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Caring for caregivers Caregivers don’t always think of themselves as such. They are simply the husbands, wives and children of loved ones who are ill and need help. But the truth is that caregivers often need help themselves. Support groups, respite care and good friends are all ways our community can support caregivers during trying times. coveR design Susan McBride
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Bullying needs to stop I felt compelled to write a letter to the editor after reading about the horrible incident at Candler Elementary School. A 9-year-old boy, who loves My Little Pony, brought a backpack to school that had a character on [it]. His classmates called him vicious names and teased and tormented him. I won’t get into all the humiliation that this little guy suffered. It got to where he told his mom he was afraid to go to school. His mom contacted the princiapl to address the matter. However, instead of dealing with the little brats who had tormented and bullied this child, [they told] the boy ... to not bring his backpack to school any more because it could “trigger bullying.” It ALREADY had triggered bullying! Instead of handling it correctly, the idiots in charge of the administration there (and I blame the principal and the Buncombe County superintendent of schools because they are ultimately responsible) punished the victim of this conduct — basically telling the little thugs that if you torment someone here, the administration will take your side and you win. This is unacceptable. Both the superintendent and the principal ... should be fired (not given the option of resigning) at the next school board meeting — oh, and no golden parachutes like was given to the last superintendent of Buncombe County schools, for whatever reason. The purpose of rules, school administration and teachers is
to provide a learning environment for children, not to protect the backside of incompetent adults. ... This is not the only incident of this type to have happened here. A little kindergartner in Black Mountain was physically bullied a while back. [School Board member] Lisa Baldwin brought that to the school board’s attention and of course nothing was done. The traditional North Carolina political way of “cover your ass” needs to end, and the people responsible need to be held accountable — and not by having the school board or whatever hid behind personnel records or any other nonsense when what they are really doing is covering up. — by Daniel Breen Asheville Editor’s note: After Breen submitted this letter, Buncombe County Schools released a statement that Grayson Bruce would be allowed to bring his My Little Pony backpack to school and that they will take measures to insure his safety and prevent bullying.
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N E W S
Trailblazer of chemistry, both began working on their doctorates at a challenging point in their lives. “We were running out of money, everything — we were as poor then as we have ever been,” she remembers. “Just when I thought we couldn’t hold on, we got this phone call that invited us to interview for two positions up here. That had to be God, as far as I was concerned.” They started teaching at UNCA in August 1987, but the pace didn’t slow. “I was 5 1/2 months pregnant with my second child,” James reports. “In August, I did not know I was pregnant; I did not know until I got the results of my comps. It was hard, because we were very poor. We were not like the other professors here.” Frequent separations from her husband, who often had to travel to Columbia, S.C., to complete his dissertation, made the shift even harder. “The first summer, he got an assistantship and got an apartment there. He came every other weekend. So I was pregnant, with a 4-year-old, and I was still under contract, because I was supposed to be working that summer,” she recalls. “We were very nervous about how that was going to work. Lynette was born a week before she was due, and there were days when I was crying. I spent days crying.”
UNC Asheville professor Dee James still leads the way
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When deborah “dee” james walked tentatively onto the UNC Asheville campus in 1969, it was as one of the first African-Americans to integrate the women’s dormitories. Nowadays, however, she downplays that pioneer status. “It was the times; it was happenstance. If it wasn’t me, then it would have been somebody. Also, because I was 17, I didn’t know that it was going to be such a big deal,” she points out. “Saying that I’m a trailblazer is just not quite accurate, because everybody was doing it: Everybody was blazing a trail somewhere. My little piece here was so small.” But colleague dolly jenkinsmullen, an associate professor of political science, says James doesn’t realize how her presence at UNCA impacted diversity. “She’s always stayed in the loop. She is the loop; she’s never broken with that.” Jenkins-Mullen says she met James in the early 1980s, when the state forced the school to hire more African-American faculty; their relationship started off strong and has only gotten stronger over the years. “We met because we were hired within a year or so of each other,” she explains. “We call ourselves sisters because we are: We take care of each other and of each other’s families. We’ve had family troubles, and she has stood there. She stood there.” Growing up in a time of weighty racial tensions, notes James, fueled her passion for diversity work. “I’ve always been one of the racial minorities,” the Charlotte native observes. “I came of age in the late ’60s; it was imprinted on me that we had some work to do. Part of our work was we were always representing the
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institutionaL memoRy: UNCA Professor Dee James first came to campus in 1969. Colleagues say she’s blazed a trail in many ways over the years. Photo by Alicia Funderburk
race. Whatever you were doing, you were representing the race. So you have a responsibility to do that as well as you can.” But representing an entire race also involved cultivating one’s own talents. “From the time that I was growing up, I was made to understand that you could go as far as you could possibly go with whatever talent you had. That was not about race — that was about being a human being,” she recalls. “If you’ve got a talent, then it was your job to make the most of that talent. To whom much is given, much is expected.”
HaRd times James, now in her 40th year of teaching freshman composition, says she wouldn’t want any other job. “If I had been able to design a dream job — if I had known how to do that — this is pretty close to it,” she reveals. “It makes me sound weird in some ways, because we still struggle with diversity, but I just really love teaching. I love having the opportunity to work with students individually.” James and her husband, charles, an associate professor
stRategy foR success James, meanwhile, hadn’t completed her own dissertation, but a push from her supervisor forced her to get to work. “My boss, who was jeff Rackham, took me out and said, ‘I want you to understand one thing: I don’t care how much we love you; I don’t care how good you are in the classroom. If you don’t finish that Ph.D., you are out of here,’” she recalls. James realized she needed a strategy. “I had sense enough to understand the only way I could make this work was to embed the research in my teaching. So it became a project about how you teach writing, which is something I really needed and wanted to know more about,” she explains. “I did an ethnographic
study, which meant that I could do interviews, follow people around. It took me a year to gather all that data, another year to analyze data.” But when it came time to sit down and actually start writing, she couldn’t find a suitable workspace. And with her husband wrapping up his dissertation, James grew worried. “When Charles told me in March that he was going to defend in April, that really scared me, because I thought, ‘If all of them are home, I’ll have no place to concentrate.’ We had no place for me to go sit and work,” she said. “I needed a place that was not on campus, because coming to campus I ran into people, stuff from the campus got in my way.” Then help arrived. Colleague Ileana Grams, a walking buddy who was going on vacation for a couple of weeks, offered James her house. “I would get up at 6, have some breakfast, I would work — solidly, with laser focus — until about 12:30. I would take a half-hour for lunch, go back to work and work solidly,” she remembers. “Dot Sulock [now a lecturer in mathematics at the school] would come and walk with me for about an hour at 5. I would go back to Ileana’s, read and prepare for the next day’s work. By the end of those two weeks, I had finished my dissertation.” Nearly 30 years later, James is still amazed by her feat. “Even looking back at it, it doesn’t make sense to me. I don’t know how that worked, because I could have sworn to you that I had six months more of work to do on that dissertation,” she says. “But I was done with that manuscript, and I still think that it’s some of the best work that I’ve done.” Welcoming diversity James’ engagement with diversity didn’t stop there, however. “As long as I’ve been associated with UNCA, I’ve always been associated with efforts to increase diversity,” she notes, “to make this place feel welcoming and safe and better for underrepresented groups, particularly for African-Americans.” One long-running project was the African-American Colloquium, launched in 1991. “We did it for 13 years and focused it on the theme of a liberal arts education, and we always had them reading something of classic black literature,” political science professor Dwight Mullen recalls. “We added it onto our schedules.
Whatever schedule we were teaching, we added that class on top of it. So if you were scheduled for four classes, basically you were teaching five, which is killer. After 13 years, it just wore us out.” Reserved exclusively for AfricanAmerican students, the colloquium aimed to help them understand their heritage, says James. “Part of the thing we tried to address there was the notion of identity. How many ways can you be black?” she explains. “If you take yourself seriously as an intellectual, does that mean that you’re also not black? Does that mean that you’re somehow embracing whiteness? So we tried to dispel that notion.” After talking with James, Alan Hantz, a professor of mass communication, joined the colloquium, even though he’s white. “I’ve always been very close friends with the Jameses; our children went to the same day care,” he says. “We had ongoing conversations on how issues of media effects were relevant to issues of diversity. Eventually, we put that together and did a film class that was a lot of fun.” Jenkins-Mullen remembers times in the colloquium when James dropped her usually mild manner. “I have seen her get upset. I have seen her take some [students] to the side and tell them, ‘Look, you’re not acting right,’ because they weren’t getting it any other way,” says the Baltimore native. “We looked over there, we’re like, ‘Oh, y’all have really messed up,’ because there’s nothing you can say when Dr. James takes you in a corner. I remember just sniggling. Whatever it was did not need to be repeated, because she had made it clear.” Confronting racism From the beginning, says Mullen, he and James shared a vision of what it meant to be true colleagues. “Initially, when we didn’t know each other, we decided
that a problem at many universities is faculty not getting along with each other, within departments and between departments. And we said that was not going to happen,” he explains. “We never have issues; we’re on the same page. But we resolved a long time ago that the only way we want to be on this campus was in a mutually supportive relationship.” James also had a way of speaking to Mullen when he would get too passionate, his wife notes. “She’s stern, but she’s the one who would come and calm Dwight Mullen down: ‘Now, brother, we’re not going to hit anybody today. We need to address this,’” JenkinsMullen recalls. “Her deportment in many ways was very much needed, because her perspective was right on and she delivered it — and she delivers it still — in ways that were not so antagonistic.” Even as a child, says James, she loved to talk. “The nuns told my parents in first or second grade that I talked too much. They would stand me in the corner, but they were too afraid that I would talk to the bricks,” she recalls. “And as an adult, one of my priest friends told me, ‘I bet when you talk to God, you do all the talking.’ And I thought, ‘Oh, so I’m still talking, huh?’ So a challenge in my life has been to learn how to listen.” As a student at UNCA, says James, that included listening to racist remarks. “A white woman, a freshman colleague of mine from Texas, said to me, ‘I don’t have anyone else to ask, so can I ask you? My aunt told me that when I was coming up here to school that I needed to be careful about black men. Is it true that black men have prehensile tails, like monkeys?’” remembers James. “Do you know what you’re asking me? Are you asking me if we’re human? Are you asking me if we’re the same species? “It took me about 10 years to process the trauma of that question,” she continues. “I had known that white and black people had racial difficulties, but it had never occurred to me
“I’ve always been one of the racial minorities. I came of age in the late ’60s; it was imprinted on me that we had some work to do.” UNCA professor Dee James
that people could look at me and not see a human being.” Still a trailblazer James has also heard racially charged remarks from her students. “I was sitting in another class with freshmen, and we had read a story, and we got ready to talk about it. One of the young women said, ‘I just love this story: You people are just so good at singing and dancing.’ Several people who were sitting in the circle with me just went, ‘Oh, no, she didn’t.’ But you’re a teacher,” says James. “What she said was stupid and inappropriate. So I kept trying to say, ‘Let’s not talk about “you people.” Not all black people can sing and dance, if that’s what you meant. And I don’t think that’s what this story is about, anyway, so let’s talk about the story.’” Dealing with prejudiced remarks as a professor, she says, requires deft maneuvering and keeping a level head. “I’m often the only black person in the room, even now. There have been challenges, because I am the teacher in the room: I have a power; I give you grades. So you are naive, you may also be racist, and what you said was really offensive,” James explains. “I have to find a way to make you see that that’s really offensive and not to say that out loud in front of people. Sometimes that has been really problematic, and I still think about did I do enough or did I not do enough? But you do your best.” Despite those obstacles, however, James loves her work. “I love reading people’s papers and responding to them and watching people grow,” she says. “I was telling my freshmen — and I know that they think I was just blowing smoke — that I know that they can achieve things that they can’t dream of yet. And that’s really exciting, and I know that I can be a part of pushing them and helping them.” Still, there is one part of her career that James says remains unfinished: her efforts to increase overall diversity and particularly the AfricanAmerican presence at UNCA. “It feels like I haven’t done the work,” she says. “All that work, and we still don’t have that much to show for it? But it’s just the work that needs to be done. We have to keep on doing and doing. You have to pay attention to it, though, because it won’t take care of itself.” X
MARCH 26 - APRIL 2, 2014
by David Forbes and Jake Frankel
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The big drive After being off the radar for years, a renewed push to construct a section of Interstate 26 through Asheville is picking up speed. The drive is, in part, the result of a small group of influential local leaders who have met behind the scenes for more than a year to try to find ways of making the long-contentious idea a reality. An informal group of seven people — Asheville Vice Mayor marc Hunt, City Council member jan davis, Buncombe County Commissioners joe belcher, brownie newman and Holly jones, former Mayor Lou bissette (representing the Asheville Area Chamber of Commerce) and WNC Alliance Co-Director julie mayfield — have met regularly for about 18 months to work on pushing the I-26 connector forward. Advocates have argued for decades that such a road is needed to boost safety and commerce. Historically, the interstate debate has been marked by an inability of local governments to agree on a route, as well as concerns about the number of homes that communities would lose and the potential damage the project could do for years to come. But in the last couple of weeks, the seven leaders, who call themselves the “I-26 Working Group,” have used their sway to start getting results. Buncombe County Commissioners voted unanimously March 18 to approve a supportive resolution the the group drafted. As this story went to press, Asheville City Council was scheduled to consider the matter March 25. Meanwhile, opposition to the group’s effort has started to mount,
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Ad-hoc group pushes forward on local Interstate 26 connector the route. “It’s not like the direction is being decided today, but it gives us some guidance to go forward,” he said. The language of the county-approved resolution written by the working group states: “for the purpose of the upcoming scoring and ranking process, N.C. DOT use the estimated cost of $230 million associated with the preliminary 3C alignment alternative for the B section of the project.” Hit tHe bRakes
dRawing connections: This image shows two different possible routes for Interstate 26. The older plan, Alternative 3, pictured above the red line, calls for it to cross the French Broad River into Emma. The newest plan, Alternative 3C (pictured below the red line), which is being pushed by a group of leaders, routes it further south before crossing the river closer to Westgate Shopping Center. Image courtesy of the N.C. Department of Transportation
with critics raising concerns over perceived haste as well as language written into the government resolutions that calls on the N.C. Department of Transportation to move forward with an interstate route called Alternative 3C, which they feel hasn’t been properly scrutinized. maPPing tHe futuRe Hunt says the working group’s efforts began in earnest after Statehouse Rep. nathan Ramsey won election in 2012. “After Nathan Ramsey took office, he chose to push it from his seat,” Hunt says. “We sensed it was time for a responsible group of community leaders to get together. It started as comparing notes: Are there ways we could do this thing more efficiently? This self-selected group emerged to keep the dialogue going.” Group members were also spurred by a new state law that overhauls how the N.C. Department of Transportation
determines its funding priorities. The new approach will rate projects across the state for need and cost-benefits later this year. It will also take into account support from local governments. N.C. DOT Construction Engineer Ricky tipton pitched commissioners March 18 on supporting the $230 million Alternative 3C plan, which routes the future interstate across the French Broad River and then northwest of Westgate Shopping Center. Compared to previous routes considered over the years, 3C “reduces the footprint” and “eliminates impacts to the Emma neighborhood on Boone Street,” he said. Construction would require the relocation of 19 homes and 15 businesses. An earlier variation of that route dubbed “Alternative 3” by the N.C. DOT would’ve required almost twice as many total relocations and cost $20 million more, he said. Tipton said that the N.C. DOT was not seeking final approval of
The authors say that the language backing Alternative 3C doesn’t mean the route will be set in stone, depending on funding opportunities and the completion of an environmental impact statement. “There will be quite a bit of additional community input for the N.C. DOT to make adjustments and changes and things,” Belcher says. “Where we are now is at the need to make a very limited decision. … The city and the county are committing to no more than they have to to keep this project alive,” adds Mayfield. However, the long-term implications of the resolution’s language have emerged as a point of contention. Speaking on behalf of a neighborhood group calling itself the I-26 ConnectUs Project, Asheville resident steve Rasmussen said March 18 it was premature for local governments to endorse a plan prior to an environmental impact statement. Noting that the group is made up of representatives from the neighborhoods that stand to be the most impacted by the construction, including West Asheville, Burton Street and Montford, Rasmussen added: “Endorsing the least expensive alternative at this point, even for the limited purpose of prioritization, creates a very real risk that our community will be locked into that alternative in the future even if the EIS reveals another alternative is more beneficial.” Architects with the Asheville Design Center, a nonprofit that has been involved in I-26 planning efforts since 2007, echo that sentiment. “We are concerned that the new formula for ranking statewide projects favors the least expensive alternative over other important design requirements that will impact our community for years to
come,” the organization said in a statement released to local media March 18. Instead, the group prefers more expensive plans called “Alternative 4” and “Alternative 4B” which would “provide safer movements that remove interstate traffic from the Bowen Bridges.” no easy answeRs Meanwhile, Hunt says he understands the concerns, revealing that the working group was on the verge of splitting up several times due to disagreements. “It’s not something everyone agrees with 100 percent, but it could function,” Hunt says. “This is not a unanimous endorsement. We don’t all see this exactly the same.” He adds that Alternative 3C “is not what I would choose if I had my choice in this matter. “But pragmatically, we’re dealing with people with different views, people with different levels of power, with different agendas. My take is insisting on idealized outcomes and holding out only for that doesn’t necessarily yield a productive outcome. This is a very strong effort to find some commonalities, a ‘sweet spot’ of how to move forward.” The resolution does include language asking the N.C. DOT to “clearly include elements that will address community needs for sound barriers and bicycle, pedestrian and neighborhood connections, including location, design, and the funding methodology of associated infrastructure elements.” Buncombe County Board of Commissioners Chair david gantt and Newman pointed to that language before supporting the measure March 18. “We’re looking for a way to bring connectivity and better bicycle
infrastructure,” said Newman. The resolution notes that the city of Asheville has designated $1 million in funding for the project to “support critically needed community-connectivity features.” But in terms of the $230 million funding request, the Alternate 3C proposal focuses only on interstate construction. And Commissioner mike fryar asserts that the idea of the N.C. DOT ranking the project based on that funding number and then allowing local governments to request more money for significant adjustments is “fake.” “The fact is if we get scored at $230 million, that’s what we’re scored at. I don’t think we can go back,” Fryar said March 18, explaining that he supports the proposal as is and doesn’t want to spend more money on studies. The influential French Broad River Metropolitan Planning Organization board will meet March 27 to consider the proposal. Hunt, Newman, Jones and Davis sit on that board. The N.C. DOT will finalize its list of state construction priorities this fall. The agency will organize a public hearing on the project in early May, although a specific date and location has not been set yet, according to Tipton. It’s unlikely that an environmental impact statement would be completed until 2016, he says. In the meantime, Gantt acknowledged March 18 that “there’s no easy answers here.” “The one thing we know for sure,” he said, “is if we don’t get in line, and don’t have the political guts to do something about this, other communities can build their roads, we’ll go to the bottom of the list, and we will never have the money. … We want to get something done.” X
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fRee Listings onLine (best) http://www.mountainx.com/events/submission
PRotectoRs of tHe wateRsHed: Asheville couldn’t have fun festivals like Riverlink’s Anything that Floats parade without the hard work of local volunteers who adopt streams and greenways to keep them clean. Find out how you can help keep our rivers beautiful by attending Riverlink’s Adopt-A-Stream and Green Way Information Session on March 31. (p.17)
e-maiL (second best) email@example.com fax (next best) (828) 251-1311, Attn: Free Calendar maiL Free Calendar, Mountain Xpress, P.O. Box 144, Asheville, NC 28802 in PeRson Mountain Xpress, 2 Wall St. (the Miles Building), second floor, downtown Asheville. Please limit your submission to 40 words or less. Questions? Call (828) 251-1333, ext. 365. Paid Listings Paid listings lead the calendar sections in which they are placed, and are marked (pd.). To submit a paid listing, send it to our Classified Department by any of the following methods. Be sure to include your phone number, for billing purposes. e-maiL firstname.lastname@example.org. fax (828) 251-1311, Attn: Commercial Calendar maiL Commercial Calendar, Mountain Xpress, P.O. Box 144, Asheville, NC 28802 in PeRson Classified Dept., Mountain Xpress, 2 Wall St. (the Miles Building), Ste. 214, downtown Asheville. Questions? Call our Classified Department at (828) 251-1333, ext. 335.
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AnimAls HorsebAck riding instruction (pd.) By retired horse show judge. Learn to ride correctly for pleasure or show. All levelsyour stable/horse or mine. Call 450-2724. Email: HorsebackHill@ yahoo.com or visit www.horsebackhill.webs.com Pet loss suPPort grouP • 1st WEDNESDAYS, 6pm - 1 Edwin Place. Free. Info: 258-3229.
benefits Are you smArter tHAn A fiftH grAder? • Through (4/9) - Registration is open for this quiz event on April 10 that benefits children first/ cis.
$250 per team. Info: childrenfirstcisbc.org or 259-9717.
Ave. Tickets & info: ashevilledowntown.org.
leAf scHools And streets
AsHeville tAlent slAm • SA (3/29)- Ticket sales for this local talent showcase benefit eblen charities. Held at The Grey Eagle, 185 Clingman Ave. $15/$10 advance. Info: bioflyer.wordpress. com.
duPont 12k forest trAil rAce • SA (3/29) - Proceeds benefit the duPont state forest. Meets in the Guion Farm Access Area. Info: avl. mx/04s.
Admission benefits this arts educa-
bike donAtion drive • TU (4/1) through WE (4/30) Asheville reCyclery will accept bikes and bike parts for donation to kids and adults. Located at 90 Biltmore Ave., Tue.-Thu.:4-8pm; Sat: 1-5pm. Info: josephcrawley@ gmail.com or 255-7916. downtown After 5 kickoff PArty • WE (3/26), 7pm - Includes a performance by Empire Strikes Brass. Admission benefits Asheville downtown Association. $5. Held at The Orange Peel, 101 Biltmore
emPty bowls dinner • WE (3/26), 5-7pm - Dinner and silent auction to benefit neighbors in need. $15. Mars Hill Baptist Church, 67 N. Main St., Mars Hill. Info: 689-1304. HoPe cHest for women 5k • Through FR (4/4) - Registration is open for this April 6 event raising funds for women in wnc diagnosed with breast or gynecologic cancer. $30/ $25 advance/ $20 before March 28. Info: hopechestforwomen.org/ conqueracove.
• WEDNESDAYS, 5-7pm tion program. Held at 5 Walnut Wine Bar, 5 Walnut St. $5. Info: theleaf.org. wAlk to end luPus now • Through (5/16) - Registration is open for this May 17 walk to raising funds for lupus foundation of America. Participants agree to raise $100 for the foundation. Registration and info: lupusnc.org or 877-849-8271. women veterAns tribute And benefit • SA (3/29), 3-5pm - Donations benefit Aura Home, a women veterans' transitional home. Held at Jubilee, 46 Wall St. Info: amvetsnc.org/ women.
business & tecHnology AsHeville mAkers • TUESDAYS, 6pm - Open to interested non-members. Top Floor Studio Coworking, 9 Walnut St. Info: ashevillemakerspace.org. AsHeville score counselors to smAll business Seminars are held in room 2046, A-B Tech's Small Business Center, 1465 Sand Hill Rd, Candler. Free. Info: ashevillescore.org or 2714786. • SA (3/29), 9am-noon - "Selling in the 21st Century." • WE (4/2), 6-9pm - "Basic Internet Marketing.” goodwill cAreer clAsses Info and registration: 2989023, ext. 1106. • ONGOING - Classes for careers in the food and hotel industries will include training and American Hotel and Lodging Association Certification. Call for times. $25. • TUESDAYS through THURSDAYS, 9am-noon Adult basic education / high school equivalency classes. Registration required. • MONDAYS & WEDNESDAYS, 5:30-8:30pm - English as a second language classes. Registration required. Free. • ONGOING - Entry level computer classes. Call for times. Free. • TUESDAYS & THURSDAYS, 12:30-3:30pm - Medical office support career classes. Fee waives for job seekers. Registration required. our nAtive AmericAn business network trAining • TU (3/25) & WE (3/26), 10am-2pm - Sponsored by the Sequoyah Fund for small businesses. Held at Qualla Arts and Crafts Cooperative, 645 Tsali Blvd., Cherokee. Free. Registration and info: 359-5005.
clAsses, meetings & events celtic soul crAft tour meeting (pd.) Local meet up for interest in women's retreat to Loch Lomond, Scotland
this summer. Day trips, meditation & art. Meet up 3/29 1 PM upstairs @ the French Broad Chocolate Lounge. Check website for details. www.celticsoulcraft. com/tour fine woodworking clAsses (pd.) Continue at City of Asheville's Harvest House Community Center! Next session begins Tuesday, April 1, 9 am-Noon and meets every Tuesday for 8 weeks. • Taught by professional woodworker and instructor Robert Haase, for all experience levels. More info at: (828) 350-2051 or MPolites@ashevillenc.gov or email@example.com beAverdAm vAlley community AssociAtion droP-in • SA (3/29), noon- 5pm Open to residents of the Beaverdam community to share ideas and concerns. Held at 450 Beaverdam Road. Info: firstname.lastname@example.org. Henderson county HeritAge museum Located in the Historic Courthouse on Main St., Hendersonville. Free. Info: hendersoncountymuseum. org or 694-1619. • TU (4/1) through WE (12/31) - Coming of the Railroad, Civil War exhibit lAnd of sky toAstmAsters club • TUESDAYS, 7am - Meets at the Reuter YMCA, 3 Town Square Blvd. Info: edwmcg@ aol.com. lilliAn exum clement stAfford exHibit • Through MO (3/31) Chronicles the first female legislator in the South. Held at Pack Memorial Library, 67 Haywood St., in the North Carolina room. Info: 2504740. remembering rAvensbrück: women And tHe HolocAust • Through SA (3/29) - A traveling historical exhibition documenting life in this Nazi concentration camp for women. Held in UNCA's Karpen Hall. Free. Info: unca.edu. Opening and lecture with Ricard Harker: March 18, 7pm. tAx AssistAnce Local libraries will offer federal & state tax assistance
until April 15. Attendees must bring required documents. Info: 277-8288. • MONDAYS & WEDNESDAYS, 10am-4pm - Pack Memorial Library, 67 Haywood St. • THURSDAYS, 10am-4pm - Weaverville Library, 41 N. Main St. • SATURDAYS, 10:30am2:30pm - Pack Memorial Library, 67 Haywood St. Not available March 15. • TUESDAYS, 9am-4pm West Asheville Library, 942 Haywood Road. • 10am-4pm - Black Mountain Library, 105 N. Dougherty St. wcu nursing educAtion fAir • SA (3/29), 10am-2pm Held at the WCU building in Biltmore Park Town Square, 28 Schenck Parkway, Suite 300. Free. Info: nursing.wcu. edu, email@example.com or 654-6506. west AfricAn drum clAss • SATURDAYS through (4/26), 4pm - All levels welcome. Carver Community Center, 101 Carver Ave., Black Mountain. Free. Info: firstname.lastname@example.org. wingAte mbA ProgrAm info session • WE (3/26), 6:30pm Held at 220 Fifth Ave., Hendersonville. Free. Info: email@example.com or 980-359-1031.
dAnce beginner swing dAncing lessons (pd.) 4 week series starts first Tuesday of every month at 7:30pm. $10/week per person. • No partner necessary. Eleven on Grove, downtown Asheville. Details: www.swingAsheville.com dAnce clAsses witH dAnceclub (pd.) Mondays: 6pm, "Flashmobbing", learn a dance to "Poison"! and Flashmob, starts March 31 • Tuesdays: 6:30pm: Jazz/Funk - Dance and Sweat with James Brown! • Wednesdays: 6pm, Beginner Modern, 4 Week Series starts April 9. • Wednesdays, 7:30pm, Intro to Burlesque, Starts April 2 • Thursdays: 10am - Booty Camp exercise class! • Saturdays: 1-3pm
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
by Grady Cooper & Carrie Eidson
Send your event listings to firstname.lastname@example.org.
- Burlesque Striptease Workshop with bubbly, April 12. • Pre-register: (828) 275-8628 or email@example.com or danceclubAsheville.com studio ZAHiyA, downtown dAnce clAsses (pd.) Tuesday 9am Hip Hop Wrkt 6pm Bellydance 1 7pm Bellydance 2 8pm West African • Wednesday 6pm Bellydance 3 • Thursday 9am Hip Hop Wrkt 10am Bellydance Wrkt 4pm Kid's Dance 5pm Teen Dance 6pm AfroBrazilian 7pm West African • Sunday 5:15pm Yoga • $13 for 60 minute classes. 90 1/2 N. Lexington Avenue. www.studiozahiya. com :: (828) 242-7595 line dAnce clAsses • WEDNESDAYS, 9-10:30am - Held in the County Athletics and Activity Center, 708 South Grove St., Hendersonville. Registration required. $5. Info: linedanceclass.com or 890-5777.
Bikes for others wHat: Bike donation drive for the Asheville reCyclery wHeRe: The basement of the French Broad Food Co-Op, 90 Biltmore Ave. wHen: Starting Tuesday, April 1, and lasting until the end of the month wHy: Donated bikes, bike parts and accessories will go directly toward building and repairing bikes for the adults and kids of the community. The Asheville reCyclery is a nonprofit bike shop where people can bring their damaged bikes and use the donated tools, parts, accessories and expertise of shop volunteers to fix them up. The shop also works to provide the
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
bike-less with free or low-cost bikes — a grassroots way to increase access to a sustainable form of transportation. During April, the reCyclery is holding a monthlong donation drive to help facilitate this endeavor. “We’re always real slow through the winter months, and then it picks up at the beginning of the year,” said Joseph Crawley, who helped start the reCyclery in 2001 and has been volunteering ever since. “People can always come in and use the shop and tools for free and get our advice.” Regular hours for item/bike drop-off are 4-8 p.m. Tuesdays through Thursdays, and 1-5 p.m. Saturdays. For more information about the drive, contact Crawley at firstname.lastname@example.org. — by Tanner Hall
'living witH beArs' informAtion session • WE (4/2), 7pm - Presented by Haw Creek Community Association. Held at Groce United Methodist Church, 954 Tunnel Road. Info: hawcreeknc.org. counter culture coffee sustAinAble sPring initiAtive • FRIDAYS (through 3/28), 11:30am - Classes on various topics in sustainability. Meets at 77 Broadway. Free to attend. Info: counterculturecoffee.com. mytHs & fActs About bird feeding PresentAtion TU (4/1), 7pm - Held at Fairview Library, 1 Taylor Road. Info: 250-6484 or email@example.com. vermicomPosting worksHoP • WE (3/26), 6:30-8:30pm Held at the Environmental & Conservation Organization office, 611 N. Church St., Suite 101, Hendersonville. $15. Registration and info: 692-0385. wnc sierrA club PresentAtion • WE (4/2), 7pm - "Beyond Coal: Success and Future Plans." Held at Unitarian
Universalist Congregation, 1 Edwin Place. Info: wenoca. org or 251-8289.
food & beer beer city science At colburn eArtH science museum • FR (3/28), 5:30pm - Located in Pack Place, 2 South Pack Square. Free to attend. Info: 254-7162 or www.colburnmuseum.org. gluten-free food exPo • SA (3/29), 10am-2pm - Held at UNCA's Kimmel Arena. $5/Free under 12. Info: ingles-markets.com/ask_leah or 800-334-4936.
government & Politics AsHeville-buncombe county food Policy council meeting • WE (4/2), 5:30pm - Includes community input opportunities and an orientation for prospective members at 4pm. 227 Campus Drive. Info: abfoodpolicy.org. buncombe county rePublicAn PArty convention • SU (3/29), 8:30am - Held in Ferguson Auditorium on the A-B Tech Campus. Info: buncombegop.org. frencH broAd river mPo boArd meeting • TH (3/27), 12:30pm - Held at Land-of-Sky Regional Council offices, 339 New Leicester Hwy., Suite 130. Info: fbrmpo.org lAnd-of-sky regionAl council Info: 251-6622 or landofsky. org. • TH (3/27), noon Transportation advisory committee. Meets at 339 New Leicester Highway, Suite 130.
kids dAnce clAsses At blAck mountAin center for tHe Arts 225 W. State St., Black Mountain. Registration Required. Info: blackmountainarts.org or 669-0930. • MONDAYS, 4-5pm & THURSDAYS, 4:30-5:30pm - Beginners Hip Hop. Ages 6-10. • THURSDAYS, 3:30-4:30pm Kids in Motion. Ages 3 to 5.
