KEEPING THE FAITH IN TROUBLED TIMES
RememberingCliffordandVirginiaDurr
Inthe WorksandDays Hesiodrecountsthat ZeussentPandoratoEpimetheuswh o...was seducedbyherbeautyandmadeherhiswife. Now,Epimetheushadalargeearthenwarepot, coveredwithalid,whichcontainedalltheevils andonegood:hope.Pandorahadhardly reachedEarthwhen,overcomewithcuriosity, sheliftedthelidofthepotandreleasedallthe illsintheworld.Onlyhope,whichwasatthe bottom,wastrappedinthepotwhenPandora replacedthelid.
Otherversionsofthelegendsaythatthepot containednotalltheworld’sillsbuteveryblessing.Byopeningitcarelessly,sheletallthegood thingsescapeandreturntotheheavensinstead ofstayingamongmankind.Thatiswhymen areafflictedwitheveryformofevil:onlyhope, apoorconsolation,islefttothem.
—TheDictionaryofClassical Mythology, PierreGrimal
Laesperanzamuereu´ltima .Hopedieslast. —JessiedelaCruz
Introduction H OPEHASNEVERTRICKLEDDOWN .Ithasalwayssprung up.That’swhatJessiedelaCruzmeantwhenshesaid,“Ifeelthere’s gonnabeachange,butwe’retheonesgonnadoit,notthegovernment.Withus,there’sasaying,‘Laesperanzamuereu´ltima. Hopedies last.’Youcan’tlosehope.Ifyoulosehope,youloseeverything.”
She,aretiredfarmworker,wasrecountingthedaysbeforeCesar Chavezandhisstoop-laborcolleaguesfoundedtheUnitedFarm Workers(UFW).Itwasametaphorformuchofthetwentiethcentury.
Asweenterthenewmillennium,hopeappearstobeanAmerican attributethathasvanishedformany,nomatterwhattheirclassor conditioninlife.Theofficialwordhasneverbeenmorearrogantly imposed.Passivity,inthefaceofsuchabold,unabashedshowof powerfromabove,appearstobetheorderoftheday.Butitain’t necessarilyso.
Letterstotheeditorsofevenourmoreconservativepapersindicatesomethingelse,somethingthatdoesnotmakethesixo’clock news:astirringshowofdiscontentinthefields,agrowingdisbelief intheofficialword.
Thisisnotanewstory.Itisastrainthathasrunthroughthe centurypast,thoughnotasinextremisasinthisone.
DuringtheGreatDepression,afterthecrashcameand Variety’s headlinewas“WallStreetLaysanEgg,”hopewasatlowtide.*There wasdespairaswellasbreadlines.
Yetsomethingwashappeningfrombelow.True,theNewDeal ofPresidentFranklinD.Rooseveltwasendowedwithenlightened
*Variety wasthetradepaperoftheentertainmentworld,renownedforits raffishheadlines.
menandwomenwhorecognizedtheneedsofthemany.Butthat alonedidn’tturnthetrickoftransformingdespairintohope.
Therewasalwayspressurefrombelow:frombeleagueredandembattledfarmerscomingoutofthewoods;frombig-cityneighborhoodalliances,defyingevictingbailiffs;fromathreatenedmarchon Washingtonbyblacktradeunionists,leadingtothepassageofthe FairEmploymentPracticesAct;andevenfromsomeforgottenman whoswungfromachandelierduringaWaldorf-Astoriadinnerof baffledindustrialists,shouting“Socialsecurity!”Itwastheveryfirst timeIhadeverheardthatphrase.Naturally,hewassubjectedto psychiatriccare.Ofcourse,thatlonerdidn’tcausesocialsecurityto cometobe,buthedidhelpitalong.AtleastIknewwhatitmeant when,duringtheNewDeal,itcametopass.
Thesetroublemakerswere,bydefinition,activists(active: 1.Inaction,moving.2.Causingorinitiatingchange.3.Engaging,contributing,participating).Theyfeltthatwhattheydidcountedandthat theythemselvescounted.ThusitwasthatoutoftheDepression, andduringit,hopewasspringingforth.
ShortlyafterWorldWarIIcameprosperity;therewas“achicken ineverypot,andacarineverygarage,”andmore,muchmore.*But alongwithitcamethecoldwar,thewitch-hunt.Andsilence.
Thosewhospokeoutonbehalfofthosestilldispossessedmore thanpaidtheirdues.Hopeforthatmoreequitablesocietytookan awfulbeatingduringthesebleaktimes.
Andyet,seeminglyoutofnowhere,camethe’60s,ledbystudents fromallsortsofcampuses.Agreatmanyofthemknewnothingof the’30s,yettheretheywere.AlongwithAfricanAmericans,rediscoveringalostlegacy,theyhelpedendamaladventureinSoutheast Asiaaswellasplayaroleintheadvancementofcivilrights.Itwas atimeoftumultuousnessandhope.
Sowecometotoday,threeyearsintothenewmillennium.As SeanO’Casey’sCaptainBoyle,gloriouslydrunk,mumbledtohis buddyJoxer,“Thewur-r-rldisinaterriblestateofchassis.”The chaos,anditsaccompanyingterrorsafoot,isinnosmallwayattributedtothewantonnessofourappointedchieftainandhisarmchair warriors.
*AphraseusedbyPresidentHerbertHooverduringhis1932campaign.
Itwouldbemanifestlyunfairtoblamethetroubleswhollyonone administration.Ithasbeenthedarkdividendofallouradventures sincethecoldwar.Butnow,withtheworld’shope,theUnited Nations,beingconstantlyhumiliatedbyourpublicservants,weare seeingenemieseverywhere,evenamongourformerallies.Thomas Paine’svisionoftheAmericanisbeingprofaned.Whathewrotein 1791isonthebuttonin2003:“Freedomhadbeenhuntedround theglobe;reasonwasconsideredasrebellion;andtheslaveryoffear hadmademenafraidtothink.Butsuchistheirresistiblenatureof truththatallitasks,andallitwants,isthelibertyofappearing Insuchasituation,manbecomeswhatheought.Heseeshisspecies, notwiththeinhumanideaofanaturalenemy,butasakindred.”
