The Ignored One (2021) poem by N.A.A.M. Sheikh Nur, Deutschland

The Ignored One Everytime, a goodbye There where I for once welcome a beautiful soul I seem to already have to say goodbye With that gaze of mine

Why? I want Love Can I Love?

No more a goodbye after a deserved hi!

Even with a gaze But a, I hope to see you soon!

With a gaze?

Have a good day and Having plans for the weekend?

May I? Say hi?

One gaze?

Can I really amaze Men? Without only stealing pleasure as plan?

Or should I be quiet and forever alone Being the silent?

Loud but silent?

With my gaze?

Kept frozen in a photograph they seem to marry While the World its suffer I carry Somehow I wonder, who wants me right now?

I have nothing

Nature I ask: Can someone look me in my eyes?

I want to share a moment Dont be shy Men seem to start confident but end up Shy Did they told you to say Goodbye?

Heroes only seem to be left to my imagination and hope While others hurt me to hurt them and hurt The Earth until its left to the dirt As I had to say goodbye Before I met time With you That you stopped right there In my bedroom, but also In France Time That left me Why? When I saw you To be real I feel left alone to a crime to never shine You showed your face and there was I You left a moment in my past Can I make it go further on?

Who are you that I want to Share more of these moments with Moments I can lay down with On a bed I these days dont have As I left a hateful, destroyful past Could it be my future feelings we fly on As we daydream maybe together Who knows?

Your thoughts I keep pulling from that questioning gaze in the clouds I was staring at Were you amazed? Lll On what line were you on?

Right or left?

Stuck in crimescenes and theft?

Could this be somehow a test?

I am more worth than just a start Or some words or clicks about that girl Endless counts endless thrills Untill I die left alone on crimescenes to appear on Sick minds and his fantasies?

I think he is different I look like a whore but true men seem to adore Me I distract and forget ones sick past To climb further on future time I wish I could make you feel as much Love, attraction and care A possible future I could share But I always seem to be left alone somewhere As no one seems to dare To say hi Were you scared?

I still care It makes me scared Only a single gaze we shared Thoughts saved on a single gaze?

I imagine too much Care too much Hide it too much As I died because of it too much In the mind Because I feel People seem to hate me Only because I feel I still, feel I cry so I still Feel

A face shown, there where I was blown away by: Why you?!

It left a mark in my shy being saying why that French guy?

I always end up saying goodbye With the gaze of mine

As I never have to talk They just walk, further on Ignoring me Could i be boring?

Do i look stupid?

Or ugly?

Could I be maybe just too free?

On hate, forever I wait, To erase hateful gazes from my lovable memories How to fill in darkness, a lonely search for some love and awareness To love more and hate less As I barely hate I must confess I confess that I was lost I still am lost In Paris Gare du Nor Lost Looking for a small room to be alone with things hanging on my line in my cloud I was still alive and so proud Daydreams somewhere to be found on terabyte and gigabyte Did you went on mine?

Got something to hide?

Like to intertwine as you have stopped my time?

Why not just say hi? In real daily life?

These things I question myself and feel as stupid as I am these days Le stupide Communism kept me stuck in my hopeless dreams trying to copy and steal what should be only meant for the real To for once mean something to the world To make and share true love Art and love I feel no love as I feel unsafe How to make, create, while feeling lost these days?

I only imagine of how it could feel The silent should win from the loud

In my current daydream i came, silent but loud With someone i wish to talk to on my count Time You kept it right there Dimensions I daydream about With you Did you come as loud?

But only for me to hear?

What if you would come near?

Would it let insanity disappear?

It kept me stuck on our time

But they keep walking further on Men who just seem to pretend in the end And say goodbye With empty gazes Money that amazes Those lost gazes Or gazes filled with others pain and shame turned into empty faces Too late to just stay and say hey Brainwashed to be passed By my time I even say goodbye With the gaze of mine To those who only seem to steal away treasures of my time The silent talks for me The future decides for me The patient one cares for me The lovable one stays with me And will wait Can we erase together a past it's hateful gaze?

And make love?

Share love?

Become love?,

Who is he And who am I to him?

I keep questioning The Ignored One Stuck here in Düsseldorf HBF With 2 procent phonebattery left

Nadiya Amina Awei(y)s Mohamed Mohado Sheikh Nur 30-11-1995 03-09-2021 10:33PM

No phonenetwork.

I feel embarrased and alone.

I wish i could have friends. At least.

A job or getting shelter seems impossible.

I asked strangers for a place to stay in the beginning.

I slept on benches but felt strong.

Shelters and hotels.

I miss a cosy warm place for my own or ..?

I feel weak.

Used and weak.

I miss my parents and family.

But they are stuck with insanity and want me to be free Every hope is leaning on me Why? Its heavy. I barely know.

I just go And follow Love?

....

Love to be there for once for my own I dont want to share Someone who cares Do you dare?

I always wait For someone who Dares to Wants to Be with me to Love What takes it to love?

No illusion No confusion Only love

.

Went on writing in the train. Help. People treat me not so good. Inhuman way. I have never felt so left alone by my parents and family. Friends and countries. By law and more. No human rights. I do nothing wrong, close to nothing. People even steal from me. Wish me to become angry and cry as i now do. Can i be human and so cry? Love? And feel? In NL i had no medical help. Nothing. I wrote a poem. I felt extremely in love, or about to fall in love. I have seen him in Paris. Cant get him out of my mind. I admit. I dont want to go there either. I want to go to the UK or here even, as long as its safe. I dont know how life is in Paris. Could be beautiful. I have only seen harshness. I was amazed by Eiffels tower. And in this country by nature. I dont want to go to NL. I felt dead there in the mind for my whole life. I see in color i would say in april. France was magical somewhere. How is he doing? I care ever since after one gaze thinking like, ehmm?... I miss myfam.