• SATURDAYS, 9am - Ballet. • MONDAYS, 5-6pm - Teen Dance, ages 11-15. friends of blAck mountAin librAry sHort story contest Through (4/15), 6pm - For kids up to age 17. Stories may be submitted at 105 N. Dougherty St., Black Mountain. Info and guidelines: 250-4756. greening uP tHe mountAins Poetry contest • Through (4/1) - Open to Jackson County students, K-12. Submit entries at City Lights Bookstore, 3 E. Jackson St. or email to firstname.lastname@example.org. HAnds on! 318 N. Main St., Hendersonville. $5 admission/ free for members, unless otherwise noted. Info: handsonwnc.org or 697-8333. • TH (3/27), 4-7pm Kindergarten Readiness Rally. • SA (3/29), 7-9pm - Family Science Night. PArks And recreAtion dePArtment's fit kids clAss • TUESDAYS & THURSDAYS through (4/10) - For age 6-11. Meets at StephensLee Recreation Center, 30 George Washington Carver Ave. Info: email@example.com. wAynesville PArks & rec outdoor ProgrAm • THURSDAYS, 4:30-7:45pm - For grades 3-6. Held at 550 Vance St., Waynesville. $8/$5 members. Info: firstname.lastname@example.org or 456-2030.
outdoors cerro sAn lorenZo climbing triP slidesHow • WE (3/26), 7-8pm - A trip through the Patagonian Andes. Held at REI, 31 Schenck Parkway. Free. Info: 687-0918. lAke JAmes stAte PArk 6883 N.C. Highway 126, Nebo. Programs are free unless otherwise noted. Info: 584-7728. • SU (3/30), 2pm - Wetlands hike. Meets at park office in Catawba River area. trAil running bAsics clAss • TH (3/27), 7-8:30pm - Held at REI, 31 Schenck Parkway.
Free with registration required. Info: 687-0918.
PArenting HeArtsPeAk for PArents & kids • THURSDAYS, 5-6pm - Ages 8 and up. Held at Rainbow Community School, 574 Haywood Road. Registration and info: email@example.com or 545-9681. sAcred mountAin sAnctuAry oPen House • WE (3/26), 4:30pm - For grades 1-8. Located on Rocky Cove Road, Candler. Info and directions: sacredmountainsanctuary@gmail. com.
sPirituAlity Aim meditAtion clAsses (pd.) "ramp up your meditation practice with AIM’s Meditation’s Classes: mindfulness 101 - Basics of Mindfulness Meditation, mindfulness 102 - More advanced, intermediate class. Class dates and times: www.ashevillemeditation. com/events, (828) 808-4444 AsHeville insigHt meditAtion (pd.) introduction to mindfulness meditAtion Learn how to get a Mindfulness Meditation practice started. 2nd & 4th Wednesdays. 7pm – 8:30. Asheville Insight Meditation, 29 Ravenscroft Dr, Suite 200, (828) 8084444, www.ashevillemeditation.com
democrAtic surround And tHe forgotten History of multimediA • FR (3/28), 7:30pm - With Fred Turner. Held at Black Mountain College Museum + Arts Center, 56 Broadway. $8/$5 students & members. Info: blackmountaincollege. org or 350-8484.
AsHeville oPen HeArt meditAtion (pd.) Deepen your experience of living a heart centered life. Connect with your spiritual heart and the peace residing within. Free, 7pm Tuesdays, 5 Covington St., 296-0017, www.heartsanctuary.org
Public lectures At uncA Free unless otherwise noted. Info: unca.edu. • TH (3/27), 6pm - "The Black Thief Stereotype: Shopping While Black and Consumer Racial Profiling." Sherrill Center, Mountain View room. • TH (3/27), 7:30pm - "4000 years of Andean Gold." Ramsey Library, Whitman Room. • TU (4/1), 7:30pm - World Affairs Council: "Cuba in Reach?" $10/free for UNCA students. Reuter Center. • TU (4/1), 6pm "Music, Language and Mathematics." Karpen Hall. • TH (4/3), 7pm "Sisterhood Tweets and Blogs into the 21st Century." Humanities Lecture Hall.
gurdJieff: tHe fourtH wAy (pd.) In search of the miraculous? What are the possibilities of inner evolution? New groups forming for those who wish to pursue inner work. (828) 232-2220. www.gurdjieff-foundationwnc.org
seniors Adult forum At fcc • SU (3/30), 9:15am - “Hospice Care and Advance Care Planning.” 1735 5th Ave., Hendersonville. In the Felix building. Info: fcchendersonville.org or 692-8630.
mindfulness meditAtion (pd.) "AsHeville insigHt meditAtion Deepen your authentic presence, and cultivate a happier, more peaceful mind by practicing Insight (Vipassana) Meditation in a supportive community. Group Meditation. Thursdays, 7pm8:30pm. Sundays, 10am11:30pm. 29 Ravenscroft Dr., Suite 200, Asheville, (828) 808-4444, www.ashevillemeditation.com mindfulness meditAtion clAss (pd.) Explore the miracle of healing into life through deepened stillness and presence. With consciousness teacher and columnist Bill Walz. Mondays, 6:307:30pm: Meditation class with lesson and discussions
in contemporary Zen living. Asheville Friends Meeting House, 227 Edgewood Ave. (off Merrimon). Donation. Info: 258-3241. www.billwalz.com tHe sHAmAnic Journey: A PAtH of direct revelAtion (pd.) Join a Circle of exploration into the ancient cosmology and guiding principles of Core Shamanism. Initiations through specific guided journeys will be facilitated by Desiree DeMars and Marilyn Kenoyer in this 4 Part Series starting Sunday, April 6th, including April 20th, May 4th and May 18th at The Healing House in Asheville. The cost is $150 with registration by March 30th. If you are interested and have no previous journeying experience, an Introductory Training Session will be arranged. For More Details Call Desiree at: 312-437-4325 or www.thelightfromwithin. org. A course of love • WEDNESDAYS, 6:30pm A class on spiritual transformation. Info and directions: 505-4013 or firstname.lastname@example.org. AsHeville sHAmAnic Journey circle • WEDNESDAYS, 6:309pm - Shamanic Journey experience required. $10. Registration and info: dreamtimejourneys.net or 398-0630.
Mike Byer Auto and Truck Repair, Inc.
Hybrid Vehicle Service and Maintenance Asheville’s Hybrid Specialist. We service all things hybrid. All levels of maintenance and repair. HV (main hybrid battery) replacement with options for new or remanufactured batteries available. If you have a hybrid question or concern please contact us.
135 Coxe Ave • Asheville, NC • (828) 258-0548
dHArmA reAding And discussion • THURSDAYS, 7pm - Held at Shambhala Meditation Center, 19 Westwood Place. Free. Info: asheville.shambhala.org. fAmily meditAtion witH rev. teiJo munnicH • Last SUNDAYS, 10:30amnoon - Held at Great Tree Zen Temple, 679 Lower Flat Creek, Alexander. Info: greattreetemple.org or 645-2085. grAce lutHerAn cHurcH 1245 Sixth Ave. W., Hendersonville. Info: gracelutherannc.com or 693-4890. • WEDNESDAYS through (4/9), 4:45pm - Lenten supper in Stull Hall. Reservations required.
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
by Grady Cooper & Carrie Eidson
Send your event listings to email@example.com.
Sci-Fi Tour reAding witH AutHor J.c. wAlkuP • SA (3/29), 3pm - Held at Blue Ridge Books, 152 S. Main St., Waynesville. Info: blueridgebooksnc.com or 456-6000. recePtion for sAndburg writer-inresidence • FR (3/28), 5-7pm - With author Adam Bresson. Henderson County Chamber of Commerce, 204 Kanuga Road, Hendersonville. Info: bps.gov/carl or 693-4178. sketcHbook ProJect mobile librAry • WE (3/26), 1-5pm - A traveling library of artist sketchbooks. Parks at Asheville BookWorks, 428 1/2 Haywood Road. Free. Info: sketchbookproject.com.
giRLs gone sci-fi: On March 29, Malaprop’s will host female young adult science fiction writers, including Jessica Brody, Tamara Ireland Stone, Lauren Miller and Jessica Khoury (pictured) for a discussion of strong female heroines, challenging plot lines and escaping the ordinary. (p.16)
introductory lectures on tHe tm tecHnique • THURSDAYS, 6:30 pm Held at Asheville Center for Transcendental Meditation, 165 E. Chestnut. Free. Info: 2544350 or meditationasheville.org meditAtion And mindfulness PrActices • SUNDAYS, 6-6:45 pm - Held at Asheville Yoga Center, 211 S. Liberty St. Free. Info: youryoga.com. mindfulness trAining At cloud cottAge • WE (3/26), 1:30-3:30pm "Breathing Lessons" for addictions professionals. 219 Old Toll Circle, Black Mountain. Info: cloudcottage.org or 6696000. musicAl celebrAtion of life • SUNDAYS, 11am - Held at Center For Spiritual Living, 2 Science of Mind Way. Free. Info: cslasheville.org or 2317638. PAssover 101 clAss • TU (4/1), 6:30pm - Hosted by Chabad House, 660 Merrimon Ave. $18. Info: firstname.lastname@example.org. wnc green congregAtion PrAyer
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breAkfAst • MO (3/31), 9-10:30am - Held at Cathedral of All Souls, 9 Swan St. Registration and info: email@example.com or 258-8737. women's book study And discussion grouP • MONDAYS, 7-8:30pm Meets at Seacoast Asheville, 123 Sweeten Creek Road. Registration and info: 2776400. wudAng tAi Ji quAn clAss • SUNDAYS, 11-noon - Held at French Broad Co-op Movement and Learning Center, 90 Biltmore Ave. $12. Info: firstname.lastname@example.org or (401) 714-1051.
sPoken & written word APPAlAcHiAn food storybAnk orAl History trAining • SU (3/30), 1-5pm - Held at NC Department of Cultural Resources, 176 Riceville Road. Registration required. $20+ on a sliding scale. Info: slowfoodasheville.org.
buncombe county Public librAries librAry AbbreviAtions - All programs are free unless otherwise noted. Each Library event is marked by the following location abbreviations: n ec = Enka-Candler Library (1404 Sandhill Road, 2504758) n sw = Swannanoa Library (101 West Charleston Street, 250-6486) • WE (3/26), 10am Swannanoa sewing circle. sw • SA (3/29), 10am-4pm Volunteer clean-up day. sw • MO (3/31), 10:30am Movement based story time. ec mAlAProP's bookstore And cAfe 55 Haywood St. Info: malaprops.com or 254-6734. Events are free, unless otherwise noted. • WE (3/26), 7pm - Natalie Goldberg discusses her book Living Color. • TH (3/27), 7pm - Ron Rash discusses his book Nothing Gold Can Stay • FR (3/28), 7pm - Christy Jordan discusses her book Come Home to Supper • SA (3/29), 7pm - Girls Gone
sPellbound cHildren's booksHoP 50 N. Merrimon Ave. Free, unless otherwise noted. Info: spellboundchildrensbookshop.com or 708-7570. • WE (3/26), 5-6pm - First in a Series Club: Spirit Animals stories from tHe emerAld isle • MO (3/31), 6:30pm - Celtic and Irish folktales. Held at Fletcher Public Library, 120 Library Road, Fletcher. Free. wcu sPring literAry festivAl All event free unless otherwise noted. Info: litfestival. org. • MO (3/31), 4 pm Nonfiction writer David Cecelski in the University Center theater. • MO (3/31), 7:30 pm Fiction/nonfiction writer Luis Alberto Urrea. In the University Center theater. • MO (3/31), noon - GilbertChappel Distinguished Poets Series. In the University Center theater. • TU (4/1), 4 pm - Poet Ron Houchin in the University Center theater. • TU (4/1), 8pm - Poet and writer Linda Hogan in the University Center theater. • TU (4/1), 7:30 pm - Robert Conley Tribute. In the University Center theater. • WE (4/2), 4 pm Nonfiction writer Charles F. Price and fiction writer Donna Glee Williams. In the University Center theater. • WE (4/2), 7 pm - Fiction writer Jill McCorkle. Sylva Public Library, 310 Keener St. • TH (4/3), 2pm - Narrative4
Panel. NCCAT building. • TH (4/3), 4pm - Fiction writer George Singleton. University Center theater. • TH (4/3), 7:30 pm - Fiction writer Colum McCann. Coulter Recital Hall.
volunteering AsHeville AreA HAbitAt for HumAnity Builds new homes for qualifying families and individuals while preservering existing homes. Info: email@example.com. • ONGOING - Volunteers needed for administrative office to greet visitors, answer phones. AsHeville city scHools foundAtion Works to create strong public schools and break the cycle of poverty. Info: jay@ acsf.org or 350-6135. • ONGOING - Volunteers need to tutor/mentor students (K-12). Shifts are available Mon.-Fri., 8am-6pm. big brotHers big sisters of wnc Helps children thrive through partnerships with trained adult mentors. Info: bbbswnc.org or 253-1470. • ONGOING - Volunteers age 18+ needed to accompany youth twice a month to free or low-cost activities. Volunteers age 16+ needed to mentor one hour per week. • ONGOING - Big Brothers Big Sisters is looking for volunteers age 18 and older to share outings in the community twice a month with youth from single-parent homes. Activities are free or low-cost. cHArlie's Angels AnimAl rescue A shelter and foster network for area cats and dogs based in Fletcher. Info: wncanimalrescue.org or 885-3647. • ONGOING - Volunteers are needed to foster a dog for 2 to 3 weeks. No costs involved. cHildren first cis of buncombe county Provides programs to economically disadvantaged children & families. Info: childrenfirstbc.org. • ONGOING - Volunteers needed for learning centers and after school program for elementary school chil-
dren living in public and low-income housing. Mon.Thurs., 2:30-5:30pm. girl scouts cArolinAs PeAk to Piedmont Works to foster leadership and self-esteem in girls ages 5-17. Info: girlscoutsp2p.org or 800-672-2148. • ONGOING - Volunteers needed age 18+, especially to be troop leaders. Membership in Girl Scouts required. girls on tHe run A nonprofit teaching selfrespect and healthy living to girls. Info: gotrwnc.org. • Through (5/16) Volunteers needed for the 5k held at UNCA on May 17. guArdiAn Ad litem Advocates for neglected and abused children in Henderson, Polk, Transylvania and McDowell counties. Info: 694-4215. • ONGOING - Volunteers needed to track case progress and help children express their wishes. Average case: 3-9 months. Training provided. literAcy council of buncombe county Works to increase literacy and English language skills. Info: volunteers@litcouncil. com or 254-3442. • ONGOING - Volunteers needed for the Adult Education Program, which teaches basic reading, writing and spelling. Previous teaching experience not required. • ONGOING - Volunteers needed for the Augustine Program which works with low-income children reading below grade level. Previous teaching experience not required. loving food resources A special needs food pantry providing food and other items to persons living with HIV/AIDS or in hospice with any diagnosis. Info: admin@ lovingfood.org or 255-9282. • ONGOING - Volunteers needed for stocking, helping clients shop, driving, food box delivery, sorting, graphic design and office assistance. Hours: Tue.-Friday: 9am-noon, Sat. 9am-2pm. mAnnA foodbAnk Processes donated food for distribution throughout WNC. Info: mannafoodbank. org or 299-3663.
• ONGOING - Volunteers need to work in the warehouse. Mon.-Sat. daytime and Thurs. evening. mountAin AreA HeAltH educAtion center Works for quality health care through professional training. Info: volunteer@ mahec.net • ONGOING - Volunteers with strong customer service skills needed for OBGYN practice and family health center in Biltmore. 6-month commitment requested. oPPortunity House Info: 698-5517 or opportunityhouse.org. • ONGOING - Volunteers needed to help in the thrift store and at the front desk. riverlink Works for the economic and environmental revitalization of the French Broad River and its tributaries. Info: 252-8474, ext. 18 or firstname.lastname@example.org. • MO (3/31), 5pm Information session for
Adopt-a-stream and Adopta-greenway programs. tHe rAtHbun center Provides free lodging for patients & caregivers in Asheville for medical treatment. Info: rathbuncenter. org or 251-0595. • ONGOING - Volunteers need to support and register guests. Weekend shifts: noon-3pm, 3-6pm and 6-9pm. wnc Aids ProJect Provides resources and support for AIDS patients and their families. Info: wncap.org or 252-7489. • ONGOING - Office/clerical volunteers needed for data entry and computerrelated tasks during daytime office hours Mon.-Fri. • ONGOING - Saturday morning volunteers needed to deliver food boxes to homebound men and women with HIV/AIDS in the Asheville/Buncombe area. Good driving record and confidentiality required.
ymcA of wnc Works to build strong kids, families and communities in mind, body and spirit. Info: ymcawnc.org or 210-2265. • ONGOING - Volunteers needed for the Rise & Reach Mentoring Program. Mentees are students in the YMCA's at-risk afterschool programs. Background check required. ywcA Advocates for young women’s leadership and welfare. Info: 254-7206, ex. 219. • ONGOING - Volunteers need for a variety of tasks in the child care department. A background check, medical questionnaire, TB screening and a minimum age of 16 are required. cAlendAr deAdline The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m. wednesdAy, one week prior to publication. Questions? Call (828)2511333, ext. 365
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maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
Asheville Disclaimer by Tom Scheve
Find local live standup comedy events at www.DisclaimerComedy.com (and you should follow us on Twitter at @AVLdisclaimer). The Most Beloved Page in All the Land
asheville disclaimer Rep. Mofﬁtt makes political opponent an offer he can refuse
Briefs Local outbreak of Norovirus has author eying sequel to Everybody Poops Biltmore Estate ranked ﬁrst among WNC tourist attractions State of WNC dental health is tops among tourist revulsions
Black Mountain rock climber survives 40-foot fall, only to have doctor slip in numerous “gravity of the situation” puns US Forest Service to conduct prescribed burns near Murphy, followed by carefully planned runaway inferno, totally expected ﬁrestorm with the associated mayhem and meticulously worded denial of the predetermined nature of events Buncombe County moving forward with science/math-centered school, defying NC legislature’s ‘Plan Dumbass’ Leicester man shoots intruder, successfully joining the 15 percent of gun owners who avoid self-harm in similar incidents Tennessee to ban open alcohol in moving cars
Driving expected to drop by 40 percent Asheville Disclaimer is parody/satire Contact: firstname.lastname@example.org
Twitter: @AVLdisclaimer Contributing this week: Joe Shelton, Tom Scheve
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
ASHEVILLE, MONDAY — Rep. Tim Mofﬁtt is potentially facing an ethics inquiry following allegations that he attempted to bribe and threaten his opponent in the next election during a meeting at Travinia Italian Kitchen in Biltmore Park. “While these allegations are serious, the fact this happened in the back of an Italian restaurant is a real political no-no,” said Chris Cooper, director of the Public Policy Institute at Western Carolina University. “This fosters a stereotype that is harmful to both the Italian-American community and the Italian Restaurant Association.” Incumbent Republican Mofﬁtt is alleged to have told Democrat Brian Turner that Turner should drop out of the race for district 116 in the North Carolina Statehouse, and that Turner could instead take a position as the head of UNC-TV. Mofﬁtt suggested the headquarters could be relocated to Asheville, should Asheville still exist
as a city despite Mofﬁtt’s threats to abolish its charter in his next term. Mofﬁtt is now reportedly looking into cutting state funding for UNCTV, owing to its Rep. Tim Mofﬁtt failure to attract his political opponents as spoils for dropping out of the race. During the meeting at Travinia, Mofﬁtt also allegedly warned Turner that if Turner stayed in the race, “shadowy political forces I have no control over who meet in my campaign headquarters daily will nuke you and your family in a regrettably super-negative and super-fun campaign.” In media interviews since the allegations surfaced, Mofﬁtt has insisted he wouldn’t turn this campaign dirty unless his opponent did so ﬁrst. “Bringing to light my dirty campaign
Lest Ye Be Judged Every year, The NC Bar Association conducts a survey of local judges in order to evaluate their performance. Among the questions asked: 1. You’re pretty darned judgmental, aren’t you? 2. Would you let a guy out of jury duty if he had a super important, nonspecific thing planned, hypothetically speaking? 3. What, no powdered wig? 4. Who do you think you’re kidding with the old gavel-under-the-robe bit? 5. While you’re staring off into space, wearing a vacant smile during closing arguments, what are you thinking about? 6. Compare and contrast: Perry Mason or Matlock?
7. What’s the proper procedure for overruling a thrusting motion? 8. May I be sworn in on The Anarchist Cookbook? 9. Better Supreme: Diana Ross or Antonin Scalia? 10. Are you best described as: a. A hanging judge b. An “every defendant reminds me of my wayward son” judge c. A parable judge d. A county fair pie-eating contest judge e. An activist Constitution-as-living document judge or inactivist couchpotato judge
tactics is negative, and so therefore I am now forced to go negative in this campaign,” said Mofﬁtt, who added he regrets warning Turner ahead of time that Turner and his family would be “nuked” instead of just nuking Turner and his family without any advance warning-besides Mofﬁtt’s own reputation. Mofﬁtt to Xpress reporter: “Why write about my alleged bribing of Brian Turner when I could set you up with a job at Raleigh News & Observer?” Mofﬁtt to Travinia waitress: “Why repeat anything you heard from our bribe meeting when you should be working at Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse, with my manager friend, Chad?” Mofﬁtt to voters: “Maybe instead of voting, you could stay home and watch UNC-TV.”
Prevent the spread of norovirus
• Wipe down infected surfaces with your cleanest child. • Encourage sick children to sue for emancipation. • Remove sick children from school, unless you have a beef with the government at its lowest levels, and now it’s payback time. • Anyone can get norovirus, even really good-looking people (although their explosive vomiting and diarrhea tends to be more alluringly standoffish and mysterious). • Symptoms of norovirus infection usually include cramping, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea and the special effects from the Alien franchise. • If both you and your spouse are infected inside a home with only one bathroom, seek marriage counseling.
san fRancisco’s no. 1 PRobLem Having recently encouraged routine composting of dinner leftovers, the ecology-conscious city is now considering environmentally friendly public urinals. In the PPlanter, created by engineer Brent Bucknum, users flush the waste (using runoff from handwashing) into a bed of bamboo. Bucknum claims minimal maintenance and an odor-free experience, but due to San Francisco’s sour experience with lockable public toilets, which shielded sex acts and crime, only a user’s midsection area is blocked from public view. entRePReneuRiaL sPiRit • Branko Bogdanov, 58, his wife, Lela, 52, and daughter Julia, 34, were arrested in March and charged in a 10-year shoplifting enterprise run out of their upscale Northbrook, Ill., home, which they allegedly used as a base while prowling stores in states as far away as Florida, stealing high-end toys and jewelry, which they resold on eBay and to their fences. Police estimate the Bogdanovs swiped as much as $7 million worth, stashing many items in Lela’s customized flowing skirts with hidden pockets. • Latest female beauty Products: Cosmetic surgery is expensive, but Japanese girls and women obsessed with a more “Western” look have these low-priced alternatives, fashion blogger Liz Katz noted in January: (1) the $63 FaceSlimmer Exercise Mouthpiece (insert for three minutes a day, make vowel sounds and watch a “saggy” mouth turn taut); (2) the Beauty Lift High Nose nostril clip, which emits electronic vibrations to raise the proboscis’s profile; (3) the equally painful-looking Nose Straightener (insert for 20 minutes a day for added “perkiness”).
Full Service Restaurant Meals are served to Mountain Xpress readers
by Chuck Shepherd
Studios can digitally “remove” the condoms during post-production, but the cost is prohibitive (about $100,000 to re-digitize the estimated 90,000 frames in a typical “lowbudget” porno film). Falcon’s president said he’s exploring the use of clever lighting during filming to de-emphasize the condom. • Security and law enforcement agencies are looking beyond traditional biometric identification techniques, since fingerprints and iris scans are obtrusive, and facial recognition is of questionable accuracy. Philadelphia’s Monell Chemical Senses Center has shown that ear secretions may reveal personal identity, ethnicity, health status and sexual orientation. Meanwhile, researchers at the Polytechnic University of Madrid have found that recognizable patterns in body odor remain stable even through disease and dietary changes. Leading economic indicatoRs • Chinese farmers typically earn the equivalent of about $1,300 a year. But in Jianshe village in southwest Sichuan province, farmers have established a cooperative capitalist model, and in January officials delivered residents their annual dividend in cold cash — the equivalent of about $2.1 million to split among 438 households. Authorities unloaded banknotes in stacks that constituted a 7-foot-high wall of money, requiring villagers to pull 24-hour shifts to guard it. • With property values sky-high in posh London boroughs like Chelsea and Kensington, some superwealthy residents desiring to expand are building down, constructing elaborate, multistory basements. CNN reported in January that additions are underway for subterranean home theaters, gyms, golf simulators, bowling alleys and even swimming pools. X
science faiR • technological know-How at work: According to a January report on Salon.com, hard-core pornography fans are split over whether male actors should use condoms. California’s Falcon
Read daiLy Read News of the Weird daily with Chuck Shepherd at www.weirduniverse.net. Send items to email@example.com or PO Box 18737, Tampa FL 33679.
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maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
(CloCkwiSe from top left) Alyson
Johnson-Sawyer, Karen Austin, Mary Donnelly and Cannan Hyde
who CareS For tHe CAregiver?
Surviving trying times Story by
Lea McLellan firstname.lastname@example.org
Alicia Funderburk AliciaFunderburk.com
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
karen austin still had her own children to look after when she began caring for her mother, who’d been diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease. That was seven years ago. Soon after her mother passed away, her father began showing signs of memory loss. By 2010, it was clear that he, too, needed full-time care. “I was coming over in the morning and staying with him until I tucked him in at night,” says Austin, “and that morphed into a situation where I’ve been living with him and taking care of him 24/7 for the past two years.” By that time, Austin’s youngest child had graduated from high school, and she felt she could take on the role of full-time caregiver. “I went from working full time to working part time to not having a job at all, because I couldn’t manage even a part-time job taking care of my parents,” she explains. “So my lifestyle went from going to work and being out in the world to slowly sort of collapsing in on itself. ... Dad now is in what they call the moderate to severe stages of Alzheimer’s. So you can’t really have a conversation. Interpersonal
actions are really limited. So you need to get some sort of contact with the outside world or you will go constantly crazy. And that’s where the support groups came in.” People diagnosed with an incurable or terminal debilitating illness face challenges almost inconceivable to those who are healthy. But the impact on the loved ones who care for those patients, while fundamentally different, can be equally profound. Like Austin, karyn Robinson attends a support group through MemoryCare. Her husband was diagnosed with early onset dementia nearly 10 years ago; for the past five years, he’s been living in a facility. But while Robinson’s caregiver role has shifted, it hasn’t ended. “As he progresses, I have to progress,” she explains. “As he changes, I have to figure out how to move along with those changes. When he first went in, we could have a conversation, and he could tell me what he needed. At this point, he can’t tell me what he needs.” For both partners, that kind of identity loss must be heartbreaking. Robinson knew her husband had to leave the house when his disease progressed to the point that he threatened her life. She says her support group was instrumental in making her understand the severity of the situation, and MemoryCare staff helped her place him in a suitable facility. The Asheville-based nonprofit provides assessment, treatment and support services for people with cognitive impairment and their families. cannan Hyde lives in Black Mountain with her husband, james, who was diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment in 2010 and is now in the early stages of Alzheimer’s disease. Cannan is a retired clinical social worker; James is a retired professor of psychiatry. Since his diagnosis, the couple have been active in raising awareness about the disease and encouraging people to seek out resources and support. Cannan says she’s learned two things that are really important. “One is that I want to help people get over the stigma of this diagnosis. … People are hesitant to talk about it and to let people know, so I think that can go a long way toward helping caregivers. And the second thing is, we want people to know how much help is out there.”
iary resource for caregivers whose loved ones have dementia. And all three are exceptionally eager to educate themselves and others about long-term caregiving — whether it’s for someone with dementia or any other ailment. mary donnelly, the network’s director, knows how hard it can be to access the support and resources that caregivers of whatever sort need in order to remain healthy and connected to their communities. Her experience caring for her mother is what prompted her to start leading three dementia-related support groups for MemoryCare. Donnelly says her experience was characterized by “massive amounts of not understanding what was going on” when her once-capable, independent mother began confusing night with day and could no longer manage her finances. “We were beginning to see signs that she wasn’t eating properly, or cooking properly, or storing food properly. There was a lot more going on than we realized at the time, because you don’t know what to look for if you don’t know what to look for.” Looking back on it, says Donnelly, “You realize, ‘Gee, I wonder why I didn’t see that,’ but you don’t. Caregivers don’t see the forest for the trees: They’re just right in the middle of it.” Despite these daunting challenges, Western North Carolina is rich in resources for caregivers. Besides support groups, the MemoryCaregivers Network’s Caregiver College program helps caregivers understand their loved ones’ illnesses. CarePartners offers support groups, adult day care and education for caregivers of all kinds, not just those dealing with cognitive impairment. Elder Club, a program of Jewish Family Services of WNC, also provides respite and case management for a range of caregivers. And two other local nonprofits, the Land of Sky Regional Council and the Council on Aging of Buncombe County, help steer caregivers to the appropriate resources, including workshops, home care providers and support groups. In some cases, Land of Sky can help families cover the costs of caregiving, though that funding has decreased in recent years and there’s a waiting list. Yet for people struggling to manage both their own life and the life of the person they’re caring for, merely finding time and energy to research the available resources and access that support may feel overwhelming.
Many local reSourceS
Although their individual circumstances vary, these three women have much in common. They all care for loved ones with memory loss; they all attend support groups through the MemoryCaregivers Network, an auxil-
Confronted with a loved one’s chronic illness, caregivers often neglect their own health — a mistake as common as it is damaging, says Dr. amy cohen, medical director of CarePartners’ PACE program.