Hereiswheretheactivistsenterthepicture,astheyalwayshave. Paineassumedasocietynotsimplyofcitizens,butof thinking citizens.Hisslimbookssoldinthescoresofthousands,equivalentto millionstoday.
Inthefollowingpagesareportraitsoftheinheritorsofthelegacy ofthosepast.Theyrangeinagefromnonagenarianstoyoungones intheirtwenties.Activismneednotbeaprofessioninitself,asitis inmanycaseshere.Itcanbeinthewritingofalettertotheeditor ortoyourcongressperson;itcanbeintakingpartinalocalaction oranationaloneor,forthatmatter,aworldwideone;itcanbein attendingarallyormarchinginaparade;itcanbeinanyform,freely expressingyourgrievanceoryourhope.
Manyhadneverparticipatedinsuchmattersbefore,atleastnot publicly.Inexpressingtheirgrievancesandhopes,theyhadbecome activists.NicholasvonHoffmanputitsuccinctlyseveralyearsago: “Ofteninputtingrighttheirprivatewrongs,groupsofpeoplehave re-animatedourpublicrights.Youwhothoughtofyourselfassimply beinganumbersuddenlyspringtolife.Yougotthatmostintoxicatingfeelingthatyoucanmakehistory;thatyoureallycount.”
Inthesepages,RobertaLynch,aChicagolabororganizer,observes:“It’saboutaction.Youfeelthatthingscanhappen,thepossibility,thehope.Youfeelordinarypeoplecandoextraordinary things.Somethingcomesalongunexpectedly,somethingnoone couldhavepredicted.”SheisparaphrasingsomethingBobTravis,a strikeleader,saidin1937,andBobKelly,aHarvardcustodian,echoedin2002:“Peoplecansurpriseyou.”
Whowouldhavethoughtthatcollegestudentsandblue-collar workerswouldhavebecomeabandofbrothersatSeattle,andduring theHarvardstudentsit-downstrikeonbehalfoftheuniversity’s custodians?Didtheseyoungtroublemakersknowtheywereinthe traditionoftheautoworkerswhoin1937satdownforforty-four daysattheGeneralMotorsplantinFlint,Michigan?Thedifference layinthestudentsdoingitforothers,notthemselves.Thishadnever happenedinthe’60s,thoughthatremarkabledecadebroughtforth manyunprecedentedadvances.
Inallepochs,therewereatfirstdoubtsandthefearofstepping forthandspeakingout,buttheattributethatspurredthewarriors onwashope.Andthe act.Seldomwasthereadespairorasenseof hopelessness.Someofthoseonthesidelines,thespectators,feeling helplessandimpotent,hadbytheverynatureofthepassionateact ofothersbecomeimbuedwithhopethemselves.
Today,fromunexpectedsources,comesagrowingchallengeto theofficialword.Notonlyamongpeaceadvocates,thesilentaswell astheoutspoken,oramongenvironmentalists,oramongfeminists, butalsoamongsmallinvestorscheatedbycorporateEnronism,as wellasthoseinvolvedinothercausestoonumeroustorecount.It maynotbethestuffthatmakesaTVsoundbite,butit’sthestuff ofneighborhood.It’sthestuffsetoffbythosewhosteppedforth andmadetheword activist acommonnouninourvocabulary;anew vocation.
WhenIwasfirstbeginningthisbook,Ihadmydoubts.Hope, asatheme,seemedtooabstract.Myearlierworksdealtwithspecifics,visceralstuff:theDepression,war,thejob,race,age,and death.Itwasamatterofpersonalexperience,ofpeopledealingwith whathappenedorwashappeningtothem—conditionsthatwere imposedonthem.
Activistshavealwaysbattledtheodds.Butit’snotamatterof Sisyphusrollingthatstoneupthehill.It’snotBeckett’sblindPozzo staggeringon.It’smorelikealegionofDavids,withallsortsof slingshots.It’snotoneslingshotthatwilldoit.Norwillithappen atonce.It’salonghaul.It’sstepbystep.AsMahaliaJacksonsang out,“We’reonourway”—nottoCannonLand,perhaps,buttothe worldasabetterplacethanithasbeenbefore.
It’swhatKathyKellyandherVoicesintheWildernessprojectis allabout.SheisadirectdescendantofDorothyDay,whowhen askedwhyshewasmakingsomuchtroublefortheauthoritiesansweredsimply,“I’mworkingtowardaworldinwhichitwouldbe easierforpeopletobehavedecently.”
PersonalNotes M AY 8,1945,wasthemosthopefuldayofmylifeasIhadthus farlivedit.ItwasV-EDay.NaziGermanyhadunconditionallysurrendered.Thateveningwasespeciallyexhilarating.MywifeandI wereguestsofaChicagoartistandhiswife.Therewasoneother couple.
Thereweredrinksbeforedinner,whichpromisedtobeasumptuousone.IsuggestedwetuneinCBSradio,asaprogramcelebrating theeventwasabouttobebroadcast.NormanCorwin,radio’smost honoredbard,hadwrittenaone-hourprogram, OnaNoteofTriumph.
“Itwasalsoonanoteofhope,”Corwinrecalled.“Considerhow frequentlyweusethatword.‘Ihopealliswellwithyou.’Theidioms: ‘Hopeforthebest.’‘Wherethere’slife,there’shope.’Weevenhave ahopechest.Thinkofthenegatives,too:‘fainthope’and‘beyond hope.’Theprogramendedwithaprayerofhope.”Heshuthiseyes asherecitedfrommemory:“‘Letthesingingfade,thecelebrantsgo home.Thebowlisdrainedandempty,andthetoastsaredrunk.The gunsarestill,thetanksgaraged,theplanesrestinthehangar.Only thenightremains.Outsidethedewofmorningglistenslikeahope.’”
Aswelistenedtransfixedduringthewholehour,thedinnergrew cold,butitdidn’tloseitsflavor;ithadtheaddednutrient:hope. Fascismwasdead,andanewworldwasa-borning,itsagencythe UnitedNations.
NancyArnotHarjan,inMenloPark,thirtymilessouthofSan Francisco,sharedthatsalubriousfeeling.“IdorememberV-EDay. Oh,suchajoyousthing.ItwasinearlyMay.Itwasmyyounger brother’sbirthday,andmyolderbrotherwouldmostlikelybecoming home.
