Eucharistic Colloqies

MOTHER MARIA CANDIDA OF THE EUCHARIST Discalced Carmelite (1884-1949)

Eucharistic Colloquies

EDIZIONI FEERIA – EDIZIONI OCD

ÂŤIl granello di senapaÂť

n. 33

Mother Maria Candida of the Eucharist Discalced Carmelite (1884-1949)

Eucharistic Colloquies Edited by Carmelo Mezzasalma and Alessandro Andreini Preface by JesĂşs Castellano Cervera Translated by Chiara Calabrese

Edizioni Feeria – Edizioni OCD

© EDIZIONI FEERIA – EDIZIONI OCD 2012 Via S. Leolino 1 – 50022 Panzano in Chianti (Firenze) – Italy Tel. and fax +39 055 852041 – e-mail info@sanleolino.org Graphic design Comunità di San Leolino – Panzano in Chianti (Firenze)

Contents

Preface by Jesús Castellano Cervera ocd Introduction Translator’s note Chronology Selected Bibliography

I. A vocation for the Eucharist II. The Eucharist and faith III. The Eucharist and hope IV. The Eucharist and charity V. The Eucharist as communion with God VI. The Eucharist and reparation VII. The Eucharist and immolation VIII. The Eucharist and the religious vows IX. The Eucharist and love for one’s neighbour X. The Eucharist and Mary Consecration to Jesus Eucharist

7 15 75 79 89

97 107 115 123 133 143 153 163 181 191 203

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Preface

During the Great Jubilee of 2000 and in accordance with John Paul II’s wish, the whole Church experienced “an intensely Eucharistic year”, a year of thanksgiving to the Father for two millennia of the Son’s presence amongst us, starting with the mystery of the Incarnation. A Jubilee which has renewed our wonder in a presence which has always existed in the Church in the mystery of the Eucharist. “In the Sacrament of the Eucharist, the Saviour who became flesh in Mary’s womb twenty centuries ago, continues to offer himself to mankind as a source of divine life” (TMA no. 55). For this reason, the Eucharistic mystery has again become the centre of faith and life for believers. This was solemnly confirmed on 17 April 2003 with the promulgation of John Paul II’s new encyclical, Ecclesia de Eucharistia, which is entirely dedicated to the Eucharistic mystery.

For twenty centuries, Christ has been a friendly, close presence, for us and with us, in the sacrament of the Eucharist. His company has made this earth, still a land of exile for a people travelling towards their homeland, into a world brightened by the light of the Eucharist and warmed by the incarnated charity of Christ present in the Tabernacle, not just in one place, but everywhere, with the very same power 7

through which God himself makes his presence felt wherever his children are.

For this reason, a book on the Eucharist is always an important contribution to the work of awakening to faith and love, especially if it is a book born out of contemplation, a book by a daughter of St Teresa of Jesus, who had a long, deep mystic experience of the Eucharist.

Teresa of Avila, enamoured of Christ’s humanity, used to talk about him, about his presence and closeness, as of one who has become “our friend in the Most Holy Sacrament” (cf. Life 22.6), using a friendly, intimate tone, and showing her happiness in a presence which fulfilled her burning desire to see God and compensated for her regret that she had not lived as a contemporary of Christ at the time when he lived in the flesh amongst us. And this was at a time when she, herself, as a spouse with an afflicted soul, felt the devastating effects of the Protestant Reformation which emptied the Tabernacles and she therefore, like the Church, felt wounded at heart, knowing of the profanations carried out against the Most Holy Sacrament.

This is the reason why, when dealing with the Paternoster, she commented on the words referring to our daily bread and their Eucharistic meaning, with a wise theological and spiritual exegesis and a fervent, almost priestly prayer, thereby giving a typically Eucharistic imprint to the vocation for the Teresian Carmelite life (The Way of Perfection, chapters 33-35).

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Mother Maria Candida of the Eucharist was a daughter of St Teresa. She lived in the 20th century, a Eucharistic soul of our time, and came with her charismatic testimony to enlighten the eyes of faith and warm the heart of believers in the fading millennium with her meditations on the Eucharistic mystery.

In this new, carefully edited edition, we can once again read what she wrote on the Eucharist in the Holy Year of Redemption of 1933.

In 1933, the Holy Year of Redemption was celebrated all over the world in memory of the death of the Saviour. The year 2000 celebrated the great Jubilee of His birth. The work presented here is wonderfully in line with these two important celebrations. A work born from piety, a gift of the Spirit and the Eucharistic charisma, which is itself a gift and precious fruit of the Holy Spirit donated to the Church, written by Mother Maria Candida of the Eucharist, Discalced Carmelite from Ragusa.

At the end of the 20th century and the beginning of the new millennium, there is an impelling need to pick all the owers which, thanks to the Holy Spirit, have silently bloomed at the heart of the Church in this time of grace. This is in order to allow all God’s people, enlightened by the wisdom of the saints, to rejoice in the deep feelings which our brothers and sisters have been able to inspire through the grace of the Holy Spirit.

It is precisely with these feelings that we must approach the meditations of Mother Maria Candida of the Eucharist. Her name, as she used to say, is 9

already an evocative synthesis of the mystery of the Eucharist.

These are deeply intense nuptial meditations, in accordance with the life of a Carmelite who found in her vocation to the Teresian Carmelite life, as spouse of Christ, the full accomplishment of a Eucharistic ideal which started in her childhood and became the centre of her existence. A Eucharist which is presence, love, constant company and eternal immolation.

A Eucharist characterized by Jesus abiding in the sacrament with a permanent presence which is open to the love of the Father and the brothers, and capable of transforming, as it did, the life of Mother Candida. Hers was a kind of existence permanently characterized by her love towards God, the sisters in her convent, and towards humanity, near and far and surrounding her, whom she embraced through contemplation and intercession.

It is a mystery through which she becomes a presence in the Present. A real love relationship which becomes a nuptial union in which the Carmelite from Ragusa lives as if at the centre of the world, being concentrated on Him who, in the Eucharist, is the very heart of mankind and the cosmos.

With the intensity of a living faith and a very deep experience of charity, Mother Maria Candida opens the way for us to as many paths converging in the Eucharist as the meditations that she offers. These are like sunrays springing from the Eucharist and directed to the heart of the Carmelite, from which they converge again on the Most Holy Sacrament, with the unmistak10

able mark of her human personality, feminine sensitivity and contemplative Carmelite vocation.

We could call them theological meditations, despite there is a prevailing theology of the heart characterized by strong piety, poetry and live experience, expressed in the devotional language typical of the time. These meditations praise the never-ending mystery of the Eucharist.

Ten meditations, ten diverging and then converging sunrays, a true Eucharistic Decalogue imbued with contemplation and life, offered to us with the simplicity of a testimony, even though these ten intense Eucharistic meditations are elevated to real contemplations by the tone of prayer, and also of a colloquy with Christ Spouse of the Eucharist.

These are like the ten strings of a psaltery playing a newly composed Eucharistic symphony together. The overture is the significance of her Eucharistic vocation, which then develops with some thoughts on the Eucharistic mystery, seen through the three theological virtues of faith, hope and charity, so dear to the Carmelite tradition, which later find their synthesis in the theme of communion with God. After this initial symphonic movement, Mother Candida goes deep into the matter, with an élan and feelings which are typical of her Eucharistic vocation, and deals with important, delicate theological themes such as reparation and immolation.

The Eucharistic symphony continues with a number of specific comments on the Eucharist which throw light on religious life and the three Vows of 11

chastity, poverty and obedience. A life which, in terms of Eucharistic sacrifice, can be summed up as love for one’s neighbour.

The final note of the symphony, quite rightly, is a Marian one: Mary and the Eucharist. With the delicacy of an exquisitely feminine and Marian heart, Mother Candida makes us appreciate the Marian meaning of the Eucharist, a mystery which has its origin in the Virgin Mary, as Corpus natum ex Maria Virgine, a mystery which requires the Mother’s purity in order to be received and adored.

This is basically the content and style, the value and testimony of this book, written with love, true piety and some sparks of authentic “mystic Eucharistic charity”, inspired by the Holy Spirit.

Among those things which struck me most in terms of originality, I would like to mention two or three pages in Mother Maria Candida’s manuscript.

It is certainly worth remembering the page which recalls her Eucharistic vocation, to be found in her first meditation. These are short and intense pages which go beyond a simple comment on the Eucharist, though elevated and wise, to become the story of the grace she received on Corpus Christi Day in 1933, which made Mother Maria Candida aware of her entirely Eucharistic vocation. It was the day which revealed her vocation to the Church.

The fifth meditation, on The Eucharist as Communion with God, opens with an enchanting memory foreshadowing her future vocation which had already been inscribed in her heart in childhood. “When I 12

was still a child, before I was old enough to receive Jesus in Communion, I would rush to the front door to greet my mother when she returned from Holy Mass. Then on tiptoe I would reach up to her and cry, ‘I want the Lord too!’ My mother would bend down and softly breathe on my lips. I would immediately leave her, and placing my hands across my chest, full of joy and faith and jumping for joy, I would repeat, ‘I have received the Lord too! I have received the Lord too!’” (p. 133). This is a clear indication of a vocation which is a call from God, a generous and personal initiative which is a gift to the Church.

There is another beautiful, simple page in which, in an original way, our Carmelite from Ragusa explains the Eucharist through the symbol of salt. It is to be found in the third meditation. “One morning, while the community was receiving Jesus Eucharist, a sweet thought, full of tenderness, softly and naturally came into my mind! It seemed to me that the most cherished Body that the priest was placing on the lips of my sisters was like a most precious salt he was putting inside us to prevent corruption and preserve us intact, or even beautify us!” (p. 119).

I must admit that, in my readings on the Eucharist, I have never found such a precise and striking use of the symbolism of precious salt. The Eucharist gives us a taste of the eternal life, thanks to it our existence is not tasteless but rather, it tastes of God, heavenly bread, who preserves us, our mind, heart and body from corruption. The Eucharist is a precious, divine salt which safeguards the seed of incorruptibility within our corruptible body. Mother Can13

dida gives the symbol an ascetic, mystic meaning, but the symbol in itself, within the dynamic context of Eucharistic communion, when we receive the bread of immortality, acquires a strong and highly evocative meaning.

The pages of the ninth meditation on The Eucharist and Love for One’s Neighbour, are also highly prophetic and precious. Here Mother Maria Candida’s delicacy discovers the treasures and exquisite needs of Christian charity of which the Eucharist is the model, source and fundamental need in the life of the faithful.

Everything in this book is beautiful because of its openness, nobility and fervour. Everything is permeated by its strong significance in terms of faith and sanctity. Everything has the imprint of a soul moulded by the Holy Spirit as a Eucharistic soul in the Church and for the Church.

