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Letters ........................... 3 Opinion/Streetalk ........... 5 Sheila Leslie ................... 6 Brendan trainor............. 7 News ............................. 8 green ........................... 11 Feature ........................ 13 Arts&Culture ............... 16 Art of the State ............ 19

Foodfinds .................... 20 Film............................. 22 Musicbeat ................... 23 Nightclubs/Casinos ...... 24 this Week ....................27 Free Will Astrology ...... 30 15 Minutes .................... 31 Bruce Van Dyke ........... 31

MythEd thE Point

See Left Foot Forward, page 6.

You trY Harder WHen You’re number tHree See News, page 8.

Big Art LittLe Pictures See Arts&Culture, page 16.

to tEll thE truth See Film, page 22.

RENo’s NEws & ENtERtaiNmENt wEEkly

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VolumE

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December 5, 2013


Send letters to renoletters@newsreview.com

Down to the finish line

Do the math

Welcome to this week’s Reno News & Review. Thanks to everyone who responded to my column last week. Five different people called, beginning on Thanksgiving morning. Between that sentence and this, I just got another. We did indeed find Neal C. Kirk, and on Monday, he spoke to his brother for the first time in 56 years. I only tell you this so you don’t have to roust the poor guy anymore. Well, I do think it’s pretty cool. Silly me, I didn’t bother to check my voicemail while I was off for the long weekend. I just figured word would come over email. Anyway, as I said before, I only knew the guy for a minute a couple of years ago. I’m pretty sure he doesn’t know my name, and he’s unlikely to remember me. I once gave him a business card; he saw the ‘D’ and decided it stood for doctor. It just wasn’t worth explaining to him. So what do I know about what’s going to happen with him and his family? Little. Things like incredibly long separations take time to heal, and while it seems possible, or even probable, that one family member or the other will travel to Reno to see Nealand (I don’t know how to spell this, but this is how his sister-in-law kept referring to him), I won’t be surprised if it doesn’t happen. I’m hoping for the best, even though I don’t know what the “best” is. Anyway, I don’t want to further violate his privacy except to wish him and his family the best. Unless, of course, he meets up with his family members. Then maybe I’ll have something more to say, and I’ll get to tell you all about it. *** I hope you all had a nice Thanksgiving. I did. Took two whole days to be really off from work and school. Some great people came over and helped me drink Brian’s Perfect Eggnog, which is a famous cocktail I developed over years of diligent testing. I ate turkey and stuffing and Dutch bread and pie and drank red wine. And now, I’ve got about 10 days in which to implode my brain while I try to do my final papers for the semester.

Re “Vet” (15 Minutes, Nov. 14): He says he is 75 years old and was a gunner on a recoilless 106 anti tank gun. You kids down there at Reno News & Review might be shocked to hear that there is this thing called mathematics, and his numbers don’t add up. The Korean war started in 1950 and ended in 1953, which, through the miracle of subtraction, tells us that war happened between 60 and 63 years ago. A man who is 75 years old today would have been between the ages of 13 and 15 years old during that war. Last time I checked, the U.S. armed forces didn’t allow 13-year-olds to enlist. Chris Rosamond Truckee

Who do you think you’re reading, anyway? Re “Boycott Thanksgiving Sales” (Editorial, Nov. 21): Go eat your turkey in peace and quit trying to model other people’s lives to your sublime notions of a model society. Dean Chaney Sun Valley

Muy bueno Re “Going back to caliente” (Foodfinds, Nov. 21): Dave Preston’s review of Rigo’s Mexican Cuisine restaurant was spot on. We have been customers of Rigo’s for as long as he has been open. We have enjoyed eating at his restaurant at least once or twice a week. Rigo prides himself on using fresh natural ingredients. His menu items are mostly prepared from scratch. His family recipes are very authentic Mexican, Inca and Aztec food served in a family friendly atmosphere. It is at a location difficult to find the first time, but well worth the effort—at the northwest corner of East Prater Way and Sparks Boulevard in the Hacienda Shopping Center in Sparks.

Our Mission To publish great newspapers that are successful and enduring. To create a quality work environment that encourages people to grow professionally while respecting personal welfare. To have a positive impact on our communities and make them better places to live.

His seafood items are the greatest. We especially enjoy his salsa and chips. Kudos to Dave for his article. It is an accurate portrayal of Rigo’s. Glen and Roberta Godfrey Sparks

Yeah, no kidding Re “2013 Thanksgiving Family Guide” (Supplement, Nov. 7): Thank you for publishing the “2013 Thanksgiving Family Guide.” So far, it has been the only public acknowledgment I have seen of the Thanksgiving holiday. I wonder if anyone else noticed that the Jack-o-Lanterns were still brightly grinning on the front steps when corporate America unleashed its annual barrage of Christmas marketing. Time was, the Christmas shopping season did not officially begin until after Santa’s arrival in Herald Square, and that seemed a decent compromise: to wait until Thanksgiving for the madness to begin. But now, it seems, corporate management has decided to eliminate Thanksgiving from the canon of American holidays, and the reason is obvious: aside from the loss-leader ads for Butterball turkeys in the supermarket, they still have not figured out a way to make money from it. And, as we all know, nothing is of any value if doesn’t make a buck. Life in America has become just one long series of marketing events. We begin the year with the Super Bowl, followed quickly by Valentine’s Day. It then moves on to Easter and into the summer “grilling season.” At the end of summer, there is back to school, followed closely by Halloween and now, it seems, Christmas. Words only have the meaning that we give to them. Now, we have Black Friday all year long; it has become a code word for “get out there and spend.” Hopefully, Christmas itself will not suffer the same fate. Ahh, the joys of life in a freemarket Capitalist society. God save us. Bill Nickerson Reno

Editor/Publisher D. Brian Burghart News Editor Dennis Myers Arts Editor Brad Bynum Calendar Editor Kelley Lang Editorial Intern Sage Leehey Contributors Amy Alkon, Chanelle Bessette, Megan Berner, Mark Dunagan, Bob Grimm, Ashley Hennefer, Sheila Leslie, Dave Preston, Jessica Santina, K.J. Sullivan, Kris Vagner, Bruce Van Dyke, Allison Young

Creative Director Priscilla Garcia Art Director Hayley Doshay Junior Art Director Brian Breneman Design Vivian Liu, Serene Lusano, Marianne Mancina, Skyler Smith Advertising Consultants Meg Brown, Gina Odegard, Bev Savage Senior Classified Advertising Consultant Olla Ubay Office/Distribution Manager/ Ad Coordinator Karen Brooke Executive Assistant/Operations Coordinator Nanette Harker

—D. Brian Burghart

brian b@ n ewsreview . com

The hooker will see you now

Your article on concierge medicine did a great job of describing and analyzing a very worrisome development in family/primary care medicine in America. Senior citizens, my wife and I live in a firmly middle-class community in Maryland, halfway between Baltimore and Washington, D.C. Some five years ago, concierge or boutique medicine came to our locality. Judging by the letters to the local weekly newspaper, a lot of people were not happy about it—including my wife and I—because we really liked our doctors but decided to go elsewhere when their medical practice announced that it was going “boutique.” Sometime after that, when we had found another medical practice that offered primary care via the “traditional” way (i.e., insurance-based), we learned that our old doctors had decided not to go boutique/concierge after all—they announced that they were suspending their decision for a while, and in the end, my old doctor did not switch to the concierge model. However, the concierge model never did go away, and some docs in our town are doing business that way. Ironically, our new doctor recently switched to a homeopathic model and left the new primary care practice where we had originally sought refuge. So, we began a new search for primary care. As a retired federal civil servant, I have chosen to subscribe to both Medicare and good secondary health insurance (the latter being The Federal Employee Program, which is excellent but not inexpensive). The search for new doc No. 2 was successful but unnerving as well as sad, since we realized that issues about supply, demand and ability to pay are indeed taking center stage in our nation’s health care system. Harold Holzman Columbia, Md.

Re “The doctor won’t see you now” (Feature story, Nov. 28): I love the “cup of coffee per day” example. Yeah, go to the Star of the Megabucks, and for the price of a cup of coffee per day, you can buy a new Mini or get a new bike or get married or get a divorce or go to the doctor. So what is next? For the price of a cup of coffee per day, maybe you could, just maybe, get an actual cup of coffee? C’mon. We are just being asked to pay to leave others outside and not actually to get anything that we were not already getting. But I guess you do what you have to do. Now I’m gonna make myself a cup of coffee before I have to pay me 160 bucks per month to let me make a cup of coffee. David R. Gomez Reno

It’s all in the bottom line Re “The doctor won’t see you now” (Feature story, Nov. 28): There is a math issue here. The article claims that two-thirds of the $1,600 a year for 600 patients goes back to the doctor and that amounts to $125,000 a year? Well, 600 patients at $1,600 each is $960,000. Two of that is $640,000. So ... where is the rest of the money going? If they were really sending two-thirds of the money back to the doctor, and $125,000 is what the doctor was OK with then that would mean they could charge 1.5 times $125,000 or $187,500 spread among 600 patients is $312 a year per patient. So is MDVIP overcharging its patients? Ken Mela Sparks Editor’s note: It appears your equation does not include the doctor’s costs of running a medical practice, which is factored into the deal with MDVIP.

Hide your shame

Good job on medical story

Re “The doctor won’t see you now” (Feature story, Nov. 28): You should be ashamed of yourself for presenting such a sketchy article that involves two doctors and

Re “The doctor won’t see you now” (Feature story, Nov. 28):

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December 5, 2013


by Dennis Myers

THiS ModeRn WoRld

by tom tomorrow

Do you consider Reno hip? Asked at Wildflower Village, 4395 W. Fourth St.

James Dilworth Filmmaker

I think that Reno is hip if you compare it to places like Oakdale and Sacramento and that kind of place.

Mary Sauvola Retiree

Yes, I do. I love the art scene. I like Midtown. I like the restaurants. I think it’s great.

Sandra Kell Retiree

Above the inFLUence Among the annual public service announcements in this editorial space is the “flu etiquette” editorial. Amid other things we say every year, we strongly advise an annual flu shot, but we also recognize that some people strenuously disagree with this notion. One of our staff members gets one. One of our staff members believes he gets sick every time he gets one. Another of our staff members believes he got a multi-year flu shot a few years ago, but we’re not going to break the news to him that there is no such thing. According to flu.gov, there are many things a person can, and should, do to avoid contracting the flu. There are steps you can take in your daily life to help protect you from getting the flu. • Wash your hands often with soap and water or an alcohol-based hand rub. • Avoid touching your eyes, nose or mouth. Germs spread this way. • Try to avoid close contact with sick people. • Practice good health habits. Get plenty of sleep and exercise, manage your stress, drink plenty of fluids, and eat healthy food. Here are the same website’s suggestions on how to avoid spreading the flu. • Cover your nose and mouth with a tissue when you cough or sneeze. Throw the tissue in the trash after you use it. • If you are sick with flu-like illness, stay home for at least 24 hours after your fever is gone without the use of fever-reducing medicine. WebMD offers some other clues as to how doctors avoid cold and flu germs. OPINION

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Yes, because of all the cultural events that are emerging in this town. I’ve been here for 40 years, and I really think it’s getting more hip.

• Avoid public surfaces like computer keyboards, telephones, doorknobs, pens that are given to you when you sign for a credit card purchase (or to fill out forms in a doctor’s office) • Exercise to increase your immune system • Health.com also has some good suggestions. • Avoid that holiday dip when you’re visiting friends. Double-dippers, you know. • Quit smoking. • Dispose of all your used tissues yourself.

Kat Ballou Social media consultant

It’s getting there. And it seems to me it’s changing in a very positive way and becoming more hip.

The Centers for Disease Control has some pretty good advice at http://www.cdc.gov/flu/. Top advice (after getting an annual flu shot): Try to avoid contact with sick people. Good to know. So, what’s all this mean, and why do we care enough to devote an annual editorial to flu prevention? The bottom line is that each flu season, nearly 111 million workdays are lost due to the flu. That equals approximately $7 billion per year in sick days and lost productivity. And yet, our culture both rewards those who come to work or school or the grocery store with the flu and punishes those who try to stay home. For example, some restaurants require employees to either come to work with the flu or not to work again until they pay for a doctor’s excuse to say they’re healthy. Most people don’t go to the doctor for a simple flu—often doctors are booked up for month—which sends those people to urgent care or even the emergency room for an excuse, but more likely they just set out your eating utensils while they’re contagious. Seems like the season for a change. Ω |

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Guy Louis Rocha Historian

By Northern Nevada standards? Yes, Reno would be hip. Is it hip compared to Seattle, Portland, San Francisco, Davis, Santa Barbara, Sante Fe, Boulder and points east? No. There’s enclaves in Reno [that are hip].

