Index

A

Absolute Truth, 121, 130 Academy for the Love of Learning, 149 acceptance, 12 acupressure, 76–77 a ection, 20 A ictive Emotions, 79 Alcoholics Anonymous, 12, 39, 54 American-centric news, 17 anger, 36, 98 anterior cingulate cortex, 136–37 Applied Buddhism, 78–80 archetypes, 49, 83, 85–87 Asanga, story of, 56–59 Atisha, 144 atoms, 118 Attachment, 73 attraction, 67 aversion, 67–68 awakening, 143 awareness, 4–5, 129, 131

B

Baba, Neem Karoli, 28, 33, 63 Bardo, 59 Beck, Martha, 85 behaving well, 32–33 blind faith, 105 Bodhicitta: Buddha qualities cultivated by, 5; cultivating of, 6; definition of, 3; motivation, 8, 21, 142; training in, 59 Bodhisattva Matraiya, 57 Bohm, David, 10–12, 15, 47, 118, 151 Bokar Rinpoche, 44, 131 Borg, Björn, 8 Boundless Compassion, 5–7, 53–60, 69 Boundless Equanimity, 15–21; definition of, 8, 16; description of, 6–7; practice of, 19–20; reincarnation, 16–17 Boundless Loving Kindness, 23–29; of

Dalai Lama XIV, 13; description of, 6–7; practice of, 24–29 Boundless Sympathetic Joy, 6–7, 61–63 brain: anterior cingulate cortex of, 136–37; functions of, 44, 136; hippocampus of, 136; mindfulness e ects on, 136–37; studies of, 132–34 “Break in the Cup,” 4 Buddha: definition of, 47, 79, 86;

Devadatta and, 17; hate and, 28; Heart

Sutra, 131; planes of existence, 27;

Sanskrit definition of, xxi, 3; teachings of, 55 Buddha Maitreya, 56, 58–59 Buddha Nature, 5–6, 25, 59, 66, 154–55 Buddhism: e ciency of, 83; pairs in, 5–6;

Tibetan, xxii, xxv, 83; Tonglen in, xxv;

Vajrayana, 59, 154–55; Yanas of, 152

C

caring, 6, 20 Chagdud Tulku, 100 Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche, 105 Christakis, Nicholas, 150 chronic anger, 36 clearing away flaws, xxii clearing away obscurations, 5–6, 59 Clearing the Stale Energies, xvi-xvii clinginess, 73, 156 cognizant abiding, 134 “coherent light,” 160 Compassion, xxiii, xxv; Boundless, 5–7, 53–63, 69; definition of, 69; empathy versus, 69–70; Equanimity and, 69;

Far Enemy of, 74–75; Near Enemy of, 74–75; practice with, 21; warmth of, 4 Concentration, Transcendent, 104 Conditional Love, 73 Congleton, Christina, 136–37 Connected: The Surprising Power of Our Social

Networks and How They Shape Our Lives—

How Your Friends’ Friends’ Friends A ect

Everything You Feel, Think, and Do, 150 connection, 6, 19–20, 78 consciousness, 121 constructive feedback, 49 contemplative science, 137 cortisol, 37 cravings, habit-motivated, xxii Cruelty, 74 crying, 54 curiosity, 4

D

dak-nang, 86 Dalai Lama, XIV, His Holiness: Boundless

Loving Kindness of, 13; foreword by, xi; photograph of, x; self-love by

Westerners, 23–24

Davidson, Richard, 132 death, 126, 129 default-mode network, 132 defensiveness, 50 depression, 136 desire, 73, 156 Devadatta, 17 Dharma, 24, 54, 59, 79, 96, 100–01 Discipline, Transcendent, 96–97 distracted wandering, 132 distraction, 66, 104, 119 distraction awareness, 133 divorce, 4 DNA, 118 dorsolateral prefrontal cortex, 133 dreaming consciousness, 121 dreams, xxi, 121, 123 drupchöds, 160 Duhigg, Charles, 149 dumping of garbage, 50–51 Dzigar Kongtrul Rinpoche, xxii

E

Earth centric, 27 Eckhart, Meister, xxii ego, 8, 19, 118, 130, 154 ego fixation, 65 ego identification, 6–7 electrons, 118 “emotional allergies,” 148 empathy, 36, 69–70 emptiness, 98, 131 empty essence of things, 4 endorphins, 73 enemies: behaving well by, 32–33; Far. See

Far Enemy; love for, 31; Near. See Near

Enemy; transforming of, into friend, 28 enlightenment, xxv, 15, 47, 59, 143 Equanimity: Boundless. See Boundless