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“It goes underrecognized that caregiver health can be quite poor,” she notes. “They often have more chronic diseases themselves, and it’s like a circular argument: chicken or the egg? Is it because they’re taking care of this person and neglecting their own needs and preventive measures? Or is it that they have this increased stress?” Caregivers, notes Cohen, typically don’t feel their own health is as important as that of the person they’re caring for. “Another thing is that a lot of these people perceive that they don’t have enough time for exercise or to maintain a healthy diet,” she adds. “They just do what’s quick, which is to eat snack crackers or McDonald’s drive-thru, and therefore, they are more at risk for these diseases.” For caregivers who are already spread so thin, even simple things like having lunch with a friend, taking a walk in the woods or enjoying some time alone can be hard to arrange. Yet experienced caregivers and health professionals alike stress the importance of taking time for self-care. “It’s amazing,” says Austin. “I’ve seen it in people in our support groups who have finally gotten to the point where they put their loved one into a facility, or their loved one has passed away, and the next month they invariably look 10 years younger. You just don’t realize how much it’s wearing you down. So even if you don’t think you need it, take care of yourself,” she advises.
BarrierS to Seeking help Of course, for caregivers juggling jobs, financial burdens, family dramas and the unceasing demands of their role, finding time for proper self-care may be easier said than done. Programs such as adult day and home care can help free up time, but carol mcLimans, family care specialist at Land of Sky, says that in the four counties she serves (Buncombe, Henderson, Madison and Transylvania), there’s a waiting list for respite care. And while the demand for caregiver resources has increased considerably since the federal National Family Caregiver Support
Program was established in 2001, “the funding has gone in the opposite direction.” Still, McLimans says most of her clients qualify for a $1,000 stipend for respite care. “A big thing,” she notes, “is that caregivers don’t self-identify as caregivers: They’re just husbands, wives, sons, daughters.” nancy Hogan, family consultant for Project C.A.R.E., which partners with Land of Sky, remembers meeting a man whose wife had Parkinson’s. “I kept referring to him as the caregiver,” Hogan recalls. “And he said, ‘Is that what I am now?’ It was really kind of pointed. It was a real transition in his thinking.” Shame, guilt and denial can also keep caregivers from seeking assistance, says Cannan. “People need to realize that hiding this, or keeping it a secret, or not asking for help doesn’t make sense, now that there is so much available,” she points out. “Part of it is that they’re embarrassed or ashamed or think it’s a sign of weakness, but if they can work through that, what they find is not only is it helpful for them, but then they can be more helpful to other people.”
reSpite Adult day care programs serve a wide range of participants, providing muchneeded social stimulation. Most local programs charge a flat rate per day, and some have medical staff on hand. “It provides a social setting that’s safe and is pretty unique,” says alyson johnson-sawyer, executive director of adult day services at CarePartners. “Participants who have moderate to more severe impairments,” she notes, “aren’t going to fit in with other types of social situations very well. For instance, they might be embarrassed if they have difficulty finding the right words and that kind of thing. But in this setting, it’s very loving and safe and welcoming, and it’s really neat to see people establish friendships and sometimes even romantic relationships.” In addition to activities such as Oscarviewing parties and crafts, CarePartners’ adult day care program includes medical staff who can administer medications, monitor blood sugar and perform other basic functions. Socializing has huge health benefits for the participants, and
“Don’t believe a caregiver when they say, ‘Oh, we’re fine, thanks.’ They are not.” — Mary Donnelly, Memory Caregivers Network
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
meanwhile, says Johnson-Sawyer, caregivers get a break. Jewish Family Services’ Elder Club welcomes participants of all faiths. Executive Director alison gilreath says caregivers often tell her they “used to play bridge” or “used to garden” but have lost touch with those hobbies. “It’s important to find something they can do for themselves, even if it’s just a few hours a week,” she stresses. Of course, caregivers don’t necessarily use that extra time to relax. “Ideally, they use it to refresh themselves, so they can go back and do their job effectively,” notes Hogan of Project C.A.R.E. Unfortunately, however, “If you’re just not used to having a lot of free time, you feel pressure to get a lot accomplished and don’t even know how to make use of it. Some people run around and come back exhausted, because all they’ve done is run errands.” Cannan, meanwhile, encourages caregivers to consider other ways to lighten their load. “They’re going to need all the strength that they can possibly have, for maybe years: We’re not talking days with many of the chronic illness that are out there,” she points out. “If you don’t start early on getting help and taking care of yourself, then you’re going to get too worn out as this progresses down the road.” Cannan, for instance, recently hired someone to clean her house twice a month. “That’s $100 a month in our budget,” she says, “and that’s not necessarily easy, but it’s just made a huge difference knowing that every other week my floors are going to get mopped and my house is going to get cleaned really well. That seems like a small thing, but that’s the kind of thing you have to start doing early on, or else it just starts accumulating and accumulating, and you’re too worn out to even function during the day.”
SyMpathetic liStenerS Over time, notes Donnelly, most caregivers will have to deal with feeling misunderstood and isolated. Austin, who’s been attending one of Donnelly’s support groups for three years, agrees. “If folks are not in that situation, it’s really hard for them to understand. They just don’t quite get it. Matter of fact, at one of the support groups, we were teasing about making T-shirts that said, ‘You just don’t get it: It’s a caregiver thing,’” she adds, laughing. Austin began attending a support group when she realized she wasn’t getting out as much as she used to. She’d stopped working outside the home, and the demands of caregiving were changing, making it harder
“I kept referring to him as the caregiver. And he said, ‘Is that what I am now?’ It was a real transition in his thinking.” — Nancy Hogan, Project C.A.R.E.
for her to manage her daily tasks. “It goes from fixing the meals to feeding the food, from cooking regular meals to fixing puréed food and managing more and more medicines, you know. It just gets more intense.” Besides providing a nonjudgmental listening ear, many group members had been in that situation before and could offer advice. Family members, notes Cannan, can be extremely supportive and helpful — or not. Her own daughter and son-inlaw, she says, have been downplaying the severity of James’ condition, unable to accept his diagnosis. Donnelly says this is common among the families of people in her groups, and it can be extremely frustrating for the primary caregiver. “Frequently you will have visiting family members and friends that come in, haven’t seen the loved one in months, and they will say, ‘He looks great! I think he’s doing great!’ And they go back home and the caregiver’s saying, ‘Well, gosh, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe he’s getting better.’” But as Donnelly points out, people with dementia and similar chronic illnesses don’t get better. “That’s one of the toughest things that caregivers go through; we hear that one all the time,” she reports. Cannan has formed lasting friendships with three of the wives in her support group. “We go out for lunch, and we laugh and we cry and we’re able to share stories,” she reveals. “We can all sit there and cry, and five minutes later we are cracking up laughing because of something really funny one of our husbands did. And it’s just so wonderful: We spend three or four hours together once a month, and it just helps our spirits so much. That’s the kind of thing we’ll keep doing on through our husband’s illnesses, and it will help keep us going.”
Council on Aging of Buncombe County — CAPES (Caring for Aging
Parent Education and Support) Meetings are held the third Monday of each month. Contact Andrea McPeters at AndreaM@coabc.org or call 277-8288 ext. 307.
memory loss, stay in touch with them regularly; call them regularly. They are going to have inertia, they are going to be isolated, they’re not going to know to ask for help. “Don’t believe a caregiver when they say, ‘Oh, we’re fine, thanks,’” she continues. “They are not. They may be doing pretty well now, but heads up: If they start pulling away, if they aren’t coming to church anymore, if they drop out of book club, if they aren’t available to go out to dinner anymore, then stay in touch with them in other ways.” Austin agrees. Reflecting on nearly a decade of experience, she says caregiving is “trying and difficult and stressful … and it is also at times incredibly rewarding.” In addition, she notes, “I was a rowdy teenager, and I owe my parents this.” “Something that everyone in the support groups kind of nods their heads with,” continues Austin, “is when people on the outside of the situation come up and say, ‘Oh, you’re just a saint.’ I’m not doing this to be a saint, and I’m not real comfortable with that. “If you want to make me feel good, instead of telling me how saintly I am, or how inspired you are by how hard I work, come over and spend a couple hours visiting with me, so I can have human contact. Come over and sit with dad so I can go see a movie. I would like to go see a Tourists game. I love the Tourists, and I haven’t been to a game in four years.” X
MemoryCare — MemoryCaregiver
Network groups meet monthly in Fletcher, Arden and Weaverville. Contact Mary Donnelly at network@ memorycare.org for more information.
Alzheimer’s Association of Western North Carolina — Support groups
are held monthly in three Asheville locations for family caregivers dealing with Alzheimer’s or related dementia. 254-7363.
CarePartners – Caregivers Support Group meets the third Wednesday of every month, 3:30-5:30 p.m. Contact Sandy Norbo at 277-3399. CarePartners — Asheville Stroke Support Group meets second Thursdays noon to 1 p.m. For people who’ve had a stroke and their caregivers. Contact Robin Smith 274-9567, ext. 4314. CarePartners — Parkinson’s Support
Group meets the first Tuesday of the month, 10:30 a.m.-noon. Contact Lisa Laney at 277-4886
Jubilee — Caregiver Support Group meets Mondays, 11 a.m.–1 p.m. Contact Mollie Milner at 299-0394.
Memory Loss Caregivers of East Buncombe – Meets second Tuesday,
9:30-11:30 a.m. in Black Mountain. For more information call 230-4142 or 645-9189. To find groups outside of Buncombe County, visit these websites: avl. mx/06n, avl.mx/06o.
Regular Sessions or Residential Retreats
preScription Despite all the help these organizations can offer, some caregivers may still be left feeling underserved, isolated and overwhelmed, says Donnelly, stressing the importance of the informal resources that often go untapped. “That would be friends, families, neighbors, book club members, church members,” she explains. “If you know someone who’s caring for a spouse or a parent who has
where to find help
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maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
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AdvAnced yogA sAdHAnA - vinyAsA krAmA (pd.) Go deeper in your practice. Move beyond just yoga postures, learn the intersection of Yoga and Ayurveda. Sunday, April 6. 10am4pm. Co-Luminate, downtown Asheville. www. Asimplevibrantlife.com brAin inJury AwAreness montH event • SA (3/29), 3pm - Author Deborah Schlag will discuss self care and providing care for the injured. Held at City Lights Bookstore, 3 E. Jackson St., Sylva. Free. Info: citylightsnc.com or 586-9499. council on Aging medicAre clAsses This class discusses how Medicare works. Free. Info and registration: coabc.org or 277-8288. • TH (4/3), 6-8pm - South Buncombe Library, 260 Overlook Road. living HeAltHy witH diAbetes clAss • MONDAYS, 7-9:30pm - Meets at Woodfin YMCA, 40 N. Merrimon Ave, Suite 101. $30. Registration and info: 251-7438. ms wAlk & wellness fAir • SU (3/30), 1pm - Held at Fletcher Park, 85 Howard Gap Road, Fletcher. Info: walknct.nationalmssociety.org. PisgAH legAl AcA service • ONGOING - For information on insurance options under the Affordable Care Act. Free. Registration required. Info: 855-733-3711. red cross blood drives Additional info: redcrosswnc.org. Appointment and ID required for blood drives. • FR (3/28), 7:30am-noon - Reuter Family YMCA, 3 Town Square Boulevard. Appointments and info: 1-800-REDCROSS. • FR (3/28), 8:30am-1pm - Oakley Elementary, 753 Fairview Road. Appointments and info: 1-800-REDCROSS. • SA (3/29), 10am-5pm - WLOS TV Live Well Expo, 1301 Fanning Bridge Road, Fletcher. Appointments and info: 1-800-REDCROSS. • MO (3/31), 2-6pm - Living Savior Lutheran Church, 301 Overlook Road. Appointments and info: 650-0404. side-by-side singing for wellness • WEDNESDAYS, 1-2:30pm - For people with dementia, Alzheimer’s or brain damage and their care-partners. Held in UNCA's Sherrill Center. Free. Info: sidebysidesinging.wordpress.com.
sPirituAl & mentAl HeAltH clAss • SA (3/29), 2pm - "Unstoppable: How to Thrive Mentally, Spiritually and Physically in Uncertain Times." Held at YWCA of Asheville, 185 S. French Broad Ave. Info: email@example.com
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Adult cHildren of AlcoHolics & dysfunctionAl fAmilies ACOA is an anonymous 12-step program for women and men who grew up in alcoholic or otherwise dysfunctional homes. Info: adultchildren. org. • FRIDAYS: • 7pm - Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. • SATURDAYS: • 8:30am - First Baptist Church,
w w w. s t i l l p o i n t w e l l . c o m l 8 2 8 . 3 4 8 . 5 3 7 2
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
312 5th Ave. W., Hendersonville • SUNDAYS: • 3pm - The Servanthood House, 156 E. Chestnut St. • 3pm - Clyde Town Hall, 8437 Carolina Blvd., Clyde • MONDAYS: • 7pm - First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. Al-Anon / AlAteen fAmily grouP A support group for the family and friends of alcoholics. Info: wnc-alanon.org or 800-286-1326. • THURSDAYS: • 7pm - West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Road • 7pm - Pinecrest Presbyterian Church, 1790 Greenville Highway, Flat Rock • 7pm, New Hope Presbyterian Church, 3070 Sweeten Creek Road • FRIDAYS: • noon - Brevard-Davidson River Presbyterian Church, 300 East Main St., Brevard • 1pm - First Baptist Church, 5 Oak St. • 8pm Cathedral of All Souls, 9 Swann St. • SATURDAYS: • 9am & 10am - First Baptist Church Annex, 312 5th Ave. W., Hendersonville • 10am - First Methodist Church, 66 Harrison Ave., Franklin • 10am - Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. • 10am - St. Mary’s Episcopal Church, 337 Charlotte St. • noon - First Baptist Church, 63 N. Main St., Weaverville. • SUNDAYS: • 5pm - West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Road. • MONDAYS: • noon - First Baptist Church, 5 Oak St. • 6pm - Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. • 7:30pm - First United Methodist Church, 77 Jackson St., Sylva • 8pm - Ledger Baptist Church, 208 Church Road, Bakersville. • 8pm - Pinecrest Presbyterian Church, 1790 Greenville Highway, Flat Rock. • TUESDAYS: • 10am - St. Barnabas Catholic Church, 109 Crescent Hill Drive, Arden • 4pm Grace Church, 242 Highway 107 N., Cashiers. • 7pm - First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. • 7:30pm - St. Phillips Episcopal Church, 256 East Main St., Brevard • 8pm - Brevard-Davidson River Presbyterian Church, 249 E. Main St., Brevard. • WEDNESDAYS: • 11:30am - Pardee Education Center at the Blue Ridge Mall, 1800 Four Seasons Blvd., Hendersonville • 5:45pm - (Women's Group) Asbury Memorial United Methodist Church, 171 Beaverdam Road • 7pm - Grace Covenant Presbyterian Church, 798 Merrimon Ave. AsHeville AlcoHolics Anonymous A fellowship of men and women who share their experiences to help each other recover from alcoholism. Info: ashevilleaa.org. • ONGOING - Visit their website or mountainx. com/events for a full list of meetings in the WNC area. debtors Anonymous 12-step recovery on issues of underearning, debt and learning to live one's vision in life. Info: debtorsanonymous.org. • MONDAYS, 7pm - First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St., Room 101. dePression And biPolAr suPPort AlliAnce • WEDNESDAYS, 7-9pm & SATURDAYS, 4-6pm - Meets at 1316-C Parkwood Road. Free. Info: MagneticMinds.weebly.com or 367-7660. emotions Anonymous: AsHeville • TUESDAYS, 7pm - A 12-step program for anyone desiring to live a healthier emotional life. Held at Oak Forest Presbyterian Church, 880 Sandhill Road. Info: 631-434-5294.
HeArt of recovery meditAtion grouP • TUESDAYS, 6pm - Integrates meditation practice with any 12-step recovery program. Held at Shambhala Meditation Center, 19 Westwood Place. Info: asheville.shambhala.org. HeArt suPPort grouP • 1st TUESDAYS, 2-4pm - Session for individuals living with heart failure. Asheville Cardiology Associates, 5 Vanderbilt Drive. Info: 274-6000. memorycAregivers network Support for caregivers of loved ones who suffer from dementia and Alzheimer's. Info: 645-9189 or 230-4143. • 1st TUESDAYS, 1pm - Meets at Fletcher Seventh-Day Adventist Church, 1141 Howard Gap Road, Fletcher. men working on life issues grouP • TUESDAYS, 6-8pm - Meets at 90 Zillicoa Ave. Info: 686-5590 or 683-7195. mission HeAltH fAmily grouP nigHt • 4th THURSDAYS, 5:30pm - For caregivers of children with special health care needs and developmental concerns. Held at Transylvania Parks & Recreation, 1078 Ecusta Road, Brevard. mission HeAltH fAmily grouP nigHt • 1st TUESDAYS, 5:30pm - For caregivers of children with special health care needs and developmental concerns. Mission Rueter Children’s Center, 11 Vanderbilt Park Drive. Info: 213-9787. nAr-Anon fAmily grouPs A group for relatives and friends who are concerned about the addiction or drug problem of another. Info: nar-anon.org. • WEDNESDAYS, 12:30pm - First United Methodist Church, 204 6th Ave. W., Hendersonville. Info: 891-8050. • TUESDAYS, 7pm - West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Road. nArcotics Anonymous of wnc NA provides support to men and women for whom drugs had become a major problem. Local helpline: 866-925-2148. Info: wncna.org. • ONGOING - Visit their website or mountainx. com/events for a full list of meetings in the WNC area. nAtionAl AlliAnce on mentAl illness NAMI offers support to people living with mental health issues and their families, friends and loved ones. Located at 356 Biltmore Ave., Suite. 207. Info: namiwnc.org or 505-7353. • THURSDAYS, 2pm - Dual Diagnosis Group at the Central United Methodist Church, 27 Church St. overeAters Anonymous A fellowship of individuals who are recovering from compulsive overeating. A 12-step program. • THURSDAYS: • noon - Biltmore United Methodist Church, 376 Hendersonville Road. Info: 277-1975 • 6:30pm - Cox House, 723 N. Grove St., Hendersonville. Info: 329-1637. • FRIDAYS: • 10am- Biltmore United Methodist Church, 376 Hendersonville Road. Info: 277-1975. • SATURDAYS: • 9:30am - 424 W. State St., Black Mountain. Info: 669-0986. • MONDAYS: • 6pm - First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. Info: 516-650-5626. • 6:30pm Balfour United Methodist Church, 2567 Asheville Highway, Hendersonville. Info: 800-580-4761. • TUESDAYS, 10:30am - Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. Info: 609-731-0808. • 5:30pm
• SUNDAYS, 7pm - Crossroads Recovery Center, 440 East Court St., Marion. Info: 9258626
- First Presbyterian Church, 46 Presbyterian Drive, Sylva. Info: 508-2586. ProstAte cAncer suPPort • TU (4/1), 7pm - For men, caregivers and families. Held at American Cancer Society office , 120 Executive Park. Free. Info: 3380290.
sylvA grief suPPort grouP • FRIDAY, 1-2:30pm - Hosted by Four Seasons Compassion for Life. Held at First Baptist Church, 669 W. Main St., Sylva. Info: mlee@ fourseasonscfl.org.
recovering couPles Anonymous Support group for couples where at least one member is recovering from addiction. Info: recovering-couples.org. • MONDAYS, 6pm - Foster Seventh Day Adventist Church, 375 Hendersonville Road, room 402. Info: crimsonmanzanita@yahoo. com.
t.H.e. center for disordered eAting 297 Haywood St. Info: thecenternc.org or 337-4685. • WEDNESDAYS, 7-8pm - Eating disorders adult support group, led by licensed therapists and dietitians.
recovery from food Addiction • FRIDAYS, 7pm - Meets at Biltmore United Methodist Church, 376 Hendersonville Road. Info: 423-6191 or 407-8654.
• 1st THURSDAYS, 7pm - For electrosensitive individuals. Location and info: 255-3350 or
more wellness events online Check out the Wellness Calendar online at www.mountainx.com/events for info on events happening after April 3. cAlendAr deAdline
SATURDAY, MARCH 29TH, 2014 EXPO: 10:00 AM – 2:00 PM
Tastings, samples, coupons, cooking demos, local restaurants and bakeries, plus information for your
The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m. wednesdAy, one week prior to publication. Questions? Call (828)251-1333, ext. 365
Gluten-Free Expo & Information Fair
smArt recovery A peer support group to help individuals gain independence from all types of addictive behavior (drugs, alcohol, gambling, sex, etc.). • THURSDAYS, 6pm - Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. Info: 407-0460.
Leah McGrath,RD, LDN Corporate Dietitian, Ingles Markets Follow me on Twitter: www.twitter.com/InglesDietitian Work Phone: 800-334-4936
wireless devices sensitivity suPPort grouP
s-Anon fAmily grouPs • ONGOING - An anonymous 12-step program for those affected by another's sexaholism. Four meetings available weekly in WNC. Days, times, locations and additional info: firstname.lastname@example.org or 258-5117.
Eating Right for Good Health
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Demo Day April 3, 11 am - 3 pm • Skin Care with expert advice from MyChelle Dermaceuticals, Acure Organics • Anti-Aging products of Pharmaceutical quality and strengths • Menopausal issues with expert advice from Pharmacists • Make-up Artist for Gabriel Cosmetics • Body work by Mark Ritzenthaler
The Next Frontier for the GF Community” Beth Hillson - President American Celiac Disease Alliance, Cookbook Author • 11:45 am “How to Makeover your Favorite Recipes to Gluten-Free” 1:00 pm – Panel Discussion Sherrill Center, Kimmel Arena 227 Campus Drive, UNC-A Campus, Asheville NC $5 Entry (12 & over; $20 maximum for families) For more information: www.ashevillegig.org or www.ingles-markets.com/ask_leah Sponsored By: Gluten Intolerance Group of Asheville Hendersonville Celiac Support Group Ingles Supermarkets
752 Biltmore Avenue • 828-251-0094 www.naturespharmacy.biz mountainx.com
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
F A R M
G A R D E N
Best in Show
Your donation supports the nonprofit services of Four Seasons CFL At the Western North Carolina Orchid Society’s 2014 Orchid Show judges will compare the standout orchids with all known orchids across the country. Photo courtesy of Western North Carolina Orchid Society
WNC Orchid Society showcases world-class blooms
by jen natHan oRRis Send your garden news to email@example.com
Like a prized Pekingese waiting in the wings, glamorous orchids are being primped and groomed for the Western North Carolina Orchid Society’s 2014 Orchid Show, scheduled for Saturday, March 29, and Sunday, March 30, at the N.C. Arboretum. The orchid society’s president and show chairman graham Ramsey compares it to gearing up for the “Best in Show” award at a prestigious dog show. But instead of canines, the stars will be vibrant orchids that range in size from a tiny pea to a hefty grapefruit.
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
All of the show’s orchids will compete with one another, but when the judges see something that sparks their interest, the plant could be eligible for national competition. This is an American Orchid Society-sanctioned event, which means the judges will compare the standout orchids with all known orchids across the country. WNC Orchid Society members have won coveted ribbons in the past and hope to have similar success this year. The annual event is more than a chance for accomplished horticulturalists to show off their blooms. “The public is going to be absolutely amazed when they walk in because the first thing they’ll see is thousands of blooming orchids,” says Ramsey. This year’s theme is Trails of Orchids, a nod to the sense of discovery that comes with wandering through rows of colorful blooms. Previous shows have brought in nearly 5,000 visitors, according to the society. Ramsey estimates that about half of the visitors come
shop. plant. feast! from WNC and the rest travel from around the Southeast and sometimes even farther. Avid collectors and anyone interested in trying the hobby can pick up a wide array of orchids at the show’s accompanying sale. Nine vendors, including some worldclass breeders, will be selling plants. Educators will be on hand to teach programs on topics like repotting and other techniques. The public can join WNC Orchid Society Vice President marc burchette for a guided walk through the show on Saturday and Sunday at 11 a.m. If you’ve seen one too many sad, bloomless orchids on office windowsills, don’t assume that you can’t grow orchids yourself. Ramsey notes that there are more than 40 species of native North Carolina orchids, some of which could be poking their heads out of your backyard right now. Orchids grow on every continent on Earth (except Antarctica), so if they can survive in central Africa or northern Russia, it’s possible for even a brown thumb to grow them here. The WNC Orchid Society offers support and camaraderie for everyone from “beginner 101 windowsillers,” as Ramsey describes them, all the way up to expert propagators. Meetings harken back to grade school show-and-tell sessions with a mix of educational presentations and live orchids on display. The society welcomes anyone with a touch of curiosity or full-blown orchid obsession to join the group. The Western North Carolina Orchid Society 2014 Orchid Show will be held Saturday, March 29, and Sunday, March 30 at the N.C. Arboretum. Free to attend; $12 Arboretum parking fee. wncos.org X
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seed stArting/PlAnt ProPAgAtion clAss • SA (3/29), 1pm - Held at the Pearson Community Garden, 408 Pearson Drive. Suggested donation: $15-35. Info: firstname.lastname@example.org. sylvA gArden club • TU (4/1), 10am - With yard lighting discussion. Held at First Presbyterian Church, 46 Presbyterian Drive, Sylva. Info: pollybdavis@ yahoo.com. tAilgAte mArkets • TUESDAYS: • 2:30-5:30pm - Barnardsville Farmers Market, held at Nature’s Corner Country Store, 1599 Barnardsville Highway. • SATURDAYS: • 9am-noon - Jackson County Markets Market, 23 Central St., in the Community Table. Through March. • DAILY: • 8am-5pm - WNC Farmers Market, 570 Brevard Road. Year-round. western nortH cArolinA orcHid society sHow • SA (3/29) & SU (3/30), 10am-5pm - Held at the N.C. Arboretum. Free to attend. Arboretum parking fees apply. Info: wncos.org.
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maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
F O O D
All Greek to me A sampling of Asheville’s Hellenic food history
by toni sHeRwood
Some of Asheville’s best but least expensive eateries have a history steeped in Greek flavors. Name a longtime diner or recall one that’s no longer around, and it’s quite likely it was owned and run by Greeks immigrants to the area. Athens Restaurant and Three Brothers comes to mind, though both are gone. But (to name just a few that still rank high as local favorites), there’s The Mediterranean, Apollo Flame Bistro and Five Points. “The Greeks were in the restaurant business, so that’s where you worked,” says Pete Apostolopoulos, owner of The Mediterranean Restaurant in the heart of downtown Asheville. Well-known for his sense of humor as much as for his food, he jokes, “Who else would let you work 16 or 17 hours a day even if you spoke no English?” Apostolopoulos was a high school senior in Greece when the U.S. Peace Corps brought generators and other modern conveniences to his small, mountain community. “They were telling us about America and I thought, ‘What am I doing here?’” he recalls. So in 1967, Apostolopoulos arrived in New York on a boat named the Queen Anna Maria. He immediately took a train to Spartanburg, S.C. and made his way to Asheville, where his uncle owned Athens Restaurant on Merrimon Avenue. By 1975, Apostolopoulos became the owner of what locals fondly call “The Med.” John and Susan Poulos, meanwhile, have been in the restaurant business here for 40 years, and at the Apollo Flame Restaurant location on Hendersonville Road for 25 years (the Brevard Road location is owned by his cousins — of course).
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
When he was 13, John emigrated from Greece with his parents and sister. “In Greece, at 13 you’re done with school,” John explains. “You come to the U.S., you kiss the ground. We didn’t even have shoes.” He started out washing dishes at his uncle’s Happy Hill Restaurant on Patton Avenue. “We worked the first day we came here,” John recalls. In 1988 John opened Apollo Flame, a Greek-Italian Restaurant where he uses his grandfather’s recipes, which have been passed down for three generations. John worked side-byside with his late father for 40 years. He met his wife, Susan, in 1990 when she was working at a bank. “He brought me to the restaurant a year before we got married to be sure I could do it,” Susan jokes. The couple have no children, so they’ve taken their employees under their wing. Susan admits, “It’s hard to find a group of people who can work together and who you can trust.” So when they find them, they hang on to them, she says.
fRom gReece witH Love: (left) Pete Apostolopoulos, pictured with his wife, Paula, remembers tasting Coca-Cola for the first time when he came to the U.S. at age 18 (inset photo at right, with friend Chris Leris).
Each morning the staff gathers for elaborate breakfasts — often cooked by John before work begins. A huge mural, filling an entire wall of the restaurant, depicts not only close relatives but also employees, many having worked with the family for 15 or 20 years. A relative newcomer to Asheville, Ilias “Louie” Sellas joined Tommy Triantafilou as a partner in Five Points Restaurant on Broadway Ave. about seven months ago. “I love cooking,” Sellas says. He credits the Triantafilou family for the suc-
cess of this popular diner and was thrilled to join their team. Sellas left his home country at age 15, and says, “There was no place to survive in Greece.” In 1975, he visited his brother in New York and started working as a dishwasher at a restaurant there. By 1982 he had bought the place, and his son still runs it. Sellas discovered Asheville when he came down to help out at his cousin’s restaurant in Hendersonville. Like many successful restaurateurs, in a business with long hours and lots of competition he makes a point of interacting with customers. “Customers want to see you here,” Sellas says, greeting everyone who walks in the door even during the interview. Susan Poulos agrees. “They like it that the owners are here and they like to see you working. Some [customers] have known John for 30 years now.” Apostolopoulos says the feeling is mutual: “My customers become my friends.”
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aLL in tHe famiLy: John and Susan Poulos, left, and Louie Sellas, right, dish
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up Greek flavors for the Apollo Flame and Five Points restaurants, respectively. Both John and Louie left their native Greece in their early teens. Photos by Alicia Funderburk
But their children may not follow in their footsteps. Apostolopoulos says he isn’t sure who will eventually take over his restaurant: One daughter aspires to be a pharmacist and the other is working at an architectural firm in Chicago. But he has no definite retirement plans. He’s up at 4 a.m. every day and at the restaurant by 5 a.m. Although both of Sellas’ grown sons are in the restaurant business, he says, “I’m addicted to this business. I don’t see myself retiring. I don’t even think about retiring.” Since joining the Five Points team, Sellas has added some Greek specialties to the menu: moussaka, pastitsio, spanokopita, and a daily special, such as stuffed cabbage. An experienced cook, Sellas took what worked over the years and made his own recipes. Other secrets to these restaurateurs’ success? Sellas says, “We pay loyal customers back with good quality food at reasonable prices.” On Saturday mornings Apostolopoulos always whips up biscuits and gravy from scratch, a longtime customer favorite. “These days you’re not getting rich with restaurants,” Apostolopoulos says. “You’re just making a living.” Rather than aiming for higher profits, these restaurateurs value
their customers and want to be accessible to people of all income levels — so they keep the prices low. “We sell a main dish for what others sell appetizers,” John says. “And we have the same prices for lunch and dinner,” Susan adds. “People say to me, ‘how can you sell a spinach pie and Greek salad for $7.95?’” Sellas says. “But we’re not here to get rich, we want to make a living and keep the customers happy.” By far, the biggest common denominator with Greek restaurateurs is their love of America. “It’s a beautiful country, and I love it to death,” Sellas says. “Asheville’s been good to me,” Poulos says, “This is home.” Apostolopoulos agrees, “I live the American dream, I came from nothing. I’m glad to be here.” five Points Restaurant, 258 Broadway, 252-8030 urbanspoon. com/r/82/802204/restaurant/FivePoints/5-Points-Restaurant-Asheville the mediterranean Restaurant, 57 College St., 258-0476 facebook.com/ MediterraneanRestaurantAsheville apollo flame bistro, 485 Hendersonville Road, 274-3582; and 1025 Brevard Road, 665-0080, apolloflamebistro.net X
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maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
by Elizabeth Reynolds McGuire
The fika files: The art of community Eagle Street Coffee Emporium moves to a neighborhood on the rise
Look down Eagle Street from Biltmore Avenue, and you’ll see the historic YMI Cultural Center and on the corner, a little coffee shop. Eagle Street Coffee Emporium moved into the neighborhood last November, pulling up roots from its Wall Street location to join a neighborhood with a rich, African-American history. Owner Teresa Johnson says her mission is to provide a “safe space, where everyone is welcome” and that she hopes the coffee shop will become an integral part of a community on the rise. And nearby, shops like Stefanie’s Design Studio, a hair salon and spa, and restaurants like Limones and Noble Kava, a unique bar featuring herbal drinks from the South Pacific, have made The Block — as the neighborhood is often called — home. New projects are underway, too: About a block from the Coffee Emporium, a multimillion-dollar, mixed-use development includes renovating old buildings and adding new structures that will house 62 low-income housing units, as well as retail, commercial and community space. The project will make use of the Del Cardo,
Local prioritization processes have been completed and open to the public for inspection and comments. Additional information available: By visiting www.fbrmpo.org or www.landofskyrpo.org, or By Email: email@example.com or firstname.lastname@example.org It is the policy of the French Brood River MPO to ensure thai no person shall, on the ground of race, color, sex, age, national origin, or disabilily, be excluded from participation in, be denied the benefits of, or be otherwise subjected to discrimination under any program or activity as provided by Tille VI of the Civil RightsAct of 1964 and other Civil Rights laws and authorities.