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And yet, the myth persists Business, Nevada is rated 36th in the country. While our state placed very well in business costs (No. 5), other rankings caused our overall status to plummet, including an educated workforce/labor supply (No. 40), quality of life (No. 47) and economic climate (No. 50). Our elected officials keep trying to entice businesses here with tax incentives that are greedily gobbled up. Yet we see the jobs go elsewhere. One need look no further than the latest multi-million dollar giveaway to Apple, a corporation that bargained hard for a huge tax rebate and then announced it would create thousands of construction and manufacturing jobs. In Arizona. Nevertheless, our leaders cling to the idea that miniscule business taxes strengthens our economy, while ignoring the damage our high sales tax inflicts on low-income residents. Nevada clearly has failed to thrive under the persistent strategy of extremely low business taxes. But no one seems to be able to convince the Emperor he has no clothes.

It’s obvious the Legislature will never be able to reach the two-thirds threshold needed to pass a broadbased corporate tax, even at a very low rate. Recognizing that fact, teachers and progressive groups are supporting the Education Initiative, a version of a corporate margins tax, on the 2014 ballot. Amid the hand-wringing and dire predictions, it’s easy to lose sight of the fact that 47 other states have already implemented some sort of broad-based corporate tax and most of them score higher than Nevada in business success. In fact, Texas, a state with a bustling economy has a similar margins tax and currently ranks as No. 7 in the Forbes survey. In a recent opinion column in The New York Times, Professor Lawrence Jacobs from the Humphrey School of Public Affairs at the University of Minnesota, compared two Midwestern states that took very different political approaches to revenue and spending in the last several years.

Think Free

It’s one of those “truths” that needs no proof in Nevada. We must maintain our high national ranking as a low-tax, pro-business state in order to attract new high-quality companies. Any potential threat to that status spells catastrophe. Nevada has no personal income by tax like most states and no broadSheila Leslie based corporate tax like 47 other states. Our Modified Business Tax has been weakened so many times, most businesses don’t even pay it. Nevada typically ranks in the top three states for “business climate” despite our chronic high unemployment rate and bottom of the barrel rankings for just about any quality of life issue such as education or human services. Indeed, Nevada ranked third in the Tax Foundation’s 2014 State Business Tax Climate Index, behind Wyoming and South Dakota, the other two states with no corporate income tax. But digging just a little deeper, the myth of low taxes/high prosperity disintegrates. In the Forbes 2013 List of the Best States for

Wisconsin, led by the combative governor, Scott Walker, focused on destroying collective bargaining rights while also reducing taxes and tightening the budget, cutting K-12 education by more than 15 percent. Wisconsin had hoped to add 250,000 new jobs in the private sector, but currently ranks 34th in the nation for job growth with just 90,000 new jobs. Minnesota, on the other hand, led by a progressive new governor, Mark Dayton, boldly raised taxes by $2.1 billion, targeting the wealthiest 1 percent of the state’s earners who paid 62 percent of the new taxes. The state invested much of the new funding in all levels of education, including early childhood. Minnesota now has the fifth fastest growing state economy, and earned a ranking of No. 8 on the Forbes list. So how about it Nevada? We know that the low tax, low education funding combo doesn’t work. Let’s learn from our past and try a new approach to success. Ω

Here’s the list: www. forbes.com/beststates-for-business/ list.

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Call For Showing: 775-622-8835 6   |  RN&R   | 

DECEMBER 5, 2013


The grassroots are on fire Fault lines in the Nevada Republican Party were revealed this November, as an email exchange escalated to Gov. Brian Sandoval’s cancellation of a public appearance in Northern Nevada. “Conversations from the Capitol” moderated by Washoe County Chair Tom Taber, the by Brendan weekly Republican talk show on FM 99.1, featured a lengthy discusTrainor sion of women in the workplace on Nov. 2 that was dubbed “Caveman Radio” by eagerly tweeting pundit Jon Ralston. The discussion, led by Sierra Sage publisher Len Semas, consisted of a litany of troubling signs of the decline of the American family. Complaints included the number of female graduates from colleges compared to males, as well as the number of kids who turn out bad due to ambitious parents dumping them into daycare. There were references to the number of children with ADHD. There was even a reference to kids “building bombs in the garage.” Were the Boston Marathon bombers the product of too little maternal

nurturing? Apparently, as the rise of women in the workforce was blamed for the “lack of nurturing” that leads to these problems. On the other hand, District 31 Assembly candidate Jill Dickman worked to restore balance by asserting that the rise in working women was because society has been male dominated for so long. She even suggested that maybe male domination was a cause of too many wars! This show, while amusing at times, touched on legitimate conservative concerns. Some women find they really can’t do it all, or choose not to have kids and later regret that choice. The liberal war on males is a conservative theme just as legitimate as the conservative war on women is to liberals. Libertarians want a frank cultural acknowledgment of tradeoffs and consequences. Personal, peaceful life choices should not be subsidized, mandated or forbidden by the state. Politicizing these personal choices does more harm than good.

Then Washoe County Commissioner Martha Berkbigler (R-Dist 1) put her “ability to clarify and resolve polarizing issues” to work by submitting a letter published in the Reno GazetteJournal pining for the good old days of “Grandma’s GOP” when women were truly welcome in the party! That started a flurry of emails between her and local Republicans, wherein she called the show’s participants “Neanderthals.” Sen. Dean Heller and Sandoval got into the fray, issuing hasty statements that of course they were for women’s rights, and Republicans were not Neanderthals at all. (OK, that’s not what they said, but their knee jerk response could just as well have.) Sandoval went so far as to cancel his appearance at a Northern Nevada fundraiser. This upset local activists the most. The grassroots and the establishment, otherwise known as the “Tea Party Whacko Birds” and the “Establishment RINO Sellouts,” are at odds in Nevada and across

the country. Nevada has many activists who were abused at the shut down 2008 Nevada Republican Convention and who defied the Republican National Convention in 2012 by casting votes for Ron Paul. Romney’s establishment campaign later went nowhere. They have hung on and worked hard to grow the Republican Party in a small government direction. The establishment fears their policies will reduce the party’s contributions, especially from the military industrial corporate donors at the top of their Rolodexes. Many expect Sandoval to challenge Sen. Harry Reid in 2016. Is the governor signaling his displeasure at some grassroots conservative views? Does Heller agree? Or is it that the establishment simply wants to remind any insurgents that they are still in charge? If so, they may find they are in charge of an even smaller Republican Party. Ω

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PHOTO/DENNIS MYERS

Voters seem perpetually disgusted with          politicians. How bad does it have to be before  they look to a new party?

Numbers game The Sandoval administration, which runs Nevada’s health care exchange that implements the federal Affordable Care Act, has refused to release running tallies on how many people are applying and being served. But numbers are being released, anyway, through other sources—particularly the federal Health and Human Services Department (HHS). HHS has issued a report showing 9,186 Nevadans have completed applications, another 14,819 have completed applications and applied for coverage, and 1,217 have received coverage. Various media entities who are trying to track numbers state by state have had difficulty getting numbers from the state and have used other numbers, including the Kaiser Family Foundation and the Washington Post. Kaiser spokesperson Chris Lee said, “We haven’t had any luck getting data from Nevada yet, either.” He said Kaiser is relying on the HHS numbers.

Supremes rule The Nevada Supreme Court has ruled against Sparks City Councilmember Mike Carrigan in his latest round with the Nevada Ethics Commission. The court had previously supported Carrigan when he argued that the Ethics Commission interfered with his freedom of expression by admonishing him for voting on a casino project supported by his campaign manager (“Ethics or expression,” RN&R, April 28, 2011). The city attorney had advised him he could vote. But the U.S. Supreme Court overruled the Nevada Supreme Court, finding that an officeholder’s vote “symbolizes nothing” and so is not protected free expression. Carrigan then returned to court and argued that the Nevada statute dealing with conflict-of-interest recusal is unconstitutionally vague, thus violating due process, and that it unconstitutionally burdens freedom of association between elected officials and their supporters. The court disagreed with Carrigan on both counts. The case is Carrigan v. Commission on Ethics. In another case, the Nevada court upheld the Nevada press shield statute in a matter where Aspen Financial Services tried to force a television news producer, Dana Gentry, to testify in an action against guests who appeared on a show she produced. Lawyers for the corporation argued they were not subpoenaing her as a news producer, but in her personal capacity. The court ruled that the corporation used a subterfuge—a claim that she had accepted gifts that compromised her news judgment—to try to learn her sources, which is barred by the law. “[A]lthough Aspen claims that it is not seeking Gentry’s sources because it already knows who those sources are, the circumstances of this case demonstrate that Aspen actually is effectively seeking to confirm the identities of Gentry’s sources,” the court ruled. The case is Aspen Financial Services v. Eighth Judicial District Court and Dana Gentry.

Obstacles Libertarian leader’s angst shows third party handicaps “WEAVER CAPTURES NEVADA” read the headline in the New York Times on November 10, 1892. by It was a first-and-only moment Dennis Myers in the state’s history. People’s Party presidential nominee James Weaver, running on the Nevada Silver Party line, won the state’s electoral votes in a landslide. Though the Times said he won only a plurality, in fact he swept up a massive majority, swamping his three opponents and their parties combined.

“This could very well be that rare occasion in American history.” Rhodes Cook Political analyst

From the right It may come as a shock to those who think the state is experiencing the second term of the Gibbons administration, but Brian Sandoval is under fire for being too liberal. Clark County Republican Central Committee member Edward Hamilton said he is entering the primary race for governor against incumbent Sandoval because “[he] is more liberal than the two Democratic leaders in the Nevada Legislature, Assembly Speaker [Marilyn] Kirkpatrick and state Senate majority leader [Mo] Denis. Sandoval is pro-sales and gasoline taxes increases, pro-Obamacare expansion in Nevada. He signed into law three fast-tracking bills to launch and implement Obamacare in Nevada, pro-abortion; and pro-big government agenda in general. … In summary, Governor Sandoval is out touch with the conservative base and liberty faction of the GOP in Nevada, especially in the north and rural counties.” Hamilton also calls himself a tea party candidate. He has run for office before, including a 2010 U.S. Senate race as a Democrat.

—Dennis Myers 8   |  RN&R   | 

DECEMBER 5, 2013

Libertarian leader Joseph Silvestri’s statement can be read at http://votesilvestri. com/8-i-need-a-breakfolks

It happened once. Could it happen again? Not if Joseph Silvestri is to be believed. Two days before the Libertarian Party of Nevada held a Nov. 16 state convention, party chair Joseph Silvestri posted a message on his website: “After more than a decade trying to help build the LPN into a viable political organization that could compete with the establishment parties, and get Libertarians elected, I have conceded defeat. I’ve grown tired of (fill in the blank), the list is endless. … In the past, I’ve worked to support myself and a team of

quality activists get elected and work to grow the party. But not this time, I’m done. I’ve decided to not seek any officer position. Unable to build a large enough coalition of support to justify further efforts, I accept reality. I yield the field to the knuckleheads. I am exhausted from the endless stupid drama that prevents our party from achieving critical mass. … You should understand I don’t really blame the knuckleheads. I blame the good decent folks who really want to see a viable third choice on Election Day, but do nothing to further that end.” With 10,729 registered voters, the Libertarians are the state’s fourth largest political party. The Libertarians, unlike other third parties like the American Independent and Reform parties, was built around a philosophy, not a candidate. But neither method seems to be a good route to the mainstream, at least in the modern era. One commentator thinks that might be changing. National political analyst Rhodes Cook put the possibility of a third party on the cover of his latest Rhodes Cook Letter, and observed: “Any new third party nowadays would likely come from one of two sources—another split in Republican ranks with the ‘Tea Party’ veering off from the party establishment; or a Perot-like entity carved out of the disaffected political center. No doubt, creating a viable third party from either source would not be easy.

