Living dfree®: Vol 6 April 2019

Page 1

TAKE THE CHALLENGE.

PUSH THE CULTURE. JOIN BILLION DOLLAR CHALLENGE. VOL. 6 E-MAGAZINE, 2nd Quarter Edition

FEATURE

I AM OUR INFLUENCERS IN ACTION

CARMEN MCCLENDON NATIONAL ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT SUBCOMMITTEE

DELVIN JOYCE

DENISE PYFROM

FINANCIAL PLANNER, PRUDENTIAL ADVISORS

ASSOCIATE MANAGER, GLOBAL PARTNERSHIPS NBA

THE MONEY COACH®

LYNNETTE KHALFANI-COX 1

POWERED BY | LIVING

SHARES THE IMPORTANCE OF A GAME PLAN


2 | LIVING


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CONTENTS

25

FEATURES

6. Tamika Stembridge: Why Me?

9. I Am dfree® Our advocates Carmen McClendon, Delvin Joyce and Denise Pyfrom 17. Lynnette Khalfani-Cox: Vigilant Warrior Against Debt

LIFE 6. Tamika Stembridge: Why Me? 10. I Am dfree® dfree® influencers talk about how they put dfree® into action.

16. Improve Your Health and Increase Your Financial Fitness with Dr. Ro 18. Life Tools & Tips

GENERATIONAL WEALTH

WOMEN EMPOWERMENT

25. Become a Victor, Not a Victim, of Your Finances

32. From One Mother to Another

27. Wealth Tools & Tips

Advice from Media Executive Michele Thornton

MONEY 19. Lynnette Khalfani-Cox: Vigilant Warrior Against Debt 22. A Talk With Yourself 24. Money Tools & Tips 4 | LIVING

YOUNG MONEY 28. On the Road to Billionaire, Your First Stop Should be Thousandaire

36. Get Control: Lessons From Our Grandmothers 38. #BALANCEFORBETTER for International Women’s Day


6

28 INSPIRATION

OUR PEOPLE

40. Close Knit God’s Gurls Talk Music, Ministry and Money

50. Financial Dis-ease: Don’t Feel Bad Unless You Don’t Change Your Situation

NEST EGG

52. FINAL WORD with Pastor Trevor Hyde, Jr.

45. Live a Richer Life by Planning for Death 47. 7 Habits of Financially Free People by Maddie Brooks

ON THE COVER:

dfree® advocates: Carmen McClendon, Delvin Joyce and Denise Pyfrom share what it means to be part of the life changing movement.

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LIFE

THE FEARLESS TAMIKA STEMBRIDGE TALKS MONEY, TAKING RISKS & LEARNING FROM EXPERIENCE Meet Tamika Stembridge — an attorney, MBA

life. The remarkable thing is that she recognizes,

and marketing guru who serves as the Executive

and in many cases, takes them. Tamika is always

Director of dfree . She describes herself

asking, “Why me?” When in fact, why not her? Why

somewhere between a Black Panther and

not us? When discussing her life, it was amazing

Beyonce. She is also strong, highly educated

to learn how willing she is to take calculated risks.

and fearless. Committed to personal integrity

As is often the case, to truly understand Tamika

and success, Tamika is not only willing to take

you must go back to her origins.

®

the road less traveled, she is willing to blaze her own path.

BIG SISTER

Tamika is the eldest of three daughters. She RISK TAKER

lived in a well-rounded home, which was rich

Tamika is the first person to acknowledge the

with things of value that matter including love,

numerous opportunities that have come in her

education and a great work ethic. Tamika’s

6 | LIVING


mother was a corporate employee, and her father

After four years of dividing her time between

was a truck driver. A pivotal and unexpected

the corporate and the nonprofit worlds, she was

point in their life came when both parents were

offered a full-time position at Communities in

laid off. It set off a financial storm that eventually

Schools of NJ (CISNJ). This opportunity came

ended with divorce.

with a $50,000 pay cut, but she didn’t change her lifestyle. As Tamika said, “I lived in the same

Even though Tamika was unaware of her parents’

house, drove the same car and cashed out

situation, it affected her, and she always makes

money from my 401K to cover the difference.”

sure to include this puzzle piece in the telling of her story. She firmly believes that we all need

FINANCIAL DIFFICULTIES

to be financially prepared for every stage of life

Tamika discovered the position was not a good fit

because bad things happen to good people.

for her within a year. That realization corresponded with an invitation to apply to law school. Never

In spite of the divorce, Tamika and her sisters

having considered the law, it was exciting and

graduated at the top of their classes and attended

allowed for her love of hip-hop to be matched with

Spelman College on full-tuition scholarships with

a career as an entertainment attorney.

very few undergraduate loans. Each of them work in their chosen fields: one sister is a math

As a law student, Tamika continued her shopaholic

teacher and the other is a social worker.

ways, which led to some difficult lessons with credit cards. As she said, “None of us have money issues, we have life management issues. If you fix your life your finances will work out.”

During Tamika’s last year in law school, she worked a few days a week on the business side of a fashion line in New York. The Devil Wears Prada RISING STAR

After graduating from Spelman, Tamika was recruited to work in Corporate America with the salary and benefits she was seeking. Her free time was spent mentoring young people and trying to make a difference in their lives.

is her favorite movie, and it was like a dream to work in the field. As graduation drew near the fashion line offered her a position as their fifth employee and in-house counsel. Although it was an exciting offer, Tamika considered the totals of her student loans and realized that the more

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LIFE

lucrative offer from a big law firm in Philadelphia

you know you will hate. She got the formal offer

was the responsible choice.

the Friday before the Philadelphia job was set to start. It seemed like her happily ever after.

After almost two years, Tamika realized that she wasn’t wholly fulfilled at her dream job. It was around this time that she crashed her car, likely because she was stressed and not thinking clearly. Even though she lived around the corner from the train station, Tamika purchased a new car because she thought it would make her feel better, but it didn’t. Eventually, Tamika decided to leave this job too.

SEARCHING FOR MORE

After being on her own for about a year, Tamika reached out for pastoral care with Rev. Dr. Soaries. He was her pastor, but they had never HAND OF GOD

met one-on-one. Their meeting was exactly

After Tamika had taken the bar and two weeks

what she needed. Rev. Dr. Soaries provided her

before she was ready to move to Philadelphia to

guidance to improve her life and even hired her

start at the law firm, she received a lifechanging

to handle some legal work for him. A month later,

call. Tamika’s boss at the fashion line, who

Rev. Dr. Soaries included Tamika in a meeting

was head of production, connected Tamika

about dfree®. She knew he would need someone

to her hairdresser whose husband was then

to manage it and she offered herself. And as

the manager of CeeLo Green. A meeting was

they say, the rest is history. Four years later she

arranged between Tamika and Blue Williams at

is the Executive Director of the dfree® Global

his management company. During the meeting,

Foundation. She loves the work. dfree® started

Blue discussed an upcoming partnership with

with 250 churches and now has more than 3,000.

Chris Lighty, who ran Violator Management and

And dfree® worked for her own life too – finally

managed artists such as Sean “Diddy” Combs

helping her balance things that once seemed

and Missy Elliott. Blue invited Tamika to be their

elusive. Now, Tamika gets to use her personal

third arm. It is not often that your dream job is

testimony and dfree® principles to help change

offered two weeks before the start of a career

other peoples’ lives.

8 | LIVING


LIVING THE GOOD LIFE

Tamika wants everyone to know that “the life that you truly desire is within your reach. Financial peace is great, and none of us are meant to work and die.” She said to, “Get clear on your desire from God, take inventory and one action step at a time. It is possible.”

To

keep

up

with

Tamika

follow

her

on

Instagram @TheFreeBlackGirl and on Twitter @OGFreeBlackGirl. Also read her blogs on mydfree.org.

NOW JOIN NEW

BILLION DOLLAR CHALLENGE TAMIKA TALKS GROUP to gain all the #FreeBlackGirl money moves that keep you successful and informed.

BILLIONDOLLARPAYDOWN.COM LIVING

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I AM

DENISE PYFROM

FEATURE STORY

ASSOCIATE MANAGER, GLOBAL PARTNERSHIPS NBA

dfree® INFLUENCERS TALK ABOUT HOW

Preparation is the ability to establish a specific

THEY PUT dfree® INTO ACTION

goal and devise a plan that is detailed enough

It doesn’t matter if you are at the beginning of

to enable you to accomplish that goal.

your financial life, in the middle or at the end.