JESÚS CASTELLANO CERVERA OCD

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ability to accustom themselves to violence and deceit.

This different but real history, was outlined at the beginning of the Christian era by, amongst others, Peter and Paul who stopped there while travelling towards Rome; by the early saintliness of Agatha and Lucy; and, in our own time, by the apostles of charity who include the Blessed Giacomo Cusmano, the Blessed Annibale Maria of France and the Blessed Maria Schininà plus the strong personality of Giorgio La Pira, mayor of Firenze and originally from Pozzallo in the Ragusa province. It is to this history that John Paul II referred in his unforgettable journey to Agrigento and in his paternal cry repeated in front of the solemn remains in the Valley of the Temples.

Obviously we cannot expect canonical observers of culture and sociology to have already embraced the spiritual turning point marked by the prophetic words of the Holy Father as regards the “traditional” image of Sicily. Nevertheless, we are bound to refer to it if we want to understand the significance of Mother Maria Candida of the Eucharist’s human and spiritual adventure, which we intend to restore to general attention through the critical edition of her extraordinary manuscript on the Eucharist.

2. Biographical synopsis Maria Barba, as Mother Maria Candida was called before entering Carmel, was born on 6 January 1884 in Catanzaro, the city where her family, originally from Palermo, was temporarily residing because of 21

her father’s job, Pietro Barba (1833-1904), a Councillor at the Court of Appeal. Her mother, Giovanna Florena (1848-1914), belonged to a noble family from Santo Stefano di Camastra, near Messina.10 Lively and passionate, though gifted with an extraordinary interior sensibility, Maria attended elementary school and started teacher training school. Nevertheless, at the age of fourteen, according to the questionable habit of the time, she was forced by her parents to leave school. She was only allowed, for a period of time, to play the piano, as was customary for young women destined to lead a socially active life. The discovery of music in some way completed an education which, as intended by her family, had to conform to a certain standard of normality. Maria showed great talent for the piano, and her teachers suggested that she should attend the Conservatory in Palermo. Once again her family objected as they believed that a young woman attending school would be exposed to various dangers. Notwithstanding this, they truly loved her, and Maria herself, in her autobiographical writings, hints at a serene family life pervaded by strong Christian spirituality. These autobiographical manuscripts were written by Maria when she was twenty-six, and they also demonstrate how Maria was always willing to 10 Apart from Maria, Giovanna and Pietro Barba had eleven other children, five of whom did not survive the first months of life.

The others were Luisa (1870-1943), Stefano (1874-1949), cardiologist, professor at the University of Palermo, Cristoforo (1876-1929), Councillor at the Court of Appeal, Giuseppina (1880-1944), Antonietta (1887-1968) and Paolo Francesco (1890-1911), law student. As we will see, Stefano and Cristoforo, the eldest brothers, were the strongest opponents to Maria’s religious vocation.

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consider the positive aspects of people and events.

Led by a pure affection for her family, therefore, Maria conformed for a period of time to the contemporary model of young woman.

She was a light-hearted and lively fifteen-year-old girl (1899) when the attraction towards God brought a sudden change in her, in some way mysterious even to us, leading to a clear “conversion” in her soul, deeper and deeper, with no return. Although isolated in this transformation which took place within her, and perhaps misunderstood within her own family, God became her guide especially as regards her attraction towards the mystery of the Eucharist which would become the spiritual centre for the rest of her life. While still a student at the Collegio di Maria in Palermo called the “Giusino”,11 at that time run by fervent nuns, Maria came to know the life of St Margaret Mary Alacoque, a religious of the Visitation at Paray-le-Monial who received the revelation of the Sacred Heart of Jesus. She was so struck by this that she initially thought of joining the Visitation Order founded by St Francis of Sales and St Françoise de Chantal. From St Margaret Mary’s autobiography she also acquired the awareness that Jesus Christ is preserved within the Tabernacles. At that time Maria Barba was just eighteen. This, and many more ele11

The Collegio di Maria “Giusino” still exists and includes an elementary and a high school. Located near Palermo Cathedral, the college was founded by Donna Giuseppa Tetamo Giusino in 1787, with the intention of helping the poor. The nuns conform to the Constitutions of Cardinal Pietro Marcellino Corradini which can be summed up as “prayer and teaching”.

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ments, reveals the deep internal conflict experienced

by Maria Barba in her adolescence. The conversion opened the way to a completely unknown world towards which her soul was strongly attracted, even though the direction of such research was still not entirely clear to her. On the other hand, in those days, Christian education in Sicilian families did not go beyond the practice of the Sacraments, saying the rosary and general obedience to the precepts of the Church. This was obviously a consequence of the clear-cut separation between clergy and lay people, according to which deep knowledge of religious matters was solely the prerogative of the clergy. During these years, Maria also got to know about St Gemma Galgani, the mystic in Lucca who had received the stigmata and would become a fundamental point of reference in her spiritual life and later in the Carmel.

Reading The Imitation of Christ, which she discovered through the novice mistress in the Visitation Order in Palermo, in 1902, directed her towards a more ascetic dimension of Christian life. It is well known that The Imitation of Christ has been a popular book of Christian spirituality (certainly the most read after the Gospels) in monasteries for meditation, in religious and priestly life and as a manual of thorough Christian education for many generations of lay people all over the world. St Thérèse of Lisieux grew through this work which still contains a spiritual tension based on the human journey along the path traced by the historical Jesus, the master, the servant who embraces his passion and death in obedience to the Father (cf. Enzo Bianchi). More 24

specifically, Mother Maria Candida would find a wonderful way to personalize the Holy Communion in Book IV of The Imitation, which deals with the great importance of the sacrament of the Eucharist in the life of a Christian.

Especially after the death of her father (1904), Maria’s family followed her transformation with apprehension and from that time, above all when they discovered her religious vocation, they did all they could to restrain her fervour, secretly convinced that it was just a temporary exaltation. After all, Maria was a woman, and for her brothers, who had gone into the law like their father, her attitude of deep meditation and search in prayer was, to say the least, exaggerated. Initially, Maria had to adapt to the family situation showing a charitable spirit no less surprising than her firmness. Her family had in fact gone through death and misfortune, with the long, painful illness of her father, the death of her brother Paolo (1911) when still a university student, and the poor health of her mother, which had left a deep mark on her. Lacking a spiritual guide who could adequately lead her in her Christian experience, Maria for a period of time suffered from the condition called “scruples” (also well-known to St Thérèse of Lisieux) and thought that mortification of the senses was the soundest method to attain an authentic spiritual life.

Eventually she became seriously ill (1905), but in her heart she knew that she would not die before becoming a nun. She therefore asked her confessor if she could take the vow of virginity but was forbidden to do so and was only allowed to make an act of con25

secration. From that moment on, Maria understood that she needed a true spiritual guide whom she luckily found in Father Antonio Matera of the Palermo Conventuals. Amid various problems and difficulties, God comforted and helped her through special signs. Firstly, she had the opportunity to read The Story of a Soul by St Thérèse of Lisieux which, a few years later, would inspire her Carmelite vocation, and then, in May 1905, she heard the voice of Jesus calling her to the Tabernacle for the first time. Finally she was given permission by her spiritual guide to take Communion daily, a decision which was immediately criticized by her family.

Disputes within the family increased every day, probably because there was still the idea that Maria should find a good match. We should not forget that her mother’s brother, Filippo Florena, was a senator of the Kingdom of Italy. They even said hard words to her such as “mad, possessed woman, liar, hypocrite”. These were very painful years for Maria Barba, still trying to realize her vocation, yet comforted by the constant presence of God. One day she heard an interior voice from the Virgin Mary who told her, “Daughter, Jesus does not simply want you among the saints, He also wants you among the martyrs.”

In 1910, she went to Rome and was received with her family by Pope Pius X, the Pope who had allowed her daily Communion and who left Maria with an unforgettable memory. During her stay in Rome, apart from seeing its beauties, she visited the Institute of the Sisters of Mary Reparatrix, founded by the Blessed Mary of Jesus (Emile d’Oultremont, 26

1818-1878), whose biography Mother Maria Candida had read a few years earlier. The Mary of Jesus’ Institute was particularly devoted to the adoration of the Most Holy Sacrament and this was such a powerful attraction for Maria that she thought of entering it. A few years later she even tried to run away from Palermo to be received into the Roman Institute. On her return to Palermo, she obtained permission from Father Matera to take a vow of virginity. In 1914 her mother died and, on the outbreak of the First World War, Maria renewed her vow of victim to the love of Jesus, already taken a few years before, following the example of Margaret Mary Alacoque. Facing the tragedy of war, Maria felt she had “a heart as big as the entire world”.

At the age of thirty-five (1919), she finally understood that she could not wait any longer to realize her vocation. Determined to become a Discalced Carmelite she asked the Servant of God Cardinal Alessandro Lualdi, Archbishop of Palermo, for advice and he advised her to stop delaying because of her family. He also advised her not to enter the Palermo Convent of Discalced Carmelites, as it was going through a difficult period which, in a few years time, would eventually bring about its closure, but the one in Ragusa which was new and very poor. On 25 September 1919, after the painful departure from her family (her brothers refused to say goodbye and inexplicably never spoke to her again), Maria entered the Ragusa Carmel. The day before she entered it, some nuns saw a white dove wandering in the novices’ quarters and then flying into the cloister.

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Getting used to the Carmelite lifestyle was not easy for Maria who, after all, was accustomed to the comfortable life of the upper middle class. In addition, the Ragusa Carmel was really very poor and located in a rather uncomfortable building. In fact, a few years later, according to the design of Providence, Mother Maria Candida built the new convent which is still located in Via Marsala. Nevertheless, the nuns always remembered the unfading smile and kind disposition of the young postulant who did her best to be helpful in this difficult situation. On 16 April 1920, Maria Barba donned the Carmelite habit and received her new name, Sister Maria Candida of the Eucharist. On that occasion she wrote to her friend Agatina Callari, “If only you could enjoy one day of religious life! I cannot express how it is! What peace and happiness it brings!”12 On 17 April 1921, Sister Maria Candida made her simple profession and three years later she made her solemn profession on 13 April 1924, St George’s Day, patron saint of Ragusa Ibla. The date had been chosen to pay homage to the convent’s confessor, Father Giorgio la Perla (18741953) who, apart from being a noble figure within the Ragusa clergy, deeply felt “more Carmelite than the Carmelites”. This priest had had a primary role in the foundation of the Ragusa Carmel and when he met Sister Maria Candida he became her spiritual director for the rest of her life. Don Giorgio la Perla’s discernment and deep piety were such that Mother 12 Letter of 31 March 1920, in Scritti della Serva di Dio madre Maria Candida dell’Eucaristia. Vol. VIII Lettere dirette a Sacerdoti e secolari, Documents typed for the Ordinary Beatification Trial, pp. 76-78.