Elections at the federal and state levels continue to grow more and more expensive. And ballot access can be consuming enough for an independent or third party presidential candidate, let alone for a party that is also running scores of candidates for Congress and other offices. … But it would probably not be impossible in an era when the two major parties appear to be continually dropping the ball. In short, this could very well be that rare occasion in American history when it just could happen.” Others say the obstacles are greater than the disgust with the existing choices. “Insurmountable,” political analyst Fred Lokken said. “You’d think voters would want to shake the tree, but we just don’t. … Sure there are voters who are disgruntled with Republicans and Democrats, but they don’t generally vote for third parties.” One of the biggest obstacles to third parties is election laws. In most states, the dominant political parties have reduced access to the ballot through a myriad of signature requirements or other mechanisms. Indeed, election laws have given political parties primacy over those who want straight politics without parties. For example, state presidential electors—the members of the electoral “college,” though there is no actual collegial group—are now selected by political parties, instead of by the voting public or legislatures, as originally done by the founding generation. And in many states including Nevada, electors are bound to vote for their party rather than serving as the free agents the founders intended. Ballot access laws are often incredibly burdensome and spark legal action. “The election laws are engineered to be sure third parties don’t win,” Lokken said. An indication of how onerous election laws can be for third parties came in 1968 when George Wallace of Alabama created the American Independent Party as a vehicle for his candidacy. In the important state of California not just signatures were needed—66,000 voters had to be convinced to actually register to vote as members of the AIP. One Wallace supporter said, “I tell you, Alabama was just about deserted. The whole state just lit out for California. … I tell you, there wasn’t a lawyer left in town.” In Nevada, the effort to get Wallace’s name on the ballot was led by the late Daniel Hansen, who changed the party’s name here to Independent American. Wallace received 13.2 percent of the vote in


Nevada, and his party has been on the ballot for most of the years since. In 1980, running as an independent, not a third party candidate, John Anderson had to lay out huge amounts of money for lawyers to battle Democratic Party efforts to keep him off the ballot, the assumption being that he would draw votes away from Democratic incumbent Jimmy Carter. “All of the energies and resources of Anderson’s campaign went to getting on the ballot,” Lokken said. “John Anderson mortgaged his house” to pay for ballot access. One of the best indications of the uphill fight for third party and independent candidates came last year when New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg floated some trial balloons about his running for president. “He had the money, but when he took a look at how tough it would be, he stopped talking about that crazy third party bid,” Lokken said. “Party affiliation is so strong with enough people that the Republicans and Democrats, no matter who their candidates were, no matter who voted, would get enough votes that you could get every independent vote, it would still not be a majority,” Bloomberg said. Lokken said just because outside candidates don’t win doesn’t mean they don’t have impact. Sometimes they serve as spoilers. In 1992 and 1996, Ross Perot had the money to get his Reform Party on the ballot, and his conservative candidacy helped draw votes from the Republican candidates

and elect Bill Clinton by less than a majority both times. If a new third party were to become well established in Nevada, the small counties would probably have a role. While the Democrats are the second largest party in voter registration, Republicans have become so dominant in those counties that the Democrats sometimes cannot scrape up candidates—but the Independent American Party does. After the 2010 election, IAP leader Janine Hansen—who lives in Ryndon, east of Elko—said her party had displaced the Democrats as the principal competition to the GOP. “There were no Democrats on the ballot in Elko County local races, except my Assembly race,” she said. “We fielded numerous candidates. That was the same in many rural counties. If the Democrats cannot even field any candidates, and we garnered significantly more votes than them in the only race they participated in, in Elko County, that makes us the de facto second party in Elko County.” The IAP actually won some offices in the small counties—public administrator in Nye County, district attorney in Esmeralda, a county commissioner in White Pine, and clerk treasurer in Eureka. “The result is in the nature of a revolution,” the New York Times reported of Weaver’s Nevada 1892 victory. But revolutions don’t exactly come along every election. Ω

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ine u n e G

Northern Nevada

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PHOTO/sage LeeHey

Just in time for the

HOLIDAYS

Mike Collopy is an organizer of this year’s Great Basin Consortium Conference.

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Conference to discuss effects of fire on the Great Basin Great Basin environmental issues including sage-grouse conservation, wildfires, habitat loss, and climate change will be discussed at the Great Basin Consortium’s third annual conference on Dec. 9 and 10. by Sage Leehey The conference will take place at the Joe Crowley Student Union at the University of Nevada, Reno. The Great Basin Consortium is comprised of s agel@ six separate organizations concerned with education, research and outreach news re view.c om for environmental issues in the Great Basin region. These six organizations are: Great Basin Cooperative Ecosystem Studies Unit (GB-CESU), Great Basin Environmental Program, Great Basin Landscape Conservation Cooperative, Great Basin Restoration Initiative, Great Basin Research and Management Partnership, and Great Basin Fire Science Delivery. “One of our primary objectives with this consortium is to try to get people to articulate what their priorities are in terms of what they would like to get done,” said Mike Collopy, assistant vice president for research at UNR and director of GB-CESU. “And then identify people in the audience or people that we know that maybe can’t make the meeting to see if we can get them to commit to help.” The conference is open to the public and will include business meetings for each organization, a keynote speech by Nevada state director of the Bureau of Land Management Amy Lueders, five sessions with presentations and discussion among other sessions and speakers. Collopy said that in the past, the conference has hosted between 150 to 190 attendees from various groups in the community, including ranchers, farmers, students and faculty from the university, government workers and everything in between. The conference is titled “The Great Basin: A Landscape Under Fire,” For more information about the great Basin so much of the discussion will revolve around fire and the effects it has Consortium, visit on the Great Basin landscapes and species. Fire will be the primary focus environment.unr.edu/ of the meeting because of how the Great Basin is affected by fire, but consortium. sage-grouse and other emerging and high priority issues in the area are important as well, according to Collopy. There will also be sessions about climate change, the Joint Fire Science Program in the region, and how fire has changed landscapes. “Not everything that’s going to be discussed in the meeting will be fire, but fire is such a driving influence out there, especially when you have a drought, and you have a lot of invasive plants that tend to be very flammable, and then you have species like sage-grouse that are declining in numbers, and Fish and Wildlife Service is trying to decide whether they deserve protection under the Endangered Species Act,” Collopy said. The Great Basin Consortium was created to keep the public, interested students, faculty and researchers, government agencies, and politicians informed about what these organizations are doing in the Great Basin and what needs to be done. Collopy said that this conference is a great place to learn and talk about what’s important and what’s going on in the Great Basin. “We really want students, faculty, the public—anyone who has any interest in it to attend,” Collopy said. “I think it’s really great to stimulate the conversation across the board.” Ω

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PHOTO BY ALISON YOUNG

The glamorous showgirl was once an icon synonymous with Reno BY BRAD BYNUM

Hello,

Hollywood, Hello, the MGM Grand’s signature stage show, was a production on a scale that seems almost inconceivable today. The show opened with seven stewardesses dancing on each wing of an airplane. There were circus acts, can-can dances, and homages to classics MGM movies like The Wizard of Oz. Women danced in elaborate 40-pound costumes. There were onstage waterfalls and earthquakes, and a space age discotheque complete with moving scenery, descending from the ceiling, complete with dancers in robot outfits and spacesuits. In recent years, as the casinos have scaled back, much of the glitz exemplified by that show has been lost. A college-aged student, born in Reno in the early ’90s, might have grown up here with little or no knowledge of the glamour of Reno’s nottoo-distant past. One of the icons of this glamorous past was the showgirl: a tall, statuesque dancer adorned with a frilly, feathery, dazzling, sparkling costume. The image of this type of performer was closely associated with our community for decades. Now, it seems almost extinct. What happened? Where did it go? And are there signs of the mythological showgirl still alive in Reno?

“THE SHOWGIRL MUST GO ON” continued from page 13

Viola LaLa Mia backstage at Harrah’s Reno before a performance of The Biggest Little Sideshow earlier this fall.

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“THE SHOWGIRL MUST GO ON”

Artifacts from Hello, Hollywood, Hello in Karen Burns’ collection.

continued from page 13

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PHOTO BY ALISON YOUNG

It’s local history that some residents take for granted and others are unaware of: From 1978 to 1989, Hello, Hollywood, Hello was presented multiple times a week at the MGM Grand Hotel-Casino, which became Bally’s Reno during the run of the show, then later, the Reno Hilton, and it’s now the Grand Sierra Resort. “In 1978, the biggest show in the world was on the biggest stage in the world and it was in the biggest little city in the world,” says Karen Burns, who was a chorus dancer in the show for two years. She now owns and operates her own production company, Karen Burns Productions and owns the bulk of the costumes from Hello, Hollywood, Hello and other original casino revue shows. But when she says “the show,” she means Hello, Hollywood, Hello. “There were 142 performers onstage,” she says. “And that was just that show. Every single casino in town had a show. There were over 300 dancers working seven nights a week. Every single casino had a cabaret. Every single casino had a showroom. And dancers were working all over the place. They came from all over the world to Reno. … This area has one of the most exciting entertainment histories in the world.” Well, maybe not every casino. Burns uses the costumes for dance performances at corporate and private events. She has also exhibited many of them at venues like the Nevada Historical Society, Harrah’s Automobile Museum, the Nevada Museum of Art and the Nevada State Museum. She also regularly presents lectures to college classes, veterans groups and other organizations about dance history and the history of casino shows. The classic showgirls, as seen in Hello, Hollywood, Hello and other shows were all professional dancers, according to Burns. “They were all professionally trained. You had to have ballet training. That was number one. You couldn’t even audition for any show if you didn’t have ballet training. You had to have ballet, jazz, sometimes tap. You had to be a legitimate dancer. Many of these people had performed on Broadway, on television, and movies and videos. They were incredibly talented dancers.” Though there’s a strict historical definition of the height and training of a showgirl, Burns prefers a broader definition: “The definition of showgirl, to me, is any girl that performed on any stage in any show.” According to Burns, the first showgirls danced at Folies Bergère cabaret in Paris in the late 1800s. Florenz Ziegfeld, “the man who invented show business,” saw the Folies Bergère, and was inspired to create the Ziegfeld Follies, lavish Broadway productions famous, in large part, for their beautiful chorus dancers. “MGM did two movies about the Ziegfeld Follies,” says Burns. “Then, when Don Arden produced the Hello, Hollywood, Hello show, he named it the Ziegfeld Theater and the Ziegfeld stage, because it was all about glorifying the American form. That’s where the original showgirls come from. … The whole thing was just glorifying the female form in gorgeous costumes. Originally, there was nothing sexual about it. When you go to

“in the old days, producers and choreographers were paid to create the show. the hotel paid for the cost of creating a show. they paid to put the dancers on the stage. now, as a producer, you have to pay for everything. it’s like, ‘how cheap can you do it?’” Karen Burns, Karen Burns Productions a museum and you see famous pieces of art, there are nude women, but it’s not sexual. … It was all about glamour and sophistication.”

SideShow attraction “It was part of Reno,” says Joan Arrizabalaga, a local artist who makes a lot of casino-themed artwork. She worked

behind the scenes at Harrah’s Reno, in charge of that casino’s wardrobe department from 1986 to 2006. “It’s what Reno always had. We always had that great showgirl culture, all the glitter and glitz and all the excitement of it. You should get some of that when you’re gambling. If they want people to come, they’ve got to get some kind of a reward, besides just losing their

money. Not that they don’t win sometimes.” Arrizabalaga says that the revue shows represented a friendly gesture to the gamblers and other patrons. “I think the important thing—and I really worry about the Nugget now that it’s been sold—I think the important thing is to have a personal touch,” she says. “When somebody owns the club, and it’s their name and their thing, then they have a personal touch, and they have pride in it. When it becomes a corporation, they no longer care about it. It becomes a revenue producer, and they’re trying to get revenue out of everything. And all that really nice fluff that’s on the top disappears.” She says that, in the heyday of the casino culture, the showgirl was the living symbol of Reno’s elegance. One casino, Ernie Primm’s Primadonna, even had a showgirl theme. A few of those old showgirl statues from the casino’s facade now bedazzle the dirty bookstore down the street. “Everybody could see a glamorous girl walking down the street and there was all this energy around it,” she says. “That was such a big part of all the showrooms. Even when you had a star come in, you’d have showgirls, wandering around the club or any of those things. It’s just such an unusual thing, showgirls are. … Now that they’re gone, you really miss it. You don’t see it anymore. We took it all for granted.” “Back in the day showgirls were put up on a pedestal as an iconic thing, untouchable, these glamorous girls who would hang out with Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis Jr.,” says Britney Irwin, a dancer, choreographer and producer. She and her company, BLV Productions, created The Biggest Little Sideshow, which was produced at Harrah’s Reno earlier this year. The show was a hit among locals, particularly a younger crowd that doesn’t often attend many casino shows. It was voted “best casino show” by the readers of this newspaper. “It used to be, honestly, there wasn’t a showroom in town that wasn’t filled with showgirls,” she says. “Now, there’s only two or three operating showrooms in town, unfortunately. I feel like age-wise or generation-wise, I’m kind of like the last of the showgirl era that got to experience it, at least got a taste of it.” In some ways, shows like The Biggest Little Sideshow—and there aren’t many; it was a creative and unique production—are descended from the grand tradition of the casino showgirl revue, though on a much smaller scale. “It’s definitely evolved from that tradition,” says Arrizabalaga. “And Britney is keeping it going as best she can. And that’s brilliant, and I’m proud of her. She’s good at it. She’s got a smaller situation now, and the shows obviously have to be smaller, because everybody has cut back. They’re not doing it they way that they were, especially in Reno, because it’s a corporation now— Harrah’s, where she was. We have more and more corporations now. It’s pretty tough to get that personal touch that Harrah had when


In need of RenovatIon “Poor Reno—Reno used to be the entertainment mecca of the world,” says Burns. “Starting with Piper’s Opera house, and Cal-Neva Tahoe and Harrah’s South Shore Room, starting with the first of the first of

PHOTO BY ALISON YOUNG

he was there. That was what made it all so great. The showgirl thing and all the shows were a gift. That’s what they gave. You paid some money to get into them but nothing like what they want now. That was a gift to the gamblers. Now it doesn’t feel like they give the gamblers anything. We could mail our money in if that’s what they want.” “What it all boils down to is money,” says Burns. “In the old days, producers and choreographers were paid to create the show. The hotel paid for the cost of creating a show. They paid to put the dancers on the stage. Now, as a producer, you have to pay for everything. It’s like, ‘How cheap can you do it?’ That’s the question in the world now. It’s not how creative, or lavish and beautiful, or wonderful. It’s how cheap can you do this? You can’t create opulence and lavishness.” Burns says that some of the costumes from Hello, Hollywood, Hello cost $1,500 apiece to create—in 1978 dollars. (She says she’s still paying off the loan she used to buy the costumes from Bally’s in the ’90s.)

