September 2014
the
bis aby sue
Colic What we know (and don’t) and how to survive Page 29
Baby wisdom
Parents share the advice they wish they’d gotten Page 36
Prepare your child for a sibling Save a bundle on baby
Page 24
Page 43
Juliet Dahlen, 6 days old, Bloomington
CONTENTS Features
29 UNDERSTANDING COLIC Coping with the crying isn’t easy. But you can do it! Here’s how. By Jen Wittes
36 WISDOM FOR PARENTS Moms share what they wished they’d known before they became parents.
43
48
BIG BRO, BIG SIS
BAKER’S JOY
Helping your firstborn adjust to life with a new baby in the house starts well before the birth. By Corey Butler
See how a Brooklyn Park mom makes a little creativity go a long way when it comes to making cakes. By Sarah Dorison
ABOUT OUR COVER KID Name: Juliet Age: 6 days City: Bloomington Parents: Kyle and Carolyn Dahlen Siblings: James 5, William, 3 At birth: 6 pounds, 13 ounces, 20 inches long Personality so far: Easy going — and fascinated by her two big brothers. PHOTOS BY BROOKE JAKUBOV PHOTOGRAPHY IMAGESBYBROOKE.COM
6 September 2014 • mnparent.com
Minnesota Parent September 2014
Departments 10 CHATTER 12 BABY ON BOARD You won’t believe the high cost of birthing — and taking leave, too. 14 TODDLER TIME Yes, it’s time to think about preschool. What’s right for you? 16 ASK THE PEDIATRICIAN How can you reduce spit-up incidents with young babies?
18 IN THE KITCHEN Reinvent the common s’more with these sublime recipe twists. 20 TEENS & TWEENS What to expect from coaches, kids and parents in organized sports.
22 HOT STUFF Get inspired to make baby food with four easy (and quiet) gadgets. 24 GROWS ON TREES Learn now spend strategically on Baby — and not get suckered. 26 BOOK SHELF Minnesota Parent staff share their picks for infant reading time. 66 FROM OUR READERS Fans share how they — finally! — got their babies to sleep.
Out&About PAGE 54
mnparent.com • September 2014 7
From the editor
happy babies. happy moms.
Oh, baby!
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t’s here, our annual Baby Issue, highlighting that first stage of parenting — with all its mind-blowing joys, mystifying, frustrating challenges and personal growth you never thought possible! How could you love something this much? And — oh, yeah — why is it so hard? (Remember when you used to compare your dog to your friends’ kid? Ha!) Is it how you thought it would be? For me, it wasn’t. Yes, the lack of sleep was hard. But our baby wasn’t mellow, sitting back, contently, during long stretches like my friends’ kids did. And I was no Madonna, perfectly nursing her peaceful child. I was restless. I couldn’t believe how much time I needed to spend sitting still for nursing! Though our son had many moments of being delightful in his first few months (his first smiles were pure charm, his alertness was impressive), he cried a lot and was eventually “diagnosed” by the pediatrician as having colic. In this issue, you’ll get the full story on this mysterious affliction. You’ll also hear advice for new parents, brought to you by Minnesota moms who’ve been through it all. What they’ve discovered with hindsight is valuable: You can do this, Mom and Dad. You’re smarter and stronger than you think you are! Are you planning or expecting a second child? In this issue, you’ll also find tips for helping your first born grow into that big brother or big sister role. This month we’re bringing another mama writer into the fold — Dr. Kimara Gustafson, a Maplewood pediatrician with a young child of her own. In Ask the Pediatrician, she tackles the issue of ceaseless infant spit-up, plus over-eager toddler eaters. (Don’t worry: Dr. Peter Dehnel will continue to write for us as well!) Though I wasn’t a huge fan of the baby stage — and went crazy with disbelief every time someone said: “Cherish every second. It goes so fast!” — I can now see more clearly (as a mother of a 6-year-old) what those people were trying to say: Whether you have just one child (like me) or 16, each one will go through each stage only once, for better or for worse. So live in the moments of babyhood (try to focus on the bright spots). Be as present as you can. Hold that baby. Rock her. Baby him. Because when it’s gone, it really is gone.
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Sarah Dorison, Editor
Vol. 29 • Issue 9
Co-Publishers Janis Hall jhall@mnparent.com Terry Gahan tgahan@mnparent.com General Manager Chris Damlo 612-436-4376 cdamlo@mnparent.com Editor Sarah Dorison 612-436-4385 sdorison@mnparent.com Contributing Writers/Photographers Eric Braun Corey Butler Zoe Gahan Kimara Gustafson Shannon Keough Kelly Jo McDonnell Valerie Moe Jen Wittes Jennifer Wizbowski Creative Director Dana Croatt dcroatt@mnparent.com Senior Graphic Designer Valerie Moe Graphic Designer Amanda Wadeson
Are you currently pregnant or had a baby during the previous month and interested in participating in a telephone-based health and wellness program? The University of Minnesota is seeking women who are currently pregnant or less than 6 weeks postpartum to participate in a research study examining the effect of exercise and wellness on mood following childbirth • Participants receive a motivational exercise program or a health and wellness program, which begins after the birth of your baby (participants can sign up for the program during pregnancy) • Program delivered to you via the mail and phone • Must be 18 years of age or older; must not currently exercise regularly • Must not take antidepressants • Must have a history of depression • You will receive $100 for your time
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Sales Administrator Kate Manson 612-436-5085 kmanson@mnparent.com Circulation Marlo Johnson 612-436-4388 distribution@mnparent.com Advertising 612-825-9205 sales@mnparent.com 60,000 copies of Minnesota Parent are printed monthly, available at news stands statewide. Get Minnesota Parent mailed to your home for just $12 a year. Call 612-825-9205 for more information. Minnesota Parent (ISSN 0740 3437) is published monthly by Minnesota Premier Publications. POSTMASTER send address changes to: MINNESOTA PARENT, 1115 Hennepin Ave. Minneapolis, MN 55403. Minnesota Parent is copyright 2014 by Minnesota Premier Publications. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or part without written permission is prohibited. Address all material to address above.
mnparent.com • September 2014 9
PIZZA FARM PARTY PANACHE Party planning and decorating isn’t easy for busy parents, especially with picture-perfect parties plastered all over Pinterest (collectively raising standards for everyone). That’s why two Wisconsin-born sisters, Kim Carlson and Lindsay Dorcas, founded Yellow Pinwheels, a Minneapolisbased online party store. Packages — with themes like travel, carnival, tea party, nautical and French — include decorations, plates, napkins, cutlery, straws, decorative washi tape and more, all with an emphasis on looking creative and playful, not “matchy-matchy.” “We give you the tools and you can be as creative as you want,” Dorcas said. Packages start at $54.99. See yellowpinwheels.com.
It’s September. And that means our chances for perfectly warm, sunny Minnesota weather are shrinking by the second. Take action! Go to a pizza farm with the kids — Red Barn Farm in Northfield. Bring everything you need for a family picnic, including a blanket or chairs and a table, plus plates, cups, cutlery, side dishes, appetizers and drinks. (Yes, beer and wine are OK.) Then explore the farm, including animals, gardens and just plain beautiful rural scenery, including the farm’s namesake old red barn. Pizza-ordering hours are 4:30–8:30 p.m. all Wednesdays through October and 11:30 a.m.–3:30 p.m. Sept. 21 and Oct. 19. Pizzas are topped with pesticide-free veggies from the gardens. No reservations are needed. Just show up with cash or a check. Learn more at redbarnfarmofnorthfield.com.
TEEN MONEY MANUAL Minnesota Parent’s own former financial columnist Kara McGuire has a new book out! The Teen Money Manual: A Guide to Cash, Credit, Spending, Saving, Work, Wealth and More ($9.95, paperback) includes “just about anything teens would want to know about money and finance but didn’t know enough to ask,” according to Kirkus Reviews. That’s right, parents. This book isn’t for you. It’s for your budding teen or tween financial whiz (age 10 to 17) and it’s not a stuffy, gray read: It’s visually engaging with splashy colors, lively illustrations and dramatic typography on nearly every page, making it not just attractive, but also engaging and easy to dip in and out of at a moment’s notice. Highlights include learning how to land that first job, figuring out your paycheck and negotiating a raise. McGuire lives in St. Paul with her husband, daughter and two sons. Learn more at capstonepub.com.
10 September 2014 • mnparent.com
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Shannon
Keough
Money changes everything
T
here’s a picture of me in the early days with my daughter Lydia, clutching my baby and a checkbook with a supremely irritated look on my face. One of the things I remember most from the postpartum period — aside from the endless wails of my colicky baby and the sensation that my insides were constantly about to burst forth from my C-section incision — was the feeling of persistent financial-related stress. “What should be a joyous occasion for families frequently becomes a trigger for falling into poverty,” said Ellen Bravo, executive director at Family Values at Work, a national network of coalitions that advocates for family-friendly workplaces, speaking of the baby-related financial challenges that plague families in the U.S.
Giving birth (to a credit card balance) Let’s talk about the expense of giving birth. According to an article in the New York Times from June last year, charges for delivery in the U.S. have tripled since 1996, coming in at approximately $30,000 for vaginal delivery and $50,000 for a C-section. Women with insurance pay an average of $3,400 out of pocket. Even the average seems a little low to me. What about the parents who have inadequate insurance or who encounter unforeseen complications and expenses? “In all my research and planning for starting a family, it never occurred to me what a catastrophic pregnancy could do
12 September 2014 • mnparent.com
to our finances,” said Rachel, a mother of one who lives in Northeast Minneapolis. Rachel developed complications in her pregnancy and gave birth to her daughter at 25 weeks gestation. Her daughter spent close to five months in the NICU. “My hospitalization and emergency C-section ran nearly $70,000, and my daughter’s first year of medical expenses topped out at over $1.2 million,” Rachel said. Luckily, her insurance plan covered enough of these expenses so that her family didn’t have to sell their house or declare bankruptcy, but she shudders to think of what could’ve been if her family had chosen a less-comprehensive health plan. (By the way, her daughter’s doing great now.)
Maternity leave? For many women, maternity leave is a concept, not a reality. And no wonder: Although new parents have the right to take up to 12 weeks of unpaid leave under the Family and Medical Leave Act, the law applies only to employees who have worked at least 12 months at a company with at least 50 employees. In other words, many women don’t meet the criteria — and many of the ones who do can’t afford to take time off without pay. It’s difficult to look at the facts and conclude that
the United States’ approach to maternity (not to mention paternity) leave is anything but abysmal. According to a survey released earlier this year by the United Nations’ labor agency, ILO, all but three countries (for which they had data) provide cash benefits to women during maternity leave. The exceptions to the rule? Oman, Papua New Guinea and the United States.