“SanFranciscowaschosenforthefirstsessionoftheUN.Iwas ecstatic... somehowwarwouldneverhappenagain.Theymetin Juneof’45attheWarMemorialOperaHouse.Theyneededushers,
soIsigneduptodothat.IwasstillinmylittleMissBurkeSchool uniform.Littlemiddyandskirt.IrememberusheringasJanSmuts ofSouthAfricawastakingthestand.Icouldn’thearthatverywell. ButIwasthrilledtobethere.Iwaspartofit.Andsodeeplyproud. Andsohopeful.ThatwasbeforeHiroshima.”
Wewere,allofus,foggilyawareofanewdimensionbeingadded totheadventurousnatureofwar:theatombomb.Theimmediate reactionofmostofus,myselfincluded,wasoneofimmeasurable relief.OurGIfriends,BillMauldin’sWillieandJoe,oursonsand brothersstillinEurope,weresparedtheinvasionoftheJapanese mainisland,whereperhapsupwardofamillionofthemmightbe killed.
OnAugust10,1945—orwasittheeleventh?—Iwasontheair, acommentatoratWCFL,theChicagoFederationofLaborradio station.Oneofmyfewsurvivingcontemporaries,whotunedinfaithfullytoallmymeanderings,stillrememberedmylettinggoapublic sigh:“ThankGodit’sover.”
Though“thegoodwar”wasover,somethingelsewasgettingunderway,somethinglesssanguine,lesshopeful.Thehoveringpresenceofthemostdevastatingmeansofsuddendeathenmasseever conceivedbyman,thebomb,possessedusall.
Thecoldwarhadbegun.Forprofessionalpatriotsathome,ithad becomeboomtimeindomesticaswellasforeignaffairs.Theword communist hadbecometheall-encompassingpejorativethatwasto includescoresofthousandsofliberalandlefttemperament.
Fearhadreplacedhopeasthetemperoftheland.Today,we commemoratethetragiceraasMcCarthyism.Andyet,eveninthose darkdays,therewerethosewhostoodupfortheirbeliefs.Clifford andVirginiaDurr,towhomIdedicatethisbook,wereamongthose.
AnAugustevening,1965.TheSelma-Montgomerymarchhad reacheditsdestination:themansionofGeorgeWallace,governorof Alabama.Acoupleofhundredthousand fromalloverthecountry had appearedatthiscivilrightsdemonstration.Itwasopenhouseatthe Durrs’.Itwasalwaysopenhouseat2FelderStreetforoutcasts, scholars,libertarians,dreamers,troublemakers,waifs,andeccentrics: allthosewhoinsistedonbeingcounted.
CliffordandVirginiaDurrhadlivedinMontgomery,“cradleof theConfederacy,”mostoftheirlives,ashadtheirparentsandgrandparentsbeforethem.CliffhadbeenRosaParks’slawyerwhenshe wasarrestedfornotsurrenderingherseatonthebustoawhiteman. Virginiawasforeverspeakingout.Theydidn’tcourttrouble,but neitherdidtheyrunawayfromit;naturally,theywerealwaysin trouble.
CliffordDurrhadadistinguishedcareerasalawyerinWashington. AsamemberoftheFederalCommunicationsCommission(FCC) duringtheadministrationofFranklinD.Roosevelt,hewrotetheBlue Book,anaffirmationofradiolisteners’rights.When,duringHarry Truman’sadministration,hewasaskedtosignaloyaltyoath,he refused.“Notyou,Cliff,”thepresidentexplained,“merelyyour staff.”Durrwasadamant:“Iwillnotsubmitanymemberofmystaff tothatindignity.”Andheresigned.
IfirstranintoVirginiaFosterDurr,asister-in-lawofSupreme CourtjusticeHugoBlack,backintheearlyforties.SheandDr.Mary McLeodBethune,theAfricanAmericaneducator,weretouringthe countryonbehalfoftheCommitteetoAbolishthePollTax.
ItwasatOrchestraHall,Chicago.OnthatSundayafternoon,the placewaspackedtooverflowing.ThoughDr.Bethunewasherusual eloquentself,itwasthelankyfortyishsouthernwhitewomanwho setallheartsafire.Iwentbackstagetocongratulateher.AsIextendedmyhand,sheputforthhers.Initwereaboutahundred leaflets.“Thankyou,dear.Nowyouhurryandpassthemout.Dr. BethuneandIarespeakingattheAbyssinianBaptistChurchintwo hours.Hurry,dear.”
Naturally,shewascalledbeforetheEastlandInternalSecurity Committee.*Onthestand,shewasmostuncooperative,regarding thesenatorwithundisguiseddisdainandhisquestionsasirrelevant, impertinent,andvulgar.Duringmostofhisinquisition,sheignored themassaofMississippi’sSunflowerCounty,takingouthercompact andpowderinghernose.Inexplainingherbehaviortotheawed journalists,shesaidoffhandedly,“Iconsiderthatmanascommon *JamesEastlandwasasenatorfromMississippiin1941andbetween1943 and1978.
aspigtracks.”Asigh:“Oh,I’mafraidI’mjustanold-fashioned southernsnob.”
Eastland’stargetwastheSouthernConferenceforHumanWelfare (SCHW),consistingprimarilyofsouthernwhites.Duringthemidforties,theSCHW,initsregistrationdrives,hadtripledthenumber ofblackvotersintheSouth.Mrs.Durrwasafoundingmember.*
AnotherwasMylesHorton,founderoftheHighlanderFolk SchoolinMonteagle,Tennessee(nowinKnoxville;itwasdrivenout ofitsoriginalhomebecauseofastatepunitivestatute,asaresultof whichtheirpropertywasconfiscated).Theschoolwas,ofcourse, integrated,devotedtoteachinglaborandcivilrightsorganizersthe whys,wherefores,andhowsoftheirmissions.Amongitsvisitors wereMartinLutherKingJr.andRosaParks.
Anafterthought:Mrs.ParkshadworkedasaseamstressforMrs. Durr.Oftentheyhadconversationsaboutconditions.ItwasVirginia whopersuadedMrs.ParkstoattendHighlander.ThatMrs.Parks subsequentlybecamesecretarytoE.D.Nixon,headoftheMontgomeryNAACP,wasnoaccident.Norwasitsimplyaspontaneous impulsethatinducedRosaParkstodefytheMontgomeryordinance andthusmakehistory.Shenowknewshecounted.