Sometimes you must work hard to create a

There is a way to gain control and live the life

plan, and other times you’re fortunate enough

that you imagined. Sometimes, however, even

to have a loved one, friend or mentor create

the thought of addressing financial issues can

one for you.

seem overwhelming. If you’re already facing a downward spiral, it may be tempting just

Meet Denise Pyfrom, a New Jersey native

to give up and hope for the best. Yet, many

whose parents are first-generation college

people who have faced similar struggles have

graduates who created an education plan

relied upon dfree® for life-changing guidance.

that would help shape her life. The drive and guidance paid off. In Pyfrom’s current role,

In this article, you will hear from three individuals

as associate manager of global partnerships

who embody the dfree

spirit. They all have

at the National Basketball Association, she

wisdom to share, particularly about three

manages the marketing relationships with

key elements of gaining control: preparation,

Fortune 100 brands. In this capacity, she

direction and process. Their stories should help

overseas

you see your situation from a new vantage

helps bring organizations together to promote

point, so that you too can get control.

shared values and drive business goals.

DENISE PYFROM SAVE MONEY

®

-- TAKE EVERY OPPORTUNITY TO

multimillion-dollar

contracts

and

ON HER OWN

Pyfrom learned about the dfree® movement

It is incredibly empowering once you realize how to manage your finances. 10 | LIVING


at church, as dfree® founder Dr. Soaries is her

save money. I, 100 percent, should have lived at

pastor. The messages were also reiterated at

home longer and done the commute, but I was

home, which provided a foundation that would

so wrapped up in the glitz and glamour of NYC.”

guide her as she ventured away from home. That decision aside, Pyfrom is focused on “It is incredibly empowering once you realize

“having a robust savings account. Not just

how to manage your finances. It’s not always

with one bank, but with multiple resources to

going to be easy. But so long as you find a

diversify your portfolio, like a 401K.”

financial strategy that works for you, that is one of the most freeing moments in a person’s life,” said Pyfrom.

FINANCIAL ADVICE

Pyfrom said, “Wealth isn’t necessarily tied to how much you make but how much money you can keep from what you make. How much can you afford to save, and can you afford to save a little bit more than that? Be as consistent as possible to see long term growth.”

Denise recommends the same advice she gives

the

professional

basketball

players

she interacts with, “Do not make your own personal, financial and life decisions based on what you see your peers do. Don’t try to live off their reality. You have to be honest with yourself and what will work for you, both in the long-term and the short-term.”

LOOKING BACK WHILE MOVING FORWARD

Pyfrom acknowledges she made several smart financial moves, but if she could’ve provided her younger self any advice, “I would have told

NJ chapters of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc. members attend Leadership Training

myself to capitalize on every opportunity to LIVING

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Currently, Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc. has 189 Billion Dollar Challenge Chapters nationally and has reduced over $4 Million in debt. CARMEN MCCLENDON DELTA SIGMA THETA CHAIR, NATIONAL ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT SUBCOMMITTEE

CARMEN MCCLENDON, CHAIR OF NATIONAL ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT SUBCOMMITTEE

-

FOLLOWING THE

PATH BLAZED BY HER GRANDPARENTS

investment of knowledge and wisdom that they poured into me about finances, education and taking care of yourself. Not for the here and now but for the future, that is what I want

A central component to getting control is

my legacy to be,” said McClendon.

receiving direction from people who have taken the journey before you. They can

McClendon pondered her story and said, “I’m

provide information that is road-tested and

a third-generation property owner. I was given

outlines potential pitfalls. The value of this

property, not because I earned it, but because

material is never truly known until the mission

I inherited it. I want my legacy to be based on

is completed and an assessment of all the

the foundation [my family] laid.”

landmines averted has been calculated. Not one to only focus on her family McClendon Meet Carmen McClendon, of Dallas, Texas,

said, “I want to extend that [legacy] to the

who was raised in a family with a strong

communities in which I live, work and serve

prosperity mindset. Her grandparents owned

because so many of us in the African American

property and worked it to create income and

community think there is nothing beyond what

economic security for the family’s future. They

we see and think right now, but it is possible.

were intent on building up wealth so that

My grandparents were not formally educated;

future generations would have less struggle

my dad had no degree. I was fortunate to get

and create a continuity of asset expansion.

an undergraduate degree and an M.B.A. I can’t let them down,” said McClendon.

“I want my legacy to be a replication of my grandparents and parents because of the 12 | LIVING


DEVELOPING THE ROAD MAP FOR DELTA SIGMA

if you apply yourself.” She also credits the

THETA SORORITY, INC.

practical approach to financial empowerment

McClendon, a member of Delta Sigma Theta

and accessible support provided to members

Sorority, Inc. (DST), was selected to head

by dfree® as a key ingredient in that success.

the

National

Economic

Development

Subcommittee of the Program Planning and Development Committee leading the Financial Fortitude strategy to transform the communities in which we live, work and serve. Through its partnership with dfree®, DST’s Billion Dollar Debt and Billion Dollar Wealth challenge launched with respective aims of

I was given property, not because I earned it, but because I inherited it.

financial freedom and wealth and property acquisition. These initiatives have engaged

The same legacy vision McClendon holds for

more than 800 members of the sorority and

her family she extends to DST and community

the surrounding community, motivating them to

participants in the program. “We want to see

reduce more than a whopping $4M in debt.

our children’s children be financially free,” she said, noting that the endgame is not just debt

McClendon

notes

the

success

of

these

initiatives “demonstrates what you can achieve

repayment, but long-term property ownership and good investments.

MICHELLE DUTTON

CARMEN MCCLENDON

TONYA MURAGURI

DELTA SIGMA THETA SORORITY, INC. MEMBER, NATIONAL ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT SUBCOMMITTEE

DELTA SIGMA THETA CHAIR, NATIONAL ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT SUBCOMMITTEE

MEMBER, NATIONAL ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT SUBCOMMITTEE

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DELVIN JOYCE FINANCIAL PLANNER PRUDENTIAL ADVISORS

We have to understand the power of insurance.

DELVIN JOYCE

--

WHERE THERE IS A WILL,

early in his rookie year, “Just because I can

THERE’S A WAY

afford something doesn’t mean I should

In life, there are processes to getting things

purchase it. That turning point put me on a

done correctly. Reading the instructions is not

path to saving enough money to buy my first

required, and guessing is an option available to

home — a home I still live in 15 years later.”

you. However, you can expect some problems when you don’t take the time needed to learn

Following his sports career, he started working

the process of taking control of your financial

as a financial planner for Prudential advisors.

life. While it may all turn out just fine, there is

His background in economics and finance

also a chance that skipped steps will be costly

paved the way.

and impact your legacy. GENERATIONAL WEALTH

Here to provide advice for your financial

Estate planning is one of the best ways to ensure

story is Delvin Joyce. A former NFL player

you leave a legacy and create generational

for the NY Giants, he experienced an increase

wealth. Joyce said, “Make sure all the things

beyond anything he ever imagined. During his

that you have set up will pass to your heirs and

professional sports tenure, he was making more

beneficiaries as efficiently as possible.”

money weekly than he had seen in his life. Statistically,

only

32

percent

of

African

Unlike many of Joyce’s colleagues, he didn’t

Americans conduct estate planning. Many

spend his money on luxury items, but learned

people believe they have no assets or property

14 | LIVING


of any value, and they don’t think about purchasing life insurance. Joyce said, “As a community, we have to understand the power of life insurance. It is a miracle because I can pay a premium and sign a contract and if I pass away money comes into my family.”

Often when people think about large sums of money such as $1 million in insurance or more, they become convinced that someone is going to try to kill them. Joyce recommends that people stop being influenced by shows like CSI and Dateline. “If your economic value to your family is $50,000 than we recommend $1 million in insurance. For every $50,000 add another million.” decisions after you have passed. Another question that Joyce often gets regards to whether it’s better to save for a child’s college education or for retirement. “As they say on the airplane during the safety training, ‘Put your face mask on before assisting anyone else with theirs.’ Your children can apply for student loans, but there is no retirement loan.”

THE HIGH COST OF NOT HAVING AN ESTATE PLAN

Joyce shared, “Not having an estate plan is still a plan because the state in which you reside will put your assets into probate court. Fundamentally, having a will is the 101 version of a financial plan.” Creating a will is usually inexpensive and saves your loved ones the

Often the thing standing in the way of making important life decisions is fear and misconceptions regarding meeting with a financial planner. Joyce said, “Most financial experts will give you a complimentary meeting or free advice to set you on the right path to financial freedom.”

Only 32 percent of African Amercians conduct estate planning.

time and heartache of having to make tough LIVING

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LIFE

IMPROVE YOUR HEALTH & INCREASE YOUR FINANCIAL FITNESS WITH DR. RO “There is often a misconception that only wealthy people can be healthy.” Dr. Ro said. “Having a lot of money is not necessary. What is necessary is your commitment to the Dr. Ro shares advice on improving your body

process. Where your commitment is placed

and wallet at the same time.

your behavior will follow and actions will lead to the change you are seeking.”