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Maria Candida relied on his advice and judgement when she became prioress of the convent.13 In the meantime, Pope Pius XI proceeded with the beatification of Thérèse of Lisieux on 29 April 1923. On that occasion, Sister Maria Candida wrote the text of a talk entitled Teresa, nostro modello e nostra via (Thérèse, our model and path) which was read to the entire community. Sister Maria Candida’s happiness on account of this beatification was immense.

She wrote again to her friend Agatina, referring to the saint of Lisieux, “I owe her (as well as to St Teresa) my choice of Carmel and I have chosen her as protectress for my solemn Profession.”14 Six months after her solemn profession, on 10 November 1924, Sister Maria Candida of the Eucharist was elected prioress of her convent for the first time. This was a great burden but she accepted it as a sign of obedience to God, and during her first three years as prioress, she was also novice mistress. On the occasion of her election, she certainly remembered how, during the traditional embrace with the other sisters on the day of her simple profession, she had heard the voice of Jesus telling her, “All these sisters will be the in13 Don Giorgio La Perla often accompanied the nuns to the foundation of the convents of Chiaromonte Gulfi, Enna, Vizzini and Siracusa. His mortal remains rest directly opposite those of Mother Maria Candida of the Eucharist, in the church of the Ragusa Carmel, where they were brought in 1971. The idea of starting a beatification trial for him has often been suggested (cf. Un prete nelle braccia di Dio, biography edited by the Discalced Carmelites of Siracusa, Siracusa 1971).

14 Letter of 22 August 1923, in Scritti della Serva di Dio madre Maria Candida dell’Eucaristia. Vol. VIII. Lettere dirette a Sacerdoti e a secolari, cit., pp. 90-91.

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strument of your beatification”. Nevertheless, it was necessary to ask for authorization from the Holy See for the election as prioress of a nun who had made her solemn profession only a few months before.

Mother Maria Candida fulfilled her role as prioress of the convent with great commitment and zeal and this occasionally created problems among the sisters. Mother Maria Candida did not accept the idea of a Carmelite who was not ready to literally plunge herself into religious perfection. The breaking of the Rule was very painful for her. “My dear,” she once said to a nun, “how can you offend Jesus like this?

Why do you waste your time in such trifles!”15 She was especially strict about the “parlour” during the important periods of Advent and Lent. Complaints were even presented in Rome, as the nuns’ relatives resented the restrictions imposed by the prioress. Mother Maria Candida was misunderstood and even humiliated but not overcome by discomfort.

One day, the canonical Visitor of the Order rebuked her in the refectory in front of all the nuns, in words which Mother Immacolata Maria of St Joseph, who witnessed the scene, described as being excessive and undeserved. Despite this, Mother Maria Candida did not react in a negative way, and the nuns soon recognized the value of their prioress and she was elected by the community for three more years and, after an interval of three years (1930-1933), during which she was first councillor, she was elected prioress again 15

Quoted in C. Mezzasalma, Nel roveto ardente. Madre Maria Candida dell’Eucaristia, Cultura Nuova, Firenze 1993, p. 74.

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until 1947, two years before her death. At the diocesan trial of beatification her sisters declared that she was like a “living rule” and that her attitude, always calm and self-controlled, was sufficient to persuade all the other nuns to observe the rule. Her spiritual director and confessor, Don Giorgio La Perla, made a declaration which remains an important testimony: “My intimate relationship with the Servant of God deeply touched and struck me. I was stunned by her great virtue, her constant work of an inner search for a higher perfection. For her, the spiritual life did not simply mean enjoying intimate contact with God but implied a continuous struggle, the incessant work of self-improvement, a daily effort to be able to fully experience the mystery of God.”16 Don Giorgio La Perla also said that he had never met such a meek and obedient soul.

In this context, we should not forget what a difficult and delicate task it is to be prioress of a closed convent like the Carmelite one. It does not simply require the ability to handle communal and daily life, with all its small and big problems. It also requires the ability to maintain, with equal control, the relationship with the world outside the convent. Furthermore, according to the rule of St Teresa of Avila, the prioress must be a guide for her sisters, a sort of spiritual mother. It is a truly difficult task, undoubtedly problematic.

And yet, on the Ragusa Carmel – which existed for little more than ten years – Mother Maria Candida of the Eucharist will leave an everlasting mark.

16

Cf. ibidem p. 74.

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In the meantime, a new and bigger problem weighed on the Ragusa Carmel. The city had grown much bigger and now basically surrounded the convent. In these conditions, it was no longer possible to continue a contemplative life and it was necessary to build a convent in a more secluded place. Mother Maria Candida, re-elected prioress in 1933, had to deal with this difficult task, all the more difficult considering that the community lacked the financial means to face the problem. Nevertheless, with her faith in God, she agreed to face it and started the building of the new convent in Via Marsala (where it still is). The construction brought many worries and anxieties, including the fact that for the nuns the idea of leaving the convent in Corso Italia was incredibly painful, as it had witnessed so many spiritual experiences connected to the rebirth of Carmel in Sicily!

Despite this, on 14 October 1937, on the eve of St Teresa of Avila’s feast, the community of Discalced Carmelites moved into the new convent and on 9 July 1939 the Archbishop of Siracusa-Ragusa, Monsignor Ettore Baranzini, consecrated the new church, dedicating it to St Teresa of Avila. “Now, sweet Jesus,” he wrote to Mother Maria Candida, “your spouse, our humble church, is complete. In it, You will be loved, glorified and Your love will be returned.” The troubles and efforts that Mother Maria Candida faced during those years were so intense that she had to bear the consequences for the rest of her life. The Ragusa convent undoubtedly made a major contribution to the rebirth of the Teresian Carmel in Sicily, along with the incessant work of Mother Immacolata 32

Maria of St Joseph,17 which would bring about the foundation of the Chiaromonte Gulfi, Enna, Catania and Vizzini Carmels. In 1947, Mother Maria Candida herself was chosen as foundress of the Siracusa Carmel but, due to the illness which led to her death, she was unable to fully accomplish her task.

During World War II (1943-1944), the war front reached Sicily and the Ragusa convent went through serious problems which Mother Maria Candida faced with extraordinary courage. The Institute of the Sisters of the Sacred Heart of the Blessed Maria Schininà also greatly helped the Ragusa Carmel which would not have been able to survive these dreadful conditions, especially as it was a closed convent. The nuns of the Blessed Schininà provided for the daily needs of the Discalced Carmelites and allowed them to survive. Following the design of Providence, these two Institutes were constantly united in a truly evangelical spirit of charity as they went through these difficult times. In addition, Mother Maria Candida’s family was dramatically affected by the war. On 5 March 1943 her sister Luisa died, scared to death by the devastating Allied bombings of Palermo and her daughter Giuseppina died on the following day. The Barba family was decimated as one member after another died at an incredible pace. The following year, Mother Maria Candida’s sister Giuseppina died and later, so did her sister-in-law Rosa, wife of her brother Stefano. Despite all this, at the end of the war, Moth17

Mother Immacolata Maria of St Joseph (Napoli 1880-Enna

1968).

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er Maria Candida could rejoice at the return of the Discalced Carmelite Fathers from the Veneto. On 28 September 1946 Mother Maria Candida offered them hospitality in the guest quarters of the convent until their building, located near the ancient Chiesa del Carmine, was completed. In 1947, Mother Maria Candida, despite the desire of the community to reelect her, definitively stepped down from the position of prioress of the convent and dedicated herself entirely to the foundation of the Siracusa Carmel. It was in this period that, once again in obedience to the prioress of the time, Mother Ines of Jesus, she wrote some meditations concerning the most signiďŹ cant events of Carmelite religious life, which would be published posthumously with the title Perfezione carmelitana (Carmelite Perfection). Shortly after, she was diagnosed as having liver cancer. Due to this illness, her last months were dreadful, but Mother Maria Candida had asked the Lord not to spare her, and He did not. Even the doctor who treated her was impressed by the strength and serenity with which she underwent her suffering. On 12 June 1949, while the bell of the convent was tolling for the Angelus, Mother Maria Candida, surrounded by her sisters, went to the house of the Father whispering, “Mary, Mary help meâ€?. At the news of her death, an endless procession of people came to pay homage and her body remained on view and visible through the gratings for three days. The fame of her sanctity spread at once and the diocesan trial for the beatification was opened in Ragusa seven years after her death and closed in 1962. After the diocesan approval of the 34

“miracle”, the Positio super vita et virtutibus was submitted to the Congregation for the Causes of Saints in Rome in 1992. On 18 December 2000 Pope John Paul II signed the decree of the Heroism of the Virtues of Mother Maria Candida of the Eucharist and, a little more than two years later, on 12 April 2003, he signed the decree approving the miracle.

3. Mother Maria Candida and her times Given this biographical synopsis, which is intense enough to fill an entire life, we wonder how Mother Maria Candida of the Eucharist could lead such an intense spiritual life to be defined a “mystic of the Eucharist”. How could her life within the family and her life as prioress at the Ragusa Carmel allow her to cultivate a contemplative life which undoubtedly required an incredible amount of energy and dedication? This question acquires a special significance especially when we consider the specific social and historical context of her time, which allows us to understand how difficult it is in some situations to undertake an evangelical journey with strong determination. Mother Maria Candida in fact went through her human experience between the end of the 18th century and the first half of the 19th, a period of serious social and political changes in which, as a member of the Italian upper middle class, she found herself partly involved. In other words, the twenty years she had to wait before entering Carmel must be interpreted by taking the actual historical situation into account.

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towards her devoted daughter. As she goes through a real night of the faith, at least as regards her relationship with Mary, Mother Maria Candida does not give up and continues to invoke the light. And finally the Lord answers her prayer. “Finally everything becomes clear, finally I understand and I have found Mary!” (p.

196). And in discovering the Virgin she also deeply understands the meaning of her passion for the Eucharist.

“I have discovered the secret − so much love, so much passion for Jesus Host, for Jesus dwelling among us, came to me from Mary! It has something of Her own Heart” (p. 198). In other words, her mission acquires a wider and more typically evangelic significance. She will love and make other people love the Eucharist in the same way as Mary has loved and loves her Son. The manuscript ends with a Consecration to Jesus Eucharist which summarises, in the prayer and in the offering of the self, the whole itinerary described so far. “I owe You everything, divine Eucharist!” Mother Maria Candida exclaims, expressing both her gratitude and her renewed devotion, and offering this experience of love and extremely deep spiritual union as a gift to the souls that still do not know it. “I wish all the atoms in my body and all the souls in the world were on fire because of You in Sacrament!” (p. 204).

