Mountain Xpress 03.12.14

O U R 2 0 T H Y E A R O F W E E K LY I N D E P E N D E N T N E W S , A R T S & E V E N T S F O R W E S T E R N N O R T H C A R O L I N A V O L . 2 0 N O . 3 4 M A R C H 1 2 - M A R C H 1 8 , 2 0 1 4

CHEERS

beer section expands coverage, p. 36

ST. PATRICK’S DAY

events around WNC, p. 38

Mac Swicegood

Mike Summey

Patty Beaver

PORTRAIT Mike Plemmons

John Carroll

OF

CIBO

Council of Independent Business Owners wields political might MountAinx.CoM

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Carpentry

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Portrait of CIBO

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Mac Swicegood

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PORTRAIT Mike Plemmons

John Carroll

OF

CIBO

Since its founding in the late 1980s, the Council of Independent Business Owners has been one of the most influential grassroots groups in Buncombe County. Xpress talked to many of its members, its critics and those who dealt with the group.

COVER design Laura Barry Caricatures Randy Molton

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NEWS

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12 party fund Buncombe commissioner approve Moogfest funding on party-line vote

wellness-related events/news to mxhealth@mountainx.com. venues with upcoming shows clubland@mountainx.com

Pay what you can

Wed. March 19 When Vanda arrives soaked from the rain and late to audition for a play based on a nineteenthcentury erotic novel, the director, Thomas, is less than thrilled. The reading quickly turns into a tango for dominance between the young actress and the director. An electrifying game of cat and mouse ensues. This smart, sexy comedy was nominated for a Tony Award for Best Play.

wellness

Tickets: $14-$30 Students: $10

24 rebuilding dreams Family Support Network of WNC helps parents of children with special needs

FOOD

March 19 - April 13

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30 not so fast Slow-cooker classes promote healthy eating

A&E

STARRING: WILLIE REPOLEY AND HANNAH SLOAT

14 judgment day Survey evaluates local judges; Clontz faces primary challenge

38 Shamrock shake-up St. Patrick’s Day happenings in and around Asheville

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42 conflict resolution Asheville’s Knives and Daggers on the art of dichotomy

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OPINION

Send your letters to the editor to letters@mountainx.com.

STAFF

publisher: Jeff Fobes ASSISTANT TO THE PUBLISHER: Susan Hutchinson MANAGING editor: Margaret Williams a&E editor/writer: Alli Marshall

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food editor/writer: Gina Smith editorial assistants: Hayley Benton, Grady Cooper, Carrie Eidson, Jake Frankel, Lea McLellan

Amazing colors to choose from

MOVIE REVIEWER & COORDINATOR: Ken Hanke contributing editors: Peter Gregutt, Rob Mikulak, Tracy Rose

CARTOON BY RANDY MOLTON

Support Williams for district attorney The first time I met Todd Williams was in front of the Asheville Brewing Co. on Coxe Avenue about eight years ago. He was on one of his many bike rides through downtown, and we chatted about cycling and beer – two topics near and dear to our hearts.

Over the years I’ve come to know Todd as a man of high integrity and intelligence. Unlike the incumbent, Todd has a streak of intellectual curiosity that allows him to fully research, internalize and act confidently on complex issues. Williams wants to refocus the district attorney’s office – and he has the knowledge and background to make it happen.

Todd stood up for the working poor as a public defender and has a proven track record of commitment to fighting for the most vulnerable in our society. There is no doubt he will stand up for us as DA and restore fairness and integrity to that office.

— Paul Van Heden Asheville

Elevator operator left out In the Mountain Xpress, an article was published by writer Kristin D’ Agostino [“Going Up?” Feb. 19] about the elevator in the Flatiron Building in which she only mentions or refers

to three of its four elevator operators.

Neil Mobberly works the morning shift ... and Brian Moretti works the night shift only when the Skybar is opened during its season from March to October. Pete DeAnna is not a regular elevator operator [and works for] the Skybar. The Flatiron Building has another elevator operator covering the late evening shift, from 1:00 p.m. to 5:30 p.m. Both Neil Mobberly and [me], who work the afternoon shift hours, are permanent staff.

I don’t know if this is a nice published fantasy article or a real and true story of the elevator operators in the Flatiron Building. If I’m clear, the information provided is incorrect or missing a testimonial of “accurate information,” which can hurt feelings or darken an otherwise reliable article.

Many people have asked me about it. “The article is terrible!” they say.

“They eliminated any mention of you in it.” Thanks for such beautiful and unfinished story.

— Enier Cruz Elevator operator, Flatiron building Asheville Editors’ and writer’s response: Our apologies for not including Mr. Cruz in the article, which was based on a summer visit last year.

Downtown needs more

REGULAR contributORS: Jonathan Ammons, Sharon Bell, Mark Bennett, Michael Carlebach, Jesse Farthing, Michael Franco, Alicia Funderburk, Steph Guinan, Jayson Im, Nick King, Elizabeth Reynolds McGuire, Max Miller, Nathan Metcalf, Thom O’Hearn, Mary Pembleton, Kim Ruehl, Kyle Sherard, Toni Sherwood, Katie Souris, Justin Souther, Haley Steinhardt, Micah Wilkins Art & Design ManaGeR: Megan Kirby GRAPHIC DesignERs: Laura Barry, Lori Deaton AdVERTISING MANAGER: Susan Hutchinson MARKETING ASSOCIATES: Nichole Civiello, Bryant Cooper, Jordan Foltz, Tim Navaille, Aiyanna Sezak-Blatt, Kenneth Trumbauer, John Varner Information Technologies Manager: Stefan Colosimo web TEAM: Kyle Kirkpatrick, Brad Messenger

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OPINION

Send your letters to the editor to letters@mountainx.com.

CARTOON BY BRENT BROWN

grocery stores We have all these new grocery stores opening in Asheville, yet we have NO grocery stores for the residents in the Downtown Business District. The French Broad Food Co-Op and Amazing Savings [recently renamed Hopey & Co.] are too far to walk and too close to drive and find parking. This affect’s Battery Park residents, Vanderbilt Apartments, 60 Haywood, 39 Castanea, 21 Haywood, Kress Condo’s, S&W Condo’s ... shall I continue? We pay the highest taxes and parking fees and get the least services.

— Paul Monitto Asheville

Kudos to Xpress’ award-winning designers

1000 MerriMon Avenue, Asheville, nC - (828) 254-2771 www.skiCountrysports.com 6

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I was pleased to see the announcement on your website that Xpress won four North Carolina Press Association awards this year and the accompanying article in your March 5 issue [“Xpress wins four North Carolina Press Awards”].

Congratulations to the current and former Xpress writers who won.

However, I am disappointed that

Xpress has made no mention that two of its former graphic designers also won a total of four awards in the NCPA 2013 Best Ad Contest. Former Ad Design and Prepress Coordinator John Zara won first place for Best Color Restaurant/Entertainment Ad, first place for Best Color Retail Ad and third place for Best Advertising Campaign.

Former Graphic Designer Sarah Riddle won first place for Best Color Home Furnishings and Appliances Ad. Given the ample print and online coverage of the other awards won this year, it’s obvious that Xpress values the recognition of the NCPA. So I’m not sure why you have chosen not to acknowledge the Best Ad Contest winners. Aside from the fact that you should congratulate your staff, past and present, for quality work, it seems in Xpress’ financial interest to recognize awards for outstanding quality in advertising design.

I hope that Xpress will correct this error and afford all of its award winners the same level of recognition.

— Carrie Lare Former Xpress Art & Design Manager Asheville Editors’ response: Thank you, Ms. Lare, for reminding us. We’ve published the news online and in this issue.

Asheville under glass The F heard ‘round the (yoga) world

By the end of class, my body parts were definitely talking.

They were swearing and hollering, too.

colleen kelly mellor

ckmellor@cox.net

I just finished my fourth yoga class (really my third, since I unceremoniously bolted from my first class).

I crawled to the get-ready-to-leave bench, still part of this yoga school’s $60-for-30-days special, whereby the business hopes to hook me as part of its new generation of yoga diehards.

But I’m exhausted. I simply can’t believe this thing is so hard.

Our instructor for this class is different from the others. He started out telling us that the class was for beginners but not to be fooled: “Beginner Yoga doesn’t mean it’s easy.” Since I want Easy Yoga, I make a mental note to look that up in the school’s online schedule.

Next, he goes into the meaning of dialogue, saying, “conversation happens when one’s body parts talk to each other.” Unlike my other teachers, he doesn’t play any soothing music. He probably wanted to facilitate us in hearing our bodies talk. I’ll say this: By the end of class, my body parts were definitely talking. They were swearing and hollering, too, even using the F word, as in, “What the F are we doing here with a bunch that was obviously raised on this pablum?”

So, I dialogued back with my body and tried to give it some insight. Here’s what I said: “I think I finally know why yoga’s so hard for us. First off, we’ve got MS, so we’re not on a level playing field with others. Our muscles scream when extended, and they’re decidedly weaker than others.

“Next, we’re dyslexic, so every time we nail a position (and we’re proud), yoga teacher takes away our glory and calls out, meanly, to reverse the position. We get all mixed up.

“Then, too, we react slowly to drill-sergeant commands. Yoga instructors always call out commands. We especially liked it (sarcastic) when today’s guru had us hold a tough pose, and then forgot about us while he gave a 14-yearold boy his personal attention and

encouragement.” That’s when we (my body and I) dropped down on our mat the quivering in our legs took on spastic proportions.

“Finally,” I continue, “at 67, we’re older, so movements once fluid are staccato at best, impossible at worst.”

What did we enjoy? When someone farted. It had to happen, with all of this stretching and exposing bodies to openness. We knew not to dissolve into hysteria, for we needed to conserve energy, if for no other reason than to stagger out at the end of class in some kind of upright position.

But the veiled fart was the first Real Funny Thing that’s happened in Yoga Town. Following class, we met our first yoga friend, Lisa, who told us that this is her third year in Beginner Yoga. We were stunned.

That’s when we realized, yoga’s not

like other schools. We won’t necessarily be in the Slow Learners’ Group.

We know, too, that there’s no shame being in Beginner Yoga, maybe forever. Even so, we’re looking up Easy Yoga.

Now, if we can just hobble on out to our car ...

P.S.: For those of you who recommended (in the comment section), after my first yoga column, classes sensitive to MS people (like me), thank you. Special thanks, too, to the yoga instructor who hunted me down, got my address, and sent me video tapes (gratis) on yoga for the physically challenged. I’ll watch and follow Bedtop Yoga (even better than Easy Yoga), Seated Yoga and Balance Basics. She considers me an experiment, and I’ll willingly oblige.

Colleen Kelly Mellor (ckmellor@cox. net) came to Asheville seven years ago for a quieter lifestyle, but that didn’t happen. On a mountain road, three years ago, her husband was hit head-on by a 12-year-old girl in a truck. He “died” following surgery (staff shocked him back to life), and they’ve been crawling back ever since.

In this column, Mellor opines on life in Western North Carolina as only the “born again” can do. Published in The Wall Street Journal, among others, Mellor adds her senior view of a region often touted as one of America’s “Best Retirement Towns.” X

Service. Courtesy. Integrity. mountainx.com

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POrtraIt Of Mac Swicegood

CIBO

Mike Plemmons

Mike Summey

Council of Independent Business Owners rallies asheville’s business community story and photos by haylEy BEntOn and JEssE farthIng Caricatures by ranDy MOltOn The Council of Independent Business Owners has been called a lot of things over the years. nan Chase’s 2007 book, Asheville: A History, describes CIBO as “an activist coalition of generally anti-government business owners” who “wrested power from the civic leaders” in the early ’90s. Indeed, few could argue that the nonprofit — whose members serve on such powerful public bodies as Asheville’s City Council and Planning and Zoning Commission, the Western North Carolina Regional Air Quality Agency’s board and the Buncombe County Board of Commissioners — lacks influence. But how far does it reach? And does the group still have the kind of impact that it did in the past?

Executive Director Mike plemmons, who’s been with CIBO since shortly after its founding in 1987, is one of only two full-time employees. “I’ve been called everything from angel to Darth Vader,” he says. “We’re never going to make everybody totally happy. We’re not in the business to make everybody happy. We’re in a business to work for business, and that’s what we do.”

Some might say that CIBO’s agenda is as secret as its membership list, but staffer patty beaver says the group operates under four basic tenets aimed at promoting awareness as well as activism.

“We educate our business owners about the way local government works and its effect on local businesses,” explains Beaver, who’s been with the organization for 24 years. “Secondly, we act as a conduit for the flow of business and government. We work to make Asheville and Buncombe County a better place to do business, and the last thing is we encourage business owners to serve on boards and commissions — get involved in their communities and make it a better place to be.”

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Longtime community organizer Monroe gilmour of the Swannanoa Valley Alliance for Beauty and Prosperity sharply disputes that assessment, however, declaring, “I think they block out of their minds the many important contributions government makes in the lives of our citizens. The society that would result from their being in total charge would seem to me to be barren and eventually unworkable.”

stEErIng PuBlIC POlICy CIBO’s aggressive approach to getting its members elected or appointed to public bodies whenever there’s an opening has often raised the ire of Asheville’s more left-leaning activist community.

The nonprofit’s roughly 230 members, Beaver is quick to add, don’t all share the same political and social ideals. “It’s really a mix of all different kinds of perspectives,” she says. “One of the things about business owners that I’ve learned over the years is that it doesn’t matter what side of an issue you’re on. When you’re dealing with a very specific business issue, the ground is level. … You can be the most conservative person in the world or the most liberal person in the world; when you come together on a business issue, all that is set aside. And that’s really healthy, and that’s why CIBO has been so successful over the years. … They’re all in it to make Asheville a better place for business at the end of the day.”

Founder Mike summey says CIBO was formed in response to neighborhood groups that the business community saw as “obstructionist.” Summey, however, was battling the city over a proposed sign ordinance, and many saw CIBO as merely part of that fight.

“That was the common perception of people,” he says, “simply because at the time, I was in the sign business, and the city was enacting another sign ordinance. … But that was never the intent of it.

“Whenever the business community wanted to expand, build, put in new development, what have you, there was always this core of neighborhood coalition groups that were opposing whatever they wanted to do.”

Summey says he and 11 like-minded business owners — hoteliers, restaurateurs, developers, car dealers and so on — came together to combat what he called a “whole Council chamber of people opposing” expansion and development.

Barbara Field, who served on City Council from 1991 to 2001 but was never affiliated with CIBO, says the group “wasn’t so much against things as much as they wanted to have control over regulation. ... The Asheville neighborhood associations — even though they had very strong, positive things they wanted to do with the community — they were always against something.”

Longtime CIBO member Jerry Sternberg cites a number of historical factors that spurred the group’s activities in the early years: a small circle of elite, wealthy power brokers who belonged to the Biltmore Forest Country Club and were used to running things; a Chamber of Commerce that began tilting more toward tourism rather than recruiting industry that would pay better wages; a newly formed Economic Development Commission with the same bias; and the passage of the city’s Unified Development Ordinance, put together by people who “wanted to make it very restrictive and wanted all the power they could have to control, and it really stifled business interests here,” Sternberg asserts.

“There’s a whole body of people ... who really don’t want to see anything happen in Asheville. They’ve got theirs, and they really don’t care whether new business comes in or not. A lot of them come from up North, and … once their house gets built, they don’t want anybody else to come down here.”

Against that backdrop, says Sternberg, who initially served on the Economic Development Commission, CIBO was a way to keep the broader business community informed.

“We had a representative within every committee meeting or city agency or county agency that would report back to the members,” the developer recalls. “If some ridiculous ordinance … was coming up, [our members] at least — way before it ever got to City Council — could say, ‘Wait a minute! How ridiculous is this?’ so [we] kill it before it ever gets out of the committee.”

Field, however, says, “I think that if you were on the neighborhood side, you probably saw CIBO as having much more influence than I did: They didn’t change my mind on anything.”

“What we’re all looking for is the bottom line: Not only to help your business but to help the area you live in.”

Longtime CIBO member Mac Swicegood

“I’ve been called everything from angel to Darth Vader. We’re not in the business to make everybody happy.”

CIBO Executive Director Mike Plemmons

Ever vigilant The group’s first step, says Sternberg, was encouraging local businesspeople to become part of the process. “That’s been a huge success,” he maintains, adding, “There’s more than one viewpoint. … There are spokesmen on both sides, which is a balance.”

Regulations, stresses Sternberg, must be reasonable, and CIBO lobbies for the good of the city and county. “What we are is active, interested and ever vigilant,” he declares.

The group’s regular breakfast and luncheon meetings feature guest presentations which, together with the weekly newsletter, “allow businesspeople to get concise information — accurate information — in a very busy schedule,” says founding member Mac Swicegood, a property appraiser and real estate agent. “And that information is helpful: It saves you dollars. … I don’t know where else you could get that information in such a concise format, in a minimal amount of time.

“What we’re all looking for,” he continues, “is the bottom line: Not only to help your business but to help the area you live in. It opened a lot of people’s eyes on how to be involved in their communities, and it gave them an opportunity. So if they had a problem they could either put up or shut up.”

Asheville City Council member Cecil Bothwell has had his share of differences with the group. “They tend to cast me as some sort of extreme liberal, and they are, if anything, extreme conservatives, so it’s just a different worldview,” he observes. Nonetheless, Bothwell commends CIBO for tracking local issues. “Frankly, I’m glad that they inform their members what we’re doing. It would be nice if more organizations tuned in.”

And CIBO member David Gantt, who is chairman of the Buncombe County Board of Commissioners, says, “I’m in a lot of groups. I think it’s important for an elected official to hear the whole gambit of opinions in Buncombe County, so you make good decisions and have good information to make those decisions.”

It’s the membership City planner Joe Minicozzi of Urban3, a private consulting firm, says CIBO’s newsletters sway hard to the right, with Plemmons’ own viewpoint evident throughout.

Minicozzi, who also serves on Asheville’s Planning and Zoning Commission, says that while he sees eye to eye with CIBO members on important development issues such as the controversial Interstate 26 connector, he and the organization’s board have different ideas about how to get the long-delayed project done, causing Plemmons to paint him in a less than flattering light in the group’s newsletters. After Minicozzi voiced support for a billboard ban in March of 2012, for example, the newsletter reported: “We appreciate Minicozzi’s efforts and were unaware that he is now a billboard ban expert. Since his previous efforts have been to modernize the I-26 connector construction which — due largely to his efforts — may be built in 35-40 years if the project is on the fast track.”

Seeking a plan for the connector that would have less impact on adjacent neighborhoods,

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“I think they block out of their minds the many important contributions government makes. The society that would result from their being in total charge would ... be barren and eventually unworkable.”

Monroe Gilmour, swannanoa valley alliance for beauty and prosperity

Minicozzi says he made upward of 200 presentations to community groups, but when he showcased his ideas at a CIBO breakfast, he was “chewed out” by Swicegood.

“I think they were just thinking we’re in there to stop the project,” Minicozzi observes. “They were pissed. But I agree with them: It shouldn’t take so long to get that stupid connection done. It’s absolutely stupid.

“In a way, I empathize with CIBO and their ‘get the project done’ attitude,” he continues. “But when a CIBO member yelled at me at a meeting, I was kind of turned off by that. … We have to make sure this project is done right. We’re not here to stop the project or get in the way of the project: We’re here to make sure the community isn’t impacted.

“There are people in that organization that get it,” he asserts. “But far too often, what ends up happening is if you’re not in people’s clubs — for some reason, because I’m not in CIBO’s club, they think I’m a hippie or something. Look, I build cities for a living. This is what I do.”

Another CIBO member, Minicozzi notes, is David Brown, this area’s representative on the influential state Board of Transportation.

“That’s where it gets muddy,” Minicozzi continues. “This is how CIBO likes to operate. It’s nothing illegal: They’re being smart about it. They put themselves in positions of power” and can then try to influence public policy decisions. But those decisions, he maintains, are really being made by a very select group: the organization’s board of directors.

Swicegood, however, says, “The power is in the membership, and how committed they are to wanting something to change. CIBO itself doesn’t have any power at all — it’s just the people who are involved.”

A powerful board

Political activist Steve Rasmussen says he’s researched the organization extensively. “You talk to the rank-and-file CIBO members, and they really are all over the spectrum,” he says. “But that doesn’t matter, because those 230 members don’t have any say in what the CIBO leadership does.”

As evidence of CIBO’s indifference toward the small businesses they purport to represent, Rasmussen, a former Xpress reporter, cites the group’s vehement support for the Tunnel Road Wal-Mart Supercenter during a bitter 2002 fight to get the massive project approved.

“Because Wal-Mart, obviously, they come in and out go the small businesses.

Well, CIBO didn’t care about the small businesses. They were absolutely, vocally, vociferously advocating on behalf of Wal-Mart at every meeting. CIBO is to the Chamber of Commerce here as the tea party is to the GOP,” Rasmussen asserts.

“They’re the extremists.”

“Listen, most city managers, most county managers work for the number of votes that’s the majority,” Plemmons points out. “There are 13 members on my board. If

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seven of them come in and say, ‘It’s going to go this way,’ that’s the way it’s going to go. I work for a board; they work for a board.”

CIBO’s board of directors contains several familiar names. Jan Davis is an Asheville City Council member; Karl Koon and Vonna Cloninger serve on the WNC Regional Air Quality Agency’s board.

“It runs just like any other organization,” Plemmons continues. “I am not beholden to anybody except my membership. … My members support me and Patty, not the government. Does that make us anti-government? It may on some issues. It may make us pro-government for something that they are passing or considering. We are fiercely independent in the best possible way.”

Community spirit Gilmour, echoing Rasmussen’s sentiments, says, “I think the community reacted to CIBO, when it started, the way many people reacted to the tea party’s launch. Both organizations seemed angry, anti-government and intent on getting their way. They seemed so wedded to their idea of the free-market system that working in collaboration or trying to make a better community appeared an anathema to them.

“As a community organizer, I’ve had to confront government policy many times,” notes Gilmour. “But it’s with a sense of working to make that government better — with a sense that government is truly of the people and is working for us.

“On the other hand, CIBO, like the tea party, appears to me to simply want government eliminated or totally in its pocket. To me, both organizations lack a sense of community spirit.”

Many CIBO members dispute that assessment. “I think our community is a whole lot better because of the Council of Independent Business Owners than it ever would have been,” Swicegood declares.

CIBO’s greatest hit The group’s greatest accomplishment, says Summey, came in 1993, when four CIBO-backed candidates — a voting majority — were elected to City Council. Hours after being sworn in, they voted to fire City Manager Doug Bean; in response, an opposition movement tried to unseat those Council members.

“A recall petition just kept slamming these Council members for why they fired the city manager, who was well thought of,” says Summey. “But … in the process of running the city, he was doing things that were totally not right.”

While researching the city budget, Summey asserts, he found a check written for a police car that actually went to the Planning Department. “There was no asset management to find out where things were going,” Summey says.

The well-connected opposition group, he continues, made it hard to get both sides of the story heard.

“There were stories in the paper about how bad these councilmen were,” he explains. “But there were never stories put out about these things that I’m talking

“A lot of times, people in government make decisions without any input from the business community, and they have no idea what the unintended consequences of their decisions are.”

CIBO FOUNDING member John Carroll

about. If Council takes that action, and that action is being portrayed as unfair — unless you’ve got a way of getting out the real reason behind it, the message from the other side stays there.”

The recall petition, says Rasmussen, “didn’t succeed, but none of those guys got reelected, so in the long run it did succeed.” Amid general uproar, a competing recall petition targeted Field and Mayor Russ Martin, who had opposed Bean’s firing.

The CIBO-dominated Council then appointed Jim Westbrook city manager. Rasmussen describes Westbrook as “pro-development, anti anything else.”

“When they finally replaced [Westbrook], they had to do a much more public process, with the whole city weighing in,” continues Rasmussen. “And then they got Gary Jackson in.

“Since then, almost all the big stuff the city does, they do with public process. They found that really works well to get a diversity of voices and not be dominated by CIBO. Now they can say, ‘Yeah, we’ve got some CIBO members on these focus groups, but we’ve also got some activists.’”

changing influence?

Some observers say CIBO’s impact on local politics has declined over the last 10 years or so.

“My impression is that they had quite a bit of influence some years ago and that, as their membership has aged, their influence has waned,” says Bothwell. “I think their day has passed. I really think their core group is aging out of active participation.”

Minicozzi, though, doesn’t see it. “I think they’re still active; I think they’re laying low,” he suggests. “They do have legitimate beefs. I actually see eye to eye with them on 40 percent of what they talk about. That’s what kills me: I can understand them.

“They can have a voice, but they don’t need to be the voice. We need to have a process where everybody gets heard. Let the community decide where we need to go.”

For his part, Plemmons acknowledges that things have changed, saying it was “definitely a different day in the early days of CIBO. We’re more directed toward issues and laws that will impact membership,” he explains. “At the beginning, it was pretty much everything that could affect business. Now it’s directed to individual ordinances that may have an effect on some of our members.

“We are in the trenches,” he notes. “We’re having to deal with a lot of people who are visionary and a lot of people that don’t want to change, but unfortunately, they are going to have to change no matter who they are. We’ve changed over the years.

“It’s not so much about the numbers [of members and putting them in positions of power] as it is trying to make sense of what you’re doing.”

As for CIBO’s impact on the community, Plemmons says he thinks City Council knows more about small businesses’ needs than they did in the past and that individual elected officials tend to pay more attention to budgets now, making Asheville a better place for businesses.

Gantt, too, says, “I think CIBO has been very effective at getting their message across.

They are one of the more aggressive groups; many times we didn’t see eye to eye.”

Gilmour, on the other hand, says CIBO “used a take-no-prisoners approach, which was intimidating to many people, but it was almost like standing up to a bully. ... They end up, to me, looking fairly shallow and ineffective. I think if they had been successful we would not have the kind of City Council we’ve had for the last 10 years.”

Rasmussen agrees.

“I used to think of Asheville as this butterfly enclosed in this really hard chrysalis, trying really hard to break out,” he says. “But this conservative, right-wing chrysalis really held it tight. It’s only been in the last 15 years, tops, that there’s been any kind of a crack in that shell of concealed and consolidated power.”

Field, meanwhile, says, “I never saw them as ‘the big, bad CIBO’; I saw them as a group of people with an agenda. They weren’t scary to me. ... I think it’s a perception of CIBO that is much stronger than the reality.”

Plemmons, understanding this perception, adds, “Some people fear us a little bit. Some people want to kick us around a little bit. That’s just the way it is. … Some people disagree with business. Some people don’t want business. We get it — we’re going to have people that love us and people that don’t love us. And you just go on.

“It’s been a great place to work, really. It’s demanding, the hours can be very long, but it’s rewarding.” In the end, he says, “I really get a feel for the community.” X

mountainx.com

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

11

NEWS

by Jake Frankel

jfrankel@mountainx.com

251-1333 ext. 115

@JakeFrankel

Party fund Buncombe commissioners approve Moogfest funding on party-line vote

Buncombe County commissioners voted along party lines March 4 to approve $90,000 for Moogfest.

The music and innovation festival requested the county funding to help produce the event, which will run April 23-27 at venues across Asheville.

Moog Music and Moogfest President Mike Adams said the event will be a major economic boon to the area — to the tune of $30 million. He estimates that it will bring in $238,000 in tax revenue, more than paying back

the county grant. The company is investing about $3 million in the festival, he said.

After three years of partnering with renowned concert promoter AC Entertainment, Moogfest is taking a different direction this year to emphasize more than music. The festival will include a job fair and other events focused on cultivating the local creative technology sector and economic development. And with 52 percent of ticket buyers making an average yearly income of more than $100,000, Adams said, “We’ve accomplished our objective of attracting the right people to this event.”

He projects that the five-day festival will fill 34,000 hotel room nights with attendees. The county investment will help the festival be a major catalyst for local jobs and creative industry, he said.

Creative impact: Organizers are pitching Moogfest as more than a music festival, estimating the five days of concerts, educational panels and other events will pump $30 million into the local economy.

Photo by David Simchock

All four of the Democrats on the Commission expressed strong support: Board Chair David Gantt, Vice Chair Ellen Frost and Commissioners Holly Jones and Brownie Newman.

“You can’t get more local than this,” said Frost. “What a bonanza for our hoteliers to have full hotels in the middle of the week.”

The business community is “coming behind this event,” said Newman. “The conference has really been redeveloped around being a technology and job development project,” he added. “It could really be a signature event for this community.”

Two of the Republican commissioners also said they support the festival’s goals but didn’t feel the grant is an appropriate use of taxpayers’ money.

“I don’t know how they’re going to accept us handing out $90,000 to a private company,” said Commissioner Mike Fryar, who last year joined his colleagues in unanimously approving several incentive packages for private companies to expand, including $18.38 million for GE Aviation.

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Commissioner Joe Belcher told Adams: “I really like the direction you’re going. … In the future we’re going to see some very positive things out of it.” But the festival, he argued, should seek funding from corporate sponsors rather than the government. Fryar and Belcher’s GOP colleague David King also voted against the funding, offering no public comments.

The county action follows a $90,000 package approved by the city of Asheville last month, bringing the local incentives to a total of $180,000.

However, City Council member Gwen Wisler, a Democrat, criticized the deal and cast the lone vote against it. Soon after Council’s vote, the Buncombe County Young Republicans group circulated a flier on various social media sites criticizing the deal.

Tickets for Moogfest range from $199-$499, though some discounted tickets have been offered to locals, and an allotment of free tickets was distributed as “scholarships” to local educational institutions. Some events, such as the technology job fair, will be open to the public free of charge.

Headlining musical acts include Kraftwerk, M.I.A., Pet Shop Boys and Q-Tip. X

NEWS

by Jake Frankel

jfrankel@mountainx.com

Primed for a fight Buncombe commissioners face primary challengers

Several Buncombe County Commissioners are facing challengers in the May 6 primary election. Here’s a basic rundown of the candidates and the races, broken down by district.

District 1 Democrats Brownie Newman and Keith Young will fight for a seat in District 1, which encompasses the city of Asheville and leans to the left politically. With high name recognition after serving his first term on the Board of Commissioners and eight years on Asheville City Council, Newman is touting his record of support for new city school buildings, a carbon-reduction plan and LGBT equality measures.

Young, who mounted a failed bid for the Commission two years ago, is hoping to make history by being the first African-American to serve on the board. He argues that Newman has spent too much time focused on environmental issues and wants to prioritize affordable housing and upward mobility.

The winner of the primary will go on to earn the seat in November, as no Republican challengers have filed to run in District 1.

District 2 In District 2, which encompasses Fairview, Black Mountain and Weaverville, Vice Chair Ellen Frost will face a Democratic primary challenge from former Commissioner Carol Peterson. In the 2012 election, Frost beat her by just 38 votes. Before being unseated, Peterson had served for eight years on the Commission. She’s remained politically active, serving on a number of other boards, including the Asheville Regional Airport Authority.

After her first year on the Commission, Frost is touting her record of support for economic development, new school buildings and environmental initiatives.

The primary winner will go on to face Republican Christina Merrill in the Nov. 4 general election.

Merrill lost her 2012 bid against Frost by only 18 votes; Merrill subsequently mounted an unsuccessful legal effort to challenge the results and discount many provisional ballots cast by left-leaning residents of Warren Wilson College. In the months since, she has criticized commissioners’ moves to raise property taxes and give private companies economic incentive grants.

As in 2012, the District 2 winner will determine which party controls a majority of the board’s seats.

District 3 In District 3, which stretches from Arden to Sandy Mush and encompasses the most conservative area of the county, Miranda DeBruhl is running to Republican Commissioner David King’s right.

In her campaign announcement, the political newcomer criticized him for supporting a budget that included a tax increase and for voting “with the liberals more often than not.”

In his first term, King has emphasized that his votes are guided by pragmatism over politics. He serves on the Economic Development Coalition for Asheville-Buncombe County and is touting his record of supporting businesses and new schools.

Another GOP candidate, Lewis Clay, was recruited to run by the Asheville Tea Party, but he dropped out of the race March 9 after an anonymous Twitter account revealed that his Facebook page included likes for pages with sexual content.

No Democrats are running in District 3, so the GOP primary winner will go on to earn the seat in November. X

mountainx.com

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

13

NEWS

story by Jake Frankel

graph by Steph Guinan

251-1333 ext. 115

jfrankel@mountainx.com

Judgment day A new survey by the N.C. Bar Association rates the performance of local judges, shedding light on elected officials that are often hard for voters to evaluate. Judge Ed Clontz received the lowest scores of any Buncombe County District Court justice. And he’s the only incumbent facing a fight to keep his seat on the bench.

The survey asked local attorneys to evaluate the District Court judges on a range of factors, such as overall performance, legal ability and administrative skills (see chart).

Participating attorneys were granted anonymity, which allowed them to provide honest answers without fear of retaliation from the judges they regularly present cases to. More than 100 of them provided responses to nearly all of the questions.

The idea behind the effort is to provide information about the candidates from those who know them the best, says Charles Burgin, a retired Marion lawyer who serves on the N.C. Bar Association committee that produced the survey.