Dr. Ro also known as Rovenia M. Brock, Ph.D. is a 20+ year nutritional coach and the author of

Dr. Soaries said he was, “Fascinated [by Dr.

Lose Your Final 15, a book dedicated to weight

Ro] because many of us believe our inability

loss in 15-pound increments. Her interest in the

to take care of ourselves is directly related

field was born from a family medical history

to our income and our financial capacity and

consisting of high blood pressure, coronary

it isn’t. We want to dispel the myth that you

artery disease and peripheral vascular disease

have to be unhealthy if you are not wealthy.”

often known as poor circulation.

Dr. Ro said, “People in our community expect the worst in life that God has to offer them.” It

Dr. Ro stopped by the In the Black Podcast to

is time to change that thinking and understand

discuss health and financial fitness with dfree®

that knowledge is power by learning about

Founder and CEO Dr. DeForest B. Soaries Jr.

your family medical history. By doing so, you

and Tamika Stembridge, ESQ. Hear the entire

can develop tools and make choices that can

podcast here.

improve your health.

16 | LIVING


Dr. Ro provided 3 tips that anyone can start using today:

1. Plan your meals in advance. This action provides two major accomplishments. First, healthy options are selected and second, it reduces your spending when you shop with

People in our community expect the worst in life that God has to offer them.

a list. You are less likely to make impulsive purchases and save money.

2. Prepare meals in bulk and freeze the extra for another time. It costs less money to purchase larger quantities of food, such as chicken or fish.

3. Eat regularly and arm yourself with snack packs. Carry protein and dried fruit whenever you go out and drink lots of water.

Dr. Ro’s mission is to help 1 million people collectively lose 15 million pounds. She said, “The first thing is just to decide to live the best life possible for you. You are the one and only one that can make this decision.” If you are interested in joining her movement visit her website at https://everythingro.com/.

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LIFESTYLE TIPS

1

DECIDE THAT YOU WANT A LIFE FULL OF MEANING and purpose so that you can align your priorities including financial goals.

2

RE-EVALUATE LIFESTYLE CHOICES. For instance, if you pay for premium cable and spend a lot of time watching shows does that satisfy your life goals? Can you think of better uses for that time and money?

3

VOLUNTEER IN AN AREA FOR WHICH YOU HOLD A PASSION. Volunteering can lead to other opportunities including: jobs and networking, advice and tips, resource sharing, etc.

18 | LIVING

READ Say Yes to No Debt: 12 Steps to Financial Freedom by DeForest B. Soaries, Jr. “The idea that debt is actually slavery is offensive to all of our sensibilities,” says Soaries, “but when we continue to spend what we don’t have, charge what we don’t need...” www.amazon.com

READY, SET, GO TOOL

LIFE

TOOLS & TIPS Does your current lifestyle support what you want out of life? Do you even know what your life goals are? It’s time to adjust your attitude and focus on what’s most important. When you take the time to create and prioritize your life goals, you can then develop strategies to achieve them. dfree® helps you on this journey and to get your finances in shape so that you have the money you need to support your new life.

Take a few deep breaths and a few minutes to think about where you would spend your time if you did not have to worry about money. Would you take more vacations with your family? Would you do more charity work? Would you bring your ideas for something society needs to fruition and start a business? Let’s Move Forward Together and Say Yes to No Debt.


MONEY

LYNNETTE KHALFANI-COX: VIGILANT WARRIOR AGAINST DEBT One of the most popular questions The

your confidence in yourself and your ability to

Money Coach Lynnette Khalfani-Cox gets

make smart financial choices.” The book offers

asked is how to improve one’s credit score.

a 30-day plan to jumpstart your financial health.

While inquirers may be hoping for a quick fix, establishing and maintaining good credit

FROM DEBT TO DEBT-FREE

requires thoughtful action, or as Lynnette

Even though Lynnette was once a financial

likes to call it, a game plan.

journalist and is now debt free, she had to climb her way out of $100,000 in credit card

“It’s incumbent upon us to learn how to

debt – much of which she created while in

manage credit and debt wisely,” she said. In

college. She faced a car repossession, charge-

her New York Times bestseller, Zero Debt:

offs, collection accounts, late payments and

The Ultimate Guide to Financial Freedom,

low credit scores before taking three years to

she writes: “Excessive debt is an unnecessary

“make it to the other side.” Once there, her

weight that, left unchecked, just gets harder

lifestyle changes have kept her debt free for

and harder to bear. Debt holds you back from

more than a decade.

living the life you want to live and doing the things you truly want to do. Debt destroys

Now, she shares her success and practical

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financial tips with thousands through her website,

numbers, has made more than half of all

askthemoneycoach.com, media appearances

Americans victims of identity theft. Even if the

and workshops including dfree® conferences.

hackers haven’t used the information yet, they

She said she openly shares the nasty details of

always can. So, if you haven’t yet, one of the

her debt so that others won’t be ashamed of

first things you need to do to protect yourself

their financial mistakes.

and your credit is to respond to the breach, Lynnette advises.

“I also want you to know that you’re not alone in your debt woes, and that no matter how bad

Equifax, which joins Experian and Transunion

it seems, there is always a way out,” she writes.

as one of the three major U.S. credit bureaus,

“I also reveal my story because I want you to

has set up a website with instructions for

take an honest look at your own spending

finding out if your data was compromised

patterns.”

and what to do about it: https://www. equifaxsecurity2017.com/. Lynnette advises

Lynnette says her experience has shown that

everyone, not just those compromised, to

most debtors fall into one of two categories:

take advantage of any available one-year free

those who overspend and are poor money

credit protection services. But she says there

mangers or those who have suffered from

are other methods that are also available for

one or more of the “Dreaded Ds:” downsizing,

free if you’re a victim, including adding a credit

divorce, death in the family of the main

alert and/or a credit freeze to your report (see

breadwinner or disease. In any case, it’s

https://askthemoneycoach.com/2017/09/

possible to turn things around but Lynnette

protect-credit-equifax-data-breach/).

calls for active vigilance. “Monitor your bank and credit statements. “Who’s going to care more about your financial

Make sure there are no charges you haven’t

and your credit health and your overall

authorized,” Lynnette told USA Today. “Actively

economic picture than you do? Nobody,” she

monitor your credit all of the time, month after

recently said during a USA Today interview

month on all three credit bureaus.”

regarding the 2017 Equifax data breach. Although

everyone

should

get

their

STAY VIGILANT ABOUT YOUR FINANCES

annual, free credit reports from the three

That breach, along with others where hackers

bureaus (available from websites like www.

stole vital information such as social security

annualcreditreport.com) and monitor their

20 | LIVING


COUNTERING THE EFFECTS OF ‘THIN CREDIT’ OR

advises paying the nominal fees or finding out

NO CREDIT

how else you may qualify for free reports so

If you’re trying to rebuild or establish a credit

that you can check your reports and scores

profile, Lynnette says one of the best things you

more often.

can do is get a secured credit card, use it every

MONEY

credit scores (CreditSesame.com) , Lynnette

month and pay the bills on time. A secured credit card is one where your limit is only as high as the cash deposit you put on account with a bank or credit card issuer in order to open a secured card. The great advantage is that the positive activity is reported to the credit bureaus.

“You can also use a technique called piggybacking, where you get added as an authorized user or co-signer on someone else’s credit,” She said she knows people are concerned when they have to pay monitoring fees, but most are worth it. She also said that many states offer

Lynnette said. “Of course, make sure they have good credit. Their good payment activity can help to boost your credit rating.”

protected groups free credit reports such as: people on government assistance; senior citizens; people age 16 or younger; members of the military; people who are victims of identity theft; and, spouses and dependents of identity theft victims. Seven states even offer free credit freezes including: Colorado, Indiana, Maine, New Jersey, New York, North Carolina and South Carolina.

Ultimately, “there is a pathway to perfect credit but you have to take it step by step and learn more about your finances,” Lynnette says. “Can you picture the day when all your credit card statements show zero balances?” Lynnette asks. “It can and will happen, sooner than you think, if you lay the groundwork for your financial success.”

Another important tip related to the breach is to file your taxes early in 2019, before crooks have a chance to use your identity to try and steal your refund.

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A TALK WITH YOURSELF DISCOVER YOUR MONEY HABITS by DeForest B. Soaries, Jr.