6. Relevance of her message to the present time: John Paul II’s Encyclical on the Eucharist Having dealt with the mission God assigned to Mother Maria Candida of the Eucharist, who was 67

called to the extraordinary, intense and, at times, even difficult experience of the Eucharistic mystery, we cannot help concluding our introduction with a reference to the encyclical that John Paul II, in the 25th year of his papacy, dedicated precisely to the Eucharist and Its Relationship to the Church. This will help us to understand the relevance of Mother Maria Candida’s teaching to the present day and, in particular, how deeply rooted it is in the tradition of faith in the Church of which she was a faithful and grateful daughter. With his encyclical the Pope wanted to draw the attention of the Christian community to the centrality of the Eucharist for the life of the Church, inviting all believers to rediscover the beauty, loftiness and depth of the Eucharistic mystery, “fount and apex of the whole Christian life”,44 as defined by the Second Vatican Council with words taken from the encyclical.45 Right at the beginning of the document the Pope declares, “The Church draws her life from the Eucharist. This truth does not simply express a daily experience of faith, but recapitulates the heart of the mystery of the Church. In a variety of ways she joyfully experiences the constant fulfilment of the promise, ‘Lo, I am with you always, to the close of the age’ (Matt. 28.20); but in the Holy Eucharist, through the changing of bread and wine into the body and blood of the Lord, she rejoices in this presence with unique intensity.”46 44 Vatican Ecumenical Council II, Dogmatic constitution on the Church, Lumen Gentium, no. 11.

45 Cf. John Paul II, Ecclesia de Eucharistia (17 April 2003), no. 1.

46 Ibidem.

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Further on, the Pope declares that the aim of the encyclical is to reawaken in the heart of believers this Eucharistic “amazement”,47 and his choice of an expression which does not reflect typical theological language, naturally brings us back to the passionate tone of Mother Maria Candida’s pages. It was precisely in order to stir in souls a fervent love, like her own, for the Eucharist “in order to make You the object of love and the quickening of the heart, in order to foster Your Eucharistic Kingdom!” (p 106) that Mother Maria Candida agreed to write down her very special interior experience, as a gift for the others. “The beauty of the Eucharist, the sweetness of the symbols, my Jesus in person there on His throne and then the greatness, the splendour of the Church, of all religion, the magnificence of worship, the sanctity of the sacred ministers, the immeasurable treasure of the Word of Jesus…” (p. 104). Mother Maria Candida knew that all this was contained in the immensity of the Eucharist, and it is for this reason that in her case we can talk about a mission, within the very heart of the Church, rather than simply a wish to reawaken a devotion for the Eucharist.

It is surprising how the entire structure of Mother Maria Candida’s text in which, one after the other, all the central aspects of Christian faith – from the theological virtues to the experience of communion with God, of reparation and immolation, from the religious Vows to love for one’s neighbour and the Virgin Mary – acquire a special meaning through the 47

Cf. ibidem, no. 6.

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Eucharist, closely resembles the structure which John Paul II gave to his encyclical seventy years later. Although here we cannot analyse it in detail, it is quite evident that it goes through all aspects of the Christian mystery, rediscovering its Eucharistic nature and source: the Easter sacrifice of Christ, the gift of the Holy Spirit, the eschatological perspective, the building of the Church, the apostolic mission, ecclesial communion, ecumenical commitment, saintliness and the figure of Mary.

Nevertheless, it is worth briefly clarifying at least three aspects of this extraordinary similarity between Mother Maria Candida’s writings and the encyclical Ecclesia de Eucharistia. Firstly, the wonderful autobiographical pages that open John Paul II’s encyclical letter recall some of the fundamental steps of his Eucharistic experience. There is the memory of the Eucharistic celebration in the Refectory in Jerusalem during the Jubilee of 2000, which opens the encyclical perfectly; there is the memory of more than fifty years of priesthood as a servant of the Eucharist; and the memory of his first Mass, in the crypt in Krakow’s cathedral, recalled at the end of the encyclical. This is what we repeatedly find in Mother Maria Candida’s pages, when she introduces and develops her reflection through the memory of the gifts she was granted by God. The experience of the God Jesus Christ is not made up of a series of abstract truths and concepts, but is the story of an encounter, of a conversion and of a communion which happens because of specific events, people and places. Christian faith is faith in the incarnation of the Son who became a man and was 70

part of time and history, and who can still be clearly found in the Eucharist. John Paul II and Mother Maria Candida seem to say that learning to approach this mystery means learning to see reality with new eyes, sticking to life and its truth. This life is in fact made up of darkness and light, defeats and victories, sorrows and joys which Jesus has come to save and redeem. It is here that we must wait for Him and welcome Him, bearing in mind the elect way of the Eucharist, humble and yet sublime, that He Himself has prepared in order to foster our encounter with Him. Another theme to which John Paul II repeatedly refers to in his encyclical, is sacramental communion, a fundamental aspect in which our participation in the Eucharistic sacrifice is fully accomplished. “We can say not only that each of us receives Christ, but also that Christ receives each of us. He enters into friendship with us: ‘You are my friends’ (John 15.14). Indeed it is because of Him that we have life: ‘He who eats me will live because of me’ (John 6.57). In a sublime way, Eucharistic communion brings about the mutual ‘abiding’ of Christ and each of his followers: ‘Abide in me, and I in you’ (John 15.4).”48 The goal of the Eucharistic Sacrifice – the Pope writes – is the communion of believers with Christ and it is in fact through communion with His body and blood that Christ communicates His Spirit, a divine gift which is at the root of all other gifts, and that the liturgy entreats from God in the Eucharistic epiclesis.49 “The 48 49

Ibidem, no. 22.

Cf. ibidem nos. 16-17.

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gift of Christ and his Spirit which we receive in Eucharistic communion superabundantly fulfils the yearning for fraternal unity deeply rooted in human heart; at the same time it elevates the experience of fraternity already present in our common sharing at the same Eucharistic table to a degree that far surpasses that of the simple human experience of sharing a meal.”50 Mother Maria Candida was therefore perfectly right to become excited at the thought of a well-done Communion, which is the only source of that grace which performs our transformation. She even became an apostle of this union, with an appeal which, according to what John Paul II writes, has not lost its relevance to the present time, “Let all the souls, Jesus, receive Communion for love and with love, let them put all their effort into devoting as much time as they can to thanksgiving, and I will soon bring You, my Beloved, souls yearning for You, determined to offer themselves and genuinely dedicated to the attainment of their own sanctification!” (pp. 139-140).

The last aspect we will deal with, as a kind of farewell − and having left out others, such as the appeal to the decorum and beauty of celebrations and churches, or the value assigned to the Eucharistic cult outside the Mass − is the relationship between Eucharist and Mary which, both in John Paul II’s encyclical and in Mother Maria Candida’s text, is dealt with at the end.

Here the parallel is almost literal. Mother Maria Candida writes, “Divine Eucharist, You were first given to me by Mary! I would not own You if Mary had not 50

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Ibidem, no. 24.

consented to become Mother of the Word Incarnate. I cannot separate You from Mary, and Mary from You! Hail Body born of the Virgin Mary! Hail Mary, dawn of the Eucharist!” (p. 191) And almost commenting on this, John Paul II writes, “In a certain sense Mary lived her Eucharistic faith even before the institution of the Eucharist, by the very fact that she offered her virginal womb for the incarnation of God’s Word. The Eucharist, while commemorating the passion and resurrection, is also in continuity with the incarnation. At the Annunciation, Mary conceived the Son of God in the physical reality of his body and blood, thus anticipating within herself what to some degree happens sacramentally in every believer who receives, under the signs of bread and wine, the Lord’s body and blood.”51 The “yes” that Mary pronounced, once and for all, to the Father, welcoming the Son in her womb, is the same that every believer pronounces when receiving the body and blood of Christ. Therefore, Mary is the model from which we learn how to receive the Eucharistic Jesus. “And,” the Pope asks, “is not the enraptured gaze of Mary as she contemplated the face of the newborn Christ and cradled him in her arms that unparalleled model of love which should inspire us every time we receive Eucharistic communion?”52 This is something Mother Maria Candida had already understood when she wrote, “In my Communions Mary is always with me, it is from Her hands that I want to receive Him, it is with Her Heart 51 52

Ibidem, no. 55.

Ibidem.

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that I want to welcome Him, and I offer It to Jesus.” (p. 195) And further on, “When the most sweet Host is in my heart, I sometimes feel the same tenderness as Mary did when She held Jesus in Her arms. I would like to protect Him from indifference and neglect, I would like to enshrine Him within my heart, to soothe Him, that most cherished Body, that most innocent and beneficial Flesh.” (p. 200) Although the passionate and almost physical tone of her exclamations might surprise, it should not be forgotten that Mother Maria Candida is a spiritual daughter of St Teresa of Avila and her extraordinary Christian realism. Yes, the Eucharist is truly a taste of our future glory, a token we receive while waiting for the fullness of communion and the knowledge of God. Of the Eucharist, as well as of Mary, we will never say enough: Mother Maria Candida’s mission, in reality, has just started.

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Chapter 1 A VOCATION FOR THE EUCHARIST

Oh my Divine Eucharist, powerful beat of my heart – entirely Yours – sweetest passion and most powerful magnet,1 if only I could express my praise to You! If only I could tell what I feel for You, what

by Your grace pours out of my heart, at particular moments, which are not rare! What You have given me, what I have given You by Your own grace! But no, I am unable to do it. You are the only One who can, the only One who could, portraying everything, drawing from inside me, from my life, as if looking through a mysterious lens. There would be such splendour if You did, such colours, such warmth, my Jesus, such a story!2 I strongly wish to live in a kind of burial, in the sweetest happiness of being hidden, unknown! And yet, more than once my heart, drunk with Your love, has throbbed with longing to open out and show Your 1 Meaning: compelling calling. The magnet is a recurrent image in the text (translator’s note).

2 In these few introductory words, Mother Maria Candida has already presented the central theme of this first part of her notebook on the Eucharist, namely, the wish not to allow her intense spiritual experience to remain hidden. In the tradition of the reformed Carmelite Order there is the well-known “custom” of joining contemplative prayer with the need to convey its contents to other people. cf. St Teresa of Avila, The Life of St Teresa of Avila by Herself 1-2; St Thérèse of Lisieux, Autobiographical Manuscript A, 2r.