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Ritz and Dr. Collette buildings. It is, said then-Mayor Terry Bellamy in 2012, a dream that’s “almost 20 years in the making.” The synergy of past and future makes The Block just the right place for Johnson and the Coffee Emporium. As a lover of art, she promotes the creation of art, decorating the shop shelves and walls with local paintings, drawings and crafts. Vintage, secondhand furniture and paintings by children and youths hanging on the walls make the space feel like home. It is a comfortable gathering place for all ages, from teenagers seeking a peaceful place to study, to businessmen and women looking for a quick break in their day, to friends and colleagues having conversation over coffee. Johnson invites conversation, too, providing a place for support groups to meet. And she dreams of acquiring the space next door and using it as a weekend music venue. The emporium is a cozy, intimate place for people to gather, not only for coffee, but also to engage in creating community. Johnson remarks that she is “open to being part of the community, hoping that the coffee shop will draw more people down to the area,” especially as The Block undergoes a longawaited round of revitalization. a Legacy Founded in 1893, the YMI Cultural Center has a long tradition of welcoming people, providing support and improving the lives of those who live and work in the Eagle-Market streets neighborhood. George Vanderbilt, who built the Biltmore Estate, funded the construction of the Young Men’s Institute building — initially for the young African-American men working on the estate who lived in the Eagle-Market street area. The center provided a night school for adults, a Sunday school, a school for children, a bathhouse and a library. It also housed a drugstore, doctor’s office, working rooms, sleeping rooms and a swimming pool. In 1905, the YMI board of directors raised enough money to
syneRgy: Eagle Street Coffee Emporium owner Teresa Johnson, right, says she hopes her business will become an integral part of a community on the rise. EMSDC’s Stephanie Swepon-Twitty, left, says a primary goal for The Block is to preserve the past and prosper in the future. Photos by Toni Sherwood
buy the building so that, throughout the years, it could continue to be an integral part of Asheville’s AfricanAmerican community. These days, the historic building remains a place used for events, exhibitions and meetings. It has become a center for multicultural collaboration serving all of Asheville. Among this rich, diverse and inspiring history, Eagle Street Coffee Emporium has found its new home, says Johnson, who signed a longterm lease. Looking foRwaRd In the mid-1970s, “urban renewal” swept through the Eagle-Market streets neighborhood neighborhood. About 70 homes and businesses were destroyed, devastating the community. According to Stephanie SwepsonTwitty, CEO of Eagle Market Streets Development Corp. since 2008, families were torn apart and many were left homeless. It became a community in need. And over the years, many buildings have remained vacant, despite ongoing efforts to revitalize The Block. Meanwhile, the Eagle Market Streets Development Corp. was founded in 1994, under the leadership of Dr. John H. Grant and the patronage of Mount Zion Missionary Baptist Church. The goal: Turn things around. The nonprofit’s mission has remained focused on developing
people, property and businesses, as well as promoting economic and social justice for all. In 2010, the EMSDC forged a new partnership with Mountain Housing Opportunities. It was “the most productive relationship that The Eagle Market Streets Development Corp. had ever forged … a divinely inspired partnership,” says Swepson-Twitty. In 2012, the city of Asheville gave the go-ahead for the Del Cardo project, and after raising nearly $12 million from public, private and not-for-profit sources, the EMSDC and MHO broke ground, estimating that the housing component will be near completion by December 2014 and the commercial spaces in 2015. Businesses already lined up for the space include Visit and Venture, The Support Center and the new Eagle Market Streets Development Corp. offices. The desire is to both preserve the past and prosper in the future, says Swepson-Twitty. Johnson hopes that Eagle Street Coffee Emporium will be a welcoming place in the community. She remarks, “I have already felt welcomed and become a part” of this historical area. Johnson says that she is honored to watch and participate in the renewal of such a diverse and inspiring part of Asheville’s history. X
by Toni Sherwood
The gluten-free life This Saturday, UNC Asheville’s Sherrill Center will be transformed into a state-of-the-art gluten-free education center with 55 vendors offering tastings, cooking demos and the latest information. Organizers hope the Gluten-Free Expo will help dispel some of the popular myths surrounding why people choose the diet. The media’s portrayal of glutenfree as just another fad diet has proliferated misinformation, says Ingles Dietitian Leah McGrath. “I’ve worked with people suffering from celiac disease for eight to 10 years now,” McGrath says. “They suffered a long time before being diagnosed.” Sheila Horine, branch manager of the Gluten Intolerance Group of Asheville, finds the persistence of this uninformed attitude disheartening. “For people with celiac disease, the gluten-free diet is their medicine,” Horine explains. “Celiac disease means the body is not absorbing the nutrition it needs.” All of Horine’s children (three daughters) were diagnosed with celiac disease a decade ago. “There’s a lot of outdated information on the Internet,” Horine says. “At the expo we work with the latest actual scientific information out there.” Posana Café Executive Chef Peter Pollay, who is also president of Asheville Independent Restaurants, says that when his wife, Martha, was diagnosed with celiac disease seven years ago, it was his first knowledge of the disease. Now Pollay’s restaurant is the only 100-percent gluten-free restaurant in Asheville. “For the first three years we were open, we didn’t mention it,” Pollay says. “People eating at the restaurant didn’t even notice.” Although Pollay says he has observed more people choosing to eat gluten-free, those with celiac disease have zero tolerance. Horine says cross-contamination can result from a minuscule amount of gluten. “Last summer, the Food and Drug Administration defined gluten-free products; they need to contain less than 20 parts per million,” Horine says. “That’s less than a crumb.”
Expo aims to share information, dispel myths
HeLP is on tHe way: The March 29 Gluen-Free Expo at UNCA will help dispel some of the myths surrounding why people choose the diet, say organizers. From left, Laurie Steenwyk, Rick Donahue, Sheil Horine and Andrea Britt. Photo by Alicia Funderburk
Pollay knows that restaurants try hard to offer gluten-free options, but gluten can hide in many places. “If you deep-fry a breaded onion ring in oil, the oil is contaminated,” Pollay says. “It can be spread with tongs, hands, bowls.” Ingles Markets will sponsor the expo, along with the Hendersonville Celiac Support Group, but all proceeds will go toward the nonprofit Gluten Intolerance Group of Asheville. McGrath, who assists with vendors and logistics, says this year’s layout will reflect a day in a gluten-free life. Attendees will be guided through displays of breakfast foods, snacks and lunch items, rounding it out with dinner entrees. There will even be gluten-free beer and cider, and sweet treats like Jelly Belly candies and gluten-free cookies. Speakers include Rachel Begun, a nutrition expert, consultant and blogger, who will talk at 10:15 a.m.
on “Preventing Cross Contact: The Next Frontier in the GF Community.” Beth Hillson, president of the American Celiac Disease Alliance and cookbook author, will speak at 11:45 a.m. on “How to Make Over Your Favorite Recipes to GlutenFree.” A panel discussion follows at 1 p.m. Horine offers a bit of advice before people start on a glutenfree diet: get tested for gluten intolerance first. “The test doesn’t work unless you are eating gluten,” Horine says. Gluten-Free Expo, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. March 29, UNCA’s Sherrill Center/ Kimmel Arena, 227 Campus Drive. Entry fee: $5 for ages 12 and older ($20 maximum per family). Details: ashevillegig.org, ingles-markets. com/dietitian/leah/asheville-glutenfree-expo X
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by Gina Smith and Tanner Hall
email@example.com and firstname.lastname@example.org
Small bites feRmentation on wHeeLs Traveling food-preservation-education project Fermentation on Wheels will bring its mobile classroom and fermentation lab — a converted 1986 International Harvester school bus — to Asheville for a donation-based food starter-culture exchange, workshop and community potluck the weekend of April 5-6. The visit is one stop on a joint tour with the nonprofit Fermenters Club that will end in midApril in Nasheville, Tenn. The tour’s events, says Fermentation on Wheels founder Tara Whitsitt, are meant to “serve as a way to bridge communities and restore a genuine fascination and interest in local, traditionally preserved foods.” Whitsitt created her mobile workshop in 2013 in Eugene, Ore. and has since traveled the country presenting vegetable-ferment classes.
any order of $25 or more
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801 Fairview Road • Asheville 28803 (In the Bi-Lo shopping center)
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Both Fermentation on Wheels and Fermenters Club aim to teach and encourage people to make and share their own living, probiotic foods. A fermentation workshop will be held at 2:30 p.m. Saturday, April 5, and a fermented-foods potluck will be held 4-8 p.m. Sunday, April 6, both at Green Hill Urban Farm, 30 Green Hill Ave., Asheville. RSVP: email@example.com. More details: fermentersclub.com, fermentationonwheels.com or greenhillurbanfarm.com. — Gina Smith dean oRnisH dinneR event Mountain Area Health Education Center (MAHEC) will host Dr. Dean Ornish at 6 p.m. Thursday, March 27, at Asheville Community Theatre for an event centered on educating the community about food, chronic disease and aging. Ornish, a best-selling author and a clinical professor of medicine at the University of California, will discuss sustainable nutritional practices that are good for the health of both humans and the planet. The event will also serve as an introduction to the professional catering world for Dava Melton, founder of Blessed 2 Cook, who will provide a locally sourced, smallplate menu designed to correspond with Ornish’s lecture. Ornish’s lecture is part of the Integrative Health Conference held by MAHEC and will be followed by a book signing. Tickets are $45. Meal begins at 6 p.m., lecture begins at 7:15 p.m. Thursday, March 27, at Asheville Community Theatre, 35 E. Walnut. Tickets:tinyurl.com/ OrnishEvening. — Tanner Hall new teRRitoRy foR fRencH bRoad cHocoLate Lounge
Food news to go
French Broad Chocolate Lounge recently announced plans to move from its bursting-at-the-seams original location at 10 S. Lexington Ave., where it has been for most of its six years in business. Lounge owners Dan and Jael Rattigan have signed a 10-year lease on the first floor of the historic Legal Building, previously Sun Trust Bank, at 10 S. Pack Square and are beginning renovations on the space this spring. Plans for the new location include scratch-made ice creams,
get on tHe bus: Tara Whitsitt, founder of Fermentation on Wheels, will bring her mobile cultured-food education project to Asheville in April. Photo courtesy of Tara Whitsitt
a separate retail space for takeout items, greater seating capacity (including outdoor seating on Pack Square) and an expanded chocolate selection. frenchbroadchocolate.com — Gina Smith
will receive a copy of the restaurant’s new cookbook, Tupelo Honey Cafe: New Southern Flavors From The Blue Ridge Mountains. The first 100 customers will receive a free pint glass. Info: tupelohoneycafe.com — Gina Smith
tuPeLo Honey keePs gRowing
faRmeR and cHef asHeviLLe cookbook
With Tupelo Honey Café’s $330,000 renovation project on its downtown location slated to be completed this week, the restaurant has also announced plans to expand into the Atlanta market. Tupelo Honey’s first Georgia location, scheduled to open sometime in 2015, will be part of a 21-acre, mixed-use development being constructed in Sandy Springs, just north of Atlanta. The restaurant already has five other out-of-market locations in Charlotte, N.C., Greenville, S.C. and Knoxville, Chattanooga and Johnson City, Tenn., in addition to its two original Asheville stores. The revamped College Street restaurant will reopen at 9 a.m. Friday, March 28, and an open house will be held to celebrate the upgrades 3-5 p.m. the same day. Free appetizers will be offered, and the first 25 customers
Farmer and Chef South, a media resource on Southern food trends, has a cookbook in in the works for late 2014 that will focus on Asheville’s food culture. According to Christine Sykes Lowe of Farmer and Chef, the cookbook will feature “farmers who preserve Appalachian mountain heritage and the chefs who make the city of Asheville a ‘Foodtopia’ destination, as branded by the Asheville Convention and Visitors Bureau.” The Asheville cookbook project is Farmer and Chef South’s first in a planned series of publications aimed at spotlighting Southern cities with thriving food communities. Farmer and Chef also hosts quarterly events focused on food, drinks and sustainability, among other activities. farmerandchefsouth.com — Gina Smith X
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Send your beer news to firstname.lastname@example.org or @avlbeerscout on Twitter
by Thom O’Hearn
Highland turns 20 Asheville’s oldest brewery celebrates
ent a four-mile nighttime race ending with pints at the brewery, served in glowing glasses (for more information or to register, visit highlandbrewing.com).
Raise a glass to the father of Asheville craft beer. When Highland Brewing Co. opened in 1994, North Carolina had all of 10 breweries; now there are more than 100. And when Gov. Pat McCrory signed the proclamation for North Carolina Beer Month, which begins April 1, we’d just cracked the list of the top 10 states for craft breweries. “When Highland started, we just wanted to be the hometown brewery — you know, like the European model, where you walk into town and go to the brewery,” says Highland’s vice president, Leah Wong Ashburn, the daughter of founder Oscar Wong. “But Asheville reacted so well to us and to our beer. We’ve been growing every year, and now here we are at our 20th anniversary this April!”
exPanding in asHeviLLe
20/20 vision: Leah Wong Ashburn, daughter of Highland Brewery founder Oscar Wong, shows off Highland’s new packaging, which is hitting the stores now for the company’s 20th anniversary. Highland will also celebrate by offering 20 special beers, including brand-new recipes by Highland brewers. Photo by Alicia Funderburk
staRting witH quaLity Back in 1994, nobody knew what to expect from Asheville’s first brewery. If Highland hadn’t delivered very good beer, it wouldn’t have survived — much less paved the way for today’s thriving beer culture. Oscar Wong understood that. “My dad was committed to making highquality beer before we even opened,” says Ashburn. “We actually dumped our first three batches before we served a single beer in Asheville.” To this day, beer drinkers throughout the Southeast know exactly what they’re getting when they order a Gaelic or an Oatmeal Porter. Yet according to Ashburn, the company’s solid reputation has led to something unexpected: Its seasonal beers are now Highland’s No. 2 seller, after Gaelic. “Our customers drive what we make,” she explains. “Their demand for beers like Little Hump and Thunderstruck has grown so fast, we’re now doing five seasonals a year, even though there are only four seasons.” Over the years, Highland has released many iconic beers — rare sours, one-off imperial ales and, of
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course, the many editions of Cold Mountain. So as part of the 20th anniversary celebration, the company plans to highlight creativity past and present with 20 beers for 20 years. “Three beers will be collaborations with Asheville’s three other [longtime] breweries [French Broad, Green Man and Wedge], and we’ll brew 10 we’ve brewed before,” notes Ashburn. “But every one of our brewers will also design and release a brand-new recipe.” The first four brews, including the signature 20th Anniversary Scotch Ale, will be available at a big blowout Saturday, April 19, from 2-9 p.m. The “Plaid Party,” says Ashburn, will be a supersize version of its 15th anniversary bash: great live music, delicious beer you can’t get anywhere else and a party that lasts all day. giving back Quality aside, Ashburn also credits her father with building a company culture that makes giving back to the community a high priority.
Every seasonal beer gets a release party at the brewery that benefits the Southern Appalachian Highlands Conservancy. But this year, Highland is taking things to the next level, hosting the nonprofit’s 40th anniversary party at the brewery Thursday, May 15, with a special Elevation Ale brewed just for the event. Highland also partners with the local Adopt-A-Stream program and MANNA FoodBank while offering support to countless local nonprofits both in and outside the tasting room. “Our hope is that we’ll remain a real sense of pride for Asheville no matter how far we distribute, not only for our beer but for how we operate — how we fit into the bigger picture,” Ashburn explains. To that end, the company is hosting Night Flight, its first charity race, as part of the 20th anniversary festivities. On Saturday, July 12, Highland will partner with the city of Asheville and the Asheville Parks & Greenways Foundation to pres-
Beyond the celebrations, there’s another reason 2014 is a big year for Highland: If all goes as planned, the company will be breaking ground on a $6.5 million expansion. The main goal will be to double annual capacity from about 32,000 to 64,000 barrels. But it will also mean more jobs at its Old Charlotte Highway location, notes Ashburn. In addition, the brewery plans to continue improving the taproom and meadow, a popular East Asheville hangout. “The kids might be sorry to hear it, but the meadow has already been graded and sodded for this spring and summer, so no big mud puddles this year,” she reports. “Seriously, though, we love that we have great beer and live music, but it’s so family-friendly. We like that everyone can come here and feel comfortable. We want to build on that, to always be a place people love. We still want to be a hometown brewery.” X
wednesdAy: AltAmont: Live Music: Songwriter night w/ Dave Desmelik, 8pm AsHeville brewing comPAny: All pints $3 at Coxe location; Bottle Release: Perfect Day IPA frencH broAd: $7 growler fills HigHlAnd: Live Music: Dan Shearin (acoustic), 5:30-7:30pm Hi-wire: Sideshow Wednesday small-batch release lAb: $3 pint night oskAr blues: Wednesday night bike ride, 6pm oyster House: $2 off growler fills
Some companieS have brancheS, we have rootS! wedge: Food Truck: Cecila’s Culinary Tour; Recent Release: French Farm House Ale w/ Brettanyomyces tHursdAy: AsHeville brewing comPAny: All pints $3 at Merrimon location frencH broAd: Live Music: Peggy Ratusz (blues, jazz), 6-8pm lAb: Live Music: The Friendly Beasts w/ Stuart Ross Johnson (indie, ambient, alternative), 9pm oskAr blues: Live Music: Angela Easterling (Americana, folk), 6pm PisgAH: Live Music: The Alchemystics w/ Bruckshot (reggae, roots rock), 9pm wedge: Food Truck: Tin Can Pizzeria fridAy:
recent seller...“I was Executor of my Uncle’s property which was over an hour away from where I
HigHlAnd: Live Music: Bayou Diesel (Cajun, zydeco), 6-8pm Hi-wire: Food: English breakfast & soccer, 11am-1pm; Slow Smokin’ Barbeque, 4-11pm oskAr blues: Live Music: The Stump Mutts (alt-rock), 7pm; Food Truck: 3 Suns Bistro
wedge: Food Truck: El Kimchi sundAy: Hi-wire: Live Music: William Schmitt (folk), 5-7pm lAb: $10 pitchers
frencH broAd: Live Music: The Moon & You (indie, folk), 6-8pm
wedge: Food Truck: Cecilia’s Culinary Tour
Pisgah Inn Opening for the 2014 Season Tuesday April 1st at 5pm
mondAy: AltAmont: Old-time jam
oskAr blues: New Release: Mama’s Gone Wild collaBEERation w/ South Yeast Labs; Live Music: Nomadic (electronic funk), 7pm; Firkin Friday: Jazz Hands Deviant (Deviant Dale’s brewed with jasmine); Food Truck: 3 Suns Bistro, 4-8pm
AsHeville brewing comPAny: Firkin: Backstage Betty w/ Czech Saaz hops
PisgAH: Live Music: Dave Zoll Trio (rock, jam), 8pm
oyster House: $3 pint night
soutHern APPAlAcHiAn brewery: Live Music: Grits & Soul (Americana), 8-10pm
wicked weed: $8 stein refills
wedge: Food Truck: Cecilia’s Culinary Tour
call me, you’ll like mike! 828-712-9052 email@example.com
soutHern APPAlAcHiAn brewery: Appalachian Fire (bluegrass), 8-10pm
soutHern APPAlAcHiAn brewery: Live Music: Garry Segal (blues jam), 5-7pm
Hi-wire: Food: Slow Smokin’ Barbeque, 4-11pm
mike miller, reaLtor® asheville native
PisgAH: Live Music: Raising Caine (alt-country, Americana), 8pm; Food: DOGS
AltAmont: Live Music: Jeff Sipe Trio (funk, jam, jazz), 9pm
HigHlAnd: Live Music: The Lazy Birds (Americana), 6-8pm
lived. I was expecting to be running back and forth to oversee things. Mike was a godsend: he took care of everything and contacted me immediately with any latest developments • Aside from being a real professional he is also one of the friendliest, most down to earth people that I’ve come across in business. I can’t imagine any other agent who would do a better job. I highly recommend Mike.” more on Zillow.com
frencH broAd: $2.50 pint night Hi-wire: Food: Free kettle corn oskAr blues: Mountain Music Monday wedge: Food Truck: El Kimchi
AltAmont: Open mic night sAturdAy: AltAmont: Live Music: Open jam w/ Chris O’Neill, 9pm frencH broAd: Live Music: The Low Counts (rock, Americana), 6-8pm
Call ahead for current road conditions
AsHeville brewing comPAny: 2 for Tuesday: $2 cans and pizza slices at both locations
Located between milepost 408 & 409, South of Asheville on the Blue Ridge Parkway.
Hi-wire: $2.50 house pints wedge: Food Truck: Tin Can Pizzeria
The Pisgah Inn is authorized to provide services on the Blue Ridge Parkway under a concession contract with the U.S. Department of Interior.
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A R T S
E N T E R T A I N M E N T
Hypecast Boiler Room show promises local hip-hop feast
by edwin aRnaudin
“When I put together a show, I think of it like a meal,” says Joseph Lepanto of Avlpromo. “You want to have a little bit of everything: a main course and sides that go really well with it.” In the past year, Lepanto (also known as Diggypop Malone, or simply Diggy) has organized roughly 30 hip-hop shows in Asheville using this foodie formula and doing his best to keep mostly local acts on the bill. Now, along with Ravis McMorris (aka DJ Ra Mak), Diggy has booked his biggest show yet. Hype Night will happen Saturday, March 29, at the Boiler Room. A succession of high-energy acts will take the stage. Diggy and Ra Mak have lassoed Asheville rappers Philo (of Fist Fam), Doug Dew, Rose Royce Rique and Mr. Saynomo. Ra Mak will be the evening’s lone DJ, spinning records for each emcee. “That’s what happens at a showcase show,” says Ra Mak. “I’ve worked with all of them before. If you’ve done live hip-hop in the city, you’ve worked with them, and I’m
Open Auditions for Raisin in the Sun By African-American Playwright: Lorraine Hansberry, Directed by Kai Ellijah Hamilton Sunday & Monday, March 30 & 31 @ 7:00 PM Roles—5 men (1: 9-20s; 1:20-50; 2:20-40; 1 Caucasian 20-60); 4 women (1: teen-30; 1: 20-50; 1:40-70) 2 men or women any age Showdates: June 13-15, 19-22, 26-29, 2014 Auditions will consist of cold readings from the script. No ExPERiENCE NECEssARy to AuDitioN. scripts are available for check out. Questions? please contact the director Kai Ellijah Hamilton 828 674 5095 or firstname.lastname@example.org or visit our website. We implore to spread the word about auditions for this very iconic and important play!
kind of like the go-to guy.” That may sound like an elitist boast, but Ra Mak can back it up. He’s been addicted to music since he bought his first record at age 8 — a 45 of Musical Youth’s “Pass the Dutchie,” purchased at the former Family Records in the Asheville Mall. His DJ career began around ’96 in downtown nightclubs; soon after, he played his first hip-hop show at the now defunct Club 828. The local hip-hop scene was very underground, Ra Mak remembers. “A lot of the music that was out back then was more house and trance and stuff like that. For me, it was tough getting out. I spun strictly hip-hop but kind of progressed into house,” he says. “Back then, you really had
229 S. Washington St. Hendersonville, NC 28792
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Long-teRm memoRy: DJ Ra Mak (far left, with Philo, Doug Dew, Diggypop Malone and Rose Royce Rique) bought his first record in 1983 and DJ’ed his first show in ’96. He’s watched the local hip-hop scene evolve for nearly 20 years. Photo by James Mayfield
to focus on your lyrics, and some of the stuff that’s coming out now is lacking that, in my opinion.” Around 2008, in an effort to combat that diminished quality, Ra Mak started hosting hip-hop open mic nights at Club 828. Many of the artists now prominent on the local circuit — Shiloh Corner Boyz and
Flight Club as well as Hype Night artists Rose Royce Rique and Doug Dew, who were then part of a group called Team Olympic — got their start with Ra Mak during that time. And he still keeps old material from those artists: “They call me The Archive,” he says. As a solo artist, Ra Mak has DJ’ed for Cappadonna of Wu-Tang Clan and supported Ghostface Killah and Ras Kaas. He’s also the DJ for Asheville duo Free Radio and with them has opened for Hieroglyphics subgroup Souls of Mischief, Nappy Roots and the revered Bay Area rapper Gift of Gab. In April, he and Free Radio will embark on a monthlong tour of the Southeast with Cee Knowledge of Digable Planets — they’ll stop at The Grey Eagle on April 24.
To Ra Mak, those personal milestones are signs that hip-hop has gradually become more accepted locally over the last two decades. Still, he and Diggy feel there’s room for growth. Stereotypes of the music make some venues nervous, says Diggy. “They reject the culture of hip-hop in general. They see it happen on TV and in the news — artists getting arrested — and think that negative energy is going into our local music.” That mindset has made it harder to book shows in Western North Carolina, with exceptions such as the Boiler Room, One Stop and Timo’s House. But Diggy says most local venues are misinformed: Asheville’s hip-hop artists don’t cause trouble, and their material is often uplifting. “Hiphop culture is based on saying what you believe in,” he says — and some people fear those who are trying to effect social change. But if the early buzz for Hype Night is any indication, those fears may be subsiding. Substantial interest on the event’s Facebook
page prompted the venue to raise the age requirement from 18+ to 21+ and add a $1 surcharge to the $7 ticket price to cover the extra staff needed. If capacity is reached, says Boiler Room owner Jeff Davis, the approach will be strictly one in and one out, a prospect that has organizers excited. “The amount of people saying they’re going to come to this event — if we have half of those and half of the maybes, we’re 75 to 100 people over capacity already,” says Ra Mak. “It’s going to be big.” X
wHat Hype Night with Philo, Doug Dew, Rose Royce Rique, Mr. Saynomo and DJ Ra Mak wHeRe Boiler Room, boilerroomasheville.com wHen Saturday, March 29, at 9 p.m., $8
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by Justin Souther
Funny business Carolina Sketch Fest returns to Asheville Community Theatre
It’s no secret that the Internet has changed the way we consume entertainment. And sketch comedy, with its compact, easily digestible format, is tailor-made for sharing on social media. Get on Facebook, and there’s a three-minute clip from Portlandia. Log on to Twitter, and someone’s passing around a Key & Peele skit.