Equanimity; Compassion and, 69; description of, xxv; Far Enemy of, 67–70; Indi erence versus, 68–69; narcissism and, 25; Near Enemy of, 67–70; practice with, 19–21, 90; training in, 19 Ethical Discipline, 96 Ethics, 96 executive functions, 44 expectations, 9, 12, 51 “exploding doormat,” 85 F

Far Enemy: of Compassion, 74–75; Cruelty as, 74; definition of, 65; of Equanimity, 67–70; identifying of, 66; Jealousy as, 75–76; of Loving Kindness, 71–74; Near

Enemy versus, 66–67; of Sympathetic

Joy, 75–78 fearless forbearance, 98 fears, 12; protection from, 96 feedback, 49 feeling(s): description of, 3, 5, 19, 24, 66, 134; sentimentality versus, 71–72 fierceness, 47–48 fight-or-flight mode, 36–37 flaws: clearing away, xxii; in ego, 154; innate, xxv floater, 119 focused attention, 132 Forbearance, Transcendent, 98–101 Forbearing Facing Into Reality, 100–01 Forgive for Good, 42 Forgive for Love, 43, 45–46 forgiveness: benefits of, 46–47; description of, 28, 32, 34; of grudges, 42, 46; health and, 36–37; Jung and, 46–47; need for, 46; in relationships, 46; of self, 46 “Forgiveness: Your Health Depends on

It,” 36 form, 131 Four Abodes of Brahma, xxv Four Boundless Qualities: Compassion.

See Compassion; connection and, 78; description of, xxv, 5–6; Equanimity.

See Equanimity; Loving Kindness. See

Loving Kindness; practicing of, 37;

Round Robin practice with, 21, 88, 140, 142; Shamata and, 44–45; Sympathetic

Joy. See Sympathetic Joy; training in, 6 Four Bramaviharas, xxv Four Noble Truths, xxii Four Sublime Attitudes, xxv Fowler, James, 150 Fox, Matthew, xxii freedom, Americans’ view of, xxi-xxiii friend, enemy transformed into, 28

G

Gandhi, Mahatma, 32 garbage, dumping of, 50–51 Garbage Truck skills, 50–51 Gates to Buddhist Practice, 100 Generosity, Transcendent, 96 Geshe Chekawa Yeshe Dorje, 144 Geshe Tönpa, 54 Gestalt, 82

Goenka Group, 110 gratitude, 42, 98 Gratitude Attitude journal, 42 Great Mother archetype, 83–84 Green Tara, 83–86 Greenburg, Dan, 76 grief, 53 Group Accomplishment, 160 group meditation, 150–52 grudges, 33–34, 37–38, 46 Guide to the Bodhisattva Way of Life, A, 100 Guru Rinpoche, 48 Gyatrul Rinpoche, 10

H

habits: cravings motivated by, xxii; egoclinging, 9; of mind, xxi; resentment as, 39–41 happiness, 8–9, 12, 70 Harris, Dan, 132, 137, 140 Harvard Business Review, 136 Hasenkamp, Wendy, 132 hate, 28, 66–67; love and, 68 Hatred, 71 Hayagriva, 85–87 Heart Sutra, 131 hidden lamas, 99 hippocampus, 136 Hitler, Adolf, 32, 74 Holo-movement, 10 hologram, universe as, 10–12, 47 Hölzel, Britta K., 136–37 How to Make Yourself Miserable, 76 human nature, fatal flaw view of, xxiii hurt: constructive feedback on, 49; resolving of, 42–43; Sympathetic Joy and, 63 Hypocrisy, 76

I

“I,” 19, 126, 128–29. See also ego idiot compassion, 105 “if-onlys,” 10 “I’m Sorry” Practice, 50 Impartiality, 8 Impermanence, 127, 130 impoverishments, 4–5 Indi erence, 68–69, 74 individuation, 47 indulgence, righteous wrath as, 39 inner work, 55, 97 insight, 109–15 Insight Meditation, 66 Insight Meditation Society, 110 inward analysis, 126 J

Jamgön Kongtrül the Great, 145 Jealousy, 75–76 Jigmey Lingpa, 101 Joyful E ort, Transcendent, 101 Judaism, xxii, 91 Jung, Carl, 46, 49, 80, 82–83

K

karma: cleaning of windshield, 97–98; description of, xxi; loss of, 98; negative, 98; positive, 20, 55 Khampa Lungpa, 54 Khenpo Donyo, 131 King, Martin Luther Jr., 31, 33–34, 38, 127, 148 Kukkutapada Mountain, 56

L

lama: Dalai. See Dalai Lama; hidden, 99;

Root, 154–55 Lama Tsomo, x, 151, 153, 175–78 lateral inferior parietal lobe, 133 Law of the Garbage Truck, The, 50 Lazar, Sara W., 136–37 Learning Circles, 147, 149 Levine, Peter, 37 life experience, 135 Lojong, 143–44, 148 loneliness, 4, 6 “looking at the thinker” practice, 128–29 love, xxiii, 7; Attachment versus, 73;