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gift, and tell of You, sacramental Love! When I was still living with my family, one morning, returning from Holiest Communion, I went happily down to the garden to linger with my Jesus, in thanksgiving!3 I loved Him and, quivering with love, gazed at Heaven, the only source of relief and pleasure for my eyes, second only to the Holy Host, Heaven, from which I had received a token in Holiest Communion. While thinking, in my elation, I said, “My God, after one happiness, another one! The reward of Holiest Communion – Paradise!” And my heart, amazed at such divine munificence, opened up. Oh celestial moments, known only to the Beloved and to the Angels! A sweet yearning then came into my heart to speak of Him, of the gift He had bestowed upon me, of His things!

Simply to make them known, in His honour, in praise of One Who is so generous! And I could not help giving utterance to my thoughts. “I would like to tell everything, everything. I would like everything to be known before I die!” But soon this need gave way to the wish, to the interior need, not to write anything.

Dear silence, saintly necessity of silence for my soul!

Another time, while I was on my own, enjoying the company of Jesus and devoting my thoughts to Jesus Host, I found myself sweetly engaged in praise of Him. Sweetly, lovingly, although concealed from sight, I con3 In her general confession, Mother Maria Candida likes to mention several episodes which reveal her love for the Eucharist.

The memory of when she began to understand the mystery of the real presence of Jesus in the Eucharistic Sacrament is particularly significant (cf. Nella stanza del mio cuore, op. cit., pp. 59-60). As we will see further on, it is typical of Mother Maria Candida to describe her interior experience through personal memories.

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centrated on a beautiful Host, and my heart poured out a passionate soliloquy. I spoke with such sublime, passionate words and praises of my Beloved Sacrament, that I myself could appreciate the beauty of them and was astonished. No, it was not I who uttered them, but the Spirit of Love, drawing from my heart, who uttered through my lips those attributes, those words, those praises of the great God of the Host.4 I regretted that this hymn was not heard and would remain unheard, and I would have been happy if the saintly Angels had recorded it. I hope I will find it in Heaven!

Now to another grace. That Corpus Christi Day5 was marked by my Jesus! Since Holy Mass the night before, I had been so overwhelmed by a feeling of tenderness and trust towards my sacramental Good, that 4 Mother Maria Candida’s first intense mystic élan can be found in this record of her spiritual experience. We will find more examples, all through her notebook, and the typically Carmelite style of joining personal experience to the praise of God always emerges in them. In this case, we should note the highly mystical character of her interior experience, namely, the astonishment at what happens to the soul touched by divine grace.

5 This is Corpus Christi Day of 1933, the year in which Mother Maria Candida started working on her notebook on the Eucharist.

The festival of Corpus Christi, introduced into the Catholic liturgy as early as 1264 at the instigation of the mystic Juliana of Mont Cornillon, was originally an expression of nuptial mysticism. Between the end of the 19th and the beginning of the 20th century, the festival also acquired a strong social significance and the custom of the adoration of the Eucharist and the processions spread with the intention of showing the Christian faith in the Eucharist to a world heading towards secularisation. It should be noted that 1933 was the Holy Year of the Redemption proclaimed by Pope Pius XI. Furthermore, in that same year, Edith Stein, the future St Teresa Benedicta of the Cross, entered Carmel in Cologne while in Germany the ascent of Nazism was by then opening the way to World War II.

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I could not help shedding some tears. I felt so miserable, with a craving for holiness, purity and love. I was aware of my nothingness, my unworthiness, my ugliness, and pined with tenderness for Jesus, full of sorrow and concern for my faults and sins, unable to improve! I then began to feel great trust in my Jesus Host, for this Host of Love that has performed my transformation, has had a total effect on me, has made me pure6 and has made me His Candida,7 trust for this Host to whom I owe everything. And tenderly addressing Him I said, “I fear nothing! Even if I reached death as miserable as this, coming to me, Host of Love, You would wipe everything away, You would compensate for everything and, sanctifying and beautifying me with Your own merits, with Your own sanctity, with Your blood, You would give me wings to fly like an immaculate dove, up to Your bosom, to the top of the Heavens, to the summit of sanctity and love!” Thus I remained in peace and trust, I was happy and full of love. And when, leaving the choir8, I was given a holy picture showing two wonderful pools of clear, beautiful water which poured down from a Host placed higher up, with snow-white doves and little lambs 6 In the Italian version the use of the word candida, meaning pure, is an obvious reference to her name as nun (translator’s note).

7 It is worth reading her memory of the ceremony of taking the veil, in which she recalls the mysterious way in which she was given the name Candida. This memory is part of another autobiographical notebook, written in 1922 by the novice sister Maria Candida in obedience to her teacher Mother Immacolata de Renzis, founder of the Enna and Chiaramonte Gulfi (Ragusa) Carmels, and published with the title Salita: primi passi (op. cit., pp. 61-63).

8 The chapel where the Carmelite nuns meet for prayer.

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cooling themselves and washing in them, how could I tell of my inner joy, my full trust in Jesus Host? I was now completely reassured as to what I had so strongly hoped for! And this was by no means the first time.9 In the evening, on the eve of the great feast, I felt so much love for Jesus and an infinite need to remain at His feet! I could have stayed there all night, or I hoped at least an hour. The community remained a little longer in the choir, in vigil, but Jesus denied me such joy. It is so hard to explain what price I had to pay for this. My heart dried up with the intense effort of sacrifice; only Jesus knows! My life is full of such sacrifices, and Jesus Host is both the object of my immense love, and my immense martyrdom! Nevertheless, I believe my holocaust10 was never as bad as that evening! But I had enough strength to smile, in my torment, and smiling I obeyed and took leave of Jesus. At His feet, I submitted my shattered will and then lifted my holocaust with Jesus Host, with all the Holy Masses of that hour, up to the throne of the Father and for Your Eucharistic kingdom, my Jesus! Let this happen, for Your Love! In my cell I renewed my offering and, I repeat, in my experience it had never reached so high, up to the Highest! Up to where I had hoped to arrive one day, in the morning, through the 9 The holy picture Mother Maria Candida refers to, which she kept in her breviary until her death, is presently held in the archive of the Ragusa Carmel. This expression of devotion, though typical of the period, is not lacking in gracefulness and imagination. It is customary for the Carmelite Prioress to give her nuns a holy picture or thought on particular festivals.

10 Translated literally from the Italian “olocausto”, meaning sacrifice (translator’s note).

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work of Jesus Host on my soul. Joining my will to His, I fell asleep very close to His heart, intending to spend the whole night in perfect union with Jesus Eucharist.

As soon as I got up in the morning, addressing my first thought and sigh to the Holy Host, to whom I felt gently attracted, I also felt, as never before, that I had been entirely caught by the Eucharist who, in a very special way, was assigning me to another little mission.11 Am I mistaken? Maybe. But I believe that the sweetness of that moment was far above anything we can possibly conceive! And I responded with full emotional participation, complete dedication and consecration of myself to Jesus in Sacrament and to His things.

At Solemn High Mass I felt so much love for the great Mystery, so much tenderness that I could have melted! I wish I had been alone! Though restraining myself, I gave Jesus the throbbing of my heart and a few tears. The entire great phase12 of my life, that is 11

Here we find a unique and rather deep assertion which, in reality, represents the final attainment of a very long and complex spiritual and mystic journey, which lasted her whole life. Mother Maria Candida had in fact the perception of her “Eucharistic mission” even before entering the Ragusa Carmel, as she recounts in her general confession: “Jesus has greatly honoured me by allowing me to experience such love and longing for the Eucharist. Won by so much love, I have rejoiced thinking that Heaven has assigned me to the Holy Communion. I do not understand what this means, but many times, in a spontaneous and loving outpouring, I repeat to Him sighing, ‘You have made me for You in the Sacrament!’” (translated from Nella stanza del mio cuore, op. cit., pp. 61-62, curators’ italics).

12 This term may sound rather obscure but, considering what follows, Mother Maria Candida of the Eucharist is undoubtedly referring to the entire span of her life, or starting at least from the discovery of her special inclination towards the Eucharist. It is a phase

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all my love for Jesus in Sacrament, all the suffering for Jesus Host, His graces, His tenderness, His gifts, the transformation I had undergone through Him, everything was before me, as in a mirror! Almost in a state of rapture I thought, “Shall this remain hidden?” I felt a great and pure wish to make everything known, to tell everything. And as I quivered with so much love, this need increased inside me. What could I do? How could I tell such things? Conscious of my impotence and of my great and pure desire to make the graces of my sacramental Love known, one thought gave me peace and fulfilled my other need to be hidden. “Well then, I will tell, proclaim everything in Heaven, to all the celestial assembly, so that my Jesus will receive the honour He deserves!” Having made this decision, I stopped thinking about it and all I could do was just love and love! (Nevertheless, I would have been and would be very happy to describe my sweet past of Eucharistic graces and love in praise of my God from a clear point of view and with no hesitation).

Nevertheless, my supreme Good had not made the same decision, but had a great holocaust in store for me. At the end of Holy Mass I went back to the choir to adore Jesus Host on view all day, and His graces continued in my soul. How impotent I am to describe, and how difficult it is to talk about such things! But, my Jesus, You do expect and have greatly expected it from me, so I will! of life in the sense that it is a time in which the action of God has performed and is performing a true transformation. It is a time of which it is roughly possible to identify the beginning, but which is still open to the action of God.

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The beauty of the Eucharist, the sweetness of the symbols, my Jesus in person there on His throne and then the greatness, the splendour of the Church, of all religion, the magnificence of worship, the sanctity of the sacred ministers, the immeasurable treasure of the Word of Jesus… Everything, everything was before me, while my soul languished as if rapt in admiration, sacred astonishment, immense gratitude and delight!

“Oh Jesus, Jesus, how well You have done all things!

The splendour of Your religion! What Church is this which You have come to found? O mirabilia, the greatness of Your works, truly divine things!”13 (It is not the first time that my soul has been entranced in admiration, consumed with tenderness and tears of love! Oh, I taste, I throw myself into the works of my Jesus! Oh Redeemer, my heart overflows with love before Your works! And the Holy Gospel! There are times when what I hear are no longer words but instead each syllable is honey, warmth, substance! It is solid gold, a gem of infinite worth! I breathe it in…

13 We can certainly apply the axiom Lex orandi, lex credendi (the law of prayer is the law of belief) to these expressions by Mother Maria Candida. According to St Irenaeus, the Eucharist is a term of comparison against which theology can put itself to the test, “Our way of thinking is in accord with the Eucharist and the Eucharist conforms to our way of thinking.” In the same way, Mother Maria Candida contemplates through the Eucharist the mystery of the Church of Christ, founded on His Word and now to be found in the liturgy and in the testimony of life. As a contemporary author has written, “There is a book of which Christ is the author, and He is the only one who can write it: in it, summed up in two symbols, the bread and the wine, the entire theology is included. It is the Eucharist, wonder of grace and miracle of theology.” (translated from F.X. Durrwell, L’Eucharestie, sacrement pascal, Paris 1981, p. 181).

