South Carolina Living February 2012

Are you at Risk?

5 deadly medical conditions 8 ways to prevent them SC Sc e n e February 2012

Hoppin’ good show

SC Sto r i e s

Back into the wild

Humor me

The creeping crud

THE MAGAZINE FOR COOPERATIVE MEMBERS Vol. 66 • No. 2 (ISSN 0047-486X, USPS 316-240) Read in more than 450,000 homes and businesses and published monthly except in December by The Electric Cooperatives of South Carolina, Inc. 808 Knox Abbott Drive Cayce, SC 29033 Tel: (803) 926-3 1 75 Fax: (803) 796-6064 Email: letters@scliving.coop EDITOR

February 2012 • Volume 66, Number 2

FEATURE

16 Are you at risk?

Our special health report explores the five deadliest medical conditions facing South Carolinians—and how we can beat them.

Keith Phillips FIELD EDITOR

Walter Allread PUBLICATION COORDINATOR

Pam Martin

ART DIRECTOR

Sharri Harris Wolfgang DESIGNER

Susan Collins

4 CO-OP CONNECTION Cooperative news

6 ON THE AGENDA

PRODUCTION

Andrew Chapman WEB EDITOR

Van O’Cain COPY EDITOR

Susan Scott Soyars Contributors

Becky Billingsley, Stacey Studley Collins, Mike Couick, Jim Dulley, Jennifer Berry Hawes, Hastings Hensel, Carrie B. Hirsch, Jan A. Igoe, Charles Joyner, Kiley Kellermeyer, Shandi Stevenson, S. Cory Tanner Publisher

ADVERTISING MANAGERS

Tel: (800) 984-0887 Dan Covell Email: dan@scliving.coop Keegan Covell Email: keegan@scliving.coop National Representation

National Country Market Tel: (800) NCM-1181 Paid advertisements are not endorsements by any electric cooperative or this publication.

If you encounter a difficulty with an advertisement, inform the Editor.

ADDRESS CHANGES: Please send

to your local co-op. Postmaster: Send Form 3579 to Address Change, c/o the address above.

Periodicals postage paid at Columbia, S.C., and additional mailing offices. © COPYRIGHT 201 2. The Electric Cooperatives of South Carolina, Inc. No portion of South Carolina Living may be reproduced without permission of the Editor.

STORIES

21 Following the flood

10 Listening to Main Street

GARDENER

When Congress debates energy 26 Pruning for structure policy, our representatives need to think about the impact legislation will have on everyday South Carolinians.

ENERGY Q&A

12 When lightning strikes

Whole-house surge suppressors offer protection for sensitive electronics.

SMART CHOICE

14 Clever brewing

Ten high-tech machines to get your morning cup of joe brewed just the way you like it.

February is a great month to make sure young trees grow tall, strong and healthy.

TRAVELS

28 Total immersion

The S.C. Aquarium explores the state’s rich biodiversity— above and below the water.

RECIPE

30 Valentine’s Day delights

Crock-Pot barbecue sandwiches Lou Lou’s cheeseburger muffins Super blue cheese dressing Great Grandmother’s cookie crust cake CHEF’S CHOICE

Ambergre Sloan is taking her all-natural, guilt-free snacks to the streets of Charleston.

HUMOR ME

38 ’Tis the season of the crud

Enjoy this cautionary tale about the dangers of kissing third cousins and wearing inappropriate head gear to the mall.

SC SC e n e February 2012

Hoppin’ good show

SC Sto r i e S

Back into the wild

Humor me

The creeping crud

Cover photo by Patrick Heagney/iStock.

34 MARKETPLACE 36 SC EVENTS

28

© South Carolina Aquarium

Are you At risk?

5 deadly medical conditions 8 ways to prevent them

Member of the NCM network of publications, reaching more than 7 million homes and businesses

22

32 Hot Diggity Doughnuts

SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING is brought to you by your member-owned, taxpaying, not-for-profit electric cooperative to inform you about your cooperative, wise energy use and the faces and places that identify the Palmetto State. Electric cooperatives are South Carolina’s — and America’s — largest utility network.

Printed on recycled paper

16

An Upstate college professor Watch history come alive at three discovers the wild side of re-enactment programs featuring South Carolina on an 11-day battles from the Civil War and the canoe trip from Spartanburg American Revolution. Plus: Women to the Atlantic Ocean. returning to college are eligible for SCENE a $2,500 scholarship from South 22 One giant leap Carolina’s electric cooperatives.

A first-time trainer enters the fray of Springfield’s annual POWER USER Governor’s Frog Jump Competition.

DIALOGUE

Lou Green

SC LIFE

On the Agenda For a listing p m co lete s, see of Event 6 page 3

TOP PICK FOR KIDS

Highlights

FEBRUARY 24–26, MARCH 3–4

The Blue and the Gray

FEBRUARY 24–25

Francis Marion Living History Encampment

You studied the Revolutionary War heroics of Gen. Francis “Swamp Fox” Marion in history class, but this Feb. 24 you can literally walk in the footsteps of the Patriot leader as he goes about organizing a guerrilla attack on British troops in the woods of Clarendon County. Friday night lantern walks led by re-enactors kick off the festivities at the Francis Marion Living History Encampment. The weekend is filled with plenty of participatory events for kids of all ages, so this is one history lesson the whole family can enjoy. Bonus: Admission and parking are free.

For details, visit francismarioncountry.com or call (803) 478-2645.

Battle for Broxton Bridge

Batt le of Aike n

For details, visit battleofaiken.org or call (706) 830-0930; broxtonbridge.com or call (800) 437-4868.

francismarioncountry.com

In the early days of 1865, Union troops under the command of Gen. William T. Sherman crossed the Savannah River into South Carolina intent on capturing Columbia and hastening the end of the Civil War. They were met by equally determined Confederate troops and two of the major skirmishes that took place are re-enacted on an annual basis. Now in its 17th year, the Battle of Aiken (February 24–26) is one of the state’s biggest— and loudest—living history events. While downtown Aiken was the scene of the actual battle, the modern staging takes place in a 7-acre field complete with cavalry, artillery and infantry soldiers engaged in mock combat.

Not far away in Ehrhardt, the Battle for Broxton Bridge (March 2–4) takes place on the grounds of the Broxton Bridge Hunting Plantation. This living history event recreates the battles along the Salkehatchie River that were the last resistance the Union army met before reaching Columbia.

FEBRUARY 16–18

BI-LO Myrtle Beach Marathon

Organizers expect 3,000 elite runners to beat feet to Myrtle Beach this month for the BI-LO Myrtle Beach Marathon. The 26.2-mile race is a qualifier for the Boston Marathon, so the competition will be fierce as top athletes try to break the course record of 2:28:33 set in 2008 by Garick Hill of Winston-Salem, N.C. For runners who aren’t up to the full distance there is also a half marathon, a 5k run and a 1-mile family fun run. And for the rest of us, there’s a really cool after-race party at House of Blues.

For details, visit mbmarathon.com or call (843) 293-7223.

MARCH 1–4, 5–10

Meet some of the state’s top gourmet chefs and sample their best dishes at two tasty spring festivals. The foodie fun starts with the Charleston Food & Wine Festival (March 1–4), which includes everything from soul food to charcuterie, with craft beer dinners and a seminar by top female chefs and authors thrown in for good measure. The state’s culinary focus then shifts to the Hilton Head Island Wine & Food Festival (March 5–10) for an international wine competition, Great Chefs of the South wine dinners, cooking demonstrations and a bartender’s challenge. Cheers!

For details, visit charlestonfoodandwine.com or call (843) 727-9998; hiltonheadwineandfood.com or call (843) 686-4944.

6

SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

Hilton Head island Wine and Food Festival

Eat, Drink and Be Merry

Email COMMENTS, QUESTIONS AND Story suggestions TO LETTERS@SCLIVING.COOP

Honoring the ‘Greatest Generation’ Florence monument promises to be a real ‘heart grabber’ During World War II,

Walter Allread

—Walter Allread

Attention all World War II veterans: Honor Flight of South Carolina and your local electric cooperative want to reward your service by flying you to Washington, D.C., to see the National World War II Memorial. Seats for the co-op-sponsored Honor Flight— scheduled for April 11—are still available, but filling up fast.

Our mission is to make sure every eligible World War II veteran has the opportunity to experience this special tribute. Are you a World War II veteran? Do you know a hero of the “Greatest Generation” who deserves to be honored? If so, apply today. Call Betsy Hix at (803) 739-3024 for more information or fill out the online application form at SCLiving.coop. Applications are due by March 1.

Get More For more details on the co-op-sponsored Honor Flight, plus profiles of World War II veterans from across South Carolina, visit scliving.coop/veterans.aspx Learn more about Honor Flight of South Carolina and how you can help support future trips for veterans at honorflightsc.com

COURTESY BROWN MEMORIALS

Dave Phillips served as U.S. Navy radio operator, helped support ground troops fighting at Anzio and volunteered for duty on a security detail guarding U.S. President Franklin Roosevelt and British Prime Minister Winston Churchill. Today, at age 86, he has a new mission—honoring his Dave Phillips is spearheading a drive fellow veterans. to erect a World War II monument in Phillips is part of a comFlorence Veterans Park. mission seeking $220,000 in donations to build a new World War II monument on the grounds of Florence Veterans Park as a tribute to those who “won our freedom in the largest military event in history.” When completed, the monument will be an educational experience for visitors—and an emotional one. “It will be a heart grabber,” says Phillips, a Pee Dee Electric Cooperative member.