It’s difficult to look at the facts and conclude that the United States’ approach to maternity leave is anything but abysmal. What you can do If you have the energy and inspiration to rise up and take action, please do! If you organize it, I’ll join you. However, if you just need practical suggestions for addressing the financial implications of parenthood, here are a couple: Negotiate with your insurance company or individual billers. I’m currently paying off the delivery, the fancy breast pump people and an emergency room bill for my daughter in monthly, interest-free installments. Ask for what you want. If you want to
work from home the last week before your due date, ask if you can. If you want to spend more time with your baby and possibly reduce childcare expenses, ask about a compressed work week or a job share. At heart I’m an extremely non-confrontational person, but so far I’ve found parenting to be like one long course in assertiveness training. When it comes time to have a baby, take advantage of the opportunity to stand up for yourself — whether it’s negotiating the cost of your epidural or the terms of your return to work. Believe me, it will help you prepare for the challenges to come. Shannon Keough lives in Minneapolis with her husband Nick and two young children. Send questions or comments to skeough@mnparent.com.
one is on the younger end of the toddler spectrum, it’s not a bad idea to start thinking about the next phase: Preschool. Ask around, talk to your partner and even take a tour or two, because when the time comes, you’ll want to feel familiar with your options and confident in your choice. And how do you make that choice? It depends. Do you favor the free-play, free-form philosophy behind the Waldorf model? Are you OK with a church preschool, even though you’re not religious? Do you need a place that’s more lax on the whole potty-training issue? Is kindergarten readiness what you desire?
Jen
Wittes
Trust your instincts
Preschool: Just think about it
P
reschool. What are you thoughts, Toddler Parent? Wait … let me guess: Is he ready? Am I? My sister-inlaw has been on the waiting list since her second trimester: Does that make me a slacker? Potty training! Does he even have to GO to preschool? Can’t we just hang out here like we always have? Montessori kind
14 September 2014 • mnparent.com
of freaks me out, but everyone’s doing it. Potty training! Wait … what’s the difference between Montessori and Waldorf?
Take a tour Chances are, one or two of these thoughts have cruised through your head — late at night, after reading Kitten’s First Full Moon for the 73rd time. Even if your little
As usual, a reminder to breathe goes a long way, as does the ability to trust your gut. I was a total slacker. I signed my daughter up for the preschool recommended by the neighbors, freaked out at the last minute and pulled her registration before the first day. I sent her the following year, after touring just two schools. The first place I toured had a rainbow painted on the slide — my girl and I thought that was pretty cool. On that particular day, they were making gingerbread men in celebration of the winter holidays. We were invited to participate. These gingerbread men were the size of my head and lay in waiting in front of a decorating free-for-all — candies, sprinkles, gobs of frosting. This would be the snack for the day. Though I thought it kind of an outrageous amount of sugar for a little kid at school, I tried to tell myself it was a special occasion, that I should lighten up. I asked the teacher what snack usually consisted off — you know, on a normal day. “Oh, something like a little cup of marshmallows with a side of juice,” she replied. This was her best foot forward. This was her “let’s impress this mama and get that kid signed up” in the face of the
immediate hyperactive gingerbread, frosting-smeared chaos. It was one small thing, but I couldn’t get over it.
Follow your values In the end, I chose a preschool that was light and bright with a cozy reading nook. It also had a fantastic imagination station with rotating themes. Also? Parents took turns bringing snacks. Collectively, I was pretty sure we could do better than marshmallows. Truth be told, when it came time to pick my son’s preschool — after relocating from the suburbs to the cities — I was equally turned off by the school with a snack of bok choy and brown rice. It came with a side of yoga, composting class and a “Feelings Jar.” While all of those things are really great, they seemed a little heavy handed for nursery school. So I chose the school with — again — parent snacks, a play kitchen and the teacher who gave us hugs after the initial tour. Sunshine, a little handholding and play were my “important qualities” and apparently a snack philosophy somewhere between Willy Wonka and “granolier than thou.”
Plan, prepare yourself But that’s just me. As always, Toddler Parent, you need to do what’s right for you and your child. Whether your child is 1, 2 or 3 — think about what matters most to you and then be prepared to throw it out the window in the face of evil gingerbread men — or the deceptively sinister mung bean! Think now, I say, because the days are long but the years are short and that first day of preschool is closer than you think. And also? There are crazy waiting lists filled with pregnant sisters-in-law. Jen Wittes lives in St. Paul and is a mother of two. She’s helped many Twin Cities families in her work as a postpartum doula. Send questions or comments to jwittes@mnparent.com.
Kimara
Gustafson, MD
I feel like my toddler’s overeating. And she constantly asks for food (not just sweets, either). Should I limit her food intake? Toddler energy requirements — despite their impressive energy expenditures — aren’t abnormally large. In fact, children age 1 to 3 years old need about 40 calories for each inch of height. For example, a toddler measuring 32 inches tall would need approximately 1,300 calories a day. This will vary slightly for variations of
16 September 2014 • mnparent.com
body-build and activity level. An average toddler-sized meal would contain: • 2 ounces of meat or 2 to 3 tablespoons of beans or 1 egg • 2 tablespoons of vegetable • 2 tablespoons of fruit • ½ slice of bread or 1/3 cup cooked pasta
If it seems your toddler is eating much more, even if it’s all healthful foods, it’s best to talk to your pediatrician, who can review her height and weight to see if she’s at risk for over-eating or future weight problems. Try not to make mealtimes a battle. It’s very common for toddlers to go through phases where they insist on eating only one or two favorite foods, or they resist eating certain foods all together. Offer a variety of healthful foods, then let your toddler feed herself and allow her to choose what she eats at each meal. Over time, she’ll likely consume a balanced diet, though it might not seem like it at each meal. Toddler eating habits can vary dramatically. That’s true for our young son, too. For instance, he might eat a very large breakfast, but then seem to not be as interested in snacks or meals for the rest of that day — or he will eat robustly for a few days, but then have a spurt where he seems to only pick at his foods. Because our son can also be a very eager eater, we mentioned our concern that he was eating too much at his last doctor visit. At our pediatrician’s recommendations, we switched from whole milk to 2 percent milk, and are being more mindful about age-appropriate portion sizes. We make sure to offer three meals and one to two snacks per day. We offer a drink (either milk or water) at each meal or snack, so he’s staying well hydrated — and not confusing thirst for hunger.
My infant son constantly spits up after feeding, to the point where he seems to spit up almost his entire bottle. He still has full diapers, so we feel he’s getting enough food, but should we try to limit the amount given? He screams when we stop feeding him midway through a bottle. Are there any tips to limit spit-up? Part of the reason spitting up is so common for babies is because the valve at the top of the stomach is usually not fully developed. This valve opens when food passes from
the esophagus into the stomach and then should close when food is in the stomach. Immature valves can open at the wrong time or not fully close, resulting in spit-up. This is called gastroesophageal reflux (GERD). In babies, this kind of reflux is usually not a serious problem, just a very messy one that most infants outgrow. So what can you do? • If you’re bottle-feeding, consider offering smaller volumes (perhaps not dramatically smaller volumes at first), but more frequently. And use the slowest-flow nipple available to keep your son from filling up before he realizes he’s full. • Nursing moms might consider nursing for shorter times or only doing one breast at a time, but, again, more frequently. • Right after feeding, try to keep your baby in an upright position in a stroller, swing or carrier for 20 minutes or up to an hour. (On a personal note: We found that if we fed our infant son smaller volumes more frequently and kept him upright in the Ergo baby carrier after the feedings for about 20 minutes, the amount he spit up greatly decreased.) • Avoid tummy time after feedings, which is notorious for causing spit-ups. • Don’t be too vigorous with burping after feeding. You can also try, if he’s eating very quickly, to pause during feeding to burp him and possibly let out some extra air. Note: In very rare cases, GERD is severe enough to cause a baby to not want to nurse or take a bottle, be irritable during or after a feeding. If you have concerns that your child’s experiencing severe symptoms, please seek medical care. Dr. Kimara Gustafson is a Minneapolis mother who works as a pediatrician at HealthEast Care System in Maplewood. Send questions or comments to kgustafson@mnparent.com.
SUPER S’MORES By Sarah Dorison S’mores are easy: Toast your marshmallow, then squeeze it — and a piece of chocolate —between two graham crackers. But there’s a serious problem no one ever seems to talk about with this traditional recipe: The chocolate never melts. And the result is a dry treat. Solution: Use Nutella — silky smooth chocolate-hazelnut spread — instead. Slather it on a plate of graham cracker squares before you roast your marshmallows. Then roast and assemble. You’ll marvel at how well everything stays in place with no shifting, melting or dripping.
What about jumbo marshmallows? They’re just too much for standard s’mores (even if you like a high ratio of fluff). Solution: Cut them in half with kitchen shears or scissors. The resulting marshmallow puck provides the ideal surface area (no more squishing the treat into oblivion to get the fluff to spread out).
Don’t have a campfire? If you have a gas cooktop, you can easily roast marshmallows over the open flame if you’re extremely careful. Simply use a regular fork to spear your marshmallow. Hold it about 4 inches over the flame, taking care to make sure it doesn’t catch fire or fall, as you rotisserize.
Nuke ‘em! Wanna skip the flame? Microwave assembled s’mores for as little as 10 seconds or up to 1 minute (until the marshmallow starts to expand, depending on your microwave).
Spreadable marshmallows Another trick: Substitute a few tablespoons of marshmallow creme for regular marshmallows. Check out yummly’s Microwave S’mores Marshmallow Creme Recipes page at tinyurl.com/ microsmores with a wealth of ideas, including Easy Indoor No Bake S’mores Bars.
Variations Try some of these other tasty alternatives to a hunk of Hershey’s: • Peanut butter • Peanut butter cup • Peppermint Patty • Chocolate-caramel square with sea salt • Coconut (ideally toasted) plus a chocolate-caramel square to create a Caramel Delight-style s’more! Sarah Dorison is the Editor of Minnesota Parent magazine. She lives in Golden Valley with her husband and their 6-year-old son. Write her at editor@mnparent.com.
18 September 2014 • mnparent.com
F N APPRECIATION FA FAN APPRECIA IATI IA ATION WEEKEND
mnparent.com • September 2014 19
Jennifer
Wizbowski
How to survive kid sports
O
ne of my favorite parenting activities is attending my kids’ games. Sure, I complain about the busyness of practice schedules. And I don’t always enjoy rushing out the door on a Saturday. But once we start throwing the folding chairs in the car, willing the Keurig to fill our travel cups faster and remembering we didn’t wash the game socks (as we search frantically through the hamper), I get excited. Not only do we get to see the kids in action, we also get to cross paths with a variety of parents and coaches. Between our two kids and their various activities, we’ve experienced the gamut of coaching personalities. My daughter once had a soccer coach who couldn’t seem to be on time. You can imagine the grumbling that went on between the parents as we tried to figure
20 September 2014 • mnparent.com
out, on multiple occasions, which of us was willing to lead the pre-game warm-up routine. Once, he arrived 10 minutes into the game, scarfing down a large breakfast burrito because, he said, he “didn’t wake up early enough” to get his breakfast. In such moments, it’s hard to exercise self-control. But we parents have to remember: Our kids are watching us. So, let’s take a deep breath and exhale: What should the coach — and you and your child — do to make a sports season successful (at least off the field)?