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and it burns my heart, I would like to receive it as the most nourishing food. And my soul feeds on it through unutterable tenderness. I cry out! I wish I could melt for my Jesus and His things! “No one, my Beloved, has ever spoken like You!”).

At His feet I was therefore overwhelmed by love and admiration and those were moments of utter bliss!

No one could have taken me away from there! But soon the Holy Rule obliged me to go where a great sacrifice was waiting for me! After lunch, Our Mother,14 smiling, bade me write about Jesus Eucharist! How can I describe my surprise at such a command, after what my soul had gone through at Holy Mass? This was the answer from Jesus. How could I doubt it? Meanwhile, that longing, that feeling of relief, had abandoned me.

That clear mirror, which contained all the love of Jesus in Sacrament for me, and all my foolish love for Him, was no longer before me. And when I think that I had made the decision to proclaim everything in Heaven!

What could I do? What difficulty, what impotence and what darkness. It was as if nothing had happened. It was precisely in that condition that Jesus now wanted my work and my holocaust. I stuttered a few words 14 “Our Mother” is the expression with which the Discalced Carmelites commonly refer to, or talk about, the prioress of their convent. That year the prioress of the Ragusa Carmel was Mother Maria Teresa of Jesus (1879-1968). Mother Maria Candida filled the office of Novice Mistress. According to St Teresa of Avila’s rule, the Carmelite nun should be mainly devoted to contemplative prayer for the Church and the world. Only out of obedience, as for example in the case of St Thérèse of Lisieux and of Edith Stein, is she allowed to devote some of her time to writing about spiritual memories or even to studying.

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to declare my impotence, but the attitude of Our Mother and what she told me to write, increased the difficulty and the sacrifice. I had no idea what to do.

But grace was with me and, even though tormented, I said nothing, not one word to escape from or mitigate my obedience. But Jesus, what moments I went through before giving in, before being able to embrace what I disliked so much, what I was not able to do!

Now here I am, Jesus, to obey Your will. You know that I had already determined to trust You. I am capable of nothing, I myself am nothing, but I do cherish obedience, and to accomplish a perfect act of obedience is my only ambition, to give You eternal glory, to tell You, my sacramental Love, all my love! At Your feet I consign the holocaust of my shattered will. Oh Love, for You I renounce my judgement and freedom, to You I devote every word in order to make You the object of love and the quickening of the heart, in order to foster Your Eucharistic Kingdom! Our Lady of the Blessed Sacrament, pray for this.15 15 In just a few pages Mother Maria Candida refers twice to the “Eucharistic Kingdom”. The Eucharist, as an icon of the Kingdom of God, is a well-known theme in the Christian Orient and it is rather unusual to find such a strong analogy in her writings. This has to do with the entire question of salvation in which the Eucharist plays a fundamental role. As stated in the Second Vatican Council, the Eucharist is the “summit” and the source of life in the Church (cf. SC, no. 10). The Eucharist is conceived as the supreme seat where belief finds its nourishment, dwells, is professed, analysed thoroughly and passed on. The following chapters of Mother Maria Candida’s notebook will serve as clarification of this truth of the Church’s faith. Finally, it is worth noticing the invocation to Mary as “Our Lady of the Blessed Sacrament”. This association will reappear, with even greater force, at the conclusion of Mother Maria Candida’s manuscript.

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Chapter 2 THE EUCHARIST AND FAITH

Oh my sacramental Beloved, I can see You, I believe in You! Even though You are hidden from me by the sacred Eucharistic veils, by the sweet Ciborium, by the little door of the Tabernacle, by gratings, by walls, I can see You, I believe in You even more!1 Oh holy faith!

One day, as I was passing by the choir, I lovingly genuflected as I was accustomed to do. In that instant 1

The theme of this second chapter of the notebook, faith, is presented from the very beginning as a comparison between seeing and believing, which clearly refers to the well-known passage from the Gospel of John concerning the experience of Thomas the Apostle who doubted the truth of the resurrection until he met the Risen Christ (cf. John 20.26-29). Instead, Mother Maria Candida emphasises that, although faith in the Eucharist cannot be supported by sight (the Host is in fact also hidden from her eyes by gratings and walls), she firmly and lovingly believes with “the eyes of faith” (Rousselot). This faith in the real presence of Jesus in the Eucharist is not, as it might superficially appear to be, so obvious. It is instead a truth of faith repeatedly denied throughout the history of the Church, from the Berengarius controversy in the 11th century to the Lutheran Reformation, to mention only the best known examples.

This is obviously due to the fact that this truth, widely and constantly documented by all the liturgical and doctrinal traditions of the Church, has a significance and a redeeming function of primary importance. In fact, the formula for the consecration of the Eucharist underlines the personal character of the presence of Jesus: this is not a sacred food, nourishment of sanctity, but My Body and, according to the Semitic way of thinking, the body is the same as the person whose presence it expresses.

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I received such a sweet, deep grace which is hard to describe! I saw, I felt (while a warm sweetness overwhelmed me) how beautiful and worthy faith is for us Carmelites! How deeper and loftier it is! Separated by that altar, we direct our pure, burning look through thick walls, and we find and contemplate the Beloved in the most noble Sacrament.2 Then, powerfully attracted by the same Love which resides in our bosoms, we bend down to converse with Him in intimacy! And this is our vocation, this is our Heaven! It is the essence of our holy rule, the divine call for an almost hermit-like life.3 What I 2

The entire passage starts with an exclamation full of wonder and adoration (“Oh holy faith!”), but immediately afterwards, she hints at the connection between the Eucharist and the Carmelite vocation, which she develops in the following part. This is a theme particularly dear to St Teresa of Avila whose first idea of reform was to found a “little corner of Heaven”, a small group of prayer with just twelve nuns and a prioress, with the Madonna at one entrance, St Joseph at the other, and the nuns in the middle with Jesus Eucharist (cf. The Life of St Teresa of Avila written by Herself 32.11). As she herself records, Teresa of Avila was wont to have this deeply evangelical vision of religious life during prayer and after Communion.

3 This is an obvious allusion to the beginnings of the Carmelite Order (13th century) and to the Rule dictated by St Albert Patriarch of Jerusalem to the first monks of Mount Carmel, called “Elijah’s sons”. As noted by all commentators, it is a Rule which unites the hermit life with coenobitic or community life, attributing a primary role to the daily celebration (in those days a real novelty!) of the Eucharist. Later, St Teresa of Avila developed the primitive idea in an original way, emphasising the ecclesial and missionary purpose of the Carmelite vocation. “I would the evil were not so great and I did not see more being lost every day. Oh, my sisters in Christ! Help me to entreat this of the Lord, Who has brought you together here for that very purpose. This is your vocation; this must be your business; these must be your desires; these your tears; these your petitions” (The Way of Perfection 1.4-5). In particular, Mother Maria Candida stresses the

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felt and experienced was so sweet and divine that, I repeat, it cannot be expressed! And it made me delightfully happy and a lover!

To contemplate our Beloved in the Sacrament with a double faith, to live with Him who comes each day, to be with Him in our inmost soul, this is our life!4 The more intense our interior life is, the more Carmelite we are and the more progress we make towards perfection. This contact, this union with Jesus is everything and what fruits of virtue can spring from it! It is something which must be experienced. Living with Jesus means living His virtues, listening to His most sweet voice, to His most loving will, instantly obeying and fulfilling it. We close our eyes, lovingly anxious to find Him again, to contemplate Him at the depths of our heart. Isn’t it a need which has remained within us after morning Communion? Isn’t it the attraction of Him, who has remained there and dwells there? The Ciborium of the Holy Tabernacle and the ciborium of our heart, I cannot separate them!5 How often, even if we are in the choir before interior dimension of the Carmelite vocation, grounded on faith, and to be found in this privileged relationship with the Eucharist.

4 The “double faith” Mother Maria Candida refers to is not just faith in the real presence of Jesus in the Eucharist, but also faith in the presence of the Lord in the heart of the believer. The relationship between these two dimensions of the presence of Christ in the life of his disciples is clearly stated in the Gospel of St John when Jesus declares, “I am the bread of life. Whoever eats my flesh remains in me, and I in him” (John 6.48, 56). In the Revelation Jesus also uses Eucharistic language when He promises, “I will enter his house and dine with him, and he with me” (Rev. 3.20).

5 Mother Maria Candida here uses an image which, although rather strong, is very effective in expressing the “double faith” which

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Jesus in Sacrament, even if the Eucharist is displayed, we feel the need to concentrate on our inner self, where we can find our Jesus and be with Him. What mystery of love is this intimacy with our Beloved! I sometimes think of it and, deeply touched, I praise Love for it, and contemplate it with emotion.

Everything on earth has disappeared for us since we are secluded and far away from those who have loved us so much. Our blessed eyes can see no more and yet they still close in order to detach themselves even from this holy place. They close, anxious to find Him again, to see Jesus! Mystery of love, most tender enchantment! He lets himself be found by the heart that seeks Him, by the soul that can do without many things for the love of Him.6 He reveals Himself to the eyes of the absorbed soul. No, a distracted nun will never be able to truly enjoy her Beloved. To look only at Him, to avoid useless and curious glances, to persevere in the observance of the modesty prescribed by our Rule: what heroism and what a sure way to draw His most lovshe mentions earlier. Just as the chalice-like Ciborium contains the Eucharist in the Tabernacle, so the heart of the believer truly and jealously holds Christ.

6 What Mother Maria Candida expresses here seems to us to be a beautiful comment on the words used by St Teresa of Avila in the Exclamations of the Soul to God: “Now let my own self die and let a new one, greater and better than myself, be born so that I can serve Him. Let Him live and give me life; let Him rule and me be His slave; my soul does not want a better freedom.” (XVII.3). The long established Augustinian tradition of the Confessions also emerges here: “I entered and with the eye of my soul – such as it was – saw above the same eye of my soul and above my mind the immutable light … I was made by it… He who knows the Truth knows that light” (7.10).