wHo Carolina Sketchfest, carolinasketchfest.com wHeRe Asheville Community Theatre wHen Saturday, March 29, at 8 p.m. $20 (advance purchase suggested)
In a way, the Internet has created a golden age of sketch comedy, but with this unfortunate side effect: an ever-growing pool of comedians wanting to get in on this renaissance. “How do you get noticed?” asks Tommy Calloway of long-running Asheville comedy troupe The Feral
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Chihuahuas. “It’s a big pond. We have a video called ‘Autoerotic Asphyxiation’ that has like 50,000 views, but then we have much better ideas, much better sketches, that only have 1,000. How do you find that formula that gets you the hits?” One way to recruit new fans, of course, is the old-fashioned approach: live performance. The second Carolina Sketchfest will happen Saturday, March 29, on Asheville Community Theatre’s main stage. Spearheaded by fellow Chihuahua Wyman Tannehill and dubbed the “Mamma-Jamma Edition,” this year’s festival will include performances by the Chihuahuas (celebrating their 10th anniversary) and LYLAS (Asheville’s all-female group, now in its ninth year), as well as Thunderstood, a one-man show out of Greensboro, and Charlotte’s Robot Johnson. The ticket price includes beer courtesy of Asheville Brewing Co., and proceeds from the benefit — which sold out last year — will go to Brother Wolf Animal Rescue. “Everybody is doing their ‘best of’ material,” notes Tannehill. “If you came last year, this show will be completely different.” In live comedy, says LYLAS member Betsy Puckett, “There are opportunities to find new things. We did shows in January, and there was one sketch I did with Jenny [Bunn] where, every single time we stepped out onstage, we found something new.” Tannehill shares that passion for live performance. “What I love is that you’re feeding off the audience,” he says. “People who are up there doing comedy, everything’s laid out. We have no shame: We’re not afraid to fail.” To illustrate that point, Tannehill and Calloway describe an especially bizarresounding sketch, which, without giving too much away, involves each Chihuahua wearing a pink bodysuit, approximating different aspects of a very particular portion of the female anatomy. The Chihuahuas’ irreverent nature, says Calloway, is expressed through “disparate styles within
boys & giRLs cLubs: Local sketch comedy troupes performing at Carolina Sketchfest include all-male group Feral Chihuahuas and all-female group LYLAS. Offstage, members from the two teams have worked together on LaZoom and on video projects, and there’s even one intertroupe romance. Photos courtesy of the artists
a style,” citing influences as wideranging as Kids in the Hall and Monty Python. But if that kind of humor doesn’t do it for you, fear not: The Carolina Sketchfest lineup will feature a diverse array of styles. Robot Johnson, says Tannehill, fits more within the Saturday Night Live mold. “They are doing true parody of celebrities, of hot topics,” he says. And Thunderstood, A.J. Schraeder’s solo act, is a mix of sketch comedy
and multimedia interaction. “It’s not like anything else you will see that night — or anywhere, really,” says Calloway. “It’s very interesting, very unique.” “All these groups are bringing these different tastes,” adds Tannehill. “You’re getting a little bit of everything. What you prefer, whether it be fart jokes or political/ social commentary, you’re going to get it.” X
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by Dave Gilbert
Triumphant return Jeff Thompson’s BEEG Band makes its debut Singer-songwriter Jeff Thompson stands poised for big things in Asheville. In less than a year, he’s generated a sizable following through his weekly gigs at 5 Walnut and is preparing to introduce his BEEG Band at a much larger local venue, The Grey Eagle on Friday, March 28. The concert will not only showcase new arrangements of Thompson’s material and feature a
wHo Jeff Thompson’s BEEG Band wHeRe The Grey Eagle, thegreyeagle.com wHen Friday, March 28, at 8 p.m. $12 advance/$15 day of show
stellar backing band, it will inaugurate a Kickstarter campaign for a recording project, one that will capture his band’s new directions. While this is a new iteration for the musician, Thompson is no stranger to the Asheville scene. A decade ago, in fact, he was staple in local singersongwriter circles. Seven years ago he was better known as folk singer Jeffrey Hyde Thompson. Then he moved to Boulder, Colo., in ’07 to pursue graduate studies at Naropa Institute, where he earned a master’s in transpersonal counseling psychology. After graduating, he worked as a psychotherapist in the Rocky Mountains and hung up his identity as a singer-songwriter. In 2011, Thompson followed a job back to Asheville, but he shied away from returning to music. Then, about 18 months ago a realization dawned on him: “I was living a life not congruent with my heart,” he says. “I asked myself, ‘What do I want to get up and do every morning?’ And the
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answer was music and writing.” He decided to quit his job and dedicate his days to those passions — and it’s been paying off. At the heart of Thompson’s new direction is the desire to be intentionally collaborative. “Solo performance has taken a major back seat for me lately,” he says. “When I’m playing solo, it’s very difficult to really surprise myself. One of the marvelous things about working with the brilliantly creative crew that I have backing me up is that they surprise me all the time. They take songs I’ve written in directions I never would have dreamed of.” In the last six months, Thompson put together a band with pianist Aaron Price, bassist Michael Hynes and drummer James Kylen. He has also worked with the pianist and arranger Lenny Pettinelli, who pushed Thompson to realize bigger sounds for his songs. It was the addition of lead guitarist Duane Simpson that concretized the vision for BEEG Band: “There are three-part vocal harmonies, lush keyboard parts, bass and drum heavy grooves,” Thompson says of the richly textured result. “Really, what makes the sound ‘BEEG’ here is not so much the specifics of the instrumentation but the caliber of musicians I’m working with and the power of the arrangements.” Partnering with Price has been especially inspiring. The pair developed a musical relationship that makes composition a spontaneous process. “Aaron and I share a pop sensibility, but he has more options, harmonically,” says Thompson. In his notebooks, Thompson accumulated three albums worth of lyrics, which he and Price sometimes page through to create new songs. “I sing parts of songs that aren’t fully realized yet, improvising melodies, and Aaron listens to me and plays these terrific chords underneath,” says Thompson. “He can follow and anticipate my melodies and just make up chord progressions.” Thompson’s intellectual development over the past decade, as well as his continued interest in
biggeR is betteR: A circuitous path took folk singer Jeff Thompson (far right) away from music to pursue a degree in transpersonal counseling psychology. But now he’s back to the stage with a full band and a beefed-up sound. Photo by Micah MacKenzie
stage acting and improv theory, have also shaped new considerations of musical performance. He seems to intuit what many perceive as contradiction: “To perform authentically, you’ve got to get into character,” he says. Inspired by Joni Mitchell’s idea that all art is artifice, Thompson points out that a performer rarely feels the full range of emotional experiences when initially composing a song. He emphasizes that performers perform in order to “genuinely feel the feeling of a song,” a realization that has affected his entire approach to playing shows. He says that he wants his concerts to be art from beginning to end, with no wasted moments, as when he
uses spoken-word poetry between songs. Ultimately, Thompson says, “I want to create a shared experience that is qualitatively different from ordinary life. I want [the show] to inspire people.” Art and art-making have taken on new significance, due in part to Thompson’s musical hiatus. “Lyrically and musically, I’d like to think my tunes have greater maturity, depth and complexity than they had during my previous Asheville incarnation,” he says. “I’d like to think that the quality of the overall musicianship in the band is at such a high level because I’ve gotten much better at what I do.” X
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by Kyle Sherard
Stories of the South Narration, a new group show on view at Blue Spiral 1, opens with a portrait of beauty marred by death and consequence. In “Or Some of Those That Fly So High (Little Sparrow),” a 45-by-50-inch countryside rendering by Julyan Davis, a woman in a navy dress stands in front of a rusted red barn. She’s either lamenting or contemplating, head down and knee-deep in jewelweed. But the painting is dotted with contradictions. Jewelweed, a natural remedy to poison ivy, grows in proximity to the noxious vine — so it’s likely within inches of the woman’s ankles. Meanwhile, the could-be beauty of the barn’s red surface is covered with a dozen opossum pelts. The work sets the tone for a show steeped in regionalism, rural undercurrents and figments of Southern folklore. Roadside structures are dilapidated and in disrepair while figures with frazzled hair and sunken eyes sport gothic dresses and ragged shirts. The works tend to isolate individuals, even going so far as to abandon them in a few cases. At the same time, pieces in the exhibit aggrandize barns, junky motels and hand-held signage while cementing a strong sense of place. To a far greater extent, the works use those very landscapes, figures and sidelined fragments to visualize the South’s penchant for storytelling. Sculptures by Dustin Farnsworth embrace haunted isolation. He
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merges mannequin heads and half-foot-tall figures with architectural elements. One of those heads broods under the weight of an intricate, elliptical wooden structure in “A More Sophisticated Form of Chaos.” Its patterned, wood framing is reminiscent of antiquated amusement park construction. In “The Bones Of,” Farnsworth has constructed an entire small-scale theater. It’s complete with a backstage, exposed beams and support cables — all of which the artist has torched. The stage front and floorboards are peppered with burned-out holes and charred wood. A solitary, mere-inches-tall man in a white shirt, red tie and black slacks is seated just to the right of center stage. Hundreds of red roses in black paint fan out in front of him. Joseph DeCamillis’ work employs deconstructed books to keep storylines in the literal foreground. In several pieces, such as “Happy Place,” he partially scratched out titles to enhance literary themes. Whole chunks of the covers and spines have been removed and replaced with paintings on copper plates. That deconstruction is taken even further in “Bound to Happen (Autobiographical Straightjacket),” which features a hand-sewn, patchwork jacket made from the cloth bindings of dozens of dismantled books. Waves of Southern-tinged Greek mythology live in the sculptural works of Christina Bothwell. Lavender-hued glass and pit-fired clay fuse together to form a resting half-person, half-horse beast in “Centaur.” Bothwell’s subjects, both human and humanoid, have the enchanting grotesqueness and deformity that could easily plague a string of Flannery O’Connor characters. A series of photographs by Ralph Burns offers pas-
“MLK Day Parade #8,” by Ralph Burns. Selenium Toned FB Gelatin Silver Print Images courtesy of Blue Spiral 1
toral glimpses of contemporary yet mythic figures — preachers, protesters and stone statues. The images, set among modern-day marching scenes and street shots, reprise historic moments. Past and present are blurred in works like “MLK Day Parade #8” and “Asheville, NC #8.” The latter glances over several signwielding street evangelists preaching during Bele Chere, looking skyward to ignore the hoards of people circling below. Their signs, which read “Evolution is a lie,” capture the former festival’s liturgical turmoil. Pastoral trends descend into sinful and quietly murderous themes in several of Julyan Davis’ ballad paintings. “When We Reach the Shell-filled Sea,” a vertically stacked diptych, depicts a woman thinly veiled by a nightgown. She’s resting on a motel bed while, in the frame below her, an empty pool is guarded by a fence threaded with dead vines. Davis’ works further enhance the mythological and biblical elements already running rampant through the show. They offer these themes up as social realism, though, rather than fantasy or document. The woman in the navy dress returns in “To Grow in the Sick Tree’s Path,” a sweeping, 15-foot-wide triptych on the gallery’s back wall. A landscape of a river raging far above flood stage is flanked by two portraits. On the left, the woman stands alone, peering over a
“Or Some of Those That Fly So High (Little Sparrow),” by Julyan Davis
bridge. On the right, we see only her back, as she faces a man emerging from the water. She’s either falling perilously in love or that much closer to her fate — most likely both. Visit Narration, on view through May 24 at Blue Spiral 1. For more information, go to bluespiral1.com. X
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Send your arts news to firstname.lastname@example.org.
LEO: The Anti-Gravity Show LEO: The Anti-Gravity Show is “an eye-teasing, grin-inducing, deeply impressive work of sustained absurdist magic,” says Time Out New York. In a playful, one-man performance, the acrobatic Leo lives at a 90-degree angle to the rest of the world. “With fluid, real-world handstands, tumbles and falls projected by an ingenious video stage concept, the simple act of standing up is transformed into a stupendous feat, while walking up a wall becomes the most effortless and natural event,” says a press release. LEO will come to Asheville for two showings at the Diana Wortham Theatre on Friday and Saturday, March 28 and 29, at 8 p.m. $35. dwtheatre.com. Photo by Heiko Kalmbach
Asheville City Limits A new monthly series Asheville City Limits, launches at Emerald Lounge on Thursday, March 27. “During this series, we will professionally record HD audio and video of an entire live performance to be published on our website and for syndication on local and regional media outlets throughout the Southeast,” says a press release for the event. It also promises an eclectic mix of musical acts, sourced both locally and nationally. The inaugural show features Western North Carolina-based singer-singwriter duos The Moon and You and Tina & Her Pony; and hard-rocking, pearl-button-shirt-wearing Americana quartet Miss Shevaughn & Yuma Wray (pictured) from Paso Robles, Calif. 8 p.m., $7. emeraldlounge.com. Photo by Joe Dominguez
Man and Superman “The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.” So says George Bernard Shaw, the playwright who penned the Don Juan-themed, four-act drama, Man and Superman, in 1903. In the play, the beautiful, orphaned Ann is entrusted to the care of two men. One is an upstanding citizen, the other is a revolutionary. Take a wild guess as to which guy she falls for. The Montford Park Players will present Man and Superman at the Masonic Temple. Shows are Thursday, March 27, through Sunday, April 13, at 7:30 p.m. ThursdaysSaturdays, and 2:30 p.m. Sundays. $15. manandsuperman.eventbrite.com. Photo courtesy of The Montford Park Players
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Kishi Bashi Composer/violinist/dream-pop artist K Ishibashi (known, on stage, as Kishi Bashi) is not only talented but stylish. In case his artful haircuts, pastel bow ties and elegant recent sets at The Orange Peel and Bele Chere aren’t evidence enough, Ishibashi released new song “Philosophize In It! Chemicalize With It!” through Esquire.com. The track, from his forthcoming album Lighght, is all sweeping and leaping crescendos of layered strings, playful sound effects and sunny vocals. The record doesn’t come out until May 13, but Ishibashi — who lives just down the road in Athens, Ga. — makes a visit to The Grey Eagle on Tuesday, April 1, at 8 p.m. Tall Tall Trees also performs. $12/$14. thegreyeagle.com. Photo by Kaden Shallat
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Center), 531 Haywood Road, 28806. Asheville's only a capella barbershopstyle chorus! We welcome all women who love to sing! www.songosky.org or (866) 824-9547 Parking available behind the church.
Amicimusic A nonprofit chamber music organization. Info: amicimusic.org. • SA (3/29), 10am & noon - Saturday Classical Brunch series. Isis Restaurant and Music Hall, 743 Haywood Road. $15, does not include food. • SA (3/29), 3pm - Chamber music series. Lord Auditorium in Pack Library, 67 Haywood St. Free. • SU (3/30), 5 pm- Singer Madison Fiedler. Jubilee, 46 Wall St. $10. • SU (3/30), 2pm - Chamber music concert. Congregation Beth Israel, 229 Murdock Ave. $20/$15 congregation.
a kingdom foR a stage: The Montford Park Players, North Carolina’s longest running Shakespeare Festival, will hold open audtions for Henry V on March 29 and 30. Actors should prepare a Shakespearean monologue and be prepared to move and sing. (p.46)
Audtions for 'cHArlotte's web' • SA (3/29), 11am-5pm - Held at N.C. Stage, 15 Stage Lane. Info: ashevillecreativearts.org.
Art cerAmic And mixed mediA Artist's tAlk • MO (3/31), 5pm - With sculptor John Byrd. Held in WCU's Bardo Fine and Performing Arts Center. Free.
Henderson county oPen studio tour • Through (5/31) - Registration is open to Henderson County artists. Held Sept. 20-21, 10am-5pm. Info: openstudiotourhc.com.
fiber Arts AlliAnce meeting • TU (4/1), noon-3pm - Open to interested nonmembers. Held at West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Road. Info: tinahvit@ charter.net.
Hickory downtown develoPment AssociAtion • Through TU (4/1) - Submissions open for Downtown Hickory Art Crawl. Info: bsinclair@ bellsouth.net or 322-1121.
Pottery clAsses At tc Arts council Held at 349 S. Caldwell St., Brevard. $40 per participant. Info: email@example.com. • SA (3/29), 9-11am - Pottery For Families. • SA (3/29), 6-8pm - "Try Pottery." For ages 15+.
trAnsylvAniA community Arts council • ONGOING - Submissions open for 2014. Themes and deadlines: Animals, May 6; Potters, June 3; Art Mart, Nov. 10. Info: tcarts.org or 884-2787.
Auditions & cAll to Artists A cAsting cAll for locAl film (pd.) Now in progress for Swag, an action/ adventure/romantic/comedy to be filmed in Asheville. Local talent only, with or without experience. Hispanic, African American, white and Asian actors needed. Reply to firstname.lastname@example.org • For more information, visit www. regal-arts.com cAll for burlesque dAncers (pd.) Audition for a new burlesque troupe, Beauty Booty Brigade: Monday, April 7, 7:30pm, third floor of Loretta's Cafe, 114 N. Lexington Ave. • New to burlesque is fine, but experience learning choreography and a sense of humor is a plus! • Must preregister to attend. Email: email@example.com Auditions for montford PArk PlAyers • SA (3/29), 2-6pm & SU (3/30), 3-6pm - Henry V. Held at Asheville Masonic Temple, 80 Broadway. Registration and info: montfordparkplayers.org.
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videogrAPHer for free food mArket • ONGOING - Volunteer videographer needed for Bounty & Soul's Kickstarter campaign. Funds would launch a mobile healthy food market for low-income communities. Info: acasparian49@ gmail.com or 774-260-0066.
comedy disclAimer comedy Info: disclaimercomedy.com or 216-2331. • WEDNESDAYS, 9pm - Pre-booked open mic. Held at the Dirty South Lounge, 41 N. Lexington Ave. Free. • FRIDAYS, 7-8pm - Stand-up. Held at Metro Wines, 169 Charlotte St. $10.
music song o' sky cHorus (pd.) tuesday 6:45-9:30 Pm song o' sky chorus Calvary Baptist Church (Chandler
cAtHerine russell At tryon fine Arts center • FR (3/28), 8pm - On the Main Stage. 34 Melrose Ave., Tyron. $28/$10 students. Tickets & info: tryonarts.org or 859-8322. celtic HArP concert • SU (3/30), 7pm - Held at Mountain Spirit Coffee House in the Unitarian Universalist Church, 1 Edwin Place. Info: uasheville.org/mountain-spirit-coffeehouse. Hendersonville cHAmber music series • SU (3/30), 3pm - With Kontras String Quartet. Held at First Congregational Church, 1735 5th Ave., Hendersonville. $20. Info: hendersonvillechambermusic.org. lenoir-rHyne A cAPPellA cHoir concert • TH (3/27), 7pm - Held at St. Mark's Lutheran Church, 10 N. Liberty St. Parking is available on Merrimon & Chestnut. Info: 253-0043 or stmarkslutheran.net. music At uncA Tickets and info: 251-6432 • TH (3/27), 7pm - Core Ensemble performs Ain't I a Woman. Free. Humanities Lecture Hall. music At wcu Performances are free and held in the Coulter Building, unless otherwise noted. Info: 227-7211. • TH (3/27), 7:30pm - Percussion Ensemble. • MO (3/31), 7:30pm - Clarinet ensembles. • TU (4/1), 7:30pm - WCU faculty members concert. • 1st THURSDAYS, 7-9pm - Old-time and bluegrass jam. In the university's Mountain Heritage Center. Free.
tHeAter 'medeA' At brevArd college • TH (4/3) through SU (4/6) - A modern adaption. Held in the Porter Performing Arts Center. Thu.-Sat., 7pm; Sun.,
Mountain Xpress and City Lights Bookstore present: Our weekly video series showcasing local musicians goes regional this week with a performance by Jackson County musician ian moore at City Lights Bookstore in Sylva. Look for it Thursday on the website!
2:30pm. $5. Info: brandon.smith@brevard. edu. 35below Located underneath Asheville Community Theatre, 35 E. Walnut St. Info: 254-1320 or ashevilletheatre.org. • TH (3/27), 7:30pm - Listen to This, storytelling series. $10. • FR (3/28) through SU (3/30), 2:30pm - Come Back, Little Sheba. $5. Sunday performance held in the Reuter Center at UNCA. • TH (4/3) through SU (4/19) - Women and Wallace. $15. Thu.-Sat.: 7:30pm; Sun.: 2:30pm Ain't i A womAn: musicAl tHeAtre PerformAnce • TH (3/27), 7pm - Celebrates the lives Sojourner Truth, Zora Neale Hurston, Clementine Hunter and Fannie Lou Hamer. Held in UNCA's Humanities Lecture Hall. Free. Info: firstname.lastname@example.org or 251-6590. AnAm cArA tHeAtre Info: anamcaratheatre.com or 545-3861. • FRIDAYS & SATURDAYS through (3/29), 8pm - The Baltimore Waltz . Held at Toy Boat Community Arts Space, 101 Fairview Road. $15/$12 advance. bebe tHeAtre 20 Commerce St. Info: 254-2621. • TH (3/27) through SU (3/30), Different Strokes! presents Proof. Thur.- Sun.: 7:30pm. diAnA wortHAm tHeAtre 2 South Pack Square. Info: dwtheatre.com or 257-4530. • FR (3/28), 8pm & SA (3/29), 8pm - LEO:
The Anti-Gravity Show. $35/$30 students/$15 child. drAmAtic reAdings from tHe Autumn PlAyers • SU (3/30), 2:30pm - Held in UNCA's Reuter Center. $5. Info: olliasheville.com or 251-6140. events At tHe J.e. broyHill civic center Located on the campus of Caldwell Community College and Technical Institute, 1913 Hickory Blvd. SE, Lenoir. Tickets and info: broyhillcenter.com. • TH (4/3) through SU (4/6) - Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. Thurs.- Sat.: 7:30pm; Sun: 3pm $15/$8 children. flAt rock PlAyHouse Mainstage: Highway 225, Flat Rock. Info: flatrockplayhouse.org or 693-0731. • TH (4/3) through SA (4/19) - Laughter on the 23rd Floor. $40. Wed.-Thu.: 2pm & 8pm; Fri.: 8pm; Sat.: 2pm & 8pm; Sun.: 2pm. montford PArk PlAyers • TH (3/27) through SA (4/13) - Man & Superman. Thu.-Sat.: 7:30pm; Sun.: 2:30pm. $15. Held at Asheville Masonic Temple, 80 Broadway. Tickets: manandsuperman.eventbrite.com. tHe beArds of vAlenccio Art And literAry sAlon • FR (3/28), 7pm - Nightmares and Dreamscapes. Held in a private home at 37 Courtland Ave., Apt. 3B. Info: facebook.com/PinkMonkeyEntertainment. tHeAter At wcu Held in the Bardo Fine and Performing Arts Center. Tickets and info: bardoartscenter.wcu.edu or 227-2479. • TH (4/3) through SU (4/6) - Les Miserables. Thu.-Sat.: 7:30pm; Sun.: 3pm. $15/$10 faculty & staff, students, seniors.
Art At uncA Info: unca.edu. • Through SU (3/30) - Works by Mary Alice Ramsey and Bet Kindley. Highsmith University Union gallery. • TU (4/1) through SA (5/17) International Photo Exhibit. Blowers Gallery, Ramsey Library. Art At wcu Exhibits on display in the Fine Art Museum, unless otherwise noted. Info: fineartmuseum.wcu.edu or 227-3591. • Through FR (5/9) - Pottery from the private collection of Joan Byrd and George Rector. • Through MO (3/31) - Good Thoughts Better, mixed media by Edward J. Bisese. • FR (3/28) through FR (5/23) Photographs by Hugh Morton: An Uncommon Retrospective exhibition. Mountain Heritage Center. Mon.-Fri., 9am-5pm. Info: mhc.wcu.edu or 227-
7129. Opening reception: March 27, 6pm. AsHeville AreA Arts council gAllery 346 Depot St. Hours: Tues.-Sat.: 11am-4pm. Info: ashevillearts.com or 258-0710. • SA (3/29) through FR (4/25) - Impromptu, a multimedia exhibition. Part of the “Point of View” series. Opening reception: March 28, 6pm. AsHeville Art museum 2 N. Pack Square. Info: ashevilleart.org or 253-3227. • Through SU (6/2) - Take 10: Collectors’ Circle 10th Anniversary, mixed works. • Through SU (5/18) - Social Geographies: Interpreting Space and Place, mixed media. • Through SA (6/22) - Pierre Daura: Modernist in the Mountains, paintings. • SA (3/29) through SU (7/20) - Ralph Burns: A Persistence of Vision, photography. Opening reception: March 29, 5pm. AsHeville gAllery of Art 16 College St. Info: ashevillegallery-of-art. com or 251-5796. • Through MO (3/30) - Landscapes in Abstraction, paintings by Karen Keil Brown. bellA vistA Art gAllery 14 Lodge St. Info: bellavistaart.com or 7680246. • Through WE (4/30) - Sacred Places & Dreams, paintings by Christin Zelenka. bender gAllery 12 S. Lexington Ave. Info: bendergallery. com. • Through FR (4/18) - Affinity, glass sculptural works by Kerrick Johnson.
• ONGOING- Paintings by Lelia Canter, Kathleen Kelley and Emily Shields explore human and animal relationships. illustrAtion exHibit by greg vineyArd • Through (3/31) - Love! Love! Love!. 25 percent of sales donated to YWCA’s MotherLove program. Held at The Hop, 640 Merrimon Ave. Info: gregvineyardillustration.com. n.c. Arboretum 100 Frederick Law Olmsted Way. $12 gate fee for non-member vehicles. Info: ncarboretum.org or 665-2492. • FR (3/28) through SU (7/6) What? No Camera?, scenography by Barbara Sammons. PusH skAte sHoP & gAllery 25 Patton Ave. Info: pushtoyproject.com or 225-5509. • Through MO (4/14) - Portrait/street photography by Anthony Bellemare. red House studios And gAllery 310 W. State St., Black Mountain. Thurs.Sun., 11am-6pm. Info: www.svfalarts.org or 669-0351. • Through MO (4/28) - Motion Emotion, mixed media. riverview stAtion 191 Lyman St. Info: riverviewartists.com • Through WE (4/30) - River of Art 2,
works by members of Women In The Arts Foundation. tHe center for crAft, creAtivity & design 67 Broadway St. Info: 785-1357 or craftcreativitydesign.org • Through (5/3) - Taking Shape, works by of Windgate Fellows. Artist’s talk: April 9, 6pm. tHe circle AsHeville Located at 426 Haywood Road. Info: thecircleasheville.com. • Through FR (4/11) - Linoleum prints by Isadora Bullock. trAnsylvAniA community Arts council 349 S. Caldwell St., Brevard. Info: tcarts.org or 884-2787. • Through FR (3/28) - Exploring the Great Outdoors, mixed media. tryon fine Arts center Located at 34 Melrose Ave., Tryon. Info: tryonarts.org or 859-8322. • Through SA (4/19) - Old Ironsides and the War of 1812, an educational exhibit. wickwire fine Art / folk Art 330 N. Main St., Hendersonville. Info: wickwiregallery.com. • Through (3/31) - Contemporary Art for Adult Children, works by Susan Webb.
blAck mountAin college museum + Arts center 56 Broadway. Info: blackmountaincollege. org or 350-8484. • Through (5/17) - Cynthia Homire: Vision Quest, mixed media. blue sPirAl 1 38 Biltmore Ave. Info: bluespiral1.com or 251-0202. • Through SA (5/24) - Nancy Kubale, Whimsical ceramic works. • Through SA (5/24) - Zen, Asian-inspired works. • Through SA (5/24) - Becky Gray, ceramic sculptures. • Through SA (5/24) - Duy Huynh, paintings. • Through SA (5/24) - Narration, mixed media. folk Art center MP 382 on the Blue Ridge Parkway. Info: craftguild.org or 298-7928. • Through TU (4/29) - Works by five Southern Highland Craft Guild members. • Through SU (5/11) - Eyecatchers: The Hunter Collection, quilts. grAnd boHemiAn gAllery 11 Boston Way. Info: bohemianhotelasheville.com or 505-2949. • SA (3/29), 5-8pm - Color Exploration – An Ode to the Mountains, works by Stefan Horik. Hotel indigo 151 Haywood St. Info: boutiquehotel-asheville.com or 239-0239.
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
C L U B L A N D PisgAH brewing comPAny The Alchemystics w/ Bruckshot (reggae, roots rock), 9pm
wednesdAy, mAr. 26
PurPle onion cAfe Fayssoux McLean & Brandon Turner (folk, alt-country, Americana), 7:30-9:30pm
5 wAlnut wine bAr Sufi Brothers (folk), 5-7pm Juan Benavides (Latin), 8-10pm
root bAr no. 1 Vagabond Philosophy (rock), 9:30pm
Alley kAts tAvern Karaoke contest, 7pm
scAndAls nigHtclub Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am
AltAmont brewing comPAny Songwriter night w/ Dave Desmelik, 8:30pm bArley's tAProom Dr. Brown's Team Trivia, 8pm
tHe motHligHt Joshua Carpenter & The American Seams w/ Rogue Band of Youth, War Woman (indie-pop, folk-rock), 9pm
blAck mountAin Ale House Bluegrass jam w/ The Deals, 9pm
timo's House Asheville Drum 'n' Bass Collective, 9pm
blue mountAin PiZZA & brew Pub Open mic w/ Mark Bumgarner, 7-9pm
town PumP Phil Lomac (singer-songwriter), 9pm
bywAter Soul night w/ DJ Whitney, 8:30pm
trAilHeAd restAurAnt And bAr Open jam, 6pm
cork & keg Irish jam w/ Beanie, Vincent & Jean, 7pm
tressA's downtown JAZZ And blues The Westsound Revue (Motown, blues), 9pm
double crown DJ Dr. Filth (country), 10pm
vincenZo's bistro Ginny McAfee (piano, vocals), 7pm
emerAld lounge Blues jam w/ Halley DeVestern Band, 8pm
wHite Horse Alan Reid, 7:30pm
grind cAfe Trivia night, 7pm HigHlAnd brewing comPAny Dan Shearin (singer-songwriter, guitarist), 5:307:30pm
fridAy, mAr. 28
iron Horse stAtion Jesse James (Americana), 6-9pm
185 king street Count M'Butu & The Mar-Tans (funk, R&B, blues, soul), 8pm
isis restAurAnt And music HAll Sirius B (world music), 7:15pm JAck of tHe wood Pub Old-time session, 5pm lobster trAP Ben Hovey (dub-jazz, trumpet, electronics), 7pm odditorium All Hell w/ The Cryptoids (punk), 9pm
PsycHobiLLy dieseL Pick-uP: Chattanooga-based Strung Like a Horse will crash their gypsy-punk garage-grass sound into Jack of the Wood this Saturday, March 29 at 9 p.m. “Their acoustic-driven sound fires people off to the darker areas of this strange universe,” explains the band’s website. The band comically adds, if it was a car, it would be a “psychobilly diesel pick-up.”
Alley kAts tAvern Amos & The Mixx Live, 9:30pm AltAmont brewing comPAny Jeff Sipe Trio (funk, jazz), 9pm AsHeville music HAll Blue Sky Black Death & RBTS Win (hip-hop, psychpop), 10pm
olive or twist 3 Cool Cats Band (vintage rock 'n' roll), 8-11pm tHe PHoenix Jazz night, 8pm
blue mountAin PiZZA & brew Pub Rocket Science, 7-9pm
AtHenA's club Mark Appleford (singer-songwriter, Americana, blues), 7-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am
tHe sociAl Karaoke, 9:30pm
brevArd brewing comPAny Open mic night, 7pm
blue mountAin PiZZA & brew Pub Acoustic Swing, 7-9pm
tiger mountAin tHirst PArlour Sean & Will (classic punk, power pop, rock), 10pm
double crown DJs Devyn & Oakley, 10pm
sly grog lounge Open mic, 7pm
timo's House Release w/ Disc-Oh! (bass), 9pm
tAllgAry's cAntinA Open mic & jam, 7pm
town PumP Open mic w/ Aaron, 9pm
emerAld lounge The Moon & You, Tiny & Her Pony, Miss Shevaughn & Yuma Wray (folk), 8pm
boiler room Check Your Head (formerly Unit 50), Pluto No More & The Lowdown (rock), 9pm-2am
one stoP deli & bAr Brown Bag Songwriting Competition w/ Alex Krug, 6:30pm The Mobros w/ From Bears (indie-rock, neo-psychedelia), 10pm orAnge Peel Downtown After 5 Kickoff Party w/ Empire Strikes Brass (brass band), 7pm
trAilHeAd restAurAnt And bAr Open jam, 6pm
To qualify for a free listing, a venue must be predominately dedicated to the performing arts. Bookstores and cafés with regular open mics and musical events are also allowed / To limit confusion, events must be submitted by the venue owner or a representative of that venue / Events must be submitted in written form by e-mail (email@example.com), fax, snail mail or hand-delivered to the Clubland Editor Hayley Benton at 2 Wall St., Room 209, Asheville, NC 28801. Events submitted to other staff members are not assured of inclusion in Clubland / Clubs must hold at least TWO events per week to qualify for listing space. Any venue that is inactive in Clubland for one month will be removed / The Clubland Editor reserves the right to edit or exclude events or venues / Deadline is by noon on Monday for that Wednesday’s publication. This is a firm deadline.