The preliminary design, drafted by Brown Memorials of Florence, calls for a spiraling walkway to lead visitors to a 14-foot-tall column, capped by a 20-inch, black granite globe. Historical panels along the path will describe World War II milestones, from the 1941 attack on Pearl Harbor to D-Day to the Japanese surrender aboard the USS Missouri in 1945.

The panels, written with the help of history professors at Francis Marion University, will ensure visiting school groups understand the sacrifices veterans made during the conflict.

“You could walk through and write a pretty good paper on World War II,” Phillips says.

For more information, or to make a donation, contact the City of Florence Parks and Beautification Department at (843) 665-3253.

Join the co-op Honor Flight

An artist’s rendering of the proposed World War II monument in the Florence Veterans Park. The 14-foot sculpture will be topped by a 20-inch diameter globe designating the European and Pacific Theaters of the war.

Panels like the sample above will tell the story of key events in World War II. scliving.coop | February 2012 | SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING

7

On the Agenda S.C.RAMBLE!

Correction & Clarification

By Charles Joyner, See Answer ON Page 35

T

A

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C

Backing up our story

Domi-No.s A

U

Y

R

E

L

T

2

2

C

C 2

R

U

R

A

R

L

E

L

E

C

2 T

R

I

C

Each letter in these multiplication problems stands for a digit. Given C=2, can you replace the missing digits to find the value of RURAL ELECTRIC? Repeated letters stand for repeated digits.

In the interest of scientific accuracy, I need to point out an error in an otherwise excellent article about gator hunting (“On the hunt for gators,” January 2012).

In the last sentence in the first paragraph on top of page 20, the correct word for the scales on an alligator’s back is scutes, not scoots. Incidentally, under each of the scutes is a small, pyramidal shaped piece of bone, making the alligator truly an armored reptile.

—Robert W. Gooding, Greenwood

Readers vent

The “Energy Q&A” item on portable heat pumps in the January issue failed to mention that these units are limited by the fact that they must be vented to the outdoors through a window. We apologize for any confusion. We would also like to remind our readers that mention of a product in the “Energy Q&A” column is for illustration purposes only, and does not imply endorsement by South Carolina Living or any electric cooperative. —Ed.

Find us on the Web

Air is drawn into your home from low areas, so inspect your foundation for potential air-infiltration points.

Fixing these leaks makes a bigger impact on your electric bill than sealing doors and windows!

Caulk all cracks and gaps around your home including spaces around wires for telephone, electrical, cable, and gas lines, water spigots, and dryer vents. Find more ways to save at TogetherWeSave.com.

Source: Touchstone Energy Cooperatives

8

Visit SCLiving.coop this month to get the best of everything from this and past issues of South Carolina Living, including: Humor Me. Need a reason to smile? You’ll find a link to some of Jan Igoe’s funniest “Humor Me” columns under the Opinion tab. Warning: We won’t be held responsible if you fall off your chair laughing.

Recipes. Want to share this month’s recipe for Lou Lou’s Cheeseburger Muffins or Great Grandmother’s Cookie Crust Cake (see page 30)? Now you can. Click on the Food tab for a digest of recent “Recipe” columns.

Use the buttons on the page to print a recipe, email it to your best friend or share it with the world via Facebook, Twitter or Google+.

Bonus: Each page also includes the Submit a Recipe link, which puts you one step closer to earning a $10 BI-LO gift card.

S.C. Stories. Revisit some of the fascinating South Carolinians we’ve profiled in the “S.C. Stories” column over the past year. You’ll find them hanging out under the SC Life tab.

Find us on Facebook “Like” us on Facebook if you love living in South Carolina as much as we do. Join the conversation, share your ideas and post your favorite photos and videos as we celebrate all that’s good about the Palmetto State at facebook.com/SouthCarolinaLiving.

Write SCL Letters to the editor We love hearing from our readers. Tell us what you think about this issue, send us story suggestions or just let us know what’s on your mind by writing to Letters, South Carolina Living, 808 Knox Abbott Drive, Cayce, SC 29033. You can also email us at letters@scliving.coop or send a note by fax to (803) 796-6064. All letters received are subject to editing before publication.

SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

GONE FISHIN’ The Vektor Fish & Game Forecast provides feeding and migration times.

Major periods can bracket the peak by an hour. Minor peaks, ½ hour before and after.

Minor

AM Major

Minor

PM Major

February

17 9:46 5:01 2:31 10:01 18 10:31 5:16 3:31 10:46 19 11:01 5:46 4:31 11:16 20 11:31 6:01 5:01 11:46 21 — 6:31 12:01 5:46 22 6:46 12:16 12:46 6:31 23 7:01 12:46 7:01 1:16 24 7:16 1:16 7:46 1:46 25 1:31 7:46 8:31 2:16 26 1:46 8:01 9:16 2:46 27 2:01 8:16 10:31 3:46 28 2:16 8:31 — 4:46 29 — 9:01 — 6:16

March

1 — 2 9:01 3 9:46 4 10:16 5 10:46 6 11:16 7 11:46 8 6:16 9 12:31 10 1:16 11 1:46 12 2:31 13 3:01 14 1:16 15 10:46 16 9:01

9:46 4:31 4:31 4:46 5:01 5:31 5:46 12:01 6:31 7:01 7:31 8:01 8:31 9:16 3:01 3:46

— 7:46 12:31 8:46 2:16 9:31 3:16 10:16 4:16 10:46 5:01 11:31 — 5:46 6:31 12:16 7:31 1:01 8:16 1:46 9:31 2:31 11:01 3:31 — 4:31 — 6:01 — 7:46 1:01 8:46

CUSTOM HOMES ON YOUR LOT • OUR PLAN OR YOURS

Build it the MAdiSON WAy WIRE offers $2,500 scholarship for women

Applications are being taken for a $2,500 scholarship for women awarded annually by WIRE, a community service organization affiliated with electric co-ops in South Carolina.

The WIRE Opportunity Scholarship is awarded to a woman who may not have been able to attend college when she graduated from high school, but now wants to further her education.

WIRE (Women Involved in Rural Electrification) awards the scholarship based on financial need and personal goals.

Applicants must: l Be a member of a South Carolina electric co-op l Have graduated from high school or earned her GED at least 10 years ago l Be accepted into an accredited S.C. college or university, and l Demonstrate financial need and personal goals Women who have previously obtained a four-year college degree are not eligible. Applicants may have previously earned a two-year degree or some college credits. The scholarship, which can be used for the fall 2012 or spring 2013 semesters, will be paid jointly to the winner and her college of choice.

Applications are available at your local electric cooperative or online at SCLiving.coop. The deadline to apply is June 1. Mail or fax the application to: WIRE Scholarship Committee Attention: Christy Overstreet Marlboro Electric Cooperative, Inc. P.O. Box 1057 Bennettsville, SC 29512 Fax (843) 479-8990

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scliving.coop | February 2012 | SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING

9

Dialogue

Listening to Main Street When debating energy policy, Congress needs to consider how legislation affects rural South Carolinians Whether you’re a Republican or a Democrat,

Mike Couick

President and CEO, The Electric Cooperatives of South Carolina

10

and regardless of which candidate you back in the upcoming presidential election, there is an important issue on the horizon that should concern every member of a South Carolina electric cooperative.

When the dust settles on the 2012 political season, Congress will almost certainly be called upon to craft a bold, new energy policy for our nation, and in the process, reshape an electric power industry already facing seismic shifts in the way it does business. Growing demand for electricity, deferred major infrastructure investments, costly regulatory issues and an increasingly competitive global marketplace for fuels have all fundamentally altered the cost of providing power to consumers.

The energy policy debate will be driven by an array of environmental, financial and national security concerns, and our elected representatives will face a monumental task in balancing competing political agendas without hampering delivery of the reliable, affordable electricity that fuels our economy.

Unfortunately, major policy shifts that originate in Washington, D.C., have a way of being unduly influenced by the well-financed ­lobbyists of K Street, the avenue in our nation’s capital that is home to advocacy firms for hire.

We believe that when debating an issue this important, Congress desperately needs to hear the voices of people who live on Main Street, in small towns and on the dirt roads of rural America.

In anticipation of the legislative battles to come, South Carolina’s not-for-profit electric cooperatives are working together to protect the interests of you, our member-owners.

We’ve already been in contact with lawmakers

SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

and their staffs with a simple message: Before you take action, consult with us for input and dialogue so you can understand the bottomline impact your decisions will have on South Carolina consumers. In return, we’ll provide the unvarnished data and studies lawmakers need to sort out these weighty policy decisions.

For many years, South Carolina’s electric cooperatives have been national leaders in energyefficiency programs. In partnership with Santee Cooper, the state-owned utility that supplies most of the electricity distributed by your cooperative, we’ve been pioneers in developing affordable renewable energy sources like landfill gas and biomass with our Green Power program. We’ve also worked with Santee Cooper to educate future consumers on the potential of renewable energy by creating 19 Green Power Solar Schools across the state, and we’ve helped fund the Palmetto Wind Project, exploring the possibilities of using offshore windmills to produce electricity.

While we have made remarkable progress on these fronts, our state’s economy is still predominantly fueled by conventional fossil energy sources, primarily coal. Transitioning away from fossil fuels will take time, massive financial investments and a federal regulatory climate that is consistent and rational. If we wish for our state and nation to prosper, Congress has to get these issues right—the first time.