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ing glances on our soul, and sharpen our interior eye, in the contemplation of Love.7 It is no small virtue always to have a modest eye, modest and turned in the right direction. Waiting to receive the final prize in Heaven, the humiliated eyes of our faith will be brightened by Jesus! To be close to Our God in Sacrament, like the blessed souls in Heaven, in front of the supreme Good, this is what we must do, according to our Holy Mother Teresa.8 Seven times a day we surround the throne of our Good, the sacred Tabernacle, reciting divine praises: how much faith such a lofty action deserves! If we could actually penetrate those Eucharistic veils, would we not immediately find ourselves before the Highest? Then what re7 The stress that Mother Maria Candida puts on the modesty of eyes should not surprise us. It was in fact customary in the religious life of those years to insist on detachment from the senses in order to attain self control. Indeed, the importance of interior concentration is carefully emphasised by St Teresa of Avila both in her Constitutions of 1567 (chap. V) and, in particular, in her The Way of Perfection (27.1) where such concentration is presented as the fundamental condition for elevating oneself above one’s surroundings and truly opening oneself, deep into the soul, to the divine communication. Undoubtedly, in these remarks as well, Mother Maria Candida clearly shows herself to be an “educator” of souls, who wishes to direct others towards an authentic religious life.

8 St Teresa of Jesus (1518-1582) was the great mystic of Avila and reformer of the Carmelite order, who was proclaimed a Doctor of the Church by Pope Paul VI in 1970. Mother Maria Candida refers once again to The Way of Perfection written by the saint under direct request from the nuns of the first convent of Discalced Carmelites of St Joseph in Avila. St Teresa urges her daughters to remain close to Jesus Eucharist through a wonderful paraphrasing of the Paternoster and particularly of the words give us this day our daily bread: “The only reason He remains with us,” she writes, “is to help and encourage and sustain us so that we shall do that will, which, as we have said, is to be fulfilled in us” (The Way of Perfection 34.1).

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spect, what attention, what annihilation! Who would dare to linger on a different thought, or could afford to look away, in search of some comfort? And why should our God not receive so much faith in so much reality? Let the genuecting, the bowing never be a mechanical gesture, let our gaze be turned up to Him and let adoration and love accompany and beautify everything.9 I remember that, almost from the beginning, Jesus has inspired me to sanctify that genuflection which we do at the altar before sitting opposite one another. 10 Since then, I have always addressed an interior look, a smile, a tribute of love to the divine Prisoner, like a temporary farewell, before turning away from the altar.

Oh holy faith, grow in our hearts. Then there will be the truest progress within us, we are assured of this by our Holy Mother.11 When respect grows within the soul and we give more importance to God’s things (even simply making the noble sign of the 9 Here, as previously, Mother Maria Candida demonstrates that she has a very special sensitivity as a teacher. In her eyes, the daily practices have great signiďŹ cance, since they can often reveal the extent of the faith with which they are carried out and felt. She was not, therefore, a soul enclosed in her own spiritual subjectivity, but always open to the interior journey of her sisters and of all those who met her.

10 Mother Maria Candida is referring to the quick bow which the Discalced Carmelite nuns make to the Tabernacle, on entering the choir and just before sitting in the stalls where they pray facing one another.

11 This is another reference to St Teresa of Avila, commonly called by this name by the sons and daughters of the Teresian Carmelite Order.

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cross), then we can hope for strength of virtue and love, then there is true progress!12 My Jesus, I will offer You flowers by performing our ceremonies with precision, faith and love and carefully observing the modesty of eyes.13

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Here we find another instructive hint. Personal virtue and love are not easily attained but are rather the fruit of a long and difficult journey, the fruit of growth and progress.

13 As we will see in the following chapters, Mother Maria Candida has the habit of concluding her reflection with a personal resolution connected to the theme dealt with. In this case, we note the association between liturgy and moral behaviour. On the one hand there is the preoccupation with living the liturgy with dignity and, on the other, the need to bring this liturgy into daily life. The Christian liturgy is in fact the expression of faith, hope and charity because here believers relive Jesus’ death, experience the redeeming presence of the Resurrected, and await the glorious Parousia of the Lord. This means that believers are bound to the actuality of their existence and need symbols and signs to express their experience of faith. Thus, it will always be true that signs and symbols are necessary in order to make the rites fully become a part of our life.

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Chapter 10 THE EUCHARIST AND MARY

Divine Eucharist, You were first given to me by Mary! I would not possess You if Mary had not consented to become Mother of the Word Incarnate. I cannot separate You from Mary, and Mary from You! Hail Body born of the Virgin Mary! Hail Mary, dawn of the Eucharist! Oh beloved treasures, the two of You are just one thing in my heart. Holy Love, I want to burn in You!1 Oh Mary, my Mother!

The Immaculate Conception and the Host of our altars, this is the dazzling and most pure brightness which ravishes me and which I would always want 1 The final part of the manuscript deals with the relationship between the mystic dimension of Mary and the Eucharist, a rather difficult but also original theme. Mother Maria Candida immediately insists on Mary’s divine maternity and the deep communion which joins Mother and Son, culminating in the beautiful exclamation “Hail Mary, dawn of the Eucharist.” But her attention is in the first place drawn to the fiat of Mary whom Elizabeth praised as a believer in the word of God (Luke 1.45), because she responded to the divine proposal with a complete willingness to serve the Lord, that is, with “the obedience of faith” (Rom. 1.5). In reality, Mary’s faith does not simply consist of adherence to what God says. It is also the complete offer of herself and, above all, contact with the ineffable divine mystery of the Word made flesh, which gradually becomes deeper and deeper as her life progresses in harmony with the life of the Son. In other words, the strong connection between Mary and the Eucharist that Mother Maria Candida refers to is nothing other than the mystic completion of the journey of faith of the Mother of God.

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to behold and imitate perfectly. Jesus gives me Mary, Mary Jesus! To the two of them I give my whole self with irresistible impulse and an unquenchable need for love. I give all of myself, without restraint! I would like to love Them as much as it is possible on earth. Mary, I would like to behold Her, to possess Her. It is easier for me to catch a glimpse of Jesus, to enjoy and possess Him. Mary is hiding. Why? And yet I do love Her, though I cannot feel it. Whenever I hear someone singing for or reading about Mary, and when I do it myself, I cannot help crying and pining away. What a mystery! Mary makes me weep and, in order to prevent myself from praying to Her or reading about Her, I have to avoid thinking of Her and beholding Her image. I have to hide Her image and read the words that speak of Her quickly, concentrating on their pronunciation rather than on their meaning. My God, what does this mean? I envy the souls who love Her, I invoke this love! And although I cannot feel it, my pen writes the name of my Mother, my lips pronounce it, and I do my best to persuade everyone to follow Mary, to trust Her, to look for Her help and, above all, to love Her. I am happy to say that I have partly succeeded in this, thanks to Her own goodness, and I have contributed to spreading devotion to such a Mother and to the rosary. I have done all that I can to make Her blessed Scapular known and I would like to see all the souls wearing it!2 2 In this passage, Mother Maria Candida describes the mystic journey that has led her to the contemplation of the mystery of Mary, which is very closely connected to the mystery of Her Son. With great frankness, she reveals her wonder and surprise at what is happening inside

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But I torture my heart. I do not love Mary. Where is my affection? Do I think of Her? Do I quiver for Her? Do I imitate Her? This is a deep sorrow for me, it is a mystery to me. Only in Heaven will I be able to understand and explain it. I think my Mother has decided to hide away from me as a form of terrible trial. I have prayed to Her so much, since my early days I have never failed to honour Her, and I have trusted everything into Her hands including my own self, with so much holy foolishness! I have written my consecration to Her in so many ways, and Her name is written in my bosom. Many times I have written and repeated to Her every fine word, every complete devotion to Her to be found in the lives of the Saints and in the prayers to Mary. I cannot imagine that anyone has surpassed me in this!

And Mary entered my life early. When I was born I was given Her name in baptism. Then I received Jesus for the first time. I left my town, my home and my family, and, in days consecrated to Mary, I re-

her. She has always been devoted to Mary so why should she then have the feeling that Mary is hiding somewhere deep in her soul? As we will see further on, this is an absolutely unique mystic experience with the Virgin Mary at its centre. For Mother Maria Candida, as for all good Christians, it is not simply a matter of believing in the dogma, but a matter of being willing to start an existential and spiritual quest for the mystery of Christ, which means unveiling the tangled love relationship between “the beloved of God” and the Almighty who has done “great things” in her (Luke 1.28). It is likely that, at the end of a long existence marked by her love for the Eucharist, the Holy Spirit decided to give Mother Maria Candida a very special gift, namely, the awareness that (as we will see) her fervent love for Jesus Host, at a mysterious depth, conceals the same motherly love of Mary for her Son Jesus.

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ceived many more graces.3 Everything has come to me from Mary, She escorted me when I came to the Carmelite convent, She tenderly embraced me like a Mother on the day I decided to wear Her holy dress.

Then, the following day, on the occasion of the first festivity dedicated to Her, She granted me an overwhelming quantity of light, love and communion with Jesus.4 Then She suddenly withdrew and I have not seen Her since. I have languished without my Mother, but She will come back. I do believe that. I am waiting for Her and I will go with Her!5 3

Mother Maria Candida left Ragusa on 24 September 1919, the day when the Madonna della Mercede, invoked as “liberator of slaves”, was being celebrated, and she saw in this coincidence a special sign of the intercession of Mary in that fundamental moment of her life when she would finally see the longed-for fulfilment of her wish.

4 Mother Maria Candida took the Carmelite veil on 16 April 1920, but it is not clear which Marian celebration she refers to here.

Nevertheless, the following month of May was for her a time of special mystic graces (cf. Salita: primi passi, op. cit. pp. 67, 72 and 75) 5 As we can see, Mother Maria Candida’s mystic experience concerning the mystery of Mary begins with the night of this trial (described by her as terrible), marked by a strong effort to understand and a certain lack of affection. Almost undergoing within herself the biblical experience of the trial concerning the mysterious and unintelligible face of God and His actions, Mother Maria Candida recalls moments in her life when Mary was close to her. Several events in her life can in fact be related to Mary’s protection. Her vocation to the Carmelite life and the many difficulties she had to face in order to finally enter the convent could not be explained without making specific reference to a special connection with Mary (cf. what she wrote in her general confession in Nella stanza del mio cuore, op. cit., pp. 74-76). Finally, it is worth noticing the interesting premonition of her own death. “I am waiting for Her and I will go with Her!” In fact, during her last agony, Mother Maria Candida felt the mysterious presence of Mary to whom she devoted her last cry, “Mary, Mary, help me!”

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The Eucharist gives me Mary and can there be Jesus without Mary? And in my anguish for not being able to love Her, when I have the Sacred Heart in my bosom, after Communion or at other times, I tell Mary, “I love You in His Heart, I offer You all of His love for me, in every moment of my life!” I would not want to love Her less than Jesus does. And to Jesus I say, “I love You with Mary’s Heart! I offer You all of Her love for me, in every moment of my life.” I would not want to love Him less than Mary does! In my Communions Mary is always with me, it is from Her hands that I want to receive Him, it is with Her Heart that I want to welcome Him, and I offer It to Jesus.