Producer and former dancer Karen Burns shows photographs from MGM’s stage show Hello, Hollywood, Hello.

the first. That’s where everybody wanted to perform. I even remember—and I’m not that old—Reno was cooler than Vegas at the time I was dancing. Nobody wanted to go Vegas. Reno was cooler than Vegas in the ’70s and the early ’80s.” Burns says that it’s one of her dreams to develop a traveling exhibit of the more than 1,200 costumes in her collection, and have a permanent, rotating exhibit here in the city. “There’s like no interest in Reno,” she says. “People look and go, ‘Oh, Karen and those old showgirls. We don’t want to do

showgirls. That’s topless and that’s not appropriate.’ No, we’re talking about the history of dance and the history of culture and the history of fashion.” That said, Burns says she has seen some renewed interest in recent years, as the distance in time has become less passé and more romantic. “Everything old is new again,” she says. “The older generation misses that glamour. They’re like, what happened? Where the glamour? Where’s the sophistication? Where’s the beauty? The young people that I work

with, they’re usually between 18 and 25 years old, they just go crazy with the costumes and the music, because they didn’t even know this world existed. It’s new to them. They always ask, why don’t we do shows like this?” Arrizabalaga points out that, with Burns’ costume collection, Will Durham’s neon sign collection, recently exhibited at the Nevada Museum of Art, archival information in the Nevada Historical Society, the artwork, historical drawings and old slot machines recently exhibited at the University of Nevada, Reno’s Art of Gaming exhibition, there’s more than enough material to create a Reno museum. “But people don’t seem to want it around here,” she says. “We don’t have a museum in this town for that stuff like that. We don’t have our Reno museum that we need to have, that shows anybody who wants to walk in and get a sense of this, who could see some costumes or see some neon or see some old stuff. We don’t have a museum like that in Reno and no one seems to want one. We have empty buildings downtown. We have the old Penney’s building. We have all kinds of buildings down there that could be a museum. I think that would bring people to Reno. People want to see what it was. It may never be that again, probably won’t. But it would be nice to be able to show people what it was.” Ω For more information, visit www.karenburnsproductions.com and www.blvproductions.com.

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Painter Erik Holland at work.

by

ASHLEY HENNEFER

LITTLE

PICTURE SHOW

The ICONS OF NV exhibit captures Nevada on tiny canvases 16   |  RN&R   | 

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EVADA, DESPITE RECENT REBRANDING EFFORTS, HAS A PARTICULAR REPUTATION THROUGHOUT THE WORLD.

It’s a state known for being a little rough around the edges, a little free-spirited, a little garish—both rural and urban, scattered with cities where marriage, divorce, sex and tattoos are all readily available within a one-mile radius. It’s home to the neon lights and casino glow of Las Vegas and Reno, but also beautiful deserts and a selection of lakes and ancient cave drawings. It’s a state in a perpetual identity crisis—which, in a way, has become its identity. This is the imagery represented in the Icons of NV exhibit, opening Dec. 5 at the Sierra Arts Gallery. The exhibit, intended to be held every two years, returns after a five year hiatus. Founded in 1982, the inaugural Biggest Little Art Show in Nevada was curated by artist and University of Nevada, Reno professor Jim McCormick. McCormick, at the time a new convert to miniature art—art created within a small form—proposed a challenge to Nevada artists.

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The challenge: create a piece of art, no larger than 4 square inches. The show was a success, and four similar shows were held. While each show received an abundance of submissions—typically more than 100—the last Biggest Little Art Show in Nevada was held in 2008. After years of changing leadership, it’s now under the organization of the Sierra Arts Foundation. “McCormick envisioned it as a stand-alone show,” says Sierra Arts Gallery representative Chad Sweet. “The idea was met with incredulity, but because artists were so intrigued, they ended up submitting more than 100 submissions. The show used to be juried, bringing in outside curators from places like San Francisco or Chicago.” This year, the Sierra Arts staff will select their favorites. “We’re so excited to have brought it back,” says Sweet. The gallery put out a call for artists, and 35 artists were selected. “It’s great to have that collaboration of artists and their different interpretations.”

N N OT P re s e nt s. . .

“I live here because I can see the sky,” says painter and cartoonist Erik Holland. “I came here from the Bay Area and have lived in big cities for most of my life. But I live for the big desert sky—and the smell of the sagebrush, the way the mountain turns red at dusk. Life is filled with possibility. It’s just beautiful.” Holland is one of 35 artists participating in the exhibit. His tiny painting is of the Nevada sky. After the “month of brown” during the Yosemite Rim fire, Holland says painting the open sky was “the first thing that came to mind.” For Holland, a muralist and en plein air painter—a term referring to artists who paint outdoors—keeping his art within the exhibit requirements was a unique challenge. “I really enjoyed working in that size,” he says. “I was trained in art school to think big: ‘If it’s not big it’s not good.’ I’ve never taken small work that seriously. To tell you the truth I didn’t find it particularly limiting, trying to make a postage-stamp sized image of a big size.” Holland moved to Nevada in 1999 after spending several years in the Bay Area and Alaska. After a brief stint working at the Battle Mountain Bugle, it became his dream to live in Nevada. “I’ve done iconic Nevada buildings since arriving,” says Holland. “I’ve already done a book of cartoons with a Nevada Arts Council grant.” He’s currently applying for a Jackpot grant to publish a book. Illustrator Lisa Kurt, an artist featured in the show, moved to Nevada from Boston. “Nevada has so much cool history and so many rich stories that make it such a unique and interesting place,” she says. “Nevada is an inspiring place. The landscape is often very inspiring for me as an artist.” Kurt created a mixed-media portrait of Sarah Winnemucca—a “controversial” figure, but “an incredibly interesting person.” The size requirement challenge Kurt to maintain the level of detail her art usually includes—expressive faces, subtle color shifts within her characters’ hair and eyes. Although she posted a larger version of the painting on her website, the original “really is hard to believe until you see it,” she says. While Holland and Kurt interpreted the familiar, some artists took a more abstract approach. Artist Austin Pratt’s piece, entitled “Basin + Range: Original violence/dissident underworld,” features a coffin surrounded by abstract imagery and color. Other pieces encompass landmarks, like the Fleishmann Planetarium, currently celebrating its 50th anniversary. “I just think that the show itself is so unique,” says Sweet. “It’s a unique format and it really challenges artists. The public gets excited about it, too, just to see what people come up with.” As artists whose hometowns are in other states, the exhibit was a chance for Kurt and Holland to explore their identity as Nevada artists. “I like this show as a concept,” Holland says. “It was a perfect fit for me, and a challenge to try something new as an artist. And there’s so much I love about Nevada. This is my home.” Ω

Saturday December 7th

!! g n i t s e t V I H e Fre

Dirty Load

The Annual

“ IT’S INTERESTING TO SEE WHAT PEOPLE NOT FROM NEVADA THINK ARE THE ICONS OF NEVADA.” Chad Sweet, Sierra Arts Gallery representative Originally, the size requirements were 2 inches by 2 inches, but this was changed to 2.25 inches by 3.25 inches—the size of a playing card. The gallery handles matting and framing, and the art is available for sale at the exhibit to serve as a fundraiser for the Sierra Arts Foundation. Sweet, an artist with a background in theater and visual arts, says that artists were not given any additional instructions other than the size and the theme—Icons of NV. From there, everything was left to their interpretation. “Icons can mean two things,” Sweet says of his personal interpretation of the theme. “It can be a personal icon that you identify with, or a public icon identifiable to others. It’s interesting to see what people not from Nevada think are the icons of Nevada. The longer you’re here, you start to uncover the things that even the locals miss.” Sweet has lived in Nevada for several years, after much time spent traveling for his career. While the focus of the show is on artists in Nevada—“within a 100 mile radius,” says Sweet—that’s a fairly open-ended requirement. Some of the artists are lifelong Nevadans. Others are former Nevadans who have since moved away or transplants from other states. In the past, the theme of the exhibit has varied, often representing quite literal aspects of Nevada history, such as mining and gambling. “It’s interesting that when you give artists a limit, they want to break away from that,” says Sweet. “But when you give them so little, they want more rules. What’s an icon? A person? A place?”

MORE THAN

A FEELING For several of the artists, Nevada icons are interpreted as internal representations of the state’s features and reflections on their own values. OPINION

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Free cover before 10pm ($5 cover after 10pm) Free Beer Bust 9pm - 11pm $3 Jello Shots (proceeds for benefit) First 50 poeple receive a ticket for a chance to win $50 cash! S p o n s o re d by :

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My family will have affordable health insurance soon. It’s a huge relief.

The federal healthcare law requires all of us to have health insurance by 2014. Enroll in a health plan today and, depending on your income, you could receive help with your insurance costs. At Nevada Health Link, you can purchase certified health insurance plans that are high quality, regardless of the amount you pay. You can’t be denied, even if you have a previous health condition. Find a plan that’s right for you at NevadaHealthLink.com or by calling 855-7-NVLINK (855-768-5465). For updates, text NVLINK to 25827. Enroll before December 15 and be covered in January.

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December 5, 2013


Photo/Allison Young

For holiday lubbers

Butts get cracked during a performance of Brüka Theatre’s Buttcracker 5.

Buttcracker 5: Pirate Booty I really have no idea how to write a review about a play that’s meant to be a joke, which actuby ally is not supposed to be good. Jessica Santina But that’s precisely what sells tickets to Buttcracker—sells them very quickly, in fact. Even before opening night, most performances of this fifth installment of Brüka’s original parody of The Nutcracker were already sold out. Fortunately, I had arrived early enough on opening night that I was at the top of the waiting list, and I squeaked in. This earned Buttcracker 5: Pirate Booty is at Brüka me a prime seat for actor heckling. theatre, 99 n. Virginia Begun in 2009, Buttcracker is an st., through Dec. 21. annual creation of the Brüka Ensemble. The For more information, theme changes each year, but the essential visit www.bruka.org or premise remains the same: The professional call 323-3221. ballet company scheduled to perform The Nutcracker has somehow been prevented from coming (here, pirates are ye culprits),

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and now the Brüka actors, who are in no way qualified, must step in. Having never before seen this show, which has become a local holiday tradition, I found it to be a bit like going to see The Rocky Horror Picture Show. The audience, a crazy community of über-fans, is encouraged to participate, wear costumes, and talk smack. The man next to me extended his hand and said, “Since we’re going to be laughing together for a while, let me introduce myself.” Then came a brief introduction by director Mary Bennett, who cracked a few pirate jokes and then the show started. A flurry of actors arrived on stage, doing the pre-party bustling that sets up the first act of The Nutcracker. Then, a hairy actor in a servant’s costume asked me to fasten his bra, which pretty much tells you what you need to know about the show. The plot, narrated by a bored, acerbic stage manager (Gary Cremeans), begins to follow the original, but soon veers off into weird territory. Young Clara (played by Bennett) and her family host a Christmas

Eve celebration, where “Uncle Creepy” (played on opening night by understudy Eddie Vigil) arrives, wearing a dead bird on his shoulder and bearing gifts for the kiddies—including a nutcracker doll for Clara. Her weird brother, Fritz (John Wade), tries to steal it, everyone dances badly, Clara falls asleep, a bunch of rats show up and fight the doll, the doll turns into a Jack Sparrow look-alike (Robert Grant), and he and Clara dance off to a magical land populated with a fantastic transvestite Sugar Plum Fairy (also John

Wade), a mermaid (Paris Rich), and a bunch of fish. Then, pirates hijack the show and start twerking. You know, all the heartwarming stuff of classic Christmas tales. It’s a show that knows what it is and does it well, and there’s no pretense of anything more than lowbrow comedy. The idea of “great acting” is shelved, and any barrier between actors and audience is stripped away. Yet it’s obvious that a tremendous amount of work went into it, in both the writing and performances—even bad dancing takes work—and maintaining that level of energy through a myriad of complicated costume changes is admirable. A handful of moments induced eye rolls, and I preferred the Act I parodies of The Nutcracker to the Act II twerky-pirate stuff. But I left the theater with my face tired from laughing, some pirate swag, and a feeling of connection to the performers that I’ve rarely, if ever, felt before. Ω