5 wAlnut wine bAr Pleasure Chest (blues, soul, rock), 9pm-midnight
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
tressA's downtown JAZZ And blues Blues & soul jam w/ Al Coffee & Da Grind, 8:30pm vAnuAtu kAvA bAr Open mic w/ Caleb Beissert, 9pm vincenZo's bistro Aaron Luka (piano, vocals), 7pm
tHursdAy, mAr. 27 185 king street Blues jam w/ Riyen Roots & Brian Phillips, 8pm 5 wAlnut wine bAr The Crow Quill Night Owls (jug band, jazz), 8-10pm Alley kAts tAvern Open mic night, 7pm
frencH broAd brewery tAsting room Peggy Ratusz (blues, jazz), 6-8pm grey eAgle music HAll & tAvern Doug Stanhope (stand-up comedy), 7pm Count M'Butu & The Mar-Tans w/ Blu Bop (funk, R&B, blues, soul), 9:30pm HAvAnA restAurAnt Open mic (instruments provided), 8pm JAck of tHe wood Pub Bluegrass jam, 7pm lexington Ave brewery (lAb) The Friendly Beasts w/ Stuart Johnson (indie, ambient, alternative), 9pm millroom Train Company, 8pm odditorium Open mic night w/ Harry of the Tills, 9pm olive or twist Blue Dawg Band (jazz, swing), 8-11pm
AltAmont brewing comPAny Stuart McNair (folk, Cajun), 9pm
one stoP deli & bAr Phish 'n' Chips (Phish covers), 6pm North of Nashville w/ Soldier's Heart (country, Americana), 10pm
blAck mountAin Ale House Woody Wood (acoustic rock), 9pm
oskAr blues brewery Angela Easterling (Americana, folk), 6pm
bywAter Carey Fridley & The Asheville Aces (country, blues), 9pm clAssic wineseller Leo Johnson (swing, jazz), 7pm cork & keg One Leg Up (jazz, swing), 8:30pm emerAld lounge Minorcan w/ So Many Dynamos (indie-rock), 8:30pm frencH broAd brewery tAsting room The Moon & You (indie-folk), 6-8pm grey eAgle music HAll & tAvern Jeff Thompson's BEEG Band w/ Jennifer Daniels (jazz, alt-rock, singer-songwriter), 8pm HAvAnA restAurAnt Ashley Heath (singer-songwriter), 7pm HigHlAnd brewing comPAny The Lazy Birds (Americana, roots), 6-8pm iron Horse stAtion Mark Shane (blues), 7-10pm isis restAurAnt And music HAll Town Mountain w/ Foghorn Stringband (bluegrass), 9pm JAck of tHe wood Pub The Blind Owl Band (bluegrass-rock, folk), 9pm lobster trAP Mark & Aimee Bumgarner (Americana), 7-9pm
odditorium Comet West, It Looks Sad, Petey (rock), 9pm olive or twist Cha cha lesson w/ Ian, 7:30-8:30pm 42nd Street Jazz Band (jazz), 7:30-10:45pm one stoP deli & bAr Free Dead Fridays w/ members of Phuncle Sam (jam), 5pm Electric Night (dubstep, electronic), 10pm
AtHenA's club Mark Appleford (singer-songwriter, Americana, blues), 7-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am blAck mountAin Ale House The Low Counts (rock, Americana, blues), 9pm blue mountAin PiZZA & brew Pub Patrick Fitzsimons, 7-9pm
oskAr blues brewery Nomadic (electronic funk), 7pm
boiler room Hype Night w/ DJ Ra Mak, Mr. Saynomo, Doug Dew, Rose Royce & Philo (hip-hop), 10pm
PAck's tAvern DJ MoTo (dance, pop, hits), 9pm
bywAter Bear Down Easy (bluegrass, country, Americana), 9pm
PisgAH brewing comPAny Dave Zoll Trio (rock, jam), 8pm
clAssic wineseller Joe Cruz (Bealtes & Elton John covers), 7pm
r3mix3d Audio/visuAl sPAce Axxa Abraxas w/ Omingnome (psych-rock), 8pm
club eleven on grove Spring Fling Jam w/ DJ Super See (old school), 9pm2am
root bAr no. 1 Pete Stein (blues), 9:30pm scAndAls nigHtclub Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 1am scully's DJ, 10pm-2am soutHern APPAlAcHiAn brewery Grits & Soul (Americana, Southern soul), 8-10pm sPring creek tAvern Andy Buckner & The Southern Soul Campaign (Southern rock), 8-11pm tAllgAry's cAntinA Brief Awakening (variety), 9:30pm tHe green room bistro & bAr Jesse Iaquinto (Americana), 8:30pm tHe motHligHt Juan Benavides Group w/ Mande Foly (flamenco pop, world beat), 9:30pm
cork & keg Brennen Leigh & Noel McKay (singer-songwriter duo), 8:30pm emerAld lounge Merlefest Showcase w/ David & Valerie Mayfield and Grits & Soul (Americana, bluegrass), 8:30pm frencH broAd brewery tAsting room The Low Counts (rock, Americana), 6-8pm green room cAfe & coffeeHouse Elise Pratt & Mike Holstien (jazz), 6:30-8:30pm grey eAgle music HAll & tAvern Asheville Talent Slam (benefit for Eblen Charities), 7pm
iron Horse stAtion Barb Turner (R&B), 7-10pm
timo's House Bobby FKN White, DJ Kutzu, BIGhands, Hunter, Rebel Savage (hip-hop), 9pm
JAck of tHe wood Pub Strung Like A Horse (bluegrass-rock, folk-punk), 9pm
tressA's downtown JAZZ And blues Isabel Parker Project (blues, funk, soul), 7pm Jim Arrendell & The Cheap Suits (soul, funk), 10pm vAnuAtu kAvA bAr Kings County Lighthouse (instrumental hip-hop, ambient electronic music), 9pm vincenZo's bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm wAter'n Hole Darren & The Buttered Toast (R&B, multi-genre), 9pm wHite Horse Weather Report Tribute, 8pm wild wing cAfe A Social Function (acoustic), 9:30pm
sAturdAy, mAr. 29
Wed AN EVENING WITH SIRIUS B. W/ MIDDLE EASTERN-THEMED FOOD 3/26 PAIRINGS $5 added to the tab • 7:15pm Thu 3/27 BELL’S HOPSLAM AND FOOTHILLS SEXUAL
CHOCOLATE BEER RELEASE W/ FOOD PAIRINGS
(No Cover) • 9pm
Fri 3/28 TOWN MOUNTAIN WITH FOGHORN STRING BAND $12 / $14 • 9pm CLASSICAL BRUNCH FEAT. AMICIMUSIC’S“THE BIG APPLE”
Sat 3/29 $15 • First Seating: 10am / Second Seating: Noon
JIM ARRENDELL DANCE PARTY $5 • 9pm Mon KIRTAN WALLAH TOUR — CHANTING WITH KRISHNA DAS 3/31 $30 / $40 • 7pm
Wed CHARLIE TRAVELER PRESENTS: AN EVENING WITH 4/2 JESSE FISCHER AND SOUL CYCLE $5 • 7:15pm
Every Sunday JAZZ SHOWCASE 6pm - 11pm • $5 Every Tuesday BLUEGRASS SESSIONS 7:30pm - midnite
743 HAYWOOD RD • 828-575-2737 • ISISASHEVILLE.COM
lobster trAP Riyen Roots Trio (blues), 7pm olive or twist 3 Cool Cats Band (vintage rock 'n' roll), 7:30-10:45pm one stoP deli & bAr Reggae Family Jam, 2pm Plankeye Peggy w/ Skunk Ruckus (rock, experimental), 10pm orAnge Peel All Time Low w/ Man Overboard & Hand Guns (emopop), 8pm oskAr blues brewery The Stump Mutts (alt-rock), 7pm PAck's tAvern A Social Function (classic hits, rock 'n' roll, dance), 9pm PisgAH brewing comPAny Raising Caine (alt-country, Americana), 8pm
Wednesday, March 26th Halley DeVestern Band (#1 Blues Band in NY) 5-7PM • FREE! -----------------------------------AVL Blues Jam- Halley DeVestern Band 8PM-12AM EVERY Wed.--- FREE! Thursday, March 27th
ASHEVILLE CITY LIMITS feat. The Moon And You w/ Tina & Her Pony and Miss Shevaughn & Yuma Wray! * LIVE Video/Audio Recording! * 7:30 PM•Only $7!
root bAr no. 1 Call the Next Witness (rock), 9:30pm
Friday, March 28th Minorcan w/ So Many Dynamos 8:30 PM • FREE! Saturday, March 29th
scAndAls nigHtclub Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am
MERLEFEST Showcase feat. Grits & Soul and David & Valerie Mayfield! 7:30 PM • Only $5!
PurPle onion cAfe Lazybirds (Americana), 8-10pm
185 king street Moonshine Babies (Americana), 8pm
scully's DJ, 10pm-2am
5 wAlnut wine bAr Andrew J. Fletcher (piano), 6-8pm Aaron Kaz Electro Folkloric (world beat), 9pmmidnight
soutHern APPAlAcHiAn brewery Appalachian Fire (bluegrass), 8-10pm
Alley kAts tAvern The Twisted Trail Band, 9:30pm
HigHlAnd brewing comPAny Bayou Diesel (Cajun, zydeco), 6-8pm
isis restAurAnt And music HAll Jim Arrendell dance party (Motown, soul, oldies), 9pm
toy boAt community Art sPAce The Baltimore Waltz (adult-themed dark comedy), 8pm
HAvAnA restAurAnt 3rd Nature (funk, jam), 10pm-2am
tiger mountAin tHirst PArlour Dr. Filth (soul, psych, punk), 10pm
town PumP East Coast Dirt (folk, funk, jam), 9pm
Dinner Menu till 10pm Late Night Menu till
sPring creek tAvern Jason York & Friends (Americana), 8-11pm tAllgAry's cAntinA Rory Kelly (rock), 9:30pm
AltAmont brewing comPAny Open jam w/ Goodness Graces & Chris O'Neill (jam), 9pm
tHe green room bistro & bAr Wendy Collona (Americana), 8:30pm
AsHeville music HAll Pigeons Playing Ping Pong w/ Nomadic & Electric Soul Pandemic (funk, psychedelic, jam), 10pm
tHe motHligHt Cosmonauts w/ Black Sea (drone-pop, fuzz-rock, punk), 9:30pm
Monday, March 31st Muckety Mutts Monday Mixer! Dogs Welcome! 10% of bar donated to Animal Haven of Asheville!•5pm-7pm every Mon!•FREE!
Simply Pickin’ Bluegrass Jam! 8pm-12am every Mon •FREE! Tuesday, April 1st
DANIEL & THE LION 5-7 PM • FREE!
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
Send your listings to firstname.lastname@example.org. cLub diRectoRy
tHe sociAl Karaoke, 9:30pm tiger mountAin tHirst PArlour DJ Devyl's Hands (psychedelic, indie, metal, rock), 10pm
The place to be for
MARCH MADNESS 10 BIG SCREENS
1/2 OFF Martinis & Bottles of Wine
2.00 Pints 32 Taps to Choose From
3.25 Flights 3.00 Greek & Italian Beer
5.00 Jager Bombs, Angry Balls & LIT’s
5.00 Mojitos & Bloody Marys 2.00 Domestics
10.00 Yugo Burger with Craft Beer & Keep the Pint Night
Tuesday 5.00 Margaritas & 3.00 Corona and Corona Light bottles
3/28 The Blind Owl Band 9PM 10/25 Sarah Lee Guthrie 3/29 StrungIrion Like A Horse 9PM & Johnny w/ Battlefield • 9pm $10 4/5 The Rocket Queens (all female gunsFirecracker & roses tribute band from nyc) 10/26 Jazz Band W/ POSH HAMMER 9PM & HALLOWEEN Costume Party & Contest • 9pm $8 4/11 Woody Pines 9PM 10/27 Vinegar Creek • 9pm FREE 4/12 Meagan Jean & The KFB 10/28W/Mustard Plug • 9PM 9pm $8 MARINA ORCHESTRA w/ Crazy Tom Banana Pants 4/14 Drivers 9PM 10/29Levee Singer Songwriters • 7-9pm FREE in the Round 4/18 Blair Crimmons & The Hookers w/ Anthony Tripi, Elise Davis W/ DARYL HANCE, GUITARIST FROM
MOFRO 9PM MudJJ GREY Tea &• 9pm FREE
Open Mon-Thurs at 3 • Fri-Sun at Noon SUN Celtic Irish Session 5pm til ? MON Quizzo! 7-9p • WED Old-Time 5pm SINGER SONGWRITERS 1st & 3rd TUES THURS Bluegrass Jam 7pm
95 Patton at Coxe • Asheville 252.5445 • jackofthewood.com
timo's House Subterranean Shakedown: Matty Harper, Mary B, Lionize (bass party), 9pm town PumP Billy Litz & The Mountain City Rhythm Section (funk, Americana), 9pm tressA's downtown JAZZ And blues Carolina Rex (rock, blues, funk), 10pm vincenZo's bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm wAter'n Hole Swamp Candy (delta blues), 9pm wHite Horse AmiciMusic: The Big Apple, 8pm
sundAy, mAr. 30 5 wAlnut wine bAr The Get Right Band (funk, dirty blues), 7-9pm AsHeville music HAll Aligning Minds w/ Blockhead (dubstep, electronic), 10pm blAck mountAin Ale House Jazz brunch w/ Mike Gray Trio, 11:30am blue mountAin PiZZA & brew Pub Mark Bumgarner (Americana), 7-9pm double crown Karaoke w/ Tim O, 9pm Hi-wire brewing William Borg Schmitt (singer-songwriter, folk), 5-7pm iron Horse stAtion Mark Shane (blues), 5-8pm isis restAurAnt And music HAll Jazz showcase, 6pm JAck of tHe wood Pub Irish session, 5pm millroom Service Industry Night karaoke dance party w/ pingpong, 9pm
31 PATTON AVENUE-UPSTAIRS
odditorium Entheon, We Kill Kids, MRSA, Slaves of Conscience (metal), 9pm olive or twist Shag & swing dance lesson w/ John Dietz, 7-8pm DJ Michael Filippone, 10pm
55 COLLEGE STREET-DOWNSTAIRS
The Brown Bag Songwriting 26 Competition Hosted by Alex Krug one stop
6:30 PM $3 All Ages
one stop one stop
MAR THE MOBROS w/ From Bears 26 10 PM $5 21+
27 NORTH OF NASHVILLE THU
w/ Soldier’s Heart 10 PM $5 21+
28 BLUE SKY BLACK DEATH FRI
& RBTS WIN
10 PM $8/$10 21+
29 PLANKEYE PEGGY SAT
w/ Skunk Ruckus 10 PM $3 21+
w/ Nomadic & Electric 29 EARPHUNK Soul Pandemic 10 PM $8/$10 21+ SAT
MAR feat. Blockhead & 30 WAVEWORMS More TBA 10 PM $12/$15 21+
Hannah Aldridge and Hannah Kaminer 10 PM $12/15 21+
A SH EV IL L EM U SICHAL L . C O M 50
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
one stoP deli & bAr Bluegrass brunch w/ The Pond Brothers, 11am orAnge Peel Krishna Das (kirtan), 7pm scAndAls nigHtclub Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am soutHern APPAlAcHiAn brewery Blue Sunday jam w/ Garry Segal (blues), 5-7pm sPring creek tAvern Mark Bumgarner (Americana), 1-4pm tHe motHligHt Ballister (jazz), 10pm tHe sociAl '80s night, 8pm town PumP Sister Mary, 6pm vincenZo's bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm wHite Horse Scott Ainslie, 7:30pm
mondAy, mAr. 31 185 king street Old School Trivia w/ Spencer Jones, 8pm 5 wAlnut wine bAr The Moon & You, 8-10pm
185 king stReet 877-1850 5 waLnut wine baR 253-2593 aLtamont bRewing comPany 575-2400 tHe aLtamont tHeatRe 348-5327 aPotHecaRy (919) 609-3944 aqua cafe & baR 505-2081 aRcade 258-1400 asHeviLLe civic centeR & tHomas woLfe auditoRium 259-5544 asHeviLLe music HaLL 255-7777 atHena’s cLub 252-2456 baRLey’s taP Room 255-0504 bLack mountain aLe House 669-9090 bLue mountain Pizza 658-8777 boiLeR Room 505-1612 bRoadway’s 285-0400 tHe bywateR 232-6967 coRk and keg 254-6453 cLub Remix 258-2027 cReekside taPHouse 575-2880 adam daLton distiLLeRy 367-6401 diana woRtHam tHeateR 257-4530 diRty soutH Lounge 251-1777 doubLe cRown 575-9060 eLeven on gRove 505-1612 emeRaLd Lounge 232- 4372 fiRestoRm cafe 255-8115 fRencH bRoad bReweRy tasting Room 277-0222 good stuff 649-9711 gReen Room cafe 692-6335 gRey eagLe music HaLL & taveRn 232-5800 gRove House tHe gRove PaRk inn (eLaine’s Piano baR/ gReat HaLL) 252-2711 HangaR Lounge 684-1213 HaRRaH’s cHeRokee 497-7777 HigHLand bRewing comPany 299-3370 isis music HaLL 575-2737 jack of HeaRts Pub 645-2700 jack of tHe wood 252-5445 Lexington avenue bReweRy 252-0212 tHe LobsteR tRaP 350-0505 metRosHeRe 258-2027 miLLRoom 555-1212 monte vista HoteL 669-8870 moonLigHt miLe 335-9316 native kitcHen & sociaL Pub (581-0480) odditoRium 505-8388 onefiftyone 239-0239 one stoP baR deLi & baR 255-7777 o.HenRy’s/tug 254-1891 tHe oRange PeeL 225-5851 oskaR bLues bReweRy 883-2337 Pack’s taveRn 225-6944 tHe PHoenix 877-3232 PisgaH bRewing co. 669-0190 PuLP 225-5851 PuRPLe onion cafe 749-1179 Red stag gRiLL at tHe gRand boHemian HoteL 505-2949 Root baR no.1 299-7597 scandaLs nigHtcLub 252-2838 scuLLy’s 251-8880 sLy gRog Lounge 255-8858 smokey’s afteR daRk 253-2155 tHe sociaL 298-8780 soutHeRn aPPaLacian bReweRy 684-1235 static age RecoRds 254-3232 stRaigHtaway cafe 669-8856 taLLgaRy’s cantina 232-0809
tigeR mountain tHiRst PaRLouR 407-0666 timo’s House 575-2886 town PumP 357-5075 toy boat 505-8659 tReasuRe cLub 298-1400 tRessa’s downtown jazz & bLues 254-7072 vanuatu kava baR 505-8118 vincenzo’s 254-4698 westviLLe Pub 225-9782 wHite HoRse 669-0816 wiLd wing cafe 253-3066 wxyz 232-2838
lobster trAP Jay Brown (Americana, folk), 7-9pm odditorium Comedy open mic w/ Tom Peters, 9pm one stoP deli & bAr Hannah Aldridge & Hallan Kaminer (Americana), 8pm Tuesday night techno, 10pm
THe friendLy beasTs
tHe sociAl Big Generator (rock, blues), 7-9pm
backstage • 9:00PM • $6
timo's House '90s night w/ DJ Ra Mak (90s dance, hip-hop, pop), 9pm
fri. apr 4
tressA's downtown JAZZ And blues Pauly Juhl & Oso, 8:30pm
Alley kAts tAvern Open mic, 8pm AltAmont brewing comPAny Old-time jam, 7pm blAck mountAin Ale House Karaoke, 9pm bywAter Open mic w/ Taylor Martin, 9pm courtyArd gAllery Open mic (music, poetry, comedy, etc.), 8pm double crown Punk 'n' roll w/ DJ Leo Delightful, 10pm isis restAurAnt And music HAll Kirtan Wallah w/ Krishna Das (chanting), 7pm JAck of tHe wood Pub Quizzo, 7-9pm lobster trAP Tim Marsh (singer-songwriter), 7-9pm odditorium Giant Giants, Triathalon, That's A Thing (rock, experimental), 9pm oskAr blues brewery Mountain Music Mondays (open jam), 6pm tHe motHligHt Asheville Synth Club, 8pm tiger mountAin tHirst PArlour Honky-tonk (classic country & rockabilly) w/ DJ Lil Lorruh & David Wayne Gay, 10pm vincenZo's bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm westville Pub Trivia night, 8pm wHite Horse The Reminders, 7:30pm
tuesdAy, APr. 1 5 wAlnut wine bAr The John Henry's (ragtime), 8-10pm Alley kAts tAvern Bluegrass Tuesday, 8pm AltAmont brewing comPAny Open mic w/ Chris O'Neill, 8pm blAck mountAin Ale House Trivia, 7pm club eleven on grove Dance, 8:30-11pm cork & keg Honkytonk jam w/ Tom Pittman & friends, 6:30pm double crown Punk 'n' roll w/ DJs Sean and Will, 10pm grey eAgle music HAll & tAvern Kishi Bashi w/ Tall Tall Trees (indie, orchestral pop), 8pm isis restAurAnt And music HAll Bluegrass session, 7:30pm JAck of tHe wood Pub Singer-songwriters, 7pm Jake Book (folk), 9pm
thurs. Mar 27
scully's Triva night, 9-11pm
w/ sTUarT JoHnson
reagan boggs w/ THe CoaL Men
vincenZo's bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm
backstage • 8:30PM • $8
westville Pub Blues jam, 10pm
thurs. apr 10
wHite Horse Irish sessions, 6:30pm Open mic, 8:45pm
wednesdAy, APr. 2 5 wAlnut wine bAr Draton & The Dragons (acoustic), 5-7pm Juan Benavides (Latin), 8-10pm Alley kAts tAvern Karaoke contest, 7pm
Hard roCkeT w/ POsH HaMMeR
backstage • 9:00PM • $6
thurs. apr 17
w/ MINDsHaPeFIst, ZOMbIe QUeeN
backstage • 9:00PM • $6
bArley's tAProom Dr. Brown's Team Trivia, 8pm blAck mountAin Ale House Bluegrass jam w/ The Deals, 9pm bywAter Soul night w/ DJ Whitney, 8:30pm cork & keg Irish jam w/ Beanie, Vincent & Jean, 7pm double crown DJ Dr. Filth (country), 10pm emerAld lounge Blues jam, 8pm grind cAfe Trivia night, 7pm isis restAurAnt And music HAll Jesse Fischer & Soul Cycle (jazz fusion, psychedelic soul, indie-folk), 7:15pm JAck of tHe wood Pub Old-time session, 5pm lobster trAP Ben Hovey (dub-jazz, trumpet, electronics), 7pm millroom The Silver Palms (indie-electronic), 9pm
TAVERN DOWNTOWN ON THE PARK Eclectic Menu • Over 30 Taps • Patio 13 TV’s • Sports Room • 110” Projector Event Space • Shufﬂeboard • Darts Open 7 Days 11am - Late Night
LIVE MUSIC... NEVER A COVER
odditorium Cut Throat Freak Show, 9pm one stoP deli & bAr Brown Bag Songwriting Competition w/ Alex Krug, 6:30pm Les Racquet & The Heritage (indie-rock), 10pm
DJ Moto (dance, pop hits)
orAnge Peel SOJA w/ Murs (reggae), 9pm PisgAH brewing comPAny Dead Winter Carpenters (Americana, old-time), 6pm sly grog lounge Open mic, 7pm tAllgAry's cAntinA Open mic & jam, 7pm tHe motHligHt Tin Foil Hat w/ The Volt Per Octaves & Jason Daniello (pop, electronic), 9:30pm tHe PHoenix Jazz night, 8pm tHe sociAl Karaoke, 9:30pm tiger mountAin tHirst PArlour Sean & Will (classic punk, power pop, rock), 10pm
A Social Function
(classic hits, rock n’ roll, dance)
Your Headquarters for
13 Big Screen TVs & Great Drink Specials!
20 S. SPRUCE ST. • 225.6944 PACKSTAVERN.COM mountainx.com
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
SAtuRdAy cHicken & WAffleS Sunday Brunch
Send your listings to email@example.com.
pinball, foosball, ping-pong & a kickass jukebox kitchen open until late 504 Haywood Rd. West Asheville • 828-255-1109 “It’s bigger than it looks!”
bReakfast bReakdown: Big Boss Sausage will be cooking something up at the Altamont Brewing Company on Friday, April 4, at 9 p.m. The rock band is known for their sense of humor, often putting a hilarious, original twist to popular songs.
timo's House Release w/ Disc-Oh! (bass), 9pm
HAvAnA restAurAnt Open mic (instruments provided), 8pm
town PumP Open mic w/ Aaron, 9pm
JAck of tHe wood Pub Bluegrass jam, 7pm
trAilHeAd restAurAnt And bAr Open jam, 6pm
millroom Molly Parti Birthday Bash w/ Paper Tiger (pop, electronic), 7pm
tressA's downtown JAZZ And blues Blues & soul jam w/ Al Coffee & Da Grind, 8:30pm vAnuAtu kAvA bAr Open mic w/ Caleb Beissert, 9pm vincenZo's bistro Aaron Luka (piano, vocals), 7pm
BACHELOR & BIRTHDAY PARTY
A True Gentleman’s Club
Over 40 Entertainers!
AdAm dAlton distillery Bridging the Gap (old school hip-hop, vinyl night), 10pm2am Alley kAts tAvern Open mic night, 7pm
AsHeville music HAll Consider The Source (jam), 10pm
½ OFF COVER CHARGE DOES NOT INCLUDE UFC NIGHTS
EVERY UFC FIGHT GREAT DRINK SPECIALS EVERY NIGHT
Mon-Thurs 6:30pm–2am Fri-Sat 6:30pm–3am
520 SWANNANOA RIVER RD, ASHEVILLE, NC 28805 • (828) 298-1400 maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
185 king street Mountain Roots Revue Series w/ Crying Wolf, 8pm
AltAmont tHeAter Frank Vignola (jazz guitarist), 8pm
BRING THIS AD IN FOR
tHursdAy, APr. 3
blAck mountAin Ale House Lyric (acoustic, soul), 9pm brevArd brewing comPAny Open mic night, 7pm cork & keg Old-time jam, 7pm First Thursday Square Dance, 8pm
odditorium Country Songwriters Showcase w/ Alison Self, Roland J. Cole, Pat Reedy, Hometeam & Hearts Gone South, 9pm one stoP deli & bAr Phish 'n' Chips (Phish covers), 6pm Cosby Sweater w/ Brett Rock & Skymatic (electronic), 10pm PisgAH brewing comPAny Red Honey (country, blues), 8pm scAndAls nigHtclub Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am tHe motHligHt Village of Spaces w/ Hot Norwegian, Delta Quadrant & Falcon Mitts (folk), 9pm timo's House Asheville Drum 'n' Bass Collective, 9pm town PumP Dave Desmelik (Americana, folk), 9pm trAilHeAd restAurAnt And bAr Open jam, 6pm tressA's downtown JAZZ And blues The Westsound Revue (Motown, blues), 9pm vincenZo's bistro Ginny McAfee (piano, vocals), 7pm
fridAy, APr. 4
double crown DJs Devyn & Oakley, 10pm
185 king street Nikki Talley, 8pm
frencH broAd brewery tAsting room One Leg Up Duo (jazz), 6-8pm
Alley kAts tAvern Amos & The Mixx Live, 9:30pm
grey eAgle music HAll & tAvern Chris Knight w/ Aaron Lee Tasian (singer-songwriter), 8pm
AltAmont brewing comPAny Big Boss Sausage (rock, blues, country), 9pm
AsHeville music HAll Local Legends w/ Lyric, BFree, Topper, Blaze3, Philo, Alpha Lee, Lazz Quinn & DJ Ramak (hip-hop, multigenre), 10pm
AtHenA's club Mark Appleford (singer-songwriter, Americana, blues), 7-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am
AtHenA's club Mark Appleford (singer-songwriter, Americana, blues), 7-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am
blAck mountAin Ale House The Get Right Band (funk, rock), 9pm
boiler room Onj, One Track Mind & Young American Landscape (synth-pop), 9pm-2am club eleven on grove Grown Folks DJ Jam (old school hip-hop, R&B, soul, funk), 9pm-2am cork & keg Red Hot Sugar Babies (jazz), 8:30pm
boiler room Shellshock (goth, industrial, ebm, alt-dance) w/ DJ Drees & DJ Joey Shull, 10pm-3am cork & keg The Juan Benavides Group (flamenco, Latin, jazz), 8:30pm emerAld lounge oddSTAR w/ Stereospread & The Walking Sticks (electronica, alternative, pop), 8:30pm frencH broAd brewery tAsting room Tina & Her Pony (indie, bluegrass, folk), 6-8pm
emerAld lounge Po'folk w/ Ryan Barber Jus K, JJ Dae, Miss TNP & Candasa Nicole (R&B, soul), 8pm
grey eAgle music HAll & tAvern David Lamotte w/ Sarah Moor on cello (folk), 8pm
frencH broAd brewery tAsting room Todd Cecil & Backsouth (rock, Americana), 6-8pm
HAvAnA restAurAnt Nomadic (funk, jam), 10pm-2am
green room cAfe & coffeeHouse Carrie Morrison & Steve Whiteside (Americana), 6:30-8:30pm
HigHlAnd brewing comPAny Typical Mountain Boys (Bluegrass), 6:30-8:30pm
grey eAgle music HAll & tAvern Kool Keith (hip-hop) w/ Lord King (Floating Action side project, reggae) & Kosha Dillz, 9pm
isis restAurAnt And music HAll Mipso w/ Chris Eldridge (bluegrass, folk), 9pm
HAvAnA restAurAnt Ashley Heath (singer-songwriter), 7pm HigHlAnd brewing comPAny Zip the Hippo (Americana, fusion-rock), 6:30-8:30pm isis restAurAnt And music HAll Della Mae (folk), 9pm JAck of tHe wood Pub Raising Caine (Americana, country), 9pm lexington Ave brewery (lAb) Reagan Boggs w/ The Coal Men (country, Americana), 8:30pm
orAnge Peel Secret Agent 23 Skidoo (kids hip-hop), 11am
odditorium Debon Surgery Benefit, 9pm
scAndAls nigHtclub Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am
scAndAls nigHtclub Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 1am scully's DJ, 10pm-2am tiger mountAin tHirst PArlour Dr. Filth (soul, psych, punk), 10pm town PumP Ginny McAfee (folk, country, bluegrass), 9pm vincenZo's bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm wild wing cAfe A Social Function (acoustic), 9:30pm
sAturdAy, APr. 5 Alley kAts tAvern The Twisted Trail Band, 9:30pm AltAmont tHeAter Pierre Bensusan (world music), 8pm AsHeville music HAll Styles & Complete w/ Luce Wayne (electronic), 10pm
50 Shades of Grey
one stoP deli & bAr Reggae Family Jam, 2pm ManG (WEEN tribute), 10pm
PisgAH brewing comPAny The Stringtown Ambassadors (bluegrass, Americana), 9pm
PisgAH brewing comPAny American Babies w/ Bread & Butter (Americana, indie), 9pm
MUST PRESENT COUPON. LIMIT ONE PER CUSTOMER. EXP. 04/30/14
odditorium Bipoloroid, The Shine Bros, Paint Fumes, Three Loud Crowd (rock), 9pm
millroom Dom Flemons String Trio (folk), 9pm
PAck's tAvern DJ MoTo (pop, dance, hits), 9pm
20% OFF of Any One Item
lobster trAP Sean Mason Jazz Trio, 7-9pm
PAck's tAvern Lyric (funk, pop, soul), 9pm
orAnge Peel Aer w/ Ground Up & DJ Smiles (rap, reggae, pop, indie-rock), 9pm
6.95 DVD SALE!
JAck of tHe wood Pub The Rocket Queens (all-female Guns 'n' Roses tribute) w/ Posh Hammer, 9pm
lobster trAP King Leo (jazz), 7-9pm
one stoP deli & bAr Free Dead Fridays w/ members of Phuncle Sam (jam), 5pm Mr. Breakdown w/ Henry & The Invisibles (funk, pop, soul), 10pm
Wednesday • March 26 acoustic Wednesday W/ dan shearin 5:30-7PM Friday • March 28 the Lazy Birds (aMerican roots) 6-8PM saturday• March 29 Bayou dieseL (dance/cajun/zydeco) 6-8PM Friday • aPriL 4 ziP the hiPPo (aMericana/Fusion rock) 6:30-8:30PM saturday• aPriL 5 tyPicaL Mountain Boys (BLuegrass) 6:30-8:30PM
scully's DJ, 10pm-2am tHe motHligHt Boogarins w/ Fan Modine & Warm the Bell (psychedelic pop), 9:30pm
OPEN FOR LUNCH M-F 11-3PM
Count m’Butu & the mar-tans w/ Blu Bop
Jeff thompson’s Beeg Band w/ Jennifer daniels
town PumP Todd Cecil & Back South (rock), 9pm vincenZo's bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm
7pm • $25
tHe sociAl Karaoke, 9:30pm tiger mountAin tHirst PArlour DJ Devyl's Hands (psychedelic, indie, metal, rock), 10pm
grey eagle Comedy series presents:
sat 3/29 tue 4/1
9:30pm • $10/$12
TRILOGY BOOKS & ACCESSORIES
PLUS SIZE LINGERIE $19.99 BOGO DVDS
DVD RENTALS ALSO AVAILABLE
8pm • $12/$15 3rd annual asheville
a Benefit for eblen Charities 7pm • $10/15
Kishi Bashi w/ tall tall trees 9pm • $12/14
thu Chris Knight w/ aaron lee tasjan 8pm • $15/18 4/3 fri 4/4 sat 4/5
Kool Keith & lord King (floating action side project)w/ Kosha dillz 9pm • $17/20 an evening with
david lamotte Joined by sarah moor on Cello 8pm • $12/15
Where Adult Dreams Come True • • OPEN 7 DAYS • •
SUN-THUR 8 AM - MIDNIGHT FRI SAT 8 AM - 3 AM (828) 684-8250
2334 Hendersonville Rd. (S. Asheville/Arden)
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
M O V I E S C
by Ken Hanke & Justin Souther
HHHHH = max rating contact firstname.lastname@example.org
Pick of tHe week
fRiday, maRcH 28 tHuRsday, aPRiL 3 Due to possible scheduling changes, moviegoers may want to confirm showtimes with theaters.
diRectoR: Denis Villeneuve (Incendies) PLayeRs: Jake Gyllenhaal, Melanie Laurent, Sarah Gadon, Isabella Rossellini, Joshua Peace
AsHeville PiZZA & brewing co. (254-1281) Please call the info line for updated showtimes. Her (r) 7:00, 10:00
PsycHoLogicaL HoRRoR tHRiLLeR Rated R
the nut Job (Pg) 1:00, 4:00
tHe stoRy: A man discovers he has an exact double and decides to meet him. tHe Lowdown: Claustrophobic, psychological horror is the order of the day with Enemy, a film that will appeal mostly to cineastes in search of the unusual and the unsettling.