“One of the real problems with the election of judges ... is that generally the public does not know who the candidates are,” says Burgin. “How in the world do you vote for a judge if you don’t know what kind of person they are? If you don’t know if they have any legal ability whatsoever, you don’t vote for them in an informed fashion.

So this is an effort to cure that.”

Buncombe County’s District Court judges are charged with dealing with a wide range of important matters, from property disputes to domestic relations. Nearly all local

misdemeanor cases fall under their jurisdiction, as well as probable cause hearings in felony cases. And judging by lawyers’ responses in the survey, three of the five incumbents are performing below state averages in every category: Judges

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Susan Dotson-Smith, Patricia Kaufmann Young and Clontz.

Judge Julie Kepple received the highest marks, followed by Judge Ward Scott. Both earned scores that exceed state averages in every category.

While all five are up for reelection, Clontz is the only incumbent drawing opposition this year.

Formerly an Asheville attorney, Clontz was appointed by thenGov. Bev Perdue in 2011 to fulfill the term of Sharon Barrett, who left the seat in order to accept a job on the Superior Court. Clontz was previously Buncombe County’s chief assistant clerk of Superior Court, and prior to that, he was assistant clerk and magistrate.

Clontz faces a primary challenge from two local attorneys: J. Matthew Martin and Thomas Amburgey. Martin previously served as associate judge of the Cherokee Court, the tribal court

Survey evaluates local judges; Clontz faces primary challenge

for the Eastern Band of Cherokee Indians. Amburgey has worked as a prosecutor for the Buncombe County District Attorney’s Office since 2007.

All three candidates will vie for a four-year term on the bench. The top-two vote-getters in the May 6 primary will move on to battle in the Nov. 4 general election. Like all judicial elections in North Carolina, the race is nonpartisan.

Burgin says his committee is currently exploring how to provide voters with information on the challengers. At the very least, the N.C. Bar Association will put out another report before Election Day with “biographical information” about them, he says. The nonprofit educational organization is also hoping to release a survey in April evaluating Superior Court justices across the state.

“I think the public does care about having the best judges we can get,” says Burgin. X

NEWS

staff reports

Send your news to news@mountainx.com.

Newsdesk Mountain Oasis festival canceled The 2014 Mountain Oasis Electronic Music Summit is canceled, organizers announced March 10. The news came as a surprise to local music fans, since presale weekend festival passes were already sold out for the fall event, even though the lineup was yet to be announced. Presale tickets will be refunded in full.

AC Entertainment co-produced Moogfest in 2010, 2011 and 2012.

After a split with Moog Music, the Knoxville-based festival promoter went ahead with its own take on electronic music: Mountain Oasis.

With acts like Nine Inch Nails, Gary Numan and Neutral Milk Hotel, the festival was well-received by fans.

But, “Unfortunately, the success necessary to sustain the venture has

eluded us,” says the announcement posted on the Mountain Oasis website.

“We want to thank all of the passionate, supportive fans who have attended the festivals, the wonderful artists who have played, and the many enthusiastic supporters in the community who have helped and encouraged us.”

In its statement, AC Entertainment promises to continue to be a major player in Asheville’s entertainment scene, continuing to book shows at the Orange Peel and the U.S. Cellular Center. “And perhaps, at some point in the future, we will have an opportunity to create another festival that highlights this ‘mountain oasis,’” it adds.

And the winners are The North Carolina Press Association recently honored Mountain Xpress with four state awards for outstanding ad designs:

• First Place, Best Color Restaurant/ Entertainment Ad: “Local Taco — Now Open,” by John Zara • First Place, Best Color Retail Ad: “Echoview Fiber,” by John Zara • First Place, Best Color Home Furnishings and Appliances Ad: Mobilia — Full Page,” by Sarah Riddle • Third Place, Best Advertising Campaign, for “Classified Ad Series,” also by Zara.

Sen. Martin Nesbitt dies The Buncombe County Democratic Party reported Sen. Martin Nesbitt’s death on March 7:

“Today a pallor has fallen over Western North Carolina as we mourn the passing of Buncombe County’s favorite son, Martin Nesbitt. Many came together late Wednesday to welcome home NC Senator Martin Nesbitt (D) after announcement of illness and his decision to step down from Senate leadership. Sadly we learned just last night that our good friend and champion for Western North Carolina has passed away.

Serving since 1979, Nesbitt became an iconic voice for mountain Democratic populism and was a champion for mental health, education, and the working poor. Sen. Nesbitt will be missed by all who knew and worked with him.

“Listing his tenure of accomplishments would be impossible but, for example, he enabled Buncombe County to implement a special funding stream for capital improvements for schools that will have a lasting impact on our community.

He was instrumental in bringing the NC Arboretum and WNC Ag center to Buncombe County. His leadership brought North Carolina the 2002 Clean Smokestacks bill forcing power plants to cut down on toxic emissions.

“Senator Nesbitt fought for better access to the ballot box including implementing early voting, pre-registration, and same day voter registration. He believed in protecting the right to vote for all members of our community and in everything he did his major charge was to look out for the average everyday person.”

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C O M M U N I T Y

C A L E N D A R

March 12 - March 18, 2014

Unless otherwise stated, events take place in Asheville, and phone numbers are in the 828 area code.

Day-by-day calendar is online Want to find out everything that’s happening today, tomorrow or any day of the week? Go to www.mountainx.com/events.

Calendar Deadlines FREE AND PAID listings Wednesday, 5 p.m.

(7 days prior to publication) Can’t find your group’s listing?

Due to the abundance of great things to do in our area, we only have the space in print to focus on timely events. Our print calendar now covers an eight-day range.

For a complete directory of all Community Calendar groups and upcoming events, please visit www.mountainx.com/events.

In order to qualify for a free listing, an event must cost no more than $40 to attend and be sponsored by and/or benefit a nonprofit. If an event benefits a business, it’s a paid listing.

If you wish to submit an event for Clubland (our free live music listings), please e-mail clubland@mountainx.com.

Free Listings

Impressions on paper: The book release party for Adventures in Letterpress will be held at Asheville Bookworks on Friday,

Online (best) http://www.mountainx.com/events/submission

March 14. The book features images of letterpress printing from 80 studios around the world, including Asheville studios and artists Handcranked, Flatbed Splendor, Mink, Jessica White, Bookworks and Eleanor Annand, whose work is pictured. (p. 20)

E-mail (second best) calendar@mountainx.com Fax (next best) (828) 251-1311, Attn: Free Calendar Mail Free Calendar, Mountain Xpress, P.O. Box 144, Asheville, NC 28802 In person Mountain Xpress, 2 Wall St. (the Miles Building), second floor, downtown Asheville.

Please limit your submission to 40 words or less. Questions? Call (828) 251-1333, ext. 365.

Animals Brother Wolf Adoption Day • SA (3/15), 11am-3pm - Held at Dough, 372 Merrimon Ave. 10 percent of the day's proceeds also donated. Info: bwar.org.

Paid Listings Paid listings lead the calendar sections in which they are placed, and are marked (pd.). To submit a paid listing, send it to our Classified Department by any of the following methods. Be sure to include your phone number, for billing purposes.

E-mail marketplace@mountainx.com.

Fax (828) 251-1311, Attn: Commercial Calendar Mail Commercial Calendar, Mountain Xpress, P.O. Box 144, Asheville, NC 28802 In person Classified Dept., Mountain Xpress, 2 Wall St. (the Miles Building), Ste. 214, downtown Asheville. Questions?

Call our Classified Department at (828) 251-1333, ext. 335.

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Benefits ArtSpace After Hours Cabaret • TH (3/20), 6-9:30pm - Ticket sales benefit ArtSpace Charter School.

Held at Isis Restaurant and Music Hall, 743 Haywood Road. $20. Tickets and info: isisasheville.com or 298-2787.

Cane Creek Middle Band Concert • TH (3/13), 7pm - Ticket sales benefit the band's trip to perform at Carnegie Hall. Held at Diana

mountainx.com

Wortham Theatre, 2 S. Pack Square. $10/ $7.50 children. Tickets and info: canecreekbandtrip.com or 280-4209.

Drenched: An Indoor Carnival Benefit • FR (3/14), 8pm - A portion of ticket sales benefit West Virginia Clean Water Hub, helping people affected by the chemical spill in West Virginia.

Donations of water by the gallon accepted. Info: ashevilleodditorium. com.

LEAF Schools and Streets • WEDNESDAYS, 5-7pm - Admission benefits this arts education program.

Held at 5 Walnut Wine Bar, 5 Walnut St. $5. Info: theleaf.org.

Lyons, CO Benefit Concert • WE (3/12), 8pm - Performances by local bluegrass artists. Ticket sales benefit Colorado flood victims. Held at the Grey Eagle, 185 Clingman Ave. $12/ $10 advance. Info: greyeagle. com.

Make A Wish Workout Sessions • SATURDAYS through (3/29), 8:159am - Donations from group workouts will benefit Make-a-Wish. Held at Plank Fitness, 16 London Road.

Suggested $10. Info: info@plankavl. com.

Silent Auction and Pancake Breakfast • SA (3/15), 8am - Proceeds will benefit N. Asheville Christian School.

Held at North Asheville Baptist Church, 20 Reynolds Mountain Blvd.

Info: 645-8053.

Business & Technology Asheville Makers • TUESDAYS, 6pm - Open to interested non-members. Top Floor Studio Coworking, 9 Walnut St. Info: ashevillemakerspace.org.

Asheville SCORE Counselors to Small Business Seminars are held in room 2046, A-B Tech's Small Business Center, 1465 Sand Hill Rd, Candler. Info: ashevillescore.org or 271-4786.

• SA (3/15), 9am-noon - "Location, Location, Location," for aspiring entrepreneurs. Free.

Goodwill Career Classes Info and registration: 298-9023, ext.

1106.

• ONGOING - Classes for careers in the food and hotel industries will include training and American Hotel and Lodging Association Certification.

Call for times. $25.

• TUESDAYS through THURSDAYS, 9am-noon - Adult basic education / high school equivalency classes.

Registration required.

• MONDAYS & WEDNESDAYS, 5:30-8:30pm - English as a second language classes. Registration required.

Free.

Woody loves his VW. • ONGOING - Entry level computer classes. Call for times. Free.

• TUESDAYS & THURSDAYS, 12:30-3:30pm - Medical office support career classes.

Fee waives for job seekers.

Registration required.

Classes, Meetings & Events Fine Woodworking classes (pd.) Continue at City of Asheville's Harvest House Community Center! Next session begins Tuesday, April 1, 9 am-Noon and meets every Tuesday for 8 weeks. • Taught by professional woodworker and instructor Robert Haase, for all experience levels. More info at: (828) 350-2051 or MPolites@ashevillenc.gov or rowilhaas@yahoo.com 60+ Men's Social Group • TUESDAYS, 6pm - Meets at Hi-Wire Brewing, 197 Hilliard Ave. Info: 275-6396.

ABWA Meeting • TH (3/13), 5:30pm - Speaker: Leslie Willmont with Smart Women On the Go. Held at Crown Plaza Resort, 1 Resort Drive. $25. Registration and info: abwaskyhy.com.

Alliance of Retired Americans • TU (3/18), 10am-noon - Meets at Kenilworth Presbyterian Church, 123 Kenilworth Road. Info: 5050691.

Around the World on a Motorcycle Presentation • (3/18), 7pm - Details a journey by Rene Cormier. Held at Eurosport, 30 Bryson St. Info: colette.a.cormier@gmail.com.

FemCity Communication Styles Workshop • WE (3/12), 11:30am-1pm - Meets at The Cantina, 10 Biltmore Plaza. Registration required. $40. Info: debbie@ yourorganizingdiva.com.

Land of Sky Toastmasters Club • TUESDAYS, 7am - Meets at the Reuter YMCA, 3 Town Square Blvd. Info: edwmcg@ aol.com.

Lillian Exum Clement Stafford Exhibit Through MO (3/31) Chronicles the first female legislator in the South. Held

at Pack Memorial Library, 67 Haywood St., in the North Carolina room. Info: 250-4740.

Operation Jumpstart the Vote • TH (3/13), 2pm & 6pm - Training sessions held at YWCA, 185 S. French Broad Ave. Info: anne299@earthlink. net.

Remembering Ravensbrück: Women and the Holocaust Through SA (3/29) - A traveling historical exhibition documenting life in this Nazi concentration camp for women.

Held in UNCA’s Karpen Hall.

Free. Info: unca.edu. Opening and lecture with Ricard Harker: March 18, 7pm.

Tax Assistance Local libraries will offer federal & state tax assistance until April 15. Attendees must bring required documents.

Info: 277-8288.

• MONDAYS & WEDNESDAYS, 10am-4pm - Pack Memorial Library, 67 Haywood St. • THURSDAYS, 10am-4pm - Weaverville Library, 41 N. Main St. • SATURDAYS, 10:30am2:30pm - Pack Memorial Library, 67 Haywood St. Not available March 15.

• TUESDAYS, 9am-4pm West Asheville Library, 942 Haywood Road. • 10am-4pm - Black Mountain Library, 105 N. Dougherty St. Video Presentation of Rena Gellison Interview • TU (3/18), 12:30pm Holocaust survivor and author of Rena’s Promise. Held in UNCA's Highsmith University Union. Info: unca.edu.

West African Drum Class • SATURDAYS through (4/26), 4pm - All levels welcome.

Carver Community Center, 101 Carver Ave., Black Mountain. Free. Info: smirkelclown@yahoo.com.

Dance Beginner Swing Dancing Lessons (pd.) 4 week series starts first Tuesday of every month at 7:30pm. $10/week per person. • No partner necessary.

Eleven on Grove, downtown Asheville. Details: www.

SwingAsheville.com

Dance Classes With DANCECLUB (pd.) Tuesdays: 6:30pm: Jazz/ Funk - 80's Dance Music!

Wednesdays: 6pm, Beginner Modern, 4 Week Series starts March 12. • Wednesdays, 7:30pm, Sexy Tease Burlesque, 6 Week Series starts March 12. • Thursdays: 10am - Booty Camp exercise class! • Saturdays: 1-3pm - Burlesque Striptease Workshop with bubbly, March 8 and April 12. • Pre-register: (828) 275-8628 or danceclubasheville@gmail.com or DanceclubAsheville.com Studio Zahiya, Downtown Dance Classes (pd.) Tuesday 9am Hip Hop Wrkt 6pm Bellydance 1 7pm Bellydance 2 8pm West African • Wednesday 6pm Bellydance 3 • Thursday 9am Hip Hop Wrkt 10am Bellydance Wrkt 4pm Kid's Dance 5pm Teen Dance 6pm AfroBrazilian 7pm West African • Sunday 5:15pm Yoga • $13 for 60 minute classes.

90 1/2 N. Lexington Avenue. www.studiozahiya.com :: 828.242.7595 English Country Dance • 1st & 3rd SUNDAYS, 4-6:30pm - Hosted by Old Farmer's Ball. Homewood Event and Conference Center, 19 Zillicoa St. Beginners' lesson: 3:30pm. $6/ $5 members.

Info: 230-8449.

Line Dance Classes • WEDNESDAYS, 9-10:30am - Held in the County Athletics and Activity Center, 708 South Grove St., Hendersonville.

Registration required. $5.

Info: linedanceclass.com or 890-5777.

Opportunity House 1411 Asheville Highway, Hendersonville. Info: 698-5517 or opportunityhouse.org.

• MONDAYS (2/17) through (3/10), 6pm - Hula classes. All fitness levels. $40/$35 members for four-week session.

I knew when I saw my new owners drive up to Brother Wolf Animal Rescue in a Jetta Sportwagen that I was headed to a good home. They obviously care about my safety plus comfort, reliability, and great mileage. I love riding around Asheville in my Jetta Sportwagen!

Woody Former resident of Brother Wolf Animal Rescue – Asheville, NC Currently residing in Historic Montford

Volkswagen of Asheville 621 Brevard Rd, Asheville, NC 28806 (828) 232-4000 • www.ashevillevw.com

Southern Lights Square and Round Dance Club • SA (3/15), 6pm - "Shamrock Shuffle Dance." Held at 301 Lily Pond Road, Hendersonville. Info: southernlights.org or 697-7732.

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by Grady Cooper & Carrie Eidson

COMMUNITY CALENDAR

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Send your event listings to calendar@mountainx.com.

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Fun fundraisers

Eco 'What's Next For Asheville Water' Presentation • MO (3/17), 6-7:30pm - With Mayor Manheimer, Save Our Water WNC and Clean Water for NC. Held at the Pack Memorial Library in the Lord Auditorium, 67 Haywood.

Info: katie@cwfnc.org or 251-1291.

Ecology of Judiasm Class • SU (3/30), 10am-5pm "Permaculture and Shmita."

Held at Asheville Jewish Community Center, 236 Charlotte St. Registration required by March 20. Info: tami@jcc-asheville.org.

Elisha Mitchell Audubon Society Presentation • TU (3/18), 7pm - A discussion of the waterbirds that nest and migrate through the NC coastal region. Free. Held in UNCA's Reuter Center.

Info emasnc.org.

Environmental and Conservation Organization Screening • WE (3/19), 6pm - CODE BLUE: Water in the Mountains, documentary.

Henderson County Public Library Main Branch, 301 N. Washington St., Hendersonville.

Drenched WHAT: Drenched: A Watery Benefit for People of West Virginia WHERE: The Odditorium, 1045 Haywood Road WHEN: 8 p.m., Friday, March 14 — a variety show at 8 p.m. followed by a dance party at 10 p.m.

WHY: Donated money, water and food-grade barrels go to Asheville to Charleston Water Relief, a community coalition to get clean, safe water where it is needed most: Charleston, W. Va., and the nine counties affected by a major chemical spill in January.

The March 14 event assists those affected by West Virginia water problems, says Matt Evans, who’s helping promote the event. Roots, the Asheville manufacturer of hum-

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mus and dips, is the sponsor.

Event organizer Amy Hamilton “approached me about doing it,” Evans notes, “and then we got the ball rolling.”

The variety-show performers include Keith Shubert and Toybox Theatre, Jenni Cockrell, Madison J. Cripps and Jim Julien with burlesque

by Tristin Vitriol and Hella Highwater, says Evans. Watery costumes are encouraged for the dance party. Amber DePixi and Brian Octavian will divine futures with tarot cards — for a donation of a gallon of water.

“People can even donate water by the gallon,” Evans adds.

Donations of $10 are suggested for the benefit, with $8 the price for an advance purchase. Tickets are available at AshevilleOdditorium.com.

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RiverLink Events 170 Lyman St. Info: riverlink. org or 252-8474.

• FR (3/14), 3-5pm - Friday Salon Series: "Sustainable Landscape Design."

Registration required.

• SA (3/15), 10am - "Winter Tree ID" nature walk.

• WE (3/19), 4-7pm - Final review of Hominy Creek Greenway Master Plan.

• TH (3/20), 11:45am-2pm - A bus tour of the French Broad and Swannanoa rivers. Meets at Asheville Area Chamber of Commerce, 36 Montford Ave. $20/free for members.

Registration required.

Food Farm-To-Table Wine Dinner (pd.) An evening in the vineyard with the culinary delights of Chef Corey Marino. Five-course menu pairs Addison Farms Wine with ingredients from local farms and artisans. Sat.,

March 22, $79. Tickets available online:http://www. addisonfarms.net/perfectpairings/

Government & Politics Blue Ridge Republican Women & Buncombe County Republican Men • 2nd THURSDAYS, 6:30pm - Registration required for optional dinner: 6 pm, $18.

Held at The Renaissance Hotel, 31 Woodfin St. Free. Info: 2301444.

Buncombe County Republican Women • 2nd THURSDAYS, 11:30am - Meeting held at The Corner Stone Restaurant, 102 Tunnel Road. Info: 337-47189.

Kids Crafty Historian at Smith McDowell House • SA (3/15), 10:30am-12:30pm - On the campus of A-B Tech, 283 Victoria Road. $5.

Registration by March 13. Info: education@wnchistory.org or 253-9231.

Dance Classes at Black Mountain Center for the Arts 225 W. State St., Black Mountain. Registration Required. Info: blackmountainarts.org or 669-0930.

• MONDAYS, 4-5pm & THURSDAYS, 4:30-5:30pm Beginners Hip Hop. Ages 6-10.

• THURSDAYS, 3:30-4:30pm Kids in Motion. Ages 3 to 5.

• SATURDAYS, 9am - Ballet.

• MONDAYS, 5-6pm - Teen Dance, ages 11-15.

Hands On! 318 N. Main St., Hendersonville. Tues.-Sat., 10am-5pm. $5 admission/ free for members, unless otherwise noted. Info: handsonwnc.org or 697-8333.

• WE (3/12), 10am-5pm - "Build Your Brain Through Play."

• TH (3/13), 10am-5pm - "Build Your Brain with Words!"

• FR (3/14), noon & 2-4pm "Build Your Brain with Art." • TU (3/18), 11am - Mad Scientist Lab Asheville Parks and Rec’s Fit Kids Class • TUESDAYS & THURSDAYS through (4/10) - Teaches ages 6-11 about a fun, active lifestyle. Meets at Stephens-Lee Recreation Center, 30 George Washington Carver Ave. Info:

jjohnston@ashevillenc.gov.

Riverlink Earth Day Art and Poetry Contest For preK-12 grade students.

Categories: 2D, sculpture, photography, bookmark art and poetry. Info: riverlink.org/ earthdaycontest.asp.

• Through WE (3/19) - Open to students throughout the French Broad Basin.

Super Saturday from the Children's Theater Festival • SA (3/15), 9am-4pm Includes performances ranging from musicians to puppeteers.

Held at Tryon Fine Arts Center, 34 Melrose Ave., Tryon. Tickets and info: 859-8322 or tryonarts.org.

Tot Time at Asheville Art Museum • TU (3/18), 10:30am - Held in Art PLAYce for Children for pre-school age children. 2 N. Pack Square. Admission fees apply. Info: ashevilleart.org or 253-3227.

Outdoors Become a certified Lifeguard this Spring! (pd.) Courses held in Asheville throughout March, April and May. Weekends and evenings.

Recertification, Waterfront, CPR/AED/First Aid also available. Check out. Call (713) 702-7669 for dates, prices, and to register, or: advancedaquaticstraining.com/lifeguarding Adult League Kickball • Through SA (3/15) Registration open for Buncombe County Parks, Greenways and Recreation's adult kickball league. Info: jay. nelson@buncombecounty.org or 250-4269.

Backpacking Basics Class • TH (3/13), 7-8:30pm - Held at REI, 31 Schenck Parkway.

Registration required. Free.

Info: avl.mx/052.

City Park Party & Cleanup • SU (3/16), 10am-3pm Hosted by Buncombe Fruit & Nut Club at Magnolia Park on Flint St. Free. Info: fruitandnutclub.com.

DuPont 12K Forest Trail Race • Through (3/29) - Registration open for this March 29 event.

Proceeds benefit the DuPont State Forest. Info: avl.mx/04s.

Lake James State Park 6883 N.C. Highway 126, Nebo. Programs are free unless otherwise noted. Info: 584-7728.

• SA (3/15), 10am - Wetlands hike. Meets at the Catawba River Area park office.

• SU (3/16), 2pm - A boat tour looking for waterfowl. Meets at the Paddy's Creek boat ramp. Registration required.

Moderate Hike to Sunset Mountain • SA (3/15), 10am - Meets at Swannanoa Valley Museum, 223 W. State St., Black Mountain. Registration and info: info@swannanoavalleymuseum.org or 669-9566.

N.C. Arboretum Located at 100 Frederick Law Olmsted Way. $12 gate fee for non-member vehicles. Info: ncarboretum.org or 665-2492.

• SA (3/15), 10-11:30am - Salamander monitoring project. All ages. Meets at the Education Center.

• (3/15), 1pm - Dinosaurthemed geocaching quest. All ages. Meets at the Education Center.

Tri Training Basics Class • WE (3/19),7-8:30pm - Held at REI, 31 Schenck Parkway.

Free. Registration required.

Info: rei.com/asheville or 6870918.

Parenting Childhood Dyslexia Documentary Screening • TH (3/20), 6pm - The Big Picture: Rethinking Dyslexia.

Held at Carolina Day School, 1345 Hendersonville Road.

Free. Reservations required.

Info: 274-3311.

First Parent Center Workshop • FR (3/14), 9-11am - "Sensory Integration Dysfunction." For families with disabilities. $15.

Registration and info: 2771315 or firstwnc.org.

Odyssey Community School Open House • WE (3/12), 5:30-7pm - For info on the 2014-15 school year. Located at 90 Zillicoa St. Info: odysseycommunity.org or 259-3653.

St. Gerard House's CONNECT Program • Through MO (3/31) Teaches K-12 students how thoughts and actions affect social situations. Held at 620 Oakland St., Hendersonville.

$18 per week. Info and registration: jenniferlaite@yahoo. com or 693-4223.

Public Lectures Ethical Society of Asheville Presentation • SU (3/16), 2-3:30pm - "How to Destroy a Democracy Step by Step." Held at Friends Meeting House, 227 Edgewood Road. Free. Info: asheville@aeu.org or 6877759.

Panel Discussion on Incarceration • TH (3/20), 6pm -"Impact of High Rates of Incarceration."

Held at Burton Street Community Center, 134 Burton St. Info: 251-6940.

Public Lectures at UNCA Free unless otherwise noted.

Info: unca.edu.

• TH (3/20), 7:30pm "Shabbat, Digital Culture, and the Politics of Rest." In the Sherrill Center.

Rep. Susan Fisher Speaks at Mars Hill • TH (3/20), noon - Part of Women’s History Month. Held in the university's Broyhill Chapel. Free. Info: mhu.edu.

Seniors Adult Forum at First Congregational • SU (3/16), 9:15am - “The Balance of Light and Dark: Vernal Equinox.” In the Felix building. 1735 5th Ave W., Hendersonville. Info: 6928630.

Spirituality AIM Meditation Classes (pd.) Ramp up your meditation practice with AIM’s Meditation’s Classes: Mindfulness 101 - Basics of Mindfulness Meditation, Mindfulness 102 - More advanced, intermediate class.

Class dates and times: www. ashevillemeditation.com/ events, (828) 808-4444 Asheville Insight Meditation (pd.) Introduction to Mindfulness Meditation Learn how to get a Mindfulness Meditation practice started.

2nd & 4th Wednesdays.

7pm – 8:30. Asheville Insight Meditation, 29 Ravenscroft Dr, Suite 200, (828) 808-4444,

www.ashevillemeditation.com Asheville Open Heart Meditation (pd.) Deepen your experience of living a heart centered life.

Connect with your spiritual heart and the peace residing within. Free, 7pm Tuesdays, 5 Covington St., 296-0017, http://www.heart-sanctuary. org Astro-Counseling (pd.) Licensed counselor and accredited professional astrologer uses your chart when counseling for additional insight into yourself, your relationships and life directions. Readings also available.

Christy Gunther, MA, LPC. (828) 258-3229.

Mike Byer Auto and Truck Repair, Inc.

Gurdjieff: The Fourth Way (pd.) In search of the miraculous? What are the possibilities of inner evolution? New groups forming for those who wish to pursue inner work.

(828) 232-2220. http://www. gurdjieff-foundation-wnc.org Mindfulness Meditation (pd.) Asheville Insight Meditation Deepen your authentic presence, and cultivate a happier, more peaceful mind by practicing Insight (Vipassana) Meditation in a supportive community.

Group Meditation. Thursdays, 7pm-8:30pm. Sundays, 10am11:30pm. 29 Ravenscroft Dr., Suite 200, Asheville, (828) 808-4444, www.ashevillemeditation.com

Hybrid Vehicle Service and Maintenance Asheville’s Hybrid Specialist. We service all things hybrid.

All levels of maintenance and repair.

HV (main hybrid battery) replacement with options for new or remanufactured batteries available.

If you have a hybrid question or concern please contact us.

135 Coxe Ave • Asheville, NC • (828) 258-0548

Mindfulness Meditation Class (pd.) Explore the miracle of healing into life through deepened stillness and presence. With consciousness teacher and columnist Bill Walz. Mondays, 6:30-7:30pm: Meditation class with lesson and discussions in contemporary Zen living. Asheville Friends Meeting House, 227 Edgewood Ave. (off Merrimon). Donation. Info: 258-3241. www.billwalz.com NO NEED TO SUFFER • A BREATH OF FRESH AIR (pd.)

Piro Papa, a former international basketball star has a Unique Perspective on spiritual existence via a close connection with the Universal Mother.

A conversation with Piro will lead to a new connection with earthly life and beyond. Bring your questions. • Saturday, March 15. 1pm--3pm. East Asheville. Suggested contribu-

mountainx.com

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

19

by Grady Cooper & Carrie Eidson

COMMUNITY CALENDAR

Send your event listings to calendar@mountainx.com.

Women's Book Study and Discussion Group • MONDAYS, 7-8:30pm - Meets at Seacoast Asheville, 123 Sweeten Creek Road. Registration and info: 277-6400.

Wudang Tai Ji Quan Class • SUNDAYS, 11-noon - Held at French Broad Co-op Movement and Learning Center, 90 Biltmore Ave. $12. Info: greg@mysticdao. com or (401) 714-1051.

Spoken & Written Word Adventures in Letterpress Release

Women and the Holocaust: As part of Women’s History Month observances, the traveling exhibition “Remembering Ravensbrück” will be displayed at UNC Asheville through March 27. It tells the story of the female prisoners and guards at the Nazi concentration camp where more than 150,000 women were interned between 1939 and 1945. (p.17)

tion: $10. For information call: (561) 613-1191.

A Course in Miracles Study Group • 1st & 3rd SUNDAYS - Held at a private residence. Directions & info: 450-4704.

A Course of Love • WEDNESDAYS, 6:30pm - A class on spiritual transformation.

Info and directions: 505-4013 or coach@selfandsensibility.com.

Asheville Center for Transcendental Meditation 165 E. Chestnut St. Info: 2544350 or meditationasheville.org • THURSDAYS, 6:30 pm Introductory lectures on the TM technique. Free.

Asheville Shamanic Journey Circle • WEDNESDAYS, 6:30-9pm Shamanic Journey experience required. $10. Registration and info: dreamtimejourneys.net or 398-0630.

Author Discussion at Nourish and Flourish • TH (3/13), 7pm - Signing and discussion of Shift: New Paradigms for a New Earth by Heather Wallace. 347 Depot St. Info: heatherwallace.net.

Cantamos Choral Performance • SU (3/16), 10am - A music ministry. Held at Trinity

20

Lutheran, 235 St. John's Road, Suite 50, Fletcher. Info: trinitylutherannc.org or 684-9770.

Center for Spiritual Living Asheville 2 Science of Mind Way. Info: cslasheville.org or 231-7638.

• SUNDAYS, 11am "Celebration of Life." Free.

Cloud Cottage 219 Old Toll Circle in Black Mountain. Info: cloudcottage. org or 669-6000.

• 2nd WEDNESDAYS, 6-7:30pm - Monthly family night.

Community Shabbat Potluck • FR (3/14), 6:30pm - Held at DNA Church, Unit C, 4 Long Shoals Road. Info: ministrydir@ longschapel.com.

Great Tree Zen Temple Located at 679 Lower Flat Creek, Alexander. Info: greattreetemple.org or 645-2085.

• 3rd SUNDAYS - Yoga from 9-10am, followed by a dharma discussion with Rev. Teijo Munnich from 10:30am-noon.

Free.

Joker's Full Moon Bonfire Gathering • FR (3/14), 7:30-9:30pm Includes music and dancing.

Held in Swannanoa. Location and info: 280-2105.

Meditation and Mindfulness Practices • SUNDAYS, 6-6:45 pm - Held at Asheville Yoga Center, 211 S. Liberty St. Free. Info: youryoga. com.

Forgiveness Meditation Class • SUNDAYS through (3/23), 7pm - Meets at Rainbow Community School, 574 Haywood Road. $8/$5 students, seniors. Info: meditationinasheville.org or 668-2241.

The Shambhala Meditation Center 19 Westwood Place. Info: shambhalaashvl@gmail.com or 490-4587.

• THURSDAYS, 7pm - A Dharma reading and discussion.

Free. Info: asheville.shambhala. org.

Grace Lutheran Church 1245 Sixth Ave. W., Hendersonville. Info: gracelutherannc.com or 693-4890.

• WEDNESDAYS through (4/9), 4:45pm - Lenten supper in Stull Hall. Reservations required.

The teachings of Bruno Groening • TU (3/18), 7pm - Held at N. Asheville Library, 1030 Merrimon Ave. Registration required. Info: suejtosh@live. com.

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

mountainx.com

• FR (3/14), 6:30-9:30pm - With author Brandon Mise. Held at Asheville BookWorks, 428 1/2 Haywood Road. Info: ashevillebookworks.com or 255-8444.

Blue Ridge Books 152 S. Main St., Waynesville. Info: blueridgebooksnc.com or 456-6000.

• SA (3/15), 3pm - Marie Bartlett will discuss her novel Pearl, MD. Buncombe County Public Libraries LIBRARY ABBREVIATIONS - All programs are free unless otherwise noted.