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DECEMBER 5, 2013

Chef Woodall was born in South Korea and trained in Classical French with previous experience at La Creperie Cafe in Long Beach, Calif., Wild River Grill, and The Grill at Quail Corners here in town. To start, I tried the tomato brie soup ($5 cup), and chicken pot stickers with lemongrass and ginger ponzu ($10). The soup had a noticeable fresh vegetable backbone flavor with a creamy finish and a slice of brie floating. The potstickers, creations of Chef Mike Woodall, were all about ground meat engulfed in a cascade of rich citrus layers of flavor that made my mouth alive with tantalizing bursts in every bite. A light soy dipping sauce added saltiness to expose the layers of zesty flavors to the taste buds. The nine thin-crusted pizzas, or light meals, are also ways to start. The happy hour menu ($5-$12) is all about small plates with bites like toasted rosemary cashews ($5) or Bison Sliders with NY white cheddar ($7), with a good glass of wine or any one of the 20-plus draft, foreign or domestic beers they offer. The miso crusted Chilean sea bass ($33) with

sweet soy glaze was a must. Coated with miso, a traditional Japanese seasoning, pan seared and glazed with Chef’s homemade sweet soy, this dish was nothing short of nirvana. I could really taste the interplay between the flavor of the fish, a flakey, light, savory palate pleaser, and the flavor of the marinade, a salty-sweet infusion, making every bite memorable and alluring. Forbidden rice as the starch with some squash balanced the plate. Legend tells us that this deep purple rice is ancient grain, fabled to enrich health and ensure longevity, once eaten exclusively by the emperors of China. I couldn’t resist the by-the-glass wine list and jumped in head-first. With my appetizers, I quaffed the 2012 Truchard, “The Shepherd” Napa ($11). Aromas of passion fruit, honeysuckle and lime were highlighted with notes of lychee and jasmine. The mouthfeel has subtle richness, filled with intense flavors of grapefruit, white peach and melon; bright acidity provides a zesty finish of spicy citrus. So with fish, one drinks white? Not this pilgrim, and I saw two reds screaming, “Take me!” The 2009 Revo Lution Malbec from Argentina ($9)—this wine marched through my mouth with remarkable flavors and delicate minerality. Aged in seasoned barrels, there’s a black peppery kick that left my palate humming for a few seconds after the first sip. Drink deep the black cherry flavors and long live the revolution! Another sleeper caused me to succumb—the 2009 Owen Roe “Abbot’s Table” from the Columbia River Valley in Washington State. With mouthwatering aromas of plum, raspberry, white pepper and herbaceous undertones, the mouth-feel has lovely depth and richness with bright acidity, rounded out with hints of vanilla, dark cocoa nibs, robust violet and spice—crazy good with this fish. The chef would not allow me to escape without a signature dessert, Hava Java Mudpie with chocolate cookie crust, coffee ice cream, hot fudge sauce, locally made chocolatecoffee Java Chip ($8). Whatever you imagine about this, you are correct! Ω


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Tour de fraud

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The Armstrong Lie I’ll say this about Lance Armstrong: I couldn’t give two damns about him when he was racing his little bicycle in the Tour de France all those years. Whenever I caught clips of his arrogant ass talking about the sport and defiantly bragging about the legitimacy of his victories, I thought he was a jackass. I didn’t like the image the guy was putting out there, even before his by doping scandal truly caught fire after his 2009 Bob Grimm comeback. Now that he’s been caught in all sorts of bgrimm@ newsreview.c om vicious lies, well, I find him oddly compelling. I still think he’s a douchebag, but it’s just so damned interesting to watch him confess in that Oprah interview and, finally, in this “so revealing it’s kind of creepy and you can’t take your eyes off of it” documentary, The Armstrong Lie.

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I feel sorry for his girlfriend.

1 Poor

2 Fair

3 Good

4 Very Good

5 excellent

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In 2009, filmmaker Alex Gibney set out to chronicle Armstrong’s intended triumphant return to cycling, and his attempt to win his eighth Tour de France title. Allegations of Armstrong using performance-enhancing drugs were starting to really haunt one of the world’s most famous athletes. He wanted to come back and prove that he could win the race with a clean bloodstream. Gibney’s documentary has taken on an entirely new look in the wake of the Oprah interview. It is now a chronicle of Armstrong’s many vindictive, damaging lies throughout his career. It is perhaps the most aptly titled movie of the year. Armstrong basically admits in one of the post-apology interviews done for this movie that, had he just stayed retired and walked away from the sport, he probably never would’ve wound up sitting across from Oprah spilling his guts. Because the movie was supposed to be a

DECEMBER 5, 2013

chronicle of the 2009 race and the return of the bicycling king, much footage of that race makes it into the movie. That race is used as a framing device for the film. Interspersed are many interviews with the likes of Armstrong, former teammates like the disgraced Floyd Landis, and officials who had, justifiably, targeted Armstrong throughout his career. Look, lying about taking steroids, EPO and HGH has been a standard for many athletes, certainly during the last 20 years. But Armstrong repeatedly threw his friends and teammates under the bus in a disgusting way that The Armstrong Lie shows again and again through archival footage. It’s beyond amazing how brutal this man was, and is—a true example of a person being willing to win at all costs. As for Armstrong’s accomplishments, I see him as something akin to the Six Million Dollar Man, with the bionic parts being replaced by all sorts of funky drugs. Look, a human being isn’t supposed to be able to do what he did in his Tour de France victories—it’s actually inhuman. So whenever I see Lance starting to accelerate on his bike, I know it’s as fake as that Six Million Dollar Man opening where Lee Majors starts out running at an impressive pace, and then they just speed the film up. Armstrong needed tricks of a different order to make him look fast, but they were tricks all the same. The film spends a good portion of its time on Armstrong’s cancer battle, which took place before any of his Tour victories. I had forgotten that the cancer had spread from his testicles all the way up to his brain, resulting in actual brain surgery. His being able to come back from almost certain death and ride again was a spectacular achievement. His decision to further risk his health and taint his sport by injecting all manners of drugs into his body is where he went terribly wrong. So, what was originally intended as testimony to determination and conquering insurmountable adversities has become a profile of some dude with serious integrity issues. The Armstrong Lie is the sorriest of closing chapters to an athletic career you are likely to see. Oh wait … A-Rod. Ω

Bad Grandpa

Johnny Knoxville has tried to parlay his Jackass fame into an acting career, and he hasn’t exactly been setting the world on fire. So, because huge paychecks are tempting, he has returned to the Jackass well numerous times with three official movies, and his body has paid a tremendous toll. The man has thrown himself into the path of buffalos and bulls to score good laughs and, oh man, has he gotten those good laughs. As big as those checks can be, internal bleeding and broken limbs lose their luster after a while. So now we get this, a sort of Jackass movie that has a narrative mixed into hidden camera stunts. It’s very much in the tradition of Borat. Knoxville gets to play one part for the film, that of Irving Zisman, an over-80 letch of an old man that has shown up in past Jackass skits. He’s taking his grandson (Jackson Nicoll) across country, leading to some funny stunts that manage to shock a few. The highlight would be Nicoll dressed in drag and dancing to “Cherry Pie” at a beauty pageant, a moment when he basically steals the movie from Knoxville. Not as outrageous as the other Jackass films, but a nice way to keep the franchise going without destroying Knoxville’s body.

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Dallas Buyers Club

Matthew McConaughey continues his career resurgence in this film based on the life of Ron Woodroof, a man who tested HIV positive in the ’80s, and had to battle the FDA while smuggling non-approved drugs into the country for himself and fellow sufferers. McConaughey lost many pounds to look the part, and it’s a frightening transformation. He also delivers an incredible performance. This, combined with his work earlier this year in Mud, easily establishes 2013 as the best year of his career. Jared Leto does incredible work as Rayon, a crossdresser who helps Woodroof distribute the drugs to those needing some sort of treatment. Director Jean-Marc Vallee does a good job of capturing a time where HIV was a death sentence, and the terror that surrounded those who were fighting for their lives. This is a very good movie with great performances.

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Delivery Man

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Frozen

Vince Vaughn battles to make this American remake of Starbuck (both directed by Ken Scott) something worthwhile, and he almost wins. He plays David, a meat deliveryman who finds out he’s fathered over 500 children due to sperm clinic donations, and some of those kids want to meet him. David finds out who some of the kids are, spies on them, and tries to serve them as some sort of guardian angel. The film, while containing some genuinely warm moments, lost me in the final stretch where it gets overwhelmed by its dopey plot. Vaughn gives a good performance, as do some of the supporting cast (good to see SNL’s Bobby Moynihan getting some lines), but the pieces don’t add up. The outrageous premise screams for something a little less conventional than what Scott serves up. It’s one of those movies where you can predict all of the choices the protagonist is going to make, which results in boredom.

I have to admit I was more into the strange Mickey Mouse short that precedes this musical adaptation of Hans Christian Anderson’s “The Snow Queen” than the actual feature. It features retro Mickey busting out of a black and white film and becoming 3-D as he battles a bad guy kidnapping Minnie. It’s worth the price of admission. As for the actual feature movie, Kristen Bell and Idina Menzel have wonderful voices, and the visuals are fun to behold in this middle-of-the-road Disney fare. It has a lot of music—some of it quite good, some of it, well, not—and a beautiful look to it. For recent Disney animation, my vote goes to Tangled for best, but that’s not to say this one is a letdown. It’s OK Just OK. It’s about on par with Pixar’s latest, Monster’s University. It’s fun to watch, but not altogether memorable.

2

Homefront

4

The Hunger Games: Catching Fire

2

Oldboy

3

Thor: The Dark World

Jason Statham and James Franco star in this piece of silliness from the pen of Sylvester Stallone. While I’m not giving it a good review, I can tell you that fans of Statham and Franco probably won’t be too disappointed with this in that both do pretty good jobs of presenting rather stupid material. Statham stars as Broker, a former DEA agent looking for a new life with his young daughter in a place that he so very obviously should’ve stayed away from. Franco stars as Gator, a small-time meth dealer looking to go bigger. When Broker’s daughter punches Gator’s nephew out on the school playground, Gator decides to get involved, and things go haywire. Statham is better than usual here, and Franco is actually kind of great as the bad guy. But Stallone’s screenplay is so routine you can guess the plot points 10 minutes before they happen. Still, it does have Kate Bosworth and Winona Ryder as meth heads, so you could do worse at the movie theaters.

After a sloppy start, The Hunger Games franchise kicks into high gear with this solid, darker chapter. Jennifer Lawrence, looking a little more haggard and embittered, makes for a far more convincing war-torn survivor this time out. Her performance is great, as are the contributions of a bunch of new cast members including Jena Malone, Philip Seymour Hoffman and Sam Claflin. The new look and feel of the series can mostly be attributed to new director Francis Lawrence and his cinematographer Jo Willems, who get rid of that dopey, baroque look of the first movie in favor of something darker. The plot involves Katniss and fellow survivor Peeta (Josh Hutcherson) being forced into another Hunger Games where former victors must compete against each other. This installment has a lot more meat on the bone, and the action is easier to follow thanks to a much less frantic editing style. Francis Lawrence will direct the final two Hunger Games movies, and that’s good news for fans.

It was a dumb, stupid, asinine, ridiculous, idiotic, energy-wasting, sucky, loser, moronic idea to remake Chan-wook Park’s certifiably insane 2003 revenge classic. While I’m fairly open-minded about the idea of remakes, some films should never be touched again. Heck, it’s amazing that the original Oldboy, a tale of captivity, octopus-eating and incest, actually ever made it to the big screen. Spike Lee somehow landed the job of Americanizing Park’s film (after Steven Spielberg flirted with the idea), and he actually does a decent job in the first half. Josh Brolin plays a drunken louse who gets kidnapped and imprisoned in a strange hotel room for 20 years while somebody frames him for the murder of his wife. He is then released, whereupon he starts seeking revenge. The captivity scenes are the best things in the movie, with Brolin doing a good job losing his mind on screen. The movie falls apart when he gets out, although Lee’s attempt to recreate the infamous hallway hammer scene is admirable. Rumor has it Lee’s original cut was an hour longer. I’d like to see that cut, because what made it to the screen feels both unnecessary and incomplete.

This latest installment is a step back from Kenneth Branagh’s goofy and grand first franchise installment, Thor. While not likely to piss off superhero film fans, this sequel from director Alan Taylor is not going to blow many minds away, either. It’s a semiefficient placeholder flick moving us towards the next Avengers movie, due in 2015. Chris Hemsworth returns as that incredibly handsome man with long hair, a big hammer and impossibly silly dialogue. The film takes place after The Avengers, with a dark ancient force threatening the universe, and only Thor and his imprisoned brother Loki (Tom Hiddleston, stealing the movie) can save us. The movie is OK, but somewhat of a comedown considering how fun the first Thor and The Avengers were. It’s merely a placeholder until Thor’s next appearance in an Avengers movie, with some decent action and special effects to tide us over until the next Marvel fix.


Family band The Third Wheelers The Third Wheelers is a group bound together by a shared love of music as well as an addiction to nicotine. The front by Clint Demeritt porch was the perfect setting for the band’s folk-acoustic style as a post-interview smoke break turned into an impromptu band practice. The 10 members took turns singing while trading an acoustic guitar and a ukulele between songs. The Third Wheelers has quite the robust roster: Jay Collins and Devin Jones play guitar, Forest Molina on drums, Victor Monson plays ukulele and guitar, Robert Molina on bass, Ellie Collins rocks the xylophone, Trevor LeMay plays the violin and guitar along with singers Heidi Arndt, Jenny Stamps and Rose Molina.