I’vealwayswonderedwhatmadeVirginiaandCliffordDurrtick. Mrs.Durr,asthedaughterofarespectedsouthernclergyman,had threeavenuestotravel.Shecouldhavesoeasilyplayedtheroleof asouthernbelle, GonewiththeWind–style,gentleandsweettoher “coloredhelp,”joiningagardencluborarespectablecharitablesociety.Ifshehadintelligenceandconscienceanddidnothing,she couldhavegonecrazy,asdidhercollegefriendZeldaSayreFitzgerald.Shechosethethirdpath:togooutsidethemagiccircleand challengethesystemheadon,tobecometherebelgirl.† “TheDepressionchangeditall.Uptothistime,Ihadbeenaconformist,a southernsnob.WhatIlearnedduringtheDepressionchangedall that.IsawablindinglightlikeSaulontheroadtoDamascus.[Laughs]
*DaysofHope:RaceandDemocracyintheNewDealEra byPatriciaSullivan. UniversityofNorthCarolinaPress,1996.
†OutsidetheMagicCircle isVirginiaDurr’sautobiography(reprintedbyUniversityofAlabamaPress,1990).
ItwasthefirsttimeIhadseentheothersideofthetracks.Isaw theworldasitreallywas.”
Herhusband,CliffordDurr,hadahardtimeofit,richlydossiered bytheFBIandundersurveillanceformorethanadecade.Though describedbyWayneCoy,hiscolleagueontheFCC,as“theshadow ofagreatrockinawearyland,”hewasblacklisted.
TheycamebackhometoMontgomery.Cliff’sonce-lucrativepracticehadbecomeashambles.Nonetheless,hewasrichlyendowed withclients,mostlyblackandindigent.
OnthateveninginAugust1965,thecauseforwhichtheyhadso longcarriedthebannerhadnowalmosttwohundredthousand marchingunderitintheirhometown.Aswe,at2FelderStreet,were watchingGeorgeWallaceonTVexcoriatingthedemonstration,he wasnamingsomeoftheguestsintheroom.AmongthemwasMyles Horton.ThegovernorindicatedthatMartinLutherKingJr.had attendedHighlander,the“communistschool.”Onmorethanone occasion,Wallacehadpaidsimilaracridtributetohim,butthistime, Mylessmiledwistfully.Herememberedearliermarchesofthissort, withnomorethanaGideon’sarmytakingpart.Agoodnumberof theusualsuspects,gatheredintheroom,raisedtheirglassesashe reflected:“Weknewoneanotherbyname,byface.Oldfriends,old struggles.Today,thereweresomanythousands.Ihardlyknewanyoneoutthere.Theywerefromallover.Itwasgreat.”Poignanceand aquietjoy.Andhope.
MayIcloseonapersonalnoteintheclownishmode?Duringthe witch-huntdaysofthelate’40sandearly’50s,Iencounteredsome slightdifficulties.ThankstotheFreedomofInformationAct,Ihave seenmyFBIdossier.It’snotverythick,amerehundredandsome pages.Einstein’siseighteenhundredpages.*
Abitofbackgroundisinorder.Thepoliticalinfluencesinmylife werenottheassociationsthatmadetheattorneygeneral’ssubversives listnorcaughtthegimleteyeofthedirectoroftheFBI,thoughmy namewasassociatedwithafairnumberofthem.No,whatmost
*FredJerome, TheEinsteinFile.
affectedmeduringmyformativeyearsinhighschoolandcollege duringtheboombeforetheWallStreetcrashandtheGreatDepressionthatfollowedwasthelobbyofthemen’shotelmymother ranaftermyfatherdied.Theywereamotley,livelylot:skilled,semiskilled,andunskilledworkmen.
Therewereautodidactswho’dcalluponShakespeare,scripture, andMarkTwain,withaddedexpletives.AnumberofthemwereoldtimeWobblies,theidiomaticnamefortheIndustrialWorkersofthe World(IWW).Theywerejourneymencarpenters,boomerfiremen, andseafarers,restlessandtransientinnature.Theirdreamwasone bigunion.Their beˆtesnoires wereequallyvolubleguestswhobelieved thattheboss,themanbehindthemahoganydesk,deservedtobe there,deservedhisprivileges,becausehe’d earned them,andthatthe IWWwasanacronymfor“Iwon’twork.”
Oh,thedebates,ifyoucouldcallthemthat,werewondrousto hear(theirperorationswereseldomsottovoce).TheWobbliesreferredtotheirantagonistsasscissorbills,“capitalistswithholesin theirpockets.”
Mostoftheotherguestsdidn’tgiveahootonewayortheother. Earningtheirdailybreadweariedthemenough,though,thatI’m certaintheylookedforwardtotheentertainingnatureoftheselobby disputes,asidefromashotortwoofsourmashandSundayvisits tothegirlsinthecribsablockaway.
TherewerethreebleakyearsattheUniversityofChicagoLaw School,whereIwassingularlysilent,dreamingofClarenceDarrow andWobbliesandscissorbills,whilehearingacademicdissertations onrealproperty,corporations,andpartnership.
Toescapethefateofbecomingalawyer,Ibecameanactorin radiosoapoperas.IwasalwaystypecastasaChicagogangster. Subsequently,Ibecameadiscjockeywithaneclecticrepertoire: classical,jazz,andfolkmusic.AmongtheartistsIfavoredwasa spiritualandgospelsinger,MahaliaJackson.SheandIhadbecome friends.
Withtheadventofanewmedium,television,in1949or1950,I joinedthatworld.TV,heardfromsixintheeveningtilltenatnight, wasnotthecommercialandpoliticalforceitistoday,andthefreemarketeershadnotyettakenover.TherewereafewChicagooriginatedprogramsthatJohnCrosby,thepreeminentTVcritic,
called“TV,Chicagostyle”;theywereimprovisedinnatureandlive, ofcourse.