Each Library event is marked by the following location abbreviations: n BM = Black Mountain Library (105 N. Dougherty St., 250-4756) n FV = Fairview Library (1 Taylor Road, 250-6484) n NA = North Asheville Library (1030 Merrimon Avenue, 250-4752) n SS = Skyland/South Buncombe Library (260 Overlook Road, 250-6488) n SW = Swannanoa Library (101 West Charleston Street, 250-6486) n WV = Weaverville Library (41 N. Main Street, 2506482) • WE (3/12), 10am - Sewing Circle. SW • TH (3/13), 7pm - Book club: And the Mountains Echoed by Khaled Hosseini.

WV • TH (3/13), 1pm - Book club: Orphan Train by Christina Baker Kline. FV • FR (3/14), all day - Pi Day Celebration, age 11 and older. SW

• FR (3/14), 6pm - Book club: On Agate Hill by Lee Smith. SW • TU (3/18), 2pm - Book club: The Cat's Table by Michael Ondaatje. NA • TU (3/18), 7pm - Book club: Kill the Messenger by Tami Hoag. BM • TH (3/20), 2:30pm - Book club: The Winter People by John Ehle. SS City Lights Bookstore 3 E. Jackson St., Sylva.

Events are free, unless otherwise noted. Info: citylightsnc.com or 586-9499.

• FR (3/14), 6:30pm - Donna Glee Williams discusses her novel, The Braided Path.

• SA (3/15), 11am - Story time:Bedtime Math 2: This Time It’s Personal by Laura Overdeck.

• SA (3/15), 2pm - Folklorist and storyteller B.J. Jones offers up tales from his two novels.

Malaprop's Bookstore and Cafe 55 Haywood St. Info: malaprops.com or 254-6734.

Events are free, unless otherwise noted.

• TH (3/13), 5pm Shakespeare Salon: The Tempest.

• TH (3/13), 7pm - Erika Robuck will discuss her novel Fallen Beauty.

• SA (3/15), 5pm - Girls of Atomic City • SU (3/16), 3pm - Writers from the Great Smokies Writing Program • SU (3/16), 5pm - Poetry readings • TU (3/18), 7pm - Comix Club • WE (3/19), 7pm - Find Momo with author Andrew Klapp • TH (3/20), 7pm - JanPhillip Sendker discusses his novel A Well-Tempered Heart.

Open Poetry Reading • SA (3/15), 1-3pm Hosted by Asheville City Poets. Held at Hyphen Coffeehouse, 81 Patton Ave. Info: meetup.com/ Asheville-City-Poets.

Reading at Literary Open Stage • FR (3/14), 6:30pm - Open to interested writers of all levels. Held at Upstairs Artspace gallery, 49 S. Trade St., Tryon. Free. Info: 859-2828.

Storytellers at Nature's Corner • FR (3/14), 5pm - Personal and local history tales.

Locate at 1599 Barnardsville Highway 197, Barnardsville.

Info: facebook.com/naturescornercountrystore.

Thriving Children Children First/CIS Mind the Gap Tour • TH (3/13), 3:30pm - The Children First/CIS Mind the Gap Tour will call attention to issues that hinder the success of children and families in poverty. Free. Info and registration: AllisonJ@childrenfirstbc. org or 259-9717.

‘Becoming a Love and Logic Parent’ Six-Week Class • MONDAYS through (3/31), 6-8pm - Hosted by Child Abuse Prevention Services.

Free. Held at 50 S. French Broad Avenue. Info: mary@ childabusepreventionservices. org or 254-2000 ext 101.

Volunteering Asheville Area Habitat For Humanity Builds new homes for qualifying families and individuals while preservering existing homes. Info: info@ashevillehabitat.org.

• ONGOING - Volunteers needed for administrative office to greet visitors, answer phones.

Asheville City Schools Foundation Works to create strong public schools and break the cycle of poverty. Info: jay@acsf.org or 350-6135.

• ONGOING - Volunteers need to tutor/mentor students (K-12). Shifts are available Mon.-Fri., 8am-6pm.

Big Brothers Big Sisters of WNC Helps children thrive through partnerships with trained adult mentors. Info: bbbswnc. org or 253-1470.

• ONGOING - Volunteers age 18+ needed to accompany youth twice a month to free or low-cost activities. Volunteers age 16+ needed to mentor one hour per week.

Charlie's Angels Animal Rescue A shelter and foster network for area cats and dogs based in Fletcher. Info: wncanimal-

NEED A SAFE, COMFORTABLE, CHEMICAL-FREE MATTRESS? rescue.org or 885-3647.

• ONGOING - Volunteers are needed to foster a dog for 2 to 3 weeks. No costs involved.

Children First CIS of Buncombe County Provides programs to economically disadvantaged children & families. Info: childrenfirstbc.org.

• ONGOING - Volunteers needed for learning centers and after school program for elementary school children living in public and low-income housing. Mon.-Thurs., 2:305:30pm.

Girl Scouts Carolinas Peak to Piedmont Works to foster leadership and self-esteem in girls ages 5-17. Info: girlscoutsp2p.org or 800-672-2148.

• ONGOING - Volunteers needed age 18+, especially to be troop leaders. Membership in Girl Scouts required.

Literacy Council of Buncombe County Works to increase literacy and English language skills. Info: volunteers@litcouncil.com or 254-3442.

• ONGOING - Volunteers needed for the Adult Education Program, which teaches basic reading, writing and spelling. Previous teaching experience not required.

• ONGOING - Volunteers needed for the Augustine Program which works with low-income children reading below grade level. Previous teaching experience not required.

Loving Food Resources A special needs food pantry providing food and other items to persons living with HIV/AIDS or in hospice with any diagnosis. Info: admin@ lovingfood.org or 255-9282.

• ONGOING - Volunteers needed for stocking, helping clients shop, driving, food box delivery, sorting, graphic design and office assistance.

Hours: Tue.-Friday: 9am-noon, Sat. 9am-2pm.

MANNA FoodBank Processes donated food for distribution throughout WNC. Info: mannafoodbank.org or 299-3663.

• ONGOING - Volunteers need to work in the warehouse. Mon.-Sat. daytime and Thurs. evening.

Mountain Area Health Education Center Works for quality health care through professional training.

Info: volunteer@mahec.net • ONGOING - Volunteers with strong customer service skills needed for OBGYN practice and family health center in Biltmore. 6-month commitment requested.

Operation Toasty Toes Chapter 7 Makes knit and crochet comfort items for troops deployed overseas. Info: operationtoastytoes.org.

• 3rd MONDAYS, 10am-noon - Monthly meeting open to current and interested volunteers. Held at 105 Campbell Drive, Flat Rock. Info: 6969777.

Opportunity House 1411 Asheville Highway, Hendersonville. Info: 698-5517 or opportunityhouse.org.

• ONGOING - Seeking volunteers to help in Thrift Store and at front desk.

The Rathbun Center Provides free lodging for patients & caregivers in Asheville for medical treatment. Info: rathbuncenter.org or 251-0595.

• ONGOING - Volunteers need to support and register guests. Weekend shifts: noon3pm, 3-6pm and 6-9pm.

WNC AIDS Project Provides resources and support for AIDS patients and their families. Info: wncap.org or 252-7489.

• ONGOING - Office/clerical volunteers needed for data entry and computer-related tasks during daytime office hours Mon.-Fri. • ONGOING - Saturday morning volunteers needed to deliver food boxes to homebound men and women with HIV/AIDS in the Asheville/ Buncombe area. Good driving record and confidentiality required.

YMCA of WNC Works to build strong kids, families and communities in mind, body and spirit. Info: ymcawnc.org or 210-2265.

• ONGOING - Volunteers needed for the Rise & Reach Mentoring Program. Mentees are students in the YMCA's at-risk afterschool programs.

Background check required.

Nest Organics has it!

With some help from our friends.

100% natural latex organic wool & organic cotton

for the sleep youʼve been dreaming of...

March Mattress Special: 2 FREE organic MARCH SPECIAL: FREE organic pillows, FREE organic mattress pad, FREE organic sheet bedding with purchase of organic mattress, set$500 with every Savvy Rest mattress purchased through value, 0% financing option. the end of the month. 0% Financing available.

Check out Nest Family Resource Center, FREE classes for March & April!

51 Lexington North Ave 51 North Lexington Asheville,Ave NC Asheville, NC

828.258.1901 Full line of organics www.nestorganics.com for babies & children

YWCA Advocates for young women’s leadership and welfare. Info: 254-7206, ex. 219.

• ONGOING - Volunteers need for a variety of tasks in the child care department. A background check, medical questionnaire, TB screening and a minimum age of 16 are required.

CALENDAR DEADLINE The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m.

WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication.

Questions? Call (828)2511333, ext. 110

mountainx.com

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

21

Asheville Disclaimer by Tom Scheve

HUMOR

tomscheve@gmail.com

Find local live standup comedy events at www.DisclaimerComedy.com (and you should follow us on Twitter at @AVLdisclaimer).

The Most Beloved Page in All the Land

asheville disclaimer

Briefs 2nd annual Asheville gun rally features empty holsters to symbolize NRA’s empty threats of governmental seizure of citizens’ guns Travel Channel to feature 12 Bones’ “Hogzilla” sandwich, in conjunction with Memorial Mission’s “Mecha-Hogzilla” bypass and “Mothra-Tricor” treatment Fun-killing Chestnut Avenue/ Five Points traffic redirection plan may accidentally lower the risk to pedestrians Improvements to Sylva’s Main Street designed to elicit the maximum amount of consternation in neighboring Bugtussle Local reaction to crisis in Ukraine not gaining as much traction in Ukraine as locals predicted Bitcoin near collapse as its main trader closes shop indefinitely Users are left to wonder if their virtual money ever actually existed

KISS refuses to perform for Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction due to disagreement over line-up

Asheville, Monday — When a local Republican running for Buncombe County commissioner hit “like” on Facebook for a fan page for “Big Boobs,” he never realized the trouble it would cause.

“It seems like a no-brainer,” said one supporter of Lewis Clay, a candidate in District 3. “I mean, who doesn’t like big boobs?”

When political opponents discovered Clay liked Big Boobs on Facebook and, according to his character assassins, quite possibly off Facebook, Clay and some of his supporters were caught off guard.

“It doesn’t seem like Lewis would like big boobs,” said Tea party president Jane Bilello of the Asheville Tea Party’s favored candidate in the upcoming primary. “He is a real upstanding guy, totally boob-neutral. If anything, the Lewis I know is a total ass-man.”

Bilello said Clay shares the group’s interest in limited government, lower taxes, and regular-sized boobs.

When asked if Clay did indeed

• Sandwich Shoppe now powered by ten-year-old chimney sweeps on treadmills

The Biltmore House will be redesigned with a smaller footprint.

• No-burrito policy for restoration staff to cut down on greenhouse gas emissions

are now encouraged to walk • Instead of monthly fresh formaldehyde for Biltmore’s extensive severed head collection, “If it’s yellow, let it mellow”

Asheville Disclaimer is parody/satire

• Ornate, vaulted ceilings covered with drop ceilings with fluorescent lights

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

• Instead of burning fossil fuels driving to work, employees

mountainx.com

Kid Care with Arnold

Arnold Crapacan is a Korean War veteran and member of the Woodfin Lions Club.

Dear Arnold,

Are tympanic thermometers accurate? I seem to be getting a wide range of readings when I take my 20-month-old son’s temperature with one?

Dear Diane,

— Diane

I don’t know what tympanic means, but I do know that the only thermometer I trust is the Accutherm 800. It’s an 8” by 4” rectal thermometer used primarily on cattle. Accutherm uses only the best mercury and the thick glass usually prevents breakage during the required 2-hour required wait time. It is touchy, so if you move even a bit you’ll have to start over, but if you’re not intimidated by the look of the Accutherm 20lb/Inch Thermometer Insertion Gun, it’s measurements are untouched by other thermometers.

Changes to SAT test

• Turning off lights in even numbered zip codes of the house on odd numbered days

• Winery to use special containment system to capture/ repurpose tourists’ stinking booze breath

Twitter: @AVLdisclaimer Contributing this week: Joe Shelton, Cary Goff, Tom Scheve

like big boobs, Clay’s campaign manager responded, “No, no, no. It’s big butts he likes.”

Political observers believe Clay’s online announcement of Lewis Clay his preference for big boobs is a misstep.

“This won’t play well with the leftleaning, small-chested demo, that’s for sure,” said Chris Cooper, director of the Public Policy Institute at Western Carolina University.

Harder for his campaign to explain is Clay’s editor emeritus status at Honkers Quarterly.

The candidate himself is trying to distance himself from big boobs, but no more than arm’s length.

“I pledge here and now to consider all boobs that stand before me,” said Clay. “Nobody can say I did not grant their boobs equal time and attention, regardless of size.”

Biltmore Estate green initiatives

Nonplussed selection committee “OK with any four tired old dudes in clown make-up, really” Contact: tomscheve@gmail.com

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Local candidate put in difficult position of insisting he doesn’t like big boobs

• Biltmore to buy greenhouse gas offsets, creating a new stand of marijuana plants in Madison County • Priceless tapestries to be fashioned into tourist blankets while house is allowed to cool in winter

• Cultural bias countered by removing cotillion etiquette section • Electric shock to genitals follows every third wrong answer • Magic 8-ball allowed to aid in blind guessing • Essay replaced with 3-minute interpretive dance routine • Any student successfully committing seppuku with slide rule receives automatic 1600 • Bringing back SAT analogies is to Good idea as forceps are to (a) roach clips, (b) artery squeezers, (c) pretend opera glasses, (d) I just pinched the piss out of my hand!

• Instead of essay, students will now describe the world as they see it in 25 emoticons • Free preparation videos available online, presented as “Easter eggs” hidden within cat compillation videos on failblog.cheeseburger.com • Instead of arcane “SAT words” (“depreciatory,” “membranous”), the vocabulary definitions on the new exam will be those of words commonly used in college courses, such as “[indecipherable word from Indian TA]” and “[indecipherable word from Chinese TA]”

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Teach a man to fish...

The Drug Users Resource Center in Vancouver, British Columbia (previously heralded in News of the Weird for a vending machine dispensing 25-cent crack-cocaine pipes to discourage addicts from committing crimes to fund their habit), launched a program in August to supply alcoholics with beer-brewing and wine-making ingredients to discourage them from drinking rubbing alcohol, hand-sanitizer and mouthwash. For $10 a month, the DURC “co-op” sells brewing mix in a pre-hopped beer kit, but eventually, an official said, co-op members will brew from scratch, including boiling, mashing and milling. A civic leader told Canada’s National Post that the program has already begun reducing crime in areas frequented by alcoholics.

Government in action

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by Chuck Shepherd

could save $18 million a year (and beneficiaries another $4.5 million) if CMS used competitive bidding.

TAPROOM & PIZZERIA 56 TAPS • est. 1994 • 100 BEERS

Great art • “Heaven Sent,” Frances WadsworthJones’ jewelry show at the Museum of London, features centerpiece brooches resembling bird droppings. Why would a woman want to wear jewelry suggesting that a pigeon had soiled her lapel? “The stain is very intimate,” she said. It’s “something that you wouldn’t want, and you’re turning it into something beautiful.” Wadsworth-Jones’ pieces have sold for as much as $4,000.

• In December, the New York City Parks Department, responding to alarmed visitors at Socrates Sculpture Park in Queens, built a wooden fence to shield the sculpture “Bear Eats Man” so that parents might examine the structure before children start asking them awkward questions. The sculpture by Ms. Thordis Adalsteinsdottir is of a bear clutching and about to bite a man — who sports an erection that art aficionados say may represent the man’s involuntary reflexive shock, according to a New York Times report.

Police report Suspicion Confirmed: After Florida Highway Patrol Trooper Donna Jane Watts ticketed Miami Police Department officer Fausto Lopez in 2011 for speeding to an off-duty job at 120 mph, some in law enforcement began harassing her as a “rat,” according to a February Associated Press report. Claiming to be on official business, other officers accessed Watts’ driver record. But she identified those officers’ employers and recently filed a lawsuit under the federal Driver Privacy Protection Act, which provides penalties of up to $2,500 for each of the more than 200 unauthorized searches by 88 officers from 25 police agencies.

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• More Texas Justice: After 37 years in prison, Jerry Hartfield (described in court documents as illiterate with an IQ of 51) goes to court in April for a retrial of his 1977 conviction (and death sentence) for murder in Bay City, Texas. The 1977 conviction was overturned, but before Hartfield could demand his release, the then-governor commuted the sentence to life in prison in 1983. In 2006 a fellow inmate finally convinced Hartfield that the commutation was illusory — since there was, at that point, no “sentence” to commute. Hartfield’s lawyers call Texas’ treatment a blatant violation of his constitutional right to a “speedy” trial, but prosecutors say it’s Hartfield’s own fault that he’s remained in prison the last 30 years.

• Congressional wisdom prevents the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services from using competitive bids to decide how much to pay for medical devices; among the most steeply overpriced products are “vacuum erection systems” that invigorate seniors’ lives. CMS pays an average of $360, while the Department of Veterans Affairs, which buys the pumps by competitive bid, pays about $185. In a January report, the Health and Human Services inspector general estimated that the government

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Original

10 am to 5 pm

cascade Yarn tasting & Spring cleaning Sale!

Select alpaca and Merino wools 10-20% off!

We carry Malabrigo, Cascade, Plymouth, and Berroco Yarns; locally spun and dyed yarns and roving, plus gifts for the knitter in your life.

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READ DAILY Read News of the Weird daily with Chuck Shepherd at www.weirduniverse.net. Send items to weirdnews@earthlink.net or PO Box 18737, Tampa FL 33679.

The Shops at Reynolds Village near the Woodfin YMCA 61 N. Merrimon Avenue, Suite 113, Asheville, NC 28804 www.divasknitting.com 828.247.0344 mountainx.com

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

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W E L L N E S S

Rebuilding Dreams Family Support Network of WNC helps parents of children with special needs By micah wilkins

micahwwilkins@gmail.com

When he first learned that he would be a father, Ray Hemachandra had dreams of his child growing up to be like him.

But soon after his birth, his son, Nicholas, was diagnosed with autism, and Hemachandra quickly realized that his expectations would have to shift.

“When you get a diagnosis, there’s a lot of learning to do then,” Hemachandra says. “Here you have a child who is different, and you have to learn about it fast enough, [because your child’s] life can’t be your process. You need to step up now.”

Roxann Colwell knows the challenges of raising a child with special needs firsthand. Colwell, who has a 30-year-old daughter with Down syndrome, created the Family Support Network of Western North Carolina 15 years ago as a parent-to-parent support and mentoring program for caregivers of children with special needs. The organization offers a community resource guide, hosts support groups for families and establishes support networks for parents whose children have received similar diagnoses. From July 2012 to July 2013 the Family Support Network served 901 families.

Everything, from education to finances to navigating puberty, poses additional challenges for parents of children with special needs, but Colwell says the necessary resources and services for parents are not as easily accessed or available. Furthermore, parenting a child with special needs involves a whole variety of players and services that would not otherwise be needed when raising a typically

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MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

Parents and providers gather at Mission Children’s Hospital. From left: parent Leah Stroupe, family resource specialist Kate Glance, FSN founder Roxann Colwell and parent Ray Hemachandra. Photo by Micah Wilkins

developing child. “It’s a very overwhelming and complicated system,” says Colwell, “the service system, the bureaucracy of working through financial help and resources. ... In the whole journey of raising your child with special needs, you can wander out there a lot and not know where to go. The less wandering you have to do, the better.”

“When your child is first diagnosed, there are a lot of emotions on the spectrum of grief,” says Colwell. “They’re all normal, but you don’t know it at that point.

We tend to think we’re the only ones this has ever happened to.

That’s the irrational part of grieving.” Receiving a diagnosis can feel alienating, Colwell says, but the purpose of the Family Support Network is to reassure parents and caregivers that they are not alone.

“The hope is that they would walk out of this office with information outside of the medical realm, that they would leave here with a sense that there is another community

mountainx.com

that they can choose to be a part of. … There’s nothing in the world like a parent who’s been down that same road saying, ‘I know how you feel.’”

The Family Support Network is based in and sponsored by Mission Children’s Hospital but offers Family Group Nights once a month in Buncombe, Henderson, Madison and Transylvania counties. During these meetings, family members and caregivers gather for emotional support and resource-sharing. The Family Group Nights “provide community, a sense of place,” says Hemachandra, who has been coming to the Group Nights with his son since 2007. “You’re less isolated and alienated. You see other people [raising their children with special needs], so you know you can do it.”

Grief is a normal feeling for any family who has just received a diagnosis that their child has special needs, according to Colwell.

But for some, Hemachandra says, grief lingers for too long. “Some families are still crying,” he says.

“Those children are being mourned over, but they’re right there. …

You become a survivalist, but that’s not good enough for your child.”

The Family Support Network and Family Group Nights, according to Hemachandra, allow families to “fasttrack” the grieving process, helping to facilitate the transition from grief to acceptance. “You see children getting older and having value,” he says.

“It’s something to celebrate.”

Leah Stroupe is a Family Support Network regular who has been involved with the program for the past seven years. Her stepson, Jacob, is 8 years old and has fetal alcohol spectrum disorder. Stroupe is a parent mentor at Family Group Nights. As a parent mentor, she greets families, facilitates the evening’s conversation and provides support to families who have received the same diagnosis as her child. “I want to help parents that are just getting the diagnosis and understanding their child who has FASD know that it’s not as bad as it seems,” Stroupe says.

In addition to Family Group Nights, the Family Support Network also offers educational resources for families, including a lending library, workshops and training. “Some people want to bury themselves in a book, and others want face time,” Colwell says.

“It’s longitudinal support.”

When parents receive a diagnosis that their child has special needs, their dreams may have been interrupted, but Colwell believes that those dreams don’t need to end.

“It’s not the child they expected, but they want to learn about them and grow with them,” Colwell says.

“When you have a dream, you don’t immediately have another one ready to go. You need to rebuild those dreams. We want families to develop new dreams for their children with special needs.”

To learn more about the Family Support Network and its services, visit missionchildren.org. X

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Information/Registration: heartofasheville.com 'end of life experience' informAtionAl Workshop • TH (3/20), 5:30-7pm - Discusses terminal diagnosis in relation to Jewish theology. Part 2 of 2.

Held at Jewish Family Services, 2 Doctors Park Suite E, 417 Biltmore Ave. Info: jfswnc.org. or 253-2500. cArepArtners clAss on groWing older • TH (3/13), 11am-3pm - Held at 68 Sweeten Creek Road. Free. Reservations and info: lchase@carepartners.org or 277-4701.

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council on Aging AcA clAsses These classes discuss the Affordable Care Act. Free. Info and registration: coabc.org or 2778288.

• WE (3/12), noon-1:30pm - A-B Tech, Ferguson Building, 340 Victoria Road.

• TH (3/13), 6-7:30pm - YMI Cultural Center, 39 South Market St. • TH (3/13), 5-6:30pm - South college, Room 412, 140 Sweeten Creek Road.

• MO (3/17), 5-6:30pm - A-B Tech, Enka campus, Room 128, 1459 San Hill Road, Candler.

• TU (3/18), 5:30-7pm - Isothermal Community College, Library Auditorium, 286 ICC Loop Road, Spindale.

• TH (3/20), 11:30am-1pm - A-B Tech, Enka campus, Room 128, 1459 Sand Hill Road, Candler council on Aging medicAre clAsses This class will discuss how Medicare works.

Free. Info and reservations: coabc.org or 2778288.

• TH (3/13), 3-5pm - Black Mountain Library, 105 N. Dougherty, Black Mountain. greAter Asheville mAnkind proJect men's groups • WE (3/12), 7pm - Introductory session for this non-profit focused on men mentoring men.

Held at Unity Church, 130 Shelburne Road. Info: 782-7110.

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living heAlthy With A chronic condition Workshops Sponsored by Land-of-Sky Regional Council for people living with a chronic disease and their caregivers. Registration is open for the first two weeks. $30. Info: livinghealthywnc.org or 251-7438.

• WEDNESDAYS (3/5) through (4/9), 5-7:30pm - Held at the Henderson County Athletics and Activity Center, 708 S. Grove St., Hendersonville.

• MONDAYS, (3/10) through (4/14), 10am12:30pm - Held at Jewish Family Services, 2 Doctors Park, Suite E, 417 Biltmore Ave. living heAlthy With diABetes clAss • MONDAYS, 7-9:30pm - Meets at Woodfin YMCA, 40 N. Merrimon Ave, Suite 101. $30.

Registration and info: 251-7438.

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MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

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red cross Blood drives Additional info: redcrosswnc.org. Appointment and ID required for blood drives.

• MO (3/17), 1:30-5:30pm - Care Partners, 68 Sweeten Creek Road. Appointments and info: 277-4800.

support groups Adult children of Alcoholics & dysfunctionAl fAmilies ACOA is an anonymous 12-step program for women and men who grew up in alcoholic or otherwise dysfunctional homes. Info: adultchildren.org.

• FRIDAYS: • 7pm - Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. • SATURDAYS: • 8:30am - First Baptist Church, 312 5th Ave. W., Hendersonville • SUNDAYS: • 3pm - The Servanthood House, 156 E. Chestnut St. • 3pm - Clyde Town Hall, 8437 Carolina Blvd., Clyde • MONDAYS: • 7pm - First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. Al-Anon / AlAteen fAmily group A support group for the family and friends of alcoholics. Info: wnc-alanon.org or 800-2861326.

• WEDNESDAYS: • 11:30am - Pardee Education Center at the Blue Ridge Mall, 1800 Four Seasons Blvd., Hendersonville • 5:45pm & 7pm - Grace Covenant Presbyterian Church, 798 Merrimon Ave. • THURSDAYS: • 7pm - West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Road • 7pm - Pinecrest Presbyterian Church, 1790 Greenville Highway, Flat Rock • 7pm, New Hope Presbyterian Church, 3070 Sweeten Creek Road • FRIDAYS: • noon - Brevard-Davidson River Presbyterian Church, 300 East Main St., Brevard • 1pm - First Baptist Church, 5 Oak St. • 8pm Cathedral of All Souls, 9 Swann St. • SATURDAYS: • 9am & 10am - First Baptist Church Annex, 312 5th Ave. W., Hendersonville • 10am - First Methodist Church, 66 Harrison Ave., Franklin • 10am - Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. • 10am - St. Mary’s Episcopal Church, 337 Charlotte St. • noon - First Baptist Church, 63 N. Main St., Weaverville.

• SUNDAYS: • 5pm - West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Road.

• MONDAYS: • noon - First Baptist Church, 5 Oak St. • 6pm - Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. • 7:30pm - First United Methodist Church, 77 Jackson St., Sylva • 8pm - Ledger Baptist Church, 208 Church Road, Bakersville. • 8pm - Pinecrest Presbyterian Church, 1790 Greenville Highway, Flat Rock.

• TUESDAYS: • 10am - St. Barnabas Catholic Church, 109 Crescent Hill Drive, Arden • 4pm Grace Church, 242 Highway 107 N., Cashiers. • 7pm - First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. • 7:30pm - St. Phillips Episcopal Church, 256 East Main St., Brevard • 8pm - Brevard-Davidson River Presbyterian Church, 249 E. Main St., Brevard.

Asheville Alcoholics Anonymous A fellowship of men and women who share their experiences to help each other recover from alcoholism. Info: ashevilleaa.org.

• ONGOING - Visit their website or mountainx. com/events for a full list of meetings in the WNC area.

BAlAnce point collABorAtive Located at 263 Haywood St. unless otherwise noted. Info: balancepointnc.com or 348-6922.

• 3rd TUESDAYS, 5:30-6:30pm - New Voice, a support group for eating disorder recovery. deBtors Anonymous 12-step recovery on issues of underearning, debt and learning to live one's vision in life.

Info: debtorsanonymous.org.

• MONDAYS, 7pm - First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St., Room 101. depression And BipolAr support AlliAnce • WEDNESDAYS, 7-9pm & SATURDAYS, 4-6pm - Meets at 1316-C Parkwood Road. Free. Info: MagneticMinds.weebly.com or 367-7660. diABetes support group • 3rd WEDNESDAYS, 5:30pm - Group brings together people with diabetes to learn and support each other through education. Held at 3rd Floor, Room B, Mission Health, 1 Hospital Drive.

Info: laura.tolle@msj.org or 213-4788. emotions Anonymous: Asheville • TUESDAYS, 7pm - A 12-step program for anyone desiring to live a healthier emotional life.

Held at Oak Forest Presbyterian Church, 880 Sandhill Road. Info: 631-434-5294. heArt of recovery meditAtion group • TUESDAYS, 6pm - Integrates meditation practice with any 12-step recovery program. Held at Shambhala Meditation Center, 19 Westwood Place. Info: asheville.shambhala.org. living With chronic pAin • 2nd WEDNESDAYS, 6:30-7:30pm - Hosted

by American Chronic Pain Association. Held at Swannanoa Library, 101 W Charleston Ave, Swannanoa. Info: 776-4809. memorycAregivers netWork Support for caregivers of loved ones who suffer from dementia and Alzheimer's. Info: 645-9189 or 230-4143.

• 3rd TUESDAYS, 1pm - New Hope Presbyterian Church, 3070 Sweeten Creek Road. men Working on life issues group • TUESDAYS, 6-8pm - Meets at 90 Zillicoa Ave. Info: 686-5590 or 683-7195. mission heAlth fAmily group night • 3rd MONDAYS, 5:30pm - For caregivers of children with special health care needs and developmental concerns. St. Gerard House, 620 Oakland St., Hendersonville. Info: 213-9787. nAr-Anon fAmily groups A group for relatives and friends who are concerned about the addiction or drug problem of another. Info: nar-anon.org.

• WEDNESDAYS, 12:30pm - First United Methodist Church, 204 6th Ave. W., Hendersonville. Info: 891-8050.

• TUESDAYS, 7pm - West Asheville Presbyterian Church, 690 Haywood Road. nArcotics Anonymous of Wnc NA provides support to men and women for whom drugs had become a major problem.

Local helpline: 866-925-2148. Info: wncna.org.

• ONGOING - Visit their website or mountainx. com/events for a full list of meetings in the WNC area.

National Alliance on Mental Illness NAMI offers support to people living with mental health issues and their families, friends and loved ones. Located at 356 Biltmore Ave., Suite. 207. Info: namiwnc.org or 505-7353.

• THURSDAYS, 2pm - Dual Diagnosis Group at the Central United Methodist Church, 27 Church St. • 3rd TUESDAYS, 6pm - Connection Group and Family/Caregiver Group at the NAMI office, 356 Biltmore Ave.

S-Anon Family Groups

Overeaters Anonymous A fellowship of individuals who are recovering from compulsive overeating. A 12-step program.

• THURSDAYS: • noon - Biltmore United Methodist Church, 376 Hendersonville Road.

Info: 277-1975 • 6:30pm - Cox House, 723 N. Grove St., Hendersonville. Info: 329-1637.

• FRIDAYS: • 10am- Biltmore United Methodist Church, 376 Hendersonville Road.

Info: 277-1975.

• SATURDAYS: • 9:30am - 424 W. State St., Black Mountain. Info: 669-0986.

• MONDAYS: • 6pm - First Congregational UCC, 20 Oak St. Info: 516-650-5626. • 6:30pm - Balfour United Methodist Church, 2567 Asheville Highway, Hendersonville.

Info: 800-580-4761.

• TUESDAYS, 10:30am - Grace Episcopal Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. Info: 609-7310808. • 5:30pm - First Presbyterian Church, 46 Presbyterian Drive, Sylva. Info: 508-2586.

• THURSDAYS, 6pm - Grace Episcopal

Recovering Couples Anonymous Support group for couples where at least one member is recovering from addiction.

Info: recovering-couples.org.

• MONDAYS, 6:30pm - Foster Seventh Day Adventist Church, 375 Hendersonville Road.

Meets every other week. Info: crimsonmanzanita@yahoo.com.

• ONGOING - An anonymous 12-step program for those affected by another's sexaholism. Four meetings available weekly in WNC. Days, times, locations and additional info: wncsanon@gmail.com or 258-5117.

SMART Recovery A peer support group to help individuals gain independence from all types of addictive behavior (drugs, alcohol, gambling, sex, etc.).

Church, 871 Merrimon Ave. Info: 407-0460.

• SUNDAYS, 7pm - Crossroads Recovery Center, 440 East Court St., Marion. Info: 925-8626

T.H.E. Center for Disordered Eating 297 Haywood St. Info: thecenternc.org or 337-4685.

• WEDNESDAYS, 7-8pm - Eating disorders adult support group, led by licensed therapists and dietitians • 1st & 3rd MONDAYS, 5:30-6:30pm - Group for family members, caregivers and friends of individuals struggling with eating disorders.

MORE WELLNESS EVENTS ONLINE Check out the Wellness Calendar online at www.mountainx.com/events for info on events happening after March 20.

CALENDAR DEADLINE

Eating Right for Good Health Leah McGrath,RD, LDN Corporate Dietitian, Ingles Markets Follow me on Twitter: www.twitter.com/InglesDietitian Work Phone: 800-334-4936

Got

(free of artificial growth hormones)

Milk?