PHOTO/CLINT DEMERITT

Forest said he enjoys the sheer volume of creative energy the group produces. The members all contribute songs to the band. Even though the band has only been together for about half a year, it has created more than 20 original songs. Once, Jay and Jones pumped out five songs in one day. Though there is a lot of creativity and a broad swath of voices going into their music, Forest said the band stays on the same wavelength. “That’s the nice thing about our sound that I’ve noticed,” Forest said. “Because we have so many people, it’s really broad, but it’s still very focused.” One subject the band tends to focus on is the concept of family. And that’s not just because there are two sets of siblings in the band. (Robert, Rose and Forest are also siblings.) Jones said he loves the energy that comes with playing in a band with so many people, especially siblings. Ellie and Rose enjoy being in the band with their brothers. They said the intimacy that comes with songwriting has brought the siblings closer together. “Our music comes from deep inside,” Ellie said. “So we do learn about each other, the way that we write, and it has just brought us so much closer together as friends and as families.” The song “Family and Friends” is about how the two things are one and the same, Jay said. The Third Wheelers said the band members have come to rely on each other just like a family. This sense of closeness resonates through songs such as “Fall too Fast,” “Seeing Stones” and other band favorites. “‘Miracle of Flight’ is one of my favorite songs” Monson said. “I felt like all of us were going through hard stuff in our lives at the same time, and that song is sad but uplifting with the lyrics and it makes you hopeful.” “I love ‘The March’” Arndt added. “All of our songs are so freaking mellow and that one is just ‘Huzza!’” Ω

The group had been friends long before they started creating music together. But the band germinated with siblings Jay and Ellie and Jones when they wrote their first song “Thursday Afternoon” back in May. The band’s name came from a joke made by another Collins sister. Ellie and Jay are siblings, Ellie and Jones are in a relationship, and Jay and Jones are best friends, making each original member a third wheel in one sense or another. The joke stuck as the band’s name. Forest joined soon after, and the band has been adding third wheels ever since. Jay admits thst having a band with so many people can be a hassle, especially in getting members together for practice. But he says the rewards outweigh the headaches. “It’s definitely really difficult being in a band this size, but listening to the music we made, the payoff is unbelievable,” he said.

Big band: The Third Wheelers are, back row, Robert Molina, Rose Molina, Heidi Arndt, Devin Jones, Jay Collins, and front row, Ellie Collins, Jenny Stamps, Forest Molina, and Victor Monson.

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THURSDAY 12/5

FRIDAY 12/6

SATURDAY 12/7

1UP

125 W. Third St., (775) 323-5005

Blues jam w/Blue Haven, 9:30pm, no cover

THE ALLEY

DG Kicks, 9pm ,Tu, no cover 7 Seconds, Me Time, Kill the Precedent, Donkey Jaw, 8:30pm, $15

906 Victorian Ave., Sparks; (775) 358-8891

The Phenomenauts, Dusty Miles and the Cryin’ Shame, White Bulbs, 8:30pm, $7-$10

BAR-M-BAR

Alt-J

816 Highway 40 West, Verdi; (775) 351-3206

Dec. 5, 7 p.m. Grand Sierra Resort 2500 E. Second St. 789-2000

CEOL IRISH PUB 538 S. Virginia St., (775) 329-5558

CHAPEL TAVERN 1099 S. Virginia St., (775) 324-2244

Pub Quiz Trivia Night, 8pm, no cover

The Clarke Brothers, 9pm, no cover

Sonic Mass w/DJ Tigerbunny, 7pm, no cover

Good Friday with rotating DJs, 10pm, no cover

Neil O’Kane, 9pm, no cover

COMMA COFFEE

Post show s online by registering at www.newsr eview.com /reno. Dea dline is the Friday befo re publication .

312 S. Carson St., Carson City; (775) 883-2662

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Comedy Catch a Rising Star, Silver Legacy, 407 N. Virginia St., 329-4777: Kat Simmons, Th, 7:30pm, $15.95; Bobby Collins, F, 7:30pm, 9:30pm, $15.95; Sa, 7:30pm, 9:30pm, $17.95; ANT featuring Jackie Jones, Tu, W, 7:30pm, $15.95 The Improv at Harveys Cabaret, Harveys Lake Tahoe, Stateline, (800) 553-1022: John Henton, Alysia Wood, Th-F, Su, 9pm, $25; Sa, 8pm, 10pm, $30; Shayla Rivera, Nick Cobb, W, 9pm, $25 Reno-Tahoe Comedy at Pioneer Underground, 100 S. Virginia St., 686-6600: Make Me Laugh, Make Me Yours with Karith Foster, F, 8:30pm; Sa, 6pm, 9:30pm, $13, $16

EL CORTEZ LOUNGE 235 W. Second St., (775) 324-4255

Karaoke with Lisa Lisa, 9pm, no cover

FUEGO

Karaoke with Lisa Lisa, 9pm, no cover

THE GRID BAR & GRILL 8545 N. Lake Blvd., Kings Beach; (530) 546-0300

HANGAR BAR

Karaoke Kat, 9pm, no cover

10603 Stead Blvd., Stead; (775) 677-7088

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Karaoke w/Andrew, 9pm, no cover

Bass Heavy, 9pm, W, $TBA

Canyon Jam, 8pm, no cover

Outspoken: Open Mic Night, 7pm, M, no cover

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Karaoke with Lisa Lisa, 9pm, M, Tu, W, no cover

Mike Donovan, 7:30pm, $5

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Karaoke with Lisa Lisa, 9pm, no cover

Groovebox, TyLov, 3pm, no cover

3819 Saddle Rd., South Lake Tahoe, (530) 314-7665 140 Vesta St., (775) 742-1858

CW and Mr. Spoons, noon, M, no cover Mile High Jazz Band, 8pm, Tu, $5

Open mic, 7pm, no cover

1100 E. Plumb Ln., (775) 828-7665

THE HOLLAND PROJECT

Traditional Irish Tune Session, 7pm, Tu, no cover

Live flamenco guitar music, 5:30pm, no cover

170 S. Virginia St., (775) 322-1800

246 W. First St., (775) 329-4484

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Karaoke with Lisa Lisa, 9pm, no cover

Monday Night Open Mic, 8pm, M, no cover

Open Mic Jam, 9:30pm, M, karaoke, 9:30pm, Tu, open mic, 9:30pm, W, no cover

Thee Orbiters, 9:30pm, no cover

275 E. Fourth St., (775) 324-1917

3rd Street, 125 W. Third St., 323-5005: Comedy Night & Improv w/Patrick Shillito, W, 9pm, no cover

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY 12/9-12/11 College Night Wednesdays, 8pm, W, no cover

Select Saturdays, 8pm, no cover

214 W. Commercial Row, (775) 329-9444

3RD STREET

SUNDAY 12/8


THURSDAY 12/5

FRIDAY 12/6

SATURDAY 12/7

Erika Paul, 6pm, no cover

First Take featuring Rick (SAX) Metz, 6pm, no cover

Bill Davis, 6pm, no cover

71 S. Wells Ave., (775) 384-1652

Marianarchy Winter Ball 2013, 4pm, $10

Marianarchy Winter Ball 2013, 2pm, $10

KNITTING FACTORY CONCERT HOUSE

Emilie Autumn, 8:30pm, $13-$30

JAZZ, A LOUISIANA KITCHEN 1180 Scheels Dr., Sparks; (775) 657-8659

JUB JUB’S THIRST PARLOR

211 N. Virginia St., (775) 323-5648

SUNDAY 12/8

Get Shot, Death Valley High, Flesh Hammers, 9pm, M, $5 Sick Puppies, The Letter Black, Seasons of Insanity, 8pm, W, $18-$37

KNUCKLEHEADS BAR & GRILL Karaoke hosted by Gina Jones, 7pm, no cover

3001 W. Fourth St., (775) 322-3001

Emilie Autumn

Open Mic/College Night, 8pm, Tu, no cover

405 Vine St., (775) 323-6500

THE POINT

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY 12/9-12/11

POLO LOUNGE 1559 S. Virginia St., (775) 322-8864

Karaoke hosted by Gina Jones, 9pm, no cover

Karaoke hosted by Gina Jones, 9pm, no cover

Gemini w/Johnny Lipka & Andrea, 9pm, no cover

Gemini w/Johnny Lipka & Andrea, 9pm, no cover

Dec. 6, 8:30 p.m. Knitting Factory 211 N. Virginia St. 323-5648

Darcy & January, Corky Bennett, 7pm, W, no cover

RED DOG SALOON

Open Mic Night, 7pm, W, no cover

76 N. C St., Virginia City; (775) 847-7474

RUBEN’S CANTINA

Karaoke, 8pm, no cover

1483 E. Fourth St., (775) 622-9424

Hip Hop Open Mic, 10pm, W, no cover

RYAN���S SALOON

Karaoke, 9pm, no cover

924 S. Wells Ave., (775) 323-4142

SIDELINES BAR & NIGHTCLUB

Live jazz, 7:30pm, W, no cover Dropkikk, 9pm, no cover

Open Mic Night w/Tany Jane, 8pm, M, Black and Blues Jam, 8:30pm, Tu, no cover

Dance party, 9pm, no cover

Strange on the Range, 7pm, M, no cover Tuesday Night Trivia, 8pm, Tu, no cover

432 E. Fourth St., (775) 410-5993

Ritual (’80s post-punk, industrial, goth), 9pm, $3 before 10pm; $5 after

Karaoke Night, 7pm, Tu, no cover Open Mic Wednesdays, 7pm, W, no cover

TAP SHACK

Mark Castro Band, 8pm, no cover

Davis Nothere, 9pm, no cover

1237 Baring Blvd., Sparks; (775) 355-1030

ST. JAMES INFIRMARY 445 California Ave., (775) 657-8484

STUDIO ON 4TH

112 Rice St., Carson City; (775) 884-4666

VASSAR LOUNGE

The Phenomenauts Dec. 7, 8:30 p.m. The Alley 906 Victorian Ave. Sparks 358-8891

Rock’N J Entertainment Karaoke, 8pm, no cover

1545 Vassar St., (775) 348-7197

WILDFLOWER VILLAGE

Reno Music Project Open Mic, 6:30pm, no cover

4275-4395 W. Fourth St., (775) 787-3769

Wildflower Comedy Power Hour Open Mic, 8:30pm, no cover

7S SECONDS EC NDS ECO ECONDS EC ND

Friday, F Frid iday y, December Dece ecembe mbe b r6

W/ M Me e Time, T me, Kill The Precedent, Precede cedent, Donkey J Jaw

PHENOMONAUTS P PHE NOMONAUTS

Saturday, S Sat ur ay, urd y December 7

W/ D Dusty u y Mil usty ust Mile Miles es And The Cryin' Shame, W White Bulbs, Bulb bs, s, Some Some Kind K Of Nightmare (San Diego) Die ego)

OU DEVICES OUR

Thursday, December 12

W/ The Jet Stole Home, Thursday Knights Out, Drag Me Under

FRI & sat 12/6-12/7

WINDS OF PLAGUE

Friday, December 13

Marianarchy Winter Ball A Benefit for Niko Theologitis and Marianarchy Productions

W/ Impending Doom, No Bragging Rights, City In The Sea, Destruction Of A King

WEAPONS STATUS RED

Saturday, December 14

W/ Up Against It, Shadow Beat Ritual, Stone Daddy

LOUD AS FOLK (Re-Visited)

Tuesday, December 17

MoN 12/9

Hosted By Spike Mcguire W/ Moses Jones, (Buster Blue) Dave Berry, (Jelly Bread) Lucas Young, Michelle Pappas, Liam Kyle Cahill

Get Shot, Death Valley High & The Flesh Hammers

WICKED TROOPS

Thursday, December 19

W/ Legitimate Cause & Shifty +Guests

NEW YEARS EVE SHOW: THE SADDLE TRAMPS w/ GREG GOLDEN BAND & SPECIAL GUESTS

FRI 12/13

Micawber, Extirpate, Contortion, Through These Gates, Qarin & ostracized

GET PRE-SALE TICKETS NOW: 7 Seconds – December 6 Phenomonauts – December 7 Winds Of Plague – December 13 Youth Brigade + Swingin' Utters – Dec 20 Saddle Tramps + Greg Golden – Dec 31

FRI 12/20

TheAlleySparks.com

Fast Times 80’s Dance Party with DJ Kos

OPINION

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NEWS

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GREEN

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FEATURE STORY

THESE THESE

DON’T DON’T

MIX MIX

Think you know your limits? Think again. If you drink, don’t drive. Period.