We’ve been led to believe that knowing more

The problem we have is a lack of discipline,

makes us do better. But when it comes to finances,

a lack of focus, a lack of a strategy and lack

adjusting your attitude is crucial to doing better.

of will power to change. Our problem is not

You can know how to balance a checkbook but

informational, it is attitudinal. Our problem is

that knowledge isn’t sufficing to motivate you to

not educational, it’s cultural. So, the steps we

actually do it. You can understand compound

take to address the problem must address the

interest but not put a dime in the bank or in an

psychological, cultural, spiritual and emotional

investment that grows with interest.

drivers that affect and impact our financial wellness.

You owe it to yourself to take charge of all of your financial matters. You owe it to yourself to

One of the most well-known biblical parables

know how much money you have coming in and

is that of the prodigal son. In this story, we find

how much money you have going out. You owe

a timeless family triangle: an industrious father

it to yourself to have a financial snapshot and

who has done well for himself, an impatient

goals with dates attached to those goals. You

son who makes a fool of himself, and a jealous

have to get a handle on the situation so you can

brother who gets beside himself. The story’s

become financially free item by item, bill by bill,

catalyst is the demand by an impulsive young

task by task. My life changed completely once I

man for immediate access to the inheritance

took control of the resources that I had. Yours

he’ll receive upon his father’s death.

will too. After the young man gets his money, he quickly The problem that we have as people of the

turns his new prosperity into devastating

modern age is not a problem of information.

poverty. It doesn’t take long for him to burn

22 | LIVING


it. This written evidence will help you answer

makes a total mess of his life. Yet, this prodigal

the question of “where does my money go?”

son’s core problem is not immorality; his core

and help you start identifying what you need

problem is impatience. And impatience is not

to change. This practice of writing down an

an intellectual problem. Impatience is a spiritual,

inventory of expenditures applies equally well to

cultural, emotional and psychological problem.

your spiritual life. Becoming more aware of our

His father described him as having died!

thoughts and how they translate into attitudes

MONEY

through his cash with reckless living. In short, he

and get actualized in our behavior can benefit It’s impatience that drives us to buy things we

every area of our lives.

can’t afford, to use high-interest credit cards. When we spend money that we don’t have,

For the prodigal son to truly change, he knew he

money that we don’t know when we are going

had to return to his father’s house where there

to get, we’re experiencing a hellish existence.

would be rules and responsibilities. He knew

When the prodigal son realized the mess that he

he would have to submit to his father’s way of

made, he escaped from his self-imposed hell by

looking at life. But he also realized submission

going home to his father. He wanted to change.

was a better alternative than staying in hell, and his father welcomed him back as if he had just

If

we’re

going

to

get

out

of

our

been to heaven.

financial hell, we have to own the bad current

Is it time to humble yourself and get on the

hole we’re in. It’s humbling, but so is having a car

journey to a better life? The barrier to financial

repossessed or losing a home in a foreclosure.

freedom is debt. You have to have the kind of

It’s time to tell the truth about ourselves to

talk with yourself that gives you the courage you

ourselves. We have to talk to ourselves and

need to Say Yes to No Debt. It’s a life transforming

make sure no one else is listening so we can

commitment that you’ll never regret.

choices

we’ve

made

and

the

really tell the truth. This is how we get better spiritually and make a permanent adjustment in our attitude.

One way to begin the conversation with yourself is to compile a written list of everything you buy, everything you spend money on. Think through what you spend and why you spend

You owe it to yourself to take charge of all of your financial matters. LIVING

| 23


BUDGETING TIPS

1

UNDERSTAND THAT THE GOAL OF A BUDGET IS TO ENABLE you to

spend less than you earn so that you can save money to support the things you really want out of life.

2

TRACK YOUR SPENDING FOR A WEEK OR A MONTH BY WRITING EACH and

every purchase down. Review spending to determine what you spent on wants versus needs.

3

USE SMART GOALS to create a realistic spending plan that will help you stick to your budget.

MONEY MATTERS TOOL

DO Exercises in dfree® Lifestyle by DeForest B. Soaries, Jr. “My goal is that you will discover more about yourself than you do about money by the time you complete this experience. That is why I call it the dfree® lifestyle.” www.amazon.com

24 | LIVING

MONEY TOOLS & TIPS

When is the last time you created a household budget and stuck to it? If you have a budget, is it aligned with your life goals? A budget is a critical tool for life advancement. Today, with easy access to the internet and mobile apps, there’s an abundance of tools available to help you create a budget, track your spending and stick to your plans. In order to stick to a budget, you have to be committed. You have to maintain your focus and strengthen your patience so that you can sacrifice shortterm desires in order to achieve long-term growth and success.


WEALTH

BECOME A VICTOR, NOT A VICTIM, OF YOUR FINANCES by DeForest B. Soaries, Jr.

Take the challenge. Push the culture forward. Be an active member of dfree® and Join Billion Dollar Challenge.

the right way. People who know me know that I say, all of the time, don’t let the future catch you by surprise. My insurance story reminds me of the biblical parable of bags of gold in

When I was in my twenties, I was approached by

Matthew 25:14-30.

an agent from a reputable insurance company. He offered me an opportunity to invest in a fund

There, a journeyman is entrusting his wealth to

that provided both insurance and investment

his servants. He gives five bags of gold to one,

opportunities, and I took it. I wrote one check,

two to another and one to the last. Upon his

opened the account, and then never paid

return, he discovers the servants with the most

another dime. If I had continued with that plan

gold both doubled the man’s wealth while the

– instead of buying expensive clothes, instead

servant who was given only one bag buried it

of buying luxury cars on a small salary, instead

in the ground and gave it back to him. He calls

of eating in fancy restaurants – if I had stayed

the first two servants “good and faithful” while

in that fund faithfully for the next 40 years, I

he calls the last “wicked” and “lazy.”

would be a multimillionaire. In the end, we can come up with all kinds of My problem was not that I couldn’t afford the

excuses for why we’re in debt. But until we

plan. My problem was that I was not thinking

change our mindset, take responsibility, and

Don’t just join the movement, become an active member in our economic empowerment. LIVING WWW.BILLIONDOLLARPAYDOWN.COM

| 25


WEALTH

adopt a strategy for changing our situation we will

will pay you to water their plants, walk their

remain in a wicked, lazy state while others prosper.

dogs and cats and wash their cars. I have a buddy who has a big water tank on the back of

Getting control of our finances is empowering.

a truck and he’ll come to your house and wash

It’s also much more than just paying off

your car. Whether it’s baking sweet potato pies

debt and getting better interest rates. You

or drawing nice art that people will buy, you

have to have a strategy or you’ll end up like

can use your gifts, talents, skills and passions

professional basketball players, who make

to connect to people who will pay you enough

plenty of money yet 60 percent of them file for

for a second or even a primary job.

bankruptcy within five years of retirement. The reality is, if you make $500,000 per year and

You can use the power you have to access

spend $500,001 per year, you’re broke. That’s

financial management resources, many of

a whole lot of wasted bags of gold.

which are free like the Billion Dollar Challenge. When I was working to change my life by

So, you have to know your wants from your

changing my finances, I had to track things on

needs, you have to plug spending leaks, you

paper. Later, I was able to open an account with

have to have a budget, you have to review your

an online investment company and now I buy

debt paydown to revise it or stay on track, and

and trade stocks on my phone. Today, nobody

you have to think about how you can generate

should feel powerless because resources are

new income.

available and ample. When we feel powerless, we feel hopeless. When we feel hopeless, we

Not only do you have the power to take money

don’t even look for solutions.

you’ve saved and pay off debt (from cutting down on wants, plugging spending leaks and

You have the ultimate power over your own

using the snowball method to stop making

life and you can deal with any obstacle or

just minimum payments), you have the power

challenge if you have a strategy. Won’t you

of increase. You have the power to look at

join me today by becoming a victor, instead of

yourself and figure out what you do well, what

a victim, of your finances?

you love to do and who will pay you to do one of those things.

We live in a service economy. There are people who will pay for just about anything. People Don’t just join the movement, become an active member in 26 | LIVING our economic empowerment. WWW.BILLIONDOLLARPAYDOWN.COM


GROWTH

TOOLS & TIPS Changes to the tax code will

There are several websites,

affect your 2018 fillings, but

including those by tax service

how? It’s best to plan now so you

companies, that have tax

can adjust your spending where

calculators, which allow you to

needed. Because some of the

plug in your numbers so you

changes affect tax deductions

can get a good sense of how

for state and local taxes. Two

the new laws will affect you.

people earning the same income living in different states will be

Find tax bill calculators at:

affected differently.

> IRS & State Calculator 20052019 > Nerd Wallet

DEBT RELIEF TIPS

1 2

MAKE POWER CHANGES by choosing areas

3

LEARN ABOUT THE NEW TAX CODE, particularly deductions. You may not be

where you can cut back to pay off debt faster.