“Can You see what I’m bringing to You?” I say to Him. “The Heart of Mary! Come and rest in Her” And it is for Her that I pray the divine Spirit will come to me, and because of Mary He will! Jesus, who has come to me to make me one with Him and to intercede through me, should be grateful to Mary! Touching the most cherished Body of Christ I say, “This is the flesh of Mary.” I entreat Her to come to me with Her divine Son, and I believe She does.

But only once, during a celebration dedicated to Her, could I feel Her in a very special way. Another time, when I wasn’t even thinking of Her, She unexpectedly took me to Holy Communion in Her arms. My Mother Mary, though strict and always in hiding, You have not spared me the sufferings and the Cross in the days consecrated to You. And this, more than anything else, tells me of Your great motherly love.

Yes, I repeat to Mary, “Oh my Mother, I do believe in Your immense love for me.” Yes, I do believe in 195

it even if I cannot feel it, in the same way as I believe in the love of my Jesus and I also reaffirm my faith in His love. There are times when this is extremely difficult, as I am oppressed by my own misery.6 I want to be like Mary. I think of Her and what She would do in my place, and I try to imitate her virtue. I don’t always do it, and of course I don’t succeed. There was a wonderful time, when I was living with my family, when I tried to imitate Her. I still fall into a state of rapture at the thought of Her virtue and I can feel its sweetness. I want to be a miniature “Mary”, I want to be Mary for Jesus! It is also for reparation that I take Her Heart. I would like to be as tender and caring for Jesus Host as Mary is, and I have tried to take Her place next to Him. Once I read a wonderful biography which recounted how Mary had revealed herself to a soul, whom She asked to take Her place in Her relationship with Jesus Host.

6 This is an open confession dealing with the culminating moment of her trial. Someone who is not particularly in love with Mary would probably not notice this interior disposition. But Mother Maria Candida, who has loved Mary all her life, cannot explain this night which, in some way, is the night of her devotion to Mary. This is how St John of the Cross describes what God is doing in this particular moment of the mystic experience, “God teaches the soul secretly and instructs it in the perfection of love without its doing anything or understanding how this happens” (Dark Night of the Soul, II, 5.1). That this is an authentic spiritual purification, and not just a moment of weakness and depression, is clearly demonstrated by Mother Maria Candida’s constant attitude of prayer which culminates in an act of faith, “Oh my Mother, I do believe in Your immense love for me.” It is God who leads the purification but the soul has to cooperate with patience and faith, suffer “with constancy and perseverance, passing through these trials without growing discouraged or failing the Beloved” (op. cit., II, 21.5).

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I roughly remember that this is what She told her: “I took great care of my Son on earth and now I cannot do anything else for Jesus in Sacrament. I beg you, my daughter, to give some of your motherly love to my son, Jesus!” From this revelation, together with other revelations, a big religious family was founded and spread through France and Belgium.7 I then became eager to show Jesus Host the same tenderness His Mother would have shown. Oh Jesus made Host, so powerful, so rich, He is truly left to our care and kindness. What if He didn’t have us, and especially His priests! And I have been consumed by tender7

Mother Maria Candida here refers to the Blessed Mary of Jesus (1818-1878), founder of the Congregation of St Mary Reparatrix, whose biography she had read in 1908 and was so struck by it that at first she thought of entering her Congregation which is dedicated to the perpetual adoration of the Most Blessed Sacrament. Only after reading The Story of a Soul by St Thérèse of Lisieux did she decide to enter the Carmelite convent. The Blessed Mary of Jesus, whose secular name was Emilie d’Oultremont, was born in Wégimont, near Liège (Belgium) and had a special devotion to the Eucharist and the Virgin Mary from childhood. At the age of nineteen she married Baron d’Hooghvorst, they had four children and he died after only ten years of marriage. The mystic experience of the Blessed Mary of Jesus, to which also Mother Maria Candida refers, took place on 8 December 1854, the day when Pius IX promulgated the dogma of the Immaculate Conception of the Blessed Virgin Mary. Mary assigned Emilie d’Oultremont the task of founding a new religious family, addressing her with the words reported here by Mother Maria Candida, “I took great care of my Son on earth and now I cannot do anything else for Jesus in Sacrament. I beg you, my daughter, to give some of your motherly love to my son, Jesus!” This new charism of the Blessed Mary of Jesus was therefore born from an experience of physical maternity which turned into a spiritual maternity with love for the Eucharist at its centre. From this point of view, Mother Maria Candida had an almost identical inspiration, to love the Eucharist and let it be loved in the same way as Mary loved her Son.

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ness for my Jesus. How much kindness and care love urges me to show. I am surprised at myself, I am even moved… Finally everything becomes clear, finally I understand and I have found Mary! And it could not be otherwise. She has poured something (forgive me, my God, if I dare say this, but I do believe what I am saying), She has poured something into my heart, it doesn’t matter if it’s just a little, some of Her Heart for You! I have discovered the secret – so much love, so much passion for Jesus Host, for Jesus dwelling among us, came to me from Mary! It has something of Her own Heart.8 I stretch my hands towards the priests and beseech them, “Be good to my Jesus!” And my heart is consumed and melts with tenderness, my heart and blood are full of it, my soul is pervaded by it.

Oh sweetness, oh love, my eyes fill with tears, and 8 The night of Mother Maria Candida’s trial has finally been overcome and culminates in the cry of a soul inspired by the strength of the Holy Spirit, “I have discovered the secret – so much love, so much passion for Jesus Host, for Jesus dwelling among us, came to me from Mary! It has something of Her own Heart” (editors’ italics). The exclamation closely resembles that of St Thérèse of Lisieux when she discovered her vocation and mission in the Church. “In the heart of the Church, my Mother, I will be Love!” (Autobiographical Manuscript B, 3v). Starting from the interiority of spiritual maternity, which is a reflection of Mary’s maternity, Mother Maria Candida will devote herself completely to surrounding Jesus Sacrament with all tenderness and care. Moreover, despite the difficulty of adequately explaining the mysterious action of the Holy Spirit, Mother Maria Candida hints that this gift has in some way helped her to overcome some sort of scruple which must have tormented her. Was her devotion to the Eucharist excessive? In understanding, through spiritual inspiration, that such devotion “has something of Mary’s own heart”, she feels free to express it, thereby undergoing a true experience of faith.

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my lips repeat the same words, “Be good to my Jesus!” Oh what affection I feel for Him! Yes, I told my Mother that I wanted to take Her place on earth, close to Her sweet and meekest Son who has chosen to dwell among us! Have I been accepted? Surely She has loved me. That fragile Host, that most cherished Body, that immaculate Flesh, I would so much like to overwhelm them with motherly tenderness! I worry about Him, I need to make sure He is always touched by holy hands, received by pure souls, treated with awe, that the sacred fragments are not carelessly thrown away, and that the holy sacrifice is not performed in haste and with half ceremonies! Everything makes me suffer and languish. Jesus, I would like to be everywhere, I would like to ensure all this, I would like to surround You with the fervent tenderness of Mary’s Heart! I joined Her when I used to look after whatever pertains to Him and the holy altar and I was happy to wash the sacred linen cloth in the same way as Mary did for the Infant Jesus!

For whatever concerns Him and the service due to Him, I want always to be tender, caring, generous and most loving! Yes, tender, I melt with tenderness!

I am utterly shocked by the painful news I receive.

My Jesus, the holy Hosts are sometimes so mistreated. This Food of life is received almost against people’s will, almost with disgust and sacrilege. My God, my God, why do You hide the truth from me? The reality is worse than I can imagine! I have recently heard that so many fragments of consecrated Hosts have been mistreated and neglected. How painful it is! “Oh sacred Angels, always preserve them and 199

take care of them!” This is my wish, my prayer! We piously believe that “the Angels of the fragments” exist. I wish it were true! What we cannot do, do it Yourself, Mary. Make sure that the crumbs of the Holy Bread are not lost, inspire tender, most tender priests for Your Jesus. I know they exist and I thank my Lord for this!9 When the most sweet Host is in my heart, I sometimes feel the same tenderness as Mary did when She held Jesus in Her arms. I would like to protect Him from indifference and neglect, I would like to enshrine Him within my heart, to soothe Him, that most cherished Body, that most innocent and beneficial Flesh. Twice I happened to find Him hidden in the fragments of the Host, and twice I recognised Him and, kneeling down, I long adored Him! How easy it would have been not to notice, especially once, but with how much tenderness and promptness Mary made me fulfil my duty! Mary, my Mother, make me please Your Heart and allow me to be close to Jesus Host taking Your place here on earth.

Moreover, make me be like You in everything, oh my Mother. I wish I had a voice which could reach 9 Reaching this new awareness of her mission, Mother Maria Candida gives vent to an entirely feminine and motherly concern for the Eucharist. It is worth noting the language (blood, tears, tenderness, worry) which dramatically contrasts with the profanation which may be inflicted on the Eucharist by superficiality or, even worse, by true sacrilege. We must not forget that, according to St Teresa of Avila, at the summit of the journey there is the “Spiritual Marriage” which joins our nature to God’s in a kind of wedding, a “visceral” union, similar to the one the Virgin Mary experienced when she was carrying the Word made Flesh in her womb (cf. Interior Castle, VII,1,6).

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everyone, “Give your heart to Mary! Love, love, love this Mother of love and imitate Her. If you want to please Her, you must love Her Jesus Host, take Her place in the love for Jesus! Yes, love for Mary will give you love for Jesus.”10 Oh my Mother, listen to this, I love You, You are so beautiful!

In my relationship with Jesus Host I will do my best to resemble “Mary” in terms of respect, adoration, tenderness and love. I will never separate Jesus from Mary! I will make everyone love my Mother.

10 This exhortation of Mother Maria Candida wonderfully ends the mystic experience described. Love for Mary – she has experienced this herself – leads to a fervent love for Jesus. In fact the Christian soul, climbing up the well-known path of authentic love, rather than travelling along foreign roads, finds in Mary a wise mystagogue capable of introducing it to the mystery of God and His ways of salvation. The mystic experience highlights Mary’s superior life reduced to its basic elements represented by the presence of God, because Mary is the eschatological tabernacle of the Godwith-us dwelling in her (Luke 1.28), by her complete commitment into the hands of the Father through a caring and loving faith according to His Word (Luke 1.38), and by her freedom as daughter and bride deriving from the awareness of being loved by God and guided by the Spirit (Luke 1.28).

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