As readers of this column may recall, my grandfather was a carpenter and he built his reputation on the tried-and-true principle of “measure twice, cut once.” By helping Congress “measure twice” when evaluating energy policy, your electric cooperatives will continue to build a strong economic foundation for our state and our nation.

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EnergyQ&A

BY jim Dulley

When lightning strikes Whole-house surge suppressors protect gadgets and appliances from unexpected power spikes

Maxivolt

Although rare, electrical surges​—​usually caused by lightning strikes—can damage more than sensitive home electronics like computers, game consoles, stereos and home entertainment systems. They can also fry basic household appliances. Nearly every electric item in a modern home, right down to kitchen ranges, dishwashers, vacuum cleaners, air conditioners and fans, has components that can be damaged by a sudden spike of Whole-house surge suppressors can be either integrated into the circuit current. breaker panel or mounted by the Whole-house surge suppressors are the best option for electric meter. protecting your home electronics and wiring from the damage created by lightning strikes, and there are several clamping voltage. This is the voltage that is required for the types from which to choose. Some mount on the circuit “floodgate” to open, and here a lower number is usually breaker panel indoors or are built into a circuit breaker, better. In the event of a large surge of power, the MOVs while others are designed to mount at the base of the elecwill likely burn out as they act to protect your electrontric meter. Obviously, installing these devices should be ics. Look for models that have an indicator light to let you left to a professional electrician. Call your electric cooperaknow when the unit needs to be replaced. tive for advice on the best type of surge protector for your One word of caution: The voltage and current spikes home as well as recommended professionals who can do from a single lightning strike are enormous, and there are the job safely and efficiently. Some cooperatives even sell typically many strikes during a storm. If your house experithe devices and will install the unit for you. ences a direct hit by lightning, even the best surge suppresProperly installed, whole-house surge suppressors work sor may be overwhelmed. by diverting power spikes before the excess current gets Whenever a storm is forecast and you begin to hear to your internal wiring. To do this, they use metal oxide thunder in the distance, unplug as many of your elecvaristors (MOVs) that dissipate the excess current. You can tronic devices as possible. Just switching them off may conceptualize them as a floodgate. At normal voltages, the not be adequate protection—a huge voltage surge can arc gate is closed, preventing leaks. But if the voltage gets across an open switch and still fry the GetMore too high, the gate opens, electronic components in an expensive allowing the excess current device. Don’t forget to unhook other The following companies offer efficient surge to pass to ground, protectexternal lines like satellite, cable, phone suppressors: ing the devices and appliand network connections. They can serve Eaton, (800) 386-1911, eaton.com ances in your home. as a path for a surge to enter a sensitive Emerson Network Power, (800) 288-6169, The ability of an MOV device, and they bypass the circuits proemersonnetworkpower.com to dissipate a power spike tected by surge suppressors installed on Intermatic, (800) 391-4555, intermatic.com is measured in joules, and the power line. the higher the rating, the Maxivolt, (800) 583-04773, Send questions to Energy Q&A, South Carolina serioussurgeprotection.com more protection it offers.

Living, 808 Knox Abbott Drive, Cayce, SC Another number to look for 29033, email energyqa@scliving.coop or fax Meter-Treater, (800) 638-3788, metertreater.com (803) 739-3041. when comparing devices is

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SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

Meter-treater

Q A

We have many electronic gadgets in our house, and I am concerned about a voltage surge ruining them. How can I protect these sensitive devices?

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scliving.coop | February 2012 | SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING

13

SmartChoice

By Becky BILLINGSLEY

When cold winter winds blow, a hot cup of java warms coffee lovers to the core.

According to the National Coffee Association, the vast majority of coffee drinkers—86 percent—brew at home, and single-serve pod systems and personal espresso machines are growing in popularity. Here’s a look at products available to turn your kitchen into a gourmet coffee shop.

Clever brewing SINGLE SERVINGS Pick a Flavor Sure, the single-serve Keurig Platinum Brewing System will make your morning cup of joe, but it also brews up 200 different hot beverages. The company’s single-portion K Cups offer varieties in coffee brands, strengths and flavors, as well as hot chocolate, apple cider and dozens of teas.

The machine can be programmed to brew 4- to 12-ounce cups, and it has an energy-saving mode. $180. (866) 901-2739; keurig.com.

Hot or Cold Another system utilizing K Cups is the Breville BKC700XL Gourmet Single Serve Coffeemaker. The unit has five brew strengths and a reservoir that will hold enough water to make up to 10 cups. Its most unique feature is the iced beverage function that delivers a concentrated shot of coffee or tea.

Just add ice, water, milk and/or sweeteners and enjoy. $240. (800) 201-7575; amazon.com.

Coffee on Call Like any worthy kitchen butler, the Nescafé Dolce Gusto Creativa (shown above) memorizes the way you take your coffee. This single-cup brew system uses flavor capsules to create hot and cold drinks, and the machine is programmable so a fresh cup is ready precisely when you want it. Bonus: With Thermoblock technology, it heats fresh water in less than one minute. $200. (800) 853-7162; dolcegustostore.com.

WHOLE BEAN MACHINES Dual Function Sometimes you want a quick shot of espresso, and other times only a frothy latte or cappuccino will do. The DeLonghi Pump Espresso/Cappuccino Maker can provide both via a patented filter using pods or freshly ground beans. A removable water tank and drip tray make for easy cleaning, while two separate thermostats allow for different beverages to be brewed with precision. $100.

(877) 882-8604; shopdelonghi.com.

Fingerprint Brewing The Philips Saeco Xelsis Digital ID coffee machine is a luxurious and high-tech addition to the kitchen of any serious coffee lover. It reads fingerprints to dispense personal beverage preferences for up to six people. It makes espresso, cappuccino and macchiato using whole beans or ground coffee, and can dispense two cups simultaneously. A cleaning cycle de-scales components to maintain flavor quality and machine performance. $3,200. (800) 421-1223; shopsaeco.com.

Daily Grind Coffee drinkers who insist on freshly ground beans will love the Burr Grind & Brew Thermal 12-cup automatic coffeemaker. Fill the hopper with up to eight ounces of whole beans, choose a brew strength and the number of cups desired (2 to 12), and stand back. In minutes the thermal carafe will contain fresh java nectar— no muss, no fuss. $200.

(800) 211-9604; cuisinart.com.

Bar None Anyone can be a barista with the Tassimo T20 Home Brewing System by Bosch. The system uses T Discs filled with coffee, espresso, tea leaves or milk creamer, and the machine reads the discs’ bar codes to adjust pressure, temperature, water and brewing time to deliver coffee shop-quality hot beverages. $100. (877) 834-7271; tassimodirect.com.

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SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

SPEEDY SERVICE

All Steamed Up Lattes and cappuccinos are ready to drink in less than five minutes with the Capresso 4-Cup Espresso & Cappuccino Machine. A boiler cap with a built-in safety valve and a thumb guard help protect users from burns. $60. (800) 767-3554; capresso.com.

In Hot Water Coffee lovers can enjoy the Cuisinart Coffee Plus for its heater plate with three temperature settings and built-in filters that remove water impurities, while those who prefer tea or hot chocolate can delight in having hot water available any time from an independent reservoir.

The hot-water feature is also handy for quick preparation of instant soups, oatmeal and more. $100. (800) 211-9604; cuisinart.com.

Personal Grind Can’t decide between a cup of coffee or an espresso drink? With the Krups XP2280 Precise Tamp Espresso/Cappuccino/Coffee Machine you can have both. On the espresso side, a programmable tamp system provides consistent shots every time. $300. (800) 462-3966; bedbathandbeyond.com.

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Special Health Report

Healthier lifestyles are the key to preventing five of South Carolina’s deadliest medical conditions

Bad news, South Carolina: Your health report is back and the results aren’t pretty.

We’re not going to sugarcoat it for you, because diabetes and obesity run rampant through the Palmetto State. So do cardiovascular disease, respiratory disease, stroke and cancer—all at rates

BY STACEY STUDLEY COLLINS higher than the national average. In fact, we rank a disappointing 45th in the list of healthy states according to America’s Health Rankings, a state-by-state comparison compiled annually by United Health Foundation based on the prevalence of more than 30 medical conditions.

Poor lifestyle choices are often to blame. As a state, we tend to eat the wrong foods, smoke too much, we don’t get enough exercise, and we don’t manage our stress levels. But in that, there is a silver lining. Poor habits can be changed (see: “Eight steps to better health,” page 18).

Doctors say that if we take better care of ourselves, we can go a long way toward preventing these five chronic diseases that kill tens of thousands of South Carolinians every year.

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SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

Cancer

index, obesity and physical inactivity,” she says. “If we can The term cancer is used to describe the effectively promote healthy behaviors, we should be able uncontrolled growth and spread of abnormal to reduce the incidence of cancer in our state.” cells. Although the survival rate for cancer has improved The number one way to lower your cancer risk? Stop during the past decade, more than 500,000 people in smoking. Lung cancer, often preventable, accounts for 30 the United States and 23,000 in South Carolina die percent of all cancer-related deaths, according to the South from some form of cancer each year. According to the Carolina Cancer Alliance. The American Cancer Society S.C. Department of Health and Environmental Control reports that people who stop smoking before age of 50 cut (DHEC), cancer is one of the highest disease-related their risk of dying in the next 15 years in half. mortality risks in the Palmetto State.

Excluding skin cancer, Herrmann says that While annual screenings like colonoscopies the risk of prostate cancer, the most common and mammograms allow for early detection and form among men, and breast cancer, the most treatment of cancers, healthy lifestyle choices are common form among women, can be reduced the best way to prevent cancer, says Dr. Virginia with a healthy diet, regular exercise and by Herrmann, a surgical oncologist with the reducing stress.