The Coaches It’s unlikely the breakfast-burrito scenario will happen to you. But what should we ask of these individuals who will be with our children — and perhaps influencing their beliefs — two or more days per week? 1. Be on time. If your coach struggles to be punctual, request a short parent
meeting after practice to see if there’s some way to make an adjustment. 2. Encourage/teach all kids on the team.
He or she should take an interest in all the kids, not just the naturally talented or the blood-related ones. If you feel your child isn’t getting fair treatment or attention, consider asking your coach for a fiveminute chat after a practice to express your concerns. I wouldn’t suggest doing this on Game Day, as tensions can be high right after a big win or loss. 3. Teach the game. Ultimately, a coach is there to educate as well as guide the team. Coaches should come armed with a few drills and have the ability to encourage teamwork and fair play, too.
The Parents 1. Be on time. We all have those mornings
when we face Game Day with an unwashed uniform, but if you expect
timeliness of your coach, you need to respect timelines, too. This simple step also communicates to your child the life lesson of punctuality and consideration. 2. Cheer loudly. This might make the introvert in you cringe. But all your child wants is for you to sit on the sideline — and notice that one great kick. And you want to be the first one whooping in excitement. 3. Cheer loudly for the other kids.
(Hint: This will require you to learn their names.) Make sure to notice what the other kids on the team are doing. As loudly as you cheer for your team, keep your comments about the other team to yourself. It’s just good sportsmanship and it keeps the air clear if the parent next to you has a child on the opposing team.
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The Players 1. Learn the game. Encourage your children to play the best they can. Even if they’ve never been exposed to the sport, just giving it their all will get them through the learning process. 2. Respect your coach. Your kids are playing and having fun, but they’ll have even more fun if they can listen and take advice from their coach — and learn to improve their game. 3. Be a vocal team player. It’s important
to learn the fun of being on a team as opposed to just being the star. Teach your child to encourage other players: “Good play. Josie! Great passing!”
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Remember: Your attitude can make the whole experience go smoothly. And don’t forget that morning coffee when you have an 8 a.m. game. It will help you survive a dirty uniform and maybe even a disorganized coach. Jennifer Wizbowski is Minnesota Parent’s new Teens and Tweens columnist. She’s a freelance writer who — if she isn’t driving her kids around — is likely reading a book, walking her dog or out on her paddleboard. She lives in Excelsior with her husband, daughter and son, ages 11 and 13. Send comments, questions and story ideas to jwizbowski@mnparent.com.
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8/4/142014 2:43 PM mnparent.com • September 21
BABY FOOD TOOLS Minnesota Parent couldn’t be more excited to announce a new blogger on mnparent.com, Valerie Moe of Bloomington, a mama who’s fast become an expert in all things baby and, now, toddler. During her journey through the baby-food stage with her daughter, she discovered four products that inspired her to make all her own homemade baby food — which her daughter loved! (Read all her blog posts at mnparent.com/voices/moe-mamas-must-haves.)
POWER CHEF SYSTEM This Tupperware system blends, mixes, emulsifies and chops, but it doesn’t use electricity, and is therefore much quieter than a blender or food processor — ideal if you have a sleeping baby in the house and you need to puree steamed sweet potatoes, squash or apples, for example. It has an easy-pull cord, a 6-cup capacity, an airtight seal, plus three curved blades, a paddle whisk, a funnel with measurements and an anti-skid ring on the bottom. tupperware.com $49-$69
BABY BLOCKS These handy OXO containers go straight from the freezer to the fridge or microwave, and then right into the dishwasher, making cleanup easier. And, most important, they don’t leak! You can grab one in the morning and toss it into a cooler bag (or just the diaper bag if it’s a short trip) without worrying about applesauce leaking all over the place. Each set comes with a handy tray to keep the blocks contained, organized and easy to find in the freezer or fridge. oxo.com babiesrus.com $9.99 for set of four 4-ounce containers, plus a tray
22 September 2014 • mnparent.com
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BABY BULLET TURBO STEAMER You could use any old countertop steamer to prepare veggies for homemade baby food, but why would you when you can find one this cute? And it works fast. Hard veggies like carrots and sweet potatoes steam perfectly in only 13 minutes. Bonus: You can also use it to steam-sterilize various baby items. target.com babiesrus.com $29.99
MASH & SERVE BOWL Skip store-bought banana purees by making your own (and more) with this handy set. Both the bowl and masher have comfort-grip handles. The combination of slotted holes in the masher with the raised edges on the inside of the bowl make it super quick and easy to mash a variety of fruits and veggies into a smooth, lump-free texture. annabelkarmel.com walmart.com $8
mnparent.com • September 2014 23
baby even likes it — he might not. If you then decide you really need the item, you’ll be back at the baby store soon enough. (You’ll be seeing that place in your sleep.)
Eric
Braun
Buy used. Most baby gear is hardly used
before a baby outgrows it, and your little slobberpie won’t care if someone else wore that cute dress a couple times before her. Craigslist can be a good place to find free or inexpensive, gently used items for babies. Kidizen is an app specifically designed for buying and selling “pre-loved kidstuff.” The Freecycle Network (freecycle.org) helps people give away things they no longer need (or get the things they need now). Just be sure the items haven’t been part of a recall. Meanwhile, kids consignment sales such as Just Between Friends and Munchkin Markets are held multiple times a year, including many sales in the fall. Connect with baby brands online. I know:
Don’t spend a bundle on Baby
A
ll parents want what’s best for their kids, and we feel guilty when we skimp on them, even if money’s tight. But new parents are especially vulnerable. They’re stressed out, sleep-deprived, bubbling with hormones, and they’re pretty sure they’re making lots of mistakes. Who could blame them for spending big on the deluxe crib-sheet package? (And, by the way, they ask, is there a set with a built-in heart-rate monitor?) In truth, you need very few things to raise a healthy baby, and pediatricians say, in most cases, simpler is better. A plain sheet is safer than a crib set with bumpers, which carry a risk of suffocation. An ordinary Duplo block or spatula can be more interactive than a blinking, beeping, button-
24 September 2014 • mnparent.com
Who needs more spam? But it can be worth your while to sign up for emails from brands you regularly buy, because they often send coupons and other deals. Most brands also offer contests, specials and giveaways on social media, so like your absolute favorites on Facebook and follow them on Twitter and Pinterest, too. Accept hand-me-downs from friends and
imbued toy. And cold wipes clean baby-soft bottoms just as well as warmed ones. Yet in 2013, U.S. consumers spent at least $23 billion dollars on baby products, including toys, formula, diapers and durable goods such as cribs and strollers. What’s a conscientious new parent to do? Here are 10 smart (guilt-free) ways to save on baby products.
family. Sure, you’d rather pick out the exact
Hold out for a bit. You know, the baby store does things to a person. You go in for diapers, and you walk out with a knobby-tire jogging stroller with shocks. If you find yourself contemplating a swing, baby gym or something else you didn’t know you needed, put that purchase on pause. Go home and do some research. See if you can borrow or test the product to find out if your
Join member-based sale sites for parents.
print you want for onesies. But, honestly, those early days go by fast, and he’ll outgrow those outfits before you know it — no matter what you pay for them. Buy off brands. Sporting designer labels
won’t improve quality of life for you or your babe.
For those who just have to have high-end, on-trend items, websites like Zulily and Gilt offer daily deals on clothes for babies, kids and parents, as well as toys, bedding, strollers and other gear. Many items are deeply discounted, but beware — these are risky waters for impulse buyers.
For those who just have to have high-end, on-trend items, websites like Zulily and Gilt offer daily deals. Join bargain sites for parents. Sites like Baby Cheapskate, MommySavers, and MomAdvice collect deals and coupons from around the Internet. They also offer reviews, best-of lists, advice columns and other useful resources. Get real parent reviews. How many
changing table reviews can you read before you want to poke out your eyes? Save time and make smarter purchases by getting streamlined parent reviews from weeSpring, a one-stop web platform for shopping advice and opinions for parents, by parents. Be wary of mommy bloggers. Real parent
advice is often best, but don’t believe everything you read. Baby brands love to give mommy bloggers free products so they’ll write about them, and many moms feel obligated to say good things in return. Skip educational apps for now. Infants can’t
learn the alphabet no matter what you read in the app store, so don’t waste money on apps that claim to teach it. In fact, these apps may be doing more harm than good if your baby spends more time smudging a touch screen than she does interacting with three-dimensional toys — and with you. Reading and talking with kids is how they learn language. Most of all, trust your instincts. If you’re not sure you need it, you probably don’t. Eric Braun is Minnesota Parent’s new Grows on Trees columnist. He’s a Minneapolis writer, editor and dad of two boys. He’s currently working on a financial literacy book for young readers. Learn more about his other published works at heyericbraun.com.
You can get there. We can help.
Visit www.MN529today.com or call 1-877-338-4646
BOOKS FOR BABIES Minnesota Parent Staff Picks
When it comes to reading to newborns, anything will do. Just read! But if you really want to make the experience special, we recommend choosing something you find meaningful. Your child will sense your energy and even your interpretation of the language. To celebrate this month’s issue — the Baby Issue — we’re skipping the latest and greatest books from publishers near and far and recommending our favorite must-have classics. We loved them when we were kids. We hope yours will, too!
Love You Forever This book is a favorite of mine. I remember reading it when I was younger, so I was excited to read it to my daughter. The book is about a mother’s love for her baby and how that love continues as her son grows to be a teenager (with strange friends) and then a grownup man. The mother sings a song to her son at night (even as an adult): “I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always. As long as I’m living, my baby you’ll be.” The story comes full circle as the mother grows older and the son sings the same song to his new baby daughter. — Valerie Moe, Senior Graphic Designer By Robert Munsch Illustrated by Sheila McGraw First published: 1986
Chicka Chicka Boom Boom Skit scat scoodle-doot flip flop flee, this classic is the best, if you ask me. Rhyming, and letters, and plenty to see, it’s just so great to read to baby. Chicka Chicka Boom Boom, you’ll want it for your newborn’s room. — Dana Croatt, Creative Director By Bill Martin Jr. and John Archambault Illustrated by Lois Ehlert First published: 1989
On the Day You Were Born This award-winning book’s sweet, soft tones have been described as soothing, radiant and rhythmic — all ideal for quiet reading time with a new baby. I love how Frasier honors the natural world as she describes the power and mystery of the planet — and the universal glory of every birth — in poetic detail. I’ve read this to my son since birth and he’s always loved the poetry of it, plus its simple pictures with bold, colorful contrasts. This book helped me pause and marvel at the joy of my new baby boy and his tiny place in the cosmos. — Sarah Dorison, Editor By Debra Frasier First published: 1991
26 September 2014 • mnparent.com
Papa, Please Get the Moon for Me I like the simple story line about a dad and his daughter. She really wants the moon, so he does everything he can to get it. But getting the moon is hard. It’s too big and too far away, so he has to be persistent. He really wants to give her the moon. The style of book is fun, too, with the typical Eric Carle paper-collage art, plus pages that fold outward and upward into a variety of formats. — Chris Damlo, General Manager By Eric Carle First published: 1986
Katie the Kitten This Little Golden Book was my favorite book as a kid. (And I still have it, though it looks very worn.) I don’t know if I liked it because it had my name in the title or if I really liked cats. It’s a short, simple read that details a day in the life of a small, playful kitten. Written in verses that rhyme, it’s easy to memorize quickly. — Kate Manson, Sales Administrator By Kathryn and Byron Jackson Illustrated by Leslie Morrill First published: 1949
C
G G N N I V I V R U S S
C I COLIC COL NOT ALL BABIES SUFFER FROM IT. WHY DOES YOURS? AND HOW CAN YOU COPE? By Jen Wittes
mnparent.com • September 2014 29
Y AB BY BA UR YO RB OU Y
CRIES.