Chances are in the neighborhood of 100 percent that you won’t find anything stranger than Denis Villeneuve’s Enemy in theaters any time soon. Whether or not that’s a good thing is a matter of taste. I saw the film with two other critics. One liked it more than I did, and one liked it a lot less. It is safe to say that none of us were indifferent to it or its “what the hell?” ending. Though just now released, Enemy appears to have been filmed before Villeneuve’s Prisoners (2013). Both films star Jake Gyllenhaal, and the similarities pretty much end there. Unlike the rather clunky, overly serious Prisoners, the primary objective in Enemy appears to be messing with the viewer’s mind. I suppose some might liken it to a David Lynch film, but it feels more like a David Cronenberg head trip to me. Villeneuve has claimed that everything you need to know to understand the film is on the screen. Maybe. Maybe that’s true if you’re Denis Villeneuve, or
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
cArmike cinemA 10 (298-4452) cArolinA cinemAs (274-9500) 300: rise of an empire 2d (r) 7:00. 9:30 bad words (r) 10:30, 12:45, 3:00, 5:15, 7:30, 9:40
jake gyLLenHaaL in Denis Villeneuve’s striking psychological thriller Enemy.
divergent (Pg-13) 11:00, 12:00, 2:00, 3:00, 5:00, 6:00, 8:00, 9:00, 10:00 enemy (r) 11:45, 2:15, 4:30, 6:45, 8:55
maybe that’s true if you watch the film multiple times. As an outsider on a single viewing, I’m skeptical of the claim. When I first saw Lynch’s Mulholland Drive (2001), I could only make marginal sense of it, but I loved it. On a second viewing, it seemed a lot more straightforward — and its appeal was diminished. That may be the case with Enemy. The premise is that Adam (Jake Gyllenhaal) is a fairly boring and bored history professor. He gives the same lectures over and over, resides in a personality-free apartment, maybe has sex with his girlfriend, Mary (Mélanie Laurent), and that’s about it. But one day a fellow teacher suggests a movie he thinks Adam might enjoy. (Whether or nor this is an innocent suggestion is unclear.) Adam watches the movie and sees a bit actor in it who looks exactly like him. A little research leads him to discover that this man, Anthony (also Gyllenhaal), is his exact double. When Anthony and Adam finally meet, it turns out that they even have identical scars. There are differences between the two men — not the least of which is that Anthony is rather the Mr. Hyde to Adam’s Dr. Jekyll. The question is: Are they really
two different people? (According to Adam’s mother (Isabella Rosselini), they certainly aren’t separated twins.) Or are they different expressions of the same person? Up to a point, that second choice seems viable, but it doesn’t quite hold up over the course of the film. Whenever you think you know — or might know — what’s going on, Enemy takes another turn that suggests you’re probably wrong. This is built into the film from the very onset with the posh but seriously creepy private sex club that Anthony belongs to — a place of unspoken depravity and spiders. The film is rife with spiders, giant spiders and spider imagery — the exact meaning of which may lie in the film’s abrupt final scene. Then again, it may not. The film is first and foremost a disconcerting meditation on the nature of identity in the oppressive, ugly world of the film (never has Toronto looked so unappealing). In the end, Enemy is more about how it feels than what it says. It it creepy? Yes. Is it puzzling? Yes. Is it disturbing? Yes. Will it appeal to you? That’s a hard call, but it will have an appeal
god’s not dead (Pg) 10:30, 1:00, 3:45, 6:45, 9:15 the grand budapest Hotel (r) 10:15, 11:30, 12:30, 1:45, 2:45, 4:00, 5:00, 6:30, 7:30, 8:45, 9:45 the lego movie 2d (Pg) 11:30, 2:00, 4:30 mr. Peabody & sherman 2d (Pg) 10:15, 12:45, 3:00, 5:30, 7:45 muppets most wanted (Pg) 10:30, 1:00, 3:30, 6:00, 8:45 need for speed (Pg-13) 11:15, 2:15, 5:15 noah (Pg-13) 10:15, 12:15, 1:15, 3:15, 4:15, 6:15, 7:15, 8:15, 9:15 sabotage (r) 11:00, 1:30, 4:00, 6:30, 9:00 cinebArre (665-7776) co-ed cinemA brevArd (883-2200) 3 days to kill (Pg-13) 7:00 mr. Peabody and sherman (Pg) 1:00, 4:00 ePic of Hendersonville (693-1146) fine Arts tHeAtre (232-1536) gloria (r) 1:20, 4:20, 7:20, Late show Fri-Sat only 9:40 the grand budapest (r) 1:00, 3:00, 5:10, 7:30, Late show Fri-Sat only 9:40 flAtrock cinemA (697-2463) winter’s tale (Pg-13) 4:00, 7:00 regAl biltmore grAnde stAdium 15 (684-1298) united Artists beAucAtcHer (298-1234)
to those looking for something out of the ordinary. Rated R for some strong sexual content, graphic nudity and language. reviewed by Ken Hanke Starts Friday at Carolina Cinemas.
Divergent HH diRectoR: Neil Burger (Limitless) PLayeRs: Shailene Woodley, Theo James, Jai Courtney, Kate Winslet, Zoe Kravitz dystoPian action Rated Pg-13 tHe stoRy: In the future, society has been separated into factions as a means of keeping the peace, but one girl — who discovers she may be factionless — tries to fit in with a new group as a means of survival. tHe Lowdown: An overlong, joyless film that fancies itself as heady sci-fi. It’s full of moral questions, but is really just a boneheaded action flick with unappealing lead actors.
On the surface, Neil Burger’s Divergent (much like its source novel) is little more than an attempt to capitalize on the success of The Hunger Games. It marks the beginning of what’s bound to be a whole lot of inevitable knockoffs — all involving sad teens living in dystopian sci-fi landscapes — coming to theaters in the next few years. But beyond the obvious comparisons to The Hunger Games — from the female lead, to the subject matter, set design and color palette — Divergent is little more than an ’80s or early ’90s Arnold Schwarzenegger sci-fi vehicle, right down to the jokey one-liners. There are shades of The Running Man (1987) and Total Recall (1990), but reimagining these kinds of films for teens isn’t quite as fun or interesting in practice as it is in theory. A lot of this lies in the execution. Burger and company fancies Divergent as important filmmaking, and therefore make attempts to tackle big, moral dilemmas. But its ideas become too muddled to be coherent. Like those aforementioned Schwarzenegger movies, there’s the sheen of intelligence, but it lacks any real enlightenment.
Unlike the dystopian America of The Hunger Games, Divergent posits a dystopian Chicago, one that is walled-in and crumbling after some unnamed war seemingly destroyed society. The survivors have been separated into five factions, each based on a person’s virtues and each filling a purpose within the social contract. This is where the film’s hero, Tris (Shailene Woodley, The Spectacular Now), comes in. She’s of the humble Abnegation faction, but she soon finds out she’s actually a rare and uncontrollable Divergent. This could mean death if she were found out, since the Divergents inherently threaten the delicate balance of her world. In order to survive, she attempts to join up with the daring Dauntless, a sort of manic, butch police force who run around climbing things and getting neck tattoos. These guys are probably supposed to appeal to the more rebellious tweens in the audience. Most of the film follows Tris’ training with Dauntless, which mires the plot down in pointless sidebars. This makes Divergent’s absurd 139-minute running time all the more ridiculous. Beyond cinematic influences, Divergent is simply a jumble of disparate science fiction tropes. Any questions the film raises have already been posited by science fiction authors in the past, with Kurt Vonnegut’s “Harrison Bergeron” and Philip K. Dick’s Clans of the Alphane Moon coming immediately to mind. But those authors had answers — or, at the very least ideas — where Divergent is more worried about mundane drama of stressed out futuristic teens. This is where the film’s joylessness comes in. The tone of the film is entirely straight-faced and self-important. Not helping things is Woodley, who wanders through the entire movie with a puckered face, a vague sense of angst and zero personality. Even worse is her chemistry with the requisite brooding, muscle-bound hero of the picture, Theo James (Underworld: Awakening), who’s most defining moments include taking off his shirt and resembling an elongated James Franco. (In this respect, Divergent starts to look a lot like Twilight.) Together, they create an expressionless void, which, conveniently, perfectly describes
Divergent. Rated PG-13 for intense violence and action, thematic elements and some sensuality. reviewed by Justin Souther Playing at Carolina Cinemas, Epic of Hendersonville, Regal Biltmore Grande, United Artists Beaucatcher.
God’s Not Dead H
FEET HURT? Dr. Daniel Waldman, DPM FACFAC
diRectoR: Harold Cronk (Jerusalem Countdown) PLayeRs: Kevin Sorbo, Shane Harper, David A.R. White, Trisha LaFache, Dean Cain, Willie Robertson sHameLess PRoPaganda meLodRama Rated Pg tHe stoRy: A Christian student argues for the existence of God against his atheist professor. tHe Lowdown: Your basic “faith-based” movie complete with its stereotypical villains and rigged arguments. It will please those it’s aimed at, but isn’t likely to do much for anyone else.
God may not be dead, but I’d be willing to wager this movie at least gave him a faint wave of nausea. The first person I know who read the plot synopsis remarked, “This sounds like an April Fool’s joke.” After sitting through God’s Not Dead — in everincreasing disbelief over what I was seeing — I only wish it was an April Fool’s joke. Any movie that wants me to take spiritual advice from Duck Dynasty’s Willie Robertson (not once, but twice) is quacking from the wrong duck blind. I’m not even sure why I’m reviewing it. A movie like this is aimed at an audience who isn’t interested in whether or not it’s a good film, but merely whether or not it espouses ideas and agendas with which they’re in agreement. Of course, if the purpose really was to spread the word, they might do well to listen, but these movies aren’t about spreading the word; they’re about playing to a presold audience. This is less faith-based than faith-pandering. This one strikes me as more morally dubious and unrealistic than most. It’s firmly built upon the shaky premise that Christians are a persecuted minority in America. To prove this, the movie
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
by Ken Hanke & Justin Souther
HHHHH = max rating staRting fRiday
sets up a plot wherein out of a class of “about 80” students, only one student — our hero, Josh Wheaton (Shane Harper) — is sufficiently Christian to stand up against the sneering atheist professor (Kevin Sorbo) who is going to predicate one-third of the students’ grades based on their willingness to write “God is dead” on a piece of paper and sign it. Josh’s option? Prove that God is real to the class. I don’t know if I’m more alarmed by this straw-man setup or the fact that our professor thinks Ayn Rand belongs on a list of philosophers with Nietzsche and Bertrand Russell. What is most remarkable is that all professors in his department are sneering atheists (all intellectuals are evil or suspect, just like in the McCarthy era). For that matter, everyone who isn’t a Christian in this movie is a card-carrying louse. There’s not much dramatic tension to be had. After all, we can safely predict that Josh and Jesus will prevail, and the professor will go down in flames and stand revealed as a sniveling little coward with a grudge against God. (The only surprise is how far down he’ll go.)
It doesn’t end there. The film seems to think it’s Altmanesque in its multistory structure. So we get the nasty atheist blogger (Trish LaFache) whose nasty atheist boyfriend (Dean Cain) dumps her when it turns out she’s dying of cancer. But then it turns out that he is the brother of the professor’s Christian girlfriend (Cory Oliver), who has about had it with the prof’s sneering atheist superiority. And then there’s the Chinese exchange student who’s being affected by Josh’s beliefs. Plus, there’s the Muslim girl (Hadeel Sittu), who gets caught listening to Franklin Graham podcasts and is slapped around and thrown out by her strict Islamic father. (I won’t even get into the presence of one of those Alzheimer’s victims who suddenly has a profoundly lucid comment.) The film also pulls a leaf from the old Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed (2008) propaganda playbook by citing nonexistent facts and facts that can’t stand scrutiny over the ending credits to convince the viewer of the “war on Christianity.” It’s like watching Fox News. It just costs more and takes longer. All of this is kind of tied together by Pastor Dave (David A.R. White)
— a character who makes Bing Crosby’s Father O’Malley look deep. Frankly, Pastor Dave strikes me as wildly irresponsible. He urges Josh to risk his future, his family and his girlfriend to debate the professor because God wants him to. Bear in mind, this is at no personal risk to Pastor Dave. Later on, he counsels the now homeless Muslim convert girl about how the Bible teaches her to do without. An offer of a place to stay might be more practical. By the end of the movie, we have one death, one person dying of cancer, at least one broken family and a converted Chinese guy who puts his entire family at risk by texting “God’s not dead” to everybody in his phone book. But none of this matters because of “all the smiles in heaven tonight” over the conversions. Some will find this profound. Others may be less charitable. Rated PG for thematic material, brief violence and an accident scene. reviewed by Ken Hanke Playing at Carmike 10, Carolina Cinemas, Epic of Hendersonville, Regal Biltmore Grande.
Community Screenings 20tH century women leAders documentAry series WE (4/2), 6-8pm - Includes discussion with UNCA history professor. This week: Fannie Lou Hamer. Held at Pack Memorial Library, 67 Haywood St. Info: 250-4700. ‘girl rising’ screening At wcu • TH (4/1), 8pm - A discussion on empowering women and girls follows screening. Held in the A.K. Hinds University Center. Free. Info: email@example.com.
GARDENING SECTION Is now OPEN for the season! Jump on board and advertise! firstname.lastname@example.org 56
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
‘stAte of conflict: nortH cArolinA’ • FR (3/28), 7pm - A documentary by Bill Moyers. Hosted by Henderson County Democratic Party at 905 Greenville Highway, Hendersonville. Free. Info: myhcdp.com or 692-6424. AsHeville Art museum outside Artist film screenings • SA (3/29), 2pm & SU (3/30), 2 pm Angel That Stands Beside Me and Mr. Dial Has Something to Say. 2 S. Pack Square. Free with admission or membership. Info: 253-3227 or ashevilleart.org. clAssic world cinemA foreign film series • FR (3/28), 8pm - Good Morningl by Yasujiro Ozu (Japan 1959). Free. In the Courtyard Gallery of Phil Mechanic Studios,
Enemy See review in “Cranky Hanke.”
Bad Words This is the kind of limited release film that generally gets previewed for Asheville critics. That it didn’t is mildly suspicious, but only mildly. The film marks the directorial debut of Jason Bateman who has also cast himself in the lead as the foul-mouthed 40-yearold who has managed to get himself into a national children’s spelling bee through a loophole in their rules. The studio calls it “subversive.” (The title is clearly meant to invoke Bad Santa.) The critics are leaning positive. We shall see. (R)
Noah And here is the Big Event of the week — Darren Aronofsky’s Noah, the unregenerately non-mainstream director’s take on the famous Bible story. (Surely, you don’t need the basics of the plot.) The film is already controversial in some corners for being merely “inspired by” the story and not a faithful depiction. It could be interesting. (Pg-13)
Sabotage Hack writer-director David Ayer — working from somebody else’s script — brings us an Arnold Schwarzenegger R-rated actioner. This one has Der Arnold as the head of a DEA task force — a task force that, following a successful raid on a drug cartel, find themselves being dispatched one after another by an unknown assailant. Yes, it’s And There Were None reconfigured as an action picture. (R)
109 Roberts St. Info: ashevillecourtyard.com or 273-3332. dHArmA movie nigHt • 4th FRIDAYS, 7pm - A screening and discussion of a Dharma-inspired film. Held at The Shambhala Meditation Center, 19 Westwood Place. Info: email@example.com or 490-4587. film screenings At wcu Held in the A.K. Hinds University Center. Info: 227-2324. • TU (4/1), 8pm - Girl Rising. Free
Muppets Most Wanted HHS diRectoR: James Bobin (The Muppets) PLayeRs: Ricky Gervais, Tina Fey, Ty Burrell, Steve Whitmire, Eric Jacobson comedy Rated Pg tHe stoRy: The Muppets are unknowingly entangled in an international art theft after Kermit the Frog is mistaken for a master criminal and thrown in prison. tHe Lowdown: A harmless little movie that exists solely for diehard Muppet fans and is more cute than entertaining.
Despite bringing back the director and writer of The Muppets (2011), which reimagined Jim Henson’s creations as a modern film franchise, whatever charm that existed in the 2011 film has vanished in its sequel, Muppets Most Wanted. The limited appeal of The Muppets rested on a loving nostalgia for its colorful, foam rubber cast. And while nostalgia wasn’t enough to make that film more than quaint and lightly enjoyable, it was enough to prop it up. Muppets Most Wanted falls short in comparison. What’s strange, unfortunate and a bit ironic is that the film opens with a musical number pointing out the often-diminished returns of sequels and the formulaic nature of Muppet movies. So we know that director James Bobin is fully aware of the inherent problems with his movie. Self-awareness, however, isn’t enough to solve the issues. Really, what it boils down to is that you can only do so much with a Muppet movie, which probably explains the 12-year gap between Muppets From Space (1999) and The Muppets. There’s a plot of sorts, involving The Muppets, unbeknownst to them, getting ensnared in a series of art thefts around Europe, but this is simply an artifice for nonstop celebrity cameos (though the idea of “celebrity” is stretched here a good bit), corny jokes and musical numbers. There’s nothing new or imaginative going on here, meaning the film will likely only appeal to the strictly initiated. Perhaps I’m being too harsh on this little movie. After all, it’s pleas-
ant enough, watchable and never purports to be anything else. At the very least, the songs are miles better than the much-lauded ones in The Muppets. But there’s no spark here, and everyone seems to be going through the motions. This is a movie that smoothly references both the Marx Brothers and Chan-wook Park’s Oldboy (2003), yet remains monumentally dull. So while Muppets Most Wanted is certainly an unassuming, generally warm film, it’s not a particularly inspired one. Rated PG for some mild action. reviewed by Justin Souther Playing at Carmike 10, Carolina Cinemas, Epic of Hendersonville, Regal Biltmore Grande. kRisten beLL in the big screen incarnation of Veronica Mars, a film that will play better to fans of the TV show than to the uninitiated.
Veronica Mars HHH diRectoR: Rob Thomas PLayeRs: Kristen Bell, Jason Dohring, Chris Lowell, Percy Daggs III, Tina Majorino comedy mysteRy Rated Pg-13 tHe stoRy: Big screen follow-up (seven years later) to the cult TV series. tHe Lowdown: Despite hints of something greater and an engaging performance by Kristen Bell, this is really for fans of the show. Otherwise, it’s strictly OK.
I’m afraid I’m on the outside looking in with the big screen incarnation of Veronica Mars. I have never seen the TV show and was really only dimly aware of its existence. I had concluded it was a kind of modern-day Nancy Drew thing — only more sophisticated and with extra grit — and based on the movie that seems to be pretty much the case. (I am not saying that as a negative thing. I like the Nancy Drew books just fine in their original editions.) I appreciate the fact that the filmmakers here managed to create a story involving the Veronica Mars characters that was reasonably comprehensible — as a fairly tepid mystery — to an outsider like myself. But let’s be honest, this movie is for the fans. Sure, I was able to fill in most of the
blanks concerning the relationships among the various characters, but was I ever emotionally invested in them? Not really. It may not have helped that — apart from Kristen Bell, a guest bit by Jamie Lee Curtis and a cameo by Dax Shepard — I had no clue who any of the actors were. My guess is that if you’re a fan of the series, the experience may be considerably richer. The premise of the film is that Veronica Mars (Bell) has put her teen sleuthing past and the town of Neptune, California behind her. She’s gotten herself a law degree and is all set to join a high-toned New York law firm. She’s also engaged to a nicely drab (of course) guy named Stosh “Piz” Piznarski (Chris Lowell). (What are the chances of our heroine actually marrying a guy called “Piz?”) All this gets knocked for your proverbial loop when an old high school friend is murdered, and Veronica’s sometime-boyfriend, Logan Echolls (Jason Dohring), is the major suspect. The idea is that she’ll fly out to Neptune, pull Logan’s fat out of the fire and quickly return to her new, saner life in New York. If you’ve seen more than five movies, you know how this is going to play out. The question is how much fun you will — or won’t — have watching it happen. This is where the familiarity factor really kicks in. If you don’t know these characters already, you’re not likely to care very much about what happens. Even when you can figure out things like old grudges from the context, it’s hard to be very invested
in them. It’s like being the lone outsider at a party where everybody else is swapping in-jokes and trading barbs. Even if you can figure out the gist of it, it’s not very fulfilling. If the movie had any real surprises in it, it might be different. If it had any real sense of style, it might be different, too. But this is TV-show basics. A coating of wide-screen cinematography and a big screen don’t change that. The unfortunate thing is that the film hints at a true, hard-boiled detective-fiction drive, and at least some of this appears to have been inherent in the show. Veronica might well be a lightweight, distant relative of Dashiell Hammett’s Continental Op in the 1929 novel, Red Harvest, with the corrupt town of Neptune standing in for the book’s Personville. (Think of the town in the 1990 Coen Brothers’ film Miller’s Crossing.) Of course, Veronica Mars is set in the present, and the corruption is of a different kind. Now, it’s more about a crooked police department taking care of the town’s rich folks at the expense of everyone else. The film doesn’t take this idea very far, and it only hints at the “one percent” factor, but it’s there. It makes the film more interesting, but only just. Really, if you’re not hooked on the series, there’s not that much here. Rated PG-13 for sexuality including references, drug content, violence and some strong language. reviewed by Ken Hanke Playing at Carolina Cinemas.
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ALL Sunday Shows $1 ALL Tuesday Shows $2 Every Mon-Thu
ALL Shows $1 After 9pm
by Ken Hanke & Justin Souther
12 Years a Slave HHHHS
ed, aimless and occasionally ugly action picture with zero spark. Rated Pg-13
Chiwetel Ejiofor, Michael Fassbender, Benedict Cumberbatch, Brad Pitt, Paul Giamatti, Lupita Nyong'o
American Hustle HHHHS
biographical drama The story of Solomon Northup, a free black man kidnapped and sold into slavery. Powerful, brilliantly — and beautifully — made. It boasts a gallery of fine performances and should finally propel Chiwetel Ejiofor to the stardom he’s deserved for 10 years. It’s a fine film, but maybe not quite a masterpiece. Rated R
300: Rise of an EmpireHS Sullivan Stapleton, Eva Green, Hans Matheson, Callan Mulvey, Lena Headey
Saturday Morning Shows ONLY $1
Sat & Sun
Brunch Menu for all shows before 12pm
ancient world action The navy of Athens attempts to thwart a sea-born invasion from the Persian Empire. A pointless excuse for a lot of unexciting bloodletting with no thematic direction and zero vision. Rated R
3 Days to Kill HH Kevin Costner, Amber Heard, Hailee Steinfeld, Connie Nielsen, Tómas Lemarquis
Movie Line 828-665-7776 Biltmore Square - 800 Brevard Rd Asheville, NC 28808
espionage action A CIA agent’s dying wish to reconnect with his estranged family is derailed when he’s offered a miracle cure for his disease — but only if he kills an especially nefarious target. A disjoint-
Christian Bale, Bradley Cooper, Amy Adams, Jennifer Lawrence, Jeremy Renner cheerfully amoral sometimes factbased comedy drama Vaguely factbased (Abscam) comedy drama about not-very-bright people trying to out-con each other. Funny, cynical and even a little demented, David O. Russell’s latest boasts incredible turns from its high-powered cast, a genuine sense of the late 1970s and a pop soundtrack to die for. Rated R
Better Living Through Chemistry HHHH
Ralph Fiennes, F. Murray Abraham. Tony Revolori, Mathieu Amalric, Adrien Brody. Jeff Goldblum, Jude Law
Divergent HH Shailene Woodley, Theo James, Jai Courtney, Kate Winslet, Zoe Kravitz dystopian action In the future, society has been separated into factions as a means of keeping the peace, but one girl — who discovers she may be factionless — tries to fit in with a new group as a means of survival. An overlong, joyless film that fancies itself as heady sci-fi that’s full of moral questions, but is really just a boneheaded action flick with unappealing lead actors. Rated Pg-13
Frozen HHHS (Voices) Kristen Bell, Idina Menzel, Jonathan Groff, Josh Gad, Santino Fontana, Alan Tudyk
TO RESERVE YOUR SPACE CALL (828) 251-1333 OR WWW.MOUNTAINX.COM 58
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
shameless Propaganda melodrama A Christian student argues for the existence of God against his atheist professor. Your basic “faith-based” movie complete with its stereotypical villains and rigged arguments. It will please those it’s aimed at, but isn’t likely to do much for anyone else. Rated Pg
dark comedy A timid, henpecked pharamacist falls under the spell of a bored femme fatale. A somewhat clever dark comedy that falls prey to predictability, but is kept afloat by Sam Rockwell’s performance. Rated nR
Psychological Horror thriller A man discovers he has an exact double and decides to meet him. Claustrophobic, psychological horror is the order of the day with Enemy, a film that will appeal mostly to cineastes in search of the unusual and the unsettling. Rated R
On newsstands April 15th.
Kevin Sorbo, Shane Harper, David A.R. White, Trisha LaFache, Dean Cain, Willie Robertson
The Grand Budapest Hotel HHHHH
Jake Gyllenhaal, Melanie Laurent, Sarah Gadon, Isabella Rossellini, Joshua Peace
With more with 85,000 copies distributed throughout Buncombe County, Asheville Eats and Drinks is the most comprehensive Dining Guide in Western North Carolina.
God’s Not Dead H
Sam Rockwell, Olivia Wilde, Michelle Monaghan, Ray Liotta, Ken Howard, Ben Schwartz, Jane Fonda
drama comedy A divorced woman on the edge of 60 decides to start living her life rather than watching from the sidelines. Refreshingly frank look at love — and life — in an age group the movies tend to shy away from. A very good film made into an essential one by Paulina Garcia’s performance as the indomitable Gloria. Rated R
animated fantasy A newly crowned queen — with the ability to freeze things — plunges her country into perpetual winter. It’s certainly dazzling to look at, but apart from the presence of two female leads and no real male hero, it’s pretty standard Disney fare, decked out in a largely forgettable, but occasionally irritating, songs. Not a bad movie, but far from a great one. Rated Pg
Gloria HHHHS Paulina Garcia, Sergio Hernández, Diego Fontecilla, Fabiola Zamora, Luz Jiminez
comedy with tragic overtones The story of the last great days of the Grand Budapest Hotel and its legendary concierge, M. Gustave H. Absolutely breathtaking in its design, its cinematic flair and its tragicomic tone, which is masked by a deliberately absurd, thrill-comedy plot. Wes Anderson is at the peak of his form here — and so is Ralph Fiennes. Rated R
The Lego Movie HHHS (Voices) Chris Pratt, Will Ferrell, Elizabeth Banks, Morgan Freeman, Liam Neeson animated adventure An uninteresting Lego figure — living in a Lego world — is chosen to fulfill a prophecy that will free his people. A fun, often cute (and eventually sappy) movie that’s enjoyable but disposable. Rated Pg
The Monuments Men HHH George Clooney, Matt Damon, Bill Murray, Cate Blanchett, John Goodman, Jean Dujardin, Bob Balaban, Hugh Bonneville fact-based war drama with comedic touches Fact-based story of the men who rescued stolen art treasures from the Nazis in WWII. Yes, it should have been great and it’s only pretty good, but it’s not the disaster many have painted. It’s solidly made and individual sequences are excellent, even if the whole doesn’t work so well. Rated Pg-13
Mr. Peabody & Sherman HHHH (Voices) Ty Burrell, Max Charles, Ariel Winter, Allison Janney, Stephen Colbert, Leslie Mann animated fantasy comedy The world’s smartest dog, Mr. Peabody, must fight to keep his adopted son, Sherman. Brisk, funny and entertaining, Mr. Peabody & Sherman may not set the world on fire and certainly won’t change the way you think about animated films, but it does provide a fun 90 minutes at the movies. Rated Pg
The Stranger HHHHS susPense tHRiLLeR Rated NR Orson Welles’ most financially successful (and therefore least admired) film, The Stranger is a fairly straightforward suspense thriller — but it’s a suspense thriller that only Welles could make. Its hero is a Nazi hunter (Edward G. Robinson) who’s obsessed to the point of being a little unbalanced. Its villain is an unregenerate Nazi (Welles) hiding in a picturebook American town, complete with a church topped with an improbable and out-of-place clock with life-size clockwork figures. It may not be high art, but it makes for a terrific movie.
Mountain Xpress readers
make buying local a priority.
The Hendersonville Film Society will show The Stranger Sunday, March 30, at 2 p.m. in the Smoky Mountain Theater at Lake Pointe Landing Retirement Community (behind Epic Cinemas), 333 Thompson St., Hendersonville.
The White Sheik HHHHS comedy Rated NR Federico Fellini’s first film The White Sheik (1952) is often
brushed aside as a minor work — almost as if it wasn’t a “real” Fellini movie at all. That’s too bad, because this relatively simple comedy about a honeymoon gone wrong when the wife sneaks off just to meet her hero, The White Shiek, has elements of the director’s mature films that won’t resurface till 8 1/2 (1963). It also boasts the template for Giulietta Massina’s Cabiria character and touches on numerous Fellini pre-occupations. Don’t sell this one short. The Asheville Film Society will screen The White Sheik Tuesday, April 1, at 8 p.m. in Theater Six at The Carolina Asheville and will be hosted by Xpress movie critics Ken Hanke and Justin Souther.