Oneofthemwas Studs’sPlace, withwhichIwasinvolved.There wasnoscript,merelyaplot.Thedialoguewasbythecast.Iwas considereda“hotproperty”bytheNewYorkagents.Parenthetically, mypoliticalleaningshadbecomecommonknowledgeinthetrade. TheinfluenceoftheWells-GrandHotel(thatwastheimpressive nameofmymother’splace)hadneverleftme.Ifoundmyselfattendingrallies,manysponsoredbypeopleoftheleft.
Someofthespeakerswereeloquent,someonthedreadfullydull anddoctrinaireside.Allwereimpassioned,remindingmeofthose Wells-Grandlobbyists.Iwalkedpicketlines.Isignedpetitions.I nevermetapicketlineorapetitionIdidn’tlike.Eventually,Ispoke atsomeralliesandbecametheemceeofagoodnumber.
Itwasduringthistimethatthecoldwarhadtakenoff,ashadJoe McCarthy.Mypast(andpresent)hadcaughtupwithme.
TherewereoccasionalvisitsfromtheFBI.Theyalwayscamein pairs.Alwayspolite.Mywifewascooltothem,suggestingthatthey hadnotbeeninvitedandthuswereunwelcome.I,ontheotherhand, wasalwayshospitable.Remember,Iwasaninnkeeper’sboy.Unlike theoccurrenceintheBookofLuke,therewasalwaysroomatour inn.Evenforcoupleswithoutbaggage.EvenfortheFBI.
Thevisitswerebriefanduneventful.Forsomereason,ouruninvitedguestsseemedillatease,alwaysseatedattheedgeoftheir chairs.Whetheritwasmywife’scoolnessormyoverwhelminghospitality,Idon’tknow.Afteratime,thevisitsceased,butnotmy troubles.
While Studs’sPlace wasstillridinghigh,anemissaryfromNBC headquartersinNewYorkappeared.Wesatdowninsolemnconference,he,I,andtheChicagostation’sexecutives.“We’reinbig trouble,”thevisitorsaid.Iwasmovedbyhisuseoftheroyalpronoun.“Ihavealistofpetitionsthatyouhavepresumablysigned.” Heranoffagoodnumber,adozenorso.“Isthattrue?”
“Oh,sure.”
“Didn’tyouknowthatcommunistsarebehindallthese?” Iremembermyreply.Itwasintheformofaquestion.“Suppose communistscomeoutagainstcancer.Dowehavetocomeout for cancer?”
“Thatis not veryfunny.”IwasfacingQueenVictoria.Hecontinued,suddenlyassumingthetoneofadrillsergeant.“Thesedays, you’vegottostandupandbecounted.” Istoodup.
“That’snotveryfunny,either.Sitdown!” Isatdown.
“Thereisaneasywayout,”hesuggested,ahopefulnoteinhis voice.“Allyouhavetosayisthatyouweredupedbythecommunists.Youdidn’tmeanit.Youtakeitback.Alotofpeoplehavedone that,andthey’redoingfine.”
Idemurred.NBCdecidedtheycoulddowithoutmyservices.
Iwasblacklistedforseveralyears.IshouldpointoutthatChicagoans,byandlarge,knewlittleaboutthis.Ithardlymadethelocal press.I’mcertainthathadIbeeninNewYorkorHollywood,I’d havesufferedanotherfate.Mykindoftown,Chicagois.
Duringmypersonanongratadaysinthetrade,I’dpickupafew buckslecturingatwomen’sclubsonjazz,folkmusic,andsuch.After wordgotoutthatI’dbeeninvited,eachclubwouldthenreceive, withrailroad-watchregularity,anotefromEdClamagewarningthem todesist.HewastheChicagoLegionnairewhoproclaimedhimself aone-manAmericanismcommittee.Totheireverlastingcreditand mygratitude,notoneclubcanceled.
Onechairwoman,elderlyandelegant,whosememoryIshallalwayscherish,wasoffendedbythenotefrom“thatvulgarbully.”She insistedondoublingmyfeefrom$100to$200.Naturally,Isent Clamagea$10check,explainingtohimthatitwashis10percent agent’sfeeformakingmeahundreddollarsricher.Hedidnotacknowledgethenote.Northecheck.
Onedayinthemid-fifties,CBShiredMahaliaJackson,nowinternationallycelebrated,foraweeklynetworkradioshow.SheinsistedthatIbethehost.Theyreluctantlyagreed.Ithadalive audience,aboutthreehundred,intheWrigleyBuildingCBSstudio.
Duringthethirdorfourthweekoftheseries,anotheremissary fromNewYorkappeared.HewasfromCBSheadquarters.Itwas duringadressrehearsal,anhourorsobeforetheaudiencewas letin.
HeapproachedmeonstageasIwasgoingoverthescript(what
therewasofit;wemostlyad-libbedbetweenhersongs).Hewas quitepolite.
“Wouldyoumindsigningthis?It’sproforma.”
Itwasaloyaltyoath.Idemurred.Heinsisted.Voiceswereraised. MahaliawaspassingbyonherwaytowardMildredFalls,heraccompanist.She,ofcourse,hadknownallaboutme.“Studs,”she oftensaid,“youhavesuchabigmouth,youshouldhavebeena preacher.”
Nowsheaskedme,“IsthatwhatIthinkitis,baby?”
“Yeah.”Iwasworriedabouttheaudienceimpatientlywaitingin thelobby.Itwasgettingclosetobroadcasttime.
“Areyougonnasignit?”
“Ofcoursenot.”
“Okay,let’srehearse.”
“Pardonme,MissJackson,”saidtheemissary.“Mr.Terkelhasto signit.”OrdersfromheadquartersinNewYork,heexplained.
MahaliastaredathimasthoughhewerefromMars.“Studsjust saidno.”Buthesimplydidn’tknowwhentoquit.Finally,thenowwearysingersaid,“Look,youtellMr.WhatshisnameinNewYork, iftheyfireStudstogofindanotherMahalia.”
Ourvisitordisappearedandwasneverheardfromagain.Moral: MahaliaJackson,insayingno,revealedmoreself-esteem,letalone whatourcountryisallabout,thanWilliamPaley,DavidSarnoff,and allthesponsorsandagenciesrolledintoone.Inthebeaugesteof MahaliaJackson,IsawtheradiantvisiononcemoreofCliffordand VirginiaDurr,affirmingthemselves,sayingnototheofficialword. Theymayhavealwaysbeenintheminority,butithasbeenapropheticone.