Medical University of South Carolina’s Hollings Maintaining a healthy weight is especially Cancer Center and medical director of the Breast important for women. “Those who are obese, Health Center at Hilton Head Hospital.

Dr. Virginia Herrmann: or who have an elevated Body Mass Index “The American Cancer Society estimates that “We should be able to a third of all cancer-related deaths can be attribreduce the incidence of (BMI), are more likely to develop breast cancer,” she says. Normal BMI for women is between uted to poor eating habits, increased body mass cancer in our state.”

scliving.coop | February 2012 | SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING

17

Special Health Report

18.5 and 24.9. Anything over 25 is considered overweight, and over 30 is obese. The risk of developing breast cancer, especially in post-menopausal women, is higher if the BMI is above 25 and significantly higher if over 30. “Women with a BMI over 30 are more likely to die from the disease,” Herrmann says.

Excessive alcohol intake is also associated with the development of a number of cancers, including cancer of the breast, mouth, throat and esophagus, and the risk is directly related to the amount of alcohol you drink.

Herrmann recommends women limit themselves to one drink per day, men no more than two.

Cardiovascular disease

Photo by Sarah Welliver, reprinted with permission of The (Hilton Head) Island Packet

Cardiovascular disease refers to conditions that damage the heart or blood vessels. The most common form, atherosclerosis, is characterized by a buildup of fatty plaques that causes hardening of the arterial walls over time. According to the American Heart Association (AHA), it is the leading cause of disease-related death in the world.

“Most people are asymptomatic and some have symptoms attached to other problems, such as indigestion” says Dr. David Kastl, a thoracic surgeon at Hilton Head Regional Medical Center, making cardiac screening the best way to

Although South Carolina’s top five killers are most often diagnosed in people over the age of 55, all ages should take heed. The underlying physiological changes may begin one or two decades before the first symptoms manifest. People in their mid 30s and 40s should realize that the choices they make today will have substantial ramifications on their quality of life down the road. Here are eight steps you can take today to improve your health and reduce your risk:

1

Stop smoking. Although smoking is a major risk

factor for heart disease, lung cancer and respiratory illnesses like COPD, many smokers find it hard to quit.

For help kicking the tobacco habit, call the S.C. Tobacco Quitline (800-QUIT-NOW or 800-784-8669), a service sponsored

by DHEC. It’s open from 8 a.m. to 3 a.m. seven days a week.

Callers without health insurance who enroll in Quitline services may be eligible to receive free nicotine gum or patches. For more information visit scdhec.gov/quitforkeeps.

Control your blood pressure. Ask your doctor for a blood pressure measurement at least every two years. He or she may recommend more frequent measurements if your blood pressure is higher than normal or if you have a history of heart disease. Optimal blood pressure is below 120 systolic and 80 diastolic.

2

Scott Huska’s spontaneous decision to volunteer for a new diagnostic procedure offered by Hilton Head Regional Medical Center led to discovery of a “widow maker” arterial blockage and life-saving bypass surgery.

spot problems before they become life-threatening. That was certainly the case for one of his patients, Scott Huska, a hospital employee who had no suspicion that anything was wrong until he volunteered to undergo a calcium scoring test, a new diagnostic procedure. “I asked how long it would take and they told me about 15 minutes, so I thought, ‘Sure, why not,’” Huska says.

It proved to be a life-saving choice.

Elevated blood calcium is one indicator of ­cardiovascular disease and based on Huska’s results, his cardiologist ordered more screening and discovered a “widow maker,” an arterial blockage so severe that it could cause a fatal 18

Steps to better health

SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

3

Check your cholesterol. Ask your doctor

for a baseline cholesterol test when you’re in your 20s and retest at least every five years. Pay close attention to the low-density lipoprotein (LDL) reading. LDL is commonly called the “bad” cholesterol, because it can clog arteries and increase your risk for heart disease. Anything above 130 milligrams per deciliter (mg/dl) is considered high in a healthy person. If you have other risk factors for heart disease, your target LDL is below 100 mg/dl, and if you’re at very high risk of heart disease—if you’ve already had a heart attack or have diabetes, for example— your target LDL level is below 70 mg/dl.

Your doctor will also examine the levels of triglycerides in your bloodstream. Triglycerides are another type of fat that can also increase your risk of heart disease. If you regularly eat more calories than you burn, particularly “easy” calories like carbohydrates and fats, you may have high triglycerides. Any reading greater than 150 mg/dl is considered high.

heart attack at any time. Within 24 hours, Huska had bypass surgery.

Certain risk factors for heart disease cannot be avoided.

The condition is most common in men over the age of 55 and affects African-Americans at much higher rates than whites. The good news is that many other important risk factors, like obesity, high cholesterol and high blood pressure are within your control and can substantially reduce the likelihood of an attack.

“Even with improved screenings, we still encourage patients to exercise and eat healthy,” Kastl says.

4

Keep diabetes under control. If you have

diabetes, maintaining a healthy weight together with tight blood sugar control can help slow progression of the disease and reduce the risk of heart disease, too. Several nonprofit groups, including the South Carolina Diabetes Prevention and Control Program and the Diabetes Initiative of South Carolina are working together to promote diabetes prevention. A list of the participating coalitions can be found on DHEC’s website at scdhec.gov/​​health/​chcdp/​diabetes/partners.

Get moving. Exercise is one of the best preventative measures against illness, period. It helps you achieve and maintain a healthy weight, and it also helps control diabetes, cholesterol and blood pressure. It may also lower the risk of certain types of cancer. With your doctor’s approval, aim for 30 to 60 minutes of physical activity most days of the week. If you can’t make time for one 30- to 60-minute exercise session, you can still benefit from several 10-minute sessions.

5

Eat healthy foods. A diet based on fruits, vegetables and whole grains—and one that is low in saturated fat, cholesterol and sodium—can help you control your weight, blood pressure and cholesterol.

6 7

Avoid “belly fat.” Being overweight increases

8

Combat chronic stress. Chronic stress is a

your risk of heart disease. However, weight loss is especially important for people who have large waist measurements—more than 40 inches for men and more than 35 inches for women—because people with this body shape are more likely to develop diabetes and heart disease. particular kind of stress that the body is not built to handle. It is often caused by our contemporary lifestyle, such as high-pressure jobs, financial anxiety, and loneliness or bad marriages. There are a wide range of stress management techniques available, from breathing exercises to music therapy and yoga. Find one that works for you and use it.

In addition to these healthy lifestyle changes, get regular medical checkups. Early detection and treatment of diseases can set the stage for a lifetime of better health.

—Stacey Studley Collins

Stroke

The term Sun Belt is often used to describe the southern tier of the United States, including South Carolina. It’s also known as the Stroke Belt, and DHEC reports that the coastal and Pee Dee regions of South Carolina have stroke rates so high that they’re known as the Stroke Buckle.

“Most strokes are caused by a blocked artery, which reduces blood flow to the brain. A smaller percentage of strokes result from a ruptured artery, usually in the setting of hypertension,” says Dr. James L. Bumgartner, a neurologist with Roper St. Francis Hospital in Charleston. Stroke is another leading cause of mortality in South Carolina, and nationwide, someone has a stroke every 40 seconds.

A stroke-related fatality occurs every three to four minutes and strokes are a leading cause of serious, long-term ­disability in adults.

According to Bumgartner, strokes bear a strong correlation to cardiovascular disease. Not surprisingly, the same preventative measures, such as controlling high cholesterol and high blood pressure, not smoking, eating right, exercising and weight control all apply. He notes, however, that strokes sometimes strike people with no signs of arterial impairment elsewhere in their bodies. That’s why knowing symptoms is so important.

Stroke symptoms include a sudden onset of numbness or weakness in the face, arm or leg; confusion; trouble speaking or understanding; trouble seeing in one or both eyes; dizziness and loss of balance; or severe headache with no known cause. If you suspect someone is having a stroke, American Stroke Association recommends that you act F.A.S.T. F. Facial expression. Ask the person to smile. Does one side of the face drop?

A. Arms. Ask the person to raise both arms. Does one arm drift downward?

S. Slurred speech. Ask the person to repeat a simple sentence. Are the words slurred? Can he or she repeat the sentence correctly?

T. Time is critical. If the person shows any of these symptoms, call 911 or get to the hospital immediately. Brain cells are dying. ll scliving.coop | February 2012 | SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING

19

Special Health Report

Palmetto State health by the numbers

32

Percentage of adults who are obese, or roughly 1,134,000 people. Obesity rates have more than doubled in South Carolina since 1990 and now we rank third on the list of fattest states.

21

Percentage of adults who smoke, or approximately 744,000 people. While the prevalence of smoking has steadily declined in recent years, our rate is still higher than the national average. In a 2009 report, DHEC called smoking “the leading preventable cause of death and disease in South Carolina,” and estimated the direct cost of treating smoking-related illness at $1 billion.

41.8 & 32.6

Percentage of adults diagnosed with high cholesterol and high blood pressure, respectively. Both conditions contribute to heart disease and strokes.

10.7

Percentage of adults with diabetes. America’s Health Rankings puts the number of diagnosed cases at 379,000, but state health officials estimate an additional 300,000 South Carolinians have the condition and don’t know it.