Daughter of Dr. Jekyll HHHS HoRRoR Rated NR Edgar G. Ulmer’s (yes, the same guy who made the 1934 The
Black Cat) Daughter of Dr. Jekyll (1957) is lacking in both budget and sense. It somehow manages to not only confuse Mr. Hyde with a werewolf, but it comes up with the screwy idea that a drug-induced monster could be an inheritable trait. Not only that, but the movie spends nearly a third of its running time establishing that the daughter of Dr. Jekyll is in fact the daughter of Dr. Jekyll. This is why the movie is a pure delight, too. The Thursday Horror Picture Show will screen Daughter of Dr. Jekyll Thursday, March 27 at 8 p.m. in the Cinema Lounge at The Carolina Asheville and will be hosted by Xpress movie critics Ken Hanke and Justin Souther.
Good MorningHHHH comedy Rated NR Yasujirô Ozu’s Good Morning (1959) is typical of the film-
maker’s work in that it looks, rather disapprovingly, at the growing westernization of post-war Japan. But Good Morning — with its story of two boys refusing to speak until their father buys a TV set — is slighter, warmer and more accepting than most of Ozu’s films. By no means a major work, but it’s a pleasant one. Classic World Cinema by Courtyard Gallery will present Good Morning Friday, March 28, at 8 p.m. at Phil Mechanic Studios, 109 Roberts St., River Arts District (upstairs in the Railroad Library). Info: 273-3332, www.ashevillecourtyard.com.
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• Cabinet Refacing • Furniture Repair Want to advertise in Marketplace? 828-251-1333 x111 firstname.lastname@example.org • mountainx.com/classifieds
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Homes for sAle
LOVE YOUR LOCAL
mountAin cAbin One bedroom A-frame mountain retreat. Hwy 80 below Parkway, close to Mt. Mitchell. Easy access to creek and trout farm. Tax value $37K, asking $34K firm. Serious inquiries only. 828-337-6778.
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This little tabby has had a rough life. He was found wandering the streets as a stray. When he arrived here, he was very sick, so we immediately began to rehabilitate him. He was treated and fed, and given a dashing “lion trim” to remove his matted fur. Mufasa is a little on the small side, very social, and loves to be petted. This guy has come a long way, All he needs now is a forever family!
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blAck mountAin 2BR/1BA apartment,$595, heat/central air, washer dryer connections, very nice! (828) 252-4334. nortH AsHeville Townhouse style apartments, one mile from downtown on busline 1BR/1BA $495. • 2BR/1BA $595. • 3BR/1BA $695. Call (828) 252-4334.
Asheville Humane Society
14 Forever Friend Lane, Asheville, NC 828-761-2001 • AshevilleHumane.org 60
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
Pet friendly 2 br 1bA 800sf APArtment Swannanoa, convenient. Very clean, private. Hardwood floors, creek-side deck. Lovely setting, must see to appreciate. Views of mountain and meadow. WD hook ups. Roomy bathroom, freshly re-done. $850. 828275-0328
condos/ townHomes for rent 1 bdrm condo west AsHeville $650 1 Bedroom Condo W. Asheville new,clean,quiet,safe. Large unit with all new app liances,dishwasher,microw ave,garbage disposal,w/d hookups. Just painted. $650/mo. 337-7999. small dog or a cat considered. 337-7999
roommAtes roommAtes All AreAs - roommAtes.com. Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: http://www.Roommates. com. (AAN CAN)
Homes for rent
AsHeville eAstduPlex-Half house close in. 3BR, 2BA, hardwood floors, fireplace, dishwasher, WD. Woods and trails. No pets/smoking. $825/ month, plus utilities. 828273-6700.
AFRICA • BRAZIL WORK/ study! Change the lives of others while creating a sustainable future. 6, 9, 18 month programs available. Apply today! www. OneWorldCenter.org (269) 591-0518. info@OneWorldCenter.org (AAN CAN)
commerciAl/ business rentAls
office suites Downtown Asheville. 1-5 office suites from 490 sqft to 3,200 sqft. Modern finishes, elevator, central air. Affordable, full service rates. G/M Property Group 828-281-4024. email@example.com
APArtments for rent
Meet Lola! This sweetheart of a little hound mix is an adorable dog. She loves to play and always seems so happy. She seems to do well with other dogs and the pervious owner said she did very well with their 6 year old. Unfortunately this highly food motivated cannot be in a household with cats. So if you don’t have cats and are looking for a fun playful dog, come and visit with little Lola!
Mindy & Millie
including cable and internet. • $150/day (2-day minimum), $650/week, $1500/ month. Weaverville area. • No pets please. (828) 6589145. mhcinc58@yahoo. com
office sPAce for rent Downtown office space in historic building at 1 Rankin Ave. 2000 sf upfitted. Two bathrooms, kitchen. Elevator. Original oak finishes, windows in all work spaces. Parking garage adjacent. $14 sf. Available April 1. jwarner@ dunganlaw.com 828-2544778, ext. 35
sHort-term rentAls 15 minutes to AsHeville Guest house, vacation/short term rental in beautiful country setting. • Complete with everything
full-time HousekeePer Year-round consistent employment, Asheville. Professional, reliable and experienced preferred for upscale B&B. Must work weekends. References and background check required. No drop-bys. Please call (828) 254-3878 for interview. black walnut bed And breakfast inn. gift & tour ticket sAles Asheville's RED Trolley tour company seeks experienced, outgoing sales clerk for downtown gift shop/ticket sales location. Part-time 3-4 days a week. Send resumes to: debbie@graylineasheville. com www.graylineasheville.com PHone oPerAtors From Home Must have dedicated land line and great voice. 18+ Up to $18 per hour. Flex hours/some Weekends. 1-800-403-7772 Lipservice.net (AAN CAN).
jobs TOUR GUIDE • CDL DRIVers If you are a "people person" you could be a great Tour Guide! Seasonal full and part-time available. Training provided. Must have a Commercial Driver's License (CDL). 828-2518687. firstname.lastname@example.org www.graylineasheville.com wAreHouse oPerAtions Various positions. Asheville Distributor needs several full-time employees to join our expanding shipping and receiving department. We use support systems to process orders and computer skills are desired but not mandatory. The position does require some lifting up to a maximum of 50 lbs. We are looking for candidates that are detailoriented, have a positive attitude, are able to keep up a fast pace and have the potential and desire to advance. • We offer competitive salary, health benefits, paid holiday, personal days and vacation time off as well as A friendly and comfortable work environment. Please email resume and cover letter to jfox@ afgdistribution.com or fax to 828-259-3674.
skilled lAbor/ trAdes AvAilAble Positions MMS and CopyWorks, a growing digital print and mail organization with locations in Asheville and Hendersonville, have fulltime openings for selfmotivated and energetic individuals in both locations. Employees must possess excellent communication and problem solving skills, be detail oriented and able to multitask in a fast paced team environment. general warehouse duties may include unloading/loading freight, long periods of standing, inventory management, machine and forklift operations, and driving. front counter positions include customer service, order processing, answering phones, and operating digital printers and finishing equipment. Industry and professional experience is a plus; proficiency with Microsoft office products suggested. Valid NC Driver’s License
and clean driving record required. Benefits available after 90 day probationary period. Please email resume to email@example.com
AdministrAtive/ office AdministrAtive AssistAnt Red Oak Recovery, a cutting edge substance abuse treatment program for young adults, is in search of a part time administrative assistant. Computer skills and great communication skills are required. Experience in Human Resources is preferred. Must be energetic and willing to work in many areas throughout our large non-smoking campus. Candidates must be team players, be self-driven, and be able to provide 3 references. Please email cover letter and resume to jobs@ redoakrecovery.com executive AssistAnt Asheville, NC. Best-practice, non-profit agency, Community Action Opportunities, seeks an Executive Assistant to support the Children, Family and Community Partnerships Department. This key administrative position performs a variety of complex and often confidential administrative, supervisory, secretarial and recordproducing and management duties. • Requires the ability to independently and accurately prepare, process, track and maintain electronic and hardcopy programmatic, HR and financial detailed records and reports. Also requires the ability to take initiative to prioritize and complete work and special assignments, exercise appropriate judgment, maintain confidentiality, support a variety of department employees and participate on teams as a member or leader. May include supervisory responsibilities. • Work requires extensive knowledge of office operations, detailed program and general agency knowledge. Work also requires the ability to accept and use the Agency Values: Teamwork, Communication, Quality and Respect. • Requires Graduation from a regionally or CHEA accredited business school or community college with coursework in office technology or related field and considerable high-level administrative support experience; comprehensive knowledge of Microsoft Office Suite and a variety of electronic office equipment, ability to use correct grammar, vocabulary and spelling and key a minimum
of 50 wpm. • Must possess or obtain and maintain a Notary Public Certification and a valid North Carolina Driver License. Prefer experience working in Early Childhood or Head Start programs and bi-lingual in Spanish. • Salary: $34,674 to $45,000, DOQ. • Send resume, cover letter and three work references with complete contact information to: Human Resources Manager, 25 Gaston Street, Asheville, NC 28801 or admin@ communityactionopportunities.org • Incomplete submittals shall be disqualified. For more information about Community Action Opportunities and this position go to: www. communityactionopportunities.org • This position is Exempt from overtime. Open until filled. EOE & DFWP office mAnAger/ bookkeePer Small, lively retail and manufacturing jewelry store seeking an experienced office/production manager and bookkeeper. • Applicant must be a team player, detail oriented and have great communication and computer skills. 30-40 hours weekly with benefits. • Send resume to firstname.lastname@example.org or drop off at 63 Haywood Street, Downtown Asheville. oPener/recePtionist/ office AssistAnt Busy, integrated medical office seeks Opener/Receptionist/Office Assistant. Must be friendly, superdependable, tech-savvy, have good communication skills, and have an interest in holistic health. Previous experience working in an office preferred. 36 hours/ week with medical stipend. $11/hour. Email cover letter, resume, and references to email@example.com
sAles/ mArketing inside sAles We are looking for a full time experienced inside sales employee to join our team. Candidate will be responsible for order entry, customer service, and increasing sales revenue by anticipating customer needs and suggesting new products/ up-selling. Our business is fast paced, so the ideal candidate must be very organized and have strong phone and computer skills. We are looking for someone who is self-motivated, positive, focused, reliable and detail oriented. Previous sales experience is preferred. • Benefits include competitive pay with commission incentives, comfortable atmosphere w/ casual dress, holiday and vacation pay, and great
office hours. Interested parties please fax or email resume and cover letter, Attn: Jacqui fax# 828-2362658 or email: Jacqui@afgdistribution.com
restAurAnt/ food APOLLO FLAME • WAITstAff Full-time. Fast, friendly atmosphere. • Experience required. Apply in person between 2pm4pm, 485 Hendersonville Road. 274-3582. kitcHen mAnAger Established summer camp and small boarding high school program seeks creative, whole-foods Kitchen Manager in a year-round position based in Pisgah Forest, NC. Resume and cover letter: firstname.lastname@example.org by 3/18/14. www.enf.org line cooks Part-time. You must have experience and flexible availability on the weekends. Positions are available now! Accepting applications through www.Snagajob.com buffalo wild wings
AVAILABLE POSITIONS • meridiAn beHAviorAl HeAltH staff Psychiatrist Meridian Behavioral Health Services is a non-profit provider of community mental health services serving nine counties in Western North Carolina. We have an opening for a Psychiatrist providing outpatient care for adults. Our primary office locations are in Waynesville, Sylva, Franklin and Brevard. We are seeking physicians who have interest and experience in community mental health care - treatment of persistent mental illness and addiction. Part of this time could involve providing treatment for opioid addiction in our clinicbased buprenorphine (Suboxone) progam. Minimal call responsibilities. Our locations have qualified for education loan repayment programs. Send CV to: Matthew Holmes, MD email: email@example.com or Joe Ferrara, CEO firstname.lastname@example.org Jackson county qualified mental Health Professional (qmHP) Assertive Community Treatment Team (ACTT). Must have mental health degree and two years experience. For more information contact Becky McKnight, rebekah.mcknight@ meridianbhs.org transylvania county • Multiple positions open for Peer support specialist working within a number of recovery oriented programs within our agency. Being a Peer Support Specialist provides an opportunity for individuals to transform their own personal lived experience with mental health and/or addiction challenges into a tool for inspiring hope for recovery in others. Applicants must demonstrate maturity in their own recovery process, have a valid driver’s license, reliable transportation and have moderate computer skills. For further
information, contact email@example.com. • For further information and to complete an application, visit our website: www.meridianbhs.org/open-positions. html clinicAl director Four Circles Recovery Center, a wilderness substance abuse recovery program for young adults, is seeking a licensed Clinical Director to oversee all clinical aspects of the program and ensure that the program delivers clinical care to clients and families in recovery in a way that maximizes independence and family empowerment. • Duties include recruiting, hiring, and supervision of all clinical staff, facilitating training to all staff, program planning and development, crisis intervention, family program facilitation, maintaining CARF accreditation standards, facilitation of group and family therapy with occasional facilitation of individual therapy, as well as marketing and presenting the program at various conferences and events. • A Master’s Degree or PhD in a behavioral health discipline and licensure in behavioral health required. Supervisory experience and substance abuse treatment experience required. Travel required. Must have strong clinical and interpersonal skills, strong organizational skills and excellent written and verbal communication skills. Wilderness experience preferred. Please send all inquiries to jobs@fourcirclesrecovery. com and reference Clinical Director. clinicAl director Red Oak Recovery, a cutting edge substance abuse treatment program for young adults, is seeking a highly qualified and experienced clinical director. We utilize a holistic approach, blending individual and group therapy, adventure therapy, the 12-steps, nutritional education, family therapy and many other modalities. • Qualified candidates will possess a Doctorate or Master’s degree in a human services field and be licensed in Mental Health Treatment (LPC, LCSW) as well as Substance Abuse Treatment (LCAS, CCS). • Must have a minimum of 5 years acting as supervisor to a clinical team. Working knowledge of the 12 Steps is required. Being comfortable working outdoors is required. Please email cover letter and resume to firstname.lastname@example.org evening, weekend, And overnigHt Positions Must be willing to attend Company trainings and offer personal care. We are seeking professional and dependable in-home CareGivers for our WNC team. www.homeinstead. com/159 lcsw Parkway of Family Preservation Services has a full time position available in our Asheville Office for a fully licensed LCSW. Additional Substance abuse experience or an LCASA or LCAS preferred. Position would require assessment, individual and group therapy. Some evening work may be required. Experience with State funded
consumers and paperwork a plus. FPS offers an excellent salary and benefit package. Send resume to email@example.com looking for full or PArt-time work? We are looking for you. WNC Group Homes provides residential services to people who have Autism and Intellectual Disabilities. Current open part- time positions include M-F, 6am-9/10am and Saturday/Sunday, 9am-9pm. Full-time opening on 2nd shift. More information about WNC Group Homes and employment opportunities can be viewed at www.wncgrouphomes.org • Applications can be mailed or dropped off at 28 Pisgah View Ave, Asheville, NC 28803. medicAl coordinAtor Red Oak Recovery, a young adult Substance Abuse Treatment Program is seeking a qualified, motivated and compassionate individual to fulfill the role of medical coordinator. The medical coordinator is responsible for managing all aspects of client medical care. Applicants should possess great communication skills, organizational skills, be self-directed and work well on a team. Previous experience with prescription medication management in a substance abuse or mental health setting is preferred. EMT or higher medical qualification is required. We offer competitive pay and health benefits. Please submit resumes to firstname.lastname@example.org mentAl HeAltH Positions AvAilAble in HAywood, JAckson, & mAcon counties Looking to fill several positions between now and Aug/ Sept. Licensed/provisional therapists to provide Outpatient, Day Treatment or Intensive In-home services to children/adolescents with mental health diagnoses. Therapists must have current NC therapist license. Also looking for QP/Qualified professionals to provide Intensive In-home or Day Treatment services. QP's must have Bachelor's degree and 2-4 years of experience post-degree with this population (experience required depends on type of degree). Apply by submitting resume to telliot@ jcpsmail.org
offender services cliniciAn The Offender Services Program of MBHS seeks a licensed or licenseeligible clinician in North Carolina to join its Offender Services Program. • Job duties include: conducting risk assessments, co-leading treatment groups, coordinating case management, collaborating with probation and social services, and providing program operational support for both the sexual abuse intervention program (SAIP) and the domestic violence intervention program (DVIP). This is an opportunity to further your experience in a specialty field working with offenders and their non-offending partners in an intensive outpatient setting. This position is located in
Waynesville, NC. • For more information contact Kristin Campbell at Kristin. Campbell@meridianbhs. org or visit our website: www.meridianbhs.org to complete an application. substAnce Abuse recovery guide Substance Abuse Recovery Guide Red Oak Recovery, a young adult Substance Abuse Treatment Program is seeking highly qualified individuals for direct care positions. Recovery Guides work on a rotating 4 day on/3 day off schedule. Treatment takes place in a residential setting with wilderness adventure expeditions. WFR, CSAC, or a degree in a human services field preferred. Personal or professional experience with 12 Step Recovery, Substance Abuse Treatment, Mental Health Treatment and/or Wilderness Therapy is required. We offer competitive pay, health benefits, professional clinical training. Please submit resumes to email@example.com tHerAPeutic foster PArents needed If you are interested in making a difference in the life of a child, and live in the Asheville area, please give me a call. Free training. Call Debbie Smiley (828) 2580031 ext. 348 or debbie. firstname.lastname@example.org
ProfessionAl/ mAnAgement finAnce mAnAger for tHe council on Aging of buncombe county (PArt time) Experience in nonprofit and/or government funding, GAP, Quickbooks and Microsoft Excel required. 25 hours/week. Deadline: April 14, 2014. Submit resume to: ZoeT@ coabc.org. No phone calls. Full job description at: www.coabc.org/about-us/ employment-opportunities.
vice President for business And finAnce/ cfo (Reposted 03/07/2014) Chief Financial Officer of the college is responsible for overall supervision of the business services and all financial operations of the college, and provides strategic oversight for facilities, safety, and risk management. minimum requirements: 1. Bachelor’s Degree in Business, Finance, Accounting, or other applicable degree; 2. Seven years’ progressively responsible experience in financial management (with a Bachelor’s Degree; or five years’ progressively responsible financial management experience with applicable Master’s Degree – see preferred qualifications below); 3. Successful experience in creating budgets and working with highly complex business processes and complex organizations; 4. Community college or higher education work experience related to this position. 5. Supervisory experience, with demonstrated ability to facilitate employee success. Preferred
requirements: 1. Certified Public Accountant Licensure 2. Master’s Degree in Business, Finance, Accounting, or related field. • Application Review Date: March 28, 2014. • Salary Range: $93,732 $117,168; Salary will be based upon education, experience and certifications. • For more details and to submit an application, please go to: https:// abtcc.peopleadmin.com/ postings/2632
a plus. A valid N. C. driver’s license is required. Must pass physical and background checks. • Salary $10.60/hour. • Make application with complete work references and contact information along with DCDEE CRC Qualifying Letter to: Human Resources Manager, 25 Gaston Street,Asheville, NC 28801 or Admin@commuityactionopportunities.org or Fax: (828) 253-6319. Open until filled. EOE and DFWP.
teAcHing/ educAtion HeAd stArt nc Pre-k teAcHer AssistAnt substitute Seeking energetic individual with a desire to work as an early childhood professional in our high quality program. Experience working with pre-school children; performs a variety of support tasks in the teaching and classroom environment in Head Start preschool education centers or classrooms in local school systems; may also work with children with needs, and may be assigned to any classroom as needed to work one-on-one to support routine classroom activities; helps with individual and group teaching activities of preschool age children in a classroom; sets up learning centers, and arrange daily activities. NC Early Childhood Credentials preferred. Must understand the developmental stages and appropriate teaching techniques for pre-school children. Bilingual in Spanish-English
science teAcHer wAnted The Academy at Trails Carolina, an experiential and adventure based therapeutic boarding school for boys grades 9-12 based in Henderson County North Carolina, is seeking a Licensed Science Teacher to join its faculty. Interested applicants should email copies of their resume, teaching license, and references to: nduncan@trailsacademy. com www.trailsacademy. com teAcHing Positions Are you interested in making a difference? Asheville Academy for Girls is currently seeking applicants for these positions: Part-time Physics and/ or chemistry teacher/ tutor; or Part-time special education teacher.
The suitable applicant is someone who has licensure and is a responsible and positive role model. Asheville Academy for Girls is a private therapeutic boarding school for girls ages 10-14. Our beautiful 24-acre campus, located in Weaverville, provides a safe setting for our students to transform their lives. Benefits are offered to full time employees and include health, dental, vision and life insurance as well as holiday pay, vacation and sick leave. EOE. Please send a resume and cover letter to email@example.com No phone calls or walk-ins please. www. ashevilleacademy.com
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Arts/mediA develoPment AssistAnt At cArolinA Public Press (PArt-time) The Development Assistant will implement fundraising strategies in support of Carolina Public Press, a nonprofit online news service providing WNC with unbiased, in-depth and investigative reporting. Details at carolinapublicpress.org/career-opportunities. grAnt mAnAger At AsHeville Art museum Responsible for fundraising efforts to maximize contributed income to support the Museum. Acts as primary grant writer. Minimum five years fundraising experience, significant success in grant writing. Undergraduate degree, computer savvy, excellent verbal and written communication skills. Full details at http://www.ashevilleart. org/about/employmentinternship-program/. visitor services & museum sHoP mAnAger Manages the Museum Shop, gallery security, works with volunteers at the Asheville Art Museum. 3+ years experience, relevant degree, excellent computer and customer service skills, art knowledge and significant retail and management experience. Full description at www.ashevilleart.org/about/employment-internship-program/
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maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
by Rob Brezny
fReewiLL astRoLogy tauRus (aPRiL 20-may 20)
aRies (maRcH 21-aPRiL 19)
sagittaRius (nov. 22-dec. 21)
In Somalia, there's a law that forbids you from putting your used chewing gum on your nose and walking around in public. Fortunately, you don't live there, so it's fine if you want to do that. In fact, I encourage you to go right ahead: You’ll be right in line with the cosmic omens. APRIL FOOL! I lied. You should definitely not take yourself too seriously this week; you should look for opportunities to playfully lose your dignity and razz the status quo. But there are craftier ways to do that than by sticking gum on your nose.
I have coined a new word just for your horoscope this week. It’s “zex,” short for “Zen sex.” Zex is a kind of sex in which your mind is at rest, empty of all thoughts. You breathe slowly and calmly, move slowly and calmly, grunt and moan slowly and calmly. You are completely detached from the sensual pleasure you are experiencing. You have no goals other than the intention to be free of all goals. Zex is the ONLY variety of sex I recommend for you right now, Aries. APRIL FOOL! I lied. Zex may be fine to practice at any other time, but not these days. The style of sex you need most is exuberant, unbridled, expansive and even zany.
To be in strict compliance with cosmic necessity, you should attend a party every day in the coming week. Dance ecstatically, make love abundantly and expose yourself to previously unknown pleasures. Feast on a wide variety of food and drink that introduces you to novel tastes. Make sure you experience record levels of sensual enjoyment, nonstop excitement and dynamic socializing. APRIL FOOL! I'm exaggerating, though just a little. Try doing 70 percent version of what I advised.
gemini (may 21-june 20) Tata Massage is a San Francisco salon that offers an unusual beauty treatment: faceslapping. The Thai masseuse named Tata claims to be improving your complexion as she smacks your cheeks and forehead with her hands. She also does "massage boxing," in which she administers health-giving punches to your body with her fists. Is there a comparable service available where you live? I highly recommend it. APRIL FOOL! I lied. Here's the truth: You should be absolutely firm that you won't tolerate whacks and wallops — including the psychological kind — even if they’re supposedly good for you. canceR (june 21-juLy 22) Now would be an excellent time to launch a new tradition, initiate a fresh trend, or make a beautiful thing that will last 1,000 years. I'm talking about an amazing marvel or useful innovation or unique creation that will improve the lives of countless humans all over the planet for the next 40 generations. APRIL FOOL! I was exaggerating a bit. Producing something that will last 1,000 years is too ambitious. How about if you simply launch a new tradition or a fresh trend or create a beautiful thing that will last for the rest of your long life — an amazing marvel or useful innovation or unique creation that will continue to teach and amuse you all along the way? Leo (juLy 23-aug. 22) Your patron saint for the next three months is surrealist artist Salvador Dali. Regard him as your muse and role model. In fact, you might want to spout some of his famous declarations as if they were your own. Start with these: 1) "The only difference between me and a madman is that I am not mad." 2) "I do not take drugs; I am drugs." 3) "Mistakes are almost always of a sacred nature." 4) "Have no fear of perfection. You'll never reach it." APRIL FOOL! I lied. Salvador Dali is your patron saint, role model, and muse for only the next 14 days, not three months. viRgo (aug. 23-sePt. 22) You know how Jesus could supposedly turn water into wine? Well, St. Brigit, a sixthcentury Irish nun, was legendary for an even 62
maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
greater miracle. When visitors came to her monastery in Kildare, she changed her old bath water into beer for them to drink. I think there's a good chance you’ll develop that precise talent sometime soon. APRIL FOOL! I kind of lied. You won't really possess St. Brigit's supernatural power. However, you will have an uncanny ability to make transmutations that are almost as dramatic as changing bath water into beer. LibRa (sePt. 23-oct. 22) The band Rush was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame last May. Guitarist Alex Lifeson delivered an unusual two-minute acceptance speech, endlessly repeating one word: "blah." "Blah-blahblah," he began. "Blah-blah-blah blah-blah blah-blah." Many hand gestures and shifting vocal inflections accompanied his rap, always in support of variations on "blahblah." This is the spirit you should bring to all of your important conversations in the coming week. APRIL FOOL! I lied. In fact, the opposite is true. It's crucial for you to speak very precisely and articulately in the coming week. Say exactly what you mean. Don't rely on meaningless BS like "blah-blah." scoRPio (oct. 23-nov. 21) When a human embryo begins to develop in the womb, the very first body part that appears is — can you guess? — the anus. This scientific fact led the witty commentators at QI.com to declare that "Every human being starts out as an asshole." They were making a joke, of course, hinting that every one of us has an unattractive quality or two that make us at least a little bit of a jerk. That's the bad news, Scorpio. The good news is that you now have an unprecedented chance to transform those aspects of your personality. APRIL FOOL! I lied. You're not an asshole, not even a little bit. But it’s true that the coming weeks will be an excellent time to try to fix or at least modulate your least attractive qualities.
caPRicoRn (dec. 22-jan. 19) Lifehacker.com has a step-by-step guide to setting up your home as a command center where you can pursue your plans for world domination. The article provides advice on how to build a surveillance system, encrypt your computer files and prepare for blackouts and weather emergencies. Do it, Capricorn! Get the lowdown at bit.ly/secretlair. APRIL FOOL! I lied. You don't really need to create a high-tech fortress. But you would be wise to make your home into more of an ultra-comfortable, super-inspiring sanctuary — a place where you feel so safe and strong and smart that you will always have total power over yourself, and never feel driven to fulfill anyone’s standards of success but your own. aquaRius (jan. 20-feb. 18) The planetary omens suggest that you need to experience all possible flavors of Doritos corn chips. Here's the problem: The place where you live offers only a limited range. That's why I urge you to drop everything and travel to Japan, the world leader in Dorito variety. There you can sample coconut curry-flavored Doritos, along with fried chicken, corn soup, smoked bacon, tuna and mayonnaise, and many others. Buy your plane ticket now! APRIL FOOL! I lied. The truth is, you will benefit from communing with a wide variety of sensations and experiences and ideas in many areas of your life, not just Doritos. Pisces (feb. 19-maRcH 20) According to a survey by Public Policy Polling, 4 percent of the population believes that "shape-shifting reptilian people control our world by taking on human form and gaining political power to manipulate our societies." My own research suggests that 62 percent of those believers are Pisceans. Are you one? If so, now is a good time to intensify your fight against the shape-shifting reptilian people. APRIL FOOL! I lied. In fact, I strongly encourage you NOT to feed your paranoid delusions and fearful reveries. This should be a time when you bolster your positive fantasies, constructive visions and inspiring dreams.
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tHe new yoRk times cRosswoRd PuzzLe
ACROSS 1 Crumples (up) 5 Word of comparison 9 Destroy, as hopes 13 Drop 14 Relatives of Yodels 16 Object of ancient Egyptian veneration 17 Work written between “Typee” and “Mardi” 18 “Maria ___,” 1941 #1 hit 19 Vivacious 20 Overly bold member of the “Little Women” family? 23 Salinger’s “For ___ – With Love and Squalor” 24 Granola bar ingredients 26 “No seats left,” in short
29 Result of bankruptcy? 34 “Hungry hungry” game creatures 36 Schlep 37 Siouan tribe 38 Turn away 39 See 11-Down 40 Jewish deli offering 41 Thinker Descartes 42 Intellectual range 43 Nod’s meaning, maybe 44 What blood donors do? 47 “___ fancy you consult, consult your purse”: Franklin 48 Some summer wine 49 Dueling implement 51 Motivational words for a boss at layoff time?
No.0219 Edited by Will Shortz
57 “___ that sweet?” 60 Part of LED 61 One might run Lion or Leopard 62 Squeakers 63 Bob of “Full House” 64 Metaphor for punishment 65 Spur 66 Actor Coleman or Oldman 67 World’s fair
DOWN 1 Pound sound 2 What might go on a belt 3 Parisian house of design 4 Vermont winter destination 5 Lunchbox accessory 6 Variety of poker 7 “Pardon the interruption …” 8 Singer Hendryx ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE 9 “Oy” or “ow” A T O Z B A R B G O N E R 10 Japanese P.M. Shinzo ___ C O D Y toBPrevious B O Y OPuzzle R O N O Answer 11 With 39-Across I D I G C H A T T E R B O X and 58-Down, D O N O W O N E R S E R I response to a S H ET EE SA HR N E I P SA IL TI M E military command S H A R P E I I N D I A N A H A K E E M E X G O V 12 F.D.R.’s third veep T U R N I N G T H E T R I C K I C I A M I D F O N D U 15 Tahitian garb D I A P T A H O I G A R M E N T D I S T R I C T 21 Fancy necktie T K O S N E L L P O S H I K E S G E N L S O N 22 Archipelago C L I C T O T I E O V I D constituent, A E R OI C RI OE AR S T U RN SE IV NE E maybe PT RI AI M N MO IS N G T LH EE AT HR E E 25 Much of “The O R K E ER KE U S EA Y JE O H N Q Daily Show” and K R A DT EE LC H OOL PE LS US AT U “The Colbert M A A C EI N O LT IE Z EL EMNA OL A OC MH NI I Report” D O DS II N E D A L E X M E A N 26 Quick L I C O N A G E D O U T 27 “Cry me a ___” T E L L I N G T H E T R U T H The first letters of the answers to the 13 S U I clues T E T H Afrom N A to E M; R the I E last 28 First game of the italicized proceed season X E S Sbackward H U N Tfrom M S N. N letters proceed Z to 30 Joint assemblies
edited by Will Shortz
PUZZLE BY MICHAEL DEWEY
31 Vienna’s land: Abbr. 32 Schlemiel 33 Titter 35 Like much media mail 39 “And ___ it moves” (what Galileo allegedly said in reference to the earth)
53 What might get you through a quiet stretch? 42 Works, as dough 54 Kind of screen 55 Potential flu 43 Ungodly display symptom 45 Suffix with many 56 Effect of a yodel, country names perhaps 46 Kindle or Nook 57 Rapscallion 50 I.R.S. submission 58 See 11-Down 52 TV meas. 59 Sgt., e.g. 40 Casey of “American Top 40”
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maRcH 26 - aPRiL 2, 2014
Published on Mar 24, 2014