That’s normal, of course. • But what if your baby really cries? A lot. And you begin to hear repeatedly — when in the presence of grandmothers, opinionated observers and even your pediatrician — the word “colic.” • The Mayo Clinic defines colic as predicable periods of distress in an otherwise healthy, well-fed infant. • Secondary dictionary definitions name sharp stomach pain, with the origin of the word pertaining to the colon. • From these two common descriptions, it’s easy to see why many assume that a colicky baby is a gassy baby. The truth — much to the frustration of parents struggling nightly with this exhausting affliction — is that colic is still somewhat of a mystery. • We’re not entirely sure what causes it.
Here’s what we do know Babies cry. Crying — even frequent crying — is not colic. A diagnosis of colic is generally given to a baby who cries for at least three hours per day, three days per week, for three weeks or longer. The crying starts seemingly out of nowhere and ends abruptly. The baby seems inconsolable. Nothing the parent does seems to help. Physical symptoms include curling of legs, clenching of fists and tightening of the abdomen. Colic usually happens at the same time every day, most commonly late afternoon or early evening. It usually starts within a week or two after birth and improves drastically at 3 months. The mystery lies in both cause and cure. Is it a stomach issue? If so, is it gas? Does the gas come from extra air taken in during crying jags? Or does the crying come from the stomach pain? Is this an emotional issue? Neurological? Is something else wrong? What, if anything, helps? Dr. Alexandra Hall — a family practitioner and mother of two from Menomonie, Wis. — found what she understood as a physician went out the window when her own son fell into an intense and harrowing period of colic. Combining both her professional and personal experiences, Hall had this to say: “Personally, I think it is somehow
“
TO HAVE THIS TINY BEING THAT YOU LOVE WITH ALL YOUR HEART SPEND HOURS A DAY IN TERRIBLE SUFFERING, WITH YOU YOURSELF POWERLESS TO EASE IT, IS INCREDIBLY DISTRESSING, NOTWITHSTANDING THAT YOU ARE SLEEP-DEPRIVED AND HORMONALLY CHAOTIC. — Dr. Alexandra Hall
30 September 2014 • mnparent.com
STUDY: MOTHERS WITH A HISTORY OF MIGRAINES ARE TWO AND A HALF TIMES MORE LIKELY TO HAVE A BABY WITH COLIC. gastrointestinal. But I also think it’s neurologic — having to do with the brain control of the gut. Why? Because it starts out of nowhere and then all of a sudden stops.” Babies suffering from colic seem emotionally distressed, and there’s anecdotal evidence to suggest that parental anxiety contributes to the intensity and duration of colic. Parents — already worried, exhausted, hormonal and raw — can’t imagine being blamed for their child’s inconsolable crying. And yet, the bond between parent and child is so strong, it’s natural for a baby to respond to her parent’s emotions — and vice versa. Here we have another chicken-egg situation, much like the question of cause and effect between crying and gas. Is the parent anxious because of the colic? Or is the baby colicky because her parent is anxious? It is, perhaps, a catch-22.
Migraine link? A 2011 study at the University of San Francisco Pediatrics Clinic done by Dr. Amy Gelfand found a link between migraine and colic. Recurring migraine headaches are known to be hereditary. In Dr. Gelfand’s study, mothers with a history of migraines were two and a half times more likely to have a baby with colic.
SOOTHE YOUR BABY WITH THE 5 Ss Swaddling: Tight swaddling provides the continuous touching and support your baby was used to in the womb. Shushing sounds: Make shushing noises close to your baby’s ear. This loud whooshing sound may simulate the noises of the womb. Swinging: Newborns are used to swinging motions from their mother’s womb. Rocking, car rides and other swinging movements all can help. Sucking: Sucking on breast, bottle, finger or pacifier triggers a calming reflex and releases natural chemicals in the brain. Side/stomach position: Place your baby on his left side to assist in digestion or on his stomach to provide reassuring support (but never for sleep and never unattended). Source: The Happiest Baby on the Block by Dr. Harvey Karp. See happiestbaby.com
32 September 2014 • mnparent.com
Are episodes of colic an infant’s first migraine? Interestingly, stomach upset is a common symptom of migraine, too. The study circles back to Hall’s suspicion that colic is both neurological and gastrointestinal. One possible takeaway from all of this inconclusive information is that colic almost always involves the gut.
Take a break, work in shifts And there’s definitely an emotional aspect to consider, too. That piece may very well come from the pure nature of the beast: Colic can be catastrophically hard on a family. Said Dr. Hall, “I’ve been through a lot of harrowing experiences in my life, most of them during medical training … 36-hour shifts, patients coding. Nothing came close to the trauma of an infant with colic. “To have this tiny being that you love with all your heart spend hours a day in terrible suffering, with you yourself powerless to ease it, is incredibly distressing, notwithstanding that you are sleep-deprived and hormonally chaotic. “Truthfully, it was a huge part of our decision to not have another child.” According to both Dr. Hall and the Mayo Clinic, the only serious complication of colic — and it’s a big one — is the possibility of Shaken Baby Syndrome. Ever wonder if and how that actually happens? This is it. Parents and caregivers don’t want to hurt the baby — they basically snap after hours, days and weeks of trying everything, on very little sleep. This is why the most important practice in dealing with colic is taking a break. Parents must work in shifts, call in the grandmothers, hire a trusted and experienced doula or nanny. Walks around the block in the fresh air, a short drive listening to happy music or a cup of coffee at the local cafe can go a long way in terms of resetting the patience button and refreshing the weary spirit. The parent alone with their baby during an episode of colic is better off putting their child down in a safe place and walking away for a minute or two rather than continuing on as frustration and anxiety become intolerable.
What can you do for your baby?
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Talk to a homeopath Another avenue parents can explore is homeopathy, a form of alternative medicine that involves highly diluted substances, given mainly in tablet form, with the aim of triggering the body’s natural system of healing. Tana Harahan, a homeopathic practitioner specializing in pediatrics at HippHealth Center for Holistic
mnparent.com • September 2014 33
Healing in Minneapolis, describes colic as a cramping of the intestines caused by underlying emotional upset. Harahan says, “This can be something as simple as not having needs understood and met immediately and range to a traumatic event that occurred to the baby or to mom while in utero. “Babies’ nervous systems easily become oversensitive, which will affect their digestion.” Harahan says there are many homeopathic remedies for colic, such as a chamomilla supplement, made from chamomile and pulsatilla, another supplement, also derived from herbaceous plants. She uses a wide variety of treatments
34 September 2014 • mnparent.com
based on the whole-health picture of the mom and baby, also taking into account the characteristics of the particular case of colic.
Keep yourself calm As for that parental anxiety, here’s the catch-22: If baby screams at 5:30 every night, the parent will start to tense up at 5:15, and the baby will experience that tension. While not the reason for colic, this may prolong the agony and contribute to the cyclical pattern. Though challenging, it’s best for the parent to try to remain calm and to see each day as new and different. Yoga, meditation, a cup of tea or a catnap just before that 5 o’clock witching hour can help, but the most important need of the parent is that brief intermission. Take a break, reset and try again. This, too, shall pass. Jen Wittes lives in St. Paul and is a mother of two. She’s helped many Twin Cities families in her work as a postpartum doula. Send questions or comments to jwittes@mnparent.com.
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“Babies do not come with instruction manuals, but, as a parent, you figure it all out.” — Megan Truenow, Kimball
Wisdom for new parents Real Minnesota moms share what they wish they’d known before they had their first baby
What could be more awesome than a new baby? If you’re secretly thinking: “A lot of things, actually,” we feel you. Your baby is supposed to be the best thing that’s ever happened to you. But your little darling can turn your life (body, mind, spirit) and everything else (your identity, marriage, career, extended family) upside down — even if you did literally everything mentally and physically you could to prepare. It’s just hard. So we asked Minnesota moms and dads to share one thing they wish they’d known before they had children and what was especially hard in their first child’s first few months. You are not alone, after all.
“You don’t need every baby item that the mass market makes you feel like you need. Keep it simple!” — Trina Greene, Farmington
36 September 2014 • mnparent.com
“WHEN YOUR BABY IS TEETHING YOU PROBABLY AREN’T GOING TO GET ANY ‘REAL’ SLEEP LIKE YOU WERE BEFORE.” — Jessica Larson, Minneapolis
“Once you think that you have understood the rules of parenting, they change the game.” — Wendy Anderson, Oakdale
“If you become a parent, you start a never-ending journey of learning!” — Alina Madan, Maple Grove
“I wish someone had told me that once the baby takes a bottle, don’t take a week off from giving it to them. Now she hasn’t taken one since!” — Rachel Nelson, Eagan
“I WISH I WOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT MISTAKES WERE GOING TO BE MADE AND BABY WILL BE JUST FINE. I SPENT MY SON’S WHOLE FIRST YEAR THINKING, IF I WASN’T PERFECT, I WAS GOING TO MESS HIM UP FOR LIFE. HE IS ALMOST 4 NOW AND DOING JUST FINE.” — Jennie Hinsz, Brainerd
Wisdom for new parents
“JUST WHEN YOU START TO WORRY ABOUT SOMETHING, IT GOES AWAY AND YOU HAVE A NEW WORRY.” — Kristan Frend, Edina
“Trust your gut. You can read all the books in the world and still not be prepared. Do not let the wisdom from the experts stop you from trusting your natural instincts.” — Sarah Frank, Waconia
“Enjoy your personal reading because it will be many years before you will be able to read chapter books again.” — Julie Nelson, Columbia Heights
“YES, YOU’LL EXPERIENCE A NEW LEVEL OF EXHAUSTION AND SLEEP DEPRIVATION THAT HITS YOU LIKE A TON OF BRICKS. BUT YOU’LL ALSO FIND THAT YOU’RE TOUGHER THAN YOU THINK.” — Kelly Jo McDonnell, Lino Lakes
“I wish someone had told me how much free time I really had before — and to take advantage of it!” — Theresa Cooke, Coon Rapids
38 September 2014 • mnparent.com
“I wish someone had told me how lonely it is to be a stay at home mom.” — Tricia Heagle, Brooklyn Center
“My first son just wouldn’t eat. We had nurses and lactation specialists grabbing my boobs, trying to force him to eat. And there wasn’t that loving bond you and your baby are supposed to experience. When I finally got the blessing from my sister that it was ‘OK to use formula,’ I was like, ‘Thank God someone actually said it, so I didn’t feel guilty in making the decision.’ I felt like a horrible mother because it wasn’t the ‘natural’ thing to do, and there’s so much pressure about breast milk being best.” — Sonja Haataja-Day, Menahga
“Everything is a phase. I’ve figured it out by my third, but it sure would have been helpful when I thought the crying would last forever or assumed the snuggles would last forever!” — Jill Ganske, Pine River
mnparent.com • September 2014 39
Wisdom for new parents
“Nothing introduces you to the heart-pounding, sweaty-palms, sick-to-your-stomach feeling of anxiety like parenting. You are in charge of a tiny little life. And that’s certainly a big job.” — Kelly Plummer, Forest Lake
“I wish someone had told me to blog or journal any chance I got because it all goes too fast and the memories are what you have left to hold on to.”