In the early 80’s Ingles Markets purchased a milk processing plant (MILKCO) in West Asheville from Sealtest and since then we have been able to “bottle” our own milk. The raw milk that is processed to become Laura Lynn milk comes from dairy farmers who we consider local i.e most less than 150 miles away. Like English Farms in Marion and Ramsey Dairy Farm in Fairview.

The deadline for free and paid listings is 5 p.m. WEDNESDAY, one week prior to publication.

Questions? Call (828)251-1333, ext. 110

Several years ago we began getting more and more questions from our customers about whether these cows were being given artificial growth hormones like rBGH (recombinant growth hormone) and rBST (recombinant bovine somatropin) to increase their milk supply. To allay fears about the possible negative effects of these growth hormones we asked all our dairy farmers to sign legal affadavits that stated that they would NOT administer these artificial growth hormones.

This of course does not mean that the cows are hormone free as cows have their own natural hormones which enable the cow to produce milk.

Once all of our dairy farmers were “on board” we began advertising that our Laura Lynn milk was from cows who had not been given artificial growth hormones and this information is still on the Laura Lynn milk labels and often appears in our advertising and in-store signage as overhead posters..

Ingles Markets remains committed to providing Laura Lynn milk that is from cows that have not been given rBGH or rBST.

mountainx.com

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

27

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Why I garden: Five questions with a local grower

by Carrie Eidson

ceidson@mountainx.com

In our new feature, area growers introduce their gardens. This week Jackie Dobrinska tells us about the functional herb garden she founded as part of The Lord’s Acre community garden in Fairview.

Mountain Xpress: Tell us about your garden.

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MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

Dobrinska: Our goal is to empower and nourish members of the community through herbs and herbal education. We do this by growing and distributing free and low-cost functional plants; offering educational opportunities related to their use; and providing a place where people can connect to the earth and to each other.

The garden started in late winter of 2012 after Susan Sides [executive director of the Lord’s Acre] and I started a conversation about beginning an herb garden. I applied for some grants and when two were awarded, I realized the garden wanted to come into being.

With the help of many generous hands the garden blossomed. In the coming years we are looking to bridge more partnerships within the community and supply more access to herbs to those in need. Part of the goal is to work with schools, women’s shelters and other community groups.

What do you grow?

We focus on local, abundant medicinal herbs that are safe and effective at promoting health, and are self-sustaining.

Imagine all plants falling along a spectrum: On one side of the spectrum is food and on the other are toxins. In the middle are medicinals.

We focus on the side of the spectrum between food and medicinals — spices, tonics and medicines that most people can use.

Some plant allies that live in the garden include echinacea, chamomile, holy basil, calendula and ashwaganda to name a few.

mountainx.com

One part education, one part magic: The Functional Herb Garden is an educational garden that allows the public to learn about the medicinal and emotional value of herbs. Photo courtesy of Jackie Dobrinska

Why is this your passion?

Herbs are “the people’s medicine” and are so empowering. When I get a cold, sting, cut, infection, bellyache, or other ailment, instead of going to a drugstore I first go to my herbal medicine chest.

The garden is a place people can go to get their hands into the dirt and be transformed, even while they are helping others to transform. Our garden is one part magic, one part service, one part transformation and one part empowerment.

How can I get involved with the herbal garden?

The Lord’s Acre (and the herbal garden) has a garden workday every week from spring until fall — 6 p.m. to 10 p.m. on Wednesdays. You can learn more at thelordsacre.org.

This year, we will have two plant adoption days to continue to fill out the herb garden. If you have herbal splits or starts you would like to donate, contact me a jldobrinska@ gmail.com.

What are some techniques you recommend for people wanting to start an herb garden at home?

Go into your yard and look around. There are a lot of plants there that you might consider weeds that actually have tremendous medicinal value. Learn about them, make them your ally. It starts by making plants your friend, building a relationship with them, and bringing them into your life.

Jackie Dobrinska is a yoga therapist, author, health educator and outreach coordinator for Red Moon Herbs. For more information on the functional herb garden, contact Dobrinska at jldobrinska@gmail.com or visit asimplevibrantlife.com.

Send your farm-and-garden news to garden@mountainx.com.X

Garden Calendar

ASAP’s Community Supported Agriculture Fair • TH (3/13), 3-6pm - For information about programs and products. Free.

shop. plant. feast!

Held at Jubilee!, 46 Wall St. Info: 2361282 or events@asapconnections.org.

Info: 389-8931 or southernappalachianfamilyfarms.com.

MASTER GARDENERS LECTURE TU (3/18), 10am & 5:30pm - “Intro to Gardening in the WNC Mountains.”

Held at 94 Coxe Ave. Registration & info: 255-5522 or joyce.plemmons@buncombecounty.org

Tailgate Markets • TUESDAYS: • 2:30-5:30pm - Barnardsville Farmers Market, held at Nature’s Corner Country Store, 1599 Barnardsville Highway.

• SATURDAYS: • 9am-noon - Jackson County Markets Market, 23 Central St., in the Community Table. Through March.

• DAILY: • 8am-5pm - WNC Farmers Market, 570 Brevard Road. Year-round.

Growing Wise Workshop with Sow True Seed • SA (3/15), 9:30am-noon - Discusses how to successfully grow potatoes.

Registration required. $10 max (sliding scale). Held at 146 Church St. Info: 2540708 or sowtrueseed.com/events Southern Appalachian Family Farms Workshop • TH (3/13), 9am-2pm - “I raised, grew or produced it, now how do I sell it?”

Held at 36 Davis Loop #1, Hayesville.

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REEMS CREEK

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WNC Medicinal Herb Club Workshop • TU (3/18), 5pm - Discusses site assessment, bed preparation, and seeding methods. Meets at Mountain Crops Research and Extension Center, 455 Research Drive, Mills River. Registration and info: meghan_ baker@ncsu.edu

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SATURDAY March 22, 2014 $20 adults/$15 kids with pre-registration GetYourRearInGear.com To sponsor, volunteer or get more information about this event, contact: 5K@ashevillegastro.com

for Colon Cancer Awareness

828-254-0881 mountainx.com

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

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F O O D

Not so fast Slow-cooker classes promote healthy eating

By hayley benton

hbenton@mountainx.com 251-1333 ext. 128

The smell of healthy, home-cooked food wafts through Sharing House in Brevard. As meat simmers in the pot, the students taking Sharing House’s newest cooking class slowly add fresh produce, taking care not to boil away the nutrients.

“I was just trying to think of ways to help people eat better — eat more nutritiously,” says Marion Latham, the pantry manager at Sharing House, a Christian ministry. “I think clients get excited about cooking. It gets them interested. A lot of them have families and children, and we’re glad that [healthy eating] is going to get passed down.”

The 33-year-old, faith-based organization takes the phrase “Love thy neighbor as thyself” to heart. Since Jan. 1, it’s already helped more than 660 households.

“We serve the residents of Transylvania County who struggle to make ends meet,” Director Shelly Webb explains. “They just walk in and present a need — for food or clothing or a utility, like if they have a cut-off bill.”

Now, however, Sharing House is serving its neighbors (the preferred term for clients) in a new way.

“The Crock-Pot class is a great example of what a community can do in partnership,” says Webb. “We had the idea based on a need we saw. We would give out food, like fresh produce, but sometimes people don’t know what they can do with their food.

“We live in a world now that relies on microwaves. Using a Crock-Pot is so easy: You can go to work, come back and have a great meal for your family.”

A $3,000 grant from the Lutheran Church of the Good Shepherd funded the three classes developed to date and covered the cost of the slow cook-

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ers and cookbooks all participants receive. Guided by a nutrition educator from the N.C. Cooperative Extension Service, Transylvania County residents in need learn to cook low-cost, healthy meals. And given the classes’ popularity, Sharing House hopes to be able to continue offering them.

“We had our first workshop in December, our second in January, and we’re doing our third in March,” notes Latham. Each class teaches two meals — one vegetarian and one using an inexpensive cut of meat — that participants can either eat there or take home to their families.

Karen Robinson attended the January session, where they learned to make a meatless spaghetti sauce and cream of mushroom soup over chicken and pasta. “I really enjoyed the class,” she says. “I had taken several healthy eating classes [with Sharing House] because my daughter is diabetic, but it’s just so hard to come in and try to cook a good, balanced meal and help with homework too.

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Home-cooked: From left, Sharing House Clients Angela Ferguson and Stacey Smith and volunteer Bob Milligan with a Crock-Pot. Each participant in Sharing House’s slow-cooker classes recieves a free Crock-Pot to take home. Photo by Alicia Funderburk.

“But if you cook in a slow cooker and you use a good piece of meat, you’ve got enough for dinner and leftovers for the next two or three days,” notes Robinson. “It’s really good for people on a fixed income or food stamps that don’t have enough for the whole month.

Their kids will be eating healthier — not so much fast food — and the food tastes much better.

“I just hope that Sharing House keeps the class up until they reach as many clients as they possibly can,” she continues.

Enrollment is limited to 10 or 12 per session, and the idea quickly proved so popular, says Latham, that Sharing House began letting only three people sign up per day, to give more folks a chance to take a class.

“We’re trying to find innovative ways to meet people’s needs and to empower them,” Webb reveals. A slow cooker, she notes, “takes a lot less energy, and you can save a lot of money and open up a door to meals that they didn’t know they could create. And coming together as a group of neighbors, they can swap recipes.

It’s a shared experience.

“It’s a great example of community.

When you hand somebody a CrockPot, you hand them a door to a future of healthy meals for their family.”

Classes are exclusively for Sharing House clients. The next one will be offered Friday, March 21. To learn more, visit sharinghouse.org or email tcm@sharinghouse.org. X

FOOD

by Gina Smith

gsmith@mountainx.com

Small bites Notes from the Asheville food scene Food Truck Showdown This year’s Asheville Tattoo and Arts Expo will host the inaugural Asheville Food Truck Showdown in the parking lot of the Masonic Temple on Saturday, March 15.

Organizers say at least a dozen local trucks, including El Kimchi, Gypsy Queen Cuisine, Pho Ya Belly and Farm to Fender, will present their signature dishes to be judged by a team of local celebrities in a battle for the title of Best Food Truck in Asheville.

The event will be hosted by Pinups for Pitbulls and all proceeds will benefit MANNA FoodBank, the Asheville Humane Society and the Asheville Masonic Temple.

Attendees are encouraged to bring canned goods or pet food to donate.

Admission to the showdown is free, and all the competing trucks will be offering their usual menus, so the event would be a great option for grabbing lunch or dinner. The Tattoo and Arts Expo is also offering a free pop-up art gallery in the dining room of the Masonic Temple.

“We are looking forward to showcasing some of Asheville’s most innovative cuisine and helping out some great charities as part of a whole weekend of fun for everyone,” says event organizer J.R. Yarnall.

Food trucks can enter the competition through Wednesday, March 12, by contacting Yarnall at ashevilletattooexpo@gmail.com.

Events take place noon-8 p.m.

Saturday, March 15, at the Masonic Temple, 80 N. Broadway.

Gluten-Free Expo The seventh annual Gluten Free Expo will be held 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Saturday, March 29, at UNC Asheville’s Kimmel Arena, Sherrill Center. This year’s event will feature door prizes and informational booths with more than 50 local and national vendors. Guest speakers will include dietitian and nutrition blogger Rachel Begun and cookbook author Beth Hilson. At

Farm-to-table wine dinner Addison Farms Vineyard in Leicester will host its first Perfect Pairings farm-to-table wine dinner on Saturday, March 22. The winery is partnering with Chef Corey Marino to offer a five-course menu with wine pairings that will include rabbit rillete in puff pastry, seared sea scallop, fig-and-balsamic-glazed pork loin, braised short ribs and beet cake with beet sorbet. Featured farmers and artisan producers for the event are Dillingham Family Farm and Dry Ridge Farm along with artisan vinegar crafter Highland Gourmet.

Reception at 6 p.m., seating at 6:30 p.m. March 22, 4005 New Leicester Highway, Leicester. Tickets are $79. addisonfarms.net.

Food Fighters: Mioki Chong and Don Lee of El Kimchi will be among the competitors battling it out at Asheville’s inaugural Food Truck Showdown on March 15.

Photo by Nathan Metcalf

1 p.m., a panel of experts will answer questions about celiac disease and gluten sensitivity. Admission is $5 for ages 12 and older with a family maximum of $20. All proceeds benefit local gluten intolerance groups.

Details: ingles-markets.com/ask_leah or call Leah McGrath at 800-334-4936.

Wonders for Wanda Members of the community of Barnardsville are hosting an event, Wonders for Wanda, on Saturday, March 15, in Weaverville to raise money to support Sheena’s Restaurant owner Wanda Evans, who is battling cancer. Wonders for Wanda kicks off with a yard sale at 8 a.m. Family activities begin at 3 p.m., including raffles, face painting, cornhole, photography sessions and more. Starting at 4 p.m., barbecue dinners prepared by Fish’s Backporch BBQ will be available for $8 each. A gospel concert by the Brank Family begins at 6 p.m.

The fundraiser will be held at Piney Mountain Church, 150 Elkins Branch Road, Weaverville. Donations can be made by calling 508-5600 or visiting gofundme.com/6tk60g.

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Hickory Nut Gap Farm open house Last week Hickory Nut Gap Farm in Fairview held a three-day, old-fashioned barn raising with a few dozen members of Union Grove Amish Church to build a new farm workshop and equipment shed. The construction is part of a larger project that will include an on-farm butcher shop, inspected kitchen and larger retail space. There are plans to start offering a take-out menu along with baked goods made on-site using farm-grown ingredients. Construction on the new buildings is slated for completion at the end of August. An open house will be held on Saturday, March 15, to give the public a chance to check out the new structures and find out more about the project. Free meat samples will be offered, and at 1 p.m. owner Jamie Ager will give a free tour of the farm and answer questions about the expansion.

7 DAYS LUNCH & DINNER 640 MERRIMON AVE. SUITE 205, ASHEVILLE • 828-225-6033 www.zEn-SuSHI-ASHEVILLE.com

Details: Hickorynutgapfarm.com Wine-tasting dinner at Posana Café Weinhaus continues its longstanding series of wine-tasting dinners with an event on Thursday, March 20, at Posana Café. Posana’s executive chef, Peter Pollay, will prepare the meal, which will be served with wine pairings by Weinhaus in the Pack Square restaurant’s private dining room.

7 p.m. March 20, Posana Café, 1 Biltmore Ave. Tickets are $70.

Reservations: 254-6453 X

Magnolia Ray Just 5 min. North of Downtown Asheville 5 minutes South of Weaverville 72 Weaverville Hwy 828-258-5228 • www.magnoliaray.com

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FOOD

by Mado Hesselink

trueselfyoga.com

The family kitchen

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I once read a science fiction novel where quiche was the pizza of the future. I don’t remember much else about the book, but the quiche idea stuck with me. The beauty of quiche, much like pizza, is that you can eat it with your hands. What differentiates it from pizza is the protein-and-veggie-to-carbohydrate ratio. While pizza is basically carb city with a few veggies or pieces of meat thrown on top for flavor and decoration, quiche is potentially a powerhouse of nutrition. I usually stuff mine full of lightly steamed broccoli and sprinkle in some bacon or smoked trout for flavor (if you are vegetarian, I bet that tempeh fakin’ bacon would be tasty).

I’ve been refining my approach to quiche over the past several months in the hopes of turning it from a special-occasion meal to an every week kind of deal. In general, I try to create healthy meals that cost as little as possible without sacrificing quality or flavor. As a busy parent, I’m also looking for recipes that are hassle-free and consumed by the short people without complaint.

My French mother’s method of baking a crust from scratch is out of the question for most of us (except perhaps on special occasions) because it is time-consuming, unpredictable and less than healthy.

Premade pie crusts solve the convenience issue, if not the health concern. The key to using them is precooking the crust enough that the bottom isn’t soggy, but not so much that the sides burn before the egg is cooked. Easier said than done.

Local Goodness: If you don’t have time to cook, many local eateries offer quiche by the slice for a grab-and-go meal. Pictured is a piece of spinach-feta quiche from City Bakery. Photo by Nathan Metcalf

I’ve seen pie rings that cover the sides, and I keep thinking I want one, but I’ve figured out a method that works without them. Put a cookie sheet on the lowest oven rack, then place the pie pan directly on the cookie sheet. Check the crust frequently and use a fork to poke extra holes wherever it puffs up.

Once the bottom of the crust is cooked, add your choice of fillings and beaten eggs then cook at 350 degrees until the eggs are set.

The store-made crusts from the natural foods store cost about $5

Now serving breakfast on weekends and an extended lunch menu

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for two. The quality of the oils we eat is really important to our family, so while in theory I could find them cheaper at the regular grocery store, those don’t pass the test for regular consumption. I did try a gluten-free crust once. Once.

I threw away the second one in the package of two. Hopefully there are better brands, but the one I tried tasted like cardboard and felt like sand. If your family avoids gluten, it may be worth it for you to try a few different brands — or you can try my latest discovery: crustless quiche.

While the protein/carb ratio is already better in quiche than pizza, I recently realized that I could make the quiche cheaper, quicker and healthier by removing the crust. I know some purists will be offended by the very idea of a quiche without a crust. Fine.

Call it a frittata if you must, but if you want a healthy food you can eat with your hands, reheat easily and pack full of veggies, this fits the bill. To make it yourself, simply oil a pie dish, add your fillings and pour blended eggs and spices on top (cream optional). Bake the whole thing as you would a regular quiche. X

FOOD

by Toni Sherwood

writing.asheville@gmail.com

Funding growth

A HAND UP: Neal and Ava Morgan accept their WNC AgOptions grant from Bill Teague, chairman of the N.C. Tobacco Trust Fund Commission. The Morgans plan to use the money to construct a building on their farm for selling frozen beef.

Photo courtesy of WNC AgOptions

WNC AgOptions awards farm grants for 2014 Many local farmers left their work behind on Thursday, Feb. 27, to attend the WNC AgOptions 2014 Award Ceremony at the Mountain Horticultural Crops Research and Extension Center in Mills River.

According to AgOptions Project Coordinator Jennifer Ferre, 2014 marks the 10-year anniversary of grant-giving for the organization, which has awarded more than $1.7

million in mini-grants over the last decade. During her opening address at the ceremony, Ferre welcomed three new counties to the program: Burke, Caldwell and Rutherford.

Out of more than 100 applicants, 29 recipients received grants this year: 22 farm businesses received $6,000 each, and seven received $3,000 each.

Funded projects range from portable netting for piglets, to a grist mill for grinding grits and corn for feed, to funds for starting a truffle orchard on a third-generation farm that used to grow tobacco.

The N.C. Tobacco Trust Fund Commission has been AgOptions’ sole funding source since the program’s

first grant cycle in 2004 so, according to Ferre, tobacco farms take precedence.

“Every year there is a theme,” says Ferre. “Livestock seems to be the theme this year. There’s a lot of growth opportunity and demand for all that now.”

Neal and Ava Morgan of Shady Place Farms in Leicester plan to construct an on-farm building with their grant money so customers can buy freezer beef. “We’d like a decent structure to sell from instead of our garage,” Ava says. The Morgans also envision their upcoming store as a community resource; they will allow neighboring farmers to set up displays with brochures and information.

Bill Hendley, 78, of McDowell County is going to use his $6,000 grant to expand his beekeeping operation from 10 to 40 or 50 beehives. “I love bees,” Hendley says. “I’m not ready to retire. I want to start up my own business.” Hendley has already been selling his honey at farmers markets, but the grant will allow him to expand quickly, and that means more profits.

A decade of experience with farmers means Ferre can spot potential issues before they happen. “Back pockets and dashboards of trucks are not good places to store your receipts,” Ferre told the group, only half jesting.

The organization also understands the nature of granting money to innovative projects. “We don’t expect every project to go perfectly,” Ferre says. “If you try something and it doesn’t work, that’s good information for us. It’s about your experience.”

After the grants were awarded, the guests were invited to attend presentations by former grant recipients and workshops on business planning and marketing — not a typical day’s work for most farmers.

For a list of all 2014 grant recipients, visit wncagoptions.org/2014-topics/. X

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by Michael Franco

writermikef@gmail.com

Behind the bar

Discounts Available

675 hour Massage Certification Program Accepting Applications for April 2014

Rhubarb bartender creates cocktails with a twist (of history)

AshevilleMassageSchool.org • 828-252-7377 In the new, regular interview series Behind the Bar, Michael Franco talks to some of the talented men and women who keep the beer, wine and spirits flowing at some of Asheville’s favorite watering holes.

Sunday Brunch & Dinner beginning the first weekend in April.

Tuesday- ½ Price local draft beer Wednesday- ½ Price glass of wine LIVE MUSIC Tuesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday

Many a bar has been blamed for luring students away from their studies. But in Hank Fuseler’s case, the call of the bar led him to abandon a path as a teacher. Fuseler graduated college in 1997 with a degree in English, did some substitute teaching and eventually went back to work on his master’s while working as a bartender. That’s when he realized that not only was bartending more lucrative, but that he enjoyed it and that it fit nicely with his creative pursuits, such as photography and painting. After stints at Fig and Laughing Seed, he joined Rhubarb last October. I bellied up to Bar R at Rhubarb to find out more.

Michael Franco: What’s your approach to designing the drink program at Rhubarb?

Hank Fuseler: With the drinks, I don’t try to get too far down the track of geeky cocktail production. I try to keep things balanced between being interesting and something you

greenteasushi.com

2 Regent Park Blvd. | 828-252-8300 Like us on facebook.com/greenteasushi 34

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BALANCING ACT: With the drinks menu at Rhubarb, bartender Hank Fuseler tries to maintain a healthy balance between cocktail geekery and the tried-and-true. Photo by Michael Franco

haven’t seen before, but also being something that’s not that difficult to comprehend and understand.

So I picked the theme of following the history of American cocktails because it seems like a good theme to give myself for a restaurant like Rhubarb that’s trying to do simple, modern American food. I wanted to do a simple, modern menu that reflected the history and gave me some kind of path to follow.

Tell me more about this historical approach.

Basically I decided to follow the history of the American cocktail in a loose sense. I mean, not where I’m trying to make everything completely how it would’ve been made in the early 1800s, but using those recipes and those concepts that were around at the earliest stages of the evolution of the cocktail to riff off for our menu.

Lately we’ve been heading more into the late 1800s and pre-Prohibition cocktails. Which is really when the cocktail scene blew up in the United States. That’s when

bartenders started becoming celebrities, and they were even bringing bartenders from the States over to Europe. I think it’s kind of cool because it was such an American thing, kind of like jazz.

So what can we look forward to on your spring menu?

I want to get more into doing things with botanicals. One thing that I like about this town, that I’ve tried to feature in other beverage programs I’ve designed, is the notion of it being a town that’s very oriented toward horticulture in all different ways. My goal for spring is to make it a greener, fresher, more botanical menu using the history of the soda shop and the pre-Prohibition era as inspiration for drinks. I’m really a fan of using herbs in cocktails, whether it’s fresh muddled herbs, tinctures or infusions.

One thought for the road?

Ultimately they’re just drinks.

You’re just trying to make things that are fresh and taste good and are interesting. So the more that you can bring to the table, the better. X

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Send your beer news to avlbeerscout@gmail.com or @avlbeerscout on Twitter

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by Thom O’Hearn

Growling in South Asheville O

Craft Room Opens in South Asheville If you live within 10 minutes of downtown or West Asheville, there’s no shortage of options for fresh growlers of beer. Bruisin’ Ales stocks an ever-changing selection, Asheville Growler and Appalachian Vintner both fill to order and, of course, there are all the breweries.

But head down to Arden and Fletcher, and things change according to Alan Lowe, the owner of Craft Room Growlers. “I live down here, and there are a lot of nice places to sit and order a great beer. But it’s a struggle to find a place that serves fresh beer to take home,” says Lowe. So a few weeks ago Lowe took matters into his own hands and opened Craft Room Growlers in South Asheville.

When you walk in, you are immediately greeted with a small bar and a big wall of taps. “Right now I’m keeping 24 beers on tap and trying to support the North Carolina breweries,” says Lowe. The current list of beers has a wide range of styles with a focus on winter favorites like stouts, porters and winter warmers. However, Lowe says to expect that to change by the season. “I’m a big fan of saisons and IPAs … but a lot of my customers so far love the dark beers,” says Lowe. “I’m going to keep plenty of variety on tap, but also make sure the regulars have the styles they like.”

Pints to stay are mostly $4-$5 and flights of four beers are $4.50. Fills for 32-ounce growlers range from $5-$12, and 64-ounce growlers anywhere from $10-$20. Lowe will swap out Craft Room-brand growlers for cleaned and sanitized growlers. If you bring in another brand, it will take a few minutes for him to prepare the growler, but he will fill it.

Craft Room Growlers is at 1987 Hendersonville Road. Hours are 11 a.m.-8 p.m. Monday-Thursday and 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Friday-Saturday. Check its Facebook page for details on a grand opening party to be held around St. Patrick’s Day.

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Wednesday Asheville Brewing Company: All pints $3 at Coxe location Catawba: New Beer Release: Hop series number 4: Azacca French Broad: $7 growler fills Highland: Live Music: Leigh Glass & Corey Bullman (acoustic), 5:30-7:30pm Hi-Wire: Sideshow Wednesdays smallbatch release LAB: $3 pint night Oskar Blues: Wednesday night bike ride, 6pm Oyster House: $2 off growler fills Wedge: Food Truck: Cecilia’s Culinary Tour; New: Creature Belgian Imperial IPA Thursday Altamont: Live Music: Lilly Maas & The High Life Band (honky-tonk), 9pm

Fill ‘er up: Alan Lowe opened Craft Room Growlers to give beer lovers on the south side of town a place to get fresh brews by the jug. Photo by Jayson Im.

Asheville Brewing Company: All pints $3 at Merrimon location French Broad: Live Music: Small Town Gossip (folk, pop), 6-8pm

Wicked Weed’s Spring Beer Dinners Last year during Beer Week, Wicked Weed hosted an epic beer dinner called “V.” The event quickly sold out, and it’s easy to see why: Five courses were paired with five rare beers from five breweries.

The dinner lasted more than three hours, and even industry celebrities like Sierra Nevada’s Ken Grossman attended.

This year, Wicked Weed has decided that more locals deserve a crack at attending one of its creative beer dinners, so it is hosting three dinners and kicking off with the first one, “Weird Science,” on Tuesday, March 25. As you might expect, the meal will let the teams at Wicked Weed play with flavors and textures using molecular gastronomy and other creative techniques.

According to Chef Cardiff Creasey, “It’s all about the chefs taking inspi-

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ration from the mad scientists downstairs [the brewers]. There are absolutely no restrictions, and we’re going to see how much fun we can have if we take away all the conventions of a classic menu.”

The second dinner will take place on April 29, and the theme is “Brewers vs. Chefs.” The two teams will compete to see who is better at pairing beer with each dish. Every diner will get a vote at the end of the night, deciding which team did a better job. “This style of dinner is perfect for a group of people. ... We expect to see a lot of debate at the tables,” says Creasey. The series will wrap up with the second year of “V” on May 27.

Tickets for the first two dinners are $65 and are available at Wicked Weed Brewing, 91 Biltmore Ave. or on Eventbrite.com. The May dinner will have more details and a ticket release closer to the event. X

LAB: Live Music: Roshambeaux (rock, dance), 9pm Oskar Blues: Live Music: Redleg Husky (Americana, folk), 6pm Pisgah: Live Music: The Screaming J’s (honky-tonk, rag), 8pm Wedge: Food Truck: Tin Can Pizzeria Friday Altamont: Live Music: Tellico (bluegrass), 9pm French Broad: Live Music: Alarm Clock Conspiracy (indie-rock), 6-8pm Highland: Live Music: Wham Bam Bowie Band, 6-8pm; Food Truck: Mama Dukes Wood-Fired Pizza Hi-Wire: Food: Slow Smokin’ Barbeque, 4-11pm Oskar Blues: Live Music: Crooked Pine Band (old-time), 7pm; Firkin Friday: Scotch/Irish Ale Pisgah: Live Music: Dirty Bourbon River Show (circus jazz), 9pm Wedge: Food Truck: Cecilia’s Culinary Tour

Saturday Altamont: Annibeersary party w/ Phuncle Sam (Grateful Dead covers), 9:30pm French Broad: Live Music: Ten Cent Poetry (acoustic, pop), 6-8pm

Hi-Wire: Live Music: Andrew Scotchie of The River Rats (rock, soul, blues), 5-7pm LAB: $10 pitchers

Hi-Wire: Food: English breakfast & soccer, 11am-1pm; Slow Smokin’ Barbeque, 4-11pm

Highland: Live Music: Drake Irish Dance, 5:30-7pm

Pisgah: The Travers Brothership w/ The Hermit Kings (rock, blues, jam), 9pm Food: DOGS Wedge: Food Truck: El Kimchi; Asheville on Bikes: Bike of the Irish ride; Live Music: Plankeye Peggy, 5pm Sunday Altamont: Sunday Funday potluck

Every Week

Monday Altamont: Old-time jam

Oskar Blues: Live Music: This Mountain (folk-rock), 12pm; Bradley Carter of Sanctum Sully, 7pm; Food Truck: Little Bee Thai, 12pm

Full Service Restaurant Meals are served to Mountain Xpress readers

Wedge: Food Truck: Cecilia’s Culinary Tour

Highland: Live Music: Andrew Scotchie & The River Rats, 6-8pm; Food Truck: Mama Dukes Wood-Fired Pizza

LAB: Live Music: Joe Lasher Jr. w/ Leigh Glass (country, Southern rock), 9pm

50,000

French Broad: $2.50 pint night

Hi-Wire: Food: Kettle corn Oskar Blues: Mountain Music Monday Oyster House: $3 pint night Wedge: Food Truck: El Kimchi Wicked Weed: $8 stein refills Tuesday Altamont: Open mic night Asheville Brewing Company: 2 for Tuesday: $2 cans and pizza slices at both locations Hi-Wire: $2.50 house pints Wedge: Food Truck: Tin Can Pizzeria

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Shamrock shake-up Where to wear your green, in and around Asheville

By lea mclellan

lmclellan@mountainx.com

Whether you choose to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day by donning your most flattering shade of green, embarking on a corned beef and cabbage bender or simply practicing a fake Irish accent in public — there’s a place for that in Asheville. And if none of that strikes your fancy, there are a multitude of Irish-themed events throughout the area, including excellent traditional (and not-so-traditional) Irish music performances, a storytelling session from two Irish sisters and a Shamrock-inspired 5K race.

Pick your poison, people, and make sure to check out the Community Calendar and Clubland sections for more St. Patrick’s Day festivities.

Get your holiday off to an early start at Emerald Lounge’s Pre-St. Patty’s Day Bash with Tuatha Dea and The Bare Knuckle Quartet.

Celtic-tribal-Gypsy-rock band, Tuatha Dea describes itself as “pure primal energy with a Celtic and world twist.” Asheville-based Bare

Knuckle Quartet combines traditional music of both the Celtic nations and the Appalachian Mountains — bagpipe included. Tuatha Dea will be recording the performance live, and Loretta’s Kitchen will cater the event, supplying partygoers with traditional Irish cuisine. Friday, March 14, at 8 p.m. $10/$12. emeraldlounge. com.

Like any Celtic pub worth its brew, Jack of the Wood takes the Irish holiday very seriously. The venue has planned three separate events to prep pubgoers for the big day.

My Three Kilts, a Celt-punk band that describes itself as the “dog’s bollocks of the N.C. Celtic scene” will perform at Jack of the Wood’s St. Paddy’s Day Warm-up on Friday, March 14, at 9 p.m. $7. That rabblerousing band will pass the torch

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Tuatha Dea will record its performance live at the Emerald Lounge. Image by Soaring Oak Photography

to French Broad Playboys for the St. Paddy’s Weekend Dance on Saturday, March 15, at 9 p.m. $8. The Playboys are more influenced by Western swing music than the Emerald Isle, but they do guarantee “rump shakin’ good times.” We think our Irish brethren would approve. All of this culminates in Jack of the Wood’s St. Patrick’s Day celebration on Monday, March 17. Doors open at 11 a.m. with traditional Irish and folk music performances throughout the day from the likes of The

Pipe Fitters, The Red Wellies and The Stringtown Ambassadors. Chef Jason Brian will present a special, Irish-themed menu. $10. jackofthewood.com.

Not everyone likes to spend their St. Paddy’s Day kicking back with a Guinness and a plate of boiled meat. Some people prefer to run.

And for those people, there is the Shamrock Run 5K/10K sponsored

by Asheville Catholic School. Don’t forget to bring your green body paint and leprechaun hat, as there will be prizes for the best St. Patrick’s Day costume. Both races take place on Saturday, March 15, at 9 a.m. with a fun run at 8:45 a.m. $10/$30/$35. gloryhoundevents.com.

Cyclists can also work up a sweat at Asheville On Bike’s annual Bike

Grove Arcade 828.225.4133

modestonc.com

Romantic. Farm to Table. Italian.