Source: America’s Health Rankings

Respiratory disease

Respiratory disease is a broad category that includes asthma, influenza and pneumonia, but the biggest killer is chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD)—a progressive illness that causes inflammation, loss of elasticity and tissue damage to the bronchial tubes. Although the causes of each ailment are distinctly different, they do have one common risk factor that you can control: smoking.

“About 85 percent of COPD cases are caused primarily by tobacco use,” says Dr. Lloyd Hayes, managing partner of Greenville Hospital’s Lung Center. “Smoking ­cessation is by far the single best thing a person can do to slow the progression of COPD and substantially decrease the loss of lung function.”

People suffering from respiratory diseases are also ­particularly susceptible to infection, so Hayes recommends they get annual flu shots and the pneumococcal vaccine to reduce their risk of further complications. “Since it is estimated that 50 percent of COPD sufferers go undiagnosed, anyone regularly experiencing shortness of breath, ­coughing and excessive mucus production should

GetMore Read the full America’s Health Rankings-2011 report on South Carolina at americashealthrankings.org/SiteFiles/Statesummary/SC.pdf

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SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

discuss these symptoms with their doctor and get annual flu vaccines.”

Diabetes

Diabetes occurs when the body doesn’t produce enough insulin, a condition known as Type I diabetes, or becomes insulin resistant and cannot metabolize glucose properly, a condition known as Type II diabetes. Glucose, the fuel our cells rely on, is formed from the sugars and starches we eat. It is the job of insulin to take the sugar from the blood into the cells. In people with diabetes, glucose builds up in the blood instead of going into cells, and can lead to eye and nerve damage, as well as kidney and heart disease. In South Carolina, diabetes is also one of the leading causes of amputation.

Healthy lifestyle choices are the best way to prevent and manage diabetes, says Dr. John Bruch, an endocrinologist and the medical director of Diabetes Services at Greenville Hospital. “It is very different from other types of disease,” he says. “You can’t just take a pill or undergo corrective surgery, it requires active lifestyle changes and self management.”

Fountain Inn resident, Clarise Spriggs, has a lot of experience living with diabetes; both her husband and her son have it. So when she learned of Greenville Hospital’s Power to Prevent Diabetes program, she finally committed to make some serious lifestyle changes to head off developing diabetes herself. Now, 40 pounds lighter, she is filled with energy and blogs about her experiences at ourhamandeggs.com. “Initially I had 1,001 reasons why I couldn’t do this,” she says, “but I finally realized you’re never too old to change.”

Spriggs sets an example more people should follow. The American Diabetes Association reports that nearly 24 million children and adults in the United States are living with diabetes. An additional 57 million Americans are at risk.

Surprisingly, many people are not even aware that they have diabetes. The Center for Disease Control and Prevention estimates 20 percent of affected people remain undiagnosed. “Many of the symptoms, like frequent ­urination, increased thirst and recurrent yeast infections go unnoticed,” Bruch says. “Anyone over age 35 who is overweight, or has high blood pressure, a family history of the disease, or has suffered from gestational diabetes is at increased risk.”

Fortunately for people diagnosed as “pre-diabetic” (blood glucose levels that are higher than normal but not yet high enough to be diagnosed as diabetes), acquiring a full-blown case is not inevitable. Studies show people with elevated glucose levels can prevent or delay the onset of diabetes through weight loss and exercise. “Intense exercise for 30 minutes a day, five days a week, and eating a low-fat, complex-carbohydrate diet can reduce the progression by up to 55 percent,” Bruch says.

SCStories

SC Life

Following the flood Many people remember the recordbreaking spring rains of 2009, but few

Milton Morris

experienced them as John Lane did, when a long-planned canoe trip from his Spartanburg home to the Atlantic Ocean just happened to coincide with near-peak flood levels throughout the state.

A dedicated outdoorsman who has paddled rivers all over the world, Lane says he “followed the flood” from Lawson’s Fork, which flows past his backyard, all the way down the Pacolet, Broad, Congaree and Santee rivers, covering 300 river miles before landing on Cedar Island near Georgetown 11 days later.

Along the way, Lane explored abandoned river towns, met some interesting characters and reveled in the abundance of wildlife found on the state’s waterways.

It was a journey the Wofford College professor had daydreamed about for a long time. “I thought, ‘How crazy is it to live on a creek in South Carolina and not paddle it to the ocean.’ ” But it was a brush with tragedy that prompted Lane to turn his plans into reality. On a rafting trip in Costa Rica in December of 2008, two fellow paddlers were killed in an accident, and Lane’s cross-state adventure was his first time back on the water—a way, he says, to settle his nerves and prove he could “get back into the wild.”

Lane details his journey in a new book, My Paddle to the Sea, and hopes his story will inspire others to explore South Carolina’s waterways.

“My major point in the book is get out, find the river closest to your house, get on it if you can and paddle as far as you can,” he says. “If you want to do these things, go and do them.”

John Lane AGE: 57 HOMETOWN: Spartanburg OCCUPATION: Writer, professor

of English and environmental studies at Wofford College.

PET PEEVE: People who will not recycle and compost at home LITTLE-KNOWN FACT: He is the subject of a new documentary, River Time, by Chris Cogan and Tom Byars. See the trailer at rivertimefilm.com.

—shandi stevenson

scliving.coop | February 2012 | SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING

21

SCScene

By Hastings Hensel | Illustrations by David Clark

One

gıant leap

A first-time trainer brought along a camera and a remarkable size of a man’s hand, and all afternoon we enters the fray sense of resilience—waited in line for a halfkept him in an inch of pond water at the hour in order to pay the $5 entry fee. The of Springfield’s bottom of a plastic, lidded, 2-pint barbecue sun was just beginning to burn off the early annual frog jump cloud cover, making the air heavy with late bucket with a dime-sized hole in the top for air. I spent half the day in paternal worry— April heat, and, as usual at any festival, the competition crowd was proving to be more intriguing than Was he cool enough? Was he hungry? Was the event. Everyone had frogs on their bodies (frog earhe thirsty? Was he angry? Was he pumped up? Was he rings, frog necklaces, frog T-shirts, hands waving frog flags still alive?—and so I would peek through the hole to see and frog banners) and frogs on their minds. One woman Milton squatting there, wide-eyed and patient and surely told me not to use salt when cooking frog legs because the ready to set the new state record at the 2011 Governor’s sodium will activate the muscles and the legs will jump Frog Jump Competition. right out of the frying pan.

We bought him for $10 from a clan of country boys Soon enough, after filling out the paperwork (which that advertised their business by draping—over the hood included questions like “Name of Trainer” and “Trainer’s of their truck—a cardboard sign with green-print lettering Hometown”), we registered Milton as the 121st bullfrog in that simply read, “Frogs For Sale.” I was in the high festival the competition, a Springfield tradition that has remarkably spirit, asking them where they’d caught the frogs, but all I persevered into its fourth decade. could get in response was a slow, reticent, frog-like belch: “Out … of … ponds.”

The prize was $750 and the right to represent South There is, I would learn later, an important and noticeable difference between a pond bullfrog and a North Edisto River Carolina in Calaveras County, Calif. For who can compete in frog-jumping without thinking of Mark Twain’s bullfrog, with the latter being leaner and darker. But they seminal 1865 short story “The Notorious Jumping Frog promised me I’d chosen well—the same size and sprightly of Calaveras County”—one of the first truly American legs that the oldest man usually “saved for his grand­ daughters.” I named him Milton, after the English poet. stories? It is because of this famous tale that the Calaveras So we—me, Milton, and my girlfriend Lee, who had County Fair and Jumping Frog Jubilee began in 1928. ll Milton was lean and long, roughly the

22

SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

scliving.coop | February 2012 | SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING

23

SCScene

Now the fair hosts 50,000 visitors each spring, a kind of national championship of frog-jumping. Springfield is the state championship of frog-jumping, and it is not hard to envision little regional, backyard contests all over the state.

A frog jump may not be exactly what you envision. Before I’d done any research, I’d pictured racing lanes, set off by cardboard, on a dirt floor in the kind of open-air structure that you would see at a county fair. But the goal of frogjumping is not crossing the finish line first. Frog-jumping is all about distance.

At the Springfield frog jump, when it is your turn, you step onto a grassy, fencedoff, rectangular yard that the town has obviously constructed for the contest. On three sides of the fence are wooden bleachers, where spectators sit casually cross-legged, gossiping, enjoying the deep-fried decadence, oohing and aahing, perhaps placing a few $5 side bets.

You set your bullfrog on a small, rubber lily pad. You cannot touch the frog or the pad. You will hear this repeated by the lanky emcee, who walks around and calls out on his cordless microphone, “Don’t touch the frog. Don’t touch the pad. Don’t touch the pad. Don’t touch the frog.”

You can, however, yell at the frog. You can throw grass on the frog. You can pour water on the frog. You can blow on the frog.

And, indeed, anyone you ask will offer some insider advice. The clerk at Kent’s Corner, where we bought three tall cans of Coors Light, told us that you have to keep the GetThere frogs in a dark closet for a month before you bring The Governor’s Frog Jump Contest takes them out. The point, she place every year on the Saturday before said, was that the light Easter in the town of Springfield. For more information call (803) 258-3152 or releases the endorphins, visit springfieldsc.us/governor.htm. which makes the frogs jump.

The woman who sold us a deep-fried Twinkie told us to put a little hot sauce on Milton’s butt. The man at the boiled peanut stand told us to feed Milton one of his Cajun peanuts. A man standing next to me said you had to hold the frog underwater until it starts kicking, and then you bring it out with its legs already pumping.