”Sleep in twohour increments.”
— Alexis Todd, Plymouth
“LOVING YOUR BABY IS IMMEDIATE, AUTOMATIC AND VERY POWERFUL — LIKING THEM? UM, AT TIMES, NOT SO MUCH. IT’S HARSH, BUT IT’S REAL FOR A LOT OF NEW MOTHERS. I DO NOT APOLOGIZE FOR IT AND NEITHER SHOULD YOU.” — Christie Cuttell, Cottage Grove
— Jennifer Callahan, Mound
“Don’t worry about keeping the house clean with kids. Enjoy your kids instead!” — Jessica Remington, Hutchinson
“No one told me I would drive to the doctor’s office more than once hoping something is actually wrong with my child so that I would know why he has red bumps, a diaper rash, spits up a lot and cries more than he sleeps — all to be told, ‘Looks great! Keep doing what your doing!’” — Christie Cuttell, Cottage Grove
40 September 2014 • mnparent.com
“I wish someone would have told me to create a mama group of friends while pregnant so I’d have mama friends with little ones to have play dates with.”
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— Elizabeth Sharma, St. Paul
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“Parenting takes team work. My husband and I seem to never be on the same page will how to deal with certain situations.” — Allison Holen, Isanti
“SLEEP DEPRIVATION LASTS FAR LONGER THAN THE FIRST YEAR OF A BABY’S LIFE. MY GIRLS ARE 3 AND 5 AND I’M STILL NOT SLEEPING ALL NIGHT.” — Jodie Norquist, Pequot Lakes
mnparent.com • September 2014 41
Baby makes one more How to prepare a sibling for a new addition By Corey Butler
W
hen you’re 3 years old and the only child in the house, change can be difficult to handle. You’ve been pampered, perhaps, your entire life and, presumably, have had things fall in your favor more often than not. Then mom and dad decided to make the family a quartet. Oh. Well, that’s different. That’s a huge adjustment. Luckily for Josie Barum, a Farmington toddler with a baby brother coming soon, her parents — Tamara and Mark Barum — have worked to make her transition to big sister a gradual one. In fact, they’ve spent the past nine or so months trying to help her adjust. “We talk about it all the time,” Tamara said, weeks before their son, Cooper, was to join the gang. “Josie, where’s the baby?” Mark asks. “In mommy’s tummy!” she says excitedly, pointing to Tamara’s stomach. “For the longest time, it was, ‘That’s my baby brother-sister,’” Tamara said. “It took awhile to get it to be just ‘brother.’ ” Now, it’s “my Cooper.”
mnparent.com • September 2014 43
Tamara and Mark Barum have worked hard to help their daughter, Josie, gradually get ready for her big-sister role. PHOTO BY COREY BUTLER
Include your child Child involvement is a key part of easing the transition to an expanded family, said Kate Saumweber Hogan, a licensed midwife with Twin Cities Midwifery. That might include going to prenatal checkups, where children can, when appropriate, help with measurements of the baby, listen to the baby’s heartbeat and, of course, feel for movement. To share in the joy of the expanding family — rather than feel left out or extraneous — a sibling also can help with phone calls, messages and letters that announce the pregnancy or even the arrival on the big day of birth. That way, “they get to be the messenger and share exciting news,” Hogan said. The Barums included their daughter in their pregnancy announcement — and had a little lighthearted fun: After Tamara had her first ultrasound, she taped a picture of the baby in utero — and an eviction notice — to Josie’s crib. She took
44 September 2014 • mnparent.com
a photo with Josie standing in the crib to share with their friends on Facebook.
Get ready early Transitioning to a brand-new family dynamic doesn’t necessarily come easily, however, for the older sibling once the baby is born, Hogan said. This, after all, is the single biggest adjustment many young children are asked to make (and it’s not exactly a snap for the parents either)! Sibling rivalry starts at birth. “It’s going to be natural to talk about the baby coming,” Hogan said. “You want to really talk about what the child’s role is going to look like. All of us do best if we know what to expect.” For the Barums, that message has been loud and clear from the start. “It wasn’t about getting something new,” Tamara said. “It was about her becoming a big sister.” Hogan said it’s important to take steps well in advance of the birth.
BOOKS FOR YOUR CHILD
Waiting for Baby / My New Baby by Rachel Fuller (age 1 and up)
One Special Day by Lola Schaefer (ages 2 to 5)
I’m a Big Brother and I’m a Big Sister by Joanna Cole (age 4 to 8)
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Talk about the baby and how big brother/sister will be involved, of course!
From 4 months through 12 years, classes promote development and build confidence during each stage of childhood.
Minimize major life changes for a child expecting a new brother or sister, including weaning, toilet training and starting a new preschool or child care. Attend sibling-preparation classes at local birth and parenting centers.
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Make household changes well in advance of the birth, including sleeping arrangements and car seat placement.
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Bring older siblings to prenatal visits and let them help whenever possible. Study drawings that show the baby’s growing size, and talk about the baby’s development week by week, or month by month. Talk about what babies are really like so expectations are positive but also realistic: Babies cry, sleep and need a lot of care. They aren’t good playmates at first.
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Bring your child to visit a friend with a new baby, if possible, or visit the newborn room at your child’s daycare. Teach your child how to touch and hold a baby gently using a doll. Model gentle feeding, swaddling, rocking, reading, singing, even supporting the baby’s head. Talk about how mom will be tired — and how she will need to rest for a few weeks or more once the baby arrives — and that siblings can snuggle in bed with mom and even take care of her by bringing her snacks and water.
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8/11/14 9:08 AM mnparent.com • September 2014 45
Josie, 3, and her dad Mark Barum of Farmington, prepare a new room for her little brother before his arrival earlier this year. PHOTO BY COREY BUTLER
If you’re moving a child from the nursery to a new room, do it well in advance of the birth or — if the baby stays in the parents’ room at first — well after the birth. If you’re going to move your older child’s car seat to a new spot in your vehicle, Hogan suggests doing it at least it six to eight weeks before the baby arrives so the soon-to-be-sibling can get used to his or her new space. No “turf” is lost. For Josie, getting a new sibling meant getting a new room that she was allowed to help design and paint. She also picked out new sheets. After the bedding was in place in her new room, Josie was asked to make a decision: Do you want to sleep in your baby room or your big girl room?
SHOULD YOUR CHILD ATTEND THE BIRTH? Many families have found including their children in the birth of a sibling to be a positive experience, but it’s not necessarily right for every family. If you decide to include your child, make sure you designate an adult caregiver whose only job is to be there for the child. Prepare your children thoroughly, by watching videos of births, bringing them to midwife or doctor appointments and talking with them about what the sights and sounds of labor may be like. Perhaps give your child a special age-appropriate job, such as putting a hat on the newborn baby.
46 September 2014 • mnparent.com
Without hesitation, she went with the big-girl room.
Balance your attention Of course, the idea of a new baby is a lot different than actually living with a new sibling. Children may feel confused about all the time their parents are spending with the new baby instead of them. That’s why parents need to be attentive to their older child’s needs, despite the urgent demands of a new baby, Hogan said. When friends or family come to visit, Hogan said, leave a sign on the door asking people to wash their hands, keep visits brief and to spend time with the older sibling so he or she doesn’t feel left out. It can also help to ask the older sibling to assist with singing, feeding and, when appropriate, diapering the baby. If your older child can gain a sense of pride in caring for his or her new sister or brother, he or she may feel more excited, included and grown up — and less threatened! Finally, be sure to acknowledge — and continue to reinforce — the important and role siblings play in the new family birth order: Some kids might even enjoy wearing their position on their sleeves: Carter’s and other children’s clothing brands offer T-shirts with phrases like “Cool Big Bro” and “Big Sister.” You can even find coordinating smocks and bibs for the little ones proclaiming: “Little Sister” and “Cool Little Bro.” Corey Butler lives in Northfield with his wife and toddler, with Baby No. 2 on the way.
HOW CAN I HELP MY CHILD ADJUST TO THE NEW BABY? Set aside special time for your older child. Each parent should spend some uninterrupted one-on-one time with the older child every day, even as little as 10 minutes. Let the child choose the activity. Listen to how your child feels about the baby and the changes in your family. If your child expresses negative feelings, acknowledge those feelings. Don’t deny or discount them. Help your child put the feelings into words. “Baby” your child a bit if that’s what he or she seems to crave. This may help stave off regression in areas that are less acceptable to you. Gifts: Have the new baby and older child “exchange” gifts. Set aside some special “big brother” or “big sister” gifts to give your child when friends and relatives start showing up with baby gifts, so your older child won’t feel left out. Remind visitors to pay attention to your older child, too, not just the baby. Make sure the older child has a special, private space with things of his or her own that needn’t be shared with the baby. Allow older siblings to help with the baby’s care — bathing, dressing, pushing the stroller. But don’t overdo it. Follow your child’s lead. Point out the benefits of being an older child, like choosing what to eat, having friends and being able to go the park and play.
Sources: Twin Cities Midwifery and the University of Michigan Health System. Learn more at twincitiesmidwifery.com or tinyurl.com/preparingforasibling.
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BAKER’S JOY! Every mama needs a creative outlet. For Ashley Stentz — who lives in Brooklyn Park and works (as director) at the Laurel Village New Horizon Academy in downtown Minneapolis — it’s making cakes for her friends and family, including her sons, Aiden, 5, and Connor, 1. Stentz learned to bake by watching her Finnish grandmother when she was little. She got into decorating when she worked at TCBY during high school and college. “When our store manager went on vacation one summer, I volunteered to make the custom cakes and pies. They sold well and I never had an unhappy customer. “Through special orders, I started brainstorming ideas of cakes I could make — and, over the years, I’ve just continued to bring those ideas to life.”