Conditional Love, 73; desire/clinging versus, 73; feelings of, 24; hate and, 68; romantic, 73; for self, 23–24, 26; worthy of, 25 “love thy neighbor as thyself,” 25, 74 Loving Kindness: a ectionate, 24;

Boundless, 23–29; definition of, 7; description of, xxv, 6; Far Enemy of, 71–74; Hatred versus, 71; Near Enemy of, 71–74; practice of, 21, 78; for self, 26, 74; to sentient beings, 25, 27; training on, 23–29 Luskin, Fred, 39, 42–43, 45–46 Lutz, Antoine, 132

M

Macy, Joanna, 53, 55 Mahayana, 59 marriage, 4 material giving, 96 McLeod, Ken, 145

meditation, 29, 55, 115; distraction in, 66; group, 150–52; Insight Meditation, 66;

Post-Meditation, 143 Meditation Buddy, 147, 149 meditation cycle, 132–33 mental flexibility, 136 meta-awareness, 44 Metta, 26 Middle Way, 131 Milarepa, 100 mind: habits of, xxi; resting of, 112 Mind and Life, 114 “Mind Training,” 144 mind wandering, 132 mindfulness, 136–37 “Mindfulness Can Literally Change Your

Brain,” 136 Mingyur Rinpoche, 24 misery, 70, 136 mistakes, 46, 50; responsibility for, 51

N

Namchak Khen Rinpoche, 119, 141, 155 Namchak Khen Rinpoche Ngawang Gelek, 110 narcissism, 25 Nastase, Ilie, 8 Near Enemy: of Compassion, 74–75;

Conditional Love as, 73; definition of, 65; of Equanimity, 67–70; Far Enemy versus, 66–67; Hypocrisy versus, 76; identifying of, 66–67; Indi erence as, 68–69, 74; of Loving Kindness, 71–74;

Pity as, 74; self-centeredness as, 74;

Sentimentality as, 71; of Sympathetic

Joy, 75–78 negative character scenario, 85 negative emotions, 44 negative karma, 98 negative message, 24 negative observations, 50 Neimark, Jill, 78 neuroses, xxv Ngöndro, 152, 156 Nonviolent Communication, 49–50, 148 nyam-len, 105, 126

O

obscurations, clearing away, 5–6, 59 Oliver, Mary, 88–89 One Hundred Peaceful and Wrathful

Deities, 83 Original Blessing, xxii original neuroses, xxv Original Purity, xxii Original Sin, xxii, xxv Our Town, 129 outer analysis, 120–23 outer work, 55

P

pain, 4 Paramitas: definition of, 95; Transcendent

Concentration, 104; Transcendent

Discipline, 96–97; Transcendent

Forbearance, 98–101; Transcendent

Generosity, 96; Transcendent Joyful

E ort, 101; Transcendent Wisdom, 104–05 parasympathetic nervous system, 45 parietal lobe, 133 Partnering Exercise, 149 patience, 98 Pema Chödrön, xvi, 145 Pema Traktung, 48–49 Perls, Fritz, 82 Pity, 74 Pollay, David J., 50 positive emotions, 44, 66 positive feelings, 24 positive karma, 20, 55 Post, Stephen, 78 Post-Meditation, 143 post-traumatic stress disorder, 136 poverty of heart, 4, 19 Power of Habit, The, 149 practice: of Compassion, 21; of

Equanimity, 19–21, 90; gaining experience through, 105; “looking at the thinker,” 128–29; loving connection through, 78; of Loving Kindness, 24–29, 78; “remembering” a ected by, 137; of Sympathetic Joy, 21, 88, 90; Tibetan word for, 126; “what’s left” exercise, 126–27 preference, 67 prefrontal cortex/lobe, 44, 66 Preliminaries, 156 Profound Wisdom of the Heart Sutra and Other

Teachings, 131 projection, 80–88 protection from fears, 96 protons, 118 psychotherapy, xxiii-xxiv, 41, 70 pure vision, 86 purity, xxii

R

Ram Dass, 131 Rand, Frank, 90 reality, 135–37 reciprocal anger, 98 reincarnation, 16–17 relationships: forgiveness in, 46; grudgeholding in, 46 Relative Truth, 120–21, 131 resentment, 33, 36, 39–41 resilience, 136 responsibility for mistakes, 51 rest in Shamata, 118, 134–35, 140 resting of mind, 112 Ricard, Matthieu, 132 Righteous Wrath, 38–39, 41 righteousness, 63 Rimey, 145 Rinpoche. See Tulku Sangak Rinpoche romantic love, 73 Rome, Harold, 114 Root Lama, 154–55 Rosenberg, Marshall, 49 Round Robin practice: for Four Boundless

