from Hillcrest High School who are representing the Waikato at The New Zealand Nationals in Wellington! There will also be raffles at the venue. Tue 12 Aug 2008 Cost: $5 Time: 7.30pm Where: Waikato Diocesan School Chapel, 660 River Road Further details: Lynn Jamieson 027 438 1750 UNMASKED - Faith Thomas Faith Thomas goes 3D. An exciting exhibition where well known waikato artist Faith Thomas releases her first body of 3D work. Meet the artist evening Friday 8th August - 5pm onwards - All Welcome Mon 04 Aug 2008 - Sat 23 Aug 2008 Cost: Free Time: 10 - 5pm Tues-Fri, 10-3pm Sat&Sun

Where: The Empire Gallery, Cnr. Empire & Alpha Sts, Cambridge (turn of SH1 at Countdown) Further details: The Empire Gallery 07 827 3227 info@ August Woodwinds Bay Classic Soloists present August Woodwinds with Musical Director David Adlam. Performing Rautavaara, Mozart, Adlam and Haydn. Sun 17 Aug 2008 Cost: $25 Adults, $10 Children Time: 2.30pm Where: Academy of Performing Arts, University of Waikato, Gate 2b Knighton Rd, Hillcrest Further details: Tauranga Performing Arts Bookings 0800 383 5200 - www. The Trons: All-Robot Hamilton band The Trons are playing their first Auckland show Thursday 14th August 9pm at Dogs Bollix. With Edward Gains and Doteyes supporting. $10 entry for Humans, $7 for robots High Society Drum and Bass Presents MC Tiki and MC Rolex supported by DJ’s Advokit, Felun and High Speed Dubbing (31 Records) Kremlin Bar Victoria street (just north of the collingwood street lights) Saturday August 16 2008 From 10pm There is a $10 cover charge on the door High Society Drum and Bass Face book member it will only cost you a Fiver

issue 16  

Into It: The Hamilton Drum and Bass scene 11 August 2008

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