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48 September 2014 • mnparent.com
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Moving in together
Benefits of a multigenerational household go far beyond financial
By Patricia Carlson
M
ichele Knife Sterner knew the questions and comments she’d hear before her family had even finished unpacking their boxes. “You’re moving in with your parents? Why?” “I could never do that. You’re crazy.” “Your poor parents. They just can’t get rid of you.” The chorus of naysayers, however, couldn’t prevent Sterner and her family — including her husband, Oak, and
Living together is back Americans didn’t always look down on multigenerational households. At the start of the 20th century, a whopping 57 percent of people ages 65 and older lived in homes with their children, grandchildren or other family members, according to a report from the Pew Research Center, a Washington, D.C., nonprofit research organization. During the Great Depression and throughout World War II, it was normal for families to live together to make ends meet and support each other through tough times. Then came a period of abundance and independence in American history. By 1990, just 17 percent of older Americans were
50 September 2014 • mnparent.com
their daughter, Kaziah, 8, and son, Felix, 4 — from joining households with her parents in Marshall. This spring, the nuclear family of four became a multigenerational family of six. “Living with your parents gets a bad rap — and I think that’s sad,” Sterner said. “I wish more people would see the value of being with their family.”
living in multigenerational households. During that time, living separately from extended family members became a sign of financial success and independence, said Sterner, an associate director in the Academic and Diversity Resources Department at Southwest Minnesota State University. “But we’ve lost our culture — and some of our values — because of this distancing from our relatives,” Sterner said. “People feel alone. They feel separated.” That trend has been reversing, however. Longer life expectancies, rising health care costs, a rise in immigration, couples marrying later, Baby Boomers retiring in droves and the lasting effects of the
economic downturn have all been citied by researchers as factors. Boomerang kids — college students who return to live with their parents instead of setting up their own households after graduation — are another part of the uptick. According to a Pew report, the number of Americans living in multigenerational households had been increasing by about 2 percent a year from 1980 to 2006. But, in 2007, multigenerational housing surged dramatically along with the Great Recession. “Without public debate or fanfare, large numbers of Americans enacted their own anti-poverty program in the depths of the Great Recession: They moved in with
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relatives,” a 2011 Pew report said. “This helped fuel the largest increase in the number of Americans living in multigenerational households in modern history.” By 2009, the number of Americans living in multigenerational households spiked to more than 51 million, including 20 percent of Americans ages 65 and older.
Emotional bonding But the economy is only part of the picture. Stories behind the families who embrace the multigenerational lifestyle are as individualized as the family members themselves. And the benefits of living together go far beyond financial, said Quinn Iwen. Iwen had always been close with her mother, Susie Dickson. But after Dickson went through divorce, she needed help finding her footing — and Iwen was right there to help. Iwen, at the suggestion of her husband, Chad, invited Dickson to live with them. It was a gesture that still brings Dickson to tears. She was thrilled, but a bit tentative, at first.
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“I felt, and feel, blessed,” Dickson said. “I’ve always been close to my kids, but I didn’t want this to ruin that special relationship. “Just the opposite has happened. We The Cremation Society™ of Minnesota “We are Minnesota’s Cremation Specialist” have really made this work.” Serving the entire state of Minnesota and western Wisconsin. Dickson moved in when Iwen and her Owned and Operated by the Waterston Family. husband were expecting their first child, www.cremationsocietyofmn.com Tatum, in 2010. Since then, they’ve welcomed their son, Brax. When it came time to build a new home north of Fargo Cremation Society MNP 1113 NR2-Urn V6.indd 1 10/17/13 10:40 AM in Harwood, N.D., they made room for Dickson, too. She has her own bedroom, bathroom and living space. Today the family is going strong. In fact, they get along so well they even take vacations together. Every year, they rent a two-bedroom cabin on Floyd Lake north of Detroit Lakes. Dickson said she’s found strength after her divorce in multigenerational living — not just in the feeling of togetherness that it provides, but also the joy of sharing a household with her grandchildren. “My grandchildren repaired me after my divorce,” she said. “I wouldn’t have made it through without them. I can’t imagine life without them.”
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Figuring out how to divide up finances is an important step for many multigenerational families. When Sterner and her husband decided to move into her parents’ house, for example, they all sat down as a group and discussed what bills would need to be
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paid. They decided to split certain costs such as utilities and heat. But they kept other bills — cell phones for them, landlines for her parents — separate. Both generations plan to start saving money, too, and their new arrangement should make it easier. Multigenerational living arrangements aren’t always half and half, however. For the Cromwell family in Moorhead, the tradeoffs are different, though just as valuable. Last year, Bethany Cromwell asked her parents, Dan and Colleen Weir, if she and her husband, Richard, and two children could move in with them after deciding to relocate to Moorhead. Bethany and her husband, both teachers, hadn’t established full-time positions yet, so they knew they couldn’t help much with household payments. Instead, they do a larger share of things around the house like shoveling snow and mowing the lawn. Colleen Weir says knowing her daughter and son-in-law are at home gives her an unexpected benefit — a sense of security, especially when she and her husband travel. “My husband and I are gone quite a bit, and it’s nice to have someone at the house,” she said. “We don’t worry about leaving home. We know they’ll take care of things.”
Freedom and flexibility Bethany Cromwell says moving in with her parents has made her a better mom.
“I wouldn’t have enough time to talk to my kids everyday if it weren’t for my mom and dad,” she said. “I would’ve been so wrapped up in my daily activities — working, taking care of the house, running the kids from this to that — that I just wouldn’t be able to spend quality time with them. Now, we all talk and take care of the kids.” Spouses who’ve become the primary caretakers of ailing partners can get some relief, too. Sterner’s mom, Karen, for example, battles diabetes, and it’s taken a toll on her mobility as well as the couple’s ability to get out and about. It’s been tough on Sterner’s dad, Mike, because he loves to get out socialize. Since their families moved in together, Mike gets to go out a lot more and Karen has someone to hang out with at home. “It’s a win-win,” Sterner said.
Passing on culture, values By nature, multigenerational housing arrangements promote a greater understanding family history and interpersonal relationships. Children get to witness all sorts of dynamics in a multigenerational household — from the obvious multigenerational family dinners to subtle grown-up parent-child relationships and communication with in-laws, plus grandchildgrandparent bonding. Sterner has been especially happy to see how her children have learned more about their heritage since moving in with her parents. Her mother is a full-blood American Indian Sicangu Lakota and she freely shares her culture, customs, language and stories with her grandchildren. “I think the impact my parents have had on my children is incredible,” Sterner said. “Just the other day, my daughter was watching a Wile E. Coyote and The Road Runner cartoon and my mother commented how that is a traditional Lakota story where the coyote is the trickster. “That shared knowledge and continuation of culture is one thing my children will get from my parents.”
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Patricia Carlson is a mother of two and a full-time freelance writer who divides her time between Minnesota and Florida.
mnparent.com • September 2014 53
Out About
PARENT PICK
Monarch Festival
Using art, music, dance, games and more, this festival raises awareness about the monarch butterfly’s 2,300-mile migration to Mexico. Festivalgoers can get an up-close view at monarch eggs, caterpillars and butterflies — and enjoy food, music and activities. When: 10 a.m.–4 p.m. Sept. 6 Where: Lake Nokomis Naturescape Gardens, Minneapolis Cost: FREE Info: monarchfestival.org
SEPT. 3–7 Burnsville Fire Muster Carnival rides, fireworks, kids activities, emergency personnel demonstrations, food and drinks and a fire truck parade (11 a.m. Saturday, Sept. 6) make this four-day festival a hit with kids. When: Sept. 3–7 Where: Civic Center Park, Burnsville Cost: Buttons, required for ages 5 and older, are $5 or three for $10 in advance. Buttons are required to gain entrance into Civic Center Park after 5 p.m. on Friday or Saturday (Sept. 6 and 7). Info: burnsvillefiremuster.com or 651-308-1006
54 September 2014 • mnparent.com
The Defeat of Jesse James Days Celebrate the townspeople who defeated the infamous bank robber Jesse James and his gang with parades, craft shows, live music, exhibitions and bank-raid re-enactments. When: Sept. 3–7 Where: Downtown Northfield Cost: $4 for ages 6 and older Info: djjd.org or 800-658-2548
SEPT. 5–7 James J. Hill Days This large community event features an open-air street market, a carnival, fireworks, a car show, a water-ski show, dachshund races, a parade and live music
(including the Goo Goo Dolls Sept. 6). When: Sept. 5–7 Where: Lake Street, Wayzata Cost: FREE; some events are ticketed. Info: jamesjhilldays.com or 952-473-9595
SEPT. 6–OCT. 26 Scarecrow Festival Celebrate fall with wagon rides, a scarecrow contest, a giant haystack jump, a petting zoo, maze and more. When: 10 a.m.–6 p.m. Sept. 6–Oct. 26 Where: Emma Krumbee’s, Belle Plaine Cost: $5, free for ages 2 and younger Info: emmakrumbees.com or 952-873-4334
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APPLE ORCHARD SEPT. 7–21 Sundays at Landmark This cultural series celebrates community with arts experiences for families on select Sundays Sept. 7 through May 10. September events include a Mid-Autumn Moon Festival Sept. 7 and a Landmark Center Nook and Crannies Building Tour Sept. 21.
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Truhaven Wild West Fest Immerse yourself in the Old West with pony rides, games, whip-cracking demonstrations, re-enactments and food at this fund-raising festival benefiting Truhaven Ranch’s youth and equine programs. When: 10 a.m.–2 p.m. Sept. 13 Where: Truhaven Ranch, Winsted Cost: $10 for ages 12 and older, $5 for ages 4–11 Info: truhavenranch.org or 320-485-2449
Wild Rice Festival Learn about American Indian cultures and traditions at this celebration featuring food, activities, educational opportunities and exhibits featuring local Native American drumming, dancing, storytelling and ricing methods.
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When: 8 a.m.–4 p.m. Sept. 13 Where: Harriet Alexander Nature Center, Roseville Cost: FREE Info: wildricefestival.org or 651-765-4262
SEPT. 14–27 Paw Pals A trained four-legged friend joins story time at this relaxed event for ages 6 to 12. When: 2–3:30 p.m. Sept. 14, 12:15–1:15 p.m. Sept. 27 Where: Central Library, St. Paul Cost: FREE. Registration is required. Info: sppl.org or 651-266-7034 ISD 191 Community Education MNP 0914 H4.indd 1
8/11/14 5:12 PM mnparent.com • September 2014 55
Out About
Have a Wild Birthday at Como Zoo!
SEPT. 14
OPENING SEPT. 16
Caponi Art Park Bluegrass Festival
Busytown the Musical
Nationally and regionally touring bands such as The Okee Dokee Brothers, Monroe Crossing, Roe Family Singers and the Blackburn Trio take the stage at this first-ever community celebration of music, a fundraiser for Caponi Art Park. When: Noon–6 p.m. Sept. 14 Where: Caponi Art Park, Eagan Cost: $20, FREE for ages 12 and younger Info: caponiartpark.org or 651-454-9412
Storywalk at Summit Monument
for children ages 3 and up!