CREATE AN ANNUAL, QUARTERLY OR MONTHLY HABIT OF SELLING OR DONATING GOODS that you no longer need.

claiming money to which you are entitled or you may be paying too much in taxes by doing things such as not claiming the right number of exemptions.

GROW YOUR MONEY TOOL

If you’re like many Americans you are drowning in personal debt, looking for a way out. The Billion Dollar Challenge (BDC) is a dfree® interactive web tool that makes it easy for people to change their lifestyles, use reliable budgeting techniques and get rid of debt as part of a journey toward financial freedom www.billiondollarpaydown.com. The BDC’s goal is to educate, inspire and enable participants to collectively pay down $1 billion in consumer debt. The challenge is a free, national economic campaign made up of participants that are part of the dfree® Financial Freedom Movement as well as participants who sign up through the BDC website. BDC also provides support, through groups and rewards. JOIN THE CHALLENGE WITH A FRIEND:

www.billiondollarpaydown.com

LIVING

| 27


YOUNG MONEY

ON THE ROAD TO BILLIONAIRE, YOUR FIRST STOP SHOULD BE THOUSANDAIRE Daydreaming about billions is a common pastime.

It’s

thrilling

to

imagine

actions behind your objectives.

having

whatever we want at any time. Although joining

Start by writing down your goal. Research

the ranks of the 2,208 billionaires in the world

shows written goals are 42 percent more likely

seems impossible, so we just keep dreaming.

to be achieved. According to Think and Grow

But, did you realize the word “impossible” can

Rich Author Napoleon Hill, “A goal is a dream

also be read as “I’m possible”?

with a deadline.”

An example of a good money goal: I will open a savings account and save $1,000 in a year. Situations vary, but based on the above goal, savings of at least $2.74 a day or $19.18 a week will be required. To achieve success, track your The difference between dreamers and doers is

progress. For help in setting up your monetary

action. As Yoda, from Star Wars, says, “Do or

breakdown, check out this site to figure out

do not. There is no try.” So, if you are ready to

the exact number of days that fall between

start building your financial empire, make your

two dates: https://planetcalc.com/274/.

first stop at the thousandaire milestone. While $1,000 is a small sum in comparison to your

Using a notebook, write daily entries about

ultimate goal, it shows the power of putting

the goal, such as: feelings for the day, action

28 | LIVING


steps taken, lessons learned or even if the bar

2. When you get money as a gift, don’t spend

needs to be increased. The more you focus on

frivolously, consider it a capital investment

your goal and invest time the easier it will be

in yourself. Spending some money on yourself

to reach.

is fine, but always invest something in your future. Think beyond today and plan for the

Regardless of your situation create a budget.

life you want to live as a billionaire. Consider

It will assist in tracking spending. This may

putting half or more of that money into your

seem like a pain, but you track your Pinterest,

savings. Future you will thank you.

or Instagram followers so think about this the same way. Consider all the places you spend

3. Be the one to plan outings for your friends

money such as entertainment, shopping and

to ensure that events are economically priced.

restaurants, as well as any bills. Set realistic

Start by looking at the list of free events in your

amounts in each category. If your goal is

community, which could include concerts, free

a priority, consider making a drastic cut in

museum days and art events. Saving money

spending to increase savings.

doesn’t mean the fun ends.

Consider your income sources. If you don’t

4. Use YouTube and Pinterest to learn how to

have any, you need to get one quickly. Reflect

DIY (Do It Yourself). People teach lessons in

on your skills and determine how to monetize

how to do almost anything online. Instead of

them. Offer services to your community

pricey mani-pedis get your friends to meet at

including mowing lawns, babysitting, walking

your home and give them to each other. Think

dogs or teaching a class in something you know

about other things you can do for yourself.

well. You can also get a more traditional job. A word to the wise, some people may try to FOUR TIPS TO SAVE MONEY

stop you from reaching your goal. Others

1. Save all your change, even the coins you

might not see the value or have the discipline

find, in a container. Once the jar is full, take

to save money. Decide now to stand firm with

it to the bank. Have you noticed all change is

your choice. If it were easy everyone would do

stamped, “In God we Trust”? With each found

it. Success is at hand and you are on the road

coin consider that God’s telling you he’s got

to becoming a billionaire.

your back and you can reach your goal.

LIVING

| 29


FIVE IMPORTANT TIPS TO ASSIST WITH YOUR THOUSANDAIRE JOURNEY

1. Be grateful that you have set this goal. Did you know it’s impossible to feel grateful and negative simultaneously? Just keep moving forward and it will all come together.

2. Celebrate your accomplishments. Each time you put a deposit into your savings account verbalize your pride at yourself for the dedication to the goal. Recognized success causes us to thrive.

3. Read, listen to podcasts and talk to people who are financially successful. Others have been down the path you are embarking on, and they can assist with potential pitfalls and shortcuts.

4. Find a friend with the same goal. It can be a relative, a church friend or someone from dfree® Young Money. It’s great to have someone to talk to about your triumphs and struggles.

5. Don’t touch your savings. This is the seed money to be used for getting you to a billion dollars. Down the road, you may invest it, but this is not spending money.

If you start making financial changes today that most people won’t, then you’ll be able to live the way most people can’t for the rest of your life. One day you won’t be dreaming of being a billionaire, you’ll just be one. 30 | LIVING

“Impossible” can also be read as I’m possible.


YOUNG MONEY

Jumpstart the Journey to Financial Freedom dfree Young Money is a movement designed to awaken and educate youth and young adults ages 12–27 on the importance of incorporating financial freedom as a daily lifestyle. ®

ORE AT LEARN M

ey

on rg/youngm .o e e fr d y m

Our goal is to reach youth and young adults where they are, through mediums and with messaging that is age — and interest — appropriate in order to authentically jumpstart their journey to Financial Freedom.

LIVING

| 31


WOMEN EMPOWERMENT

FROM ONE MOTHER TO ANOTHER by Michele Thornton How many articles have you read in the past

I grew up in Oakland, California. My mom and

week, month, year? What have you done with

dad worked hard to send my brother and me

that information? Before you read this article,

to the best schools. In 2016, I wrote my first

decide that you will use these words to build

book, “Stratechic,” and I shared my story of

a plan and then execute it. It’s amazing what

how I did well in school and played basketball

happens when we decide to walk differently.

on the varsity team yet didn’t make any plans

I pray this article inspires you to make the

to go to college. Instead, I chose to get a job at

necessary plans and adjustments today!

a local naval base. This choice is critical to my story because I see this happening to so many young people. I was making decent money

32 | LIVING


but I began to accrue debt. When I wanted

appeared before me and was deathly silent.

to go back to school, I had so much debt that I

I could see the disappointment on his face.

couldn’t afford to quit my job. I was also in a high-

When I woke up, I remembered every detail

profile relationship at the time with a professional

of that dream.” As a result, I chose to end

athlete. Of course, I had to buy the best clothes

my relationship, I lost weight and enrolled in

and shoes to look the part. I was basically

college. To go to school full time, I worked

strangling all the possibilities for advancement in

at a hotel and cleaned houses on the side. I

my life, because I was burying myself in debt. In

also decided to file for bankruptcy, because I

my mid-twenties, I was overweight, in a miserable

could no longer afford to pay all the bills I had

relationship, overwhelmed with debt and had no college education.

