Eight steps to being you!

Are you continually rushing, slappingtogether school lunches, checking emailsthrough the spam, undouble-booking yourcalendar, telling your husband where hisstray sock is, problem-solving for a friendand wondering when you’ll find time forthe first hit of caffeine?

Where are you in all this? Mum, wife, mumpreneur, friend or rattled, time-poor woman? You’re everything, but mostly you. Lose yourself in life’s stuff and you risk, health, wellbeing, mental state and your business.

Saying, “I love myself.” No, it’s not vain, conceited or narcissistic (unless of course, you do more selfies than Cristiano Ronaldo)

— it’s essential to surviving. Loving yourself is not only satisfying our inner needs, helping our self-esteem, and keeping us healthy, it also reflects on people we come in contact with. We cannot effectively treat people with patience, love and kindness. So what are the steps?

Yep, that’s snorting giggle, crazy fashion, opinionated and down-right you — you. Be who you are not what everyone expects you to be. If you want to dance in the rain and you’re told you’ll catch a cold, what do you say? “At least I’ll have danced.”

Each person is imperfect. We all make mistakes — lessons to help you. By forgiving ourselves when we falter, we are giving ourself love.

Yes, you’ll hear self-doubt, ‘I’m not smart enough’, ‘I feel shy’, ‘I’m incapable’. Switch thoughts to positive ones like, ‘I’ll learn more to be smarter’, ‘I’m not shy, I just don’t want to talk unless I have something to say’, ‘I’m capable of doing —. Be your own best friend. Give yourself an inner pep talk and be positive.

Put time aside (could be less or more) to nurture yourself. It can be going for a walk in the bush, meditating, sweating it out at a gym or pouring a petal-filled bath, with incense burning, door locked to your family so you can enjoy a book.

Seek your own approval. Closely aligned with being unapologetically you, don’t dwell on what others think. When fear sets in it can be debilitating. Do you think Ita Buttrose worried about her lisp?

Letting go of fear also means saying ‘no’ more often. Don’t allow others to manipulate you into doing something you should say no to for fear of what they will think of you.

It’s not only new age gurus who suggestmeditation and yoga as a way toalleviate stress. Psychologists saytapping into your inner being maystrengthen your faith in yourself,give a sense of spirituality, reducemental stress and help with wellbeing.

You don’t have to be Marie Kondo to getrid of mess. Reorganising your life willunclutter your mind. Sort the folders onyour computer, tidy your underweardraw, whateverit may be, once you’re more organised,you won’t waste time and you’ll sufferless stress.

If you’re treating your body like adumpster instead of a temple you’re notlooking after your best friend. Bemindful of what you eat, how youexercise and everything you do toyour body. Let if flourish, and don’tforget your mind is part of your bodytoo. Self-care and being you is theactive intention of restoring health,improving energy and easing stress.Be kind to yourself —There’s only one YOU!

Tammie Pike xo