Jamie Laval (standing, right) performs at the Altamont’s St. Patrick’s Day celebration for the third year running. Image by Stephen Houseworth Photography

of the Irish ride. Participants are encouraged to “wear the green with pride to celebrate spring and bicycle advancement.” The ride takes place Saturday, March 15, at 1 p.m. and culminates at The Wedge for a well-deserved pint and performance from rock ’n’ roll band Plankeye Peggy at 5 p.m.

Free event. ashevilleonbikes.com.

Those looking for a more classic take on festivities should head to The Altamont for fiddle player Jamie Laval’s third annual St. Patrick’s Celebration. “Laval’s unique approach to traditional Celtic music blends the simplicity of an ancient art form with stunning virtuosity and contemporary flair,” according to a press release.

The local musician tours throughout Scotland and the U.S., and has played for Her Majesty the Queen.

His current album, Murmurs and Drones, won the popular vote for Best World Traditional Album in the 2012 Independent Music Awards. Saturday, March 15, at 8 p.m. $20/$22. thealtamont.com.

What better way to celebrate all things Irish than with with a tale well told? And with a stage name like Catherine & Katharine, Sisters Wee Bit Irish, we can be

sure that these ladies are the real deal. From the event description: “With a fiddle and Ball Mason Jars, their instruments of choice, Sisters Wee Bit Irish weave their tales of growing up Irish in the 1950s and ’60s, as threats of entering the nunnery collided with The Beatles. A fast-paced night of music, laughter and master storytelling.” The show is Sunday, March 16, at 3 p.m. at the The Boarding House Venue in Saluda, above the historic Thompson’s Store. Not appropriate for young children. $15. SistersWeeBitIrish.

Brownpapertickets.com.

White Horse Black Mountain — known for its weekly Irish jam sessions — couldn’t let this holiday go unnoticed. The venue lives up to its Éire-friendly reputation with its St. Patrick’s Day party featuring performances from local folk band Noonday Feast and others. Noonday Feast may sound like a hefty meal, but the quartet actually takes its name from an Irish jig — a nod to the band’s strong Celtic influences. Mandolin, violin, bouzouki and bodhrán — an Irish frame drum — are prominent sounds in the band’s multi-instrumental and rich take on Celtic folk. Sunday, March 16, at 5:30 p.m. $15/$18, $10 for kids. whitehorseblackmountain.com. X

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by Toni Sherwood

Toni_sherwood@yahoo.com

Dirty talk Looking for New Orleans-inspired debauchery? Dirty Bourbon River Show delivers.

When self-described Gypsy brass circus rock act Dirty Bourbon River Show shared the bill with funk and soul legend Dr. John, a fellow Crescent City musician, that didn’t happen in New Orleans — it happened in Asheville.

Since its inception, Dirty Bourbon River Show has toured in 39 states.

But North Carolina was one of its early tour stops (including shows at The Grey Eagle, Jack of the Wood and LEAF) because the band’s first manager was based in Greensboro.

And the Asheville area still ranks

who The Dirty Bourbon River Show where Pisgah Brewery, pisgahbrewing.com when Friday, March 14, at 9 p.m. $7 advance/$10 at the door

as a favorite destination. “Asheville is such a progressive town with the whole feeling of oneness there, lots of fantastic art projects, lots of support for the arts and guys out busking,” says vocalist and ringleader Charles “Big Charlie” Skinner.

On the heels of releasing a studio album, Accordion Anthology, Dirty Bourbon River Show returns to Western North Carolina, playing Pisgah Brewing on Friday, March 14. That show promises to be one magical night of New Orleansinspired debauchery.

New Orleans is where the band members originally discovered each other, and that city still informs the band’s sound. Dixieland jazz inspires the forceful brass arrangements, and

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there are hints of both secondline and Mardi Gras marching bands. “New Orleans is like cracking the best book you ever read; it takes you away,” Skinner says.

The band thrives on touring, not only to capture new fan bases, but for the experience itself.

“Go stand next to a mountain in Colorado. It’s good for any artist to feel small every once and a while,” Skinner admits. “Travel will humble your ass.”

So, apparently, will navigating the variety of sonic inspirations driving a quintet. All members (including singer/multi-instrumentalist Noah Adams; Matt Thomas on vocals, saxophones and clarinet; Jimmy Williams on bass and sousaphone; and Dane “Bootsy” Schindler on drums) are encouraged to write their own stuff, so coming together as a band can prove trying. “You have to forgo what you want for the greater good,” Skinner says. “Get five grown-ass men together and try to get them to agree on anything. You have to notch down your ego. You’re not a solo musician creating your own sound.”

Despite that challenge, the band set a lofty goal to release eight albums in four years.

Accordion Anthology is No. 8 — a success that Skinner considers to be just part of the job description.

“We have the ability, we love what we do, none of us have wives or children, and this is our full-time job,” he says. “Two albums worth of stuff — that’s 20 songs in a year’s time. I feel like we should be doing that much.”

Fortunately for the band, Adams is a prolific writer. “It helps that we have a clear and concise leader,” Skinner says.

“A majority of the creative process starts with him.” Typically, Adams will have a creative spark or an idea, which could be a song or a chorus. He’ll bring it to Skinner, and they’ll hash it out before taking it to the rest of the band for embellishment.

Speaking of elaboration, Accordion Anthology includes a couple of tracks with distinctive

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Eight is enough: The Dirty Bourbon River Show set a lofty goal to release eight albums in four years. The band’s tour in support of Accordion Anthology, the final record in that series, comes to Pisgah Brewing this week.

Photo courtesy of the band

rap themes born out of those collaborations. “We all in some way, shape or form have hip-hop influences,” Skinner says. “I’m a fan of Wu-Tang Clan.” Adams and Schindler are influenced by West Coast rap. But the band, according to Skinner, listens to everything, and that amalgamation of influence sometimes manifests as a comedic element in songs like “Jewish Girls,” with its brassy falsetto refrain or the Beat poet-styled “Jibberish Junction.”

With eight albums in the can, the Dirty Bourbon River Show’s next goal is to tour overseas and tap into an international audience.

“You go somewhere new, and it’s like an alien planet,” Skinner says. “The rocks and the dirt and trees are different. You can follow that all the way up to the people, the women and the whiskey they make there.”

But, in a way, the band also carries the spirit of home when on the road. “You go to New Orleans and you throw care to the wind,” Skinner says. “Maybe you do things you shouldn’t do, but it’s the best time of your life.”

He adds, “We want to give people three hours of that.” X

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by Alli Marshall

amarshall@mountainx.com

Conflict resolution Asheville’s Knives and Daggers on the art of dichotomy

Local band Knives and Daggers is many things to many people. But one thing it’s not about is dangerous weaponry — though co-guitarists/songwriters Lauren Carol Brown and Kevin Stanford joke about incorporating knife and dagger imagery into a future show. “A lot of people who come to see us say, ‘We were expecting it to be more hard-core,’” says Stanford.

“But I kind of like the dichotomy of the name versus the music.”

Not that the five-piece experimental outfit (with Jonathan Bass on drums, Jeremy Joachim on bass

who Knives and Daggers with Dead Leaf Echo and Telecine where The Mothlight, themothlight.com when Tuesday, March 18, 9 p.m. $5 advance/$10 at the door

and Sam Hunt on guitar) is entirely benign: The band’s ability to play really loud while also being really melodic is a true double threat.

In fact, the group — which performs at The Mothlight on Tuesday, March 18 — has gone through a sonic evolution since its start in 2006.

Founding member Josh Rhinehart (now with Doomster) thought up the stabby name. Brown was reluctant to change it, despite her background in classical music. And Stanford, who’d previously played in shoegaze bands, says the name is what attracted him.

Both Brown and Stanford say the local music scene has progressed right along with Knives and Daggers’ sound. At first, the crowds weren’t there. But as other bands with com-

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parable styles began to appear, local music fans caught on. “I think Asheville became a great hub for us because of the open-minded audiences and the creativity,” says Stanford. “We all gravitated here, and it became our home base.”

He’s from Athens, Ga., and Charlotte. Brown came from Wilmington, where her mother owns a music school. Growing up, she studied piano and violin, performed in the school orchestra and was part of an ensemble. All that has something to do with why Knives and Daggers has three guitars onstage.

Stanford, who grew up influenced by dream-pop and altrock bands like Slowdive and Spacemen 3, says he was interested in “all things guitar and all things pedals.”

“Knives and Daggers saw that in me, and they were wanting to expand in that way,” he says. He and Brown compose the band’s songs based on their respective strengths, making room for Stanford’s avant-garde dissonance and Brown’s more classical compositions. “A lot of the melody comes from my orchestra background, and Kevin can do his noise stuff over top of that,” Brownsays.

Stanford adds: “There are a lot of guitars and a lot of people. I think that structure is what makes the band work — it’s what makes it come across as beautiful as it does.”

Much of Knives and Daggers’ material is instrumental. That’s another learning curve for some audiences, though Brown says instrumental and shoegaze, both evocative music styles, have gained popularity in recent years because they’re sought out for film scores. Meanwhile, the band has honed its own vision, working slowly but steadily on a follow-up to 2011’s What Hurts the Most.

Recorded by Andrew Larson of Telecine, the new record promises to better represent Knives and Daggers’ live performances.

“Our first record was more string-based and stripped-down,” says Stanford. “When people would come to see us, they’d wonder where that was, but it’s really hard to duplicate live.” Expect more

Sharp attack: “The band has been very fortunate to be able to go on its own path for the past five years without having to compromise anything,” says Kevin Stanford, one of Knives and Daggers’ three guitarists.

Photo courtesy of the band

guitars and more volume this time around, though Brown plays violin, viola and cello on the new recording.

The release date is still a ways off, but Brown and Stanford are already thinking about the future. Though they’ve been more focused on the studio than the stage, Knives and

Daggers is often tapped to share the bill with nationally touring acts (like Brooklyn’s Dead Leaf Echo, who will also appear at The Mothlight). There could be a tour: “We’ll definitely want this record to get heard,” says Stanford. “And then it’s on to more music.” X

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by Hayley Benton

A&E

#Dogdays Momo comes to Malaprop’s See Momo — a cute, 5-year-old border collie with a red bandanna.

Now see Momo disappear into picturesque scenes captured by his owner, Andrew Knapp. Knapp and Momo were stationed in Asheville during January — a brief respite before a tour for Find Momo, Knapp’s photography book starring his canine companion. It came out March 4; the tour brings Knapp back to town on Wednesday, March 19, for a book signing at Malaprop’s.

On Jan. 1, Knapp notified his more than 134,000 (and exponentially

who

Smart dog tricks: Photogenic border collie Momo not only got his couch potato owner into the great outdoors, he launched an Instagram phenomenon and a photography book. Photo courtesy of Andrew Knapp

Andrew Knapp signs copies of Find Momo where Malaprop’s, malaprops.com when Wednesday, March 19, at 7 p.m. Free.

Best Latin Breakfast in Town Open 7 days for Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner Grove Arcade Suite 139 828-350-1332 44

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growing) Instagram followers of his arrival in Western North Carolina, with a post. The photo of Momo — in full head-tilt — next to the VW bus parked beside a gas pump, was captioned, “Happily landed in Asheville where we’ll be hanging out for a month drinking beer and coffee! #newyearsheadtilt.” During the month, the pair were spotted at numerous Asheville locations, and Momo was “found” in photos at The Wedge Brewing Co., Ben’s Tune-Up, among other locales.

“I dig it,” Knapp said about Asheville, during a January interview with Xpress. “I’ve been shooting a little bit here and there, but the sites that I find are usually not the ones that everyone notices.”

Knapp and Momo’s recent popularity happened mostly by accident.

“It started with me taking photos of Momo,” said Knapp, whose self-

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proclaimed “itchy feet” for traveling have taken the two from their native Sudbury in Ontario, Canada, through the United States by mode of a yellow Volkswagen Westfalia.

“He’s just really cute and photogenic. I would go to throw a stick for him, and he would pre-emptively run off and try to figure out where I was going to throw it. He would go ‘hide’ behind a rock or tree, and I would take a picture.”

But now it’s not just Knapp trying to find Momo hidden against weathered brick buildings and in woodland scenes. It’s his thousands of Instagram followers and the soon-to-be fans of his book.

Knapp began to use the hashtag #wheresmo mo, which quickly morphed into #findmomo. Though he no longer uses the tag himself, thousands of his followers comment, “#foundmomo” once they have located the covert canine in the backdrop of Knapp’s photos.

“Originally my Momo concept came from my family,” Knapp said. “One of the reasons I did it was to create a book for my nieces and nephews on Christmas.

I started to save a lot of those

photos, and I gathered the 40 I liked the most, made a little Blurb book online.” Blurb is a self-publishing website, which allowed Knapp to print the first dozen or so Momo books for his friends and family.

“And they really dug it,” he said.

“It started taking off. I started getting calls from publishers, but none of the publishers really impressed me, so I went seeking a publisher myself.” Eventually, Knapp found Quirk Books, a small publishing house based in Philadelphia. Though the company is small, it distributes on a large scale, and “their books are all really fun and quirky and different,” he said.

And while Momo may be earning his owner plenty of attention through social media — even landing the duo in a Sony Xperia commercial on MTV Canada — Knapp says having a semifamous dog makes no difference to him. “I mean, it’s nice when someone recognizes him, and he gets a little extra love,” he said.

“It’s really nice that I get to meet people. It’s just another excuse to connect with people, and I like that about it.” X

kyle.sherard@gmail.com

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Street photography and tattoo art The streets of Asheville serve both as subject and setting for a duo of local art events. PUSH Gallery hosts an exhibition of photographic works by Asheville photographer Anthony Bellemare.

Meanwhile, the annual, weekendlong Asheville Tattoo and Arts Expo expands its footprint to include the Renaissance Asheville Hotel and Masonic Temple.

Street scenes Just Looking: New Portrait Street Photography, an exhibition of works by Asheville photographer Anthony Bellemare, is on view at PUSH Gallery through April 14. The collection highlights both familiar faces and the visual record of an attentive passer-by.

But, at its core, the show is less about Asheville than it is about personal observations, individuals and day-to-day interactions.

Bellemare draws his focus to the people, the place and the pavement itself in three series of untitled, large-scale black-and-white photographs. A set of six 24-by36-inch images offers glimpses of the grooves and grit of the asphalt below. They detail granular physicality: the cracks and stains, slicks of oily water and, more recently, broken chunks of ice.

But it’s their sheer size that morphs these could-be static images into energetic, abstract topographies. Thin, glistening puddles take on marshy qualities in two photos, while the clumpier forms of a chipped and broken traffic lane mimic an aerial perspective of snow-capped mountains in another. Likewise, shards of fractured sidewalk ice offer a bird’s-eye view of a frozen waterway.

Bellemare’s portraits, which are arguably the primary focus of the show, offer little in the ways of technology or time-stamped personal effects. No phones. No gadgets. No period constraints. The collection creates a vein of timelessness. Any single photo could have been taken within the last

50 years. A handful could be from more than 150 years ago.

A few of the usual Asheville street-photography suspects have made their way onto the walls.

There’s the abstracted self-portrait via window reflection and an up-close shot of a bearded man growling through a puff of dense smoke from the cigar pinched between his teeth. There’s also a stripe-socked Gypsy leaning against a wall while wielding an accordion. But the works push past these happenstance encounters to embrace a broader view.

While they’re all inherently in and of a specific moment, the collection reaches toward a deeper understanding of the individual.

The show’s central series includes eight up-close, intimate and simultaneously barren portraits. These images were shot against the same minimalist background — the I.M. Pei building on Biltmore Avenue. It’s that backdrop that dramatizes each figure and further draws attention to the captured personalities. Some eyes lock with both casual embrace and icy stares. Others break away at the last moment, glancing off to the right and left. Cheeks, eyebrows and piercings are propelled forward. Ruffles and wrinkles are monumental. Hats, hair and lapels grab the viewer.

Meanwhile, the concrete background’s pits, cracks and faint lines add just enough texture to each photo to keep the eyes busy while also reviving the atmospheric detail of Bellemare’s ground shots. Those scars imitate bullet holes in two portraits, each featuring military attire. One subject sports a Russian hat and officer’s jacket, circa the 1940s.

The other, a former antiques-mall booth salesman, dons suspenders, a white button-up shirt and steely gray Confederate cap, placing him somewhere in mid-1860s.

Each work offers insight into Bellemare’s efforts to capture, in an instant, a subject’s pure essence of character. But best of all, they

At left, watercolor by Tiffany LeMeaux at Freaks & Geeks Tattoo Sideshow. At right, Untitled, by Anthony Bellemare. Both images courtesy of the artists

instill familiarity in strangers and shroud regular faces in a new anonymity.

Visit Just Looking, on view at PUSH Gallery through Monday, April 14. pushtoyproject.com.

Think ink The third annual Asheville Tattoo and Arts Expo descends on downtown Asheville Friday through Sunday, March 14-16. This year, organizers have added a demo by the Blue Ridge Rollergirls team and a Saturday afternoon food truck showdown to the itinerary.

The expo’s footprint has expanded to include both the Renaissance Asheville Hotel, where hundreds of tattoo artists and aficionados will gather during the three-day event, and the Masonic Temple, where a pop-up art exhibition is slated to take place.

Fine art has always been a part of tattoo culture, and the convention for that matter, according to event organizer J.R. Yarnall of Freaks & Geeks Tattoo Sideshow. “We’ve always tried to include more fine art,” he says. “The expansion into a second location gave us the space for an entire exhibition.”

Of the exhibiting artists, Yarnall says,

“We’ve got folks coming from all over North Carolina and North America, and as far away as Japan.” The popup show features a mix of these visiting tattoo and fine artists showing work alongside local painters Alli Good, Gus Cutty, Gabriel Shaffer and Dustin Spagnola. But what they and the visiting artists will bring to the show is still up in the air: Work for the exhibition will literally be collected and hung on Friday afternoon, adding to the spontaneous nature of the pop-up show.

“I wanted it to be different, so I very intentionally am not putting a central theme on the show,” Yarnall says. “A lot of the work naturally tends toward the lowbrow, or graffiti. At the same time, they have the tattoo niche in the background.” The exhibit opens with a reception on Friday, March 14, at 8 p.m. Proceeds from the sale of artwork benefits ongoing restorations to the Masonic Temple, which was designed by Richard Sharp Smith and built in 1913.

Asheville Tattoo and Arts Expo takes place Friday, March 14, from noonmidnight, and Saturday, March 15, from noon-8 p.m. avl.mx/getiw X

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Johnny Neel

Denise Keirnan After a journalism career with stories in The New York Times and The Wall Street Journal (among others), Asheville-based writer Denise Keirnan turned her attention to the Southeast. Her 2013 book, The Girls of Atomic City: The Untold Story of the Women Who Helped Win World War II, examines the lives of the women (many who were teenagers) recruited to work at the secret city of Oak Ridge, Tenn. Tempted by good wages, the workers were unaware that their jobs contributed to the production of atomic bombs. The Girls of Atomic City is out in paperback this month. Following appearances on C-SPAN, NPR, PBS and Comedy Central’s The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, Keirnan returns to Asheville for a reading at Malaprop’s on Saturday, March 15, at 5 p.m. malaprops.com. Photo of the Oak Ridge workers by Ed Westcott

Fiddlers of Madison County “For centuries — literally — folks have been following the French Broad River into Madison County to hear the finest in traditional music,” says the Madison County Arts Council in a press release. The tradition continues at the eighth annual Fiddlers of Madison County event to benefit the arts council. This year’s show features regional talents Arvil Freeman, Grammy Award-winner, Bobby Hicks with Adam Masters in a show of twin fiddling, Roger Howell, Josh Goforth and The Sons of Ralph, featuring Ralph Lewis. The Junior Appalachian Musicians will also perform at an early show. The fiddlers take the stage on Saturday, March 15, at 3 and 7:30 p.m. at the Madison County Arts Center in Marshall. $20. madisoncountyarts. com. Photo courtesy of the arts council

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Songwriter and musician Johnny Neel is probably best-known for his work with Dickey Betts and Gregg Allman.

Thanks to those relationships, in 1989, Neel was invited to join The Allman Brothers Band. In addition to touring with that group, Neel also lent his other skills: He co-wrote the Allman Brothers’ 1990 hit single “Good Clean Fun.” But Neel (who was born blind) also has a solo career that dates back to age 12, when he recorded his first song, “Talking About People.” His songs have been recorded by Gov’t Mule, John Mayall, Delbert McClinton and Travis Tritt, among others. His most recent album is 2012’s Every Kinda’ Blues But What You’re Used To. Johnny Neel performs at 185 King Street in Brevard, on Friday, March, 14, at 8 p.m. $10 members/$15 nonmembers. 185kingst.com. Photo courtesy of the artist

Imarhan Timbuktu “At dance clubs and private parties in northern Mali, Imarhan Timbuktu [Those Who Love Timbuktu] had provided much of the grooving soundtrack to life over the past 10 years,” according to the band’s bio. That party was interrupted by the arrival of political turmoil in the band’s homeland — conflict that drove group members to refugee camps in neighboring countries. The music, however, continued. Electric guitar mixes with traditional hand drums, and dance and protest music collide to create the band’s contemporary sound, which is inextricable from the traditions of the Sahara. The desert blues band will play at The Mothlight on Monday, March 17, at 9:30 p.m. NYMPH and Green Glass also perform. $8. themothlight.com. Photo courtesy of the band

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by Grady Cooper & Carrie Eidson

would launch a mobile, healthy foods market for low-income communities.

Info: acasparian49@gmail.com or 774-260-0066.

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Comedy Comedian Jarrod Harris • FR (3/14) 7pm & 9:30pm - Held at The Millroom, 66 Ashland Ave. $12/$10 advance. Tickets: avlcomedy.eventbrite. com.

Disclaimer Comedy Info: disclaimercomedy.com or 216-2331.

• WEDNESDAYS, 9pm - Pre-booked open mic. Held at the Dirty South Lounge, 41 N. Lexington Ave. Free.

• FRIDAYS, 7-8pm - Stand-up. Held at Metro Wines, 169 Charlotte St. $10.

Windows, doors and glass ceilings: Photographs and encaustic paintings by Bet Kindley, of Sassafrass Studios in the River Arts district, will be on display in UNC Asheville’s Highsmith Gallery alongside mixed media works by Mary Alice Ramsey. The exhibition, part of the university’s Women’s History Month observance, runs through March 30. (p.49)

Art Artist Syrkl • 3rd SATURDAYS, 3:30-5:30pm - A group for artists to share and support each other's creative projects. Info and directions: 777-1962.

Craft-Made Landscape Artists Open House • SU (3/15), 10am-5pm - With artists John Mac Kah, Alisa Lumbreras and Jason Rafferty. Held in Studio H, 122 Riverside Drive. Info: jmackah@ gmail.com.

Creative Sector Summit • TH (3/20) through SA (3/22) - "Creating Economic Vitality through Arts & Tourism."

Sponsored by Asheville Area Arts Council. Price, info & registration: ashevillearts.com.

National Quilting Day Events Held at the Folk Art Center, MP 382 on the Blue Ridge Parkway. Info: 298-7928 or craftguild.org.

• FR (3/14), 10am-4pm - Quilting techniques. In the lobby.

• SA (3/15), 10am-4pm - Quilt historian will identify time periods of family quilts. In the lobby.

• SU (3/16), 1-3pm - Fiber art exhibit from Modern Quilt Guild. In the auditorium.

Auditions & Call to Artists A CASTING CALL FOR LOCAL FILM (pd.) Now in progress for Swag, an action/adventure/romantic/comedy to be filmed in Asheville.

Local talent only, with or without experience.

Hispanic, African American, white and Asian actors needed. Reply to info@regal-arts.com • For more information, visit www.regal-arts.com

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Auditions for Parkway Playhouse • SA (3/15), 10am-2pm - For MainStage productions for the 2014 season. Held at Mountain Heritage Center, 113 Green Mountain Drive, Burnsville. Registration and info: casting@parkwayplayhouse.com or 682.4285.

BMCA Front Porch Theatre Auditions • TH (2/20), 6-8pm & SA (2/22), noon-2pm - For Greater Tuna & Our Town. Call for a time slot.

Held at 225 W. State St., Black Mountain. Info: 669-0930.

Henderson County Open Studio Tour • Through (5/31) - Registration is open to Henderson County artists. Held Sept. 20-21, 10am-5pm. Info: openstudiotourhc.com.

Hickory Downtown Development Association • Through TU (4/1) - Submissions open for Downtown Hickory Art Crawl. Info: bsinclair@ bellsouth.net or 322-1121.

Montford Park Players Auditions • SA (3/15), 10am-2pm & SU(3/16), 2-4pm - For Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead. Held at Hazel Robinson Amphitheatre, 100 Gay St. Info: info@montfordparkplayers.org.

Music Video Asheville • Through FR (3/14) - Submissions open for Music Video Asheville. Selected entries will be shown at the Diana Wortham Theater in April. Info: musicvideoavl.com.

Transylvania Community Arts Council • ONGOING - Submissions open for 2014.

Themes and deadlines: Outdoors, March 4; Animals, May 6; Potters, June 3; Art Mart, Nov. 10. Info: tcarts.org or 884-2787.

Videographer for Free Food Market • ONGOING - Volunteer videographer needed for Bounty & Soul's Kickstarter campaign. Funds

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Slice of Life • TH (3/13), 8pm - Open comedy mic.

Held at Pulp, below the Orange Peel, 103 Hilliard Ave. $5. Info and booking: sliceoflifecomedy@gmail.com.

Music Danny Barns at Moonlight Mile Studio (pd.) Saturday, March 22, 7:30-9:30 p.m.

Tickets $10. All ages welcome, limited seating. For reservations call (828) 3359316 or go online: www.moonlightmile. com Song O' Sky Chorus (pd.) Tuesday 6:45-9:30 PM Song O' Sky Chorus (Sweet Adelines International) Calvary Baptist Church, 531 Haywood Road, 28806. Asheville's premier a capella barbershop-style chorus! We welcome all women who love to sing! www.songosky org or (866) 824-9547

Mountain Xpress and Sherwood’s Music Present: Our weekly web series showcasing local musicians continues every Thursday. Check our website this week for performance by Asheville band Hank West and the Smokin Hots at Sherwood’s Music.

for CCC students. Tickets and info: broyhillcenter.com or 726-2407.

Theater 35below Located underneath Asheville Community Theatre, 35 E. Walnut St. Info: 254-1320 or ashevilletheatre.org.

• Through SA (3/22) - [title of show]. Thu.Sat.: 7:30pm. $15.

Asheville Area Piano Forum Masterclass • FR (3/14), 10:30am - With pianist Alon Goldstein. Held at First Baptist Church, 5 Oak St. Free. Info: ashevilleareapianoforum.org or 669-4869.

Asheville Community Theatre 35 E. Walnut St. Tickets and info: ashevilletheatre.org or 254-1320.

• FR (3/14) through SU (3/16) - Youth Production Class presents The Hobbit. Fri: 7:30pm; Sat.-Sun.: 2:30pm. $5.

Guitar & Harpsichord Concert • SU (3/16), 3pm - With Amy Brucksch and Barbara Weiss. Held at St. Matthias Church, 1 Dundee St. Free. Info: stmatthiasepiscopal.com or 285-0033.

Barefoot Puppet Theatre • SA (3/15), 11am - Galapagos George. At Diana Wortham Theatre, 2 N. Pack Square. $8. Tickets and info: dwtheatre.com or 257-4530.

Hendersonville Community Band Concert • SU (3/16), 3pm - Held at Blue Ridge Community College's conference hall, Flat Rock. $10. Tickets and info: hbcmusic.com or 715-797-2260.

Catherine & Katharine: Sisters a Wee Bit Irish' • SU (3/16), 3pm - Storytelling performance.

Held at The Boarding House Venue, 24 E. Main St., Saluda. $15. Tickets and info: sistersweebitirish.brownpapertickets.com or 749-2321.

The Paul McKenna Band • TH (3/14), 8pm - Scottish/ Irish traditional. Held at Diana Wortham Theatre, 2 S. Pack Square. $30/$25 students/$15 child.

Info: dwtheatre.com or 257-4530.

Traditional Musicians Showcase • SA (3/15), 7:30pm - Held at Broyhill Civic Center, on the campus of Caldwell Community College. $10/$5 children/free

Flat Rock Playhouse Mainstage: Highway 225, Flat Rock.

Downtown location: 125 South Main St., Hendersonville. Info: flatrockplayhouse.org or 693-0731.

• FR (3/14) through SU (3/23) - Charlotte's Web on the Downtown stage. $18/$10 students. Fri.: 7pm; Sat.: 11am, 2pm, 7pm; Sun.: 2pm.

Gallery DIRECTORY

American Folk Art and Framing Oui-Oui Gallery is located at 64 Biltmore Ave. Mon.-Sat.: 10am-6pm; Sun.: noon-5pm. Info: amerifolk.com or 281-2134.

• Through WE (3/26) - Hallelujah, works by Southern self-taught artists.

Art at UNCA Info: unca.edu.

• Through MO (3/17) - Drawing Discourse, a juried exhibition of contemporary drawing. In the S. Tucker Cooke Gallery.

• Through SU (3/30) - Works by Mary Alice Ramsey and Bet Kindley in the Highsmith University Union gallery.

Art at Warren Wilson College Exhibits are held in Elizabeth Holden Art Gallery, unless otherwise stated. Mon.Fri.: 9am-4pm; Sun.: 1-4pm. Info: warrenwilson.edu.

• Through FR (3/14) - Works by faculty of the Art Department.

Art at WCU Exhibits on display in the Fine Art Museum, unless otherwise noted. Hours: Mon.-Fri., 10am-4pm. Info: fineartmuseum.wcu.edu or 227-3591.

• Through FR (5/9) - Pottery from the private collection of Joan Byrd and George Rector.

• Through MO (3/31) - Good Thoughts Better, mixed media by Edward J. Bisese.

Asheville Art Museum 2 N. Pack Square. Hours: Tues.-Sat.: 10am5pm; Sun.: 1-5pm. Admission: $8/$7 students & seniors/free for children under 4.

Info: ashevilleart.org or 253-3227.

• Through SU (5/18) - Social Geographies: Interpreting Space and Place, mixed media.

• Through (3/25) - Blueprints: A Collaboration, cyanotypes.

• SA (3/15) through SA (6/22) - Pierre Daura: Modernist in the Mountains, paintings. Opening reception: March 16, 3-5pm.

• SA (3/15) through SU (6/2) - Take 10: Collectors’ Circle 10th Anniversary, mixed works. Opening reception: March 16, 3-5pm.

Asheville Gallery of Art 16 College St. Mon.-Sat.: 10am-5:30pm; Sun.: 1-4pm. Info: ashevillegallery-of-art. com or 251-5796.

• Through MO (3/30) - Landscapes in Abstraction, paintings by Karen Keil Brown.

Bella Vista Art Gallery 14 Lodge St. Hours: Mon., Wed., & Thurs.: 11am-4pm; Fri. & Sat.: 11am-5pm. Info: bellavistaart.com or 768-0246.

• Through WE (4/30) - Sacred Places & Dreams, paintings by Christin Zelenka.

Bender Gallery 12 S. Lexington Ave. Mon.-Sat.: 10:30am– 5pm; Sun.: 12-5pm. Info: bendergallery. com.

• SA (3/1) through FR (4/18) - Affinity, glass sculptural works by Kerrick Johnson.

Black Mountain Center for the Arts 225 W. State St., Black Mountain. Hours: Mon.-Fri.: 10am-5pm. Info: blackmountainarts.org or 669-0930.

• MO (3/17) through FR (4/11) - Works by emerging artists in the Upper Gallery.

Black Mountain College Museum + Arts Center 56 Broadway St. Tues. & Wed., noon-4pm; Thurs.-Sat., 11am-5pm. Info: blackmountaincollege.org or 350-8484.

• Through (5/17) - Cynthia Homire: Vision Quest, mixed media.

Blue Spiral 1 38 Biltmore Ave. Mon.-Sat., 10am-6pm, and Sun., noon-5pm. Info: bluespiral1.com or 251-0202.

• Through SA (5/24) - Nancy Kubale, Whimsical ceramic works.

• Through SA (5/24) - Zen, Asian-inspired works.

• Through SA (5/24) - Becky Gray, ceramic sculptures.

• Through SA (5/24) - Duy Huynh, paintings.

• Through SA (5/24) - Narration, mixed media.

Folk Art Center MP 382 on the Blue Ridge Parkway. Hours: 9am-6pm, daily. Info: craftguild.org or 2987928.

• Through TU (4/29) - Works by five Southern Highland Craft Guild members.

• Through SU (5/11) - Eyecatchers: The Hunter Collection, quilts. Discussion with quilter Janice Maddox, March 15, 1-3pm.

• Through FR (3/28) - Exploring the Great Outdoors, mixed media.

Tryon Fine Arts Center Located at 34 Melrose Ave., Tryon. Gallery hours: Tues.-Fri., 10am-4pm; Sat., 10am-1pm.

Info: tryonarts.org or 859-8322.

• Through SA (4/19) - Old Ironsides and the War of 1812, an educational exhibit.