Prologue BROTHERS FatherRobertOldershawand Dr.JohnOldershaw Twotall,large-boned,bespectacledmenentertheroom.Intheir expansiveness,theyappeartooccupythewholespace:gentle giants.TheycouldeasilybepassedoffasBiblesalesmenorcandoindustrialists,exceptfortheincongruityoftheone’spriestly collar.HeisFatherRobertOldershaw,sixty-six,aCatholic priest.Theotherishisbrother,Dr.JohnOldershaw,seventy,a neurosurgeon.
Ihadintendedtointerviewonlyone,thedoctor.IwasinterestedinhisVietnamWarexperiences.Ihadheardofhis brother,thepriest,butthatwasanothermatter.Theyimmediatelysuggestedthat,sincetheyhadnotseeneachotherfora longtime,itbesomethingofareminiscentexchange,andthatI playtheroleofprompter.
ROBERT :Whatledmetobecomeapriest?[Heartylaughter ]Idon’t know.WhenIwasinfourthgradetherewasasisterinourschool whogaveuslittleholycardswithpictures.Boysgotapictureofa littleboywithJesusinthebackground;girlsgotapicturewithMary inthebackground.Earlymemories.Iwentonthroughhighschool, anditkeptnaggingatmeabit—todosomething.Iwasn’tquite surewhat,butIknewIwantedtohelppeopleinsomeway.When IwasintheseminaryIalmostgotthrownout.Thepriestaskedme whydidIwanttobecomeapriest,andIsaid,“Ithinkit’sthegrace ofGod.”Ialmostgotthrownout.
JOHN :Afteroneyearmybrotherthoughthedidn’twanttostay upthere.
ROBERT :Itwasnotthefirstyear,itwasthesecondweek.
JOHN :[Laughs ]Italkedhimintostayingwithit.
ROBERT :Iwasterriblyhomesick.Ididn’tunpackfortwoweeks. IknewIdidn’thaveavocation.IwasconvincedIshouldn’tbea priest.Johnwrotemeandsaidthatwhenhewentonaretreatthere wasapriestwhotoldhim,“Ifyoudon’thaveavocation,youcan makeavocationifyou’redetermined.”Ididn’tthinktherewasa futureforme,buthereIam.
Myfatherwasaconvert;heusedtosinginSt.David’sEpiscopal ChoirinBaltimore.Hewasexcommunicatedbythepastorwhenhe hitthetrailforBillySunday.*ThenhecameheretoEvanston.
There’sSt.Mary’sCatholicChurch,there’sSt.Mark’sEpiscopal, justtwoblocksapart.MymotherandfatherwenttoSt.Mark’sby mistakethefirsttime.Afterthefirsttenminutes,heturnstoher andsays,“Gertrude,we’reinthewrongplace,Icanunderstandtoo much.”EverythingintheCatholicChurchwasinLatin.
JOHN :WhenIwasinhighschool,IwantedtogetintotheU.S. NavalAcademy.Iguessthatwasbecausemyparentshadpeoplein thenavy.Theproblemwas,myvisionwasn’tgoodenough.Asmy secondchoice,IendedupgettingintomedicalschoolatLoyola. FromthereIdidfinallygointhenavy,asaninternattheBethesda NavalHospital.Ibecameaflightsurgeon.
IservedinVietnamforabitmorethanayear.InWashington, D.C.,theyhavetheVietnamwall[VietnamVeteransMemorial]. That’snotasimportanttomeasthestatueoftheHispanic,the Anglo,andtheAfricanAmerican,youngmenthatweremaybe twentyyearsold.† Thesewerethecreamofthecrop,thegoodboys, theboysItookcareofoverseas.Theyweretheonesthatvolunteered.AndIwasoperatingonthem.Someofthemdied.Iwasable tohelpalotmore,Ibelieve.Itwasaprivilegetobeabletodothat, thehighlightofmymilitarytime.
Now,abouttheeffectsofwar.I’mputinmindofitsfutilityas describedbyEricBogle,asingerfromAustraliawhowrote“And theBandPlayedWaltzingMatilda.”It’saboutGallipoli.Ifyoureally *Apopularevangelistearlyinthetwentiethcentury.Hewasaformer baseballplayerwhowasvirulentlyanti-laborandpro–bigbusiness;quite colorful.
†ThreeServicemen isarealisticstatuebyFrederickHartnearMayaLin’sabstractwarmemorial.
listentothatsong,ittellsyouabouttheterribledamagethat’sdone topeople.IntheVietnamsituation,thereweresomanyyoungmen whoselivesweredestroyed,crippled,andmaimed,andmanythat died.Evennow,we’retalkingaboutgoingtowarwithIraq.Mostof thesepeoplehaven’tlostabrotherorafather,orgonetovisitthe veteranshospitalsandseentheterriblephysicalandmentaldamage donebythesethings.Unfortunately,Ithinkthatmankindlooksat warassomekindofagloriousendeavor.Ifyou’reworkingwiththe peopledamagedbyit,it’snotsoglorious.
ROBERT :Ihavearealproblemwiththemoralityofwar.Anykind ofwar.AweekagoArchbishopKassab,whoisbishopofBasra,in southernIraq,preachedatourchurch.Hetoldabouttheterrible hardshipandthelossoflife,theillnesses,alloftheterribleexperiencesthatthey’rehavingbecauseofthesanctionsourcountryhas imposedonthem.Hetoldstoriesofsomechildrenwhocameto himbeforeheleft.Theysaid,“Bishop,pleaseaskthepeoplenotto bombus.”Thesearekidsandthey’remalnourished.Ifyouwant hope,there’shope.HopeisthatmannamedArchbishopKassab. He’stheguywho’stakeneverything.He’scalledtheSt.Nicholasof Iraqbecauseofhiscareforthepoorandforthekidsandtheelderly. Idon’tknowhowhedoesitwithwhathehas.*
JOHN :Partofthetraining,partofthepropagandathat’sperpetuatedinourmilitary,theirpolicy,andmaybeit’sevennecessaryinorder tohavethemfighttokill,isthattheenemy,peoplelikeVietnameseor anyoftheotherracesorgroups,liketheIraqis,aresubhuman.They don’tputanyvalueonlife.IrememberhearingthatabouttheChinese. Butonceyougettoknowthesepeople,yourealizethattheyputjustas muchvalueonlifeandfamilyaswehereintheUnitedStates,ifnot moreso.Inmanyofthesecountries,theirfamilycohesivenessismuch better.Wemustrealizethatallthesedifferentcountries,thesepeople, theirparents,theirchildren,theirbrothers,theirsisters,havevalueto oneanother,toeachother.Wardisruptsthat.