Around my 26th birthday, I had a dream. I tell this story in my book: “I was driving across the Bay Bridge (a bridge that connects Oakland and San Francisco) and the road had huge holes in it. I stopped the car, because I feared for my life. When I got out of the car, I dropped to my knees. I was crying and praying. God

I made a promise to myself that I would never be bound by money again. LIVING

| 33


WOMEN EMPOWERMENT

amassed. It was a dumb decision and haunted

future, and I encourage others to do the same

me for 10 years. The better thing to do was

thing. I realized that when you give away your

to pay off the bills slowly over time with the

time to unworthy things and people, you don’t

help of a debt consolidation company. It was a

have the time and energy to write a book, build

painful lesson and one I will never forget.

a business, find the right loving significant other or take good care of yourself and your

During my speaking engagements, I’m often

children. TIME is the tool in my toolbox that

asked by attendees how I get everything done,

was the catalyst for all the great things that

especially being a wife and mother. And I ask

I’ve achieved.

them, “How can I afford not to get everything done?” My sacrifice will benefit my family

My family had to buy in to the time I needed

and community. I graduated from college in

to write my book and all my responsibilities as

my early 30’s. Right after graduation my dad

an executive. We had a family meeting where

passed away from cancer. I made a promise

I explained the sacrifice we all had to make if I

to my dad on his deathbed that I would make

was going to be successful at both. We all had

him proud. Yes, Walt Thornton would be proud

to make compromises. I understood that they

of my success as an author of two books and

expected me to be fully present when I was

becoming a BET media executive, but his real

at home, and attend specific events at school

pride would come from the fact that I have an

and outside sporting activities.

amazing family. I’m in constant communication with the school Can women have it all? Yes! Just not ALL at

and coaches to ensure that I have my calendar

the same time. Women are born nurturers. We

up to date with all major events. When you set

instinctively take care of others’ needs whether

expectations, and deliver on the agreed upon

it’s at work, home or in the community. It’s

plan, all are happy.

one of our best characteristics and one of the characteristics, if not managed, can be the

What and who will you give up today to take

reason we never reach our true assignment in

some time back to plan for a better future? To

life. We cannot afford to give away our time

build your plan and become Stratechic?

and money to people who have not earned it. I literally created an elimination list of people

After you get some time back and build a plan,

who were taking up valuable space in my

you must get your money right. I made stupid

34 | LIVING


decisions and wasted so many years because

your area who may help you find your way to

I made bad money decisions. Dr. Soaries says

financial wellness.

it best: “No debt, deficits and delinquencies.” I made a promise to myself that I would never be

Success is intentional. Success takes sacrifice.

bound by money again. That’s easier said than

Success takes resources. If I can build a plan

done. Having a family is expensive. Taking care

for success, I’m positive you can too! If you are

of a parent is expensive. Money just seems to

serious about the next phase of your life and

fly out the door. We made some good financial

want a strategy session, send me a note on

decisions as a family, and we weren’t afraid

LinkedIn! Let’s Go!

or embarrassed to find a financial planner. The biggest decision we made was to buy a house we could afford on one salary. We also have enough life insurance so that if anything happens to my husband or me, our family is protected. I also save a portion of every check I receive. I would have never been able to write and self-publish my book if I didn’t start a Stratechic savings account. It takes time and money to make money.

Now it’s your time! You have to decide you want to live a better life. You have to stop doing the same things and expecting a different outcome. You have to decide to be healthy, write that book, get promoted, find a husband, start your own business or visit http://www. changingourstory.splashthat.com to request to speak with a Prudential financial advisor in dfree®, a trademark of Corporate Community Connections, Inc. and Influencer Michele Thornton, are not affiliated with The Prudential Insurance Company of America or its affiliates. Each company is solely responsible for its own financial conditions, content, liabilities and contractual obligations. 0312791-00001-00

©2017 Prudential Financial, Inc. and its related entities. Prudential, the Prudential logo, the Rock symbol, and Bring Your Challenges are service marks of Prudential Financial, Inc. and its related entities, registered in many jurisdictions worldwide. LIVING

| 35


WOMEN EMPOWERMENT

GET CONTROL: LESSONS FROM OUR GRANDPARENTS by DeForest B. Soaries, Jr. When we can prove that we are capable of

My paternal grandmother was a sixth-grade

taking control of our finances, because we’ve

graduate and a self-made woman. Her skill

taken control of our lives, not only can we live

was sewing and so she became a seamstress.

a more care-free and less stressful life but we

She raised six children and after she had her

also can be in a position to really be a blessing

sixth child her husband had a stroke. As a

to our families and future generations.

black woman growing up in New York in the 1900s, my grandmother had tremendous

To get my mind in the right place and get control

responsibilities.

of my finances, I looked to my grandmothers as inspiration. My maternal grandmother was a

What’s interesting is both my grandmothers

domestic worker. She worked for rich people.

owned their own houses, which they passed

She cooked their food, cleaned their houses,

on to family, and always had money. If you

ironed their clothes and helped raise their

wanted a little money from Grandma Pinkard,

children – all while raising eight children and

she would turn around, pull a handkerchief out

two grandchildren of her own with a husband

of her bosom and give you a couple of dollars.

whose disability stopped him from working.

If you wanted big money, $10 or $15, she would roll up her skirt, reach in the top of her

36 | LIVING


stocking and pull out big cash. The bosom was

Yet whenever I asked dad for a loan until

the credit union; the bank was the stocking.

payday, he would say, “Son, you work every single day. Why is it that every other month

I decided that if my black grandmother – with

you need to borrow money?” And I’d say,

no education, no civil rights, in the 1900s, with

“Dad, I don’t know where my money goes.” My

no husband to support her – could die and

dad would look at me and say, “It doesn’t leave

leave me my first house, then shame on me –

home while you’re sleeping. The money goes

with my civil rights and all of my activism and

where you take it.”

all of my education – if all I have to leave when I die is credit card bills. I decided to take control.

You have to look at every single penny you spend as you spend it. Track it. Write it down

My grandmothers taught me three things

or put it in the notes on your phone. Make sure

about finances: 1) set short-term financial

you are spending on needs, not wants.

goals; 2) identify spending leaks; and, 3) list all income and expenses to give shape, form and

When we get to the budget, budget is not a

life to what we call a spending plan, commonly

nasty word and it’s not a restrictive word. A

known as a budget.

budget simply says that I have this much income and I have that many needs flowing an

from my expenses and I have to make sure I

opportunity to celebrate victories along the

have a balanced budget. I want my expenses

way and gives you something achievable on

to be not only no higher than my income, I

your way to your big dreams. It’s important

want my expenses to be lower than my income

to write down these goals. Once I was serious

because I need a cash-flow strategy.

Setting

short-term

goals

gives

you

about taking control, the first thing I did was sell my luxury car that was taking too much of

Is it easy? Of course not. Yet, you get control

my income every month. I paid cash for a used

by laying a firm foundation for your new life

car – with no air conditioning, two doors and

of freedom. Fundamentally, any plan that is

a stick shift.

going to work in advancing your freedom must be fueled by the power of your motivation.

Spending leaks are just that – you don’t know

Attitude and action go hand in hand. If my

the money is gone until it is gone. Now, my

grandmothers could do it, if I could do it, you

father was very supportive of his eldest son.

can do it. Get free. Get control.

LIVING

| 37


#BALANCEFORBETTER FOR INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY

The gender gap is widening, with it now predicted to take 217 years to achieve gender parity instead of the previously estimated 170 years, according to the World Economic Forum. Yet with efforts like #METOO, #TIMESUP and dfree® Women’s

Empowerment, there’s no better time to #BalanceForBetter, as the 2019 theme of International Women’s Day, March 8. The focus on women continued throughout March, for Women’s History Month.

What can you do to take a stand and join efforts without breaking the bank? Here are some ideas:

38 | LIVING


some videos (http://bit.ly/2m3Iux1) such as the UN’s Leave No One Behind (http://bit.ly/2GFlywf) or movies like Hidden Figures and discuss.

>

COMMIT

TO

ly/2DUmdvz), like

AN

ACTION

nominating

(https://bit. women

for

opportunities and questioning assumptions about women.

> IF YOU’RE A WOMAN, take care of yourself

> CONNECT TO WOMEN by becoming an

by meditating, starting a new exercise routine

active mentor/mentee.

or reading a woman-authored classic like Zora

> COMMEMORATE WOMEN

who make a

difference by doing so yourself. Decide how often you can volunteer, pick an organization, join and contribute regularly.

Neale Hurston’s Their Eyes Were Watching God. If you’re a man, take care of a woman you love by pampering her with foot and shoulder

WOMEN EMPOWERMENT

> HOST A POT-LUCK VIEWING PARTY, pick

massages, home-cooked meals, etc. > INTERVIEW THE MATRIARCHS of your

> PLAN A WEEKLY ACTIVITY this month where you and your family can learn more about women’s history, such as visiting museums or

community, either on video or paper, and organize your results for the local historical society or library.

art galleries. > HOST A TRIVIA GAME NIGHT that focuses > INVOLVE OTHERS by planning social media

on

posts that celebrate women and educate about

celebration of the women in your community.

gender parity.

> IF YOU’RE A WOMAN, ask for a raise or

women

or

organize

a

neighborhood

review the salaries of the women who report to you. If you’re a man who supervises women, do the same. > GIVE YOURSELF A RAISE by focusing on your talents and what you do that you can turn into a business. > DETERMINE if you can double your savings goals for the next 30 days. LIVING

| 39


INSPIRATION

CLOSE-KNIT GOD’S GURLS TALK MUSIC, MINISTRY AND MONEY Many people are shocked, then excited

God’s Gurls wants your commitment.

when they witness Trunae Green and her

“Music puts people in a different place.

sister Trulyse Lands show up at a gig with

You can be in the most horrible mood

their guitars.

and if you listen to the right music it can change your whole perspective,” said

“They are petite women and people think

Trunae, who serves as music director, lead

they’re little girls, yet they are gifted and

guitar, background singer and writer. “As

talented women,” said their aunt, Pastor

it relates to music and ministry, we desire

Shon Brooks-Kidd, another member of

for our music to be life changing, to bring

God’s Gurls, also known as GG. “The looks

inspiration to people, to bring them to

on people’s faces -- when they plug up

know God.”

their instruments and start playing -- it’s always the best response!”