Upstairs Artspace 49 S. Trade St., Tryon. Hours: Tues.-Sat., 11am-5pm. Info: upstairsartspace.org or 859-2828.

• Through FR (3/14) - Figurative paintings by Mark Flowers.

• Through (3/14) - Changing the Focus, photography from the Carolina Camera Club.

• Through (3/14) - Paintings of Southern towns by Andrew Blanchard WICKWIRE fine art / folk art 330 N. Main St., Hendersonville. Info: wickwiregallery.com.

• Through (3/31) - Contemporary Art for Adult Children, works by Susan Webb.

ZaPow! 21 Battery Park, Suite 101. Sun.-Mon., Wed.Thu.: noon-6pm; Fri:. noon-8pm; Sat., noon9pm; Info: zapow.net or 575-2024.

• ONGOING - Creepy Cute, mixed media.

51 Biltmore Ave (828) 232-2838 AloftAshevilleDowntown.com

Hotel Indigo 151 Haywood St. Info: boutiquehotel-asheville.com or 239-0239.

• ONGOING- Paintings by Lelia Canter, Kathleen Kelley and Emily Shields explore human and animal relationships.

Illustration Exhibit by Greg Vineyard • Through (3/31) - Love! Love! Love!.

25 percent of sales donated to YWCA’s MotherLove program. Held at The Hop, 640 Merrimon Ave. Info: gregvineyardillustration. com.

Push Skate Shop & Gallery 25 Patton Ave. Mon.-Thurs., 11am-6pm; Fri. & Sat., 11am-7pm; Sun., noon-6pm. Info: pushtoyproject.com or 225-5509.

• Through MO (4/14) - Portrait/street photography by Anthony Bellemare. Opening reception: March 7, 7pm.

Red House Studios and Gallery 310 W. State St., Black Mountain. Thurs.Sun., 11am-6pm. Info: www.svfalarts.org or 669-0351.

• Through MO (4/28) - Motion Emotion, mixed media.

Riverview Station 191 Lyman St. Info: riverviewartists.com • Through (3/30), 11am-5pm - Art Jewelry Show at Copper Fish Metal Arts, Studio 236.

Sat. & Sun only.

Transylvania Community Arts Council 349 S. Caldwell St., Brevard. Hours: Mon.-Fri.: 9:30am-4:30pm. Info: tcarts.org or 884-2787.

mountainx.com

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

49

C L U B L A N D Tellico (bluegrass), 9pm

Wednesday, Mar. 12

Asheville Music Hall PitchBlak Brass Band w/ PHILO & Empire Strikes Brass Band (brass, funk, rock), 10pm

185 King Street Eric Sommer, 8pm

Athena’s Club Mark Appleford (singer-songwriter, Americana, blues), 7-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am

5 Walnut Wine Bar Hot Point (jazz), 5-7pm Juan Benavides (Latin), 8-10pm Alley Kats Tavern Karaoke w/ Kimbra & Ron, 7:30pm

Boiler Room Sun Brothers, The Headys, Monkey in a Podship & Running on E (rock), 9pm-2am

Ben’s Tune-Up Karaoke w/ The Diagnostics, 10pm

Brevard Brewing Company Andrew Robinson, 7pm

Black Mountain Ale House Bluegrass jam w/ The Deals, 9pm

Bywater Colby Laney & Friends (bluegrass), 9pm

Double Crown DJ Dr. Filth (country), 10pm

Classic Wineseller Pavel Wlosok (jazz), 7pm

Emerald Lounge Blues jam, 8pm

Emerald Lounge Pre-St. Patty’s w/ Tuatha Dea & The Bare Knuckle Quartet (celtic, world), 8pm

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern Bluegrass benefit for Lyons, CO flood relief, 7pm

French Broad Brewery Tasting Room Alarm Clock Conspiracy (indie-rock), 6-8pm

Grind Cafe Trivia night, 7pm Highland Brewing Company Leigh Glass & Corey Bullman (acoustic), 5:30-7:30pm Iron Horse Station Jesse James (Americana), 6-9pm Jack of the Wood Pub Old-time session, 5pm

Green Room Cafe & Coffeehouse Jeff Michels (Americana), 6:30-8:30pm

Rooftop pop, cornfield folk: Citing her influences as “the city, the country, the crowd,” indie-folk-pop artist Julia Weldon will swing down to Asheville from Brooklyn for a night of honest lyrics and catchy beats. Julia will perform with the AJ Usher Band and Even The Animals at The Emerald Lounge on Sunday, March 16, at 8:30 p.m.

Lobster Trap Ben Hovey (dub-jazz, trumpet, electronics), 7pm

Open mic w/ Aaron, 9pm

Olive or Twist Swing dance lessons w/ Bobby Wood, 7-8pm 3 Cool Cats Band (vintage rock ‘n’ roll), 8-11pm

Trailhead Restaurant and Bar Open jam, 6pm

One Stop Deli & Bar Brown Bag Songwriting Competition w/ Alex Krug, 6:30pm Gravy w/ The Horse You Rode In On (funk, soul, jam), 10pm

Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues Blues & soul jam w/ Al Coffee & Da Grind, 8:30pm

Sly Grog Lounge Open mic, 7pm

Vincenzo’s Bistro Aaron Luka (piano, vocals), 7pm

TallGary’s Cantina Open mic & jam, 7pm

Vanuatu Kava Bar Open mic w/ Caleb Beissert, 9pm

Thursday, Mar. 13

The Phoenix Jazz night, 8pm

185 King Street Vagabond Philosophy (indie, folk-rock), 8pm

The Social Karaoke, 9:30pm

5 Walnut Wine Bar Hank West & The Smokin’ Hots (jazz exotica), 8-10pm

Tiger Mountain Thirst Parlour Sean & Will (classic punk, power pop, rock), 10pm

Altamont Brewing Company Lilly Maas & High Life Band (honky-tonk), 9pm

Timo’s House Release w/ Disc-Oh! (bass), 9pm

Ben’s Tune-Up Island dance party w/ DJ Malinalli, 10pm

Town Pump

Black Mountain Ale House Woody Wood (acoustic rock), 9pm

To qualify for a free listing, a venue must be predominately dedicated to the performing arts. Bookstores and cafés with regular open mics and musical events are also allowed / To limit confusion, events must be submitted by the venue owner or a representative of that venue / Events must be submitted in written form by e-mail (clubland@mountainx.com), fax, snail mail or hand-delivered to the Clubland Editor Hayley Benton at 2 Wall St., Room 209, Asheville, NC 28801. Events submitted to other staff members are not assured of inclusion in Clubland / Clubs must hold at least TWO events per week to qualify for listing space. Any venue that is inactive in Clubland for one month will be removed / The Clubland Editor reserves the right to edit or exclude events or venues / Deadline is by noon on Monday for that Wednesday’s publication. This is a firm deadline.

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

Havana Restaurant Ashley Heath (singer-songwriter), 7pm Highland Brewing Company Wham Bam Bowie Band, 6-8pm Hyphen Iggy Radio (jazz, blues, rock), 7-10:30pm

Odditorium Plankeye Peggy, iii (rock), 9pm

50

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern Annabelle’s Curse w/ this mountain (indie), 9pm

Bogart’s Restaurant & Tavern Eddie Rose & Highway Forty (bluegrass), 6:30pm

Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB) Roshambeaux (rock, dance), 9pm

Iron Horse Station Barb Turner (R&B), 7-10pm

Odditorium Death of Kings w/ Wolves and Jackals & Gnarl Scar (metal), 9pm

Isis Restaurant and Music Hall Pierce Edens & The Dirty Work (rock ‘n’ roll, old-time, Americana), 9pm

Olive or Twist Blue Dawg Band (blues, swing, R&B, jump swing), 8-11pm

Jack of the Wood Pub My Three Kilts (celt-punk), 9pm

One Stop Deli & Bar Phish ‘n’ Chips (Phish covers), 6pm Pericles w/ Rims & Keys, Cleofus (ancient, temple, boom, dub), 11pm

Lobster Trap Mark & Aimee Bumgarner (Americana), 7-9pm

Oskar Blues Brewery Redleg Husky (Americana, folk), 6pm Pisgah Brewing Company The Screaming Js (folk), 8pm PULP Slice of Life open mic, 8pm Purple Onion Cafe Nikki Talley (Appalachian roots, folk, old-time), 7:30-9:30pm Root Bar No. 1 Joe Kaplow (roots, rock), 9:30pm Scandals Nightclub Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am The Green Room Bistro & Bar Cameron Stack (blues, soul), 8:30pm

Millroom Jarrod Harris (comedy), 7 & 9:30pm Odditorium Variety show benefit for West Virginia, 9pm Olive or Twist Cha cha lesson w/ Ian, 7:30-8:30pm 42nd Street Jazz Band, 8:30-11:30pm One Stop Deli & Bar Free Dead Fridays w/ members of Phuncle Sam (jam), 5pm Cabinet w/ Bear Down Easy (bluegrass, Americana), 10pm Orange Peel Jim Quick & Coastline (soul, blues), 8pm Oskar Blues Brewery Crooked Pine Band (old-time), 7pm Pack’s Tavern DJ MoTo (pop, dance), 9pm

Brevard Brewing Company Open mic night, 7pm

The Mothlight Hudson K w/ Powerkompany & Stereospread (electronica, poprock, alternative), 9pm

Double Crown DJs Devyn & Oakley, 10pm

Timo’s House Asheville Drum ‘n’ Bass Collective, 9pm

Root Bar No. 1 Frank Hurd Band (Americana, pop), 9:30pm

Emerald Lounge Out Tha Gutta/Only Hope presents: March Madness Party, 8:30pm

Trailhead Restaurant and Bar Open jam, 6pm

Scandals Nightclub Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 1am

French Broad Brewery Tasting Room Small Town Gossip (folk, pop), 6-8pm Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern Blitzen Trapper & Futurebirds (folk), 9pm Havana Restaurant Open mic (instruments provided), 8pm Hyphen Open mic w/ Paul Quick, 6:30-10pm Isis Restaurant and Music Hall Jesse Iaquinto & The Fireside CD release show (folk), 9pm Jack of the Wood Pub Bluegrass jam, 7pm

mountainx.com

Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues The Westsound Revue (Motown, blues), 9pm Vincenzo’s Bistro Ginny McAfee (piano, vocals), 7pm

Friday, Mar. 14

Pisgah Brewing Company Dirty Bourbon River Show (circus jazz), 9pm

Scully’s Riyen Roots Duo w/ Kenny Dore (blues), 9pm DJ, 10pm-2am Southern Appalachian Brewery The Pleasure Chest (blues, garage-rock, soul), 8-10pm Spring Creek Tavern Sarah Tucker (singer-songwriter), 7-10pm

185 King Street Johnny Neel (formerly of the Allman Brothers), 8pm

The Green Room Bistro & Bar Bradley Carter & John Looney (bluegrass), 8:30pm

5 Walnut Wine Bar 3 Cool Cats (rock ‘n’ roll), 9pm-midnight

The Mothlight Ryan Power w/ Bulgogi & Total War (pop, folk, indierock), 9:30pm

Altamont Brewing Company

®

the sociAl Jason Whitaker, 9pm

loBster trAp Crossroads String Band (bluegrass, jazz, blues), 7-9pm

tiger mountAin thirst pArlour Dr. Filth (soul, psych, punk), 10pm

mAin street puB & deli Buick MacKane Band (rock), 8pm

timo’s house CT meets NC Full Blast Tour w/ DJ Whistleblower, Musashi Xero & Midiboss (hip-hop), 9pm

millroom ABC anniversary w/ DJ Kipper, 7pm

tressA’s doWntoWn JAZZ And Blues Ethan Lewis (rock, blues), 7pm The Nightcrawlers (blues, R&B, soul), 10pm vAnuAtu kAvA BAr Seraphim Arkistra (electro-coustic, ambient improv), 9pm vincenZo’s Bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm White horse Joshua Messick (hammered dulcimer), 8pm Wild Wing cAfe A Social Function (acoustic), 9:30pm

sAturdAy, mAr. 15 5 WAlnut Wine BAr Andrew J. Fletcher (piano), 6-8pm Pamela Jones Quartet (jazz), 9pm-midnight AltAmont BreWing compAny Annibeersary party w/ Phuncle Sam (Grateful Dead covers), 9:30pm AltAmont theAter St. Patrick’s Day w/ Jamie Laval & David Brown (celtic), 8pm AthenA’s cluB Mark Appleford (singer-songwriter, Americana, blues), 7-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am BlAck mountAin Ale house Lyric (acoustic, soul), 9pm Boiler room Polly Panic, Ramiee & Screaming By Me (rock), 9pm2am ByWAter Sufi Brothers (Woody Wood & Jason Krekel), 9pm clAssic Wineseller Joe Cruz (Bealtes & Elton John covers), 7pm emerAld lounge St. Patrick’s Day Weekend Celebration w/ Avid Money Entertainment, 8pm french BroAd BreWery tAsting room Ten Cent Poetry (acoustic, pop), 6-8pm grey eAgle music hAll & tAvern Unknown Hinson w/ Fifth on the Floor (psychobilly), 9pm highlAnd BreWing compAny River Rats (rock), 6-8pm hyphen Asheville City Poets (open poetry readings), 1-3pm Hannah Baker (singer-songwriter), 3:30-6pm Young Pine (singer-songwriter), 6-8pm Noah Stockdale, 8:30-10:30pm iron horse stAtion Mark Bumgarner (Americana), 7-10pm isis restAurAnt And music hAll Jonathan Scales Fourchestra & The Galen Kipar Project, 9pm JAck of the Wood puB French Broad Playboys (hillbilly jazz, Western swing), 9pm lexington Ave BreWery (lAB) Joe Lasher Jr. Band w/ The Leigh Glass Duo (Southern rock, roots, folk), 9pm

35% off Select Signature Series ® Window Treatments Ask about our kid-friendly and energy-efficent products!

Free in-home consultation Alan Barnett • Budget Blinds Asheville

828-683-5343

odditorium Luzius Stone dance party, 9pm

BudgetBlinds.com/Asheville abarnett@budgetblinds.com

olive or tWist WestSound Band (rock ‘n’ roll, Motown), 8:30-11:30pm

Doug Norman • Budget Blinds Asheville East

828-668-5811

one stop deli & BAr Reggae Family Jam, 2pm The Royal Tin Foil (gypsy, folk, punk), 10pm

BudgetBlinds.com/AshevilleEast dnorman@budgetblinds.com

onefiftyone Boutique BAr Oso Rey (DJ), 8pm orAnge peel The Infamous Stringdusters w/ Fruition (bluegrass), 9pm oskAr Blues BreWery Bradley Carter of Sanctum Sully, 7pm pAck’s tAvern The Mix (classic hits, rock ‘n’ roll), 9pm pisgAh BreWing compAny The Travers Brothership w/ The Hermit Kings (rock, blues, jam), 9pm purple onion cAfe Deluge (foots, soul), 8-10pm root BAr no. 1 Redleg Husky (Americana), 9:30pm scAndAls nightcluB Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am scully’s DJ, 10pm-2am southern AppAlAchiAn BreWery The Stipe Brothers, Dan Ruiz & Sam Frame (rock, pop), 8-10pm spring creek tAvern Lily & The High Life, 8-11pm the green room Bistro & BAr Porch Crop (bluegrass), 8:30pm

Dinner Menu till 10pm Late Night Menu till

12am

Tues-Sun

5pm–12am

COMING SOON

Wed AN EVENING WITH ONE LEG UP GYPSY/DJANGO JAZZ 3/12 7:15pm • $5 added to tab

Full Bar

Thur JESSE IAQUINTO W/ THE FIRESIDE COLLECTIVE 3/13 CD RELEASE CELEBRATION $5 / $7 • 9pm TAYLOR MARTIN ACOUSTIC BAND IN THE LOUNGE 7pm - 9pm Fri 3/14 PIERCE EDENS AND THE DIRTY WORK $8 / $10 • 9pm Sat SATURDAY CLASSICAL BRUNCH FEAT. GUILFORD COLLEGE 3/15 GUITAR ENSEMBLE FREE • 11am

JONATHAN SCALES FOURCHESTRA & THE GALEN KIPAR PROJECT $10 / $12 • 9pm Wed AN EVENING WITH CHORO DA MANHÃ BRAZILIAN JAZZ 3/19 Sat 3/15

7:15pm • $5 added to tab

Every Sunday JAZZ SHOWCASE 6pm - 11pm • $5 Every Tuesday BLUEGRASS SESSIONS 7:30pm - midnite

the mothlight Burning Bus w/ Zombie Queen & Bad Fog (garage-rock, punk), 9:30pm the sociAl Karaoke, 9:30pm tiger mountAin thirst pArlour DJ Devyl’s Hands (psychedelic, indie, metal, rock), 10pm

743 HAYWOOD RD • 828-575-2737 • ISISASHEVILLE.COM

timo’s house Skymatic, DLX (live electronic, hip-hop), 9pm toy BoAt community Art spAce Asheville Vaudeville, 7:30pm tressA’s doWntoWn JAZZ And Blues Ruby Mayfield & The Friendship Train (blues), 10pm vincenZo’s Bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm WAter’n hole Humps & The Blackouts (outlaw country), 8pm White horse Asheville Jazz Orchestra (big band, swing), 8pm

sundAy, mAr. 16 5 WAlnut Wine BAr The Get Right Band (funk, dirty blues), 7-9pm

MountAinx.CoM

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

51

CLUBLAND

Send your listings to clubland@mountainx.com.

CLUB DIRECTORY

Asheville Music Hall Aligning Minds w/ Phutureprimitive, Hi-Alta & Big Ben (electronic), 10pm Ben’s Tune-Up Vinyl night (open DJ collective)

BIG ST.Sarah PADDYS DAY WEEKEND 10/25 Lee Guthrie & Johnny Irion 3/14 My Three Kilts - SAINT PATTYS DAY WEEKEND WARMUP 9PM w/ Battlefield • 9pm $10 10/26 Jazz Band 3/15 St.Firecracker Paddy’s Day Weekend W/ THE FRENCHCostume BROAD PLAYBOYS 9PM Dance & HALLOWEEN Party & Contest • 9pm $8 3/16 Traditional Irish Session 10/27SAINT Vinegar CreekDAY • 9pm FREE 3/17 PATRICKS 10/28CELEBRATION Mustard Plug • 9pm $8 2014 w/w/ The Pipe Tom FittersBanana (celtic folkPants rock) / Crazy The Red Wellies (traditional irish w/ stomping fun & humor)/traditional irish 10/29 Singer Songwriters session music/Stringtown Ambassadors in the Round • 7-9pm FREE (old timey irish fiddle & mandolin tunes w/ Anthony starting at noon) Tripi, Elise Davis

Mud • 9pm EVENT FREE 11AM TIL..

ALL DAYTea & NIGHT

w/ traditional irish at music throughout.

Open Mon-Thurs 3 • Fri-Sun at Noon Join SUN Jack for a real irish celebration Celtic Irish Session 5pm tiland ? aMON special delicious award5pm Quizzo!

7-9p menu • WEDfrom Old-Time winning Jason Brian 1st & 3rd TUES SINGER chef SONGWRITERS THURS Bluegrass Jam 7pm Open Mon-Thurs at 3 • Fri-Sun at Noon

95 Patton at Coxe • Asheville 252.5445 • jackofthewood.com

Black Mountain Ale House Jazz brunch w/ Mike Gray Trio, 11:30am Double Crown Karaoke w/ Tim O, 9pm Emerald Lounge AJ Usher Band w/ Julia Weldon & Even The Animals (folkrock, indie), 8:30pm Hi-Wire Brewing Andrew Scotchie of The River Rats & guests (rock, soul, blues), 5-7pm Hyphen Dan Lewis (singer-songwriter), noon-2pm Quickchester (rock), 2-5pm Iggy’s open acoustic porch jam, 5-7:30pm Iron Horse Station Mark Shane (blues), 5-8pm Isis Restaurant and Music Hall Jazz showcase, 6pm Jack of the Wood Pub Irish session, 5pm Lobster Trap Leo Johnson (hot club jazz), 7-9pm Odditorium Des Ark, Lonesome Leash, Holy Holy Vine (acoustic, rock), 9pm Olive or Twist Shag & swing dance lesson w/ John Dietz, 7-8pm DJ Mike Filippone (beach, swing), 8-10pm One Stop Deli & Bar Bluegrass brunch w/ The Pond Brothers, 11am Orange Peel Indigo Girls w/ Hannah Thomas (folk-rock), 9pm Scandals Nightclub Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am Southern Appalachian Brewery Todd Hoke (singer-songwriter, Americana, folk), 5-7pm

TAVERN DOWNTOWN ON THE PARK Eclectic Menu • Over 30 Taps • Patio 13 TV’s • Sports Room • 110” Projector Event Space • Shuffleboard • Darts Open 7 Days 11am - Late Night

JOIN US FOR ST. PACKTRICKS DAY!

FRI. 3/14

DJ Moto (dance, pop hits) SAT. 3/15

“The Mix” 96.5 House Band (rock n’ roll, classic hits)

Your Headquarters for

March Madness 13 Big Screen TVs & Great Drink Specials!

20 S. SPRUCE ST. • 225.6944 PACKSTAVERN.COM 52

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

mountainx.com

Spring Creek Tavern Mark Bumgarner (Americana), 1-4pm The Mothlight Xambuca w/ Pincushioned & Tann Jones (electronic, experimental), 9pm The Social ‘80s night, 8pm Vincenzo’s Bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm White Horse St. Patrick’s Day party & concert, 5:30pm

Monday, Mar. 17 185 King Street Trivia night w/ Spencer Jones & Evan Smith, 8pm 5 Walnut Wine Bar Sufi Brothers (folk), 8-10pm Alley Kats Tavern Open mic, 8pm Altamont Brewing Company Old-time jam, 7pm Black Mountain Ale House Karaoke, 9pm Bywater Open mic w/ Taylor Martin, 9pm Courtyard Gallery Open mic (music, poetry, comedy, etc.), 8pm Double Crown Punk ‘n’ roll w/ DJ Leo Delightful, 10pm Jack of the Wood Pub Quizzo, 7-9pm St. Patrick’s Day Celebration w/ The Pipe Fitters (celtic folkrock), The Red Wellies (Irish), Traditional Irish Session Music, Stringtown Ambassadors (old-time, Irish), 11am-10pm Odditorium Open dance night, 8pm

185 King Street 877-1850 5 Walnut Wine Bar 253-2593 Altamont Brewing Company 575-2400 The Altamont Theatre 348-5327 Apothecary (919) 609-3944 Aqua Cafe & Bar 505-2081 ARCADE 258-1400 Asheville Civic Center & Thomas Wolfe Auditorium 259-5544 Asheville Music Hall 255-7777 Athena’s Club 252-2456 Barley’s Tap Room 255-0504 Black Mountain Ale House 669-9090 Blue Mountain Pizza 658-8777 Boiler Room 505-1612 Broadway’s 285-0400 The Bywater 232-6967 Cork and keg 254-6453 Club Hairspray 258-2027 Club Remix 258-2027 Creekside Taphouse 575-2880 Adam Dalton Distillery 367-6401 Diana Wortham Theater 257-4530 Dirty South Lounge 251-1777 Double crown 575-9060 Eleven on Grove 505-1612 Emerald Lounge 232- 4372 Firestorm Cafe 255-8115 French Broad Brewery Tasting Room 277-0222 Good Stuff 649-9711 green room cafe 692-6335 Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern 232-5800 Grove House The Grove Park Inn (Elaine’s Piano Bar/ Great Hall) 252-2711 hangar lounge 684-1213 Harrah’s Cherokee 497-7777 Highland Brewing Company 299-3370 Isis music hall 575-2737 Jack of Hearts Pub 645-2700 Jack of the Wood 252-5445 Lexington Avenue Brewery 252-0212 The Lobster Trap 350-0505 Metroshere 258-2027 Millroom 555-1212 Monte Vista Hotel 669-8870 Native Kitchen & Social Pub (581-0480) odditorium 505-8388 OneFiftyone 239-0239 One Stop Bar Deli & Bar 255-7777 O.Henry’s/TUG 254-1891 The Orange Peel 225-5851 oskar blues Brewery 883-2337 Pack’s Tavern 225-6944 The Phoenix 877-3232 Pisgah Brewing Co. 669-0190 Pulp 225-5851 Purple Onion Cafe 749-1179 Red Stag Grill at the Grand Bohemian Hotel 505-2949 Root Bar No.1 299-7597 Scandals Nightclub 252-2838 Scully’s 251-8880 SLy Grog Lounge 255-8858 Smokey’s After Dark 253-2155 the social 298-8780 Southern Appalacian Brewery 684-1235 Static Age Records 254-3232 Straightaway Cafe 669-8856 TallGary’s Cantina 232-0809

tiger mountain thirst parlour 407-0666 Timo’s House 575-2886 Town Pump 357-5075 Toy boat 505-8659 Treasure Club 298-1400 Tressa’s Downtown Jazz & Blues 254-7072 Vanuatu Kava Bar 505-8118 VINCENZO’S 254-4698 Wall Street Coffee House 252-2535 Westville Pub 225-9782 White Horse 669-0816 Wild Wing Cafe 253-3066 wxyz 232-2838

Orange Peel Children of Bodom w/ Death Angel & Tyr (metal), 8pm Scully’s Triva night, 9-11pm The Mothlight Knives & Daggers w/ Dead Leaf Echo & Telecine (postrock), 9pm The Social Big Generator (rock, blues), 7-9pm Timo’s House ‘90s night w/ DJ Ra Mak (90s dance, hip-hop, pop), 9pm Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues Pauly Juhl & Oso, 8:30pm Vincenzo’s Bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm Westville Pub Blues jam, 10pm White Horse Irish sessions, 6:30pm Open mic, 8:45pm

Orange Peel The Glitch Mob w/ Ana Sia & Penthouse Penthouse (electronic), 9pm Oskar Blues Brewery Mountain Music Mondays (open jam), 6pm The Mothlight Imarhan Timbuktu w/ NYMPH & Green Glass (world, psych, noise, jazz), 9:30pm Tiger Mountain Thirst Parlour Honky-tonk (classic country & rockabilly) w/ DJ Lil Lorruh & David Wayne Gay, 10pm

Wednesday, Mar. 19 5 Walnut Wine Bar Sufi Brothers (folk), 5-7pm Juan Benavides (Latin), 8-10pm Alley Kats Tavern Karaoke w/ Kimbra & Ron, 7:30pm Ben’s Tune-Up Karaoke w/ The Diagnostics, 10pm

Vincenzo’s Bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm

Black Mountain Ale House Bluegrass jam w/ The Deals, 9pm

Water’n Hole DJ Sidethree St. Patty’s Party, 8pm

Double Crown DJ Dr. Filth (country), 10pm

Westville Pub Trivia night, 8pm

Emerald Lounge Blues jam, 8pm

Tuesday, Mar. 18 185 King Street Salsa lesson, 8pm 5 Walnut Wine Bar The John Henry’s (ragtime), 8-10pm Alley Kats Tavern Bluegrass Tuesday, 8pm Altamont Brewing Company Open mic w/ Chris O’Neill, 8pm Ben’s Tune-Up Dance party w/ DJ Rob, 10pm Black Mountain Ale House Trivia, 7pm Club Eleven on Grove Dance, 8:30-11pm Creekside Taphouse Bluegrass jam, 7pm

Grind Cafe Trivia night, 7pm Iron Horse Station Jesse James (Americana), 6-9pm Isis Restaurant and Music Hall Choro da Manha (world, Brazillian jazz), 7:15pm Jack of the Wood Pub Old-time session, 5pm

Odditorium Iron Reagan, MRSA, Uninhabitable & Prick Bigot (punk), 9pm Olive or Twist Swing dance lesson w/ Bobby Wood, 7-8pm 3 Cool Cats Band (vintage rock ‘n’ roll), 8-11pm One Stop Deli & Bar Brown Bag Songwriting Competition w/ Alex Krug, 6:30pm The Mug (blues, rock), 10pm

Double Crown Punk ‘n’ roll w/ DJs Sean and Will, 10pm

Orange Peel Motionless in White w/ Like Moths to Flames, For the Fallen Dreams & The Defiled (metal), 7:30pm

Emerald Lounge King Leo w/ William Z. Villain (experimental, gypsy jazz), 8:30pm

Sly Grog Lounge Open mic, 7pm

Iron Horse Station Open mic, 6-9pm

TallGary’s Cantina Open mic & jam, 7pm

Isis Restaurant and Music Hall Bluegrass session, 7:30pm

The Mothlight Saint Rich w/ Jenny Besetzt & Doc Aquatic (rock, indie), 9pm

Jack of the Wood Pub Singer-songwriters, 7pm Kevin Scanlon The Irish Rover, 9pm

The Phoenix Jazz night, 8pm

Lobster Trap Jay Brown (Americana, folk), 7-9pm Millroom July Talk w/ The Go-Devils & Emily Easterly (indie-rock), 9pm Odditorium Comedy open mic w/ Tom Peters, 9pm One Stop Deli & Bar Tuesday night techno, 10pm

Wednesday, March 12th

Lobster Trap Ben Hovey (dub-jazz, trumpet, electronics), 7pm

The Social Karaoke, 9:30pm Tiger Mountain Thirst Parlour Sean & Will (classic punk, power pop, rock), 10pm Timo’s House Release w/ Disc-Oh! (bass), 9pm Town Pump Open mic w/ Aaron, 9pm Trailhead Restaurant and Bar Open jam, 6pm

AVL Blues Jam • 8pm-12pm • FREE! Thursday, March 13th

Out Tha Gutta / Only Hope presents March Madnes Party! (Hip-Hop) • Free!

Friday, March 14th Pre St. Patty’s Day Bash! (Celtic, Tribal, World) Tuatha Dea (Live Rec.) & Bare Knuckle Quartet **$10 Advance/$12 Door** Saturday, March 15th Avid Money Ent. presents St. Patty’s Day Celebration feat. over 15 acts! (hip-hop, blues, R&B & Comedy) • FREE! Sunday, March 16th A.J. Usher Album Release w/ Even the Animals & Julia Weldon•FREE! Monday, March 17th Muckety-Mutts Mon. Mixer! Dogs welcome!

10% of bar + donations go to Animal Haven!

EVERY Mon. 5-7 PM FREE! Also....

Simply Pickin’ - Blugrass Jam - 8-12pm FREE! Tues, March 18th Aaron “Woody” Wood w/ The Emerald Blues Band & William Z. Villain (blues, americana) • $7

mountainx.com

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

53

CLUBLAND

SAtuRdAy cHicken & WAffleS Sunday Brunch

Send your listings to clubland@mountainx.com.

31 PATTON AVENUE-UPSTAIRS

504 Haywood Rd. West Asheville • 828-255-1109 “It’s bigger than it looks!”

one stop

pinball, foosball, ping-pong & a kickass jukebox kitchen open until late

The Brown Bag Songwriting

one stop one stop

55 COLLEGE STREET-DOWNSTAIRS

Gravy w/ The Horse You Rode

MAR

12 Competition Hosted By Alex Krug WED MAR

6:30 PM $3 to enter, Free to watch All ages

12 In On WED

9:30PM $5 Ages: 21+

MAR Pericles w/ Rims & Keys 13 and Cleofus 11 PM $5 21+ THU MAR

PitchBlak Brass Band w/ Philo feat.