I’vebeentoldthatintheGulfWarwelostonlytwohundredand someofourpeople,andmostofthosewerebytrainingaccidents. Butthebombingandthefirebombingthatwasdone,therewere
*ThisconversationoccurredseveralmonthsbeforePresidentBushordered thepreemptivestrikes.
estimatesfromtenthousandIraqisuptoahundredthousandkilled. Whenyougettoknow,whichI’vedone,peoplewhoareVietnamese whowereontheotherside,yougettoknowtheirvalues.Theyare importanttotheirfamilies,importanttotheirlovedones,andthey’re nodifferentthanweare.
FatherOldershaw,yourbrothersawthehumanityofpeopleontheothersideof war.ImetyouthroughSteveandMaurineYoung,wholosttheirsonbecause hewasshotbyaMexicankid,MarioRamos,whothoughtAndrewYoungwas amemberofarivalgang,seatedinacar,atastoplight.*Mariohadthrowna signalthatAndrewignored;hehadn’ttheslightestideawhatitmeant.Youwere thepastorintheparishofMarioandhisfamily.John’sexperiencewasinthe VietnamWar,yourswasinadomesticwar.
ROBERT :Right,itis,quoteunquote,war.TheboyMarioRamos wasanaltarserverinaparishthatmergedwithours.Heusedto servemass.Irememberhimthere.Hewas,likealotofteenagekids, attheedgesofthechurch,onefootoutsidethedoor.Thedaybefore thishappened,hewasthereatthedoor.IsawMario.Hewasa memberofagang,theLatinKings.Nextday,Ihearthatthisshootinghadtakenplace.Ididn’tknowSteveandMaurineYoungatthe time.Theywerenotpartofourparish,buttheywerepartofthe community.Marioshottheirsonandkilledhim.Itwasadrive-by shooting.Myfirstreactionwas:lockhimup,throwthekeysaway.I findoutaweeklaterthatthisisMarioRamos,thisismyMario,this isthekidfrommyparish.SoIwenttohisparents,firstofall,and spentsometimewiththem.ThenIwenttotheprisontovisithim. Ijusthadthis why questionofhim.Hewasfeelingverysorryfor himselfatthatpoint.Atfirst,Ireallydidnotknowwhattodo,but IknewIhadtodosomething.SoIjustpuntedandIwenttothe community,tothechurch,tothepeopleatSundayservices,andI said,“Ourboy,oneofourkids,shotandkilledanotherboyinthe neighborhood.MarioRamoshaskilledAndrewYoung.”Isaid,“I wanttoaskyoualltoprayforMarioandhisfamily,forAndrew Youngandhisfamily.”Sothepeopledid.Ipreachedonitthevery Sundayaftertheshooting.Threeorfourweekslater,Imadecontact
*SteveandMaurineYoungappearin WilltheCircleBeUnbroken? (TheNew Press,2001).
withtheYoungs.Iactuallydroveupwithsomeonewhoofferedto introducemetoMrs.Young.Itwasfrosty.Itwasatensemoment, butshealsoknewthatIhadaskedthepeopleoftheparishtopray forthem.AtthatmomentIjustsaid,“I’mhere.AnythingIcando tobehelpful?”Igavethemmytelephonenumber.Itwaswithina coupleofdaysthatIheardfromSteve.Wetalkedforquiteawhile onthephone.Heasked,“Whywouldhedothat?Andwheredid hegetthegun?”Andthenhecameoverafewdayslaterandwe talkedwayintothenight.Thatwasthebeginning.
Thereweretwolettersthatcrossedinthemailayearafterthis happened.OnewasMario’slettersaying: Pleaseforgiveme,I’msorry. AndtheotherwasMaurine’sletterthatsaid: Idon’tknowifyou’reable toaskforgiveness,soI’mgoingtotakethefirststep.Iforgiveyou. Thatled tomorecorrespondence.EventuallyMaurinesaid,“Iwanttomeet Mario.”SoItookherouttoJolietPenitentiary.Shewalksin,the veryfirstthingshedid,shetakeshishandsandsays,“Iwantyouto knowthatIamgladtobehere.Youcameintomylifethroughan actofviolence,butIseeyounowaspartofmyfamily.Soaspart ofthefamily,youhavearesponsibilitytoholdthisfamilyinprayer. Todowhatyoucantohelpusrecover.Becauseyou’vetornthe familyapart.”
John,youweresayingthatinthemilitarytheyteachpeopleto fighttokill.Ourcourtsystem,theprosecutorsaretaughttofightto killtogetaconviction,andifpossiblethedeathpenalty.Because thesepeople—justasyousaid—they’resubhuman.MarioRamosdid aviolentthing,butMarioRamosisachildofGod,andhehasa humanface.I’vemetotherpeoplewhoareinmatesandyouseethe samething:there’shumanitythere.Yetwedemonizeeveryone.
Howdidyoutwogetthisway?
ROBERT :ItmusthavebeentheJesuiteducation.[Laughs ]
JOHN :Bobsaysthatjokingly,butI’mnotsurehe’swrong.The Jesuitsteachyoutothink,tolearn,toevaluate,tofindoutwhatis realityandhowtodealwithit.I’vealwayslookedupontheJesuit ethicasbeingkindofspecial.IwentintomedicinebecauseIwanted todosomethinguseful.Iwantedtobeofsomevalue.Iwasn’t interestedinbecomingrichandfamous.Mybiggestsatisfactionover theyearshasbeentakingcareofpeople.IsawafellowintheVA
inNewMexicowhohadbeeninjuredwithshrapnelbackin1943 ontheAnziobeachheadnearRome.He’dhadlegpaineversince.I operatedonhimabouttwoyearsago.Hiswifesaysit’smiraculous: hispainisgoneafterfiftyyears.Ican’ttakecreditforthat.Thepoint isbybeingapartofthat,Ifeelagreatdealofsatisfaction.Thewar situationisdiametricallyopposedtothat.Youseethedestructionof youngmen’slives.It’susuallytheyoungestandthebest,thefinest ofourpopulation.Andit’sprobably—
ROBERT :Thepoorest.
