ple can't even begin to imagine the "tragedy" that is divorce. A failed marriage isn't a "tragedy," it's just life. Things happen and people change. No one controls the twisted ways of fate. What
I find interesting is that there are so many who believe divorce is an "all bad" thing. Nothing good can come of a divorce, correct? I don't believe so. My parents have been divorced since I was two or so. I can't recall any times of when I had one "normal" family, but I can imagine there wouldn't be a lot of happy memories. Knowing my parents for 16 years, I can understand why they divorced. Their stubborn personalities are so similar that you would have to wonder how in the world did they last ten years without killing each other. But I believe that is the only reason I do not resent their choice. I would not want to grow up in a house filled with tension and anger and I'm glad they made their decision before I could remember any of it. Another
benefit that comes with being the child of two sets of parents is that I am able to develop a sense of different personality types. All four of my parents are almost completely different from one another. All of them are strict (of course) but some are sweet and generous and some are witty and others are condescending and hurtful at times. Over the past however many years I've gained insight into how to handle being around many different personalities just by living with them all. I have learned how to make a good first impression as well as how to stand up for myself (even if it's against an authority figure). This family setup provided me with a sense of the di-
versity of persons in this world and how each is approached differently. Now
there are some unfortunate issues to being a child of divorced parents. It's hard to hear friends talk about happy family events or memories. It's hard to listen and not envy the solidity that comes with the word "family" from the mouth of a child who cannot possibly imagine the heartache you've experienced. It's difficult to explain the pain of knowing you come from a broken home and quite possibly will never know what it feels like to belong to a family 100% instead of 50% of two different families. To feel like a stranger in your own home for 10 years or to not be included in "family" trips you only hear about a week after they are back… it hurts. But you keep on moving and breathing because life never stops. You learn early on to just accept things as they are because they will never change no matter how long you dwell on them. The
one thing to remember is that they are still your family. They are there for you when you need them to be. If you can't talk to one of your parents, you now have a couple others to choose from. It's important to keep a good perspective on your situation if you are one of these children. They will always love you even if they don't love each other anymore. "Divorce is the psychological equivalent of a triple coronary bypass. After such a monumental assault on the heart, it takes years to amend all of the habits and attitudes that led up to it." ~Mary Kay Blakely
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