AMH

14 Empire Strikes Brass Band FRI 10 PM $8/$10

21+

one stop one stop

MAR

w/ Bear Down Easy 14 Cabinet 10 PM $7/$10 21+ FRI

MAR

The Royal Tin Foil w/ The Crow

15 Quill Night Owls 10 PM SAT MAR

$5/$7 21+

Waveforms feat. Aligning Minds

OPEN FOR LUNCH M-F 11-3PM wed 3/12

lyons Colorado relief benefit show

MAR

10 PM $12/$15 21+

one stop

AMH

16 Phutureprimitive, Hi-Alta& Big Ben SUN Two For Tuesday: Daphne Lee Martin

11 and James Maple 8 PM TUE

$2 All Ages

A S H E V I L L E MUSICHALL . COM

featuring Casey driessen, billy Cardine, Mary lucey, barrett smith, members of town Mountain & others

blitzen trapper and futurebirds w/ analog Moon 9pm • $15/17

fri 3/14

annabelle’s Curse

sat 3/15

unknown hinson w/ fifth on the floor

9pm • $8/$10

9pm • $15/18

wheeler brothers and desert noises 9pm • $10/12

yarn w/ Caravan

fri 3/21

of thieves 9pm • $10/12

sat 3/22

floodwood w/ sanctum sully

thurs. mar 13

Roshambeaux

5 Walnut Wine Bar The Crow Quill Night Owls (jug band, jazz), 8-10pm Adam Dalton Distillery Bridging the Gap (old school hip-hop, vinyl night), 10pm-2am

backstage • 9:00PM • $6 thurs. mar 20

Asheville Music Hall Arpetrio w/ Dank Sinatra (electronica, groove, rock), 10pm

Joe LasheR JR.

comedian ben kRonbeRg

backstage • 9:00PM • $8 thurs. mar 27

the fRiendLy beasts w/ stuaRt Johnson

backstage • 9:00PM • $6 thurs. aPr 10

haRd Rocket w/ POsH HaMMeR

backstage • 9:00PM • $6 fri. aPr 14 backstage • 8:30PM • $8

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

185 King Street Reclaimed w/ Darby Wilcox, 8pm

backstage • 9:00PM • $6 sat. mar 15

Reagan boggs w/ the coal men

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Vanuatu Kava Bar Open mic w/ Caleb Beissert, 9pm

Thursday, Mar. 20

thu 3/13

9pm • $12/14

Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues Blues & soul jam w/ Al Coffee & Da Grind, 8:30pm

Vincenzo’s Bistro Aaron Luka (piano, vocals), 7pm

8pm • $10/$12

thu 3/20

Working Together: Coming from Johnson City, Tenn., this mountain describes itself as “a collaborative group of friends and musicians making lovely folk-rock tunes for themselves and others.” The group will open for indie-folk band and fellow Tennesseans Annabelle’s Curse at The Grey Eagle on Friday, March 14, at 9 p.m.

mountainx.com

Altamont Brewing Company Josh Daniel Marc Shimmick Project (bluegrass), 9pm

Ben’s Tune-Up Island dance party w/ DJ Malinalli, 10pm Black Mountain Ale House Woody Wood (acoustic rock), 9pm Brevard Brewing Company Open mic night, 7pm Double Crown DJs Devyn & Oakley, 10pm Emerald Lounge Crazy Tom Banana Pants w/ Demon Waffle (ska), 8:30pm French Broad Brewery Tasting Room Matt Walsh (rock, blues), 6-8pm Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern Wheeler Brothers & Desert Noises (rock, folk, Americana), 9pm

Bluegrass jam, 7pm Lexington Ave Brewery (LAB) Ben Kronenberg (comedy), 9pm Odditorium Roz & The Rice Cakes w/ Impossible Vacation (rock, punk), 9pm Olive or Twist Blue Dawg Band (jazz, swing), 8-11pm One Stop Deli & Bar Phish ‘n’ Chips (Phish covers), 6pm Orange Peel Badfish (Sublime tribute), 9pm Pisgah Brewing Company Hank West & The Smokin’ Hots (jazz, swing), 8pm Purple Onion Cafe Scoot Pittman (singer-songwriter), 7:30-9:30pm Scandals Nightclub Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 12:30am The Chop House Whitewater Bluegrass Company (bluegrass), 6:30pm The Mothlight New Bums w/ Tashi Dorji (psych-folk), 9pm Timo’s House Asheville Drum ‘n’ Bass Collective, 9pm Trailhead Restaurant and Bar Open jam, 6pm Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues The Westsound Revue (Motown, blues), 9pm Vincenzo’s Bistro Ginny McAfee (piano, vocals), 7pm

Friday, Mar. 21

Havana Restaurant Open mic (instruments provided), 8pm

185 King Street Brian Phillips & Lee Griffin Blues party, 8pm

Hyphen Open mic w/ Paul Quick, 6:30-10pm

5 Walnut Wine Bar Firecracker Jazz Band (hot jazz), 9pm-midnight

Isis Restaurant and Music Hall ArtSpace Annual After Hours Cabaret, 6pm

Altamont Brewing Company Hick Child Soup w/ Mercer Johnson (folk-rock), 9pm

Jack of the Wood Pub

Asheville Music Hall

wednesday • March 12th Earphunk w/ Bubonik Funk & Porch 40 (prog-funk), 10pm Athena’s Club Mark Appleford (singer-songwriter, Americana, blues), 7-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am Boiler Room The Wormholes, Donnie Dies & PMA (rock), 9pm-2am Classic Wineseller Bohemian Jean w/ Jessi Stone & Matt Welborn (60s, soul), 7pm Club Eleven on Grove DJ Jam (old-school hip-hop, R&B, funk), 9pm Emerald Lounge DTCV w/ Spaceships & Alarm Clock Conspiracy (indie), 8:30pm French Broad Brewery Tasting Room Nikki Talley (alt-country, Americana), 6-8pm Green Room Cafe & Coffeehouse Carrie Morrison & Steve Whiteside (Americana), 6:308:30pm Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern Yarn w/ Caravan of Thieves (Americana, alt-country), 9pm Havana Restaurant Ashley Heath (singer-songwriter), 7pm Hyphen Iggy Radio (jazz, blues, rock), 7-10:30pm Iron Horse Station Andy Buckner (Southern rock, country), 7-10pm Isis Restaurant and Music Hall Dr. Lonnie Smith (acid jazz), 9pm Jack of the Wood Pub Johnson’s Crossroad (Appalachian soul) w/ Cincinnati Folk Singer & His Uptown Band, 9pm Odditorium Northless w/ Autarch (punk, metal), 9pm Olive or Twist Cha cha lesson w/ Ian, 7:30-8:30pm 42nd Street Jazz Band, 8:30-11:30pm One Stop Deli & Bar Free Dead Fridays w/ members of Phuncle Sam (jam), 5pm Mustacheville: Spring Equinox Celebration & Fundraiser (electronic), 10pm OneFiftyOne Boutique Bar Red Hot Sugar Babies (jazz, blues), 8pm Pack’s Tavern DJ Moto (dance, pop, hits), 9pm Pisgah Brewing Company Phuncle Sam (Grateful Dead covers), 9pm Scandals Nightclub Dance party, 10pm Drag show, 1am Scully’s DJ, 10pm-2am Spring Creek Tavern Mark Shane & Kevin Reese (blues), 8-11pm The Green Room Bistro & Bar John Owen & Friends (bluegrass), 8:30pm Tiger Mountain Thirst Parlour Dr. Filth (soul, psych, punk), 10pm Timo’s House Inner Space Massive IV: The Emerald Curtain, Bombassic, Dleta Quadrant, Spaghettiman (bass), 9pm Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues Emily Pettit & Friends, 7pm Al Coffee & Da Grind (blues, soul), 10pm

Athena’s Club Mark Appleford (singer-songwriter, Americana, blues), 7-10pm DJ, 10pm-2am Black Mountain Ale House Bruckshot w/ members of Chalwa (reggae), 9pm Classic Wineseller Joe Cruz (Bealtes & Elton John covers), 7pm Emerald Lounge Depth Perception w/ Rasa & The Wolf (alt-rock), 8:30pm French Broad Brewery Tasting Room Leigh Glass & The Hazards (blues, rock), 6-8pm Green Room Cafe & Coffeehouse Lynn Goldsmith (singer-songwriter), 6:30-8:30pm

Hyphen Billy Lintz, 3-6pm Hannah Rebekah (indie-pop, singer-songwriter), 6-8pm Brief Awakening (indie, psychedelic folk, Americana), 8-10:30pm Iron Horse Station Sarah Tucker (singer-songwriter), 7-10pm Isis Restaurant and Music Hall The Stray Birds (folk, Americana), 9pm

Over 40 Entertainers!

A True Gentleman’s Club

20% OFF of Any One Item MUST PRESENT COUPON. LIMIT ONE PER CUSTOMER. EXP. 04/30/14

50 Shades of Grey

Jack of the Wood Pub Underhill Rose (country, soul), 9pm Millroom PigPen Theatre Co. (indie-folk), 8pm

TRILOGY BOOKS & ACCESSORIES

Moonlight Mile Danny Barnes, 7:30-9:30pm Odditorium Yard sale, 10am Metal Night: Through the Fallen, Temptations Wings, Twist of Fate, 9pm

PLUS SIZE LINGERIE

Olive or Twist 3 Cool Cats Band (vintage rock ‘n’ roll), 8:30-11pm

$19.99 BOGO DVDS

One Stop Deli & Bar Reggae Family Jam, 2pm Kings of Belmont & Peoples Blues of Richmond (rock, psychedelic, blues), 10pm

DVD RENTALS ALSO AVAILABLE

Orange Peel Cherub w/ Carousel & ProbCause (electro-pop, funk, indie), 9pm Oskar Blues Brewery Riyen Roots Duo w/ Kenny Dore (blues), 7pm Pack’s Tavern Lyric (funk, pop, soul), 9pm Pisgah Brewing Company Melodime w/ JD Eicher & Charlie Oxford (indie, Americana), 9pm Purple Onion Cafe Eve Haslam & Satin Steel Jazz, 8-10pm Scandals Nightclub Dance party, 10pm; Drag show, 12:30am Scully’s DJ, 10pm-2am Spring Creek Tavern Nikki Tally, 8-11pm The Green Room Bistro & Bar CaroMia Tiller (singer-songwriter), 8:30pm The Mothlight Lindi Oretega (blues, traditional country), 9pm

Vincenzo’s Bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm

Tiger Mountain Thirst Parlour DJ Devyl’s Hands (psychedelic, indie, metal, rock), 10pm

Wild Wing Cafe A Social Function (acoustic), 9:30pm

Timo’s House St. Maurice (rock), 9pm

38 N. French Broad

6.95 DVD SALE!

$

Grey Eagle Music Hall & Tavern Floodwood w/ Sanctum Sully (string band, bluegrass), 9pm

The Social Karaoke, 9:30pm

185 King Street Wild Ponies (Americana), 8pm

leigh glass & corey BullMan 5:30-7:30PM friday • March 14th whaM BaM Bowie Band 6-8PM saturday • March 15th river rats 6-8PM

5 Walnut Wine Bar Andrew J. Fletcher (piano), 6-8pm One Leg Up (soul, funk), 9pm-midnight

Vanuatu Kava Bar Samuel Paradise (live ambient electronica), 9pm

Saturday, Mar. 22

acoustic wednesday & cask release featuring

Dumpstaphunk (funk, soul), 9pm

Tressa’s Downtown Jazz and Blues WestSound (Motown, blues, R&B), 10pm Vincenzo’s Bistro Steve Whiddon (old-time piano, vocals), 5:30pm Water’n Hole Owner of the Sun (rock, bluegrass), 8pm

BACHELOR PARTY & BIRTHDAY PARTY SPECIALS

EVERY UFC FIGHT

GREAT DRINK SPECIALS EVERY NIGHT

Mon – Thurs 6:30pm–2am | Fri – Sat 6:30pm–3am

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DOES NOT INCLUDE UFC NIGHTS

SUN-THUR 8 AM - MIDNIGHT FRI SAT 8 AM - 3 AM (828) 684-8250

½ OFF COVER CHARGE 520 Swannanoa River Rd • Asheville (828) 298-1400 • TheTreasureClub.com facebook.com/thetreasureclub

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mountainx.com

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

55

M O V I E S C

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by Ken Hanke & Justin Souther

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HHHHH = max rating contact xpressmovies@aol.com

PICK OF THE WEEK

THEATER LISTINGS

Like Father, Like Son HHHHS

Friday, March 14 Thursday, March 20 Due to possible scheduling changes, moviegoers may want to confirm showtimes with theaters.

Director: Hirokazu Koreeda (Still Walking) Players: Masaharu Fukuyama, Machiko Ono, Yoko Maki, Rirî Furankî

Asheville Pizza & Brewing Co. (254-1281) Please call the info line for updated showtimes.

The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (PG-13) 12:00, 3:30, 7:00, 10;15 Carmike Cinema 10 (298-4452)

drama Rated nR The Story: Two families have to deal with the fact that their 6-year-old boys were switched at birth.

The Lowdown: Delicate, intensely moving family drama with strong performances — a subtle, yet provocative exploration of what it means to be a family and what makes a father.

Japanese filmmaker Hirokazu Koreeda is unknown to me. He has an impressive filmography of highly regarded films — most of which seem to hinge on families and children — but none of them have previously penetrated the wilds of Asheville. This isn’t all that surprising — Asian cinema without large doses of action has not traditionally done well here, and Mr. Koreeda’s new film, Like Father, Like Son, is certainly not action-packed.

It’s a domestic drama, albeit one with occasional outcroppings of melodrama, and it centers on what can only be described as a hoary literary premise (children switched at birth). It also comes perilously close to the workaholic-dad subgenre that permeates American family comedies. But if you’re willing to stick with it, it’s a film of great nuance and substance that sucks you into its story without apparent effort.

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MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

Masaharu Fukuyama and Keita Ninomiya in Hirokazu Koreeda’s moving family drama Like Father, Like Son.

The film focuses on an upscale family: successful architect father and husband Ryota (Masaharu Fukuyama), his wife Midorino (Machiko Ono) and their 6-year-old son, Keita (Keita Ninomiya). Ryota is often absent, yet he demands a possibly too-strict sense of order.

That structure is shattered when it turns out that Keita is not their child and that he and another baby were switched at birth. The hospital (anxious to deal with this quickly, quietly and cheaply) is of the opinion that the two couples should reclaim their rightful children — but for the families, it raises other issues. Ryota comes to believe that this explains why Keita isn’t capable of living up to Ryota’s image of him. It also eats away at the marriage.

mountainx.com

Things get more complicated when the two families meet. The other family is headed by Yudai (Rirî Furankî), a good-natured, lower-class “regular guy” who ekes out a meager living with his rundown appliance and fix-it store.

He is about as different from Ryota as possible, as is his approach to fatherhood. Yudai is also opportunistic and has plans to get as much as possible out of the hospital. Not surprisingly, Ryota mistakes Yudai for an easy mark, thinking he can settle things by getting custody of both Keita and his biological son, Ryusei (Shogen Hwang). (That doesn’t play so well.)

Many of the decisions in the film seem especially boneheaded — like trading children for weekends. Then again, this is a peculiar

Carolina Cinemas (274-9500) 12 Years a Slave (R) 11:30, 2:30, 5:30, 8:30 300: Rise of an Empire 3D (R) 11:30, 2:00, 4:30, 7:00, 9:30 300: Rise of an Empire 2D (R) 10:30, 1:00, 3:30, 6:00, 8:30 American Hustle (R) 12:00, 2:45, 5:30, 8:15 Art of the Steal (R) 12:00, 2:15, 7:15 Better Living Through Chemistry (NR) 11:45, 2:15, 5:00, 7:30, 9:50 Gravity 3D (PG-13) 11:45, 2:00, 4:30, 7:00. 9:15 The Lego Movie 2D (PG) 10:15, 12:30, 2:45, 5:00, 7:15, 9:30 Like Father, Like Son (NR) 12:30, 3:15, 6:15, 9:00 The Monuments Men (PG-13) 4:30, 9:30 Mr. Peabody & Sherman 3D (PG) 10:15, 9:55 Mr. Peabody & Sherman 2D (PG) 12:45, 3:00, 5:30, 7:45

situation. It comes as no big shock that Yudai is a lot more fun as a father, but there’s much more at work here than who’s more fun.

There’s great emotional depth — a depth that quite transcends the film’s bouts of melodrama. A lot of the film is more about Ryota, the factors that make him the way he is and his discovery of his own shortcomings and humanity.

The film’s penultimate scene, with Ryota and Keita literally on different paths that finally merge, is perhaps the finest thing in the film. It also justifies everything we’ve seen. Not Rated but contains adult themes. reviewed by Ken Hanke Starts Friday at Carolina Cinemas.

®

Mr. Peabody & ShermanHHHH Director: Rob Minkoff Players: (Voices) Ty Burrell, Max Charles, Ariel Winter, Allison Janney, Stephen Colbert, Leslie Mann animated fantasy comedy Rated pg The Story: The world’s smartest dog, Mr. Peabody, must fight to keep his adopted son, Sherman.

The Lowdown: Brisk, funny and entertaining, Mr. Peabody & Sherman may not set the world on fire and certainly won’t change the way you think about animated films, but it does provide a fun 90 minutes at the movies.

It’s a risky proposition taking something that worked in 7-minute stretches more than 50 years ago and trying to spin it out into 90 minutes of contemporary movie. It certainly hasn’t worked with other attempts to mine the old Rocky and Friends show for box office gold. The fact that it mostly does work here is something of a miracle — or at least a pleasant surprise. OK, so it’s not quite on the loaves-and-fishes level of miracle, but in the winter of our moviegoing discontent, it’ll pass for one. I probably won’t run out and buy the DVD when it hits the stores in a few months, but I had a good time with Mr. Peabody & Sherman. It’s funny, clever, well-made, entertaining and even a little touching without succumbing to outright gooeyness.

The film isn’t exactly the same as the old cartoons, but I’m not sure that anyone — apart from a few critics who seem a little too attached to their childhoods — really cares all that much about its departures. I’m slightly skeptical that Mr. Peabody and Sherman were a major driving force in the popularity of the show when it was new. (Though it almost certainly had more draw than the “Aesop and Son” segments.) This take uses the same basic character designs, but is much more elaborate in its computer animation. Much of the clean simplicity of the settings has been retained, though everything looks considerably more solid — without sacrificing the naive charm. It captures the basic spirit of the show’s look, but elaborates on it without blanding it into facelessness.

The big departure from the show lies in its story. Where Peabody (Ty

Burrell) had no backstory in the show, here we learn how he was the puppy that was so smart that no one wanted him. We’re also given a rundown of his scientific accomplishments. No longer is Sherman (Max Jacobs, TV’s The Neighbors) a kind of pet and sidekick to the dog, he’s Peabody’s legally adopted son. This is where the movie gets its emotional center and its central plot — a plot that is mostly an inversion of every childhood yarn about a boy and his dog that ever assaulted your tear ducts. The mechanics of it lie in Sherman getting into a fight at school with the obnoxious Penny Peterson (Ariel Winter, Burrell’s TV daughter on Modern Family). This draws not only the ire of Penny’s parents (Stephen Colbert and Leslie Mann) but the interference of a nasty social worker, Ms. Grunion (Allison Janney), who is determined to take Sherman away from Mr. Peabody and place him in a “proper home.”

(Yes, there’s a subtext here, but it’s not really explored in any depth.)

Peabody’s plan is to make Sherman and Penny friends and win over the Petersons and Ms. Grunion. While he has no problem winning over the Petersons (chiropractic skills can be useful), Sherman can only engage Penny’s interest by doing the one thing he isn’t supposed to do — take her time-traveling in the WABAC machine. This is where the real problem begins — along with the bulk of improbable historical encounters. Most of it works, and all of it moves fast enough that it hardly matters. There’s a charming use of John Lennon’s “Beautiful Boy” on the soundtrack that sets a nice tone early on. (This isn’t entirely surprising, since director Rob Minkoff had tapped Gilbert O’Sullivan’s “Alone Again (Naturally)” for an emotional kick in his 2002 Stuart Little 2, but this is much more effective.) The expected puns are there, and they are all appropriately groan-worthy.

The jokes are silly enough to please the kids, and they work on a more savvy level for adults, which is the best approach for a family film. The big effects-driven ending? Well, it could be (and has been) used in any number of other animated movies, but it’s fine. Put it this way, you could do a lot worse — like seeing just about any other recent mainstream movie out there. Rated PG for some mild action and brief rude humor.reviewed by Ken Hanke Showing at Carolina Cinemas, Epic of Hendersonville, Regal Biltmore Grande, United Artists Beaucatcher.

Better Living Through Chemistry

ALL Sunday Shows $1

HHHH

ALL Tuesday Shows $2

Director: Geoff Moore, David Posamentier

Every Mon-Thu

Players: Sam Rockwell, Olivia Wilde, Michelle Monaghan, Ray Liotta, Ken Howard, Ben Schwartz, Jane Fonda

ALL Shows $1 After 9pm

dark comedy Rated NR The Story: A timid, henpecked pharamacist falls under the spell of a bored femme fatale.

Saturday Morning Shows ONLY $1

Sat & Sun

The Lowdown: A somewhat clever dark comedy that falls prey to predictability, but is kept afloat by Sam Rockwell’s performance.

Better Living Through Chemistry — which has nothing to do with the old Dupont slogan — is one of those indie

Brunch Menu for all shows before 12pm Movie Line 828-665-7776 Biltmore Square - 800 Brevard Rd Asheville, NC 28808

cinebarre.com

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MOVIES

by Ken Hanke & Justin Souther

films that come out of nowhere. In this case, that also seems to be true of its co-writer/co-director team. Neither Geoff Moore nor David Posamentier have any priors on their records. They seem to have appeared like genies from a bottle — yet they managed to get a not-unimpressive cast for their debut film. According to IMDb.com, Jeremy Renner was originally cast as the lead, but Renner dropped out and Sam Rockwell stepped in. Moore and Posamentier may not realize it, but that change is almost entirely what is keeping their little movie afloat. Oh, Better Living Through Chemistry is agreeable enough on its own merits — despite a screenplay that could serve as a textbook definition of predictable — but Rockwell’s presence and performance raises it to another level.

He accounts for at least one star of my review.

Sam Rockwell is one of those notquite-a-star performers who can make any movie better just by being in it, especially if he’s the lead. Rockwell has an effortless appeal (and not just because he’ll drop his trousers with very little provocation). He inexplicably manages to be geeky, cool and sexy, all at the same time. Those are exactly the qualities called for in Douglas Varney, the film’s nebbishy pharmacist who breaks free from his constraints. Douglas is brow-beaten by his controlling wife, Kara (Michelle Monaghan), gets zero respect from his son (Harrison Holzer) and is completely dismissed and belittled by his fatherin-law (Ken Howard). The only one who seems to have a clue about him is the film’s narrator (who also functions as a guest star). The film opens with yet another in a series of disappointments when he discovers that complete ownership of his father-in-law’s pharmacy does not include changing the store name from Bishop’s to Varney’s. This is exactly how his life runs.

All this is about to change. When his fairly worthless and drug-addled delivery man, Noah (TV actor Ben Schwartz), fails to make his deliveries, Douglas takes on the chore himself. This brings him into contact with a somewhat drunk, on-the-make, femme-fatale trophy wife, Elizabeth Roberts (Olivia Wilde). She’s attracted (not in the least because he’s a pharmacist). He’s terrified, but they keep seeing each other here and there until the inevitable happens. Soon he’s experiencing a life (and a relationship) he couldn’t have imagined, mixing elaborate drug cocktails for the two of them and asserting himself in unthinkable ways. Since Douglas’ wife pays no attention to him and

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Elizabeth’s husband is never home, the affair is much easier than you might think. But he hasn’t reckoned on the arrival of a pill-counting DEA agent (Norbert Leo Butz, Higher Ground), who can’t help but notice that the inventory and the prescriptions don’t add up.

In the midst of all this, Douglas bonds with his son, outgrows his wife and generally becomes his own man. There are a few plot twists that you almost certainly will see coming and a resolution that is more satisfying than surprising. The problem is that the script so carefully sets up its twists that they scarcely qualify as such. This doesn’t keep them from being agreeable, but they are too much like clockwork. What does work is Sam Rockwell and the delights of his worm-turns moments — not to mention his shrewd transition from perpetual loser to a real person by easy increments. The movie is only so-so, but he makes it something else. Not Rated but contains sex, nudity, language and copious amounts of drugs. reviewed by Ken Hanke Starts Friday at Carolina Cinemas.

300: Rise of an Empire HS Director: Director: Noam Murro (Smart People) Players: Players: Sullivan Stapleton, Eva Green, Hans Matheson, Callan Mulvey, Lena Headey ancient world action Rated R The Story: The navy of Athens attempts to thwart a sea-born invasion from the Persian Empire.

The Lowdown: A pointless excuse for a lot of unexciting bloodletting with no thematic direction and zero vision.

Zack Snyder’s original 300 (2006) was an absurdly macho sword-and-sandals epic that mixed casual homophobia, racism and blatant jingoism.

Snyder’s over-reliance on slow motion and green screen work

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was enough for the trailers to label him a “visionary,” and the film’s success was enough to keep his career afloat after multiple flops and box office disappointments.

Tangentially, it perhaps marked the low point of Internet commenting, with rabid fans taking exception to every negative review, while Rotten Tomatoes commenters questioned the great Andrew Sarris’ masculinity.

All of this was eight years ago, which, amongst other reasons (like most of the cast dying in the first movie), makes Noam Muro’s sequel, 300: Rise of an Empire, all the more puzzling. After numerous stylistically similar films and Snyder’s own diminished returns, I’m not sure 300 has aged all that well. Rise of an Empire, didn’t convince me otherwise. While the more troublesome, even amoral aspects of Snyder’s film have been removed, it’s still pretty dull, and the story is confusing. Moreover, the film is just dumb — in a genuinely tone deaf, obliviously stupid sort of way. It’s also still pretty jingoistic, yet throws a corny remix of Black Sabbath’s distinctly anti-war “War Pigs” over the end credits.

In practice, the film runs parallel to the original 300. Here we have the shirtless, beefy Athenian army — led by the patriotic Themistokles (Sullivan Stephenson, Animal Kingdom) — battling a crazed Persian general (Eva Green) and her naval invasion. The Athenians, who were denigrated as “boy-lovers” in the first movie, are butch enough here to satiate the picture’s bloodlust, though they are less buff and beefed-up than the Spartans of Snyder’s film. They also shout less.

Like its predecessor, the true purpose here is to throw together some overly directed, arty battle scenes.

There’s nothing original or unique here, and the direction reeks of hackishness. The action sequences quickly feel repetitive, consisting of too much phony, gelatinous-looking CGI blood. Any sense of fun is sucked out by the movie’s dour, selfserious tone. The only moment of levity is an unintentionally hilarious and incredibly childish sex scene, a particularly stellar bad decision in a film full of missteps. Rated R for strong sustained sequences of stylized bloody violence throughout, a sex scene, nudity and some language. reviewed by Justin Souther Showing at Carolina Cinemas, Epic of Hendersonville, Regal Biltmore Grande, United Artists Beaucatcher.

STARTING FRIDAY

The Art of The Steal

Not to be confused with the 2009 documentary of the same name, this is some kind of heistcomedy — starring Kurt Russell, Matt Dillon, Terence Stamp and Jay Baruchel — that invokes the words “one last job.” Why have you never heard of this? Well, it’s one of those movies that gets booked for a week strictly to honor a contractual commitment for theatrical play. In other words, if you want to see Kurt Russell play a character called Crunch Calhoun, don’t dawdle. (R)

Better Living Through Chemistry See review in “Cranky Hanke.”

Gloria

This Chilean film sneaked in on us at the last minute. It comes with a whopping 99 percent aproval rating on Rotten Tomatoes — 99 reviews and only one negative one. The studio write-up describes it this way: “Gloria is a ‘woman of a certain age’ but still feels young. Though lonely, she makes the best of her situation and fills her nights seeking love at social dance clubs for single adults. Her fragile happiness changes the day she meets Rodolfo. Their intense passion, to which Gloria gives her all, leaves her vacillating between hope and despair — until she uncovers a new strength and realizes that, in her golden years, she can shine brighter than ever.”

A.O. Scott in The New York Times called it, “Astute, unpretentious and thrillingly humane.” (R)

Like Father Like Son See review in “Cranky Hanke.”

Chiwetel Ejiofor, Michael Fassbender, Benedict Cumberbatch, Brad Pitt, Paul Giamatti, Lupita Nyong’o

Better Living Through ChemistryHHHH

Biographical Drama The story of Solomon Northup, a free black man kidnapped and sold into slavery. Powerful, brilliantly — and beautifully — made. It boasts a gallery of fine performances and should finally propel Chiwetel Ejiofor to the stardom he’s deserved for 10 years.

It’s a fine film, but maybe not quite a masterpiece. Rated R

Sam Rockwell, Olivia Wilde, Michelle Monaghan, Ray Liotta, Ken Howard, Ben Schwartz, Jane Fonda

300: Rise of an EmpireHS

FrozenHHHS

Sullivan Stapleton, Eva Green, Hans Matheson, Callan Mulvey, Lena Headey Ancient World Action The navy of Athens attempts to thwart a sea-born invasion from the Persian Empire. A pointless excuse for a lot of unexciting bloodletting with no thematic direction and zero vision. Rated R

3 Days to KillHH Kevin Costner, Amber Heard, Hailee Steinfeld, Connie Nielsen, Tómas Lemarquis Espionage Action A CIA agent’s dying wish to reconnect with his estranged family is derailed when he’s offered a miracle cure for his disease — but only if he kills an especially nefarious target. A disjointed, aimless and occasionally ugly action picture with zero spark. Rated PG-13

About Last NightHHHS Michael Ealy, Kevin Hart, Regina Hall, Joy Bryant, Christopher McDonald Romantic Comedy The ups and downs of two disparate couples over the course of a year. A none-too-original romantic comedy that is nevertheless likable, often amusing and refreshingly adult.

Rated R

Tyler Perry’s The Single Moms Club Here’s what we know. The publicity says, “Brought together by an incident at their children’s school, a group of single mothers from different walks of life bond and create a support group that helps them find comedy in the obstacles of life.” We know that it was written and directed by Tyler Perry, who is in it — but not in Madea drag. Otherwise, it stars Amy Smart, Terry Crews, Wendi McLendon-Covey, Nia Long and someone named King. That’s it, and Perry never screens his movies for critics, so expect little more before Friday (PG-13)

American HustleHH HHS Christian Bale, Bradley Cooper, Amy Adams, Jennifer Lawrence, Jeremy Renner Cheerfully Amoral Sometimes FactBased Comedy Drama Vaguely factbased (Abscam) comedy drama about not-very-bright people trying to out-con each other. Funny, cynical and even a little demented, David O. Russell’s latest boasts incredible turns from its highpowered cast, a genuine sense of the late 1970s and a pop soundtrack to die for.

Rated R

August: Osage CountyH HHH Meryl Streep, Julia Roberts, Chris Cooper, Ewan McGregor, Margo Martindale, Sam Shepard Theatrical Black Comedy Drama An astonishingly dysfunctional family gathers for the funeral of its patriarch. Personalities clash, tempers flare, secrets are revealed. Essentially, this is an overheated melodrama, but it’s enjoyably performed as dark comedy by a highprofile cast. It’s not a great movie, but it’s a lot of twisted fun, great dialogue

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and scenery chewing. Rated R

Dark Comedy A timid, henpecked pharamacist falls under the spell of a bored femme fatale. A somewhat clever dark comedy that falls prey to predictability, but is kept afloat

by Sam Rockwell’s performance. Rated NR

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What is this? Let’s see, “Based on the most successful racing video game franchise ever.” Oh, Lord, need we go on? OK — “Need for Speed captures the thrills of the game in a real-world setting. An game in a real-world setting. An exciting return to the great carculture films of the 1960s and ’70s, when authenticity brought a new level of intensity to the action, Need for Speed taps into what makes the American myth of the open road so enticing. The story chronicles a near-impossible cross-country race against time — one that begins as a mission for revenge, but proves to be one of redemption.” Oh, that didn’t make things any better, did it? Anyway, it stars Aaron Paul, Imogen Poots and Dominic Cooper. It’s revving its engine on Friday. (PG-13)

12 Years a SlaveHHHHS

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(Voices) Kristen Bell, Idina Menzel, Jonathan Groff, Josh Gad, Santino Fontana, Alan Tudyk Animated Fantasy A newly crowned queen — with the ability to freeze things — plunges her country into perpetual winter.

It’s certainly dazzling to look at, but apart from the presence of two female leads and no real male hero, it’s pretty standard Disney fare, decked out in a largely forgettable, but occasionally irritating, songs. Not a bad movie, but far from a great one. Rated PG

Generation WarHHHH Volker Bruch, Tom Schilling, Katharina Schüttler, Miriam Stein, Ludwig Trepte War Drama An epic look at World War II from the point of view of five young Germans. Solid, involving, somewhat clichéd and potentially controversial in its attempt to attain a degree of understanding for the “average” German point of view of WWII, Generation War falls short of greatness, but remains a compelling story. Rated NR

GravityHHHHS Sandra Bullock, George Clooney, Ed Harris (voice) Sci-Fi Suspense Two astronauts accidentally set adrift in space must find a way to survive and make it back to earth. Brilliantly made, impeccably acted, visually impressive and undeniably intense in its suspense.

Gravity is a fine film, but is maybe too efficient for its own good. Rated PG-13

3/31/14

HerHHHH Joaquin Phoenix, Amy Adams, Scarlett Johansson, Rooney Mara, Olivia Wilde, Matt Letscher Futuristic Comedy Drama Mildly futuristic story of a man who falls in love with his sentient computer operating system. It doesn’t all work, and Her is more simplistic than its ambitions to be a profound statement on modern technology would like.

But it’s more workable than its premise might sound — and there’s an emotional wallop to it. Rated R

Kill Your DarlingsHHHHS Daniel Radcliffe, Dane DeHaan, Michael C. Hall, Jack Huston, Ben Foster, David Cross, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Elizabeth Olsen Fact-Based Biographical Drama More or less the story of the young Allen Ginsberg, his first love and the origin of the Beats. It will be too candid for some, and it isn’t flawless, but Kill Your Darlings is exciting, emotionally powerful filmmaking that should be seen. Rated R

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environment and on the consum-

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the get it guide will help answer questions like: Is this a local and independent business?

Are the people who work here fairly compensated?

horror drama Rated NR Impossible to fault as filmmaking, I believe Lars

von Trier’s Antichrist is equally impossible to defend on any other level. From its charged (but meaningless) title to its final assault on viewers’ sensibilities, it is a repellent work — a nasty film that is nasty for its own sake. Ostensibly an examination of a grieving couple as they descend into mutually destructive madness, the end result is a cross between phony Ingmar Bergman and torture porn, with everything that implies.