And while watching the 120 frogs that came before us (with names like Spongebob, Frogger and Hopper), we saw the whole gamut of strategy: wiping the frog off with a towel, pulling on the frog’s legs, kissing the frog, whispering into the frog’s ear, shaking the frog like a locked doorknob.

As soon as the frog is placed on the lily pad, it has 30 seconds to jump. The rules allow for the frog to jump three times, including what the emcee repeatedly calls “stutter steps,” before the Jump Master, trailing with a rollout tape measure, marks the spot of landing and records it on the registration papers.

Some frogs leap immediately. Some don’t budge.

Most, after an initial period of hesitation, take off for a modest 5 to 10 yards.

This is not to say, however, that the frog simply stops after three jumps. One of the sheer pleasures of the contest occurs when the frog eludes the young frog-catchers—a gang of athletic 12-yearolds—and wriggles through the fence and into the stands, where the crowd squeals and scatters as if from a fire.

When this happens, the emcee will try to calm everybody down and remind them that, “It is only a frog, and we don’t want anybody going to the hospital over a little old frog, now do we?” Nevertheless, it happens every fifth frog or so, and each time it produces the same squeals of delightful fear, the same scrambling of the boys under the bleachers.

One of the sheer pleasures of the contest occurs when the frog eludes the frog-catchers.

24

SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

Around 4:30 in the afternoon, after the emcee had already confessed his fatigue and thus been brought a plate of hot fries and a bottle of water, the registration reached triple digits. This meant that Lee, Milton and I were supposed to line up along the gate and wait for our number to be called.

There was no real fanfare for our entrance, and by that point we were exhausted. Still, we had high hopes

The drive back to the city was sleepy and beautiful, the flat farmlands stretching out before us. I kept scanning the roadside for ponds that we might release Milton into, and then we crossed the North Edisto River, and Lee told me to pull off on the shoulder. We walked back down the highway, to the bridge, where I opened up the barbecue bucket, expecting Milton to sit there with his usual complacence. But not now, not this frog.

He finally jumped three times: once out of the bucket and onto my shoulder, again from my shoulder onto the ledge of the bridge, and a third time into the river—a good 22 or 23 feet—surely the new, unofficial, never-to-be-­broken-again state record.

I stomped. I yelled. I threw grass. I spit. I prayed. I did all of those things twice. And still he didn’t budge. for Milton. Earlier he had startled me by jumping up and down in his bucket, as if he were ready to take us all the way to California, and I was sure that I had picked an excellent frog.

The emcee announced our names. I took Milton out of the bucket. It was the first time I had held him all day. I squeezed him as tightly as one might squeeze a tennis ball before a serve. I shook him a little bit. Lee patted down his legs with a leftover Subway napkin. I put him on the lily pad.

He didn’t budge.

I stomped. I yelled. I threw grass. I spit. I prayed. I did all of those things twice.

And still he didn’t budge, as if, reminiscent of Twain’s story, someone had sneaked a teaspoon of quail shot into his mouth while we were busy munching on a corndog.

Time was called, and it was a sad mixture of relief and shame. With the heat and the eyes of the crowd bearing down on me, I felt truly like an outsider. Why hadn’t I stretched his legs a little like I’d seen the young boy do on YouTube? Was Milton simply as tired as we were?

And so we put Milton back in the bucket and shuffled to the car, unsure about what we would do with this bullfrog that, although he had disappointed us, we loved like a child. Perhaps we could keep him in my mother’s koi pond in Columbia.

Even though there were 40 more frogs left to jump, I was pretty sure that Frogger had won at 16 feet, 11 inches.

His trainer was a previous winner and went about the whole thing with a seriousness that most competitors couldn’t match. We were, as I overheard someone else say, plumb wore out, and we decided to skip the street dance.

He finally jumped—surely the new, unofficial, never-to-be-broken-again state record. scliving.coop | February 2012 | SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING

25

SCGardener

BY S. CORY TANNER

Perfect three-cut pruning

Pruning for structure Make the first cut 8 to 12 inches out from the trunk, sawing up from the underside of the branch about halfway through the stem.

Step 1:

Move out 1 to 2 inches from the first cut and make a second cut down from the top. When you saw about three-quarters of the way through, the weighted branch will break out, back to the first cut.

Step 2:

Make the third cut at the branch collar. This will leave a nice, circular wound that should heal cleanly without the need for commercial wound-healing products.

Step 3:

26

Trees, much like people, must be developed while they are young. To borrow from Proverbs: Train up a tree in the way it should grow, and when it is old, it will not depart from it. In other words, a little pruning early in a tree’s life will lead to a strong, stable tree in maturity.

February is an excellent month for pruning trees, and by making smart choices now, you will prevent future headaches and help your trees grow strong and tall.

The most common structural defect in trees is the presence of co-dominant leaders, otherwise known as forks in the main stem or trunk. This problem generally arises early in a tree’s life, before one stem takes on the role of the dominant central leader. When two or more co-dominant stems arise, a weak attachment is formed in the branch fork. As the stems continue to grow larger and taller, the attachment becomes proportionally weaker, until one of the stems breaks out of the tree, usually during a storm. Some trees are more prone to developing forks than others. Maples in particular are troublesome, but oaks, elms, ash and some conifers may also have this problem.

A proactive gardener can prevent such defects by correcting them early. When looking at a young tree, evaluate the main stem that will form the trunk. We call this the central leader. It should be obviously dominant, with no other branches “racing” it to be the tallest.

If there are other branches growing at a strongly vertical angle—anything less than 45 degrees to the central leader—they should

SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

This tree with co-dominant leaders is a good example of a poorly pruned tree.

be removed. Similarly, stems that are equal to or greater in length than the central leader should be shortened.

Ideally you want to do this when the competing leaders are still very small —about the size of a pencil. At that size, removal is easy with a pair of hand pruners and the pruning wound will be minimal. As the leaders grow larger, correcting the problem becomes more difficult. Stems larger than threequarters of an inch in diameter will require a saw and special care to avoid creating a large wound.

Whether removing a co-dominant leader or pruning away low-hanging branches, there are a few simple principles to follow.

Remove gangly and strongly vertical branches, ideally when they are pencil-thin.

Before

After

STEEL MOBILE HOME ROOFING Insurance credit Don’t leave stubs. It is easy to cut a limb indiscriminately, but it should always be removed back to a bud, another branch or the main trunk.

Stubbed branches will tend to decay or produce undesirable regrowth.

Preserve the branch collar. Most branches have a swelling at their base called the collar. It is the transition area where two stems meet and contains tissues that grow new wood and bark over the wound, effectively sealing the cut. Remove the limb just outside the branch collar so the wound heals properly.

Use the right technique. On larger branches, use the three-cut pruning method (see facing page) to avoid splitting the branch and ripping the bark as the weighted branch falls. is an area horticulture agent for Clemson Extension based in Greenville County. Contact him at shannt@clemson.edu.

S. CORY TANNER

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27

SCTravels

BY JENNIFER BERRY HAWES

Total immersion The S.C. Aquarium explores the state’s rich biodiversity— above and below the water

GetThere The South Carolina Aquarium is located at 100 Aquarium Wharf, in downtown Charleston.

From March to August, the aquarium is open daily 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. From September to February, it’s open daily 9 a.m. to 4 p.m.

Hours:

$12.95 for children ages 2 to 11; $19.95 for adults; $18.95 for seniors. Tickets to the 4-D theater are an additional $5 per person.

Admission:

Details:

28

(843) 720-1990 or scaquarium.org

stories high

Photos © South Carolina Aquarium

The three-story tall Great Ocean Tank contains 385,000 gallons of saltwater and more than 50 species.

Standing three

and filled with 385,000 gallons of sparkling blue seawater, The Great Ocean Tank at the South Carolina Aquarium has a hypnotic beauty that often causes visitors to fall into a hushed silence.

Inside the floor-to-ceiling display swim more than 50 ocean species— ranging from colorful reef fish to sea turtles, stingrays and sharks—all seemingly oblivious to the mesmerized guests gathered on the other side of the thick glass. Complete with a craggy reef at its center, the exhibit offers a glimpse at the diversity of marine life inhabiting the Atlantic Ocean just offshore from the aquarium’s location on the edge of Charleston Harbor.

The Great Ocean Tank has been the signature exhibit of the aquarium since it opened in 2000, but it’s just one of five multi-sensory galleries that explore the watery connections between South Carolina’s major ecosystems and the variety of creatures that inhabit them.

“We try to mirror the ­topography,” says Public Relations Manager Kate Dittloff. “People are surprised that we have terrestrial creatures and not just aquatic ones, but we mirror the whole ecosystem.”

Like water flowing to the sea, a visit to the aquarium starts in The Mountain Forest. The gallery simulates a trek through the cool humidity of an Upcountry ravine lined with laurels and rhododendron. Brook trout swim beneath a small waterfall as a turkey peers down from a ledge, but the stars are the river otters, Stono and Ace, who delight children with their underwater acrobatics.

SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

Stono the river otter— or is it Ace?—entertains visitors in the aquarium’s Upcountry exhibit.

Next, enter The Piedmont. The air warms and two Eastern screech owls engage in a stare down over their mouse breakfast. One of the gallery’s signature exhibits tells the curious story of the Robust Redhorse, a freshwater fish species once thought extinct until biologists rediscovered them in South Carolina in the 1980s.

In The Coastal Plain, the Blackwater Swamp display features Alabaster, a rare albino alligator, one of only 50 in the world. Approaching the coast, an outdoor aviary in the The Saltmarsh gallery teems with brown pelicans and herons, while stingrays, diamondback terrapins and pufferfish inhabit the underwater exhibits.