Pages from books will be on display along the park path to read as you walk on this self-guided tour. This month’s book is Leaves by David Ezra Stein (recommended for ages pre-K through early elementary).
Call 651-487-8272 for more
When: 1–3 p.m. Sept. 14 Where: Begin at Summit Monument at the intersection of Mississippi River Boulevard and Summit Avenue, St. Paul Cost: FREE Info: sppl.org/grade-school/storywalk
Fun Birthday Parties
information or to schedule your party. 56 September 2014 • mnparent.com Como Zoo MNP 0914 V6.indd 1
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This cabaret-style musical, based on the book What Do People Do All Day by Richard Scarry, invites audiences to boogie down with the residents of Busytown (recommended for children in kindergarten through grade 4). When: Sept. 16–Oct. 26 Where: Children’s Theatre Company, Minneapolis Cost: Tickets start at $10. Info: childrenstheatre.org or 612-874-0400
SEPT. 19 Dinner and a Movie: Finding Nemo Enjoy the children’s film with a meal and dessert provided, plus group games for children after the film. When: 6:15–8:45 p.m. Sept. 19 Where: Linden Hills Park Recreation Center, Minneapolis Cost: $8 for Minneapolis residents, $12 for non-residents Info: minneapolisparks.org or 612-370-4913
PARENT PICK
Bellyrama Mothers, bellies, birth and babies are all celebrated at this fifth-annual yoga festival for expecting mothers, new moms and their families. Enjoy music, dancing, yoga, face painting, vendors and giveaways for all ages. When: 9–11 a.m. Sept. 13 Where: Lake Harriet Bandshell, Minneapolis Cost: FREE Info: blooma.com
OPENING SEPT. 19 James and the Giant Peach The Roald Dahl classic comes to life on stage as James begins a journey across the ocean with new friends Centipede, Earthworm, Grasshopper, Ladybird and Spider. When: Sept. 19–Oct. 19 Where: Stages Theatre Company, Hopkins Cost: $16 Info: stagestheatre.org or 952-979-1111
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The Center for Reproductive Medicine is seeking women between 21 and 33 years of age to donate eggs for couples who cannot otherwise achieve pregnancy. You will be compensated for your time and dedication.
SEPT. 20–21 Lakeville Art Festival More than 70 artists, alongside live music and food vendors, will help kids explore their creative side at this art festival, including special appearances by cartoonists and caricature artists. When: 10 a.m.–5 p.m. Sept. 20–21 Where: Lakeville Area Arts Center, Lakeville Cost: FREE Info: lakevilleartfestival.org
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4/14/142014 12:50 PM mnparent.com • September 57
Out About PARENT PICK
Sever’s Corn Maze and Fall Festival Revel in autumn with a giant slide, petting zoo, live music, magic shows, food and a zip line. When: 1–8 p.m. Fridays, 10 a.m.–8 p.m. Saturdays, 10 a.m.–6 p.m. Sundays, Sept. 12–Oct. 26 Where: 1100 Canterbury Road S., Shakopee Cost: $13 for ages 4 and older, free for ages 3 and younger Info: severscornmaze.com
SEPT. 20 Excelsior Apple Day Celebrate apples at this lakeside festival with a pie-eating contest, a kid’s corner, live music, a boat show and more. When: 9 a.m.–6 p.m. Sept. 20 Where: Lake and Water streets, Excelsior Cost: FREE Info: excelsior-lakeminnetonka chamber.com or 952-474-6461
Hike & Seek Engage your child’s sense of adventure with a family outing combining a nature hike and scavenger hunt. Enjoy a one- to two-mile hike with interactive Stop & Study nature stations and more, sponsored by the National Wildlife Federation. When: Noon–3 p.m. Sept. 20 Where: Lebanon Hills Regional Park, Eagan
58 September 2014 • mnparent.com
Cost: Tickets start at $12 for adults and $7 for children ages 17 and younger. Info: hikeandseek.org
Nature Family Fun Make nature discoveries while meeting new friends at this program for parents and their children, ages newborn to 5 years. When: 10–11:30 a.m. Sept. 20 Where: Maplewood Nature Center Cost: $5 per child Info: maplewoodnaturecenter.com or 651-249-2170
Kid Flix Children’s music artist Duke Otherwise will perform songs from his debut album, Creepy Crawly Love, before a show of selected shorts from the New York International Children’s Film Festival. When: 10:30 a.m. Sept. 20 Where: Minneapolis Central Library
Cost: FREE Info: hclib.org or 612-543-8000
SEPT. 21 Bark and Rec Day This outdoor event for dogs and dog lovers features children’s activities, demonstrations and vendors raising money for homeless companion animals, plus a Wiggle Butt 5K Fun Run. When: 8 a.m.–2 p.m. Sept. 21 Where: Harriet Island, St. Paul Cost: FREE Info: mars.dojiggy.com
Washburn Games Children ages 4–12 are invited to try out two dozen different sports activities — such as cricket, football, lacrosse, soccer and more. Every participant will go home with a T-shirt, medal and goodie bag in this
SEPT. 27 10AM – 2PM
PRESENTS THE 9TH ANNUAL
Como Park Zoo Visitor Center
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Out About fifth-annual fundraiser for the Washburn Center for Children. When: 1:30–4:30 p.m. Sept. 21 Where: Bryn Mawr Meadows Park, Minneapolis Cost: Kids are encouraged to raise $100 for the event or make a $10 minimum donation. Info: washburngames.org
SEPT. 23 Acorns and Animals Listen to a fall-themed story, take a nature hike and discover the important role acorns play in the lives of squirrels, blue jays and weevils as they prepare for winter.
Bring this ad into the store or use code 5AUG14 online for $5 OFF a SoftBums Diaper!
When: 10–11:15 a.m. Sept. 23 Where: Maplewood Nature Center Cost: $5 per child. Register online by Sept. 21. Info: maplewoodnaturecenter.com or 651-249-2170
1LOVEBABY SoftBums MNP 0814 V6.indd 1
SEPT. 25–28 Handmade Worlds
7/17/14 1:13 PM
Puppets and puppeteers from around the country will gather for a three-day festival featuring performances, workshops, panel discussions and two puppetry cabarets. When: Sept. 25–28 Where: Locations include In the Heart of the Beast Puppet and Mask Theatre and Open Eye Figure Theatre, both in Minneapolis, among others. Cost: Single and multi-day passes are available. Info: handmadeworlds.org
SEPT. 27 Dakota/Ojibwe Family Day: Toys and Games Test your hand-eye coordination, improve your math skills and practice handicrafts with the toys and games of the Dakota and Ojibwe tribes. Kids will learn good sportsmanship, patience and other life skills. When: Noon–4 p.m. Sept. 27 Where: Minnesota History Center, St. Paul Cost: Print free advance tickets at smithsonianmag.com/museumday
60 September 2014 • mnparent.com Rain Taxi MNP 0914 V6.indd 1
8/7/14 10:07 AM
as part of the Museum Day Live! Info: mnhs.org or 651-259-3000
Fall Public Raptor Release See rehabilitated raptors released back into the wild and meet some of the Raptor Center’s education birds. Birds will be released in two groups (once in the morning and once in the afternoon). When: 10 a.m.–3 p.m. Sept. 27 Where: Carpenter St. Croix Valley Nature Center, Hastings Cost: FREE Info: raptor.cvm.umn.edu
Get Out and Grow! Open to all ages and abilities, St. David’s Center Fun Run and Festival celebrates the great outdoors with family-friendly activities such as horse-drawn wagon rides, mini golf and nature crafts. When: 10 a.m.–2 p.m. Sept. 27, fun run starts at 9 a.m. Where: St. David’s Center, Minnetonka Cost: FREE Info: stdavidscenter.org/5K or 952-939-0396
Minnesota Parent Education Fair Meet representatives from the best early learning, school and after-school programs in the Twin Cities — and have some fun with a professional photo booth, face painting and giveaways. When: 10 a.m.–2 p.m. Sept. 27 Where: Como Park Zoo and Conservatory Visitor’s Center, St. Paul Cost: FREE Info: minnesotaparent.com/ed-fair or 612-825-9205
Museum Day Live! Participating museums across the U.S. will emulate the spirit of the Smithsonian Institution’s Washington, D.C., facilities, which offer free admission every day. When: Sept. 27 Where: See smithsonian.com/ museumdaylive for a list of 18 participating Minnesota museums. Cost: FREE with advance tickets Info: smithsonian.com/museumdaylive
· Birthday Art Parties · Release Day Classes · Drop–In Paint · Member Specials
MORE ONLINE Want to learn about even more local events? Check out Minnesota Parent’s easy-to-navigate online Out&About calendar. Just click on the day you have free — or desperately need an activity or outing — and find things to do! See mnparent.com/calendar.