Classic World Cinema by Courtyard Gallery will present Antichrist Friday, March 14, at 8 p.m. at Phil Mechanic Studios, 109 Roberts St., River Arts District (upstairs in the Railroad Library). Info: 273-3332, www.ashevillecourtyard.com.

Got it!

is this an environmentaly sound building choice?

WNC’s all-inclusive guide for conscientious living, the Get it! Guide integrates a directory of businesses and organizations that are invested in creating a more sustainable and resilient community, with articles on opportunities, resources, and how-tos for creating conscientious and engaged lifestyles.

Show wnc that your business gets

To reserve your space please contact:

828-251-1333 advertise@mountainx.com

it!

Synecdoche, New York HHHHH surreal comedy/drama Rated R Philip Seymour Hoffman stars in Charlie

Kaufman’s directorial debut, Synecdoche, New York (2008) represents not just one of the actor’s most accomplished performances but one of his most challenging. It is also easily the most challenging film that’s being shown shown as part of a monthlong tribute to Hoffman. It is a rich, fantasticated, heavily layered work that is apt to puzzle and even infuriate some viewers with its often nearly impenetrable story about the life, loves and losses of theatrical director, Caden Cotard (Hoffman). The Asheville Film Society will screen Synecdoche, New York Tuesday, March 18, at 8 p.m. in Theater Six at The Carolina Asheville and will be hosted by Xpress movie critics Ken Hanke and Justin Souther.

The Quiet Man HHHHS comedy romance Rated NR John Ford and John Wayne scored one of their

biggest — and perhaps best-loved — hits with this unassuming Irish comedy about a retired American boxer (Wayne) migrating to Ireland and the trouble and love he finds there. On the downside, the movie really is too long, and the attitudes about the roles of men and woman are on the archaic side. On the plus side, there’s a first-rate cast, a savvy screenplay, the most gorgeous Irish countryside imaginable and a generous heart. It’s not really a great film, but it’s an endearing one. The Hendersonville Film Society will show The Quiet Man Sunday, March 16, at 2 p.m. in the Smoky Mountain Theater at Lake Pointe Landing Retirement Community (behind Epic Cinemas), 333 Thompson St., Hendersonville.

The Curse of the Cat People HHHHS horror fantasy Rated NR Though undeniably a sequel to 1942’s Cat People,

The Curse of the Cat People (1944) is almost not a horror film. It can even be argued that its fantasy elements all take place inside the mind of its young heroine (Ann Carter), but it does have characters from the original film and addresses the events of that film. Curse, however, is a very different proposition — a kind of (maybe) delicate ghost story involving a lonely child. It is also beautiful and unique. The Thursday Horror Picture Show will screen The Curse of the Cat People Thursday, March 13 at 8 p.m. in the Cinema Lounge at The Carolina Asheville and will be hosted by Xpress movie critics Ken Hanke and Justin Souther.

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REAL ESTATE Real Estate Homes For Sale MOUNTAIN CABIN One bedroom A-frame mountain retreat.

Hwy 80 below Parkway, close to Mt. Mitchell. Easy access to creek and trout farm. Tax value $37K, asking $34K firm. Serious inquiries only. 828-337-6778.

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Commercial Property OFFICE SUITES Downtown Asheville. 1-5 office suites from 490 sqft to 3,200 sqft. Modern finishes, elevator, central air.

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Italian tile kitchen with dishwasher, gas range, refrigerator, and washer/dryer in unit. Also redone with Italian tile is the bath with a huge walk-in shower and added amenities. Central A/C and heat with water paid.

Contact Jim or Penny at 828298-6111, or email jolypri908@ earthlink.net $875/month with $25 early pay discount.

Homes For Rent ASHEVILLE EAST-DUPLEXHalf house close in. 3BR, 2BA, hardwood floors, fireplace, dishwasher, WD. Woods and trails.

No pets/smoking. $825/month, plus utilities. 828-273-6700.

SWEET FAMILY ISO RENTAL HOUSE ISO 2-3 bedroom, very pet friendly rental home within 30 miles of Swannanoa. Looking to spend $850/mo or less.

Please call Lindsay 8284249824.

Thanks!! 8284249824

Short-Term Rentals 15 MINUTES TO ASHEVILLE Guest house, vacation/short term rental in beautiful country setting. • Complete with everything including cable and internet. • $150/day (2-day minimum), $650/week, $1500/ month. Weaverville area. • No pets please. (828) 658-9145. mhcinc58@yahoo.com

Apartments For Rent BEVERLY HILLS • EAST ASHEVILLE 2BR, 1BA. Wooded views, nice. • No smoking. Lease, deposit. • Pet considered. Background check. $750/month. 2302511.

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BEVERLY HILLS Huge, top floor, 2000 sqft. 2-4BR plus den and more. Sunny. WD. Big yard.

Ideal location, close to everything. $1175/month. (828) 5053186. marci@aquamystique. com

ALL AREAS - ROOMMATES. COM. Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: http:// www.Roommates.com. (AAN CAN)

CLOSE TO UNCA! Small, peaceful complex with 2BR/1BA, WD hookup, carpet, $675/ month includes water and garbage. 1 cat ok w/fee. Year's lease, security deposit, credit and background checks and references required. Plenty of parking! For appt: Graham Investments: 253-6800.

PET FRIENDLY 2 BR 1BA 800SF APARTMENT Swannanoa. Hardwood floors, wraparound creekside deck. Private, clean, freshly re-done.WD hookups. Views of meadow and mountain. Nature all around.

Trash and yard work included. $850 828-275-0328

Condos/ Townhomes For Rent CONDO FOR RENT ON BILTMORE NEAR MISSION HOSPITAL Renovated 2/1 condo for rent in the Beverly Condos, 615 Biltmore Avenue. It's a superconvenient location, close to Mission Hospital. Renovated

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RESIDENTIAL CLEANER WANTED Locally-owned, friendly cleaning business looking for qualified residential cleaning tech. Part-time. Starts at $10 per hour. Performance bonuses.

Background check. Email interest and qualifications.(828)7130078 ev@ashevillecustomclean. com ashevillecustomclean.com TOUR GUIDE • CDL DRIVERS If you are a "people person" you could be a great Tour Guide!

Seasonal full and part-time available. Training provided. Must have a Commercial Driver's License (CDL). 828-251-8687. info@graylineasheville.com www.graylineasheville.com WAREHOUSE OPERATIONS Various positions. Asheville Distributor needs several full-time employees to join our expanding shipping and receiving department. We use support systems to process orders and computer skills are desired but not mandatory. The position does require some lifting up to a maximum of 50 lbs. We are looking for candidates that are detail-oriented, have a positive attitude, are able to keep up a fast pace and have the potential and desire to advance. • We offer competitive salary, health benefits, paid holiday, personal days and vacation time off as well as A friendly and comfortable work environment.

Please email resume and cover letter to jfox@afgdistribution. com or fax to 828-259-3674.

Skilled Labor/ Trades NEED WORKER With strong work ethic and broad range of handyman skills for estate, five miles from downtown Asheville.

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Yard work. 35 hours/month. $15/hour. Send resume: multanhixez@yahoo.com

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Employment General AFRICA • BRAZIL WORK/ STUDY! Change the lives of others while creating a sustainable future. 6, 9, 18 month programs available. Apply today! www.

OneWorldCenter.org (269) 5910518. info@OneWorldCenter. org (AAN CAN) KENNEL ASSISTANT AT THE SOAPY DOGDuties include customer service, supervising dogs, and cleaning kennels. Part & full time work available. Previous experience required. Send resume to ashevillesoapydog@ gmail.com. Call 828-350-0333.

PHONE OPERATORS From Home Must have dedicated land line and great voice. 18+ Up to $18 per hour. Flex hours/some Weekends.

1-800-403-7772 Lipservice.net (AAN CAN).

INSIDE SALES We are looking for a full time experienced inside sales employee to join our team.

Candidate will be responsible for order entry, customer service, and increasing sales revenue by anticipating customer needs and suggesting new products/ up-selling. Our business is fast paced, so the ideal candidate must be very organized and have strong phone and computer skills. We are looking for someone who is self-motivated, positive, focused, reliable and detail oriented. Previous sales experience is preferred. • Benefits include competitive pay with commission incentives, comfortable atmosphere w/ casual dress, holiday and vacation pay, and great office hours.

Interested parties please fax or email resume and cover letter, Attn: Jacqui fax# 828-236-2658 or email: Jacqui@afgdistribution.com

JOBS Restaurant/ Food APOLLO FLAME • WAITSTAFF Full-time. Fast, friendly atmosphere. • Experience required.

Apply in person between 2pm4pm, 485 Hendersonville Road.

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Human Services 2 IMMEDIATE OPENINGS Parkway of Family Preservation Services has 2 immediate fulltime openings for Associate or fully licensed Clinicians. The openings are in our Hendersonville and Asheville Offices.

Duties would involve working with dually (MH/SA) diagnosed adults providing assessments, individual and group therapy (some evening groups may be required). Good Candidates would be familiar with State funding paperwork, Seeking Safety EBP and have adult experience. FPS has an excellent benefit package and salary commensurate with experience.

Please send resumes to: slayton@fpscorp.com

AVAILABLE POSITIONS • MERIDIAN BEHAVIORAL HEALTH Peer Support Specialists: Multiple positions open for Peer Support Specialist working within a number of recovery oriented programs within our agency. Being a Peer Support Specialist provides an opportunity for individuals to transform their own personal lived experience with mental health and/or addiction challenges into a tool for inspiring hope for recovery in others. Applicants must demonstrate maturity in their own recovery process, have a valid driver’s license, reliable transportation and have moderate computer skills. For further information, contact hr.department@ meridianbhs.org. Staff Psychiatrist Meridian Behavioral Health Services is a non-profit provider of community mental health services serving nine counties in Western North Carolina. We have an opening for a Psychiatrist providing outpatient care for adults. Our primary office locations are in Waynesville, Sylva, Franklin and Brevard. We are seeking physicians who have interest and experience in community mental health care treatment of persistent mental illness and addiction. Part of this time could involve providing treatment for opioid addiction in our clinic-based buprenorphine (Suboxone) program. Minimal call responsibilities. Our locations have qualified for education loan repayment programs.

Send CV to: Matthew Holmes, MD email: matt.holmes@meridianbhs.org or Joe Ferrara, CEO joe.ferrara@meridianbhs.org Jackson County Qualified Mental Health Professional (QMHP) Assertive Community Treatment

Team (ACTT) Must have mental health degree and two years’ experience. For more information contact Becky McKnight, rebekah.mcknight@meridianbhs.org • For further information and to complete an application, visit our website: www.meridianbhs.org/open-positions.html DIRECT CARE WORKER Need experienced worker to provide care for adult female with autism and IDD. Call (828) 2729759 or jhall81088@msn.com FamilyTree Alternative Family Services.

DIRECT SUPPORT PROFESSIONALS Progressive company seeking dependable individuals to provide residential support to individuals with disabilities.

Must be able to work a flexible schedule, be a positive role model and have a clean driving background. Interested individuals can send an email admin@ mountainarearesidentialfacilities. org or apply in person Monday and Wednesday from 10am2pm at 108 Cedar Ridge Drive, Asheville, NC, 28803.

EVENING, WEEKEND, AND OVERNIGHT POSITIONS Must be willing to attend Company trainings and offer personal care.

We are seeking professional and dependable in-home CareGivers for our WNC team. www. homeinstead.com/159 MEDICAL COORDINATOR Red Oak Recovery, a young adult Substance Abuse Treatment Program is seeking a qualified, motivated and compassionate individual to fulfill the role of medical coordinator. The medical coordinator is responsible for managing all aspects of client medical care. Applicants should possess great communication skills, organizational skills, be self-directed and work well on a team. Previous experience with prescription medication management in a substance abuse or mental health setting is preferred. EMT or higher medical qualification is required. We offer competitive pay and health benefits. Please submit resumes to jobs@redoakrecovery.com MENTAL HEALTH POSITIONS AVAILABLE IN HAYWOOD, JACKSON, & MACON COUNTIES Looking to fill several positions between now and Aug/ Sept. Licensed/provisional therapists to provide Outpatient, Day Treatment or Intensive In-home services to children/adolescents with mental health diagnoses.

Therapists must have current

NC therapist license. Also looking for QP/Qualified professionals to provide Intensive In-home or Day Treatment services. QP's must have Bachelor's degree and 2-4 years of experience post-degree with this population (experience required depends on type of degree). Apply by submitting resume to telliot@ jcpsmail.org MENTAL HEALTH THERAPIST For Intensive Family Counseling, Aspire Youth and Family, Inc. Clyde, NC. Full-Time Intensive In-home Mental Health Therapist/Team Leader, Aspire Youth and Family, Inc. Clyde, NC Masters Level Clinician (LCSW, LPC, LMFT, LPA, or Associate Licensure: LCSWA, LPCA, LMFTA) Be a part of a three-person clinical team working with children, adolescents, and their families (family therapy, behavioral skill building, case management, client/ family advocacy etc...). Minimum Qualifications: Masters degree in a human service field, licensure in the State of North Carolina, and (1) year experience working with youth and families. Visit our Web page to learn more about our company: www.aspireyouthandfamily.com SUBSTANCE ABUSE RECOVERY GUIDE Four Circles Recovery Center, a young adult wilderness therapy program is seeking highly motivated, energetic, compassionate individuals for direct care positions. Direct Care Recovery Guides work on a rotating week on/week off schedule. Treatment takes place in both wilderness and residential settings. Personal or professional experience with the 12-Steps, Substance Abuse Treatment, and Wilderness Therapy are preferred. • We offer competitive pay, health benefits, professional substance abuse and clinical training. Substance abuse and clinical supervision are available. Please submit resumes to guidejobs@fourcirclesrecovery.com SUBSTANCE ABUSE RECOVERY GUIDE Substance Abuse Recovery Guide Red Oak Recovery, a young adult Substance Abuse Treatment Program is seeking highly qualified individuals for direct care positions. Recovery Guides work on a rotating 4 day on/3 day off schedule. Treatment takes place in a residential setting with wilderness adventure expeditions.

WFR, CSAC, or a degree in a human services field preferred.

Personal or professional experience with 12 Step Recovery, Substance Abuse Treatment, Mental Health Treatment and/or Wilderness Therapy is required.

THERAPEUTIC FOSTER PARENTS NEEDED If you are interested in making a difference in the life of a child, and live in the Asheville area, please give me a call. Free training. Call Debbie Smiley (828) 258-0031 ext. 348 or debbie.smiley@thementornetwork.com THRIVE SEEKING QUALIFIED MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL Psychosocial Rehabilitation Program currently looking for a dynamic individual, passionate about recovery and encourages wellness through mentoring. FT position for a Qualified Professional. The QP must have a valid driver’s license and a clean driving record for past 5 years. Bachelor’s level education in mental health/human service field preferred. www.thrive4health.org

Professional/ Management FT MANAGER AT THE SOAPY DOG Previous Kennel & Managing experience required.

Duties include customer service, supervising dogs, and managing staff. Send resume to ashevillesoapydog@gmail.com.

Questions call 828-350-0333 STUDIO PRODUCTION COORDINATOR Jewelry design studio is looking for an individual who is detail oriented and possesses the following skills: • Ability to handle production details of multiple jobs, coordinating and scheduling daily/weekly orders, managing the ordering of raw materials from multiple vendors, receiving orders, handling returns, invoicing accounts, quality control, entering inventory into POS system, good communication skills. • Working knowledge of Excel and Word.

• Jewelry experience a plus.

Please email resume to: pauladawkins@jewelsthatdance. com VICE PRESIDENT OF CONSTRUCTION RECRUITING Mountain Management Group is seeking to fill the role of Regional Vice President of Construction Recruiting. We offer a generous compensation plan and commission starting at 50% with growth potential. Must have construction recruiting experience.If you are hard-working, self motivated and an individual who enjoys helping others, we’d like to hear from you! Visit us at mtnmg.com & email resume to info.mmg@ mtnmg.com

Teaching/ Education TEACHING POSITIONS Are you interested in making a difference? Asheville Academy for Girls is currently seeking applicants for these positions: Fulltime Physics and/or Chemistry Teacher/Tutor; or Part-time Special Education Teacher.

The suitable applicant is someone who has licensure and is a responsible and positive role model. Asheville Academy for Girls is a private therapeutic boarding school for girls ages 10-14. Our beautiful 24-acre

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Benefits are offered to full time employees and include health, dental, vision and life insurance as well as holiday pay, vacation and sick leave. EOE. Please send a resume and cover letter to humanresources@ashevilleacademy.com No phone calls or walk-ins please. www.ashevilleacademy.com

Caregivers/ Nanny CHILDCARE/TEACHER Must have NC Childcare Credentials or be presently enrolled and have at least one year experience in childcare. Call 254-4411 or peggy.parham@bcsemail. org

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Arts/Media GRAPHIC DESIGN Local wholesale company is looking for a full-time entry level product photographer with graphic design skills. A strong eye for design, detail and knowing Adobe Photoshop / indesign / illustrator is an absolute must. Employee will be responsible for providing professional product photography, image management of over 8,000 items, and weekly promotional emails (layout and design).

Must have the ability to keep up in a fast paced work environment under weekly deadlines.

Experience is preferred, but candidates who can demonstrate the required skill areas will be considered. We offer a competitive salary, health benefits, paid holiday and vacation time as well as friendly and comfortable work environment. Please email resume and portfolio/link to matthewb@afgdistribution. com

Career Training AIRLINE CAREERS begin here – Get trained as FAA certified Aviation Technician. Housing and Financial aid for qualified students. Job placement assistance. Call Aviation Institute of Maintenance 877-492-3059.

(AAN CAN)

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

61

by Rob Brezny

FREEWILL ASTROLOGY ARIES (March 21-April 19)

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

"There was another life that I might have had, but I am having this one." So says a character in Kazuo Ishiguro's novel The Unconsoled. At this juncture in your life story, Aries, it might be healing for you to make a similar declaration. Now is an excellent moment to say a final goodbye to plot twists that you wished would have happened but never did. To do so will free up stuck energy that will then become available for future projects. You might even awaken to exciting possibilities you haven't yet imagined.

Do you remember being in your mother’s womb? Probably not. But here’s what I know about that time: In the first few weeks after you were conceived, your body grew at a very rapid rate. Once you were born, if you had continued to expand and develop with that much vigor, you would literally be as big as a mountain by now. So let’s be thankful that you slowed down. But I do want to sound an alert: You are currently in a growth spurt with some metaphorical resemblances to that original eruption.

It’s basically a good thing. Just be aware that you may experience growing pains.

You won't be the recipient of good luck in the coming days. Nor will you experience bad luck or dumb luck or weird luck. No, Scorpio. The serendipitous slew of synchronicities that will slip and slide into your sphere requires a new word, which I have coined for this occasion: "shluck." Shluck is a cracked yet plucky sort of backward luck that provides you with an abundance of curious slack. Shluck slings your way a series of happy accidents and curious coincidences that give you experiences you didn't even realize you needed. To take maximum advantage of shluck's benefits, you have to dispense with your agendas and drop your expectations.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) In May 2011, two Nepalese men reached the top of Mount Everest after a six-week climb. Lakpa Tsheri Sherpa and Sano Babu Sunuwar had prepared an unprecedented way to get back down off the mountain.

Strapping themselves to a single parachute, they leaped off and paraglided for 45 minutes, landing near a Sherpa village thousands of feet below the summit. I suggest you look around for a metaphorical version of a shortcut like that, Taurus. Don't do the next part of the journey the same way you did the previous phase. Take a more direct route.

Enjoy an alternate adventure. Give yourself a fresh challenge.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20) Seeking wisdom and chasing after pleasure are polar opposites, right? You must devote yourself to either one or the other, correct?

You can be an enlightened servant of the greater good or else an exuberant hedonist in quest of joy, but not both. True? No. No. No. False. Wrong. Here's the bigger truth: Now and then, grace periods come along when you can become smarter and kinder by exploring the mysteries of feeling really good. Can you guess when the next of those grace periods will arrive for you, Gemini? It's here now!

CANCER (June 21-July 22) Humans walked on the moon before anyone ever had the simple idea of putting wheels on suitcases. Unbelievable, right? Until 1972, three years after astronauts first trod the lunar surface, travelers in airports and train stations had to carry or drag wheelless boxes full of their belongings. I suspect that a comparable out-of-sequence thing may be going on in your own life, Cancerian. In some ways you are totally up-to-date, and in others you’re lagging behind. Now would be a good time to identify any discrepancies and start correcting them. Metaphorically speaking, I'd love you to have rolling luggage by the next time you take a journey.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) Have you ever heard of the Sasquatch, also known as Bigfoot? You know, one of those big, hairy, humanoid beasts that walks upright

62

Computer/ Technical

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

and lives in dense forests? Scientists assure us that there’s no such thing, but then, they used to say the same thing about the platypus. It was a myth, they declared; a figment of explorers' vivid imaginations. A duckbilled, egg-laying mammal simply could not exist. When the respected British zoologist George Shaw claimed that there was indeed such a creature, he was mocked by his contemporaries. Eventually, though, the truth emerged, and Shaw was vindicated. I suspect that you Leos will soon experience an event akin to the discovery and confirmation that the platypus is real.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) Kyoka is a Japanese word that means a flower reflected in a mirror. I suggest you use it as a metaphor to help you understand what's happening in your life right now. Here are some clues to jump-start your ruminations. Are you more focused on the image of what you love than on what you love? If so, is there anything wrong with that, or is it perfectly fine? Are you more interested in ephemeral beauty that you can admire from afar than in tangible beauty you can actually touch? If so, is there anything wrong with that, or is it perfectly fine? Should you turn away from a dreamy surrogate and turn toward the real thing? If so, why?

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) A British researcher poured 300 million facts into a computer program designed to determine the most boring day in history. The winner was April 11, 1954. It was selected because almost nothing important happened except an election in Belgium. I'm wondering whether you Libras might reach that level of blah sometime soon. The astrological omens suggest it's a possibility. And frankly, I hope that's exactly what happens. You need a break from high adventure and agitated activity.

You would benefit from indulging in some downtime that allowed you to luxuriate in silence and stasis. The time has come to recharge your psychic batteries.

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COMPUTER TECHNICIAN (SC) needed in Asheville/Hendersonville area. A+/MCS/ Windows Server Knowledge preferred (not required). Reliable transportation & Business casual appearance. Please submit Resume’ w/3 References to: Info@ETSNetworksInc.com

Retail EXPERIENCED SALESPERSON Part-time. Must work Saturdays. Send resume: marlene@jewelsthatdance.com

LICENSED NAIL TECHNICIAN For Sensibilities Day Spa. Must have a minimum of 1 year experience and the ability to work at both locations. Please bring resume to 59 Haywood Street.

Xchange

In the old fairy tale "Ali Baba and the 40 Thieves," a poor woodcutter is collecting firewood in the forest when he spies a gang of thieves bragging about their exploits.

Observing them from a hiding place, he hears them chant the phrase "Open, sesame." This magically unseals the opening to a cave that’s full of their stolen treasure.

When the thieves have left, Ali Baba goes to the cave and says "Open, sesame" himself.

The hocus-pocus works: He slips into the cave and steals a bag of gold. This story resembles an adventure you could enjoy sometime soon, Sagittarius. I suspect you may discover your own version of "Open, sesame" that will give you access to a less literal, more legitimate bounty.

General Merchandise

Your ability to heal rifts and bridge gaps is unusually high right now. You could connect seemingly irreconcilable elements and forge apparently impossible links.

Former allies who have become estranged might be moved to bond again through your compassionate intervention. I'm not promising miraculous feats of unification, but I'm not ruling them out, either. You have a sixth sense about how to create interesting mixtures by applying just the right amount of pressure and offering just the right kind of tenderness.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) My friend Harry said he wanted to teach me to play golf. "Are you kidding?" I asked him incredulously. "The dullest game on the planet?" He tried to convince me that it would provide lots of interesting metaphors I could use in writing horoscopes. "Name one," I challenged him.

"Volkswagen," he said, is a slang term that describes what happens when a golfer makes an awkward shot that nevertheless turns out to be quite good. "Hmmm," I replied. "That is exactly the theme I’ve decided on for the Aquarius horoscope."

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SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

Handy Man

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Yard Sales THIS SATURDAY March 15.

Bent Creek Baptist Church, Brevard Road, past Discount Shoes before Parkway. 7am-1pm. Rain or shine. Fundraiser to benefit Bent Creek Community Park.

Be there!

Services Financial PROBLEMS with the IRS or State Taxes? Settle for a fraction of what you owe! Free face to face consultations with offices in your area. Call 888608-3016

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HOW SAFE IS YOUR WATER? "The Water Guy" can help you find out, with a FREE in-home water test. WNC factory authorized dealer, for Hague Water International, American owned and made for over 50 years. • Patented and guaranteed. Call Stephen Houpis, 828-280-2254.

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Legal Notices NORTH CAROLINA BUNCOMBE COUNTY IN THE GENERAL COURT OF JUSTICE DISTRICT COURT DIVISION BEFORE THE CLERK 14 SP 135 IN RE DOE FOR THE ADOPTION OF: BABY BOY DOE NOTICE OF PENDENCY OF PROCEEDING TO: the unknown father of Baby Boy Doe TAKE NOTICE THAT a Petition for Adoption of a minor male child named BABY BOY DOE born to LAUREN DIANE HARRIS on about the 14th day of February, 2014 in Asheville, Buncombe County, North Carolina, was filed in the office of the Clerk of Superior Court of Buncombe County, State of North Carolina on the 19th day of February, 2014. You have been identified as the father of this child, you must file a response to the petition within thirty (30) days after this notice is first served upon you in order to participate in and receive further notice of the proceeding, including notice of the time and place of hearing. THE CLERK OF SUPERIOR COURT WILL ENTER AN ORDER ALLOWING THE ADOPTION TO PROCEED WITHOUT YOUR CONSENT IF THERE IS NO RESPONSE. Any and all rights

you may have with respect to the minor will be extinguished and all aspects of any legal relationship between the minor and you as parent will be terminated with the entry of a Decree of Adoption. This the 26th day of February, 2014. /s/ Christopher M. Craig Craig Associates, PC Attorney for Petitioners NC State Bar No. 27770 149 S. Lexington Avenue Asheville, NC 28801 Phone (828) 258-2888.

NOTICE OF UNCLAIMED PROPERTY The following is a list of unclaimed and confiscated property at the Asheville Police Department: electronic equipment; cameras; clothing; lawn and garden equipment; personal items; tools; weapons (including firearms); jewelry; automotive items; building supplies; bikes and other miscellaneous items. Anyone with a legitimate claim or interest in this property has 30 days from the date of this publication to make a claim. Unclaimed items will be disposed of according to statutory law. For further information, or to file a claim, contact the Asheville Police Department Property and Evidence Section, 828-232-4576. NOTICE OF DISPOSITION The following is a list of unclaimed and confiscated property at the Asheville Police Department tagged for disposition: audio and video equipment; cameras; clothing; lawn and garden equipment; personal items; tools; weapons (including firearms); jewelry; automotive items; building supplies; bikes and other miscellaneous. Items will be disposed of 30 days from date of this posting.

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Classes & Workshops CLAY CLASSES AT ODYSSEY CLAYWORKS “Spring clay classes begin March 24th.

Sgraffito And The Thrown Form, Hand Built Pottery For Daily Use, Beginner Wheel, Creative Containers For Flowers, The Art Of Etsy, Pots That Pour, Intermediate Wheel Throwing, Clay Animals For Kids. Visit www.odysseyceramicarts.com for details about our upcoming classes and workshops, or call 828-2850210.”

Bodywork

6 Hissy fit 10 Urban housing option 14 Dazzling success 15 Practice

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Pet Services POOPER SCOOPER SERVICE We clean up after your dog so you don't have to. Western NC's premier Pet Waste Removal Service. DogLogServices.com 1 (855) 4-DogLog.

Automotive

CASH FOR CARS: Any Car/ Truck. Running or Not! Top Dollar Paid. We Come To You! Call For Instant Offer: 1-888-4203808 www.cash4car.com (AAN CAN)

WE'LL FIX IT AUTOMOTIVE • Honda and Acura repair. Half price repair and service. ASE and factory certified. Located in the Weaverville area, off exit 15. Please call (828) 275-6063 for appointment. www.wellfixitautomotive.com

Adult Adult DREAMS Your destination for relaxation. Now available 7 days a week! • 9am-11pm. Call (828) 275-4443.

67 Knife of old

17

41 Mixed bag

68 Quality that produces taste

20

42 “As I was saying …”

43 “Slung” stuff 44 Suffix with lion 46 Puts up 50 *Fearsome shark

21 Oom-___ (tuba sounds)

54 Bit of harmless mischief

22 Falling-out result

55 Official proceedings

23 Good economic news 25 *“Good night, John-Boy” series 31 PC key below Home

Lost Pets

66 Specifications marked on 10-hole harmonicas

17 *Any foreseeable difficulty 20 Sitcom character from Melmac

33 Lacrosse goalie’s area 36 Do some legpulling

56 Like a couch potato 58 Night on which “60 Minutes” originally aired: Abbr.

59 *“Why am I not surprised?”

32 Pay a call to

No. 0205 Edited by Will Shortz

63 Botanical wings 64 Gear-cutting tools 65 Yak, yak, yak

ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE

HAnswer O D S toB Previous A S K JPuzzle O J O A N O N I L I E S S A L A F E D U P J OP DE OG I EJ MK IR TO W IL L I ON SG E BO OA SS OT M RJ OP BM EO R VG IA TN A EM AHHY AP LO O U L Y SZ SO EE SS S GS RE A CN T L A N ME EX AJ TE YT EL SA QH TO I N E A R B S NE EA AT KS I NU N EP N I VN Y PR RA SF T E LC GR I O NC B I A Y A L GO ER E HL OY HL OE SH IA NN AK I E RC A EB RO S A D AE MN SJ AO NY D L E R A BY RE AN M SP IO DT E AJ O S S AM LO AND A EI NN OC A BP IS T J M B V A E R I RL I S E N E WH OR OU D RJ OC WDW I I T L HS EO RN S DE EL BE IC T E AA TT E I RT MOOMP I E T E N O L A C T I I A L E E B R O Z I S I S P O S E W A X Y S K O R T R A Z R

1

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1 Fixes up, as a fixer-upper

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41

5 Muscle car roof option

43

6 “Quiet, please!”

50

24

9

25

26 31 34

35

38

39

44

45 52

55

35 One in an upper chamber: Abbr.

49

54 57

61

58 62

63

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PUZZLE BY TRACY GRAY

41 Online “Yikes!”

34 Add ___ of salt

47

53

56

60

19 Like some Uno cards

30 Tick off

48

40

46

51

40 Vert.’s opposite

28 Part of a gig

28

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18 Squealed (on)

27 Leaves home?

27

36

11 On a cruise

26 Needing hoeing, say

13

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37 Ethnic joke, often 47 Catch a few Z’s 38 Secluded spot 48 Following, as one’s beliefs 39 Huff and puff

24 Certain econ class

12

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36 Crown inset

13 Unit pricing word

11

19

10 Make by hand 12 Knighthood letters

10 16

30

7 It may elicit a 6-Down 59

8

21

37

4 Mule of song

7

18

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3 Totally in favor of

9 “Reading Lolita in ___” (2003 best seller)

5

15

29

2 Spotted wildcat

8 Multinational bank that sponsored the New York City Marathon

4

14

23

DOWN

No. 0205

edited by Will Shortz

37 Breakfast cereal … or a hint to what’s found in the answers to the four starred clues?

16 Con artist’s mark

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Automotive Services

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1 Celebrity ribbing

29 ___ of Gibraltar

Autos for Sale

Mind, Body, Spirit

ACROSS

Musical Services

Pets Classes & Workshops

Crossword

The New York Times Crossword puzzle

44 James who was portrayed by Beyoncé

45 Mowers’ paths

49 Shish kebab need

53 Café au lait holder 57 Puppy sounds 59 Cinch ___ (trash bag brand) 60 World Cup chant

51 Analgesics’ targets

61 Long, long time

52 “Well, ___!”

62 Mexican Mrs.

For answers, call 1-900-285-5656, $1.49 a minute; or, with a credit card, 1-800-814-5554.

For answers: Call 1-900-285-5656, Online subscriptions: Today’s puzzle Annual subscriptions area available themore bestthan of Sunday 2,000 past puzzles, $1.49 a minute; or, with credit card, forand nytimes.com/crosswords ($39.95 a 1-800-814-5554. crosswords from the last 50 years: 1-888-7-ACROSS. year).

AT&TAnnual users: Text NYTX 386 to subscriptions are to available for download puzzles, or visit Share tips: nytimes.com/wordplay. the best of Sunday crosswords the information. nytimes.com/mobilexword forfrom more last 50 years: 1-888-7-ACROSS. Online subscriptions: Today’s puzzle Crosswords and more than for 2,000 young past solvers: nytimes.com/learning/xwords.

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• Black Mountain

MARCH 12 - MARCH 18, 2014

63