The trail of galleries ends at the Great Ocean Tank, but there’s more to explore inside the 93,000 square-foot facility, including a touch tank, where kids of all ages can get hands-on with marine life, and the 4-D theater. At the end of the day, guests walk away with a better understanding of the beauty and complexity of the Palmetto State environment, says aquarium President Kevin Mills. “Most people are surprised to discover that while South Carolina is one of the smallest states in the union, we rank near the top in biodiversity.”

In addition to the permanent exhibits on the ecology and wildlife of South Carolina, the aquarium also features temporary displays with a global environmental focus. Coming this May is Madagascar Journey, a zoo of an exhibit complete with ringtail lemurs, geckoes, chameleons and, yes, hissing cockroaches.

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scliving.coop | February 2012 | SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING

29

SCRecipe

Edited by Carrie Hirsch

Valentine’s Day delights Valerie Strevell / istock

SUPER BLUE CHEESE DRESSING Yields 1 N cups

N pound blue cheese ½ cup buttermilk ½ cup sour cream

Marsha ivans, hilton head island

CROCK-POT BBQ CHICKEN SANDWICHES Serves 10

Elzbieta Sekowska / iStock

In a small bowl, mash up blue cheese with a fork, allowing some small chunks to remain. Whisk in the buttermilk and sour cream.

Cover and refrigerate for 2 hours.

Can be served as a salad dressing and as dipping sauce for hot wings or raw vegetables.

LOU LOU’S CHEESEBURGER MUFFINS

2 broiler or fryer chickens (3 to 3½ pounds each), cooked, boned and shredded 1 large onion, chopped 2 cups water 1 ¼ cups ketchup ¼ cup brown sugar ¼ cup Worcestershire sauce ¼ cup red wine vinegar

1 teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon chili powder ¼ teaspoon hot pepper sauce 10 hamburger buns

Combine all ingredients except hamburger buns into 3-quart slow cooker; cover and cook on low temperature setting for 6–8 hours.

Serve on buns.

Vickie roberts, rock hill

Yields 2 dozen

recipes for all seasons: appetizers, salads, main courses, side dishes, desserts and beverages. Selected original recipes win a $10 BI-LO gift card.

About submitting recipes

Entries must include your name, mailing address and phone number.

When writing recipes, please specify ingredient measurements. Instead of “one can” or “two packages,” specify “one 12-ounce can” or “two 8-ounce packages.” Note the number of servings or yield. Recipes are not tested.

Send recipes to South Carolina Living, 808 Knox Abbott Drive, Cayce, SC 29033, by email to recipe@scliving.coop or by fax to (803) 739‑3041.

30

In a skillet, cook beef and onion over medium heat until meat is no longer pink; drain. In a medium bowl, combine the flour, sugar, baking powder and salt. In another bowl, combine the ketchup, milk, butter, eggs and mustard; stir into the dry ingredients just until moistened. Fold in the beef mixture and cheese. Fill greased muffin tins three-quarters full. Bake in preheated oven at 425 degrees for 20–25 minutes. Cool for 5 minutes before removing from the pans to wire racks. Refrigerate leftovers.

Louise smith, rock hill

SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

Donna Moulton / istock

Francesca Rizzo / iStock

Send us recipes! We welcome

½ pound raw ground beef 1 small onion, finely chopped 2 ½ cups all-purpose flour 1 tablespoon granulated sugar 2 teaspoons baking powder 1 teaspoon salt ¾ cup ketchup ¾ cup milk ½ cup butter or margarine, melted 2 eggs 1 teaspoon prepared mustard 2 cups (8 ounces), shredded Cheddar cheese

GREAT GRANDMOTHER’S COOKIE CRUST CAKE serves 8–10

3 cups all-purpose flour 1 teaspoon baking powder 1 ½ cups Crisco 3 cups granulated sugar 8 eggs 2 teaspoons almond extract 2 teaspoons vanilla extract

Preheat oven to 300 degrees.

Generously grease and flour the pan. Sift flour and baking powder together. In a medium bowl, cream the Crisco and sugar with

mixer. Crack eggs into a bowl. Add one egg at a time, then add the flour mixture in half-cup increments until incorporated. Mix in both extracts. Pour the batter into an angel food pan, tapping the pan on the counter three times to remove air bubbles. Bake for 90 minutes. Allow the cake to cool for 10 minutes, then turn and flip it right side up immediately so the cookie crust is on top. Allow to cool completely.

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31

SCChef’sChoice

BY KILEY KELLERMEYER

Hot Diggity Doughnuts Ambergre Sloan serves up gourmet, almost guilt-free doughnuts from her bright turquoise truck on the streets of Charleston.

Brad Fergu son

KILEY KELLERMEYER

If you love eating doughnuts but can’t stand the nutritional guilt (or the extra pounds) that come with the traditional variety, Charleston’s Diggity Doughnuts has the answer.

This mobile bakery makes fresh doughnuts in a myriad of flavors— all with whole-grain unbleached flours, cane sugar and organic soymilk. No eggs or dairy are used, and if you need sugar-free or gluten-free, that’s no problem, either. These doughnuts are all natural, which means there are no preservatives, and nothing artificial, chemical or fake is added. But don’t think this means flavor is sacrificed in the name of nutrition.

“Doughnuts don’t need to have 45 ingredients to be good,” says owner Ambergre Sloan. “I wanted to make something that people like myself could feel a little better about eating, a doughnut that was made with ingredients you could actually pronounce.

A treat that was kind of ‘bad’ but secretly you know it’s not going to ruin your day with guilt.”

Though the Diggity Doughnuts truck may be small, the menu is

Diggity Doughnuts Diggity Doughnuts doesn’t have a fixed storefront, but the truck is usually parked at Coast Brewery (1250 North 2nd St., North Charleston) on Thursdays from 4 p.m. to 7 p.m., and in the Wagener Terrace neighborhood (2130 Mount Pleasant St., Charleston) on Sundays from noon to 5 p.m. For more information, visit diggitydoughnuts.com.

32

anything but. Sloan turns out new vegan recipes and changes her menu daily. Stop by the truck and you can find traditional flavors like chocolate sprinkled with coconut or mint, as well as Sloan’s more complex creations: mojito, pomegranate, lemon and dark chocolate, strawberry-jalapeno, cranberry, orange, sweet potato and oatmeal raisin cookie.

If you’re looking for a really sweet treat, the tamarind doughnut, which tastes like a sweet tart, may be up your alley. And, if you want something sweet and spicy, try the peanut butter and sriracha (a Vietnamese chili paste Sloan has turned into a glaze). People go crazy for the creamy sweetness melted with the spicy kick, and Sloan says the flavor was a runaway hit from day one.

Sloan draws her inspiration from flavors found worldwide. She’s used elements of Spanish, Moroccan,

SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

Danish and Japanese baking in her own recipes to create doughnuts that are not only better for you, but taste better, too.

“Doughnuts don’t have to be predictable,” Sloan says. “I make small-batch, craft doughnuts.

I want to keep it interesting and exciting.”

Classic flavors, like cinnamon and sugar, are $2 each, and specialty flavors, such as key lime pie, are $2.50. You can also pick up a hot or cold organic drink to sip alongside your doughnut. Iced Malaysian milk tea, mochaccinos and unsweetened pomegranate green tea are popular in summer, and organic dark roast coffees and flavored lattes are popular in winter.

The ability to deliver her doughnuts city-wide was what lured Sloan to a food truck. And while being a bakery on wheels may have its limitations, taking vegan doughnuts to the masses often offers sweet rewards.

“There are a lot of kids with milk allergies or egg allergies,” Sloan says.

“I’ve had many happy moms say, ‘My 5-year-old has never had a doughnut until now.’ ”

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69648 1 81 23672

RURAL ELECTRIC Here is one solution: Given C=2, the E’s can only equal 1.

So R=6, T=3, I=7, L=8, A=4, U=9, and Y=0.

S.C.Ramble! answer

Address ____________________________________________________________________________________________ City _______________________________________________________________________________________________ State/Zip ___________________________________________________________________________________________ Note: Co-op members should already receive this magazine as a membership benefit.

Please make check payable to South Carolina Living and mail to P.O. Box 100270, Columbia, SC 29202-3270.

(Please allow 4–8 weeks.) Call 1-803-926-3175 for more information. Sorry, credit card orders not accepted.

scliving.coop | February 2012 | SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING

35

Calendar of Events Please confirm information before attending events. For entry guidelines, access SCliving.coop.

UPSTATE

FEBRUARY

15–19 • “Marisol,” Johnson Theatre, Winthrop University, Rock Hill. (803) 323-4014.

18 • Cosmos for Critters, Upcountry History Museum, Greenville. (864) 275-5301.

18 • Bridesmaid’s Ball, Greenville Marriott, Greenville. (864) 770-0710.

13 • Moscow Festival Ballet: “Sleeping Beauty,” Lander University, Greenwood.

(864) 388-8326.

ONGOING

Daily • Art Gallery at the Fran Hanson Discovery Center, South Carolina Botanical Garden, Clemson. (864) 656-3405.

Daily • Trail Riding, Croft State Natural Area, Spartanburg. (864) 585-1283.

10–11 • The Skirmish at Gamble’s Hotel, The Columns, Florence. (803) 518-1931.

10–16 • Juilliard in Aiken Festival, various venues, Aiken. (803) 292-3124.