SEPT. 28 Caponi Art Park Medieval Fair
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Step back into the Middle Ages with authentic costumes, music, dance, weaponry and demonstrations at this event presented by the Society for Creative Anachronism. When: 11 a.m.–4 p.m. Sept. 28 Where: Caponi Art Park, Eagan Cost: $5 per person suggested donation Info: caponiartpark.org or 651-454-9412
OPENING SEPT. 30 Seedfolks Nine-year-old Kim undertakes a mission to transform an abandoned lot into a flourishing garden with help from her community in this play designed for children in grades 3–8. When: Sept. 30–Nov. 9 Where: Children’s Theatre Company, Minneapolis Cost: Tickets start at $10. Info: childrenstheatre.org or 612-874-0400
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WEEKENDS Raptors of Minnesota Meet a variety of live raptors and learn what you can do to help protect the environment. Tour The Raptor Center and the outdoor housing area, home to 32 education raptors. When: 1 p.m. most Saturdays and Sundays Where: The Raptor Center, St. Paul Cost: $8 for adults, $5.50 per child/student Info: raptor.cvm.umn.edu or 612-624-4745
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BABY RESOURCE GUIDE
Blooma Blooma nurtures the mind-body-heart of women and their families. Blooma offers prenatal and postnatal yoga, yoga bonding, family yoga, childbirth education, plus classes for active moms looking to get fit, unwind, and connect. Childcare is offered during many classes. Be Blooma Well! 5315 Lyndale Ave S Minneapolis 612-223-8064 493 Selby Ave St. Paul 651-340-8538 blooma.com
Bump Club Twin Cities Bump Club and Beyond connects moms and moms-to-be with information, experts, products, and each other at events across the country every month. From girls’ night out, lunch & dinner seminars, classes, and more, we have something for every woman currently pregnant and beyond. Katie.Blozis@ bumpclubandbeyond.com. 952-412-5199 bumpclubandbeyond.com
Child Garden Montessori School Child Garden Montessori School provides all-day, all-year Montessori childcare to
62 September 2014 • mnparent.com
children ages six weeks to six years. We support your child’s academic, social, emotional, and physical development in our prepared environments with our beautiful Montessori materials. Child Garden is education for life! 1601 Laurel Ave Minneapolis 612-377-1698 childgardenmontessori.com
Dentistry for Children & Adolescents Our dentists and team members are committed to providing your child with the highest standard of pediatric dental care from birth to age 19. We believe with good home care, regular dental visits, and preventive procedures, your child can grow up cavity free. 7373 France Ave S #402 Edina 952-831-4400 14050 Nicollet Ave S #100 Burnsville 952-435-4102 6060 Clearwater Dr #210 Minnetonka 952-932-0920 childrensdent.com
Do Good Diapers Do Good Diapers offers a range of
sustainable diapering options to make parents lives easier, greener, and less gross. From cloth diapers delivery to bio degradable diapers with composting we have babies covered. dogooddiapers.com 612-990-2183
Early Childhood Family Education (ECFE) Early Childhood Family Education offers high-quality parent and early childhood education for families with children between birth and kindergarten age. ECFE works to support parents and to provide the best possible environment for each child’s learning and growth. Offered by school districts throughout Minnesota ecfe.info
ECFE ISD 191 Early Childhood Family Education A place to learn and grow together. Build family relationships through child led play experiences, parent education, and support from licensed educators and other families. Weekly classes, playtimes, and events offered at sliding fees for parents and children birth to pre-K. Burnsville, Eagan, Savage 952-707-4150 communityed191.org
ADVERTISER LISTINGS Enlightened Mama
Levander, Gillen & Miller, PA
Mis Amigos Spanish Immersion
Empowering Birth, Baby, Breastfeeding and Beyond. Enlightened Mama provides evidence-based education and unbiased support throughout the journey of pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, and parenting. We build confidence to inspire strong, healthy mamas, babies and families. We offer full wellness services for the whole family at Enlightened Wellness. 970 Raymond Ave Ste 200 & G-40 St. Paul 651-528-6733 enlightenedmama.com
Let us help you prepare for your family’s future and take care of your loved ones. We provide all levels of estate planning services from basic Wills to naming a guardian for your children to more complicated trust-based tax savings plans. We will work with you to develop a plan that addresses your unique family circumstances. Contact us today. 633 S Concord St, Ste 400 S. St. Paul 651-451-1831 levander.com
Ensemble Music
Little Gym of Edina, The
Music and movement classes for infants, toddlers, preschoolers, and children with special needs. Specializing in Music Together and Suzuki Piano lessons. Join us for a free class at one of our eight metro locations. Metro-wide 800-728-2692 ensemblemusic.net
The Little Gym is a non-competitive gymnastics facility that offers classes for children between the ages of four months and 12 years old. We offer gymnastics classes, dance classes, parent-child classes, and sports classes. If you have kids, we have options. 8223 Hwy 7 St. Louis Park 952-924-0083 thelittlegym.com/edinamn
“Giving Children The World.” Serving ages 16 months to 8 years. Full-day options and summer camps available. Infant classes available with parent or caregiver. Native Spanish speaking teachers. Call or email to schedule a tour today! Hopkins 952-935-5588 Minnetonka 952-935-5588 St. Paul 651-728-3261 St. Paul Park 651-728-3261 misamigosimmersion.com
Especially for Children For over 38 years, Especially for Children has provided high quality childcare and education for Twin Cities families. Our NAEYC Accredited programs foster the development of the whole child. Visit us today! Bloomington, Circle Pines, Coon Rapids, Eagan, Eden Prairie, Edina, Inver Grove Heights 952-857-1100 especiallyforchildren.com
Lake Area Discovery Center A high-quality, NAEYC accredited Christian-based Preschool/Childcare serving families at nine metro locations, offering affordable/flexible full and half-day schedules for children ages 16 months-5 years old. Four-year-degreed teachers engage the “whole-child” in welcoming, stimulating classrooms designed to meet the needs of young children. Metro-wide 651-762-7884 ladcfamilies.org
Minnesota College Savings Plan The Minnesota College Savings Plan is a flexible tax-advantaged 529 college savings plan designed to help families save for a loved one’s future college education. The Plan is administered by the Minnesota Office of Higher Education and managed by TIAA-CREF Tuition Financing, Inc. 877-338-4646 mn529today.com
Minnetonka Early Childhood Family Education Explore new parenting experiences, meet other families, and grow and learn together with your child. ECFE serves all families with children ages birth to kindergarten. Get the information, friendship, and support you need parenting a young child. 4584 Vine Hill Rd Excelsior 952-401-6812 minnetonkacommunityed.org
Morning Star Women’s Health & Birth Center Morning Star specializes in cost-effective, non-institutional health care, and the Midwives Model of Care! Receive women’s health, early newborn, and comprehensive maternity care from start to finish in our beautiful licensed and accredited free-standing birth center. Our education-rich program is empowering and family-centered. Insurance accepted. Come for a free consultation! 6111 Excelsior Blvd St. Louis Park 612-922-4784; 1730 E Superior St Duluth 218-722-2700 morningstarbirth.com
MyoCare MyoCare provides pre/postnatal massage to help you feel better, and heal naturally. Services are available in any Twin Cities area hospital. In-home services available. Great gift for a new mom in need of a little extra care. Metro-wide 612-547-0085 myocarehealth.com
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BABY RESOURCE GUIDE
ADVERTISER LISTINGS
Nine Maternity Clothes Consignment Nine Maternity Clothes Consignment offers one of the largest selections of maternity clothes in the Minneapolis area. Offering a large inventory from casual wear to business attire, along with maternity dresses, swimsuits, and more. And don’t forget to come back and become a consignor with us! 912 Mainstreet Hopkins 952-935-2944 nineconsign.com
One Love Baby We are your natural baby experts! One Love Baby Co. carries products ranging from toys and SoftBums Cloth Diapers, to carriers and nursing gear. Also offering groups for new moms and drop-in playdates, we provide a fun and educational setting for parents to connect. 13720 Lincoln St NE Andover 612-216-4213 1lovebaby.com
New Horizon Academy
high-quality care and education. Statewide Locations 888-291-9811 parentaware.org
St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development Our Early Childhood Education program serves children ages 16 months – 5 years with flexible, year-round scheduling. With a curriculum that focuses on nurturing the whole child, we build pre-academic skills while also promoting social, emotional, and physical development. 3395 Plymouth Rd Minnetonka 952-548-8700 stdavidscenter.org
tooth & co Nurturing Young Smiles. Do your kids have a ‘DENTAL HOME’? Dr Ellie Sakhi welcomes you to her new practice. Beautiful new location, convenient hours. Latest technology. In-office and hospital sedation dentistry. Infants to late teens. First visit by first birthday. Free infant exam. 4330 Hwy 7 St. Louis Park 952-920-8234 toothandco.com
SPECIAL SIZE: 7.375” WIDE BY 3.2” HIGH
New Horizon Academy is a Minnesota family owned child care program that provides exceptional child care to over 7,000 children, 6 weeks – 12 years, everyday! All eligible programs are accredited by the National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC). 763-557-1111 newhorizonacademy.net
Parent Aware
Parent Aware helps families find the quality care and education their children need to succeed. Parent Aware is a search partner. We work side-by-side with families, offering free resources to help them make informed choices about
— 24 YEARS OF EXCELLENCE —
Mis Amigos Spanish Immersion
Nannies from the Heartland
Offering classes for Infants through Preschool Free Mom & Ba by Classes
Playing Singing Composing Free Preview Classes Ages 3-Adult
Call 952-935-5588 and schedule a tour! www.misamigosimmersion.com
Locations in Hopkins, Minnetonka, St. Paul, and St. Paul Park
CYMS Edina: Edina Community Center 5701 Normandale Rd
CHILDREN’S YAMAHA MUSIC SCHOOL Celebrating Over 40 Musical Years in Minnesota!
www.cyms.ws • 612-339-2255
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CYMS Roseville: Hamline Center 2819 Hamline Ave N
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Maple Tree Cottage
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South Mpls. Preschool Program • Waldorf-Inspired Program • Trained, Licensed Teacher • Mornings with Lunch Option • Organic Whole Foods Snacks www.mtcottage.com
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Creative Kids Academy
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Free Music, Spanish, Yoga, Storytelling and Karate!
Catalina’s Preschool Spanish Learn SpaniSh with Your ChiLd
MAPLEWOOD
FREE PREVIEW CLASS Monday, 11:30 a.m. September 8 & 15
7/10/14 7:55 AM
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sing. play. learn. Theme shows for ALL AGES and BUDGETS! 30th Anniversary! Nationally awarded & recognized by child development experts!
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Half Pint Parties Magic • Facepainting Balloon Animals Characters for Parties & Events
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Lessons * Horse Camp * Birthday Parties Public Guided Trail Rides by Appointment Only
Year Round Riding Lessons Indoor Arena
Have a Wild Birthday at Como Zoo!
Not just on for the ride—learn all the basics about horses. (ALL AGES)
651-226-2027
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PLACE AN AD :::: 612-825-9205 MNPARENT.COM
Fun Birthday Parties Sunnyside Stables, Inc. Rosemount, MN www.sunnysidestables.org
for children ages 3 and up!
Call 651-487-8272 for more information or to schedule your party.
8/13/142014 12:55 PM mnparent.com • September 65
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From our readers
Time for bed
PHOTOS OF THE MONTH
HOW DID YOU GET YOUR BABY TO SLEEP? Black-out shades, a cocoon-like sleep sack and a lot of luck! — Meghan Ondracek, Stillwater
We swaddled and started CIO (cry it out) at 2 months. We soothed him, but let him cry a little longer each interval. He went from waking every 90 minutes to sleeping 12 hours within 5 days. We had a very strict schedule and stuck to it like glue. We thought we were the smartest parents in the world. Then we had No. 2 and were totally humbled.
Greta Schaeffer, 3, of Maple Grove, explores a play-tunnel at a family gathering in Plymouth. “I got lucky with this photo,” said her dad, Greg Schaeffer. “I just shoved the camera in front of me inside the dark tunnel and snapped the photo.”
— Katie Lawler, St. Louis Park.
We did a structured schedule from the beginning and stuck with it. Same bedtime and nap times everyday from infancy. We had two babies sleeping through the night by 4 months! — Lauren Bourassa, Rice
Seth Counihan, 4, son of Carolyn and Jason Counihan, explores Bauer Berry Farm in Champlin. Photo by Carolyn Counihan / carolyncounihan.com.
Leo Karnas, 20 months old, samples the crop at Fireside Orchard & Gardens in Northfield. Photo by Sarah Karnas.
Let him fall asleep with me and then transferred to the crib. — Holly Kimball, Montrose
Our first co-slept until 7 months and fed on demand. For our twins, starting at 2 weeks, they co-slept with each other for 4 months. Routine was very important. — Angel Sandriepe, Minneapolis Want to see your kid(s) on this page? Send your favorite photos to editor@mnparent.com.
66 September 2014 • mnparent.com
Henley Morrissette’s bright eyes sparkle on a trip to the park for family photos with her parents Colleen and Steve Morrissette of Minneapolis. Photo by Dawn Busch Photography.
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