(775) 358.8891 906 Victorian Ave, Sparks NV Facebook.TheAlleySparks.com

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ARTS&CULTURE

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IN ROTATION

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ART OF THE STATE

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FOODFINDS

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FILM

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NIGHTCLUBS/CASINOS

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MISCELLANY

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DECEMBER 5, 2013

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RN&R

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THURSDAY 12/5

FRIDAY 12/6

SATURDAY 12/7

SUNDAY 12/8

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY 12/9-12/11

2) Joey Carmon Band, 8pm, no cover

2) Joey Carmon Band, 4pm, Steppen Stonz, 10pm, no cover

2) Joey Carmon Band, 4pm, Steppen Stonz, 10pm, no cover

2) Steppen Stonz, 8pm, no cover

2) Doctor Rock-It, 8pm, M, Tu, W, no cover

2) Hot Rods, 7pm, no cover

2) Hot Rods, 8pm, no cover

2) Hot Rods, 8pm, no cover

2) Herbert Bail Orchestra, 10pm, no cover

1) Head for the Hills, 10pm, no cover

1) Dragon Smoke, Jelly Bread, 9pm, $17-$20

1) Ice Fantasy, call for showtimes, $19.95-$24.95 2) Brazen, 10:30pm, no cover 3) Skyy High Fridays, 10pm, $10 4) Live piano, jazz, 4:30pm, no cover

1) Ice Fantasy, call for showtimes, $19.95-$24.95 2) Brazen, 10:30pm, no cover 3) Four Play Saturdays, 10pm, $10 4) Live piano, jazz, 4:30pm, no cover

1) Ice Fantasy, call for showtimes, $19.95-$24.95 2) Brazen, 10:30pm, no cover 4) Live piano, jazz, 4:30pm, no cover

1) Bay Pointe Ballet’s The Nutcracker, 7pm, $25-$50

1) Bay Pointe Ballet’s The Nutcracker, 2pm, $25-$50

ATLANTIS CASINO RESORT SPA 3800 S. Virginia St., (775) 825-4700 1) Grand Ballroom Stage 2) Cabaret

CARSON VALLEY INN

1627 Hwy. 395, Minden; (775) 782-9711 1) Valley Ballroom 2) Cabaret Lounge 3) Valley Sky Theatre

Head for the Hills Dec. 7, 10 p.m. Crystal Bay Club 14 Highway 28 Crystal Bay 833-6333

CRYSTAL BAY CLUB

14 Hwy. 28, Crystal Bay; (775) 833-6333 1) Crown Room 2) Red Room t

ELDORADO HOTEL CASINO

345 N. Virginia St., (775) 786-5700 1) Showroom 2) Brew Brothers 3) BuBinga Lounge 4) Roxy’s Bar & Lounge 5) Stadium Bar

1) Ice Fantasy, call for showtimes, $19.95-$24.95 2) Brazen, 10:30pm, no cover 4) Live piano, jazz, 4:30pm, no cover

GRAND SIERRA RESORT

Karaoke Bottoms Up Saloon, 1923 Prater Way, Sparks, 359-3677: Th-Sa, 9pm, no cover Elbow Room Bar, 2002 Victorian Ave., Sparks, 359-3526: F, Tu, 7pm; Su, 2pm, no cover Celtic Knot Pub, 541 E. Moana Lane, 829-8886: J.P. and Super Fun Entertainment, Th, 8pm, no cover Flowing Tide Pub, 465 S. Meadows Pkwy., Ste. 5, 284-7707; 4690 Longley Lane, Ste. 30, (775) 284-7610: Karaoke, Sa, 9pm, no cover Sneakers Bar & Grill, 3923 S. McCarran Blvd., 829-8770: Karaoke w/Mark, Sa, 8:30pm, no cover Spiro’s Sports Bar & Grille, 1475 E. Prater Way, Sparks, 356-6000: Music & Karaoke, F, 9pm; Lovely Karaoke, Sa, 9pm, no cover Washoe Club, 112 S. C St., Virginia City, 847-4467: Gothic Productions Karaoke, Sa, Tu, 8pm, no cover

26

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RN&R

| DECEMBER 5, 2013

1) Phoenix, Alt-J, Crosses, 2500 E. Second St., (775) 789-2000 1) Grand Theater 2) WET Ultra Lounge 3) The Beach Terraplane Sun, 7pm, $39.50 4) Summit Pavilion 5) Silver State Pavilion

2) Paul Covarelli, 6pm, Tu, W, no cover

1) Ice Fantasy, call for showtimes, Tu, W, $19.95-$24.95 2) Live Band Karaoke, 10pm, M, Loose Screws, 10pm, Tu, Garage Boys, 10:30pm, no cover 4) Live piano, jazz, 4:30pm W, no cover

HARRAH’S LAKE TAHOE

15 Hwy. 50, Stateline; (775) 588-6611 1) South Shore Room 2) Casino Center Stage 3) Peek Nightclub

3) DJ Keenan, 10:30pm, $20

3) Rick Gee, DJ SN1, 10pm, $20

HARRAH’S RENO

1) Beatles vs. Stones w/Abbey Road and Jumping Jack Flash, 8pm, $25-$35 2) Rockin’ Down the Highway, 9pm, no cover 3) Club Sapphire w/DJ I, 9pm, no cover

1) Beatles vs. Stones w/Abbey Road and Jumping Jack Flash, 8pm, $25-$35 2) Rockin’ Down the Highway, 9pm, no cover 3) Club Sapphire w/DJ I, 9pm, no cover

2) Stew Stewart, 7pm, no cover 3) Colin Ross, 5:30pm, no cover 5) Karaoke Night, 7pm, no cover

2) Stew Stewart, 8pm, no cover 3) Colin Ross, 6pm, no cover

2) Stew Stewart, 8pm, Country at the Cabaret w/DJ Jamie G, 9pm, no cover 3) Colin Ross, 6pm, no cover

2) Verbal Kint, 6pm, no cover 3) 3-D Thursdays w/DJs Max, Chris English, Kronyak, 10pm, $20

2) Buster Blue, 9pm, no cover 3) Salsa dancing with BB of Salsa Reno, 2) Buster Blue, 9pm, no cover 7:30pm, $10 after 8pm, DJ Chris English, 3)Grad Party w/DJ Enferno, 10pm, $20 DJ ((Fredie)), 10pm, $20

2) Kyle Williams, 6pm, no cover

2) Kyle Williams, 6pm, M, Tu, W, no cover

1) Merle Haggard, 8pm, $52.50-$65.50 2) Live music/DJ, 9pm, no cover 3) Fashion Friday, 7pm, no cover 4) Live music, 8:30pm, no cover

2) Recovery Sundays, 10pm, no cover 3) Midnight Mass, 9pm, no cover 4) Live music, 6:30pm, no cover

2) Gong Show Karaoke, 8pm, Tu, no cover 3) Step This Way (dubstep, house), 8pm, W, no cover

219 N. Center St., (775) 788-2900 1) Sammy’s Showroom 2) The Zone 3) Sapphire Lounge 4) Plaza 5) Convention Center

JOHN ASCUAGA’S NUGGET

1100 Nugget Ave., Sparks; (775) 356-3300 1) Showroom 2) Cabaret 3) Orozko 4) Rose Ballroom 5) Trader Dick’s

PEPPERMILL RESORT SPA CASINO 2707 S. Virginia St., (775) 826-2121 1) Tuscany Ballroom 2) Terrace Lounge 3) Edge 4) Capri Ballroom

SILVER LEGACY

407 N. Virginia St., (775) 325-7401 3) Social Network Night, 9pm, no cover 1) Grand Exposition Hall 2) Rum Bullions Island Bar 4) Live music, 6:30pm, no cover 3) Aura Ultra Lounge 4) Silver Baron Lounge 5) Drinx Lounge

2) Live music/DJ, 9pm, no cover 3) Seduction Saturdays, 9pm, $5 4) Live music, 8:30pm, no cover

2) Country at the Cabaret w/DJ Jamie G, 7pm, W, no cover


For a complete listing of this week’s events, visit newsreview.com/reno

SANTA x 3

NICE

NAUGHTY

C HR I S T M A S C E L E B R AT I O N S The holidays have arrived and there’s plenty to do if you’re in the mood for some Christmas cheer. Here’s a brief list of things to do this week. The Sparks Hometowne Christmas celebration kicks off with a tree lighting ceremony at 6:30 p.m. on Friday, Dec. 6, at Saint Mary’s Amphitheater on Victorian Avenue. The event continues on Saturday, Dec. 7 in downtown Sparks with the parade at 1 p.m. Floats, marching bands, dancing horses and various groups will participate in the parade which travels along the west bound lane of Victorian Avenue from Pyramid Way to 14th Street. Santa Claus will also visit with children in the Glendale Schoolhouse. Admission is free. Visit www.cityofsparks.us. The Wilbur D. May Museum at Rancho San Rafael Regional Park, 1595 N. Sierra St., hosts the Tuba Christmas Concert on Saturday, Dec. 7. The free event features classic holiday carols arranged in four-part harmony, which will performed by local tuba, baritone and euphonium players. The museum will have festive decorations on display and children can try a holiday scavenger to win a prize. Hot cocoa, cider and cookies will also be available. Tuba Christmas performances are held each year all over the world, but this is the only event in Northern Nevada. Call (775) 785-5961 or visit www.maycenter.com. The Reno Philharmonic and conductor Jason Altieri present the “Spirit of the Season” holiday concert featuring the Reno Phil’s orchestra and chorus, guest vocalist and former American Idol contestant LaKisha Jones, students from the Reno Phil’s Celebrate Strings program and other guests. Performances are 2 p.m. and 8 p.m. on Saturday, Dec. 7, and 2 p.m. on Sunday, Dec. 8, at Pioneer Center for the Performing Arts, 100 S. Virginia St. Tickets are $12-$67. Call 323-6393 or visit www.renophil.com.

—Kelley Lang OPINION

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NEWS

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GREEN

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FEATURE STORY

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ARTS&CULTURE

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ART OF THE STATE

|

FROSTY JR .

GAMES AFOOT OR H O L ME S F O R H O L IDAY S

A R G E N TA C O N C E R T S E R IE S : RITE OF SPRING

Reno Little Theater presents Ken Ludwig’s comic whodunit. William Gillette, an American actor who portrayed Sherlock Holmes in a 1916 silent film, must assume the persona of Holmes to catch a killer when a guest at his Christmas party is murdered. The play opens Friday, Dec. 6, at Reno Little Theater, 147 E. Pueblo St. Performances are 7:30 p.m. on Thursday, Friday and Saturday through Dec. 21 and 2 p.m. on Sunday through Dec. 22. Tickets are $16 for general admission and $13 for seniors, students and military personnel. Call 8138900 or go to www.renolittletheater.org.

Pianist Jon Kimura Parker will perform Igor Stravinsky’s The Rite of Spring on a grand piano in celebration of the 100th anniversary of the provocative and influential orchestral composition. Pianists Hyeyeon Park and James Winn will join Parker to perform works by Mozart, Ravel and other composers. The performance takes place at 7:30 p.m. on Wednesday, Dec. 11, at Nightingale Concert Hall inside the Church Fine Arts Building, 1335 N. Virginia St., at the University of Nevada, Reno. Tickets are $25 for adults and for $5 students. Call 784-3555 or visit www.unr.edu/cla/music/acs.

GET ‘EM TO MEMPHIS FUNDRAISER The Reno Blues Society sponsors two fundraisers for local blues bands The Rick Hammond Band and South Saturn Delta to help pay for their expenses as they travel to Memphis, Tenn., next month to represent Reno and Northern Nevada at the International Blues Challenge. The first fundraiser takes place at 7 p.m. on Wednesday, Dec. 11, at the Sands Regency’s 3rd Street Lounge, 345 N. Arlington Ave. The second one takes place at 8 p.m. on Saturday, Jan. 18, at Sidelines Bar, 1237 Baring Blvd., Sparks. There is a suggested door donation of $5. Call (775) 750-6115 or visit www.renoblues.org.

FOODFINDS

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FILM

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MUSICBEAT

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NIGHTCLUBS/CASINOS

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THIS WEEK

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MISCELLANY

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DECEMBER 5, 2013

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RN&R

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27


75% TreaT yourself To gifT cerTificaTes up To

OFF! Visit www.newsreview.com

Some like it hot mess Join Us As We Celebrate the

Holidays. You’re invited to our holiday open house. We have a lot to be thankful for during this holiday season because of our friends, neighbors and clients. It is a pleasure to be a part of this community. In that spirit, we invite you to bring your family and friends to join us for our holiday open house as we say “thank you” to our clients, friends and community. Happy Holidays! When: Tuesday December 17th | 1p.m. until 4p.m. Where: Edward Jones Investments 604 W. Washington St. Ste F | Carson City NV 89703 Please call 775-882-5566 today to let us know if you and a guest can attend.