Qualities, 21, 88, 140, 142; for

Vipassana, 142

S

Saddleback Church, 151 Samsara, 77, 104, 113; dream of, xxi, 121; expectations of, 12; first step out of, 13; flaws in, 12; happiness in, 12; liberation from, xxv; root of, xxv Sang-ngag Tenzin, xiii Sangha, 78–80, 147–50 Sangha strand, 80 Sanskrit, xxi seeing, 3, 5, 66 self: awareness of, 41, 45–46; compassion for, xxiii, xxv; fierce parts of, 47; forgiveness for, 46; inner work for, 55; love for, xxiii, xxv, 23–24, 26; Loving

Kindness for, 26, 74 self-centeredness, 74 self-regulation, 136 self-righteousness, 63 sentient beings, 25, 27, 77 Sentimentality, 71–72 Serlingpa, 144 Seven Point Mind Training, 143–45 Shamata, 42–43, 114; clearing away obscurations in, 6; description of, xv-xvi, xxiii; empty essence of things realized through, 4; executive functions and, 44;

Four Boundless Qualities and, 44–45; gratitude, 42; image support for, 110; practice with, 21, 114, 139; rest in, 118, 134–35, 140; self-awareness through, 45–46; thoughts during, xxiii; Tonglen and, 111 Shamatha Project, 137 Shantideva, 29, 100 Sheldrake, Rupert, 47 Siegel, Daniel, 114, 140 Smith, Bob, 54 sound, emptiness and, 131 specificity, 61–62 Spirit Rock, 110 spiritual mentorship, 154 spiritual poverty, 4 Start Where You Are, 145 Stern, Aaron, 149 stress, 136 Sublime Insight, 109–15, 118–19, 129 sublime seeing, xxv su ering, xxii, 7, 12, 25, 127 Sutra of Definitive Commentary on the

Enlightened Intent, The, 111 Swartz, Karen, 36 Sympathetic Joy: Boundless, 6, 61–63; definition of, 8; description of, xxv; Far

Enemy of, 75–78; Hypocrisy versus, 76;

Jealousy versus, 75–76; Near Enemy of, 75–78; practice with, 21, 88, 90 sympathetic nervous system, 45

T

10% Happier, 132, 140 Teresa, Mother, 4 Tergar, 110 Tergar Sangha, 21, 142 Theravadins, 26 Thich Nhat Hanh, 47 “thinker,” 115, 125–37 thought-other-outer, 117 thoughts, 134 Three Jewels, 79, 120–21, 148 Three Poisons, 79, 112 Tibetan Buddhism, xxii, xxv, 83

Tonglen: bodhicitta cultivation through, 6; Boundless Compassion through, 7; compassion in, xxiii, xxv; definition of, xxv; description of, xvi, 26; empathy, 70;

Equanimity, 68; love in, xxiii; practice with, 21, 88, 90; Shamata and, 111; widening our view, 4 Tonglen: The Path of Transformation, xvi Toolkit, 147, 152 Transcendent Concentration, 104 Transcendent Discipline, 96–97 Transcendent Forbearance, 98–101 Transcendent Generosity, 96 Transcendent Joyful E ort, 101 Transcendent Wisdom, 104–05 troublemakers, 28, 31 Truth: Absolute, 121, 130; Relative, 120–21, 131 Tulku Orgyen Chemchok, 99 Tulku Sangak Rinpoche, x, 24, 33, 55, 69, 88, 99, 110, 112, 119–20, 125, 131, 155 Two Truths, 131 typecast, 80

U

unconscious competence, 137 unfulfilled expectations, 51 universe: Bohm’s structure of, 11; as hologram, 10–12, 47

V

Vajrayana Buddhism, 59, 154–55 vengeful thoughts, 40 Vietnam War, 47, 55 Vipassana, xxv, 105, 109–11, 113–15, 125–26, 130, 134, 139, 141 virtuous acts, 96

W

waking consciousness, 121 Waking the Tiger, 37 Waking Up in Community, 79 wandering, 132 warmth, 20 Warren, Rick, 151 waterfall, 4–5 wave-particle, 118 Way of the Bodhisattva, The, 29, 98 Weber, Renée, 11–12, 151 Weekly Progression Guideline, 91–93 Western psychology, xxiv Westerners: American-centric news, 17; expectations of, 9; flaws and, xxii; poverty of heart in, 4; self-love by, 23–24 “what’s left” exercise, 126–27 Why Good Things Happen to Good People, 78 Wilcox, David, 4–5 Wilson, Bill, 54 wisdom: description of, 4–5; Transcendent, 104–05 Woollcott, Alexander, 90 worthy of love, 25

Y

Yanas, 152

Z

Zen, 15