JOHN :ThesamethingwiththeVietnamese,theonesthatI’ve hadalotofcontactwithandthatIwasmostintimatelyinvolved with.ItookcareofVietnamesewhenIwasinVietnam.IwaschagrinedtofindwhenIinquiredaftertheirwelfarethatmanyofthe peoplesaidourgovernmentkilledthem.ThisisafterI’dspenta gooddealoftime,nottryingtosavethemforinterrogationbutto savetheirlives.
ROBERT :WhenyouwerechiefofneurosurgeryatCountyHospital,Iaskedyou,“Whydoyoustaytherewhenyoucouldgosomewhereelseandmakealotmoremoneyinprivatepractice?”You toldme,“Someone’sgottoteachtheseyoungdoctorscompassion.” Idon’tknowifyourememberthat.
JOHN :Idon’tgiveuphope.SometimesI’mjusttoodamnedstubborn.Throughthecourseofyears,I’vealwayshadthissensethat thingsweregoingtogetbetter.I’vehadanabidingfaith.Idoalot ofpraying.I’vespentsometimeinmonasteries.Ithinkthatbackgroundhasledmetokeeptrying.
ROBERT :IrememberwhenIbecamepastorinEvanstonfourteen yearsago,Ididn’trealizethatIwasheadingintoamajordepression, aclinicaldepression.Isaidtomyself, Ishouldn’tbepastorhere,orbe hereatall. Fortunately,Ihadalifeguardwhohelpedme—thisguy, mybrother.Itwasaverydarktimeinmylife.
JOHN :OneoftheworstexperiencesIhadwaswhenmymarriage wascomingapart.TherehavebeenothertimeswhenIfeltreally downinthedepths,asenseofhopelessness.Ihavetosaythatthis fellowsittingtomyleft,he’ssavedmyassmanytimes.Talkabout hope.Heembodieshopeforme.Hehelpsmeevennow,working outproblemswithmysixadultchildren.Ihavegreathopesforthem. Mybrother,he’sprobablybeentheprincipalhopeinmylife.
ROBERT :That’spaybackforthetimethathekeptmeintheseminary.Ifnotforhim,Iwouldn’tbehere.Wedriftedapartforawhile, butoverthelastseveralyears,we’vebeenclose.
I’manorthodoxcoward.Johnisthecompetitor.Hewasagreat swimmer,andhe’dgetreallytickedoffifhedidn’twintherace.I didn’tgiveadamn.IcameinfifthintheCatholicLeaguefifty-yard freestyleonce.Igotayellowribbon.Idon’tknowwhereitis;Iwish Istillhadit.Thatwasabigachievementforme.Ijustcouldnot pushmyselfthewayhepushedhimself.Ireallyneedpeopleto pushme.
JOHN :IthinkformeI’vechangedfrombeingatechnicianin medicinetounderstandingpeople.Ineverhadmuchtodowith feelings.Astimehaswornon,I’vebeguntolistentopeople.I’m notverygoodatit,butI’mdoingbetter.
ROBERT :Now,isn’tthathope?Ifyouhaveapersonwhostands atyourside...
Whatareyourhopesnow,orfears,ordoubts?
ROBERT :“Hopeisathingwithfeathers”... EmilyDickinson. HopeisthepeopleIseebyday:parentsreallystrugglingtogettheir kidsraisedandthroughschool,whotakeontwoorthreejobstodo that.Hopeispeopleofmyparishgoingthroughterminalillnesses butstayingaboveit,notlettingitdominatethem.Hopeisthepeople whoministertothem.Hopeisagroupintheparishthatcameout oftherecentscandalonsexualabusebyclergy,peoplewhoarereally tryingtomakesomethingpositiveoutofthisandwhoarereally compassionatetothosewhohavebeenhurt,boththevictimsand thevictimizers.Hopeispeopleworkinginthepeacemovementto keepusoutofwarinIraqorworkingtoprovideaffordablehousing. Hopehasahumanface.SureI’mworried,butaslongaswehave peoplewhoarespeakingoutloudandclear,andholdingourleaders accountable,I’mhopeful.Hopedieslast.
JOHN :Myideasofhopeatthispointrevolvearoundtheyoung menandwomenthatItrain:theexampleIcansetforthem,howI canshowthemwhatisimportantintakingcareofpatients,notjust themechanics,butthewholeperson.Itsoundshackneyed,butthat tomeiswhathopeisabout.
ROBERT :HopeisMaurineandSteveYoung.HopeisMarioRa-
mos,who’sturnedhislifearoundinprison.Hopeisawomannamed ArleneBoesak.She’samemberoftheparishwhoreadacolumnI wroteinthebulletinaskingpeopletowritetoMarioRamos.She startedwritingtohim,andthenshestartedvisitinghiminJoliet. HopeisaguynamedPaulJoseph,whowouldtakepublictransportationeveryweekfromEvanstonouttotheCookCountyjailtovisit forhalfanhourwithMario.Fivehoursround-trip.That’swhatI mean.It’speoplelikethat.Who’severgoingtoknowaboutPaul JosephorArleneBoesak?
CanItellyouaboutonemorepersoninmyparish?Hisnameis David.Hehascerebralpalsy.Hehastwosisters.Imarriedtheparentsandbaptizedthosetripletssixteenyearsago,andtheywereall premature.They’veallbeenaffectedtodifferentdegreeswithCP. Davidcannotwalk.Hecan’tstand.Hehadtogointosurgeryin February,very,verypainful.Iusedtocallhimeverynightandwe wouldpraytogether.He’sanincrediblekidwhojustabsolutelywill notgiveup.Hesaid,“Iwouldmuchratherplaybasketballthan watchit.ButifwatchitiswhatIdo,watchitiswhatIdo.”Sixteen yearsold.Unbelievable.
JOHN :Touseanauticalterm,anavyterm,staythecourse.