28   |  RN&R   | 

DECEMBER 5, 2013

Why do “helpless” women have men constantly doting on them, while women like me are deemed “too strong”? I was raised by a 1970s feminist and single mother. (“A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle!”) At 21, I became a widowed single mother. I put myself through school and own a home and a business. I now have a boyfriend who feels I don’t “need” him enough. He says I need to drop some of the balls I’m juggling so he can pick them up. “Just take them!” I say. We recently had a yard sale, and I did everything and was resentful and exhausted. I threw a little fit and walked away. My man then put forth a superhuman effort and cleaned everything up. But, as usual, he didn’t handle things until I was unable to. The modern damsel doesn’t have to be in distress, but it helps if she at least has a few items not yet crossed off her to-do list. Otherwise, what is there for Superman to do but smoke a bowl and make YouTube videos of the cat riding the Roomba? No sooner did you find a man who says he wants to help than you immediately raised the bar. It isn’t enough that he’s willing to take out the trash from under the sink. You expect him to sense that you want him to and then wrestle you for the bag. What’s with this? Did you get comfy with the belief that women don’t need men and are you now intent on confirming

that? Could it be that having him help conflicts with your self-image as the suburban Joan of Arc—if not burning at the stake, cooking up the steak while burning with rage about how you have to do it all? You can have the martyrdom merit badge or a relationship—pick one. Consider that maybe being a strong woman means being strong enough to admit that you need a man for something besides yelling at when he gives the wrong answer to “Do I look fat in this?” You will have to ask for help, which may be easier if you think of this as sending your boyfriend on little “quests” to make him feel needed. Though you probably don’t need a Holy Grail, you could ask him to wield power tools or run up to Rite Aid to get your kid some cold meds. While he’s gone, here’s a suggestion: Write out that dumb fish/bicycle quote. Burn it. Scatter the ashes. And replace it in your head with an update on a classic: “It’s the squeaky wheel that gets the grease—that is, if it doesn’t run off and grease itself before anybody else can get up out of his chair to go look for the can.” Ω

Got a problem? Write Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave., No. 280, Santa Monica,CA 90405, or email AdviceAmy@aol.com (www.advicegoddess.com).


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OPINION   |   NEWS   |   GREEN   |   feature story  |   ARTS&CULTURE   |   IN ROTATION   |   ART OF THE STATE   |   FOODFINDS   |   FILM  |   MUSICBEAT   |   NIGHTCLUBS/CASINOS   |   THIS WEEK   |   MISCELLANY   |   december 5, 2013  |  

RN&R  

| 

29


OODFINDS

by rob brezsny

Recycle this paper

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Sometimes I

think too fast and too much. My logic gets sterile. My ideas become jagged and tangled. When this happens, I head off to Turtle Back Hill for a hike through the saltwater marsh. The trail loops around on itself, and I arrive back where I started in about 15 minutes. Sometimes I keep walking, circumambulating four or five times. Going in circles like this seems to help me knit together my fragmented thoughts. Often, by the time I’m finished, my mind feels unified. I recommend you find your own version of this ritual, Aries. From what I can tell, you need to get rounder and softer.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In the mid-

19th century, French art was dominated by the government-sponsored salon, whose conservative policies thwarted upcoming new trends like Impressionism. One anti-authoritarian painter who rebelled was Camille Pissarro. “What is the best way to further the evolution of French art?” he was asked. “Burn down the Louvre,” he replied. The Louvre, as you may know, was and still is a major art museum in Paris. Judging from your current astrological omens, I surmise that you might want to make a symbolic statement equivalent to Pissarro’s. It’s time for you to graduate from traditions that no longer feed you so you can freely seek out new teachers and influences.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): “Lead us not

into temptation, and deliver us from evil” is a request that Christians make of God when they say the Lord’s Prayer. If we define “temptation” as an attraction to things that feel good even though they’re bad for you, this part of the prayer is perfectly reasonable. But what if “temptation” is given a different interpretation? What if it means an attraction to something that feels pleasurable and will ultimately be healthy for you even though it initially causes disruptions? I suggest you consider experimenting with this alternative definition, Gemini. For now, whatever leads you into temptation could possibly deliver you from evil.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): “You get

tragedy where the tree, instead of bending, breaks,” said the philosopher Ludwig Wittgenstein. But you don’t have to worry about that outcome, Cancerian. The storm might howl and surge, but it will ultimately pass. And although your tree may bend pretty far, it will not break. Two weeks from now, you won’t be mourning your losses, but rather celebrating your flexibility and resilience. Congratulations in advance!

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): It’s a perfect time to

start reclaiming some of the superpowers you had when you were a child. What’s that you say? You didn’t have any superpowers? That’s not true. Before you entered adolescence, you could see things and know things and feel things that were off-limits, even unknown, to most adults. You possessed a capacity to love the world with wild purity. Your innocence allowed you to be in close touch with the intelligence of animals and the spirits of the ancestors. Nature was so vividly alive to you that you could hear its songs. Smells were more intense. The dreams you had at night were exciting and consoling. Your ability to read people’s real energy—and not be fooled by their social masks—was strong. Remember?

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Not all darkness

is bad. You know that. Sometimes you need to escape from the bright lights. It can be restorative to sit quietly in the pitch blackness and drink in the mystery of the Great Unknown. The same is true for silence and stillness and aloneness. Now and then you’ve got to retreat into their protective sanctuary. Dreaming big empty thoughts in the tranquil depths can heal you and recharge you. The magic moment has arrived for this kind of rejuvenation, Virgo.

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DECEMBER 5, 2013 NIGHTCLUBS/CASINOS

Clueless, the character played by Alicia Silverstone describes someone as a “full-on Monet.” What she means is that the person in question is like a painting by the French Impressionist artist Claude Monet. “From far away, it’s OK,”says Silverstone. “But up close, it’s a big old mess.” You may still be at the far-away point in your evaluation of a certain situation in your own life, Libra. It appears interesting, even attractive, from a distance. When you draw nearer, though, you may find problems. That doesn’t necessarily mean you should abandon it altogether. Maybe you can fix the mess so it’s as engaging up close as it is from far away.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Your power

animal for the coming months is the bateleur eagle of Africa. In the course of searching for its meals, it covers about 250 square miles every day. It thinks big. It has a spacious scope. I hope you get inspired by its example, Scorpio. In 2014, I’d love to see you enlarge the territory where you go hunting for what you want. Fate will respond favorably if you expand your ideas about how to gather the best allies and resources. As for this week, I suggest you get very specific as you identify the goals you will pursue in the coming months by exploring farther and wider.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): The

standard dictionary says that “righteous” is a word that means virtuous and highly moral. The slang dictionary says that “righteous” describes someone or something that’s absolutely genuine and wonderful. Urban Dictionary suggests that “righteous” refers to the ultimate version of any type of experience, especially “sins of pleasure” like lust and greed. According to my analysis, the coming week will be jampacked with righteousness for you. Which of the three definitions will predominate? It’s possible you will embody and attract all three types.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19):

In the dreams you’re having at night, Capricorn, I bet you’re traveling through remote landscapes in all kinds of weather. Maybe you’re recreating the voyage of the Polynesian sailors who crossed hundreds of miles of Pacific Ocean to find Hawaii 1,500 years ago. Or maybe you’re hiking through the Darkhad Valley, where the Mongolian steppe meets Siberia’s vast forests. It’s possible you’re visiting places where your ancestors lived, or you’re migrating to the first human settlement on Mars in the 22nd century. What do dreams like this mean? I think you’re trying to blow your own mind. Your deep self and your higher wisdom are conspiring to flood you with new ways of seeing reality.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): It

wouldn’t be too extreme for you to kiss the ground that has been walked on by people you care about deeply. And it wouldn’t be too crazy to give your special allies the best gifts ever, or compose love letters to them, or demonstrate in dramatic fashion how amazed you are by the beautiful truths about who they really are. This is a unique moment in your cycle, Aquarius—a time when it is crucial for you to express gratitude, devotion and even reverence for those who have helped you see what it means to be fully alive.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): In a letter to

F. Scott Fitzgerald, Ernest Hemingway described his vision of paradise. It would have a trout stream that no one but him was permitted to fish in. He’d own two houses, one for his wife and children and one for his nine beautiful mistresses. There’d be a church where he could regularly confess his sins, and he’d have great seats at an arena where bullfights took place. From my perspective, this is a pretty vulgar version of paradise, but who am I to judge? I suggest you draw inspiration from Hemingway as you come up with your own earthy, gritty, funky fantasy of paradise. It’s an excellent time for you to get down to earth about your high ideals and dreamy hopes.

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s expanded weekly audio horoscopes and daily text message horoscopes. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at (877) 873-4888 or (900) 950-7700.

MINIOFRENO.COM MINIOFRENO.COM

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LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): In the movie

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THIS WEEK

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SEPTEMBER 12, 2013

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by D. Brian Burghart D. Brian Burghart

Snow angel Nellie Aguilar You’d think with all the media attention to this approaching snow storm, all the Facebook updates and letters home from the Washoe County School District, the University of Nevada, Reno would have been ready with plows and snow shovels and salt for the steps. Not so, and snow was melted and refrozen long before the administration sprang into action. One hardy grounds worker was ready, scraping sidewalks in front of the journalism building so we less-than-hardy journos could make it into the building before we busted our butts.

So what are you going to do to clean up all this snow? I work for Grounds. I’m a maintenance worker for Grounds. What we do with the snow is we have Gators with the plows. [Gators are the green six-wheeled utility vehicles seen on campus.] We have the mowers with the plows. We have the trucks, and we have the sand. So we’ll be able to take care of the students and not have them slip on all this snow. We have to keep all these roads clean. We have to shovel and do everything we can.

Yeah, that’s going to be a trip for him.

What advice do you have for kids who have to walk through this snow?

Five in the morning.

Do you think it’s going to be a big snow?

NEWS

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GREEN

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What will be the next thing you do to clean off all this snow?

I think so. It’s coming. It’s coming pretty quick.

I’m going to grab the squeegee right now because somebody else is going to get the Gator with the plow. I’m going to grab the squeegee to just make a path right down the middle so the kids won ’t slip on it. I’m also going to do the major things with the handicap ramps and all the access for the buildings.

I can hear you have an accent. Where are you originally from? I’m Hispanic.

Do you come from a place that had snow?

Now let me get your picture.

No, I don’t. See the thing is, I was born here in America. I lived in California, and now I’m in Reno. So it’s hard, you know, because it snows here, and it’s cold. But I like it, and I’m used to it.

Oh my god, I didn’t brush my hair. [Laughs.] Man, I didn’t bring my snowboots because I didn’t think [it] was going to snow. It was so nice this morning. Ω

∫y Bruce Van Dye

Amid the mediagasm of JFK nostalgia, I was curious about one thing—the population of the USA on 11/22/63. Turns out it was about 180 million. So that means in the 50 years since, America has grown by 135 million people. Yoiks. From this number, we can conclude one thing. We seem to really enjoy breeding. • In the recent news flurry about Obamacare, filibuster reform and JFK, one very important story from our western neighbor got sorta overlooked. And it shouldn’t be. The state of California just announced a surplus for fiscal year 2013. About $2 billion worth. Repeating, the state of California is gonna be in the black this year, with a surplus of TWO BILLION DOLLARS. This extraordinary news comes from a state that in fiscal ’09 was about 60 billion in the red. Just further proof that good things can happen, and happen fast, when you tax the rich people properly. Which is exactly what happened here. Californians wised up in ’12 and passed Prop 30, which enabled the govern|

One good, good thing is once we clear one path, we want them to walk on that path so they don’t slip, so they don’t have an accident. We usually try to make a salt on the side of the snow, so don’t try to get some of that [on your shoes]. Try not to step on it. It usually gets hard, and it will hurt your legs.

What time did you get here to start this cleanup?

Potpourri

OPINION

Me, too. My son, though—today will be his first day driving home from school in snow.

Then, a few miles down the road, the constipation returns. Back to creeping at 2 to 4 mph. After a few miles of this, once again it lightens up and we’re all cruising at 70. And then, just outside of Hornetville, more clogged slowdown. There are never any wrecks or explanations for this strange pisser of stop and go. No construction crews. I’m going goofy trying to figure out what is now a major WTF. All I know is that this is apparently gonna keep happening, and it sucks. Then it hits me. There are no wrecks. There is no construction. I’m in the midst of one massive Californicated CF. This is the Sunday of Thanksgiving weekend. This mighty interstate is simply being overwhelmed by all the bozos, ding dongs and numchuks who are heading back to LA after the holiday. Holy freakin’ gridlock, Batman. I will now completely support any candidate who will offer free vasectomies to all American adult males. Ω

ment to (1) increase the state sales tax by 25 percent through 2016, and (2) raise state income taxes on people making $250,000 a year. At the risk of being broken record redundant, I’ll remind that the reason you raise the taxes on wealthy people is very simple. Because they’re the ones that have the money. Also, their checks don’t bounce. This basic rule of finance was laid out there years ago by legendary economist John Maynard Krebs. • I was driving along Interstate 5 late on the Sunday afternoon of Thanksgiving weekend. I’m just getting into that long, boring stretch that runs from south of Stockton to Bakersfield. Right off, near the gas stop of Westley, it’s obvious that traffic is pretty thick. In fact, just past Westley, it stops. Full on big city urban freeway slowdown scene, except that we’re out here in the sticks, between the metropoli of Westley and Spitoon. OK, I grumble, must be a wreck up ahead. Only there ain’t no wreck. We creep along at 5 mph for a few miles, and then, suddenly, we’re back to normal, cruising at 70. Dandy.

FEATURE STORY

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ARTS&CULTURE

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ART OF THE STATE

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FOODFINDS

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