ONGOING

Daily • Trail Riding, Kings Mountain State Park, Blacksburg. (803) 222-3209.

Daily • Trail Riding, Lee State Park, Bishopville. (803) 428-5307.

Daily • Trail Riding, Poinsett State Park, Wedgefield. (803) 494-8177.

Daily • SOS Planet Showing, Riverbanks Zoo & Garden’s 3-D Adventure Theater, Columbia. (803) 779-8717.

Daily, except Sundays • Living History Days, Historic Brattonsville, McConnells.

(803) 684-2327.

Daily, except Mondays • Columbia Museum of Art, Columbia. (803) 799-2810.

Daily, except Mondays and major holidays • Historic Camden Revolutionary War Site, Camden. (803) 432-9841.

Sundays • Docent-led Gallery Four animal rescue groups jointly host the Cosmos for Critters masquerade fundraiser at the Upcountry Tour, Columbia Museum of Art, Columbia. (803) 779-4005.

History Museum in Greenville on February 18.

Mondays through May • Homeschool Mondays, 18–19 • 37th Annual Fireside Riverbanks Zoo & Garden, MIDLANDS Arts & Craft Show, Unicoi State FEBRUARY Columbia. (803) 779-8717.

Park, Helen, Ga. (800) 573-9659.

Second Tuesdays • 24–25 • Francis Marion 23–26 • Art & Antique Show, Family Night $1 Admission, Living History Encampment, The Chapman Cultural Center, Edventure Children’s Museum, Francis Marion Trail, Spartanburg. (864) 582-7616.

Columbia. (803) 779-3100.

Summerton. (803) 478-2645.

25 • Augsburger Fourth Thursdays • 24–26 • The Battle of Geigenbande, Twichell Tales for Tots, Edventure Aiken, Confederate Park, Auditorium, Converse College, Children’s Museum, Aiken. (706) 830-0930.

Spartanburg. (864) 948-9020.

Columbia. (803) 779-3100.

25 • Lexington’s Race Against 26 • Falconry Experience at Fridays • Main Street Hunger, downtown, Lexington.

Buck Shoals, Buck Shoals State Marketplace, Columbia Museum (803) 359-7770, Ext. 20.

Park, Helen, Ga. (706) 878-3087. of Art, Columbia. (803) 779-4005.

MARCH

2-3 • Reedy River Run, Main Street, Greenville.

(864) 303-0744.

3 • Upstate Walk to Defeat ALS, Furman University, Greenville. (866) 492-4821.

3 • Mind Over Mountain 15K: The Search for the Carolina Mountain Goat, Jones Gap State Park, Marietta. (864) 907-1742.

36

MARCH

2–4 • 29th Annual Craftsmen’s Spring Classic Art & Craft Festival, SC State Fairgrounds, Columbia. (336) 282-5550.

3 • Pine Needle Basket Workshop, Lee State Park, Bishopville. (803) 428-5307.

3 • Prep Fest, Aiken Prep School, Aiken. (803) 648-3223.

3–4 • Battle For Broxton Bridge Reenactment, Broxton Bridge Plantation, Ehrhardt. (800) 437-4868.

National Shag Dance Championships take place in Myrtle Beach at the 2001 Nightclub, March 8–10.

Saturdays • Behind-theScenes Adventure Tours, Riverbanks Zoo & Garden, Columbia. (803) 978-1113.

Saturdays and Sundays • Gallery Tour, Columbia Museum of Art, Columbia. (803) 799-2810.

Daily, by appointment • Overnights and Night Howls, Riverbanks Zoo & Garden, Columbia. (803) 779-8717, Ext. 1113.

LOWCOUNTRY FEBRUARY

7–26 • “Lend Me a Tenor,” Arts Center of Coastal Carolina, Hilton Head Island. (843) 842-2787.

10–21 • Lowcountry Blues Bash, various venues, Charleston. (843) 762-9125.

15–19 • Beaufort International Film Festival, multiple locations, Beaufort. (843) 522-3196.

16–18 • Myrtle Beach Marathon, various venues, Myrtle Beach. (843) 293-7223.

Piano Duo performed at 2011’s Juilliard in Aiken.

SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

17–19 • Southeastern Wildlife Exposition, various venues, Charleston. (843) 723-1748.

23–24 • African-American Heritage Days, Wannamaker County Park, North Charleston. (843) 762-8089.

24–25 • 18th Annual Quilt Gala, Ocean Lakes Family Campground, Myrtle Beach. (843) 238-5636.

25 • LifePoint Gift of Life 5K/2K Run/Walk, James Island County Park, Charleston. (800) 462-0755.

26 • Chef’s Feast, Embassy Suites Charleston Area Convention Center, North Charleston. (843) 747-8146, Ext. 105.

MARCH

1–4 • Charleston Food & Wine Festival, various venues, Charleston. (843) 727-9998.

1–12 • Charleston Film Festival, The Terrace Theater, Charleston. (843) 762-4247.

2 • Shakespeare’s “Comedy of Errors,” Arts Center of Coastal Carolina, Hilton Head Island. (843) 842-2787.

2–4 • Winyah Bay Heritage Festival, East Bay Park, Georgetown. (843) 833-9919.

3–4 • All Breed Dog Show, Honey Horn Plantation, Hilton Head Island. (843) 726-3237.

5–10 • Hilton Head Island Wine & Food Festival, various venues, Hilton Head Island. (843) 686-4944.

8–10 • National Shag Dance Championships, 2001 Nightclub, Myrtle Beach. (843) 222-6706.

10 • ArtFest, Mount Pleasant Town Centre, Mount Pleasant. (843) 884-8517.

10 • Upper Dorchester Historical Society Bluegrass Concert, Lourie Theater, St. George. (843) 873-7801.

10–18 • Canadian-American Days Festival, multiple venues, Myrtle Beach. (843) 626-7444.

ONGOING

Daily • Trail Riding, Cheraw State Park, Cheraw. (843) 537-9656.

Daily, except Christmas • Brookgreen Gardens, Murrells Inlet. (843) 235-6000.

Daily, except major holidays • Parris Island Museum, Beaufort.

(843) 228-2166.

Daily, except Mondays • Feeding Frenzy, Huntington Beach State Park, Murrells Inlet. (843) 237-4440.

Daily • Nature Center, Hunting Island State Park, Hunting Island. (843) 838-7437.

Saturdays–Tuesdays • Mansion Tours, Hampton Plantation State Historic Site, McClellanville. (843) 546-9361.

Second Saturdays • Local League of Artisans Arts & Crafts Bazaar, Yesterday’s, Hartsville. (843) 498-6576.

SCHumorMe

By Jan A. Igoe

’Tis the season of the crud Like everyone who smooched one too many typhoidal third cousins over the holidays, I’ve got the crud. My lungs and sinuses are now weapons of mass mucous production, working to guarantee legions of doctors, respiratory therapists and pharmacists full employment through April, at least.

I’m not complaining about the post-nasal sludge, nonstop hacking or noon-whistle wheezing. Everyone you meet sounds like a pneumatic riveter this time of year.

And fashion-wise, the ski mask Honey gave me to prevent spreading my personal plague doesn’t look half bad with

the right accessories. (My kids actually like it better than my favorite knit hat, which they hid so I won’t get mistaken for the homeless, senile bird feeder in Home Alone 2.

They’re always thinking of me.)

Back at the doc’s for the third time, I emerged with more prescriptions and a handful of samples (which I shamelessly begged for) in a paper bag. The doc assured me I’m not really contagious, only disgusting. So on my way back to the pharmacy, I returned one last Christmas 38

SOUTH CAROLINA LIVING | February 2012 | scliving.coop

present at the mall. There’s a good chance I’d need that money and a second mortgage to pay for all these meds.

The pharmacy tech watched wearily as I emptied all 67 compartments of my purse on her counter. There were dog leashes, tennis socks, foreign coins, Crock-Pot recipes and bungee cords, but amazingly, no prescriptions. My oxygenstarved brain and I sorted through the rubble again, trying to discern their disappearance. Then it hit us.

I collected all my green-slimed tissues in a coffee cup.

The cup went into a paper bag. I vaguely remember depositing a bag in a trash can outside the mall. And my prescriptions just might have been in that bag.

The doc’s office had already closed, so I drove back to the mall, waited until the trash can was alone and dove in headfirst, trying to be discreet. About 15 minutes later, I headed back to my car with slimy prescriptions in hand. Victory was mine until the car refused to start. Its battery was deader than my brain, which neglected to turn the headlights off.

This shouldn’t have been a problem because we own several sets of jumper cables. But for reasons even mucous-free females with clear heads can’t grasp, all of them live at home in the garage, although I’m not blaming any particular husband.

No need to panic. I’d simply scope out the parking lot to find some Good Samaritan with his own set of jumper cables who’d be eager to help a wheezing, sneezing, hacking damsel in distress.

Suddenly, I spied a large white Dodge Ram, cut off from the herd. Cautiously approaching the driver’s side window, I didn’t want to spook him. But before I could throw myself on his mercy, the large, frightened driver started punching numbers in his phone and yelling, “Get back! The cops are on their way!”

Apparently, some crazy person in a ski mask was stalking motorists in the parking lot. So I took refuge behind my favorite trash can and waited for the police. Maybe they’d give me a jumpstart. Or better yet, arrest me and take me to a nice, warm jail with free drugs.

JAN A. IGOE ,

our writer and illustrator from Horry County, is ever so ready for warm, slime-free weather and perhaps a new hat. Reach her at HumorMe@SCLiving.coop.

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