MUSIC IN THEIR VEINS

Born in the Atlanta-based Family Life And once they’ve gotten your attention, 40 | LIVING

Missionary Baptist Church 10 years ago,


and listen to blues, you can become even

Christian gospel, traditional gospel, jazz,

sadder. If you’re angry and listen to heavy

R&B, and rap. Currently, the five-members

metal, you can become angrier. It’s why

are rounded out by Shakiera Brooks and

we sing gospel. It’s our prayer that when

Consuelo “Connie” Brown, prime lead

people hear our music and our lyrics they’ll

singer.

themselves:

be led to Christ. They’ll say, ‘I want to know

“God’s Gurls is a group of beautiful, saved,

that God; I can have a relationship with that

educated women who play and sing music

kind of Jesus.’”

As

they

describe

INSPIRATION

God’s Gurls presents a mix of contemporary

as a band to glorify God.” They also run their own label, TruFaith Music LLC, and are

God’s Gurls first album, released in 2012, was

managed by the sisters’ parents, Bishop

updated and re-released early in 2018. The

Alfred T. Lands and Assistant Pastor

music is available on Amazon, (https://www.

Rosemary Lands.

amazon.com/gp/product/B009NYUI24/ ref=dm_ws_sp_ps_dp),

iTunes

(https://

Their story is a family story of generations

itunes.apple.com/us/album/gods-gurls/

of pastors and singers, so several of God’s

id567901230), and their website (https://

Gurls grew up singing, dancing, playing

www.onemilliongodsgurls.net/).

instruments

and

otherwise

expressing

themselves through praise music. Shakiera,

Trunae’s favorite song from the album

who is from New Jersey but joined the

is one she wrote, Psalm 40, just after her

group after moving to Georgia to attend

grandfather’s passing. It’s about turning to

Spelman College, is now married to Rev.

God, trusting his plan and having patience.

Darien Brooks, a vocalist, who is cousin

“God spoke to me and told me to turn to

to Trunae and Trulyse and Shon’s nephew.

Psalm 40 and the melody and everything

The family affair keeps the women laughing

just came,” she said.

and humble. For Trulyse, who sings lead and background “Music can be life changing. That’s why

vocals and plays bass guitar and drums,

there are so many different genres of

picking one favorite song is next to impossible.

music,” said Pastor Shon, who sings lead and

background

vocals.

“Depending

“All of them are favorites, each for a different

on what mood you’re in, you have to be

reason,” Trulyse said. “I guess I relate best to

careful to what you listen to. If you’re blue

the song entitled Sunday that encourages LIVING

| 41


friends to get to know Jesus for real and stop

MUSIC AND MONEY

playing! To see what He’s all about. The ones

Aside from growing their ministry, God’s Gurls

that encourage people to come to church and

said they want to learn as much about the

be a warrior. You may not understand yet but if

business side of the music industry as possible

you start speaking to Christ, you will.”

– especially since they occupy a space where those who request the group can’t always

MUSIC IN THEIR SOULS

meet their financial obligations.

God’s Gurls has given themselves a challenge to use their ministry to recruit one million women

“If your heart is right, we don’t mind being

to also become God’s Gurls. They want women

a blessing even if you can’t fully meet the

to become active in their spirits so they can

financial obligations,” Trunae said, noting

live happier lives and do more for themselves,

that there is a practical need to understand

their families and their communities.

money and compensation. “We want to put out our very best. We want to have the best

“We have a phenomenal campaign as part of

production and best tour. We want our stuff

our ministry. We talk to women about living a

to be 5-star and that just can’t happen without

lifestyle to glorify God,” Shakiera said. “We want

money. Money is really a tool to further your

one million girls and women to join with us and

goals. You also need resources to put work

take a stand in being women of God. Often

back into the community and to be helpful to

times, we have people who say they are Christian

the community.”

but are not committed to the lifestyle. We are encouraging women and helping them know

Trunae said that her mother often talks about

you really can live a life committed to God.”

being “free” in her ministry and that the concepts found in the dfree® Financial Freedom

Shakiera added that too often women tear

Movement align well with the goals of God’s

each other down while God’s Gurls wants

Gurls. It’s helping them get a better handle on

them to build each other up. The commitment

the music industry and their personal finances.

includes a few serious yet achievable promises

Shakiera noted that even though moving to

to: have a relationship with Christ; maintain

Atlanta for college was a positive experience,

abstinence until marriage; be a true friend;

the student loan debt that she now has is not.

value education; share success, and respect

She said that, had she been introduced to

one’s self and others.

dfree® earlier, she would have made different decisions about college. But, now that she

42 | LIVING


and her husband are planning for their

and rapper Brandon “B-Lat” Latimore,

children’s futures, they’re using dfree® as a

God’s Gurls sees great expansion over the

guide to become more successful.

next 10 years.

Pastor Shon said she’s also brought the

“God has given us this gift to go out and

dfree®

bring to others,” Trulyse said. “We’re blessed

concepts

back

to

Milwaulkee,

Wisconsin where she lives.

and we want to be a blessing to others.”

“Often African Americans don’t like to

To become one of the million God’s Gurls,

discuss money because they don’t feel they

fill out the form on the GG website (https://

have any. They don’t feel they are wealthy,

www.onemilliongodsgurls.net/become-

so it’s not worth discussing,” Pastor Shon

a-gg). Follow God’s Gurls on Facebook,

said. “If we’re only living check to check

Twitter and Instagram @GodsGurls.

or robbing Peter to pay Paul, there’s not a lot of room for discussion because they are barely making it. We convince people there is a way. We use our music as a tool to minister and to get people to open up. Many people are afraid. They’ve been hurt and taken advantage of, so they need to know there is safety in Jesus.”

One of the top needs in her community, for instance, is for black families to buy life insurance.

“People are afraid to talk about life insurance because they are afraid to die,” Pastor Shon said. “We make them feel comfortable and that they are loved, and with God and family there is always a way to make it work.” With their own work and that of their other signed artists, including Rev. Darien Brooks LIVING

| 43


the

PULSE of MENTAL, SPIRITUAL and FINANCIAL HEALTH.

ALL NEW EPISODES

BE AN ACTIVE MEMBER OF dfree® LISTEN, DOWNLOAD AND SUBSCRIBE

44 | LIVING

#DFREEINTHEBLACK MYDFREE.ORG


NEST EGG

LIVE A RICHER LIFE BY PLANNING FOR DEATH by DeForest B. Soaries, Jr. Have you ever considered where you want to

Financial wellness is a term that is often

retire? Can your mind conjure up a specific

used, but not always understood. “It is more

place where your favorite things surround

than finances. It’s how you feel about your

you, and you’re living your best life? Salene

finances,” said Gear. In a 2016 Prudential

Hitchcock-Gear, President, Individual Life

survey, they discovered that 78% of people

Insurance for Prudential, shared her vision

didn’t feel financially secure. That affects

for retirement with the attendees of the

your health as well as your professional

dfree® Homecoming Conference. Gear’s

performance. The question becomes how

plan is to retire somewhere on a beach near

to do something about it.

a coffee shop and a bookstore. If she finds the ultimate beach without access to a

The irony regarding our worry around

coffee shop or bookstore than she plans to

money is that while our fear may throw

open them herself. Meaning her retirement

us off base, we continue to be optimistic

must be well funded.

that everything will work out, even with no plan. The problem is that “We don’t put action and motion into place to take care

LIVING

| 45


of things. Buying a lottery ticket is not a

long-term, markets are long-term,” said

financial plan,” said Gear.

Gear. Your professional will educate you regarding changing markets and help you

Some people are great at stretching money

address the anxiety that can result in a fear

to the point of making a dollar scream

mindset.

because it has been taken further than initially thought possible. Unfortunately, it

Financial professionals help you develop

doesn’t earn anything for you. “We need

your plan, outline your goals and reach them.

to get our mind around what is going to

They are beside you every step of the way.

matter. Don’t pay interest, earn interest.

Gear said, “Set up your plan, stick with your

You don’t have to have a lot of money to

plan and realize your goals with Prudential.”

live well,” said Gear. Go back to your dream of retirement. Are Start by planning for simple things that

you ready to move it from the dream to

make a difference. “Take care of what you

reality category?

have, plan for your future and educate yourself as much as you can about how to maximize what you have,” said Gear. Consider putting your money into three buckets, “One, for now, one for later and one for much, much later,” explained Gear. Also, get help from a partner that can turn your daydreams into reality. The single biggest difference between people who have more money saved and those who don’t is a financial advisor. “Research shows a 40% differential,” said Gear.

Without a financial advisor when the market is hot, most people buy. Conversely, when the market is soft, people sell. “Financial professionals remind you that goals are

46 | LIVING

Set up your plan, stick with your plan and realize your goals with Prudential.


NEST EGG

7 HABITS OF FINANCIALLY FREE PEOPLE by Maddie Brooks Do you want to be financially successful? Yes?

of what needs your immediate attention so you can

Then you may be wondering, what do financially

approach your finances with eyes wide open.

free people do differently? Here’s the short answer: they’ve adopted the right mindset toward money,

2. Automate your savings. Set a savings and

and they have consistently practiced healthy

investment amount for each of your financial

money habits.

goals or responsibilities (i.e. college funding, home ownership, insurance) and have it automatically

It takes self-awareness, knowledge and dedication

deducted from your paycheck. Keep the funds

to begin managing your money in a way that leads

separate from your checking account. You will

to financial security and independence. But the

likely be less tempted to spend what you don’t see.

good news is you can do it! And Prudential is here to

Like they say, out of sight, out of mind.

help. Consider how you can develop the following seven habits of the financially free.

3. Do more than just “think” about planning for retirement. Contribute to your 401(k) or IRA today.

1. Organize all your financial paperwork. That pile

Not next week. Not when you get a raise. Not at

of mail on your kitchen counter and those stacks

some other convenient time. TODAY! Because the

of paperwork on your desk are costing you. Once

money you put in your retirement fund now will

you have everything in front of you, make three

have more time to grow. After all, people are living

piles, “pay, file and shred,” and then, do just that.

long after they retire, and you want to enjoy that

No matter how you go about it, you must open

phase of your life. You earned it!

your mail and organize your paperwork. Be aware

LIVING

| 47


NEST EGG

4. Take control of your spending – with a budget.

com to set up a complimentary consultation where

Being intentional with how you spend your time

we can discuss your needs, or visit http://www.

and money can give you control of your finances

changingourstory.splashthat.com to request to

— and your financial future. You gain control when

speak with a Prudential Financial Professional in

you create a budget plan. Allot a set amount or

your area.

percentage for each of your expenses (i.e. rent, groceries, savings). Then track your progress – you can even use an app like Mint. But, however you’ve designated your goals, commit to staying on track.

5. Start paying off small debts. If you have a large amount of debt, paying off debts with lower balances can give you the confidence to tackle the larger ones. In addition, consider chipping away at the credit cards with the highest interest rates.

6. Create an emergency fund. Let’s face it, the unexpected is inevitable. Nearly half of Americans can’t deal with a basic financial emergency. I would recommend saving at least six months of basic living expenses to be prepared.

7. Consult a professional who can help you set and achieve goals. In the end, why try to figure it all out on your own? A financial professional can help you create a budget, set an action plan to pay down debt, or educate you on ways you can prepare for the future. Don’t be afraid to seek help. After all, that’s the mindset of the financially free.

We can plan for your financial freedom together. Feel free to contact me at maddie.brooks@prudential.

48 | LIVING

dfree®, a trademark of Corporate Community Connections, Inc. and Influencer Michele Thornton, are not affiliated with The Prudential Insurance Company of America or its affiliates. Each company is solely responsible for its own financial conditions, content, liabilities and contractual obligations. ©2017 Prudential Financial, Inc. and its related entities. Prudential, the Prudential logo, the Rock symbol, and Bring Your Challenges are service marks of Prudential Financial, Inc. and its related entities, registered in many jurisdictions worldwide.


The Billion Dollar Challenge was created to help tackle debt and savings with our online tracking tool. It’s fun and easy. You can do it with a group too!

HOW TO GET STARTED

1 2 3

SIGN UP

On billiondollarpaydown.com by clicking the ‘JOIN NOW’ button

FOLLOW

Prompts on the screen to personalize your dashboard and plan (also available under the tutorial tab in the menu)

JOIN

A group by searching for a group under the group tab in the menu

LIVING

To learn more, visit billiondollarpaydown.com

| 49


OUR PEOPLE

FINANCIAL DIS-EASE: DON’T FEEL BAD UNLESS YOU DON’T CHANGE YOUR SITUATION by DeForest B. Soaries, Jr. Financial indebtedness is a new form of slavery.

own personal financial responsibilities. I had

There’s no doubt; the financial system is

proposed solutions for solving huge social

stacked against African Americans. According

problems but had never balanced my own

to one recent study, The Ever-Growing Gap,

checkbook. I had fought for justice and equality

the wealth gap between black and white

but could not afford to make a donation to a

Americans is so extreme that it would take 228

black college, the NAACP or any other cause

years for black people to obtain on average

I supported. Fortunately, my shame and

what white families have today.

humiliation motivated me to take actions that changed my life.

As bad as the situation may be, it will only get worse unless you act now to gain control over

You have to find your motivation. Think deeply

your finances. I know just how debilitating

about the reasons you spend money you don’t

being broke can be. While my parents taught

have, or why you don’t budget and why you

me by example to be frugal, once I left their

don’t worry about paying bills on time. Maybe

household I found myself far from following

you never had any luxury you wanted as a child

their lead. I had never felt so unaccomplished

so you’re determined not to deprive yourself

and

about

as an adult. Maybe your parents sacrificed so

social change, I had done nothing about my

you could have everything you wanted but

50 | LIVING

incomplete.

While

passionate


As a pastor, I turn to God when I need help

it just makes you feel good to have new stuff.

with difficult situations. One powerful biblical

And who doesn’t want to feel good?

example of someone who knew how to take on new tasks and succeed is Joshua. Joshua,

While immediate gratification has become

the great conqueror who led the Israelites

almost synonymous with being an American,

after Moses, knew that success required the

the consequences of indulging this behavior

right attitude. Anything worth doing is worth

are long-term and severe. The deeper in debt

attempting to do very well. Great ideas do not

you get the faster your debt accumulates,

guarantee success. Rather, it is great execution

thanks to things such as interest rates, late

of

fees and poor decision-making. If you’re in

outcomes. Great execution is execution that is

this situation, you’re not alone. According

saturated with integrity – doing what is right

to a Prudential study, a majority of black

versus doing what is expedient. There are no

Americans reported having debt, particularly

shortcuts to success. Someone is always going

credit card debt, while at least half reported

to accomplish great things in order to get

that reducing debt is a top priority.

great results. Furthermore, achievement does

great

ideas

that

produces

OUR PEOPLE

never showed you the price they paid. Maybe

successful

not happen by accident; it happens for those The gap we need to focus on is the gap

who aim high, remain focused and, I believe,

between wanting to eliminate debt and

follow God’s instruction.

actually eliminating debt. It takes discipline and determination. It won’t happen overnight.

The most important step to annihilating

Yet, one of the most important things you can

financial dis-ease is setting your mind right.

do is make up your mind now to live debt-free.

You must want to break the chains and end

Decide today that you are going to change

financial slavery. With a clear and determined

your situation. If blood were streaming from

mind, you can properly assess your finances,

your arm, you wouldn’t bandage it and think

or address the mess, and be on your way to

about it later. You would seek immediate

gaining control of the situation.

medical help. Yet you’re allowing your finances to bleed you dry at a time when there’s plenty of help available.

LIVING

| 51


FINAL WORD WITH PASTOR TREVOR HYDE, JR.

dfree® Loyalty Leader Church Ambassador Pastor Trevor Hyde, Jr., from BEREAN BAPTIST CHURCH OF BROOKLYN, NEW YORK, has said, “Money goes where you tell you it. Money does what you make it do. If you want it to grow, you put it where it can grow. If you want it to disappear, you spend it on things that will not return any sense of value to your life.”

52 | LIVING


PRUDENTIAL IS THE PROUD TITLE SPONSOR OF THE DFREE® FINANCIAL FREEDOM MOVEMENT

Prudential is here to help you make the decisions that will have a lasting impact on your financial wellness. For more information, please visit us at www.prudential.com #PruEmpowers

dfree™ and Financial Freedom Movement™ are trademarks of the Corporate Community Connections, Inc., which is not affiliated with The Prudential Insurance Company of America or its affiliates, Newark, NJ. Each company is solely responsible for its own financial condition, content, liabilities and contractual obligations. 0317582-00001-00

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| 53


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